Pod Save America - “Trump’s message of hope and inclusion.” (LIVE from Dallas)
Episode Date: March 13, 2018House Republicans end their Russia investigation, Trump sides with the NRA on gun control, Conor Lamb eyes an upset in Pennsylvania, and Democrats look for the missing Obama voters. Then Texas State H...ouse candidate Julie Johnson joins Jon, Jon, Tommy, Dan, and Brittany live on stage in Dallas, Texas.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
John, John, before we start, I would like you to hold that sign up again.
Look at that.
Now, I want to understand what happened when you were making that sign, because it says
Luca is an angel.
Hold on, I need to send the photo.
That's my fiance.
Okay.
Thank you.
Start loose tonight.
Loose.
Hey, Dallas, what's up?
Welcome to Pod Save America.
I'm Jon Favreau.
Hey, y'all.
I'm Brittany Packnett.
I'm Jon Lovett.
I'm Tommy Detour.
I'm Dan Pfeiffer.
On the pod tonight, we'll be talking to a first-time candidate for the Texas Statehouse
who's running right here in Dallas, Julie Johnson.
We've had a wonderful tour in Texas.
This is our last stop.
Next month we'll be in Florida.
Anyone who wants to get tickets to those shows.
And we'll also be announcing new dates later this week.
Very exciting.
Ooh, a teaser.
Yeah, just a little teaser Elijah wanted me to do.
Okay, guys.
That teaser is more important than the fact that Jay-Z and Beyonce announced a tour today.
Is that?
Totally.
Just got to rank them.
We're opening for them.
I'll be selling my kidney for a ticket.
It's fine.
Yeah.
So we had some breaking news before we came on tonight.
It felt like we have to talk about it.
on tonight.
It felt like we have to talk about it.
Devin Nunes and his fellow Bozo Republicans
on the
House Intel
Committee announced tonight
that they have completed their
investigation into Russian election
interference.
And surprise, surprise
of all surprises,
they have no evidence of collusion or coordination
between Trump and Russia,
and they do not agree with the assessment
of the entire intelligence community
that Russia intervened to help Donald Trump.
Dan, your reaction to this?
Shocking news from Devin Nunes.
I am shocked.
The best way not to find something
is not to look.
Thank you.
I saw that they have not,
they didn't even interview
the people whose special counsel Robert Mueller
has indicted for crimes.
Tommy,
is that usually how it goes?
It's just so ridiculous.
First of all, Devin Nunes
has brazenly
lied to the press and the public
multiple times. He's written memos
about this investigation that have been
discredited in
the blink of an eye. And yet we still play this game where we take their report and their
assessment and we treat it like it's fact because it was put out by a committee that used to be
bipartisan and used to be serious and now is simply not. It really does amaze me, though,
that they would contradict a consensus intelligence community assessment that the Russians engaged and did so to help Trump,
given that it's very likely that the intelligence community
was looking at things like intercepted communications,
talking to spies who we pay or have coerced
into giving us information about internal Russian thinking,
or maybe they picked up the New York Times or Twitter
and they saw Donald Trump Jr.'s tweet where he said,
if your information about Hillary's emails are what I think it is, I love it.
There's a lot of ways you could decide what happened here and they chose to look at none
of them.
Bernie, what do you think?
Were you shocked?
The only thing I think is that I have chosen not to be surprised by anything that
happens in this administration whatsoever.
I don't think we can afford to be surprised anymore.
I think we have to take this very seriously.
So yeah, no shock and awe from me.
Although every once in a while, they just give me a new one.
And I'm like, oh man,
oh man, this is fun.
Love it. Are you disappointed in your friends?
I'm going to say two things.
One, I have retained the ability
to be surprised at every turn.
I'm shocked every single day.
But
every step of this process,
Devin Nunes and the Intelligence Committee
have behaved inappropriately
but also stupidly.
That their efforts to be partisan
haven't been effective because I don't think Devin Nunes
is up for this level of scheming.
He's not.
I don't know if there's any level of scheming.
No, he's got county level
schemes.
I think.
Watergate level?
He would be a devious and tough
opponent at the
city council level.
Like I couldn't fix a student council
election.
But I think this is yet again
an example of them being brazenly
partisan in a way that is not strategically
smart because
continuing to have
this investigation open is one of the
great tools they've had
to muddy the waters for
the better part of a year.
We have two substantive and quite real investigations going on.
There's the Robert Mueller special counsel investigation and then there is the still
I think legitimate Senate Intelligence Committee investigation and then there were these yahoos
in the House talking to Trump, taking meetings on the White House lawn, whatever
and this was a way, you know, Devin
Nunes and the memo, all this stuff was a way
for them to muddy the waters and they're about to kind of close
the door on that by releasing this
report and they seem to have a really
unhealthy relationship with time
because they'll release this report and they'll get
a day or two of Fox News
Sean Hannity headlines out of it but then it's
over and the world will march on
with the facts of the case in both the Senate Intelligence Committee
and the special counsel investigation.
I do not want to suggest they have a real strategy,
but having the investigation ongoing protects them.
Because when the press and others ask them about Russia,
they can say, well, we're looking into this in an investigation.
Where this could be helpful is if Trump wants to fire Mueller. Because this now gives him a piece of, this gives him a report, it's bullshit, but it gives
him a bullshit report to point at that says, look, no collusion. Why do we need Bob Mueller?
Yeah. Although now Bob Mueller has the stage all to himself. Okay. Well, we'll move on
from that.
I'd like to see Bob Mueller in a
Guys and Dolls.
It's more of a
Waiting for Godot.
That's your thing. That's good.
Square jaw.
So, if you guys remember...
I'm sorry.
I really missed you.
Yeah.
He's back, guys.
He's back.
He's back.
There we go.
There we go.
So if you guys remember, a few weeks ago,
Donald Trump held a meeting with Republican and Democratic lawmakers
where he surprised everyone by seeming to endorse
all kinds of gun control measures.
Dianne Feinstein literally jumped out of her chair.
He even accused Republican
Senator Pat Toomey of being
quote, afraid of the NRA
because Toomey's proposal
didn't include a provision to raise the
minimum purchasing age for guns
from 18 to 21.
Well, last night the White House released their gun proposals,
and guess what?
The minimum purchasing age didn't make it in,
neither did universal background checks,
neither did any kind of assault weapons ban.
Instead, the proposal focused on making modest improvements
to the current background check system
and putting more guns in the hands of teachers.
Boo indeed.
Brittany, this morning Trump said
that there just simply isn't much political support
for raising the purchasing age.
He spent two weeks
and he could not find the political support.
What do you think happened in those two weeks, Brittany?
You know, I honestly don't care what happened. Here's why. Because if we always waited for something to be politically
expedient, we'd still have slavery, we'd still have segregation, and only white landowning men
would be able to vote. It is your job to be courageous. Like, it is your job to be courageous.
Like, it is your job to create the pathway for change for the betterment of our society.
So I don't care what happened over the last two weeks.
I want people up there to do their job.
Tommy, does this sort of put an end to the whole,
you know, Donald Trump has these live televised meetings
and he's this great deal maker,
independent negotiator
and then it just doesn't
fucking matter afterwards.
Yeah, I mean, I think that
Donald Trump doesn't understand
policy and I think that he was
saying whatever he thought would get him through
that meeting at the time.
Like Brittany, I'm not at all
surprised anymore when he lets us down and
when he does the thing that is the most right-wing choice available to him at any given moment.
I think we all should be hopeful when you look at what just happened in Florida, where they made a
whole series of additional gun control laws. What did they pass? And it's not like Florida is just any state on the map.
It's a state where the NRA has dominated policymaking
at a state level in a way that is truly extraordinary
and was a petri dish for exporting horrible laws
all across the country.
And the other reason we should be hopeful
is we just met with a bunch of high school
and college students backstage.
Where are you guys?
Woo!
We just met with some students backstage who are organizing the March for Our Lives here out of Texas.
So we're hoping they would stand up.
We're hoping you guys would stand up.
That is why you should be hopeful. These guys don't care when Donald Trump forgets what he believes
or when Congress won't do anything.
They're going to keep fighting, and so we have to, too.
Yeah, well, so that brings up a good point.
I mean, you mentioned about Governor Scott.
So Florida is one of the most gun-friendly states in America. Republican is a governor, Republican legislature. The law that they passed would raise
the minimum age to purchase any firearm to 21, the thing that Donald Trump said he couldn't find any
political support for. Somehow in this deeply red Republican-controlled state, they were able to
find support for it. The law would also extend the waiting period to buy a gun to three days.
It would ban bump stocks.
It would fund more school police officers and mental health services.
It also would arm some teachers, which Rick Scott was against, and most people in Congress
are against, and most people in America are against.
So that's the bad part.
But the question is, obviously, this was not everything that the Parkland students wanted.
They wanted an assault weapons ban,
and assault weapons ban is obviously broadly politically popular.
But does anyone think that this law would have passed
if only politicians had taken the lead on this
and if these students hadn't done what they did?
I hear laughter in my ears.
And I guess, what does that say?
Where do the Parkland students go next?
Where do the students we just met with go next?
What is the next step, Dan, on gun control?
Well, it's two things.
One, it's continuing to organize at the state level,
because there are laws that can be, we don't have to wait for Congress.
We can pass things at the state and local level, the municipal level,
to make schools safer, communities safer.
And then this is all about organizing
towards the 2018 and 2020 elections
because the reason...
The reason that Congress,
after things like Parkland, after Newtown,
after gun violence happening in communities
across this country, the reason they will not do something that is popular with huge bipartisan
majorities is because they are more afraid of the people who oppose gun control laws than those who
support them. And the only way to change that view is to win the campaign on this issue and win big
at the ballot box. That is the only way to
change the political dynamic in this country. You know, I want to continue to shout out these
young people because they have to keep doing exactly what they are doing in building an
intersectional movement. And that's critically important on this issue because it's easy to just say gun control, gun control, gun control,
and not think critically about how certain measures will disproportionately affect certain communities.
So as an activist myself, I am in deep admiration of the group that just stood up because it is incredibly diverse.
And besides the fact that as a former teacher myself, I am very clear that I would rather you spend the money you're going to spend on arming teachers on actually paying teachers what they're worth.
Besides that important fact, there's research out there, very recent research that talks about the
adultification of black children. So young black girls are seen as less innocent as early as the age of five,
and black boys are seen as more adult and less innocent as early as the age of 10.
We can't forget places like South Carolina, where we saw a student be slammed against the floor at
her desk by a school police officer. We can't forget six-year-olds being dragged across the
floor in their elementary school. So I had to personally get a seven-year-old
out of handcuffs inside of a school building.
So when you think about it,
what we can't actually do is set up a system,
continue to set up a system
where black and brown children
are disproportionately punished
by people who now have more power and have a firearm.
Like, I do not want to open the newspaper one day
and hear a teacher say,
I feared for my life because Demetrius raised his hand.
We have enough research to know
that this is a terrible, terrible idea.
Lovett, what do you think?
I would just add, I think just building on that point,
I think in the same way that we have to think about
how this affects different communities,
we have to think about the different kinds of gun violence
because I think it is a very good thing
that these Parkland students have taken on this issue
because it's raised awareness
and made things like this law possible.
But we still have these three kinds of,
different kinds of gun violence in this country,
and mass shootings have the broadest appeal,
they create the broadest fear,
they touch all communities,
and so they make a bigger coalition,
and that leads to things like raising the age limit on AR-15s,
that means assault weapons, that means banning things like bump stocks. But again, still,
the largest cause of gun deaths in the country are still suicides. And after that, it's still
sort of the daily violence in communities across this country. And we still haven't built a very
strong coalition about how to fight those kinds of violence specifically. And those kinds of
shootings don't make the headlines in the exact same way.
So my hope is not that we only focus on mass shootings
because they're the only kind of killing
that touches all classes
and that elites care about
and that wealthier white communities care about
because it can hit their families too,
but that these Parkland kids become a way
we get to the other kinds of violence too.
Because I think too often, especially
on suicide, it's like, well,
yeah, this kind of prevention might only
affect suicides. But that's a really big deal.
Because I think so often we think like, oh,
it's access to guns isn't
just because people will get guns and kill more
people. Guns themselves, you know, all
these studies after studies show that
fingers pull the trigger,
but the trigger pulls the finger too.
And just guns being places causes people to take their
own lives and take other people's lives that they never
would have. They wouldn't have gone to a knife. They wouldn't have gone to another
form of violence. And so I think
that in the same way what Brittany's
talking about is important, talking about the impact of things like
guns in arming teachers, arming
whatever school officers would do. The same way we need to
talk about the other kinds of gun violence
that don't get the attention and make sure it's a bigger gun violence conversation.
Yeah.
And I'll also say, you know,
what was most inspiring about the students
we spoke to backstage is that they told us
that they are in this for the long haul.
And so they are here to organize
for the march on the 24th,
but then they're also going to organize for the march on the 24th,
but then they're also going to organize for May 5th when the NRA comes to Dallas
for their national convention.
And, you know, they said,
we want to take the spotlight away from the NRA
and we want to put it on the march
and on the protesters.
And also, and then they said,
and then the next focus we have is November.
And we're going to register people to vote and we're going to organize.
Because I think every time a mass shooting happens, and especially after Parkland,
one of the first questions is, how do we keep this in the headlines as long as possible? How
do we get the media to pay attention? And the truth is, in today's media environment, the cameras are going to go
away, and that's when the real
difficult work of organizing
begins. And it happens away from the
television cameras, and it happens on the ground,
and it happens in neighborhoods when you start
registering people to vote, and you get people to
sign up, and you look to that
next election to actually make real change.
And so that's what's really inspiring, I think.
Can I just make one point just about that too?
Which is that, I think that's absolutely
true. And the really good news
is one, one fortunate
thing because we have a president who watches television
constantly,
protesters are great on television.
And it works. And it's meant
that people are more effective than
politicians in driving news cycles now.
We've seen that over and over and over again.
That's one.
And two, one benefit of the obstinance
of Republicans in Congress
and Republicans across the country
is slowly but surely,
they're not standing against 50-40 issues.
They're now giving us 60-40 issues,
70-30 issues for us to campaign on.
Even now, the issues we're talking about,
these were less popular even six months ago.
And so their failure to kind of move with this issue
has given us something that is really popular.
And they're not moving because of their own internal politics,
but the country has moved.
Well, and the problem used to be,
yes, 80-90% of the country is for expanded background checks,
majorities are for assault weapons bans,
but those aren't the people that show up at the polls.
And those aren't people that, you know,
they're not one-issue people. They don't
vote on guns. And now we're seeing
there's a new generation of young people
who are saying, we're going to vote on this issue,
and we're going to be loud, and we're going to be noisy about it.
Yeah.
Okay.
So, tomorrow, there is
a special election in southwestern
Pennsylvania
to fill a house seat that was vacated by an anti-choice Republican
who resigned after it was revealed that he had encouraged his mistress to get an abortion,
which of course I know comes as a surprise to all of you.
So Donald Trump won this district by 20 points in 2016.
Romney won it by 17 points in 2012.
Democrats didn't even field a candidate in the last two elections.
And yet, Republicans have spent over $9 million to save this seat thus far.
President Trump has visited the district twice.
And today, the final poll on the race for Monmouth has Democrat Conor Lamb
at 51% and Republican Rick Saccone at 45%. Don't be cocky. How many times are we going to do this?
What news have you people been watching to be so hopeful?
So polling average stands at Lamb up by two and a half percent but as levit alluded to he could
easily lose he could win you know any outcome possible but if it's close which it seems like
it could be close no matter what win or lose dan what does the fact that the race has been this
close tell us about the midterms it says really good things about what can happen in November
if we keep the momentum going.
It says that all the headlines we read
and all the smug interviews we got from Paul Ryan,
that the tax cut is unpopular
because Conor Lamb has run against the tax cut plan.
It says that the ability of Trump to turn his voters out on behalf of
these reestablished Republican politicians has not happened yet. And so, and it shows that if we
organize and raise money and volunteer, we can win everywhere in the country. Because if we
were to win every district as Republican as this one, we'd have over 300 House seats.
were to win every district as Republican as this one, we'd have over
300 House seats.
Yeah.
It also says something
about the Republican message,
right? I mean, you alluded to this, Dan, but
a few weeks ago, Republicans replaced
all of their ads about the Trump tax cuts
with ads about crime
and immigration.
I like the idea that there's a big lever
that they pull from corporatism
to nationalism.
Dust off the old MS-13
ads. There is no MS-13
in this district. Doesn't fucking matter.
Get the ads out there. Someone wake up Steve Bannon
we need him again.
Racism is always so convenient.
Right, they just go right,
they're playing the old hits.
And then tonight, Rick Saccone said at his last rally
that the other side has hatred for the president,
the country, and God.
Would that be former president?
What did America-hating Conor Lamb do
before he ran for Congress?
Oh, yeah, he served in the military.
He was a Marine.
Brittany, what does this say to you
about what actually works with the Republican base
versus what Paul Ryan hopes works with the Republican base?
I mean, I'm always nervous about what seems to be working.
I wouldn't even just say with the Republican base,
but with the Trump base,
because they seem to be a special crew. I won't talk about baskets or anything, but they seem to be a special crew. I will say that I am hoping that the trend of
Donald Trump endorsing losers continues. And that this candidate meets the same fate as our friend Roy Moore.
Yeah.
So not only have Republicans dropped all of their ads about the tax cut,
some Republican groups have actually been running ads
that attack Conor Lamb from the left
for not supporting a $15 minimum wage
and being insufficiently pro-union.
Smart.
Yeah.
Evil, but smart.
What does that say about what the Republicans think of their own...
It says utter desperation.
They are absolutely desperate.
I mean, let's just remind everyone
that this district is going to get wiped away.
It's going to go away because Pennsylvania is going to redistrict.
So they're pumping $9 million into Donald Trump's ego. That's going to go away because Pennsylvania is going to redistrict. So they're pumping $9
million into Donald Trump's ego. That's the whole thing here. This is an utter waste of time for
them. And part of it is because, as some of their strategists told the New York Times, they're
worried that a whole bunch of big corporate donors, like the Chamber of Commerce and all these folks,
are going to look at this race and think,
oh boy, we better start hedging our bets and start donating to the Democratic Party on the other side. And so the desperate plays you've seen about sort of like attacking Conor Lamb for
supporting Donald Trump, like whatever thing they're going to make up next, exactly that.
I think it's because they don't have, It's a sensible thing to do, right?
They don't feel like what they're doing to drive Republicans to turn out
or to drive independents away from Conor Lamb are really working,
whether it's the attack message or the immigration message
or whatever message you're trying is working.
So, okay, why don't we depress the left
because Conor Lamb has run to the middle
to try to appeal to people in this more conservative district?
Fine.
But I think what's interesting to me is I think what's missing, right?
Like,
there are other kinds of politics on the right besides Paul Ryan, tax cuts for the rich and deregulation, and Donald Trump, MS-13 is coming to take your family, right? The thing is, that
third kind of republicanism was the thing they were going to figure out after Trump lost.
Seriously, that if Trump had lost,
Republicans right now would be in a period of soul-searching
that would have allowed them to try to figure out where they went wrong,
why Donald Trump's nationalism
and the Marco Rubio, Paul Ryan kind of corporatism,
why neither one of these was the answer.
There was already all of these Republican intellectuals
starting to write those pieces.
There were like, you know,
posed sitting in front of chairs with paper
called the Reformacons.
Remember the Reformacons?
They're in a vault.
They're in a vault eating soup
waiting for this to be over.
That sounds like the lamest Autobot
that was ever here.
So they don't have the words.
They don't have another thing to go to right now.
They have two tools,
and neither one is working.
And so they're like, I don't know, maybe we can depress some liberals,
some Bernie voters from staying away from Conor Lamb.
Look, it is a 93% white district that is largely blue-collar.
And what's clear is, besides attacks on immigration and crime,
Republicans don't seem to have a lot of compelling things to say to those
blue-collar white people
in this district that would make them vote for Republican.
They thought that maybe Donald
Trump would do something, but clearly,
two years into his presidency, a year and a half into his presidency,
he has not delivered for them.
Well, they have gone from being...
They run as a populist party,
but they're really just a racist, corporatist party.
And so... Since Donald Trump has come in, he has, he's done racist things, and he's done racist things, so check that box.
But what if they, instead of being populist, other than doing the steel tariffs thing, which is sort of fake,
what they did was try to take health care away from Americans and they gave giant tax cuts
to the rich to be paid for down the
road by cutting people's social security benefits.
But to your point, Dan,
they're losing this, but not for lack of trying.
Donald Trump damn near rushed
and started a trade war
to get in these steel tariffs to
appeal to this Pennsylvania district before
the special election. Even that's not working.
Well, because Conor Lamb said that he was for it.
Yeah.
They should have Googled that first.
And they said he was a Pelosi liberal,
and then he said he probably wouldn't vote for Pelosi
for leader, so that was a problem, too.
Go ahead, Lovett.
Sorry, no, but I would say, like,
similar to Virginia, though, I mean, look,
there is clearly a constituency for the kind of
anti-trade, anti-immigration positions
that Donald Trump has taken.
There's a constituency of people who view that as an answer
to the dislocation and uncertainty and, you know,
immiseration that people have felt in places like this district.
But what we saw in Virginia, we're seeing here,
which is it's very hard to get that onto you from Donald Trump
because people don't see Republicans as representing that.
They do see Donald Trump as representing don't see Republicans as representing that. They do see Donald Trump
as representing that, for good and for bad.
And, you know, Ralph Northam's
opponent, Ed Gillespie, whose name
I've forgotten because he's now a part
of history.
Because he reads the footnotes.
Couldn't make it work because people didn't buy it
and I think you see the same problem here. And that's why
when a guy like this gets up there and says, I don't know,
I think they hate God too.
Is that going to help?
Is that working?
You yokels, do you believe me when I say that?
Oh, shit.
You know?
But I think at this point that Lovett is making about that third,
they're asking an essential question that, quite frankly,
both parties need to be grappling with.
Because there are a lot of us out there saying,
I don't want to just be told what I'm voting against.
I want to be told what I'm voting for.
And to that third's credit, right, whether or not I agree with them politically,
what they're essentially saying is I'm not going to cast a fear-based vote. So you're going to have to give me something else. And I think that there's a lesson for both parties to learn from that.
Well, so this is a great segue into our next topic here. There was a study in the New York
Times from the weekend by some data experts and political scientists called The Missing Obama Millions that speaks to the larger issue of Democratic Party strategy in 2018 and beyond.
Basically, their analysis shows that in 2016, while 9% of Obama 2012 voters went for Trump in that election, we talk all about the Obama-Trump voters. 7% of Obama 2012 voters
stayed home in 2016, and 3% voted for a third-party candidate. And their basic argument is,
you know, we talk all the time about how to win back these Obama-Trump voters, but the Obama
non-voters, or the Obama third-party voters, basically these missing millions of Obama voters,
third party voters, basically these missing millions of Obama voters, happen to be younger,
more diverse, less wealthy, and more liberal on almost every issue. Dan, should Democrats be focused more on these missing Obama voters? Well, I'd like to read some New York Times
profiles about these people instead of the 700th profile of the Trump voters.
But I think that this is set up in some ways as a false choice which is it's not as simple as the
New York Times puts it right because it really matters where these voters are distributed right
because in some states because we don't run as we sadly know the president's not elected by who
gets the most votes right what's that? What about GDP?
That's too inside.
Some of you saw it.
A couple of you saw it.
We'll move forward.
You have to win states.
And in some states, if we're going to move Iowa or Ohio or Wisconsin or Pennsylvania back to the Democratic column,
you're going to have to get some of those Obama-Trump voters to move over.
You're also going to have to get some of those missing Obama voters to do it.
In a state like Florida or North Carolina, the difference can be in just getting people who voted for Obama and didn't vote in 16 or are aging into or didn't vote at all and profile as
Democrats. But we treat this as zero-sum, that there is one message that would be perfect for
this group and antithetical to this group. What you need is a party and a candidate with a broadly
appealing agenda, and then go explain to that, to everyone, Obama-Trump voters, Trump voters,
people who didn't vote, people who have never voted,
why it matters. And that is, I mean, that is how Barack Obama won in 2008, how he won. These are people who are Obama-Trump voters for a reason, because some of them were Bush-Obama voters.
And he had a message to that and got record turnout from African Americans, Hispanics,
young people. And so we have to get back to having a broadly appealing message that we try to sell to everyone
I also think we have to ask
ourselves
we have to start by asking ourselves
the question, why did so
many of these voters stay home
in 2016?
Was it Hillary Clinton? Was it something broader
about the Democratic Party? Was it
like Brittany, what you were just saying
that they felt like there wasn what you were just saying, that they
felt like there wasn't something to vote for, that government hadn't delivered for them? What do you
think about that? So it's fascinating to be having this conversation because people of color,
especially millennials of color, spent a lot of time in 2016 banging this drum without a lot of
people listening to us. And it was hard and frustrating
to get the result that we knew was coming when folks didn't listen to us. And I remember, you
know, I endorsed Secretary Clinton, which was a very personal choice. It wasn't terribly popular
with a lot of people, but for obvious reasons, I felt like it was necessary. And I'll never forget
sitting in a community center in North Carolina with a bunch of young people of color who were disenchanted and felt
disengaged, right? And this is part of the reason why I fell for Beto the other day.
Because what he said was, we can't judge someone's choice to not vote if we never
listened to them in the first place. And these young people we're feeling not listened to,
so we can't blame them for feeling disengaged. I think it's our job, to Dan's point, to say to
folks, look, we understand why you feel the way that you feel, and we're not here to judge you.
We are here, though, to say that there are lots of systems that are trying to suppress your vote all the time, so let's not volunteer for our own
disenfranchisement. Part of the danger of studies like that and debates like this is that political
strategists see them and think, okay, does this mean in the last month of an election we should
spend money on persuasion ads or GOTV efforts? And that can't be your calculus and that can't be your inflection
point. If you have 7% of voters who voted for Obama and didn't vote, you have to think really
hard about why they didn't do it and whether you were showing up in their communities early enough
and often enough and listening and adjusting to the things they were talking to you about.
And I think an honest reflection on the 2016 campaign
would suggest that that didn't happen.
And a lot of people didn't feel listened to
and a lot of people didn't feel represented at the polls
and a lot of people didn't feel like either choice
inspired them enough to go to the polls.
And whether that meant you didn't vote at all
or you just voted for state party tickets, but you know we failed miserably on that front yeah and we can we can
yell at those voters for saying how could you have not realized that donald trump's the most
dangerous thing to happen to the country but that doesn't help change it we actually got to change
the dynamic you know right but the good news is as people of color and young people are wont to do,
when we see that folks have not created the pathway,
we go create it for ourselves.
So, what we've seen is the
creation of things like Collective PAC, which
funds black political candidates all across
the country. Woke Vote, which is a grassroots
organization that helped Doug Jones make it
across the finish line. Voto Latino
has done a lot to deepen their efforts
in reaching millennial Latinx voters
and efforts like Wrinkle the Vote and Wakanda the Vote
to register voters at these, yeah,
that's what it's called for good reason
because everybody's going to these movies.
So why don't we engage people
and meet people where they are, to your point?
So thankfully, a lot of these folks have already gone out
and figured out a way to create this
and we should be supporting them.
I think beyond even organizing too, I you know, I'm a message person.
I'm a speechwriter first.
And I think about what we were just talking about, right,
that Republicans are trying to suppress the vote in this conservative district by getting people upset about Conor Lamb's position on the $15 minimum wage and unions.
upset about Conor Lamb's position on the $15 minimum wage and unions. And I believe that there is a story, that there is a message that works in those places and that works for people, for
younger, diverse, disenfranchised people. In part, I believe that because I think that's what Bernie
Sanders' appeal was. And I don't think Bernie Sanders was a perfect candidate, but I think you
can look at what Bernie Sanders did and you can say, there is a coalition there. There's a coalition there that
runs from the Conor Lamb districts to the more diverse and liberal and urban districts, both
places where we need to appeal to people, some of whom went to Trump and some of whom didn't turn
out at all. And I think it comes down to an argument for working people and for students
and working people that the people feel as though they're being heard,
to Brittany's point,
but that they feel as though this is something
that is our version of populism,
that doesn't appeal to people based on race,
but appeals to people based on
an old-fashioned democratic, liberal,
working-class politics
about the minimum wage, about unions,
about standing up for people against corporations and greed and lobbyists and all the rest. And I believe, I don't know the minimum wage, about unions, about standing up for people against corporations and greed
and lobbyists and all the rest. And I believe,
I don't know the words exactly, but I think there is
a story there. Well, look, I mean, this study
had this chart up. Even if you take
even if you
take Bernie Sanders out of it or Hillary
Clinton out of it, they have the chart of all the
different issues. And they have
Obama-Clinton voters, Obama-Trump voters,
and then
the obama non-voters or third party voters and the issues where they're all in closest agreement
is uh increasing the minimum wage um universal health care um help for college all of these
core economic issues and we talk about the working class in this country or especially in the media
and it's always assumed it's the white working class. But a message that targets the black working class and the Latino working class
and the white working class and everyone together seems like the more potent message.
I just think, Democrat, we've overthought some things.
It's like people want to hear, here's my set of policies that are going to help you.
Real ideas.
Real ideas, simple, elegant ideas are going to help you.
We're going to make college affordable for you.
We're going to make sure that health care is universal
and it's going to be available to everyone, including you.
We're going to raise the minimum wage for you.
I just, that to me is at least on the way back
to how we should be talking about these issues.
I think the mistake that political strategists,
political analysts, the media do is they put this
through an ideological framework. And it's like, well,
if we want the Obama-Trump voters, we have to be
moderate. And if we want the
missing Obama voters, we must be
liberal. And we are in
a post-ideological
era in politics. Look, Donald
Trump is president. Very no labels of you. Right?
Donald Trump is...
I know what you're saying.
You're going to fix the debt, Dan? I'm here tonight to endorse the Trump is president. There are no labels of you. Right? Donald Trump is... Well, what I mean by... I know what you're saying. That's very unrelated.
You're going to fix the debt, Dan?
Yes.
I am here tonight to endorse the John Kasich, John Hickenlooper ticket.
So, I am not.
Let's talk Cole Simpson.
That is such a niche joke.
Oh, my God.
But what is...
Look at our...
This is a niche group.
No, I don't think so, actually.
I think our bubble shit is falling flat.
group. No, I don't think so, actually. I think our bubble shit is falling flat.
But it is about who people are authentically going to believe is going to fight for them.
And it is not an ideological checklist of this, this, this, and this. You have to show that you have to have a broadly appealing message that you're going to stand up and fight for everyone.
And Donald Trump won by getting huge turn on my Republican voters with having a lot
of positions, none of which he stuck with, that were antithetical to right-wing conservatism
as we know it.
And so the idea that if we're just going to be like, well, we need this moderate, if we're
going to do this strategy, if we need this liberal, if we need this other strategy, it's
so one-dimensional thinking, it's painful.
It's old, too.
Yes. Look at old too. Yes.
Look at Beto.
Yes.
Beto is the perfect example.
And now for a game
we call OK Stop.
Here's how it works.
We watch a clip, and when we feel like it,
we say, okay, stop to talk about it.
This week, Donald Trump decided to head out on the hustings and bring his message of hope and inclusion to Pennsylvania.
Yeah.
Let's roll the clip.
Hey, didn't we surprise them with women during the election?
Okay, stop.
Well, he did surprise a certain number of women.
Yes, to that question.
He has surprised women at times.
And after the election as well, apparently.
Women won't like Donald Trump.
I said, have I really had that kind of a problem?
I don't think so.
But women won't like Donald Trump.
It will be a rough night for Donald Trump
because the women won't come out.
We got 52%, right?
Okay, stop.
Oh, you got it.
Hold on a second.
Yeah, go ahead.
I mean, I have some thoughts and feelings about this.
I'll just, I'll hand it off
to Brittany by noting that he says
women. He means
white women.
It's the only kind of woman
he won. That he ever recognizes.
That he recognizes and it's the only group that he won.
So listen.
Over to you.
For those who will be listening to this,
my shirt says stand with black women.
Shout out to Planned Parenthood who made this.
And let's be very clear, 94% of us knew what was up.
So.
what was up.
So,
if you are wondering which direction
you should go,
stand with Blackburn.
And I'm running
against a woman.
You know,
that's not that easy.
And Maxine Waters,
a very low IQ individual.
Okay, stop. Stop.
So as I shared with some folks, Auntie Maxine is not to be messed with.
She is from Kinloch, Missouri, which is very close to Ferguson and very close to Florissant, where I grew up.
And in St. Louis, we don't raise no punks.
So I know that Auntie Maxine has got this handled for herself. But what I will say is that it's
amazing that he would start off by saying women love Donald Trump and then proceed to attack not
one, not two, but three, not three, but four women in the course of this speech. But since you hate
women so much, DJT, you can hate watch us walk to the polls in 2018 and 2020
and get rid of you and your friends.
Ever see her? You ever seen her? You ever see her? We will impeach him. We will impeach the president. But he hasn't done anything wrong.
It doesn't matter.
We will impeach him.
She's a low IQ individual.
Okay, stop.
I pointed out what I thought was fairly obvious the other day,
that that is a racist remark,
that he has decided to go to Pennsylvania
and single out a congresswoman,
a black congresswoman,
a black congresswoman from California to call her low IQ.
The conservatives are very upset about this today.
Ben Shapiro and all the right-wing nuts on Twitter,
they have made this their whole thing today,
that they are very upset.
He made fun of all kinds of women,
not just Maxine Waters.
That was one.
The other one is is she is dumb.
She has not said anything about Donald Trump
since October.
He decided on a random Saturday night to go to a
rally in Pennsylvania and talk
about one congresswoman from California
who happens to be African-American.
I wonder why.
I'd say two things about this. One, I've done a really good job
at muting because I follow your Twitter really carefully and I have no
idea this happened.
Yeah, I didn't know the whole thing. One, I've done a really good job at muting because I follow your Twitter really carefully and I have no idea this happened. Yeah, I didn't know the whole thing.
Two, their best
response is, he's a race
blind misogynist.
That was it. That was the best thing.
This is an aside,
but
you set up a
game of checkers.
You put Maxine Waters on one side
and Donald Trump on the other side.
And you tell me
I have to pick a winner.
And if I get it wrong,
I fall down a well
that has no bottom.
I'm going to be standing behind Maxine, I think.
Pretty sure.
The smart choice.
The only way
to solve the drug problem
is through toughness. Remember
this. If somebody goes and shoots somebody
or kills somebody,
they go away for life and they can even get the
death penalty, right? One person.
You kill 5,000 people
with drugs because you're smuggling them
in and you're making a lot of money and people are dying and they don't even put you in jail.
They don't do anything.
Okay, stop.
You kill a million people with carbon pollution.
Thirsty.
Real quick, which drug dealers should we kill?
Real quick, which drug dealers should we kill?
Is it the ones that get the stuff in illegally from other places or the ones in pharma
that are paying off doctors
to prescribe their bullshit to people with a toothache?
How did we both make the same pandery point
about corporations right one after another?
I smoked it.
Mine was much better received.
Luca is an angel, you know.
I wonder why we have a problem.
That's why we have a problem, folks.
And I don't think we should play games.
Now, I never did polling on that.
I don't know if that's popular. I don't know if that's
popular. I don't know if that's
unpopular. Probably you'll have
some people that say, oh, that's not nice.
I think it's a discussion we have to
start thinking about.
I didn't poll mass murder
without any due process.
I don't know if anyone thinks that's
a good idea, but we should consider
killing those we disagree with. Mind you, I don't know if anyone thinks that's a good idea, but we should consider killing those we disagree with.
Mind you...
I don't know what the public thinks,
but I know what the cast of Fox & Friends thinks.
And they're in.
Mind you, he just justified rolling back
these ideas about gun control
based on the idea that there was no political support for them.
So you got to pick a side, Donnie. Pick a side,nie. Figure it out. I don't know if you're ready. I don't know if this
country's ready for it. But I think, Rick, I think it's a discussion that we have to start thinking
about. Is Trump a good speaker? She's talking about he uses a language that, you know, you know
how easy, remember I used to tell how easy it is to be presidential? But you'd all be out of here right now.
You'd be so bored.
And she's writing like I'm some kind of a Neanderthal.
And I'm saying, you know, I'm really smart.
Okay, stop.
A, it's amazing when people write the truth.
B, every single time I ever see him on screen,
I cannot stop looking at his toupee.
It's just so dusty.
It's distracting.
Brittany, Brittany, I'm sorry.
I let it go the first time.
That is not a toupee.
That is a complicated, overlapping...
Whatever nest that is, I can't...
We've talked about this.
I believe it is a very long...
It is an elaborate comb-over.
It starts in the back.
It comes up.
It goes around and forward and back.
I'm just saying,
I don't know how Bill O'Reilly
can have something to say
about Maxine Waters' hair and not that.
I don't get it.
We can't be like they are.
We have to be better.
You're right. You're right, John. We have to admit that that isn have to be better. You're right.
We have to admit that that isn't a toupee.
It's the world's most insane and elaborate
home over, maybe with some
additional weave in there.
I think hair might be woven into it.
This is why he should stand with black women,
because we can hook that weave up far better.
That's a really good point.
In the same way...
I just want him to live his best life.
I agree. In the same way that Ben Carson
alienating gay people is why he ended up
with an interior decorating scandal,
Donald Trump alienating
black women is why
his hair is so bad.
Yes, John!
I know I liked you for a reason.
I don't know
if I'm a good speaker,
but you know what?
Every time I have
a 25,000 seat stadium,
we fill it up,
so something has to,
it has to be right.
Maybe it's just pure ideas.
I don't know.
Maybe it's just pure ideas.
It's not ideas.
The thing that's amazing
about this is,
this,
we have like three minutes here.
We left so much shit on the cutting room floor.
He had the attack of Oprah,
called the moderator to meet the price of son of a bitch.
Was it a sleeping incident?
I'll tell you what we didn't leave on the cutting room floor.
Any time where he was talking about Rick Saccone,
the candidate he went to campaign for.
Didn't really mention him.
I love that this is a two and a half hour
rambling thing that culminates in
Hey, I'm right here.
Anyway, kill
the drug dealers. I'm pretty great. I could fill
any stadium. Here's some stadiums I've filled up.
Tix office stadiums. Ladies and gentlemen,
Rick Saccone.
When we
come back, we'll have an interview with
Texas Statehouse candidate Julie Johnson.
Julie Johnson is an attorney and small business owner who is also a first-time candidate running to represent the 115th district in the Texas Statehouse right here in Dallas-Fort Worth area.
Please welcome to the stage Julie Johnson.
Thank you so much. Nice to meet you.
Thanks for being here.
Look at this rad jacket and these boots.
Come through.
Yes.
I know.
You're in Texas.
You've got to get some boots on.
Yeah.
I need to work on it.
I messed up that.
Okay.
You are a successful attorney, a small business owner.
Right.
Why did you decide to run now?
Why, after watching the 2016 election, which was politics at its worst,
what motivated you to get in the game now?
Well, you know, I was totally depressed after the election, quite honestly.
You know, I went to Washington to watch the first woman become
president, and I didn't get to see it. We still wait, girl. You know, I was just, yeah, I'm waiting.
And, you know, interestingly, I have two teenage sons, and I was like, I'm staying home. I can't
go. I'm going to lay in bed with a cocktail and the covers over my head. And Nicholas is like,
you know, Mama, I have the opportunity to see history,
good, bad, or otherwise, and I want to go.
I'm like, well, how can I resist that?
So we went, and instead we went to the Holocaust Museum
that afternoon.
I wanted them to see what messages of hate meant
and the impact that they have.
That's right.
And because so many of the messages coming out of the Trump
campaign and the presidency were, at the campaign at that time, were just so divisive and mean
spirited and hateful. And what does that look like when leaders of countries do that?
It was very enlightening for my kids. And then we went to the Women's March the next day.
do that. It was very enlightening for my kids. And then we went to the Women's March the next day.
And yeah, you know, I'm there. My sister did these dissent. It's not just loyalty t-shirts. We're there just raising it. And my arm in arm with just over a million people. It was one of
the most powerful moments of my life. And they kept saying, get involved, get involved, do your part. And I thought, you know what? I can do that. I'm
going to get involved. I'm going to have, I have my voice. I can do it. And so I came back,
thought about it, molded over, talked to a lot of friends, got pushed and poked a little bit
and realized after this past legislative session in Texas what a hot mess it was.
Yeah.
You know?
That, exactly.
It was that we had to do better.
And the guy that I am trying to kick out of office
deserves to go.
And we needed a strong candidate to do that.
So we need to fire Matt Rinaldi and elect Julie.
I really appreciate you sharing that story because you decided to do what I like to call practicing courage, right? You didn't have it all figured
out. You put one foot in front of the other and got to work. And you stand alongside a lot of
other women and other folks in the LGBTQIA community who have decided to do the same right
now. So what does it mean to you to be a part of this wave of brand-new candidates
who are coming from marginalized identities and trying to actually change things around?
Well, you know, it's really exciting.
And the thing for me was, you know, here I am.
I'm out.
I'm running in Dallas, Texas.
Some might think it's a conservative area of North Texas.
And I beat a straight white guy by 54 points.
Show them how it's done.
Yes.
So, woo!
Bring it on, man, you know.
And, you know, I think to your point, when you just live your authentic self and realize that we have more in common than we have in uncommon.
Just like that Maya Angelou commercial that was there. We are more alike than we are unalike.
And I think just sharing our common humanity. I mean, I'm a working mother of two teenage sons.
You know, I can relate to families in North Texas I understand what that means
and you know as part of um being of the LGBT community I'm really excited because we have
Mary Gonzalez we have Cecilia Urzel now we have Jessica Gonzalez I'm so excited about that and I
hope to be the fourth so we can have a card game. Yes. Yes. Please invite me to that card game.
That's right.
Play some Texas Hold'em.
Your folks were public school teachers.
Yeah.
What do you think about some of these incredible students
who are organizing for more gun control measures?
What do you think about the policies we should be pushing for
and proposals to arm teachers like your parents? I think arming teachers is one of the most insane
things I've ever heard. I mean, seriously. You know, I think there was an article I read about
this whole debate. This is like our highly skilled trained, you know, personnel
only shoots 31% accuracy. Imagine the teachers. I mean, when you're incoming, you know, it's like,
it's the stupidest thing ever. And, you know, what we need to do is really, we need to keep our kids
safe. You know, the thing that was really troubling to me is after the Florida shootings, you know, my son's high school, they had safety drill.
You know, and now all of these high school kids across the country are going through safety drills at school afraid.
What do we do?
Where do we go?
Teachers are afraid.
You know, we've got to, there are a lot of measures that can be taken,
but we've got to keep our kids safe.
We've got to stop gun violence.
We need to address the mental health crisis.
They get more mental health care after they're in prison than before they go to get there,
which is also insane.
It's just not right.
And speaking of keeping young people safe, especially here in Texas,
I'm thinking of Dreamers and young immigrant children
who, in the face of SB4,
many of them came together to protest outside the Texas state legislature,
and your opponent called ice on them.
Yes, he did.
Really excellent choice there.
Yes.
Because clearly it got you riled up, which I'm
glad for. But as you think about protecting young people, especially young immigrant people,
how do you want to actually approach that if you're elected? Well, you know, I think the fact
that Rinaldi called ICE on all of the protesters demonstrated why that bill needs to be immediately
reversed and that it's propensity for racial profiling. You know, the fact that he assumed that just because you are there protesting
a discriminatory bill, holding a sign that all of a sudden you must be illegal and that you need to
be deported. It was, it's just horrible. And, and what it's doing in fear to young families, you
know, I think I saw a video the other day
where they came and they took a mother, they took a baby out of the mother's arms and left the kid
and with other children and just took the mother away. You know, families are being destroyed by
this. And, you know, it's people like Matt Rinaldi who have got to go. You know, Cruz has to go.
Rinaldi who have got to go. You know, Cruz has to go. Rinaldi's got to go. Abbott's got to go.
Patrick has got to go. It all spells one word and it's all got to go. Yeah. I'd much rather than be deported. I'm fine with that. I'm fine with that too. You know, uh, I think Matt Rinaldi
needs to be out of job and have to rely on zip recruiter, but unfortunately I don't think his
credentials are going to be very good.
All right. Broke some news. Not endorsing Ted Cruz. Got it. Okay.
So this is our fourth stop in Texas. The energy we have seen in this state has been incredible. We've done Pod Save America shows in like 30 cities,
and I thought the roof was going to cave in in Austin
because people were going nuts.
What is it that's happening in Texas this time,
and how can you help explain to folks in D.C.
or elsewhere in the country who might be listening
who aren't in Texas, what's happening
and why Texas could go blue this time around? Well, I think there's just, I think there's the
collective energy. And I do think there's that of people who are so frustrated finding their voice
and seeing their friends find their voice. And it helps them find their voice. You know, so
more women came out in this past election.
That was wonderful to see.
And it was awesome because I was out there on election day in our primary, poll greeting and greeting everybody,
and so many women came by to me.
You go, girl. We got this. We got this.
And talking about issues that are important.
The thing that concerns me a little bit, however, is still the young vote.
You know, in the primary, only 11% of the vote this past Tuesday was the young millennial vote.
And we've got to do better at that.
We really need to get people out.
And we're struggling to figure out how to do that.
People are talking now. They're posting. They're struggling to figure out how to do that. People are talking now.
They're posting. They're coming to events like this. But what we really need is engagement.
And we need people to come volunteer. We have a wonderful array of state candidates in Dallas
this time. And we need people to volunteer in our campaigns. You know, you were talking earlier
about, you know, engagement and reaching people. You people. When we were door knocking, we had people.
I remember I talked to this couple.
They had been Democrats for 40 years, and I was the first Democrat to ever knock on their door.
Wow.
I mean, seriously.
And that happened all over this district.
And we need people to get out and say, hi, I need you.
This process, our democracy, is important to me. That's why I'm out here you. This process, our democracy is important to me. That's
why I'm out here walking and I need it to be important to you. And I'm asking you to come vote.
And when that personal ask makes all the difference. And so we need everyone in this room
to come volunteer with one of our local campaigns. Come out, march.
If they wanted to volunteer for you, what do they do?
Oh, well, they come to Julie Johnson for Texas, for sure.
That's my website.
And Facebook and Twitter is Julie Johnson Texas.
But we need people to vote.
We need people to volunteer.
And we need people to support money, too, though.
I mean, we have, one of the problems is we have all these statehouse candidates.
We have several here in the office, in the audience tonight.
And that who need funding.
And we need, if people just did
15 bucks a month 25 bucks a month you know a lunch out and donate it to a local state house
candidate it would make all the difference in the world we've got to improve the candidate pipeline
we have to build from the ground up we've got to build our state legislators
you know if we don't start at the legislative level, we're never going to make the
progress. That's right. Because we have gerrymandered districts. You know, my district looks like drunk
people were doing Etch-A-Sketch. Seriously, because it goes and it goes and then there's this thing,
it's like, oh, that's when they drank a beer, you know, up and down and all around. And our districts
are a hot mess.
But we can't fix that until we've got to make improvements in our statehouse so that we can fix our gender-married districts in 2020.
So we've got work to do.
Girl, we've got work to do.
We've got work to do.
Let me ask you this.
You are running this race.
You're out here knocking on these doors.
You're spending all this time and energy, time away from your family to do this. What keeps you hopeful and what should we continue
to rest our hope in? You know, I think democracy and the right thing keeps you hopeful. You know,
when you're fighting for fairness for everyone, when you're fighting for ideals and principles that elevate us all, it's easy to keep going. And, you know,
and I have two sons and I want a better life for them. I want them to grow up and to have
opportunities. I want, I see other friends and who struggle to pay for college and going through
the whole college application process for my senior son, OMG.
You know, it's enough to make you crazy because this generation is the largest yet.
But we are not creating as many college opportunities.
And so the competition is fiercer. And, you know, we're going to have some problems if we don't really focus on graduate education and our high schools and things like that.
Our education system needs a lot of attention,
and that's something that really motivates me.
Julie Johnson, thank you so much for being here.
Thank you for firing these guys up.
Woo!
And we're back!
Tonight we're going to play a game that's a little bit different.
Tonight, we're going to take you on a journey.
tonight we're going to take you on a journey.
Tonight
we are going to the future.
The year is
2120 and almost
nothing is the same.
The sea levels are higher, the world is hotter,
they've run out of Star Wars characters to spin off
and after
2,312 seasons
The Bachelor was finally cancelled for being
too Christian and old-fashioned.
But there has been one constant over the
century to come, and that's this.
Ted Cruz is run for president
every four years.
Without exceptions.
That's right, twice every
decade, Senator Ted Cruz leaves the state
of Texas to shake hands with Iowans and South Carolinians
who come to the same conclusion every four years.
No thank you.
But he won't stop.
It's all he knows.
And so tonight we'd like to quiz you about this future history in a game we call
Ted Cruz 2120.
in a game we call Ted Cruz 2120.
Would anyone out there like to play the game?
Travis is out there somewhere.
Hi.
Hi, what's your name?
Susan Miller, no relations, A+, or C+, Santa Monica fashion.
Susan, I want you to know that the name Miller is so common
that the connection
didn't occur to us.
It was Susan? Susan, yes.
Are you from Dallas?
Originally from Indiana.
But you live in Dallas now. Yes.
Great. Then you're from Dallas.
Okay.
So honest.
Just think, we're the pro-immigrant party,
and then everyone's like,
you weren't born in Philadelphia.
Get the fuck out of here.
I want a native Philadelphian.
You know, that kind of thing we hear,
and we don't like it.
Yeah, it's not good.
Susan. Yes. Are you familiar with the future history of Ted Cruz? You don't like it. Yeah. It's not good. Susan. Yes.
Are you familiar with the future history of Ted
Cruz? You can't possibly be. Why are you?
How did you nod?
It's fine. We're going to
ask you some questions. Okay. And you'll
try to figure out the answer. Alright.
Okay? Based on your knowledge of Ted
Cruz, figure out what his future
might be. Okay. Okay?
You guys all have your cards?
Do you have your cards?
I'm just reading.
Sure do.
They're good.
Question number one, Susan.
After a devastating loss in the 2056 presidential election
to the second woman president, Blue Ivy Carter,
who followed President Nancy Pelosi 2.0,
the clone of Nancy Pelosi created by the Center for American Progress.
Senator Ted Cruz announced his number one priority would be what?
Was it A.
Filibustering a bill in the Senate supported by 99 of his fellow colleagues
to pump out the water that filled Disney World after half of Florida sank into the ocean.
Was it B?
To oppose a bill that pays for tax cuts for humans
by raising taxes on corporations and billionaire robots.
Or was it C?
To download his consciousness into a younger but still same-shaped body
in order to begin preparations for a presidential run in 2060.
I'm going to go with A.
No.
All of a sudden?
It's C, Susan.
Owen won.
Susan, question number two.
After being defeated in the 2018 Senate re-election
by then-Congressman Beto O'Rourke,
by a very narrow margin,
which only underscored just how important it had been for every single person to do whatever they could to help Beto O'Rourke, by a very narrow margin, which only underscored just how important it had been
for every single person to do whatever they could to help Beto.
How did Ted Cruz end up back in the Senate?
Was it A?
After a period of soul-searching, Cruz emerged wiser, more humble, more open.
He threw away the talking points,
his habit of being almost pathologically on message,
and spoke from his somehow growing heart. He threw away the talking points, his habit of being almost pathologically on message,
and spoke from his somehow growing heart.
In a speech applauded by Republicans and even some Democrats,
Cruz rejected the nationalism of Trump and the corporatism of Ryan and McConnell and defined a new way of being a Republican.
He primary John Cornyn, won, and then returned to the Senate to focus on governing
and his main concern,
children's health care.
Or was it B?
His daughter became governor and appointed him to senator after a scandal involving bribes at the Alamo
caused a seat to open up.
B.
Yeah, yeah, it's B.
Yeah.
These have right answers.
Question three, Susan.
You're doing great.
You're batting 500.
Which of the following candidates outperformed Ted Cruz in the
2072 Iowa Straw Poll?
Was it A.
Donald Trump III.
No relation.
Was it B. Marco Rumbio, a carpet-cleaning robot without any principles based on the consciousness of Marco Rubio.
Was it C. Republican Derek Favreau, John's estranged right-wing son.
Or was it D?
All of the above.
All of the above.
You got it.
You got it.
Susan, you're two out of three.
Your final question.
Question number four.
During a 2032 presidential primary debate
moderated by Jesse Waters and an AR-15,
a joint broadcast by Sinclair and Coke TV,
the only TV channel you can't cancel
because it's inside your eyes.
How did...
How did Ted Cruz respond to a question
about why he always runs for president
and never actually serves the people of Texas?
Was it A?
Maybe because I was never liked
and have been called names my whole life.
I have this chip on my shoulder
that can only come off if I win the ultimate likability contest, no matter the cost. Was it B? Or maybe
I'm broken. There's a hole that cannot be filled and I cannot accept the job of senator as enough
because I imagine that this pinnacle, this job that is unequivocally the top president will fill
that void because I know with certainty that there is nothing else.
Or is it C?
Or maybe I don't know why I do it.
And you can be genuinely brilliant,
become a senator, and run for president.
Answer question after question without ever really having
to examine why you have chosen this enormous
grueling path that you will likely
never succeed in.
Or is it D? I just really, really
care about cutting corporate taxes.
D.
No, I'm sorry, it was C.
All right.
Two out of four.
You guys want to give the tie to Susan?
Susan, you have won
Ted Cruz 2120 and the parachute gift card.
Guys, give it up for Susan Miller, no relation.
We will leave it on that high note.
Thank you, Dallas.
Thank you, Julie Johnson, for joining us.
You guys have been wonderful.
Thank you, guys. Thank you, Julie Johnson, for joining us. You guys have been wonderful. Thank you, guys.
Thank you. Bye.