Regulation Podcast - The Royal We // The Infinity Pizza [89]

Episode Date: February 9, 2022

Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about Andrew wanting to skateboard but doesn't want to break in half, bad mood at dinner, the next british food tasting selection, is blood water, Donkey Kong Rap & bet, not joining a hockey team, and PUBG chicken. If you want to send your towel cards in, send to: Infinity Towel, 1901 e. 51st st, Austin, TX 78723 Want to contribute to bits? Email what you can do to [e-mail] Sponsored by Hello Tushy (http://hellotushy.com/face), ExpressVPN (http://expressvpn.com/face), and HelloFresh (http://hellofresh.com/face16 and use code face16) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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16 free meals plus three free gifts. This is a Rooster Teeth production. Okay. We're back. Tiki Mugs have been out a week now. Thank you for buying them based off of that great read,

that great promotion that we had. I'm sure they flew off the shelves. Let's fill. We can start that way. Hello and welcome. What? What? We hadn't started?

What do you mean we can start that way? We haven't started? I thought we started. Why would you think we'd started? Because we always... Have you even heard Gavin? Is he around? Yeah. Okay.

Jesus Christ. I'm worried about speaking, to be honest. Is everybody recording? Yes. Okay. Hello and welcome to another episode of the podcast this is episode 89 my name is jeff ramsey and with me as always uh the other two yes hello other two hello what uh but andrew you were saying uh in the pre-start not the pleasantries but the pre-start, not the pleasantries, but the pre-start,

that the pink tiki mugs or tiki toilets, as I affectionately refer to them, have been flying off the shelves thanks to Gavin's stellar promotion last episode in the last 30 seconds. I would hope so because they're awesome.

They are really good. I genuinely think they're great and I'm just so excited for them. We've done merch meetings for months where it's been a thing that has been brought up of where are the mugs? Where are the tiki mugs? I'm so happy they're finally here. I can't wait to get one. So what happened to the

originals? Okay, I can answer this. So originally we got... So first off, it took a while for them to build a prototype, right? They had to design it in the 3D space. Then I think they did a 3 for them to build a prototype right they had to design it in the 3d space then i think they did like a 3d print to test it and come up with it uh just right uh i think that was like tony and tobin and those guys did all that and then they sent it off to a manufacturer manufacturer sent back samples i apologize i'm getting this wrong ecom team but

uh i believe the samples came back and they were not of the quality that we felt comfortable with. And so we went through a couple rounds of that. Could never get it just right. So they went to a different distributor. And then supply chain issues became a reality. And so that's why it took an extra long amount of time. But now we got them. Well, we had them.

They may already all be gone by now because we're recording in the future. We have to record 800 episodes in the future, apparently. Should we get into that? Well, before we get into that, the last thing on merch. You brought up the skateboard last episode. Oh, right.

I kind of want one because I want to try to... I haven't attempted to ride a skateboard since the MVP accident. I retired on that day. I want to try to I haven't I haven't attempted to ride a skateboard since the MVP accident I retired on that day I want to try to ride a skateboard again I feel like this would be the perfect time to try it the only thing the only thing that's holding me back to fully committing

this idea is that Tom Segura exists and he tried to dunk a basketball which you wouldn't think would be disastrous but didn't he like broke his whole body in half and had to have like serious surgery snapped his arm in half so it was bent backwards but that wasn't even the worst part he like he tore like a patella or something in his knee and like basically ended his leg and like had to do had to go through like multiple surgeries to

repair it all yeah uh but he was trying to jump. You're just trying to skate. Yeah, but I'm going to like there's no way I don't eat shit. And Gavin has already got me concerned about death. Why? Why? Because even door handles are dangerous in Gavin's world.

Well, because door handles are dangerous. Aren't and I could be wrong. Maybe Jeff said it. I don't remember at this point. Weren't you the one that asked will we all be alive eight years?

Oh, yeah. I just don't think that. I just wonder. I wonder. Was that you that said it? Not Gavin? No, I didn't think that. I just wonder. I wonder. Was that you that said it? Not Gavin? No, I didn't say that. I said I'd try and stay alive a little bit.

That's not a very Gavin thing to say. No, it's not. But you both have death on my mind because you said that, Jeff. That's, you know, a death thing. Then a few weeks ago, several weeks, several episodes at this point, Gavin, you told a story about how in the snow you would walk by houses and if there weren't footprints then you would be like are they dead you'd play play the dead called it a game where you would try to decide if somebody had died or not guess they might be dead yep yeah

you said that there is a red car parked outside of my apartment that I could see and it had snow snow and nobody went to it for like six days and I had never thought about it before but now every time I see that car I wonder if that person's dead. Every time I look out my window I'm confronted with the thought of death because of you. It was something I never thought about

but now it's all I can think about. I got death on the brain. I'd be terrified of getting on the board but I might do it. I don't know. I'm on the fence. You're going to of getting on the board, but I might do it. I don't know. I'm on the fence. You're going to just be looking at that differently for forever now. Forever. Until that, literally until,

unless somebody gets in that car and drives away, which I don't think it's been turned on and probably over a month at this point, that car is fucking dead. Well, maybe it's because there's snow everywhere. They don't want to drive. No, it's sunny out now. There's no snow.

I've never seen anyone touch that car ever. Maybe the car is abandoned. Our friend Gus one time had an old car that he kind of gave up on and he had it parked on the street in front of his house

and then he moved to a new house and he just left the car there. And for like three or four months, he eventually had it towed, I think, but for like three or four months we would drive by

and people would just put signs on it that were like please for the love of god remove this car it's not funny anymore what's going on when when i went by with him someone had chucked like a dozen eggs on it yeah did you think they would have felt pretty they would have felt bad about themselves if he had just been dead in that house the whole time. I was just egging the poor dead person's car. I can go out to check the car and it's going to have ham fans. It's the license plate. What? Dude,

I'll do you one better. What if somebody's dead in the car? Nah, I think I'd know. I think that would be discovered. Probably steam up on the inside. You think so? I think so. What were or are you gonna say jeff before i took it to death you're gonna take us somewhere no i don't know you're leading us you're doing you're doing you're doing a really good job thanks uh you were saying you want a skateboard

so yeah before that i brought us to skateboard talk but you're gonna take us somewhere else i didn't want to step on because you i don't know, dude. As of two weeks ago, you have teased subjects that you had written, and we still haven't covered them. Oh, God. They weren't... One of them was... Well, okay. So you know how we had the idea for...

This might inspire a longer conversation than the other. Am I recording? Okay. Why would you say that? I was just curious. I was pretty sure I was. Okay.

The one who was livid that we hadn't started the show yet is the one who didn't know when he was recording. I'll do this one first. So I was listening to Planet Money the other day, which is where we got the,

they're the people that inspired the superhero conversation. So mine and their content to steal more ideas. Actually, not. It was just like, you know how you play on Alexa? You can say like,

play my daily briefing or whatever, and then it'll just play. And then when it's over, it just keeps playing forever. It'll just keep throwing shit at you. Well, it threw some planet money at me after my briefing was over. And it was interesting.

It was on the subject of sound IDs. And I don't know if you know what that is, Andrew. I had this conversation with Gavin actually in person because we went out to dinner the other night, which by the way, I had a lovely time at dinner with Gavin and his wonderful girlfriend, Meg, and my girlfriend and another friend.

But man, were you in a bad mood at dinner? I don't know what your deal was. It's not gonna work every week, you said that. I'm not, i know i'm serious we left and emily was like we were in the car and emily was like what was wrong with gavin and i was like i don't know what what do you mean i don't know ask her are you being serious you came across as like really surly and annoyed and i i didn't know if it was because your friend was there or what but it was bizarre is it because we sat down to the meal and you said,

why are you in such a bad mood? Did I? You're making me self-conscious about when am I in a bad mood? Is Emily there? No, she's at work, man. I'll ask her tonight when she gets home if she remembers why she said that.

She seemed real concerned. Man, I thought it was a nice time. Now I'm going to be second guessing every time we hang out. Trying to remember what happened. I like that this whole part started with Gavin saying, well, that's not going to work every week. And now we're here. I guess it works every week.

He gets me every week with it. It really does. Oh, man. that's great. But if Emily said it, then it's real. Nah, she didn't. I made that part up, but thank you. Anyway, but thanks for showing me that your skin is still as thin as tissue paper.

You keep worrying me. God, I appreciate that. Man, that felt great. That made me feel good on the inside. You made me feel good about me. Briefly there. I appreciate that. Man, that felt great. That felt really, that made me feel good on the inside. You made me feel good about me. Briefly there. Appreciate that. Anyway, so I already had this idea with Gavin.

He was in a great mood, by the way. Lovely. We had a wonderful dinner. Everybody had it. We laughed. Everybody was just over the moon. Talked about how we should do it more often. We enjoy each other's company so much.

It was a delightful evening from start to finish. Not a negative moment throughout the evening. Except it was windy outside. I think we all agree it was too windy. It was a delightful evening from start to finish. Not a negative moment throughout the evening. Except it was windy outside. I think we all agree it was too windy. It was too windy. Could have rang the doorbell. So anyway, on this Planet Money thing, it was all about sound IDs,

which is not something I'd ever thought of before. But a sound ID is like when you turn on HBO in the old days and it would go the snow, and then it would do the HBO sound, like the dun dun dun or whatever that's not anybody's sound idea it's uh because now that i'm thinking of it all sound ids have fled my brain uh or like when you you know when you load up hulu or when you get like a text from fate like in facebook you get like a instant message or something it makes an identifiable sound that you subconsciously start to recognize and associate with that product.

And it was all about how, actually, HBO, I guess, was spending like a bunch of money and effort trying to recreate new sound IDs that made sense for the current times because they'd felt that theirs were dated. It wasn't just about HBO. It was about some other businesses, too. And about like the science that goes into it and how to perfectly, like how difficult it is to kind of perfectly

design a short interstitial sound that then becomes synonymous with that brand in a positive way. And as I was going through all that, I was thinking like man, F***face could really benefit from a sound ID. Like what would our sound ID, like our like, you hear it and you instantly think of F*** Face be?

So I was just opening that up for conversation. Because we also, we have been discussing, and we may already have it at this point. But if we don't yet, audience, I would love your assistance. We want to build a soundboard of F*** Face sounds for the break show. With, like, you know, Andrew saying, like, my name's Andrew Pan and I will eat the pencil. And, like you know andrew saying like my name is andrew pan and i will eat the pencil and like all the other different funny things that we say uh maybe like soda burping and and that time andrew farted on on uh on mike uh whatever your favorite little audio moments are but uh i'd like to collect those for a soundboard but also like

what should our i mean i assume it would be the groan tube sound but I just wanted to see what you guys thought what should face a sound ID be so can anything be is any so because I'm thinking like what about the Wilhelm scream is that a sound ID

does somebody own that does somebody make money every time Wilhelm dies how does that work I mean I think it was made from like a Does somebody own that does somebody make money every time Wilhelm dies? How does that work? I think it was made from like a big audio library wasn't it was it? Is that his name will helm where the name will helm come from? Oh? Also has he died more than Sean Bean who is more total movie I definitely? Definitely well more than I mean I used to know the answer that I googled at once, but I don't remember now I think it's an interesting idea. I like I like the insanity. I used to know the answer to that. I googled it once, but I don't remember now. I think it's an interesting idea. I like the sound idea. I never considered

what the sound of f***face would be. I think it would be the sound of someone getting kicked and then like a kid crying. That never happened. It was close to happen, but it didn't happen. Man, talk about becoming an even less Sponsorable podcast

It's called F*** Face It's got a kid crying at the beginning of every episode Anyway, just something for y'all to think about I am excited to see the responses for that Because this is such a Fucking, their show is so dumb the things that i forget that we did like genuinely like two nights ago i was getting it was late i was going to bed and i just randomly had this realization that we we we've put garlic

on our feet and i forgot that we had done that oh my god was in a garlic bag gavin spread it like it was toast on his foot we did a whole we covered our foot in garlic and i forgot about it that was not a thing that i forgot about that too yeah god fucking crazy oh that's low enough to not register as one of the things that was've done. That was my thought. So weird. How did I forget that? Oh, it was terrible. It was gross. That was disgusting. Do you know, Jeff, that food-wise we've discovered Andrew's next

British food that he's going to try on the podcast? No, what is it? We're going to go for Marmite. Oh, yeah. Marmite. Because it's quite an obvious one. I feel like it's a bit of a low-hanging fruit You've never had Marmite or Vegemite right? I do we I thought we were going with the whole box of items is that off the table Are we doing the Brit? Nick's never had it either, but I have a feeling Nick would eat it and be like oh I like it

This is good, and then you squirt the whole thing in his mouth. I want to pay Gavin to make me a subscription-style box of British items. A Brit box? Exactly. This came up because I said I was watching something on Brit box, which is like a streaming service. I was like, that sounds like a subscription food thing where an American company would try to trick people

into that these are like classic British items nice subscription to your salad creams and your branch pickle your Marmite I'd love a Brit box I'm excited to try I forgot that that was my next item so you want me to do your whole box I would I think it would be funny

to do a whole box but you don't have to you can start small Marmite is there a box worth of stuff I'm missing? There has to be. Yeah. Yeah. I could get you a box together. Okay.

Well, maybe we do the Brit box in the future. Wherever you're going, you better believe American Express will be right there with you. Heading for adventure? We'll help you breeze through security. Meeting friends a world away? You can use your travel credit. Squeezing every drop out of the last day? How about a 4 p.m. late

checkout? Just need a nice place to settle in? Enjoy your room upgrade. Wherever you go, we'll go together. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca slash ymx benefits vary by card terms apply i have a thing i don't know what it means and i've been meaning to talk about it for two episodes now jingle jingle jingle i was listening i know what that

means and so do you but um i was listening to i was listening to something and they brought up the phrase the royal we they're saying like we and then they pause and they're like well the royal we isn't this on your on your album of 10 episodes to record though I feel like I saw this on the notes you sent me it is so you're skipping ahead you're going you're

breaking into the album content oh no wait time out we added everything this podcast coming to a halt for a second those were what are you talking about Jeff wait time out we had everything this podcast coming to a halt for a second what are you talking about Jeff I thought we were holding off for like our marathon recording week

this is part of the marathon recording I thought that started the first week of February is when we were going to do that no this is what I thought this was just the lead up to that no this is I didn't consider this was so this is so is this in your mind song one or song two we're in track two right now jeff track two so last episode was track one last episode was track one i had no idea we were even we had

even turned the cd player on why would we wait why would why we have to record i didn't know how many we record i thought we might record three. Jeff thought this was pleasantries. Jeff thought this was pleasantries. I thought this was the preamble to the album of recordings. No, you're saying that I'm jumping the gun. This was something I wrote for track one. Didn't even get used to track one. Almost all track one is available.

Track three is the best though, right? Track three is always the best though right track three is always the best almost always almost always i later wrote down in track one that i expected jeff to start using the topics i sent him to fuck with me which he ended up doing but not realizing he was doing it it was accidental just him not understanding the system i thought i thought we're gonna open the show and jeff's gonna be like since i sent him my notes for the first recording he's immediately just gonna go into what i sent him as like this is i want to do you share notes now when's this no because of the uh no it's

because of you because we're yeah it's because of you we thought you would be gone for like eight months and so we're i'm like we're gonna record 12 episodes in two weeks to cover for gavin being busy so i was like i'm approaching this like i gotta like spread shit out and so if we're trying to fill 12 or 13 episodes in a short time i was like we should send notes we've never done this before this is these are my notes why can't i see the notes i don't know why you can't because you didn't reply to jingle jingle honestly because i, because I felt weird to then follow up. You didn't get the notes because of that. If it helps, Gavin, I didn't send him shit.

He just sent me the notes and I looked at him and went, okay. If we didn't record today, Jingle Jingle Jingle would have been the last entry in our text, potentially forever. Why? Are you planning on never responding after this? Who, me? Yeah, why would it be potentially forever? Because he didn't want to say anything after I didn't reply to Jingle Jingle Jingle. No, I would have replied today, but I felt like I had to wait for yesterday.

Anyway, so we decided that if we have to plan 10 or 12 tracks worth of content, that it might behoove us to share notes just so that we can build out some of the content. To make sure they're all equally, they have stuff in them. Like, that was the idea. Sounds like that's not really the case anyway, uh, cause you're not gonna be gone as long as we thought or whatever, so I guess, I don't know. I don't know what this does to your

album structure. I don't think it'd be very good if we had to actually do like eight at once. What a fucking stupid conversation we just had. Well. I just wanted to talk about the royal you. You did this. And not the royal you. The royal we. You specifically. Not no. Not the royal us. You. Just you.

The royal you. What do you mean? What are you confused about? No, Jeff. Not us. The royal When people say the royal Royal you I don't know what it means but I know what it means wait when you say the Royal you you're just using a term you've heard well that's sort of what I'm saying I know I

know what it means when someone says okay I'll just give the example which I heard they said we and then they paused and then they said well not we you know the royal we the royal we the term the royal we i believe means we as like a collective not specifically us just like aetically us. Not us personally, us as a group. Right? Does this make, am I, do I just not know? No, this is great. Keep going.

I'm right, but I don't know why, I guess, is what I'm saying. Like, I don't, is it at all connected to royalty? What is the royal, like, why is it the royal we? Why is it the royal what? I don't know, like, why is it the royal we? Why is it the royal what? I don't know, like, I never questioned that. The royal we, the first person plural used by a person with supreme

authority, or in modern times, sometimes we preserve anonymity. Supposedly the first king to use we in this way was Richard I in the Charter to Winchester, Gavin knows all about this, Charter to Winchester 1190. I mean,. Charter to Winchester, 1190. I mean, I'm sure you could probably take off from there and just regale us with

British knowledge, but I'll just keep going. We are not amused is a rebuke often attributed to straight-laced Queen Victoria in the 20th century. I'm putting myself to sleep reading this. Who cares? You are. I mean, this is very boring. I just don't know what it means. I don't know where the royal comes from in the royal we or the royal you.

I get the word that follows. The royal part, I never understand why it's there and why it means what it means. And it sounds like I'm not alone. I don't think anyone here does. And that makes me feel better. I didn't know if it was a me thing or if that was just the thing that people didn't know. I don't know that I've ever heard anybody say the royal you. Uh, yeah, that's's that's less than use i hear the royal we all the time yeah uh to include like like a lot yeah you is very specific that was a terrible example to use for it but the royal we

well what if what if you what if you i mean sometimes you doesn't mean you the person you're talking to it doesn't one is what you can say like uh you know getting on a plane allows you to go skydiving but it doesn't necessarily mean you're gonna go skydiving that's true the royal you is gonna go skydiving yeah the entire country jumps out let's like that I don't know what like blood is thicker than water

I know what that means but I don't know what like what I don't huh what does that mean the expression the phrase are you just listing off

different expressions that you know no I don't know what they mean it's like the royal thing I don't know what the royal means I don't know what

any of that means either the royal like when you say like the royal we, I think it harkens back to like everybody in the kingdom. Right? Like everybody under the everybody in the serfdom or whatever of that royalty.

It's kind of the etymology of that. There's an example on Wikipedia where there's basically like a land dispute and the king writes that we have arrived at this decision blah blah is blood water what is blood made a lot water in it it's water right it's the water base blood has water in it everything has water in it everything that was going to be my next i realized that i don't know what blood is it's water and every liquid is water well there's different amounts of water in different liquids.

Probably less in syrup or oil. But it's all... All forms of liquid have water in them. I would say so. Uh... Maybe not. Maybe not like certain gases in liquid form. Huh. Yeah, things can be in a liquid state.

Like liquid nitrogen doesn't have water in it. How thick is blood? It's viscous. Is water in... It's just a weird expression. Because I would... Blood is thicker than water, but it's not...

It's not thicker than gravy. Depends on the gravy, though. That's true i guess it's definitely not thicker than like like white sausage biscuit gravy but it might be thicker you're not gonna get the money you're not even related to him by gravy and by the way the answer is no according to the internet water is one of many liquids but but not necessarily all liquids. Okay. Thank you. Mercury has no water in it

when it's in liquid form. Yeah, I guess any base element, if it doesn't have hydrogen or oxygen, there's no water in it. Okay. Okay. I was going to say something dumb. I'm not going to. We're going to move past it. You were going to say something dumb? Yeah. It's fine you ever you ever

fuck up and then nobody notices that was not one of those times you had one of those recently we're like you royally fuck something up royally ha that was an accident bounce back from the bread clip baby drop it in a royally accidentally um for the audience he's referencing the bread clip joke that fell flat last episode a week ago for you but about 30 minutes ago for us yes i uh what's going on gavin i just can't believe how much that tripped you up i thought it was a fine comment. You really just dwelled on that bread clip comment. You got in your head about it pretty hard.

No, you guys weren't there. You didn't deliver it. I was apparently messing up left and right last episode. My O's weren't good. I wasn't laughing at the bread clip comment. You had a terrible O. It was brutal. i had a bad oh if that was the example of oh i would have it taken out of the i would just have it removed

as a letter i'd be like we don't need it we go down to 25 not if that's what it's gonna be it felt like i don't know like if if you throw a hail mary and everybody's like watching like oh man is it gonna is it gonna land and you threw it out of the stadium is how it felt like like not only did it not land but how big it couldn't have missed further it was three layers so who knows how many seats it leaves a lot a lot of room to guess

oh oh man go ahead no I'm just gonna you're in a weird hole I just don't know where... I don't know where you're going. I was trying to get into... We pivot into weird...

I fucked up recently. Are you talking about when you try and hide that you've made a mistake or that you just get away with it without even doing anything? Both. How often do you get away with it

in the course of this podcast? But when it does happen, there's that moment of like you start sweating that someone's going to call you on it. I had a really bad one recently, so I'm bringing it up. I'm just curious if you have had those. This is one that I think will stick with me

for a while. I mean, I think everybody probably has had those at some point in their life, but why don't you dive into this one? I was reading the Donkey Kong rap. This one does. I'm talking about the Donkey Kong rap, and that is funny because there are, in the Donkey Kong rap. This one does. Talking about the Donkey Kong rap. And that is funny because there are in the Donkey Kong rap. There is like the first two verses are all very complimentary. It's like Donkey Kong is great.

Let's talk about how great Donkey Kong is. Then the next time they're great. And then it goes to Lanky Kong and Lanky Kong versus just shitting on Lanky Kong. Well, he has no style. He has no grace. This Kong has a funny face like it's just they're just fucking shitting on lanky kong he doesn't get a great verse and so i was trying to prove that point so i was reading i was reading the lyrics to it and i i got to the the lanky kong part and uh i should have I should have I should have wrote this down but essentially

it ends with this Kong really digs this tune as the end of the lyric something like that ends with tune is the final word I misread the exclamation as an L and I said this Kong really digs this tunnel not only was it spelled wrong if it was tunnel, but I said this to a group of eight people, but it was within the context of me talking about how shit the verse is. So I was like, this Kong really digs this tunnel. Somebody went, tunnel? And I immediately realized as soon as I said it it now i fucked up tune with the exclamation and turned to be tunel based on how i'd read it and just nobody noticed nobody called on it

they're just like yeah i guess that is wow what a weird rhyme nobody said anything it registered that tunnel didn't at all fit but because of how much talk was said about how shitty the verse was and that it didn't flow very well when did you realize later on like after the conversation oh as soon as the l as soon as the all in tunnel left my mouth i realized what i had done so what you could have just corrected yourself well so i'm i thought about it and then because i thought about it too much time had passed by the time it came to make that decision it was like eight seconds had passed and am i really gonna like hey i need to we need to go back to that let me explain the moment had passed i didn't

feel like i could correct it it wasn't like the bread clip or me saying my dynasty being or whatever i fucking whatever that was to which time it passed the moment it passed I couldn't correct it so this is curious it's been that happened four days ago I think about it constantly it hasn't left my brain this Kong really digs this tunnel so looking at the lyrics the end of that verse is inflate himself just like a balloon. This crazy Kong just digs this tune. He would have had to have said, he would have had to have inflated himself like a balunnel.

It was bad. It has haunted me, so I was just curious. I was curious if either of you had that recently. I used to love that Donkey Kong rep. Can I ask you guys a question? Oh, it's terrible. Where does it come from? Donkey Kong 64.

Oh, is it from the soundtrack of the game? It's like the first thing that happens when you turn the game on. Oh i never played it so i don't know okay gotcha we have a bet we have a donkey kong bet we haven't talked to you about jeff you're gonna have an opportunity to experience donkey kong that is part of the redemption year okay so i gavin gavin's like childhood game and we talked about on the show show at the time. Loved it. Loved it. He could never beat it. So then I was like, you know what? I'm going to finish it.

I even made a Twitch account at that time called Andrew the Donkey Kong Guy. And then I got far. I got 80% of the way through the game. And then I lost my save file. It just finished. It crashed. And there's a lot to do in that game.

And so I've been thinking about giving it another try, but I can't just... It's not the greatest of games. It's not all that much fun to play. People speak of it so fondly, though. I think it's a nostalgia thing, but it's not a great game. So I thought, if I'm going to do this again,

there needs to be odds. We need to have something on the line for it. So I pitched Gavin a Donkey Kong bat. I will stream. I will do everything like I did before. I'll stream it again, but this time on the FFacePod Twitch account, which is a thing we have but have never used. I'll stream it.

I have 48 hours to beat it. And I plan on just trying to play as much as I can continuously. To beat it or 100% it? To finish it, not 100% it. So you're just going to beat K. Rool at the end? I do. I have to hit credits or whatever to beat the final boss. At any percent?

At any percent. How long is it supposed to take to finish? Apparently like 30 hours is the average playthrough. Okay. So you've got 48 hours. Now here's something when we discussed on text, we were sort of figuring out. I was trying to think of ways you could, well, cheat, basically.

Pull an Android. I have no plans. Are you allowed to use glitches or skips? No. Okay. You're just going to play. Yeah. If one happens accidentally, I don't think that disqualifies me. Like, if I'm jumping through a wall and I just end up through it, I don't think that,qualifies me like if i'm jumping through a wall and i just like end up through it i don't think that if it's a bug or a glitch that helps me but it's done

accidentally i think i'm fine and you'll be using you'll be using uh earth hours not like lunar or like martian hours i'll be using i'll be using earth hours okay um so you've got 48 earth hours yeah i don't we need to i guess figure out i'm not sure when you're gonna have to cheat somehow and i'm just trying to think ahead of how you're gonna i'm either gonna cheat or lose and that's where we come to the stakes of this bet because every every bet needs stakes i have a victory thing we can talk about this because gavin doesn't know i had this idea for it uh if i lose this is what we came up with we can we can workshop this i'd like to hear your thoughts on it jeff you know my feelings on bananas if i lose this bet i have to eat a banana

every day for the next 64 days you know what first off i think that makes sense in a lot of ways but i'm glad you brought up bananas i i i went ahead and closed down my banana research because i didn't think we'd ever get back to bananas. But I did a little bit of reading on bananas. Did you know there are over a thousand varieties of banana that vary wildly in taste and consistency? I think that there probably is a banana out there for you, Andrew. You just haven't found it because you're eating the Cavendish banana, which is like the by far the most common available banana. That's very possible. You could totally be right. And I don't mind the taste. It's really a texture thing. So

assuming there's a range in the same way apples has, there's a scenario in which I can all of a sudden like a banana from an obscure banana. So I'd have to eat 64 bananas in a row every day. I'd be open to recording that process and I don't know if we could it would be terrible but something could maybe come from that on this non. Can you now can you rate every banana in the moment as you eat it? I could. For 64 bananas?

Eric just said wait. Hang on I'm confused. I just want to get clarification. You're saying you have to eat 64 bananas in one day? No, I have to eat one banana a day for 64 days. Oh, okay, okay. It was confusing the way he said it, Eric. Yeah, okay, cool,

because I thought you were going to die from potassium poisoning, so I wanted to make sure that I wasn't part of that. Thank you. No, no, no, once a day. One banana a day. For 64 days. And you were originally telling me this as the punishment, and I was just thinking,

I could easily do that, and it wouldn't be a punishment. And then I remembered how much you hate bananas, and I just thought, that's absolutely perfect. Because you're going to get so sick of them. Like a week in, you're just going to be dreading your daily banana. So this is the idea I have. We can workshop. We can workshop this, but this is

just my original thought. If I win the bet, I was trying to think of things because it's complicated to come up with a victory thing for me. I'll give you a free skateboard. Free skateboard? No. If I win the bet, because you also do this podcast

and you also do the RT podcast, which is a visual, there's a video component to that show. You're speaking to Gavin. I'm speaking to Gavin. If I win this bet, you have to record an episode of the RT podcast wearing 64 different pieces of clothing.

I like this. Yes, yes, yes. Yeah, alright, yes. Yeah, all right, Joey. Like, what? How is that? Where'd you get that from? You're going to pick 64 coats. I'm going to die of heat stroke.

I pick one. I can pick one piece of the 64. You can pick the rest. Okay, I have to... A whole 90 minutes? A whole 90 minutes. Can I wear one of those beer helmets with water for hydration? Yes, absolutely.

Because I'm going to have restricted limb movement. Yeah, no, you can. That's an article of clothing. Oh, what if I just wear like 30 ties? Then you'd need to come up with 34 more items of clothing to go with it. Hmm. Do you have 30 ties?

I've got two. Who needs more than two ties? No, I agree. I agree. I'm not arguing. Oh, man. I like the terms. I certainly, as an impartial judge or just an impartial observer, I would certainly sign off on those terms. I certainly as an impartial judge or just an impartial observer,

I would certainly sign off on those terms. Eric is asking, is jewelry clothes? Jewelry is not clothing. I think the biggest problem here is that it's really easy for Andrew to beat a 30-hour game in a 48-hour window. I don't know why that's difficult.

It's difficult if I only do that. What do you mean? Is the it hard? Is the game hard? Yes. It's a tedious, difficult... There are parts of it that are very difficult. That's why Gavin never beat it.

I mean, he will have to beat original Donkey Kong again on the arcade. Yeah. And there's the slide thing I have to do. That's a fucking nightmare. There are a few parts of that game that are incredibly difficult. Yeah, it's not... It's not that easy. It's not hard. There's just some really of that game that are incredibly difficult. Yeah, it's not, uh... It's not that easy.

It's not hard. There's just some really, like... There's some sticking points in it. I just feel like he was gonna spend that 30 hours playing Halo anyway, so now he's just gonna switch to a different console. I don't understand your point.

Are you saying 48 hours is maybe too long? I think it's too much time. That gives him two nine-hour sleeping sessions. But there's no life outside of that. Yeah, you get a 15 hour day of play. Video games is your life. We love it. What's the longest video game stint you've had ever?

Ever? Yeah. I don't I'd have to probably like six or seven. Probably like eight hours when I was playing Halo 2 and I'd stay up all night playing it. Well, I guess that's probably the longest. You know, I feel like you can do this. To be honest, I'm sick of you losing the bets. Like, I'm really ruined.

Oh, no, I don't want a pity bet. I beat you in the Halo bet. I want you to have a decent chance, and you've never had a chance with the burgers. Reduce it. Reduce it to 44 hours. I'm not taking any pity victories. No, no, no.

Listen, we're not. Nobody's trying. I'm just saying. Gavin, if I were you, I would start collecting ties. What if you're allowed? It's 44 hours, but you're allowed to purchase an extra four hours for free. You can have them,

but you have to make that call in the first 24 hours. Okay. Okay. Why wouldn't I make that call, though? Yeah. Well, you know, it's just... Why wouldn't I?

Whether you want to give up on doing it in 44, pretty early. Okay. So it's a pride thing. I can get behind that. Because I think the only real,

the only person you're battling half the time is yourself and your own confidence. That's true. Uh-huh. It is true. Yeah.

It is true. Do you want to hear a really embarrassing story of my confidence? I hadn't thought about until recently. Is it related to the Denver Nuggets? It's related to sports.

This is like, I think this might be, I was going to say when I told the story, this is maybe the first example of burger confidence, but that's not true. There were previous instances, but this is classic burger confidence. I'm in the fourth grade, I want to say at this time.

And I don't know how to ice skate. Not an ice skater. I don't know how to rollerblade, but the local hockey team came to our class that day and they were like doing a thing where it's like, ah, we're going around the schools. You meet the team,

they hang out, they help you with some of the assignments. And then at the end of the day, you get to play hockey with the team. And it's just, it either means skates or just run in the gym. I had convinced myself as a child that there is a scenario

in which I could join the hockey team based off of this experience. I was sat at my desk at lunch being like, what if they, what if I'm so good and I don't like hockey? I never play hockey, but in my head I was convinced like, what if I happen to be so good at ice hockey?

It's not even ice hockey, it's floor hockey. And you hadn't seen a movie with a monkey on ice skates no i have mvp1 mvp1 is about it's about a monkey playing ice maybe it's all tied to mvp my confidence it's all ice skating and monkey related but i thought i genuinely believed that there was a possibility that they would ask me to join the team based off of my hockey playing. I was dreadful. I didn't like it. I was just bad at hockey.

I didn't know how to skate. They're a nice hockey team. I didn't know how to skate. But I spent a large portion of that day completely convinced that it wasn't out of the realm of possibility that I would be joining the Nanaimo Clippers. And what that would mean for that future as a Clipper. I was also like six years younger than all of them. But did you actually get to the point where you were like putting skates on or anything? No, we did. So at the end of the day, we played hockey and the kids that could rollerblade got put on rollerblades and that was not me. So I was just slowly running around the gym being terrible at hockey.

So you're on foot? I'm on foot, yeah, because I don't know how to skate on any level. Roller skate or ice skate, don't know how to do it. Terrible at it. So I'm just slowly running while everybody's skating by me, and I'm just bad. I'm bad at every level of the game.

But I'd spent a few hours that day convinced that I was going to be the next Nanaimo Clipper. And it was a dream that I never had prior to that or cared about the day after. I never played hockey. That's genuinely, I think, the last time I played hockey.

It just appeared. Can I ask a question? Of course. What track is that on the Nanaimo Clippers hockey story? What do you mean, what track? Oh, this is... On the album. Not on. It's you mean, what track? Oh, this is not on. It's not even on the list.

Oh, shit. This is like bonus. This is a B-side. Jeff, you have no idea how excited I was that we went so heavy on knobs in track one and that was not on the list. I'm confused as to why Jeff thought we weren't on track one yet.

Like, were you just... What were you doing in the last episode? Just like trying not to tell a story? No, no, no, no. I wasn't a part of andrew's album structure thing he presented this to me last night or yesterday and we were he wanted just talking about how see the way the way it went down is we knew you were going to be taken off at some point nobody knew how long i had had the conversation with you at dinner had an inkling. Eric came to us and said, hey, we need to schedule ahead. Gavin's going to be gone for a while. And we said, like, how much?

And he said, probably as much as we can get. And then Andrew came up with 10 episodes. And I got it in my head because he said, I think we can record 10 episodes in one week. And Eric identified the first week of February as a good time to do it. So in my head, those 10 episodes were their own thing. Today does not comprise, today is not the first week of February is a good time to do it. So in my head, those 10 episodes were their own thing. Today does not comprise... Today is not the first week of February. It is still January 20th or something. So I was considering that to be something that we're going to do 11 days from now. Right now, I just thought we were going to do our normal episode and then

bang out an extra one because we had the time and then we would be approaching the album of content on that week much like we did Hell Week when you left to go film Laser Team so many years ago in Achievement Hunter I just didn't think it had started yet I think it would be detrimental to do three in a day I agree I think it's detrimental to do two in a day sometimes

okay that's not true. That's not actually true. I don't think that. I don't know why I said that. That was like, I don't know. I actually fucking, I'm having more fun doing this episode than the last episode. I had a lot of fun doing the last episode. And I recorded an episode of Annual Pass 15 minutes before this.

So this is my third episode today, and I'm having a blast. Well, let me ask you, Jeff. How were the pleasantries before Annual Pass? Fucking awesome. Awesome. Yeah, dude, that's a whole different vibe there. It's me and Jack and Ben and it's just like a big dude bear hug. It is just nothing but pleasantries. It's a really easy way to roll into a podcast that's also very warm and positive. Very different from us. I think we can be both those things but rarely simultaneously yeah i agree i agree i think we have very very great moments of warmth is the donkey kong bit is that a part of the album yeah that was on track one that was track one okay okay so we're bouncing around all right

when are you gonna start that then i like it why think it's a great idea why don't we start I don't know when this airs whenever this airs one week from then okay one so it's gonna come out the next episode uh the results of it I guess would come out probably a year later

yeah when does this air what day is it right now for us well I'm waiting for Eric or Nick yeah I'm waiting for somebody to tell me yeah when does when does this air what day is it right now for us well I'm waiting for Eric or Nick yeah I'm waiting for somebody to tell this will be February 9th

February 9th okay what about the following episode 89 February 9th so not that weekend but the following weekend I will start it

Saturday 12 a.m. and I have until I have 40 hours from that point are you gonna be doing commentary are you gonna be yeah I'll do some I'll do point. Are you going to be doing commentary? Are you going to be?

Yeah, I'll do some. I'll do some commentary. You're going to stream the whole thing? All 30 hours? Yeah. We'll say I'll stream the whole thing. Maybe I won't do commentary necessarily for all of it, but I'll try to do for the most of it, the bulk of it. So I have a question.

A couple of years ago, you did a thing. This is pre-podcast. This is pre-content at all. You just did this to amuse yourself. You did a really fun, really clever, really cool thing that I was a big fan of, where for a solid month, you played, not Fortnite, but PUBG. You played Player Unknown's Battlegrounds. And you only ate real food in real life if you won the game. And when you win the game, it's called Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner. And so you were only allowed to eat chicken, but you could only eat chicken when you won a round of PUBG.

So if you played for 10 hours in a day and you didn't win a game, you didn't eat that day. Which I thought was brilliant and really fun to watch. And you actually ended the 30 days with a surplus of food. I would have stopped to death. Yeah, yeah, no kidding, right? How, on the worst day, on your toughest day in that, how long do you think you played and streamed? Because you streamed that entire thing too. I did.

Well, there were times where I would stream. Thank you. You just made me think of something else, Jeff. Unrelated that. But if I didn't stream, I'd screenshot the win. I think the most I probably played probably around eight hours.

I'd say once again, it's the most I'd put in a day. So less than half of what you're going to have to do here. I'd assume so. Yeah, that was a constant. Maybe it was longer.

I don't know. It's hard to tell with time between sleeping and whatnot. I would definitely stream for like four hours hours three hours a night I'd say and then on weekends. I'd probably play a little bit during the day without streaming are there donkey kong 64 speedruns I'm sure there are but those would involve using like cheats and skips that I would not yes

It's a pretty glitchy game. Okay, so you're playing it your goal is to play it legitimately. That's not how you're going to cheat. You'll find a different way to cheat. I'm not going to cheat. I didn't cheat the Halo bet. If anything, Gavit was more cheating the Halo bet, and then I had to copy his cheats. Not really cheat. You're using... What is cheating?

If me using skulls... Wait. Can I get the audio isolated of Andrew saying, I'm not going to cheat, followed up by, what is cheating? That'd be great. Thank you. You brought up a moment ago, Jeff, me streaming it and made me think of the fact, well, when I wasn't streaming,

I would screenshot my wins. I think Gavin may have, and I don't know this to be true but i think gavin may have pulled off the greatest troll move against me anyone ever has i think it's highly possible and if if you have i want to applaud you gavin is it it was a great it was a great move as part of as we discussed this album structure of ideas as last night I was like I need to think of more content whenever Gavin and I play Halo right

now he does a thing where we try to get more kills than each other and I typically will have more than he does but if there's a game where he has more kills than me he'll call out that he's doing that he is and that he screenshots the screen whenever we play this has gone on for weeks now and he'll say it he'll typically wait until he

won't bring attention to it until there's maybe like nine or ten kills left in a game and then he'll be like ah screenshot game and then it will become intense and i will try to win and i most of the time don't as of me disappointedly yelling we've had some close screenshot games where I've almost come back well because Andrew most we mostly just play very casually we're not playing ranked half the time we're just playing like fiesta or something very casual so we're just like shooting the shit half the game and if I notice towards the end that I'm doing better I'll mention it and then Andrew just goes basically silent as he tries to concentrate.

It becomes very competitive. And then I've had this joke where I'm going to buy Gavin a photo album. And when he has enough screenshots to fill the photo album, I'll be like a prize or something as a gag. So last night I decided I was like, well, I wonder we've been playing for quite a few weeks now. There've been plenty of screenshot games. How many screenshots has

Gavin taken and so I checked your thing and I there was not a single screenshot there and I had never considered the possibility that you just say screenshot without screenshot Gavin have you taken have you taken a single screenshot

during our screenshot game I took one. You took one? That's great. That's a fantastic troll move. I have been... The sweatiness of these games whenever Kevin would throw out a screenshot

game. I don't know how quickly you figured out that I wasn't taking them. I was going to do that for so long i well here's the thing you could have had an out and i'm glad i didn't set it up this way that information is private on your account i can't see it so i wasn't sure if you had flipped it to private prior to the screenshot thing and that's why they weren't there so there was room for you to to continue this no but i looked at it when i took was the one i sent you where i'd i guess i'd only half held down the back button or i'd let go too soon but it's like a very transparent version of the scoreboard like i messed up the screenshot it's funny because i think i've taken one screenshot

myself and i couldn't figure out how you did it because it was like it looked shitty like there's not a post game screen but i had never thought and then last it was like it looked shitty like there's not a post game screen but I had never thought and then last it was like the scene and the usual where the slowly dropping the coffee cup when he has the realization I was like I wonder how many screenshots oh no is this all a lie

yeah I just didn't want to clog up my feed clog up the feed nobody could see well i could have to scroll through it one day don't i i you know what i started today gavin feeling bad that jeff is fucking with you with you've always being in a bad mood i no longer feel bad jeff has this bad mood you have your screenshot he is in a bad mood sometimes though i only like sometimes he's not but sometimes he's it's pretty noticeable and you're like maybe just because i know him so well but it's like god damn dude what do you think people don't get a bad mood yeah but the ratio everyone has like a gammy day where they didn't sleep well it's comedy you know

but all comedy has a grain of truth in it, right? And the reality is that more often than not, you're in a gammy mood. We need to get you a new bed and a new door. I'm trying to make myself sleep better. I'm trying to lock people out. I'm trying to fingerprint the door handles and all that. I'm trying to make myself less tired. But I would say like 95 percent of the time i'm solid well i think everybody else might come up with a different ratio but it's cool that you think that

what about you andrew do you think i'm in a bad mood sometimes no only once there's only one time where it felt genuine i don't know that that no wasn't super believable there you went no we can't do that we're're going to take away the entire English language from Jeff if we start calling out every word. He's already lost. Oh, that's can also remove.

Honestly, if I feel like I'm genuinely in a bit of a flat mood, I just try and avoid people in general. Is that why I never talk to you? No, that tracks. That makes a lot of sense that's why you

we never communicate like if i'm feeling really tired and a bunch of people hanging out i i would much prefer not to go i just don't like being around people when i'm tired because i just feel like i'm not being very funny or i'm just being boring and it's just like i'm everyone's gonna be in in a better place if i'm if i'm just gonna go to sleep early or something yeah the way the world would be a much better place without you. I see what you're saying. Oh. Wait, Andrew, what was the one time I was in a bad mood?

I don't remember the context of it, but Jeff said it I think to fuck with you. It was like the third time he had done it, but it seemed genuine. And that's what made it funny. It is funny that he fucks with you and that you don't know how to react to it but when you're actually in a bad mood it makes it

way funnier the problem is the problem for you gavin is that i'm some sometimes i'm kidding sometimes that's all sometimes Sometimes I'm not. Sometimes you are legitimately, and I may be the old, maybe it's because we lived together for so long, and maybe I just know you that well, but sometimes I'm definitely not kidding, and I guess you'll just never know.

I feel like you're maybe attributing just generic tiredness to actually being in a bad mood like a lot of the time i am like a little bit lethargic i know tired lethargic gavin we made red versus blue together i remember those long days i know i know i've seen you fall so much you're so tired that's true so here's my idea for the infinity pie okay all right I just realized I never got to it and then yeah

I'm crowbarred into it okay so what we had the I had the idea or I think actually maybe you had the idea Andrew I don't want to steal it or somehow some of an idea was formed at some point in the past through some combination of this podcast just say the idea where we wanted to make the infinity towel right we wanted

to take all the little pieces of relics of NBA players and make a super towel that's got LeBron James and Kobe Bryant and Jason Tatum and Joel Embiid in it. Just say that'd be a funny visual. And just to be clear, not actual full team towel. We've asked people to send in towel cart just to be clear, they're towel carts.

It's just a little snippet of it. And by the way, people have been sending stuff stuff in i went and checked the mail yesterday or today and i had a bunch of uh baseball cards that people have sent in not baseball cards but like different kinds of wild trading cards so we'll try to open those up on a break show that already happened at this point uh so so if you watch that you saw the cards what they are. Anyway, I was thinking the other night, I was ordering pizza, and I had this problem in my house where I like Hawaiian pizza. I like a Hawaiian pie,

and I like a fiery Hawaiian pizza. But I don't like it an entire pizza worth. And my girlfriend and my daughter are not big fans. So I don't ever want to order a whole Hawaiian pie for myself because I generally just want one piece. And then they want to get like a margarita or a pepperoni or whatever. And then I thought about it. They should make a pizza called the infinity pie where it's at once without having to order too much pizza or just in my case, go without ever having a Hawaiian pizza because I would be left with six slices I wouldn't eat. An infinity pie. I think that would do so well if Pizza Hut or Domino's or one of

those chains created it. And it's like, here's your pepperoni slice. Here's your Hawaiian slice. Here's your veggie slice. Here's your gluten-free slice. Here's your meat extravaganza slice. Here's your double pep or whatever. You always end up with a pizza box with just one slice of anchovy left in it. Well, yeah. I mean, maybe. Or maybe people would be like, well, there's only one left. I'm going to learn to like anchovies

and then they... Oh. Little Caesars makes this. Little Caesars makes this. It's called the Quattro Pizza. Wow. It's called the... What is it called? It's called the Quattro Pizza. Wow. It's called the, what is it called? It's called a Quattro, I believe. Alright. I've never had it. I don't see a Hawaiian pizza on that. Can you pick? It's not in their four. No, I don't

know if you pick. It's a great question. Can you pick the four? Eric is saying that it was like the first episode of Face Jam. No, you don't pick the four. It's just four. Yeah, see, that's the problem. I would want to be able to pick. And four's not enough. I would want to, that's not infinity to me. That's quad. I don't, I don't, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on. Yeah, see, that's the problem. I would want to be able to pick. And four's not enough. I would want to, that's not infinity to me. That's quad. I don't, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on.

Yeah, infinity is eight. Four, four. Infinity is eight. You want a pizza where every single slice is different? I think so, yes. But it's still one pizza. No, I understand that it's what,

yeah, no, I get that. I'm saying that, but you want every single slice to be different. I think so. You want one slice, individual that seems well eric an eight tipped over is infinity yeah see like turn an eight sideways kick kick kick it kick an eight as if it's a small canadian kid and it becomes an infinity let's let's just very quickly. It was a crying infinity sign. Let's throw out a scenario. Jeff, you,

we're at your place. There's a group of people. Gavin's there. Bunch of people are there and you let it known to the party that you have ordered your infinity pizza. I am rushing to that fucking box. Like it's the beginning of the hunger games. If there's only one slice of each type,

I need, like, it's going to be fucking chaos. It's just going of the hunger games. If there's only one slice of each type, I need like, it's going to be fucking chaos. It's just going to be a sprint. It'll be like the XFL where they just put the ball in the middle of the field. Everybody ran to it for the kickoff. Everyone's going to be storming that pizza box. And if somebody has a storm chasing,

I will get there first. What you're saying is it's creating enthusiasm around the food. I like it. I know. No, it's you're creating false scarcity. So I'm going to have to fucking elbow two people I like to make sure I get pepperoni. You just imagine a big party full of shit loads of people. And then someone's like, I don't know what we're going to do.

We're going to get eight infinity pizzas. Yeah, that's eight slices for it. Oh, maybe we should have just got eight normal pizzas. Never describe scarcity as creating enthusiasm ever again, please. It's a terrible term. Creating enthusiasm. You get a slice of cheese, you get a slice of pep, you get a slice of mushroom

and pep, you get a slice of veg, you get a slice of wine. That's exciting if I'm the only one eating the pizza. How often are you having parties? How often are you partying? How many times? How often? Let me ask you a question.

On a scale of like, how many out of every 10 times you order a pizza, is it for a party or is it for you or you and like one other person? Because for me, it's 10 out of 10 times I'm getting a pizza for me, my girlfriend, and my daughter. Not the whole fucking world. Depends how much pizza I'm ordering.

I mean, I would assume the rules, anytime you're ordering in mass, the rules of ordering change. I also wouldn't ever order a tray of 100 nuggets for myself, but if I'm having people over, maybe I'll do that. What's the maximum capacity for the quad pizza or the infinity pizza in your mind eight no that's way too many people how many people i'm sorry how many slices how many

people yes uh i would say if i can do a pizza party i get one slice of pizza i'm fucking i would say four every everybody gets two everybody gets two slices two four slices? Four? No. No. That's, you need a, I, no. I'm not going to eat more than two pieces of pizza. Then I'm okay if you, I would say three. And if you're part of the three and you're only eating two, then I'm okay with it. Then three. But I'm okay with every, Eric said it's not the slices, it's the choices. I'm okay with every choice on the pie.

Well then, hmm. What are all the choices? I mean, let's see. Cheese. Pepperoni. Mush mushroom pep, veg, Hawaiian, deluxe, meat lovers, and margarita. It adds a little bit of variety because you're like, oh, what am I going to get? What's left in the box? What am I going to get? What's left in the box? What am I going to have? You don't actually know.

You know it's going to be something you like, but you don't know which one. I would say it enhances. I'm about to say it enhances that slice. Makes it taste even better. So you're going to keep a tomato base across the entire pizza? For this infinity pie, yeah. I'm assuming that there's other options.

What if I told you that one of the slices has the P word on it? You're creating the scenario in which every slice is something that you like. In a scenario in which you don't like every slice. I would say that... I would say, first off, that's ludicrous. How often have you seen a pizza with the P word on it?

But I would also say I just described probably the eight most common slices of pizza out there. I don't think I'm stretching or going for weird ingredients. I'm just going for like the pizzas that you mostly see out in the world in the wild. That's fair. I just don't as somebody as somebody who doesn't love every slice of pizza. I'm pretty I'm pretty cornered. so which which out of those eight that i said which one wouldn't you eat i i'm not a big fan of sausage on pizza don't like it i wouldn't touch an olive yeah all of if there's an olive on there i'm out sometimes oh no i can enjoy a red onion on a pizza i mainly stick within the camps of like, I'm either going to have a barbecue chicken pizza or like a pepperoni pizza. Those are my teammates.

See, I feel like barbecue chicken would be a bridge too far in my infinity pie. I think that's a little bit more of a niche slice of pizza, but I do enjoy a barbecue chicken pizza for sure. I like a Hawaiian, but I swap out the ham with pepperoni. pizza for sure i like a hawaiian but i i swap out the ham with pepperoni so if i could poach some of your pineapple from your hawaiian slice i still i think this is a terrible idea ultimate terrible idea terrible i would say terrible i'd go as far as saying terrible yeah

unless i'm ordering for myself and i can pick all the slices in which case i'm probably just doing a half and half yeah I guess I think it I think it would revolutionize pizza I think that little Caesars was on to something they just didn't take it far enough I think it would be you have me back on board if it's all the crust varieties

all the topping varieties all the sauce varieties and you don't know what you're buying and it's like the different brands and you don't know what you're buying. And it's like the different brands, like, you know how like Domino's their flat crust is like a fucking cracker each, like how they cut it.

Like if there's one, more of a Franken pizza, like you're describing what's called the infinite mystery pizza. I love that too. I'm in for that. That sounds great. But just one slice of everything they're all the same outside of just topping variety that's a tougher sell for me uh what about that bread clip right yeah what about that bread clip i wouldn't buy just pizza but i would buy

a glorious tiki mug that looked like a porta potty that came out a week ago if you go to our website to our store store.roosterteeth.com and then you look up in the section and you see a pink porta potty tiki mug and it's still for sale we have a problem please

please buy it please please for god's sakes is that would that be our second flop after the skateboard? They'll never, after the skateboard, they're never going to let us make anything again. If we fail on these. We should just maintain a page on the store called the F*** Face Flops

and just put everything in the shrine. Like, acknowledge there's a piece of shit. Flop face. Shift it that way. Oh, yeah. Flop face. Dude, speaking of fl flops one of the things I know we gotta

end the show I know we got Eric yelling at me we had a conversation the other night we were all playing video games together and I was asking you guys what your favorite candy or sweet was and then you guys gave me your answers and so I bought them and I meant to tell you guys to do the same thing. And then I thought we could all try each other's favorite candies on air and have like a little

candy taste test. But in the process of buying some, and I'm still waiting for Andrew's to show up, I discovered, you know, I don't know if you know, I'm a huge Laffy Taffy fan. I'm a big banana Laffy Taffy fan. And I was at the store buying some candy, some of this candy last night. And I saw that there's this thing called Laffy Taffy Candy Laugh Bites. And it's all banana. It's called Gone Bananas. And it's just like, I don't know, it's like a different kind of candy, but it's Laffy Taffy brand.

And so I got the idea that it was like, basically, if you're one of those people who loves banana runts like I do, you just want banana runts. And if you can just buy a banana runts, you do. So I bought this thinking that I was going to get some fucking, just a bunch of yummy ass banana Laffy Taffy. This sucks. This was such a misstep for the Laffy Taffy brand. It is so unfun to eat and it's so bland.

I can't believe they have, they have yellow banana gold in their grasp, and they turned it into this. I'm just so disappointed. That's all. I just had to register my frustration. So what is it called, sorry? Laffy Taffy Candy Laugh Bites Gone Bananas. Okay.

I will see if I can find it, because I don't... I'd be disappointed. But I don't like base Laffy Taffy, so maybe this will be... Maybe I'll enjoy this't like base Laffy Taffy so maybe this will be maybe I'll enjoy this more base Laffy Taffy is good so we're doing the candy

thing next time I think we should do you guys know what your favorite kid do you know what candies to buy yeah no well yeah well I don't know mine mine is is mini Starbust but only

the fave red version mini Starburst fave reds I don't want the regular mini starburst because it has the orange and the yellow they taste like dog shit you don't want that but fave reds you just get the red and the pink starburst yeah okay and then also chewy nerds Andrew I believe yours

was sour chewy nerds sour chewy nerds which I had to buy online and they haven't arrived yet they don't I can't get them locally. And then, Gavin, you said Kinder Bueno. I have one of those as well. Yeah. A little treat.

So if you... Okay, but Gavin, imagine a Kinder Bueno, but one part of it was a Kit Kat, and the next part of it was an arrow, and it ended as, I don't know, a Reese's Pieces cup. How would you feel about that? I'd give it a go. Yeah? That actually sounds really good.

The Infinity Chocolate. I just had a genius idea. What if we call it the Infinity Chocolate? It's just like an eight, but knocked over. That could be our brand. That's what it says on the wrapper. Infinity Chocolate. One in 10,000 bars says a bread clip.

One in 10,000 bars says a bread clip. Should we stop the podcast? Yeah, we should stop the show. Yes, yes. I was waiting for somebody to end it. What do you mean? It's been over.

Someone flop us an outro. All right, you got it, guys. Hey, thank you so much for listening. This is episode number 89. Next episode, episode 90, a revolutionary episode in face history where everyone eats candy thank you so much

for listening buy a tiki mug store.roosterteeth.com and we'll see you next time on face not an official ending but I'll allow it hey guys minor league fan Jack here with a look at next week's episode of face Jeff wants to sell knives Gavin and Andrew have an interesting conversation

Panton is a David Hasselhoff guy. Jeff gets a candy gift. How many train movies are there? What creature poops nerds? And once again, Andrew does not eat the pencil. All that and more on next week's episode of F*** This. We'll see you next time.