Regulation Podcast - Xmas Movie Draft

Episode Date: December 9, 2023

Just hear the sleigh bells jingling as ANEGG get together for a new draft, this time picking the greatest Xmas movies of all time. Is the number 1 pick TRULY number 1? What would your draft board look like? You watching these? Don't bother putting the cookies out for Santa because F**kface is bringing the goods this year. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

let it be known audience please put this in the video i told you something was just do it something was just born off camera that i hope continues for the rest of the future of this podcast you're welcome the sound of that i think you did like the sound of it that's why you're here hello and welcome to a christmas smorgasbord movie draft special you know when we do our drafts like we did did the, man, somebody asked me, I was hanging out with Antonio and Bernie last night playing trucks, and they asked me, I was talking about having to do the draft today, and they said,

explain what it is, and I went, okay, well, it's like we've done these other drafts, we've done, and I realized I couldn't remember a single draft except for the mall draft. How many other ones have we done? Five or six, maybe? Yeah, rock, not rock. Rocks! That was one. What are some of the other ones have we done? Five or six, maybe? We did The Rock, not Rock. Rocks! That was one.

What are some of the other ones? We did a mall draft. We did the mall. Movies. Yeah. Summer 98. Yeah, the Summer 98 movies. States.

Ads. TV ads. Yeah, Falls. That was our first one. Oh, the Falls draft. God, I couldn't remember any of those. Clearly left a big impression on me. Speaking of big impressions, though, that was our first one oh the falls draft god i couldn't remember any of those yeah clearly left a big impression on me uh speaking of big impressions though uh today we're going to

be drafting our favorite or is it our favorite christmas movies or do we think like the most iconic christmas movies how do we phrase it the best christmas movies in our opinion okay that's that that that tracks with what with what i selected so that works i think it's sort of up to you to decide like do you want to try to win this and like go for what you think are more popular picks or do you want to be more true to yourself and what's in your i'm in it to win top four okay i'm excited luckily for me both things are true at the same time oh oh look at je, man of the people. Mr. Culture, personal interests perfectly connect with also popular interests. Crazy.

So we're going to do we're going to determine draft order. I have a little bit of a spin, a little twist to this draft process. The picking order that is going to run by you guys. Blindside. No, not a blindside. I've talked to most. I think I've talked to everyone about this except maybe gavin oh so we're gonna do the randomizer right now which is what eric pulled up we're gonna randomize the names and then whoever is at the top when we randomize it

however many times they're first typically instead of that being the first pick they get to pick where they want to draft so let's say i'm at the top i can say i want to pick third and then it goes to the second person and then they pick where they want to draft and we just go down the line that would necessarily complicate no because there's a strategic edge to this no i think in my opinion there is a top two in this draft, but in the music draft, I'd want to be five. How about this? I'd like, how about this?

So I like where you're going with it. I'd like to add one more twist to it. Okay. When you get picked, you get to pick what order you draft in, right? Yes. That's what you're saying. Like if I roll, I get first, I can say, like, Gavin goes first, I get the second, and I can pick second, third, or fourth. What if instead of choosing where I get first, I can say, Gavin goes first, I get the second, I can pick second, third, or fourth.

What if instead of choosing where I go, can I pick where, can I move Gavin? Sure. Why not? What? So like instead of me getting to pick my place in the draft, I can use that pick to move somebody else's place. But you still, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Because you still have to be on the board. This is why, this is why none of this works. No, you can't. I want to add that if you go fourth at the end of the draft, you can take someone's entire picks. Okay. Okay. What?

I like that. Why don't we do the last pick either has to live with what they have or they can take any pick. What? And everyone slides down from that point. A white elephant draft? Oh, I was just kidding, because it's stupid. If it helps, audience, I'm

against this. So, I'm with you guys. Let's just do my idea, and then we'll how about we evolve? Let's just start basic. Let's just do Andrew's idea. And then we'll go from there. So let's, how many randomizers are we going to do? Uh, what's a Christmassy number? Twelve. For the twelve days of Christmas.

Okay. Oh, what's advanced mode i don't know switch to advanced mode are we ready are we ready for advanced oh no that looks wait no no that's way too much we don't that's way too advanced we could use no look we could use pre-randomization generated from a specific date, like Christmas Day. But I have to randomize this 12 times. Yeah, but randomize it from Christmas. Guys, if you were expecting a draft and you're about six minutes into this, really sorry we haven't gotten to it yet. We're almost there. I'm going to go back to simple mode.

Yeah. Oh, man. I'm going to randomize 12 times. There's one. Hey. He was excited. We said we're going to do it 12 times. He was excited on one. I'm going to cheer every time I'm at the top.

Four. Hey. Five. Oh. Six. Hey. Hey. Eight.

Nine. Ten. Eleven. And here is 12. Hey. Okay, Gavin. Which spot do you want to go in here?

What are you going to pick? Well, first, obviously. It would be stupid to go anything other than first. A hundred percent. I completely agree with you. I mean, Gavin, you're absolutely right. See, I think there's a top two and i wouldn't want first

i'd want second so andrew do does andrew now pick his place i believe so i want second wow okay this this is about to turn into the biggest waste of time. We're dropping ourselves for the draft. Hey, hey, guys, I'm third. I'm going to go ahead and pick three. See, I think that's a mistake. If I was third, I would go five. And here we go, Nick, you're fourth.

Oh, take a big guess. I would go five. Nick, where do you want to be? I want to be four. Oh, that's fantastic. I mean, Eric and Nick are both fools you want to be? I want to be four. Oh, that's fantastic. I mean, Eric and Nick are both fools. Unfortunately. So now hold on a second. Hold on.

Don't put my name down there yet. I get to pick. You told me that with my pick, I can pick what place I want. No, no, no, no, no. We're not doing that. We're not doing that. We're not doing your unnecessarily complicated thing. We're starting with the base idea.

No, you said I can pick where I want. I want to go first. No, you didn't hear correctly. You can go back and listen later. We went back to the original idea. Yeah, rewind this about five minutes where we're still trying to figure out the rules for some reason of the draft order.

But Nick is fourth, though, so he can pick anyone's full team. Right, Nick is fourth, so he can pick any full team. A draft draft. And everyone else has to compete in a sack race to see who goes next. Are you feel good about this, Andrew?

I'm happy because I, in my head, top two and then there's a big drop off and I'd be, I would go five so I could get the five six. I want the turn. Now, once during the draft, we're allowed to use our pick to cancel out someone else's pick, right?

So then neither of us get a pick for that round? I'm enacting that. I don't want Andrew to pick in round one. I'm using that rule. That's too bad. We can figure this out later. You can't just add rules like that in the middle of the draft. You just did it this fucking draft! No, I didn't. I did it before we started. I don't want

him to pick in round two. Before, not during. You didn't even tell Gavin about it until right now. So it couldn't have been official. Eric I don't want him to pick in round two. Not during. You didn't even tell Gavin about it until right now. So it couldn't have been official. Eric, do you want Andrew to pick in round three? I want everyone to pick in all of the rounds. I want to do the draft. I don't understand. The idea of reinventing the draft is so insane.

Well, he just made us draft ourselves for some reason. I know. No, you'll see. draft ourselves for some reason. I know. No, you'll see. And look at what happens. We randomized 12 times. Gavin, Andrew, Eric, Nick, Jeff. And our picking order after choosing where we go is Gavin, Andrew, Eric, Nick, Jeff.

It's not my fault that three and four were dumb moves by you guys. It's not on me. No. You'll see. Just trust me. This will work out. Gavin. Maybe not this draft, but this will come into play. Maybe not this draft.

Maybe not this draft. Well, because you guys don't have the vision that I have with this, so you all fell in the line. I picked Die Hard. Oh, Christ. Gavin picks Die Hard. Oh, Gavin picks Die Hard. What a lame first pick.

Dude, listen. Don't be talking shit about that movie. It's a good movie. I'm not. I'm sick. I'm fatigued of arguing about whether Die Hard is a Christmas movie. I don't care. There's no argument.

It's a Christmas movie. Sure. Andrew was saying before we started recording, he was talking about how he's exhausted by the conversations about it. And I kept saying, we should probably save that for this recording because I don't think any of us are going to argue

that it's not a Christmas movie. No, I'm not going to argue. It's not. I'm just, I'm more, I hate the people that argue. Here's the thing with Die Hard. There are Christmas movies that I want to watch multiple times,

maybe once every couple of Christmases. I'll watch Die Hard any time of the year and that's why it's a great christmas movie i feel like you could argue that's why it's not a great christmas movie equally that's weird it's a christmas movie so good it stands tall and proud in june it can be two things at once jeff it sounds like andrew is arguing that it's not a christmas movie i'm not i'm getting a hint of an argument. I'm not. No. You just presented a counter-argument to Gavin.

That's step one in arguing. I presented a counter-argument that it's the number one Christmas movie of all time, not that it is a Christmas movie or not. I'm just saying that if it plays so well out of season, maybe it's not the greatest Christmas movie of all time, but a good Christmas movie. Well, according to our draft that we all agreed upon, it is now officially

the greatest Christmas movie of all time. They're draft busts all the time, Jeff. Round one, pick one. Round one, pick one does not mean that that is going to be the best player in the draft. and dude you can't call a proven success it's not greg odin we're not we don't have to wait and see if his knees are gonna hold up it's goddamn lebron james he's got 21 years of mvp stats behind him i know but

i'm arguing more the lebron james versus michael jordan argument where they're both great but it's an opinion of whose greatness is better i'm saying I think there's other greatness that's ahead of Die Hard, in my opinion. Well, you're certainly in a position to tell us what the second best Christmas movie of all time is. See, this is the problem. I would have taken third if I knew that Gavin was going to go with Die Hard. Well, how would you? That is the only movie I thought Gavin would pick. I've made some projections, by the way. Based on how much time has been spent

on the first pick and how many we have remaining, this will be a 176 minute recording. Oh, God! It's going to take so long to edit! It's almost as long as the Titanic. No, this is going to be easy. Just chop off the head and the tail and export. It's fine. So with my

dogshit first pick, Andrew now wishes he was third pick. No! Not dogshit first pick, Andrew now wishes he was third pick. No, not dog shit. Yeah, I don't understand why. He said that third and fourth were bad picks. And then he said that Gavin's number one pick was so bad it makes his number two pick bad. How does that make sense?

No, no, let me explain. So I have a draft board right now, and Die Hard is 20 on my list of 20 for my draft board. In my head, there is a clear top two, and I assume that anyone who went first would take one of those two, but they're both still on the board. So I should have went to three. I thought I needed to be in top two to make sure I got one of these,

but that was not the case. Crack rock. What it sounds like to me is Gavin's scout saw something different in training camp than you did. Yes. Yes, it is. I did. I have to decide.

Oh, this is tough. I didn't even. Oh, 220 minutes. It wasn't 100. Oh, man. These are. I'm really struggling with this first pick. Only 15 picks to go.

Oh, shit. That's not even right. Yeah, that's what I did wrong. I didn, that's not even right. Pix to go. Yeah, that's what the maths I did wrong. I didn't realize I'm at 20. I times it by 16. I did the same thing. I'm going to go with, and this is tough,

because I think there's another top pick. I'm going to go with Christmas Vacation. It's an iconic Christmas movie. It is the first, I think it's maybe the first time I like cried laughing at any piece of content as a kid the scene where he's putting up Christmas lights and he falls off

the gutter and then he launches the gutter through the neighbor's window the ice I could not I died I have a clear memory of me sitting in bed watching that movie for the first time, crying, laughing,

to the point where I rewound it and rewatched it like eight times in a row and then watched it frame by frame still laughing because I just learned how to do that, which has maybe influenced why I thought Gav would pick it. One of my first experiences trying to make anything slow motion. All-time movie. I think we talked about it before as well, but I think one of the best shots trying to make anything slow motion all time movie I think we talked about it before as well but I think one of the best shots

ever filmed in any movie is his feet coming through the ceiling and landing oh it's so good the scene where he fucking goes down the hill with the green stuff oh it's so good I gotta say having seen that movie one zillion times I love it there's so many classic moments

in it but it doesn't it feel 15 minutes too long to you? I agree with that. Yes. Even though it's an old timer. It just really slows down when he gets nostalgic in the attic. It recovers with the feet falling through. But God damn, dude.

If you could cut 20 minutes out of that movie, it would be amazing. I think it's probably the best use of the word fuck and still being able to be like a PG movie where he says that they're going to be like, it's going to be the happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap danced with Danny fucking K is so funny to me in like that little,

like he's just so fed up. That moment is so funny. I still to this day in my like, I don't know, like, average parlance, I still say shit and rocks constantly. Like, it's never left my vocabulary. We don't say that here. When he's dumping the septic tank and he just goes, Shitter's full with the cigarette.

It's so, fuck, it's so funny. That is great. It's on my list, but it's pretty far down my list because with my pick i'm going with love actually which is one of my favorite movies are you not just christmas movie but like one of my favorite movies of all time i love love actually really such a great movie what do do you love about it? I think it's a great movie of so many different characters and so many different pieces that all come together that feel so Christmas to me. That it's really fun. I feel it in my fingers. I feel it in my toes. I just think it's a really great.

I love Love Actually. I think it's a great movie. I think it's one of my favorite things about doing this draft is I would have never guessed great, I love Love Actually. I think it's a great movie. I think it's, one of my favorite things about doing this draft is I would have never guessed that Eric really liked Love Actually. That feels so out of character. I just think it's such a fun movie.

I love it. I wouldn't have thought that the best, his favorite thing about Love Actually is a wet, wet, wet song. I think that there are so many like fun performances and so much goofy shit.

Like the guys who are like so British and then they're going to go to America and America's going to be like this magic land. It's so fucking funny. That's how we think of it. It's so funny. I will say, I talked to TPG yesterday. His number one, Die Hard. He said he used to be a Love Actually guy, disavowed now, doesn't like the movie, rejectss it thinks it doesn't hold up at all i mean it's just scenes i and i and i love all the scenes like what i remember most about it and what i like

most about it is watching it going oh i love this part and then the next part comes i go oh i love this part because it's just jumping around in a way that i really enjoy all right i don't like it in a lot of movies i I like it in that movie. Good pick. Thank you. Nick? I feel like I agree with you on that one because that's the one I like that jumps from person to person with so many characters.

So tough call, but I think I'm going to go with a classic from childhood, but everybody loves it. It's fun for the whole family. Home Alone, right? Kevin McCallister stuck home alone defending his homestead against the wet bandits, eventually the sticky bandits from the second movie. It's just one of those fun movies. It feels like Christmas even though it's like – it doesn't have like that Christmassy like tinge like, oh, here, we're focusing on Santa, that kind of thing, right? We're focusing on the time that it's happening around it and it's just such a blast i love it and it still holds up to me even

though as a parent now i'm like how how how how how how the counting system does not work counting system doesn't work and also uh thank god for cell phones now right so my pick home alone that was my number two. That was in my top two. I think Christmas Vacation and Home Alone are, without a doubt, the one-two. Well, Jeff, as a snake draft, uh, you get two picks. Uh, oh, right, right. This is, I'm in fifth place and first place.

Uh, so we're not gonna, okay, okay, sounds good. Uh, alright, well, you know, obviously every christmas movie in existence to choose from there's a lot of different directions you could go i initially thought maybe i'd go like really old school and go like it's a wonderful life or miracle on 34th street or maybe something from my childhood like a christmas story but i decided to go with my heart and where i am as an adult right now at 48 years old and what i enjoy and so so I'm going with a newer movie. I don't know if you guys are familiar with it or not. I hope you are. Written by the country superstar Blake Shelton's mom.

He actually wrote a song about it. This is a little movie, a little Hallmark movie called Time for You to Come Home for christmas from 2019 uh i'm sure you remember it's about katherine she returns home after her husband dies and then she meets a veteran and he's on kind of a holiday journey himself and then as christmas nears they uh they form a bond and uh maybe find a miracle have you ever heard of this movie gavin no no i've never heard okay oh you should check you should definitely check it out. It's apparently the fifth best Christmas movie of all time. I think I might know what the sixth pick might be as well.

Oh, right. Is it time for me to go next? Yeah. Oh, absolutely. Right. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Whatever you're ready.

Round two. So way back in round one, I feel like I zagged. I think I maybe caught you guys off guard by throwing out a movie that you guys hadn't seen before. You guys don't know this, but I'm a big Hallmark Christmas movie fan. My wife does not like that about me. She wants to watch Christmas Vacation. And I've seen all those movies one billion times. So I want to see new stuff that I haven't seen

before, which is how I came across Time for You to Come Home for Christmas, the 2019 classic that was written by Blake Shelton's mom. I think I mentioned that way back in round one. You did. So for round two, I'm going to continue to follow my heart. I'm going to go with the 2020 Hallmark classic, Time for Us

to Come Home for Christmas. So he's just gonna go. What I appreciate about Jeff is that he wants to watch new things. So he watches the same movie with a different title over and over again which is what the Hallmark movies are.

No, no. It's not the same movie. It's a spiritual successor. And if I'm not wrong, I believe it's based on a different Blake Shelton song. And if I'm not wrong, I believe it's based on a different Blake Shelton song. And, and this one has some fucking heavy hitters in it. It's got a, I'm sure everybody remembers Lacey Schabert from party of five.

She's in it. Lacey should bear. Yeah, there you go. Steven Hussar, the original Meg. That's right there. Yeah,

there you go. So, uh, you know, it's a, it's a very different story. Yeah, there you go. So, you know, it's a very different story. It's about five guests that... Is it? Yo, five guests get mysteriously invited to an inn to celebrate Christmas.

With the help of the owner, Ben, Sarah discovers that an event from the past connects them and changes all their lives forever, dude. Forever? Forever. That's totally different from the previous movie, which was about a widow meeting a soldier, and then they form a bond. You could do it nine times

in a row. I think I will laugh every time someone says, everyone remembers, and then they say the name wrong. That's the funniest thing. That was great. Much like your pics, Jeff. Great pics. Who's that? Gavin, you're next.

No, it's Nick. Oh, hello. This is a tough call because I feel like there's a couple I could go with that you may not pick, so I'm going to take a risk and I'm going to move this one up in my draft pick. The Muppet

Christmas Carol, one of my favorite kids movies. And it's still so good. I just watched it in my sunsock for the first time. It's such a fun movie. You've got Gonzo, who's playing an omniscient, like Charles Dickens character in it, and Rizzo's just along for the ride, getting in trouble

and, you know, having a bad time. All the little rats working for Scrooge, and Michael Caine is Scrooge? It's so good. My name is Appadiza. Michael Caine is Scrooge. It's so good. My name is Appadiza.

Please spare me. God damn it, Nick. You got my two and three. Oh, no. I guess four wasn't so bad. No, that was. Yeah, get him, Nick. Get him. I could not have predicted a double hallmark on the end

and a fucking die hard and love actually in the first round. Well, then let me get to something a little more conventional. I like that Andrew starts all these drafts with like a mental plan for how it should go. With four other people and is then surprised every time when it's like, whoa, that's not what I would have picked. No, this is what I've learned. I have assumed every time that we all have the same board. And I now going into the next draft, I will think about what picks you all will make. I just I really appreciate that you think we all have a board.

Yeah, I do. You don't have a list of 20. No, 20. Oh, just in case. I have like seven picked, I think. Yeah, I got like six. I got one for every Oh, just in case. I have like 7 picked, I think. Yeah, I got like 6. I got 1 for every scenario, just in case. I already lost 1. Yeah, there you go.

No, I lost 2, actually. I've lost 2. Okay, well, let's see how this one does from 1965. I'm gonna go with a Charlie Brown Christmas. Oh, good pick! Great pick. Knew you were going to pick that. Of course.

Of course. I love it. It is short, but I think for kids, that's great. I really appreciate the message. Charlie Brown with like the little tree and he's going to do this thing and Snoopy's doghouse and they take all the stuff down. I also appreciate for some reason, it's a very Christ heavy message in the Peanuts gang. Very, very Christ-heavy. And you're not expecting it, and it always makes me laugh.

But it's fun. Snoopy plays a big guitar and dances around, so it's really kind of got something for everyone. Charlie Brown Christmas is very high on my list. One of the all-time great bad Christmas trees. Oh, yeah. Oh, trees. Oh, yeah. Oh, absolutely. Oh, yeah.

I mean, it's like the bad Christmas tree that all bad Christmas trees are based on now, right? Mm-hmm. And Judge-Fi. Yep. So next up is Andrew. Well, there's... Oh, man, this is tough.

So I have some personal picks. I'm trying to decide between my six and my seven right now. I think something else would fall to me. I'm going to go with, and it's not the original, Home Alone 2. Great movie. Oh, damn it. Fantastic film.

The perfect sequel. It's a perfect sequel. I missed out on the first one, but I at least get the second one. I get some Home Alone in my catalog. Great movie. Continuation. I mean, who would have ever thought a sequel would exist Nick talking about as a parent

it being crazy the first time it happens imagine it happened to twice who could have guessed who could have guessed he's lost in New York and that in the first one there was a scary old man who they thought was a murderer who helped him and then in the second one there's a scary old bird lady who they think is

eating birds or whatever who helps him. I thought you were going to make a Trump joke but you zagged it. Oh I forgot about that. How do you forget about that? It's the only thing that I think of when I think of this movie now. Really? Oh I think about Tim Curry. Trump is in that movie talking about the president. He is!

Well an old president but still. The president of the united states remember the talk boy i had one of those oh me too yeah i was gonna say that's like the number one toy of that year that's why i forgot about trump i tied one of those every time i watch the homologues i think uncle frank is just the biggest bastard and every time you watch it he's just so much worse he fucking sucks who is the character that plays Uncle Frank you look that up oh I asked Nick

did the talk boy you think influence your wanting to be an audio guy after that performance your interest in sound Kevin McAllister damn you no yeah maybe it could have been that's how I got here Nick just practices booking rooms

At the Plaza Hotel Hello sir Here's my credit card It's the perfect sequel because Once you get over the Stupid coincidence of them all being back in the same movie It's just The characters have the perfect amount being back in the same movie it's just the characters have the

perfect amount of memory of the first movie i think like duck in the the pot the uh paint tins and then getting rammed in the face like it's just so good so well done the hits are there's no there's no better moment in the history of film i think than when the crowbar scene, right? When he's swinging at the spider and he hits him in the chest with a crowbar. Like that single moment in Home Alone 1 is like maybe the strongest piece of cinema we have. But on a whole, I feel like all of the hits in 2

are better and elevated, if that makes sense. Aside from that one smack, all the stuff Kevin does to them in 2 is even better than the shit they do in 1, which is hard to accomplish. And the way that the giant tool chest rolls down the stairs without tipping over, it's just so stupid

and funny to me. That was the sound of a giant tool chest rolling down the stairs. Gavin, because you're number one, you get the next two picks as we sneak draft this thing. Well, to me, nothing says Christmas like Sinbad. Fuck! Jingle all the way, baby!

Oh, yes! Jingle all the goddamn way! That is such a good film. It is! I was hoping it would fall to me. Such a good film. It's so weird. It it would fall to me. Such a good film. It's so weird. Been a while since I've seen that one. It's so weird when it gets near the end

and they're in a big parade. Yeah, and for some reason the suit is like a half a billion dollar tech suit for no reason. Yeah, I don't like it could actually fly. Very weird. actually fly very weird very very weird um that's where that movie like really falls off for me where i just go i only remember the parts from the big

parade and not the rest of the movie and that's unfortunate because the rest of the movie is way better than the big parade yeah and it's a classic story of like shitball father gets redemption through just a bunch of luck and it doesn't really load anything. Shitball father. There's a bomb in that movie. There's like a legitimate postal

bomb. There's a drunk reindeer. Arnold Schwarzenegger fights a bunch of mall Santas it's fucking crazy and as a kid having the turbo man toy made it even better you had a turbo man? I had a real turbo man I wish I still had it

they made a bunch of them for the movie I had one it was great Jake Lloyd was a legend as a kid between Phantom Menace and that yeah it is him. He had an insane two movie run where if you were a kid around my age, Jake Lloyd was the fucking man. Two movie run.

Oh, they're huge movies. Jingle All the Way and The Phantom Menace. Fucking massive. I wonder what the best two movie and then only two movie run is. Jake Lloyd. It might be. There was that lloyd it might be there was that kid from jerry mcguire what was that kid's name you remember him jonathan lipnicki jonathan he was in that and then he was in a movie called the littlest vampire and then you never saw him again oh no don't disrespect like mike in that way oh i've never seen that's right i've never seen it like

mike well no he's not like mike. He's like Mike's friend. He goes, wow, that guy's like Mike. Oh, well, there you go. Wow. Yep. Wherever you're going, you better believe American Express will be right there with you. Heading for adventure? We'll help you breeze through security.

Meeting friends a world away? You can use your travel credit. We'll be right back. Well, Gavin, Jingle All The Way, I think, was an overwhelmingly positive pick. But you get another one. That's true. And this one is for all of the British millennials who I assume had this on VHS. It was a little TV movie, short, animated, called The Snowman. Frosty the Snowman? Nope. Just The Snowman.

The Snowman? Just The Snowman. Isn't that a Michael Fassbender movie? Hello, Mr. Policeman. Wasn't he about a serial killer? Yeah, isn't this a serial killer movie where they literally ran out of money and they couldn't yeah they would hide the bodies in the snowman oh it's this fucking thing oh have you seen that eric have you seen the snowman i i haven't seen i just know is it like a book oh yeah uh i think it was also a book and the the kids like flying

around the countryside of england singing i'm walking in the air and all that. I hate the way it looks so much. It's so soft. It's got an animation style that if you haven't slept well, will give you a real freaking headache. Oh my God. It hurts. No.

I don't like it. But obviously an absolute pillar of my childhood and many of my, well, generation. Yeah, I had this book as a kid. I didn't know there was a short. That's cool. I think it has David Bowie in it. What?

Nice. It does. There was also another short in the same animation style about Santa and he sang a song called Another Blooming Christmas and I used to think that was so funny when I was about like another short in the same animation style about santa and um he sang a song called another blooming christmas and i used to think that was so funny when i was about four that he called it that he was saying blooming uh because it sounded like a swear but it wasn't would you would you say

this was like a like always on at christmas a big classic everybody knew it kind of like charlie brown but for england okay cool big time interesting oh good pick that's a that's a Everybody knew it. Kind of like Charlie Brown. Yeah. But for England. Okay, cool. Big time. Interesting. Oh, good pick. That's a uniquely you pick. That's pretty good. Yeah. It's so funny if you Google the snowman, the images are Michael Fassbender

in a like looking down a thing of blood covered snow with a gun in his hand. And also just like the most family friendly snowman. It's a mix between both. It's great. Andrew, you get the next pick. And also just like the most family friendly snowman. It's a mix between both. It's great. Um, Andrew, you get the next pick.

Uh, man. Okay. So this, this is a complicated pick because I think in a vacuum of itself, it's fantastic. It's a really great Christmas movie, but it was overplayed and it has hurt it a lot

I feel like most people sick of it now largely due to the fact that TBS had nothing else to do I'm going with a Christmas story I think it's like so overplayed but that is not the fault of the film

if you remove it from that context there's so many things that I think are so funny about it. Discovering it as a kid. I thought it was hilarious. I still laugh at Fragile must be Italian. Honey, it's just fragile when he's like trying to open the box that he won. I think that's such a great dumb gag. So many iconic images.

It's almost like it is so perfect for the season that it is hurt it because like TBS used to do those 24 hour marathons. But I think it's an all time great Christmas movie just overplayed. But that's not its fault. No, I get that. I think that's a good. I think that's strong because I agree. I wouldn't put it on my list for all the reasons you listed. Yep. Totally. Why it's not the film's fault. I agree. It's not the film's fault. I agree it's not the film's fault. I just wouldn't put it on my list because of those reasons. Unfortunately.

But I think it's a good pick. My pick, I think this is unconventional, but I do watch it around Christmas time and it is a Christmas movie because it's written by Shane Black, is Lethal Weapon, which is a movie that opens with Jingle Bell Rock, I think.

Oh, yeah. And as she's like really high and then falls off the balcony. I was about to say, it opens with her taking a gainer off the top of a hotel. Yeah, and the song that's playing in the background, I think. Maybe it's rocking around the Christmas tree. It's one of the two. And Christmas is the background theme and I think sort of the theme of Mel Gibson's character, like part of it. And also I found out when I was making my list that the house that Danny Glover lives in in that movie is the same house that like the yuppie couple like Julia Louis-Dreyfus from Christmas Vacation lives in.

Oh, wow. Oh, really? That's wild. It is the same house. The house that takes the ice? Yeah. How are you going to fit that tree in there? Bend over and I'll show you. Oh, really? That's wild. It is the same house. The house that takes the ice? Yeah. How are you going to fit that tree in there?

Bend over and I'll show you. Like that part? Like that house? That house is the same house that Danny Glover lives in. Dude, and Gary Busey, a pre-motorcycle accident. Gary Busey is very, very scary in that movie. Awesome. Mr. Joshua, right? Yep, yep.

God, I love it. I love it. It's so good. So Lethal Weapon's my pick. If you haven't watched it during Christmas, give it a shot. It's more Christmassy than you remember. Also, like, watch any of Shane Black's movies

during Christmas. They all are... I was curious which Shane Black would make this list. Yeah, there's more Shane Black that I could have put on this list, but I decided to keep it to one. Because there's a lot. There's a lot.

There's a lot. But Nick, you're next. Funny you should mention Shane Black. I had this, and this is the one I actually dropped because I love this movie, but I didn't think anyone would pick it in that round. So I'm going with Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. Yes, that was on my list.

Shane Black movie, I love it. Robert Downey Bang. Yes, that was on my list. Shane Black movie. I love it. Robert Downey Jr. is incredible. Val Kilmer is hilarious. And then it's kind of a murder mystery movie. Michelle Monahan's in it too. Is it a comedy?

Yeah, dark comedy. Definite comedy. Sort of like a, it's trying to be like a little noir-y, but it is, it's funny and it is Christmas and it is, it's very Shane Black. I think if you liked any of his other stuff, you'd enjoy it.

Yeah, Robert Downey Jr. plays like a thief who kind of, he wanders into like a test, like an audition for a role and he is pretending to hide in there. And they like his performance so much that he's getting hired for a role and he is pretending to hide in there and they like his performance so much that he's getting hired for the role and he's sent out to hollywood essentially to learn under val kilmer's private eye who's like this super serious dude who thinks he's an idiot and just treats him like shit the whole movie it's very very good yeah he plays a petty thief who is trying to steal a knockoff robocop for Christmas, and he runs into an audition to hide, and the thing he's reading for is exactly the scenario that just happened

that got his friend shot, so he gives a really convincing performance, and they think he's an amazing actor when really it's just his life has just happened, and he's reacting like a human would to that scenario. It's great. Very quotable. A lot of funny lines in it.

What would, the thing I always remember from that movie is Val Kilmer saying to Robert Downey Jr., do you know what would happen if I looked up idiot in the dictionary? And then Robert Downey Jr. saying, you'd see a picture of me. And then he says, no, I'd see the definition of an idiot, which you fucking are. And then he hits him in the head with a box. It's a great movie. Excellent movie. It's good great movie. Excellent movie. It's good stuff, but Jeff,

it's your pick now. You actually get two. You get your last two picks in a row. Oh, that's exciting. I wonder what's going to happen. Is that by any chance a time for them to come home? Well, Gavin, don't spoil it. Gavin, come on. Time for me

to come home. Honey, I shrunk the Christmas. When I approached this, I wanted to... I like a traditional Christmas story. I think the first one in the series that I talked about earlier, the Blake Shelton one, was definitely a traditional Christmas story. The next one was kind of a mystery, which I like. This one is even a little bit more off the beaten path.

This is about a woman who gets pulled from a car in the ice. Like she goes off the road and she's rescued from the icy waters and comes out with amnesia. And then she catches, essentially gets a ride with a handsome nurse to try to figure out who she is and find out the clues to her identity while also bringing some positivity and light and joy to the world. This is time for them to come home for Christmas. The 2020 Hallmark Classic. I'm sure you all remember it. Yeah. Oh my god. Of course. No, of course.

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know why I didn't consider that. Great pick. And what I like is that they're all so different. I don't know why I didn't consider that um great pick and what I like is that they're also different yeah right right right I mean they kind of spiritually exist

in the same universe but they're not directly tied to each other in any way before we recorded Jeff said that with these drafts he typically does something that's very amusing to him and maybe nobody else. And he was just randomly snickering. And we're trying to figure out what it was. And it makes me so happy that this is.

I thought maybe you'd go all Hallmark. I could have never predicted this. No, this is pretty exciting. I was so sure that that wouldn't be the title that I guessed out loud. And now I feel bad. No, I think it's so much better that you did. Is it time for my last pick? Yeah, it's definitely time for your last pick.

I'm going super recent with this one. This one was last year, so 2022, so it's probably fresh in all of your minds. I think everybody remembers it was directed by the great David Winning, written by Marcy Holland. Four days before Christmas, Elizabeth received a voicemail from an unknown number.

She didn't recognize it. And in the message, it was a man's voice who she doesn't know. And he makes a plea to the love of his life for a second chance. She has to figure out what's going on. It's the Hallmark Classic. Time for him to come home for Christmas. Cool. Cool.

Cool. Great. God, cool, cool. Great. God. There you go. That's my last one. Can I just out of curiosity, and I won't judge you negatively for this, have you seen these movies? Of course, I wouldn't pick them if I hadn't.

Of course. Of course, he says. I want to tell you what I haven't seen that comes out this, he says. I haven't seen, that comes out this year though, I haven't seen Time for Her to Come Home for Christmas yet, but it's new. Maybe a little bit of a viewing for us. Maybe something to do. Is that time for Dog to Come Home for Christmas?

Not yet. Not yet. It's an Air Bud sequel. Well, Jeff has rounded out his four picks. That was the most fun i've ever had but now it's it's time for nick it's time for nick to make his last pick oh there's so many possibilities for this last pick there's so many open and there's so many good christmas movies out there still but i think i have to go with the one that i actually didn't see this like

the first 10 years it was out it took until i met my wife to actually see this but i'm gonna go with elf i knew it was gonna be elf oh i forgot that movie existed yeah it's one that i also forget about sometimes and if you have a chance you should watch the netflix show uh the movies that made us and watch the episode about it because how it got created is really cool to see and how they were like we're hoping it's will ferrell yeah you know, so it's a cool story there. Got a pre-suicide attempt to Artie Lang in it too. Yeah. Yes.

Oh, does it? Yeah, he played Santa Claus. He played the mall Santa. That's right. Man, he was on a little roll there. Yes. He was. He was on a huge fucking roll.

Yeah, he was doing a really great job. He was getting a lot of rolls. He was making a lot of money. He was doing a lot of work. And then something happened. Who could have seen it coming yeah no clue still trying to figure it out we're really a blind side anyway elf uh he eats a lot of sweet shit yeah and it has a blonde zoe de janelle enjoy the uh great it's a blonde Zooey Deschanel. Enjoy. Merry Christmas. Great movie. It's a movie that's so recent for me that I don't have a lot of love for it,

but I do. No, interesting. But I do. I like it. I think Elf is a good pick. My pick is a classic. Oh, no. It's How the Grinch Stole Christmas.

Oh! Yeah. Is that the animated one? Yes, the animated. The original animated one. The good one. Because all the other ones are bad. The original 1967.

I love it. His little dog is great. His little dog with the horn. He's got a little antler. He doesn't want to be a part of the thing. Again, it's a Chuck Jones thing, which I think is so good because it's Chuck Jones. But reading up on it and

everything when you read about like what the movie's about and all this stuff it lists the dog is the second antagonist and i think that's the funniest way that you could think of that character in this movie the second antagonist but how theist. But How the Grinch Stole Christmas, the original animated. Again, a short one, but I really love it. That's fantastic. I was a little bit nervous when you said classic. Oh. Because I feel like mine is also a classic and obscure.

I've been waiting on this one. Okay. My pick, because I think it's obscure. Definite classic. It was something I grew up watching a lot. I watched a lot of my grandpa and fantastic music great puppetry i am going with emmett otter's jug band christmas one of my favorite christmas movies it's a jim henson film it's a production i think it was originally maybe

a tv special great great iconic Muppets type score. You're closer now than ever before. That song, there's a story about Emmett Otter and his mom who live in poverty and they both decide to enter a talent show to try to win money for their

family and they have to go against a rock band that I'm blanking the name they're like the the the uh now what are they called they're like the nightmare or something the nightmare yeah yeah it's great called the river bottom gang yeah we're bottom gang so much great music uh really touching story really well done funny i'd highly recommend it i'm picking it because it is a part of my childhood as well as hopefully people will watch it it's great oh it's

also got Kermit in it it has a well he does like the intro to it it has a hilarious blooper reel surprisingly that you can find on YouTube so at the very least I would recommend watching the bloopers for Emmett Otter's Jug Band Christmas dude I've never even heard of that movie that's awesome thank you

Gavin are you going to check out the blooper reel for Emmett Otter's Jug Band Christmas. Dude, I've never even heard of that movie. That's awesome. Thank you. Gavin, are you going to check out the blooper reel for Emmett Otter's Jug Band Christmas? I don't see why not. That's great. But now that we have all the other picks done, it's time for Gavin's final pick to round out this list. Well, I'll be honest. There's some great stuff still left on the table here.

Tons. There's so much. This is even still a hard pick. But I'm going to go with Angels with Even Filthier Souls. Oh, that's funny. That's funny. The movie from Inside Home Alone, because Home Alone 1 and 2 were taken. I think the first Home Alone had a movie called Angels with Filthy Souls.

But it wasn't a Christmas movie. In the second one, it's the Christmas version of that called Angels with even filthier souls, where the guy says, Merry Christmas, you filthy animals. That's great stuff. And we've done it.

We've picked the greatest holiday movies of all time. Here's Gavin's pick, as he was number one and picked the number one slot. Die Hard, Jingle All the Way, The Snowman, and Angels with Even Filthier Souls. Andrew, number two and picked the number two slot. Christmas Vacation, Home Alone 2, Lost in New York, A Christmas Story, and Emmett Otter's Jug Band Christmas. I got number three in the draft order and picked the number three slot. New York, A Christmas Story, and Emmett Otter's Jug Band Christmas. I got number three in the draft order and picked the number three slot.

Love Actually, A Charlie Brown Christmas, Lethal Weapon, and How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Nick got fourth and picked the fourth slot. Home Alone, Muppet Christmas Carol, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, and Elf and Jeff rounding it out at the bottom. Time for you to come home for Christmas.

Time for us to come home for Christmas. Time for them to come home for Christmas. Time for us to come home for Christmas. Time for them to come home for Christmas. Time for him to come home for Christmas. And those are all of the holiday movies that you will ever need. Are there any movies that didn't make the cut that y'all are sad about? Like, for instance, I was bummed Four Christmases and Christmas with the Cranks didn't make it. I was bummed that after all the Shane Black stuff that Long Kiss Goodnight didn't come out. Oh, that's a good movie.

Iron Man 3, I think, could have been on the list, but wasn't. Nobody picked Nightmare Before Christmas? No, but that's a Halloween movie. Nobody picked It's a Wonderful Life. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's a classic. I only found out about this

recently do you know the only reason that that got so popular is that they lapsed on the right somebody didn't file the trademark or like the claim on it so it became free for tv to show and that's why it's shown every christmas it was a box office bomb. I'm pretty sure Jeff did that with Achievement Hunter. Way to go, Jeff. I made Achievement Hunter a box office bomb? Nobody picked Gremlins. Nobody picked Scrooged. Scrooged is a great one.

I had Frosty the Snowman, Polar Express. Arthur Christmas, Bad Santa. I'd say those are kind of the bigger ones. Can I put in for some like a shit pic, like a film that I think is just so bad

but I don't know why people like it. Sure. I think there are two really dog shit Christmas movies. One is The Santa Claus. I think it's a piece of shit. The second one, The Holiday. Everyone I know seems to really like that film, and it is an absolute stinker.

I don't know what's good about it. I don't get it either. I like Jude Law, but I don't even think he's doing anything in that movie that's worth writing about. I don't really mind any of the people in it. It's just dog shit story and

kind of dog shit performances all around. That replaced TPG for Love Actually. It did. I was about to say, that's in his top three. It's The Holiday. He bloody loves it. I don't think I've ever heard of it. The Holiday. It has Jack Black in it.

It's Jack Black, Kate Winslet, Cameron Diaz, Jude Law. Not interested. I walked out as a teenager. I went in and it was what it was and I was not in the mood for it, so I just left. Why would you watch that as a teenager? I'm pretty sure the soundtrack is, or the score, is

Hans Zimmer. Yeah, it is. That's crazy. On paper, it's excellent. How weird. It's just not a good movie, though. Do you guys remember the movie Jack Frost? Not the one with Michael Keaton. Yes. But the other one, the horror movie. Yes. Yep. Where he

takes off his nose. Yeah, and he goes, fuckers, a snowman. Yeah, I watched that at my friend Matt's house. Hell yeah. What was the joseph gordon levitt um seth rogan one the christmas party that's the night before yeah yeah it's a movie that came out and they were like this is gonna be the new holiday thing and nobody saw it i put that movie and office christmas party on a couple of times and i can't tell you one second of either of those films. Yeah. Just immediately turned into background noise. Okay, so

are we ready to wrap this up then and move on to Christmas songs? This was great. Let us know in the comments which who you'd go with. Who had the strongest list? Is it time for you to make a choice and leave a comment? it time for you to make a choice and leave a comment?

Or time for us to make a choice and leave a comment? Or time for them to make a choice and leave a comment? Or simply time for him to make a choice and leave a comment? You can check out all of our stuff at F***FacePod.com. F***FacePod.com slash first is where you can sign up to support the show directly. And check out our Let's Play stuff that is every Monday for first members it's so funny that Jeff was on the end so we got all of his impacts it's really good I had a lot of fun okay well uh anything else any any parting holiday words for the people at home? A.

Have a good one. Happy holidays. She said it like it was pre-recorded. What you don't, what you didn't know about that is that's actually a quote from Time for Us to Come Home for Christmas. You guys, yeah, I'm dropping,

if you guys had seen the movie, you'd be laughing your dicks off right now. No, I just have trouble with sincerity. You know that. I wanted it to sound real, but I can't. I can't make... I just don't know how to do it. I feel like we all struggle with that on this podcast.

Remember Andrew being excited for your wedding? I'm very excited about that wedding. I couldn't be more pumped about this wedding. Y'all hear they're going to have burgers at the wedding? Fucking crazy. Alright, happy holidays. Bye. Bye. We'll see you next time.