Quick Question with Soren and Daniel - QQ ep 10 - Quick Question with Soren and Daniel

Episode Date: July 30, 2019

Hello again and welcome to another episode of Quick Question with Soren and Daniel. This is the podcast where two best friends get together once a week to answer all of life's questions except the important ones which we leave to the philosophers. That's it. That's it's a short intro this week. I just thought it's good though. It's like a tight yeah it seems nice right a tight 20. I liked it. Yeah uh I am Daniel. I'm one half of this podcast, Daniel O'Brien. I am joined, as always, by Soren Bui, who sounds like this. Go. Hi, this is Soren Bui.

I feel really, this is a good start because we're also off the hook for anything big. We leave that to the philosophers. Yeah. We only have to talk about the mundane shit, and that feels really nice. That's my lane. Which is why i i i mean i like our lane very much but i do want to put the philosophers on blast when was the last time a mainstream philosopher really like nailed it really really got something right um

kant i want to say when he was like space time when he was like talking about space time and how it could be shaped like an hourglass he kind of nailed it there but we can all agree that they have really been pulling their weight no give them a lot of slack uh yeah they have not i don't know what they're doing right now because i haven't heard anything in the news speaking of people who hang around but don't really do much who do we got there in the studio, Soren? Our CFO. That was a little too smooth, Dan. Did you write that down before? Our CFO, Michael Schroer, a.k.a. Bacon Bits.

Bacon Bits. That's so much worse. That is bad. Dan, lots of philosophy majors. Not a lot of philosophers. Something's happening. You're going to have to retract what you said earlier, Dan. Yeah.

I believe our old boss was a philosophy major. Is that right? Yeah. Did Jack O'Brien study philosophy? I think he's religious studies. Maybe you're right. Religious studies? Yeah, maybe he was philosophy.

Aren't they kind of the same thing? I don't know oh well that's uh we uh we have two semesters of interns at our show every year and at the end of their semesters when they they leave having fulfilled their internship or whatever um they get to meet with different groups like they meet with uh my boss is john tim and liz and they meet with production and they meet with us the writers and they get to go around asking questions of us and before all that they go and like introduce themselves and like i go to this school i'm studying this and one of them is studying at like a fancy school in new york it might be nyu but i i can't remember because

they're all fancy now uh and he's double majoring in comedy and religion. Oh, Jesus. Which is a thing you can do now, I suppose. Wait. I couldn't even like major in writing. Right. I'm shocked that you can major in comedy. Yeah, that's absurd to me.

I mean, good for them, I guess. I don't know if you got money, whatever. Yeah. Anyway, this show is Quick Question. If you got money, whatever. Anyway, this show is Quick Question, and it is always Quick Question, and it has always been Quick Question with Soren and Daniel, and our loyal listeners

are, of course, known by their famous, clever nickname, which Bacon will provide right now. Bacon, hit it. Yes. Hit it. Crispy quesadillas. That's hit it. Yes. Hit it. Crispy quesadillas. That's not bad.

That's not bad. Boom! No, but is the... So the crispy part, is that a play on crispy quesadillas? Yeah. It's crispy quesadillas. Both cubes. What are crispy quesadillas?

Is that just like with fried chicken? No, it's like a griddle. It's like a griddle-made quesadilla. This motherfucker lives in New York. He doesn't know anything about Mexican food. It's crispy quesadillas. It's just a little crispy on the outside. You snap it and it gives a little snap to it.

I thought I was out of the woods on that one, Dan. I didn't have any other guns in the bullet. Oh my God. Our last episode was so much tighter. Immediately, this is off the rails. I love it. We're going to talk about a lot of things today. We're going to talk about football.

We're going to talk about the internet. We're going to surprise each other with questions that we have not discussed in advance. But before all that, we'd like to pay a little bit of tribute to our listeners who, God bless you, rate and review this show. This is a review from someone whose name is Score459. That's S-K-O-R-459. They gave us five stars on iTunes. Thank you so much for doing that.

This review made me laugh. Quick question with Soren and Daniel. Is an excellent opportunity to feel like a fly on the wall listening in on a genuine conversation between two best friends and their CFO. Yeah, nailed it. Yeah, one of those conversations that we're all familiar with.

This episode, I feel like I've come in hot throwing bacon under the bus, but I love you, buddy. I think you're great. How you doing? What's new with you? Thanks, Dan. I'm doing good. Have you guys seen this show? I'm looking for a replacement show for British Bake Off and Que bunch of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.

They're both very relaxing shows. Have you guys seen the show about competitive glass blowing on Netflix? No, that sounds incredible. It is wild. I feel like they're 10 out of 10 running out of things to compete against because I don't even know how they find that many glass blowers that have a competitive attitude. Let me see if I can guess the title of it.

Is it called Blow by Blow? Is it called Kick Glass? I don't even know the title. I stopped. I just started. I only click on things now because they were presented to me. Right. We're going to land on it by the end.

I know it. And do you like it do you feel like it's as um soothing and pleasant as british bake-off where like the the competition element is not very cutthroat no i think it's not that i i didn't i don't know if i'm gonna come back to it it was uh okay i need the the uh like soothing uh nature of people complimenting each other a lot yeah in their competitions and it's not that yeah just people shining on each other yeah i really appreciate that in both those shows as well i heard uh master chef junior is a fantastic version of that so i might uh supplement it with that blown away blown away i should have done that

that's my fault throw up soren um i'll tell you i've watched the master chef junior and while it's they're very complimentary of the children it's also feels very synthetic like it's clear that they're giving these kids stuff to say in their little one-on-ones with the camera and uh it that takes away from it i've been been really enjoying Family Food Fight on ABC, maybe. It's Ayesha Curry's new reality show where it's just a cooking show, but it's families. That's the entire gimmick to it. It's this Greek family versus this deep in the heart of Texas family,

and you get your cooking challenges, same as any other show and you compete and you do it. And, uh, I'm in love with it. I think I, I got a way into it because I don't watch a lot of reality shows. And my way into this one was the,

uh, restaurant that I go to often that is near my apartment. I don't want to name it because it's too near and people will find where I live and I don't like that. But the people who run the restaurant are on the show and they filmed it last year and now it's on. So we go to the restaurant to watch them on this show and it's very fun. And it's a reminder that every piece of reality television has always been insanely watchable. stopped listening do you really think that there are people who are going to come try and find you to listen to this podcast

i mean the the listener the listeners of this podcast yeah i do those die hard crispy i never even occurred to me that that was a possibility. I guess I'm not, it's not like a real fear. This is, I wonder if this is even worth telling because it's, do you care if I talk about something that might be like slightly scary and not fun? Like it's fun, but it's also uncomfortable. Yeah, absolutely. Please. Okay.

There's, I've been in my head about this for most of this year Yeah, absolutely. Please. there was no second date to it. And this will pretty much make clear why, is that one of the things that she told me after the date was that she knew who I was from my crack.com days. She knew me as a writer performer for the website. And she also knew that I moved to New York because she followed me on Twitter and saw that I got this job and was going to be here and then she specifically got on a bunch of different dating websites and apps to try to match with me and and find me and withheld all of this information from me. And so we're having our very early conversations on Bumble, I believe it was. And I'm like, hey, I'm a writer.

She's like, where do you write? And I told her the show and the job. And she, the whole time, was like, oh, that sounds very interesting. What a neat show. And we're having very basic first date conversations. We're like, before I did this, I worked for Cracked. She's like, oh, that sounds very interesting. What a neat show. And we're having like very basic first date conversations. We're like, before I did this, I worked for Cracked. She's like, oh, what's Cracked? She played dumb.

She acted like she didn't know any of the things that she very clearly knew because she was presenting this, I don't know, very strange situation that felt, I like that eventually she felt comfortable enough that she could tell me the truth but I still felt very uncomfortable that

she was sort of lying to me for all of our early conversations. Oh, that's so creepy. That she's sitting there being like, crack, what's that? I've never heard of it. Last week's night with John Oliver, that's so creepy. That she's sitting there and be like, crack, what's that? I've never heard of it. Last week's night with John Oliver. Tell me about that.

And in the meantime, she knew exactly what it was and she like knows people that I worked with which made me so uncomfortable in retrospect that it's really stuck in my head. It's not a thing that like,

we're, Soren, we are not famous. This podcast is not a famous podcast and i'm very aware of that i i always feel safe when i wander around the world i'm not looking over my shoulder or anything like that but there's just a slight bit of a guard up whoa yeah obviously that's this situation that's wow that's very unnerving um i there they're so frequently i'm i feel thankful that i never have to enter the dating world i mean i'm assuming i'm assuming we don't ever get divorced that's yeah it was not really a thought on the table but it's so terrifying to me that that could happen especially when you have kind of

like a motocross success because then you've got people who are interested in the same job as you or interested in also doing a career like yours. And you even if that their intent is not to not to use you as a foothold, it's still a power dynamic that's not healthy. If you go on a date with that person like like you're that's a really problematic situation it is on the end and because my brain is broken in a particular way uh there's one part of me that that understands the romance of that idea you know in the same way that i think we talked about this in a previous episode where i i felt like did we talk about this in a previous episode where I felt like... Did we talk about my crush on Avril Lavigne in our episode about crushes?

No. Oh, man. When I, in high school, had a huge crush on Avril Lavigne, and it was different from normal childhood crushes. Where it's like, oh, yeah, we're all in love with Sarah Michelle Gellar. We all think Pamela Anderson is hot. We all think Stacey Dash is perfect. Avril Lavigne was one where I was like, I think I might have a shot with her.

I'm kind of a skater boy. She's the best person in the world. She's a musician. I'm learning bass guitar. We're close in age. I feel like there's a chance that our paths will cross or that I'll be a famous bass player in a couple years and someone will ask me who do you want to meet and i'll bashfully say avril lavigne and then

that'll get to her people and then i'll meet her there's like a room like i understand the romance of that that like hopelessly romantic idea of like i maybe if i just if i position myself in the right place and i line myself up with the universe our paths will cross because i really feel like this person who i don't know who is a stranger to me i really feel like we would connect and that's how i was with avril levine and i i guess i'm the avril levine to this person from Bumble. I don't know. Yeah. Okay. No, that actually makes a lot of sense. Okay.

It's, it's less terrifying, but also just like the way that she handled it is very unnerving. Yeah. That she sat there and let you talk about yourself. I felt really stupid afterwards. There's a, a point in the,

in the Ted Bundy tapes where he's, we're definitely losing one listener where he's, he's on trial and, uh, and he's representing himself. And he asked the witness who's a cop. He's like, you got to describe the scene in the sorority of all these women.

And it's like the cop describes the first room. He's like, uh-huh. And then what happened? What happened when you went to the next room? And he keeps asking for more details about it. Cause that's, what's getting him off at the moment even in a courtroom where he's

presumably a lawyer he's listening to what he's done previously and like all the terrible things that have happened and that's what's like selling him on being a serial killer and uh i feel like that's what you've got a situation here dan where she's she wants to hear you talk about yourself and tell you the story of you which is really really an uncomfortable thing to want to listen to yeah i mean just because uh because it's unfair that she's not here and can't like plead her own version of this case i i don't want to throw her under the bus too much because i i do believe she's just like she's a an enthusiastic and happily happy and like romantic person. And I,

as someone who's like romantically got caught up in the past and like builds on builds stories in my head of like, this will be a fun story to tell 10 years from now to our kids. I understand where she's coming from. I understand the impulse of like, yeah. Trying to construct a romantic narrative. Uh, and I just hope she finds that with someone else.

Yeah. Yeah. That didn't work because it was, it ended up being scary for me. Yeah. There's Jesus Christ. There's, this is a hard story to navigate.

I knew I shouldn't have talked to that. No, no, no, this is great. I, you look, you're not the bad guy here, Dan.

And she's not the bad guy either. You've really done a good job of explaining how this sort of scenario could come about with a normal, rational person. I shouldn't have brought up Ted Bundy. This is my fault. But, you know, if you find an organic and natural way to bring up Ted Bundy, as you often do, then you do it. Soren, I got a quick question for you, unless you got any more on this. No, go ahead. You know, Ted Bundy, he was in Aspen for a long time.

He escaped into the mountains for a while. Six days, in fact. This is another, I'm ignoring that. This is another, this might get dark and sad. Quick question. Do you still enjoy football? We've had a number of things. We've got CTE, the problem that, the reason that a lot of football players end up with addictions and committing suicide and committing violent murders that we've seen over the last many years because they get traumatic brain injuries that it's, we haven't, science hasn't figured out a way to detect it early or detect it currently. So we only know that it exists after a football player has died, usually tragically.

It's enough that like, I wouldn't let my kids play football because I know that it could lead to CTE. It could lead to this horrible brain injury. We've got that. We've got all of the racial problems in the NFL, the reasons that Colin Kaepernick kneels and doesn't have a job right now. We've got pay imbalance between football players and cheerleaders,

and we've got just an industry that is not good. No one says a single good thing about the NFL as an industry. You get these great publicity moves about the, oh, we wear pink in October for breast cancer awareness, and we do these videos about how you shouldn't, how domestic abuse is bad, but they're not really linked to any charities that actively lead to any meaningful good. So that is a very long winded way of saying that there are plenty of good, objective, inarguable reasons to not support football anymore in its current state. Having said that, we both grew up watching football and it was important in your life with your family. So what do you do? What do you, are you a football fan now at this point?

Yeah, I am. I'm still a football fan. It's, I just live with the cognitive dissonance of it. Um, I just accept that. What, what is that? Is that parrots that I'm hearing? That's not on my end. Can I just keep talking?

I mean, unless the parrots have something to say. I just live with the cognitive dissonance of it. I, and, and try not to think too much about it. There's so many reasons. You're right. There's so many reasons not to like it. And all the news that comes out is always bad. I mean,

recently there's the tree kill stuff where tells his wife that she should be afraid of him. He broke his son's arm. Maybe like there. And that he's still on the team. There's no, there's not gonna be any repercussions from the NFL. But,

and it's, and then on the other end of that, you've got players who are suspended for entire seasons or kicked out of the NFL for like marijuana use. And so like, it's all this arbitrary thing that, that no one has any sort of, there's the only person at the top doesn't really know what he's doing as far as how to punish players. And then there's all the other horrifying stuff like CTE. And I know all of it. I'm aware of all of it. And I still watch football. And not only that, I play fantasy football, which feels even worse because you're commodifying players

in a way where you're kind of, it forces you to root for certain players to get injured even. I mean, if you've got somebody's handcuff, which means that you've got the running back, who's under the current, like starting running back. Right. And you're not doing, you're not having a great season. Part of you is rooting for that,

that person at the top to get hurt, which makes you feel really terrible about yourself. Yeah. And every single year I play fantasy at the end, I'm like, I don't, I can't do this anymore. And then the next season I do it again. And this season i still check in on what's going on the broncos training camp

i'm excited about the news in it my dad and i talk about that when we get on the phone my brother and i that's what we talk about and uh there's there's so much history and nostalgia tied up in it i'm sure that we if we worked at it we could find other things to talk about but we don't and that this is our thing this is like what connects us. And I genuinely like it. I like watching it. I like the sport. And if people want to play it,

I have to just sort of live with this part of me. That's like, well, they know what they're getting into. Right. And they don't always, that's like, they don't know.

And, uh, so yeah, I'm still a fan. What about you? It's,. They don't, no. And so, yeah, I'm still a fan. What about you? It's, well, this is, I'm going to need like you to give me like a moral, morality check on this because I stopped watching football, I think two years ago now, two seasons back where I'm just like, no, I'm not going to do it.

It used to be a regular part of my life. It was, we would often watch football together. We would get together with coworkers on Sundays and just spend an entire day watching games. And then a few years ago, I was just like, no, I'm not going to do this anymore. There's a nagging voice in the back of my mind that is letting me know I would not be doing this if the

Giants were better and I it's like I don't think it's a coincidence that my brave decision to boycott football coincides with the worst time in my favorite teams career yeah but I mean it makes like like when a year ago and in my favorite team's career. Yeah. But I mean, it makes it easy for you. Like when a year ago, and they were like, we're going to have Eli Manning be our quarterback. We're going to stand behind him.

We're going to trade Odell Beckham because we believe in Eli. And it was like, listen, everybody, CTE is real and it's bad. And we don't pay the cheerleaders enough. Why are we all still paying attention to this? What are we doing, everybody? Look, all our teams suck now.

I mean, every single one of them is bad. Football's not even good anymore. And Tom Coughlin's gone. Right. I'd like to think that I would still have this stance, even if the Giants were great, but I don't think I'm strong enough to do that. I think I would find some way to be like

yeah i understand that football is problematic i donate to these charities to try to offset that and i'm vocal on my social media platforms but i would if if the giants were fucking tearing it up i'd be watching every sunday i'd have season tickets i'm on the east coast now there's no way around it. Yeah. As soon as I found out there was a stadium going in in Los Angeles and that Los Angeles was getting two teams, one of them's in the division of the Broncos, I was pumped. And that's last year. So it's like I've made my bed. I have just got to come to terms with the fact that football is going to be something that I enjoy every single fall when it comes around.

And that's just life, I guess. I don't know. I can't say no to it. What are you going to do with your son regarding football? Except from playing. I don't imagine you'll encourage him to play. But your experience with football, are you going to turn him into a Broncos fan? Yeah, I think so.

I think I'll make him a Broncos fan. I also have a plan for him for playing. Which is... Which is... I mean, he's not going to be the biggest guy. Neither my wife nor I are super tall or big enough to be of NFL stock. Okay.

And so he's not going to be huge, but I think that if I could make punting sexy to him, like punting, this is something that he would really get into and be good at. Nobody just lives that life. Nobody lives the life going, growing up thinking I'm going to be a punter someday. That's something you sort of fall into along the way.

It's the safest position in football. It pays a lot. You do it until you're like 45. It pays a lot? It pays, yeah. It pays a lot if you're a good punter. Relative to other positions or just like standard? You're a football player, so you're making a lot of money.

Standard, you're a starting football player. Yeah. So those contracts. And punting, it's not easy. So there's the Colquitt brothers who played for a long time and both of them grew up to be punters and i'm like yes that's the strategy that dad was smart do you i don't mean to put you on the spot but that's absolutely what i'm going to do uh do you what is your plan for making punting sexy to your child um hi um hire hire some of his classmates that are girls to come and watch and cheer him on man i i didn't think i was handing you a shovel that was gonna get you that

deep in i don't i don't know i don't have a plan yet for how to make that look good other than like success if he's if i can prove to him that no one else is doing this and that uh you can have success there and that you you will be embraced by the team because that's other things like sports provides such a fundamental like a fundamental camaraderie that you don't get anywhere else and i guess there are kids that grew up with that with that and they're fine but i had it and I liked it and I think he should have it. It doesn't have to be football. So, Aaron, do you know, do children's leagues punt?

Do they have that position? Because it seems like it's a dangerous thing because they got rid of like kickoffs and all that stuff. Right, because of open field tackles and the return. I don't know. I don't know. If they don't, even better because no kids are ever getting this practice. Come out of left field as nationally ranked punter.

He's going to get to college and all of a sudden everyone's going to be like, where the fuck did this kid come from? He's never played a day of football in his life. Dan, I have a quick question for you and I'm going to actually put you on blast here with it oh no okay on the last podcast you talked a little bit about how you at one point were really into making clocks like that was your hobby and for your birthday one year i gave you

a clock that you could build did you ever build that fucking clock not yet i'm so sorry i knew it i knew it's a very nice it's a very nice clock set well uh in my defense you didn't give me every the the kit does not contain everything that i need to make that clock oh shit and there are are pieces that i feel like are beyond me in terms of going to a store and asking for it. Cause like I took out the instructions. It's a very intricate, it's a beautiful,

uh, wooden, intricate dragon themed clock. It's, uh, probably two and a half feet tall. Big dragon. I look at it all the time.

It's amazing. And I took out the instructions and the instructions. It's, it's one of those things where it's like, it's, this isn't Ikea. These instructions were written by the person who conceived of this clock by hand. And they expect you to be an expert clockmaker, which I am not. And one of the things that are like, this has most of the stuff that you're going to need, but you should go to like a Home Depot or a Lowe's. You're going to need to get four lead bits. Period. You need it.

Just like lumps of cylindrical metal that I need to pick up somewhere. And I'm too embarrassed to ask for it. One day, one day I will. Maybe in December, I'll have like an entire month off and I'll go to a Home Depot and be like, the man from this instruction says I need bits. Can you help me, please? But I'm too embarrassed as of now to ask for the things that I need. Yeah, the clock is for everyone listening.

The clock is a it's like a grown up Lego set. Like it would be the hardest Lego you'd ever had to make. But you basically puncture the wood out of pre-cut sheets. So you might even I don't know if you can even get those out without a jigsaw, but, uh, there's, it's a hard clock to make,

but you were in the, you were so in the zone with making clocks that I thought, well, then the ultimate clock, this will give him, this is a new hobby that he can practice and be good at. Dan, if I know you,

this is a, this president was a real burden on you. It was, it was a very good present. And, and, uh, I, I want to look, I'm not the winner here because I didn't build the clock yet, but I still want to dig myself out of this hole a little bit because I did keep this clock with me. Like it's one of the rare things that moved with me from Los Angeles to New York. And I really want to stress how important that is because almost nothing made that move with me. Because I was moving while recovering from a broken wrist surgery. So it was much easier to throw out so much shit.

I threw out everything. I came to New York with almost nothing. I had to buy all new furniture, all new everything. But I was like, I'm going to keep this clock. So many of your possessions are scattered across Baker. Yeah, yeah. Or Barstow. They're all on the side of the road in Baker next to the world's largest thermometer that doesn't work.

But I still kept this fucking clock that I'm going to make one day. I'm actually pretty impressed that you took it with you. I am too. One of the best bits about our show is that I think we reference, unless I'm mistaken, we reference stuff that we did in all of our test episodes that I don't think we ever

talked about in the released episodes. People should know that we did like seven of these before we released a single one. There's very good episode where uh i talk about the story where my car broke down in baker california and soren gives me advice and it's it's it's so funny and uh you're never gonna hear it and i don't feel like telling it every sorry yeah well i i'll give you a little bit of news about your looming present, Dan. I guess we can call it that. Impending.

Oh, is this fucking Chekhov's present again? Yes. Okay, great. This is for first-time listeners. Soren got me a birthday present nine weeks ago. I don't know. Something crazy like that. Longer than that.

No, this is before your actual birthday, Dan, which everyone should know roughly eight or nine months ago. Sure. And I had conceived of this before your birthday, but it takes a very long time to make. And I checked in with the guy who's making it, and he gave me some schematics. schematics like it's a gave me the schematics just so that i could look them over and get like a rough sense of what it was gonna the final product was gonna look like and so much farther away from knowing what this present might be and it's i'm pretty excited about it it looks like it's gonna be perfect this was a present let me try to do my own timeline of my bizarre hobbies. This is somewhere, but this is after clocks, but before fishing.

Like you got the present before you found out that I was in my heart. A fisherman. Always a deep sea fisherman. Yes. What was I into between clocks and fishing? It's not golf related either. Biking? It's not golf related? Is it biking fish? It's not golf related either. Biking? It's not golf related?

Is it biking related? It's not biking related. This is something timeless, Dan. I think you're really going to appreciate it. And it's going to be another, I mean, I'm going to warn you now, somewhat of a burden present. I don't know where you're going to put it. I'm very excited like it can't be my dog is still alive so it can't be that you had him taxidermied

i had him made into one of those gems you can wear well is that the the most update i can get out of uh yeah i checked in it looks like it's going well but i mean i'm i'm It looks like it's going well, but I mean, I'm not entirely confident it's going to be done by your next birthday. Um, I, I think it will be,

I can, I'm going to check in again and see a timeframe from him. Cause he said that around April, he thought it would be done and it's nowhere near done. Okay. Let me ask you a question. Uh, your guy,

where does he live in LA? Hmm. But I don't communicate with him on by the phone or text or anything. We communicate exclusively on Twitter. Very fascinating. Okay. I might be getting closer. I think I might have a vague idea.

Okay. Is it twine art yeah man is it really no it's not twin art i don't i don't want you and i don't want you to keep guessing because i don't want you to land on it before it comes okay all right uh well i had a quick question for you but oh oh this might be that's the as you all know that's the theme music that announces our very popular game that we keep doing on this show

called okay hold on where I read something your delivery was too good on okay hold on. Where I read something. Wait, okay. I didn't realize the game. Your delivery was too good on Okay, Hold On that it didn't register as a title for me. The name of our famous game is Okay, Hold On.

I, as a person who lives on the internet all day, every day, am well-versed in it. I'm going to explain something to Soren, who has a job and a house and a wife and a child and he's gonna say okay hold on whenever i get to something that he doesn't understand does everyone understand the rules of the game yeah okay okay so soren here's the thing i love games by the way i'm very excited yeah any chance for me to win something this is a tweet that i'm going to read you bell delphine said if she got hold on do you know who bell delphine is yeah oh boy you do not no okay belle delphine said if she got 1 million likes on insta photo

she'd start a point hold on i don't know what is insta photo a part of instagram uh no just like a photo on instagram that's called an insta photo it uh it can be, yes. Oh, okay. Okay. I'm immediately very happy with how this is shaping up. Do you have any questions so far about Belle Delphine? Yeah, I'd like to know who she is. Okay. She is a cosplayer and model. She gained a lot of notoriety for posting videos and photographs of herself performing the Hagawa face. What is that? This is a thing that I had to look up when I was learning about this

a little while ago. I just read in like the Know Your Mean page that she was famous for making the Hagawa face. And before clicking on it, I was like, is this going to be a sex thing? And then I clicked on it and immediately the link says, warning, this page contains material that may be considered not safe for work. It is a face that is popular in Japanese hentai comics in which the character, usually female, is shown during sexual intercourse an intense amount of pleasure, translated by a facial expression that is normally cross-eyed

or eyes looking up into the sky with your tongue out. Yeah, I'm looking at it now. It's like an ecstasy face. Yeah. Why are these women so sweaty? What? I'm looking at it, and all these women are making the face. Are also just like...

No, never mind. I just answered my own question. I know why they're dripping. Okay, so now you know who Belle Delphine is and why she's famous. So let's start from the beginning. Belle Delphine said if she got 1 million likes on InstaPhoto, she'd start a porn hub. Nearly 2 million thirsty teen boys liked it. She made a porn hub, but it's just a video of her playing with stuffed cats.

And now every teenage memer on insta is having a meltdown wait hold on i don't know what i don't think i know what a memer is oh just person who makes memes okay memes is like it's been a while since you worked on the internet memes is uh is it content now it Is it everything now? It's just everything. It's everything now, yeah. It's, okay. People are just making memes and like reactions to memes and I don't know, like three layer deep memes. So like TikTok, if I made a TikTok

video, would that be a meme? No. Making a TikTok video wouldn't be a meme but you, Jesus, how do I explain I mean I know what memes were at one point but you could do

like a TikTok video that you made could be a meme it just isn't immediately and inherently a meme okay I mean I remember what memes were it was like that impact bold font you've got a picture and that's it that was a meme for a very long time. And everyone's using the same picture, but they're adding their own joke to it.

Their own impact font joke. Yeah. It's not that anymore. It's bigger. No, it's not that anymore. It's bigger than that. There are a lot of different subcategories of memes. If you and I wanted to start writing comedy professionally and use the Internet as a platform to launch us into it

we would be making memes today shit oh man sucks right no it's great that i had my day in the sun and now i can just retire aren't we trying to launch content on the internet yeah should we be making memes uh soren would it surprise you to know that uh bell delphine was kicked off instagram yeah well she made a pornhub she made a pornhub channel right yeah but like as a prank okay she told a bunch of told a bunch of people on instagram uh because she does like a lot of risque photos. She does that orgasm face, but she also also does a lot of photos where it's just her with electrical tape taped over her nipples. And she told people, if you if this gets a million likes, I'll make a porn hub. And people assume that meant that she would finally go naked yeah finally is is

not my word it's their word and instead she pranked them she's like this is like like her porn up was littered with normal safe for work videos that she would do otherwise like playing with stuffed cats and and then instagram saw that and was like ah you promised and they kicked her off instagram wasn't mad the teen boys who follow her were mad because they were like i thought i was i i like this yeah the memers oh so they weren't they i thought she was i was finally gonna see her do sex stuff and she didn't so i'm gonna report her to instagram oh so they reported her they flagged her oh shit yeah so the other reason she was flagged is uh she offered, not offered, she successfully said, I'm going to sell my used bathwater to people who want to buy it.

I have heard that. I've heard about this. You've heard of this? I've heard, I remember there being a woman who was selling bathwater, but it was like snake oil bathwater. It wasn't even really bathwater. Right. That's what we found out is that people, and I don't know if this is apocryphal or not, but someone on Reddit was like, I bought this bath water and I'm a chemist and I understand

that when a human takes a bath, they leave genetic materials behind. So I had this water tested. No one took a bath in this this is fake we should sue her oh my god i hate the internet so much i know that and that's what it is now it's just and they're so they think they feel like their lives are ruined because she wouldn't get naked yep and sold them fake bath water it's like i'm living in a different dimension i feel like 2019 everybody's so much more aware of everything And then every once in a while I check in on the Horde and it's like oh these fuckers haven't learned anything

Right and I bring this up because My actual question to you. When did you if you felt like? Pop culture left you behind when did you feel like that happened because this was this is pretty close for me. I pride myself on being someone who when did you feel like that happened? Because this was, this was pretty close for me. I pride myself on being someone who knows what's going on in the internet. And I especially like digging into mysteries so I can explain them to other people. But when I first saw the tweet that was just retweeted onto my timeline, Belle Delphine said if she got 1 million likes on Insta photo, she'd start a porn hub. Nearly 2 million thirsty teen boys liked it.

She made a porn hub, but it's just a video of her playing with stuffed cats. And now every teenage memer on Insta is having a meltdown. I was very close to being like, the world isn't for me anymore. I'm okay not knowing this. Ultimately, I decide I'm not okay not knowing it and I needed to know it. But, you know, give me a month. Yeah, if you feel you give me a month. Yeah. If you feel you're on the precipice of something,

of giving up retiring those numbers up on the wall. Yeah. I, I, you know, this, I don't, hopefully this, this is taken in like as, as flattery and not, not anything else, but there, when you're in a relationship, like when you're married, you sometimes- I know what relationships are, Soren. You sometimes, you just outsource certain parts of your brain that you don't feel like you need

anymore. The other person becomes responsible for your blindnesses, basically. They take on the role of like, okay, well, you're clearly not good at this or you're not willing to deal with it. I'll do this. And you do it tacitly and you don't really say it. I think this also happens with friendship somewhat because I've noticed since you and I have been friends, I've gotten way, way worse about just knowing things in general. I've gotten worse about knowing people's names and movies,

the names of movies, um, different songs. I don't, I haven't even heard the song old town road. I know the song exists. I know it's on the radio all the time, but somehow it just has not even entered my peripheries.

Even I have not listened to the, I'm an old town virgin. And, uh, I, I think that the time that I really felt it the most that I was like, you don't know that old town road is a huge hit from soundcloud rapper. Lil Nas X.

It is. Yeah. I thought, I thought Miley Cyrus' dad did it. It's a collaboration with Miley Cyrus' dad. So he's a SoundCloud rapper who became famous because he was trying to get his song on a lot of TikTok memes. Like he would stay up late at night trying to get people to listen to his song on TikTok.ok and that kind of worked and then he became like a number one billboard star on uh all charts and then specifically got kicked off the country charts because billboard was like we don't think this song is country and a lot of people believed oh there's some there's a racist element to that yeah and so he went on twitter and he was like, Billy Ray Cyrus, help me out. You're pretty country.

Can you. Will you guest on this song like a remix of Old Town Road? And Billy Ray did it because famously he had a country billboard hit that was kicked off the billboard. Similarly, because they were like no this is not country this is too rock and roll so billy ray was like i'm your hucklebearer and joined him on this remix and then they made it to the country billboard charts again that's a pretty happy story and now lil nas x seems to be doing that with everybody he just tweets at people and he's like hey dolly parton will you do a remix of old town

road with me and she's like yeah sure so we just now there have been like four remixes of old town road from lil nas x oh i didn't even realize there were a bunch of iterations of it i thought that oh yeah and billy ray cyrus just hashed it out one day when they were hanging out no he did it first i and like if i'm speaking heart to heart the song blows but that's a good story is little naz is he part of the crew with little zan and uh no he's i mean like he's he's you still lump him in with them because he's a soundcloud rapper uh but no he's not they're not like okay together okay I also think that Lil Nas X is one of the, probably the biggest out mainstream rappers right now.

But someone fact check me on that. I mean, don't, because I don't care, but I'm pretty sure that this is huge for the LGBTQ community. Oh, well, that's great. Yeah, it's true. Too bad his song that's great. Yeah, it's true. Too bad his song sucks, huh? Yeah, his song sucks. And like, Soren, when do you think he was born?

Okay, let me do some reverse engineering here. SoundCloud rapper. Yeah, 2002. 1999, he's older. Wow, a veteran. Yeah. Yeah, I think it was was music it was music for me certainly when when k-pop came out and k-pop became very popular here in the united states that's where i was finally like you know what i i have my music i've got my collection and just like hugged my my mini discs i, I was at a

shop on Canal Street that had a bunch of BTS themed body suits and I was like, I think the youth are taking over. I think it's time for me to go. You seeing that

and then kind of looking around for maybe the police is a really funny image in my mind. Excuse me. you, you seeing that and then kind of looking around for maybe the police. Excuse me. I think the youth might be taking over. This is a not for me. So I want it to go away. Uh, that's great.

Well, I think we're out of time, Dan. Are we? Okay. Uh, you don't have any questions for me or anything? No, I asked you about your clock.

Yeah. Yeah. But I mean, I don't want to leave you feeling like you're unsatisfied. I had a great time. Oh, that's good. Yeah. This was fun for me. Me too. Is this good? Is this, I guess, maybe like if you're in the audience, us and like do you like this is this good should we keep doing this i don't know that would be very helpful surely someone will read that right like we're not us but someone will read that yeah i imagine people google have access to it yeah i like doing this i i genuinely enjoy having these conversations and uh sharing them with the

the world but like it'll take one person to say you can stop and then i'll stop but i like that game a lot i'd like to play that more okay yeah we'll do that yeah do you remember the name of the game uh wait what nope oh okay wait what nope it's okay hold on okay hold on all right i'm gonna write that down i think uh all right well since we're ending our show i want to do the outros but while i find that information i just wanted to give dan you a platform here for one of your beliefs you at two o'clock the other morning, you sent me a text that said, phrenology is a science we shouldn't have given up on so quickly. Do you just want to speak to that?

Yeah, I want to speak to it a little bit just because I don't think there's any science that we should give up on. You know, like there's so many different kinds of sciences and phrenology which uh i only know from the roots album is underappreciated and needs to be explored more it's a really good answer thanks dan uh okay uh as always you can follow daniel on twitter you can follow him at dob underscore inc you can follow me on twitter as well at soren underscore ltd or our cfo michael sroar aka bacon bits you can follow him at make me bacon please and please is spelled pls it's all one word uh you can also follow this podcast at qq underscore soren and dan surely at some point we'll post something

there you can follow you can email us qq with soren and daniel at gmail.com i see why that's confusing because it's daniel and not dan and it makes a big difference i'm sure there's a lot of emails going to nowhere you know what it doesn't actually make a big difference because all the emails are going to nowhere. I might have a great one for this. When you're talking about our Twitter and how we don't post a lot. Yesterday we posted

hey, Quappy Quelpers. Bacon, we're going to talk about that. Hey, Quappy Quelpers, heads up that this week's ep will be a bit delayed, so stay tuned. 49 likes. You hate to see it.

What were you aiming for? Happy helpers? I, uh, yeah. Oh, okay. But not in a good way.

I didn't do a good job of that. That's fine. Twitter's a place to throw away jokes. Uh, you can follow us on Instagram, QQ with, oh no, let's start over. QQ underscore with underscore Soren underscore and underscore Daniel. That's and spelled out, not an ampersand.

Is that the sign? Yeah. And you really did your best with that, didn't you? You want to make the mistake with that one earlier rather than later. It's a real downer. You can also find or follow and uh hire our producer and our sound engineer and our editor vincent at silicon beach podcast.com oh we also have a patreon which you can support us with it's a patreon backslash quick question send us money

i mean we'll we'll fucking use it i mean not on adding to the quality of this podcast but we'll use it for like food and stuff i will maybe start doing sound effects if i if we get enough money so i can have a soundboard that feels like wacky morning i do kind of like that a lot if that was our our thing we did the zoo hour but whenever people wanted to listen to it we have a game already i you know this is i feel like we have a real direction now with this podcast yeah just in time thanks dan all right bye thanks