Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe's Parenting Hell - S04 EP20: Ben Mee

Episode Date: April 1, 2022

S04 EP20: Ben Mee Joining us this episode to discuss the highs and lows of parenting (and life) is the Premier League footballer and Burnley captain, Ben Mee. TRIGGER WARNING: This episode contains conversations around premature birth. If you'd like to find out more about the amazing charity Ben discusses on the episode you can here - www.tommys.orgThanks - Rob and Josh xxxAnd yes you heard it right, we are very excited to announce another Parenting Hell Live show!! On top those already announced below (tickets are now on general sale but going fast!!) we're also doing a show at Birmingham Utilita Arena on Friday 28th April 2023. Tickets will be available on pre-sale at 10am on Monday (28th Match) so make sure you sign up to the mailing list to get the link.To sign up to the mailing list if you haven't already just cut and paste this into your browser:parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com ON SALE NOW 14th April 2023 - Manchester AO Arena19th April 2023 - Nottingham20th April 2023 - Cardiff 21st April 2023 - London (The O2)23rd April 20223 - London (Wembley)If you want to get in touch with the show here's how:EMAIL: [e-mail]: @parenting_hellINSTAGRAM: @parentinghellA 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Willicombe. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves, and hopefully you, feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting, each week we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're not coping. And we'll also be hearing from you, the listener, with your tips, advice and, of course, tales of parenting woe.

Because, let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing. Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hell with... Rudy, can you say Rob Beckett? Rob Beckett, um... Can you say Josh Widdicombe? Yes, Josh Widdicombe. Good boy, well done. There we go. Rudy, great name.

I reckon they've got a dog, because that was a very good boy, a dog kind of good boy. Yeah, it was. Where are they from got a dog, because that was a very good boy. A dog kind of good boy. Good boy. Yeah, it was. Where are they from, Rob? Oh, Ryslip. Norfolk. Fuck.

Fucking one day. One day. How are you? Are you doing all right? Yeah, all right. Yeah, a little bit calmer in the house now. So, yeah, all good. Good, good.

Busy week, but we got there. No, yeah, a lot better now. Thanks for asking, Josh. Lou's feeling much better, so get in there. Good, good. Busy week, but we got there. No, yeah, a lot better now. Thanks for asking, Josh. Lou's feeling much better, so get in there. Get in there. You all right? Yeah, I weigh a lot working. I weigh a lot working.

You weigh a lot? What have you been eating? Oh, I weigh a lot. Do you know what, Rob? Yeah? Do you want to hear something pathetic? Go on. But it ends with a lovely bit of wordplay.

Okay. So the week before the Palladium, because I'm recording that. So for the week before, I was like, I'm going to really trim down in these seven days, which is obviously not going to happen. You're on a weight cut for your filming. Yeah, I'm on a weight cut for my filming. Yeah. So I took away, I got some Huel meal replacement powder.

Yep. And a bag of oats. A bag of oats? What a fucking cow. Yep. And a bag of oats. A bag of oats? What a fucking cow. Yeah. And then I opened my suitcase in the hotel. They both exploded. And I said to myself, like, out loud,

I went, oh, there's Huel and Oats everywhere. And then I was like, Huel and Oats, like Huel and Oats, the band. Huel and Oats. You make my dreams come true and i really laughed as i was as i was cleaning hula notes off all of my clothes i was thinking this is this is a hilarious situation that's a wonderful pun it's a wonderful accidental pun and you know it's a new pun because hule is quite new yeah exactly exactly exactly no one's done that before that's a great pun hauling oats

there were hewling oats everywhere there was hewling oats everywhere so there we go my mum and dad my mum and dad are coming to see you josh oh rob i'm stressed about that margate i think they might have seen you by the time this goes out do you know what i find it stressful when people i know are there don't you a little bit it's all i can think about way less than i used to really yes massively so because it is what it is you can't do anything if you could because obviously Don't you? A little bit. It's all I can think about. Way less than I used to. Really? Yes, massively so, because it is what it is. You can't do anything. If you could, because obviously you want to do well in front of people you know.

Yeah. So if you could click your fingers and it'd be a brilliant show, you would for every show, but that's not possible. So what's the point in thinking about it? Also as well, Josh, imagine, right? Imagine if, right, you found this little magic potion you drunk it every show you did was perfect and every word you said just worked and you had this perfect script that worked every single time and the crowd laughed and every night got standard innovation and was exactly the same but perfect everyone what does the potion do

you just look really sexy. And you took that potion and it never changed. It was always the same show. You wouldn't take that potion. Life would be so boring. It would. It would. After about a week, you'd love it for a week.

And then you go, what is the fucking point? I'm dying of boredom here. Oh, but do you know what, Rob? I am drifting off during the show a bit at points because I do know it so well. At least you've got something in common with the audience now. Hey, here we go. Oh, I'm back it so well. At least you've got something in common with the audience now. Hey! Here we go. Oh, I'm back on fire.

Right, do you want an Instagram? Yeah, why not? Do you want to do an email? I'll tell you what, I'll do an Instagram, you do an email, and then we'll introduce our guest. Yeah. I'm just listening to Series 4, Episode 5. Have we done four series?

I've got no idea, mate. That means nothing to me. But it's lovely to be specific. Series four, episode five. We talk about midwives faking birth certificates for sweepstakes. So this was when people were running a sweepstake for the date of birth of their kid.

And I said, if you had like the fifth and it was born, you could just ask her to change it. Anyway, my daughter now 15 was born five minutes after midnight, the day after her due date. In my drug state, after the birth, the midwife somehow managed to convince me to put down her birth date down as the due date as it was less paperwork for them.

So her birth certificate says she was born at 23.59 on her due date, but she was actually born the following day, five minutes later. To this day, Rachel doesn't know she was actually born a day later. What was i thinking oh my word do you know my gran she had she didn't know whether her birthday was eight uh august the 9th or 10th she just didn't know it was like it was a point of debate within the family they just hadn't they just couldn't remember or they just kind of lost track so she never knew whether her birthday was august the 9th or 10th, if there's anyone listening that doesn't know when their birthday is,

let us know. Yeah. There must be people. No idea. We're trying to find out for you. Yeah. Do some inquiries. We've got some contacts.

Do you know what I've realised, Rob? You know when we talk about... I hope no one's shagging at the moment because it's March. It's the time we don't shag. Oh, you shouldn't be shagging in March. Don't shag in March. You know what you're doing. Rose's birthday is, for me, too close to mother's day oh when is it

it was two weeks before yeah that is annoying isn't it yeah and you're like oh god so so we so me and lou when we first started going out her birthday is like the 18th of june but that's what attracted you to her yeah i love that just like the 18th perfect distance from christmas yeah no it was 18th of june and then but we'd started dating properly i think like after she came back from glastonbury one year which is around that time isn't it so it worked out that our first date was like the 20th of june yeah so that then before you get married that's your sort of anniversary date isn't it you sort of do it from then and then so but lou went oh what are we doing for anniversary i was like oh well it's your birthday she's just go out well no but then we're not having an anniversary, are we?

So then she just invented a new anniversary. What? Like the Queen? Yeah. But then that fell by the wayside, and now it's October time when we got married. Yeah. But for a bit, we had to just pretend it was like July. Yeah.

Just so we could have an anniversary. It's a bit cheeky, isn't it? No, you know in your heart it's not your anniversary. You're sat there going, oh, bloody hell, four years ago today, eh? your anniversary you're sat there going oh bloody hell four years ago today eh we're a month in we're still excited four years ago today still excited for life

and you know what's awful Rob what's that start a relationship and you're not sure if it's a relationship and then a big thing a birthday

or a valentine's day comes along in the first month or two oh because you don't want to be shit but you don't want to go overboard. It's such a difficult situation.

Yeah, what do you do? What do you do? And that's Christmas the same. It basically makes you go, I've got to evaluate now in present form where our relationship has got to. We've got to our guest now, Rob. Oh, dear.

Oh, it's a great episode this to be fair yeah it is incredible he's such a lovely bloke and yes it's such an incredible story all preconceptions

of Premier League footballers put to one side he's a really good man and a good family man and he's going to be a credit to the championship next year

when he plays in it with Burnley oh come on now Rob too harsh too harsh I think Burnley might stay up. I hope so. I'm supporting them now.

Yeah, I do look out for their results after speaking to Ben because he's such a lovely bloke. A really interesting story is Second Child was very early, wasn't it? Very premature. Yeah, so should I give a trigger warning? Yes.

That there's a discussion of premature birth here. yes so uh but he's he's absolutely uh he's brilliant on the subject and uh well here he is ben me ben me hello and welcome ben me to the podcast we're very excited professional footballer plays for burnley fc you love sport don't you josh and you've got we've got a proper sportsman. Let's start with what everyone wants to know. How many keepy-uppies can you do, Ben? Well, thanks for having me. The last time I counted was when I was about 14, I think.

Yeah. 1,157. No way. Really? I had my mate counting me on the street. That's a good friend. Ben, I've interviewed a lot of, well, Josh has as well, a lot of athletes, a lot of sports people,

especially I did a podcast called The Magic Sponge of Jimmy Bullard. And I feel like with footballers, it's quite weird. They're sort of two very, I don't know where you are on the spectrum because you have the Jimmy Bullard end, sort of like the Lee Hendry sort of mad sort of end. And then I also interviewed Joe Jordan, who I would say is one of the most intimidating and scariest men I've ever met. I don't know if you've ever worked or met Joe Jordan,

but he terrified the hell out of me. So I'm trying to work out where you fit in the Joe Jordan, Jimmy Bullard sort of middle area. I think Joe Jordan's been on the sideline a couple of times when I've played. And yeah, he sort of stands there and sort of tries to be that intimidating character, but no, I'm not,

I'm not nothing like that. I'm a happy middle. Yeah. Happy middle. I think maybe more, not towards Bullards, but probably a bit the other way. Yeah.

We should say for our listeners that you've got kids. They'll be mad if we went, and you haven't got any kids. So we're just going to talk about Burnley. You signed a good player from Wolfsburg haven't you sorry sorry okay there's a lot of uh mums and dads out there absolutely furious of me going through the he's got a great record that's what i'm saying for 12 million i'll take him at arsenal he's a giant he'll fit in well with us is he is he massive oh you love a massive bloke at burnley well let's calm down off the football chat let's's talk about kids. What's your kids set up at home, Ben?

So we've got a little boy who's three. He's four next month. Yeah. So we're planning a birthday party for him. And we've got a little girl who's 20 months. So, yeah, she's causing havoc at the minute, running riot. Oh, really? Can't take your eyes off her for a second at the minute.

Is it that age where they just sort of grab everything? They know what no is, but they've got no respect for it. She's got no sense of danger or anything. You know, climbing on the back of sofas, in cupboards, pulling stuff out of cupboards, you know, trying to catch him. And yeah, we're just in the process of getting some things on the cupboards to stop him from going in. Oh, I imagine as well, you've got a massive footballer house,

so you'll have loads of cupboards. They're more difficult, the price of being a footballer. Well, I play for Birmingham, so it's not that massive. Yeah, a bit different, maybe. Okay, fair enough. And how's the planning of the four-year-old's birthday party going? It's going okay.

I don't know if you know Blaze and the Monster Machine, but... No, what's that? Blaze and the Monster Machine? Sounds like some sort of drug deal. Yeah, it's some monster trucks. And actually, he's not been watching it. He's been watching Peppa Pig recently. Oh, that's the worst, isn't it? When you plan a kid's birthday, like you say, he's a monster trucks. And actually he's not been watching it. He's been watching Peppa Pig recently.

Oh, that's the worst, isn't it? When you plan a kid's birthday, like you say he's into Blaze and the monster machines, but then all of a sudden, like you've booked it all and you've got all the plates or whatever and then all the toys and then they're into Peppa Pig again. So is he off the monster machines

or is he still a bit into it? He doesn't really watch it, yeah, but he's adamantly wants a monster machine party. So that's good. Oh, that's good. But he's been watching Peppa pig and blues clue so i've been i've been singing all the blues clue songs around the training ground and that you know like whistling them going along to him and that's how you find yourself doing that do footballers talk about their kids much like i remember like some quote from cristiano ronaldo where he's like we just talk about our bags and

our phones and our cars and stuff but would you like sit around in the dressing room and go yeah he's not sleeping what would your tips be for like weaning do you ever have those kind of conversations yeah I find it's a place to just moan about your kids a little bit in the dressing room and some of the boys yeah I think we've got quite an old squad so most of us do have kids yeah I mean the other young boys are just talking about gaming and stuff and you know it's a lifetime away i can't relate to that in a minute i'm just not i can't get into that yeah we're pretty um into our 30s a lot of us so yeah we're uh we're chatting about kids a little bit but they're still quite young though i mean like football you know you're only 32 and you've got like you know a four-year-old and a two-year-old

and stuff and a lot of you know football teams are quite young squads and stuff like that so it must be especially now people do have kids later but footballers sort of do have them a bit younger i think because it's sort of different culture yeah i think so i think footballs are more settled in the job i guess and yeah they don't have anything else to do so they might as well have kids so training finishes at 11 well yeah exactly so i think footballs do start down a little bit early so one of our lads has got four, he's the same age as me, he's got four kids and I couldn't imagine

what his 20s were like. And it was tough for you as well as your second because she was, was it 16 weeks premature? Yeah, yeah. So she was born at 24 weeks. Bloody hell.

So yeah, we had a sort of really touching girl with her for a little while. She was in hospital for three and a half months. Bloody hell. And then she came out

on oxygen, so she had oxygen in the house for a good few months after that until the new year. So, yeah, it was quite scary. So, you know, we got through it, and she's a really strong little girl. Aw. You know, a great character, like a real feisty character.

And, yeah, you know, we feel fortunate for the situation we're in now. Yeah, I bet. It makes us really appreciative of having her around and sort of the dynamics of our family at the minute. What was it like, the hospital visit? I can't even kind of comprehend what that experience was like. It was tough. You know, you didn't know what you were going into.

We rang the hospital in the morning to try and get a feel of how she was over the night. Sometimes it was good news. Sometimes it was she'd had a tough night or a rough night and the doctor and nurses had been doing a bit of work on her. So you kind of, you did expect to guess what you were going into, but obviously having to go in separately was tough initially because you were waiting to, well, Sarah mainly went in first.

I let Sarah go in first and I waited to hear how she was when Sarah came out. So I think for a couple of hours you sat in a corridor twiddling your thumbs or trying to keep yourself busy. Yeah, it was tough. How old was she when you first got to hold her? Three or four weeks old. Wow.

Yeah, but again, I was on our our own so we didn't get to see her together for a good few weeks after that so bloody hell we were always going separately yeah that was crazy you know the nurse handing her to him she was so small you're worried about all the wires and everything so oh god just sort of off topic a little bit and i think this is why people are so angry of all those parties going on down the street is when you're having to go in separately and all the stress that caused you and your family in there, in there, maybe allegedly getting pissed up. It's just so fucking infuriating. I don't think you need the word allegedly.

I don't know. I'm just covering myself up. Yeah, exactly. Exactly that. It's just infuriating. Yeah, we couldn't even go in and see her. Our son couldn't meet her for three and a half months as well. So that was frustrating. How did he deal with it? He was really good, actually. He was aware, and every time we came home, he was asking how she was, and he knew she couldn't come home, so he was just sort of

waiting to see her, really, to meet her. Yeah. Did you know anyone that had a premature baby, or was there any help offered, or could you reach out to anyone, or did you just get on with it on your own? Yeah, the help was difficult because it was COVID, so it was kind of new as well, and there wasn't all this Zoom chatting going on, really, as much. Yeah, the help was difficult because it was COVID so it was kind of new as well and there wasn't always Zoom chatting going on really as much. Yeah. And the support wasn't around the hospitals

because everything was sort of locked down and really quiet around the hospitals. Because I think I read Bernardo Silva had a premature baby and did you speak to him a bit about that?

Yeah, yeah. He's a Man City footballer. He is Man City footballer, yeah. I wasn't rubbing that in. I was just friendly when I don't know. He wins stuff. I didn't know you were an expert, Rob.

He's a good footballer. No, no, no. I'm saying that just for people that don't know. He plays for Man City and Portugal. One of the best players in the league. But anyway, Ben, back to you. Well, our first game back was Man City. So we had captains meeting before games with the referee and that.

And just, you don't say anything really like other than, you know, keep your team in order and that. So I just spoke to him before the game, cause he was their captain. I was our captain. And I just mentioned to him about, about all of in hospital.

And I knew that he'd had a, had a little boy, uh, Matthew at 24 weeks as well. So I just had a little chat with him and asked him how he was doing. Cause I didn't really know anyone else that early sort of thing. So just a bit of reassurance was nice. And for him to be doing well, he said he was doing well. So, you know, it just gave me that little bit of reassurance was nice and for him to be doing well,

he said he was doing well. So, you know, it just gave me that little bit of reassurance that things can be, could be okay, like at the end of it. When did you realise this is going to be okay? Like how many weeks into it

did it kind of settle down that it was? I think at different stages, always a worry of something else. You move on to sort of the next thing that, you know, landmarks she passes. So her eyes or her heart or anything like that, muscles, anything like that sort of is a next step, a next landmark.

She's overcome that. She's lower on oxygen. She's breathing better. So I think once she was off oxygen was the main thing. So she'd come out of hospital, but you're still worrying about the saturation levels, the oxygen and stuff. So, and yeah, so that was the biggest sort of worry, I think, her oxygen levels once she'd come out of hospital. So once that had gone, it, yeah. The saturation levels, the oxygen and stuff. And, yeah, so that was the biggest sort of worry, I think, her oxygen levels once she'd come out of hospital.

So once that had gone, it was fine. How much did she weigh when she was born? She was £1.02 ounces. Oh, my God. Yeah, she was... Don't forget the two. Yeah. The difference.

Yeah. Blimey, £1.02. Because, you know, I remember when we had kids and we brought them home to hospital and we were very lucky there wasn't any complications but you're still sort of seeing you know when they're sleeping you go oh just check check if their chest is still going and silly little things like that it must have been very hard once she came off the oxygen not to you know now she you say she's running around and she's feisty at 20 months and stuff but do you feel a little bit more like you're double checking if she's all right still a bit?

Or is that calm down now a bit? Because you could like for all of her life go for all. Is she all right now because of what happened at the start? Yeah, no, probably a bit more protective of her. I bet. With our little boy, it's like, yeah, go on, do what you want. Jump off the sofa and that and stuff. It's a bit more like, oh, just be careful.

That first boyfriend when he comes around, he'll be like. Or girlfriend. Or girlfriend, sure, or girlfriend around, he'll be like... Or girlfriend. Or girlfriend, sure, or girlfriend. Exactly. Yeah, you're right. He'll be a bit more protective of her than probably Jackson here. And how does it work with long-term development? So when she was 16 weeks, is she then at the stage which, say,

if she'd been born on schedule, that she would have been? Or does it affect long-term kind of development and growth and stuff yeah i think it affects affects it long term especially for the first couple years of her life so she's 20 months now which is probably i'd say 16 months maybe a bit more 17 months yeah development wise of course yeah so yeah so she's a little bit behind but i think a determination you can see it coming through i think that'll that'll carry her well yeah well tyson fury what was tyson fury rob well his dad tells the story and i don't know if you've I think a determination, you can see it coming through, and I think that'll carry her well. Yeah. Well, Tyson Fury. What was Tyson Fury, Rob? Well, his dad tells the story,

and I don't know if you've heard much from Big John Fury, but he says a lot of things. But he says he weighed a pound and he could fit in his hand, but he was, I don't know, he was premature. I can't remember how many months, but yeah, he was premature. He was six foot nine, you know, well, heavyweight champion of the world, you know? But it's weird, though, because actually she was,

is it four months early, basically, she was? Yeah, almost four months, yeah. four months yeah so yeah she's gonna be behind because she should have been born four months later so then she'd been at the right level so it's weird i was like well what point do you sort of age them you know i mean because they've sort of been born but not been born if you know i mean because it's sort of it's almost like a sort of they're recreating the womb almost aren't they to keep keep them going at that that age is that that was that you know, the oxygen and stuff? Yeah, basically the incubator, the oxygen.

That's the word I was looking for. Pathetically scrambling around. Someone help me and say the word, please. Someone say the word. I'm talking about something serious. Help me. I think that's what they recreate. Yeah.

Yeah, the feeding tube and everything. So I guess that's the idea. With the kind of development, those early months before the due date, is it just mainly sleeping? Because obviously the first couple of weeks after that due date, the baby sleeps a lot and all that kind of stuff. What's their kind of conscious state in that situation? Pretty much asleep most of the time when you go and visit.

Yeah, very much asleep and just really calm. I can't really remember the exact time when you go and visit yeah they're much asleep and and just really calm um i can't really remember the exact time when she sort of started to be more alert and aware because it all sort of rolls into one and and you know without going back over the pictures and that is it's difficult but once she's come out of the incubator and she's she actually in a cot and i think that was sort of about maybe five weeks before she she came home she got moved to a cot so that was a big moment. Yeah, I'll bet. And then she's keeping you up all night, and you're going, I can't believe this. She was so much easier when she was in the hospital.

What's going on? No, yeah, you're right, boy. It was great to have her home, but yeah, no, she actually slept all right. Oh, really? Because I think she got into a routine. The nurses got her into a routine at the hospital. It didn't work for you? She was a lot better than our first one but we never want to happen again so of course yeah then you're allowed to you know

find positives out of things you know it's not always always the negatives but uh it's amazing though it's just that's been so tough you know obviously you were able to you know take your mind off it a bit by playing football and stuff what about your wife was she working at the time was she off work or not working what how was she coping because it's harder when there isn't something you know you can always go oh go out and see your friends or whatever but you had to be switched on if you're playing a game of football and if you don't have to be it's hard to switch off how was she and don't forget it was hard to see your friends at that time anyway you couldn't even go unless your friend was boris johnson oh i know it's so fucking i'm not you couldn't even go and see anybody. Unless your friend was Boris Johnson.

Oh, I know. It's so fucking... It didn't even directly happen to me but it's so fucking angry that poor people had to go through all this and they're fucking...

Also, the party looked shit anyway, didn't it? It didn't look like there was a good one in there. I don't want to say ABBA with Carrie Simmons. I don't even...

Imagine breaking lockdown for a fucking ABBA party. Fuck off! I think I'd have more respect if he opened up like Spearmint Rhino With 20 mates Do you know what I mean? Went for it, hell for leather ABBA, with all your wife's mates

Come on Boris, that's not worth the fine is it? Sorry Ben Sorry Ben Talking to people about it and stuff Was via Zoom and stuff That must have been so frustrating Yeah, no it was, it was frustrating Sorry, but talking to people about it and stuff was via Zoom and stuff. Like, that must have been so frustrating. Yeah, no, it was.

It was frustrating. But my wife got a bit of support from some of the hospital care unit. Yeah. She works for herself in general. But obviously she's off work when she's had a baby and everything anyway. So it's tough. It's tough. We found, obviously, trying to talk about as much between ourselves, beneficial.

We had Jackson who kept our mind busy, and that was a big benefit that we had in there. They're great distraction kids, aren't they? Yeah. If you're your first kid and you're just at home waiting, they're great for that, kids. They're just complete distractions. No, but it was tough.

It was tough. It was a time of, you can only do so many Zoom quizzes with your family, can't you, I guess? I did none. I made a rule of it, none. I wish I'd done none. I just tapped out at the beginning. I was like, no, it's not going to help me.

It's a stressful time. And doing a quiz with my in-laws is not going to help. We just got back from Centre Parcs at the weekend. Oh, lovely. I don't know if you've ever done it. Have you ever done Centre Parcs? Yeah, it's great. I do like it.

I'm a big fan of Centre Parcs. I used to go to Butlins as a kid, so I feel like I'm cheating on Billy. I'm the same, yeah. Butlins, yeah. Lou's family love it, but it is good, to be fair. All the water park stuff's great.

They love all that, so it's great for kids. Yeah, I love all that. It's great for... It's hard to ask though, isn't it? Yeah, it ain't easy. Especially when you've got them both in a trailer and you're biking up an hill. It's carnage, isn't it?

That's exactly what I was doing. It's awful, isn't it? That's exactly what I was doing. Oh, man. Surely you've got stronger legs than Rob, though. Do you know what? I'm not suggesting that I've got stronger legs than Ben Mee, but I've got pretty

strong thighs. That's all I'm saying, because he has to carry this mess on top all around, basically. Have you done that machine in the gym, Rob, where you push with your legs the gym Rob where you like push with your legs the weights? The leg press?

The leg press. I'm alright at that but I'm not suggesting that I've got stronger legs than Ben Mee but what I'm saying is it is a workout. But you're not rolling it out?

All I'm saying is a two year old kid is heavier than you think and then when you're trying to get it round a corner and you're going up an hill with the trailer. So what did you do

at Setup Parks? What activities were you doing? We got there on a Friday and then we had a trying to get it round a corner and you're going up an hill with the trailer so what did you do at Setup Pulse what activities were you doing we got there on a Friday and then we had a fun filled morning on a Saturday bugged in

yep lovely we had a bit of football with a little man and then I took him to archery my wife took a little girl to some messy play class and my little man

he loves he knows how to push my buttons a little bit you know when I'm getting a bit frustrated and he's not doing something he'll just keep going with it keep going

winding me up winding me up so he was doing that in the archery not loving his arm up and I'm trying to put the bow in trying to get the bow and he's doing it on purpose and he's just like

his arm going limp and that and stuff and by the end of it it was like five toddlers of me doing archery at the end so but yeah then on the way back

we had to we had the dog with us as well so we had to go and fetch the dog we didn't have the bike so we had this scooter we're going up this hill and he didn't want to scoot up this hill yeah so i'm like right i've got the scooter and he didn't want to walk up the hill so he wanted me to carry him i can't carry i've got the two scooters you know everything in my hands and do you have the dog as well yeah we took the dog with us mistake

yeah so but anyway he's not walking up this hill, and he doesn't want to walk on the path. He wants to walk on the other side of the barrier. I'm like, right. So I walk off, you know, thinking he'll follow me and that and stuff. And I turn around next minute, he's falling in a bush, and this woman's trying to get him out of this bush down the hill. And I'm like, and she's shouting, he's landed in nettles, he's in nettles. I'm losing it.

I'm like, oh, yeah. So anyway, I felt like the worst parent in the world at the minute. So at that time, at that moment, yeah. That's a tough age to take him away. Four and two. It's not because they're too young to let him play in the water and stuff.

But when you can take, go like to a holiday with a swimming pool, six and four minor. And that is the first time we've been able to sort of relax on a holiday. Sorry to break that to you. You've got two more years of hell. It's much easier than me. I've got four more years of hell it's much easier than me I've got four more

years of hell so it's good content I said to my wife we're getting a glimpse over the sort of the trenches I feel like we've been in the trenches

for a couple of years and I just getting a glimpse over it so you're not quite out of it your son's still in the trench covered in nettles but

you're out of it with the dog up the hill so that was your winter break from the football yeah half the Premier League were in Maldives and Dubai and I was rocking up a hill in Centre Park with two kids on my back.

Have you thought about renegotiating your contract, Ben? Well, yeah, I might think about it. Yeah, I don't really want to go into negotiations with Sean Dyche. He looks a bit scary. He thinks he's funny, doesn't he, Sean Dyche? He has a few quips, doesn't he? He does think he's funny doesn't he Sean Darsh he has a few quips doesn't he he does think he's funny yeah

do you think he did used to eat worms I've seen him put a worm in his mouth yeah have you alright he's eaten worms just for banter it was early days

it was in his early days not before not now he's matured he don't eat worms no more what's it like because as a footballer you've got quite a lot

of free time or that's the perception I don't know if that's true a footballer, you've got quite a lot of free time or that's the perception. I don't know if that's true. Does that mean you get to do quite a lot of parenting? Like you get to spend a lot of time with your kids? Yeah, I'm lucky because I live

where I'm from sort of thing. So I live with my family. Some of the lads don't live with their families. They live a bit far away, you know, and commute quite a lot. So they commute in two or three hours, some of them, to football.

So I get to drop my little man off at nursery or kindergarten as they call it or preschool. Yeah. And then gets training and then sometimes I can get back

and pick him up sometimes at half three. Oh, nice. Yeah, that's pretty good. I'm lucky to do that. I know who I am. Has he been to see you play? Yeah, he loves it.

Obviously not through lockdown and all the shutdown and that, but when he first came it was the only time he'd sit still really was at the football. He's always on the go but he'd actually sit there and watch the football but when he first came it was the only time he'd sit still really, he was at the football, he's always on the go but he'd actually sit there and watch the football

and take it in and yeah he loves going now Oh wow. And was you a natural when you started playing, was that sort of mapped out for you, your career in football or? No I had to work damn hard for it No but like you know some people it's sort of like you know, you work hard but it's sort of quite clear from an early age

that they've got ability and talent and stuff. Or was you the other way? Yeah, I used to love playing football, yeah, just out on the street as a kid with my friends, just not taking it too seriously. And then, yeah, just went from there and enjoyed it and wanted to do it more and more. Do you think that's where he's heading? Would you want him to be a footballer or would you rather him something else?

I'm not bothered, yeah. I don't really, I know how hard it is to become a footballer or would you rather him something else? I'm not bothered, yeah. I don't really... I know how hard it is to become a footballer. For me, if he enjoys it, he enjoys it. But I'm trying to get into all sorts of sports, taking playing tennis and doing all sorts of other things as well rather than just trying to focus on one thing.

And what about your daughter? I watch you, she's two years old. But can you... Yeah. I don't think, like, with my daughter, who isn't as... You can just tell that my son is so much more active and so much more kind of rough and tumble already at nine months.

Can you tell, like, what she's like as a character? Yeah, I think she's tougher than Jackson, I think. Tougher than the son, like, really determined. She's been kicking... She watches us kick a football around, so she's there trying to kick the football as well. So she just gets involved and gets stuck in. I think her attitude is a little bit similar to myself. Just get on with it.

Do you go on play dates with other footballers? We have done, yeah. We've been to a few birthday parties, yeah. A few birthday parties. Who's in your little parenting crew? So I've got Nick Pope down the road from me. He's got a couple of kids similar age to myself. Matt Loughton, he's got quite a few kids.

Quite a few? Quite a few kids. I've few? Quite a few kids. He's gone with four, so. Oh, God. Are you going to do any more or two enough for you? Four's too many, isn't it? Yeah, I think after our experience that we've just had, I think we'll just see how it goes.

Yeah, there's no pressure from me to have any more. No, yeah. You're absolutely... You're quite happy. You're quite chill. You're quite chilled. I literally, I just Googled about Loughton and a little picture of him with his kid came up. And he did.

That's how many kids he's got. He actually comes up the same amount of times as him playing football. Yeah, the great kids. Really nice family. And obviously, being the kids of a Premier League footballer, obviously you are very, just a normal bloke, it seems, unlike the sort of media's description

of what a premier league footballer is like very sort of sensible and non-flashy and stuff like that do you think it's unfair it's sort of like an unfair description of what they are for their kids to see you know if you're the son of a premier league footballer you automatically assume a certain lifestyle and things you've done where the reality is he's in a you know in a ditch covering metals they don't know the reality so yeah I mean yeah I think you

you take your sort of view off the ones that put themselves out there a lot and aren't watching stuff but there are a lot of others that are

just you know really normal down to people that just get on with things and do everyday normal things so I think the ones

you see that are on the news and in the press and on social media a lot and putting themselves out there, they give off the sort of vibe that that's what we're all like. But like you say, deep down, we're all just dads and trying to get on with our kids. I think as well, at his age at the moment,

he's sort of a bit like, obviously he's citing that you're a footballer and stuff, but he's not like a teenager at school. And like, if Burnley got beat, he's going to get loads of banter and stuff like that kind of thing. So it's like, it'd be weird because you'll sort of be probably retired by the time they go to secondary school,

unless you have some sort of real fucking 41 year old resurgence. What's your plan after football? Have you got a plan after football of what you'll be doing and things like that? Not yet. No, I want to have a few things in doing and things like that? Not yet, no. I want to have a few things in mind and nothing set in stone, but I have options to do and I want to spend time with kids.

That's a big thing. I want to have that time to, because I don't get the weekends. No. We're away a bit of time, but yeah, it'd be nice to have that time to spend with kids and family and take the kids to sporting occasions and stuff and do that. One thing you always miss out on as a footballer is Christmas, right? Yeah. Because that's obviously the biggest day for the family of the year.

And you have to, like, train on Christmas Day and you have to... How much does it affect you? You're playing the next day. So how much does it affect your Christmas Day? It's not the same, yeah. It's not the same as what it would be, I guess. We actually, this year, we got Christmas Day off. I think that's the first time I've ever had it off because our game got postponed on the boxing day.

Oh, yeah. But I ended up being ill the night anyway, so I don't really make the most of it. But, yeah, so you can't really enjoy it as much. So that would be a nice thing to look forward to, I think, you know, spending time, you know, the build-up to Christmas as well is very good and fun and I do remember it anyway.

Because I find that we gig a lot of weekends on Saturdays and weekends and stuff so it like you know Mondays are normally my sort of days off and when the kids go into school that's what I found difficult is when the kids are in school and it's Monday to Friday Saturdays and Sundays become so important because they're the only days the kids are around to see them and stuff like that but then when you're away if you're playing football or gigging it is all because you obviously the traveling you do is all over the place isn't it and stuff you know and how do Burnley get to games are they you know some clubs are flying are you on trains you're on coaches or you're flying how'd you get about no we just bus everywhere seven hours eight hours

on the bus is it no I don't know I don't know what the dash rules are oh no it used to be used to be uh no we train train sometimes Train sometimes with five, but very rarely. Train it, yeah. Yeah, usually train. But away nights in a hotel are quite nice, quite enjoyable. Do you still have to share a room? Well, we're not allowed to at the minute. Because of COVID.

Yeah. I don't think I would anyway at the minute. Quite enjoy it on my own. So you do stay in a hotel before every game. There's never a situation where you're like up with a kid at 4 a.m. And you're like, mate, I'm playing Liverpool tomorrow. Go to sleep.

I've got a man's salad. I don't give a shit how tired your kid is. No, I spare room on a home game. But even then, you can sort of hear the kids if they're up in the night. You're aware of it.

Oh, mate. Shut up. And is your partner a bit more resentful if she understood of that? Because Lou will always go, oh, you've got a busy day tomorrow, look. Shut up. And is your partner a bit resentful, she understanding of that? Because Lou will always go, oh, you've got a busy day tomorrow, look after the kids. But I will be reminded that she looked after the kids in the morning

before that busy day. No, she's very, very understanding now. It's hard because on the day before a game, on the day of a game, she's constantly looking after the kids. I'm sort of focused on the game. And then I play the game and I'm knackered on my day before a game, on the day of a game, she's constantly looking after the kids. I'm sort of focused on the game. And then I play the game and I'm knackered on my day off the next day. But I've got to try and I've got to be with the kids and try and make up for it. So I try and do that a lot and try and make up for her being with the kids for the two days.

Yeah, that's what we do. Sort of trade off. Yeah, she's really good. Have you had any sort of like long injuries when you've had the kids at home? I've done all the ligaments in my ankle and I was off work and we had like a two-month-old and a two-year-old and lou was furious and at one point walked into the other room and i was there my foot up and can you get me a glass of water like that and she walked in holding a baby while the other one was crying around the legs and went to me you need to get better or die

i've had any anything too serious but I had my shoulder recently and I was taking tablets to try and ease the pain and stuff and I couldn't use it for three or four weeks around the house

so I was trying because I wanted to play games and stuff I was strapping it up for games and trying to get through games and I was like I can't change that piece I can't do it

so I was playing on it a little bit but yeah I need to get it right I need just couldn't, I couldn't do it. No way. Yeah, I was playing on it a little bit, but yeah. I need to get it right. I need to get it right. I need to get it right. Exactly. When I was a kid and I was watching football,

and kid players would just move between teams, you don't think anything of it. And then when you grow up, you go, God, it's a huge decision. Say you get to the end of this contract, and then Southampton offer for you, and that would be a huge move for your family and all that kind of stuff. How much does it come into footballers' minds

these kind of career moves will affect their family? Because obviously you're a one club man for the last kind of 10 years, but that's so rare. Yeah, no, I've been lucky. I've been really lucky to actually commute to where I am less than an hour away. So I do know players that commute three, four hours

because the family are in a certain spot and settled and going to school and doing all that so it is a big upheaval I think for anyone any family moving isn't it it's a big upheaval so it's no different to our line of work that if a player moves from one end of the country to another it's still a big a big commitment. Is there pressure from clubs that they need to move closer like if they are four hours away because it does affect you if you're driving or you know even if you're getting driven and you're getting up picked up at five in the morning to get to training at nine ten you know it's not good for you is it it's not good for your body to rest is it no definitely i know one of our lads is an hour

and a half away and he gets put under pressure to move in that yeah oh yeah he gets put he's not got any kids either he could just easily move he just doesn't like the area he just doesn't want to he likes what he likes I think players sometimes try and keep it quiet yeah where they're commuting from or how far they are

or they'll go yeah I've got a flat I've got a flat nearby near the training ground and I'll stay at the flat before training and then I'll go back on weekends on time off

and then they're booting it home with an empty flat. Yeah, exactly. Did Crouchy play with you at Burnley for a season didn't he? Yeah, he did, yeah. He trained it all. Yeah, he got the train every time from London, wasn't it? Yeah, he did, yeah. What a bloke he is. That's insane. That is mental.

Paul Merson did that in Middlesbrough. He used to get the train. When Paul Merson moved to Middlesbrough he stayed in London and he'd get the train up and down and you're like, that is not an existence it no it's crazy well no i think paul merson had bigger problems i don't think the long train journey was the issue he didn't even have a young person's rail card at that point robbie so it's a terrible story i've seen a lot of younger footballers go out and about and you know and celebrate after games and stuff is there a pressure on you to sort of go and be part of the you know the team spirit at all especially as a captain

to go out on those nights out when you've got kids and stuff yeah i mean again i'm lucky i'm where i am because we've got parents nearby babysitters on tap so yeah yeah we can go and do it but uh i've organized a couple of family days as well with when we can all get together and and do that as a sort of as a captain i when we can all get together and do that as a captain. I feel like I should be organising things like that. What happens on the family days? Basically, all the ones with the families are running around after the kids. And then the other ones without the families

are just separate, sat away, and just watching us all do our thing with the kids, I guess. It's almost like being a bit of a dad, isn't it? Being a team captain, though, isn't it? Of loads of teenage, that fatherly role, isn't it? No, it is. And like I say, we've got quite an experienced group of younger boys and that and stuff.

But people, even the older lads, are still coming to me sometimes with the most ridiculous things that you've got to try and sort out or asking questions that really don't need answering. What kind of things are they asking for? I can't think on the spot. There's definitely one that's in your head now.

There's definitely one that's... Nah, I can't listen. You won't say rather than you can't yeah that's probably more like it yeah is there anything like you use as a team captain that you like the leadership of being a team captain have you transferred any of those skills to try and keep your kind of children in line i guess so yeah i guess you kind of do you i don't know an example but i think you do take it across with you. I think, you know, sometimes when I'm playing football with Jacks as well,

you're trying to, you're trying to put across that side of it as well a little bit. But I don't, yeah, I don't really know in sort of what sense. Do you wear your captain's armband when you're playing with him? Oh yeah, all the time. All the time. Letting know he's boss.

Two point. Are you in charge of the, are you in charge of the fines and stuff for the players if they're late and stuff like that? Is that the captain's job at Burnley to sort of go, like, you turned up, that's the money for the... Because a lot of clubs, the captain's in charge and there's different fines for different things they do wrong

and it all goes into a kitty for the end of that charity or a big party, isn't it? Yeah, we have a kitty and that's why I take charge of the kitty. And then obviously there's any charity ones as well that we divvy out and sometimes the gaffer takes one for a charity of his choice as well. We have like a spin thing. So we spin a wheel. Yeah.

It's like for finds. And then we have amounts on it and to charity and to the kitty and things like that, to the staff kitty and stuff. Oh, okay. So what are your finds? So if you're late for training, what's the fine or would it just go on the spin? Late for training, you'd actually probably spin a few times, like three times, five times maybe.

What's the highest number on the spinner? 250, I think is the highest, maybe 350. And then you've got times two as well so if you get times two and then you get that and you have to spin again and then if you get like

a 250, 350 pound you obviously double it and that's probably the highest thing you can get. That's great fun to watch though isn't it? If someone's like getting the spinner out.

Oh it's brilliant, yeah it's good fun. We used to have forfeits which was better. We used to have to sing or tell a joke. We have to tell a joke still actually but we used to have to sing

or dress up as Elvis or do something stupid like that. Yeah. There must be points when you're in the nursery run and your kid's kicking off and you're like, mate, I'm not dressing as Elvis because you weren't put on your coat. Come on.

Yeah, dragging him down the path. There's 350 quid on this, mate. Get into nursery. Yeah, too right. Have you been caught out with fines because of the kids and stuff like that? Or is that a get out of jail free card if the kids are kicking off? You know, you can't like turn up a bit late and go,

here's your Elvis costume. I'm like, she went into labour four months early, mate. You hit day off. Now, you know the rules, put on the Elvis outfit. Yeah, I've tried playing that card, but it don't work. No sympathy. But like, yeah, to take Jackson to the nursery in the morning sometimes, you know, trying to get him out of the house

and get his breakfast down and stuff. And, you know, knowing, to take Jackson to the nursery in the morning sometimes, trying to get him out of the house and get his breakfast down and stuff, and knowing that I'm right on the way of getting there on time or not, it's quite stressful. When I'm at work occasionally, and I think every parent that's at work, while the other parents are left with the kids, will have this. You'll get a text from your partner saying you know this is an

absolute nightmare I'm having a terrible time and you're like I've had that four minutes before live tv shows are you ever like you're like thinking I've got to mark Phil Foden and then the next thing you know your phone goes and it's your wife going mate you can't get him to bed this is an absolute nightmare yeah so if we have a three o'clock kickoff, we usually FaceTime them beforehand. Yeah. So about 11-ish or something like that, I'll FaceTime them and I'll just see chaos going on in the house.

And then she's like, is this happening? I'm going mad. And then I'm like, right, I'll see you later. I've got a game to play. So just cut it short. And yeah, it depends on how it's going. Are phones banned then in the dressing room from a certain time? Or could you check your phone at half-time in a match?

No, I wouldn't do that, no. I just want to switch off and, yeah, not think about anything other than the game. But no, in the hotel or to get to the stadium, the fans are calling the families or whatever and making sure tickets are all right as well and stuff and make sure everyone's sorted for tickets and things, yeah. So that's all going on. Do some players check their phone then at half-time? Or is it just not allowed? the families or whatever and making sure tickets are alright as well and stuff and make sure everyone's sorted for tickets and things yeah so

that's all going on do some players check their phone then at half time or is it just not allowed is it a dumb thing I think many people do it I'd be tempted

you know if you've like you've got like a booking and you're like I swear I didn't fucking touch him I swear because now you can literally go on Twitter

and find it in seconds I genuinely when you said that Rob I thought you meant like for a restaurant like I'm not sure I'm going to make it tonight for 7pm. It's going to extra time, so I'll have to push it back. I thought you meant that as well. You scored a worldie, just want

to go and check it and that. Guys, look at this, watch this. That's not really a massive problem for you though, Ben, is it? No offence, that's not really your game no you're not wrong 11 goals you scored 11 goals man yeah in about 400 games yeah that's not my fault have you got any other questions just before we finish with the final one yeah i did i did one i'm just what i really respect is when we were talking to you about your daughter being born and you're like i'm'm more than happy to talk about it. And I feel like I'd talk about it any time. And did you feel like a duty having been through that to talk about this so that other people have that as a resource, maybe if they're going through it?

And is there that feeling for you as a kind of public figure? Yeah, definitely. Something that I wished that was there at that time was somebody speaking about it and just to sort of hear someone's story, positive story really about it and stuff. So i feel like me speaking about it gives somebody that little bit of hope you know at the end of it it can be it can be okay a little bit like with david silver me speaking to him hopefully for them that's sort of reading what i've been through and

i've done a few articles and and calls on it as well so i felt a bit of responsibility to do that as well i wanted to do it as well i quite you know well. I find it a bit sort of therapy for me as well, talking about it as well and getting it off my chest as well. So yeah, definitely so. And if there's anyone listening to this that is going through that, is there anywhere you'd send them to any websites or any organisations that sort of work with that? Is there anywhere they could go?

Yeah, well, I've been doing a lot of work with Tommy's Charity. They have a Twitter. And what's it? Sorry, Tommy's? Yeah, Tommy's. T-O-M-M-Y-S. And you work with them? Yeah they do a lot of work with families all throughout you know premature birth, miscarriages, stillbirths and any sort of bereavement with babies and support through that as well so do a fantastic job as well. Oh brilliant that's a great shout out that's

Tommy's charity um tommys.org I think the website is. Yeah sure. You're so good at googling Rob I didn't even see your fingers move. Oh mate I, I'm all over it, don't help me. I'm like, you know, in like a thriller, I'm like the bloke in the van on the computer doing all the hacking. You know, they just upload shit real quick. You know, then pull USBs out without checking. Fuck it, I'll do it for you.

The final question, is there one thing about the way your wife parents that annoys you that you don't really want to bring up in case you have a row? Or is she absolutely perfect in case you have a row or is she absolutely perfect in every way ben oh she is perfect in every way yeah of course that goes without saying i guess one thing is you know when um when your kid falls over or bangs himself and that and she does this intake of breath or you know like the kid's absolutely fine yeah and they hear that and the terror on the face and they think have i hurt myself have i hurt myself and then they start crying they's absolutely fine. Yeah. And they hear that and the terror on their face. And they think, have I hurt myself? Have I hurt myself?

And then they start crying. They're absolutely fine. But yeah, so the tendency to do that or, you know, make them noise like, ah, oh yeah. Whoa, you're in a ditch. No way. Oh my God, that must really hurt. You're not crying.

Are you sure about that? I'm glad you wasn't there for that anyway. I know. Ben, thank you so much. It's been a pleasure to talk to you. Ben, it's been so nice to talk to you. No, thank you. Yeah, I appreciate it.

Good luck with the rest of the season. Thank you. Yeah, good luck. I think you've got a good run. I think we'll be all right, Burnley. New striker. Yeah, we need to get out of it. So, yeah, we'll be all right.

I can't believe I'm saying this because I went to Turf Moor and watched Plymouth get relegated in 1998 and I've hated Burnley ever since, but you've turned me around. Good man, good man. Just 24 years it took me, but now I'm all right with Burnley. Cheers, Ben.'ve turned me around. Good man, good man. Just 24 years it took me, but now I'm all right with Burnley.

Cheers, Ben. Thanks so much. Cheers, Ben. Cheers, guys. Appreciate it. Ben Mee there. I love Ben Mee. What a lovely bloke.

I'm now going to be following Burnley for the rest of the season. Yeah, I want him to stay up now because of Ben Mee. Yeah, it's such a switched on lovely bloke, isn't he? Yeah. And also, I'm a bit frustrated

that I got pulled up by a Premier League footballer for not saying boyfriend or girlfriend. Yeah, I know. I mean, what does that make me? You're not as woke as a footballer, Rob. With his stiff necks playing at the back, just edging all the time. Rock hard neck. Yeah, no, he was right

to correct me. But yeah, what a lovely bloke. That is so brutal what they've been through. I think, you know that i'll mention it but you can see why the country's so angry when everyone's got a story like that of being in the hospital or being at funerals or horrible life events where you were doing the right thing and sticking by the rules and when other certain people weren't and he's infuriating because that must have been such a tough time for him and his wife and family but i'm'm going to say it now, Rob. I had a lovely evening singing Dancing Queen at number 10 and I just... Carrie makes the best vol-a-vents.

Yeah, what a legend Ben Mee is. Hopefully, yeah, I'll be willing on Burnley to win the league. Obviously, that's not going to happen. Just sort of survive the league. That's never going to happen. It was tommys.org is the charity, he said, which would be good to get in touch well give that a shout out

it's on Instagram and Twitter yeah it's sort of just helping people with baby loss and things like that so yeah great charity to support

well done Ben Me and Josh I'll see you on Tuesday see you on Tuesday goodbye bye I'll tell you what's upset me now

why is it £2.50 to cross the Dartford Crossing? It's a bridge. You don't actually have to pay £2.50 to cross a bridge. I'd rather swim. And also, why do you get fined when you forget to pay it? You have to remember to pay it. You are getting fined for failing a memory test. It should be illegal.

I'll tell you what I can't stand. Loud typists in cafes on trains. How hard you need to hit the keyboard. Sounds like you're smashing it with a sledgehammer. What about people that run down the park with their prams? What are you doing? Yoga in public. Stop it.

These are the sort of things that upset us and we talk about them on our podcast What's Upset You Now, which is back every Tuesday and Thursday. We have a guest on every Tuesday and previous guests are included. Romesh Ranganathan, Catherine Ryan, Jack D, Rob Beckett, Stuart Lee, Mark Lamar. Out every Tuesday and Thursday, wherever you usually get your podcasts. What's Upset You Now is back.