Regulation Podcast - In the Anal Trenches // A Tub as Narrow as Geoff's foot [48]

Episode Date: April 28, 2021

Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about Gavin's ADR Nick theory confirmed, an official F**kface retraction, getting in a dry tub, and missed mechanics. Want to contribute to bits? Email what you can do to [e-mail] Sponsored by: Hello Tushy (http://hellotushy.com/face), The Jordan Harbinger Show (http://jordanharbinger.com/start), & HelloFresh (http://hellofresh.com/12face + code 12face). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right go for the intro welcome to face not a question all right that was it that was the intro and that was andrew's intro anyway you were saying something about uh nick so i have a theory about nick and i feel like because this has lasted across multiple weeks, it's gonna be a huge letdown, because it's a very tiny not an important theory I've had about Nick. Here's the thing about Nick. Nick is probably our best

editor, right? I don't like the episodes that he doesn't edit. We've had editors who, well, we've had editors who just gave up they're just like i'm not doing that no uh bye shots fucking fired uh we've had some other good ones but i feel like nick it needs the fewest notes he's always like cutting out stuff that we clearly don't want and even if we don't mention it he's probably cutting out us eating and breathing down

the mic hole very good and and the best part about it, almost no feedback every week. Well, I think it's because Nick has been around since, he understands what F*** Face is because he's helped build it, right? Yeah. Yeah. However. But I feel like whenever we talk to Nick on the podcast,

he comes in and he's like, and he's sort of flubbing all over his words. He's not making much sense. But when the episode comes out, he speaks with perfect articulation. He is very well spoken and my theory is this. He is re-recording

his input to these episodes. I think he's doing ADR. I think he's doing ADR. I think he's doing replacement takes. I 100%, 100% agree with that and believe that that's happening. Thoughts, Nick? Yeah, that's happened twice.

Absolutely, 100%. Yeah. Part of the reason I do it, though, part of the reason I do it, though, is because Gavin will turn to me, or I assume he's turning to me in these moments and like Nick what do you have to say and I'm like uh

I better open a recording program and I have no way to match up my audio so later on I just am like oh this is this is shit I'm just gonna rerecord my audio first off Gavin excellent great job and secondly I think that is the right of the editor, right?

Oh, absolutely. Back in the old days before face and all this stuff, you know, we used to, at the day job, Bruce Teeth, I used to make a cartoon called Red vs. Blue, and I did most of the audio recording and editing for most of the seasons, and I would wait, and I was also a character, right? So I would do my lines like everybody else

and I'd cut them in. And then after everybody would go home for the day, I would rerecord everything I did like three or four or sometimes 60 or 70 times until it sounded decent. And nobody ever had to know. And I didn't talk about it. But I guarantee you that character Griff had more lines rerecorded than the rest of the characters

put together. I'm kind of bummed, though. It's like, let's fucking maybe take 300 will be better. I don't care. It's, you know, it doesn't matter. When I'm sort of bumbling my way through these points, sometimes I wish I could do a redo. But maybe I'll start submitting separate takes of stuff after the episode. That won't complicate things.

Would you say, here you are talking about how Nick has gone back and edited a more cogent response in, how do you feel about editing stuff out of the episode, Gavin? What do you mean? Well, like having stuff removed. What's your point? What's your point? Just curious. I've done it. Yeah.

That is. We've all done it. That is a set. Here's the, yeah, we have all done it. If a conversation sort of trails off into nothing, and it's like, what was the point of even, nah, just lop it off? Or if it's just too gross, we've done that before?

Here's the... Jeff is teeing me up, is what he's doing. I was... Jeff, this is like... One of these episodes. It's one of these behind-the-scenes arguing episodes. Gavin, I want you to know that I decided I was not gonna bring this up

I had mentioned it to Jeff well you didn't tell me you weren't gonna bring it up no I didn't but I didn't think you'd fucking team me up for it either oh come on I'm a professional this is my day job what else am I gonna do fair enough but I was you

got and I don't know to what extent gap but we we talked about we talked about a butt blood incident and i didn't plan on bringing that up on the show that was the thing that was brought up because you brought it up and i was like i don't think i really want to talk about this but i was worried about this I was just making it clear that we need to know when you're bleeding from the anus so we yeah I don't know I don't that's not necessarily a podcast talk Entertainment it's called fucking face. It's a comedy show And this is so I was like I'm not gonna bring this up at all you brought it up And then Jeff thought my fucking John Voight joke was the funniest thing ever so it's like fuck then I can't remove this it was really good

really funny joke but then I learned because you mentioned this on the RT podcast which is why I even feel comfortable bringing it up at all yeah you had a story yourself that you had edited from the show and I was deep I was like I didn't want to talk about this, but I know Gavin has a story too. We're in the anal trenches together. I'm willing to ride this out. And I feel like you kind of just left me. That's how it felt.

I don't know to what extent what was edited. I just know that you requested, because it was gross. It's a super fucking gross episode. Without a doubt. The episode overall, I just thought was you requested because it was gross. It's a super fucking gross episode without a doubt. The episode overall I just thought was so disgusting. Yeah. Nick's saying that it was like 20 minutes of the episode. I had about 50 seconds cut just because I was telling...

I was just going back. I was trying to make you feel comfortable Andrew. I was telling my butt story. Yeah, no I get it. When I listened to it back I was like this provides nothing and it's very disgusting. No, no, yeah, no, I get it. When I listened to it back, I was like, this provides nothing, and it's very disgusting. No, no, no, no, no, no. It's way more disgusting than Andrew's butt story. But then, you go on to do the disgusting cupcake story, and it didn't feel as bad, to be honest. But I felt like it added nothing, and I was happy to lose it. But here's the thing, Gavin.

I felt okay going forward. I'm like, because we're in this together and you just left. So now I'm just stuck. I'm stuck. This is like, I didn't factor in the ability of you retreating. You know when they build like an arched bridge over like a river or something

and they build support beams while they're building a bridge and then at the end, once the bridge is built, they demolish the beams and they just crumble away. Yeah, that's exactly what happened. i was just your anal beams andrew look i i didn't think right my story i i didn't i didn't mind it being told because i told it i was happy for that to be in i just felt like listening back to it

it's just one disgusting thing after another and mine wasn't even very funny mine was just like i'm happy i'm happy to tell it again leave it in i just felt like it was detrimental to the comedy oh god i don't think we need to double back it was just very much like i felt like we were in we were in it together i that was sort of my comfortability of it of like i don't want to talk about this but gavin brought it up and you know what gavin lack of a better word also has blood on his hands for this will equally be blood in his shorts just well i mean to be fair i described what i cut when i was talking about the roosty podcast so there's no you did you mentioned in passing but you also that whole i i didn't realize that you did it in a reply in her

slack you did it in a reply thread which is why I didn't see it so it's like when I heard I heard about someone told me that you're gonna edit that out and I was like that motherfucker he did it under the radar even and then I noticed the reply thread. Well it's just cause it's I assume easier for Nick if all the notes are below the episode and not on top of us chatting about bat knobs and shite. Yeah

totally fair. Anyway in future I'll consult you when I tee you up for a nice bloody future, I'll consult you when I tee you up for a nice bloody Ada story. I'll let you know if I'm thinking about cutting it. I'm all good. I got checked out. I'm good. There are no issues.

That was so fucking entertaining for me. I admit, looking back on it, I should have told you, and I apologize. I left you up there in the anal trenches alone. You just left. Yeah. All right.

While we're apologizing, Gavin, that is a great natural segue for something that I'm going to have to do that I'm not too fucking excited about. I do like, though, by the way, that Andrew didn't bring that up with me. He just pitched to you about it. No, no, no. This is why I did it. Because you requested something to be edited out. And I would never bring it up on the show if you wanted it to be removed.

So I was asking Jeff, like, are the ethics of this okay? Because you mentioned it on the podcast. And I didn't know what your reasons necessarily were for wanting it to remove. So it was more of a question to Jeff of, is this appropriate for me to even discuss on the show? Oh, absolutely. He threw you under the anal blood bus dude you have every right to talk about it every

right to talk about it I love some of the sentences coming out of this podcast it is your god given podcast right as a professional podcaster to address that Gavin f*** faced you hard speaking and speaking of f*** faced you hard.

Speaking of f*** facing, I don't like to do this, but I need to issue an official f*** face retraction. Holy crap. Have we ever had one of those? I don't know. I don't know that we have. But if we haven't, this will be the first. Hopefully the last. Shit. I'm not proud of it. I'm not excited about it.

I've been living with the guilt of something for about, I guess, two or three weeks now. And I'd be lying if I said it hasn't been kind of eaten away at me. And so I wanted to say this to Andrew a lot earlier, but I realized that everything that we do has to be filtered through the lens of this podcast.

So I've been waiting. Andrew, I need to apologize to you and to the audience for something. And I feel really shitty about it yeah I eviscerated you over sockless shoe wearing and I even thought in the moment am I being a little

too critical and then I thought who cares did you switch teams however I got on my bike about a week ago not too long after you and I went for our bike ride actually Gavin and I too long after you and I went for our bike ride, actually, Gavin. And I realized, I looked down and I realized I was wearing shoes without socks. And then I realized that I had somehow in that rant against Andrew, I had forgotten that I had a major life change about a year ago around the time COVID started.

a year ago around the time COVID started. And that was when I switched to an all bathing suit, bathing suit only wardrobe, right? Yeah. And as a part of that, I started taking my oldest shoes, my oldest vans, the ones that I use to cut the grass in. And I started wearing them without socks while I rode my bike. So I didn't have, you know, like fucking like unburned sock legs, you know, so I don't walk around looking like I'm wearing socks when I'm not wearing socks. So it didn't look weird

having having socks on. And I do that almost every day. I wear shoes without socks almost every day when I ride a bicycle. And I fucking I just I just attacked you. But meanwhile, I'm doing the exact same thing. And I just I'm sorry. I i really am i will say i still think it's gross and i do i realize i do wash those shoes uh once a week how how could you but i just like i just blanked like i'm 45 right i was going off of 44 years of information and i just forgot about 11 months of it like the most recent 11 months you also had a giant bit about putting on the wrong sock every day and sometimes you don't even wear them. I still, I wear socks every day.

At some point. At some point, yeah. Wait, you've said you ride your bike every day. Yeah, I do now, just about. But it was also like, it was also, I think, coming out of winter and the snow stuff. And I hadn't been on the bike a lot. So it wasn't top of mind, you know? Like, I hadn't been able to ride my bike a lot lately.

So now I've been, you know, I've rid ridden it every day except for today because it's been rainy but uh so anyway andrew i'm sorry i'm a dirty no sock shoe wearing scumbag who wears sockless shoes when he rides his bicycle and he does it a couple hours a day six days a week i and so i'm sorry no i guess i accept your apology but it's also like you called me a dirty sockless scumbag in your apology i don't know how to feel about this yeah i don't know how effective of life i still think it's disgusting i just am a part of i'm just also disgusting so wait you whenever you ride your bike you don't wear socks uh well if i wear shorts i don't wear socks and so i had I wear shorts, I don't wear socks.

And so I had been wearing pants. This seems so complicated. It's not. It's not. If you wear pants, you wear socks. That just makes sense. Okay. Right? Mostly you wear socks. But if it's 100 degrees outside in Texas and you're riding a bicycle and you wear swim trunks, it looks dumb to wear swim trunks with socks.

Sure. You know? And shoes. Makes sense. So you take the socks off and you just wear like, you know, gardening shoes essentially. Why don't you just wear some low ankle socks? I can't wear those socks and I'll tell you why. Goddamn, dude. If I could. Believe me, I wish that I could. However,

I have very thin feet. That's not a brag. It's just that my very thin, very long, thin feet. That's not a brag. It's just that my very thin, very long, thin feet and so shoes are always a little too wide for me. Okay, so narrow, not like

way for thin underneath. They're not way for thin. They're narrow. I have narrow feet. I have svelte, narrow, very thin ankles, very narrow feet. And so socks won't stay. The only socks that'll stay up are socks that are like long socks. So I can't wear those little short socks. I've had like runner's versions.

I've bought Vans. I've bought like a million different kinds of those little short socks. And what happens is when I put them on, even the ones that have the rubber stopper that are supposed to grab the back of your ankle or whatever, within five minutes,

they're all bunched up in the front of the shoe. That surely is nothing to do with the width of your foot. Like that's all ankle and heel that holds on a sock no it's it's the whole package dude i don't fill out a sock and then i and then you walk around and then within 10 minutes the socks are off and at the front of my shoes squish my feet they go right off dude I can't be the only person that has that problem I mean I don't I feel like I don't have a wide foot either but I don't I'm not like that kicking my socks off when I run dude I wish I wasn't

maybe we should maybe here's what we do the worst Forrest Gump his socks just falling as he's running next time we see each other which hopefully won't be too long hopefully you'll be a big boy and buy a bicycle so we can go be friends again yeah and uh I sent you two different three

different options all perfectly lovely next time I see you let's measure our feet and let's see if whose feet are more narrow yeah I mean you can't it's just a weird request I'm convinced like you know you have those In like a fancy shoe You'll have like a wooden foot bit

That goes inside keeps the shoe good You know what I'm talking about A shoe horn A shoe horn is like Is how you get in and out of a shoe It's like the toe I don't know what it does but yeah I've seen them as like a wooden toe section with like a metal bar leading to like a wooden heel section.

Oh, to maintain the shape of the shoe. Yeah. Yeah. I'm convinced if you put a sock on that, which is pretty much the narrowest foot of all time, I bet a sock would stay on that. I bet it wouldn't. I'm pretty sure the heel would keep it on. Not if it walked and rode a bicycle, it wouldn't. I promise. There's nothing wrong with my heels, buddy. I got normal ass heels. I'm just telling you, socks don't stay up on these feet. Maybe your foot doesn't go back

beyond your heel. I also have to, every pair of shoes I own, and part of why I own vans is because they fit me a little bit better, but I have to cinch like shoelaces as tight as they'll possibly go. And I still my feet still slide around inside the shoe left. I think you're doing something wrong. Yeah, I have narrow feet. I always have. Should we put paint on our feet and stand on paper? Yes.

Let's measure our feet. Let's get paper? Yes! Let's measure our feet. Let's get a tape measure. Let's measure our feet. Let's do sock studies if you want. We'll both get the same socks. We can run around and do calisthenics, do physical activity, see whose socks stay on better. I guarantee you you'll find my socks bunched up at the front of my fucking shoes for no reason, and it doesn't matter

if it's Vans or Nikes or Adidas or whatever or fucking dress shoes. It's all the same. Andrew, I feel like you're not a normal foot guy. I don't know what that means. What does that mean? You're just not like a blank guy, so I feel like there's something with your feet that you have an issue with. I mean, you've got the bad ankles, obviously.

How is the rest of your foot looking? I don't feel like, yeah, I don't think I have any weird, but then there's things where you don't know that are weird or not. I don't want to completely pivot away, but when you guys have a bath, somebody yelled at me about this, and I had never put any thought into this. There's zero consideration.

When you have a bath, do you fill the tub with any amount of water first and then hop in, or do you just hop fill the tub with any amount of water first and then hop in? Or do you just hop into the tub and then turn the water on and let it fill? I fill the bath and then I get in it once it's full. I do the same, but I do feel like you're being unfairly maligned here. I don't think it's that weird to get into an empty tub and fill it up. It feels like something you do when

you're a kid more than an adult well but then you get all that weird like sticky like your skin will get all stuck to the side of the bath if there's no water in it it's like not a great material to be naked against um no well no i don't it's just i never thought i never even considered there was any other option i climb into the tub while it's completely empty this is apparently a weird thing i did not know this it's just a weird it's just a weird way to spend your time man like well that bath is running you could be doing you could be brushing your teeth or doing any, eating a cupcake. You could be doing anything else. You could be mashing up your cupcakes. You could be collecting the headset. No. This is just like, for me, this is my logic.

One, I get complete temperature control the entire way. That's totally true. I like a hot bath. Totally true. So I'm gauging it the entire process. And then two, I don't trust that like the water, it's just going to overflow when I get in. I don't know what the cap is. I guess I'd learn that over time. I'm sure you just eventually figure that out. But when you get in, the water it's just gonna overflow when i get in i don't know what the cap is i guess i'd learn that over time i'm sure you just eventually figure that out but when you get in

the water rises yeah well here's what you could do next time you have a bath fill it up when you're in it then get out that's the amount of water you could put in before you get in or i could just hop in and then turn the water on and not think about it at all. I mean, you can. You could. It's just, A, it's boring to wait for a bath to fill. And if you're trying to watch something or listen to something, you've got the loud noise of all the water. You forgot, Gavin, I'm bringing in 50 devices with me. I'm not bored. I got a whole...

Yeah, you're playing toilet Jenga. I just, I never considered that as being a strange thing. I did a Twitter poll, and's like 2000 votes right now. 88% are filled before entering. And I feel like 90% of the 12% are people that click the wrong one by mistake. It feels like it's a very small minority. I'm open to it. Like, I'll try it for sure.

I just never considered it. I want to I want to enjoy the bath. I don't want to be doing all the fill work. But I would argue I'm enjoying more of the bath than you. I'm getting the full bath process. There's no way. He's not wrong. Once you're done doing the ratios and you're like, oh, this is a good temperature and it's full, you've been in the bath

for probably like five or ten minutes to that point and you probably want to get out soon. Well, he's like pre-gaming though. That's like, yeah. That's tailgating. The bath hasn't started until the water turns off, right? It's pre-tubbing. Nick's got it right he's like pre-gaming, though. That's like, that's like, yeah, that's tailgating. The bath hasn't started until the water turns off, right? It's pre-tubbing. It's exactly, Nick's got it right.

It's pre-tubbing. Pre-tubbing. That doesn't, pre-tubbing doesn't count against the bath. Yeah, but you don't want to get all wrinkled. How long are you staying in the bath, Andrew?

For like the entirety of my bath on average, probably like an hour, hour and a half, maybe. Hour and a half? What are you watching a full fucking movie in there yeah i might be yeah hour and a half if you're an hour and a half in a bathtub you're having to empty out water and then refill it to stay to keep a constant temperature well that's the problem if i could have like a random ability

it would be like water hot like as a command i'm really bad at even though i'm in the tub before the water gets in there i am the absolute worst at gauging what temperature i want i want it to be super hot and then i get too hot so i put cold in and it gets too cold and i can never get back to the hotness i want it's a struggle i'm really bad at maintaining you have like rationed hot water uh what do you mean what do you mean by like rationed hot water like i have a limited tank that's what you yeah like in england i the the heater came on like twice a day and if you used up all the hot water in the morning that was it until it came on at night yeah i don't know exactly what the recharge is but yeah you you run out of hot water and is that why you can't get it hot again or you just yeah that is the problem of like yeah like i get it super hot i kind of want

it to be soup like but then it gets a little too hot. So I put cold in and then like, I've already used too much of my cap. So I can't get it back. It's a problem. Here's what I did. I feel like this is much easier. I'll run a bath, right?

All the way to the top, maybe a couple of inches lower than the drain thing at the top. Cause I'll displace a few. If it's too hot, dip a little foot in. If it's too hot, just wait a bit. I don't,

I'm not adding cold to it. Cause that, cause that will really throw it cold too quickly. yeah this is good advice i was just that's curious because it never it was a thing i never considered and when i told the cupcake thing i mentioned it and someone yelled at me about it i don't think it's as weird as the audience has latched on to i gotta be honest with you and i did i do think i've done it that way i do think the way gavin is describing it is the is the way not most the vast majority of people take baths although i gavin's uh fear of adding cold water in for fucking up the ratio is weird i don't know why you wouldn't do that it's not it's not hard i just

i don't want the back and forth let me ask you a question andrew how many how many baths on average how many baths a week do you take uh i don't know, maybe two, two or three. Is a bath your, like, are you more of a shower guy? No, I'm more of a shower. Yeah, a bath is purely a relaxation type thing. Yeah, I only take baths when my girlfriend makes me because I'm whining about how sore my shoulder is or whatever, and she's like, take a bath without some salt. So I don't ever think to take a bath.

Really? It's something that's thrust upon me that I then have to acquiesce to. How often do you take baths, Gavin? I'm a pretty frequent bath-er, bather these days, because when I lived with you in my little studio, I didn't have one. And then when we lived in that rental house, did that house have one? I don't think. No.

I think you had one, but I didn't. Yeah, you've been shower-centric. Yeah, so I was just a shower dude for years. And then when finally got my own house I was all about a bath I love them good relaxing time good time to uh do emails and that watch something you've been putting off I love it yeah it's a great here's the other thing with my bath why I don't think I can even even let's say I agree the better method is to fill it to an extent or whatever and check it my bathtub really fucking sucks where i live it's super it's like it's it's it's very narrow it's like surprisingly narrow it's like if jeff's foot was about yeah i bet i bet it couldn't hold up a sock yeah it definitely couldn't hold up a sock audience is gonna back me up on this there's a lot of people out there

that have sock issues like me i promise you so i need to for how this tub is shaped i need to hold my back to the wall the entire time of it it's a tub shower because if i don't what did you what do you mean go ahead what did you just say do that bit again yeah what i don't understand uh i just i can't i was trying to picture it i don't know what you said okay it's a tub shower it's weirdly shaped it's very narrow but it is a bath yeah it's a tub shower. It's weirdly shaped. It's very narrow. But it is a bath. Yeah, it's a bath. Like, there's a bath and there's a shower part to it.

Yeah. But it's like, it's just like you have a curtain instead of a door. Whatever. It's both. You're describing, like, every shower. You're describing a bath. Yeah. Well, there are bathtubs that don't have shower attachments. But yeah, I guess you're right.

It's a little redundant to get into the specifics of it. But the point is mainly the shape issue if i if i slide off that back wall water gets behind me and then i can't go backwards or else it fires out the back of the tub and gets all over the floor so you're you're acting as a dam for your own bathtub yeah like i need to i need to hold the wall the back wall of the tub or or it will get behind me. And if it's like a fucking, it's like in a movie where they step on the trip mine or whatever. Like I need to, I can't move a certain extent

or else it will fire out the tub. Is there a perfect seal? Andrew's fucking holding or fighting off the water walkers. I am, I am, yeah. I just, I cannot allow water he's hopa it's i am the fucking gandalf of water of like it cannot pass me because if it does it's gonna get all over the floor if your back is against okay i'm imagining it all wrong i'm imagining that you just sat in the middle of the path

and there's only no no no no no no no, no, no, no, no, no. You say your back is at the wall. My back is at the wall of the tub, at the very, like, as far back as it can get. You're creating a skin seal. Yeah, I'm blocking it off so all the water goes in front of me. Right, but if the water gets behind you, you can't just slowly sit back against the wall. If I slowly go back against the wall, the water shoots i slowly go back against the wall the water shoots out of the back it's like a cork in a bottle

that's a great descriptor the first i didn't i didn't realize this i didn't realize this the first time i was here and i got out of the tub and my floor was drenched just water all over someone coming to be like andrew why is there water on the ceiling? You're like, oh, I just learned that. It doesn't fire at that rate. It just slightly goes over. It's not like launching water. So when you say wall,

are you just saying the back of the tub or is there a wall at the back of the tub also? I don't, maybe I'll just take a photo of it. Like it's just, it's all one piece. Like the shower plastic to the tub also um i don't maybe i'll just take a photo of it like it's just it's all one piece like the shower plastic to the tub is all one piece could you take a photo now uh sure while he's taking a photo uh well he's off do you remember the the fucking don zimmer pedro martinez fight gavin yeah did we look at the did we do the action images of that or just the Well, he's off. Do you remember the fucking Don Zimmer, Pedro Martinez fight, Gavin? Yeah.

Did we do the action images of that or just the image of him getting... Did we show all the images? I made a little flip book that I've been going through. Oh, no. I mean, we looked at that one picture with the hat being pushed in his eyes, and then we watched the clip. Let me see if I can add all three of these. I've been bouncing back and forth between the three of them all day,

and I've been laughing so fucking hard I was looking them up for an for an idea I have for an image and then uh and then I noticed that I don't think I had ever seen I've never seen the stills from this angle I've seen the the hat one it's just amazing the one with his just it looks like he's dead on the ground i'm waiting for the third one to load oh okay you haven't seen it it's the best oh yes thank you jeff andrew i was telling i was filling time and i was telling gav that i uh oh yes i was looking at pictures of zimmer and pedro fighting today for a project that I want to do.

I can talk about, but I was talking about with Andrew earlier. And I realized that there are some awesome action photos. And I made like a little flip book on my Apple where I just like write trigger between them and just watch them fall. That's got to be a gift. But that last one, you could Photoshop a red rag into that guy's hands and it would be amazing it would be amazing i was i was at this is this is like walking back to christmas i was asking jeff about this earlier he sent me like the one we've all seen and i'm like is do you think there's a photographer that has like in the process of fall because i want to

see him right before impact i want to see him on impact this is great yeah the last one looks like his heart stopped like on that phrase i had an idea this morning i think it's okay to talk about if it's if if you're hearing this then we didn't cut it uh if you're not hearing it we cut it and you don't even know that we talked about it but i had an idea this morning gavin where uh i was telling andrew i showed it to him you know how they make mosaic images out of smaller versions of the same thing yeah so i was thinking we could it would be funny to make a giant mosaic art piece of don and pedro fighting call it the don pedro project but it's made out of baseball cards of don and pedro oh it's phenomenal and so i found a program online that'll do it and i counted up i need i found i just need Pedro. Oh, it's phenomenal. And so I found a program online that'll do it.

And I counted up. I need, I found, I just need to collect cards now. It's going to be about 2,030 cards, I think, is what it would take to make it. And so I just need like probably about 15 different Pedro and Don cards and then just hundreds of them. And then I can actually physically make this thing and put it together.

And it'd be like a giant, probably like 2,000 baseball card mosaic of them fighting we could auction that that'd be amazing for cherry i was telling andrea it belongs in a museum i mean it's not it doesn't exist yet but it does that would be a great instagram post too just being able to swipe between all three of those that's phenomenal absolutely yeah that's what that's all i've been doing at home since i've had that conversation with andrea has been swiping through that is a weird fucking tub andrew i have never tub never in my life seen that tub configuration the wall is directly behind the back of the tub that looks like a nice tub that

looks pretty no no it's a shit tub it is awful it stinks it's like a decent shower awful tub i see really tall like no space. It's very tight. So does that mean most of the time in the bath, you have a dry back? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it does. But well, no, typically, you know what? I try my best. I'm not perfect.

I'll eventually slide off that wall, and then I have a problem. I imagine it probably takes a lot of strength in your legs to maintain that position. Yeah, eventually I slide down, especially if I'm having like a bubble bath, it probably takes a lot of strength in your legs to maintain that position. Yeah. Eventually, I slide down, especially if I'm having a bubble bath. You get some slipperiness to the sides of the tub. It becomes difficult. I just can't

imagine you getting that and sitting down naked with no water in. It's such a weird little image. It's just like staring at your dick as it slowly starts to float as the water level rises. So weird. So was that something you learned as a kid?

Like, were you bathed? I don't think you learned it as an adult, Gavin. I don't... I don't know. I never put any thought into it. It's just, like, how I've had a bath. You also said in the last episode that you filled the tub up halfway. What do you mean? When you were describing getting in, you were like, I got in, I filled the tub up halfway. Yeah, yeah when you were describing getting in you were like i got in i filled the tub up halfway like is that like so no so no i guess

what i would have meant by that is i hopped in the tub and the water was about halfway so i felt ready to i got into it empty but when the water was halfway i was like okay now i can start moving stuff over got it like i feel good now you were you were you decided halfway was enough to initiate bath yes that was like i'm going to start moving things. But also, if you like a nice, hot, steamy bath, I can't imagine trying to wear an over-the-ear Xbox headset. I must get just sweaty as hell. I don't do it often.

It's a very rare case. That was like maybe the second time I've ever done that. In my bathing career, it was an experiment that will not be pursued. Now there's like shit all over the all over the earpieces no no it's good we're all good wherever you're going you better believe american express will be right there with you heading for adventure we'll help you breeze through security. Meeting friends a world away? You can use your travel credit.

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Terms apply. Speaking of Xbox Live headsets, my fucking daughter started playing Rainbow Six Siege again. And in an effort to spend time with her and connect with her, I've started playing too. And she has, and it's been nice. We've been bonding through it. But she has started to compile a list of video clips

of me panicking and freaking out and losing games for the team. And she, she's, she's very quickly amassed a very large amount of clips. It's fucking annoying.

And she loves to, she loves to show them to me. She loves to go, hey dad, remember when you did this? And it's like, ugh. Ugh. I don't know.

You'd have to ask her. You don't want to see me be... You saw me be bad at video games for like 15 years. You don't need to see it. It's brutal. It's brutal. It's like a dude walks in a room,

I go, ah! And I shoot everything around him, and then he turns around, looks at me, and walks over and stabs me. Shit like that, you know? Just like lost my ability. Lost all my hand-eye coordination. Pure panic.

What game are you worst at, do you think? Halo. I suck at Halo. For as much time as I've spent on it, I really suck at it. I don't know. I'm pretty bad at a lot of stuff. It's hard to pick. I feel like you hate TTT. Oh, I'm not great at any of the Gmod

games. I'm not great at any GT. I'm not good at a lot. But you're right. I definitely, I get confused by all the rules in all your Gmod games. They got way too complicated after I left the Gmod Hunter and I don't understand it all now. It's like you gotta be a fucking scientist.

It always sucks when you miss the beginning of something. It's hard to get involved. I mean, it takes a couple of games to get used to what the hell's going on in that did you speaking of did you see that easter egg that uh they posted today in the slack of that halo uh like warthog race thing no there was a an easter egg hidden in halo 5 on the evacuation level i believe it is i think it's like the second or third level where it's a timed event. And if you get to a certain spot, it initiates an Easter egg where it puts everybody on Warthogs

or on Mongoose. And you just do a Mongoose race to the end of the map with no enemies or to the end of a part of the map. And then when you get there, the person who wins the race gets heavy weapons for the rest of the level. And it was six years old

and nobody ever found it. And so just recently, the guy who was the level designer leaked it and was like, hey, nobody ever found it and so just recently they got the guy who was the level designer leaked it and was like hey check it out there's a video of it and i was like it's really it's really interesting brand new halo easter egg that's a four-player co-op pretty cool i wonder what the most elaborate easter egg is that hasn't been found there was that easter egg in that batman game where that first batman game that nobody found for like two years where you you had to break into that wall yeah yeah yeah that's pretty game that nobody found for like two years where you had to break into that room. Yeah, you blow up the wall.

Yeah, that was pretty cool. I wonder how many of those are undiscovered. Like just generally speaking. I bet a lot. Like most of them get found. You think so? I bet there's a ton out there. Yeah. And then also like, we'll define what is elaborate. I don't know if you know this, Gavin. I just learned, like I

played, you and I talked about how much we love Hitman. I loved Hitman Blood Money, one the games I've played the most of played endless endless amounts of hours into it I didn't know that you know the the wedding level or whatever like the southern you go to a southern wedding yeah with the chandelier and stuff yeah I recently learned like within the last year that there's a little button on the ground that you can shoot and if you shoot then like 20 naked guys just in their underwear run at you and do like a whole dance sequence and then they just walk away i yeah i've seen i think i've seen the clip from that i think i've seen i think it was in a speed run it was like at a gdq of some sort where someone showed that off you don't see

even better than easter eggs is just when you miss a fucking mechanic of the game. I don't know what exists. Gavin and I were talking about like what Hitman is. Hitman is a fascinating series because they haven't innovated a lot. I feel like if anything, they've kind of removed features over time and it has created improvements. And we're talking about what is the best thing they added. And Gavin said the ability to throw items. And I said, well, that's been around. And he said it's been in since absolution i said no it's been in since blood money gavin i taught gavin that you can throw things in blood money he refused he didn't know how many hours have you put in the blood money gavin without realizing you could throw

well i knew you could throw a coin i don't know if i because in absolution onwards you hold down left trigger and you just get a target. It's a guaranteed 100% accurate throw into someone's head. Yeah. So to me, that was the thing they added that I think would be a real struggle if they took out. But it's more manual in Blood Money, isn't it? I don't think I ever tried it.

It is. No, it is, but it's just you had no idea it existed. Yeah, I don't think I knew you could throw. I was blown away. I would have bet thousands on that. Was it covered in a tutorial, Andrew? Yeah, it's in the beginning of the game. They teach you.

There's a line about it. But I had missed it too, to be fair to him. I think that happens way commonly. I remember Bernie, he was like 40 hours into Fallout 3 when he discovered VATS. He was just aiming at shit. And I beat Cr crackdown without auto aim i didn't even know that's an absurd thing that's way worse than the vats yeah it's pretty

bad i feel like i feel like that happens a lot there's they throw so much information at you early on in video games now that it is very easy if you're not paying attention to miss one mechanic and they don't ever touch on it again i feel like that happens to me all the time yeah i think the last time it happened to me was sekiro i went through half of that game without realizing you could do like a dash move by by clicking b and uh that's a tough game there's a boss that i could not escape his area of effect attack like i try to run away and it almost always get me and i was like this is fucking impossible i didn't realize i just didn't know how to deal with it that was the issue wasn't that it was poorly designed i was probably 30 hours into cyberpunk before gavin mentioned double jump to me and i found out that that was a thing and that

changed the whole game yeah it totally changes the way you travel you have to buy that though right yeah yeah yeah it's like an upgrade yeah yeah so i mean that's a little different like you didn't start with that you also missed a mechanic in outer wilds andrew i can't remember what it was but that was like i think you found you found the ending without learning how to do something do you remember what i'm talking about i'm trying not to spoil it don't yeah i'm trying to yeah i'm trying to remember because the game you can only play once really it's like it's all about the discovery so i'm not going to say what it was but you were you like did a thing without recognizing the bit that teaches you how to do that yeah whereas i found the thing that teaches you and i was like wow i'm gonna go try that because i would i was stuck on

that part that was like during a time where they're like every game i seem to miss like a huge mechanic yeah like fast travel and control yeah i didn't i didn't know the fast travel control and i got through i beat beat Ghost Recon Breakpoint before realizing you had like a special you could do if you push like both bumpers or whatever. You had like a, you'd go into like a special mode like in Destiny. Not quite that elaborate, but like I just didn't know.

Dude, Barbara didn't know there was fast travel in Skyrim. I remember that being a big thing. She was like, she was spending a lot of fucking time traveling around that map. God, that must like triple or quadruple spending a lot of fucking time traveling around that map. God, that must triple or quadruple the amount of time you'd spend in that game. Yeah, but you'd probably level up like a motherfucker because you'd have encounters every 10 minutes, right?

You'd kill the frost trolls in the world. Speaking of things we don't know about, I feel like we have to discuss our Twitter account. What a fantastic reveal that was. I don't know if... I don't know about this. You don't know about this feel like we have to discuss our twitter account what a fantastic reveal that was i don't know if does everyone you don't know about this i'm familiar with what you're talking about i wasn't okay i i didn't know that we were going to discuss it or not but we'd look oh i feel well well no like did did you not see the person is handing off the account now yeah i saw the whole put okay great one of the reasons they mentioned is because I started following them on Twitter.

There's a f*** FacePod Twitter account, Gavin. And Instagram. Yeah, and Instagram. But we control the Instagram. But the Twitter was a thing that just popped up one day. I was like, I don't know who runs that. And they just were making posts. They'd take the Instagram posts.

They did content for it. They're regularly updating it uh it seemed very official but uh i i thought i asked eric do you know who runs this account eric had no idea i asked jeff jeff didn't know i was like oh i guess just somebody who's running this account that's really funny i really thought it was andrew no so you thought each other were running to eric no i no i we... I remembered having a conversation about it and I thought, we must have... I remember talking about it, so it must be legit and on the up and up.

I'm pretty sure Andrew's running it. It's whatever. I knew it was community run and that's why I didn't follow it. And then when you started following the account, I was like, well, I guess I'll just follow it too then. I guess we're all on board. This is fine. Somebody in the community is doing this. I had no idea who it was. They

recently just came forward because they reached 10,000 followers. They've been doing this for seven months, and they kept waiting for us to call them out for it, and we just never did. We're committed to the bit. Oh my god. That's such an us problem to have just like a bunch

of people shrugging me like i mean it's working yeah like they were doing an amazing job they posted constantly it was great yeah i it really was like i don't know who runs that that's probably a thing we should take care of but whatever like they're doing awesome i was just like i was just like we're not talking about it but andrew's doing a i was just like i was just like we're not talking about it but andrew's doing a really good job so i'll just let him keep doing it i didn't realize that you thought i did it i thought we're all on board and we're okay with i definitely know it wasn't one of us i thought you ran it no not at all so we've had this twitter account that like has existed for seven months and just crossed 10 000 they essentially were like i the panic mode for them was when jeff started following them and then the second one was

i guess uh they did a port-a-potty post and the official roosterteeth account tagged them in the post i like that there's we work for a company where there are several staff members just to deal with social media and none of those people are involved either. No, I like that it appears like it wasn't even a conversation amongst them of, like, who is doing this. Eric says you should see the Face Jam Instagram. Why should we see it? Yeah, what does that mean?

Sorry, I knocked over my mouse. There is a Face Jam Instagram account that that for a month and a half i had to convince lewis that we didn't own or run and no matter how many times i said yeah we don't have an instagram account he's he's like no i don't know what to do in that situation, but it's exactly like this where nobody runs it. Look at how many people that work for our company follow the Face Jam Instagram account. It is the same thing. This is wild. I can't believe this happened with two fucking shows that I have anything to do with.

This is ridiculous. It's amazing for such, for a company that was so involved in the internet from such an early time, you know, with internet companies. That's amazing that we don't, that so many people

are clueless to it. You know what's even funnier to me is that, well, I mean, I guess as of now, we absolutely run that Twitter account. Yeah.

And, you know, because we're fucking professionals. We don't have it yet, but we'll get it. By the time this episode comes out, we will have had it account. Yeah. And, you know, because we're fucking professionals. We don't have it yet, but we'll get it. By the time this episode comes out, we will have had it forever. Yeah. However, the thing that's craziest to me is that we do operate some Twitter accounts that the audience has no idea about. Like, like, we do have some stuff out there that we do.

Like, there are Twitter accounts related to face that exist out there. The audience has not found. You know, it's funny is one of them. You can tell when my phone broke because I was tweeting on it every day and then the tweets just stopped. That is my phone died. It's marked through that.

You have secret face related Twitter accounts. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we have a few. Yeah. He probably has. He probably has the ones I don't even know of but

i know of a few there's a few there's not i won't say anything there's a few there's a few that exist now i'm suspicious yeah you know they're show related you know one other thing i will say uh this is a bit of a side again going back to the bathroom stuff but i will say andrew we're talking about audience being surprised the audience was definitely surprised that you filled your bathtub while you were in it i was surprised at how many people came to your defense in terms of smashing up a cupcake in a bowl there were a lot of people out there that were like absolutely i do that too uh everybody does that. Totally normal. That seemed weird to me, but the audience really had your back on that one.

So congratulations there. I heard people suggesting, and I never even considered this, ripping the bottom part of the cupcake off and then putting that on top and making like a cupcake sandwich. That's an interesting idea. That is an interesting idea.

I mean, I just don't understand though. People just don't like cupcakes. Oh sure, Eric does it. It's a failed format for most people. I what i get people just don't like cupcakes oh sure eric does it is this it's a failed format for most people i don't understand why people don't like cupcakes i enjoy the cupcake a lot if you have to modify it then it's not right is it reinvent it make sandwiches i would never buy though what i have in a bowl like i would not pay money for that but i would pay for a bowl of bush no it looks disgusting but it's like you're distributing the icing amongst the rest of the cake evenly. I get it. I totally get it.

Yeah, it's a great thing. I guess you're increasing the surface area to staleness, so that's probably why you couldn't sell it that way. Sure. It just would look disgusting. It's not visually appealing in any way. I wanted to make sure we shut it out. I think his Twitter account is like solar424 or something that ran our Twitter, the f*** face Twitter. Did a great job. Fantastic job. Thanks, solar424. Really kicked the shit

out of that for us. Appreciate it. I have one other thing I need to talk about. I'm sorry. You might be disappointed. Especially you, Gavin. I don't know if my fire extinguisher is going to work. Oh, why? Yeah.

Well, because I didn't I didn't realize this. But when you use a fire extinguisher, you got to be what you do. Well, you pull the pin and then you use it. You're not supposed to pull the pin until usage time. I pulled the pin the day of our very first recording so my the fire extinguisher has been armed the entire time every episode we've done the pin it just makes it's a safety squeeze the handle it's like it's just a safety

yeah yeah but okay so there's a pressure gauge on my fire extinguisher, and it is deep in the red recharge zone. So I think this entire time, it's just been depressurizing slowly. I'm pretty sure you just got a partially filled, or like, depleted, I don't think the pin has anything to do with that, though. Yeah, no, he's right. Fire extinguishers don't maintain a charge forever.

You need to get them recharged, like at the fire department or some shit, pretty, like every two years or something so it probably just lost pressure naturally over time i see so me pulling the pin had no no because that's just like a little cotter pin that's not doing anything other than stopping you from hitting it accidentally got it okay well i feel less bad about that i had to pull the pin because it's where i could attach the pop filter onto the thing. It's the only part that would work and it wouldn't fit with the pin in there.

Yeah, so I had to pull the pin. You know, Eric brings up a good point. If it's deep in the red, it's probably not going to work anyway. You could squeeze it right now. Yeah, just see the range on it. It would be good to get a benchmark of how far red goes compared to how far green. No, because you can't do it multiple times.

You get one shot and i'm not gonna do i got a whole i think what is this episode 48 all right you got four fucking weeks to figure it out dude you gotta hit that button in 52 i have a plan i worked it out already i have an idea for how to make this work okay you're gonna shoot it into a bag though aren't you it's not gonna no no no no no no no no no no no no i had a i had a realization i'm not gonna spoil it but i have i have a way that i think this will work okay and i need to put it together but it's it's i have a thought you have a i don't see how this could fail you have a contraption you're going to construct uh a thing will need to be built yeah yes i'm trying to but judged off like previous face bits i'm trying to decide whether or not I'm going to get excited

About this or not Am I going to get my hopes up About this or is it going to be a salad cream That's what I'm trying to figure out I guess what I'm trying to figure out is Will I feel confident in that you feel one way about it And then just edit yourself out of it later That's where my head is at with that.

I can only control me. Four weeks. Four episodes. Oh, before we end this, and we should end it so I can go do anything else other than this. This is a joke. I got nothing else to do. We should talk about baseball bats. Gav, you weren't there. We had a meeting with

Merch right before this episode. And there's been an update on the knob situation. It was fine. However, you know, where we left off with the knob issue is that we were having trouble finding somebody to create just knobs for us. I made a suggestion that I could denob the bats myself with a chop saw.

Love that. Agree. Then you made the suggestion I was going to do 500. You made the suggestion that we probably need a thousand because previous

bat iterations have sold so quickly. We want it to be on sale for longer than 60 seconds. I think also it was the phrase thousand knob drop right.

It was a thousand knob drop. Yeah. And then somebody in the comments had a brilliant idea which was similar to an idea that I think we had actually in the episode about trying to pair up knobs to their bats and ways to do that but the henry's barking that damn fucking no idea um maybe a mailman or something just go for it buddy just keep going uh anyway so uh the the the reality

is is that a fucking baseball bat is expensive to ship and a thousand baseball bats shipping to my house is going to cost more than we could just to get them here so that i can cut them up would cost more probably than uh we could ever hope to sell them for i'm struggling to see how it could be that expensive to ship a thousand bats they're just it's a lot of wood man it's a lot of size it's pallets worth and so what we settled on is maybe we'll get a thousand maybe we'll get nine get a thousand bats made and i will get a hundred sent to me then i'll i'll lob off the knob on a hundred put in a tag on each one to number one through a hundred we've got we found these little metal tags that i can hammer in to to make it nice and then you'll have like a one in ten

chance when you buy a knob of getting one that i i made does that make sense but so yeah you're not making the knobs anymore i'm i'm gonna make a hundred out of a thousand so what's the other 900 they're not they're just gonna go they's the other 900? They're just going to go straight to the, I guess, they're just going to be knobs. They're no bats. They're just knobs. Why not just knob them all and then give you... I don't understand that at all. If the other

900 are going to be knobbed, why not just give those to you? What am I going to do with knobbed bats? What are you going to do with the ones that you've got again? I'm going to make them. I'm going to knob them what are you going to do with the ones that you've got again i'm gonna i'm gonna make them i'm gonna knob them i'm gonna knob a hundred and then the other ones will just be made as knobs so we're gonna make we're gonna get 900 knobs and 100 bats and then i'm gonna make it's not convoluted it's easy but if we can make the knobs just make a thousand knobs oh so i don't have to do any yeah i thought i thought, I thought the audience wanted my misery.

But if I don't have to make a knob, if I don't have to make a knob, I'm not going to make a knob. That's even better. You just let me out. No, Gavin's right. Gavin's right. We're going to get a thousand knobs made.

I don't have to touch shit. Problem solved. This is an awesome idea, Gavin. Not what I'm saying at all. Knob a thousand bats. 100% what you're saying. Ship all 1,000 to Jeff for him to sign or whatever. Fuck you.

I already signed stuff. No. I'll knob a bat. Andrew's not signed shit. I'll knob a bat, but I'm not going to, for a reason. But I can't do 1,000 because it's too expensive to get here. So I'll knob 100 bats, and those will be special bats. And you'll have a 1 in 10 chance of getting a special bat when you buy your bat.

I just freight shipped something that weighs way more than a thousand bats and it wasn't absurd. I think it can be done. I think that you should talk to the merch department and show up to the meetings if you want to have a say.

I, uh... What if you did a thousand nails? What about that? Or whatever you're going to hammer in? Is that a possible? I'm just throwing that out there. It's just a thought. I'm just...

Also, if we ship a full-size bat to an audience member, it's going to be like $20 just in shipping cost. On top of that. It's very expensive. Buying stuff online works, though. Big things cost more to ship. That's just how it works. But I don't want to make somebody pay a hundred bucks for a fucking day Jeff on this but I I feel like there's maybe a middle and they just want the knob man

They don't want the knobless bat. They just want the knob So why don't we just give them the knob and just get only knobs made that we were saving? Yeah, maybe a thousand knobs, ship them to Jeff. Jeff burns them, signs them, whatever. We're not talking about burning anything. That's off the table, dude. I agree to cut knobs. I will cut a hundred knobs.

No, no, no, no. That's fair. That's fine. No, I thought you were going to do a nail thing. I will do the nail thing on top of that. But I'm not going to do a thousand nails. There's no point in it. The whole idea do the nail thing. I will do the nail thing on top of that. But I'm not going to do a thousand nails. There's no point in it. The whole idea of the nail was that we had a knobless bat and we had a knob, right?

And before I separated the two, I put a little tag. I hammered a little metal tag into the knob that said 0008. And then I numbered a little tag into the top of the bat that said 008. And then when I cut it, they go into two different piles. And then maybe you buy a knob, and maybe you buy a knobless bat, and you end up with two different ones. And then maybe you enter in the thing online

and be like, hey, I've got knob 26. Is knobless bat 26 out there? And then you make a fucking friend and you become knob twins or whatever. But I don't think that's gonna be possible because bats are too fucking weighty and expensive. So we're just gonna do knobs, which is all the audience wants anyway.

But I think that the audience really latches on to the misery index of it with me. And so I'm agreeing to make, to be, I'll be miserable making a hundred knobs. I would have been way more miserable making a thousand.

It's just logistically very difficult to get in here. What's worse, making a hundred knobs or branding a thousand knobs? Well, I'd have to make a hundred knobs and brand those 100 knobs. So I'd say it's probably 6,000, half a dozen. What?

What? Why? What do you want? So you're not nailing the knobs? You're nailing the knobless bats? That was the idea for that? I'll nail the knobs too, yeah. Okay, well then that's what I'm saying.

I'll be honest. My Discord crashed in the middle of that, and I don't know most of what you just said. I mean, to be fair to you, I've been here the whole time. It's still confusing. There's constant knob talk, and I feel like people are saying bats when they should be saying knobs. I just think you could brand 1,000 knobs easier than making 100 bat knobs.

But nobody wants me to brand 1,000 knobs. They wanted me to make knobs. Why not? That's really annoying. That's blood and sweat in there. Eric. Oh, hold on a second. I got an idea. Thanks for listening to F*** Face.

Episode 48. Really appreciate it. If you want to go ahead and let a friend know about this podcast, we could really use it. Maybe buy a t-shirt or a hat. We got some knobs coming in the future. They may or may not be branded. Either way, at a minimum, you're going to have a 1 in 10 chance of getting a knob

made by Jeff. At least that's what I'm thinking. Also, we got a little surprise dropping at the end of the month for you guys in terms of content. Keep your eyes open for that. As always, write a review and hopefully we'll see you next week. Thanks lot everybody Nick go ahead and roll that outro music yeah follow the

Twitter as well oh yeah let's get the Twitter up to like our Instagrams are like 30,000 subscribers or something we should get that we should catch that Twitter up especially now that we're not fucking around with Twitter anymore so who's running it