Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - 6 Oofs In A Row

Episode Date: May 14, 2018

Luis J Gomez, Joe List and Rick Crom join Bobby for a killer ep! The aftermath of the coproducer Roast Battle goes down and Luis won’t stop touching Joe! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude on the Riotcast Network Riotcast.com Welcome to the funniest podcast on the planet Earth. This is gonna be a claustrophic. It's podcast, no rules. You're the my gas hall. I'm sure I've already said should I regret it? Can I get a microphone? No, that's a fuck.

That was trying to keep it like a comic head. I have a bunch of guys on. It's just us sitting down And sometimes it's hilarious. Sometimes it's having no topics. No directions. I love doing it Side to the coin Do you think my podcast is popular? I might affect somebody's life. You never know. You do ever kill these, you know what to podcast on whitecast.com. I'm in the uh, the old dog house. Why? How do you get a drink that I think are fun? Yes. I'm in the old dog house.

Why? My wife. Well, there was a bag of clothes with co-hangers sticking out of it on the floor in the living room for like weeks. And so I was like, you know, I'm going to take the initiative. My wife is very busy. She's working two jobs, the whole thing. So I went and I dropped it off at the Salvation

Army and it turns out it was her best clothing that was supposed to go to the dragon. Oh my God! I called today and I was like I got to get it back, my mother's wedding ring was in there, and then they were like no that's soft to the distributor, that's gone. Oh it's gone, yeah. You're like they don't, I thought when you donate clothes it stays in that store and they just put in the rack,'re like they don't I thought when you donate clothes it stays in that store And they just put on the like I was like don't even worry. I'll go get it back They're fucking they were like that went off to the warehouse. It's in you know Puerto Rico There's something like refugee wearing my wife's

$300 cashmere sweater first of all Puerto Rico. There's no refugees there. It's part of the United States Second of all but they refuse jeez from the storm there's probably the United States second of all but they refuse from the storm is that a refugee survivors of the story survivors are refugees but if you leave to go somewhere else you're a refugee are you not where do they go they come here a lot of come here people take in family like this refugees from Katrina that moved to Houston they can come here they're American citizens that doesn't that's not what refugee means. Yeah, refugee means a Cuba, a Cuban refugee. What's the word?

Somebody who's swam. A Cuban refugee is from Cuba. Yeah, somebody swam here on a fucking tire. What's the word I'm looking for? I think it's refugee. Like a person that, the people that, from New Orleans and moved to Houston, were traitor refugees. A refugee is a person who has been forced to leave their country

in order to escape a war persecution or natural disaster. Thank you. They're country, but that's our country. Yeah, that's our country. So it's not a refugee. They're not leaving their country to come to another country because they left Puerto Rico to come here, you fuck. That's a different country.

It's not? No, it's not. It is a different country. No, it's a US territory. Okay, so Puerto Rico is not a country. No, no, it's a US territory. It's a US. They have citizenship in the United States. They have citizenship. Yeah, making vote. So I can just move to Puerto Rico. Right. No. All right. Yes. Don't recommend it. The more you know, I wouldn't recommend it as full of refugees, but yeah. Aren't there also Speaking of Puerto Ricans Wooo! Puerto is a pile of some of the interesting things to happen Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha the Puerto Rican Rattles, come on, doggy. Listen, doggy, doggy. You got a new wire. What's the ones I gave you?

Throw them out? I think I lost them. Ooh, yeah. All right, let's go through the list, Mikey. Who's on the show today? Oh, we have the Puerto Rican Rattles, sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I just thought you knew that way.

We have the Puerto Rican Rattles, Nick, Lewis, Jay Gomez. Hello, Lewis, Jay Gomez. Hello, crackers. Are you hired? You just get punched in the face of a. Highest, 12. Crack, huh? Yeah. Hello, crackers. Are you hired? You just get punched in the face of a. Highest of 12. Crack.

Yeah. Yeah. Of course he's high. He's not even talking to the microphone. Just thinks we can hear him. Nope, your mic sure is a little hot, so I figured I'll step back a little bit. Use a little mic diction.

That's true. Mic diction. Mic diction. He was the coach of the bears in the 80s. And we have the truth, Joe List. Thank you. Joe List coming in with some fucking historical wrongness. But I was right about the definition of a refugee. Yeah, but we wouldn't call them refugees, dude.

We wouldn't. No, we wouldn't. I think we would. Well, they're seeking refuge, I mean, in the word. Thank you. Well, you don't have to live like one. And next to him, we have from the Oric documentary, we have Rick Chrome.

Oh, hi, everybody. Hi, man. I mean, in the word. Thank you. Well, you don't have to live like one. So and next to him, we have from the Oric documentary, we have Rick Chrome. Oh, hi, everybody. I thought you guys went to the future and got Dan Soder. I'm Dan Soder's Dan. Actually, I asked him to call me daddy. No luck yet.

I love it if you and Dan hooked up. Oh, it's a nice hot photo of Dan arching his back on a fucking twin bed. Two details, okay. A twin bed. Why is that being a twin bed? Because the furrier. Or twin is better than queen.

Okay, fold up. It would have been overdoing if I said queen. Yeah, redundant. Whoa, speaking of Dan last night, his episode of billions. Fucking great. I've never watched it. You don't watch a friend show.

I feel bad, actually, I was just talking to him. I was like, I gotta watch this show. It's a good show. I'm catching up on American Horror Story right now. I can't be bothered to bring another show into the rotation. I would be a phony if I just watched the show because my friend Dan was on it.

It's one of my favorite shows on TV. Right. I mean, and I had a big fight with Tim Dillon about this fucking show. And I take back, Tim was like, it's not the wire, it's not sopranos. It's up to, it's up to, well, you know, Tim, he's an idiot. He was like, your favorite show is definitely Cake Boss.

It was me calling you fat and Tim's voice. I know, but I'm not gonna laugh at it if he's not funny. I don't wanna give it to you yet. You don't deserve it yet. I just put this up there. I wanna let you want a little bit. Are you gonna keep that on the whole show? I gotta accept if you are. What is Bandilear? Yeah, it felt like... It's not a Bandilear.

You cock suckers. It's supposed to give me a Bandilear. It's a Bandilear. No, it's not a Bandilear. I got one for you. When you come to the party, I go, you can have it. It's a clutch purse. It's a man clutch.

Oh, a birthday party? Yeah. I'm coming. I'm coming. I'm coming. I'm coming. I'm band. The Lear. No, it's not a band. I got one for you. When you come to the party I go you can have it. It's a clutch purse It's a man clutch. Oh, Max birthday party. Yeah, I'm coming. I know you I got your invitation. I'll be there So anyways, I think it's one of the greatest shows on TV right now Max is right no the writing is amazing And I you know, you know, Tim was you want to pilot out of Max's birthday. That's pretty cool Tim He just did his joke that bombed

So it's go now you got it. It's all yours We diversity. What do you mean? I'm expert there. There is never I always have diversity there. That's what I'm saying It's so confrontational. I have you am I really being confrontational? I'm like, yeah, there'll be diversity like there will be diversity Well, cuz I was a scary thing to say to a white guy in 2018. I know, but I'm saying it genuinely. Do you think this is gonna be me too, sorry, Vex's birthday party? So anyways, we, ah, ha, ha.

I was on a joke, there was a serious. That's the worst idea of diversity. We got a black guy. We had sexual harassment. We got that. Oh my God, look at Gabby's head shot. Are you kidding me? Gabby, you're not that hot. Thank you. In real life, you know,by's head shot. Are you kidding me? Gabby, you're not that hot.

Thank you. In real life, you know, she's hot. She's very hot, but not the head shot. No, we argue the other day. Bring that back to us. She is hot, but I'm hot shot. We argue like tooth and nail. Well, you argue against it?

Yeah, she did. That's what I was going for. Come on. You know, why you don't think she's hot? No. Pretty. I would say she's pretty. She's hot.

But she's on. But she dressed, she dumbs it all down. She but she but she's on but she dressed she thumbs it all down She's not great. She wears this ridiculous on outfits You know what I mean these fucking you know she could dress she could Enhanced everything she has but she downplayed But that's the sign of a beautiful woman because she's not most insecure ugly women are trying to fucking put make up on make their Tits look good, you know not trying to look all fucking boxy and squared and boring, but Gabby doesn't give a shit. She just fucking goes for it, I love it.

She comes out and looks like somebody who sells flowers on the side of the room. The shirt is cool. It is cool. Who do you think is more attractive for their gender? Me or Gabby? Definitely Gabby. You're not even on the chart of fucking good looking.

Hey, you're even ugly mouth, and your fucking hairline goes way back yet. It's wrinkles in your forehead now. Just notice that. Joe, I think you're gorgeous. Thank you, Gabby. You're hot. I think you're smiling. You think you're smiling. You think Joe, this is gorgeous.

Yeah. Gorgeous. Thank you. You're looking me. You use the word, oh, it's the lyro arm. You, that's going on. Come on, I got this body. You guys are not laughing at Louie. He's coming in hot. I'm trying it hot.

You're always six, five, not much from them. You're going, you're doing good. I thought you came in with a good one. It takes five minutes for the room to adjust to the heat that I fucking bring. Before I came, before I came, they were talking about for, I said, I said, behind that current, for a full two minutes.

So, I'm talking about if Puerto Rico is a commonwealth or a country, it was boring. Doesn't it make me sick? I mean, doesn't make you sick that Lewis really is, has some intelligence because the fact that he knows commonwealth, we were just saying shit that we learned in fucking like second grade, this fucking Puerto Rican on the skateboard comes in stone. Dude, it's a commonwealth. What is a common well? I don't know but that's what it is. He's like the community college teacher you always wanted. Yeah. Just some fucking assholes. Dude if I was a teacher I would fuck my kids. I really would. Your kids are your students.

My students. My students. That big difference. There's no way if you were like a high school teacher because I would be a hot high school teacher. I'm not that good looking for like a man or like a dude. No, but high school teacher, I would be like Mr. Gomez, every girl would want to suck my dick and there's no way I wouldn't give into it. Really? Oh, 100%.

You wouldn't be able to give into it at all. Dude, fucking, nine, 10 years old, just fucking tight. What if it was a girl that looked like Lord? What if it was a girl that looked like Mike? Oh, Chris Hansen is here. What if it was an artist? What if it was a painting girl from the arts class upstairs? Look like Mike Kimmer was like,

I'd like to say a good day. Oh Chris, Mr. What's your name again? I have soft hair. You can go by Gomez, Mr. Gomez. If he says it with more confidence than anything he said in his roast battle last week. We gotta talk about this.

There's a couple of things we have to talk about. First of all, Rick Krohm has a movie out. Oh. Have you seen it? Anybody seen itom has a movie out. Oh, yeah. Have you seen it? Anybody seen it? I've seen it. You're in it. One night in Rick.

No. Which is a deal. That's a little bit. That's a Vietnamese boy from these village has that movie. It's on his iPhone. Sorry. Why I walk this way. Rick Chrom, meet Rick Chr Chrome, comedies, every man.

Oh, that's the best. Now, this came out. It's embarrassing, isn't it? It's not embarrassing. Tell us what the movie's about, Rick. Well, it's a documentary, you know, that our friend Dustin Susman did about, about me, my years at this cellar since 1984,

and it's kind of a history of the comedy seller and me, and in fact, I've done a lot of different things and kind of acts, exam is the question is, what defines success? Is it making lots of money, being famous, or is it doing what you love for eights for 30 years? Well, that was a good one too. I don't know how I did that,

but that was a top, that's how. I don't know. I have everyone who I know. Are you a top? Oh, yeah I'm tired of this of this rumor that I'm some sort of a bottom Never I'm I am a silver daddy with a lovely penis and lots of I agree I am just trying to attempt everybody in this room. I don't want a lot of I agree for guys fucking my one Be a soft and little bit and be like alright, it's not that bad You don't want a lot of back. If a guy's fucking, I want to be a softened little bit and be like, all right, it's not that bad. You don't want, you got too high

before this show. You're, because you're blinking. You're like this. No, I'm good. I'm good. I'm, I'm good. You're blinking. You can't stop blinking. Stop it. Keep your eyes open. There you go. Nice. That's what I say when I'm fucking somebody what nice keep your eyes open Please no I want to where can I see it? I didn't even know Rick Rump is gay into one night Maybe curly walks off he goes. Ah, this guy's gay. I go Rick's not gay. He goes what and he goes come here And he puts me in the room rickson the the piano going, you can sacrifice your sacrilege and in the back. I was not doing something from Gypsy. I was doing, I was doing my own song.

You're garrilin' I have to know that song. Well, we don't know that. I'm a bottom top. It's right. Very fluffy on the bottom. So this movie is about basically, I mean, do you have to be a Ray Romano or a Jerry Seifelt to be successful in this business? Sure.

Or can you be a Rick Chrome that's been around for 30 years and still around and then working the clubs and doing theater and doing all the stuff you love to do and do you have a Porsche? No. Do you have a mansion? No. How this goes on for 40 minutes? Do you have a savings account? A microwave.

No. But I do have a documentary. Do you have to drink soup twice a day? Do you have suicidal tendencies? Yes. Do you have to pay for dick now? Yes. Do you beat dead horses? That was fun. That's pretty good. That was really good. Smart for the room. You might be right. Yeah, just for the room. Dicks, Dicks, Dicks, and Anel and Farts.

Anyway, you see. I can do this his next album. Dick Anel Fart. Blu, blu, blu. Listen, first on by the way, I've never really done it that way. That's dope. You just thought you'd come up. What up, nigga mega oh my god

I don't know what we got a game we got a black it's great you're not blind I am after a break because you're still you got a man spread and then you're moving back what's your stuff in there you're fucking cuck liberal fucking bitch but you can't even make sense man spread tap it and touch it we have a great there's a lot of bumping over here I can't focus I'm sorry Man spread tap it in touch and we are there than Rick. All right Rick. Let's see his queer right there I said next to you. There's a lot of bumping over here. I can't focus. I'm sorry Rick You want to beat up this fucking queer with me? Come on. Let's do it You hold him down

Don't help Rick rape you. I hate you. That's not fucking bitch. I would do it polite You just went from zero to 60 there. It warms down. You fucking. I'm in. You fucking. He's just saying that you twist it a little bit. He's raping. You're raping him with a rhythm. Don't, don't ever cross me, dude. I'm gonna fucking rape you at Rick Rumb.

You're gonna be a party in prison. So anyway, Bob, Robert, Bobby, Bobby, from you're gonna be a party in prison So anyway, Bob Robert Bobby Bobby booby Bobby baby. Oh, sorry. That's just maybe last fucking cracker me up You would you call me a cock what? Cuck liberal bag, I think I'm glad Ricky. What are you talking about speaking of liberals? Oh I'm only one of those things. Yeah. So anyway, just a long story short, we're, we're, uh, the movie's done. You've seen the movie when festivals now, we,

one of your awards, Doc and my see, we're going to be the so-ho film festival. That's coming up. And then, uh, and we're doing a big event a week from today at the, uh, at the village underground, Rick Romer friends, just to raise awareness of they, they're doing a go fund me effort for the, uh, Rick Romer-France, just to raise awareness of they're doing a go-fun me effort for the licensing funding and things like that. So now is this, is this, where did, what, what is this film go? What is the life of this film?

You've done the festivals, it's been out for a year now, and where do you want to go? And I've been in that many places. It's only been like three or four years. I try to get it on Netflix. Yeah, but you got to, you got to cover the licensing. There's a lot of film clips in the thing that needs to be covered.

You need to pay for all this stuff. You need to pay for that first. You might make it back in the back end, but you got to pay for it. How much, how much money you looking to rent? I think they're looking to raise about 80,000. 80 fuck! Sorry.

I think. I know. I know, because of the rolling stones music That Louis lip-a-chip cheap. Why do you have to fucking pay for that? Why can't Louis just give it to you? He can't he doesn't Oh, I guess fired. I don't think he's Why not for Louis? I don't know I don't know the the finances the last time Louis just gave something to somebody I'm not

He asked and they said no and he said okay, and then they fired him and then how do you like that? Yeah, all right But anyway, I felt in the joke. I'm sorry. It's okay. I tried to help you out of it But then I sometimes these things fucking have but we take chance to do with my plug then we can fun no This is what we do the plug yeah we just go in and out of it on the show but the people listen and let's have a look at our is this a trailer for it right here or is this the movie uh there is a trailer on the website can we watch the trailer how long can we you mind checking it's a minute and a half I would love to see it on the website the full

movie and that is the website so scroll down if you can and it should be a or maybe it's only on the facebook one okay okay let's see if the truck i actually saw the movie it's a great movie and you know it's so funny because we all uh... who made that is that what's his name make that what that that drive yeah uh... i don't know says some friend of dust and did it and that the first one

they did i was like was a picture of me 30 pounds heavier The thing on the people to see how take it off. Huh? Zach will take it off, but they're watching live. It's not on there right now. Okay. They're not stupid He trusts them a little bit. Imagine they came in and they like get the set of jokes What he did we're gonna get to the ass I literally thought he was gonna be dead today. I thought we were gonna come in and we're gonna be memorial. We were close.

Because he comes. We were close. Risk. We were close. But he pulled it out. Oh, Rick, now do you have to pay for licensing for stealing the comedy solo logo? No, we just swiped it.

Oh, okay. There it is right there. Make it big first. I don't know. You want to watch this whole thing? How long does it sit? Two minutes. I'd like to see it. You want to watch this whole thing? I don't know. How long does it take? Two minutes. I'd like to see it. Two minutes to kill on the show.

Two hour podcasts. We need to stretch. Yeah. Well, we don't need to stretch. No, not that interesting. Ready? Let's see. I don't know. It embarrasses me to watch. I'm a realist. Tell me the truth.

I know. You realize, fuck it. This is going to make me a random thing. Hit it. It's buffering. It's buffering it's buffering yeah Scott one second did I clip across a lot of months stop one second who what happened to him can we do the next idea can we do the next documentary on whatever this guy's name is have no idea what his name is this was 1990 or

91 showtime comedy club network this is showtime that we know today. Yeah. So this is almost like like a like a five people on the show, two people like they would do they would do a special with comics and different clubs all over the country. And then they'd splice it all together for a show. Where is where are you doing this? This is Rex Riches in New York, which was on 53rd Street. I don't know if you remember Rex. No, I do not. It's before your time. Was it a famous club like the comedy seller? Yeah, it was it wasn't as famous as the seller, but it was right up there with, I think they were in business for like almost 10 years. Really? I did a New Year's Eve there, opening for Jerry's Seinfeld. Wow. And like the 90s. He was before his show.

So you were the original Ryan Hamilton. Yeah, but they paid, they were paying Jerry, uh, 20, $25,000 for the night and I was making a hundred. So, you know, 100 dollars for the night. You heard it here first. Jerry Seinfeld is a cheap Jew. No, he didn't pay. He could have kicked you back a grand easy.

He could have, he could have. How much did he get paid again? 25,000. Wow. Get out He could have, he could have easily. How much did he get paid again? 25,000. Wow. Put out of my face, Rick. Beat it. All right, let's watch the matter. That's what I heard.

That's what I heard. We're going to compose a ringlaces. Put your hands together for Mr. Rick Chrome. Rick Chrome. Oh my god. Rick Chrome. Rick Chrome, everybody. You ask people to know what they do

and think of what they need done. Looking out for you. Rick is a, what we call, I guess you can say, he's an amodeous type, you know, the mad genius. I owe a lot of what he need done. Look at how he's doing. Richard's a, what we call, I guess you could say he's an amodest type, you know, the mad genius. I owe a lot of material to Rick Crom. Rick could do a jokes to go off the host's shell, but he could also write funny songs. All he had to do is hear Rick at the piano, belt out a note in this Broadway style.

This guy's like the real deal. Tevis kind of the face of the seller, him and Bill Runfest, obviously. Still, to this day, the best regular MCs have ever seen in a comedy club. Rick was like ready to have his own variety shows smooth. The thing that amazes me is he's not a household name that everybody knows. I was trying to be an entertainer. I wasn't trying to be a comedian that changed the world. Do I ever have my own TV show?

No. Was I ever on the tonight show or the letterman show? No. If you work hard, you get where you get and some people get here and some people get here and that's the part that you can't figure out. Life is long, so we'll see what happens with Rick You're fucking 40 years of row working who doesn't Jack Nicholson Al Pacino Rick chrome, I don't know what this called, but I think here's a title Rick chrome long overdue Oh Rick. Oh Rick. Oh Rick. Oh

Ricky Rick oh Ricky Oh god, free. Yeah, he never he never doesn't overdo it, huh? Even along there That was a great. I want to watch this amazing leave that up. It looks really cool. Yeah, does it automatically Amazing leave that up right it looks really cool. Yeah, I'm God But he over he over does it but he gets the last motherfucker on that little clip Keith is black What did you have a stroke you didn't see him?

Hello folks was that before stroke Keith or after stroke Keith? Oh before wow Hello folks, was that before Stroke Keith or after Stroke Keith? Ah, before. Wow. I thought it was after. Yes, here's that. He was all stiff. That's the only way they could keep moving under two hours.

So this movie's out there. Are you, can I ask you a question? Sure. Are you, are you happy? Are you, are you okay with your success? Yeah. Or do you still chase that in your brand? Do you still want your own show?

Do you still want maybe to be the guy getting the $50,000 for a new year? Do you want to be the, all these people that you had in there, I mean the Billy and the Ray Romano, blah, blah, blah, do you want that still? Or you, I'm just happy where I'm at. Well, you have to be happy with where you're at.

I mean, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, because otherwise I'd be, I can always discont I'm at. Well, you have to be happy with where you're at. I mean, because otherwise I'd be always discontent. But, you know, I don't know, I'm not Ray Romano, I'm not Bill Burr, I'm not that good. Not them. What do you mean you're not that good? Well, I mean, I'm not on their level in terms of the things that they do. I do so many different things, you know, between the Broadway and the comedy and the songwriting and the acting and stuff like that. I'm happy doing all those other things. I have a scale at which I'm doing them. Right.

Sure, I love one of them to take off. You know, I'd like to be a regular on a TV series and all that stuff. Right. I was going to be a regular on House of Cards this season, but... Really? Are you really? I was. Where were you?

I was. What were you going to do? I was playing a lawyer. I brought back a character I did three seasons ago. And I went down to Baltimore, shot a lovely scene with Robin Wright in the Oval Opera scene. Right. She spent that beautiful. And then two weeks later, the scandal broke. All that work got canceled. You know, so I too have been fucked by Kevin Spacey. Wow. Hashtag I too. I too. Me too. But you know.

That's fucking sucks. No, no, that's the business, you know. You never know. That's fucking, but you get your medical after that. That's fucking a C. For a year, yeah. For a year? That's a lot of money.

A lot of money, I know, I'm paying like $1,000 a month and I'm fine. Jesus Christ. How about that? That's what being 61 does. Oh, you're 61? $1,000 a month. Yeah. That's great. Thank you very much. Cross, you and Vos are the same age. That's that's what being 61 does it oh your 61 a thousand dollars a one. Yeah, great. Yeah, thank you very much

Cross you and boss of the same age. That's right. That's right. Jesus Christ. I died my hair like he does I mean said I don't I don't die it. What's that he goes like this? What's die? What's your that's your defense you're claiming you don't know what hair dye is But he's in great shape though. He's a great guy. Physically. Yeah, not career wise. Emotionally. Emotionally is not.

Well, dude, I hope you raise 80 fucking grand. It's amazing with these clips cost. The true time clip probably cost a few grand. Wow. You can't just ask them to donate it. You can't, the goal can't the goal fund. Yes, and they say no. Yeah, but couldn't just ask them to donate it. You can't, the goal, can't the goal fund. Yes, and they say no. Yeah, but couldn't the goal fund me?

Look, man, give me this for free. Yeah, no. Yeah, you're good, I suppose you could. So after you. I'm not involved in that kind of, that part of the production, I'm good. So this could go to Netflix. Sure.

What have you sold at the showtime? So you can just have that. Yes. That would be nice. I'm all for it. Yeah, they're he's 70-7,000 dollars If only one of us had like a dad with a lot of money. I love math jokes That joke had to be for 77. There's the only way that was funny I'm a real pro one day of a documentary about me you will know maybe hang around with Kill Lewis Gomez Alright, we done with this segment. It's great. Rick's awesome, but let's fucking sort of call on each other gay and fags and fucking the end word and can we get moving? What are we doing here?

I always like it. Why don't you like, I like his documentary, but I'm telling you right now the fucking fans are going they turned off the show they're not going to like him anymore because you're fucking inside the actor studio. They didn't like it the first time. I think that he is cool as you. Take control of the fucking ship with a star person. I've never seen you done you sick of it. I like a guy that uses the N word and then later says N word Yeah, you fucking dirty

Spick Why don't you have the same nobody cares why why does that not have the same? Puerto Rican zone cool Hispanic people don't really give a fuck. We are too busy dealing with black people. Don't even give a fuck about the N word. It's just fucking crackers. It's people like Gabby. What? Yeah.

Why me? Why not Joe? Have you ever said the N word? No. Ever. No. In your life. No.

Let the air out of the tires. Because you say it right now, then you're like, holy shit. Now I don't feel all that animosity every time a black's around. I never know. That's why I say so much. You guys all hold it inside. I hate feel all that animosity every time a black surround. I never know That's why I say so much You guys all hold it inside and then I say it every day a few times So then when I'm around black some like you guys are just people like me Let you all follow you fucking queers have it You've never said

Why would I lie? I don't think it's a bad thing. Don't be pressured into saying it from this fucking I feel no pressure. Yeah, look at this fucking asshole. Can we we end word cherry? Can we sing fun? Joey songs but replace some of the words with the N word. I don't know what you mean Whoa Halfway there. Whoa Neger run a prayer. It's, that was an E-R. And we're canceled. It's on my hand and we'll take it, I swear.

Mike just left because he doesn't like the N word, actually. He really does get offended with it. Yeah, that was an E-R version. His, yeah, I didn't like that. It was really terrible. What? That song. I was in bad. What are some other songs? I don't like that it was really terrible what that song I was embedded what are some other songs I don't remember any songs but you don't remember a bungey song you're not fucking why let me think shot through the hot and you're too blame you gave love a new girl you try to change your voice

so when they come and get you later. New gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, gun, new gun, new gun, new gun,

gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, gun, gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, gun, gun, new gun, new gun, gun, new gun, new gun, gun, gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, new gun, gun, gun, gun, new You're not black and the end word and then and then we can't even use this footage now You have to cut it out. All I know is show to us. Tell you what you completed the hills are alive with the sound of Now I'm safe and he's the one taking the blood. I will do this

We'll do a podcast together off this premise Go on Now whether the fans all their ears perked up tuned in Ricks back in their fucking graces. They're gonna buy a going right now. What else you got Rick? Now whether the fans, all their ears, parked up, tuned in, ricks back in their fucking big graces. They're going to buy his documentary right now. Garren fucking teethe. That's he still document. What else you got?

Maria, I just met a girl named Maria. She's a dirty niggah. No, no, no, no. That's a nice guy. That's a nice guy. Never said that. She has Puerto Rican, you right? She's a dirty spick.

It's fucking kid. How about this? Yeah, good job. Never said she has Puerto Rican you right? This Afro-pixen sneakers He's our a few of my Favorite Just supposed to be the one word and the things I'm not a good comedian. We know. We know. This is really.

I mean, we're going to, we can't put this out. You're going to be shocked to fuck the bitch. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out.

It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. We're gonna cook liberal Joe list Everything we say from here. I know it's also gonna be criticized so we can't even make a regular fun You know a reverent joke now. I am You know I invited Lewis on the show when you invite Lewis on you that's it Here that you are inward 40 times. He said it every show. He's ever been fucking on 40 times he said it every show he's ever been fucking on Before skanks before my before you and Tuesdays before Gabby's fat lips and Mike's mushy face Before Rick fucking even started fucking young Asian boys He was on this show using the N word so don't stop acting surprised, you know he know hitting change the fucking world change

No, he changed no, he's changed. No, he's changed. No, I didn't change. Show you changed It doesn't right skateboards now if I can change we all can change you guys start making out now It's gonna be so no the changes his chubby way size which bugs me It does change. Oh, there was a point where I was underneath him and he got mad And then we're back into the fucking gym. That's a lie There was it was one point where he hit wow, I went boom and it was like fuck you and we wait we didn't need to go below me What you were I was within like 20 pounds of you and that was too much. No, I was I was below you your five six I was below you. I'll below you right now. I'm five eight. I'll below everybody I'm Joe my making uncomfortable. No, is this why you don't answer my calls about Legion of Skanks anymore?

I did restart in your call. Yeah, there it comes. I was trying to get you as a guest for a while. I did respond. That's bullshit. I'm unavailable that way. Because Legion of Skanks is fucking too little, too harsh for Joe list. Wow.

Are you, have you listened to our podcast? Hollywood Joe. Wow, Hollywood Joe. And Hollywood showbiz. Showbiz Joe. He's really going to Hollywood. That's true. He's too ugly for Hollywood. He's not ugly. We stop calling him ugly

I don't like that. I'm not in Hollywood several times. Maybe you've so is cute. He's cute like a doll. Thank you Gabby you're very pretty. Thank you. Gabby you're blotchy. She is very white. Am I blotchy right now? Yeah, you blotchy It's a bad. I blotchy so easy. Well, you get it. Can you do it? Can you tan? No, no, no, no, no, no That's me as can I see you Can we look like she smells good? Want your smeller doesn't smell like she looks smelly. Yeah, can he smell you? Yeah, good Why'd you see that dirty? I okay, don't be weird though. What have this is okay. Just smell me don't touch me though

But you what does she smell like like just fucking like a dirty white girl? It's like a fucking unshoured bitch. You haven't showered. I showered this morning. You did you did you you didn't wait You hear though. Did you wash your hair? No, no, no, that's why what do you mean? You don't wash your hair? You don't wash your hair every time you do it twice, that's why. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, the new Fag? You know, Cuck is a guy who watches a man, fuck his wife. Well, no, but is it, don't be, aren't people? Aren't people, aren't you? I was using to this whole thing.

I don't know what it is. But aren't people using Cuck as the new Fag? So you can't say, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I said, yeah. So you can't, you can't, so you can't say, yeah, Fag or it's boring. Yeah, you fucking Cuck. Isn't that it?

Isn't that what you're really saying? It's got to see, it's got a K. Yeah, go up. You calling Joe a fag? Kind of. Yeah. Yeah, it's the same word essentially. He's just a little bit, he's a little bit.

Country? Oh, it makes me think you'd lick that song rock over there. It stinks. All right, all right, what are we doing next? I don't want to think of you listening Toby Keese that bums me out. Why? Cause you're like, How do you like me now?

I think with this... This fucking moron's getting 90 podcasts. He's like, alright, let's move on. We'll move on when I fucking move on. I think we should move on. We'll move on when I move on. Shut your fucking face. There's no potential in that.

Nobody's saying N word or fucking talk about eating each other's assholes. He's all fucking bored. I'm just kidding about that. I don't even say the N word. Yeah talk about any chiles assholes. He's all fucking bored. I'm just I'm kidding about that I don't even say the N word. Yeah, you just said it 90 times you fucking dirty Guy If I had balls I would have said it I don't use that word anymore either here's a root here's a problem with the N word we get it you can say it but who but you should Who cares? I don't think white people should be able to say it.

But who cares about the N word? Who cares if people say it or not? I don't give a shit. You shouldn't want to say the N word. If people like ads, I don't want you to use that. Just don't fucking use it. No, it's like if somebody puts a button in front of you and says, don't push that button.

You're like, well, now I want to fucking push that button. So that's what's happening in society right now. And now you have an outlet like Reddit and YouTube. And now you can push that button all day long with no accountability stupid Most intelligent thing I've ever said on the show I think the Puerto Rican thing was the most intelligent thing but I I don't think I just think it's stupid to want to do something because you can do it

I don't I'm not all right. Don't do that. All right. Whatever. I agree with not doing it I won't do it. I need to do it because I'm not oh You're not supposed to do it. So you do it. I won't do it. I need to do it because I'm not oh, you're not supposed to do it So you do it that's retarded. Yeah, but then you're in your car and you're driving to a black neighbor and somebody jumped from your car Then you say it for real. You're not saying it jokingly or in a joke. You're the beginning of the bet You went too fast. What'd you say when you're in your car and you have road rage and some black dude jumped to front of your car And you call him the n-word, you know, not to his face, but fucking with the music blaring

Into your shoulder blade. That's not the first thing that comes to my mind when a black eye walks in front of my car on the n-word, you know, not to his face, but fucking with the music blaring, uh, into your shoulder blade. That's not the first thing that comes to my mind when a black eye walks in front of my car. It's the first thing that comes to my mind anytime I see a black person. Is it really? No. Oh.

It's wrong with you. What did you say when you hit that Mexican last week? What I say? Want to hit the Mexican? Yeah. Icaramba. I. Did Candy come out of him I said

Who's I'm fired I I said I don't know what I say I said Mike I well when I saw him I said sorry. I was like what the fuck? I've come to figure it out, he hit me. Look, you can't, how do I hit somebody with a side of my car? I mean, I was making a U-E on 72nd, and the bike guy hit my car. Oh, it was a biker.

Deliverious, Lenny sub delivery guy hit my car. And it was just a tap, whatever you heard it was, and he didn't even damage my car. He came into my car, and I didn't hit him. If I hit him, you know, maybe we hit each other. But anyways, it was a Mexican dude. So I just assimilate. That's my go-to defense mechanism.

When I have interactions with anybody, I turn into a Mexican. That's when I see, I said, Mita, Mita, Mita. I like game of 50. You guys just slept on a street corner together for a couple hours and he's yesterday. He's okay.

He's okay, Mita, Mita. He's okay, you also think he's a lot. I love you, man. I have salsa in my car. He has tacos. Bobby has tacos in his car, actually. Yeah, I know, but I don't, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha except faggot. No, that's not true. Faggot. Faggot is not as bad as Nigger. What do you say? I say if it comes from this, they're not as dangerous anyway.

No, no, no. I'm good. Not anymore. If it comes from the same place, it becomes the same thing. I'm going to dehumanize you by calling you a word. Then it's the same thing. Hold on.

But let me say this. What if it's like, I'm calling Joe Lissifaggot? That's not the same thing as me calling it gay dude. Yeah, I know, but the terms have changed. Yeah, you're wise. You're able to say, I'm going to call I'm going to call you a bag and someone to emasculate you. Yeah, right. Because that's what guys do locker room talk that. But it changes. I mean gay, I mean, I mean, fact, fact, then, then people like, well, what's the difference then? Right. So, so the, the reality is, listen, I'm totally, I understand what you're saying

because I grew up with that kind of thing. But the, the, the the yeah, the word is change. You can't say retarded and I'm He said faggot. Yeah, but you said faggot. Yeah, but I grew up on the Jersey Shore and we said Faggot and retarded yeah, but that you can't use But we're real trash. Well, what wasn't trash too? There's also a lot of retarded faggot in the Jersey Shore That's what we have our home. Hey, with them, let me duck your dick. Yeah, but you're talking about, uh, I'm doing characters guys. Come on. Look, how many characters did I do today? The fuck on the Tartar Fag? That's great. The duck your boy look really d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d- You really make a gentleman comfortable today. Well, it's brutal. I'm getting knocked over here. I'm getting tapped every minute It's like this you open his mouth

Those his legs are doing this the whole show for the record. I haven't touched him once I'm the one behaving Ricks of the brutal did you see SNL this weekend when they did that get about retarded, the dirty talk? They did a retard sketch on the show. Oh yeah, dirty talk. Melissa. Yeah, she said the word retarded and he was like, no, no, no, no, you can't say that anymore.

I mean, you really can't use the word retarded at all. What do you mean? People get fucking offended with the word retarded. No, you can't use it. Like, you can't. You can't use any. I said, I said, it's gonna make it funny. It's almost, you're taking a chance.

How do you make retarded funny now? Now, I know how you do it. I'm just asking, watching it right now. That's what Siggur got in trouble for, though. You lucky. What do you get for? Literally Mike went like this. Good. That was a laugh you got. I said it like a dead person laughing in the room. So you're a gotten trouble for the he like what do you get he like he literally Mike went like this good

That was a laugh you Said like a dead person laughing in the room. I don't like me to say to no I think the spirit is somebody left But but Sakura getting trouble. That's like a relative turn. I mean, yeah But he doubled down. I didn't know what happens. This is why I secure as fun. It's figure as funny He doubled down on it. He went and said fuck it and he made more jokes about But he literally didn't get in trouble. He got in trouble with people on the shit net. Yes.

He got people waiting at him. Right. But people, that's not, what are you gonna say? It's not what? That's not trouble. He loses something. Are you crazy? Nick DePaul just lost his fucking job. You're doing something. Nick DePaul's trouble. But because of, but because of Twitter, but if he, what are are they gonna take from them? They tried to take that's my point But they tried to get Netflix to take a special off. Yeah, it just didn't work

But they fucking tried right and we don't know how close they were just smashing their fingers into the keyboard They couldn't get through to anybody. That's my point is he didn't do it Ricky can't if laugh, you're out. It's over. But that's the thing. We have a sense of humor. The very fact that you're saying the word that you're not supposed to say, that's the joke. Oh, look, I said the word that I'm not supposed to say.

Surprise, that's the laugh. But you can't buy this. It's hard to never get that with an audience. Well, it's funny to somebody. It's funny. But that's the other thing right now as well, because I think that sometimes, sometimes people go like, oh, well, it's just easy to say that to shock somebody, but you're right, because the audience in a stand-up comedy club, in most environments, they're not reacting.

When you say word like retard, faggot, nigger, onstage in a stand-up club, it is a huge risk. At this point, it's not an easy laugh. Nobody's going, oh, this guy's fucking saying, Faggot, it's really difficult. I've had to change words in my act because it didn't work. Yeah. I, Faggot was a word that I had in a joke that I literally can't say anymore because it doesn't work.

Retard him saying, it's different though. Retard, you can go left off pretty easily. What, why did you change that though? Because I'm trying to make, I'm trying to kill. It's my job to do as well on stage as possible, not to shock people, not to, now I like talking about fucked up shit. and that's the comedy that's always made me laugh. But it's... But it's easy though, because, I mean, you say, what was the context in the word,

Faggot that you were using? Um, I was talking about what I care if my son was gay, and then I call... It's just a bit where my dog starts humping another male dog, and I call the other dog, a Faggot dog. What do you call him now? Gay dog. You should call him, and it doesn't get the same bag of dog. What do you call him now? Gay dog. You should call him again. It doesn't get the same laugh.

No, laughs, it's not gonna. It gets a harder laugh because it shifted at one point. What about homo dog? That's fine. Actually, I have fucked with homo dog. All right. I said, Faggot, and my Netflix half-art, and not one person.

You just said it in the mirror before you got a sage. But I said it. I was telling a story about somebody calling me at Faggot in high school. So I think it's- It didn't mean nothing to me. You can do it. I'm sorry. I'm trying to give it to you.

Yeah, not one person was upset. I thought it was a good one. It was fucking out bag. I could just put you to go to baguette. Does anyone like this? Um, what the fuck? Sorry, I was saying a different thing. I said something and then we were responding to each other.

You were having a nice little talk. Blow it through it. It's like it's work. See. It's like it's work. See, it's like it's work. I just think that you shouldn't get so fucking crazy about somebody joking. If somebody's intent was to joke, then who the fuck are you to say,

if somebody wants to joke about this or that, and if a black guy wants to use the N word, and if a white guy wants to say retard, and if somebody wants to say faggot, and they're trying to joke about this or that and if a black guy wants to use the N word and if a white guy wants to Retard and if somebody wants to say Faggot and they're trying to joke and have fun and not fucking, you know They're not trying to wipe out a race of people or you know Whatever then fucking shot the fuck up no promises. How about I was just watching the office the American office season two Whatever year that was 2003 or for it They did a whole episode where Michael calls the gay guy Faggy and they say Faggy like 50 times I got in trouble like you could do that now I got in trouble for Faggy at a college and a week before Dame

Was there who used the word Faggot as his closing bit and they came into me and they were like yeah We're we really upset with you saying Faggy And I'm like why because it's you know You really heard some people's feelings and there was some gay students and Faggot was Dan Cook here here the week before the yeah I go wasn't his last bit you're a faggot yeah I go faggot is not as bad faggy is not as bad as faggot I go I don't know what you're talking about I don't know why they're why one's okay one isn't you know it's because of you don't like it's it's it's people who's saying it, and who's getting offended by it.

Because it was me and I'm a fucking bald guy from Boston and I'm not as cute or whatever. No, I think it's a level of fame. Well, it's that too, a level of fame, but it's because of the person saying it, whatever reason it is. It's like, But now it's reversed.

The higher the level of fame, the more offensive it is. Yeah. Now and unknown, none of us, no one in the industry should about any of us saying this very interesting Strait of fucking you know, that's true Bob Dylan came out and said bag it people would be up in arms unless it was sang it Faggot Bob Dylan song

We don't know Rick ever give me Bob Dylan song. I'll see if we throw a bag it in there something blowing in the wind See if we throw a faggot in there something blowing in the wind That's just I'm just blowing in my car I'm a car I'm a car I don't see the thing I've got it. Where do you think I want to take these boys? Get in the car Get in the car I'll give you a 50

50 It's all cost for a guide blow jump Time's as hard Jesus man If I put time in a faggot That's not Bob Dylan. Oh, that's Jim Croci. Jim Croci. Yeah. Pretty good.

So good song. Great song. I just know, I mean, you, but here, the thing with you though, you say whatever you want, you all the time podcast, you never hold back. You know, give a fuck down, down, to dump. But in your, but in your act, you made a change because

because it's my job to, it's my job to read the room and stand up as it, it's a much different thing is it, you know, there because it's my job to, it's my job to read the room. And stand up is it, it's a much different thing. Is it, you know, there's different forms of fun. So stand up is your job to read the room and kill in that room. They're paying you to kill. Eventually, you sell your own tickets, you have your own fans coming, then your fans are sort of expecting, then it's almost like you're paying yourself to kill.

So then it sort of doesn't matter. But on a podcast, a little different. I mean, we just kind of, we just can't say different thing too. Like, I'm fucking around here on this one, but typically, I don't just fucking say the N word to say the N word or say, Faggot, say, Faggot. Like, you know, I'll try to at least be funny with it or have it within context. But why do you do? Why are you doing it on here as a? Well, I don't understand. Well, I was being funny. I was doing it. I was overusing it here. For funny.

Yeah. Yeah, but overusing it as much as I've used it here is the funny part here. Right. But what I said at once, it wouldn't have been that funny. Right. Gotcha. It would have been just real.

Yeah. Right. Yeah, just the context. It's like, how do you mean it? Does he mean it? Because he's, I've said it so many times. The joke is that I'm saying. Yeah, exactly.

Yeah, yeah. But I don't think it's a context thing. But I think, look, I don't think if you, if you, like, Gabby, the fact that she's never used it, I think it's great. This because she's got that goofy voice too. It would be too much. That muppet voice. Oh my God, all these blacks.

You know, you know, you think that's a great thing that people aren't going to use that, like, this generation. Yes, I don't think anybody should use the word. I think that's going to be phased out. Free TARD, Faggett, Nigger is all going to be phased out free-tard, faggot, nigger is all gonna be phased out. Trump's America, yeah. Yeah. But, how's he going?

Why is the, I mean why are we not fucking lavin' it that much? I don't think I get it. I'm not gonna. I'm gonna phase out. I just said gazebley, he's gonna phase him again, try to figure out how to be gone. I didn't get it. I thought you meant the word. That's why I didn't understand it. I thought it was nonsensical. I know it's a tell you a little. Try it. I mean. the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasem again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasemal again, the phasem Yes, let me know cut his mic and He wanted to do like dominant submissive roleplay and he wanted me to use that word on him right?

Yeah, you want to me to call him now we're getting somewhere and I so and I wouldn't do it Retort I don't know I just couldn't do it. I've been so I thought L. Sharpton would come out of the closet any second and I thought El Sharpton would come out of the closet. I need a second and three some No, I don't become out of the room Why I couldn't do it. Yeah, I wouldn't be into that either. I know I could do that I can't humiliate somebody like that. So what he wanted you to be like a slave owner Yeah, yeah, something like that really She had to be like boy go in the other woman take your back out. I don't think you want me to say Well, I said I said I said you did not pick enough kind this week

Now you see that big mumba jamba come on my chin Now you motherfucker, oh you're gonna get three lations Exactly that's exactly what it wanted me to say. Now on every last drop of dead gym in Kappa. Oh, look at this one here. He's a big old stallion here. I feel like you've got a top dollar for this one. I feel like Bobby got several callbacks on a slave owning part at one point and did some

studies really nailing it. I mean, I just don't know. That'd be so fucked up. He wanted you to be like just a racist guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I think it was a lot of people that had to pretend to understand it, but I'm.

Because here's a problem with that. I didn't do it. Because if you do it, here's the problem with that. If you do it, and then you get to into it. And then there's one point. He's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, chill. Or even a court must racist thing you said today. Don't go, chill son.

Yeah. Then I usually somewhere else, I'm going to be saying, like, hey, you can't use a word. I, go chill son. Then I can use it somewhere else. I'm gonna be like, hey, you can use it. But I say, no, no, this black guy was fucking, just told me I could. He's okay, I gotta pass. God forbid something happens, you neighbor, just hears you. Yeah. Oh boy.

I get the humiliation thing. That would you, is it because of that word or was it just humiliating somebody? So let's say there was Another guy another guy was like I want you to fucking smack me in the face and throat fuck me until I cry Let's do that. Well, that's a date But yeah, no, there's there's that whole thing. I want you to humilate me call me names I don't understand myself, but isn't it so you don't like you're not into that. No I want you to humilate me, call me names, I don't understand it myself.

But isn't it, so you don't add into that? No. So you're a lover. You're a lover. I'm a lover. Right, you're a lover. You're a top lover. I'm a top lover and I'm pay for dinner.

Yes, I'm better. Pay for dinner? Like a falafel or a full like, a appetizer? Depends on where we are. Depends, yes. Jersey City. I have. I don't know.

Then a snow cone I don't understand I mean who's who's it was an inter-be humiliated here. There's got to be one thing I'd be into that Yeah, really spit my mouth. I used to love that spit on my mouth. Do not spin act me around a little bit Make me yeah, but if somebody can hit your mouth with spit they went a prize Unbelievable If somebody can hit your mouth with spit they win a prize Unbelievable aim I Joe's gonna come out. I'm gonna make the mic thinner. Oh, buddy, Jesus Christ, that made me laugh.

I don't like being humiliated. I try to be dominant, and I like when a girl is a little dominant, but when they get, there's always that point where they do, they get too into it, and they'll say something, I'll scratch my face, and they'll say something, I'll scratch my face and then I'm like, hey, cut the fuck and I get, fuck as your problem, relax.

And I take over and I'm, and they're like, that's what I wanted. I had a girl one time who wanted me to choke her, but then would come to her senses and then wanted me to choke her again and then be like, I'll just start crying and I go, and I'll be like, are you okay? I said, no, I like it, I like it.

And I be like, she keep doing it. I was like, I gotta go. I'm not doing this shit. This is to whatever you're doing, tears should not be involved. You gotta both be responsible. I'm not by it, I think. I've had chicks who've done weird shit.

Tricks are into violent sex, I can't get into it. It doesn't turn me on. I can get a chick who's into smacking me. Look, a little bit of smacking, a little bit of light fucking. He bruises her ass a little bit, you smacker. You know, hit her in the ribs a little. I guess crack her in the shot. Make her go. Yeah.

Yeah. But it's a deliver. You know, that's it. No, but if it turns you, you know, it's got a sort of term both of you on. Smack that coccyx. I would rather be dominant than dominated. I can't be dominated. I could do it for a second.

Even though I like weird shit, like I like what a chick, you know, fucking sucks my dick from the back door. What? You mean around the. I like to get on all sorts of things. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh my dick in between my legs and just burp that metal. Yeah, yeah. You know?

That's hot. I like a wet blowjob too. But I don't like wet, I don't like wet. Who wants a dry blowjob? Well some girls just go, he he he. You know what I mean? Some girls just spit on it and wet it and choke on it. I don't know comment.

Gabby, what do you do? No comment. I'm gonna say, I'm gonna be writing notes over here for this good You gab no Mike. What do you do? My hands mostly on a hand work. I like a lot of hand work. What do you mean like fingers? No, you gotta eat fucking Extend the two blowing guys He'd be talking to me, but that's a good technique by the way. Let me tell you something right now. I will fucking go down in history. I the one of the best blow jobs I ever got in my life was from Lewis Gomez. We share. I was joking. I was telling me because when I married Joe List, I said I

I put his name in it just shits and giggles to see how committed Lewis was. I went Lewis Gomez and he went J. It made me so happy. I caught my wedding. Lewis was. I went, Lewis Gomez and he went, Jay, in the middle of a wedding. It made me so happy. I tackled my wedding. Lewis B.J. Gomez. Yeah. I hate it. Yeah, best blowjob ever.

Literally, I mean, he gave, you gave me head that I love. Yeah. Loved his head. That's something a Bon Jovi song. The fact that he went like this right on the tip, Puh. Oh.

Two fingers stroked down. And then fucking, all the hand reached in, grabbed me. And for the listeners that never, you know, listened to that show or saw the video, and we should explain that it was not actually your dick. And it was a man your brother. You ruined it.

It was a rubber dildo. Wasn't me actually sucking his dick. Where's my dicks? Up, up. That's what he says every time he draws the pee. This was the dick right here. This is the dick that looks like it. The actual size.

That's good. It was good. It's a pretty small dick, right? That's the dick, right? I think that's a fine sized dick. That looks perfect. It's a good right here. Is that a fine sized dick?

That's a fine sized dick. That is. It's a unique dick. It's a moderate, it's a keeper. It's a unique deck. It's a moderate keeper. It's not a keeper. You're not going to throw that back. You want it slightly thicker. How about this one?

That's too big. A little better? That's too big. Yeah, that one. For me, that's again, as a top, I'm not taking that one. It is a Lister. How much Lister? I got that.

That was from my Christmas Grab. It's a cane. It's a water gun. Or a water gun or a come gun. Whatever you want Yeah, Lewis this he he did a fake blog job. Of course people know that no you'd never blow somebody that's so many dicks I got a lot of dicks in the studio over the years. We've collected a lot of penises We're not afraid to dick in the studio. No, no, not at all. Lewis was a fucking man. Onstage, two or two people, fucking bush right in front of Jim Norton, Bailey Jay. Yeah, this one Jim Norton was fucking on top too. What is he not? Not on top of him? What? Jim's still on top. He's a lazy bottom. He's a lazy bottom. It's a lazy

bottom. I mean, just lazy there. Sounds like a great band to lazy bottom. He just lays there sounds like a great band the lazy bottom's Fucking gay guys Oh, I don't worse the most of the show don't really see any dick out They just kind of stand there and wait for guys to come up Some of them sounds at me. I'll do it, but I'm just gonna go back to tell tell tell what you want to do I'm gonna go now. Let's go back tired. Yeah, let's get some french fries and just go back to the room and just watch TV. Like, let's go watch that guy on billions with the big head. Oh, so hot.

So anyways, this last weekend, was this a fast NYC tickets went on sale, sale, sale. That's right everyone. You can get tickets right now to Skankfest NYC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, CC, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C, C He's working Norman Norman No, he said no Joe List, wherrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Hey man Mickey Glazer oh suck it down Bonnie McFarland I hate my life Rich boss I hate my wife Ari Shafir I'm a Joe fuck you. I don't give a shit fuck how it's done. Tickets on sale now, both two day passes and single day passes at skankfestnyc.com.

You know what dad? No wrong podcast. You know what fucking skaaaaaand? Blubblub! Shhh! That was actual library B, we just put in there guys. Yeah, that was a library guys. ¡Oh, sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss 19 euros. Volotea. Parifa sujetas a disponibilidad. Consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. Um, este último día, ¿me quieres ir, Món? Yo quiero decir, mi amigo, ¿me sabes, ¿no?

Hola. ¿Tanto a qué? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Le gusta a la izquierda? ¿Le gusta a la izquierda? ¿Le gusta a la izquierda? ¿Le gusta a la izquierda? ¿Le gusta a la izquierda? Yo, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, si, The Littor's presence of children. Dude, I'm getting it if I could kill her. I don't know why he allows you.

That's a stretch. Can we be honest? That's a stretch. He's brown, he's got a short beard, he's not fat. Dude, fucking Santa, the whole thing was from... He's from Egypt. Yeah, dude, I mean, he looks kind of like Santa. It's a solid fucking reference. Santa's from Norway.

Yeah, close. Close isn't an Egyptian name. Yeah. Santa, the elves just throw gays off of the roofs. is an Egyptian name. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Tattoo it might one of my favorite stars no Tatooine you're fucking idiot And Latietta tattoo wise to guys my favorite good friend of mine if you want to smoke anybody guys me's asked me what's the Party of smoke tattoo wise It's July 14th and 15th. Yeah, you know you should do 14th or 15th. Yeah, you know you should do is I've got to get it before that but I'll be at the trade show so we'll get something together. Yeah, talk to us.

That'd be great. A nice for everybody smoking tattoo. Why haste at Skankfest put a nice one in maybe some Tatt and a fucking sticker or some type of that'd be a good thing then we all smokes the guys who put a nice fucking Instagram out Then we all smoke cigars and put a nice fucking Instagram out There you go good feel Fucking hit that guy Shut up Oh I think my mother might be going to get the tent what kind of tent do I get? Tell her to get a two person REI tent, REI hang on one second please

I hit it back so That's alright don't worry about it. Two person. Yeah? Okay. Okay. Oh, you're going camping? Joe's going camping? Joe's going to, yeah. You're a fucking piece of shit.

I'm not specifically said, I'll do it. I would love to do a camping with you. We're going to do, we're not doing that. Yeah. Me and you will go, okay. We're going to go to camp site. Okay. dummy.

We're going, we're literally walking up into the woods. I'm not bringing a max. I'll be, it's called primitive camping. We're walking up into the woods, finding a spot bringing a max. I'll be what's called primitive camping. We're walking up into the woods, finding a spot, staying there overnight, coming back down the next day. Well, me and you are gonna go up to the campsite up like an hour up from where I am.

And they get all kinds of shit for the kids to do plus we have the tent, fire pit. You know, that's what we're doing. I heard my feelings for a minute. Oh, that's all right. I don't wanna hurt your feelings, Lou. But it's just a different camping. Pentative?

Was that a camping joke? Of course tentative. I like that. Based on work-tempt. Yeah. So anyways, you know spiders have tentacles. They don't. They don't.

They actually have legs. They have legs. They have legs. They have legs, dummy. Like that joke. Yeah, you have legs that are fucking bumping me the whole fucking show it sucks I can't I keep telling him stop it fire him It sucks the whole you fucking know you can take him sitting like this

Fucking ridiculous Firefight him. Fight him Joe fight fight fight fight fight I'm getting a white all on set me if the white don't win we all jump in they would really say that They would sing that to you guys might the white kids in my neighborhood jump me. What would it say? They would all fight a fight and they go on a white if the white don't win we all jump in. Oh, yeah, I remember that Yeah, yeah from earlier today when you were telling me it my god I see Joe my mother you had a two-jow and you bring it down the show maybe I am I'm taking my mother a bun. You're gonna add it to, Joey, and you're bringing it down the show. Maybe I am, I'm fucking bummed out.

I can't, it's, I'm just bumping all day. Is that really bothering you? It's 100% of the time. Let me tap your knee every 10 seconds. I would not want that. It's not, can you not drag me into it? I'm just wondering, do you have a problem with what he's doing?

All right, anyways, so yeah, let's keep going. Fucking N word. Ba, buh, buh, buh. Joe's really upset. Fucking N word. BAAAHHHH! BAA BAA BAA! Joe's really upset. I'm upset! You really are upset. I'm upset. It's crazy.

It's not on purpose man it's an accident. My legs bump and I do it. I get a little nervous sometimes. The N word was a little nervous. Oh the N word was on purpose. That's what that's true. You really made all of us uncomfortable. No. I thought here's what I do. I put everyone on their back heels and then they go shit and then you get the best out of somebody.

On the back heels? On their back heels. First of all you don't get the best out of anybody. Because I'm posting the show right shit and then you get the best at a somebody on the back heels. They're back heels. You don't get the best at anybody because I'm posting the show right now and I'm getting the best out of my guests. Uh oh. Do you want to move on next stop? I'm just waiting.

Here's what happens. Yes, tell us. If you want to see the best set of a man, okay? Watch him when his back is against the wall. Watch him when shit is hit the fan. Watch him when he's fucking dealing with a little bit of shit he's uncomfortable with and you will see the best that man could make that. against the wall. Watch him when shit is hit the fan. Watch him when he's fucking dealing with a little bit of shit he's uncomfortable with, and you will see the best that man could be.

So I'm bringing the best set of everybody in the room by saying the end word so much. He has, this is what he does, because he has to have, he has the Rambo theory. Yeah. Fight a flight. Yeah, he can't, he can't only, only does good when it's fucking,

he's just gonna die. When the rest of us, just we can have a good podcast and not have to piss everybody off and make you fucking flip out and get angry and feel visceral. He needs to do that, you see? Want to make me visceral.

He wants to make you go fucking, fuck you! Let's have you spit your, that kind of thing. Whoa. I would never say that. Maybe you're right. Maybe you're right. Too far. Oh, sure. Final fuck. don't want everyone to do what I do either. Everyone's got to do what they do. Joe's got to do what the fuck is shitty clips.

Not everybody can do what you do. You fucking idiot. I'm not a whips. I'm a whips. You know Bobby's going to fuck you up. I'm a whips. I'm a whips. I'm a whips.

I'm a whips. I'm a whips. I'm a whips. I'm a whips. I'm a whips. I'm a whips. I'm a whips. I'm a whips.

I'm a whips. I'm a whips. I'm a whips. I'm a whips. I'm a whips. I do what I do either everyone's gonna do what they do Joe's gonna do Nobody's gonna get it. Not everybody can do what you do. You fucking be in the middle. I'm not whips, I'm not gonna go. You know Bobby's gonna fucking talk about where everyone can angry at everyone because they talk over him once at every 20 times that he does to them. I have no angry dude. Fucking Mike's gonna die of some sort of fucking disease in the next to me. Yeah.

Yeah, I was gonna be all blotchy and boring. Oh yeah. Why could I be all blotchy and boring. What could it be? You can I say something though it's funny. We're all sitting there when he said when he said something about you You just quiet. He's just on me. We just said about him. He said something about Gary. We are going It really is what's good. What's good for you is good. Well blotchy and boring worked What's good for you is good. Well, Blotchin boring worked. Blotchin's preparation. Yeah, you should see your shins. Yes, sorry. I'm sorry. He's gonna be all. Bob is gonna be all fucking frisky and fat and this is a

little ration. Do me. Do me. Joe's gonna be all country and cookie. Just don't know. Blotchin. Mike's gonna be all fucking sick and stupid. Yes, but you're singing a Mike being sick and stupid They did the roast battle this weekend Gabby and Mike Mooshie Mike did the roast battle. Oh, oh Launchy Gabby and Mooshie Mike did the roast battle and I was very I was one of the judges

I was very fucking nervous first one was very sick. I don't know if you know that. That had really been- Very beautiful. No, not diabetes. I get it. Pre. I had a migraine. I almost threw up sitting at that fucking table.

And then they'll put the AC on at the stand. And the ceiling's a four feet tall. 80 people in there, packed within two seconds. It's 170 degrees. I'm standing big J, Ron, and then me next to each other. I was almost passed out. I almost threw up and passed out. Finally put the fucking AC on thank God and the beautiful manager over there gave me an ad bill. That line up it literally was gonna be eating competition. That was terrible. I was so hot and then these two are doing it. I'm gonna say, before we watch the footage, okay?

I thought I had it going to dinner with Mike the night before, right? And I think there's two ways you can go about roast battle. You can go and get help and really write a bunch of things and treat it like, almost like an essay or some type of homework. Or you can go eat for eight hours straight with Bobby Kelly at a restaurant. E the war. And I think me really did go nuts. I saw dumplings.

I was trying to, we were like, let's get salads. Okay, dumplings on a sign. Fucking 19 dumpling plate. I was late. I mean, this fatso was small. I think it was my fault he fucking, anyways, I'm not gonna give anything away. He, I didn't know who's gonna come out of the gate.

I had a feeling you were very studious and very, from what you do for the show, I know how you are and that when you're given a task, you murder it. I like that funny has not come into play. Yeah, not even a second. Well, I'm gonna let her do it. That's fine, I'm gonna let you do it. I'm gonna let you be the funny and a mic I thought Mike is fizz these vicious. He's mean on the show. He says stuff

I his comedy's a little edgier than hers. I was like, I don't know who's gonna pull out of this What then my comedy exists on stage, but it's fine. I put you on my show you a little bitch Yeah, how have we nothing on your show? You want to do it? Well, you want to take a fucking rich show at the Brooklyn Seven o'clock the sun still out when she's doing her shows. Oh, I'm kidding. You're thinking of a better tan Jesus I told you I don't tan baby. I can pill. Anyways, Rose battle. Louis J Gomez, you get a lot of shit when you come out too. Why?

When you host, people fuck with you a lot. Yeah, you gotta let the room know that that's what's gonna happen. So, you know, I let the judges. There's two girls that left behind me. They thought I got a little me. Because they couldn't see. Sorry. You're gonna be me the bad.

That's a good one. Lewis got so excited. He put the mic, his instincts to pull the mic away. His arm went, no, it's too good. And it pulled away. Anyway. All right. So here it is.

You ready this? Did you see these two girls? Right on this? I said, this is your girl. Right on Bobby Kelly, like this is awful. My dear Ruins, I want to act out. All right, so I'm getting the impression, obviously, that Gabby annihilates Mike. You're gonna see, maybe not. I feel like you think you're setting this up to be like.

Well, I'm not setting it up to. Oh, so much. So much. I'm trying to just say that I was very shocked at this, with this outcome. So, Gabby, you are a comic. Yes. And Mike is a comic.

I know Mike. Mike is great. I would talk about Goody as but Lewis got upset last time. No, because he goes, oh, Mike is fucking 40 times a comic that Lewis is. And then I saw Mike and I'm like, Mike is not one tenth of a comic that I am. At least 10 times and Mike is not one tenth of comic that I am He's 10 times funnier than you know. I'm sorry not for not for it. I'd say like 4% for yeah

I would say for I would say six 40% 6% stronger. Yeah. Yeah. No, you're fat. Yeah By the way, she might wouldn't kill you to go hey, can I sneak by also? I do you're in the same it's like a whole team is bumping you over here i'm sorry about that what's wrong with you getting bumped luis is an animal and i'm just trying to go he's that's luis but mic just go ahead can i scooch i did it was too far excuse me joh you're being very aggressive with every joh are you okay it's not okay or you're not being

you're not being aggressive now can i tell you are being aggressive he's being joh yeah go ahead joh come to Joe. No, I meant say Robert. Hang on a second. Robert. Oh, well, I think I should. My pants. Robert. Yes. Here's the thing. I am consistently who I am. Yes. We jump. Robert Kelly said this in the years ago is one of the best things that we're one I was going to move to LA. Yeah, and it stuck with me. He said, wherever you go, there you are. Right. Right. That's true. And I really did. It's not a original spot to me. It's not, it was Bobby Kelly's. He said, dude, the road less traveled will lead to, I don't know the rest of it.

I said, boo, do you have a positive perspective? I'll follow what happened. Callo B, thy name, dude. I wrote that last night. Bobby said, one of the best things I've ever heard. It is what it is It's changed my life You make that up you wherever you go there. No, it's from some it's from life. It's a book called wherever you go

There you are it's a great quote. I quote I'm a tribute a great quote to Robert Kelly because three times a week You can but you can but you can attribute it to me because I use it my life because we're the same people and I gave it to you. But were you eating off that book? Oh, apparently you're still unfunny too. I was talking to the bomb dinner. Where have you go? There you are. Right on my microphone. Go ahead.

This is why this show is a fucking nightmare. We're trying to get him. We're trying to get him and now it's on me somehow. No, I'm sorry, you're right. He got you to go against me. I'm not against you, I'm not. And I give you a fucking nightmare. So I'm a great hot cat. We're trying to get him, we're trying to get him and now it's on me somehow. No, I'm sorry, you're right. He got you to go against me. I'm on against you, I'm on against you. And I give you a great quote. Where we go, there you are. Where we go with it?

Now where? Why is your watch that size? Because I like it. No, it was too. But you have to use your big fat wrists. Look at this thing. It's insane. That's a professional wrestling belt for anybody else.

So listen, are you taking a class? Are you fucking Rick Chrome? Joe, listen, you're being inconsistent. See, I'm always an asshole and aggressive. You're usually a nice person. So right now you're gonna be... I'm not usually sitting next to you. That's true, we don't usually sit Joe next to you.

You're usually sitting on the other side of Dan who Dan knows you better and puts up Dan doesn't care about a little leg bump and we're fucking dancing. We're all together. We're a little physical Fucking thick So anyways, uh Joe can you give me water out of that fridge so Mike doesn't have to bump you and you flip out? Oh my god, you bang the fucking door Joe Joe. Holy shit, Joe. My whole day is thrown off because Joe's banging doors around. There you go, Louis. I mean, Bobby. You come in Louis. Why accident? What the fuck, man? Well, you guys have similar fucking dumb gigantic watches. And, you know, what else? That's it. I was gonna say

you're both fat, but Louis looks great. Thanks. You know why you being mean to me? I didn't do shit to you. I didn't bump you in the water. I was trying to shit on him but it wasn't gonna work because he's not gross. He's gross. He's got nine different shades of brown on his body. He really is. Yeah, the skin is a problem. And you're calling her blotchy by the way. You got spots. And you're calling her Blodsheep, by the way. You got spots. You have more spots in your face than your calendar. He's only a species. Oh, that's right, that's very good.

Thank you. Joe is back, Joe is back. Well, by the way, can you fucking look? You got your legs under the table. I can breathe, I can live my life. Yeah, he's sitting. He's a spick with freckles. All right, let's do this.

This is the roast battle. God damn it. Every, you know, who knows who will win? No, we're set up ever. Don't listen to him at all. Listen to me, ever. No, I mean, I will not in the right place. 25.

Oh, yeah, he should put it to where they're both already on stage for his voice. Because he knows where you're at in the clip. Make sure you pay attention to Lewis. As much as a pain to me to say this. What? Lewis should probably host this podcast from now on. Let's do it.

Lewis, you're in. I'll do it. Cool. All right. What's up, Dad? By the way, if you should retire and just give me this show, I would probably combine real ass podcasts with this one. I really, why would consider that?

If you, if I took over, why would I get a very close, dude it we're very close. It's not bad. It's a great idea. Do me and Zach sort of look like you look like us combined. Yeah, but we got to get you off the end. You have to be a little more civilized hostess. I'll do it if I if the assignment is don't say the end word if that's one of the fucking lines. I have no problem with it. I'm husband. I don't have a fuck I don't want I think in life Yeah, we don't we don't we don't know that was unsaid but we could say at the top of the show for no one Well, yeah, if that's a rule of the show, I probably wouldn't do your fucking faggy show anymore Faggy's another rule Richard Whoa, wait a minute. Don't be such a pig Sorry Joey I couldn't think of it seriously out of the fucking ballpark third. All right, here we go

Gabby was smart and I said one thing before they get into it Gabby was smart to dress like a dyke because it puts her into like You know dress like a dyke because it puts her into like, you know, nobody's going like, oh my gosh, the hot chick, fuck, and whatever. It's just dull it down. What's almost like a dude. But the 80 sexualizes here. Nobody wants to fuck her.

Exactly. It's, it's, it's, it's jokes. The jokes. Is that intentional that you don't dress hot? Because I've seen you dress hot and you're really shine. Yeah, do you ever wear like a dress cleavage, the shoes? No cleavage ever, but. I do.

You ever put a chicken collet in your tits? Yeah, I'll ever stuff it up a little bit. No. No, I always dress bad for a stand-up. Okay. Then they focus on my voice. There we go. Stop.

Stop that headshot. Steve, just go back a little bit. Look at her in that phone. That head stop. Hatch out. Hatch out. Steve, just go back a little bit. Look at her and that phone. That's like an insane, literally jerked off to that Hatch out. Yeah, you're a movie star in that. I mean, you're a fucking television star.

Thank you. You're like an afternoon Nickelodeon TV star. Thank you. I'm there. You look like fucking Jody Foster in there. Don't say anything though. You didn't have it. No.

Don't go in the, and then think of it. Sorry. sorry just say jody foster we all could have laughed all right all right good all right there we go a lot of bass on that track yeah you've been doing a based on that track. Oof. Yeah, he's a singer and actress and now she's ready to fail at comedy. She has a podcast about the apocalypse. He's desperately looking for the scenario where she can actually make it in this business. I stopped you for one second. I love that your eyes close, it's every bomb.

Yeah. You can't just put, you can't just say facts. You can't, you can't, put you can't just say facts You I don't think that's because that's because your tongue can't stop your mouth But what do you say you said he can't say say facts and I said is because the tongue can't touch the top of his mouth Did you also say oof to my thing about the base? So my thing made me furious. Yeah, he did go off. And I get to it. And he's about to fucking do six oofs in a row.

We're at it down for the podcast name. Six oofs in a row. Six oofs in a row. Listen, dude, that, that base thing was stupid. Now, you should call this podcast wherever you go. There you are. Go ahead. We won't call it that. It's too long. She's bored in the dials in my own hairline. That's

why I'm wearing this hat. All right. Let's just say. I wasn't ready. Stop. Oh man. What's why am I laughing? He said, all right. I got after the first thing didn't hit. I was like, this is is this gonna be rough Now is the audience not mic'd or there Hang on one second no, this was actually practice in the after like three in the afternoon. I know, go ahead. Here we go. You don't edit the podcast. Oh, my God. First one.

Not anymore. OK. OK, close it up for one second, because Mike isn't having fun there. So this is also where it starts to really hurt. Because on his face right there, he's already lost. And when the audience feels that, so now the audience, anytime you speak is uncomfortable, so now they really hate you.

But wait, if you look at his face right now, it's like, please, please don't say something funny. Please, please, please suck. Please, why told you, please, people we even did this, she was gonna win. God, no, listen, listen, Mike, this is the funny, this is the best thing you can do right now is take this pounding your about to take. Go ahead. I mean that if he cuts carbs, he'd lose 10 pounds.

Yeah, it's super gross, you call your balls carbs. It's okay. The gross by-pounds each. It wasn't even really, she was saying you had big balls. It's not that. Yeah, which I didn't get. But I was going to say what she did was, I'll tell you right now because I watch the show every weekend I book a show and I, we get it.

You're fucking awesome. Go. So she just landed the joke. Simple as that. It was a joke that landed. She had rehearsed it. She had set it 100 times in the mail. She set a punch tag.

She set a punch. Didn't even matter. It in the middle of punch tag. Yeah, punch. Didn't even matter. It didn't make sense that much. You're because you're a total. Yup. You're tonal. And that's what people do on these late night sets. Doesn't even matter.

It's not funny. They handle. Yeah. Thank you for noticing. I appreciate that. Yeah. No substance. No, it doesn't matter if it's funny or whatever it is.

It's just Bing Bing Boom. boom boom boom. You keep them laughing Right, but Mike Mike had nowhere them if you watch what Mike does Mike was just saying shit on a train To give you give a baby a drum like the beat the US got baby to play. Yeah, Gabby's never gonna make it Yeah, it's cuz of her dad Not even that confident Yeah, it's like good. All right. Let's see the rest of his bullshit. If you don't know who that is you're not 50 years old Stop go back there in the rock and roll hall of fame Everyone knows about you guys go back because you missed the bond Joby line go go go

We go Right It's okay But he is not even an important member of that band. He's actually just the keyboardist That's like saying you're the banjo player for Billy Joel stop. There's no banjo player in Billy Joe That's the joke. Yeah, but no, there's not a you can't I didn't yeah, you're right Lizzie man, he's the banjo player you you have to Next time you have to roast call me out. Don't you not to do it? Call my Yeah, call anybody call my mom Jesus Mike That one was bad and the fact this what sex about the roast metal the fucking sound effects guy just

Really hurt you. Muir! It's the sound that you would hear in your head if you could play the sound in your head. When he said that joke, like the banjo playing for Billy Joe. Muir! It was funny. He really thought he was gonna nail a little bit of it. I need a B word.

Banjo! Banjo Billy Joe! Banjo Billy! That's gonna kill I Wasn't even the punchline though. It's not this is Bob and me. I can watch a little bit of deep whose topical stuff Deepos videos with the best this isn't as bad. I'll tell you why because this is a world You literally never said these jokes before so the problem is you should have prepared more

You read them off a thing which makes me know that you didn't rehearse them You didn't memorize I was, you didn't memorize them. I was writing them up until we started. That's a problem dude. Then you got bodied on and you should have. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. She fucking wrote them a week out. She rehearse some guarantee. She looked like I was booked a week out. She's not. Are you ever you were booked at the same time? She's not reading off a sheet of paper. She's not. It's true. Yeah. Right. Right here we go. Here we go. Hold on. Okay. I had more of these stops.

Mike is from San Antonio, Texas, where the only liberal things are his meal porches. Stop. That was a good joke. I like jokes. I like it. I like jokes and that one. I like that joke.

Oh. You'll hear the rest of it. Come. He considers pro choice only at a buffet. Actually, he considers an abortion just shitting to make room for dessert. That's pretty good. Wow, good.

So I was right, look it right there, you knew. That face is great. That's a great face. Right there, he went, he looked at his paper, and he looked at that bitch, and he went, ah, fuck me. Look at both there, you know that face is great. That's a great face. Right there, he went, he looked at his paper and he looked at that bitch and he went, ah, fuck me. Look at both their faces, that's beautiful. Look at her, look at that fuck you, poor face. She's got it, you felt right then, what did you feel?

That I prepared a lot more. That's right. Now, Gabby, this is also the first time you're ever getting left. So how did that feel? Fuck you. Consistently. Now Gabby, this is also the first time you're ever getting laughs. So how did that feel? I fucked you. Consistently. I got it.

That's better be good. You're a lanky hooker. All right. You stop. Stop. You can't just... You can't. You want to be better off saying you fucking cut than Lanky Hooker. Well, I didn't want to do cut drugs. Because all of us are doing does. Oh, I'll tell you what I got.

I mean, I can really break down. Why, I'll tell you what I got. That's also not him. So he's doing like a lazy hooker. Like, I don't think that Mike would ever call her a Lanky Hooker if they were hanging out at having drinks, right? So it didn't come off.

It right there, I'm going to ask him to have his type type of confidence it's just not who he is there's so much wrong with this I mean I but so much right look at Mike did great or did a good it would we really be listening we would never watch this there's no I was trying to tell him on the phone when he was about to jump off his building that night like watch think I'm like, watch out at this people below. You do not want to ruin. I don't want to cast something. You don't want to ruin 15 people. That's already in my sight, but that's what I got.

But comes from Jersey trash, but they're also rich, which means they have a pool, but they still swim in their genes. True. It also means that her dad is the kind of guy who was trying to score a coke at a funeral. So he could be walking up here now. Stop, stop, stop. What did Vasey?

He's walking up here now. Fuckin' Vasey. You know Bon Jovi? But I... A bunch of Joe would have been like, she has a pool, but they still swim in puddles. The jeans part wasn't better. Like, well, he just, you know, But I about a joke would have been like she has a pool, but they still swim in puddles. The jeans part wasn't better. Well, he just, you know, that wasn't even a bad joke. Like it wasn't a terrible. It was just when he delivered the second joke, he still, he went back to his sheet, like he was reading more. He's convincing the audience not to laugh in that moment.

There's all the year to stick the landing. You had a fuck. I'm telling you right now, that was a better joke than her first horse shit joke. She just shit joke She's rehearsed it and landed it and then hit the rhythm There's so much that you don't even fucking realize it goes into it And he was just so under prepared for this that you were gonna get bodied by almost anybody I just don't know anyone that swims in their jeans. That's what I don't get well you don't know poor people So you mean like cut off jeans I'm swim trix. You just go in the pool and the jeans. That's a very small group.

I find people, I mean, it's a poor people thing. Yeah, I mean, I grew up with poor people. Well, I didn't say when swimming in jeans. Most people's jeans fit my collect shorts. That's what he's saying. I'm not tall. That's tall, Joe. You pulled a real me right there. I'm just telling you

Comedy I'm just telling you my personal reaction. I've never heard of anyone swimming in jeans I've never seen anyone swimming in jeans. I have a lot of poor friends like low We get at the jokes. I don't understand. Nobody's defending the joke My We said it should a bit of puddle or like nobody under 50 knows who bon Jovi is there internationally famous They're huge pretty right now make more sense if it was like you know fucking ELO or somebody Joe What do you have to say Rick? I

This is bad Rick is a great representative of the entire audience right now Rick is doing asshole kegels right now You gotta keep a tight man. Asshole kegels. Not as a top. You never do. You're asshole kegels, Lucy's you. I know, but I'm old, I'm just incontinent. It's not for a sex, it's just for safety.

All right, here we go. Oh. Okay. I think it's your turn. Yeah. Good. All right. Here we go. Thank you, Jay, and Silent Blob.

Ah! That's great. You look like a lesbian jewel thief who lost the diamond to his gambling addiction. First one was good. Silent blob is great. You vapid receptacle. Did you like that? I did like that. I called somebody a receptacle.

It really doesn't matter what. It's like, it wasn't my fault. I didn't get a receptacle. I really Rare's a matter of what it's like it wasn't my fault You always that good. That was good. I like that one I was very proud of that receptacle. By the way, I think your act is great. Thank you. This was terrible I feel like I should keep that out there Yeah, I thought was funny with that mappin receptacle and this whole thing and again Here's the thing I Know what I look like I'm fat. I'm gross. I'm been I look like. I'm fat, I'm gross, I'm middle aged. Keep going. I'm not likable.

That's Bob's joke. She's beautiful, right? She's rich. She said everything she could ever need, everything that she could ever want. But here we both are in the exact same place in this industry. The best you could do with all her advantages,

you mean the same place as a diabetic Mexican from Texas? Stop. Shut up. Gabby's little laugh right there. Is so fucking passive. Look at the corner of Gabby's mouth in that fucking head shot. What the dimple? Not just a little smirk in the corner. Thank you. Yeah. Gabby's little laugh really

bad. Such a fucking 20 move. Can we play that back? She's a little bit. They don't have a 15 second thing. So I could. Okay. Bobby Kelly's kidney stone. Like that. I'm out of the going salt and one. That was a good one. She we know what the joke we got the joke. Yes, I know. I know. I'm out of the going salt and what that was a good one She we know what the joke we got the joke. Yes, I know I know I'm just saying that's how you appreciate it twice I'm gonna fuck you Top

Well, what if two tops get together you just fight it out sideways No, it's more pleasurable from missionary or doggy style if if you're the top. Is it different or is the same thing? Let's go. I don't want to get into this, please. Why not? I just want to hear this first. Can we not get into what you like? The only possible way that Mike will get his picture on the Comedy Cellar wall is if he

eats their biggest burger in under five minutes. That's good. That's really good. They will never let you on stage, but they will special order your t-shirt size. That was a great. That's a great point. That was a killer. And that's it, right? Yeah. That was a really good, because it's not just that your jokes were bad. It was that hers were good. You know, it's the worst one, but yeah. Yeah, she really killed me. Did somebody write for you with you? Bobby said Lesbian

Jewel thief once. And I wrote a joke around. Now is that, is that, is your, is your comedy that good? Are you one of those I can write roast jokes but stinks in comedy? I think my comedy is good. All right. We have that if you want to watch it. Yeah, let's watch a Gabby set. I know I have the village on the ground. So I mean, the pussycat. You do? Yeah, let's watch it Gabby set. I know I have the village underground. So I mean, the pussycat. You do? Yeah, let's see Gabby set. But I mean, you want to you know her set is gonna stink

If it will here's a thing is a roast battles different do you can go and bomb on a roast battle? I watch great comics fucking eat their dicks off me on the TV show means nothing You're trying out the jokes at the first time. It's not a representation of who you are as a comedian It's a representation of you fucking, you know if you did it that night. Yeah, Mike you didn't No, I did not but like we did the boss roast everybody killed it was so much fun, but it did it that night, in Mike, you didn't. No, I did not. But when we did the boss roast, everybody killed. It was so much fun. But it was, it was, it's a little easier too, because you like everybody. It's a conanna, here's a thing.

There's not a competition. You're entertaining. But you know, I think I crowd is different. Just when I did last comic standing, you reminded me of this. The level of pressure where you're being judged, and it's a competition. And it's not just entertaining a crowd.

You have this other thing where you're sort of going like, well, now I'm playing to judges and I'm playing to this competition. I'm trying to think about that. It's a way different thing. When you're doing a roast, you're just trying to fucking fuck with each other and make the crowd laugh. It's way, way, way less questions. I'm going to say it without like really quick, whatever he just did,

it's because you like each other. No, that's not what I said at all. I know, but it's what you meant. Tell him, no, it's the only competition. It's a special. You like each other. Yeah, roast's not what I said at all. I know, but it's what you meant. No, no, no, no. Absolutely. It's a special. You're like each other. Yeah, roast battles. Yeah, roast battle. Also, you don't like each other. Holder, you have you judging them. They don't like each other. They don't like each other. They're a lot of time they do. They fucking, they're so mean. That's the one thing about these roast battles. They're fucking vicious. They're, they're best friends sometimes. What do you talk about? Vicious. Yeah. They don't

always like each other. No. No. That's not the case that night. There was some people that didn't like each other It's not that they don't like it. But those days people that don't like each other too when you don't like Lewis You told me right before the show we're good here. Yeah, but I told you to shut the fuck up about that Now I'm glad he's fucking bumping you the whole show. No, he stops. Oh, didn't you've noticed I've started Talking about I had the one with the two girls couldn't see because you were too fat A couple others yeah, well Mike. I say they do it again. I don't I don't think I even get it no No, no, you know that wasn't good But if you took the notes that I just gave you you could be good. You're a good joke right or you're a good comic

Yeah, great. Could you help me? I mean, he doesn't need my hobby Took the notes that I just gave you you could be good. You're a good joke right or you're a good comic. Yeah I mean, he doesn't need my hobby. I think if you were someone else's help Joe why don't you fucking roast battle me little bitch. I'll roast battle you Jover's Lewis. Jover's Lewis. You're the host. Jover's coming out of retirement to Bob and Joe. You're the host. So in, Joe, come on. Fuck yeah. You're the host. Do it, Joe.

Fuck it. Teach him who's boss. Joe's really good too. I know Joe's killer. I'll battle Joe list literally any time he wants. Wow. That'd be amazing. Just slapped you right in the face.

All right, maybe we'll do it. I'm dead. When? I want to judge that one. Okay. Now it's unfair. Why? Because you guys have both of kids.

Well, the fuck is it? You might be biased to this. You guys both of herbys. You don't have herbys, dude. I don't have herbys. You want it? No. I'm a top two.

I don't want to get out of here. Look, how funny was it when you sent the picture you you dig to me, but it wasn't your dig, it was Chrissy's, these dig. And then I sent it to Chrissy D and I go, Joe just sent me a picture of his dig and he got mad, he goes, that's my dig. Oh, man, yeah, you never wrote back to another follow-up.

You're so mad, he goes, that's my dig. That's so fucking funny. I got me, too, by Christus Deppin' about 25 times at Moontower. It's just different dig perks. Yeah, every morning I wake up in his dick. So nice dick. We stopped sleeping in his room, Fag.

Ha ha ha ha. All right, whatever. Not cool. Wow. I'm sorry, dude. It's not cool. You're talking about a gainus. I'm not talking about him being a fucking pussy.

I'm talking about him being a little bitch boy. You're saying, like, literally, Fag for gay, which is fucking highly offensive to motion mouth mic You fucking cock suckers. Yeah, be great job. That's a word. I approve of do you Cuckers good to the point well, Rick. I appreciate you coming on today, man And I hope you will be throwing me out. Well, no, we're ending the show. Oh, we're gonna we wrap it up It takes around 40 minutes for me to wrap up We have to wrap up like two hours after do up. It takes around 40 minutes for me to wrap up.

We have to wrap up like two hours after do it. It takes around it takes a long time. Some of some I lose will say something else. Joe will say something. We'll go off on another tangent. Joe want to know how do you like it on the side or on the back. Sure. And then you know so I'm just going to show him. And you'll show him. In this room, all of the males in here, which one would you, which is your type? This is pretty obvious. Oh, really? This is such a, come on. This is such a, come on. Stand up, Zach. It's a hairy guy. He's too hairy. I don't like hair. He's a little, I don't like hair. Keep going. Come on. It's obviously Louis.

Is it really? I'm fucking third or fourth you're 50 fat I used to be number Gabby's ahead of you She has the type of chest he likes from behind. She's my type She has the type of chest. She really does have a Filipino boy. Yes, they said A little bit of tutorial definition. I don't know. I mean, turn, turn down the lights and maybe you're all

a candidate, you know, it's like I heard this earlier. You'd really go Lewis Joe. And then, and one of my, then Mike and me, or we at the same time, the bearded guy before you jumping off the building before us. Are you kidding me Rick? No, I'm fucking third. I have affection for you Romantic, but I don't know if I'm on a physicalize it. You know what I mean? Fucking what the fuck?

You be now. I number one if it does anything for you. Thank you Joe You did about animal instinct. I would go Yeah, Lewis is a fucking animal. I would go you know, yeah Lewis is a fucking animal All right, we know you like Lewis first we get it. Can we move on from that key stop picking you? No man Thanks, Rick come on with coming up with nine different scenarios that you'd pick Lewis first we get it But are you actually jealous now? Hypothetical it might be four Mike at least Yes, you're before Mike and my business because you're the host no no

First of all, I don't want you to throw me any fucking balls, okay? I'm hairy, so you don't want to. It's too hard. I don't like the hairy. I want to know, am I before Mike? You're not gonna see me. Before or after we watched him try to roast somebody.

It's not like that. It's not like that. It's not like that. It's not like that. It's not like that. It's not like that. It's not like that. It's not like that.

It's not like that. It's not like that. It's not like that. It's not like that. It's not like that. It's not way that was a turn on. That was so fucking brilliant. Zach is after me, right? Oh yeah. How far is the drop off from Joe to me? Oh, I got a good body, too. Wow, I work out. About four drinks.

Four. Wow. So you have to legally almost be dead. Yeah, and I haven't been drinking for four years, so I've never been drinking for four years But why why why take this personally? I mean, I don't know I love you and I would I would certainly like my dick under your neck or something He said he fuck your neck. I would take it. I would take it. I would fuck you Neck your neck for neck five. I wouldn't I wouldn't fuck you But I would definitely like just play with it with my fingers I'm talking about your neck fat. Where would you fucking the guy wise who's first?

Why not Rick because Rick is a top and I'm letting Rick fuck me as ridiculous I'm not Rick because Rick is a top and I'm letting Rick fuck me as ridiculous. No, but we don't have to fuck. Just kiss a little. You're a lot. You're a lot. Sucking dick is you. I hear you're good at it. Yeah, we can just 69 a little.

I'd show you first. And Rick is also significantly older than you. And he could be your father. That's right. You could always get that father that you always wanted. What else is that? I pop he see. I like to hear it.

Joe's got herps. My asshole doesn't have herpes. Shit. I got,'s got herpes. My asshole doesn't have herpes. Shit. I got, I got genitals. Yeah, but we got to suck each other's dick a lot to like, I like a lot of oral sex in order to get me going. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, but they're, okay. But yeah, it's only shedding 8% of the days out of the year, eight days out of the year. Eight days out of the year, you ditch sheds. Yeah. It's on the floor like a snake. But it gets bigger every time You blow me you won't get anything what is it time to you? What does that mean at times like that's when you can get it if we

Fucked when my fuck you he gets herpes Eighthours the little red nugget on it. No, I don't even get it. That's when it sheds that when it's it spreads around I don't know how you know you. You know, you know, no That's part of the fun Or you can out break when you get an out break you can't be we can't be fucking So that's a good movie It's pretty good with all the respects sir. Fuck you. Okay, so so Lewis then Bobby who is the first one? Who's the first one me? No, I'm asking a lot of time. I'm taking herpes from you do you're not hot enough

I can't get the herpes. It's not forcing him into you. But what he was saying is Joe has herpes. That's the one reason he still have. Obviously, I'm the answer. But no, I'm going to say, I think if you try to blow me, you would just great the top and bottom on my deck with your teeth. I would not. I would not. I would not be able to blow you. Unless you're hitting a bump. I wouldn't be able to blow you. I wouldn't be able to blow Yeah, I never do too much coaching. Oh, you got small mouth. No, I could never be gay. Oh my god Someone give me a force up. I got to open his mouth. Oh my god That's all we go is that as open as it goes? Yeah, hurt to do that. I go

Wow, no, it's not really Really No Stop it Dude I Hurts my feelings I got a tattoo dick so my whole thing perfect. You've tied to diabetes Perfect you've tied to diabetes You suck dick in China God who would you pick I was good what?

Let me see you at least that when is your body what this is real Pick up your shirt Jack pick it up. Let me see your stomach. Oh This is how it starts. Let me see your fucking body, Zach. Zach. Zach. I'm not asking. I'm telling you I want to see your stomach definition. That's a car. I was just afraid we're gonna see our races Cuz I can shave this fucking hair. Yes, all no, no, nobody wants to see that I don't want to be able to turn off make a choice you got enough We don't have to dig it and make funny sound effects to make that worthwhile You have enough intel who would you who's your first pick?

Sound effects to make that worthwhile. You have enough intel. Who's your first pick? Well, blah, blah, blah, blah. What's between you and Rick, I guess. Really? Wow, you got a daddy fetish. Son of daddy fetish. No, yeah, I just happened to be a...

I have to choose one. This is my fucking options. Look at this. It's like, gross. I happen to be a handsome. It's a fucking nightmare. This is like literally, I'm in the dates of hell and things. Like, where are you gonna spend the rest of your days doing one of these things

I pick one Fuck your nightmare We have a sympathical relationship. I did the song. I'm used to it. You said nigger. I mean that Stop trying to fucking cock block me. You fucking all right back Fine, I'll go back on grinder I think I go, Bobby and I'll say, yes, yes, yes. I'll say why. Thank you, Louis, Jay.

I'm going to say, I came, you don't know him anything. I'm going to say right now. No, my baby girl. He would like it. He would like it a little too much. And. He's a top.

We'll talk about the top. I'm going to talk to him. I'm going to talk to him. Bobby wouldn't like it that much in. I'm a rapist. Oh, I see that would turn me on more to Fight me and fight then to have sex with you. Yeah, I wouldn't like to be raped. Yeah, all right So now Joe who would you pick I already I started I started this you dumb. No, who would you you're my number one? That's how it started. I mean I'm who's number two?

Come on the started I mean I'm on who's number two um come on I don't know we just lick your lips lose me moving too much it'd be fucking swing around you fucking common like a minute you went like this you went I go who's your number two Lewis went now Lewis I don't like Lewis is too much it'd be too I'm giving me anxiety no you don't like I'm touching your knee. I know I know you'd go you'd go with Rick number two. Oh Mike probably Rick It's just powerful that would be kind of hot. Yeah, why? Put your legs up on my shoulders and I had fucking put your legs together I put it here, but like that We're doing the fucking now. No, I'm fucking you whoa then that. Oh, you're fine. No, we're doing the fuck. No, no, I'm fucking you. Whoa.

Then it's Lewis number one, then. I'm out of the... No. Well, I'll fuck you. I'll fuck you right now. With a tube? He's gonna fuck you. Yeah, yeah.

You like that. What about me fucking you? Now, you want to fuck me? You're too sweet. I'm gonna fuck you. I'm too sweet. Rub your head. Oh.

Oh. Michael, you want a fuck? A buffet table. Yeah Not your funny It's Mark going through. I never thought about that. I guess Bobby first then Do you think we all thought about who we want to fuck first? Yeah, actually It was like the ninth time we've done this

Bobby when you were that picture of you on the wall remember you from the eight you were the fucking number one Oh, oh number one fuckable fuckable fuckable fuckable. Oh my god. Maybe if you made a move back then we wouldn't have this conversation I know now we yeah know I would have a history Ugly ugly history. I definitely have definitely be in your movie more All right Gabby so he's not here so Gabby you look up at soda. I didn't think it was gay to like fuck them But he's your number one, but he's not here so So he's gonna win this time. I don't know. I'm out. I'm out. I'm hit me with it. I don't want it

Gabby would I can't follow you again madam. You Hit me with it. I don't want to. Dad be with me. I can't bother you with getting mad at him. No, but you can pick between Lewis and Joe. Good. Joe, Dan Lewis and Joe. I'm gonna take my shirt off. It's obviously Dan. Take your shirts off and then we'll say.

No, I'm out in shape. Give me two months. All right. Well, you have to say cool, Joe. Thank you. You would take her as versus fucking me. Just pretend. It's a lie.

It's just a lie. I think dirty lie. What do you want me to say? You've been saying give you two months for a year. You can't get a place. No, I'm actually, I have a fight. I'm fighting at Ellismania. I'm fighting Ryan O'Neal. I know it's fun.

And Joel, I'm just kidding. Are you fighting for real? Yeah. Joe, prove yourself one more time. I will drop your clothing off at the Salvation Army. You're best stuff. Still with Lewis. Are you back with Lewis. Uh huh.

Are you back with Lewis again? The fuck? That's not a, that's an intern. Yeah, what are we gonna play? Are we gonna play again? I think she likes you. She doesn't like me. Here's the thing though.

I would sort of be like a fantasy of her as like a bad boy. I can't do it. But like, you know, she probably masteries me sometimes. No. Sometimes. So look at me. Look at him.

No. Never. No. Not even once. You've never been mastering then once I've. Look at him. No, never never once you've never been Mastering then once I've come into your head. No, it is now on it is though Next time she's masturbating I promise you now my face is gonna come with her head because she's not gonna be able to forget this conversation I'm gonna stop Just came Dan now why are we talking about what a woman what things out to what's the last thing you rubbed one out to Dan. Now, why are we talking about that? What are women rubbing that to? What's the last thing you rub one out to?

Oh, porn. I have to think about it. Online shopping. Saving a tree. Dan. You did? You masturbated to Dan. You know you did.

I don't think girls just masturbate to the thought of a dude. Like, could you like, just the thought of a man that you think is hot. Like, could you be like, oh, I'm gonna come up with a fantasy in my mind and masturbate to the thought of a dude. Like, could you like, just the thought of a man that you think is hot, like, could you be like, oh, I'm gonna come up with a fantasy in my mind and masturbate until I go, really? That's crazy. That's crazy. Why is that crazy?

I mean, I need something physical. I do that all the time. I need something physical. I need either to have seen how you have to have a piece of the hair in your hand. You're fucking sorry. You're fucking conjoined. You're a fool, man.

You're a fool, dude. You're fucking conjoined. I have to be head-to-. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry just be like, ah, Courtney Cox. No imagination. No, I mean, I don't watch poor,

but it has to be like an experience I have. What do you know watch porn? Very rarely. Why? Can't afford a minute. Same reason, it doesn't do anything. Yeah, it does, it runs the lives of those young girls. I'm doing quite well financially,

so that one didn't really. Can you stop being, he just take the head, it was funny. It's a joke dude. we're all doing the right, we're all doing the right, we're not, we're not, we're doing it. We're doing all right, we all know that it was all right. I mean, to can't afford it. Gabby's not really ugly, Mike's not really a bad comic.

Bobby's not real, all right. That hurt. That was fun. That was fun. I mean, I disagree with the setup, but that was fun still. That was fun. That was fun. This show is just brutal.

Ricky, your movie is... Fill it up here? I see what you did there. Do you own a Salos costume? I had one, but I ruined it. The knees, the knees were on. Listen, Rick, your movie is amazing. People need to go see it. Now, what is the night that we can go and support? And how do we donate to this go? Fun me. Tell us all about it. All right. That's going online. The link becomes live May 10th.

We're doing a thing uh... on uh... may 15th which is Tuesday next Tuesday Tuesday over at the village underground recruitment friends comicella dot com right now to buy tickets for it yes it's up on the website uh... the name of the show recruitment friends recruitment friends it's gonna be uh... jury goals gonna be there

people from the movie and who else? Judy Gold, then we've got. Bill Barr. No. He's in LA. Keep going. And we got Modi that is gonna be on it. Yeah. We got. There's a whole list of people. Jim David.

Jim David. It's Charles McBeast. You don't know Charles, but then I think you did. I got you know what I got to look and say. You got a whole list of people. This goal, because the people are getting getting on board The best comics at the seller in New York City or in the movie or support you are going to be there It's going to be an amazing show go buy it. It's going to sell out. It's probably half sold already

Oh, no, close to it. So all the money goes to raising money to get the rights right to To put this on a Netflix or show right we're kicking off the the go fund me and Raising awareness and it'll be a fun night and if you can't go we're gonna show clips from the film to show clips There's gonna be ricks gonna host it. I'm gonna host it. You're gonna be singing songs Oh, yeah, if they insist of course why not dirty songs dirty songs. Yeah, yeah, and then Let's gonna be fucking a black guy and calling him sleeve names But that's the finale And we were I sing old man river but we replace river

I don't want to go into detail. I'm giving it away And then next month at the soho film festival you'll see it on the Oric website What the dates are and it's O'll see it on the Oric website, what the dates are. And it's Oric.com. That's Oric.com. Please go there, support this. He did this, what's his name again? Dustin Susman, it was his idea. His idea, they've been working on it. It's a work of love and passion. And Rick has always been there. Nice guy for me. Love him.

Funny guy. Go support Rick Chrome, please. All right for me. Love him. Funny guy. Go support Rick Chrome. All right. Bobby, you'll be my first. Well, it's too late for that. It really bugs me. Everybody picked Lewis first. Joe, I picked you first.

I wasn't between the two. That was picked you pick me first because he bugged you. Let's even pick you first. Let's even pick me first because he bugged you. No, I started the whole thing. Yeah, but you Are real about it. I was real. You know, if you really had to fuck somebody it would be Lewis. I know it would be he was bugging you to that So you you pick me out of spite of him Anyways, um, who's the better kisser though? Oh, I can kiss we've already you cannot kiss you, but I'm a shit mouth

No, my lips are fine. No, it's I don't know the small shitty lips Who'd you rather kiss me or Joe? Oh, that's hard come on Big lips you have a small mouth Joe is probably going to be more successful. Sweet as breath this feels like dog. No, I got my two effects. I got my two effects. My breath smells great. You got a fix so hard.

Yeah, it's got to pull that on my mouth. All right, two years ago. That's great. I'm not going to stay any more. I had a dead tooth. It was brutal. I remember that. Remember we got the intervention.

You had a tooth invention for me. We had a tooth invention because I had a fucked up tooth and I was in that I was doing it. And I had no idea. He's like, take your breath stinks. I was like, my breath doesn't stink. And then everyone in the room looked down at their shoes and I was like, fuck.

But then we had a breath stink. We had a dentist from the Bronx. Remember? And they'll tell me, Al's dad. He did shit in his apartment in the Bronx. And did he do it? It was not, I went to a real dentist. Okay, good.

Yeah, good for you. Did you keep the tooth? No, it shatter out in a little fucking piece. Oh, no. We could have made a necklace out of that smelly thing. No, it was brutal, dude. It was bad. I had a dead tooth, it was, yeah.

But now my, my, I got a great smile. Yeah, you do. I got a beautiful lips. Let me see. Nice. Yeah, so there's no, I just haven't beat me in the fucking name. Hey, you want to make that look at that position.

Kiss, kiss Mike. No, my kiss and Mike. Kiss him on the cheek, bro. No, I don't have to beat me in the fucking hey want to make out a little position kiss kiss Mike No, my kiss in my just kiss a moment. Hey, bro No, I don't want to work to come over It's because each other and then I'll decide in my mind Dustin Would you get a record kiss right now? You guys kiss and then we'll have a good time again cuz I get me to do I'll get me to I get an napkin you fucking lumpy put you know what greatest show. I'm sorry I got you want to use this oh my god. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's not funny bucks, it's 13. I'm alright, Joe, what do you got?

I got herpes. So that's for anything more. I'm on season two of the standups on Netflix. I'm believe right now it's streaming live. Hold on, hold on, I think I wrote down some dates right here. We got you dates right here. I'm coming, but I haven't updated my website. I gotta do that.

I'll be at the Syracuse Funnybone June 7th through 10. And then I'm at Denver Comedy Works. June 14th through the 16th, Montreal Comedy Nest, June 28th through the 30th, so Denver, Montreal, Syracuse, all coming up. Are you doing, Jess Philafs this year? No, I'm in Dublin. So, oh, so you're going to be in Montreal the week before Montreal or during Montreal? No, a few weeks. That's June.

I do. I do. I do. I do. I am. Okay. I'm in Montreal, comedy, that's June, yeah. All right, man. And Joe, thanks for coming on. Thank you. We got a big, we got the bushcraft party boys week. Night coming up. You got to get your tent. Yeah, I'll help you pick that stuff after the show Okay, great. Yeah, they're patreon Yes, Joe's patreon Two days of stories there you go. All right, let's go Louis J Gomez Gomez comedy I come I don't have that website

I don't see that those are old ones. Yeah, I'll go back. Let me see it. I like I got up to that too. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I'm putting together a tour for this fall. I'm going everywhere, including England, I believe. So look at that. Good day, mate.

Hello, hello, hello. Hello, the reek of my son. We got teeth too. Skank fest, it's officially on sale, guys. We're very close. I think by the time this comes out on iTunes, it might even be sold out. So get your tickets right now if you're watching live. Hopefully, they're still tickets available.

Skankfest NYC.com, it's a two day long party nonstop, just hanging out, four different stages. It's unlike any other comedy festival in the world. I'm telling you right now, Bob, you've done it before. You did it two years in a row, this is your third year coming back. It's actually really a fucking great hang. I mean, the shows are great.

I mean, of course, but the hang hang is I had to leave and I want to Stay in like three hours and I was I was supposed to go home and do a bunch of shit And I just I literally walked out and I was like, eh fuck that and I walked back in and lit up a cigar I hung out for another three hours. It was a blast. We got a new venue this year, three times. All fans are hanging out. My favorite, my favorite, my favorite for comics in the world are there. It's one of the most hangover. So, where is it? It's gonna be a Brooklyn Bazaar at July 14th and 15th.

Yeah, it's a huge, do something. I love the heavy on, dude. It's so much fun. July 14th and 15th. All right, I'll pick a look. Yeah, you should do. It's really, it's really a fun time. And I'm telling you right now, it's unlike any other experience,

I've been to all these comedy festivals, it's definitely unique. Also. You know what I want to do one time it might be queer, but if we could watch, we should just pick a movie and we all watch it together and just fucking heckle the movie. Yeah, I do like Mr. Sons Theater.

Yeah, it's something like that with some cool movie or something. I don't know, we do what the media live. Why don't we have, why don't you have Dave do his porn thing from there? What? Watching porn.

Let me remember that show. Oh, Dave's old porn. And Dave's old porn. You should do that at Skatefest. He was the only one. So I'm doing the card, the game show that he made possibly. Oh, fucking, oh my god, those unbelievable. You should do that.

You should fucking get that. Well, baby, don't you worry. Goddamn comedy jam is coming back naked roast battles coming back We got a lot of crazy shit naked roast battle. Yeah, you want to do it. Oh say yes No pictures no cameras nothing. Yeah, you know No, no, just the other it's gonna suck cuz you know she's got some weird mall somewhere that we're all gonna puke on Some fucking big black ball on our left cheek. From all my sunburns.

Yeah, so yeah, check out my other podcasts. And me and you got a big show on my list. Yeah, oh yeah. More Tampa. I'll plug it, I'll plug it. Yeah, guys, we just got to skanks, real ass podcasts, and believe you me are my podcasts. So go to gastagelonnetwork.com.

You guys can go subscribe if you want all the exclusive content, but you can get all the podcasts for free, right, a castassesilonnetwork.com. You guys can go subscribe if you want all the exclusive content, but you can get all the podcasts for free Reddit Gassesilonnetwork.com. Very funny dude, thanks coming on dude. Good to see you. All right, Mike, what do I got? All right, man. Well, you have a shout out for the Patreon first of all.

Well, please, yeah, go to Patreon. All you Patreon, we do. Go, what's his name? Pat, is it all the thing? Oh, it's on my, check this out. You guys, Patreon, I just to thank you guys for joining my Patreon We have live from the shed. We just shot two more episodes Keith Robinson Russ Meierson one of the biggest casting agents in New York City Emmy award winning casting and came up to my shed. We did a great show with him

Keith Robinson came up. It was unbelievable this now in two weeks We have Ron Bennington the great Ron Bennington's live in the shed. The show's going great. The fans, you're amazing for being part of my channel. I got a one on one up there. Lewis, we're doing a one on one. I want to do it this week. I got to do it. I mean Lewis is going to do a one on one. I got one Joe up there right now. So go to patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. Make sure you become a member today. If you are a member of write this, this, what is it? What's it called? Lipson.

Do you know what, dude? Premium thing where you donate a dollar, what a get off, cancel it. Stop. Listen to me again, get off. Go to patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. Become a member there. Support me over there. It's the same thing.

They have different tiers, but it's the same exact thing. You get the podcast Wednesday night. You get live from the shed. You get the one on ones. We got some other stuff that's going up there that's original content only for Patreon members. Again, patreon.com slash Robert Kelly, go there, join today. Get off, lips in if you're aopeless and just get off of it.

Figure it out. Don't text me. There's a thing in the app. Just unsubscribe and go over to the Patreon. I want to thank, right now, Pat Burke. You are the shit, the ultimate dude. You know what, dude? I donated 25 dollars.

Dude, Pat Burke, you are the man. Thank you for becoming a member of the channel. I hope you enjoy everything. I'm gonna do a live video from there there too. So I just figured out me and Zach are gonna figure out how to do live video to patreon channel members only. So that's coming to we got a bunch of new stuff happening. What else do we got Mike? All right you're gonna be at three house mate well. That's just if you listen in live it's this Saturday night I'm with Brendan Brendanan uh... brendan uh...

uh... shesagula who i love to kill this weekend at uh... bananas comedy club so then we got to go to a good night rolleys is that it good night is that what's in rolleys or kernel good night july good night it's just good night's now i could i'm going to north carolina i'm going to westbury theater with Rich Voss. I got McCurdy's in June. I am at the Vermont Comedy Club in June 15th.

Again, I'm at, I got a bunch of pussy cats stuff. I'm at the Laughing Scull, Georgia, June 27th, and Atlanta. I'm at Cap City for the first time in June, the 28th to the 30th comedy shop. And then, Just For Laffes, the 18th until the 29th. I will be hosting the nasty show at Just For Laffes. And I'm doing a gala and I'm doing a live YKWD from up there.

And then me, I'm doing the Caltech cruise. If you haven't been on the Caltech cruise, you should go on it. I'm doing the Caltech cruise. And then me and Lewis Gomez, Lewis J. Gomez, are doing Tampa. The 11th through the 13th. So Thursday, Friday, Saturday,

he's doing Saturday, he's doing the late show headlining, and he's also, I'll plug your up, of course I'll plug your shit, but yeah, so he's actually headlining one of the nights or two of the nights, so make sure you buy, if you're a fan of mine and a fan of his,

buy, go to the show of my show and try to get one of his shows, too, if you can't, if you can't just go to my show. But, or I'll never bring him again, how's that sound? I his shows, too, if you can't, if you can't just go to my show. But I'll never bring him again. How's that sound? I'll never know. I'm kidding. So go check out robberkilllive.com.

I got a brand new website going up this week with a bunch of new stuff on there. What else? We got Mike, what do you have? This is coming in week. If you're watching live, I'll be at Lafayette Loud in San Antonio with Big J. Olkerson. Great show. Great club.

And Mike is hilarious. Yeah, I'll be. Sucks at in great show. Yeah. Great club and Mike is hilarious. Yeah, I'll be a sax and rose battle. Super funny. Oh, real quick. I mean, I just want to say, I mean, Gabby did an awesome job. I think she should really look into doing rose battle. She did really well. Thank you.

She's someone who should really like, she'd be one of those killers on there, like up there with Rose Bud and all those other guys. Yeah, I think she was awesome. Oh, what a nice guy. Nice guy. I love you. Oh, thank you.

You're turning red. Oh, you're amazing. Red. How he's blushing. Oh, yeah, I kind of am I don't know I feel I just I'm not gonna be me. You know what buddy? You are good at being mean I'm not in your comedy you're you know what rose battling is not for everybody and you know that and just fucking who gives a shit Yeah, but it was fun. I appreciate Lewis give me the chance and to find out what I'm not good at But still fucking great. You're gonna look back on that bomb Every month because we're gonna play it on the show. Oh, yeah, every month. So many drops I'm so wait to have just I want I want the next show ending with his one of his jokes

Oh, we got and then The in two weeks. I'll be at the all-pastachomic strip with Nick Gira and They have us back for doing their core comedy a project. They come on in Dallas and June Yeah, if you haven't seen Mike, please check him out and they have us back for doing their cool comedy at Project A.C.A.L.A.L.N.D.S. in June. Yeah, if you haven't seen Mike, please check him out. I'm gonna try to put him on some of my shows coming up. Gab, what do you got? I have my monthly show at the Ways Station in Brooklyn,

May 23rd. Is it your time of the month? That's a great show for a... That's a good idea. A great name for a guy. No, it's called Jiggy with it. I do. And then I started a new podcast with Katie Hannigan called a pod

calyps. So check that out too. That's a good one. All right, Zach, what do you got? Zach, the new guy, Zach, the new guy had to say it again there. Well, you really didn't. We got it. No, you guys are the best fans of the world. Thank you for listening to everybody on this podcast. If you see any of these people live comedy near you

Please go support us do our live stand-up. That's what we do go check it out These shows are always for free, but our stand-up we need you to support us So thank you all the fans that came out this week in a banana YKW defense and and make sure you mention YKWD to these guys when you see him We'll see you next week. You know what? and YKWD to these guys when you see them. We'll see you next week. You know what, dude. for all the best podcasts on the internet. And they're all free, and they're all free.