Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Aries Spears | Troublemaker

Episode Date: May 10, 2021

This week Bobby welcomes Aries Spears to the podcast as they talk getting on Mad TV, what comedy won't allow today, and staying true to yourself in the entertainment industry! SUBSCRIBE TO YKWD https://www.patreon.com/robertkelly https://thelaughbutton.podlink.to/YKWD​ http://www.ykwdpodcast.com FOLLOW YKWD http://www.twitter.com/YKWDpodcast http://www.instagram.com/ykwdudepodcast http://www.facebook.com/YkwdPodcast FOLLOW ROBERT KELLY http://www.twitter.com/robertkelly http://www.instagram.com/robertkellylive http://www.facebook.com/robertkellylive New episodes arrive every Sunday via The Laugh Button For advertising opportunities email: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Before everybody was doing it here, I have Make sure you're watching this on YouTube, hit the subscribe button, don't be stingy with your subscribes and your likes. All right, you can leave a comment if you want, but hit the thumbs up button. I don't even care if you thought it was mediocre. Hit the thumbs up button and hit the subscribe button. But today's episode is not gonna be mediocre,

because I have a comic who I've watched from afar. I feel like we should have been friends 20 years ago. We've met before, but he didn't remember it. So I made an impact. But I'm very excited to have him on today. Today's episode of YKWT. Please welcome Aries Spears, everybody. What's up, buddy?

Yo, buddy, what's up, baby? You don't remember, because we talked on the phone, and I was like, you were like, we've met, I don't know, we, and I was like, yeah, we have. We've met, we actually had a conversation one night that was kind of meaningful to me. And, holy shit, I'm here to watch like meaningful to me. Holy shit, I'm here for like meaningful and me.

So I'm shocked. But go ahead. No, I'm kidding. Well, it was out front of the laugh factory in LA and you were going through some shit, right? Still am. Still am. Always.

Well, you go through some shit and I saw you and I know that look because I have that look too. I'm always, you know, in front of a club with my foot up on the wall trying to unclean my fists because someone just said something or something just happened or something's going on and you were on front and I walked up and I was I just walked out of the old man was up you good and you went no no and we started having conversation about some shit you going through something with your girl or something while you were getting something divorced I don't know what was fun was happening

right and We talked for a little bit and you You you said some shit that made sense and I was a guy about you know fucking women and I agree with everything by the way and and then that was it and then I didn't see it yet but I was just to watch you on YouTube and because I love you shit and then I started watching your interviews right and your interviews to me I was like oh this guy reminds me of a tree's because he's he's not holding back like you know comics when we usually get interviewed we wind up we we we love to be interviewed because we wind

up like it's a documentary about our lives and we usually pontificate you know but yo you you just say fuck it and you you call people out and say shit you're not supposed to say. And of course there be Bobby believe it. But as I keep telling Quidd I go Hollywood Bobby's gotta if I was Hollywood Bobby 15 years ago I'd be in a mansion right now. Right. If I could have learned how to just go like this. Hey so good to see you. Good to see you man.

Yeah. If I could have done that 15 years ago I would be I wouldn't be a three bedroom ranch how to just go like this. Hey, so good to see you. Good to see you, man. Like I've done that 15 years ago, I would be I wouldn't be a three bedroom ranch with no attic and no basement. Right. Well, you know, listen, man, not much has changed. And we're going to go in through shit, whether it's still with my girl or some other girl, whether it's still with my girl or some other girl, whether it's this business or just trying to navigate through this bullshit minefield of Hollywood hypocrisy, because shit is so high school driven

and high school oriented that, I don't know that I'm cut out for this man. You know, I don't ever doubt that I've been cut out for the show part of it, for the entertainment part of it, the creativity part of it, but that's very different from playing the game. And I think I'm one of the excuse my vanity. I think I'm one of the best when it comes to the creativity part of it, but I suck at playing this game. Right.

It's, it's, but some people are very good at it. Some of my masters. It's a different skill set. Yeah. Right? Like people say, you can get that, you, I can act. Give me the part in the movie.

Give me the part that you, I can do it. I'll pull it all, I can do it well. But the auditioning is a whole different thing. That's a different skill set. Yeah. Right? Yes. You know what I mean?

Yeah. Listen, I've, I've, I'm going on countless conditions where I Know it for my bones one time on the set and as a comic and as a and as a playful person It's like being a kid in the candy store or a toy store Give me the GI Joe give me the Lionel. Give me the man. I already got the fucking adventures mapped out in my head. I know what I'm gonna improvise. I know it's gonna be funny. I know what I need to say.

But that process beforehand, looking at you, looking at me, what you gotta look on your face when it seems like you worried about what you've got to order for lunch and less about what my performance is. And that look of judgment. I suck at that, man. I get 20 points.

How'd you get it? How'd you get mad TV though, back in the day? Like, first of all, where are you from originally? New York, man, Ed. What's side of man, Ed? West Side. What street? West 34, if ninth and tenth half. No shit.

Yeah. That's how, look at how it's kitchen, right? Yeah, that's why I grew up. All right, right. I live there, I tried to, I'm trying to fucking relate. I'm like, yeah, how's kitchen, right? I live there in a, I live there in a high rise, Doorman building for like seven years. Yeah, man, I'm not cheap.

My gosh, my God, my door man, Teddy used to fall asleep and I was dangerous. Something happened. Something happened. I was building. You're about some of my door man. You stings, falls themselves to the children. I'm joking. I still do that.

I'm kidding. I'm kidding before I get fucking banned from everything. But you went to LA and then where did you go? How did you get a mad TV? How did you get that gig? Well, you know, it's crazy because back then Hollywood would give away what was called holding deals. So like if you came out to LA and you became

a hot commodity, they would lock you up with a holding deal and basically take you off the market. So no one else could get to you and give them kind of gave themselves a year to develop. I never got one of those by the way. I've never been held. No,'s ever said, hey, let's get that guy and hold him for a year. Give him some money. I got held for five years. I remember my first car in LA. My manager back then was Norm Nixon, Stormin Norman.

He won a couple championships with Magic in Korean, his wife is Debbie Allen to produce a Korean confer. Storm Nixon, Stormin Norman. He won a couple championships with Magic in Karim, his wife is Debbie Allen to produce her choreographer. And, you know, so through Norm's connections, I remember I went to the set of Fresh Prince of Belaya and DL Uly was doing warm up. So I had worked with DL already, I had already done depth jam and DL basically said,

hey man, this hot young kid is in town. I work with him. Air is come through five minutes. So I'm doing five minutes and I mean everybody from Will Smith to the entire cast is all stopping, watching me do what I do. And it had so happened that the president of the network at the time, Warren Littlefield was there.

So the work got out quick. This hot young kid is in town. We got to get him a hold and deal. So I was held by NBC for a year, nothing happened. ABC for a year, nothing happened. CBS for a year, nothing happened. And then by the time I got to Fox, I had an audition for Man TV in year one. one and they wanted me but I couldn't

do it because I was locked into a holding deal at Fox with Aaron Spelling. And Aaron Spelling, we did this pilot called, fuck was it? But it was basically like a mod squad. And then that didn't go anywhere. But then when my time was about to be up for Fox, the head of the network, Peter Churren at that time said, look man, I'm sorry we couldn't get anything going for you, but you're such a great talent. I don't want to let you go. Why don't we just stick you on Man TV?

You are just for it. They wanted you the first time. So fucking just go on that show. So he put me on Man TV and that's how I got that. So yeah, I mean, listen, we're talking about, yeah, I've never, that sounds magical to me. I've never had that situation in my life. That sounds like, you know, you can do it.

You can do it. Now, they did a holding deal. They did holding deals and they, what was the other one? They had a, what was the other one? They had, there was one more. There was a holding deal and then... If it felt like if you were a strong stand-up comedian,

you automatically got a deal for your own show. Yeah, not me. For listening. Well, hard either. I remember I went to LA and everybody in them mother had a holly. There was a dude who was a garbage man, like eight months before he moved to LA,

he had a holding deal. I just, I have to have one. I want to remember that there was a dude named chicken. Remember chicken? Was it a black guy? No, it was a white guy. No, no. No, no, it wasn't a black guy.

It was a white guy. No, it was a white dude. And he went to Montreal and he fucking improv to set, took his pants down, murdered. And he got a $500, $500,000 development deal. Like, on the spot, like people fought, because networks would fight over people. Once they saw that person,

they would fight over them to keep them, to hold them, mainly so no one else would do shit with them. So it was like, like Bob Marley got, like he was on the show, he was talking about, he got like seven holding deals, and they just didn't do shit with him. So it was like, like Bob Marley got, like he was on the show, he was talking about, he got like seven holding wheels and they just didn't do shit with him. He just out in LA, wasting the fuck away.

And then that's it, you know, he just got that money. And that's it. But at least, Bob, I got on that TV. Yeah, I mean, look, I probably made, I moved out to LA when I was 17. So I probably made close to a million dollars, a million and a half dollars by the time I was 21.

But I had nothing to show for it. You know, and it's like, listen, the money is nice. But after taxes and commission, it's still nice. But you need something to show for it. Because, you know, work it's like, listen, the money is nice, but after taxes and commission, it's still nice, but you need something to show for it, because you know, work gets work. So if you ain't got nothing to show for it, then you become the kid that was held around, that was hot, that no one could develop anything for.

It's like a kid star, they're cute and shit, and then when you see him at 13, they look like shit. They look weird. Like the eyes are too far apart Fucking eyebrows. It do thick the teeth are fucked up. You're like who's that? Oh, that's that dude that in that movie with Bruce Willis What yeah, yeah, yeah So what you got but you got the thing I was watching because if you if people don't realize how fucked up

Mad TV was, like Mad TV did, I mean, it could never air now. That show would never make it, never make it now. I mean, one of my favorite clips was you were in, was it racist family feud? Yes. Do you remember that? Yeah, the McGoose, what was it racist family feud? Yes. Do you remember that? The, uh, yeah, the, the, the, the, what was it? The, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the should you got it? Okay, right here. I got it right here, check this out.

This is one of the funniest clips ever. And it's a great pleasure. Introducing the best. We're ready for action. The Macrackers. It's the Magher family. The most wonderful. Let's play the family view.

Views for our family view, put on the wing. Yeah, this is a whole new one. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Dear Lord, if you have any mercy in your heart, please just kill me like no. Oh, God! Stop being dumb! Oh, I guess you're busy.

We have you! Hey! Let's fall! All right. How you doing, Robert Miker? Good luck to you. There are in craggers. Thanks a lot.

All right. It's the Mickers. All right. Let's go. Here we go. All right. How you doing, Robert Micker? Good luck to you. They're in crackers. Thanks a lot. All right. It's the MIGGAR, it's the crackers. What is it?

It's a cheat. It's a cheat. Listen, it's a...it's Micker. Not MIGGAR, bro. Hey, cut me a break, bro. I haven't seen my penis in eight years, are I? No. Hey, few top branches on the board.

There you guys do the thing everyone seen or they stupid crap. Here we go. Hey, you African American. I love this right here. Oh, wait, not this. Which one? They got great chicken recipe. Show me. Yeah, when he goes made something horrible, white people don't with black people.

Yeah, that's it, right? We have the free free spot. There's a chance for the crap is to steal from the midter's, no James. Red Jesus. Well, Jesus. And anyone here, but I think there's a magazine called Chocolate. This is good answer.

So, you see, I was trying to go to that clip where he has about the, being called chocolate. I was trying to go to that clip where he has the, the, you know, I think about what people, I think it's next. I think it's the next thing up. I said next one, next one, next thing up. The next thing up, I think. Get the mirror to the point, there we go. You can get it with any of this on TV right now. Not at all, Not at all.

I talked to Bunny over there. I didn't call him. I talked to Bunny. To call me a chocolate bunny, we'll tell him I'm taking 400 out of gate. He's a stick-up, you're lily-white-cast, my ass. What are you taking? You know, can we play the game? I love her.

Yeah, most great. Eat, Lily! Yeah, most great. It really is. It's little sad, though. It's one of the funniest people walking, right? Poor guy, not to be a stand-up comedian, yeah. Yeah, you're sharing how you're doing. How'd you become a member? Oh, I'm Mary.

I'm Mary. I'm Mary. Look, Mark sweetheart, I love you. Between getting your face slammed. I actually Too easy. Oh, okay. Who is this? She was great too. She's a bookwee. Yeah, Debra was a beast. I love the way that rolls off my tongue. Okay.

To bookwee top four answers on the board, name something terrible, the white people, have done the- I love this. Oh, they're cheesy. Slavery. Slavery. Slavery.

It's face it. Some of us miss it. Show me. Jesus Christ. It's number four. It's number four. It's number four. It's number four. It's number four. It's number four.

It's number four. It's number four. Jesus Christ. Yeah. I'm saying. I'm saying. I'm saying. It's number four.

It's number four. It's number four. It's number four. It's number four. It's number four. It's number four. It's number four. It's number four. It's number four. It's number four. Let me put that. Let me think some, that show was fucking funny. Mad TV in the first, whatever, years, you, Sasso, that chick, I forget, I forget that name.

I don't know why. I can't even read him, Mo Collins, Deborah Wilson, Alex Boenstein, Mike McDonald, Nicole Sullivan, yeah. You couldn't fuck with that show. I mean, I think it was funny that it was funny that SNL 100 times over. And it was funnier than living color. I mean, I think it was funny. You know, I'm going to take some look. I'm going to be the first and last person always say,

the Chappelle show took sketch comedy to another stratosphere. And I'm seeing we were better than Chappelle show, because I don't think we were, but we're in the conversation in terms of what we did, the fact that we did it before the Chappelle show, we're in the conversation in terms of what we did the fact that we did it before the shipell show. Where in the conversation? Fuck yeah, dude, listen, the thing with the shipell show, it was great. It was well produced, but it wasn't, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, particular, uh, she pal show, but this was this had this SNL feel that had the studio,

you know, with a live audience type of feel, uh, with it. It had that laugh track. So these skits, they were skits. You know, and so in that genre, which is living color SNL and, you know, Dave's show was only, only I mean they showed that shit on the TV They weren't doing it. You know, I think it was a different a different thing I think Matt TV was probably the funniest out of all there. I mean just silly stupid stupid That bit that what's the big talk guy with the with the baby character? What was his name? He did the Let me tell you something what the fuck

That if it kills me and the Asian Asian character. What's her name? Oh Miss miss miss want you looking like a man Miss Dude, yeah, some of the funniest characters ever were on that show. You know, I, I, I, you know, it's, it's, it was always to me. So like a blessing in a curse, because the blessing being that we were a great show, we were better than SNL. At what point we were killing them in the ratings. But the truth is SNL was the bully on the block. You know, SNL was the NBA and we were killing them in the ratings. But the truth is, SNL was the bully on the block.

SNL was the NBA, and we were the CBA. It didn't matter how good we were to try to compete with someone as powerful of an entity. As SNL was just, you couldn't beat it. Because there would be people that would come up to me and go, man, SNL sucks. I hate that show. I watch it every week and it sucks to watch it every week.

You hit the top. It's like Star Trek. You know, it's part of the pop culture. I like SNL. I like the weekend update. I like, I still like shit on it. You know what I mean? I don't get to watch it because I'm working.

I'm a fucking, I'm a club comic. I'm always, if I'm, you know, I'm usually on the road doing some, but I don't mind it, but I hear you. It's, you know, it's like, but there's something about mad TV and even in living color, but I think mad TV even more.

I don't know maybe because you weren't being watched maybe because it wasn't a network it was you know it was on Fox where you guys got away with more shit I mean think about think about doing that skit today if that skit was on a skit show right now on network tv the world would explode the world you know you know, people would die. People would fuck houses would be fucking burnt down. People would die over that sketch. Robbie, let me tell you, so many people hit me up on social media.

And so they ever look at a do a Manitv reboot, a reunion. And I tell them, yeah, they did and it came and went. I mean, it was on CW, it came on Wednesdays at nine. Yes, and this climate, this moisture, political correctness, woke climate. And I mean, it was a blip. No one saw it. People were shocked when I go, yeah, they did it.

They came and went, man. And when I, and they had a lot of the old cast members, Will, me, Jebra, we all came into cameos and we reprised some of our own characters. And I'm gonna tell you something. The day I went there to shoot my episode, I'm in the makeup chair and I'm surrounded by the new cast

and you could smell it. You could smell the failure. I was like, they've had no shot, yo. They had you, they're energy was not the same. You could feel the nervousness, the sense of they had limits. You knew they couldn't go as far. They had a shield. They were just way to probably be nice to each other

with a courteous and having fun conversations. Yeah, man, yeah. Like, do we, when we did NAT TV, we'd be in the dressing room, we'd be in the makeup chair, my look was making rape jokes, cocaine jokes. I mean, we just, it was like a dirty bar. And we just, we knew what we could get away with.

And I just went, these poor guys got no shot man Well, it's as soon as you as soon as you draw lines in the sense like when you do a set on like a late night As soon as they tell you hey, can you change that word and drop that and not say this right? You're fucked. You're a fuck. You're funny. Yeah. You're funny is gone. I mean, yes, you can find a way around it. Yes, you'll be able to pull it off, but you're not going to feel it. You're not going to feel that set as opposed to when you go on in a club and just go up and do your shit. And you can't do that anymore with sketches.

You can't just write shit. You have to you have to have a You know a narrative at in mind Boy, you're gonna get trash like Michael Cheg gets fuck with all the time Michael Cheg a fuck it because Michael Cheg you know Michael Cheg. Oh fuck you say it. What's fuck? Yeah, I got for the first time I didn't register first, but I'm like the backdoor from SNL Yeah, you me a Michael J. Yeah, yeah Michael J. Yeah You know you don't like Michael it's other Bobby Oh

I'm not struggle. What who is that? I'm not a struggle. What, who is that? I apologize. I feel very proud. Good. Michael J. I know it was my favorite. Michael J.

He's, he got shit because he was given the cast members that don't want to make thought, they don't want to work with Elon Musk. They're putting up a stink because they don't like whatever he stands for. So these people are like trying to protest him being on the show. And I guess Michael J posted some shit where he made fun of him or something and he got shif for that.

It's like we're fucking. I remember I was watching some documentary about dice. It might even have been the comedy store documentary. And they were talking about how when he went to go do SNL, one of the female comics refused to work for him, worked with him because of his material. And I said, and they should escort this bitch to the state line and never allow her back in.

You cannot call yourself a comment and refuse to work with another comment because you don't like his material. Your fucking comedian badge should be taken. Comedy is subjective. Even if anything that isn't a truck up a D, your job as a basketball player is to suit the fuck up and play with another basketball player.

Fuck that. That's lame. Yeah, you're right, it is. It is subjective, because what you think isn't funny, a lot of people do, you know what I mean? It's like after the show with... Guys, what was that? Now guys, you're fucking... It's your LA internet's fucking up. What are you on? You're on 4G or 5G? You know 4G?

I'm not even still with the G's all brother. How many bars you are on right now? How many bars you're doing this show? God damn it man hook up to the Wi-Fi Are you on are you in a hotel? You hooked up to the Wi-Fi No, I'm in home Do to the Wi-Fi? No, I'm in full. Do you have Wi-Fi? Yeah.

Are you hooked up to the Wi-Fi? Yes, yes. Oh, you're good? All right, all right, all right. Yeah, I'm in full. I'm in full. All right, all right. You're stuttering.

I'm very excited about this fucking be havin' you on the show, so I don't want it to fuck up. I don't want it to be like a CB radio. No, over, you go. All right, go ahead. I got you, I'm gonna clear now, are we clear? We're clear, Roger, go ahead. We're good.

All right, that's good. Now I forgot what the point I was trying to make. I know, I wanna tell you right where you were. You were saying that if you're a comic, do your fucking job. When I was supposed to be sitting here, this comic's I don't like, this comedy I don't like. But you know, people like,

what do you think of that person? What do you think? That's what comedy is, what the fuck do you think? You know, I'm just worried about what people think of my comedy. The what, what I go out there, this is what comedy is. What the fuck do you think? You know, I'm just worried about what people think of my comedy. What I go out there, this is what I do. Hopefully you can gather enough fucking assholes that like your shitty weird sense of humor, that you can make a living, live your life, pay your bills, and have a good time, right?

But other than that, it's like, I don't even fuck what you do. The people that are trying to dictate a certain style of comedy that that's what it is, it's like, oh fuck yourself. You know, and you can see it too, man. And when we came up, you had to just be funny. Like you couldn't watch TV. You couldn't watch hours of internet YouTube shit and mimic what fucking people are doing. There was no internet.

There was no, you had to go to clubs, get on stage and fucking work your shit out. That was it. You know, and usually it wasn't that as many, there wasn't like 19 news sitting around. It was just you, like when I came up with burp, trees, trees Dolman Bob Marley, you know, and then the older guys So you you were just bringing what you were off stage on stage and developing that Everybody had their own little silhouette now. I feel like there's I don't know man There's a way to be on stage to to get shit, you know what I mean? Yeah, listen, I'm not a big fan of Karen Tom's comedy,

but I respect them, you know, and show me. Right, it's like when you look at a major, when you're like, When you're like, Yeah, fucking the great ass. It's like, he's got great ass. It's the fucking guys in shape. For a red head, I mean, dude, for a red head,

he's pretty, he's got it together. It's enviates. But it's like, he's got it together. It's envious. But it's like when you look at a major title fight for HBO and you see you look into the crowd and sit ringside, you go holy shit, they're shame mostly, this day LaHoya is Lennox Lewis. Fighters watch fighters. So comics watch comics, we respect comics,

might not be my cup of tea, but the dude who's doing what his job is, which is what you said. Number one job be funny. Just be fucking funny. That's why it always kills me when I go on the road and I see these local comedians doing comedy classes, taking lessons from the fucking owners and the managers. I'm like they don't know the first fucking thing about funny and the number one rule, the only rule is be funny. What do you mean? You mean to tell me, you're gonna tell a lady,

or a guy, you know, when you wear a suit and you're dressed a certain way, it improves the comedy and our money suit makes you funnier. Get the fuck out of here. What a waste of money to share. It would actually make me less funnier. If I was in a suit it makes everybody uncomfortable. It would take away my funny if I were a suit. It just makes me look hot and uncomfortable and the crowd hates it. I wore a suit. Me and Kevin Hart were doing the galas.

Remember the galas that you know, the galas that just for laughs? Yes. You go up and you do the big room, right? It's the big thing. My first galah, my agent tells me to get a suit. I'm like, what? You go, you should wear a suit.

So I'm like, okay, I got a suit at the mall right there. I went in, got a fit, took all my money I made for the week, for that Montreal bought a suit. And in my years, one of my fats, I was fat. And I go in and then like, you can't swear, you can't say fuck, you can't, you know, I'm working this set, Chris DuClean, Kevin Hart goes on before me one night, fuck this and fuck that and shit and piss. my little kid shit in my hand, and through shit in my fucking face, that little motherfucker shit. And I was like, what the fuck is that? Why can he swear? That's cute when he does it.

I'm like, he's white, he's fucking cute. I go out there, He goes out fucking murders. I go out after him. I don't know how that happened in a suit and I died a horrible death, horrible death. And I hadn't aware, because I gave, I left my funny back. I left my thing back in my dressing room.

I left all my instincts all my comic instincts And I gave a fuck and I tried to do this thing and I remember when I came off stage I knew I bought because my agent went you look good Listen It's nice when you get to a place It both in your age and your comedy comfort level, where you just stop listening to people, where you just stop giving a fuck and you do what your instincts tell you to do.

Right. Because I stop listening to people a long fucking time ago about what I shouldn't do on stage. It's the most ludicrous concept ever. Yeah. That's true. It is true. It is true.

It's hard not to, though, because you know, you do, and this is why I respect you, because you do wanna make it. You do wanna, you know, you do wanna have, you know, there is a level where people are at, and you're like, fuck man, they're making a lot of money. They're selling the shows out. They don't have, they don't have a club calling them up.

Hey, can you push it a little more? Hey, can you send out another tweet? You know, they just seem, you know, they're just putting shit up sold out, sold out, show added, sold out, which fucking bugs me to no end, by the way. If you show sold out, why you're tell me why you're trying to promote it promote the one that is it Fuck it, right, I'm like I'd get it. You know, you know, I know when you have a soul

I'll show you want everybody to know but it's You know what fuck it fuck it because I don'ts You know what are you gonna do man you just get dance will brought you right you just gotta you gotta do your thing right you know but maybe if you play the game maybe if you play the game a little better I don't know is that it maybe if we were like high and how are you and thank you and I think you're great what I'm with you? Why the fuck aren't you the motherfucker? Like why aren't you, I mean maybe you are now

because I've noticed in the last couple of years, you've popped off a little bit. You kinda, you're into that presence and your interviews got people into you and you kinda, you developed a fan base for actually speaking the way you feel. Am I wrong? No, but I would say this, you know, I'm like most guys, I'm a sports fanatic. So I use a lot of sports analogies and liking a lot of what we do to sports. And in terms of boxing I always say this to people there's the people's champ and there's the

Paper champ and I say the paper champ is the guy on paper by Hollywood standards. He's the guy The people's champ may not be the guy on paper, but the streets fucking love you. They respect you They'll have your back any day of the week Some guys are one of the other and some guys are both Kevin Hart's both. On paper, he's the guy. The street's level just as much. Yep. I'm not the paper chair. Hollywood don't like me much. The people fucking love me because why? They like you. Well, because when you look at my interviews, I'm very outspoken. I'm black and when you're black

and you don't stay in a box and you do this shit, Hollywood is wary of you. You know, you don't seem like you'll play along. You don't seem like you'll do the jazz hands. You don't seem like you'll dance the jazz hands. You don't seem like you'll dance the steps that we want you to dance. We want you to be happy, nigga, smile. If you ain't smiling, you're angry if you're black.

You know, if you two vocal about social issues and race, you're a troublemaker, you know, and I'm very, I'm very outspoken about those things because those things moved me. Muhammad Ali was always my favorite fighter. Now, my Tyson was my era. I'm an 80s baby, he was my era. But in terms of what Ali represented.

Right. The social activism, the bravery, the integrity, standing his ground, believing what he believed in, sacrificing his career, a payday, that moves me, man. That brings me to tears, man. And I want, my manager used to say, you wanna be rich, you wanna be right. Because very seldom can you be rich and be right.

And very seldom can you be rich and be right and very seldom can you be, you know, vice versa. Well, I'm going, it's got to be a way to be both. And maybe that's my, that's my, that's my, that was a patricio to say, patricio to say that all the time. Do that's, he used to say, like, why can't I do this as me? Like, why do I have to, why do I have to give them, why do I have to give them some? Why can't, like, I'm the one that they're coming to see. I'm the one with the talent. I'm the one who's got the shit that they want.

Why do I have to bow over? Why do they need me to, you know, why do they need me to get down on a knee? And, you know, like not be me. Why can't I just be this? But what was so interesting though, is, and I remember Patrice saying that, but what was so interesting was it felt like prior to his death, and he didn't know he was gonna die,

but prior to his death, he kind of changed some of his tune because I remember he was on opian Anthony and he said something about anybody that has an ounce of integrity, trying to make it in his business, anybody that's trying to be the long gunman, I'm gonna do it my way. You're a fucking idiot

because it just doesn't work. You're never going to make it that way. You have to do a little soft shoe. You have to bend to that knee. You gotta kiss a little ass. You just have to do it. And maybe I like him and some stubborn that who knows, maybe I'll pay the same price.

But I gotta believe that wherever he dropped the baton, if I can pick it up and take it from there, and even if I don't go all the way, wherever I drop the baton, if somebody picks it up and takes it from there, somebody's gotta make that happen. Because I hate the fact that I gotta do all of this shit, to be where I wanna be. I can be who I am and be funny.

It's crazy, Bobby. Like, I'm going to road and I'm not a morning guy. I'm not a very talkative guy, very quiet to myself unless I know you. I can tell. So they'll come pick me up to do radio in the morning and then the whole ride over him in the car and the girl and the guy who's ever driving the radio,

the manager, they're going, you want some coffee? Do you need some coffee? Are you gonna be okay? You know you gotta do the radio and I go, my fucker, I've been doing this 30 years. I know when it's time to go, how to go. I don't have to write four in the car on the way to the radio station. I'm tired, motherfucker.

It's 6am. I got in at 3am. I ate my wings and my burger. I didn't go to bed until 5. I'm full, I'm tired. But when I get to the station and they go, go, motherfucker, I light up like a Christmas tree and then when we're done I've shut it right back off. I know what I'm doing

Right, yeah, no I hear you I hear it's it's it's It's fucked up man like I was watching one of your videos on Instagram and you you then it was the you I think it got deleted because I can't find it. You were talking about the chick that just got shot with the stab in the other chick. I deleted. And well, why did you delete it? Because I wasn't in the mood to be Captain America and take on Thanos' army by myself. Well when I saw it, because you were like, you were first of all you were lying down, which was just uncomfortable for everybody to watch knowing that your fucking cock was

probably out under the covers. And you just got done fucking wankin' one. And now you're given a brilliant speech about life. And I'm triumphant with you, but I'm like, I know as fucking is huge rank, as fucking down there somewhere. Anything, any huge, I'm not the stereotype. That's the ball in big dicks.

Yeah, I'm a disappointment. I didn't mind, I wasn't doing that as a stereotype as it was just as a friend to have let you have a big dick in the story. That's the only one. I wish, I don't have that as a stereotype as it was just as a friend to have let you have a big dick in the story I wish I wish I don't have a jump You were you would you were like you were screaming at everybody you got it wrong They that was right. She she that was gonna, she was gonna kill that girl's somebody's daughter. And they, the cop had no choice. He did the right thing. This was, oh, this was an okay one.

You guys got to settle the fuck down. Everybody's got to chill the fuck out on this one. And he was the only person as far as comedians go that was saying like like common sense like I watched the whole thing and I'm like wait a minute what the fuck's going on? You got fucking LeBron, you got this, everything's like just reacting to that and it seems like you watched it and made a an intelligent observation of not enough. And you were screaming at people and you did it and you're right, it's like they're gonna attack you now because you said your opinion on a topic that didn't fit what we're supposed to say.

You know, one of the worst things, the most insulting things you could call a black man is a cune or a samba. And it was coming. I was getting called Sambo. I was getting called coon by my own people. I had slave thinking. And it was one of those like you said, listen, I'm and I just for the saying, look at my interviews, I have power to the people. I'm all about to revolution. So the last thing I'm ever gonna be is a corner of San Bob,

but I was saying to my people, the black community, I understand your frustration. I'm frustrated too. I understand your anger, but it's misplaced here. Get out of your emotions and think what logic when this one really logically break down what happened. This ain't it y'all, This ain't it, y'all. This ain't it.

And so, like I said, I was getting bombarded with all kinds of insults. And I just went, man, fuck this. And I deleted it. You took it down? Yeah. Oh, because the next video I saw is that Instagram sent you a letter saying that you're gonna get a title. Oh, I'm bleeding.

Yeah, I've gotten so many Instagram warnings that they finally sent me the one that said, if you post one more thing that we deem unacceptable, you're accounting permanently deleted. So now, I'm just like, you know what, man, I'm a ledDL, you'll lead you all a controversy shit. I'm a stay away from anything political, red, excuse me, racial or sexual in nature, because I'm also trying to use Instagram

as a tool to make money. And like Warren Buffett said, if you can't control your emotions, you can't control your money. So if I get suspended, then I'm fucked. So, but, what, let me ask you question, no, what was it that you said? You don't have to say what it was,

but what was it like? No, no, it's been a number of things. I would send out posts with Instagram girls who are twerking, showing titties and ass, and then I would pose these sexual scenarios like I would go, sellers for a million dollars, would you rather,

and then I guess people would report it, I think women would report it. But, rather what? Ask me, ask me, I wanna give you my opinion, ask me. I would, I would say, there was one other girl who beautiful, I.G of a girl who beautiful,

IG model, fat ass, stick thighs, and she was cocked over like she was taking a piss on the ground. She wasn't, but she was in that position. And I said something about sellers, you get home and see this girl taking a piss on your front lawn. What do you do? And you slide on some? Exactly. Most dudes were like,

yo, you can give me the golden shower. And then something dudes were like, man, I checked that bitch off the lawn. Whatever it was. Just playful, guide, juvenile shit. It depends on how big her vagina is. Because sometimes when, you know, when a girl pees, it comes out in a little stream. But sometimes when they pee, it's like this fucking, it looks like a fire hose. When you first turn it on, it's just like this big. That's what I'm doing.

That's the way I'm doing that. I don't want like a sprinkler. I like a hose, like a nice, straight. Like I would pose questions to women like, ladies for a billion dollars. Could you go two years straight with no makeup, no give your hair done, no shower and no brush or GIT or would you suck a dead dude's dick out the casket in front of the church? So just silly shit like that.

Yeah, I know. You know, I'm a different did. Yeah, well, I mean, these are all different points. I was like, yeah. A second dead dude's dick, if I do, I would do that. Is that a thing? Do you have a billion dollars? I'll fix it. You got it, mine. I'll do that in front of my wife.

Oh, my God. I'll do that in front of my wife who hasn't taken a shower or used makeup in a year. We'll do both scenarios. I'll do that for five million, actually. in front of my wife who hasn't taken a shower or used makeup in a year. We'll do both scenarios. I'll do that for five million actually, not even a book. Right. Hey, what though, man, you got to be one thing I'm learning about getting older with women is that I should have learned this years ago when I dated this hot,

smoke and hot Puerto Rican girl. I mean, just two and 11. And I showed up at her house and she had white all on her upper lip. And I was like, what the fuck is that? She goes, I'm bleaching my mustache. And I went, what? And she goes, I have a little thing.

So I bleached it. And I'm like, you have a fucking mustache. It fucked me up. And I didn't realize women alike nature. You ever see like one of a mused apart closes and you go back a year later and just grasses up and the fucking Ferris wheel has vines up it and it's rusted and you can't even read the sign anymore.

Is that gonna year? Just nature to back that whole, women are very similar to that. If you don't let a girl get to a bathroom and hit a shower and a razor, she's got me look like a cave woman very shortly. Well, you know, I realized it again, this is what's great about when you get older, you stop dimming the fuck and you would hear more into what you like without shame. I like but here more into what you like without shame. I like a hairy 70s pussy and with a little bit,

not a stink, but a, but a, there's a, there's a pungentness to it, like a cheese that's been sitting in room temperature. I like that, man. That turns me on. Dude, let me say something. I want nothing to do with that. I listen to me. I like, I want listen. I want, I want nothing. I want to, I want to smell nothing like I walked into a doctor's office. Just nothing. Oh, but I want nothing and I want the hair.

I want the hair to I want hair, but I want it to be nice. And even if you could comb it like to it from the side to the middle, I like that. And maybe then down at the end, I, I'm telling you a big hairy. Oh, I hate it. Oh, oh, Bobby, I used to say I used to say one of my bits. I want to go down on a woman with so much hair When I put my face down there. I look like a terrorist

Yeah, that's that's that's I Like I can't I like a punch in bad clips. You do the one where you can do this. Yeah. Oh Jim norin Like the same thing Jim norin likes it to look like a hamburger when she has underwear on. I love it. Oh, he's got the right idea. Like, being like, yeah. I don't, I like it.

I want it to be all inside of itself. I don't want anything flippin' out. I don't want no, I don't want the, I don't want the clip lookin' like China from wrestling, I don't want the clip looking like China from wrestling. I want it to be a very small thing that I have to look for and then I find it. Oh, shame on you. I don't want you.

I can't do this. Man. Dude, I like cheese, but I don't like a stinky cheese. I like a hover ride. No, no, no, no, no, no, it's not stinky. It's just a pungent. There's a difference between stinking and pungent. Pungent is a cheese that's been left out all day in room temperature during July.

Yeah, but you're not supposed to leave, but you're not supposed to leave cheese out, dude. You're not supposed to leave cheese out in July during the day. It's very scientific. It's all the calculations have to be precise. It's done correctly. Mixed with wine, it's the best thing ever. Oh, woof, woof. I don't know, dude. I don't know.

You're more of a man than me. I like it. I like it to be nice and nothing. I like it. I trimmed up. I don't like, you're more of a man than me. I like it, I like it to be nice and nothing. I like it to be trimmed up. I don't like anything shaved down there. And look, I know going down on me is a nightmare too. I know there's probably girls going,

yeah, that's what I hate about when you talk about, especially now when you talk about like sex, it's always, who the fuck wants to fuck you? And what about fucking, we know, shut up, shut up. All the people What about fucking you? We know. Shut up. Shut up. All you people say, all right. We know. Yeah, but you know what, listen,

when you got some swagger about you, Lord knows a little bit of money and fame don't hurt. They want to fuck you. They say that to regular motherfuckers. I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't. You should be on the cheese show. There's a cheese show. A friend of mine has a cheese show

and his girlfriend will do a different cheese every week. You should be on it. We sit out a click and pussy lips tasting like a wine and cheese tasting. Just, it is on the plate. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's. Has anybody, there's gotta be a video somewhere where somebody did some type of reference to what vagina smell like opposed to a cheese? You gotta, like a hot wing shell.

Well, you have to, I gotta, we'll do like hot wings. We have a bunch of buzzing and it goes from no smell to the worst smell. Like, like, that's a grab that was gone Fuck it Amazon like hasn't seen water Busy and like you have to crack it and the seal breaks like an ostrich egg and then you hit Oh my god Hey listen, I'm sure if there's not one so like that, there's one needs to be made.

That's a funny skill. Yeah, you just get a famous actor, just the third fluff of a giant. So you have this movie, yeah, I play this. Yeah. Or it's a squid. Yeah, go ahead. Yeah. But here's the thing, too.

This is the part about you that is funny because you're a standup. You're a funny fucking guy. You're a outspoken guy. You have a podcast with some Jewish doing some white dude. I don't even, I don't fucking understand that. I'm like, what is this coming? Because you're a nerd.

You're a big nerd. Um, toward the Greek. Um, and you know, it's his name is Andy Steinberg. He's actually my opener. He teaches with me on the road. So we've been on it doing it. You're your crowd. Andy Steinberg goes up in front of you a crowd. And who with that? Listen, a lot of my crowd is mixed, man. A lot of my death dates to man TV. I do a lot of mixed crowds or print words sometimes predominantly white crowds. Every now and then, I do a handful of black rooms.

And they like Andy. He goes down well. He does. He never took a hot one. He never took a hot one. Oh, he's he never took a hot yeah, he never took a hot one Listen if we go to Chuckles and Memphis With him niggas don't read man and slave we still going on

Yeah, that's you he's a tough pill to swallow You know, but it's a more metropolitan cities when the audience is predominantly black They they until it didn't enough to get him right Chuckles and messes I want more than that. I hate the South man I'm not a fan of South at all brother because like I said the niggas don't read man And and and I'm not the smart I don't claim to be the smartest Comic but I'm a little high-brow at times, and I know I say things and I use words

that them go with them up, fuck his head, man. Dude, I think Chuckles just opened a new club in Mississippi, and it's my first time in Mississippi last year, and I'm not even making this up, I do this in my standup. I ordered a pizza from Domino's and the girl goes, sir, what's Screet? Are you on?

Dispid said Screet, SKR EET. And I said, I gotta get the fuck about a Mississippi so I'm going to go to some slave catches. Like, it's just different. What's a slave catcher? You are seriously asking me that? Is that like the child catcher in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in You kidding me? No, I'm not. I'm serious. I don't even know. Will he walk the chocolate, will he walk around the chocolate factory? Oh, I thought I was a kid. I don't remember that.

Oh my God, dude. And I was careful. Yeah, but you're not waiting about that. I noticed that, I was joking. I was trying to make the joke about the, whatever. Sorry about that. I'll go to brother. Yeah, so it's just a different way of life down there.

And I'm a city boy, man, I'm a New Yorker. I'm East Coast. So I'm used to a certain speed and swagger, man. Right. Yeah, I hear you. I get on the South, I don't mind it, but it gets, here's what happens during the day. It's the sweetest people in the world.

So kind, like, hey, welcome, how you doing? Oh, come on in, all right. And have a nice day. And at night day it's the sweetest people in the world so kind like hey welcome how you doing oh come on in all right and have a nice day and at night it's like we fucking ball the fucker and it just turns into this it's like you put a little alcohol in them and they want a fucking stab you know you know everywhere else in the country, West Coast, East Coast, I get offered pussy. The sound is the only place where I get offered plates. Plates. Plates. Sweetie, you want some yams? I can bring you a plate. Fool. I wish I had that. I wish I had that. I told you the first black girl every day,

it was the fucking sexiest thing I've ever had in my life. She walked out, I wouldn't pick her up. She lived in the hood in Boston, and I had a drive over to her house. I was all fucking nervous. She lived over there, where the trees was. And I picked her up, she came out, and I was like, come on, let's get in the car, let's go, let's go.

She came out with a bowl of peaches. Just peaches in a bowl. She was like, baby, you want a peach? And I was like, yeah, I think I do. She fed me up. I was like, oh my god, this is the greatest thing that's ever happened to me. I never had that happen, but I hear you.

So let me check this out, man. The one thing that you have this podcast, what is this podcast about? Anything or what is it about? It's called Spheres and Steinberg, the Jew and the Jerk. do we are so anti-political correctness, anti-cancer culture, anti-wokeness. I mean, we talk about every, you know, it's we're flying under the radar

because I just know that if we were bigger than what we are, we would be fucking done. Because I got characters that I do, like I got this one character, uh, some, called Brent Butler. And he's basically like a white 19-20s 30s radio guy. Hi, I'm Brent Butler, yeah. Oh, the niggas and the kikes.

And I-I-I just talk about, I say the most racist, fucked up shit, but I do it in his voice. So it's not as purple. I love that. It's just it's not as hurtful. I love it. Big close Jews. So and we just talk about top of shit man and we don't hold back and I always tell people I kind of look at us like you know liquor and the whole well bitch and error. You know everybody wants to really be who they are. Everybody wants to curse. Everybody wants to drink. Everybody wants to have a good time

and not be so fucking politically correct. And we all, in this illegal time of booze, we are selling booze. That's a fucking great analogy, dude. It's true, I think comedy, the real funny comedy is going to be underground. It's gonna be in the saloons, it's gonna be in the Speake Zs again,

where you're only gonna be, all the mainstream is gonna be all this horseshit, all this fucking politically correct bullshit, and real funny motherfuckers, I just gotta go underground, and you're gonna have to go to the clubs, you're gonna have to find us, we're gonna see real funny us. We'll see real funny comedy. But, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, listen, no, because there's too much money. I mean, I think that there's too much money right now to be made if you tow the line.

If, because nobody wants, listen, you can take a company out, you can get somebody fired, you can have the job taken away, a year away from their fucking pension, you just by tweeting, just by saying he said this, she said that, he did this, he did that. You know what I mean? Comics, I believe are unconsourable. You can't cancel us because of our fan base,

but you can take away the ability to become famous. You can take away the ability to become famous. You can't take away the ability to become mainstream. See, we always, I think comics, we always ran with, we're in standups, we're in the clubs, we're grinding it out with the potential, which happened to you, which happened to me. We both got on TV, right? We were in up fronts flying first class making that fucking money, right? All this shit come in, right? And when you or someone you walk up, you're doing the, you know, the up fronts and you do in the interviews. No, I think this years as to this happens. I mean, she's the funniest. I mean, that's the shows. Thank you, some of this unbelievable. I mean, you can't be funny, funny, and in the line on a press line.

You can't be, all the funny shit I did, I remember, I did all this fucked up shit on the upfronts. None of it made it. All the corny shit made it. Right? So I think that, I think that it's gonna come back but it's, I think we're punk rock again.

I think real funny fucked up comedy is underground punk rock and then trying to kill it. I mean, can't it do this soon, people for saying shit? I mean, yeah, I hope not, man. You know, maybe I'm, maybe I'm being naive and I'm a fool. You're gonna have to sell dick jokes like crack in the round fucking 20 years. Yeah. You can have to be in the back alley,

give him a fucking, you know, his thousand dollars. Yeah, this bitch is pussy smell like fucking cheese. And I lick their ass all. And you have to do it. Fucked up jokes in an alley, like fucking drug addicts. Right. You know, I'm really hoping. I really want to believe that at some point,

a society can become so tired of something that it just rebelled heavy. And I just want to believe that at some point, the comedic society is just going to finally go fuck this, enough's enough. We wanted back to the way it used to be. And comics that are standing in their ground on issues like this, you, me, it's gonna be huge for us.

Because there's gonna be a difference between guys like you, do it me, if people can go, they always stood there ground. They never wavered, no matter what. Versus guys who changed it up to fit the climate and now all of a sudden, I try to be what they never were because that's what's popular again. And people who spot out the real ones from the phony ones, I just believe

this is gonna make a comeback. Yeah, man, you know what, I hope you're right. You're probably right. I mean, I don't know shit, I'm just gonna make a comeback. Yeah, Matt, you know what? I hope you're right. You're probably right. I mean, I don't know shit. I'm just saying stuff. I don't even know. And I wanted to do that accent. I wanted to do that accent.

I wanted to do that little bit. I was just trying to get that crack head bit in. I thought it was funny. He really died, too. He gave me nothing on that. I mean, I thought you'd even, you know, I mean, really, you gave me nothing. I mean, I was trying.

I was a bit, I did a character. I thought you'd fucking, he was like, yeah, really, you gave me, I mean, nothing. I mean, I was trying. I was a little bit, I did a character, I thought you just fucking, he was like, yeah, that was pretty good, you know? But that's all right, thanks. I was deep in my moral convictions, Bobby. Listen, we gotta go, right now, I need to take you into the Patreon Extra. I want you to do a couple,

if you can do because You know, I don't know why we're not friends sooner I fucking I really you stand up you're fucking the way you are the way you don't take shit You know you're MTV, but I mean you're a mad TV all the movies you've done, dude I mean You don't even fucking know all the the movies you've done you've been in I gotta say this to can I just say this real quick Jeremiah you're a fuck I hated you in Jeremiah. I Fucking I had when she beat the shit out of you. I felt like she really hit you too. I felt like she really did. She really did.

She really did. At her. Yeah, she hit you, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. When that was that from a real place, did she really mad? Was that? Did she ask if she could do that? No, I just think she's a solid actress and she went for it, you know, and I know that I was in a solid recipient. Were you mad at that? No, because I knew what it was. And I'm not that blue. No, no, no, I was more in pain, but I wasn't going to blow what this opportunity was, because I couldn't take a hit from a black girl.

I'm going to be taking it from my black mama since Barbara. You know me? Dude, would she hit you and Jerry McGuire? I was a good fuck him. You were being such a You're being stuck in that movie. Jesus Christ We're gonna go to the extra one of the extras 50 right now for patreon only patreon.com slash Robert Kelly the extra one of the extra 50 right now for patreon only patreon.com sass robber Kelly just shine out for you. Yeah, before we do I just got to ask when we before we once we switch over are we out of this now? No we're still in this. Okay, because I just want to give out my podcast one more time. We're gonna give out everything right now. We're gonna give out everything. Yeah I'm

I'm fucking good at this. I know what I'm doing. Fucking nervous Nelly. What are you so nervous about? What do you think I'm just gonna I'm gonna give out everything. Yeah, I'm fucking good at this. I know what I'm doing. Fucking nervous, Nelly. What are you so nervous about? What do you think I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna switch it to a paywall without telling anybody all your shit. This is all I got, baby. Hollywood A high, Remy, Robert. This is all I got.

I'm telling you right now, dude. You got nothing to worry about. You're fucking one of my favorite fucking comedians all around. Seriouslyians all around. Seriously, all around. Fucking funny and just who you are. I fucking love it. So tell everybody what you're,

what you're, where can they find your dates? And most of you have to stuff up. You have his, you got albums too. You got two albums. Am I correct? I'm specials, yeah, two comics, specials, one called. Yeah, one called Hollywood Look, you got two albums. Am I correct? I'm specials, yeah, two comedy specials, one called. Yeah, one called Hollywood Look, I'm Smiling. The other one's called Comedy Blueprint.

All my dates are on my website, ariespheres.com. All my podcast information, Patreon, Facebook, Instagram, can be found at Spearsburg Pod. And I always tell people if you want the links to the podcast, hit me up in my Instagram, airy smears, blue verification, checkmark, slide in my DMs, and I will personally send you the links. It's available for all streaming platforms. You smoke cigars too. I don't.

I smoke cigarettes and weed. Fuck. Yeah. We almost had a perfect friendship, dude. We almost had a fucking perfect friendship. Hey, I can smoke one, which we don't. All right, I'm just saying I saw this a guy, and I'm like, oh my God. This, I'm gonna quit white kid WD. I'm gonna kill that fucking Jewish guy doing the thing.

Me and you are gonna start a podcast, take over the fuck world and smoke cigars. Listen man, let me tell you that. I said that, relax, it's not gonna happen. But I'm kidding, no, no, no. What is your question though? You have to give people the link to the podcast why is that well no it's I mean I have it in my life like it in link tree whatever it's it whatever that is but don't you have a look don't you have a isn't it on Apple or

something yeah it's on Apple it's on Google Spotify okay it's on all that shit but people are dumb man and you know you tell them directions they're fucking idiots. I got some food for these motherfuckers man. Shit, all right check it out. You gotta check out his podcast dude. I mean this is what I love about you dude. You're fucking, you're angry, you're fucking loud, you're silly,

you like geeky shit, you like fucking man shit. Patrice and Dave Chappelle, to me, I think it was the two greatest comedians ever. If they were rappers, they would be biggie and two-pock. And I just, you know, Patrice was a god to me, man. In terms of his fearlessness, his genius, his whiteness, he was so much encompassed into one doom. And I know I'll never be as good as him,

but I want to be damn close. Right, yeah, he's the best. And it's too bad he's not around during this shit would have been hilarious. You know, everybody else says that, if Patrice was around, I would love it. Patrice was around and he just folded, because he got a sick comedy,

just was fucking politically correct and woke. And he hung out with fucking Amy Schumer and fucking, he sold us all out. I don't even think that would be any DNA, man. All right, well, listen, we're going to the extra time right now. You want to be part of that. You want to check it out. Go to patreon.com, sash, rubber, Kelly. Dude, I want you to do a couple, um, some impressions because I've been trying to get to this for an hour You have these whole thing that you do you have impressions that you do that are no fucking joke So we read the names of these people that sign up, but maybe we could have a couple impressions

Some of my favorite ones do Okay, too. I don't I definitely want to do Yeah, Paul Mooney and Tony some proud of it. You do Tony soprano Yeah, oh All right, can you do this right now just to take us out of this say you guys have been listening to the you know what dude podcast Go to patreon.com session rubber Kelly to find out more To that is Tony soprano. I'm gonna say that? Yeah, you do it as Tony Supra. Uh, give me a mouthful.

One more time. Right there, patreon.com says Robert Kelly. Right at the bottom. Go there, right? I'm talking about an angel. Right now you listen to patreon.com. Robert Kelly. I talk to Uncle Judy Jody Shanky at a day.

So fuck a great podcast. Question for show. Holy. He got a fucking listen to it. She got a business. I thought Uncle Judy Johnny sent you the day. So fuck a great podcast. Question for Cheryl, Molly. You got a fucking listen to it. She got the bitch. It's fucking crazy.

Crazy. Sorry, how the page turned out? You know, I was probably telly right now. I was still gonna come on. She keeps talking about the fucking Russian. I said I'm broken off with her. I don't even know what you're talking. You keep talking about the fuck arrest. I said I broke it off for that I don't even know what you're still gonna Everybody's gotta go mom. Paulie. I see you in prison at the pain of the edit. I think she's putting fuckers. God great show

Uh, dude. Thank you for coming on this Thank you. I especially to the latest pocket to say when you guys Uh, go to the podcast. I know where it like episode 250 something but if you can start from episode one and go in order Because it really matters comedically in terms of the callbacks the evolution and the growth of the show If you listen out of sequence certain jokes you might not get certain things character wise might make make sense to you. So start from episode one There you go. I'll fucking do it too. I'm gonna start listening We'll tell everybody again. Where where can we see you? First of all, you got to go see him live That's that's what he does. Go see him live check out his podcast buy his app get his app and

CM live check out his podcast buy his app get his app and Make sure you follow him on all social media and and go check out his you really want to fucking see some interesting stuff Go check him out on YouTube all his interviews. He's done on Vlad on all these I mean fucking so opinionated so he's got his own voice and just a Common sense funny motherfucker. So where can they go? It's a it's your website is what again? Areaspears.com my Instagram everything is my name my patreon Areaspears Instagram Facebook Areaspears And for the podcast on Instagram Facebook. It's spears burg pod SPE are S be RG POD on Instagram, Facebook, it's Spears Burg Pod, S-P-E-R-S-B-E-R-G-P-O-D.

Great. Everybody wants to know where you're going to be when you're coming back to Palm Beach Improv. And I definitely want to have you back on the show soon, dude. So Bobby, I've been in. 17. 17. He got me 17 17 what do we're working our way up? We're getting to yeah, we're getting up there I don't fucking we get we get a lot of people we got I think we got 24,000 on YouTube Subscribers, but all of our stuff comes from downloads audio mainly and patreon. We got a nice patreon little we got three little pockets of nice fan But mainly the ykwds downloaded on the rss. Feud which is But yeah, don't ever ask me that on this again and embarrass you sorry

You've been doing it for 10 years and I know how hard it is. Like, I've only been doing it for three to build an audience. So I'm just like, I would have imagined 10 years in the game, you know. Well, you know what it is, man? It's like Betrie said, not to bring him up again. You know, we got to get each other over. And a lot of people cover it, they're fame. A lot of people cover it there.

You know what I mean? I try not to do that. You know, I have anybody and anybody on my show. And I want my fans of this show to fucking go and be fans of the people that I bring on. That's kind of my thing. So, you know, some other people, you know, only have certain people on and blah, blah, blah. But this is, it is what it is. You know what I mean? So, I hope

everybody goes and checks you out, because you are fucking funny and a great guy. So, make sure you do it. Thanks for coming on, buddy. I really appreciate it. Anytime, but anytime. All you guys, ladybugs, thanks for coming on. We have the next... What's that? Oh, shit. All right, we have the names. Here's the thing. I read all the new names. How many we got this time?

We have six, but a lot of returns. All right, you got all the names we read them. Is there any way you can read them as fucking Tony Soprano and Paul Mooney? Yeah, how do I see their names? They're coming up right now. There you go. Can you see him? Yeah, I'm showing him, Laura. I'll show you. All right. This first motherfucker, Tim Olson. Tim Olson. I know this motherfucker's white because his name is Tim every nigga named Tim that's black was a sell-up I like this next one

Tony Godman Tony Godman you can tell he's a fucking Italian. He's probably sitting on right now with a decent fucking cap a colo And a couple go this mouth right fucking now. How you doing, Dona? Dona, I'm Tony. Ryan B. Benzies. Ryan B. Benzies. Niggas last names, how's Mexican? Niggas, let me see your papers.

Oh, it was just next fucking guy. EJ way. EJ fucking way. I don't know any fucking Italians they need. Shit. The fuck is going on here? Hards, clowns. Cool ass. Hards. Look at that.

That's German. Your ass is German. You probably cooking juice right now. Let's speak. Uh, Danish. Slash fucking name is Danish. Sounds like a fucking Finnish disease. I talked to my son, E.J.

He had a date. So what's wrong with your balls you said that I got tenies the best I was the best name read we've ever done with any guests you thank your brother it's the party master listen man fucking thank you man we I can't wait to I can't wait to see I hope to see you on stage somewhere, maybe perform somewhere together, man. Yeah, man, I'm glad we finally hooked up and got to hang out, even if it's on this Zoom or Streamyard ship, man. Thanks for coming on.

And make sure you check him out. Mush might be swore as go check him out on everything. Follow him everywhere. Ladybugs in so or as go check him out on everything. Follow him everywhere. Ladybugs in the chat, all the Patreon people. Thank you for being a member of my Patreon. If you're not a member of patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. And you know what I want you to do. If you're watching this on YouTube, I need you to do this, that, then this, then that. but mainly fucking this and that all right subscribe Your comments your subscription your likes throw us into the algorithm put it out there for more people to see that me more people enjoyed the show and This one was a doozy so I really want people to see this so make sure you hit those button subscribe and like and

That's it much right we got nothing else. I want you to check out these guys. F-U-M, F-U-M, they might help me out. I got these hand-ex from all this shit. I'm putting in all the goddamn, the allergies. So instead of smoking some guys, I've been walking on these, these guys are great. Check them out, a room of therapy that helps you quit smoking, helps you sign.

This helps you just relax a little bit. What else, mush? Come look wearables.com. Wearables.com, man. I got, look at this shirt right here. There it is. The new YKWD shirt, YKWD. It's wearables.com. You got Calthar and Kelly stuff. You get the YKWD with every shirt, come stickers right there. So make sure you go check them out and this shirt right here, bring up the Robert Kelly

face. What the fuck everybody's buying this shirt. Aaron Berg just bought this shirt and he's wearing it. Everybody loves the squiggly Robert Kelly shirt. Use code word ladybugs. Code word ladybugs to get yourself 20% off all shirts. Comment whereables.com. Check that out. You guys are the best fans in the world. This was a fun one. We'll see you guys next time on You Know What Dad. Later. You've been listening to the YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. you