Regulation Podcast - Gurple in Vegas // Somebody's Last Straw [166]
Episode Date: August 9, 2023Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about Nick's a movie guy, Summer of 98 baseball, Chewbacca, back in time, outside food, the sphere, same shirts, poop brain, in bed early, cement mixers, grango, wetware,... the sticks, and being somebody's last straw. The Break Show is now weekly! Watch it every Monday at 4pm CT on Rooster Teeth or the F**kface Youtube channel. The recorded episode will go up Thursday for FIRST, Friday for everyone else. Sponsored by Babbel http://babbel.com/FACE and Factor Meals http://factormeals.com/face50 and use code face50 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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🎵
Hello and welcome to another episode of the F*** Face Podcast.
My name is Jeff Ramsey. With me, as always, the other people.
This is episode 166.
How's everybody doing?
Nick, are you a movie guy?
You love movies?
Yeah.
We had to wait a week for that answer. We did. We had to wait a while. Nick, are you a movie guy? You love movies? Yeah. Good.
We had to wait a week for that answer.
We did.
We had to wait a while, but I got it.
I got to the bottom.
We were just talking about Summer of 98 movies.
I was just curious how many people had seen.
I wasn't sure if you were a movie guy or not.
Big movie guy.
I need to look through the list, though, of all the 98 stuff.
Fair enough.
Yeah, we found out that I'd seen 10, and Jeff had seen...
24, I believe.
24.
I counted.
It was like 18 or 19 wow uh speaking of summer of 98 I googled summer of 98 just to see what would come up there was a book created uh written called
summer of 98 when homers flew records fell and baseball reclaimed America by Mike Lupica it was
I guess about when Mark McGuire and Sammy Sosa were having this
steroid off to hit the most illegal home runs.
Well, have you seen what's happening
next year? No.
A Creed show. Oh, right.
Summer of 99. Creed is doing
Summer of 99
with three doors down.
What?
So they acknowledge that this is Summer of 98
and they don't want to step on our toes.
If so facto, vis-a-vis, they must.
So does that mean if we if the summer of 98 stuff goes well, does that mean that next year we have to do the summer of 2000 because the summer of 99 has been covered?
Oh, we're like trading off.
Well, yeah, because the summer of 99 will be next.
Also, that doesn't make any sense.
Why are they doing it in April if because the summer of 99 will be next also that doesn't make any sense why are they doing it in april if it's summer of 99 yeah i don't yeah at least we
waited till summer yeah no i think i think we still have to cover i think if if we feel good
about summer in 98 again which i truly do believe is like the last good year um then then we got to
do summer in 99 you know what You're really winning me over.
And this realization that 98 was the year
McGuire broke the record is pretty crazy.
I had forgotten that.
And it's the year I got out of the Army.
Wow.
Good year.
Yeah, it was the year I moved back to Austin
and met Gus and Bernie.
So you take the good with the bad, I guess.
We're like firmly out of the steroid era of baseball, right?
At this point?
Or is it still?
I mean, we're in the hidden steroid era of baseball.
That's what you mean.
So it's safe to assume.
If you're a Padres fan, the not so hidden era of steroids.
He had ringworm or whatever.
Yeah.
Tainted supplements.
I just know like in the NFL, it doesn't happen often, but it's like the tests are so obvious
you can work around it.
I wasn't sure what like baseball's regulations were.
It's the same.
What percentage of home run balls do you think are tainted?
Are steroid balls?
At this point, I don't know if it's a majority, but it's probably got to be pretty close.
Has to be a lot, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
it's a majority but it's probably got to be pretty close has to be a lot right yeah yeah that one would if you caught like one of mcguire's balls would you would that change your opinion on it
learning like post steroid like in a pre-world where people realized was it always known like
how common was the knowledge of steroid usage in baseball during the like mcguire i mean record
setting dude there was a period in time where Sammy Sosa
Barry Bonds and Mark McGuire all doubled in size yeah yeah Barry Bonds from where he ended up to
where he started in the league is a different human being yeah in a way that is like hard to
hard to understand yeah it's it's really... Naturally.
Really crazy.
And I think a lot of it has to do with, like,
his head size. I mean, like, his head got so big.
Oh, wow.
Like, his head in that first photo
is inside of a helmet.
The photo of his head in the second part on the right,
it looks like he has the helmet
on it's so big he looks like when pac-man would eat the power-up pellet yeah like it's larger
i know i know that like you know it there's growth and there's time but it's just like
that is wild i think it was also very known with guys like
kinseiko and a bunch of that so like it it was a pretty i would say open secret and then
i think like the government got involved and that's when it was like oh can you believe this
and everyone goes yes we believe it and that's yeah like he could be inside of what he became
you know like in men in black where like yeah, like he could be inside of what he became, you know, like a men in black
where like they reveal like the little alien inside the human.
He could just be that he could just be inside himself.
That's crazy.
I didn't know how much he doubled men in summer of 97.
Yeah, should we go forward or backwards?
You think we should do 99 or 97 if we like how 90?
I mean, we could we don't have to be linear with it.
We could pick summer of 2006 if we want to next.
That's fair.
That's a good point.
I mean, summer 98 was an arbitrary.
Well, it wasn't arbitrary, but I mean, it doesn't have any like mathematical tie to 2023.
Sure.
Summer of 06, I went to Acon in Dallas.
Yeah?
I was there.
How was that? I met Chewbacca.
I got a picture with him. Really?
Yeah. Wow. And it was
a real picture, too. As opposed to a
fake one? Well, they printed it and gave it to me.
Oh, did you have to
pay extra for the print? Oh, I'm sure I did.
And because of that, I don't know where it is anymore.
But it happened.
I was about to ask if you still have it, but I guess not.
I got it somewhere.
I just have no idea where.
Oh, man.
Hey, I'm looking at the Vegas notes, Gav, and I have one I don't understand.
I wrote down Gavin's driver.
What is that?
Does that mean anything to you?
My driver.
Your Uber driver with Jack.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
We're just very different people, Jack and myself.
Ah.
He had a conversation with our driver that didn't stop for the entire ride from the airport to the hotel.
It was like 25 minutes of just incredibly loud conversation.
Did you feel pressure?
Yeah.
I felt like, oh, now I should be chiming in.
But usually I would sit down and be really quiet and be like, yeah, this hotel.
Thank you.
Really?
And then not really say anything.
In your experience, because you use a lot of Uber drivers, are they typically quiet?
Yeah.
Really?
See, I've had the exact opposite.
I've been in, and my Uber experience is being in a car and them immediately initiating conversation.
And then me getting annoyed with the other people
i'm in the car with that they're not saying a word and i'm having to talk to this person
i'm doing the all of the lifting when i don't want to be doing any of it but nobody else but
do you want to talk no oh because jack jack was loving it jack oh jack was the charge on it okay
or jack is somewhere in Austin right now
telling a story to one of his friends
about how he was in this fucking annoying Uber ride
with Gavin who wouldn't help out
and the Uber driver wouldn't stop talking
and Jack had to do all the heavy lifting.
Well, the best part is that I heard the conversation
multiple times because Jack then retold
the things he was talking to the driver about
as more people arrived on this trip.
So I was really beaten down by it but yeah i feel
like i don't know i just not very i'm not very chatty no i yeah i agree i'm with you i don't
want to talk to people i know let alone strangers so andrew andrew you're doing something wrong
then because you're clearly giving a lot in response to the first uh few questions that
lead them to believe you're a talker.
Oh, it's, you know,
just like some people,
maybe it was like Jack was driving,
essentially,
where some people are talkers in that situation.
And I don't,
I would rather be uncomfortable
talking to them
than just like not acknowledging it at all
and it turning awkward socially.
So I just had to lay on that grenade
and I kept waiting
for the cavalry to arrive
the four people in the back seat and nobody said a fucking word whole trip i guess i don't i don't
activate when there's a silence like i don't see a silence or like a long conversation is like
an awkward thing to be filled i love i love a group that i could just share a silence with
oh yeah it's a great stronger friendship almost but it's it's depending on
the person there might not be an acknowledgement that that was uh like a choice or decision
they might view that as like oh i just had the wrong approach let me try this and then it could
spiral they could just keep on attempting to initiate and it just uh uh it's awkward so
awkward for me to just think about. It's constant delays.
It's just like not continuing that.
I hate it.
So I'd rather just jump in.
I think you secretly love it.
But that could just be my anxiety.
That could just be me, like, anticipating that that is a scenario that would happen
when in reality, that's never how that's going to play out.
Well, I remember we've tested out some silences on this show, and you've been very uncomfortable trying to fill them i feel like they need to be filled what like this silence
yeah see i'm just talking i don't even have anything to say i'm just feeling silence right
now that wasn't even a point but it's also an anxiety thing maybe i've been ripping old like
home videos i got a thing that lets me convert it to my computer, which is partially maybe why I had technical difficulties in the last episode.
And I'm watching stuff and I'm fine when I'm like a baby.
I'm like watching tapes of me like under the age of one.
I was getting anxious watching me at like three and four at Christmas, even though I have no ability to change the convert or not the conversation, but like the that are happening I'm just watching going like fucking don't don't screw up like don't
cause a nuisance like don't just relax calm down you don't need to be screaming right now why are
you screaming why are you screaming don't grab that kid's toy like don't cause problem it's
terrible what is wrong with you me yeah and that the problem. I know how dumb I was, especially at that age,
but I don't remember the actions that I did in that moment.
So I'm just watching going like, you're a fucking idiot.
You're going to cause problems for people.
That kid is so excited.
Were you worried that you'd topple over?
No, wasn't worried about that.
I figured that out later.
I do.
I need to clip it so badly.
There's a shot of me laying down when I'm like seven months old and my fucking nose
looks unbreakable.
Even then it like it stands out how unbreakable my nose is.
Next time we record, I'll see if I get clipped that and bring it to the show.
But surely a nose that stands out is more breakable.
No, trust me.
You're going to look at it and go like that's solid.
Right.
It stands out as structurally sound.
Yeah.
Okay. Well, to be fair, every every time. It stands out as structurally sound. Yeah. Okay.
To be fair, every time I've seen you as a baby,
I've been expecting a certain level of it,
and then I'm absolutely gobsmacked with the result.
So I believe you fully.
Do you think that the Vancouver child,
obviously not Andrew,
because there's no proof that Andrew is the Vancouver child kicker.
Just a lot of really heavy circumstantial evidence
and hearsay.
Do you think that maybe,
I never got into the psychology of the VCK,
but do you think it's possible
that he or she or they might kick children
because they're transcribing videos of themselves
as children and there's a deep-seated self-hatred
and they're not really kicking these strange kids
on the street,
but they're really kicking themselves? Yeah, because they're not small enough to kick anymore so they have to find
some other vessel to kick something to think about yeah would the vancouver child kicker if
they could go back in time exclusively kick themselves but they're limited due to technology
it's like it'd be like you know that whole scenario like if you could go back in time
and shoot baby hitler would you it'd be like like if you could go back in time and shoot baby Hitler,
would you?
It'd be like,
if Hitler could go back
in time and shoot himself
as a baby,
would he?
Why would he?
I don't think he would.
I mean,
he shot himself later,
right?
Yeah.
Did he?
Yeah,
he fucking blew his brains
out in a bunker.
I thought it was a pill. I thought it was a cyanide thing. Oh, was it? I think so. How did he? Yeah, he fucking blew his brains out in a bunker. I thought it was a pill.
I thought it was a cyanide thing.
Oh, was it?
I think so.
There's always such dilemma with like, would you go back and blow baby Hitler's head off?
But I mean, like, why not give it a try?
Like, why wouldn't you do it?
Why not give it a try?
Yeah, I mean, it couldn't go any worse.
Are you saying that there's a large number of people advocating against killing Hitler?
Yeah, it's like the whole moral dilemma of the butterfly effect.
You could end up with, you know, 16 Hitlers or something.
I don't, but I don't think the phrasing of it, I think, is maybe, I don't think a lot of people are struggling over the choice of should Hitler have died.
I think
there's a consensus on that.
Prior to. So you would go back
and off little baby?
Yeah. If it's Hitler?
Yeah. And how are you
doing it? Are you...
I haven't thought about it. Jesus Christ.
Nah, he blew his brains out.
Really? Yeah.
April 30th, 1945. i feel like it's always portrayed
and blew his shitty racist hitler little brains up what a weird conversation so i think i think
my favorite part of the vegas trip was that everybody was in bed by midnight every night
i like my friends my friends were also go to bed early it was i was a little scared that I would have to be up to like four in the morning
trying to keep it rolling.
And that was not the case.
I mean,
it didn't,
it didn't help that I woke up at five the first day,
but I mean,
it was,
to be fair,
it was,
that was the case for Jack.
He was up gambling till like 4am every night.
Like Saturday night when we all went home,
we all came home from Meow Wolf and went to bed.
He walked down to Treasure Island and gambled for like three more hours.
He was mad that we all
ended that craps game. I think
we were all up and then we just called it a day
because it was getting close to
11.30 or something. Oh, right.
We went to Celebration Station
to gamble or whatever.
Yeah, and he was not ready to leave.
We just started walking away, just leaving
without him. We just backed away
slowly. Well, here's why.
Because there's this thing you can do in craps where you bet a full line.
So you bet that you're going to roll the 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, and 12 before you roll 7.
Which insinuates that you're going to be rolling for a long time.
So I walked up to Jack and I said, hey, man, everybody's tired.
I think we're going to go home now.
And Jack said, cool, man.
Yeah, I'll join you.
And then I watched him hit that and hit all the numbers at once as if to say, I'm going
to now do this.
And so I just started backing away.
And then I just went straight.
I just I walked all the way outside and just got an Uber.
Then he had to run to meet us at the Uber
because he crapped out.
And then he's like,
well, I want to ride back though.
And then had to run
to meet us as the car came.
And then we had to put
seven people in a Uber.
Yep.
That's why I changed
the group chat name
to Will Knees Patillo
make the car in time.
But we should because we teased in the last episode,
you should talk about the security incident
at the basketball game, Jeff.
So my soon-to-be father-in-law, Dwight,
is kind of like a food explorer.
He's like one of those dudes that likes to
try out new stuff wherever he goes to,
and he always kind of looks up the cool thing
or the interesting foods and flavors at the place he's going to.
He's a lot of fun to go to Italy with,
uh,
because of that.
He's very adventurous.
Um,
and so he discovered this place in Vegas.
He's really into birria tacos right now.
Like they're like his favorite thing.
And he discovered this place in Vegas that sells birria tacos and birria
bao buns.
Um,
which is insane. Now, what is a birria taco and birria bao buns which is insane
now what is a birria taco? Eric you can probably
explain it better because
you've had them longer it's like a
fried taco I guess
it's a taco
like more of like a I don't want to say like
hard shell because it's not necessarily a hard shell
it's just it's a taco
usually with beef and then you dip it into
yeah like cheese because it keeps it all together it's just it's a taco usually with beef and then you just be into yeah the like shredded cheese
because it keeps it all together um and then you dip it into like i guess lack of a better term
like an au jus or like a stew um and so you're dipping these tacos in and getting a bite and it
has like it's just like so much more flavor because you're getting so much in each bite. Yeah. It's like a cross between a taco and a French dip.
Yeah.
I'd say that's pretty close.
Yeah.
And so the idea of like this fusion birria bao bun was pretty fucking exciting.
And so we were talking about wanting to figure out a way to go to that restaurant and get them.
And because we had this nice little sweet area that y'all set up for whoever.
Thank you so much for that I don't know, whoever.
Thank you so much for that, by the way.
Where we were behind the backboard,
and we had access to a table and sofas,
and little hot dogs and shit you could have.
It was actually kind of like what we did with the Brahmas,
but a little nicer.
Not that the Brahmas thing wasn't nice.
I'm not insinuating that it wasn't. It was just, you know.
And so he just asked a lady
that was working there who was like i don't know getting drinks and stuff he said hey can we bring
outside food food and drinks in we probably can't do that right and she goes oh no you can here we
don't mind and he goes really and she goes yeah it's not a thing here uh he goes she's like i know
most places probably wouldn't let you but we really don't care and he's like oh okay yeah she was like stuffed it all the time yeah he's like stuffed it all the time and
so he he and i looked at each other and we're like what do you think and he's like i don't know and
i was like yeah i don't know so we asked the second person and the other person told us the
same thing and so we were like okay so i uber eats a bunch of the birria tacos and birria bao
buns to us and then it took like an hour and then we went and
stood outside in 125 degrees in a parking lot and waited for him to show up shit myself and passed
out and then when i came back around we would we go to walk back in go to the go to the security
intro entrance and the guy goes the fuck do you think you're doing and we're like excuse me and
he's like you can't bring outside food and drinks in here and it's like aggressively angry at us and we were like um we got permission and he's like
from who and we're like i don't know the lady that said we could do it and the other guy that
said we could do it and he's like well they're not me and we're like okay man you know we're
not trying to cause a problem here we just they said that we could do it they said it wasn't a
big deal we're in this nba experience thing over there and he's like yeah you can't do it and he just like
kind of just like just like kind of berated us for a minute and it was kind of annoying and you
know dwight and i are about to go like okay man we'll just eat them outside fuck it's not the end
of the world you know and there goes you know what i'm gonna let you in this time and i was like
we're like this will be the only time you know we're like, this will be the only time. We won't be back tomorrow.
And so
he lets us in, and we go, and we sit
down, and we unpack the tacos on the
table, and the lady, we start
eating them, and two minutes in
to eating them, like I've eaten one taco,
the lady who told us we could bring them in
comes over and goes, you guys have
to get rid of those tacos right now.
And we're like, what? She's like, they can't be out where people can see them.
And we're like, excuse me?
She goes, I got in so much trouble.
You are not allowed to bring food in here.
I was wrong.
It's only for staff.
They can't be visible.
I got to take you guys to a special place to eat them
because you can't have them here.
And we're like, what?
And so we start to package it all up.
I'm listening to this and I'm just stuffing my fat face.
I'm just trying to get it all as much down as possible.
And we're like, okay, well, can you save our seats?
And she goes, I can't do that either.
If you leave, somebody else can take them.
And we're like, because it's in like this little lounge area.
And we're like, so I was like, you guys go eat the tacos.
I had mine.
I'll sit here and hold the space.
And so they went and ate the tacos, the rest of the tacos.
I only had one. And I just sat there by myself
until they came back dumbest fucking
thing I've ever seen
they like
stuffed us in the
what was it the NBA experience
you're saying like they stuffed us
in there that we couldn't even
access that area with our
like insane seats
that were very very good yeah the
nba experience thing is like a whole other ticketed thing and they told us to go fuck
ourselves and they went yeah just here be here you just sit there were more people around us in
there once you can see it they could see us in our seats and then according to dwight y'all just stood over a trash can and stuffed your faces guiltily
Gavin's trying to send dong files
why are all my pictures dongs now
is this one a dong
Gavin's files are converting to sleep spaghetti
that's a dong file also
this is really cool
people have been complaining
how come these guys just don't learn how to use discord already i fucking hate discord and i refuse to learn it
it's also the difference between using we're using it on the desktop and our phones at the same time
and i'm sorry but uploading photos on phone to discord why did you take a picture of the back of
me uh you were really pissed off that the uber driver was driving away from us instead of picking us up. And it was 47 degrees.
And I just thought that was the perfect.
This fucking woman refused to drive over to the pickup area and like would not do it.
Drove around in circles.
Security is like pointing her in.
She is fucking ignoring them.
There's no shade.
It is 112 degrees and i'm just standing in a fucking ditch surrounded
by shrubs going what the fuck are you doing what the fuck are you doing what you can't see is that
there were about 12 people stood under the shadow of a tree that's where i'm taking that from we're
all just like shuffling trying to get off the burning sunlight.
Miserable.
I've got a clip I can show.
You have a clip?
From Vegas.
Let me see if I can share this
window. Is it going to be a
dong video? Because I really, I don't...
This might be dong, actually.
While you're doing that,
I'm going to upload a photo of the uh
just of the place where we were at just so andrew can see the nba experience yeah
it was andrew it was really cool it was awesome oh wow what have you it was unlimited food
unlimited drinks like it it was fucking awesome we just we posted up it was great. It was great. You were like having
a bunch of beers. I sucked down a couple of
Bloody Marys. I had every Diet Coke
in the building. I actually had Diet Pepsi.
They had Diet Pepsi.
This is the coolest thing I've ever seen
in my fucking life.
Oh, the sphere.
Yeah, the new Madison Square Garden sphere thing.
Holy shit.
It was cool twice.
Once when it was a basketball,
and the other time when it was a moon,
and we were driving back to the strip,
and it felt like you were on another planet.
It looks so cool.
The pictures don't do it justice.
I didn't realize how new it was.
They've only turned it on in the last month or so.
Yeah, I would say it's about three weeks old.
Very recent.
Maybe a month old at this point.
And one of our group asked the driver to go buy it
so they could see it, and apparently it was off.
That was me.
Dwight and I, we asked the guy, we said,
hey, can you drive us by the Sphere?
We want to see it at night.
And he goes, yeah, sure, man, I'll drive you by, no problem.
It was on the way back on Saturday night.
It's about 11 o'clock at night.
So he swings by, he drives it back,
and it's pitch black, it's off.
And we go, oh, it's off.
And he goes, oh, yeah, they turn it off
at like nine o'clock now.
We're like, you mother fu-
Why didn't you fucking tell us that?
The moon was the coolest, I think.
Yeah, the moon was when we got done with Meow Wolf
and we were leaving Area 15,
which was very cool.
Very cool place.
Met a lot of people and everything.
Met a lot of cool people there.
Met the facilities manager there.
That dude was awesome.
Really, really cool.
And then driving back to the strip,
that thing
was lit up so bright as the moon and rotating it was it gave you like an uneasy feeling it was
very very cool it looked quite real did they still have the uh gerbil drink at meow wolf yeah yeah
yeah i took a picture i took a picture of uh these two with thepel drink. I'll drop it in here in just a second.
But like fantastic.
Yeah.
Vegas for Jeff's bachelor party.
I don't have like enough time in the world to say how much fun I had.
It was me too, man.
It was surprising.
Jeff was so cool.
Summer League was so cool.
It was it was just so much fun.
The summer photo looks like a disheveled version of the end of
oceans.
11.
Looking out at the table.
Yep.
That photo of Jack with the planet behind them.
How cool is that?
And then here's,
here's these two.
They're groping.
Uh,
they got bigger.
They had big gerbil.
Whoa.
Yeah.
Oh,
wow.
Okay. So you have a clip, Gavin. Yeah Gavin Yeah if you want you see my stream
See it there oh there it is okay here I come
I see the back of Jeff
I'd merely said to Jeff
I merely said
You and Eric plan this
And Jeff was like what are you talking about
I was like you're shit dude
And then Jeff was on a mission
He's trying to get a peek What are you talking about? I was like, your shirt, dude. And then Jeff was on a mission.
He's trying to get a peek.
Okay.
You can't see.
Yeah.
All right.
I'll go change.
Yeah, you are.
That's what you're doing. both wearing the bootleg Zimmer RTX shirt
little face boys
heading out to be our wolf
and they were like oh what if it's gonna change
I was like absolutely not
so nobody changed
so that was Eric and I
hanging out the rest of the night in the same shirt.
I had a funny realization about RTX, the most recent one that we had.
So like last year we sold grown tubes.
Right.
And there are people in the company that complained of like, why are we giving the people their
noise making devices?
That's a terrible idea i saw a post
about how we were some posted in our subreddit that one of the items we were selling this year
for rtx was a pizza cutter advising people if they bought one you could not carry like it could
not go in your carry-on you would have to check that bag to get it which made me realize how dumb we are we gave
the audience noisemakers the first rtx we did merch for we armed the audience for the second
rtx we did we gave them knives we just sold knives in the middle of the convention center
and there are no complaints about it but i never thought about it to that point that we just
armed everybody i don't know if you
could have entered rtx with a pizza slicer but if you walked out would you be allowed back in with
you yeah i don't know i would love to know that if someone tried to get blocked that'd be hilarious
i just i never considered until after the fact that we allowed people to have weapons in the
middle of the hall they would have just peace bonded it.
It's a knife.
I'd never even hear it.
It's like a sharp knife.
Yeah, it's a circular knife.
They just spray orange.
Maybe next year we'll do a mace or something.
Oh, maybe.
Yeah.
Cool.
That's a good idea.
Bear spray.
It's a good idea. Bear spray. It's a tiny explosive.
Jeff, do you have any other Vegas notes?
I don't think so.
Just that I had the best time of my life and that you all are wonderful
and I love you dearly
and it was just a really great, great time.
It was totally worth surprising you.
Oh, I did have, like, I will say, like,
I think it was maybe Sundayay night eric and i were
hanging out in the uh or maybe sunday i guess breakfast it was when you and i were hanging
out in the sports book oh in the sports book yeah yeah sunday morning and we sat down and we talked
for maybe an hour and a half about face and it was so much fun we just bounced around ideas and
just got so many ideas and came up with a bunch of
show concepts.
And man, just that that was a really like that was really fun.
That that period.
Oh, it's great.
Yeah.
Yeah, it really was.
Yep.
It was just like a really focused, relaxed time.
And we were just like it was almost moments where like just the ideas are flowing, you
know, those cool.
Yeah, that's great.
We should do a thing.
it was cool yeah that's great we should do a thing i was thinking where we just have like a an idea pitch and make like a document of concepts that's a great idea because i feel like we have a
lot of things that are like kind of in the works maybe in our head on top of i think we have content
that we've forgotten about that we just haven't posted for later but just uh like we did a uh
does it do season two thing yeah that i just i forgot we did a Does It Do season two thing. Yeah.
That I just, I forgot we did.
Well, that has to come out off the Does It Do season two.
Yeah, that has to.
Absolutely, yeah.
But I'm just saying, I forgot that that was even a thing we did until the other day.
And I think that's good content.
I'm excited about that, actually.
And I'm excited we will get to Does It Do here before too terribly long.
I think it's in process now.
So, is that right, Eric?
We'll be filming it by
September, October, I think, right?
I hope so. Yeah, we'll see. This is a great
question for someone else. Okay, fair
enough.
If it was up to me, we'd do it tomorrow. We have other stuff.
You realize that we have, like, Fuck Face Off
coming soon. We have to do that.
That's true. Well, we did some logo
work today. That was fun.
Did you guys see that
report that pooping only every three or more days is linked with cognitive decline no yeah which uh
if you think about it so if you don't shit enough you get dumber okay so uh i gotta be einstein
yeah no you you gotta be up there i'm shitting four times a day right now.
I got to be the smartest dude on Earth.
Here's the thing, though. You binge drank for years, which damaged the brain cells.
So maybe you're actually just back at even because you're shitting so much.
But the alcohol really fucked you.
So if you didn't go through the alcohol thing, you would be Einstein.
And unfortunately, that brought you to our level.
Yeah, so now I'm just getting back to normal.
Yeah.
I'm shitting my way back to average intelligence.
Yeah.
Okay, I like that.
I'll take that.
But you know what?
You're looking really fucking cool doing it.
You got the shades on.
You look great.
I do.
I definitely wear my shit shades every chance I get.
I do. I do. I definitely wear my shit shades every chance I get.
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I'm really glad, Jeff, that you brought up that you were,
you're glad that all the other people, all the friends that went to outside of Jack Vegas thing in bed early because I've been going through
a I'm really fucking boring crisis a little bit I had that for the first time you're saying you're
the most boring of us three I oh I'm not saying that I'm just saying I'm having a crisis and
realizing how boring I am which is something like I'm aware I'm boring.
But then coming to terms with the specifics and the extent to which I'm boring has been alarming.
Like I went into bed early the other night.
I like crawled into bed at 845 and I was so fucking excited to be in bed early because I had time to get cozy and have a good sleep.
And like since that point, I have been so excited about getting into bed early.
It has completely shifted my schedule.
I typically would stay up pretty late.
Now I'm an early bed guy because it brings me genuine joy
anticipating getting comfortable and then just having a good sleep.
I feel like you've been sick recently.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah.
So like getting sleep has been an issue, but it's normalizing.
But I've just been so excited about it.
So maybe you're right.
Maybe that will go away.
What won't go away is we had a conversation in the past about when our childhood experience
died, when we could no longer, you know, I used to pretend that I was a knight on a battlefield fighting guys and like with the sword and run around.
And then we just couldn't do that anymore.
And we lost a part of ourselves.
I realized the other night I didn't lose it.
It's just really fucking boring.
Now I lay in bed pretending it's raining.
I listen to rain and pretend it's raining outside.
And I imagine that
and that is as deep as my imagination now gets as an adult there are no more battles there are no
more wars all i do is pretend it's raining outside i'm imagining weather i stink like that sucks
that's so fucking boring embrace the boring it's like a warm boring blanket i love it does it make you
feel worse when it's actually raining because then technically you're not actually you're not
imagining anything it's just what's really happening that would yeah i would i'd be lost
if it actually rained i guess now like i'll pay attention to it i don't know what i'll do maybe
i'll like listen to a beautiful warm beach when it's raining outside maybe i have to change the
weather to some beach oh just
the sea yeah just like an ocean like a wave sound and like i imagine because like it's not like you
know when you hear rain like i'm adding my own visuals to what that is i just do the same for
waves i guess i don't know but yeah i realized that like no it's not that i've stopped like
pretending things i'm just pretending weather now and that sucks that's such a sad realization yeah i was it's like you bet i couldn't sleep i was like i
fucking i'm boring i'm so goddamn boring pretending weather i don't know man i think
it sounds awesome so are you bummed when you wake up there? Are you like, oh, I don't get to be comfortable anymore?
Um, no.
Because I get excited about getting comfortable that evening.
I immediately, like the anticipation.
By 11, I'm fucking excited.
I'm going to crawl in the bed. I got my AirPods all charged up because of you, Gavin.
I got the cable.
I'm all ready to go if I want to get the rain going.
I'm situated. We go if I want to get the rain going I'm situated with the complete opposite I wake up
and I'm so excited that there's so much of the day
left and when the day is running out I'm just
like oh well no I'm not
listen I'm not giving up on the
day I'm excited about the day but
I'm anticipating that late night
getting cozy as well
I'm pretty excited about it are you thinking about that
before breakfast
uh getting cozy as well. I'm pretty excited about it. Are you thinking about that before breakfast?
Uh, you know, I'm not a big breakfast guy. I typically will go straight to lunch.
So that's a tough, uh, no, you'll have lunch at like 10 or you just won't eat breakfast.
I just won't eat breakfast most of the time. Yeah. Cause you know, I wasn't into cereal because I didn't drink milk as a kid.
So it's just like I'm not an eggs guy.
So it's like breakfast is not a great meal.
I love waffles, but no, that's any time food.
Getting into bed and laying in bed is so fucking nice and comfortable that I'm like most nights
I'm sitting in my living room watching TV and it's like 815 and I'm like, most nights I'm sitting in my living room watching TV and it's like 8.15 and I'm
like, it's too early.
And I have to force myself to stay in the living room until nine so I can just go lay
in bed and watch TV for another 45 minutes before I fall asleep.
There's nothing better than ending the day in a comfortable horizontal position in your
bedroom.
Yes.
Ugh.
Ugh.
The only-
And I wake up excited about the day just like gavin
does i'm just i'm excited about every aspect of it from just getting to to be alive and to do the
day to very excited to get to be in bed the only problem with it for me and it's a time zone issue
i get into bed now at like let's say nine ish or 9 30 at the very latest and i get all cozy i get all
comfortable and then i'll go through a thing of like i want to check in on my friends i want to
see how jeff is doing and gavin's doing it's 11 30 for you guys and i this is like it's too late
i'm not gonna text you at 11 30 at night just to say hi like this is past the time you can
answer you in the morning i'll text you whenever okay well now i'll start doing that because
genuinely i'd say almost every day of the week,
I think like, ah, I really want to check in with you guys.
It'll be like 8.45.
Are you worried about like waking us up?
Yeah, I don't want to disturb you in some way.
I just feel like there's a cutoff time for like a text or...
No, there's not a cutoff time for this level of friendship.
I may not respond to you, but it won't be because I'm annoyed.
It'll just be because I'm sleeping.
Yeah, my phone goes do not disturb when I'm charging it,
which is pretty much only when I'm asleep.
That's great.
Does your phone have a
nighttime setting? A dim setting?
Yeah.
Like where it changes shade for night?
Yeah, it goes yellowish so it doesn't
cause some chemical in your brain.
I don't know how to turn that off, so mine just
goes from 4am.m to 401
a.m i had to update my phone in the world yeah well i don't i don't want it my screen one night
i don't know how i turned it on i was like oh fuck my screen is orange everything is orange
i couldn't figure out what was going on and then i learned that but it was a nighttime thing
and so i don't know how to turn it off but i was able to set it to only last one minute where i'm ideally not awake
from four to four oh one yeah so you never benefit from it i never benefit well is there i don't
think there's a benefit at all for me i don't need it to be orange i'll just dim it and i just
fall asleep well i think it's like the blueness is what is what uh keeps you up oh really yeah so if you're looking at the blue
bluish whites is that real i have no idea yeah because i i feel like there are glasses right
that like block the blue i just assumed all of that is not real depending on who our sponsor
is this week yes it is okay uh yeah you could get actually a pair of glasses that work between 4am
and 401 i will look into those then.
And maybe I will use our promo code depending on
what the sponsor is this week and get a
great discount. Thank you.
Was it annoying, Eric, when I kept ordering
everything that you ordered? No, it was
just something that I noticed.
It just seemed like a thing that you went like
ooh, and me too.
It was very funny.
I respect that you didn't feel pressure in that scenario
era because i would start feeling pressure why i don't give a fuck what gavin gets i don't care
if he likes it i would see that's where we differ i would feel like i gotta bring the bangers out
if i know he's copied everything i do i can't have a weak drink or like food item in the line
none of my no none of my orders are ever weak to begin with, so I never have any, like, worry that they're not all bangers.
I'm ordering stuff that's good as hell.
There are no mid-tier drinks that you sometimes enjoy?
Like what?
I mean, I didn't follow you with the beers.
I went Bloody Mary.
Well, yeah.
There you go.
See, I would have gone the other direction.
I would have ordered the grossest fucking thing possible
to try to trick him into, into like a cement mixer or something.
Whoa, what's in that?
It's like this drink. It's like milk
and something else and you drink it and it like turns
to, it turns solid in your mouth.
It's fucking gross. Somebody gave it to me
on my 21st birthday. It's like
Bailey's and lime juice, isn't it? Cause it like
curdles in your mouth. It's fucking
hideous. Do you know about that, Gavin?
No. Yeah. Do you want to do cement mixers? Yeah, maybe. It's fucking hideous. Do you know about that, Gavin? No.
Yeah.
Do you want to do cement mixers?
Yeah, maybe afterwards I can try and stuff it into a glove.
It's not enough alcohol to get you drunk, but it will taste bad.
Yeah.
I would give it a go.
Yeah.
Bad.
Gross.
Yuck.
Speaking of gross, I had a realization yesterday at the grocery store that I think might lead to, I don't know how,
but I think it might lead to benefits for us.
I realized in the produce section
that there are fruit combinations
that nobody has made yet.
Okay.
Have you ever in your life,
like you're used to it,
you see like strawberry mango, cherry
banana, like whatever.
Kiwi strawberry.
Kiwi strawberry is a great one.
You've never seen, and we could invent the drink, the slushy, the candy, whatever it
is.
You've never seen lemon grape.
No.
No, I haven't.
It doesn't exist.
No.
Nobody's ever thought to combine it that's it's like it's like
how there's never a bluish yellow like it just can't happen yeah yeah like lemon grape we could
if we can figure out the ratio we could revolutionize the fruit industry by unleashing
lemon grape do you think orange banana is something? Orange banana could be something.
That sounds like it'd be in some sort of tropical
juice. Orange banana is kind of like
what an orange Julius is, right?
I feel like orange banana only shows up
for the Avengers of juices.
You know, like where there's like
seven different fruits in a juice when they do
like the full mix. There's an orange
and a banana, I feel like, on the roster there.
But you're never just gonna see
the two of them
by themselves together.
You know what else
you'll never see together?
Grape watermelon.
Grape watermelon.
I think grape is a hard one
to combine with other fruits.
Yeah, I think you might be right.
We gotta write these down.
Lemon is so strong
and grape is so strong,
if you can figure out
how to make them work together,
I bet you could fucking disrupt
the whole fruit industry.
Grape coconut?
It sounds like there's not a lot of...
Oh, wow.
I'm all about grape coconut.
You think grape might be difficult to work with,
it sounds like?
They're not collabing with a lot of the other fruits.
I think that grape is such a...
Oh, see, Gracie just dropped a picture.
Watermelon grape juice?
I've never.
That is crazy.
I bet it's good.
That is crazy. I bet it's so good but i
guess you could probably do i'm trying to think of like what would go with grape in general like
pear would probably do oh would go well with grape um grape pear that's interesting yeah
yeah great mango yeah like like lemon grape is such a you know great you could call grape mango. Yeah, like lemon grape is such a... You could call grape mango, you could call it
grango. You could,
you know what? You could call it grango.
Or mango.
No, grango is... You nailed it the first time.
I need to get the popsicles out again.
Yeah.
I think that there might be some lab work
that could be done in the next couple
weeks amongst all of us, really, if we wanted to. Anybody that was I think that there might be some lab work that could be done in the next couple weeks.
Amongst all of us, really, if we wanted to.
Anybody that was so inspired
to start thinking about combining
non-traditional fruit flavors
into ways that might work with us.
Work for us.
I mean, Gavin has the glove.
I got some spaghetti to work with.
This sounds like a perfect lab task
for you to take on, Jack.
I'll take it on by myself.
That's fine.
I'm saying I won't be offended
if anybody has an idea
and tries it out.
I like that you have
a monthly lab report.
Notes from the lab.
Face sciences.
Yeah.
All right, well, I'll get on that.
Let me write myself a note.
Dragon fruit rarely makes it
into the flavors, does it? It's true. Even though even though it's andrew's pick like dragon fruit and grape you
know i'd never had dragon fruit until recently i had it in a drink delicious in a drink don't
know by itself had a real crunch to it though that i appreciate it did you put the dragon fruit in
no like i ordered a a drink that had it and it was chunks of dragon
fruit in the Jesus and i just got to send myself the best email of my life it just subject line
is just combine fruits in the lab why'd you send us an email that's how i send myself notes
yeah you could use notes uh i do notes for like show notes and stuff,
but I want to like give myself a to-do thing.
I email it to myself and then I keep it bold
and I'm going to look at my email
and I see like my to-do list essentially.
Anything that's bold that I need to do.
You don't email yourself, Gavin?
I email myself documents sometimes
if Google Drive's been a piece of shit
and Discord doesn't work.
That's fair.
But I don't talk to myself on email.
I can't believe you can't make Discord work. You yeah i'm posting dongs left and right why don't you
know what bobas are different oh um gavin do you have any notes for this uh for our episode
recordings what do you mean like do i have anything i thought i thought that you had notes that you
wanted to get to for our show. For this show?
You said that like two episodes ago, right? Yeah, yes.
But that was the lab stuff.
I think it was the lab.
I thought it was lab stuff,
but I thought he had Vegas stuff.
I thought he had more notes.
That's why I asked.
I was trying to tee him up.
Hey, that's my mistake.
I'm sorry.
Won't happen again.
Is there any Vegas stuff that you didn't cover, Gav?
Jeff's farts.
I've got, no, I think I've got everything on there.
Oh, I don't like, um, I don't like the new thing on planes where you can put your phone in the seat in front of you.
That's like the standard now instead of having screens
because the freaking idiot behind me leaves it on vibrate
and he's getting so many messages.
It's vibrating my freaking head
and it's not a problem
i ever saw coming we need like a dampened seat because my freaking head's rattling no i'm with
you now i didn't understand that that dude so instead of having pre-built screens they expect
you to clip your phone into well i think that's fine i mean that cuts down on weight i guess
nobody's watching those screens anymore anyway everyone's watching shit on their ipad i'm a big
screen guy no No, I
need the screens. No, they're gone, dude. They're out
of place. You just connect to the Wi-Fi and it's on your device.
No! You don't miss them. You won't miss it.
I promise you. No, I will. I will miss them.
No, it's better on your phone because that way
if it's on your little table
when you eat, crumbs go all over your phone while you're trying to watch
Ozark.
Wait, that's
supposed to make me feel better about this?
I don't understand.
I just had a built-in screen taken away from me.
You said, don't worry, crumbs will fall on your new one.
Are you saying because I'm clipping it?
Yeah, but I wasn't doing that.
No, but I didn't do that to begin with.
I would just not.
I'd just look out the window.
I'm going to be a window guy, I guess.
Yeah, watch out for turkey sandwiches. That's all I'm saying. I will. You're going to just look out the window. I'm going to be a window guy, I guess. Yeah, watch out for turkey sandwiches.
That's all I'm saying.
You're going to just look out the window?
Yeah.
As I said, you've got to fucking vote.
Some people just stare at the freaking flight map
for the whole flight.
There's so many people who do that.
Have you noticed that?
They literally just stare and watch the plane fly over the land.
Yeah, by the way, that's a level of boring that we're not gonna get to oh no i'm already there andrew you're
not there i dabble in the plane map i don't mind the plane map you check in with the plane map but
you're not gonna sit there and watch it for the entire film well you're not gonna watch it at all
because you'd have to navigate to it on your phone and you won't do that well no yeah now now it's
gone the plane map might as well have never existed in my life if i have to pull it up on a phone to be able to see it i'm really good
at just sitting somewhere and turning my brain off and just just imagining rain yeah thinking
about the rain thinking about uh all sorts of things it's not too silent for you you don't
have to like fill the air no i i don't i i live in that. So you and I would be great in an Uber ride.
This complete silence.
Well, it sounded like we were once you got pissed off.
No, we've never been in an Uber ride.
That's a lie.
Dude, watching how hard it was.
Caleb drove us.
What are you talking about?
You don't even remember it.
Watching how hard it was for you to sit with the silence earlier when Gavin was testing it,
I think you're the Uber driver that doesn't stop talking.
No.
No, I would be the Uber driver that never talked.
This is different.
There's different contexts, okay?
If we're doing a podcast, then yeah, I feel like I need to fill.
I think you'd be like, oh, they're in my car.
I want them to have a good time.
I want them to know that I'm a friendly Uber driver.
I want them to enjoy.
I know a lot about the area that we're in so we're going from point
a to b i'll tell them some of the highlights on the on the route and then before you know it you
talk the whole time and they probably had a lovely time i yeah no no i wouldn't i'd be very quiet
i'd be terrified if they initiated one of my uh non-vegas notes was um something i think we should
get into you know how like software is like on the computers
and the computer is the hardware
and if you have like a device
you update the firmware
I watched a video and I learned about
that they were like using
I don't know what they were doing. They had like
neurons. They were using like rat meat
to try
to try and like play Doom
or something. They were like a bunch of like rat brain matter or
something i don't know what it was but they were calling it wet wear and i was like oh we face
needs to get into wet wear somehow because i just love that that's so gross dude okay so well i i
like the idea of what where but you don't know what it is is the problem it's like to be a bunch of
like goo like cells that they had to feed that would sit on top of like a little circuit board
and it would like stimulate different neurons but it was like it was like like an interface that
they had to put food on oh because i think it was like rat goo or something well what i can't say definitively
is shocks will not be wet wear because okay wet i'll keep them warm dry uh we can do wet wear
yeah i think i think it's worth it's not what you're describing but like we could do a thing
called wet wear i don't want anything to do with rat goo or rat brains.
Andrew, you don't think you can play Doom with rat flesh?
Kind of like you did with grapes?
Do I have to show my hands while doing it?
You have to use long sticks.
You have to show your hands wet wear style.
Or is that you?
I was thinking about that later, Jeff.
You once told me that Gavin is always adding one more thing.
He's a great one more, like a one addition thing.
And that was a classic one more thing.
Absolutely.
You didn't see that coming?
I didn't see you doing a one more thing.
No, I feel like ideas are open to brainstorm
it up until we're doing them you can always add shit you can always adapt you can it's just it
feels the way you do it feels like that's been in the chamber the whole time i'll be honest
sometimes it was an assumption from the beginning like of course you would film your head it's a funny stick well it's it's not but it's not a
funny stick now it's just a little stick it's funny it's a slightly larger funny it'll get
funny okay it's gonna get funny fast it well we'll see see how good i am how many that's another
how many different sticks nine nine? Nine, I believe.
Okay, so like nine inches.
Each one's an inch.
When does it get funny to you?
When might the camera come on?
I think...
Well, I'm not...
Because it sounds like
there's a funny window
where it's big enough
to be funny,
but it's not big enough
that you have to use your chin
and can't film it.
One sec.
Let me grab him.
Let me find him them i'll be honest
i think it's funny right now just trying to figure out when it's funny but whatever let me pull this
because you're asking the dinkledges guy i don't know measurements very well saying them so i'm
pulling out the sticks i'd say um i'd say this one is when it gets funny i can't see it. I mean, it would be really cool if you were filming your hands
while you did this. That's all I'm saying.
Fuck, I'd grab the smallest ones
that are in it. What's the second?
So the smallest ones is when it's funny?
No, they're just on a controller
on the other side of my desk, and I'd
use them to measure how
when it got funny, so I could say the inch.
Let me reach
for the... Okay. So they're not funny, how when it got funny so I could say the inch. Let me reach.
Okay.
They're not funny.
They're just a tool of measurement to find.
Yes.
No, they're one inch ones
are not funny.
I just I just want to point out
if you're at home
listening to this
and you're going,
fuck, I really want to see this.
So do we.
Two.
Yeah.
Welcome to Arnold.
Yeah, I didn't realize
when I stuffed them
into an envelope,
it'd be the last time I'd ever see them.
Six inches.
Gets funny at six inches.
Six inches.
Are you serious? It's funny at least
at two. Yeah.
Okay, you can maybe sell me
at three. Alright, I'll take three.
I'll take between three and
eight inches.
Yeah. Well, you know what? It does get funny. I will admit that. I'll take between three and eight inches.
Yeah.
Well, you know what? It does.
It does get funny.
I will admit that.
Thanks.
Benevolent of you.
Yeah.
So what works?
What's that?
Oh, man.
I will say we had a conversation at breakfast that I kind of wanted to get your take on,
Andrew.
Okay.
When we were in Vegas.
I think maybe Kent, my soon-to-be brother-in-law, brought this up.
But do you think you've ever been somebody's last straw?
I asked Eric about whether he'd been anyone's last straw.
Yeah, that was where it came from.
Oh, man.
Have I ever been?
Have I directly been?
Does it count if I'm in the group of people that was someone's last?
OK, but I didn't do it right.
Like, am I does this qualify?
I was in a bunch of me in the neighborhood.
Kids were riding our bikes and there was a guy that was like graveling his house, like
his front yard.
And one of the kids decided to use his pile of gravel as a ramp.
And so they drove up it and then like wrote it back down.
And then we rode down the street a little bit.
And that was definitely that man's last straw.
He did not enjoy it.
He had enough.
He grouped us all up and he screamed at us from the top of his lungs.
And I just remember him yelling that he was gonna blast our ass with
a hose so hard it would shave it and i was just crying because i was like four and i didn't like
loud noises and this guy is screaming i just want to go home because i didn't i would never drive
in the guy's gravel pile but i was part of the group i was in the bike ride and you get your ass blasted yeah that was definitely that last draw my cousin uh once chased me around and i
stood in front of my grandparents back door because it was all windows and i'm like he's
not gonna shoot me if i stand in front of all the windows and then like the window went it was a
he shot a rock at me even though i was in front of
the windows and i heard my grandpa go like and i so i panicked i ran i just ran as far away from
the door as i could he yelled at my cousin and then he looked at me and it's the maddest i'd
ever seen him and i just said and i didn't do anything. And he yelled back, I know. But he was still just as that was his last straw.
So I don't know if I've ever been anyone's last straw, but I've certainly witnessed people on their last straw.
I'll have to think about that.
I'm sorry.
I don't have a better.
No, it's OK.
It's a it was a it was a just thrown at you, you know?
Yeah.
No, I don't. I don't think i have been anyone's last straw but gavin or eric do you guys do you guys think you've
ever been someone's last straw um i would think probably i just don't know the situation where
but but i would assume just through me being myself, yeah, probably.
Yeah.
Thanks.
No, I agree.
Dude, listen, I can't, I'm reasonably certain that there could be a Facebook group of people
that I have been their last straw.
Like, just in the army alone.
Like, the five years that I was in the army,
there's probably a dozen people I was their last straw.
I was, yeah. I would probably a dozen people I was their last straw I was yeah
I I would guess that Eric caused me to walk away from the booth a couple of times at conventions
oh probably but then it wasn't the fight it was a you know it was one of the straws but it wasn't
the last one it was just like the final straw of that day and then I loaded up with new straws for
the next one loaded up new straws I remember the next one. Loaded up new straws.
I remember the time when I was in high school and my friend Shane and I would sit on his roof
and wait till the end of the day
when the construction crews would leave.
I think I've told this story before.
They were building a neighborhood right behind his house
and we would run out there at night
and take all the cinder blocks
and build a wall leading in,
like at the road going into the neighborhood.
So then the night security guard would have to drive in
and then take the blocks down
and then throw them off on the side of the road so that he could do his
uh like do a security patrol and then after he would leave we would put him back up and then he
would have to come and tear him down and eventually he just stopped doing the security patrol we did
it to him for like two weeks and then that was he just gave up i i remember deciding that a
friendship was over because someone else was the last...
He did like someone that was the last straw.
He was like a...
My neighbor when I was growing up and he was really disgusting.
He just used to do really gross stuff.
And at one point he was eating a load of bourbon biscuits and he just put like two of them
in his mouth and he just kept chewing them and he wouldn't swallow it until it was just a brown liquid and he started gargling with it and i just immediately thought i just
don't want to be friends with you anymore and yet here we are he also had there was a there was a
type of crisp called uh it's called skips which is like a prawn flavored crisp and he used to pour
milk in the bag and
eat them with a spoon and it would slop i think i think this guy's the reason why i hate soggy stuff
because i've watched like wet skips flop off his spoon back into the bag while he had a mouthful
of gargled bourbons horrible nick's right that's the origin of your issue i think it is you've
gotten to the bottom of it.
Do you think if you could go find that guy and let him know how much that affected you,
you could reclaim wet bread?
I'm friends with him on Facebook.
You gotta tell him.
It's the only way you can ever eat French dip soup.
Or what is it called?
French onion soup.
That's it.
French onion.
Well, a French dip is a thing that's true i just remembered that i was my grandma's last straw twice and it was both
both fair related occurrences one one was uh she took my cousins and i and my cousins were more
aligned with jeff i would say, and causing mischief.
And I was just trying to be good.
But they were just monsters the entire trip.
And we had to go to Vancouver.
So, like, get on a boat and then go across.
And they were just fucking up everything the entire trip.
And it was burning her out.
And then on the way on the way back on the ferry ride, there was a gift shop and I had money over i didn't spend all my money when i was at the fair i'm like maybe i don't know seven um
and i was looking around the gift shop and they had a pocket knife they had a little pocket knife
and i bought it um and she viewed that as me buying a blade much like our pizza slicer and
she was so mad at me that i bought a knife on the boat and she just yelled
at all three of us nobody move and we weren't allowed to move or talk the rest of the trip
on the way back that was that that was definitely her last straw real life on pause she did yeah
she put real life apart and it was like a thing of like do i give back the pocket knife like it was it was a whole thing um and
then another time after that she didn't bring them back it was my different cousin and i they were
they were banned she was never gonna go on a trip with them again so my other cousin who was who was
not as rambunctious and you know that ride that's like a ufo and it spins you and like you go up the
wall you're like the gravity or whatever yeah the gravitron i did that like four's like a ufo and it spins you and like you go up the wall you're like the gravity
whatever yeah the gravitron i did that like four times in a row and then i realized that the stamp
that was on my hand like it got removed in that process and that's how like you'd go on rides
but i was kind of done with the day and i pointed out like oh my stamp is gone and my grandma
interpreted that as like me wanting another stamp
so i could go on rides and it's the middle of summer so it's super hot and we're walking around
and we go to the first place to get a stamp and they didn't have any and then we went to a second
booth across the park and their ink was out so then we had to go to a third booth across the park
and i finally got my hand restamped and she's like well what ride you want
to go on now and i said i don't want i'm good like i'm ready to go i don't want to go on anymore
and she just yelled like why did we do all that what was the point of any of that and i never
i was like i never said i wanted to i thought like i was doing this because i thought you wanted to
and that was that was that she was done.
She was fed up.
That was the last time we went to the fair.
I went two years in a row.
Never again.
Speaking of what was the point of any of that and being done?
This seems like a great place to end episode 166.
And like Andrew's grandma, I'm sure you yourself are wondering what was the point of the last hour or so
of my life. I don't
know. I don't know. Maybe you'll come
and you'll tune in next week to find out.
We'll see. Can I ask one question
before we go? Please do. What?
Did y'all know that Oppenheimer made the Atomic
Bomb? Yeah. Before
the movie came out? How can I save my
little boy from Oppenheimer's deadly toy?
I don't even know
what that is. I'm sorry for asking
that question. End the episode. We should have ended
30 seconds. Did you not? I agree.
100%.
Bye.
I didn't know.
Hey guys, Major League Fan Jack
here with a look at next week's episode of
F*** Face. The gang invents a new
game.
Penn is in the food lab.
Sleep spaghetti version 2.
The most horrible merch is on the way.
Brady Dick is looking good.
And once again, Andrew does not eat the pencil.
All that and more on next week's episode of F*** Face. We'll see you next time.