Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe's Parenting Hell - S8 EP46: Marcus Brigstocke

Episode Date: June 14, 2024

Joining us this episode to discuss the highs and lows of parenting (and life) is the brilliant comedian and actor - Marcus Brigstocke. You can listen to his podcast 'How was it for you?' HERE And give them a follow / subscribe where you're there! Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xxx If you want to get in touch with the show here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] INSTAGRAM: @parentinghell MAILING LIST: parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com  A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] NEW ALBUM OF THE SAME NAME IS OUT MAY 10TH - PRE-ORDER HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Willicombe. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting, each week we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're not coping. And we'll also be hearing from you, the listener,

with your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing. Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hell with... Hey Emma. Yeah? Can you say Rob Beckett?

Rob Beckett. And Josh Whitcomb? Josh Whitcomb. Nice one. Is that from New Zealand? Legend? Australia. Rob Beckett.

Why hello you sexy and relatable porridge gobblers. Cara and Will here from Goldbourne, Australia. This is our five-year-old Emmett saying your names. We've been devotedly listening since the late lockdown days after my mum recommended listening to you guys when we were struggling with adjusting to a life with a kid. Your podcast has had a wonderful impact on our lives as parents and Emmett thanks you for his pom pom jar.

You guys are much anticipated part of our date nights on Wednesday evenings. We traveled to Canberra and we fuck while listening to you. That's not what we're supposed to do in Canberra. That's not what I said. On Wednesday evenings, we traveled to Canberra for swing dance classes and dinner and we get to catch up on the week's episode of the journey to and from. Can't wait to see you guys when you tour out here.

Lots of love, Cara, Will and Emmett. And my mum, Nar, or Nah. Nar, lovely. Well, I'm gonna be in Canberra. You told us about the show. I'm waiting for the dates to be confirmed. Autumn 2025, I'll be in Canberra. Oh, that's when I'll be maybe touring the UK.

We'll never know. We'll swap in and out, we take turns. Exactly. That was a nice message, wasn't it? It was nice. Thought it got a bit blue halfway through, but you know. I love that, because people don't expect it from you as much as me.

Exactly. So that really caught me. And I hope, that really caught me off guard and I'm sat down listening. So I imagine if you're on the school run and you just go, I'm gonna put that, oh, you're on a jog on your own or you're walking the dog. And the little old lady goes,

oh, hello, how's the little dog getting in your ear? You just get Joshua and go, fuck. You just fuck. I love it. I tell you what the worst part about that is, their mom listens. Wow, yeah, but look, without them fucking, she's got no lovely little Emmett.

Exactly, no lovely little Emmett. So, don't hate the play, I hate the game. Can I talk to you about my cat? Yes, all okay, trigger warning? Yeah, all fine. So, we went on holiday, yeah, as you know. She moved in next door, Rob. So what do you normally do when a cat goes on holiday?

Pauline, from two doors down, she feeds the cat. Yeah so she goes into house and feeds the cat and the cat stays. Yeah, does the fish. Of course, something needs to feed the fish. How are the fish alright? Yeah good. Algae all cleared up? Algae clean as a whistle. So she does the cat and then she's so clean. Don't know it's actually that filthy aren't they? They're in your mouth all the time. Going in and out of them. Yeah. Like I think a whistle is vilely grim.

Probably one of the most disgusting things you could yell at. Did you ever play blow football as a child? Pardon? football as a child. Pardon? So blow football would be a ping pong ball and you'd both have a straw and you'd kind of try and blow it into the other one's goal. Right, okay, cool. But the problem would be 30 seconds in, the dripping of the spit would start to come out

of the bottom of the straw. Oh, no, no, no. And that's what a whistle would be like. Right. Okay. Yes. Anyway, Algi's gone. Pauline texts me and says that Beryl has turned up at her house and tried to move in when we've gone away. Oh, so rather than Pauline going down, she's going down to Pauline. Well, she did because she did start coming to feed and then Beryl's gone and

moved in with her. And so has Beryl come back? Beryl did come back. Yeah. going down to Pauline. Well, she did because she did start coming to feed and then barrels got to moved in with her. And so it's better will come back. Beryl did come back. Yeah. But that's really handy for Pauline. Also, where you going losing lose weight. You're going to Bromley to take stuff back to the shops. Oscar what our appointment was?

Oh, no, she heard that. You know, when you left that voicemail the other week about the episode, I just wondered when you said you had to get to the appointment, I wondered what the appointment was. Why are you taking your glasses off so nervously Rob? Because I'm scared in case she hits me, I don't want to break them. You don't know what your appointment was. Pilates? I don't know. Okay. Just can't remember Josh what the point was. Why? What was your theory on it? Rob? Well, pardon Josh. What was my theory on it? My theory was that potentially because you can remember the point was it may not have been a super mega

important. It wasn't a doctor's appointment. It wasn't a doctor's. But something booked at 10 o'clock. Yeah, something booked at 10 o'clock. You dropped it off at, it was Pilates. It was Pilates. You were offered to meet me in the high street and swap keys. Yes, it was Pilates. And I offered to, so I kindly offered to meet in the high street, didn't I? Where you already were.

You offered to meet me where you were with my keys. I wasn't kindly come to where you are. Love you baby. Where you going? Come on then. Have fun. Are you taking stuff back, yeah? Are you taking stuff back? I'm not taking this. I can't forget though, don't I? That's my dyslexia. Are you taking stuff back? Yeah.

I forget though, don't I? That's my dyslexia. Whapanoise my dyslexia. Love you, baby. Um, sorry about that, Josh. So that is stressful when you get put under the couch like that. You work, you work me well there. You work me like a puppet master. We work me like a dog. Um, but Beryl's back. She's back, but it is interesting now that when we go away, she's just going to

move out and pretend that everything's normal when we get home as if she hasn't done it, but we know. I know, but she's just like, well, that's the person who's gonna feed me and give me cuddles now while they're away. So I might as well go. She got cats Pauline. Yeah, two of them. Right. And then they all get on. Yeah. So Beryl's in the house like asleep on the sofa.

I think so. Yeah. I just feel like you've been cheated on, doesn't it? It's a bit real. Also, you feel like, it's not going wrong with Beryl. You're like, all right, Pauline, let's go after him. And then you come down to the vet's with me, Pauline. Our friends had that situation. They basically ended up with a cat from someone else on the street, who wasn't that into their own cat.

And then they had a dispute over the vet bill because our friends had to tell the owner that the cat had something wrong with its teeth, I think, and needed a vet bill. And then there was a dispute over whose cat it now was. I can't remember where it was held. That's mental. Well, it's got to be the person's cat who got the cat. Yeah, but I think the person who got the cat had basically washed his hands of the cat. He can't wash your hands of a cat.

The cat decides. Yeah, the cat decides. Anyway, let's bring on our guest. We've had Rachel Parris, his wife, and now we have the man himself, Marcus Brigstock. He is a man who I think I probably would have watched him on TV before. He was even a comedian, Rob. Long career and long life as a parent because he's got two older kids, so in like 20s and then a baby. Is that two years old? Yeah, so there we go. This is how well we remember Rob when we recorded the interview two weeks ago. Yeah.

Do you know what would be my worst nightmare would be like, and someone from, could someone at home sort this out and me and Rob will do it. A quiz where all the answers are like, how many kids has this guest got which guests has got oh god yeah i think i'll be terrible at that yeah i think i'm really bad at it apparently hell quiz about on our guests how much have we listened how much did we take in not too bleak not like you know i've after not how many times in a interview i go yeah Yeah. Yeah.

Let's make the edit. I imagine Michael's got 4000 of them. This is a Marcus at Brigstop. Yes, a great episode. Enjoy. Marcus Brigstop, welcome to the show. Just before we started recording, we were doing a soundcheck. We asked you what you had for breakfast and you in a quite sad voice said yogurt and seeds. Yeah, it really is. It's yogurt and pips. It's really tragic. I've just now started addressing the weight that I put on in lockdown. Oh, wow.

Yeah, I know, right? I just felt it was time. I feel now like- Did you really go for it with Eat Out to help out? Was that your- Oh, mate, I got such value out of that. He helped out so much, three times a week he was helping out. I really did. And I sort of feel now like I've got to address it. And so talk me through your yogurt and seeds. Well, so it's such a tiny amount of yogurt and seeds. Yeah, it's a really tiny amount. And it's got loads of like, it's genuine seeds like sunflower, pumpkin, flax. I think that's the worst seed. I mean, that's linseed. It's literally what you put on

cricket bats. Yeah, we have flax seed. I don't know where it's come from. It seems to have appeared in our house in the last 18 months. But you only need to buy one amount of flax seed in your life, because you can never get through it. It's like the Ainsley Harriet couscous from Costco. No one's ever finished a tub. Not once. Never. So how old is your youngest, Marcus? He is two and two and a bit, two and three quarters now. Right, so you're at that stage where actually you're going at it quite early, but if you want to sort of once you've had kids and you want to sort of get a bit fitter or lose a bit of weight, whatever, it's much easier to start when they're in nursery or school around four and stuff because it's impossible before then.

So that's one of the issues to be honest is that around 7.30am there's half a delicious breakfast left over from here. And about six o'clock every night, there's at least half a waffle and a fairly decent amount of scrambled egg. Or the extra fish finger you put under the grill in case weirdly they do want four for the first time ever as opposed to half of one. they do want four for the first time ever, as opposed to half of one. And that's genuinely like, I'm so compulsive around food. Like Rachel can barely even get started on a meal before I'm going, do you think you'll finish that? You're going to finish that? Oh really? Yeah, just dive in. It's dreadful. But Billy's, yeah, Billy's leftover nosh. It's not even

that nice most of the time. He's sort of pushed it around and he likes to wipe the side with his food. Right. Wipe the side of what? Like the table or... But you'll still go in? Yeah, still go in. What's your rules on consuming stuff that a child's kind of... That they've gummed a bit. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, tragically, Josh, there's barely any rules. I mean, there are now. The rule

now as... Is seeds and yoghurt. Yeah, is seeds and yoghurt. Are you doing the exercise as well, or is it just diet? Yeah, loads of exercise. And I've taken off about a stone. Basically, I was at the Altitude Comedy Festival in April, and like winter sports is the thing for me. That's the one that I'm passionate about, and it was much harder than it should be. It's the only sport I can do. Jason Vale Is it not an advantage when you're going

downhill? Jason Vale Yeah, it is. Jason Vale It just takes so long to get up it on the lift. Jason Vale Until you have to turn or stop. Yeah, you can see him switching the lifts to top power to get me back up. Even the Austrians were like, oh, Zed is, to be honest, Zed is too much. So yeah. Didn't you almost die in a ski lift at altitude, Rob? No, no, I did go when I wasn't that experienced in skiing, I got taken on like a black run or

something when I should have been on a blue and it was awful and I had to just drag myself down. That sounds more familiar. Yeah. I just had to bum shuffle down a mountain. It was horrible. No, I heard a story from Murphy Crosby that you and him and the other pappies were in a ski lift at altitude and you went to take a selfie and you leant back and the door almost opened. Oh really?

I don't even remember that. Maybe it was more shocking for them because it looked like I was going to fall out where I was just in it. But that does ring a bell actually. Yeah. How do I forget that? remember that. Maybe it was more shocking for them because it looked like I was going to fall out where I was just in it. But that does ring a bell, actually. Yeah. How do I forget that? Yeah, that's true. Yeah. I don't even bell out. Is it possible that Jager T played a part in you not remembering that that had happened? Maybe. Yeah. I don't know.

That was probably about 10, 12 years ago, but you should remember when you nearly died, shouldn't you? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that is one of the things you might have remembered. I've done too much stuff, I think. I'm doing many things. Yeah, I remember that now, I completely forgot about that. What's the closest you've come to death, Marcus? Junglers on a bank holiday weekend. That wasn't close, it was literally, it was honestly there, a Christmas show.

No, I did actually, with my biggest son, who's now 21, we were kayaking in Mexico and there was an American father and son who fell off theirs. They didn't have life jackets. They weren't good swimmers and they were both, I'm quite comfortable saying this because I'm dealing with it, fat as fuck. Because there are people that take the piss of being overweight. They were so big. The dad was vast. His little boy was like perched up in here. Anyway, so theirs went over and we went over with my sister and my niece and me and my son to help them. And by the time we'd sort of got them back on their kayak, we'd been washed out to

sea and there were huge waves and everything. It was terrifying. And then one of the kayaks broke and filled with water. It was really awful. How old was your son at the time? He must have been, I think about nine. Fuck it now. So yeah, little enough that you're like, Oh God, you know, this is horrific. Really, really scary. And so what happened? So well, he survived.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wouldn't be telling it with this much. Yeah, no. And then, yeah, we lost him somewhere off the coast of Mexico. But the key thing with these things is you learn. No, actually what happened, my sister went ashore. She managed to paddle in. I said, I think you should go and get help because it was still a bit marginal at that time. And she went and fortunately she dropped my niece off on the beach and came back and I was able to get my son on her kayak and she took him

in and I said, yeah, look, go and get help. And these Mexican guys got a boat, like a motorboat to come and rescue us and they got flipped. The whole boat went over. Oh, really? Fucking hell. My whole thing was monstrous. Then where are the Americans at this point? So the Americans were at this stage. So the dad, yeah, that's why he's slacking them off. He knows the dad. No, the dad, he just couldn't do it. So in the end, I paddled his kayak with his son on the front and him holding onto the side of it. And we managed to get

everyone back in. But yeah, yeah, yeah. But the boat full of, if we're being totally honest, slightly drunken Mexicans went over as well. So yeah, it was awful, really awful. Oh, God. Do you know what? We should ask that question more. It does give a good answer, doesn't it? Yeah, you never know. What about you, Josh? I was in a plane crash, a train crash. What?

Not a plane crash, a train crash. Oh, God, yes. What do you mean? A train crash. Just outside Market Harbour, the train derailed. It was just before the Lester Mercury comedian in the year final. Oh, don't bring that up, that robbery that was in the Lester Mercury New Comedian of the Year award markers. And then the final got delayed.

I was in it because Josh... Rob had to go in the first half. At that point, TV's Josh Whitaker. No, it wasn't TV. I didn't even have an agent. Had a train crash. Bollocks. It was just late. Windows all got smashed. We got derailed off the train.

All the stuff smashed the windows. An announcement came up from the driver saying, we kind of just sat there for about five minutes and an announcement came up and he said, good afternoon. The train is not on fire. To repeat, the train is not on fire to repeat the train is not on fire. Horrible announcement. Nevermind that. How was the gig? Well, I had a good one because I got to go on straight after the

interval because I was late. Yeah, I was late. He won Marcus. He won the new Community of the Year. And I think the reason for that was the train accident because I do if he'd have been backstage with me, I would have gotten his head. I was focusing in on him. Also, were you slightly buzzing from how much peril and... In all seriousness, there's a perspective that means that you're not thinking enough about the gig so that it goes quite well, if that makes sense. I wouldn't recommend it.

No, sure. It's not as sustainable as a career. You was on a train with James Acaster as well. Yeah. Imagine if you two died. The world of podcasting would change. It would be me and Ed Gamble talking about my kids' lunch. Christ alive. You've got generational children.

Yeah, yeah. Which is an interesting situation. Yeah. So we've got my eldest is 21. Yeah. My big son is 21. My daughter's 19 and little Billy will be three in July. So it's a 17 year gap. And how does that feel? Does it?

No, not how does it feel, but like, and they've got different moms, haven't they? That's quite key in that. Yes. Just to get that out there. Other people constantly going, oh, that is why did they? Yeah, exactly. When you say they've got different mums, your oldest and your youngest have got the same mum and the one in the middle is a different mum. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. Family gatherings, it's quite hard to explain. Yeah. Yes, no, they have the big two have got a different mum from

little Bill. Yeah, it is weird. Did you click back in or did you? Yes, I did. I did. I mean, I definitely went into it this time round, more sort of, I don't wouldn't say more relaxed, but just more accepting of the fact that it is always a series of managed failures. And I really don't mean that in the negative sense. Like nothing as a parent is really, I think, ever a whole success. You could have the best possible day at the bench, right?

And the sun's shining, but it's not too hot. They get their cream on, they've got a ball, it's not too windy, lunch sort of works out and everything. And someone will have a sandy crack that will turn red in the car on the way back. It's always managed failure. So I think I was just more accepting of that with Billy. On the red crack, my daughter got something the other day and I was like, fuck, I haven't

thought about that for 20 years. Which was she came back from school having done P.E. and she's like my nipple hurts. And it was the rub of the badge of the school. Oh, I was like, fucking hell, I remember that. The sort of school logo or whatever on the top. The stitching rubbing the nip in P.E. Yeah, I was like, oh my, it was like a nostalgia trip for me. Sorry. Anyway, carry on. They should, they should have those logos in the middle. Children's nipples is a nostalgia trip for me. Sorry, anyway, carry on. They should have those logos in the middle. Children's Nipples is a nostalgia trip. Doesn't sound great. Can we just be clear now not to clip that bit up

for Instagram? I mean, I'm older than the two of you. Did you have proper old Airtex shirts? What do you mean by an Airtex shirt? Airtex was like, that was what we all wore for sport. And it was an incredibly stiff, kind of Hessian-like material. It was called Airtex because it also had loads of tiny holes in it. Yeah, I think we did have that slightly.

But they were unbelievably stiff. And if you did any sort of activity in them, mercifully I rarely did, they would take the top layer of skin off your nips in about five minutes. We had a rugby top that was so stiff, like it was like wearing a cardboard jacket. Yeah. And then we had a vest that was horrible. I wear a vest as a teenager, it's horrible, isn't it? So would you have to wear that under the rugby top? No, no, the vest was like if you're doing athletics or...

You had to wear a vest for athletics? Yeah, and just all other summer sports. And then in the winter it was like you wore a big horrible rugby shirt. And they were unbelievably stiff. Like when they first went on you could hear, if you bent the arms you could hear them go. Creek, yeah. It's got the creek of an ancient knight going into battle. But they didn't protect you from other rugby players, I think.

No. No. If I could ban anything, it'd be rugby at school. I think it's insane. But there we go. Yeah. Not a fan. I remember being at Reading Festival and you were taking your children to see Billie Eilish. Oh, I nailed it. I nailed it. This says the difference in our career trajectories. She was at 4pm the same time as me.

Yeah. Look at her now. Oh, well, when she was at early days. Yeah. So have you done a lot of those kind of things for your kids? Yeah, so much. So much. I mean, Em, my 19-year- old, her first Latitude Festival, she was four months old. And that was, I think that was maybe the first ever Latitude. Everyone

camped behind the big comedy stage and she was four months old and we were all sleeping in a tent and Latitude being Latitude. Oh my God. Can I just say Marcus, from my point of view, four months old in a tent. Foolishness. That was the last time I then bought a motor home. Right. I thought you said you didn't go. You still went. No, no, no. No, we still went. But yeah, we got to sleep at about three or four in the morning and then latitude being latitude, some people came past and went, hey, look, this one's got a push chair outside it.

Oh, no. Oh, my God, this is probably like a bear bear. Oh, God. I struggle with latitude because at most festivals, there's like a performers campsite. And normally, that is basically just for the comedians because there's only a comedy stage and then there's music. But latitude, there's too many performers.

There's people doing absolute shit. There's loads going on where you're like, what the fuck is that? And it's so busy. There's so many people. So I'm not sure that Latitude actually sells any tickets. I think it is only performers watching each other. Just five and a half thousand poets watching Duran Duran on a Sunday afternoon. Incredible, incredible scenes. But yeah, no, I've done all the festivals. And that, you know, that Billie Eilish thing. So my daughter was early teens then, and she loved Billie Eilish.

And we watched her set. And then just as she was finishing, I said, I reckon this will be the last song. We whipped backstage so as Billie Eilish came off and everyone is too, they're as cool as the other side of the pillow right so no one's like clapping or anything and when she came off stage we gave her a huge round of applause and she looked over at my daughter and smiled and waved I say yes. Oh wow that's cool and especially she's gone on now to be this mega star.

It's like you got in early. Super cool. Yeah, yeah. Because I'm at this stage now, right, where my daughter's become in the last three weeks Taylor Swift obsessed. Ah, right. Yeah. You know, you could do a course.

You could do a course. Yeah, there's a Taylor Swift course you can do. Before her gigs in, I don't know if she's done them yet, but the gigs she did in Glasgow, there was a course you could sign up to as a parent. What to learn English so you knew what was going on in the sun. I love you Glasgow, just been a fun. Just been a fun to love you. Yeah, they like teach you everything you need to know about Taylor Swift so you could enjoy the gig.

Because I'm doing that. I'm not doing that, but like we listen to it in the car and we're always listening to it now. Have you got into your daughter's... I've started, on the way home, I just carried on listening to it because I was enjoying it. Do you sit at home now and listen to Billie Eilish? Yeah, I do. With my big kids, I don't know whether this is reasonable or not, but whatever, screw

it. I didn't really let them have any wheels on the bus when they were little. It was proper music from the get-go. Oh really? So yeah, because I just was like, I mean, it's music, isn't it? As long as it's good. So they were into reasonable stuff from early on. But I don't know whether my daughters, I mean, my son, my big son, mercifully has been into weird music from the beginning. Basically, he's been obsessed with gorillas

since they first started. So that's always fine. You know? Yeah. I mean, I kept, now that's what I call Disney, as the only CD in my car for about four years. I'd enjoy that, I think. Yeah, it was fine. They're pretty good, the Disney songs, I feel like. Yeah, they're really good. That Moana one's quality. Oh, so good. How far I'll go, I think. Yeah, it was fine. They're pretty good, the Disney songs I feel like. Yeah, they're really good.

That Moana one's quality. Oh, so good. How far I'll go, that one. I'm so excited for Moana 2. Is Moana 2 coming out? What? Pay attention! Our kids are slightly too old now, aren't they? Well, I'm 51 and I'm going, with or without Billy.

If you didn't have a two year old, it would be suspicious. Well, yeah, it's really good. Yes, it is. I took him to Disney on Ice. Oh my God. I swear to God, his eyes. I was genuinely thinking of- Is a two year old comprehend what Disney on Ice is? No, he didn't have a clue, but they're a massive, it's like it's a knockout. Yeah, yeah. On Ice. There was a massive Maui from Moana and skating around and Moana fell over. I mean, it was incredible. Billy literally didn't blink. He did not blink. Not once. Is it true he's named after Billy Eilish? No, it's not. It's not. No. Don't believe Twitter. I wanted to call him Floyd. His name is Billy

Floyd. Like Floyd Mayweather. Rachel absolutely put call him Floyd. His name is Billy Floyd. Like Floyd Mayweather? Rachel absolutely put her foot down. So Billy Floyd Briggstock or is it Briggstock Paris? Billy Floyd Paris Briggstock. Paris Briggstock. Yeah. That is a serious name.

Billy Floyd Paris Briggstock. There's been a big row because all the Briggstocks, including my eldest son, are all something Owen Briggstock, right? So my dad, he's Nicholas Owen Brigstock. So his initials genuinely a knob. So are you Owen Brigstock, but you just dropped it for comedy? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Marcus Alexander Owen Brigstock, yeah. So anyway, but Billy is not because we wanted to keep Rachel's surname in there.

And we had a terrible ding dong with my mum, which- Did you? Yeah, yeah, proper. She spoke at length for about 10 minutes. surname in there. And we had a terrible ding-dong with my mum, which did you? Yeah, yeah, proper. She spoke at length for about 10 minutes. And I'll just tell you what she finished with. She looked at Rachel and I and she said, so between the two of you, you have destroyed 500 years of Briggstock family history. Fucking hell. You should have got Owen Briggstock actually.

Wait a minute. Is your mum married into it? Yeah. So she's not even Owen Brigstock? No. It's odd. It's odd. Also, you've banged out two Owen Brigstocks. Yeah, exactly.

It's all fine. If Billy hadn't come along, she wouldn't have any different, would she? There's still two. It's all fine. What is the history of the Owen Brigstocks? Is it good or bad? 500 conveying to some bad stuff, Marcus. It's probably bad.

There's some statues that need taken down there. That's what I'm calling. I think there are certain parts of Wales where the Brigstock name is still something that will get people to spit on the floor. Because they hate the nail show. Marcus had a terrible gig at the Glee. Ha ha ha. What are you like as a dad, then? From my experiences of you, you're very chilled out.

You're not a kind of... You're not someone who seems to have strong kind of, I'm going to boss the room, this kind of thing. No. I don't see you as too intense as a dad. No, I don't think so. I have certain places where I have't like a total blind spot. I'd be interested to know from the two of you, actually, you know, as comic,

you do loads of traveling on your own. Right. So you get into a rhythm of, you know, for example, how to get through an airport with minimum fuss. When I do the security thing, if there's any liquid in my bag and there probably isn't anyway, because I've already at home gone, well, I'm not dealing with that. There's no chance. If there's any, it's already in the Ziploc thing ready to come out and it's done. Yeah, so I'm super efficient. And my dream

scenario catching a train or plane or whatever, is that I step onto the train as the doors go, beep, beep, beep, beep, Are you fucking mental? No time wasted. What? Really? Love it. So you're getting the 1204 from King's Cross to Newcastle. I would leave my house in Balham for the 1204 from King's Cross. I would leave my house no earlier than 11.25. What?

Whoa! That is fucked up. I would say that that would allow me time to go and get not just a prep coffee, but a good coffee from the one just around the corner and still make that train. And what if something goes wrong? Well, I don't think it will. But the thing is, you see, when I then travel with the rest of the family, and I have those efficiencies just kind of baked in, and I'm just so used to it,

they do find it pretty awful. Can I just say, I would hate to travel with you Marcus. Sure, that's fine. It would freak me out. Yeah. So this morning I did the school run. Yeah. I got the two kids in the car.

I realized I didn't have a jumper for my son. Yeah. So I had to get both the kids out the car because we're not on a driveway on a road. Josh, I know the answer, but where was Rose? She was away. Yeah, she's away. It's his new cat trade, Marcus. She's away a lot at the moment, Monk.

But we haven't split up. Don't believe the online stuff. Yeah, sure. Yeah. She's just away. They're not together. She's away. Yeah.

But I had to like, I was like, oh, that's annoying. It's fine. But it's annoying. I've got to go back, back and both back in the house. That's probably going to take four or five minutes. It didn't really matter to me this morning. If that had been you, it's game over. Well, it would be that Billy would be quite cold. That's how that would play out.

Marcus, can I ask you a question? Say you're going to Heathrow from Ballum. Yeah. And so say you're flying to Spain, but you're going on your own and then you'd be going with your kids. Yeah. What time would you leave and how early do you get there before? OK, right. It's a midday flight to Spain. Yeah. So you've booked a good one there.

No early get up. No, exactly. Normally two hours before you have to arrive, they suggest. Yeah, so nowadays, if I was traveling on my own, hour and a half maximum, two hours is a nonsense. I agree. Heathrow is slower to get through than Gatwick these days. Gatwick is lightning quick. Do you know the little cut for us well after security?

No. So after security in Gatwick, right? Yeah. I can't remember if it's north or south, but after security, there's escalators that go down to duty free. Yeah. That make you walk through all the duty free

to get escalators back down. The Wiggly Woo, absolute nonsense. Yeah, but if you come out of security, if you do an immediate left, it's almost like the wheelchair accessibility or prac. If you go left there, it's just a straight corridor that takes you into the food and drink area. No duty free.

Oh. Now he's leaving five minutes earlier. You know me so well. I don't drink, but my God, I want the food area. Exactly. And they might have a little bowl of pips and yogurt. Some flax. So sad. Yeah, so I'd leave one hour from Balham to Heathrow, hour and a half to get through the airport. And what about if you've got the kids? Would you holiday as a full family or were just the three? Yeah, leave a couple of days before. It's enough at 9am. Yeah, check into a local awful hotel.

You have to be efficient. And we tried to fly, my sister lives in Canada and we tried to go over there to see them with all five of us. And it was Air Transat and we filled in the thing and I got there and they said, oh, can we have your ESTA forms please? And I went, yeah, there you go. Each one had to be filled in individually. They said, oh no, that's not an ESTA. That's the Welcome Canada.

That was a COVID thing. We don't need that anymore. I went, well, it's the one that's on your website. They went, yeah, but you need this now. So we had to do ESTA forms at the airport. Oh no. They have to be approved before they'll let you through. And each one got approved apart from mine. And we just stood there and there we'd arrived about three hours before the flight and we

just stood there and watched the clock tick down and couldn't get on the flight. No. Oh my God. And I'd left so long. I'd built in about three hours at the airport. And it was just your one didn't come through? Yeah, it came through about four minutes after the plane took off. Oh my god. Was there any part of you thinking let them go and I come later?

Yes, absolutely. We talked it through, but I'm the only one that can drive. So, and it was like going to see my sister, who Rachel doesn't really know yet. Oh god, yeah. So we talked it through. We were just like, oh no. That's like a film, isn't it? And then they get snowed in together. Yeah, exactly.

And then they actually decide that, you know. It's got big planes, trains and automobiles vibe about it. But I am definitely a prick in an airport. Definitely. The kids call it, they go, shit, he's doing his airport walk. So arms quite far from the body. Yeah, a lot of speed. A lot of really big man marks. I imagine you can walk fast. Big long legs. Yes, running speed for the rest of the family. I'm one of those a bit like competitive dad from the fast show. Come on. Come on. Gate 37.

We know this. That's it says on the board there. That's an 18 minute walk. We can do it in 12. Come on. So where would you I can't believe I'm asking more questions about this, but I am. Where would you sit to kill time when you're at the airport? Are you sitting at the gate or are you chilled enough to go to prep? No, prep. 100% prep. For me, it's all about efficiency. So I don't want to spend ages going somewhere. I don't want to queue until you have to queue. I don't want to be at the gate ages before you have to be there. All the dream scenarios is you arrive at the gate as they start letting people through, straight on the plane with just minimal fuss. It's just

the baked in business of traveling on your own being a comic. Jamie Redknapp's like that with Airports. He arrives literally like about, the way it says to check in closes, he's there like a minute before. And then he'll check in, drop his bag off and then he'll walk just continually until he gets on the plane. Yeah. Will he? Yeah, it's just, he doesn't have to sit or wait or stop at all.

I would suggest though that Jamie Redknapp is in with a slightly higher chance of them holding the plane for him than I am. I think the idea of someone on Air Transat going, I don't think we should take off yet. That bloke from the Now Show hasn't cleared Pratt. It just don't make sense. They wouldn't hold a plane for Jamie Redknapp, would they? Jimmy Carr's got a plane to turn around on the runway and come back and got him. It's actually because they saw his teeth.

Reflection. Well, no, he got there and they said, you missed it. He's starting the taxi in. And I think he said, can you tell the pilot that I've asked politely if you come back? And then he was a fan of Jimmy Carr. So he come back to meet Jimmy Carr. Fuck it. Good God, Jimmy Carr.

That's too much power for one man. Yeah. Oh, my God. How good would you feel? Can you imagine that? The feeling of missing a flight? And then actually, you can get on the flight. Why? Because you've been successful in the ego that can create. Oh my God.

Yeah, yeah. Can you imagine how annoyed the rest of the flight were? Yeah, you'd live it. Absolutely live it. Imagine that you go back for something and then you'd hear, ho, ho! Who's that? It's Jimmy Carp! Hello, I'm Marcus Brigstock. And I'm Rachel Parris. Oh, who's that? It's Jimmy Carp.

Hello, I'm Marcus Brigstock. And I'm Rachel Parris. This is How Was It For You? A review based podcast. We're going to be asking each other, how was it for you? It was pretty good, Rachel. About all sorts of different things. Things we've eaten. Things we've seen.

Places we've been. Things we've smelled. People we've met sometimes. Those will be, we'll have to talk about them without giving away who they were. And that will be the challenge you as a listener can enjoy. Exactly. You can get all of the episodes in the places where podcasts are. Have you passed these awful character traits on to your children?

No, no, I haven't. No. So my big lad likes to get there early. And yeah, he's sort of quite nervy about travel. Em is more, I'd say she's more relaxed and Billy, we don't know he's not, not autonomous enough yet. But you know, places he does want to go, he's in no hurry to get there. Yeah, like the playground, you know, you can generate a lot of excitement by saying, come on, let's go to the sand pit. And he's like, yeah. And he's all over it. And then it's a good hour before you can coax even one foot into a sock or anything like that. Did you find that your sort of parenting techniques and some of your little tricks of the trade were

like, because it was a 17 year gap, were like, Rachel might be like, no, I've read a book. We don't do that anymore, actually, Marcus. Yeah. Can't hit them with a shoe. Yeah. We need a car seat now. You can't just strap them in. I genuinely remember that, like, in the back of my dad had a van when we were kids. He had a van and we loved it. Just rolled around in the back of the van. Like a transit van.

Yeah, he deliberately like hit corners quite fast so that we could go, hey! Oh, I'd love that. Yeah, it was good times, man. Yeah, great times. People were fine. But for the bloody health and safety boards were a lot of fun, right? Yeah, exactly. The snowflake-a-ratty. What had I remembered? I'll tell you what I'd forgotten was how competitive new parents are.

Yes, because you've totally left that world. 100%. I'd forgotten was how competitive new parents are. Yes, because you've totally left that world. 100%. And then you have to come back into it. Yeah, the whole business of, oh, mine's crawling or mine's rolling over or mine's walking and all the rest of it. I mean, I've joked about it on stage, but it is true.

If you've already had kids, you know the benefit of your child staying where you left it. Yeah. You don't want them to walk. No, I did very little to encourage Billy to walk, crawl, move or anything. Just give him what he wants. Bring it to him. Yeah, because you think it'll be freeing and it's actually a disaster. Oh, it's a total nightmare. That thing, parents put a thing just out of a child's reach to encourage them to like belly wiggle over to it. And then they're all excited, you know,

he got, he went over there and picked that thing up. I didn't, I just put everything he might possibly need in a pile and put him on top of it. Before having kids, if someone said, oh, he's walking at 11 months, I'd be like, oh, brilliant, well done. But now I'd be like, oh, I'm really sorry for you. I'm so sorry. That's a real shame. Isn't it? Oh, well, let us know if we can help in any way. We're here for you. I don't even like it.

Like nursery have been helping him learn to take his coat and shoes off. And yes, that's one less job, but then you have to find them. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I always knew where his coat and shoes were when I was in charge of taking them off. Yeah. Because it was Rachel's first child. Would you be like wary of going,

oh no, that's what you do. Cause obviously you don't want to feel like you're telling someone what to do and it's quite frustrating. A hundred percent. I had to make any stuff that I definitely knew for a fact look like I was guessing. It looks with these bottles like, I don't know if you can, but it looks like you can sterilize them in the microwave.

Talking to a man that's sterilized 10,000 of them. If this one breaks, I'll get another one. But let's give that a run out. Let's try that. Bosh, bosh, bosh. Straight in the microwave. There you go. Less kit.

Yeah, no, I definitely did. But then I was helpful in terms of the absolute horrendousness of their breathing during the first eight months. You know, when they're still in, often still in your bedroom and they go... Yeah. Like a silence of seemingly about 10 minutes and you've just gone to sleep and you're like, oh, Christ. Yeah. And they do it all the time and sort of croak and fart and squeak and all those sorts of things.

I was good where that was concerned. Yeah, it could be reassuring. It is that weird collision of someone who's seen it all, so it's like, oh, I'll be fine. And someone who's having their first kid, so has all of those things that we associate with having your first kid. All those anxieties. And that is two different worlds colliding. Yeah. And stuff like knowing how quickly to change a nappy. Just knowing that's not finished. Or if we don't change that in the next 10 seconds, that weirdly will form a sort of poo helmet. All up the back and over the head. I still don't understand, three

kids in still don't understand the physics of how they can hook a poo in and around a nappy and right up the back like that. It is astonishing. You'd think it would go down, wouldn't you? You'd think gravity. It would come up through the legs. Yeah. But no, it must be literally a jet of shit. Yeah. Like when you put your finger on the end of a hose. That kind of velocity. Also, and this is terribly wasteful, apologies, I even used to be an environmental campaigner, but went to simply bin a garment. Yeah.

Oh yeah. There are some items aren't there where you're like, nah, I mean, we could definitely try and wash that. But there's no point. No, also, look, we want to save the world and be environmentally friendly, but what kind of world are we living in keeping clothes covered in shit? Yeah. We've got to think what kind of world do we want to live in? Yeah. We're going to save it, but it's not worth it. Save it, but save it for what? I think it would be better to have no humanity than humanity wearing clothes covered in shit. I'm going with that.

Any parent who's gone at a car seat with a small packet of wet wipes and cotton buds trying to pick vomit out of the fastenings and has considered not just binning the car seat but writing off the car. We've all been there. Can't we just say this fell foul of you, Les? We've all been there. Can't we just say this fell foul of you, Les? That happened to Lou the other day. Our eldest, who's eight, was reading in the car and was sick. But they hadn't been sick for ages. But when an eight-year-old's sick, it's like a drunk man. The amount. It's not like, oh, a bit of sick from the baby. It's like, and it's just everywhere. It was awful. Oh, it's so bad. And it's only then that you realize that fastenings and belts and stuff

in cars have a lot going on. They've got a lot of sections. Yeah. Oh, God. Bill's had quite a good warning system when he's going to puke in the car, where you can tell if he goes still and quiet, you're like, we've got about two minutes to find a section of hard shoulder, which you generally don't have anymore, but about two minutes. But the other day, absolutely out of nowhere,

happy as Larry, looking at a book, singing, waving at staff, chatting away, and then just caked everything. Have you seen that clip of the couple at Safari Park, and they've got the little baby and they go, oh, look, there's like a rhino. And then the baby goes, and it's milk everywhere. It's so I'll dig out. Oh, I don't miss it.

Do you know what I mean? I haven't seen a child be sick in a while now because I've got a three and a six year old. Yeah. It's amazing how quickly forget that that was a constant variable. Yeah, it's important to forget as well. You have to filter that out. Rachel was really ill. She had like norovirus or something like that.

We thought Billy was okay watching him on the monitor. Then I glanced back at the monitor and could see he was crying. He had just, through the bars of his cot, he'd just sent Puk across the whole room. And I was the only one who wasn't Paulie. But pleasingly, his monitor is, I assume a lot of people have got these now, but it's like, it's an app on our phone, right? So we can watch him.

Some of his best stuff is when he's just lying on his own, first thing in the morning and he has a chat, he talks to all his company boys and all the rest morning and he has a chat, he talks to all his cuddly toys and all the rest of it. The other morning he did two things. He was singing and then heckled himself. He went twinkle, twinkle, no, not that one. And then started a new song.

I was like, I want to be clear, that's not come from me. But my favorite, the other day he was lying in bed, just chatting away and then really loudly he went, we don't eat farts. And can you record these on your phone then? I don't know if we can record actually, I assume you probably can. We had the plug-in monitor ones and stuff like that, but it's so easy on an app now. Having the temperature, when we got a monitor that told us temperature, that was like an absolute godsend because then you're not constantly flapping around. And is it too cold?

I was so obsessed with my kid was too cold for two years. It's ridiculous. So our one did temperature and then the temperature gauge stopped working. But I actually think it might be a built in thing in that type of monitor where at the age where you don't have to be obsessed about that, it just went, we're not going to do that anymore. I know I think it genuinely just broke. But it was, I mean, he may, it may be like not having a jumper in the car.

He may simply be very cold at night. I can't know. We wouldn't know. We cannot know. Let's talk about your podcast with Rachel. You've gone into the territory of working together. Yeah. I mean, previously you did lip syncing famously

during lockdown together. Yeah, yeah. So we both had COVID really early on. Yeah. So we were right in that. And when we came out and really realized, oh, right, everything's gone, we started the lip sync thing.

And then we started doing a Tuesday night live show on Zoom, which was most comics nightmare. But we did ours through the brilliant James Gill at Always Be Comedy. Best comedy club. So great. And we sort of had a front row of about 20 couples on the screen and they'd have their mics up and they kind of knew the drill in terms of not talking. So they were great. Their live shows are really good. And we should have done a podcast straight away. That's exactly what we were making. When I saw you doing your lip syncing during lockdown, I thought lockdown is very different if you don't have children. Yeah.

Like when you were getting costumes together, I was thinking, I only had one kid. I don't know what I was fucking complaining about. It was fucking mad. Yeah. I was like, Oh, my God, this is impossible. And then you were dressed as Robbie Williams. I was like, unbelievable. In full, let me entertain you make up. In full, let me entertain you make up. We would spend most of a day making one lip sync video, which was also why we stopped. Yeah, it was when we tried to do intergalactic by the Beastie Boys, and I built myself a robot costume and sprayed it silver and sprayed my face silver and then realized I couldn't really

do the words. I just couldn't really do it. And I was like, no, this is stupid now. This is not fun anymore. So we stopped. So tell us about the concept of the podcast. So it's basically what we ended up doing on Tuesday nightclub was just talking about the stuff we'd done. So it's called, how was it for you?

And it's us reviewing things, but we're not reviewing art. So we're not saying, oh, we went to see that film and it was good. But if we it's us reviewing things, but we're not reviewing art. So we're not saying, oh, we went to see that film and it was good. But if we have been to cinema, we might, for example, review popcorn or we might review, we went to see Oliver at the West Yorkshire Playhouse on what happened to be a school's matinee day. So we might review being in a theater with 800 school children, for example. And what would you give cinema popcorn out of? Is it out of five? Yeah, out of five, naught.

Would you? Really? Both of us turned against popcorn in a way that's surprising. Is that popcorn general or cinema popcorn? Yeah, popcorn general. Popcorn is, I think it's pretty awful really. I love cinema popcorn when it's warm.

I love it. Do you? It's quite calorific actually. Lou got the hump with me because I was trying to put in what I was eating on my app thing and I put in cinema popcorn, like large. It was 996 calories. What? Yeah.

No. Wait, was it Butterkist or something? No, it was just a cinema one. Was it the one that's basically toffee? Fuck it, ow. Double check it, but I think it's right. That's a hell of a lot. It is a lot of popcorn. All the more reason. I'd ban it. but I think it's right. That's a hell of a lot. It is a lot of popcorn.

All the more reason. I'd ban it. And mayonnaise is a lot of calories as well. I wouldn't put that on popcorn, but serious calories. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you want to stick to yogurt and seeds. So what have got the best and the worst reviews that you've given? Well, tech updates got a minus.

Apple sent me that thing going, hi, I hope it's okay. We're just gonna just there's a couple of bug fixes for your phone, which is overnight. Don't worry at all. Do it while you're sleeping. And I woke up to a picture of a half bit an apple on the screen of my phone and nothing else. Oh no. Wow. And it genuinely like I complain about my phone a lot because I'm really phone addicted. Yeah. How many hours a day you're doing Marcus? Think I'm down to about five. Yeah, but I don't really trust that because if I listen to a

podcast or a YouTube, just the audio and I'm doing stuff, yeah, screen time. Yeah, I've had quite a few when I've been gigging and it's gone right 12 hours yesterday. I'm like, what? And then you go, well, six and a half of those were ways. Objection, your honor. Yeah, I wasn't also on Twitter apart from traffic lights. So yeah, but that's one of the things, you know, like Billy being too, he needs me for 10 seconds. And then he doesn't need me for four minutes. And then he needs me completely for 10 minutes. And

then he doesn't need me for half an hour. And those tiny bits of time, it's really hard to do anything proper. And your phone is just like, I'll fill that. Yeah, it's terrible for that. And then I'm super conscious of what he's seeing. So from the age, like one and a bit when he could walk, if I left my phone on the sofa and got up, he would pick it up and bring it to me. And I was like, that's so bad. He just knows, yeah, my phone belongs in my hand. Do you know what that's known as passive aggressive? Yeah, it's aggressive from a one and a half year old. Here you go, daddy. You'll probably need this, won't you, while you're boiling the kettle?

Yeah. I saw you looking a bit sad actually, just playing with me. Do you need this to be happy? Yeah, do you need that? I don't know, daddy. Is it how much dopamine do I deliver? Is it the same as Reels or is it a bit less? Billy, it's much less. Do you play out any sort of arguments at home on the pod? Is there any sort of couple arguments on there? Or do you just keep it off pod? Or does it sneak on because it's inevitable with a couple?

We do a bit, but we've had to be... There's nothing better than a couple having a Barney, is there? We've had to be careful. The day of the tech updates, We actually re recorded that section because I was in such a filthy mood. And after we'd done the recording, I went, how was that? And she went, right, she went, well, bit shit really. And I was like, Oh, moody. And she went, you've literally been a nightmare. We ended up rerecording it because I apparently I was surly. Because you're surly.

What are you like when you're surly? Surly and sullen. I think I'm pretty awful to be honest. Just because I'm loud and big and noisy 99% of the time, you know, take up a lot of space. So when I go into myself and I'm a bit quiet and aloof, that is the loudest noise there is. Yeah, yeah. It's good, you know?

It is fairly rare, but like I am around tech especially, I'm like, ah, oh God, nothing works, nothing works. And then after that, just to, just sit in a grump for ages. I'm gonna call it. Do you think you've got a genuine issue with yourself using your phone? Yes. It feels like it troubles you. Yeah, a hundred percent does.

I mean, look, I'm an addict through and through, right? Food. So I've been sober from drugs and alcohol for so long because those two, you make a decision and you stop. So I don't drink and I don't take drugs and I haven't done for over 30 years, right? Be difficult with food to just cut it out. Yeah, exactly.

That's it, I'm done with food now. So with food, you have to make a decision three times a day. Oh, I must be full now because everyone else has stopped eating and the waiters are crying. So that's a tricky one. And the phone is for someone with like an addictive personality. The phone is horrendous because you're never going to hit a rock bottom. You're never going to have an intervention from family. They'll just go. You'll just have a one and a half year old bringing you your phone. Exactly. Exactly. So you know, I am not-

Have you thought about moving to one of those they're called like- a dumb phone, dumb phone. Yeah, yeah, I have. I have. But it's you do need it for work in our job. That's the thing. I know it sounds like a silly excuse, but you do, you know, it'd be so hard just to only do my emails. I want to down a computer. You know, I mean, when you're out and about doing stuff and so your emails once a day, social media is genuinely useful in our job. 100% is 100% as is the news. I mean, about two thirds of what I write is a reaction to things that have happened in the news,

which you know, often, when I take out brand new material that I've written on the day, it will always be reactive to something that's happened there and then because you get a response from an audience then that they're like, Oh, this is exciting. Wow, that thing just happened today. You can't go, I'll have some material for you and the paper lands in its physical form tomorrow morning. Exactly. Yeah, by then everyone's over it, especially these days. So yeah, I have thought

about having a dumb phone and I have tried putting limiters on it and stuff. And I'm definitely better at it than I was. But then I have periods where I just disappear into the vortex of social media. And yeah, you can get a bit comatose, like you just start flicking through and then you're like suddenly realize, you're not on a train or in a car. Yeah, and I don't want to be too indiscreet. My big kids are adults now and it's up to them what information is shared. But I hope they won't mind me saying that in the discussions I've had with both of them,

they've both said now they wish they hadn't had smartphones as young as they did. Oh really? Which obviously at the time they were like, yeah, but everyone's got one. Yeah, when they were three or four. Yeah, they needed the new... At what age did they have them, Marcus? So they had phones because they were going to school on their own, about 10. So they had phones from them, but they were dumb phones.

They had smartphones from sort of 12, 13. Right. And, you know, we put the filters and the da-da-da-da-da and this and that on them. But the truth is, it was the kids we were asking to help us put them on. So if you think they also don't know how to take them off again, you're pissed. I mean, they're like, oh yeah, my parents have put a blocker on my one. Yeah, it doesn't work after they leave the room. But they've both said, yeah, really wish that we hadn't had those. And their age group, they're the first ones to get smartphones as children, first generation

to try and navigate all of that. And then of course, lockdown came along when they were in their late and mid teens, which amplified all of that. Yeah, it was a tough time for that age. So it's been really tough for them and they are by no means alone. And I think I'd be very, very cautious about dispensing any advice to any parent. But I would say if you've got kids who are at the age where they're pestering you either for your phone or to have their own,

the fight you might have with them now is worth it. Don't give them a smartphone. Will Barron Yeah, well, that sort of pencil date for ours is when they start secondary school, getting a phone, but not necessarily a smartphone. Yeah, or that sort of pencil date for ours is when they start secondary school, getting a phone, but not necessarily a smartphone. They're going to a school on their own on a bus. Yeah. But yeah, it's difficult, man. Well, that's it.

I'm in a really good mate of all of ours, actually. I won't say who because I don't want to say about his son, but like, his son was the only one who didn't have a smartphone. He was the only one and he was getting on the bus every day. He was doing about 40 minutes to and from school and he was the only one who didn't have a smartphone. He was the only one and he was getting on the bus every day. He was doing about 40 minutes to and from school and he was the only one. And so in the end, it just made no difference because he was just sitting next to his mate. Looking at his mate's phone. Yeah. Looking at his mate's phone and his mate's phone had even fewer filters than he would have had

if he'd had his own phone. So bless him. He's a super smart kid. He taught to younger kids earned his own money and said I'm gonna get my own phone Tell us the name of the podcast again. How was it for you? I think you're on tour. No, I'm not on tour No, we're to it's it's taking it in turns Rachel's on tour. Oh, it's plug a tour He's doing her brilliant show poise. Well, I assume it's brilliant. I haven't seen it obviously Poise, well I assume it's brilliant, I haven't seen it obviously. You're at home with her again. I've heard all the songs and they're amazing. So yeah, she's touring Poise at the moment and yeah, the podcast, How Was It For You? And it's, I have to say having sort of held out from the world of podcasting, because

mainly because of having Billy and we were busy and all the rest of it, we are having such a good time making it. I know, they're great fun. We love it. Great fun. Final question, Josh? Yes. And this is fun because we've had Rachel on. We always ask our guests if there's one thing that if your partner's listening, I don't know whether she will listen, if you'd like to say that it's just something incredible about her parenting that, you know, you go, oh, that's why I'm with her.

I couldn't do that myself. What an amazing person. And one thing that annoys you, but you haven't brought up because it's awkward, but were they to listen now, this is your chance to tell her. OK, the slightly annoying thing. Let's start with that, because that's right at the front of my mind. I just don't think the telly should go on before nursery. I just don't. Oh, I just don't. Respect. I just, you know.

Big call. It's a big call. Huge call. Yeah, I just, I kind of feel like it just makes leaving for nursery much more difficult. But what if she wants to watch Everyone Loves Raymond? Well you raise a very pertinent issue there. It is hard to know who enjoys telling more. Yes. Billy or Rachel. She loves TV. She loves TV. But the thing she's, I would say, absolutely amazing at is bedtime. Oh, really? Yeah. And she's quite good at putting Billy down as well. Oh, there we go. That is great stuff. No, she's really great at bedtime. And actually she said to me a while ago, don't forget how special bedtime is. And it really is like, Bill being

nearly three, he gets out of the bath and he has some people call it zoomies, right? That mad 15 minutes where he just loves his own nudity and just charges around the house naked, jumps on things, jumps off things, piles up all his teddies, dives on top of them, rolls around. And then the whole business of getting his jammies on, as long as you're relaxed about it, is pretty much the best game there is. You know, it's so fun. It's if you are chilled out rather than going, come on. Exactly. Just want to get downstairs. I'm so fucking tired.

I just want to go downstairs and watch TV. What time is his bedtime, Arcas? 7.30. So basically dinner at six and then bath time at seven lights out at 7.30. But he's nearly three, still in a cot. And we plan to keep him in there for another four or five years if we can. Yeah, I think when they get to like eight and they wander in your room at quarter past nine

and go and can't go to bed, mum, then bedtime loses its magic. Yeah, definitely, definitely. But Rachel's so brilliant at that, that kind of relaxed, playful thing. Whereas I do get the kind of like, just put, you can't go to bed with one arm in a pajama. You cannot. And the truth is he could perfectly happily. He'd love it.

Yeah, he wouldn't care. He wouldn't care. Marcus, it's been brilliant. Thanks so much and good luck with the podcast. Thank you so much. I'll bless you guys. Good luck with everything in life. Thanks man. And good luck with your flaxseeds. Let us know how you get on. Thank you so much, Marcus Brigstock.

Nice one fellas. Thank you. Thank you. Marcus Brigstock, I'm going to say it, I could not travel with him. Oh God. I'm quiet. Not a nerve, but I like a bit of time. I like to get early and relax. Lou, honestly, if we have a flight at 9 a.m., Lou ideally would want to leave at 2 a.m. in the morning. I just think there's so much more to lose than gain. Yeah, but imagine leaving your house. Perpetual motion. You never stop walking, you get on a plane.

What if something goes wrong? Josh, what if it all goes right? Ha ha ha ha ha ha! What a feeling. What if something goes wrong? Josh, what if it all goes right? What a feeling. What a feeling. There's always other flights. There isn't always perfection. I forgot you've got that No Fear poster up in your living room. Yeah, that is too much for me, especially with a kid.

Exactly. We'll be back on Tuesday. Yes, I'll see you there, Josh. Bye. Bye. Bye. ["The Star-Spangled Banner"] Hello, I'm Marcus Brigstock. And I'm Rachel Parris. This is How Was It For You, a review-based podcast.

We're going to be asking each other, how was it for you? It was pretty good, Rachel. About all sorts of different things. Things we've eaten. Things we've seen. Places we've been. Things we've smelled. People we've met sometimes. Those will be, we'll have to talk about them without

giving away who they were. And that will be the challenge you as a listener can enjoy. Exactly. You can get all of the episodes in the places where podcasts are.