Regulation Podcast - Fish: The Sneakiest Animal // F**kface Bar Game Olympics [129]

Episode Date: November 23, 2022

Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about the sneakiest animal, robbing Gavin to illustrate a point, Andrew's magic phase, 250 darts, axe throwing, throwing a frisbee bad, is Nick good at Cornhole, submarine pitchers, how british for Toad in the Hole, Regulation Animation, and a three Ha man. Want to contribute to bits? Email what you can do to [e-mail]  Sponsored by Better Help http://betterhelp.com/face, Shopify http://shopify.com/face, and Shady Rays http://shadyrays.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is a Rooster Teeth production. Well, I'm most surprised by things attacking me in the seat. That- what? That's just because you have limited visibility. Exactly what I said! Exactly! I agree. I'm agreeing with that. It's just because that's not sneaky on the animal's part. It's dumb on your part for being in their environment.

Oh, so it's dumb to be in the ocean. Oh, yeah. It's absolutely dumb to be in the ocean. I actually agree with that. I think being in the ocean is awesome, but if you're concerned about being snuck up on by an ocean animal, then, yeah, don't go to the ocean. If you're okay with it, if you accept concerned about being snuck up on by an by an ocean animal then yeah don't go to the ocean if you're okay with it if you if you if you accept the risk then you're totally yeah no i'm not saying

i'm concerned by it i'm just saying that it's a high problem if it's something were to come up i wouldn't expect it it would surprise me it'd be i just don't think that if you were to search what's the sneakiest animal it would say fish no i agree i also think that i think that what see you think it's hello and welcome to another episode of the face podcast my name is jeff ramsey with me as always andrew pantin gavin free i believe this is episode 129 correct me if i'm wrong that is correct here's the deal you think being snuck up on in the you would be caught off guard and surprised by being snuck up on the ocean by a fish because your neck is always going to be in this scenario. You're imagining your neck is above water and you're not looking at your feet. If you were to walk around with like a piece of cardboard around your neck sticking out so that you couldn't see your feet as you walk down the street, you would be just as surprised by a squirrel or a bird or a rat or a dog or a cat attacking you.

It's purely a peripheral vision thing. No, absolutely. But the question was, what is the sneakiest animal? And I was thinking that 100% of animal interactions I've had in the sea, I'd categorize as sneaky. I never saw it coming, as opposed to land. I think they have a distinct advantage. I'm not saying it's because of the animal itself,

but their environment gives them an upper edge and sneakiness. Now, see, I would argue that the hardest place on Earth to be snuck up on is the ocean if you're underwater with goggles on because you can see 365 degrees around you at all times. Whereas if you're in the woods or the jungle or even

in a neighborhood, there's a million places for animals to hide. You can see 360, that's like all the way around plus a little bit more. Yeah, you just gotta do a flip or a turn, there's a million places for animals to hide. You can see 306, that's like all the way around, plus a little bit more. Yeah, you just gotta do a flip or a turn. 365 degrees. There's nothing around you impairing your vision, it's just open water and animals. Yeah, you can see

24, 24.7 degrees around. I'm arguing against your point though, because your stance is essentially, if you're prepared to not be snuck up on, you will not be snuck up on. I don't know what that what that proves your statement i just think if you stick your head above anything then you're in the same situation there's nothing i don't think it has anything to do with a fish i just think if you can say a coyote is sneakier than a fish then a fish isn't going to be the sneakiest animal and a coyote is definitely sneakier than a fish oh 100 percent

yeah what's what, real quick. What's Swiper? He's a fox, right? A fox, right? Yeah. The sneakiest animal on earth right there. Swiper is, his whole job is being sneaky and he's a fox. So I would say the fox is the sneakiest animal.

Gavin, any thoughts on the sneakiest animal? Uh, anglerfish. That's a fish. You think an anglerfish is the sneakiest animal? You're like, oh, look at that bright light. And then. That's a fish you think an anglerfish is the sneakiest animal you like oh that bright light and then That's a great point That's an animal that makes you think it's something it's not can we know another and certainly that's just big and there and dark And you can't it's if anything it's the scary

Planet if you thought you're looking at like a Subaru and then it ate you that'd be terrified planet if you thought you're looking at like a subaru and then it ate you that'd be terrifying i think that if if you can say a skunk is sneakier than a than like any of these fish then a fish isn't on this list and a skunk is way sneakier than any of these fish doesn't it doesn't dangle shit that you want in front of it though no but it's sneaky i don't know if a skunk is sneaky i I also don't think their intent is sneaky. So you talk about the act of sneaking, not the act of like being ambushed. I'm trying to figure this out myself. I don't think anybody said anything

about being ambushed. I just said, what's the sneakiest animal? Yeah, I definitely don't want to be ambushed by skunks. See? That's a tough one. So here's the thing. I posed this before we started recording. I posed this to Andrew and then he said fish and I said I don't know about fish i think it's mostly the environment he said okay so we're taking all animals and putting them on the same plane and i don't agree with that

because that eliminates all birds and and all fish it doesn't make any sense i just don't think a fish is the sneakiest animal well also for for gavin to be snuck up on by an anglerfish, his bones would have compressed and crushed well before that because they're like a thousand feet underwater, right? There's never a scenario where you and an anglerfish

are going to be in the same location and alive. It's so far down that sunlight doesn't reach the area. They could travel. Why can't they?

You got a curious anglerfish, it can't come up to the surface, it's not allowed. Is there anything that prevents that from happening? It'd probably explode. Really? I hope so. If it's meant for super high pressure, then you bring it into a low pressure environment, wouldn't it just like

all that shit leak out? I hope so. I don't want to create a scenario in which I could find an angler fish just while I'm walking on the beach. If we could choose angler fish, then I'm going to pick the scariest animal on Earth. Or no, sorry, the scariest animal in the universe is a space worm.

Because I've never seen a space worm, but worms are everywhere. And I guarantee you, somewhere in space, in the infinite of space, there are space worms. And they're fucking wiggling around right now and you'll never see them coming.

That's true. Microscopic. Yeah. It's a great example. I always thought fish were dumb for falling for the angular fish trap, but I think I would fall for that. If there was just a light in the sky I wasn't expecting, I'd definitely get eaten by that.

Plus, there's never any light, right? So it's like you're just swimming along in the darkness. That's true. And then suddenly the world looks different in a way it never has before. That'd be pretty jarring. Yeah. I have a question.

Okay. What are you guys on about? Eric asked what the sneakiest animal is. Why are you asking that? We were just having pleasantries and I just asked about what the sneakiest animal because I think it's probably some kind of cat and then andrew said fish and now here we are no i get a good point in that the pink panther was very sneaky that's true well he was an international jewel thief i will i i popped in gavin when

andrew was explaining that he thinks he can sneak up on an owl i could that was my argument against what because eric said an owl. I could. That was my argument against what, because Eric said an owl is sneakier than a fish. And I was saying, I don't think there's any way in hell. The greatest anti-sneak device. Have you seen all around?

That's what I said. I think I said 365 degrees instead of 300 or 365 days instead of 360 degrees. But like an owl can see anywhere. Have you seen me try to sneak uh i would say that with your ankle dexterity you might be one of the worst sneakers no answer the question have you seen me try to sneak no exactly that's how good i am true you you can hardly walk with your ankles i don't understand how you're sneaking are you like belly crawling like what are you talking about listen you don't need to question the form. You just are not gonna know I'm there.

I'm in and out. You explained how you tried to sneak um, Chinese food menus on the doors in a neighborhood to steal your own package back, and it didn't sound very stealthy to me, buddy. I've sat in a room that Gavin walked through and he didn't see me once. This is why my sneaking has established

that I wasn't even trying in that moment. Being already in the room, if you're there trying to steal the Pink Panther diamond and you're already next to the diamond, that's not the sneaky part. No, that's brilliant. He wins the argument right there. I think you're right. You blended into the environment and nobody noticed you.

But you had to walk in on your busted ankles to get in there. And you never saw it happen, did you? You're not sneaky your busted ankles to get in there. And you don't know how I'm going to go out. You're not sneaky. You're just early. No. That's rude. Being early is a pretty sneaky technique, though, isn't it?

Yeah, I'm going to rob a bank by standing in the spot the bank will eventually be built on. What would be the problem? I mean, obviously, that's a ridiculous scenario i hate to be mad at people being early nobody's complaining about early no one's been robbed and complained that they weren't there like in the right time like home alone home alone 2 they robbed uh duncan's toy chest by getting there early they didn't sneak in well that's pretty sneaky i will say that's an act of sneaking. Yeah, it's more, more,

more appropriate analogy. Gavin would be, I'm going to stand where I think they're going to build a bank. It would be, I get to the bank right as they open. And then I stand so still all day long that the bank closes around me and nobody notices me anymore

because I've blended, I've blended into the environment. Soon as the lights turn off, then you go and you rob. I can't wait to sneak up on Gavin at some point. You're going to be shocked. You're going to be stunned by my sneaking abilities. When we're next together in person,

your challenge is to tap me on the back without me knowing you're there. Easy. Easy. I'm going to have to bring a camera because you're not even going to feel it. You're not even going to know it happened. So I'll get a picture of you touching my it. You're not even gonna know it happened

Touching my back and I would know that it happened. Yeah, I'm also gonna take your wallet You're gonna Illustrate a point not because I want to, but because he's... I don't want to rob from you, but you're an idiot. Let me show you how sneaky I am. I'm going to tape a $100 bill to my back, and you're not going to be able to get anywhere near it. Oh, you're going to be like, oh, wow, this bat, you didn't do anything, Andrew.

You're going to go back there. It's going to be fucking Monopoly money. It's going to be gone. I'm going to do switch and ruin you. I'm going to replace it with some Monopoly money. I went through a magic phase between the ages of 8 and 12 okay i know my sleight of hand i could palm coins you went through a magic phase oh big magic phase yeah yeah was that before after the sneaking phase uh no it was all part of it it just built onto it okay it's built onto it yeah i can levitate if you stand at a specific

angle don't ask any questions i don't know that takes a lot of uh single ankle strength i'm not sure you can still do that oh no no i definitely can't i would get i was the worst magician of all time because i would get too excited and i wouldn't practice the tricks enough and they'd never work and if they did work i would do them back to back and then it would just be obvious that how it worked. So you're going to draw upon your skills as the four year long worst magician ever?

Yeah. Yeah, I am. That's all part of the illusion. Think of a card right now, Gavin. Think of a card. No, don't say it. No, I was halfway through making a different joke. Okay. Think of a card I think no yeah I'll say it no I was halfway through making a different joke okay think of a card any card okay do you have in your

head you did the suit you have see got a lot yeah nine of diamonds uh shockingly close but no damn I was the same if I was right though it's seven oh you're too off that's pretty good seven and a nine even look like cousins. Wait, how did that trick work, Andrew? Like, what was the trick there? That was just you picking, you had a one in 52 chance? Yeah. If I would have got it, it would have been pretty cool.

I'm pretty close. Honestly, that was slightly worrying that you got so close. If this was a golf game, I'm in perfect setup for a birdie right now. I consider this a win. That was, I'm right next to the hole. Didn't get in it. I'm in perfect setup for a birdie right now. I consider this a win. I'm right next to the hole. Didn't get in it. I'm right there, though. Why were you talking to me about darts the other day, by the way? Oh, I was just thinking about darts.

I have a friend who got into darts, and I'm terrible at it. I'd love to hear everyone's response to this. First of all, Jeff, Eric, are you good at darts? Would you consider yourself decent? Yeah, I'm fine. Yeah, absolutely. Interesting. Okay, so as people that consider themselves decent to good at darts, Would you consider yourself decent? Yeah, I'm fine. Interesting. Okay, so as people that consider themselves decent to good at darts,

how many throws do you think it would take you to hit a bullseye? I mean, that's not how darts games work. No, not at all. But I could probably get one in ten. I think if you gave me ten darts and I was really aiming for it, I bet I could get one in ten.

Eric, you gave the exact same answer as me I did I really six six okay the difference is Gavin said he was bad at darts and he was one in 10 which I think is bad I just said I'm not good like I wouldn't win a game of darts but you can be 10 darts I can put it where I want so you'd say your average at darts uh because I assumed you were bad. You're right. I could have phrased that better. I just know you're not good based on your assessment. I'd say I'm below average, but I could still hit a bullseye in 10.

See, that was shocking because I think I'm bad at darts. My number is like 250. I think it would take me around 250 darts to hit. You said 250. I said I could do 250 blindfolded. There's no way. I could eventually get a bullseye with 250 blindfolded. There's no way. I could eventually get a bullseye with 250 blindfolded darts.

No way. Dude, you could hit a bullseye just... If you've got 250 darts to do it in, you could just grab a handful of 20 and chuck them all at once and you'd get a bullseye. I think you're greatly overestimating. I don't think I am.

I think this is... A regulation distance like seven feet from the board. Blindfolded. If someone was given call outs like colder, warmer,

I could get you I could get a bullseye at 250. Big John, little John. I just like you're saying we're overestimating 250 is an insane

amount of darts to throw at the board and not get a bullseye. No, I agree. That's how bad I am. You physically couldn't fit that many darts on a board, I don't think. Oh, I think I could easily. You want to get a dartboard?

We can figure this out. I'll get a dartboard. I bet you would take over 250. You might be right. That's ridiculous. The problem is, though, people will just assume I'm throwing it on purpose, that I'm not.

That'd be the issue. That would be my assumption. Yeah. I'd be cheating in some way. I feel like we need to have a, like, the next time we're all together, we need to have a dart off now. I think we just need a separate sideshow called, a spinoff called Burger Confidence, where it's just, it's just the bets.

where it's just the bets. I don't think, I think if you threw 10 darts a day, you wouldn't get it within a week. That's ridiculous. That's 70 darts? Yeah. If you threw 10 darts a day,

you'd get a dart, you'd get a bullseye a day. There's no, no. It's not that hard, man. Can you throw, like, do you have no aim whatsoever? I have a friend that's good. They went 0 for 20 on their first attempt.

It's tough. I think most people, like, if you have aim, you have aim. Like, one time at work, Gavin was on one side of the office, and I was 15 feet away, and I, with one ping pong ball, threw it so hard, and I was trying to hit him in the forehead, I hit him right between the eyes so hard I split his head open. And that was just one shot.

If I could do that with a ping pong ball, I could definitely do it with a dart, which is designed to be thrown. I think I had a cut or a scab there and you just made me bleed with a ping pong ball. I get the throwing mechanic. I don't think those two equate at all. Absolutely.

It's the exact same thing. I disagree. There's no difference between throwing a dart and a baseball no i don't think that's true i learned uh last week that i'm pretty good at throwing axes i don't think that's a skill the bar throwing axe thing there's a bunch of hipster bars in austin that would disagree with you i watched dan and bk do it after me, and I scored pretty well. Yeah? Maybe I've only seen, because I've never done it,

but I've only seen videos of people do it, and they always do really well. So that could be adjusting my... It just doesn't seem that hard. To be honest, it didn't feel very hard. But it looked hard for Dan. So you think throwing an axe is easier than throwing a dart?

Yes. The axe landed wherever I looked. I feel like a dart, you need more precision than that. It's a different, yeah, it's a more precise tool. Absolutely. You've got a wide range. You've got a big face on that axe to hit the board. It's stuck in.

I think I could throw, I think it's really, like I have not done axe throwing, but I would imagine it's pretty easy to bonk it off the handle and not get it into the wood at all. To me, I feel like axe throwing is all about form. That's what darts is all about. No, but I feel like there's a mechanism to releasing of the axe that is opposed to, it's more precise with a dart.

You got a smaller range. Dude, throwing is all about form form no matter what you're throwing whether it's a football or a soccer ball no but i i feel like i don't know how to hold a dart i feel like my finger position might be wrong like the technique how much risk do i like i just i feel like mechanically i'm in the woods uh not the woods i'm in the sea that's a better analogy it's a sneakier place i'm in the ocean when it comes to throwing a dart. I don't know what's going on. But when it's an axe, I feel like you just kind of let go of the thing. And I'm probably completely wrong, but it just doesn't seem that difficult.

Yeah, it definitely feels, the axe felt a lot easier to me. Eric, why is this wild? Eric's freaking out. I just don't, I don't get the like, the pushback on the axe thing and how it doesn't like it's one-to-one with darts like none of this makes any sense but like but also i can't throw a frisbee to save my life i can't i just can't i don't know what it is there's something things you're embarrassed about yes it is i'm very embarrassed about the way i throw a frisbee uh people invite me to go like frisbee golf is like a thing in austin People invite me to go like Frisbee. Frisbee golf is like a thing in Austin.

People invite me to go and I turn them down. People like Jack. Yeah. Jack has not. But hopefully that keeps up because I don't want to go. But so I can kind of see what Andrew's saying. But the form of a dart, I agree with Jeff. It's very close to like a baseball.

It's very close to other things, and especially axe throwing. So to say that the technique of one is so different from the technique of the other, I don't agree with. And it's really something. And I like that he said, I've seen people do it and it seems like it's easy. Darts seems like it's

easy. It's darts. Darts is so easy, they allow you to do it around alcohol. They encourage you to do it around alcohol they encourage you to do it while drunk at every bar in the world i just i feel like your your dart throw to axing would be like saying i can drive a boat because i know how to drive a car like it's the mechanically like you're driving vehicles but they're completely different i think it's a different thing it's not that different one to one it's pretty different thing. It's not that different. I don't think it's one-to-one. It's pretty... Driving anything is pretty similar, I think.

I don't think that's true. Unless it's got a complicated clutch of some kind. Hmm. Okay. Have you ever driven a boat? Yeah. You steer left, it goes left. You steer right, it goes right.

I don't think I have. You move up, it goes up. Fast. You move back, it goes slow. It goes up. It's pretty... Well, you that the handle that you just go up to go forward like Star

Trek and yeah no those are great I don't think I've ever driven a boat I have played hydro thunder and the arcade you got the little stick on that that's great and that's pretty that that's pretty similar to play an outrun or hang on or Ridge Racer I'm an automatic guy in those games though I don't fuck with the shift it's too

it's bullshit it's way easier to drive a shift in real life than in a video game when I was a kid I uh for some reason I had a tennis racket I had and I got a new tennis racket so my old one was like a spare and for some reason I really wanted to throw

it to see what it felt like. The axe throwing reminded me of this, but I lived, I had such a small back garden and my road was so crammed in and small. I felt like I couldn't throw it as hard as I could without hitting something. So I walked all the way to this field to throw my tennis racket to see what it felt like. What? How did it feel?

Did you feel good? Really satisfying. Yeah? It's really satisfying to throw something that's, like, top heavy because it goes like... But I remember just being, like, sneaking around, just being like, I want to go somewhere and throw this.

Now, if you were sneakier, would you have gone more often? Or where does your sneak skill align with your tennis throwing hobby? If I was sneakier, I probably would have gone under the water. Really? With the fish. Now, that wouldn't be fun to throw under the water, though. That'd be terrible. Agreed.

You're right. That's a good point. Resistant. Eric said something earlier that triggered an idea I was debating on having with y'all. Are we doing two episodes today? I assume so. Oh shit, are we? I thought so. I assumed so as well. So I wasn't sure if I'd talk about

this episode or not, but I was thinking about mayonnaise, right? And how much I fucking hate mayonnaise. Mayonnaise? Mayonnaise? Yeah, like I just can't stand mayonnaise, right? It's white. I don't like white stuff it's probably the grossest of all white things to me maybe is mayo um mayo or or maybe maybe cream cheese cream cheese actually cream cheese because if i if i smell mayonnaise i want to throw up but if i look at cream cheese i want to throw up. So and I was wondering, like, could I train myself to like mayonnaise if

I had to? Like if somebody said, like, I need you, I need you to like mayonnaise. Here's a million dollars in a year. Could I get there? And I feel like I probably could. Right. Like, I feel like there are probably things that we all hate that we if we wanted to like get over this hurdle, we could probably learn to like. And I wonder if if we agreed to do it, we could get Eric good at Frisbee. Like we can start training and practicing and turn Eric's Frisbee failure into a Frisbee success. Here's here's the thing. I Jeff, maybe you could. I don't know what Gavin and Andrew are providing in this situation

what do you mean I think to improve your form and frisbee throwing yeah like what could we bring to the table yeah Mr. 300 darts over here isn't going to be helpful to you I'm terrible I'm a bad frisbee thrower too see see so what so, it would just be me and you throwing a frisbee and then Gavin is also, yeah, and then Gavin would throw it. So I stand by my statement. That sounds like two friends hanging out on the weekend. It sounds lovely. Thanks for the invite. I've seen

Gavin throw a frisbee though. We've thrown frisbees together. Yeah, we were okay. We got one stuck in a tree, didn't we? Yeah, we used to live over off back when we lived down at the rental house with Jordan Sweers, we threw okay. Oh, we got one stuck in a tree, didn't we? Yeah, remember we used to live over off, back when we lived down at the rental house, where with Jordan Sweers, we threw Frisbees a couple times. That's true.

I think I have a picture of him climbing a tree to get it out. Frisbees are satisfying to throw. What happens when you throw a Frisbee, Eric? It goes way off to the side. I try to make it go straight. I do the thing. I look at it.

I point my toe. It's release right where I need it to be. And then it just keeps going off to the right. Are you putting your whole body into it? Yeah. Oh, I'm doing everything. There's just something about the mechanic of it where I can't get,

I don't know. I'm fine with every other sport. I can throw a football, throw a baseball. I'm fine. It's sports, golf, whatever. But for some reason, I throw a Frisbee and it just doesn't go anywhere where i need it to go and and the worst the worst part the worst part about throwing a frisbee wrong is you gotta go get it and it's a long and boy it's a long walk to wherever it ended up kevin what did you expect

him to say that was a ridiculous question by you. No. What happens when you throw it? He misses. That's the whole point. It doesn't turn into like a fucking weasel or an owl. It could have not gone very far. It could have been an accuracy issue. No, I agree with Gavin here. I think

the answer dictates how you fix the problem. Like if he's like, every time I throw it it goes straight in the fucking air, then you're like straight up. You're like, oh, okay, well your angle's wrong. Listen, I'm not going toates how you fix the problem. Like if he's like, every time I throw it, it goes straight in the fucking air, then you're like, like straight up, you're like, oh okay, well your angle's wrong. Listen, I'm not gonna argue with you about this, Geoff. You're the fucking Tiger Woods of disc golf by how it sounds. But Gavin, on the other hand, I have no confidence in his ability to throw a frisbee. I don't know what he's freaking little... You give me one of those freaking aerobie things,

give me one of those rings, I will send that thing over everything that we're looking at. Those things go so far. things, give me one of those rings, I will send that thing over everything that we're looking at. Those things go so far. What does that prove? What are you proving by doing that? What are you saying? I'm shit at frisbee. Yeah, if we're talking about accuracy, you're just like, I can throw a thing far.

That's great, but that's not what- You say hit that tree, you say hit that tree, I'll get it in the tree. What if it was like a small Christmas tree? I'll give it a damn good go. I'll get close. Here's the thing with Eric, though. And his problem is one we can fix. Eric, I've got a high-speed camera. We can do slow-mo sports analysis on your release point.

Here's the thing. Eric, it is all in the wrist. The Frisbee, and by the way, I've never played disc golf in my life. I don't even think I've ever thrown one, but I've thrown a fucking Frisbee. It's 100% in the wrist motion. We can fix that. Gavin, I think that your solution is great

and is half of a solution because you're going to film me in slow motion throwing a Frisbee, and then we're going to look at it, and everyone you're going to film me in slow motion throwing a frisbee and then we're gonna look at it and and everyone's just gonna go just throw it you know look right there throw it straighter and nothing's gonna happen no one here can break down film like a sports analyst you're just gonna show we're gonna you're gonna film it and then we're gonna look at it in slow motion and then Jeff's gonna go oh yeah just

you know throw it like you know point when you release it it's just gonna be useful to know like how much later or earlier to let go I would look at it and say that looks pretty good to me yeah exactly you don't think we'll be like,

what was that show Kobe Bryant did on ESPN Details where he would break down film of how NBA players could improve their game? No, I don't. You don't think we could do that for you, Eric? No. No. Are you asking if you're Kobe Bryant in this situation, Jeff?

No, I just, well, yeah, I guess so. Yeah, I guess so. I think we could break down the film and help you, I really do. I don't think it's that complicated. I was on your side at first. Upon thinking about this further, let's calm down for a minute.

You're the one that's supposed to be throwing an 80 mile per hour fastball. Why don't we figure out how to improve your form first? Why are we going to Eric? No, no, listen. I'm not fighting. I don't need you to film. I know what I'm doing and how to do it right. I'm fighting father time.

I am fighting age. Me and LeBron, right? It's just every day the Grim Reaper's coming a little bit closer for our abilities, as do I. LeBron's out right now with a groin injury. My groin hasn't been fine for six months. Can you imagine if LeBron had a right now with a groin injury. My groin hasn't been fine for six months. Like, can you imagine if LeBron had,

had a fucking jock itch scenario? Like that was his lower body. It's always a hamstring. You two are not dealing with similar. I guess he had the ankles. That's fair. Dude, if LeBron had my jock itch,

he would miss the entire fucking season. Oh, he would be so uncomfortable. He'd play really well. Yeah. Nobody would want to guard someone with jock itch all the way down the leg. You're not getting in there.

Nick's a DNP crotch rot. That's great. Okay, so we're going to pass on trying to fix my frisbee throw then, right? Like, we don't have to worry about that? Like, I don't have to worry about trying to fix my frisbee throw? I think we should.

If Eric and I tried to play frisbee together, it would be like we're playing with ghosts like it would be so far left and right on both sides nobody would assume we were in the same here's what we do here's what we have to be upon a bit of a wider lens jeff and eric side by side in the same shot and we'll compare and we'll take notes we'll try and apply jeff knows exactly what he did he can maybe move some of that information accurately to you, and with the visuals, I think you can throw a good Frisbee.

Here's what's going to be really funny. I'm talking a big Frisbee game like I know what the fuck I'm talking about. 100%. Much like I did with a baseball game. That one worked out for me. I have no idea if this Frisbee thing... I don't have the confidence for Frisbees

that I had for hitting the baseball. So there's a very good chance we'll film this and Eric will instantly be better than me. I would just love to find out. Burger Confidence, episode one. Alright. Wherever you're going, you better believe American Express will be right there with you. Heading for adventure?

We'll help you breeze through security. Meeting friends a world away? You can use your travel credit. Squeezing every drop out of the last day? How about a 4 p.m. late checkout? Just need a nice place to settle in? Enjoy your room upgrade. Wherever you go, we'll go together. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca slash yamx. Benefits vary by card. Terms apply. Who do you think can throw a frisbee the farthest?

Accurately? Or just the farthest? Like if, I guess the five of us got together in a field, let's say sometime next week, and we all had our own color-coded frisbees that were identical in every way other than they were just different colors for identification. And we tried to see who could do an Olympic-style

shot-put Frisbee throw to see who could throw. I bet Nick is a dark horse. Oh, Nick is a good one. I wasn't even considering Nick. Yeah, Nick would win. Nick's in the running. Nick's an athletic guy. Nick is the only guy where if we shot me in slow motion,

I think he could look at the footage and really break down. Well, there's your problem. I think he could do that. But that is just based on knowing the rest of you and saying that he would just know better than everyone else. It's a pretty low bar. I just feel like,

I feel like we got to find out like, cause you never know. One time Gavin and I had a spitting contest, and What? I spit Talking distance? Yeah, distance. How far did I spit, Gav? I had no idea that I had that in me. I must have spit 25 feet.

Yeah, I was gonna say 25 feet. There's no way. Who knows? You might be surprised. You spit 25 feet. It's on video, dude. You can go watch it. It may have had some windage behind it. Did you do it in a tornado? Like, what is the scenario in which?

I did it during a tropical storm. No. Anyway, I just, I think it would be interesting, and I think that, I do agree, I think that Nick is the early favorite. I was also thinking, like, you know, now that we're talking about Nick, what do you think, what do you think sport Nick is the early favorite. I was also thinking like, you know, now that we're talking about Nick, what do you think,

what do you think sport Nick is the best at? Because I'm gonna, basketball? Yeah. Okay. I bet Nick is really good at cornhole.

He seems like he would be great at cornhole. Yeah, I can see that too. What sport, what? Nick responded with, oh dude, I rule a cornhole. Absolutely.

Yeah, he absolutely would. I knew it. Nick has cornhole written all over him. He's a dad. He should be pretty good at it just by default, I would think. He looks like a guy who would be holding a Bud Light in one hand and throwing the cornhole beanbag in like the other and like he'd be nailing it, right?

Yeah. We should have a non-athletic sports Olympics for F*** Face where we all compete against each other with shit like frisbees and cornhole. We should probably bring Jack into the fold as well, because he's really good at all that bar shit. Cornhole is probably good at like swing the hook on. Why do we want to bring in someone good? I don't know. Just to have like a good fucking brags about how good he is at swinging the hook, the hook onto the hook thing. He fucking don't get him started on that. What's the name of swing the hook onto the hook thing? I don, don't get him started on that. What's the name of swing the hook onto the hook thing? I don't know.

You know what we're talking about? Yeah, it's that bar game. It's the string. Swing the hook onto the hook thing? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Like a ring and you got to spin it and land it on a hook.

Get it caught. I think it's just called ring on a hook, isn't it? Hooks. Ring toss and shot. That's it. It just looks like it says hook and ring game. I think, you know, we've been trying to Beef up the

Shoulder content, the non-regulation content I think we've got something here With this whole idea of Sports, of improving ourselves Whether it be getting Eric Better at fucking frisbee Or me eating mayonnaise Although I'd really rather not go down that

road or competing against each other in non-athletic sports. What is this? Go who? Don't use a magnetic dartboard. Yeah, why would you use magnetic darts? Put holes in your wall, Andrew. Come on. Yeah, come on, man. That's motivation not to throw like shit. That's okay. That's the cheapest one.

That's why I sent it. Mm-mm. How about this one? What about a soft tip? Are we okay with a soft tip dart? No, we want a regular dartboard. Okay. Jesus Christ.

Calm down. Regular dartboard. I'm trying to find a regular dartboard. They're tough to find. Well. Regulation dartboard? Oh, man. Now we got to sell regulation sports equipment.

Oh no we don't. Is this a... No. Hey, I'd be interested in all of us playing darts, all of us throwing frisbees, and all of us throwing axes. Yeah. This just sounds like going to a bar.

I'd like to play cornhole against Nick. This is just face bar day. Face bar crawl. Oh, yeah, but some of us don't drink. What about... We don't have to drink alcohol. It's about, but some of us don't drink. What about... We don't have to drink alcohol. It's about the game. What about horseshoes?

What about horseshoes? Do you guys play horseshoes? I haven't thought about horseshoes since I was a kid. I hate horseshoes. I don't think I've done that one. I don't like cornhole either. Oh, that's... Why?

Why don't you like cornhole? Why? Dog shit. What's the problem with it? Just not satisfying. Not satisfying? Too many points? Too many points scored in Cornhole for you?

No, I just don't find it very... What about that one? Not very fulfilling. Hmm. Yeah, isn't it fun to throw a beanbag, though? They're, like, heavy and they're floopy. Yeah, I would say they are. I don't think underarm games are any good.

Oh. Hmm. So you don't like bowling? Cricket? You're floopy? Yeah. I would say they are. I don't think underarm games are any good. Oh. Hmm. So you don't like bowling? Cricket? You're against cricket? I actually don't like bowling. Jeff, you don't like bowling. I don't like bowling.

No, I'm right there with him. I'll agree with him on that one. Did you say cricket? Yeah. It's an underhand throw. No, it isn't. Yeah, it is. You overhand it straight into the ground. No, they do the hand loop, and then they really start that

No, I'm thinking a cricket. They do the like they spin the hand and then it bounces off the ground Yeah, but they are they go over their head. They do like a big run up Yeah, but they release at the bottom they release the bottom do they? Yeah, that goes down into the ground and then up into the bat. Are you serious? Yeah. Cricket throw. Cricket ball.

Dude, I think fast-pitch softball might be the scariest thing in the world. Oh, that's so overhand. That could be more overhand. That is such an overhand. You're trying to murder them. No, I'm wrong. I'm wrong.

You're right. He's out. Has anybody ever invented underhand cricket? Wow. Well, you would underhand if you were maybe like right by the wicket

and someone's... Are you saying that like a softball version of cricket? Yeah, like fast-pitched cricket. What's interesting about cricket and that that angle doesn't show is how far away they are from each other.

That's actually quite a long throw. That's crazy. I really thought it was going to be. I want to see what the distance... Cricket pitch... I hope it's 60 feet 6 inches. It is... Is a cricket pitch 66 feet? The cricket pitch length is 22 yards,

approximately 66 feet in length. So it's only just a little bit further than a uh baseball yeah just a little we compare it to softball though aren't we with an underhand yeah but cricket's overhand yeah cricket's overhand gavin what's baseball isn't underhand yeah baseball's over 60 feet right yeah gavin i don't know again i don't know if you've seen this cricket gif uh so he's throwing overhand and so is baseball um i understand but what's the what what is the comparison you're trying to make?

The distance is about the same. That's all we're saying. Oh. And it's pretty far. It's pretty far. It's so defensive, but not sure over what. I'm saying it would be very difficult to underhand that with any power. It would be very difficult. How do you feel about sidehand?

What are we talking about today? Why is this episode? I was talking about throws. I was like in football, he throws out of the side, the side throw. I always thought the sidearm throw is the best pitch in baseball. It's so cool. I just, I mainly wanted to make a bet with you involving darts, but it sounds like we got a whole other thing happening with these games.

Did you ever say what happened to him? Oh, what do to him? Oh. What do you mean? He's throwing a baseball really hard. It's a sidearm pitch. It's a sidearm throw. Of a Yankee? Throwing sideways?

Very incredibly? I need to see an x-ray of that guy in that moment. Yeah, that's how sidearm is. Where's his spine? That's crazy. Some sidearm guys. Wes's spine. That's crazy. Some sidearm guys. That's what they call them. They used to call them like submarine pitchers.

Oh, you're going to hate this. Oh, Gavin. Oh, you're going to hate this. Gavin, check out baseball. That's a submarine pitcher? What's going on? How about a guy pitching at like ankle level almost? Is this sidearm.

For the audience, we're just showing Gavin pictures of people throwing sidearm halfway through the swing. So their arm is going the wrong way. When I went to the arcade with you, Gavin, that you don't remember, that's how you threw. You were a sidearm thrower. You're a submarine pitcher? He is a submarine pitcher, and he is quite accurate. I look so broken. That's how you throw.

I was shocked by the four, but I couldn't complain. You're getting tickets. Huh. No, was I doing that? You were. You're 100% sidearm thrower. That's so funny. I have a question for you, Gavin,

regarding toting the hole. Very serious question. Okay. What percent British does a person need to be to qualify, would you say, to be on toting the hole? What level of Brit can you stand being around before it's too much? Like if their DNA, if they were like 70 i don't think it's

dna i think it's if you've lived there you lived okay so even if you you genetically had a majority of your ancestry there it doesn't count you have to live there yeah i think you have to have lived in the culture got it okay like i'm i'm half italian i don't do i know anything about italy nope that's fair. Yeah, I was just curious if it was like a sense for you or like based on what Jeff said, you hate all other British people

or European people? No, he doesn't hate all the British people. He doesn't like to be around other British people in America. That clearly makes him uncomfortable. I met a British person at a bar three days ago. Loved it. Had a lovely little chat. So how many many episodes of tone the hole do you think they would have lasted

i think we could have done one episode of tone of the hole really a full episode yeah that's great i'd ask him like you know what brought him to austin all that stuff he said he worked in media yeah i could have done at least an episode of tone of the hole that's great i think it almost becomes worse the further it goes and toad in the hole because that's like the end of the road if you went like 25 episodes with somebody something goes wrong for that toad in the hole becomes like a full-time job and then i toad in the hole though so it's almost i think it's almost more offensive because if you told the whole somebody within five minutes, you don't have an opportunity to really know who they are.

But if you spend 26 episodes of somebody and then towed in the hole, then they're done. You've evaluated it. You've gotten a good sample size and you just think there's nothing else there. Isn't that just on a much longer scale how friendship works? Sort of, I guess. Yeah, but I think this is worse because you don't necessarily say toad in the hole but no you just drift apart from some yeah you you changes people with time but there's not enough time for you to change as a person we're doing a total thing so that wouldn't be the issue but you're right it is a condensed version of it

do we need to recap what toad in the Hole is for the newer listeners? Toad in the Hole is a podcast, I guess, a side show of this show that we joked about doing where Gavin would interview. Not even interview, just have conversations with other British people. And whenever he got sick of the conversation, he'd yell Toad in the Hole and a new British person would take their spot. All based on Jeff saying that I apparently hate all British people that I come across in America. Until three days ago, I would agree. I don't even know that this person exists, to be honest with you. If you didn't record with him, for all I know, you invented

this to strengthen it. He's had this in his back pocket for weeks since he brought it up. He's just been waiting to deploy it. This has been a fascinating episode. How have you guys been doing? We haven't really spoken a lot in the past week. I haven't even

looked at my notes for this week. Really? Do you have many notes? Oh, I have one note. Oh, what's your note? Well, regulation animation came out. It did. People seem to love it. We should mention that. Please watch it. It's on Rooster Teeth. It's on YouTube.

It's not getting as many views as our live action stuff does, and I wish it would because it was a lot more work, and I think it's gorgeous. Oh, way more. Like 50 times more work. Yeah, 5 billion times more work.

Yeah, I watched the early cut, I guess, before it came out, and then when I went to watch it after it came out, I saw that someone had sort of chimed in on the end of it, recording a little bit of live action stuff with uncensored faces. Oh, I did see that.

I mean, it's not really part of the show. It's just a additional piece that they said, hey, can you do this quickly? And then I will say nobody on their end edited it. They just asked me to do this suddenly. Who's day? That was it. That would be animation, I suppose. Right. I mean, do we

let F***face not get bleeped? Where do we do it? Isn't that a general sort of brand wide rule? That stupid rule that we've come up with? Well, I think it's not in the show. Yeah, it is in the show if you put it in the freaking episode. It's not in the episode. It's literally in the YouTube video.

The episode ends and then it goes to that. That's the end. It's before the credits. Yeah, the episode is animation. Yeah, do you think me talking against a wall is animation? That's not drawn Gavin. That's easy. Do you think I'm animation? When I say face is it bleeped I'm with them you're wrong wrong on this. Can I just say... Yeah.

If you watch a fucking movie, the trailers aren't part of the movie. It's a different thing. They're not all the same thing. Things end... How about this? Move on. Well, I get it,

but it's still on our channel. It's not like it's in a Twitter video. In Gavin's defense, is a post-credit scene a part of a movie still? Like, if it's like in a Marvel movie, it probably is, right?

Yeah. I mean, typically a post-credit scene isn't somebody just spiking the camera and going, hey, if you like that, check out comic books.

Yeah. No, that's true. I also, I feel like the post-credits scene rarely has anything to do with the film. It's setting up something else. Sometimes not even canon, really, but... Yeah.

But it's just weird to hear it uncensored. It is. That's why I'm... I would agree with you there. It is strange. It's not like we're talking about it on a different podcast where it wouldn't be censored. It's true.

This is a great... I've been struggling with something for a couple weeks, and this is a great point to mention it. I really hate the name F*** Face at this point. It's really wearing me down. Why? I don't know, man. I go back and forth with it.

I did it to prank myself because I knew I would get here, and I've been here a few times. It comes in waves where I think it's incredibly funny, and then I hate it to prank myself because I knew I would get here. And I've been here a few times, you know? It comes in waves where I think it's incredibly funny, and then I hate it, and then I think it's funny, and then I hate it. And it's like this self-loathing, making fun of myself, enjoying myself kind of thing. But I'm definitely on the like,

I just don't like it right now. It's fucking annoying me. I'll get back to the other side soon, but god damn. Yeah. Well, I mean, you did it. It's your idea. I know, I know. I really like the way it looks in the logo like I love the logo Yeah, it's a pretty logo. So you you think that fish should always be censored Gavin

I think in our content obviously you're gonna if you talk about elsewhere different videos It's not gonna be censored if it's on our channel in our content in the video that we made Yeah, it should be censored. Okay our channel, in our content, in the video that we made, yeah, it should be censored. Okay, I'll ask him to censor it. I'll say, I'll say Gavin said censor this, please. And it's...

I'm not making the call. I'm just throwing it to the group. What does everyone else think? I think that we should endeavor going forward to make sure it's always censored in content that we release under the f***face umbrella. But I think it's folly to go back and re-upload that video. Oh, yeah, don't go back.

I'm just saying, to me, one of the funny gags in F*** Face is that it's censored when you say it that way, but not when you just say the word on its own. I will say. Nice touch. I used to think it was funny, too. Is it not funny anymore? I'm just down on the name right now.

It'll be funny to me again in like a week, I'm sure. I think it's interesting, just going through our texts, I mean, you did make a differentiator in content, but you just use f***face uncensored all the time. Who? You. In our text messages, any mention of f***face, you don't use the censors.

You just spell it. Well, yeah, it's written down. Yeah, but I censor it whenever I write it. Do you really? Every time. That's so much effort to shake it. It absolutely is. But it's written down. Yeah, but I censor it whenever I write it. Do you really? Every time. It's so much effort to shake it. It absolutely is. But it's the name.

It's what it's called. I'm going to search my messages to see if I ever typed it censored. I can't think. I don't think I ever have typed it censored. Am I the only one that's been writing it censored everywhere whenever I talk about it? Probably, yeah.

I'm too committed to the bit, I guess. Maybe I should start doing that. Maybe if I'm kicking off so much about Eric putting it uncensored in a video, maybe I should... It's nice that you're seeing that and I didn't have to say it. Thank you very much. I've already made the ask, though. I mean, I've already done it.

I've already made the ask, so I'm not retracting it. Now we'll see if it happens. Look, I was just throwing this at the group. It wasn't really an action thing. I just thought that was interesting. No, it was an action thing. No, you brought it up. No, it doesn't matter. It was an action thing. No, it was an action thing. No, it doesn't matter.

It was an action thing. No, it was an action thing. It's funny that it's a discussion. Well, we're talking about texts because this perfectly segues into a thing I wanted to bring up for a while. It's been on my notes for a few weeks at this point. Have you ever noticed, Jeff,

that Gavin is a three-ha man and your text conversations with him gavin very rarely goes beyond the three haas occasionally rarely he gives you two haas which is acceptable but i have almost never gotten more than three haas out of gavin and anything i've ever said here's how my ha's work, typically. Like a ha-ha, that's probably same as typing lol, where it's like, did you really lol? Probably not. It's just funny. It's like a... But a three-ha to me is like,

that's funny. That is pretty funny. But any more than that is like I actually burst out laughing. So you just don't actually burst out laughing at anything Andrew ever says? I feel like I have done. I must've given you four haws before. Oh, it happens occasionally.

Very rarely. But I'm saying, I'm asking Jeff, have you ever noticed this? Have you ever, have you ever looked at your haws with Gavin? When, usually when Gavin and I text,

I get seven or eight haws from him, but that's just me. No, I don't know. I will say this though. Uh, two haws in my family is an insult. If somebody responds with two haws,

that's like a thumbs up emoji. That's like a gentle, like, fuck you. It wasn't funny enough. So I'm just going to give you, like, the most basic of haws. If you ever text Emily two haws, she will not be happy. She will think you're upset.

Interesting. Yeah, and I won't. If I text any of you two ha's, she will think you're upset with her. Interesting. Yeah, and I won't... If I text any of you two ha's, that's what it means. It means I wasn't... It wasn't entertained at all. Yeah. I'm not sure how this will make you feel,

but on the 3rd of November and this Sunday, I gave two different people four ha's. You gave four ha's? I gave four ha's to Jason Saldana, who had a funny dream about me, and Daniel Fabello, who sent me a funny edit.

And they both made me laugh out loud. Okay. I have to go so fucking far back in my texts to find a text from Gavin. Jesus Christ. Interesting. Oh my God. The last time

Gavin texted me. Is this when I find out we're not friends anymore? The last time Gavin texted me. I'll be honest. Most of the four ha's I'm receiving. The last time Gavin texted me I think was October 16th. That's not too bad. Three weeks.

I mean I find that people I see in real life a lot or communicate with a lot I don't necessarily text a lot. It's fascinating that you think the two ha's is like an offense because I agree. For me, it's more of just like an acknowledgement that something funny was attempted

or it was mildly. Yeah, something funny was attempted. That's what it means. That is exactly what it means. It's like, oh, you tried. Okay, here you go. I think most often I'll write it after something I've said the haas the floor laughing at yourself the two haas too hot oh i see yeah sometimes it can be used as like a tone setter yeah like i just did this

dumb thing yeah exactly hey we're again would you do me a favor could you try to throw a couple of extra haws Andrew's way every once in a while? I think emotionally he could use it. No, I've definitely sent him four haws. I just feel like we need to find out what caused them. You know he's trying, so just be a little more liberal with your haws.

We're 55 minutes in, and I just realized, weren't we supposed to do the stupid Icy Hot again because Eric bitched out last time? Oh, shit. We were. No. I think we were, right?

Eric and Nick didn't do it, and so we were going to have to go one more time so that all five of us could be miserable at the same time. That was going to, yeah. That was supposed to happen. No, I said no then. Thank God we're doing two episodes today, right? Why is Eric not saying anything about it?

Oh, I don't have Icy Hot. Oh my God! That's, that's tragic. I could put like, you want me to use like regular lotion? And I could pretend like, ah! Like, oh no! So goopy. Goopy?

That's what you'd say? So goopy? Yeah, is it goopy? No. I'm going to get you a lifetime supply of Icy Hot for Christmas, Eric. I mean, a lifetime supply for me, I think, would probably be just the one tube because I don't use it for anything. So thank you.

I'll get you at least 10. Yeah. No. If you can make me cookies again, that would be great. That was a great Christmas gift one time. I'm sure I will. Do you think, Jeff, that Eric snuck in the sneaky animal question before we started just to throw us off track so we couldn't you couldn't be oh no if you would have brought up the icy hot thing right at

the beginning i would have told you i didn't have it i don't care the sneaky animal thing i still i'm still kind of flummoxed that we don't know what the sneakiest animal is that you still think it's a fish for some reason uh it doesn't make sense to me i just think it's you're always surprised we don't need to go over old ground though yeah you should have had it but i'm okay that you don't oh i found a ha ha ha ha congrats to andrew feb 19th you said just pause to fix the technical difficulty i don't this, but apparently last time I was streaming this for you, I didn't have any audio. I said it was just game audio.

Wasn't it? You said, no, apparently not. Just lost my save to reset audio for the audience. Oh, my misery. My pain is what brings. My pain is the four haas. That was four haas. Because I was, I think I just just landed i was in the airport just laughing

okay so my misery telling stories about dreams that you're in and edits are what i need if i want to consist if i want to bump up my four ha writing you can't you can't try and force a four ha no i No. I five or six or seven-ha you in real life on face. Yeah, but that's different. That's for work. It is. Do you think, like you're performing here. This isn't even the real you.

This is the character you play on internet content. That's one of my favorite criticisms we get of all time is that we're playing characters. That's awesome. That's so funny. Do you think, Andrew, now that if and when the next time you receive

a four or five ha from Gavin that you'll believe it's true? Or do you think now at some point, somewhere in the back of your mind you're always going to question, is he just, you know, is he just entertaining me?

Is he being kind to me right now by giving me four ha's? Is it really four ha's? Or is he channeling that conversation we had and trying to cut me some slack? Yeah, I think there's definitely going to be a reviewing and there will be scrutiny. Like if I don't think it deserves four Haas,

but it gives me four Haas, I'd call him out on it. All you're doing is making me self-conscious about how many Haas I'm giving. I've got to try and not let it affect me. Well, he's pretty self-conscious about how many Haas he's receiving from you, so it sounds like you're on equal footing now. No, it's just I remember I got four haas,

and I was like, I never get four haas, because, Jeff, you're very generous with your haas. So am I, I feel like. I enjoy laughing. Yeah, me too. I enjoy a good laugh. What's the point of living if you're not laughing? I know it would be a problem if you only gave more than three haas.

That'd be a psychotic move. If ever, no matter what it was, at least five, I'd be terrified of that person. Hmm. I found that funny, but my character didn't.

What? Oh, I see. Could you believe we get to do this again in five minutes? I can't. Me too. I didn't even get to my dumb notes. I'm so excited to see your notes.

I don't have that many and they're not that good. Great. Thanks for listening to another episode of the F*** Face Podcast. Who knows what's in store for us next week? Will I eat the mayonnaise? Will Eric improve his frisbees?

Will Gavin be liberal with the Haas? You'll have to tune in to find out. Aww. F*** face. Hey, guys. Major League fan Jack here with a look at next week's episode of F*** Face. Did Gavin take the best photo ever? Jeff gets passionate about milk.

Andrew doesn't understand technology. What will the Thanksgiving episode be like? The boys like physical receipts. Let's see those mouse pads. And once again, Andrew does not eat the pencil. All that and more on next week's episode of F*** Face.