Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe's Parenting Hell - S7 EP22: Nick Frost

Episode Date: October 6, 2023

Joining us this episode to discuss the highs and lows of parenting (and life) is the brilliant actor and comedian - Nick Frost. NIck's new cookbook 'A Slice of Fried Gold' is available now. Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] INSTAGRAM: @parentinghell MAILING LIST: parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com  A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello I'm Rob Beckett and I'm Josh Willicombe. Welcome to Parents in Hell the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent which I would say can be a little tricky. So to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting each week we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping or hopefully how they're not coping and we'll also be hearing from you the listener with your tips advice and of course tales of parenting woe because let's be honest there are plenty of times where none of us know what we're doing hello you're listening Hi Emmy, can you say Rob Beckett? No. Why not? Because it's too hard because I can't talk to say Uncle Adam's name. Okay, so Uncle Adam and can you say Josh Whittacombe?

That's a long name. It's too long, isn't it? Yeah. Can you say Stiff Neck? Stiff Neck. Nice. There you you go did you recognize that voice role i recognize the little giggle of the dad as tom packman a man we both know yes who now lives in new york and he worked in comedy and he did my tour managing for a bit lovely guy lovely bloke this is his daughter emmy. Lovely guy, Tom. From Gravesend. Went to school with

Gemma Arterton. He did. He used to be in a band with Hannah Arterton, who is her sister. He's getting a real lug. He runs New York comedy festivals now, I think. It's a tricky one to pin down the location as I'm from the UK, but now live in New York with her. She's very New York, his daughter.

His daughter couldn't sound more American. Come on already, I'm from the UK, but now live in New York with her. She's very New York, his daughter. His daughter couldn't sound more American. Come on already, pa. I can't do that. I can only do one quantum. Is there a coffee in here? I'm not sure that's what it's called. Come on, off the sidewalk. What do you think, John?

I think it's awful. I've got a self-tape later. I want to get a job in NYPD Blue. You're nailed on, mate. I've never known anyone more nailed on for a job in my life.

What, your other range of accents? Oh, anything you want, mate. Just fire them at me. Okay, Chinese? Ooh. Thank you, Tom, for that voice nick frost today exciting isn't it very exciting big fan nick frost he's got kids he's got a book out about cooking and i want to ask him about something josh i'll go on i like it when we do this i've done some prep you've done some prep well after ed balls you've decided to find out who it is this time.

No, but Michael sent me an email and it's got a blurb about Nick Frost. Oh, I didn't get that email, did I? Oh, here we go. Here we go. Another clue. Oh, yeah, here we go. But he says that he loves food and he wants his kids to have a good relationship with food, like waking up to the smell of fresh bread and stuff. But it also says he will wear a helmet when he cooks so he doesn't have to listen to the kids now i'm asking about this because i put headphones on listen to a podcast when i'm

cooking so i can concentrate and when i'm like tired enough and doing the dishwasher because i get it done quicker but i don't know if that's mean yes if they're actively talking to me i will talk back to them i can take my airpods out so when i cook i have a podcast or audio book on or the radio but i'll have them out loud what was the podcast well it's normally swearing in it or about boxing they don't hear that they've already got their football on the telly that they don't want to watch well we've got like a kitchen living area sort of thing like there's a sofa in the kitchen that's where they watch telly because we've got a living room that's nicer that's sort of for evenings and special so they're normally in there so if i've got a living room that's nicer, that's sort of for evenings and special.

So they're normally in there. So if I've got a podcast, I'm going to be, like, competing with their cartoons. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Of course. Of course. Fair enough.

That's the issue there. Have we got anything else we're going to ask? I quite like this new thing we do when we discuss the interview beforehand. I was thinking about this. I think we should tell people what they do rather than just say their names. Okay. Because I was listening to a podcast the other day, and they were talking about someone, and I sort of half knew them,

and then they listed the other stuff they'd done. And I was like, oh, that's really helped me place them and has made this interview more interesting. And I thought, yeah, maybe that's what we should do rather than just going, hello, Nick Frost, and then just talking about them. Yeah, but I don't think you want to do it when they're there because i hate that when i'm being interviewed do you know what i mean i would too if i had your cv oh that is great gear that is good yeah yeah yeah so when

you have to sit there for the first bit and they go he's a legend of stage and screen oh yeah that's horrible so i think we could just say Nick Frost, he was in Spaced. Interestingly, like he was just a waiter, not just a waiter, but he wasn't a trained actor. He was just Simon Pegg's mate who he'd worked with in a restaurant. And then he got a role in Spaced and then it's all gone on. He's done Shaun of the Dead. He's done Hot Fuzz.

He's then gone to Hollywood. I think Steven Spielberg described him as like the greatest comic actor he's ever worked with or something like that lovely stuff I really liked him fighting with my family yeah the Steven Murcham film yeah about the wrestling family from like Norfolk also I just had a quick look online and it says that he's in Supernanny it's Joe Frost one of his characters I just don't know because I've've gone on super down it just says joe frost and nick frost are they like siblings or part is that his wife i haven't done enough for you try and work it out try and work it out try and work it out rob why are you doing it try and work it drop it in this is the good thing about us discussing beforehand that you could ask him because it's perfect parenting question.

You could say, do you have a naughty step? And then you'll know whether he is Joe Frost. I will ask him, why he wears a helmet when he's cooking? And are you Joe Frost? Are you Joe Frost? Those are two questions. I'm looking forward to this now. Not that I wasn't anyway.

Fucking hell, that was a bad slip of the tongue. No, I'm looking... You're a bit overworked, Josh. I'm a bit overworked. You need less on your plate. I'm actually happy to just let this run for a couple of hours. I've got time. Yeah, what are you going to do with your afternoon?

I forgot. Breathe. Time to breathe. I'm going to walk the dogs and I've got to sort the house out. Oh, God. Everyone's got to sort the house out. We've got big sorting the house out discussions. We're going to have to get some more storage put in, Rob.

Storage put in the how? Why don't you just move? Because we love where we live. Can I say something as a friend? No, Rob, not everyone wants to live in the countryside. You're so obsessed with where I live. I think for the lifestyle you have and what you and Rose and the kids like to do, I think you should stay where you are.

I think you should stay in Victoria Park. That's what you like. People are different. People are wrong. But you enjoy being wrong. That's you should stay in Victoria Park. That's what you like. People are different. People are wrong. But you enjoy being wrong. That's fine. So you live there. It's great for you and your decisions. However, I think you should stay in Zone 2, wherever it is you are. But I think you

need more space and a bigger garden because when the kids get older, the kids want to play football and play in the garden. It is so lovely to have more space because we had a garden similar size to yours. Then we moved and it's a game changer. You can have so much more fun and time at home. If you're in a lucky enough position to move.

They don't exist in zone two, Rob. They don't exist in zone two. I'm just saying. They don't exist in Victoria Park. Yeah, but you're already saying you need storage. Yeah, we just need a bit of storage. What is storage? It's space, isn't it?

I haven't even used the word garden. And you're obsessed with your big garden. No, big i'm just saying as your kids get older they're going to be less interested in the garden they're going to be out taking crack they're going to get bigger they're going to need more space for their things you're going to have like potentially four bikes in the front rob rose is never riding a fucking bike okay two bikes Two bikes. But I'm just saying, where are you going to put the storage? Like built-in cupboard somewhere? Yeah. But where? In the kitchen.

Right. You're going to extend the kitchen? No, it's a big old kitchen, Rob. Don't have a go at the size of my kitchen. No, but I thought you were changing the kitchen a few weeks ago. Oh, yeah, we are, we are, we are. So how are you having a go at me? You're changing the kitchen.

Oh, you're not extending it, though. You're just redesigning it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. I genuinely, I think, this is my prediction, okay, and we will pan out because we will be doing this in a few years' time, not even just because we're contractually obliged to. We like it.

You will get the storage of the kitchen, redo the kitchen. I reckon within five years you'll move house. I don't think we will. I think you know you will. I think I know we won't. I don't think we will. This is Nick first. Do you want me to do a quick parenting tip before we move on?

Yeah, yeah, if you want to do a parenting tip. There we go. All right. Dear Rob and Josh, I've got two girls, Ella, 15, and 14. We moved recently. We wish we'd done it sooner. It's been a nightmare having teenagers in a smaller house. We haven't got a small house.

Even though we still have storage, we would solve all our problems. You haven't got a small house, but you could get more space, I think. Anyway, I've got two girls, Ella, 15 and 14. Evie was a nightmare sleeper, which didn't really... I just don't agree with storage. When someone buys a cupboard, you don't go, you need to move house. No, but it's like the entry drug. It's like smoking pot before heroin.

I'm thinking of getting some cupboards put in. Do you know where you should go for cupboards? Foxton's, because you need a new house. No, but I would say if you've got enough space for all your stuff, the word storage doesn't get brought up. Because you haven't got enough storage space. You either need to just have less

things or move. No, you don't. That's what I'm saying. What are you saying? You haven't got enough space for all the stuff, and you're going to need more stuff. No, we have. We just haven't got just saying. You haven't got enough space for all the stuff, and you're going to need more stuff. No, we have. We just haven't got enough storage. We haven't got enough space for it now.

We've got a baby, essentially. He's only two. When he starts having things and growing up. He's got things now. He's got fucking things now, mate. I'll tell you that for free. My daughter came home from school the other day with a guitar and a flute.

Where are you putting that in the week? What, in the guitar stand? The flutes are tiny. Yeah, but then they get bigger. How big's your flute? Shoes get bigger. Why did you move to the country? Because we didn't have room for a flute?

Your shoe cupboard at the moment, or wherever you're keeping your shoes, right? Fine, isn't it? Those tiny little feet. Wait until your boy gets his old big size 9 and 10s, you've got a man living in your house. Have you seen the size of me and Rose? Let me put it like this, Josh.

The house you're in now, okay? Imagine if another couple moved in. Well, I don't want that. You didn't have kids. Well, I don't want another couple to move in with us. No, but I'm just saying, that's what's going to happen because they'll grow up

and there's another two adults living in that house. I'm going to say it now. There's no way that my daughter could have more stuff than she's got at the moment. Yes, she will. And it'll be bigger. No. It will.

No. It will. No. It's going to grow. And if you're struggling now with space, you wait till they're 15, 16. We're not struggling with space at all. We're not struggling with space. Just saying. But we're not struggling with space.

They're yours words. I'll bet you 100 quid. Tell you what I'll bet you. Stamp duty. Fuck off. Not on zone two. Not doing that. You got on telly before me.

Anyway, I've got two girls, Ella, 15, and Evie, 14. Evie was a nightmare sleeper and didn't really sleep properly for about five years. When they were little, we would read them bedtime stories and act out all the parts and really get into it. The trouble was it just kept them awake for longer. I realised that when you're telling them a story, you need to get less and less animated as you tell it. Eventually, your voice needs to be totally flat and boring. The monotone delivery will have them asleep much, much quicker.

Trust me, it works. Well, that is a good tip. That is a good tip. Cheers, fellas. Keep up the good work. You crack us up. Josh's kitchen breakdown episode should win an award. This is from Steam.

P.S. Rob, can you say hello to my wife, Joss? She's your biggest fan. Hi, Joss. That's a good tip, that is. Right. Should we bring on Nick Frost? Yeah.

Send you a couple of links on Rightmove I've seen for you. Oh, for fuck's sake. Do you want to do the intro, Josh, or shall I? Well, it's very simple, isn't it? Nick Frost, hello. Hello. That was amazing. Yeah. Wow, it's very simple, isn't it? Nick Frost, hello. Hello. That was amazing.

Yeah. Well, we find it awkward doing intros and being on the end of them when they sort of list things you've done or describe you in a full-on way. We find it a bit awkward and cringe. How do you feel about intros, Nick? A hundred percent feel the same way. Just that my name was enough. It was great. Perfect.

Look at that. We're flying already. Nick, how many kids have you got? Can you let us know the setup at home what's the deal and their ages okay well i've got three that i know about legend i've got an older son with my first wife who's 12 and then i've got two lovely little children who are two and five with my... Is the word current? Current seems weird, because there's kind of scope for another, so... Yeah.

Second? Keep her on her toes, Nick. Keep her on her toes. Second implies it's going to be a three or four. I'm only 51. Fuck it. I should just also point out that your first son is 12

because the phrasing did sound like with my first wife who is 12 for a moment I was like well this is a scoop if your first wife is 12 currently then we're in real trouble with this child we were together for 15 years as well so

yeah it's the child who's 12 so you've got really little ones that are mental and non-stop, and then you've got one sort of probably becoming a bit moody and moving into teenager. So are you having to switch between the two quite effortlessly? Yeah. I mean, I always thought that we'd been up most of the night, my two-year-old, who'd just been sick about two or three times in the night.

So that was kind of annoying. But I mean, that to me is easier than the 12-year-old because that feels really basic and just like change a sheet, wipe a shitty anus. And then you sort the kid out. Am I right? Sorry. And that's just my first wife. I'm allowed one of them a month on this show.

They get served up so easy. It's hard not to, so apologies. But my 12-year-old's like, there's affairs of the heart now, and his heart gets a bit broken, and he likes someone. It's a lot harder, because also as much as I just want to make it go away, there's also, because I'm like a huge people pleaser so what i want to do is just jump in and just fix it but in fact what i should do is just do nothing yes i can guide slightly but i just need to let him feel what that emotion feels like otherwise you get to a point in your

20s and you just don't know how to deal with any of that shit god yeah that is tough isn't it i think that's the hardest thing i mean i've got a seven year old eight and six mine at the end of the year it's that kind of thing where they're going into school now and there's friendship groups and they're my friend they're not my friend and i want to go here and all this kind of stuff and that only gets sort of more intense as they go to teenagers but like you say you can be there and supportive and stuff, but you do just have to do nothing and let them learn. And it's awful.

It is difficult because it's like you want to soothe them. But I mean, I think what being a parent, I've got two boys and a little girl, and I think it's very important. I learned this quite a while ago, but I'm essentially wanting to parent good men, like in their 20s and 30s and their 40s. I think people just parent, let's just parent now until they're not children anymore.

And then you're on your own. It's like, well, if we can do a good job of parenting good men, then I think that's probably the best thing I can do as a dad. Well, that's a nice way of thinking of it. It's the long game, isn't it? You're playing the long game. You know, you want them to know about consent and being a fucking good guy and not being treated like shit.

And I think for many years I had that weird thing where I was like, can someone love me? Anyone? Can this really beautiful girl who hates me and treats me like shit, will you love me a bit? I don't want them to do a bit i don't want them to do that i don't want them to feel that you know so if i can yeah in a way teach them that you don't need any of this shit then that might be enough as a dad do you feel like because you've

got the slightly older child that you've sort of learned that and made a few mistakes not mistakes but like in the past you may have got too involved in trying to help your child because you're a people pleaser whereas now you've sort of learned to step away a bit have you had things where like you've marched up to someone in the playground or told them to do this and do that or from the start was you always let them get in on with it I'm always kind of a fan of sitting back and seeing what they can do you know seeing how they deal with it I think with my older one obviously not people pleaser as in people pleaser in terms of my 12 year old just wanting to take his pain away yeah yeah yeah for

the kids yeah yeah of course you're based in the UK are you yeah yeah yeah I live down in the southwest of London because obviously you work a lot in America and Hollywood and stuff so do you ever go out there much have you considered going out there with your kids I did a job for CBS two years ago when we were there for 10 months and so the kids were there and then I'm very fortunate that my ex-wife and my wife now are friends and they hang out without me and they hang out with the kids and stuff and so we were all there together and the ex-wife came out a few times. And so I was lucky enough to have all the kids with me for quite a bit.

Oh, that's brilliant, because that can always be the bit of the... My dad was married before and had two kids and stuff. And it's so tricky, because it's always different of trying to get it to a healthy relationship between the kids and the other parents. Yeah, well, the kids and the other parents but yeah well the kids are together all the time so that is great we've really me and the mums have really worked hard at it unfortunately i've an amazing partner now who's kind of great with it because i know there are people who'd be like no sorry she ain't coming around that's not my kid. Yeah. It worked great. But to be in LA was, I just couldn't.

As soon as we get out of there, we were like, let's go. Really? I mean, I think it was at the point of the Trump handover as well. So there was an actual conversation with my American agent where it's like, if there's a civil war, will you guys just fly me out? Like then with the kids and stuff. I just never felt safe. I never felt safe driving them to school and they never felt safe at school.

I just didn't like it at all. Yeah. I don't think there's been a firmer no to moving to Hollywood there than that. Also, I'm British, you know, my family are here. I like it here. I like our life. It's like there wasn't a life there.

I mean, yes, it was nice. We could go to the beach kind of every day, but you can't fucking swim because there's great whites everywhere. Not like the men. It's like, go on, kids. You just have to watch them. So your book's about, well, half memoir, half cooking. Do you do a lot of cooking with your kids?

Because I try and do stuff with my kids, but I just find it's quite annoying because they just keep fucking it up i hate it i hate it if i can do it without them being around i would totally or what i'll do sometimes is i'll do like dummy set up so i'll have like a bowl with just flour in that I'll just tend to use. And then they can crack eggs and put ketchup in it and like stir it up and that. Right. But that's a bit like Rocky III, isn't it? Where he just keeps getting fed bums, but they think they're making good cakes. Yeah, right.

Whenever I can feed my kid bums, that's a good day. Like last night, I was like, come on, let's have a barbecue. Tell me, let's have a barbecue tell me let's have a barbecue come on so like we had a barbecue and stuff and they like to kind of be around the coals when they're being lit and it felt good a bit and then it was really smoky and then i lost my rag because they wouldn't move back and i'm like just move away and then it didn't become as fun as i imagined but we got nice burgers in the end. It was fine. As soon as all the smoke stopped and it turned just to like the charcoal and fire

and they can throw little bits of wood in and it was fun again. Because I've got ADHD too, so sometimes I just literally can't control myself. And I'm getting better at it since I've realised I do it. I do get better at it, but I'm a great shirt ripper. I do it. I do get better at it, but I'm a great shirt ripper. So sometimes if I get angry or I can feel a million emotions

and I become out of control, I'll just literally grab my shirt and just tear it in half. Oh, wow. The kids like it. When an adult does something that's really weird, I find kids love that thing. Do you clock if it's a shirt you like i don't give a shit it's gone

i'll go into the downstairs toilet clothed and then i'll come out with no shirt on i mean no what's happened i'll put t-shirt in the bin and like the kids are like daddy where have your clothes gone so is that a manifestation of adhd then like where it's just all a bit overwhelming and you need to let it out yeah i just get so over stimulated and i don't know what else to do i scream into pillows do you ever do pillow screams sometimes after sex not during not during just after there are aspects of adhd that the kids love you know what i mean like we have just millions of characters in the house and we have big daddy chicken and what's that chicken you can't squirt over big daddy chicken daddy robot's nice because he's like a robot that drives the kids to school

but he has like a weird vibe where he keeps saying to the kids would you like me to crash into another vehicle? And the kids are kind of like Daddy Crash! Daddy Crash! They love the fact that Daddy Robot might crash into an oncoming vehicle. So you've got Daddy Robot

drives the cars and what's Daddy Chicken do? Daddy Chicken, he's just like around every now and again so if the kids are somewhere i'll often kind of do and they'll like run out and then i'll just be like a massive chicken for about 10 minutes have you seen the dinosaur dad it's online it's on youtube and on tiktok i think they go daddy dinosaur and all three of the girls his daughters say it he just turns into like a velociraptor but fucks shit up like smashes milk on the floor crisps everywhere jumps on a table but does it in public and stuff like that and the mum is like mortified and the

kids are absolutely loving it that's cool yeah yeah there's bits like that and i've usually put the little baby to bed every night and my partner does our five-year-old but i do this weird thing where i pretend to be a delivery driver who just happens to be in the house and then like i knock on the door and i slightly get his name wrong and he's puzzled he's not sure why this delivery driver's in and then i get him to sign his name on my phone like he's got a delivery and then that delivery is always 60 kisses. Oh. He does the thing where he's quite clever. Like, he pretends he's like, what is this?

So what am I signing for? I'm like, oh, hang on, let me see if he signs it. OK, you got, ah, right, it's 60 kisses. And then he's like, no, but he loves 60 kisses. Oh. Oh, amazing. Are you the kind of person who would embarrass your children in public, like Rob was saying about, would you do big characters and stuff?

Like, my dad in the street would enjoy embarrassing us. My little ones, they don't really get it as much. But the big one, yes, definitely. No, I mean, not loads. My mate Smiley used to embarrass his kids all the time so I'm not as bad as that but yeah I mean especially when it comes to like loving him in front of friends

or trying to hold his hand or give daddy a kissy give daddy a kissy get off yeah I mean being in a restaurant and making a noise is kind of embarrassing but they like it. You know, we do a thing because we live down in Twickenham and they all do it and they all get involved, which I think is great.

And I love it. But we have a thing about how many rugby matches are in Twickenham. You're like 20. But the whole place is just like rampant with men wearing pink cords and wax jackets and they're here for the rugby. We'll all drive around with the windows down and then whenever we see the big groups of men travelling toward Twickenham, we'll all shout individually things along the lines of, come on rugby! It's really funny because my five-year-old says,

play at the rugby I try really slowly past him and I think they love the fatter we shouldn't be doing it and then I like try really fast as well they love it

what did you say your mate Smiley does in various what does he do to his kids is that Michael Smiley yeah he used to like his kids are really I mean they're old now they're proper men embarrassing. What does he do to his kids? Is that Michael Smiley? Yeah, he used to like, his kids are really, I mean, they're old now, they're proper men and people. But like he used to stand at the school gates and shout,

I love you. Pretty loud as they went in. My dad used to do stuff like that to me. I don't think I could do that to mine because he used to make, I can still feel my shoulders going up when my dad used to do that in front of me. He'd like kiss me on the lips

like when my mates were around when I was like 16 going, oh, you're too old to give your daddy a little kiss. I'd be like, fuck off. Kiss daddy. Yeah. Kiss daddy, Rob. No, don't.

It's like a therapy session. You take me back to a pain body. What do they make of your... Because you've got, like, such an exciting, cool career for a kid's dad to have. As the 12-year-old, must be really thrilled by it, or are they embarrassed by it? Honestly, I don't think he gives a fuck.

I was on the one show the other day, and he sent me a WhatsApp, and all it said was you look nervous oh god didn't enjoy it or you look nervous you know what he likes he likes whenever i'm doing a film and there's a drone on set he's all about the drone of that aspect of it and he doesn't really i mean why would he's 12 but he doesn't really know what he wants to do. But I think I'd love to try and get him

somehow onto a set at some point. Loads of money in drone work. Yeah, exactly. I say to him, if you get good

at these things, this could be a career for you. Yeah. Were you actually nervous on the one show? Was he correct or not? No,

I don't give a fuck. The only thing I'm nervous about is when they come in and say just remember please don't swear i'm like oh why are you saying that because now it's all i want to do well i find the hardest thing the one show is making sure your face fits whatever video has just been on because they're all just chatting like they're having a coffee but then there's like a horrendous like cancer appeal video and then like it cuts back to you like yes're having a coffee, but then there's like a horrendous, like cancer appeal video. And then like, it cuts back to you like, Hey,

yes, I got a new book. You know, that'll all. Yeah. Right. Just the face. They did one about fairground safety when I was on.

Next two minutes, I'm like, what is my fairground safety? You've been banned from the one show, Rob though. So you're one of the few people that you know, I've been back on me and Romesh got banned together. Cause we were messing about too much. It's just so funny.. So you're one of the few people that you know. No, I've been back on. Me and Romesh got banned together because we were messing about too much.

It's just so funny. And if you're on it with your mate, it's so hard not to just laugh at everything. Why would they ban that? It seems weird. Yeah, I think it just was a little bit too raucous. Right. Too much energy for the one show.

That's you. I've always said it, Beckett. What day was it? Oh, I can't remember. It was the half an hour one though or was it sometimes the hour one? it's just hilarious

when you've got like Jermaine Genis who used to play for Tottenham talking about badger coals and I'm like I can't there's never going to be a point where I don't find that funny and when Jermaine Genis

ex-footballer just turns to the camera and goes it's sad about those badgers so Rob Romesh you're doing drag in a new series if you like

how can you not laugh? He said something to me on it about like, oh, you nearly got a part in the crown or something like that. I went, yeah, but I didn't. Don't bring that up. I could have listed all the teams that you didn't sign for.

And then he went, why have you always got to make it about football? I thought, Jermaine, you are a footballer before a fucking TV presenter, mate. That's what your career was. And now you've got a new one. Did you always get a part in the Crown, Rob? I didn't know this.

So, you know when that plaster from Essex broke into the palace to speak with the Queen? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I really had to stretch myself to be a sort of mad, ill-educated, labourer, tradesperson that climbed through a window. Oh, wow, that guy that broke into the Queen's bedroom. Michael something. Who got it in the end? I don't know, someone that could act, probably. I can't remember.

I've seen it. He was very good, actually. It's mental, Nick, because you must do this a lot, but probably you don't have to audition anymore, but you go and, like, you learn a scene that maybe involves crying and having a breakdown talking to the Queen, and then, like, you practice it loads. You go in for, like, three auditions and cry in front of strangers in an office, and then they go, you practice it loads. You're going for, like, three auditions and cry in front of strangers in an office.

And then they go, yeah, thanks, it was great, but we're going with someone else. I'm like, I've just cried three times in front of you. I thought about my dad dying of lung cancer. Ten minutes. Yeah, I mean, I think if I'm guilty of anything, I mean, there's lots of things I'm guilty about, but when it comes to auditions, I just never try.

Really? I never learn it. I just read it. I'm just like, oh, just give me it, or don't. I don't give a shit. I mean, I should give more of a shit, I'm sure. Because you came into it a different route, didn't you? Is that right?

You sort of weren't a trained actor as such from the start. You didn't go to school. No, not at all. I was waiting tables until I was like 28 and then simon pegg wrote me a part in space and i was like uh all right let's do this for six weeks and then i went back to waitering and then a second series of space and then after that i got an agent and then i started getting more bits and pieces and then i was like 35 and I was like, all right, let's give this a crack then. You're pretty good.

You're getting work. Let's start taking this seriously. And then did you do any training then? Or has it always been just sort of natural instinct? Yeah, no, just, it's just pretending. Right? You know, what I've always done is that I wanted to be a novelist. So even as a kid, I'd just look at people and listen to their conversations.

And I think it was about learning the emotions. Do you know what I mean? And writing backstories for people you've never met. You're like in the boots, wait for prescription in boots. And you're like, who are these people? Why are you here? That was always the thing I've always loved. So I think when it came to acting, it was just a question of, I mean,

I'm being really basic here, but just becoming that person and knowing their backstory and knowing why they do what they do and how they feel and why they feel what they feel, you know. Amazing. And do you still want to be a novelist? Yeah, I do. I mean, it's odd not being an actor. That's the weird thing about writing a book too,

because it's like, I didn't want to do that thing where, oh, you're an actor and I'm going to do this thing. You're a celebrity in some world. And now here I am doing a cookbook. Well, no, but you are properly into food, to be fair. On your social media, you can tell there's a real passion and love. But this is part memoir, part cookbook. It's called A Slice of Fired Gold.

Fried Gold, yeah. Fried Gold. Sorry, yeah, Fried Gold is it. Well, I just wanted it to be like, yes, I love food. I love cooking. Here's everything I cook at home for the kids and for my family, and this is why I do it. And then also there's some kind of flights of fancy.

And there's a story about ragu and it begins the regular recipe that I used. And then I kind of really slowly just start to introduce these characters, like an Italian lady called Bianca who's 16. And then she meets this guy at a wedding and her father's an alcoholic and it can never be. And eventually they have a little kiss and then they fall in love and they have like loads of kids. And then she dies of lung cancer in her 80s. And then it goes to then add butter. You know what I mean?

I love the fact that you can take a recipe and it becomes like a weird. I like that thing sometimes when you're reading a book or you're reading someone's kind of flight of fancy and you turn a page and you're like, how the fuck did we get here? And I thought it would be fun to do that for the rest of your book as well. Did you enjoy writing it? Because it's a completely different thing to do again.

You're like going, I'm going to sit down and I'm going to do 2,000 words a day or how did it work for you? I don't really worry about the amount i do a day but i'll get up and i'll sit at a desk at like 8 a.m and i'll always have films on in the background or something shit like outback opal hunters or outback speaking of the word outback in it i tend to enjoy so that'll be on in the background, and I'll work until 12. I'll have like 40 minutes off to have a sandwich and a cup of tea,

and then I'll work until 3. Nice. I do love that. When I was a younger man, I wanted to be a novelist. I kind of loved that vibe of you want to write a novel, but you never really write, and you just kind of fall in love, and it hurts so much that you can't move. And you smoke a hundred cigarettes and you eat a kind of watery soup made of

potatoes. And then you see the woman you love and she's with someone else and you want to kill yourself. I kind of love that ennui about writing books and that's fine. And I love that kind of romance about being a novelist but when you start writing films and television and they say okay so we need a first draft in four weeks yeah that kind of romanticized notion of what a writer is goes out the window pretty quick and you have to learn that discipline of write any old shit and just get it down and then we'll fix it later.

Do you think in your book, that's why you've sort of got a few like flights of fancy, sort of like having a little go at that sort of novel-y stuff of creating stories and characters? Was that sort of way to sort of express that? Because it is like about your life as well yeah I just wanted it to be a bit fun as well it wasn't I didn't just want to write who am I to write a friggin recipe book it's like well okay so if I am gonna write a recipe book I want it to have a connection to things that matter to me in terms of family and

food that I love cooking food I love cooking for people. And it's going to be weird and funny. And I'll get a chance to write little bits of fictionalised prose as well. And it's fun. You're writing there about like the beef stroganoff was your favourite growing up and your mum used to make that. And you write about your mum being an alcoholic. And as that got worse, you took over the cooking and started making the beef stro mum being an alcoholic and as that got worse you took over

the cooking and started making the beef stroganoff for yourself and things like that how does that feel where that was your childhood and then now you've got kids the same age you've got your 12 year old which would have been you having to cook that dinner because your mum wasn't very well like yeah how does it make you feel as a parent now right now today today, I think I'm very, I feel very proud that they will never have to go through what I went through. And fortunately, after a long time of working through how I felt about my mum and my dad and my life growing up, I'm now at a point where as a 51 year old man, I fucking completely get why my mom did what she did. And I didn't for a long time. And it made me very resentful and very angry. And as we all know, if you sit with that resentment and anger, you yourself become

a cancer, you know. So I think it was about six or seven years ago that I suddenly was like, you know what, I totally get it, totally understand. And they will never have to feel that. But in writing these books, I mean, my first book too was a memoir and this was a kind of memoir, but it's also about food. But my parents died and I didn't fucking know anything about them. You know what I mean? I didn't know what they were afraid of.

What's your favourite film? What do you like doing? Do you like spiders? You know what I mean? I didn't know any of that stuff. So at least writing these things, there's a chance for my kids to be able to say, well, this is what Dad went through

and this is who he was a little bit. I fucking hate the phrase legacy, but it's a chance to leave them something which isn't just me fucking off a radio because I'm mad or yeah exactly something they can physically pick up years ago I went to the barbican with my ex-wife we went to see a play I've got a really weird thing that if I can feel the bottoms of jeans like catching on the heel of a shoe do you know what i mean yeah yeah but i can feel that it just drives me more and more insane and like we drove to barbican and the traffic was shit so i had the ump anyway and then i could just feel the bottom of these

trousers just keep catching on the bottom of my shoes and And so I got so umpy that I reached down and I essentially tore the jeans so they became chaps. And we're like in the foyer of the barbecue and I'm now wearing denim chaps. To which point my wife just turned around and walked back to the car and that was it we never got to see the place what is it about the jeans is that something from childhood or something we had to wear a bad pair of jeans that were too long or something

i just feel it catching underneath i'm like fuck that why maybe it's about oh why your stupid legs so small yeah something. Something like that. There's always some sort of strange catalyst for it, isn't there? Yeah. Do you think your son will, well, obviously two of your kids are too young, but would your 12-year-old, will he read the book now, do you think? He wants to. He keeps saying, oh, can I have one, can I have one?

His mum's got one. She got the um because I signed it. She said, well, he's signing it. I said, yeah, I wrote all the best. All the best, Nick. I don't know, maybe he's not quite ready yet and I think it would be more questions than answers. Yeah.

As much as you want to introduce your children and not hide things like addiction and alcoholism, personally, I feel like you have to just start to sprinkle it in from now-ish. Did they meet your parents then? Did they meet their grandparents? No, my dad died 12 years ago and my mum died almost 20 years ago. If they've never met them, they've got no sort of memory of them, but it's quite young to introduce that kind of stuff, isn't it, I suppose?

Yeah, totally. But part of that book is there are things that my mum cooked that I cooked and it tastes exactly the same and now they eat and love it so it's like well this is what your grandmother was yeah yes she was also these things but she was also a great cook who at times wanted to spiritually and physically nourish us it's like an heirloom almost a recipe isn't it, of like this is what your grandparents, and if they cook that for their kids, it's sort of a connection, isn't it? Yeah, it's like a time machine.

It's like looking at old Polaroids and being able to actually physically feel what you felt when that Polaroid was taken. My nan had a lemonade recipe that was supposed to be amazing and everyone banged on about it. And then they tried to get the recipe off her before she died, but she refused to tell anyone. That's amazing. It's mental.

I mean, that's dog. But in a way, she's preserved the mystery because no one can ever go, no, I don't think that lemonade was that good. The lemonade now tastes better than it ever did when it existed, if you know what I mean, because it's got these mythical qualities.

Maybe she had an ego where she didn't want anyone to take the glory for what she'd made. Wow. Exactly. Honestly, I'm glad she's gone. I'm glad she's gone, Rob.

Yeah, for that kind of attitude, you're right. I agree with you. Yeah. Keep your fucking lemonade. Your fucking teeth rot in lemonade. Fuck off with it. Were your children fussy when they were small?

I mean, two of them still are, but like, obviously a lot of people struggle with getting their kids to eat like interesting things or like be interested in food. My two-year-old is, I mean this in like the most loving way but she's a big fat hog and chili anything she's given she loves it sometimes we've sat together me and her for like 90 minutes and just grazed through food she loves it it. She trusts it. And she really enjoys it. Now my five-year-old, he went through a phase of really loving stuff. Now he doesn't love stuff as much, although secretly he does, but he's coming around. You can see him starting to now want to

sit and want to eat and want to enjoy everything again. And my year old again went through that phase of loved everything doesn't trust anything but now he's being 12 he's he's really nice actually because when we're together and we're cooking I'm always keen all the kids if I'm cooking like something with a nice rich gravy in I'll always be offering them little spoons of gravy literally every time they walk through the kitchen and i often find that that is a way of getting them to eat because they feel they've been part of its creation they've done it at least give it a try i won't know yeah i mean they're really good the lot i mean my five-year-old does a thing where i have to keep my lid on because i realize

they're not doing it to upset me personally. I made something and it was like a fucking three-hour braise. And it was just absolutely delicious. And we called my little boy to the table. It was really comedically really beautiful because he did a thing where he got about a metre away. Then he rocked forward on one foot and looked. And then he rocked back and went, nope. And then just... He doesn't mean it, you know.

And I know full well that in like an hour's time when the pressure is off, because I think sometimes kids don't like that pressure of, now we're all sitting and eating. I know that he will come back and that plate will be completely finished i think there's pressure though isn't it like when you're an adult sometimes i go around someone's house and they serve something up and i'm like fuck that but you're like no you must eat it because you're at someone's house and they've cooked it for you

you gotta be polite well do you well no you can't just go i don't like the look of that fuck off at someone's house can you do you well i listen i think the thing about being a really good cook is you actually don't get invited many places to eat right because people i think think there's a lot of pressure to get it right but that said we went out sunday and we got a mate of ours who's a chef and it was just amazing just delicious the kids there everyone it was really nice really nice treat to not have to cook are you tempted to open a restaurant no it's too much i worked in commercial kitchens when i was like in my early 20s and it's fucking hard work it sounds like getting it yeah let's open a restaurant but it's like i'm up at 5 a.m buying fish unless you wanted to do something which was i mean what's in my mind at this point is

and loads of people are doing it but like 10 years ago i was like let's just fucking do cheeseburgers just like yeah mash burgers american cheese onions and really good buns it's so simple that'd be a hit i did want to do a thing and i think someone's done it but like in the summer you get ice cream vans but i wanted to do a thing in the winter you get a roast dinner vans so it comes around and you get like a cone of yorkshire pudding and then you can have like roast potatoes carrots cheesy leeks and then you just get gravy on top so it's like a roast dinner but in a cone yeah loads people do burgers burger king mcdonald's can survive together well yeah and then you just get gravy on top. So it's like a roast dinner, but in a cone. Yeah, loads of people do burgers.

Burger King and McDonald's can survive together. Yeah, McDonald's becoming very popular. Nick, there's a couple of things I wanted to ask you from the book. You said you cook with a helmet on, is that correct? Like a crash helmet. Not at all. No, that's just bollocks for the pub where's this thing in the book i cook with a helmet on it says it in the cell that we got sent in the email maybe if i'm cooking bombs

wait to read what it says yeah go on it talks about your mom and the stroganoff and you having to make it and it says now as a parent himself he wants his kids to have a different relationship with food whether it's waking up to smell of fresh bread. Does that happen? Yes. Good, correct. Or understanding that dad will wear a helmet

when he cooks so he doesn't have to listen to them. I don't wear a fucking helmet. I've got little earbuds that I put in. That's what I do. The sound of children's laughter

is sometimes so hateful to me that I put little headphones in and stuff. Not a helmet, though. Where's helmet come from? I reckon helmet. It's weird. I didn't write that. Someone at the publishers, yeah. Spicing it up. I'm surprised Alex Jones didn't ask you on the one show about the helmet. So, you wear the helmet when you cook, Nick. Maybe you had it on on the show, which is why you look nervous.

Well, that said now, I feel like maybe I should develop a cooking helmet. Well, with headphones in and then like onions, you could pull the visor down so you don't cry. That's a great idea. Also, you could just smash the fuck out of garlic simply by headbutting it. Yeah, yeah. And radios that don't work, just

headbutt them at the end of the garden. Yeah, any kind of meat you want tenderised, smash it up, just fucking... Or on your chin, get a rolling pin, fucking roll it out of your chin, give it a network. Guys, this is great. Let's split this three ways. Why don't you ask Nick about the Joe Frost thing

that we found when we were Googling Nick's credits? Your IMDB says super nanny. Yes. Are you any relationship to Joe Frost, super nanny? No, it was just a weird... There was things years ago when I did it, like, we were married. She was my first wife. It's like, no, it happened to be Frost.

I've never even met her. So was you on super nanny? I did the voiceover. Everything good I know about children comes from voicing three seasons of Supernanny. And do you use any of her techniques? Cooking helmet. Cooking helmet?

No, I mean, I'd never like that, putting them on a naughty step thing, because it just seemed like it's fine if they stay there, but if they don't, then you've got that really horrible thing where sometimes when kids just completely lose their fit and you just have to hold them until the fight goes out i was like this doesn't feel right you know i mean yeah i think it's called restraining yeah don't get me wrong i mean i definitely have sometimes when my little five-year-old is like beginning to smash stuff up because he's so angry and he's just like i I'm now going to just hold you for a bit

because I feel like you're going to hurt yourself. Any other tips from Supernanny, Nick, that you picked up really? You know what? It's always the parents. Really? Yeah, because, I mean, a two-year-old's not just born a little b****, is he? It's... His parents have done that to him. 100%. born a little **** is it?

His parents have done that to him 100% so I think there's lots to be learnt there by whatever those parents do just don't do that.

When you're doing the voiceover on something like Super Nanny are you sat there watching the whole episode or are you just blasting through it?

Yeah I'm just blasting through it doing like 10 episodes a day so unless there's like a really compelling storyline and I'm like, oh, hang on, can we watch this bit? Yeah. My question for you, Nick, is in space, where was the house exactly? And does it get people who go to it now as a kind of like Abbey Road,

zebra crossing okay so the house is in like islington tufnell park area and really weirdly my best mate and his family live in that house now no no that's weird yeah for sale about five years ago and they said yeah we'll have it they didn't I mean not big fans of space but they bought the house because it's beautiful

and massive and so sometimes if I'm going to see him and then like there are people outside taking pictures like Mike from space comes out of the space house

which is kind of weird for people but yeah my mate Danny and his wife Vicky and their family bought it. And when it was listed, did it say, this is the house from Spaced? Did they know what they were doing? I mean, the lady that was there was the lady that was there when we shot there. So she was like, oh, well, we shot a TV show here.

And I think Danny was a bit stum about it. He's lucky for the sale that it was called Spaced rather than Cramped. Oh, that's good. That's lovely, Rob. Haunted. Yeah, haunted. Whenever we go and see houses, it's just to make my girlfriend laugh, but quietly I'll pull the estate agent to one side and I'll say,

is it haunted? Do you know what I mean? They're never sure what to make and i'll always ask how much the house weighs and again they're like oh i'll have to check that for you i'm like all right okay the other thing i do to make my partner laugh is when we check in when we're flying to like la or somewhere i really quietly say to the lady who checks us in, are there toilets on board? But you've never used a play mistletoe. I can't believe that about Spaced.

Your friends bought it. That's an incredible coincidence. Yes, it's great. Is your son watched Spaced? No. Honestly, I just... 12-year-olds like KSI and Prime drinks, Josh, not sitcoms. I just can't believe that times have changed this much.

There's not much they can see. A lot of it's like there's a decapitation. I did like six films last year all back-to-back, and I was like, half the time I was just covered in gore. I'm like, oh, more fucking films my kids can't see. There'll be a time in there, know 18 19 20 where you're like oh there's 50 films here that dad made let's have a look or let's just bin them is there anything you would do if your kid said look i know it's going to be embarrassing but we really want you to do strictly oh no way fuck them i did a film called cuban fury years ago about a dancer and then i got

offered strictly off the back of that and i was like no but also for strictly i've noticed over the last however many years i've been watching it they don't know how to dress fat people they always end up wearing like just a big glittery blouse and they end up looking like a big fat egg. How would you dress the fat people on Strictly? There's a question I didn't think I'd be asking on this interview. I wouldn't. I'd just let them be naked. Really long jeans at the bottom and rip the shirt off at the end.

Tickers and long jeans at the bottom and then they have to tear the jeans off and there's like big gold pants underneath. Definitely not doing Strictly even if the kids wanted it. Never. Really? Even the Christmas special, it's only one day of filming, two days of filming. Dick it.

Fuck it. Fair enough. Shall we ask the final question, Josh, unless you've got anything else you want to ask? Yeah, do it, Rob, do it. You want to ask anything about Shaun of the Dead or Hot Fuzz, like an absolute clichéd 40-year-old? I'm just interested in people's careers.

Yeah, I know. Nick don't want to talk about fucking space anymore, do you, Nick? Are you only 40, Josh? I'm 40, yeah. It's fucking terrible. Yeah. It's fucking terrible. The final question that we always ask everyone is,

what one thing your partner does parenting-wise that you're in awe of and you think, wow, she's amazing, couldn't do this without her. And what is one thing that she does where you go, that fucking annoys me? And if she was listening, she might go, fair enough, I get your point. Let's say from the get-go, she wouldn't say oh fair enough i get your point right sure this is just going to be a general thing but she's just an amazing mum do you know what i mean like she's so calm and she's really patient just really gentle gentle. You know what I mean? She's just great.

I literally have no downside to her. But the ick point, the ick bit would be we're all busy. I get it. But if I'm saying to you, oh, could you help me just doing that thing? And then she'll, like, hold a jumper up. She'll say, you know, I'm folding the children's jumpers. Yeah, I get it, you've got kids. I get we've got kids.

You don't have to weaponise the kids just to be a bit fucking lazy. It's like, well, can you help me? I'm making dinner for 15 people. Can you not just put that jumper down a second and just grab a bit of milk? You know we've got kids, Nick? You want to do your fucking braids? We've kids actually but i've got jumpers yeah i'm having to do four different meals because you're a fucking veggie i think

that's a fair point everyone's got little things that frustrate them definitely she's amazing you know brilliant nick good luck with the book, A Slice of Fried Gold, part memoir, part cookbook. Is it out now? When's it out? It is, yeah. It came out last Thursday. Lovely.

Sure, there's 1.8 million copies left. But listen, I really appreciate you having me. Thank you so much. No, it's been an honour to have you on. We love you. It's been a joy. Oh, Nick Frost there. What a lovely bloke really nice we did what we said we'd do we introduced him previously telling everyone what he's been in and done then we asked him about the helmet which was a good thing to bring up because it's not true yeah also rob don't beat yourself up

about slice of fired gold because the typos in the email thank you very much i thought that the old dyslexia getting me but actually it's been written wrong so i don't beat yourself up about a slice of fired gold because the typo's in the email. Thank you very much. I thought the old dyslexia was getting me, but actually it's just been written wrong. So I don't know whether to sack Michael or the person that sent it to him. Could I just say, the thought that Michael has intercepted the email on the way to us and added the helmet bit

to try and fuck up the interview. I mean, yeah, I know how busy Michael is and I doubt he's going back to spell PR blurbs incorrectly. Because I'd say Michael does send emails, but I'd say they're quite copy and paste heavy. Yeah, I'd say that's a copy and paste email. Is that a copy and paste, Michael? It would be really funny if after, what, three years of doing this and never once giving you any kind of bio, just to test whether you'd read it, I dropped in a random fact about Nick Frost cooking in a helmet just to go really i mean i didn't do that but it would have been great a couple of

typos that's what elon musk did to find out who was leaking information they sent out the same email to about a thousand people but they changed certain bits in it slightly so that they could tell who'd copied and pasted it. Oh, that's clever. So every email was actually, there was this one little thing in the email, in the body of it, where it was like an extra space or a typo, and every single email was slightly different.

Oh, it's not a million miles off Colleen Rooney. A lot of people say Elon Musk, Colleen Rooney, and Michael Marden are very similar people. Very similar. I wouldn't want to cross any of them nick frost book a slice of fried stoke fired gold is out now we'll be back on tuesday yes i'll see you on tuesday josh i'll see you then bye hello i'm charles brandreth What's the very first thing you remember?

That's the question I'll be asking my famous and fascinating guests in Rosebud, my new podcast about first memories and first experiences. My first memory is handing my Auntie Muriel a piece of turd. Other guests include Dame Judi Dench, Alison Hammond and Rory Stewart. Download and listen wherever you get your podcasts. Hello, I'm Jen Brister. And I'm Kerry Godliman. And we host the brand new podcast series Memory Lane. Each week, we'll be taking a trip down Memory Lane with our very special guests as they bring in full photos from their past to talk about. And Jen and I will be doing new episodes every week. Come on, we can all be nosy together. Memory Lane Podcast. Available now.