Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Are You Garbage? | Scrambies

Episode Date: November 23, 2020

H Foley and Kevin Ryan from the Are You Garbage Podcast come on to talk egg preferences, cancelling Baby Yoda and the horrors of the belly button hernia! Go to Patreon.com/RobertKelly to see YKWD Earl...y, Live, AND Unedited! Extra ten minutes every week, this episode we got an extra 20! New Episodes arrive every Sunday night For advertising opportunities email advertise@thelaughbutton.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hoy es un día de eso de no saber cómo va a acabar el día. Donde nadie pregunta a dónde viene, sino por qué no te viene. Y una ronda es el tiempo que pasa en preno, conocernos y no creer olvidarnos. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos lia. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos encuentra. Maú, la vida es más vida cuando nos encontramos. Encuentra los bares de Madrid la dicción especial de Madrid nos lia. Un humenaje de número más que de Madrid. The pack of white key WD podcast, white KWD's back again
Starting point is 00:00:45 Old school back in the day, we're all starting before them all I'm key white key WD's, this podcast is so fun and crazy, and there's no rules Shut up, you're ruining this! We're the block band, I'm sorry, it's a comedy podcast, this is an NPR That's the part that none, is there any better show? This the original. The original. The original. The original.
Starting point is 00:01:09 The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original.
Starting point is 00:01:17 The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. The original. It's a Monday at 3.30. You know what to podcast five from my shed We have a very special show for you every week's a goddamn special show. I mean, let's be honest This is the only podcast
Starting point is 00:01:37 That's actually trying to be funny the whole time Okay, I mean all these other podcasts that you listen to they get millions of fucking downloads and Fucking millions of dollars. I mean they're literally pontificating shit They're not trying to be funny. They're not trying to bust balls They're not trying to fucking have a good old fucking time fucking be Accepted into the mainstream. One thing you can count on,
Starting point is 00:02:09 that I'll never be mainstream. They got a how much I've tried. You are mainstream, you just thought HBO. That's true. Max. HBO Max. It's a Max of the... There he is.
Starting point is 00:02:22 There was no good program. Oh, look who it is. Sorry, hey gang. Sorry, I game. Oh, look who it is. Sorry. Hey, gang. Sorry. I'm going to put your background. Thanks to studio. Look, let me.
Starting point is 00:02:30 I mean, that's the new studio. Now, let me tell you something. I've been in this game for a long time. I am the original podcast on the East Coast. That's not fucking, let's just not get around that. That's awesome. Yeah, for sure. The bit of that is the net intro that intro that you do Bobby is unbelievable.
Starting point is 00:02:48 That's not it. I mean, he on first, that in and in and in and fuck everybody. That's not it. That's not it. It's that in and in. I started social media. That's the fact. It's a fact.
Starting point is 00:03:03 The fact. Oh, I'm getting a fucking text message from Most Already. Slide echo from you, you fucking fat fuck that I am. Hang on. Put on those headphones, baby. Here's the problem. Give me one sec, guys. I got these headphones. Oh, I got to clean my fucking studio.
Starting point is 00:03:23 This is just ridiculous. So unprofessional. Almost like being late. Hey buddy. Well, hey, I you know You are garbage being late is garbage. I know man, and I'm very rarely late I thought I had chrome downloaded I didn't I had it was a whole browser thing, you know I'm so Mishmarded, I don't know how he see this show is I'm so smish-marted when it comes to this It's just like whatever's on the thing I just run with I don't know what that means, but listen retarded The fat one's usually the fuck up. Oh, he is no I mean there's no getting around that he for sure is the fuck up of the situation. Who are we talking about? You.
Starting point is 00:04:06 We're talking about you. Sorry. Sorry. Fair enough. Guys, try to interrupt. I just want to take care of it for a cabin. Can you make sure your mic is selected? It may be easy here.
Starting point is 00:04:15 I just double checked it was. And the audio is coming in hot. Hold on, let's see. Wait, I like. This is all stuff that's taken care of. Buddy, I'm sorry, man. I really, I am. I'll just come to victim. I'm going to hit you for a little bit. Just stay. Stay.
Starting point is 00:04:32 Get him, Bobby. I'm the victim. I'm the victim. You're not the victim. I'm the victim. All right. Don't pull the Gabby. What a Gabby. What the fuck was that? A Gabby. What the fuck? I just did in the columball. Why am I the victim? What a Gabby what the fuck was that a Gabby The Columbo my I
Starting point is 00:04:48 Want to say for my fucking mug by the way Anyways, yes, I let's let's just be honest There's certain fucking I mean I love your podcast because it's a fucking goof the whole time sure You're having fun the whole time. That's right. You're not, you're not, hey, what do you think about Biden's show? Who gives a shit? No politics. How do you, how do you feel about, you know, and if you do do something like that, it's just a fucking funness in it. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. Like I can fucking trash both of you's fucking cock suckers and chubby bastards
Starting point is 00:05:26 that everybody likes and the receding handline pale guy. Hey, it's pretty good. It's pretty good. I'm careful if it's you leave the show or not. I mean, they really don't get it. Now here's a problem with your show that I wanna bring up. One of you could become very successful from the show.
Starting point is 00:05:44 Like Hollywood seems to come in and will pluck somebody from something. They never like the both. It's very rare to they do the, let's take both of these guys. They usually want one person more than the other. What happens if you guys have a contingency plan? 100%. It's going to be him. I don't want anything to do with Hollywood.
Starting point is 00:06:03 This is it. I bet the house on this Wait hold on tell me truth. There's a contingency plan, but it's not if Hollywood comes not Yeah, he's better. He has a fucking dying there He is a backup plan that replaced me if I die I got I got even five dance on fucking speed dial He's got a we got it. We have a lease for a year in an office in Midtown, Manhattan. Obviously, that's serious money.
Starting point is 00:06:27 He wasn't, you know, he's a, he comes from, from money. He's not going to make that investment without a backup plan. He knows that I had to go get a physical. He made me go get a physical. I got, I got an executive life insurance plan on him. Yeah. Did you really? Yes.
Starting point is 00:06:44 The cheapest 319 a month. What do you talk about? I got a lot of money invested in this. By the time you get $2,300, Bobby. And two lucky spots in New York comedy club a month. So did you really, you didn't take life insurance? I thought about it. That would be insane.
Starting point is 00:07:01 Yeah. I know. I really, I really put it around as these little agalities behind it. I'm going to really poked around to see the legalities behind it. I'm gonna get fucking mush on the life insurance policy. Give him a like support first. Yeah. Life alert. I don't like mush with no mic either. It's real creepy. I keep thinking he's behind me. It's scary. It it is scary I'm behind that open door
Starting point is 00:07:25 right now all right listen here's I really do love I love I mean look I get podcasts but when they I just you know people just talking without the the the element of me telling you used to shut the fuck up or you suck or for me to go on a fucking thing and you guys to go fucking blew. I don't I just love the honesty in certain podcasts where the you don't let the other person get phony. You know what I mean? Sure. Yeah. It's it makes it's cringeworthy to see that happen. Yeah, it's just, but people seem to love that for some reason. Yeah, and you know, when we first met you, you know what I mean? And you had us on the first time, you know, that was, that was,
Starting point is 00:08:14 that was evident. And you know, we're, we're kind of like blind to people. Like the way we were in Philly was like that. We kind of somewhat emulated to what you and your crew operated in New York. And you know, that's, that's the way we're always gonna be He's always gonna shit on me. I'm always gonna shit on him Just the way it is and someday he'll be right and you'll die from a heart attack and you'll have and finance
Starting point is 00:08:35 Well, I just got my I got my EKG came back a hundred percent normal blood pressure is normal pulses normal Wait perfect Yeah, let me comics. I know that had to said the same thing. Yeah, Mike the Stefano said that today's week where he died. I got a heart of an 18 year old. Jesus, I got to go for a checkstex right tomorrow. I just went for a cat scan. Here's the problem. If yeah, that when when I put a picture of me in a hospital up, I get 19 phone calls of concern. It's serious.
Starting point is 00:09:11 It's not just like fun content. It's like, fuck, something happened to buy. I was just getting a cat scan because I'm getting my belly button, hernia fixed. That's attractive. What's wrong, Gabby? You have a belly wrong, Gabby? You have a belly button, hernia?
Starting point is 00:09:27 Yeah, I call that a bad thing. That's not even happened. From being fat and trying to get up on a deep couch. Too many guys, Kays. They got to do it with a bean bag one night. I got my wife got this couch. I don't like a big deep couch, but she got it too low to the ground. She got this, you know, really deep couch. And it's awesome. It's something
Starting point is 00:09:50 like a bed in the living room. But when you try to get up, you got a fucking cuff. Throw yourself. Oh, yeah. And me at three sixty at three, three hundred and thirty six. 336. Why would you do that? Why would you do that? Why would you do that? That's not funny. Jesus. That's harassment. Is that mine? That's a lie. Take it down.
Starting point is 00:10:11 We got a button cam on Boby under the desk. Boby, when you push that, does Candy come out of your mouth? He's like a dispenser. No, it only comes out when I'm angry. Like a shrimp doll. I remember Max was Max was on the country with the Max started playing with he goes, this you belly it is. That sounds like it could be like an old school term for it. Well, you know what? The one I got is
Starting point is 00:10:39 actually the most common it happens to a lot of people. And it's it's not like my intestines, it's just it's a little tear on the belly button. The wall is stomach and it's like fat. That's just that's just a little fat. It looks like it's pro outie. It's yeah, but the ones that are really bad, are when the literally the intestines come out of the hole and they're on the outside of the stomach most all one of those up I am the leader I am your boss. Please listen to me. Don't listen to the hay-haired Okay, I'm a wizard. I've been promoted. I'm looking. It's just a lot of more for our little kids and those are kind of sad Yeah, bring it up. Why not? Yeah, come on. Fuck them. Oh
Starting point is 00:11:28 Come on, let's just see you get her knees Come on one two three go Come on, let's try to get mush Come on, let's try to get mush Yeah, you gotta all right much. Maybe we shouldn't have done that I was going into it with the best intentions. Don't let's make this funny. I feel like I'm gonna cry That kids look that kid's been dead for years. It's fun. Greg Shepherd wrote the turkey's done. I mean, listen, dude. Yeah, some of them, some of them can be bad. My, my is not that bad though. I'm getting
Starting point is 00:12:19 it done because I, yeah, I'm trying to lose weight and I don't want to lose weight and still have this little nugget sticking out. And so my doctor, a friend of mine, our pan who works at, uh, hangs out at my cigar bar. He, that's his specialty. So it's like, I can fix that for you. There's nothing better in life when you, you, your friend is a doctor and you'd be like, I'll take care of that. Just come on down.
Starting point is 00:12:44 Is he doing it for free? No. No, I'm in sure it's okay. And is a doctor and can be like I'll take care of that just come on down Free now my she's no I'm insurance. Okay. All right Jesus Christ. You so fucking project rat He really doesn't know anything about he went to the doctor. He's like didn't charge me I'm like cash register on the way out I brought 300 on his incantios me. I they were going to bang me out because my deductibles like 1800 and I got to pay that before they'll pay anything. So I figured I had a break them all some. You know you can stop in between words and take a breath, right? Well, it's called the period of comma. You can use these things so you don't die in this podcast And they bring the thing out. I thought I was gonna pamper before it all If he dies as a department I don't make as much money. So I need
Starting point is 00:13:38 I'm gonna be on the job side. I got a pretty pretty big umbrella policy role. Yeah, I'm getting it fixed the December 10th. I'm getting it fixed. Just in time for this. Is it like an outpatient type thing? Are you in and out? Are they supposed to? You're supposed to be in and out, but sometimes you have to stay if something goes wrong. So he looked at it. I did the CAT scan and he looked at it and he said, it's it's it's affixable. So, but they can never, doctors, because people with such fucking garbage people, as you say,
Starting point is 00:14:09 they can't give you, back in the day, they'd be like, dude, I take care of it, no problem, you're all set. They can't do that anymore, because they've been sued so many times, they always have to give you the percentage. They always have to go 20% of the people, it fails, you'll have to stay in the hospital and you'll probably die. They have to say, they have to give you that you might die.
Starting point is 00:14:31 Because I could sue them. I really, you said it was gonna be great. You said I was gonna be fine. Now I got a fucking, you know, a scar from my neck down to my my belly button because he had to take my intestines out, but he said it, he's gonna say they did that with my eye too what happened to your eye I got I served you like 10 years I'm not that fat because it's coming out of his eye you got an eye her any you gotta come back to soda So did it. Play off the single. You just had to come to an end your ear too. What's that? I just, I did. You're right.
Starting point is 00:15:10 You see this. I got like intensive surgery in a green room on an Instagram live one night. Oh, I saw that. This is why you're the ball. That's why you're in charge. You're running things because you, I mean, even on this show, you just keep it at moving. I mean, he's just sitting there looking for things to do
Starting point is 00:15:27 look at him he's looking for things to eat or something yeah look at him he can't even keep eye contact look at the snacks look at the ball to play with it's like having a fucking baby burn a little bit he's like he's like I call him like an old bird he's like an old labrador you know what I mean he's got hip display shade while the downstairs. Me and you that eye contact, he's all over the fuck. Okay. He's like, he just, it's chewing on catnet. What the fuck? I mean, it's a nicotine gum, man, it gets me all jacked up. Got me on the nicotine gum. Leave the doctor scared to shit out of me. Still man, I can't smoke
Starting point is 00:16:02 anymore. Yeah, everyone knows that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where did you learn that? I don't know. I just told you that. I would bake tobacco too much. Me and Philip Morris playing the links. Told me it wasn't addictive.
Starting point is 00:16:18 Dude, you smoke cigarettes? I'd not need more. That's what I said. Like noon did hey. No, this weekend, I stopped this weekend. Good for you man. I was a lot was about last time I had a cigarette that's good for you, dude This is Bobby fucking rips his knife. I know you were smoking a pipe before Yeah, I smoke yeah, I got to stop to what's out all about with your party. It's crazy Sometimes I'll go there at literally 10 a.m. and he's smoking a cigar.
Starting point is 00:16:48 Yeah, that's wild. Yeah, I'm a goddamn man. That's what I'm gonna do. Do you know that I was nothing to do with it? I'll give you the cigar. What's with the pipes? What are the real men? Real fucking men smoke pipes.
Starting point is 00:17:00 Yeah, 1934, what's not now? When men were fucking men. What are you on? You weren't even alive. You weren't alive. Listen, that's when men were men, okay? So I take that as a compliment. You say that as an insult.
Starting point is 00:17:13 Your generation says that I say that as a compliment, okay? I got a flag hanging outside. I got a fucking pike. I got some cherry tobacco. I got a fucking cigar. I'm ready to go. Okay, George. I got a cowbell. I'm ready to go. Okay, George. I got a cowbell.
Starting point is 00:17:26 Yeah. I want my dinner. I got a wooden tooth. The whole thing is going to go. I want a peg leg. peg leg in a harpoon. I do have to stop though. I'm going to slow down on the tobacco.
Starting point is 00:17:41 I think tomorrow I'm going to not smoke for the rest of the week. The only thing I'm worried about is that like yesterday I didn't smoke. The other, yes, the two days I tried not to smoke any tobacco and either cigar or pipe and my, I get very testy. Oh, yeah. I get very, you know, like, you know, fucking, and I'm trying to figure that out. I don't wanna hurt anybody emotionally. Jesus. I don't wanna break mush. This guy's partners.
Starting point is 00:18:13 You wanna play a cool big guy? He was like, I don't wanna hurt anybody. I'm gonna play a cool one, all right? I'm gonna cup a decaffin some watercolors or something like that. I'm gonna go with it. I don't have no money. I painted today. You did?
Starting point is 00:18:36 I did. I painted a...max made me a pipe holder for my pipes. That's not. You can paint about the pipes. That's... No, he made... I can't have to make sure he's smoking a pipe. Painful, good rainbow.
Starting point is 00:18:50 Just switch it up. But, you know, here's the thing though, is that you do go to these, you know, you got your shit tested. I gotta go for blood work. And the inevitable is coming, where you're gonna go and get this blood work or you're going to get a test and go, I'm going to need to talk to you. Yeah, I mean, I'm going to go on that phone call right now.
Starting point is 00:19:12 She said I won't call unless there's something wrong. There's no way there's not something wrong. My cholesterol has to be through the roof unless I'm some kind of miracle modern science. You know, it's funny that certain guys, big guys, like that, all that fat holds them together. And then when they lose weight is when they wind up dying. Right, biggest fear, man, my biggest fear
Starting point is 00:19:35 that I'm gonna stop doing, stop drinking, stop smoking, and then I'm gonna die. Like right now my body's operating on some weird packed with the devil. What are you talking about? He's a first place. I'm telling you. Crazy person.
Starting point is 00:19:49 I couldn't believe you. I heard your first, your first fear should be heart disease. Not the fact that you really have to wait and then die. That's crazy. That's what happened. Bobby doesn't always happen to the guy and it's always before their birthday. I really have to. I believe that.
Starting point is 00:20:02 I believe that. John, you're doing a two guys. All right, right skinny people you two fucking twinks I'm not skinny anymore by the way I put it all You're a My intestines came out of my belly button. Okay, talk to me when that happens. Okay. Man. But what happens? Listen, John Panette lost weight.
Starting point is 00:20:30 Gone. Kevin Meeney lost weight. Yeah. Yeah. Right? Look at, you know why they died though? It's because they were fat. It's not because they got skinny.
Starting point is 00:20:41 Do you know what I mean? That's pretty good. No, that's not true. It's more of the past.. Do you know what I mean? That's pretty good. No, that's not true. It's more of the past than the present. I know they, I think that it's a jinx. I think it's the fat jinx. Yeah, you gotta keep going, baby. No room for quitters in the USA.
Starting point is 00:20:56 Yeah, keep running. Bobby, you're losing weight. You're looking fantastic. Thank you very much. It's all I was fishing for. I was fishing for. Dude, being my life or track in the progress, I'm like, look at Bobby's losing weight.
Starting point is 00:21:11 But this week I actually fucking I spiraled out of control. Mike Calta gave me monkey bread and Tampa. And then my wife made a corn chili when I came back. I've been losing my fucking mind, but today I'm back on I'm done Nice. I'm done today Salad for lunch. There you go. Next for breakfast. Great nice healthy dinner I'm gonna work out today in my shed. Everything's gonna be back on fucking track Today and then next Thursday Everything's gonna get thrown out the fucking window. I'm gonna stuff my fat face all day
Starting point is 00:21:46 Well, you can have a cheat day. I can't. I wish they said that with sex addicts. Just one day. Just one day I could just go. Blow everybody. Blow everybody. Blow everybody. Blow everybody.
Starting point is 00:22:00 It's like it's 2020, man. Whatever is clever, you know? Even but all we do.'m just gonna go suck I did That's Bobby's voice is just blowing dudes Yeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna have like a free call wash at a truck stop It's just gonna be just me holding a sign with Daisy dokes. I'll suck a dick Veterans today is my cheat day That's all that's all says. Better make it better make
Starting point is 00:22:27 here by 11.59 or your screw. This is so funny though I have a great plan. No cocaine. Luke cocaine does not make you lose weight trust me it doesn't. I was not that's dark chocolate. This is what a natic. This is what a piece of shit that you have dark chocolate, no? Well, I shouldn't. Why do you have that on you? Like a cop badge. What are you doing?
Starting point is 00:22:52 What are you doing? That's what I'm saying. You just blast that on your jacket. Just blast that on your jacket. Just blast that on your jacket. Hey, that's what you're talking about. That's all over. Pull over.
Starting point is 00:23:03 You know how much food you're eating fatso Chocolate cherry too look at you. Oh man. You're cherry tobacco cherry chocolate. I bet you're a big cherry garcia guy What I don't think it's got it's the best there is no better ice cream than cherry Absolutely, are you nuts? Cookies what your cream blows it away? What's your poison, Tubby? What do you like, huh? Cookies and cream. The best ice cream. Cookies and cream. That's the best. It's not garbage. Cookies and cream is the shit. Yeah. Cookies with ice cream. Well, what are you talking about? You want
Starting point is 00:23:37 some exotic shit that doesn't exist in the universe? You can take my ice cream and make it anywhere. I can get cookies with ice cream, mush them together, and my ice cream exists. That's the way a natural ice cream should be made. Yours is fucking, you got to make your own cherries. Now there's other shit in there. Now there's not. There is. Yeah, there's some other shit. Yeah, this is some vibranium. Was a Marvel joke. I, we got it. Speaking of Marvel, you guys were talking about the Mandalorian before I, in the, in the, before we started the show.
Starting point is 00:24:13 Oh, yeah. And Gabby, you have no idea what this is. No, is that a guy who just plays the mandolin? You cannot know, you have to know what it is. Come on. I don't know. I am earnestly telling you. I know. I mean, you two to know what it is. Come on. I don't know. I am earnestly telling you I know I'm here. What do I mean, you two have lived completely different lives.
Starting point is 00:24:29 That doesn't matter. It's not in your own way in your fucking comic books. I know who fucking Kendall Jenner is. She should know who the Mandalorian is. It's out there. It's on Disney Plus. I don't have Disney Plus. I'm a grown woman.
Starting point is 00:24:42 And you know, here's what a phone is she is. If she booked the part on the tomorrow She'd be giving an interview. I love the series. I love I had to hide the fact that I was a comic book nerd. I used to have to Read my friends would have made fun of me. I was bullied back. I'll give her that that's what you got to do baby They don't pay it to be in the project. They pay you to promote it What did you promoted. What did you get?
Starting point is 00:25:07 You just get a manager. He takes he was famous. His his his outlook on show business like 1970 show business by the way. I'm pushing Gerritol and shit. Like a fucking. Hey kid, never eat before a show. Yeah, he's got a guy. We got a yellow or tracking on air. You see? Never
Starting point is 00:25:20 buy Coke from a key grip. I'll tell you that kid. I Love the Mandalorian. I John Favaro and I guess I was wrong John Favaro is The motherfucker of comic book movies. He just knows how to do this shit And I mean, I know Star Wars, I'm not a Star Wars nerd, but I never in a million years would fucking give a fuck about Boba Fett and Mandalorians, but then him and the other guy, mush, who's the other guy that is the real genius behind all this? Name is Dave Folloni.
Starting point is 00:25:59 That's the guy, the weird guy with the cowboy hat. Yeah, he works for a in does guy walk a wrench Well, he went and hand picked him Correct. I find it alone. He did Yeah, yeah, and then they him and Filoni did this together and it's one of the best shows on TV Yeah, and now it's a hit. There he is. What a fucking what a weird mouth Yeah, there's a lot of up. He's single. Huh? He's dressed like four different people. He's got
Starting point is 00:26:36 the face of a bond villain in the head of a cowboy. I mean, there's suits off the rack too. I'll tell you that. There's so many. There's so many reality shows that he could be part of. Yeah. I mean, on the last game alone, adventure show, Texas House flipping show, a great hunting show.
Starting point is 00:27:00 There's so many avenues for this outfit that I kind of looks like a gay man. It's a little queer eye Yeah, just he's a so him a genius man. He really is he's a genius and I he explained the the worst movies in Star Wars apparently was the the prequels Mm-hmm everybody hated and there's a video of him and I know this because Greg Stone Who I love told me about this guy and he said that he Explains these movies to make you go. Oh my god Everything makes sense. Yeah, he's that much a savant in the Star Wars world That he can make everything go wow. This is just genius and the Mandalorian now here's the funny part
Starting point is 00:27:47 the Mandalorian is in trouble today with the social justice people why because this is so fucking gay that's one person on twitter we gotta we gotta start ignoring these people yeah but it's it's it's it but but the news picks it up is the problem. The news picks it up and runs with it. And because the little baby Yoda, which is the cutest thing on the fucking of 2020, I mean, it's the greatest thing ever. I have anxiety every show that something's gonna happen to him.
Starting point is 00:28:21 I just wanna hold him. I love him. Oh man, look cutie. I want a baby him. I love him, man. Little cutie. I want a baby Yoda. Even if the baby Yoda, if I had to get impregnated in my asshole by a Yoda monster, whatever makes those, and it came out of my peo hole, I would go through that pain.
Starting point is 00:28:37 That could be what's coming out of your belly button. That could be what's coming out of your belly button. That could be what's coming out of your belly button. If someone doesn't Photoshop that, you just, you just, you just, you just, I ain just not even try and you're worthless. But they were transporting a frog woman with her baby eggs inside of a cylinder to her husband to another planet. And baby Yoda kept eating the frog eggs because of his hungry.
Starting point is 00:29:02 And it would just suck them up. And it was cute and adorable. And but it was basically her babies, her baby eggs. They weren't fertilized yet. But he kept eating them and he kept going, hey, stop eating the fucking eggs you little lunatic. It was cute and funny. Now women, of course, you know, because, you know,
Starting point is 00:29:23 it's not a guy going to go, hey, that was wrong. That was someone's baby. Some white woman was protesting it. Yeah, she's eating it. And they're saying that it's wrong. That is somebody's child or some shit. Yeah, it's a, where are you? I ain't re-want. Oh, you do? You do, you agree with, do you? is somebody's child or some shit.
Starting point is 00:29:46 Oh, you do. You do you agree with? Do you? You're pro. I'm pro choice. Yeah, I mean, this, we get this little monster eating people. This is 2020. Bobby, I can't go sign that. I just signed a lease.
Starting point is 00:29:57 What if they would have like a cancel? Jesus Christ. He's really trying to make it. This is the first sign of failure. I don't want to give a one of you wants to make it. I know No, I thought you were gonna say that they were upset because people are also upset that the The female Mandalorians who wear armor have like have like Yeah, breastplates where they're Boomer, they're called for their boobies
Starting point is 00:30:18 That's every female super hero ever They're saying is wrong also That episode was directed by what you say about who's directed it. It was a female director that directed that episode. Yes. Ron Howard's daughter. Yeah. Bryce Dallas Howard. Yeah. And why are they mad about the tit plate? Because they got nothing better to do now. Now the fucking party's over. Now you've got to grab onto something else to fucking stay relevant It's they don't care. They're trying to keep their followers and keep their name in some conversation That's the whole situation nobody really gives a fuck they they just want to just look at me look at me
Starting point is 00:30:59 And they don't have to create a better to make something the The guy from Barstool, what's his name? Kevin Casey? Yeah, great guy. He gave a fucking brilliant rant on this shit today. I was, I mean, he gave a brilliant rant. And Mouche pulled that up. It's, I mean, spot on of just shut the fuck up. Yeah. It just dismantled the argument in five seconds
Starting point is 00:31:26 about eating eggs. You know what I mean? Because basically it was, uh, and I'm stalling till mush brings it up. Basically, it's... I need to move. Everybody. Just the Jews now.
Starting point is 00:31:42 Everybody, play your month. I'm sure about a guy in space Everybody just the Jews now It's a joke about a guy in space with the fucking alien muppet. What are we taking seriously here? Are you Jewish me? Are you Jewish? Hey, you're looking. I don't know who you're looking at both of you. I'm looking at both you. Are you Jewish? I married you though. Oh, you did okay. Muzzle. I was about to end the podcast. I What a blame you. Gabby's Jewish. I'm a Jew. Yay. Oh my god.
Starting point is 00:32:12 One. Yes, I do. Um, I got another text from fucking mush. Can't find it. What's it on Instagram? KFC from bar still. Yeah, it's called a one minute, it's called one minute man. Yeah, one minute man.
Starting point is 00:32:27 They're great. It's great because it's like, dude, if you don't, then don't eat eggs, you fuck. Don't eat eggs and don't have chicken in your salad. And he's like basically saying, we murder shit every day. So you assholes can have your parties and your little barbecues and your brunch and you're sitting there eating fucking somebody's egg. Somebody's stupid egg is in your mouth. Shit the fuck up. Yeah. It's true. I think you're right. We're just starting to pick apart everything now. Yeah. So that because there's nothing left.
Starting point is 00:32:59 That's why I'm glad it's over. You Biden's in, everybody's there. And now what? There we go. There we go. There we go. That's what you think, cancel culture can't get any worse or any more form, problem for baby Yoda. Not even a human. Not even a human.
Starting point is 00:33:22 We are now attempting to cancel fictional species from the Star Wars saga. And one of the recent episodes of the Mandalorian, this match hit on Disney Plus, Baby Yoda is seen eating frog eggs. The plot of the episode had the Mandalorian trying to give safe passage to a frog lady, who was trying to reunite with her husband,
Starting point is 00:33:39 to fertilize her eggs, to try to keep her family bloodline going. Throughout the episode, Baby Yoda is seen sneaking eggs eating them like a snath, which is kind of a funny, lighthearted, dark, humor, comic relief moment of the episode. However, this is not how many fans of the Star Wars world took tweets and articles about the misogynistic storyline and how it was insensitive to those who have gone through miscarriages, how many women who have gone through IVF, don't appreciate it.
Starting point is 00:34:06 I mean, we've all lost our mother fucking minds, A, trying to cancel baby Yoda, the most adorable and enjoyable character on television right now. And B, lacking in eating eggs to some sort of genocidal extinction level event. Do you eat eggs, do you crack open some eggs, scrambled them up and eat them? Are you worried about killing the bloodline of a chicken?
Starting point is 00:34:26 Are you, every time you eat an egg, every time you scramble up an egg, are you worried that you're beating to death a fetus and ruining some chicken's lives, ruining some chicken family's existence? No, I would sincerely hope not. Otherwise, you're a fucking asshole. So everybody out here was worried about frog lady
Starting point is 00:34:42 and her family because baby Yoda was sneaking a couple of back just So true it's not even the the rest that ran funny just the explanation of it was going through of some Frog lady So we But it's only two or three people on Twitter and then like you said, Bobby, then the media just picks it up And it's like that's not reality. It's fucking through two or three losers fucking acting like idiots I'm fucking social media and it's Yoda a male or female do we even know what?
Starting point is 00:35:16 Yeah, Yoda is only know as he's 50 years old. That's all they know and our frogs both female and male On the weekends maybe. I also want to point out Bobby and I were the only ones we were watching that when he's like, do you eat eggs and they were scribbling eggs. We were both going, yeah, I eat your eggs. And then it was the disabadiant. I'll never stop eating eggs man. As I get older, I need to think. And then it was a disappointment. I'll never stop eating eggs, man. I was like an older, I like eggs even more. Oh, dude, I can eat this. I could do it. I could do it.
Starting point is 00:35:53 I could do a dozen scrambled eggs in the morning. Like, is there anything better than getting a fun? And I know how to make my perfect sunny side up. I'm at the point where I'm a sunny set up guy. I used to be an old man. I think that comes with age. That comes with age. That comes with a black whole thing. That's what that's what that's you come with. Yeah. That comes with patience. Yeah. Yeah. Sunny set up. Crispy on the bottom. Sunny side up. No,
Starting point is 00:36:17 I got it perfected with there's no boogers. I have the hardest part. I don't have the time. I'm young, I'm still a young bug eating scrambled eggs, you know what I mean? Scramby! Scramby! Scramby! Maybe let's go! The scrambled eggs is a very young guy thing. It's like, I got shit to do.
Starting point is 00:36:35 We got to make the sound. Oh, the cheese on there. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. A little scrambled eggs on a fucking Saturday with some right toast, little candy ass. I don't want that. I don't want that every day. I get up, I get a coffee. It's like therapeutic to me,
Starting point is 00:36:45 making some scramby's and maybe some bacon. Who knows? I know I know what I got. I if you get jumbo eggs, right? Am I a fucking asshole, Bobby? What do you think? Find a little robbing eggs? What's going on?
Starting point is 00:36:57 I got to put a top guy. Those things. No offense. No offense, all right? 100%. I'm with you. I just got mad. You think I'm buying something else in Jumping.
Starting point is 00:37:06 Some people like the large. Some people get the large, which I don't have a problem with. If you're a large egg person, large is fine. But if you're gonna do eggs, jumbo eggs, and here's why, jumbo eggs, a lot of times have twins. Yeah. W. Yeah, I'm telling you, I crack three eggs
Starting point is 00:37:24 and all from the same fucking jumbo garden and all three of them are twins out and dump it out of me This is too weird They got these from a chemical plant or something Not me, I had two eggs I had two eggs this morning jumbo, it was four eggs I ate that whole family Bobby's killing bloodlines. I know, he's ruining family vacations.
Starting point is 00:37:48 Hey, here's a deal too. When you get, if you get the egg, this is what I've learned to do. Get a piece of cheese, put it on top when it's almost done, then put the cover of the pan on it, right? And throw it just a splash of water somewhere. Oh, yeah. And it melts the fucking cheese.
Starting point is 00:38:08 And immediately now, oh, mother fuck you. When you cut into that cheese and the fucking baby comes out, what do we win the baby? And the embryo. Yeah, I love it. No, the embryo. Oh, I love it. I love a nice jumbo double.
Starting point is 00:38:23 You're just describing this like a sociopath. I know. Yeah, already know. That was my breakfast two weeks ago. It's fan fucking fantastic. Who's that? What the fuck, Jesus Christ? Is that man the gas agent that's trash? That's actually a guy he pans for gold in there.
Starting point is 00:38:41 That's a prospector's gold in there. Was it gold, Hunter? That's a prospector's breakfast right there. Yeah, the kids going there. You do a great part. How would you know how to do a prospector character? That's a hard one. You want to make eggs? I know how to make eggs.
Starting point is 00:39:02 I can make the eggs for you. But you keep those god friend hands. It's way from me now. Ooh, I get to double-yook. Yeah, I struck-gooo. I'll give it a little more to a man-randy savage a little bit. Slicked an iris. Double-A. Ooh, yeah. Now, I want to talk about this. You guys have left-uh, you left gas digital. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:23 You're on your own. On our own app. And yeah, out there, a hole in the island, all buyers, it's pretty cold out here, Bobby. Built the studio. Built the studio. Built the studio right now.
Starting point is 00:39:33 I said, I think it's great. I think when you got something you really believe in, when you have something that you're a fucking thing is great, and things are going, you know what, do it yourself. That's what it was, I mean, you fucking, honestly, like Lewis, and I mean, Lewis catches a lot of shit, you know, from a lot of people.
Starting point is 00:39:52 Lewis was a fucking sweetheart. Has been nothing but fantastic and supportive of the show, even before he signed us, he was like, it's really, you know, a big supporter of it. And gas is fucking awesome. And they put a lot of money in a lot of, like a lot of comedians, you know, a big supporter of it. And gas is fucking awesome. And they put a lot of money in a lot of, like a lot of comedians, fucking pockets. But it was like, you said, like, we also,
Starting point is 00:40:11 like, I look to Lewis and I'm like, I want what he has. He built this world, you know what I mean? That he operates in same with you, same with like the history of Aeneas and all those, I'm like, I just want like our own world that we can fucking build, you know?
Starting point is 00:40:23 Right, yeah. And they're cool with you leaving. So that's great. Yeah, it was, I mean, some of the fans are a little upset, you know, they're like, you fucking turn your back on Louis J. Gomez, you fucking pussy, like all this stuff. I'm like, why do you care more than him? That's what I don't care.
Starting point is 00:40:38 Those are go mites. You can't fuck with the go mites. Everybody's been fantastic. All the listeners are super supportive of it. And, you know, great. And now, here's been fantastic. All the listeners are super supportive of it. And you know, great. And now here's the thing. Are you still doing the, we have people on and you find out if they're garbage?
Starting point is 00:40:51 Correct. Yeah. Now, is there, like what happens? When you run out of comics. Yeah, because look at my show, right? I can, I had the regs on a lot, but then it was like, well, what happens when Dan can't do it? What happens when Joe can't, what happens when these people can't do it, which wound up happening? And I was like, all right, well, I can switch it up. I can just
Starting point is 00:41:17 bring new people on. I can, I can have two people on. I can have five people on. I can have eight people on. I can have just one. Sure. You know what I mean? What happens if you guys thought about that when it's like, all right, we already had everybody here. Sure. How are we gonna fucking, how are we gonna get everybody's been on? Which, I mean, what are you gonna do? You're gonna go down to younger comics that,
Starting point is 00:41:38 people don't know, are you gonna try to reach out to famous people, what's your plan? Yeah, I mean, that is the, you know, as you know, you have to keep evolving, you know, whatever it is you're doing. But we haven't even really scratched the surface of comics. So we're not really there yet.
Starting point is 00:41:53 Holy, fully, real quick. Can he explain? Oh, go ahead, please. I go back to picking your belly button, man. I'm kidding. I've got some eggs coming up. I'm going to get it. button. Thank you, man. I'm falling. I'm getting it, dude. You're getting it.
Starting point is 00:42:09 I got some eggs coming anyway. So, uh, you got it. That's what got on fully. Yeah, so, you know, we haven't even really scratched it. All right, we got it. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh I started freaking out. We're screwed. That's what happened. We're fucking screwed. He's hanging on by a threat. He grabbed his chest. Yeah. He puts a front on a belly. Yeah. You know what we're doing. We're developing the show and believe ourselves.
Starting point is 00:42:37 Do he's panicking? I think you can take anybody. You don't need to even need them on the show. You could take fucking Chris Helmsworth or you could take Robert down to junior and go do the research on him and go, is he garbage? Yeah. You know what I mean? I mean, I'm just wondering because the show is fun to do.
Starting point is 00:43:00 I had a blast me and Calde had a blast doing it. I've liked it from the beginning. I think it's a fucking just a very unique, it's such a Philly idea. We used to do it with each other. We would ask each other about growing up and we would just be like, dude, that is fucking pure garbage. And like we just did it for years and never really like thinking about it. And then he's like, we should try to come up with a like make it a game. Yeah. And then we did it. We're did it a few times. Then we were like, let's do a fucking podcast on it. Yeah. Now what happens now you guys have been friends for how long? 10, 9, 10 years probably.
Starting point is 00:43:39 That's it friends. Friends about three weeks of that. There's a reason we're not together right now. I have work. Have you guys, no, I'm serious, dude. I'm me and serious about this. Have you guys ever been to a period where you're like, fuck him? Oh, yeah. What? If you knew the half of it, Robert, uh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:03 Well, we also both come from very, very dysfunctional families. So it's like we're used to just fucking screaming at each other, like screaming it out and then like cracking a joke and moving on. So it's like nothing really like bottles up for more than, you know, 48 hours if that and then it's like fucking, it's tip of hands with me screaming at him, but what's the longest fight you had? I don't know not talk for like a week, baby. This was really yeah, this was more I think uh things got very testy our first couple years up here, you know what I mean? Well no shit, what why what what was that? Oh, you're just you're a fucking there's no hope in sight, you know what
Starting point is 00:44:42 I mean like you do that you like you move up here and you're fucking living off dollar slices and like you have no money. Their success seems so far away from you know, you get fucking, you know, you get antsy a little bit and then we're working on projects together and you think like, oh this thing's going to be the next biggest thing and you're fucking fighting and yelling. It's, you know, it's a fucking mess. Yeah. Of course you mix a couple of perks, that's. It's, you know, it's a fucking mess. Yeah. Of course, you make a couple of perks that's in the mix, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:45:08 Yeah. A couple of girls getting involved. It's a fucking thing, Bob. He gets hungry. I ate his pinky one night. That's my winner. Did you know how? I want to go back to that.
Starting point is 00:45:23 So, you know, it's going to keep evolving. You know, we have things we want to bring back to that. So, you know, it's going to keep evolving. We have things we want to bring guests back on. And I know this sounds crazy, but we don't want to stop until we are doing it with fucking Robert Downey Jr. and Chris M's worth a new ever. You know what I mean? We see it more as like a brand, and not just a podcast.
Starting point is 00:45:40 We really want to take this thing all the way. Right, that's great. Now, what happens though? Now, because look, I go through this when I had the regs on, excuse me. That Corona. Yikes. It's baby Yoda. Cut that out, Mike.
Starting point is 00:46:02 He hacks up an egg. A whole jumbo egg. I'm going to keep the chills on. Two yolks fucking go out of zoo. I like the Gabby looks like a make a wish kid. He doesn't look like she's kind of propped up in a wheelchair. Yeah, she does. She looks like she's, hey, I always wanted to be on YKWD. I'm dying next week of leukemia.
Starting point is 00:46:24 What a garbage last wish. Oh, that's why I'm garbage. I want to hear too fat guys talking about a store where show. Yeah, we ease over comic books. Let's do it. I'm not relating to anything. That was funny. What a garbage last.
Starting point is 00:46:40 That was good. I listen. But you guys must get to, like I like him. He's the fucking funniest and fuck the other guy. Cause I get that amazhio. It's not it. We do get it. We do get it.
Starting point is 00:46:57 People say I mean to him, but it's like, you know, what? Yeah, I get that with mush. I get, you mean to mush. Yeah. But it's like, people think they have to, we don't get it as nearly as much as a lot of people But for some reason our feedback is insanely positive and when someone does say something mean everybody teams up on that I've never seen it on the internet like and now after this we're gonna get fucking trash. Thanks for bringing this up But people sometimes people feel they have to pick a side
Starting point is 00:47:24 You know what I mean? They're like, just once for years and that one, that one, the guy's thing. It's like, which is actually it's kind of fun for the listeners because we do differ in opinion on certain things. And you know, there's there's such silly things that cause like big divides in the audience, like having milk with dinner or brushing your teeth in the shower. You know what I mean? Who wants milk with dinner? How you doing? That's all right.
Starting point is 00:47:48 First up. What can I do here? That's fucked up. Why is that fucked up? It's not wine. What, it's milk. I'm a little kid. What do you mean wine?
Starting point is 00:47:59 What am I boozing up? Because her family's alcoholics, like professional. That has nothing professional what did you have for dinner growing up wine yeah she has wine yeah they put it in a sippy cup teacher me young wow that's right Gabby you come from a little bit of cash see I came from fucking pour Irish background milk was wine to us no when I grew up, my grandmother had eight kids. And I had to go to the store twice a day for two gallons of milk. Each pop, I had to go because she had five boys, two girls.
Starting point is 00:48:34 Yeah. And then we drink milk, all in breakfast dinner. You should not get it. Yeah, but your kids, he's a grown man. Yeah, he still does it. That's the problem. It's not that he did it. It's like he does it now. Yeah, no, that's trash. still does it. That's the problem. It's not that he did it. It's like he does it now.
Starting point is 00:48:46 Yeah, no, that's trash. That's it. I agree. I agree. It's trash. And also the way he says he says milk with an e. Milk. Yeah, it's going to be milk with dinner. You say a two-bobby? Yeah. What about say, first of all, you two, she do a podcast together. And he and she do a show together. Because you two fucking the leaders twats.
Starting point is 00:49:05 Yeah, no shit. I'm so trash. It's beyond, uh, yeah. I'm fresh from the Jersey Shore regardless. You're not trash. Yes, I am. Gabby, you're not. I'm not a bunch of derelicts.
Starting point is 00:49:19 I'm Hannah Montana. Half is trash. There's nothing to do. I said, by it. I'm not. I'm not a bunch of derelicts. I'm Hannah Montana. Half is trash. There's nothing trash. I'm not from a bunch of derelicts. I'm Hannah Montana, half is trash. There's nothing to talk about.
Starting point is 00:49:30 Well wait, hold on, your dad was in Bon Jovi, right? Yeah, he is. So he was trash before that. He didn't come from money, right? Yeah, so he, him, no, no, no, no, they were all Jersey dirtballs, right? They're garbage. Let me tell you about her father, fucking genius.
Starting point is 00:49:48 She could have been a doctor who's supposed to be a doctor, right? Fucking, he's a musical genius. He's written money, more money, add a jovy than he did in jovy because he's a fucking, he writes music. He's a fucking savant. And the through line uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh Uncle Vinnie's one night. He comes, this little uncle Vinnie's just sits down the crowd, gets hammered, and then it comes to me and hangs out with me for three hours at a cigar bar and as as Barry Park, just hanging out. Doesn't even smoke cigars. Just hangs out for fucking three hours with a piece of shit like me. He is.
Starting point is 00:50:39 Yeah, that's garbage. We're from the Jersey Shore forever. We're garbage. You can't be what did his dad do? His dad sold his dad was like Pursuit a happiness kind of he sold wheelchairs and medical machines and then he was yeah First responder that's trash. Yeah, but now medical devices My my fucking Listen, let me say there's more but I can't say it on the podcast. OK, thanks for not being interesting. I have to be kind of secret.
Starting point is 00:51:17 My wife's father delivered milk out of a truck that he made that said It said if you don't like if if you don't like the others try us You get it He also came up he told me one day goes listen I got something I want you to send into Chevy You'll make a million dollars off of this ad. I go, what's that? He goes, send them the sad Chevy. You can't pass it, but you can go buy it. That's pretty good.
Starting point is 00:51:57 That's all I'm part with soup is good food. But you can go buy it. Buy you. You're you. Why? Oh, no, literally. Oh my god. How do you fucking? You can go buy it. Buy it. You get you why. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Starting point is 00:52:09 How do you fucking you just come? It's impossible. It's not. I'm going to go in a Chevy. Come on. You go to Nissan. You go to Lincoln. Somebody will a little bit of class.
Starting point is 00:52:17 Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. I'm going to get a belly button, Harnia. I mean, I don't even, I mean, Gabby, I really don't believe you trash. Well, it's also the big thing is somebody doesn't matter, man. Well, yeah, no, the big thing is when you get money,
Starting point is 00:52:36 because my dad and he was the first one to make money out of anybody in the family. So it's like, what you spend it on? Like did you have like wave runners or like a golf cart growing up? Yeah, we had a golf car that would just do loops in our backyard for no reason. Scratch. That's like Ricky Bobby. Yeah, that's like he was in a rock band and 80s rock band. That's the epitome of garbage. Yeah, yeah, but not fantastic. Garbage, but garbage is nonetheless. Yeah, Joe. My mom is from Tom's River, New Jersey. Do you know where that is?
Starting point is 00:53:07 Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God. I'm really fresh. We're trash. Yeah. Have you ever worn the same underwear for a week? A week?
Starting point is 00:53:17 I would have a UTI. Yeah, she's underwear.com. Use promo code garbage. She doesn't wear that. UTI, is that your agent? No. No. No.
Starting point is 00:53:28 Hey, thanks for getting this. Go ahead. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello.
Starting point is 00:53:36 Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello.
Starting point is 00:53:44 Hello. Hello. Hello'm on the spectrum. I'm on the trash spectrum. I would say you would be you'd be less trash than your parents. You're yeah, you're less trash than your parents. You didn't buy the golf car. Yeah, I'm gonna come out of it a little better. I want to put a little bit of money. You probably've traveled to Europe and stuff like that when you're in high school. All that you have a passport. Yeah. Okay, pretty good. I wasn't fiscally raised trash, but I was personality wise raised trash. You know, culturally trash. Fiscally or fist fully? Fiscally.
Starting point is 00:54:11 Okay. I wanna come up with another show, a spin off of your show, okay? Called Are You Gay? And we kinda go. Are you just out people? We're short. We're short.
Starting point is 00:54:23 But I wanna do it right now with you guys. All right. I'm here. We can find out, are you gay? How gay? Are you side gay? How's that? Okay?
Starting point is 00:54:34 There's different variations of gay. Now, fully. Yeah. Have you ever stuck your own finger in your asshole? Within the last week. The fingers that are on your face right now Some of those medical procedures at home get to save on the deductible I touched my but hole in the last week. Yeah through you know wipe in and in the shower and stuff like that I'm talking about sexually sexually
Starting point is 00:55:01 I can't go. Oh, no, but I have, I have, yeah. You've touched your own buttole sexually. Sure. How's it make you gay? Hang on with second, you know, fucking woke ass hall. Let me just get to it. All right, that doesn't make him gay. I was gonna say my own career.
Starting point is 00:55:17 I was in a name-teach shop when I did it. So maybe that, I don't know. You're shopping for tapestries. I should have got more. But my show, my show everybody's gay by the end of it. You're shopping for tapestries. I should have got more. But my show everybody's gay by the end of it. We're all just gay. We are all gay. That's what they said.
Starting point is 00:55:31 You're on the spectrum, right? So it just gets wide in scale. What if you, what's your guess of 20, baby? What's the gayest thing you've done? Nothing really. I'm kind of meeting potatoes kind of guy. You know what I mean? That's gay.
Starting point is 00:55:44 Yeah, I'm true. Yeah, nothing. I'm kind of meeting potatoes kind of guy. You know what I mean? Yeah, I'm true. Yeah, nothing. I don't know nothing nothing nothing really Why is it fucking taught why is me? Me and potatoes. It's just sounds like it's a little yeah Yeah, that's a kid's potatoes are bigger than the meat. I can tell you that much Yeah, Bobby, you know they're gonna be be looking at your junk when you're laying on that table, getting your things done, right? Who is the doctor? The doctor.
Starting point is 00:56:13 We have a whole hospital. What do you mean he's going to be looking at it? What the fuck? They take a peek. You kidding me? They take a peek. I always flop off before any operation I had. I always kept up a little bit. Yeah, you can't shove up while you're under anesthesia. But if you get it hard enough before it'll slowly die down. I hope it looks you still got a little
Starting point is 00:56:34 You still got a little you know, heavy. Put the blood pressure arm on that thing. Set a timer on it. I don't need this anxiety. Okay. I'm gonna see Bobby's little puddle floating around. I don't need this anxiety. I don't need this anxiety. Okay. I'm gonna see Thomas a little puddle floating around. I mean, fucked up if they did film it and somehow someone hacked into it. And just got your weiner dude. The website called hospital dicks.
Starting point is 00:56:59 Oh, that's kind of. I would have to move. That's what like if somebody pants me right now, I'd have to go. I would have to move. I would, that's what, like, if somebody pants me right now, I'd have to go, I'd have to move, change the mood districts. I wouldn't care. I'm living with who I am these days. They wouldn't be able to see yours if your pants came down.
Starting point is 00:57:15 My guy's not showing off at all. He's not in front of the class, making fun of the teacher or anything. Yeah, people would think it was a belly button hurting. You got two belly buttons, Bobby. Dude, if someone pants me, like I was thinking about that in Aruba, I remember one time I was in the water with my wife before the kid and they had really big waves and I went in
Starting point is 00:57:41 and a wave. I shouldn't even have gone in because the wave literally raped my wife. I mean, she, it hit her so bad and dragged her under that she came up and her tip was out. One of her tits was out. Her bikini was down. Her bush fat was sticking out. Her fucking head, she was walking out of the water.
Starting point is 00:58:01 Like she just been sexually assaulted. And I'm like, you're dead. You're dead. You're dead. She's like assaulted. And I'm like, you're dead, you're dead. She's like, what? I'm like, you're dead, you're dead. And she's like, ah, what? I'm like, pull your city. She literally goes, I don't care. She just walked up the beach with her,
Starting point is 00:58:18 and she was so fucking shell-shocked. Then I went in after like an idiot, and it ripped my shorts off. Mommy, you're dead, you're dead, you're dead. You know when the water was getting sucked back out, I was in the water. The water was just ripping my shorts down my ankles and I was trying to get them back up. Get all filled with sand and shit there.'re heavyweighting it and it's bad. Shit sucked. I literally my dick was out and it was so small. I just flipped over on my
Starting point is 00:58:53 belly like a dolphin. I just start jumping over to your asshole. So they don't see your dick. Look at my hair. That's what I would, that would be my me. It was better than my dick show. I looked at it. I got hit by the wave, I got thrown onto the shore and then the wave was getting sucked out. The whole ocean was like a tsunami,
Starting point is 00:59:16 ripping my shorts down to my ankles. And I remember just looking down at my dick, oh no, no, no, no. And I whipped over on my belly and I just buried my pecker in the sand. Like a whole thing for having to go. And then my wife came over and had to pull my shorts up And then I had to like shimmy them up as I was lying down Did anyone ever to see my dinky
Starting point is 00:59:37 Bobby's a little binky I just I just I wish I had a dick that I could just I Remember back when I was in my 20s, I never want underwear. I wore jeans, no underwear. And my, my packer was always nice. You could take my dick out at all times and it was always hanging and it was always, I got a left or right, a nice little fill in it. It was always filled up. A nice percentage. I got to be, it's got to be the weight. I think it's the weight right? It's the way like every Every 10 pounds is like a tenth of an inch or something there
Starting point is 01:00:13 No, well every pound you lose you get because the skin around it puffs up so like it a gross It starts growing. It's like it's like high time It looks like that hernia picture. Oh my God. Yeah, it doesn't look how much time did on that is the expert. Well, my it looks like the hernia picture and plus it's you. So I mean, you're not, Bobby, you're not having as much sex as you did when you were younger. My wife, well, who are you talking to? What do you know? I'm assuming why you assuming that you know you get older you get heavier Those are worse sex addict Where are you? I guess I was
Starting point is 01:00:56 Gabby I don't know why I didn't make that up you say it all the time. Yeah, but Yeah, I was I was probably a sex addict back in my third 20s and 30s Yeah, probably I mean I did I I Like sex a little too much. I think and I know some people gonna be like well, that's impossible You can't like sex too much, but you know, we'll look at when you're dating somebody and then you have all the girlfriends And then you're going to massage parlors and then you're and then you're getting hookers. That's like that's that's a little too much. Yeah, that's a whole that can't be filled. No pun intended. Well, it was filled with fucking cupcakes and pizza. Yeah, you know, which is sad. It sucks. I mean, there's no addiction that you can
Starting point is 01:01:44 have that I can have that I can get away with which blows even the cigar thing I got to slow down on this fucking thing. That's the one thing in life that you feel you realize you can't You can't do shit to excess because it will fucking catch up to you at some point That's the only way I like to do things Me too. I love, I love just fucking stepping on the gas and just killing it. But you can't do it. How old are you, how old are you, how old are you, fully? 44. How old are you? 34. Are you guys got plenty of time? How old are you? You're not that much old. You're like, you're like, a couple
Starting point is 01:02:20 of years older than me. How old am I? 50 22 Anyone end the game that quick you fuck it cock sucka Yeah, you hit it What do I win? Do you want to see it? No, no, no, we're in the Patreon, Tommy, anyway, let's go. Oh, yeah, show it in the extra 10. Yeah, we're going to do it.
Starting point is 01:02:51 Make them pay for the goods. Bobby, don't be giving up for free. Oh, no, I got to teach you business. Let's go. This is only fans for hernias now. We're going to go into the extra 10 right now, everybody. So let's give some plugs to these guys. And if you want to be a part of the extra 10 every week on YKWD, we do an extra 10 minutes for Patreon only. You can
Starting point is 01:03:10 join the chat. You can watch the show live and unedited before it hits YouTube. And it's on Patreon. Along with the Patreon member, you get live from the shed. You get all my tech talks with Bobbie and friends. And you get the culture and Kelly show Fridays and the jerk off party we do on Saturday nights, which is patreon.com.com. Sush Robert Kelly. We're the only show that invites all the fans, the ladybugs as we like to call them, hang out with us on Saturday night, me and my calta and mush and any other comics that want to come in can hang out, hang with the fans, shoot the shit, bus balls,
Starting point is 01:03:45 fuck with each other and have a lot of fun. And that's at patreon.com.search.rovert.com. So what do you guys plug your show and your dates, whatever you want to plug? Yeah, guys, check out our U-Garbage podcast. It's wherever you get podcasts on iTunes, full videos available on YouTube. You can subscribe there as well. And then our Patreon is up and cooking. You'll get bonus episodes with guests. And with the first episode, the first bonus episode we played with our moms and called them to find out who was trashier.
Starting point is 01:04:12 It was quite a thing. It's got a little political, you know, it was a, but it was fun. Check that out. And I'm at Kevin Ryan comedy on all social media. What do you have? What do you have got a little political? What happened?
Starting point is 01:04:24 My mom had a couple of spritzers entering, you know. She commented, Arizona was called. in comedy on all social media. What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have?
Starting point is 01:04:32 What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have?
Starting point is 01:04:40 What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? What do you have? right. Yeah, I got you. They looked the way they looked the other way on certain things. What about you, Fall? What do you got? I got adh Foley on ice on Twitter and Foley grams on Instagram. Um, everything Kevin said, please check out our new garbage. And, uh, Kevin and I will be co headline me together at the Clareage Theatre, uh, December 3rd in Atlantic City, New Jersey. So grab some tickets for that and come out and see us.
Starting point is 01:05:05 Yeah. Listen, I gotta say this too, is that you see these comics doing podcasts and being funny, but you don't forget that they're bread and butter, the thing that they're fucking the best at is stand up comedy. You know, these two guys are fucking hilarious
Starting point is 01:05:21 at stand up comedy. Thank you. So, I mean, a great podcast, awesomeness, but fucking onstage, killers from Philly. So don't forget that. Check them out. Gabby, what do you got besides nine podcasts of Patreon? You have more things than fucking Andrew Schultz.
Starting point is 01:05:38 What do you got? It's true, baby. Follow me on Instagram and Twitter. Gabby is Brian. I have a podcast called Unabashed Podcast. patreon.com slash unabashed. And then I have a comedy newsletter and you could sign up for that
Starting point is 01:05:52 with the link in my Instagram and Twitter bio. And you got at Mike V. Suarez of fucking hilarious stand up comic. And then you guys need an opener. Mike V. Suarez and Gabby relax. I didn't say anything, but I was. I know you did. Very hilarious. And I have this show as a killer show.
Starting point is 01:06:12 It's in Austin. It's coming up. Moon Tower comedy. It's December 4th and 5th. The Miss Me and Miss Pat. I mean, it's been a fucking epic show. You're close. Are you close in that? I don't know. I'm and Miss Pat. I mean, it's gonna be a fucking epic show. You're close. Are you close in that?
Starting point is 01:06:26 I don't know, I'm probably Miss Pat. She's more famous than me now. So it's December 4th and 5th. Make sure you check out the website right here. It's at the Paramount Theater Austin. So they're not doing the festival I don't think, but they are doing a lot of great shows. Big J's there.
Starting point is 01:06:44 I'm there, Miss Pat's there, Miss sho woes there. It's going to be a fucking great week weekend, a week of shows in Austin, Texas, which I hear is the new fucking comedy mecca now. Now the Joe Rogan movie. That's the place to be. So check that out on my website, Robica live.com. You're going to do these stupid fucking names you know what I'm gonna go up these names um every week we announce we we we uh bring up the new patreon members uh shit we got ten dollar members thank them using my kids here he winds up punching me ten times but uh hey fully maybe you can help me out with this
Starting point is 01:07:20 yeah what's up the ten dollar members we wind up giving we do like a 10 guns salute or fucking make a noise 10 times maybe you can just improv something for this first guy how's that okay you're ready here we go Jamie Kakakhan me. You got to say it 10 times. I'll also disappear. Boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom. Very good. Is that what you mean? That's not 10, but yes. I mean, come on. Got him. I was bomb, but boom, but boom, but boom, but boom, that was five. You need five more. Boom, but boom, but boom, but boom, but boom, but boom, but boom, that's too many. That's too many. But yes, Bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump bump Oh No, they're only five dollar members, but go ahead bow brand brand in Baker Grant straight to the back crown
Starting point is 01:08:45 He's got different I mean you got something else in you Yeah I'm doing different things all different Sarah Banger hair Uh-huh Hi Gabby uh check out Gabby is Brian at fucking Instagram. Uh, one of the young talented stars. She's got a book something this year. And once, once we get back, she'll be, what is it? My Emmy. What? My new, my brand new Emmy. Where do you get Emmys? Where can you buy an Emmy? I want it. On what? How many times I talked to you on the phone?
Starting point is 01:09:30 You know what? Now it's our time for drama. I talked to you on the phone and I tell you things about my life. I go, oh, I want an Emmy. Buh, buh, buh, buh. And you go, every single time you act surprised. Congratulations.
Starting point is 01:09:41 Yeah, what's the point? Is it a real Emmy? It's like a midgen Emmy. It's a real Emmy. I want it for producing a documentary. Can I see it? It's great. Yeah, what's the point? Is it a real Emmy? It's like a midgen Emmy. It's a real Emmy. I want it for producing a documentary. Can I see it? It's great. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:51 She's an Emmy. She's fucking 20 something. She has an Emmy. She dresses like a homeless person. She has an Emmy. I'm wearing a full tied eye outfit. Did you notice that? Wow.
Starting point is 01:10:00 You're very nice. Is that a real Emmy? Or is that like, that's a Femi? Does it say a name on it? All right. Congratulations, Gabby. Yay. Thank you. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:10:11 Congrats. Mush, you won producer of the year for podcasting. I got you. I'm going to ship it out to you. And I got you a bag that comes with a bag of double a bag bag That's what you're getting most and that's much I can't Freezer they last longer buddy
Starting point is 01:10:41 I can't believe she want to fucking am Emmy that makes me so sick to my stomach. And I remember when I came to WVFan was trashing me on and scrimping like what the hell did you win an Emmy for? I'm like I also have a job. I know I forget that. She'll be gone someday. But even if you're on TV making millions of dollars you're still going to book the show. I probably will honestly.
Starting point is 01:11:02 You got them right you will. I've got to stay on the few roots. I still got to be trashed once a week. And you two are members. I hope you make it. I hope you make it at least into my belly button surgery. That's a good goal for you. That's a good time. Yeah, make it to my belly button surgery. December 10th. Check out, Check out their podcast. Are you garbage? It's on Patreon. Make sure you join them because right now they're rolling the dice on what they think is a fucking great podcast and I think the same thing and they're on Patreon and like you guys know we do two free episodes a week on YouTube and iTunes and all that kind of stuff.
Starting point is 01:11:46 I would just interrupt my fucking plug. It's not so nice anymore. Is he, Bobby? We just don't patreon. We go other things too. Here we go. Here we go. Mush, what else? What do I got? Mush? You have that show at the Paramount? Let's see.
Starting point is 01:12:08 No, no, we didn't only show this already. What? Yeah, we plugged your show. We plugged the Patreon. Make sure you like, comment, and subscribe. If you're watching this, tell your friends, and see us later in the week with Mike Galton. We'll see you guys next week on You Know What The, You're the Best Fans Up. Con Volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Espectacularismos, lincones de película y un sincín de aventuras te esperan. ¡Fliparás!
Starting point is 01:12:48 Huelades de Madrid, a Murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea. Tarifa sujetas a disponibilidad. Consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. you

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