Plumbing the Death Star - What Type of NPC Would You Be?
Episode Date: August 30, 2020Sign up to our newsletter here. Join our facebook group here.You can now physically send us stuff to PO BOX 7127, Reservoir East, Victoria, 3073.Want to help support the show?Sanspants+ | Shop | TeesW...ant to get in contact with us? Email | Twitter | Website | Facebook | RedditOr individually at;Jackson | Duscher | ZammitTheme music by the wonderfully talented Benny Davis! You can find all his stuff at his website or check out his YouTube channel. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Stan's Pants Radio. see would you be okay so you've loaded up your nest with plumbing the death star the video game
yeah 1986 trademark before it even says press start it's like the winners don't do drugs thing but winners
is it's corrupted so it just says do drugs or don't do drugs you're like what and then and then
it moves on to the opening splash screen of plumbing the death star the video game you log
in you encounter some npcs yes who are they I think they're plumbing the Death Star, Jackson.
If we're using an NPC based on ourselves and classic kind of NPCs
and what they do is I feel I would be a quest giver.
Okay.
But a lot of the quests are going to be very basic.
And it's going to look like when you're playing the game,
like those first quest givers that you encounter, is like your very very simple tasks and it's going to be like that for the rest
of the game and a lot of it is just going to be very simple fetch quests where it's kind of like
give me that book and it's going to be maybe just three steps to the right or like make me a coffee
basically a lot of delegation delegation of very simple tasks
that can be completed mostly around the first level.
Like, there's never going to be anything complicated.
Maybe the most complicated is going to be, like,
go to the shops and pick up some milk.
Is it the kind of thing where on the back of the game,
it's like, you know, literally infinite quests?
Countless numbers of quests.
Yeah, like a Skyrim style.
It's the same thing. Again and again and again and again well it's not the same thing it's just the same type of thing
and a lot of it is maybe like the the quest dialogue will sort of sound like it's to do with
the storyline but then you'll realize that oh wait it's just it's just this guy wants things done that aren't necessarily related.
I don't know how building a bed is related to building a podcast empire,
but by golly, he's got his employees to do that.
It's great to imagine.
Yeah, that is very you.
Jackson, Jackson, your job now is making this chair for me.
Okay.
Jackson, I've had to remove an air conditioning unit from
the wall of a a building that was being half knocked down yeah that was a sans pants radio
job that's not in our job description at all what i don't know well it's good that you imagine you
load in and you're like welcome traveler to defeat the evil lord grimlock first you must train make me a latte coffee
okay here's the coffee i don't know how this is helping ah your training has just begun
put sugar in this coffee okay ah it appears we are out of milk go to store get milk
while you're out there, hey
My neighbor needs their dog walked
It'll feel like
Those quests that are in
Or missions that are in Grand Theft Auto San Andreas
Where you do a mission and it just ends
And plays that sound of like mission complete
But then it just says plus respect
And you're like
What did I actually get for doing that?
Nothing?
I don't think I got experience or anything.
I'm not close to leveling up.
What does plus one respect mean?
There's no respect stat.
It's not a new area that opens up or whatever.
It's kind of like, oh, I guess this is opening up the shops.
And it does.
But the only reason you need to go to the shops is my quests.
To do quests for Zamit.
Yeah.
Wait a second.
But it takes you way too long to realise.
Because maybe in your house, Zamit, behind you,
there's like a sword, like in a case or something,
and you've kind of put it in your head as you're playing.
You're like, I must get the sword once I do all the quests.
But the trick is the quests are infinite and the sword is merely decoration maybe even what your alternate dialogue
is just like look at my nice sword and you're like i will surely surely i get the sword if i do all
the quests it's the implications that you will get this lovely sword at the end but you never do
no you're folding a fitted sheet for you which is unimaginably complicated but you're looking at the end, but you never do. No. You're folding a fitted sheet for you,
which is unimaginably complicated,
but you're looking at the sword and the case.
You're like, surely.
Surely if I do all his washing, cook him dinner.
You know, like games have like for the different levels,
how far percentage you are complete.
That one, for some reason, it's just imperceptibly slow.
You've done a million quests, complete what is happening man that sword must be really good it must be he keeps
talking at it and occasionally i see it sparkle i don't know what wind sparkles yeah like a like
an item i can pick up but if i go over to it it says the case is locked. I will get this sword. Hey, smell this milk and tell me if it's off.
Click.
Select option.
Smell milk.
It is off.
It's off.
Plus one respect.
There are rumors in there.
If you use the game shark, you can access the sword.
So it must be accessible.
There.
It's one of those things in the game that like it happens
occasionally it's super frustrating of like there's an npc that has an item that you assume
you're gonna get but then they just use it like it's just like their sword absolutely maybe like
after you get to the uh 50 respect mark the random uh dialogue will change so don't worry i'll i'll
help you in the end so you're like oh is he, is he going to help with Gunner giving the sword?
Or is he going to come with?
I don't...
50% completion and you're like, I have something to show you.
And you're like, here it is.
And you just open the case and then close it again.
This is my sword.
This is my sword.
And the stats of the sword maybe come up and they're really impressive.
And then, yeah, it looks cool huh and you only have like you know usually you have like look open pick up or
whatever but like pick up is grayed out and you can't select it so you're like but but instead
of pick up it just says admire it's like you admire zamit's cool sword you wish you had a
sword this cool and then Zammett you're like
hey can you check the crisper of my fridge
I haven't removed the lettuce in there
and I think it's old
plus one respect
surely this is leading to a sword
surely
you check progress it's dropped down to 45%
you're like wait what
how
every time you admire the sword, you lose 5%.
I'm sorry.
I don't respect people that admire the sword.
I should have made that clear before you admired the sword.
I know we had a little bit of a cut scene
where the only way to progress was to admire the sword,
but you should have figured that out.
That was just to show you the play
of what admiring the sword will do,
because you wouldn't know otherwise.
Anyway, fix this chair and you'll get that 5% back.
Anyway, oh, look, that lawn is looking pretty long.
And I think also some of the quests aren't really explicit.
A lot of them are simply like,
ah, it'd be nice if that bed was built.
Yeah.
And you're like, and I imagine that these, as you progress,
they don't become different, but they become more frustratingly obtuse where they're like and i imagine that these as you progress they don't become different but they
become more frustratingly like obtuse where they're like oh it'd be nice if the bed was fixed
and you go over to and it's like you don't have the necessary tools and you're like where where
are the necessary tools and you just go over to you and you're like i know you can get tools nearby
and you're like what does that mean what are you saying are they in the house do i have to go
to the shops what is there a hardware option where you can pick up an item called nails but
it's somehow not the right item you need an item called like nails comma bed or something
the nails actually have no function they're just there to piss you off
please remove the rat boy from my garage
it's me i'm having a cameo
rat boy refuses to wake up you click on me and it like gives you the option of remove
and you click remove and it's like he isn't budging it just doesn't tell you how to get me to move move he isn't budging well what up too slippy to pick up is this game
trolling me i don't know what the fuck is going on really what you're meant to do in that situation
is go back to you and be like he won't move and you're like, oh, and then you get the next quest. Plus one respect.
Did you wake him up? No.
Yeah, I figured.
Plus one respect.
Because you've got to wait another hour
real time, then go back.
Step on his head.
Kick in
head.
Yeah?
Rat boy is awake.
It's 3pm, get out of bed. Give give me five minutes and then i go back to sleep for another hour the plus one respect thing is only available if you like if you look at your
statistics you know you can do that in games sometimes and it just has respect in a number
next to it you don't know what it refers to what it means is it just how
many of zamit's quests you've done will it be relevant later no one knows and it seems to have
no upper echelon it could just go on yeah forever exactly and again and a lot of the like so there's
so much implication in the quest dialogue like yeah man if you get that sword you'd have a lot of respect and then you go and you like get to 100
99 in your area and it's like to get to 100 you better complete the game and that's when you go
into the next like section of levels but then when you come back at the end of the game the sword's
just not there like it never was and returning to your area gives you the extra percentage
and you get nothing that's how I assume
it goes I imagine you can just finish the
level by just leaving and then you come
back and Sam has just done the stuff
himself he's like yeah I did it it's no
big deal it's like one of those yeah
it's like like oh yeah you can spend six
days doing all this or just leave and
they'll store them himself.
Yeah, there's no negative repercussions.
Yeah.
Literally nothing will go wrong if you let him do it himself.
In fact, the game seems to enjoy it, to be honest.
The game is like, hey, where'd you go?
I did all the things I needed anyway.
How you been?
Welcome back.
Yeah.
Nothing changes. I like to imagine i'm dressed in my uh like a
lovely like my blue robe uh boots um and boxes that's it yeah and i like to think there's also
the implication that this is the tutorial for the game but you never learn anything that's relevant
later like the sword maybe you click on it and you're like one of your dialogue options is like
um sword play is important in your coming adventure and you're like one of your dialogue options is like sword play is important in your coming adventure
and you're like okay so I'm gonna
train with him at some point using the sword
but no never nothing
that happens in level one
prepares you for the subsequent levels
even a little bit
not at all but the
implication is that it does
it's designed to make you upset
at this level and and I like that.
That's good. I guess if you do everything
the house looks really nice.
It's happy. The only way
to fail the level is if you promise to do
something and then don't do it.
Everything's timed, but you don't realise.
Negative one respect.
Turns out the plus one
respect is just how much Zamit respects you.
And it never goes above a five.
Oh.
I've reached the limit.
Yeah.
Well, the Plumbing the Death Star game has a hidden ending at the start of the game,
similar to Far Cry 5, where you can just quit working for Sandspants,
and then you get plus 20 respect and the end credits.
Or for a chiptune version of baker street for some reason thank you for playing plopping the death star do drugs
do drugs so yeah i don't think probably the best way to complete my level would be yeah
uh remove rat boy from garage uh so yeah they've uh completed my uh
yeah my uh section of the game uh i guess on to you jd level two
yeah so i don't know if uh i know jackson isn't familiar with this i'm not sure if you are
zamant or if the listeners are but in tony hawk underground it's the first time that the tony
hawk games let you kind of explore an open world situation and you could just get missions from
fellas oh yeah uh and sometimes those missions are just like hey man be real cool if you could
do these tricks and they're like sick that was so I filmed it and you can give this to a pro skater
to add to your skate tape or whatever.
Okay.
So I like that,
but I also like in a video game called A Short Hike,
there's a fella that's like,
hey man, can you get me 15 shells?
And then you get them and you're like,
here you go, kid.
Why do you want the shells like i
don't know i just wanted them i want to combine those together okay okay okay you're like similar
to zamit there's no respect or money or experience involved i'm just like hey man do a kickflip
yeah sick but i imagine the tricks get harder and harder. So the player has been primed for like, okay, plus one respect.
Cool.
I guess this is a game that's based on respect.
They finish that level.
They go to yours.
And then they're like, okay, I finished the quest.
It's a skating game now.
Okay.
I did the trick, but it didn't come up with a mission complete.
The douche NPC is saying, well saying well done like i've completed it he's giving me another one but i didn't get any is it i like it i like
the idea of like my mpc's program so that like i'm like do a kickflip you do a kickflip i'm like
sick and then my character just turns around and then you're like well that and then you go around
to the front of you again and you're like do a kickflip and you do it and then you're like well that and then you go around to the front of you again and you're like
do a kickflip and you do it and then you're like sick and exactly the same sound bite and just
wait am i meant am i doing your whole section of the game is the feeling am i doing it wrong
like maybe it comes out you're like sick and it comes up plus zero respect and you're like
i must have i must
have fucked it up because i didn't get any i'll do another kickflip do two kickflips sick
there's a hidden ending in my level as well where if you make if you do so many
kickflips quick enough i drill myself into the ground around too much is that what I was is that what I was
meant to do
do drugs
I just love
an NPC
that's like
programmed in a game
just no story progression
there's no input
they're just like
hey it'd be cool
if you did this thing
yeah
that was cool
that's real cool
that was cool
I was right
like in fucking
Spider-Man Homecoming
hey Spider-Man
do a flip and then that guy's just stoked that Spider-Man does Spider-Man Homecoming Hey Spider-Man Do a flip
And then that guy's just stoked
That Spider-Man does
Spider-Man doesn't have to
That guy doesn't give a shit
He's just like
Yeah sick
If anything
You just give that
You give that guy
Well the guy in this situation
Is me
Too much power
I'm like
That guy did something
For my entertainment
And my entertainment only
What I like about this
Is if you're the first NPC
That person meets Is the implication Again it's all about the implications the implication there
is that ah this npc is important so i guess i gotta keep doing a kickflip but like if they
just kept going it's fine you can just skate on this level if they want it's cool to imagine
every time you do a kickflip you say sick it goes plus zero respect and the little text box comes
out down the bottom that's like dusha thought that was pretty sick and that's it that's the sequence of events it's
really it's quite elaborate yeah sick plus zero so dusha thought that was pretty sick if you come
and talk to me when you're not holding a skateboard i'm like hey man and that's it
that's great how do you leave the level is it obvious i hope not you just keep walking and
then you meet another npc that actually gives you instructions i guess but are there many
doucher npcs on the way that request various more difficult skating tricks the idea that it's lots
and lots of me's in this level just like only npcs of me i'll just be like hey man it'd
be real cool if you could give me a lift is that a skating trick no i just need to get somewhere
this becomes known as the skater level it's just like you actually get the skateboard uh maybe in
level three or four but if you come it just was really weird that this npc just just kept appearing
in this level.
Every time you went and interacted, they would just say,
hey, man, and that was it.
That was it.
That's the hey, man level.
But if you go back with a skateboard,
you have the option of doing like a kickflip and a lift
and all these kind of things.
We're not sure.
We think you might be able to.
I think you have to hunt down every Douche NPC and do every trick
At least once and maybe you might
Get some
Maybe you'll get to be more tricks
Drill us all into the ground
You drill every douche NPC
Into the ground they all collectively say
Oh fuck and that's it
And then a rainbow appears
Like a little achievement Is this a drill to rag or part
of the game i don't know why would they include an entire selection and the ability to do so many
tricks if it wasn't relevant to the game how about this how about this as a little bit of i know it
goes against the whole like ethos of it just being absolutely mundane and pointless but if they say
like you know 50 odd
little douches running around or in like we're not running anywhere oh no just in the area
you drill all of them maybe it drills like through the level and now you have access to a sweet
subterranean level that maybe just has one ramp yeah yeah absolutely it's like it's like when you
unlock a separate area in tony hawk and like, oh, it's, I mean,
like, it's cool, but it's just more Tony Hawk.
It just looks like hell now or a jungle.
And then you're like, oh, is this, what do I do in this thing?
And then it's like every single Doucher NPC is just like, hey, do a kickflip.
That would be sick.
It's cool if you look at your statistics and it just says, like, how happyer is with your skating and there are different ones but it's never a number it's
just like pretty happy he likes it like do they change is that what i'm aiming to get
they're never negative he thinks it's sick he's a fan i like the idea of like dialogue options
with me without a skateboard seeming like that it, a quiz, but there's no right or wrong answer.
Like, hey, man, what music do you like?
And then there's, like, four genres to pick from.
I'm like, oh, yeah, cool.
End of conversation.
Hey, what's your favourite movie?
And then a list of, like, four movies.
Like, oh, yeah, that's a good one.
What is this level?
I don't know.
And you only have the option of, like, oh, yeah, that's a good one. What is this level? I don't know.
And you only have the option of, like, doing it once,
so you can't choose multiple answers, like, on that playthrough.
So, like, oh, maybe if I played it again and did a different combination,
it might mean something?
Yeah, but I guess...
No, never does.
Not even close.
Not even a tiny bit.
I don't know if they do this in other, like, GTA games.
I'm only remembering it from GTA 3.
It was kind of like those weird stats that it kind of collects.
So it's like most times you had a beach ball bounce on your head.
Yeah.
But yeah, basically like that.
Like how many kickflips?
It just goes up one.
It just infinitely rises.
I like that at the start of the douche level,
you should be able to pick your difficulty,
but it changes nothing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And they're called like Wimp,unk absolute beast or something like at the very end it's just kind of like oh
when you clock the game um you wait after the credits or whatever like a douche mpc comes on
screen and it's like hey how many kid clips did you do and you get to input your answer no matter
what it says it's like oh. That's like heaps.
That's more than me.
Unless you say one that I'm like, I did the same.
It's good as well if at the end, like, a Doucher NPC comes up
and you're like, hey, I've got a request.
Or like, even just text on the screen,
Doucher has a request for you.
And you're like, oh my, what's this going to be?
And you're like, hey, could you do one last kickflip?
And you do, and you're like, I'm sick. And it just comes up, Doucher still thinks you're sick oh my what's this gonna be and you're like hey could you do one last kickflip and you do and you're like sick and it just comes up douches still thinks you're sick
you're like what was the point of any of that i thought it's only if you complete the game
with the skateboard still in your inventory yeah oh absolutely if you throw the skateboard away at
any point douche is like oh don't do that it comes up on the screen don't do that i want to see more
kickflips and if you finish the game with
no skateboard uh the dialogue box at the end of the game is like have your answers to me changed
yes or no if you click yes it's like oh okay and if you click no i'm like sick but there's no
further questions if you say yes i'm like oh okay changes nothing is this like a i i don't know like a like a visual novel that i'm doing what game is this
yeah sick uh yeah and now a quick word from our sponsors
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So I think that's great NPC, Dusha, first of all.
Thank you.
I think I'm the kind of NPC level 2 complete
I guess
yeah
when you just
keep scrolling
I'm imagining it's
kind of like top
down
have you ever seen
the 720 early
arcade skating game
it's kind of like a
weird sort of
top down skating game
yeah I think I know
it's like angled
top down sort of
yeah sort of
it's like isometric
a bit
yeah yeah yeah
so you just walk
from you start in
the bottom right
of the screen
there's heaps of me if you just walk to the top left without doing anything level complete well
done well it's a nice little strong you get a short score but it's always the same yeah
complete so once again you could just you could have left at the start uh so level one level two
complete now it's uh level three final level final level it's a short game it's a
short game yeah or a long game if you do everything we all say it could be like 30 hours plus yeah
well to do zamet's level you need it's six in gate real time days so like it could be the longest
game ever made um i imagine that i'm the kind of npc you to transport from A to B. But I'm also the kind of NPC that is frustratingly hard to move.
Maybe it's the kind of thing where you have to push your player character into me,
and that shifts me forward slightly.
But the hit detection's really bad, so if you do it too hard, I pop behind you.
And occasionally, maybe it stops, and I have an inane thought that fills up the entire screen
like hey what if dog scrotums were the size of a man's head and but on a man's head but like so
like you wake up one day you can't skip out of this you wake up one day and everyone not you
but everyone around you's head is a dog balls and But you don't... You know it's balls, obviously,
but you don't know it's a dog balls
till you notice every dog has a little man's head
under their penis,
because they've swapped.
Anyway, what are we doing?
Can you see out of...
And you have, like, an option of, like, engage.
Don't engage.
Can you...
Do they see out of their dog ball heads?
Yeah, of course.
The eyes are still in there,
but, oh wait, are they?
Because they're on the dog balls,
not the real dog balls, because they've
become a head under a wiener, under a
dog wiener, which is also a kind of
dog, but you're meant to
call them dashens, calling them a wiener dog,
or, as I once did accidentally,
a penis dog, is not going to make
you popular with the owner just a full screen tech yeah it just fills off the screen and you're like
hey hey hey hey but it doesn't make it any quicker no um one thing that i also like to imagine
is that jackson uh you occasionally are like oh where are we going or what are we doing and it's
like engage don't engage and you're like oh what are we doing? And it's like engage, don't engage.
And you're like, oh, wait, is this dialogue that I have to?
You engage, you're like, where are we going?
Oh, yeah, that's good.
That reminds me of a time where I went to the beach
and I fell over and then my shorts fell down
and then my ass was out and I did a little fart.
Yeah, that was good at the beach
because that was the same day I found a crab
and I thought, what's inside a crab?
Because I didn't know. So I hit it with with a big rock but then this guy who was there who was
wearing full pants not beach pants which i thought was weird he said hey don't hit a crab like that
and i said you don't know me you don't own my behavior and he called the police on me so i went
into the sea and it hit under a jetty for about a day i like to imagine at the
beginning of the level it's like just like an empty it's like a side scroller now and it's just
empty and there's me and then the rest of the level and you go up to me and it's like engage
don't engage if you click on engage i'm like can i come you click you click yes or no and yes now
it's a transport mission no i'll be like okay and you can leave it's the same thing
but if you click yes it will take you a full 10 hours to get across the screen
assuming you click keep clicking engage because i will always have a story
i love that this game our gameplay is optional oh yeah you can finish the plumbing disaster game
it's famous among speed runners because you can finish it soummy to Death Star game It's famous among speedrunners Because you can finish it so quickly
All you have to do is walk to the left
And that's it
I like that it's walk to the left in our levels
Not to the right
They start backwards, it's upsetting to play
That's weird
Because Zammet's felt like a point and click adventure
Yours is an isometric skating game
Without a skateboard
Without a skateboard And then my level, I guess at the end you get the skateboard and can go back
dusha said he had some sick tricks he wanted to see go do them for him and then you're like oh i
guess i'm gonna go back and that makes that level make sense then but no you can just say no
um i like the idea that the transport mission takes you
back to zamammat's house
and me and Zammat are there like
why'd you bring him back
I thought I wanted to get rid of that boy
oh man
yeah I left the garage
because I thought I saw a ghost in there
but then I realised it was a big coat
my big coat that I'd hung up on the door
then I hung up the door
and put a mannequin in because
I thought that would be good. But even when I realized it wasn't a ghost, I was still scared
of ghosts. And I thought, what if one's nearby? So then I left, but it was like midnight. So I
got really lost because it was dark and I was sleepy. And that's how I ended up in my level.
Engage, don't engage.
It's like engage, don't engage. And the two of you were like, don't engage.
Don't engage, never engage.
What are you doing?
Don't engage.
Engage.
Yeah, I filled it with a mannequin because I was lonely
and I wanted to make like another guy to live in my room with me.
But then I got jealous of him and his sick coat,
but didn't want to take it off him
because that would be too intimate an experience for me.
So I just left him by the door,
but then it felt like he was blocking
my way out and i started to get angry at him even though i know he is not real so i went to sleep
which is good because i like to sleep do you like to sleep engaged don't engage either way you pick
i'm like well i don't care let me tell you about a dream i had i was at the supermarket but it was inside my dad in his guts and i could buy any one of his
bones for the price of one silver piece but then as i kept buying his bones he got more and more
deflated and i got more and more afraid and that's when i woke up and thought i saw a ghost
you click engage too many times you can never leave that's the trick it's a bug
you engaged the first time you fall um yeah and if you click don't engage what is like why have
you left us with him and then the game ends you can only get the skateboard in this game if you
go back to the first level and do all of zamet's quests but when he makes you go to the shops to buy milk if you also go to the store to buy a
skateboard yeah then you can have the skateboard and then when you go back to zamet there's the
option of give zamet skateboard that you feel like you're meant to do but actually you're not
meant to do yeah i don't want this but i guess i'll take it uh sure yes this will stop dusha
from doing those tricks and then i snap it in half, and you're like,
oh, no, did I do something wrong?
Do I have to go back to my last save?
Oh, yeah.
Are there saves in this game?
No.
Between each level.
Oh, no, not at all.
If you go, you press start, and it's got save,
and if you click save, it says,
we couldn't program a save function in this game,
just don't turn it off do drugs that's an actual piece of text not even a corruption of winners
don't do drugs i like the idea you press say it's just like you press pause and it's like
save or quit you press save and it just comes up don't engage and you're like what
what does that mean did it save don't engage and it does the noise from tony hawk's pro skater yeah when you special noise
the special noise yeah absolutely um so the way to beat the game right is that just
you you start the game press start winners do drugs you you all right sam it you just walk to
the left you walk to the left
Through Douche's Isometric Skate Park
You ignore me entirely
You don't even press A on me
Then you get to the end
And it just says congratulations
And that's it
That's the plumbing that does start the game
For the Ness
And Baker's Gate plays once again
You get to the end and it's just like Yes, and Baker Street plays once again.
You get to the end and it's just like, really, you know how you can kind of take a photograph and have it be pixelated and put into an early game, that kind of style?
It's just that of the copyright problems we're having for having Baker Street now game.
All proceeds of this is going to our lengthy legal battle with the owners of baker
street please buy more copies of plumbing the death star of the game disney also would like a
word i like the idea that no matter how you finish the game the end credits end with a picture of us
like a pixelated version of us in a jail like our sprites in jail i'm just like what were they the bad guys
why was there a difficulty meter on this game it changes nothing and it maybe it even says
enemies killed if you look at your statistics but it's always zero yeah there are no enemies
that's how it works IGN 10 out of 10
there's something for everyone
in plumbing the death star the game
game of the year I reckon
really makes you feel like plumbing the death star
you know
a love letter to bad time
really makes me feel like
I'm playing a bad video game
yeah it's good to have a video game that captures what being in a podcast is like.
Bad!
Is there a final boss?
Is there a final...
Because there's...
I feel like there needs to be a level where there's at least the three of us that you...
I mean, I know you can go back to Zamet's house at the beginning, but I like the idea
of a boss where it's...
Maybe you have several Zamet requests to complete, but also, Dushi, you're asking the player
character to do skating tricks, and I am walking up to the player character and giving them the option to
engage or not engage well all at the same time what if the the ending is you take jackson back
to zamet's house like why have you done this and then zamet's like now that we're all here
we should do this episode of a podcast and then you have to navigate through an episode of plumbing the death star as you're the guest how many dog penises do you think could fit in a log and then it just gives
you several numbers or engage several the trick is always you don't engage and i'm popping up
it kind of turns into maybe like a maze game where you have to kind of move your little avatar around
and the three of us being like, you know,
there's no option to not engage.
You just get close to proximity.
You're like, I reckon 16,
but I guess it depends how wide the log is.
And you're like, oh no, oh no, avoid, avoid.
Well, what if it's one of those games
because similar to the sports games
that used to be on the NES
where you just have to hammer A as quick as possible?
Try and move along the episode as quick as much as you can yeah yeah text bubbles are kind of overlapping each other suddenly it's all about blink 182 and then you're
like i wasn't paying attention how are we here i don't kill harry potter with a gun what happens
to jack skellington's flesh where is it
maybe it's like it's just text popping up
on the screen and you just have to click it to disappear
it as quickly as possible
to get to us who are like
it's like pop ups on a screen
once you get rid of that it's just like a pixelated version of us
around a studio table and you have to click on
each of our heads to shoot us in the head
like you click on our head
and it's like oh oh, and we die.
You just got to do that.
But the less, you know, if you're not quick enough,
the screen will just get full of text bubbles.
And then in kind of like really beautiful calligraphy writing,
it just says, and on that note, the end.
And on that note, I've been Joel.
I've been Jackson.
And I've also been Joel.
And remember, kids, And remember kids Do drugs
Do drugs
Thanks for listening
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