Regulation Podcast - Andrew's MVP 2 Powerpoint

Episode Date: December 3, 2022

Get your banana wipes ready, here is your primer for MVP 2 as presented by Andrew Panton. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is a Rooster Teeth production. Hello and welcome to another piece of supplemental content for the F*** Face Podcast. My name is Jeff Ramsey. With me, as always, Andrew Pant and Gavin Free. Somewhere in the back, Eric and Nick, I believe, are hanging out. podcast my name is jeff ramsey with me as always andrew pant and gavin free somewhere somewhere in the back eric and nick i believe are hanging out and uh i'm excited about this one uh fellows because this this recording is uh nine approximately nine months in the making i would say somewhere around there how many times we rescheduled this uh at least six eric how many times have we rescheduled this uh yeah i think. Eric, how many times have we rescheduled this? I think everyone got at least

two in where we rescheduled it. Gavin might only be responsible for one, but I don't remember. No, I'm one. I was gonna be quiet. I only rescheduled once. I'm not giving Gavin the one. He did not have that. That's good. He was gonna be quiet. Well, I'm gonna be honest and say

I'm two or three, and I don't feel like I was the worst offender. I think I'm two. Yeah. At least six, based off that. Guardless, I will say this. We recorded the latest episode of F*** Face yesterday. I believe it was 127. And after it, we realized this was on the calendar,

and everybody wanted to record the monkey movie today, except for Andrew. So we didn't let him reschedule it, but he did try. He did try yesterday to say, let's keep the recording slop or record more face instead. I suspect that's because the 98% that he said he had, uh, that he was done on the presentation was more like 8%.

And now that you're yawning, it makes me think you pulled an all nighter. No, I, it was done by the time that happened. Sorry. I want this show to release every single week it's supposed to. And Gavin previously said, we better be ready by the end of October

because he's out all of November, which isn't the case. It's not the case at all. So it's not my fault. It's not my fault that I was just going based off of what I was told and I was concerned about the listeners being able to get the show. I apologize for prioritizing their entertainment. You're a freaking doc, dude. You've got like

four incompatible apps. You've got two question marks. The doc is going to be great. The doc is fantastic. I would hate to see what your desktop looks like. Oh, you want to see? I think we've seen that before. You want to see what it looks like right now?

Minimize this, please. Yeah, we're going... Dropping out of that, dropping out of that. Oh, that's not terrible. Nah, it's pretty... Yeah, I can rearrange it. Is that a picture of your fingers? I don't know what that was.

Oh, that was me complaining about a break shit and what the feed was for me and what my perspective was. I was trying to be like, this is... Is that a... Quality of head. Is that a picture of Vancouver Island where you live? No, I don't know what that is. It's just the standard Mac

thing. Okay. Okay, so now that we're an indeterminate amount of time into the supplemental content, I realize we haven't said what it is. What we're going to be doing is this is going to be content in two parts. We've been talking about watching the movie MVP 2 for a very long time. We're is going to be content in two parts. We've been talking about watching the movie MVP 2 for a very

long time. We're finally going to do it. It's about a monkey. That's about as much as we know. Highly influential to Andrew as a child. But before we wanted to watch MVP 2, Gavin and I felt like we needed a primer on MVP 1 because we don't want to be lost in the weeds trying to catch

up on old storylines. So Andrew, the first piece of this content, Andrew's going to give us his recitation, his distilled summary of what MVP 1 was all about. Andrew? Yeah, this is an important lead-in. The doc has been made. I'm excited to share this with you.

This is going to just go over kind of the broad strokes of the movie because I realized while re-watching this to gather these images, the second movie has little to nothing to do with the first movie. So we don't need this? No, it's completely pointless. You're really gaining no additional information from this experience.

The movie ends in a completely different spot than the second one begins. We get right into the middle of the action. So would you say MVP 2 is more of like a soft reboot kind of like evil dead to evil dead 2 kind of thing i would say so but i haven't watched mvp2 since i was probably 10 and i'm terrified that it's going to be a boring terrible movie and that this was just all around well and would this be presented in dubox uh No, I should have. I should have went through.

Yeah, that's on me. That's my failing. No worries. No worries. Yeah, that's on me. So should we begin this presentation of MVP? I believe this movie came out 98. That could be wrong.

I'm sorry. Real quick. If you're listening to this and you want to see Andrew's slideshow, go to the face YouTube in the video version of the supplemental piece of content will be Andrew's full slideshow. Just wanted to let everyone know what was going on. Looks like a movie came out in 2000, by the way. Okay, 2000, great.

If you guys have any questions or want to interject, feel free, interrupt at any time. Wherever you're going, you better believe American Express will be right there with you. Heading for adventure? We'll help you breeze through security. Meeting friends a world away? You can use your travel credit. Squeezing every drop

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Terms apply. But we shall begin with MVP, most valuable primate, a presentation by me, Andrew Panton. On to slide number two. But before that, banana wipe. Look at all the bananas. Bananas coming down. Bananas falling. On to slide number two Look out oh, it's coming through let's go through Cream that banana life damn hard no the tech wasn't there. I was limited with what can be done. That's the best way to win. We got. But here we begin the motion picture with Jack. It's the story of Jack.

And you may be wondering, is it minor league fan Jack? No, it's not. Is it famous Jack Blackjack? No, it's not him either. Maybe it's Jack Johnson who did make a monkey movie. But it's not this monkey movie. It's this story. It's about Jack.

This monkey. That's Jack. He sleeps in a college he lays in bed he's very comfortable uh is he a shadow we can't is he a chimpanzee he's a chimpanzee yeah we're not gonna judge about the drool and you may be wondering what does Jack like Jack likes 90s decor you can see a lot of Godzilla in there It was probably around the time that came out Jack also really likes hockey. It's big hockey guides in his room He's got Gretzky there. He also enjoys Coffee see Jack mug and his best friend doctor. Well not his best friend, but his co-worker. Dr. Kendall Jack Jack also really is a big air drying guy like Jeff He loves to air dry he's super into it

Jack loves being oh, I forgot. This is a whole slide. No my apologies other notable actors Dave Thomas You may be thinking wow from Wendy's nah different Dave Thomas not You may be thinking, wow, from Wendy's? Nah, different Dave Thomas. Not related in any way. Next slide. He didn't even show a picture of him. Jack loves college.

So he's there. It's like they study him. They do research. He's a big fan of college, mainly because his best friend Darren's there. He loves Darren. Darren is a janitor at the school. They're best buds. They hang out.

And that's his coworker, Dr. Kendall, who you previously saw a mug for. The mug guy. Yeah. Yeah, he's like a researcher who does this study with Jack showing how intelligent he is. And they do it in front of kids. It's a whole thing. We should make Dr. Kendall mugs. We can do this thing.

Jack also super into rollerblading, loves to help Darren clean up the school. They ride around and they do classes. The kids love them. They do all sorts of things. But here's Dr. Kindle at home. So they have their big class and then Dr. Kindle

is at home because this is Jack's final year at the school. He's going to arrange to send Jack back to his reserve which is I believe called El Simeon and he's final year at the school. He's gonna arrange to send Jack back to his reserve, which is, I believe, called El Simeon, and he's reminiscing about the past. But then tragedy, tragedy strikes. Dr. Kendall spills his milk. It falls, it hits the floor, it's tragic.

Also, he is dead. Dr. Kendall has died. He's no longer with us. We'll have to make an in-memoriam mug. And the saddest part of all of this, nobody told Jack. He showed up to work. He's like, where's Dr. Kendall?

He's really sad. Because Dr. Kendall is now dead. Oh no, bad guys! The bad guy showed up. That's the head of the school. He's a bad guy. He has a British accent. You don't really learn all that much about him.

He's got a white suit. You can tell he's a bad guy. They're there to take Jack away. They're like, what are we going to do with Jack now that he's gone? And he's like, I'm going to sell Jack to a hepatitis research facility. And they'll test on Jack. But Darren's here to save the day oh shit I clicked too quick that's a double click the janitor like fucking Sam Fisher sneaks by holds the wall listens in

and he's like we're gonna sell him to hepatitis and then that's his face when he's like oh no hepatitis is bad Jack we might believe the guy in the white suit can't see that mop. Yeah, you are. So then Darren is like, we got to get the fuck out of here, Jack. So he throws Jack in a big bag and they go to the train station. And he's like, be quiet, Jack. I'm putting you on this train back to your home. So then he throws Jack on the train and Jack pokes his head out to see what's up because he's heading

back to the El Simeon Reserve which is right there. You see that? El Simeon. That's where he's from. That's where his family is. That's where he's trying to go to. Go here, Jack! El Simeon! Meanwhile, in Nelson, Canada,

we are introduced to Steven and his sister, Tara. Steven is a big hockey guy. He's from California. They just moved to Nelson. They've got a team in Nelson, Canada called the Nuggets,

which Blue from Old School is their biggest fan. He loves them. He's a big, big Nuggets guy. Loves the team. Steven, being this hot import from California, you mix the Nuggets and the potential of Steven as an elite hockey player,

and you get eggs, because they suck. They're the worst team in the league. They get thrown eggs at. Everything's bad. They're a terrible team. They're just awful in every way. So they suck, but Steven's on the Nuggets.

But uh-oh, there's another issue that's not your stop jack he slept through the train he missed his stop he's now in nelson canada and he's walking around he's just trying to figure things out a little bit uh he moves through he doesn't know where go, but that treehouse sure looks cozy. Why didn't Darren go with him? Because he has to continue working. He has a real job. He works at the school. He just didn't want Jack to be sold and potentially killed in a research project.

But the treehouse looks cozy. He climbs up it. He makes his home. He's just living his life. He's cozy. Everything is great. And maybe the best thing about Nelson is that the kids have bananas. It's a great place to live. Jack is really, really enjoying the new environment.

So he reaches, he grabs the banana. This is, that's Tara's banana. Well, they're watching Steven play hockey and you know, first meetings are often tricky. So she notices the banana move.

She's like, what's going on with this banana? Jack's like, hey, what's up? My name's Jack. I like hockey and 90s decor. And she does not take this well. She is very alarmed by seeing this. And Jack knows to get the fuck out. He just runs.

He books it. He goes back into the woods. He heads back to the treehouse. I like that we can see the previous screenshot in that new screenshot. Sometimes it happens. You get a little two for one. Two for the price of one. Some of these. You're taking them too quickly. Well, you know,

this movie moves quickly, Gavin. You gotta keep up with it or else you get held to pass. First meetings are tricky, but often they are worth it because they become friends. She follows them to the tree house. They're now buds. Jack is a hockey guy as previously established.

He loves hockey. So when they get him on the ice, they're like, whoa, look at you. You're doing hockey stuff. He's skating around. He's playing in the net.

He slapshots the puck. He hits it so hard. It goes through the net. That's how good his slapshot is. Going through the net. So then he's like, you know what? I want to play for the puck. He hits it so hard, it goes through the net. That's how good his slap shot is. Going through the net. So then, he's like, you know what? I want to play for the team. So he walks into the facility, throws some gear on,

hops over the boards into the ice, grabs the puck, scores the goal, gets out, leaves. Shows up, scores, leaves. Everyone's like, what's going on there? That's fucking crazy. They realize it was a chimp. They're all like, what the hell is that monkey doing on the ice? They're all, they're freaking out.

So then all the owners have a meeting because they profit share. This is a real scene and plot point in the movie. The owners get together. They're like, what? Should we allow this monkey to play in our league? They all profit share. They're like, oh, people will pay money to see this monkey play hockey. Let's do it.

So that's them. They're all agreeing that he could be in the league. He's now a legal player. Everything is above board. Welcome to the team, Jack. Hey, can I just one quick intersection? Of course. We could do that while shit's up on the stage.

Because the audience has already pointed out a few times, and I imagine they're going to point it out over and over again. We know that a chimpanzee is not a monkey. It's I get it. They're not the same thinge is not a monkey. It's, I get it. They're not the same thing, but monkey's just a fun word to say. Okay, sorry, go ahead. Now with Jack joining the Nuggets, the Nuggets go from shit to hit.

Hit. Immediately. They're going up. They're scoring goals. Jack's hitting people with sticks. They're on papers. He slums up. Oh, everything's great.

They're going to the Harvest Cup, is like the highest uh achievement you get it's like their Super Bowl essentially for their league or Stanley Cup if we're within hockey but what happened to those bad guys he's all like calling around people are like hey where's Jack what's going on with Jack we're gonna remove our funding if you can't find jack so he's calling going like where's my monkey and he's eating he's eating stuff and then he looks at the tv and he sees highlights of jack playing hockey saying that he's gonna be in this tournament so he's like oh there he is there's my monkey i'm gonna go get him so he travels to vancouver bc which is where the championship is for the Heritage Cup. And this is all because he doesn't like hepatitis? Uh, this,

he was trying to, no, there's no reason. He just wanted money. They're gonna pay him money to send him to this facility. So he's walking around the arena. Tara walks into him, spills her hot chocolate all over his pants, and then him and his sidekick are like, hey, have you seen my monkey

with a wanted poster? And Tara, like, runs away in fear. And so he chases after her and goes to the team's room and is like, give me the monkey now. And he points at him. They close the door. I think this guy was dressed as a pirate once in Kenan & Kel. I'd love to check that. So quick, they have to make a plan

because they're there to steal Jack so they're going through they look at the back of Jack's photo they see the name El Simi Nature Preserve they're like this must be it this must be his home so they call the preserve and then Tara gets in a cab and she's going to go help figure things out

she's leaving the arena they're go go now she's go go nowing to get assistance for the future. After all that happens, we go back to the game because it's important. It's the championship match. It's 1-1, two minutes, 32 seconds on the clock. Third period, it's down to the wire.

The Nuggets take a shot and it stops on the line. I need to drink water in my throat. And that's not a goal. That's not a goal. It hasn't crossed. It stopped directly on the line i need to drink water my throat and that's not a goal that's not a goal it hasn't crossed it stopped directly on the line so it's a big scramble the goalie gets all caught up the goalies being held down they're fighting all the players fighting but jack he slides for it he goes right between the legs of the guy oh he's he's begged him. And he scores! The Nuggets win. The Nuggets win the championship.

They're all celebrating. Everyone's all happy. It's a huge success. But wait! It was Tara all along! She's the one who scored. She slid in. And they're like,

it was Tara? Where's Jack? What happened? Doesn't matter. Party time. We're celebrating. We're celebrating the win. It's a big win. Bad're celebrating. We're celebrating the wind is a big win bad guys lost

But where's Jack? Jack's on a journey. He was the one who got in the cab They took him to the airport and bought him a ticket to go back to the El simian preserve So he's riding in he goes home. He gets driven there. He sees his family his best friend Darren now works there Everything's great. He gives him a hug. It's just happy. Everything's all run happy. They win the championship. Everyone's great. He goes home. Darren's there.

It is the end of the film. BANANA WIPE! The end! Oh, you did it! Oh, you did it! That was excellent! But wait! There's more!

Where are they now so i was curious uh about jack and who played him in the role jack was played by three different uh chimps louis bernie and mac yes one of them bernie uh you see there bernie played him i think the most most for MVP, and I believe also in MVP 2. Bernie is now in the Oakland Zoo. Oh. Did he get put on a train? Yeah, he flew. That's where he really went. He went there.

I read in 2010 was the last update I was able to find of Bernie, so I emailed the Oakland Zoo to confirm he was still a resident there. They replied saying, yes, he was. And then sent me a bunch of information about how using animals and films is wrong. So I did not follow up. Banana wipe! The end. What about the other two?

The other two chimps? I have no idea where they went. Okay. What was the bad guy's name in the suit? Oh, God. What was it? Is it Peabody, maybe? I don't remember.

He's such an insignificant character in the movie. I was trying to look up the cast to see if he did, in fact, appear in... Oh, is that right? Was I right? I don't know. I can't. I think he worked at a jewelry shop in Friends, too. Is his name Dr. Peabody?

Maybe that's it. Yeah. I think it is Peabody. Okay, let's see. He appeared in... Oh uh oh my god he's been in 115 things he's been in a lot of stuff i've seen him as just a miffed brit in pretty much every american thing he's in you said keenan and kell right yeah it's not showing up for that oh, was that, well, what's that show called? Kel, Kenan and Kel? No, no. He played Gavin the waiter.

He played Gavin the waiter in 1999 in Kenan and Kel. Yeah. Yeah, I think he was dressed as a pirate with a parrot on him. He was the British colonel

in The Spy Who Shagged Me. Really? Oh, that's where I recognize him from. Yeah. I could see that now. Oh, he's in MVP 2 as well. Oh, spoiler.

He plays a different character. And he's Dr. Peabody in Most Viable Primate in MVP 2 Most Vertical Primate, which I do not know what it's called. His name is Mr. Rahasia. Interesting.

We'll have to keep our eye open for him. We will. Anyway, I didn't mean to get a sidetrack. Andrewrew that was a phenomenal recitation i feel i feel completely and totally versed in the mvp universe now and i don't know about you gavin but i was i was i was hanging on your every word i loved it that was great and uh and the surprise banana wipe at the end yeah oh it's uh yeah i i got a lot of help in putting that together uh if it was just me i it would it would have definitely been more salad creamed i'm glad that you guys enjoyed it

i'm excited to watch this movie i yeah i don't know if this is terrible i don't know if this will be fun i'm hoping it will be fun i know it starts out great it has a fantastic opening it's the only thing i've revisited in recent time. Should we start? We probably should. This guy is like my new favorite actor. His roles, man. He, uh...

I've posted in the text chat. Was that Darren? Or Peabody? Oh, there he is! Mr. Peabody! Or Dr. Peabody. That's fantastic. Oh, that's fantastic.

Oh, that's awesome. All right. Well, I think that covers MVP1, Most Vertical Primate from 2000 in its entirety. If you needed a primer before you watch MVP2, you've got it right there. Thanks for listening to this. Now go ahead and stop. And then if you're brave,

hop on into MVP2 with us, Most Vertical Primate. What service is it on so people can watch along? Amazon Prime. Amazon. You can get it on Amazon and Tubi. I was about to say,

I have no idea. It sounds like Amazon Prime. Okay, there you go. I mean you just share a screen through discord yeah I clicked the button and it took me here so you click the discord button for sharing screens I click I click the discord button for sharing screen and it took me here I don't know why you're mad at me. I don't know. I don't know why I'm getting yelled at for yawning All I did was yawn. I'm getting attacked for that. I'm clicking buttons. I'm doing everything I'm clicking you think that you think the thing that absolves you here is that you're clicking buttons You think that's what I want to hear? Yeah. Yeah, because you wanted me to share my wait

Why is Gavin Gavin just shared his screen. It was very easy. Oh, congratulations. You on a different computer were able to do a thing that I couldn't do on my computer. It's 100% simple. No, I got a security pop-up.

Yeah. I mean, it's just... It's dead simple to share your screen. You can choose to quit Google Chrome app now or do it on your own later. I don't under... Are you... Do you not have Discord?

You have the app? Like a browser app? I'm just on their browser. Yeah, I just go on the browser. What? I just Google it. Oh, we're... I don't use the app.

We're fucked. This isn't like... So we're doing Discord through a browser. Why? The entire time. Why? Why wouldn't I... Because, listen, why would I do it any other way?

It's a program. Look, I'm sharing my screen. Yeah. Jeff, did it take you... Like, when you were doing that, did it take you to a Google Chrome page where you just started clicking buttons? No, it didn't do any of those things.

Okay, wait. No, wait a second. I think it's okay now. I think we can record the screen now. Share your screen. This is so good already. Entire screen. Who's Jerry Lee Lewis?

What do you mean, who's Jerry Lee Lewis? He's not American. Gavin's not American. Oh, yeah. I mean, consider that. I think I'm sure he's dead. He's famous for marrying his wife. Oh, no, no. No, Jerry Lewis is not dead

are you talking about Jerry Lee Lewis or Jerry Lee Lewis Jerry Lee Lewis is not dead oh a bunch of reports came out saying he died he is not dead he's famous for marrying his 14 year old cousin he's not famous for marrying his cousin he is famous and he married his

cousin but not dead no he's not dead no it came out yesterday a bunch of people reported that he's dead he's like 88 or 89 he's old it just popped up on my watch dead at 87 no wait hang on did no he didn't act he actually died jerry lewis died did he just die i mean it just popped up on my watch. I just tweeted about him yesterday. I mean, one day ago, Entertainment Weekly, one day ago, Jerry Lee Lewis is alive after being erroneously reported dead at 87. Is he dead? That would be annoying to die the next day after that. He cannot live.

It's not on CNN. That happened with the Queen, right? There are fake reports that they were like, oh, she's dead. And they're like, no, she's not dead. She's fine. Wikipedia says he's alive. No, Wikipedia says he's dead. And TMZ is reporting no, she's not dead. She's fine. Wikipedia says he's alive. No, Wikipedia says he's dead. And TMZ is reporting.

Oh, yeah. No, he's dead. He's dead. What are the chances? We weren't even going to give him socks. I mean, hi. He's Gavin. Do you remember?

Have you ever heard that song? Goodness, gracious, great balls of fire. Oh, yeah. I've heard that. That's Jerry Lee Lewis. I tweeted that yesterday. Oh, after the thing. I did.

Just because I thought it was funny. Yeah. You tweeted. people wouldn't have context. All I did was tweet Great Balls of Fire, the video for it. Because he was reported dead? No, because my balls were on fire. Oh, and so you killed him? I guess. You killed Jerry Lee Lewis?

I didn't even know you were doing that. Holy shit! Andrew killed Jerry Lee Lewis. Oh, Andrew's live. Okay, so. Jeff, go ahead and intro it, and then we'll go from there. Okay, you ready? Am I recording?

Your doc is a nightmare. I just wanted to make sure. All right, is it now? I'm going to wait for Andrew to say he's recording and good. I'm recording. Yeah, I'm good. Seven minutes in. Are you streaming to us at the highest quality?

I don't know what that means. How would I check that? Because you get to pick the resolution. Oh, stream settings. I can change windows. How many bits do you have? Are you going to blow through all your bits? Oh, no.

My bits are good. My bits are secure. I don't know how I would change that setting, Gavin. How does it look? You look for me. Tell me how it looks. It looks a bit blurry. There's one setting that says smoother frame rate

and the other one says more readable text. So I want... Yours doesn't have that. I hate... He's probably because he's using a browser version. Jesus Christ. Of all of the apps on your dock, of all of those,

none of them are Discord. No. Why would I download it when I can just Google it? I don't even know what all these are. I'll tell you what they aren't.