Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Erik Griffin | Leaky Gut
Episode Date: November 2, 2020This week Bobby's joined by Erik Griffin from Workaholics and Riffin With Griffin! We get into what's going on in LA, having to change gears in comedy, and how online gaming changed everything for Eri...k! For advertising opportunities email: advertise@thelaughbutton.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hoy es un dÃa de eso de no saber cómo va a acabar el dÃa.
¿Dónde nadie pregunta, ¿dónde viene?
¿Si no, por qué no te viene?
Y una ronda es el tiempo que pasa entre no conocernos
y no creer olvida.
Hoy es un dÃa de eso que Madrid nos lia.
Hoy es un dÃa de eso que Madrid nos encuentra.
Maú, la vida es más vida cuando nos encontramos.
Encuentra en los bares de Madrid la dicción especial de Madrid nos lia.
Un número de ma mal, a Madrid. I started social media podcasts
Like the WD's back again Old school back in the day
We're all started before them all
I think I like it
I think I like it
This podcast is so fun and crazy
And there's no rules
You're ruining this
For some more, I'm gonna have to first try
And then it's comedy podcasts
This is an NPR
That's what the podcast does Is there any better show This is the original original Sorry
We've been mushed right out of the gate
We got mushed because he played the wrong video.
Hi, mushy. Hey, Bobby. How's it going?
If we don't get mushed, if you don't get mushed, it's going to be a bad show. That's all I'm saying. So this is going to be a great show because we got mushed the second it started.
Tell us what's happening mush.
Well, we have an awesome guest today. We have Eric Griffin on from the Riffin with Griffin podcast,
Workaholics.
So happen to have them on the day.
Yeah, I'm fucking horrible.
One of my favorite people that I don't really know, but I do know.
Yeah, I know what you mean.
You know what it's like, it's because when you do comedy,
it's like you work at a super Walmart.
And like I see you over in produce, but I'm over in the, you know, I'm over in the,
the, the, the fashion area.
And then we like, why do I have break room?
Why do I have to be in produce in your fashion?
That's all in that scenario.
You're at the bakery.
And the point I was going at, Eric, are you like a butcher actually?
You being a meat department.
Do they have, we don't have a butcher at a Walmart, do they? I'm sure that, Eric. Are you like a butcher actually? You being a meat department. Yeah. Did I have a butcher at a Walmart, do they?
I'm sure they do.
I'm sure they do.
Yeah, and a big Walmart in a sun little town
and where this is the biggest thing in town,
of course they got a butcher.
I thought that meat came in with the bikes.
No, do Walmart is just like Facebook,
whatever someone else is doing,
they're gonna take it and try to do it better.
They're gonna buy it or if people don't sell it, then they're gonna take it and try to do it better They're gonna buy it or if they don't sell if people don't sell it then they're gonna do it
Well, I wish they'd start doing massage paulers. How great was that be?
Go ahead and get a nice hot soup in hamburger. I would not be surprised if there isn't a Walmart out there where they have
Massage is going on. Yeah nice, 20 fat hamburger meat and a hand job.
You know, when you go to Wal-Mart's out in like Texas or in the, you know,
Southern places, they always have some dude in the parking lot,
cook and meet like a barbecue.
And well, people tailgate in those towns to go to
Walmart you know what I mean like the
I went to one of the guys just like yeah dude I got a deer I killed the deer
last week and I think that's Alc that's what he said I think that's Alc I've never
I didn't know what a super Walmart man. I just thought okay,
this is a big store until I was in like Montana and this was the biggest thing in town like
they sold everything there. Yeah, like they got here's the thing and I don't know maybe I'll never
I feel like I don't know if you can relate to this. I feel like I'll never be, maybe I'll never, I feel like, and I don't know if you can relate to this.
I feel like I'll never be famous.
I was never meant to be truly famous
because I go to Walmart and I feel at home.
I'm like, I love everything here.
I wanna buy the jackets, the shirts, the hats,
everything they have.
I'm like, this is perfect. I buy is perfect. I just can't be in a place
where you can buy an underwear on one aisle and then a one aisle over grapes. You know what
I mean? I just don't like that. You know Rob, I got to tell you with these glasses, you
look like a hipster Lex Luthor, I really liked this. You know, I thought something else.
I thought something else was coming, but I really like this.
You're like, you're a hip lex luther. I like this.
You lost a lot of weight, dude.
Yeah, I'm down about 25, 26 pounds.
Corn team's been good to me.
You got this bid going now.
You looked very, and you showed there's a kind of jack that you're working out out of some you look the last time I saw you a little rounder
Yeah, well
You can say fat
And I thought you're gonna die me and you were both gonna fight wherever we were
I was like oh one of us is grabbing our chest this weekend. Yeah, man
You look good, dude. You look great. Well, you know, I just, well, part of the problem, I mean, not to the brink of podcast
down to a screeching emotional halt, but like, so my mom has dementia, you know, and
so when you, when you read about and find out like how these things come about, you know,
it's like, it's about inflammation, cholesterol, vitamin deficiency.
There's all these things that will, that will lead down a path to that.
And I said, well, damn, if my mom has dementia, it's 78 years old, 79 years old.
I'm like, hey, I don't want to do everything I can possibly do to make sure that it doesn't
happen because of things that I'm doing.
So.
So much.
Let's start the show and so who do we got to go?
I'm believable.
Lizard, man, I hear you.
I'm 50.
I just turned 50.
And in December, I was in a rubah with my kid.
And I'm looking around and I'm like,
I'm fucking obese, I'm done.
I couldn't fit and we rented this four wheeler.
At one point, we almost got hit by a car
because my stomach wouldn't let the wheel turn.
My belly button hurting,
you kept getting caught on the wheel.
It wouldn't land.
Are you, are you, are you,
are you, are you, are you can just drive by doing like this.
It was it was uh it was fucking terrifying and I was out of breath and we did all the shit that I've been doing for years in a room. I haven't gone there for 20 years and this year I was
like oh I I'm not I'm not able to do this. I got a seven year old and he's going to have to uh
I mean he's probably if I away, he'll probably wind up
with a way better dad.
I mean, my chick will find a fireman or a plumber
or some in-shape construction worker in a month and a half.
But that's how I feel too about my chick.
I was like, you know what?
I made a promise, I say,
because I'm now engaged to two, by the way.
And I was like, and I said, and I was like,
oh, I got,. And I was like, and I said, and I was like, Oh, I got it. My goal is to like
go on our honeymoon and I could have my shirt off and not be embarrassed. So
I had I remember this photo in the wall from me and her in Aruba and me shirtless and looking fantastic. And I've had to wear that fucking stupid sun shirt.
You know, the one that it's protecting me from the sun.
No, it's protecting onlookers from.
It's protecting me from getting rolled back into the ocean. It's nothing on that.
All right, no, it was a whale joke.
All right.
We just let it go.
You know what I mean?
I thought you had a thing you wanted to whip up there.
Oh, you mean bold statement.
Dude, I relate. I
Dead I I I relate it's just it's time it sucks that I could I had I feel like this happens with everybody though at like 30s and 40s
Something happens it happens with a lot of people not everybody. I hate when I say everybody But, and then all of a sudden you get happy and you meet
somebody and you start pounding on the weight. And then you're like around 50 or something and
you lay 40s like, I'm done. I'm out. It's time to get back into shape. It's time to get my stuff
together. And because I, you know, what is it? 25 more years? Maybe I have on the planet.
On the planet. That's what I do. I felt the same way because I think what happens is you get into late 40s and you know, things
happen, like things that used to happen fast happen super slow and things that used to
happen slow happen fast.
So what I mean by that is like, you know, I'm talking about half a donut and I'll put
on 16 pounds, you know, like just, just out of nowhere, you
know, you just think like, I'm good this week. And the next thing you know, your stomach
is hurting and you're like, what am I doing? So it's like, you, you know, you start feeling
old fast and things start to affect you. And then, but then if you have a person in your
life that you really care about, and you're like, then you start thinking about other things,
because as a comic, we're so selfish and self-absorbed. And then when you get someone in your life and in your case, you have kids,
that's when we start to go, oh, this isn't just for me. You're saying to yourself, I want to be on
a beach in a rubah with my kid for 10 more years and not feel like I have to be carried around in a Yes, you know, so I told you yeah, it no it is it is
It is true. I've been a plus
There's more shit you have to do now like back in my 20s in early 30s
I didn't really have to be physical. It was more. I wanted to be fun stupid shit picking up again
But basketball
Roll a blade right all that shit. I have to be physical now.
I have to go on the backyard.
I have to move shit, pick shit up, rake shit, do things.
And I know I hire people for certain things.
But I gotta do this shit.
And I have a seven year old.
He wants to fucking play.
He wants, he doesn't give a fuck that I,
my toes tingle when I get up in the morning.
I don't care about my plant the fasciitis.
Yeah, come on daddy.
Let's go.
I'm just going.
I'm sure there's some more ailments.
You know, just like 10 minutes later. We're like Jesus.
It's I think I do have a leaky gut. I don't know what that is. But I'm sure you have a
leaky gut. What's what's what's a leaky gut? Well, it's like when you eat certain types of food,
it's like, it's what keeps your stomach fat.
And I'm finding out the bopsy thinks I'm going to these
like preventative medicine health places now.
So I'm going to, I don't just like,
you know, it's like a Western thing is to go to the doctor
when you're sick, but there are medical places you can go
to help you prevent from getting sick,
help you keep healthy.
So I'm going to those kind of places right now where they go,
like, okay, so you need to take this stomach stuff to,
I took a food sensitivity test and it blew my mind.
You're not going to like a place with like the,
I'm a Guatemalan lady puts a chicken liver out of your fucking stomach, right?
No, no, no, I'm not going to those kind of places, but I mean,
but you know, hey, you do what you got to do in our age, you know
But yeah, there's leaky god. I love I love this. We're all producers on the fly, but so there are
You know, there are things you could you know, you could do like you know
So now I'm taking like I mean last is and I'm taking like a fish oil tablets
I'm taking my vitamin like I didn't realize I took like a baseline
Fish oil tablets, I'm taking my vitamin. Like I didn't realize, I took like a baseline blood test
and you find out that I was vitamin D deficient.
And you'd be surprised, like half the country
is vitamin D deficient.
And you don't realize that you are and how it affects you.
So I'm taking vitamin D and everything
to my nail started growing better.
My hair was looking luscious.
Sorry.
And, ah, you know, so.
Man, listen.
So I'm just saying there's like, there's So I'm just saying there's a lot of play.
There's a lot of play.
I'm taking vitamin D and my hair doesn't get delicious.
I'm gonna be mad at you.
But it also helps with your mood.
I mean, there's just a lot of things that we don't know.
What's wrong with my mood?
Yeah, you've been vitamin D deficient for a long time.
No, but you know, there's a lot of different things that you could. Let me
ask you question. Are you still in LA? Yeah, yeah. I was born in LA. I'm not leaving LA because like
these people that are left LA, they came to LA because they wanted to be whatever. And then now
they're like realizing it is not going to happen here now. So it's like, why not be someplace else
where the taxes are lower and cost the living is cheaper.
So you're staying, you're not leaving.
No, I'm not leaving, I'm staying in LA, you know.
I hope they all leave and it comes back
and you're the only one there and you can everything.
Yeah, who are you telling?
You know, this business is so weird anyway.
So you know, you just, you just got you just, you just gotta pivot wherever you can
and that's what happened to me with this stupid pandemic,
you know, I just, I switched into gaming, you know,
which you can see me daily on Twitch on
Eric Griffin gaming.
What, what, what am I, why don't I have this type of stuff?
So catch me on Eric Griffin gaming on Twitch daily, you know what I mean?
And what is that?
I
Game, you know, so I play Call of Duty and and and the kids watch me and they cheer me on and you know, I got like money
Yeah
Talking of mush. Why am I doing this?
This podcast and shit when I can be playing video games in the shed and making money with teenagers. Yeah
That's it. I'm doing sounds weird, but listen. Yeah
But you have to pivot in whatever way you can so like so podcasting became huge for like a lot of people
Especially some of the larger LA comics they went into podcasting and we realized that hey
We're our own entity our own studio our own thing. We don't really need Hollywood.
It was paying sitcom money to these guys,
and even more.
So then they're like, so why be in LA
when you could do your sitcom from anywhere?
You could do your podcast from anywhere.
I mean, look, I pivoted, luckily,
my number one best friend, Mike Calta, who you know,
he was like, let's do this.
We've been wanting to work together for a long time,
and this just made it righteous.
So we do a show Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday,
and the Jericho party on Saturday,
which definitely pivoted, but it's, you know,
I love video games.
I would love to fucking, imagine playing a video,
how many days do you have to play though? This is, I play every day, you know, I love video games. I would love to fucking, imagine playing a video, how many days do you have to play though?
This is, I play every day, you know,
because I have subscribers.
So that's how you keep them engaged and interested.
You gotta just keep doing it, you know?
So you play every single,
how many subscribers you have on air-gryph and gaming?
Yeah.
Hahaha.
Hahaha.
What am I ever saying?
Hahaha.
So you get like, no, I mean, it's like, you know, there's guys just to put it in perspective.
Like that kid ninja, I don't know if you know who that is, but he's a huge, he's the biggest
streamer in the world, you know what I mean?
He has, he makes $500,000 a month.
A month?
Yeah, just to put it in.
Yeah, a month, a month.
Like, what am I doing? A month. Yeah, just to put it in. Yeah, a month. A month.
Like, what am I doing?
Like gaming is way, it's, I was going to say, huge year if that's a word, but it's, yeah,
it is.
That's, it's hugeer than comedy first year.
What are you checking that?
Gaming is like, because these people, the gaming world is crazy.
They're just continuously watching, every single day, people are watching from work.
They just have it on their phone,
and they're just in there on for hours.
They're just, yeah, that's the guy Ninja.
He's a phenomenon, man.
He's just, and there's a lot of people like that.
Nick Merk's, this guy, Swag, there's like hundreds
of these guys that have a large subscriber base.
You know, if they have like,
I'm back up for a second.
I do understand I was gaming on a fucking
dowel back in the day soldier of fortune. Okay. And then I went, and then I, well,
do it. I'm talking before they had Xbox. I was game. Okay. I invented the
clan, the gaze, GAAA YX. Okay. The we're huge. I was ranked 23 in the world on Call of Duty.
Well, I don't know what you're doing. I don't know why you're not getting back into it.
What are I honestly don't understand what like it's so simple.
Like you're getting my wife. You're your producer guy. Right. Yeah. He'll he'll he'll get you involved
And then you have one of these
I want a flippy thing
What else do you got?
That's it. I just got like you know when this gets to be too much. I'm just gonna put this on the screen. This is a nightmare
You know, cuz I'm doing it right from my streaming program, but I'm just saying so just to get back to
it, it was just like, I, you know, because I don't know how you felt, but when stand-up
just completely stopped, I was like, I was depressed because I was like, what am I now?
You know?
Like I'm doing this seven nights a week.
You know, like what a, you know, even if just half the time for pleasure, not even for
money, you know, just
Yeah, and then like what am I going to do in my life? How am I going to get my thoughts out? How am I going to, you know, get you know
I don't know and then so I had to like really feel like oh, I guess I'm more than this. I'm a personality
I'm error-griffing and then how can I parlay that into other things?
You know besides and then and then the podcast too. I was sick of doing it because I was like why am I doing this podcast because this is supposed to help me sell tickets and and there's no tickets to be sold. So what am I doing this for it?
So I had all these thoughts you know so I'm back on track now you, but regular guy when we're from
But you can but you can also, you know, Instagram and Twitter at
aerographic
Usually we do that stuff towards the end, but I mean
I
Yeah, I like my crazy but
I got to work my way.
My producer never promoted me this much on my own show.
He really liked you.
He liked you a lot.
You understand that?
If he doesn't like you, he would have just been pulling up your website right now.
Now, so it is true that all these people leave in LA and it seems like Rogan's trying to get people
to move, trying to make that Austin thing the new spot.
Is that what I'm feeling?
It's not gonna last.
It's easy for someone that has $300 million
to live wherever they want.
You know what I mean?
It's easy for somebody who like,
he's not a irregular human being anymore.
Like it's totally fine for him to have 10 houses
and you know, and 10 different places
and be like, oh, this is home and that's home.
Yeah, great.
You know, you and then, you know,
he's got enough money to like,
he can fly his guests in if he wants.
Hey, come in, stay on my ranch.
You're gonna eat elk for, you know,
we're gonna, you know,
it's a whole experience he's having,
so it's fine.
Yeah.
Everyone else, like it's like,
okay, you can move into Austin for what?
Is your family there?
Like, what do you got going on?
I think these people are making a huge mistake.
Unless you go to a place where you know you wanna like,
like plant some roots, okay.
But if you're just gonna go, you're gonna be there,
and for sure, after a while, you're gonna be like,
what the hell am I doing? And people are leaving. Okay, but if you're just gonna go you're gonna be there and for sure after a while you're gonna be like what's up?
Hell am I doing in?
People are leaving
People are leaving though not because I mean, it's a bunch of shit
I mean, it's the taxes the business is dead. There's no reason to be in California
Auditions are done through digital means now you can be anywhere in the world on your iPhone.
You don't need to be out in L.A. to do audition.
There's no more pilots.
He's in really, um, and, um, you know, uh, and the homelessness is
fucking outrageous.
I mean, they're just living outside now.
It's probably going to get worse.
But that's, but that's where for every, I mean, they're just living outside now. It's probably going to get worse than it's being done.
But that's where for everywhere,
everywhere that there's warm weather,
the homeless problem is bad.
So I just got on you.
Yeah, but it's becoming acceptable to have encampments.
And people are like, why am I paying this much money
to have this house or this apartment
Which is the highest rent in the country is LA and have a guy
Hypodermic deals in my backyard and a fucking tent behind my house or the guy shitting in my back driveway
What am I doing? Why am I living here? Let me go
Summer else is nothing. Well, that's an unfair depiction because it's not like that everywhere
But I at the same time I do understand what you're saying. There's like, you know every freeway you drive by the underpass
It's like a new neighborhood and stuff and it's just like it is a sad situation
Yeah, but I don't think we're fixing it anywhere and it's just like you know, so it it's like, yeah, you can move away and be like, I don't wanna see the problem, but, you know,
there's like, you know, the home of situation
is going on everywhere, especially when you're
in the warm weather.
Like, you know, like, New York, for instance,
like that comment we just saw,
I can't stand New York, that place stinks.
I'm talking about it stinks.
It smells like human shit in New York that place stinks. I'm talking about it stinks. It smells like human shit in New York City.
You walk and by the way, and you can smell,
you go, oh, that's somebody has some Chinese food off,
80 second in, you know what I mean?
Like that's how distinctly that play, it's just stinks.
So like during the summer months,
it's just like, I'm like, why would anyone want to live here
with all these people on top of you all the time and it smells like shit
So like every place has a problem
People are leaving here now too though people leaving New York and LA to go to other places that are cheaper to live
Because you know, you don't have to be
If those clubs aren't open.
Why am I open?
Why are you there?
If the store is not open, what the fuck are you doing?
Wait, wait, for comedy?
I don't know what those comics in New York are doing because the difference between New
York and LA is these media, all those mediocre comics in New York, they actually
can make a living doing comedy going to like, you know, eight spots a night in all these
little places that are open and making $15, $10, $20. I mean, that's the thing about New
York that's different from LA. You can't make a living as a comedian in LA. So I think
a lot of people were getting by, what are they doing now?
And then I'll tell you what they're doing. They're collecting unemployment and making way
more money than I've ever made doing stand. And they're still doing those little sneaky
spots for no money. But this, you know, so it's actually great to be a stand up, a mediocre
stand up in New York right now, because you don't have any overhead,
you're probably paying five, six hundred, eight hundred bucks a month for rent, you're making six
hundred bucks a week on unemployment and everything's under the table. It's going to dry up though.
It might be- I'm sorry, I ended. Oh, yeah. They actually just gave more money mush.
I know they gave me they actually just gave more money much
To be honest. Oh man. Well, you know, I'm saying but I'm saying but even still man, you know
Why would you like you're in New York and it's about to start getting cold? I'm not eating on our New York side first of all just eating on sidewalks in the first place is like go fuck yourself
You know what I mean like?
You know like I'm in the LA,
so I'm driving down Beverly Hills, man.
I'm driving in Beverly Hills, you know,
off Santa Monica, you know, you drive by Beverly Hills.
And then I'm looking at these fancy, like crustaceans,
this is a super fancy restaurant.
And they got people sitting on the sidewalk,
you know, they got plants out there
to try to make it look good.
And I'm like, are you kidding me?
You know, it's like, so like, but this is LA,
the weather's nice.
Like what is gonna happen?
Because one thing I know about New York,
it seems to me like 80% of the businesses are restaurants.
You know, when you're walking out of street,
it's like pizza place, Thai place,
Chinese place, Indian place, Jamaican food,
you know, all these different restaurants.
What's gonna happen in these cold months?
So I don't know, you know, I don't know, dude.
I don't fucking know what's gonna happen.
It's a good point.
I think that, you know, it was fun for the summer
having these little outdoor places
and it was kind of very much like Montreal or, you know,
Canada, the way they just did that, but you're right.
I mean, they're gonna enclose them and-
What are you gonna have at lamps?
I don't know.
This, listen, we should be safe,
everybody wear a mask and all that, you know?
But at a certain point, at a certain point,
we're getting to like, where these two worlds
are starting to collide, like where people need to make
living and we need the economy to thrive. And then this thing about people getting sick and getting sick
These things are kind of collide and one of them's gonna win and the other one what what's gonna happen man
I just don't know what is going on do. I was talking about this on my podcast
I'm looking at these numbers like these graphs, you know, you got went to John Hopkins website
Because they have a good COVID tracker because you can't I don't know who you could trust with this information anyway.
Yeah, but you look at you look at the graphs, right? So here's a graph like of California. So when they first started, we had this huge spike and then it went down and then now it's still sort of rising because it's higher than when it was when it started, right?
But you look at these graphs. So I looked at California's graph and then I looked at Florida's graph, for instance. They look exactly the same, but Florida has been open this whole time.
Right.
So when I show there in two weeks, but when I see a state that has been open most of the
time, versus a state that's been mostly closed, And if they have the same looking graph,
what are we doing?
I know.
But if you say that,
people are gonna assume you're voting for Trump.
No, I'm voting for, that doesn't even matter.
But I don't care about that.
I'm talking about like, my business is shut down.
There are restaurants here in California
that have been open for a hundred years
that are going out of business forever.
Absolutely. There's like, you know, this is going to have a long lasting effect.
And I'm saying it's like, you know, the way we're reacting, it's as if the death rate
is at 50% or 20%. I had a fight with a friend of mine, Saturday. He's like, yeah, dude,
the numbers are going up. I'm like, yeah, dude, the numbers are going up.
I'm like, yeah, but how many people are dying?
That's all that matters to me.
Because if the numbers go up,
that means more people got tested, they had it.
But if 10 people die from that, who, I mean, yeah,
that happens, but it's not, it doesn't mean we're fucked.
Everybody's dying.
When everybody's dying. Right, right. That's what I'm saying to you like I look you look at the death toll and you go like we don't want anyone to die by the way
But like how is death toll compared to the regular the regular death toll of the people that die from the flu every single year?
Right, you know, you know why though Eric is it's it's politicized right now. Oh, dude. I saw this great
I saw this great pod hate to cut you out because you gonna like this. I saw this post on Instagram and it said.
There isn't he said there isn't a COVID problem with the homeless because they don't have
televisions. That's funny. It's true. It's politicized man. This though thing is to scare the
shit out of people one way or the other. You know what I mean? And you're right. You go to Florida. They've been open. I was there.
Whether 100% open. I mean, and the thing too is that you would think that, okay, so I understand
when we first started, we had to shut down because they weren't sure how this was going to spread
and how it was going to affect the hospital system, which is important.
So they said, okay, we got shut this down in case because we can't, if a million people
get sick at once, what are we going to do?
They didn't know how to deal with it.
They thought they needed ventilators.
They thought all these things.
They didn't know.
Actually, here we are now.
The hospitals are not overrun.
Okay.
Like, and if they were, trust me, to liberal media would be outside, you know, CNN would
be outside every hospital going, people can't even get in because of all the COVID cases.
That is not the case.
So what are we doing?
That's what I'm saying.
That's my point of the thing.
What are we doing?
I don't know.
Why can't I be safe?
By the way, I'm not saying not being safe.
I'm not asking.
You know, it's all wear masks.
We should all have social distancing.
But why is our economy shut down like this?
Why can you have this business and that business open
and not a comedy club?
And why can't we do it safe?
Bro, they're opening theme parks.
Get the fuck out of here, man. No podemos ser seguros. Bro, están en las piezas de las piezas. ¿Qué se hace aquÃ, chico?
nine euros. Volotea.
Tarifa, sujetas a disponibilidad consulta las condiciones en volotea.com.
So that tells me that like so don't you know, you know, let me take something else, men,
I really didn't wear a brand about this.
Don't talk to me about health and safety and McDonald's.
It's still open.
Okay.
Yeah.
Fuck you.
All right.
Yeah.
All these people out here, especially the liberal side, they're always like, we the
mass and we have
you should wear a mass and you need to be safe and we need to look.
Okay, so but you don't care about, you don't care about that McDonald's has been killing
people for a hundred years.
You don't care that like so we're gonna talk about health and safety, then let's talk
about health and safety.
Let's look at heart disease and all these kinds of things that we can prevent.
We ain't shutting the fucking economy down for that.
No. How many people die from obesity, from fucking trans fat, from all the fucking fast food shit,
Coca-Cola? How many people lose feet? And you're going to open up a fucking theme park,
and with things that were created to make people throw up and
That's gonna be fine. Don't you got your ice cream nobody would care
You know what you know what the problem is and it's in a so politicized right and it's like especially the liberal side the conservative side you know
Oops, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. What's that? What's that? What's that?
Sorry, the liberal side is like obesity is liberals global warming,
okay? Because 99% of scientists say obesity is a killer, but these fucks want to be like,
no, feel good about you. You know, you, you know, you, you know, you, you, you, you, you, you,
you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, no, no, no, if they're, yeah. So what I'm saying is like,
if we're gonna talk about health and safety,
then let's talk about health and safety.
And it's just to me, it feels like
we're not really talking about health and safety.
We're just, this is some kind of weird thing, man.
This pandemic was perfect for the left,
the fire left it's because it's like,
now we get to fucking use this to say these guys suck
we're gonna save you now it's life or death it's life or death when in reality there's
fucking things like food corn syrup cornstarch Doritos all those bullshit that they stick down
our kids malls at a young age cereals are you mind fucking Stereo. I know a bowl of candy. A bowl of candy. They're addicted to it. When I was a kid, you had one
You got candy once or twice a year. You got candy at Halloween and you got a ribbon candy at fucking at your aunt's house
At the same time though, it started in our generation though. They used to have commercials for sugar, C-N-H,
pew pew.
Sugar.
Sugar.
It was actually sugar, not fucking corn syrup,
corn start, corn glucose, which is poison.
They don't allow it in Europe.
I'm just saying, if you want to talk about health,
if you want to talk about health, if you want to talk about then let's have
a conversation about health beyond like we should be telling people where masks instead
of putting hamburgers in your mouth.
Okay.
Like where masks instead of drinking sugar.
Like if you want to talk about what's good for our health then let's really talk about
what's good for our health.
But because I'm just yeah, yeah, yeah, because I'm really getting tired of all this,
um, you know, it's very important.
It's very important to me and my wife, uh, you know, meals, like my wife cooks
meals breakfast, lunch, and we sit down as a family to have dinner.
If I'm home, we're sitting at the table with no nothing,
and we're gonna eat dinner together,
and it's a home cooked meal,
and hopefully, good, healthy food.
Once in a while, we'll fuck off.
You know what I mean?
But I hang out with other people's kids,
and it's literally garbage.
They fucking give them garbage all day long. And then other families instead of just their kids, Bobby.
What's that?
You should say you hang out with other families instead of just their kids.
Yeah, that sounded a little weird.
Well, he made it weird.
You gamers make it weird because you fucking make it weird.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Listen to you listen.
If you pulled up to a school in a van looking the way you look, let me tell you something. I know you're bonding over some horse shit and I don't like it.
All right.
I don't like it.
You look like fucking moushies uncle.
Hey, that's what it is, man. We worked together
in San Antonio. We do like we're related. San Antonio. This is my thing, right? I can
shoot my lower thirbs up. Yeah, stick it. Wow, you look really old when you do that. Yeah,
stick it. You know what? You know what? we're finding out about these comedy clubs, man?
They're just buildings.
That's what they're doing.
That's great. You know what?
I fucking, God, the American, you're really, you're making me sick today because you're on point.
You really are just a smart young man. Well, old, but listen, you're absolutely right.
That was, uh, I couldn't put my finger on it, but you just laid it out righteous
I did a comedy show and a baseball stadium Saturday night just as fun
Just as funny you need a mic. That's the one thing about comics that they forget is we only need a crowd and a microphone
is we only need a crowd and a microphone. And we've been making it out like they're the important thing
and they're controlling everything.
And it's like, nah man, when we come out of this,
they're gonna need us more than we need them.
And we don't need to do six shows, by the way.
Yeah, like what are you doing, man?
We only need to really do one and sell all those tickets
to one show and then go to another
town and you'll make way more money.
Well, they need to, well, I mean, I get why they do that.
I mean, they got to keep it.
They're, you know, they got to keep their business up.
They got to pay this stupid rents that they have and like they make, they, you know, economy
clubs, they make bad deals.
They make really bad deals.
They go into a mall where they have to pay $30,000 a month
to be in this mall.
And then they try to take it out on the comics.
And it's only the huge comics that really,
that it doesn't matter for them.
Because it's like, I always say this,
headliners change the ticket price.
You know, I got to close the show and you're going to get a great show,
but you're not truly a star headliner until the ticket price has changed.
Because that's where they make their money.
You know, if a comedy club is, if it's usually $20 a ticket,
and then someone's so coming in a town, they'd change it to 50.
Now that comedy club is still making that $20
that they were making and not giving it to the comic
the way they used to.
Now they just, they still got that
and that extra 30s, how they're gonna pay this star comic.
The Xeroman and amount of money that they're gonna make.
So, you know, now we're going with because of podcasting
and because of doing direct to consumer entertainment, you know,
we're saying to our audience, hey, come to this little theater.
And the comedy was booming before this happened, man, it was booming.
Comics were doing theaters and they were all over the place.
And I never thought something was shut it down.
Here it is.
Shut it down, but as fast as it's shut it, then we didn't even get any breaks.
Yeah, man.
We didn't even get to slow down for the light.
We just, and I've, I even get to slow down for the light. We just,
And I've come to like really enjoy this,
the time I've had off.
I've come to enjoy it.
I've gotten so close to my lady
and like I say, now we're engaged
and I've started to like prioritize
what's important in my life
and I guess I needed this little break.
I wish we had a world shutdown day,
shut down week every year.
I mean, if you're a conspiratorist, and you believe in the illuminati and Bill Gates and
all those type people are in a room, they say, okay, so how can we get rid of people who
have not been taking care of themselves?
Let's make sure kids don't get affected.
Let's get rid of fat and people with these preconditions
that are like-
Old people.
Old people.
Old people.
Pensions, Social Security.
Yeah, let's get rid of all this.
Yeah, all the people sucking up resources,
let's wipe them out.
And also check this,
we can improve the environment at the same time.
Yeah, at all.
How can we do that?
How can we do that?
Somebody said, I got an idea, there's this virus
I can we can release.
And then we can make control it with fear.
And, you know, I mean, if you're,
I'm saying it sounds like a great movie, you know what I mean?
It sounds like a great movie.
I was just talking about that with somebody,
actually a big name comic who caught me a moron
for actually coming up with that.
I'm like, listen, I'm not saying it's true,
but I'm just saying that it would be,
look at all the benefits that have happened to rivers
and lakes and oceans.
The ozone closed up.
Right? So I'm just saying we should have a week, like there should be a week all over the world
where it, we just shut down.
You can't go outside.
You have to stay inside for a week every single year.
It would do wonders for people.
It does wonders for the world.
It does wonders for people like us.
But it also, there are a lot of sick people out there
that having to stand with their wives and kids,
child abuse and domestic violence went up a lot
since this has happened.
Yeah.
Oh, of course, of course.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
that's why I said a week.
Then it's like you gotta send these people home
and go to school and go to work.
I mean, the divorce rate is,
the divorce rate is skyrocketing,
the divorce rate is skyrocketing.
If you slap your wife in a week, you just didn't like your wife.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But a lot of people are, they're, they're, they're,
they're divorcing, you know, they're, you know, like,
I know in like, they talk, they said that,
I saw that stat in China, like the divorce rate is up four times the amount, they're, you know, like, I know in like, they talk, they said that I saw that stat in China like the divorce rate is up
Four times the amount because after during the quarantine and I get that you're either in one or two states of your
Relationship you're either like wow, this is the person. I really truly know I love this person because of how we are
Interactoring doing this quarantine or you're like I'm gonna kill this motherfucker, you know
Well, I can't be around this person, or you're like, I'm gonna kill this motherfucker, you know?
I can't be around this person.
But no, what happened I think though,
and look, it happens with me too,
is that you have, we've always been able to leave Thursday
and come back Sunday, or you know, I'll come back Monday,
and you build up this guilt and you actually miss them.
So when you come back, it's like,
let me devour them, let me get them.
And by the time you have to leave again,
you're ready to go.
It's like, I go on vacation for 10 days.
I tell my wife 10 days.
Because if we go for eight, it's fine.
But I wanna stay more.
If I stay 10, I wanna go home.
I'm ready to go.
I wanna stay on vacation until I'm ready.
I wanna go back to my life.
You know what I mean?
And-
But just working on vacation, that's the thing too though.
There's no way to treat-
Yeah, but being at home like a vacation.
So-
But being around people that you're used to a certain thing,
like I'm going away, you're going to school.
Like all right, my kids stays home from school
two days a week, okay?
He would go to school Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. We had from eight o'clock until three
o'clock to do our shit, to go back and take a nap, clean the house, go in the backyard,
smoke a cigarette, a talk to each other. Now, we don't, that time was eliminated.
Yeah, yeah.
And when we, now he goes two days a week,
Thursday and Friday, it's like, oh, thank you, God.
We need that.
I love my kid.
I love him, but you need that time.
You don't have to justify wanting to be away from your kid.
We get it.
Oh, yeah. Everybody knows. I love you. I love you. wanting to be away from your kid. We get it.
I love, I love me around.
I love, I look at, I feel the same way as you. I've gotten closer to my family.
I've actually enjoyed the one benefit of this whole thing is that I've realized
that I love my life.
I always searching for, I was told I was supposed to be over there. I got to get to that.
Well, hey, you know, what what are you going to get there? And I'm like, I'm already there. Yeah,
I'm. Yeah. You're happy with what you have because our life our life became trying to maintain
and search for more as opposed to we didn't take enough time to just enjoy these moments
that we have.
And that's where I'm at, too.
It's like, I really love my fiance.
And I'm looking forward to what the future's gonna bring.
And I didn't think I was gonna be like that.
And I needed to be forced to just enjoy this.
Right.
Yeah.
I actually, the one great thing is that I came out of this content. I was like,
well, I'm fucking. I'm content. Yeah. I'm content. And I don't desire. And I look at when this happened,
I say it all the time, I don't want to repeat myself, but it was probably going to be the best year of my comedy ever
stand-up comedy like I
Literally, I didn't have to worry about it and in one day was all taken away and
That hit me hard and I didn't react right. I was a little I was really fucked up
But then all of a sudden a month in I realized I'm fine. I'm all right. I'm good
I'm thin, I realized I'm fine. I'm all right, I'm good.
I thought the same way to do.
What's the worst that's gonna happen?
I'm gonna get a move somewhere, get a smaller house,
have to, whatever, go to an apartment again.
I still got my wife and kid, we're happiest shit,
and I still can do stand up comedy
when this shit comes back.
Yeah, I felt the same way.
I've always been a frugal guy.
So all the, I've done numerous TV shows and that kind of stuff.
And I realized I've always been someone that saved money.
I always thought about, I don't know what the future is going to bring.
So then this kind of thing happens.
I turn around and I go, oh, I got plenty of money in the bank.
I don't necessarily, I'm not rich or anything, but I always make sure to take care of.
So now, these little jobs that I do and the little things that I've come up and then I, you know, I can pivot into something else, I can take chances and take risks.
And I was like, oh, you know what? I am, I'm going to be okay. I've made myself, I've set myself up to succeed. So, you know, and then you enjoy life.
Enjoy life. I only I had very little money in the bank. I'm dying right now in a vine. I have nothing and
So I'm glad about proud of glad for you, but I am happy
Please what are you talking about with those glasses?
Those go to the Dan Zenni optical special. I know you got the good stuff
I I know I didn't I didn't have a ton of cash when this I would have
this year would have been the year where I would have been like sockets and shit
away. But when you got a kid it's different. So I was like single guy for all
through me doing what I'm doing. So you know it was just the my expense was like I
got clipper tickets and the rest of the money went into bank. You know what I mean? So it's like so I get it when you have a kid you go to school you go you know, it was just, the my expense was like, I got clipper tickets and the rest of the money went into bank.
You know what I mean?
So it's like, so I get it. When you have a kid, they go into school, you know, you know, I don't
know if your wife works.
I don't know if she's one of those that I'm not going to work.
You know, I want to be a stay-in-home mom.
Whatever your, my wife is and that's the voice she used.
Yeah.
That, but I get that, you know what I'm saying?
I actually loved it by wife did that.
When my wife, when we had the kid, I go, what are you going to do?
She goes, I go, whatever you want, I'm behind. She goes, I'm staying home. I'm gonna be a stay I'm gonna be a stay at home
I was like fine great and it made me step my game up made me go from here to here
I was like I need to be here now if we're gonna live this life
I need to go here and I stepped everything up. I believe that I believe when you put yourself in a position
everything up. I believe that. I believe when you put yourself in a position where you have to, you will. At least for me, you know, at least for me. You know, at the SEC just said that the
only Bobby saved up bush crafting skills. You know what? Fat J.C. Go fuck yourself.
If I do have to get rid of my house and live in the woods. I'll know how to make a fucking. You know, that picture of that guy
is exactly what I thought he would look like.
Oh.
Oh.
It's so close.
You call yourself fat JC.
That is the picture of a fat JC.
He really is a fucking ass.
He's my nemesis here.
His dimple was so big, you could eat cereal out of that thing.
You know what I mean, that's great.
I'm glad you're staying in LA.
I'm glad that you have that you're you fucking you have that perspective
because I was born and raised here, man, this is my home.
I'm not leaving my home.
You know, yes, the taxes are too high and all that kind of stuff.
But like where I live, I like I can't even move right now because like I live in like a townhouse.
I pay I'm renting and so if I move now my rent would like go up whatever.
So I'm like, I'm good at this level, you know, because people is like, I have to buy a house, buy a house,
but what people don't realize, let's say your house mortgage is 3000.
All right.
So you got the taxes and you have to pay for your water your lights your the trash
You have to pay for all these things you that's you're doubling whatever your mortgage is
It's like you're you're almost doubling it to live in that place. Well then just go live in a nice, you know
Living go live in a nice building where they take care of all that shit for you
It's all perspective. Yeah, I mean dude owning a house is the smartest ever did. Greg Fitzsimmons told me that years ago
He goes the first money I got I bought a I bought an apartment in New York City
So I could own it and the first money I got tourgasm money
Not from tourgasm from the tour after
Because I didn't get paid anything for tourism
I know HBO make a date on the phone.
In fear of nine weeks, right after sopranos during the fucking primal sopranos,
not I didn't get paid a fucking even sag minimum.
Anyways, paid for my own operation through my own insurance.
Listen, I, uh,
I think you hurt yourself the durian ad filming.
Never did it never insurance.
So I had to pay for it myself.
Anyways, I, uh,
you, you haven't been the same since, but go on.
Yeah, no, every time it rains, my fucking knee hurts and my nose.
But, uh, yeah, yeah, but we're good.
Anyways, I bought my apartment in New York on 47th Street.
Best thing I ever did because and then when I sold it to buy this house,
when I had the kid, there's something about owning your house
I agree with you though
I I bought in an area where the taxes were lower than you know in Westchester and I bought a house
Underneath my means instead I was looking at the house with the swimming pool and the theater room and all the shit
And I was like, we'll get that house. And then I did the numbers. I always do the numbers. I was like, okay,
what if my career dies? I'm fucked. I mean, I buy the house where my career, like three years before
house. And that's what I did with this one. And I'm just never- It's never right. It's was like traveling so much and everything like that.
I just never, it's just like, you know,
I'd rather have, I'd rather have my money being invested
in the market and that kind of stuff than to be,
you know, when people say on real estate,
it's when you, it's like, it's a second property
that you make for profit.
Not the one that you're living in,
cause I can California, you say you buy a house, right? And you're like, Oh, buy house by house. 10 years
later, it's worth this. Okay, but where are you going to live when you sell it? Because
wherever you the money you make, you have to put it into the new house, which is also
three or four times more than you know, you know, are you really making? Then when you
had to fix the roof and then...
I'll tell you, you know what's,
you know what's a fucking profitable thing right now?
And I've been looking into it for a long time
is people are buying land in LA, land,
which is cheaper and putting these little tiny homes
on them and then air being being the air being being them.
As air being...
Yeah, but the rules are changing and certain
certain neighborhoods and areas you're you're not allowed to to do that
anymore what air being be yeah there's certain there they're they're
they're returning to crack down on certain areas that that could be done and
and how it can be done it's like I guess if you own like if I own like an
up like a duplex or something,
I wouldn't wanna have anyone live in it.
Just the whole thing be a Airbnb.
I mean, that's the thing to do.
But it likes the sun neighborhoods,
the sun neighborhoods are cracking down
because they don't like the constant traffic
of different people coming in and out.
Yeah, well, fuck them.
And here's the thing, I just watched this video
on this guy who has a couple places in California
one in LA and one outside of LA and
People are people want that more than a hotel now. They want to go in
They want and even with the COVID they don't give a fuck. They want to be in a little tiny home
With nobody above them next to him on the side of them. It's better. You go in a hotel
with nobody above them next to him on the side of them. It's better.
You go in a hotel, you have to trust that the maid
cleaned off the remote and that they took that pillowcase off.
Yeah.
You know, but I'm looking into,
I'm looking into getting some land
and getting some Airbnb's, getting some tiny homes.
Rent that fucker out.
I know, I get it. I mean, I I just like I wish for my parents, they have a place.
That's like a, you know, they bought they bought this like townhouse condo, you know,
within there's like four of them, they have one and where it's located.
I wish when they moved, because they moved to Spain for a few years, now they're in a retirement
place, but they still own that. I look back on it and I was like, I should have said, let me take this over
and just run an Airbnb out of that.
You know, and I'll send you,
what do you guys want per month,
like whatever you're gonna rent?
I'll send you that and I'll keep the rest, you know what I mean?
Cause it would have been like so profitable.
Like where are it, you know, people getting,
you know, 250 a night for a place that,
you know, you could bring the whole family
and be in a place. I mean, it's like, especially at the height of it.
So it's crazy.
Yeah, it's crazy right now.
It's fucking nuts.
But that's good.
The extent of I'm glad you're standing out like I hope the business comes back
and I hope you're the only one the only comic left.
Yeah.
And you rule the comedy store.
Now the comedy store was on fire.
The the
laugh factory, right? And the comedy store was that the
comedy store was at a place that was like with the comedy
cell. Legendary status. I mean, it's just the the
comedy store was at a level that I can't even explain. And I'm
gonna look back on that time and be like, oh, I'm so glad I was a
part of that. I was in the heart of the lineup every night, you know,
but it'll never be the same, not in my lifetime.
Not when I'm still doing comedy,
when I'm still relevant,
Comestor will not be back to that.
None of these places will,
you know, not till New York's different
because it's so compact and everybody's right there
and all these people live there.
I don't know, dude.
I mean, like, because I was taking the other day,
I'm so grateful that I was in that era
of the comedy seller where it was,
I mean, Jesus, they had three clubs
in a block and a half radius.
They had nine shows a night.
I mean, there was so much creativity going on
in the last 10, 15 years at the comedy seller in New York.
And I was a part of it.
I was in the midst of it.
I was always there.
And now that that's over, it kind of breaks my heart.
I know.
That's what I feel about the Comedy Store too.
They got this documentary on Showtime right now.
And I don't want to watch it because it feels like a funeral to me,
you know?
Right.
It feels like a wake that you're talking about.
You know, so then now with everybody moving It feels like a funeral to me, you know? Right. It feels like a wake that you're talking about, you know?
So then now with everybody moving and then all the like, you know, all the stuff and then, you know, in news and it's just, you know, it's like, I don't know what I don't know what and then when the comedy store finally comes back, it's just gonna be a lot of like casted line-ups
It's not gonna be about who's funny. They're gonna be like, let's make sure we have six female comics and two Mexicans, one black and a thing.
So we can like, you know, it's like, it's gonna be, it's gonna go, it's gonna, it's gonna, yeah, and a thing,
or whatever, like the Hosh Posh races, let's make sure we're, let's make sure that we're, you know, we don't care about funny,
we want to make sure that everybody feels good, you know, it's gonna be,
it's gonna be,
for sure, man. You think that sounds, go back to the conspiracy theory.
It makes it sound like a slate cleaning.
Like just fucking clean the fucking table off and start over in every aspect.
I mean, I feel like that's exactly what happened though.
It's like a hard reset, you know?
It's like that scene, you know what it is?
It's like Jurassic Park, you know what I mean?
We had to turn it off and on and they somebody left the velociraptor cage is
open and we have to reset the whole park again. But it's like, whoa, you can't just reset, you know,
the T-Rex is going to get out and the, you know, so that's what's kind of happening right now. People
are like, you know, it's, it's, you know, I, I'm probably on the, probably on the glass half empty spectrum of this right now.
And I'll probably rotate forward when things eventually start to start up again.
But I don't think it's going to be a good restart.
I think it's going to be a lot of like, who are we?
What are we?
Let's look back and be like, do we want to do it the same way we did it before?
And it's like, you know, here we are. you know, it's like, well, you're right.
They're doing that movies. They're doing, they already said the movies from now on,
you cannot make a movie that will be eligible for an Oscar or an award unless we say, we deem that it's
racially equal. Don't even get me started right now.
I mean, at least it's actually more intense than that.
You know, so like, so there's room for wiggle room
because when I first read that I was like,
Eric, I'm sorry.
Do you have a don't get you started button on your?
I should.
He's been holding that one in for like a week,
you know, for the last 30 minutes, you know what I mean?
Will you just sit back and be the producer, motherfucker?
Hahaha.
Hahaha.
Watch out.
You know what?
You know what?
That was like a bad, that was like a bad heckle in a comedy club, you know?
Hahaha.
No, but the, um, you know, you lost my train of thought.
What were we talking about?
No, no, no, it's not our not our fault if you fucking lose your train.
Oh, look at you, Kudal, ganging up on me now, Mr.
I'm not ganging up on you.
Oh, okay, for now.
You know what, here we go.
Here we go. This is it. I got to put it on now.
This is a nightmare.
I didn't see it.
And he's the one who said something.
You're talking about movies having to, uh,
all the Oscars thing.
Like, so when I first read that I was so outraged by this because this is like what the one who said something. You're talking about movies having to, oh, the Oscars thing.
So when I first read that, I was so outraged by this
because this is like what the people try to do.
They try to make themselves feel better
by coming up with something.
Like you can't legislate how people feel
about other people.
You can't legislate, like you can't be racist.
I can't be, there's a law that you can't be racist.
You can't legislate how people feel
and what they're you know
You know so like so now with this law can a movie like 1917 be made?
This is you know, it's like no, we can't make this movie because it's all white people
Yes, because at the time they made this movie it was all white people, okay?
So what are you supposed to do but now but I realize you look at it further
They're talking not they're not just talking about on screen. They're talking about off screen.
And I can get I can be on board with that.
But what do you mean?
Are you mean just in general?
Yeah, they're not just talking about like, they're not just talking about you.
You have to have no, no, they're saying that you back to make sure that it's not just on screen.
It's the four categories.
And one of the categories is you have to make sure that, hey, the key grip,
that person can be black or latino or you get out of it if you want an all white movie
is just to make the crew black yeah all right that that that is exactly it but
the whole thing is going to be late every day but here's oh here we go
I'm kidding I'm kidding
here we go. I'm kidding.
I'm kidding.
Catered by a polio loco too.
You wanna keep going with it?
Cause like for me, you watch a movie.
Like any, see, I get tired of the white guilt movies
that have to come out every single year.
They have to have the white guilt movie, you know,
it's like, so whatever slave movie comes out, that's to remind you,
mother fuckers, what you did, you know, and it's um, you know,
but now you go, all right, so, but if any, here's a problem,
any period piece, say any movie that's based before say 1975,
if it doesn't have racism involved in it, it's not real. So then you
get to the point where you just want, let's just make science fiction movies. These are the
only stories that we know how to tell. It's like, how are you going to have a mood like this?
So then another way to get out of things too is you go hey if you're a white producer and you just want to make white movies
You go all right. Well, let's make a you know
Civil War movie or or let's make a you know, this is a on a farm in like London and
You know 1857
You know
Yeah, we don't have to move we don't have to worry about you know other other things because we can do this
I mean, there's just so many different so that, I get the sentiment of what they're trying to do.
I get the sentiment of inclusion and less involved
everyone.
And it is important.
I'm not taking that away.
I mean, this is an I'm a person of color.
So when I hear, say, for instance, white female comics,
when they're starting to raise up a talk,
should I go, yeah, yeah, yeah, go, you need to slow it down.
You can't don't take don't lump me in. I can't stand the lumping in of all com. I mail that this term mail comedians and
You weren't helping me
You weren't helping you you were propping up the white comic that you know the whole time
So you weren't on my side. You weren't trying to,
I had to bust my ass to get here. So don't lump me in with male comedians. Like I,
I get when they take a stand that wipe over everybody. It's like we, you told us we can't do that
years ago. And now that's all it is male comedians. And it's so fucked up because there's a lot,
I mean, that gap that used to exist
doesn't really exist anymore.
Every show I'm on, there's a lot of female comics on it.
Every show on TV has female comics on it.
You know what I mean?
You look at anything Comedy Central does.
I guarantee it's half females.
Well, they're casting though.
That's what I do.
But see, even at a club,
there'll be an Asian, there'll be like,
they wanna make sure they are inclusive.
When you go to the Comedy Cell,
there's a ton of female comedians there.
You go to the stand, there's more female comedians.
You know, that's why I love Nome,
the owner of the Comedy Cell, he got into this shit.
They were trying to cast him as a racist and a misogynist
and you don't have enough women,
you don't have enough women of color or people of color.
And one of the girls was like, you know,
I work here and you don't.
He goes, well, you work here, would you rather work here
because you're funny,
because you're a woman and you're black.
And she said, because I'm funny,
that's why you work here.
I don't care about your vagina
or that your skin color.
I only care that you're funny.
Yes, but then that, just to be devil's advocate
with that though, is like, this has not become about
who's funny and who's not.
And whatever, it's about people getting the opportunity
to show that they're funny or not.
And that's really what the issue has become.
Oh no, he gives the opportunity to anybody
and she got the opportunity and she's funny.
So I respect that that he only,
for the most part, books people or passes people
at that club because you had your five minutes and you did it.
You were funny.
Where other clubs don't do that, other clubs don't do that.
And you said yourself, when we come back,
it's gonna be a different ball game.
And look, it's gonna be different.
I think it's gonna be different.
I think there's gonna be a lot of unfunny stuff going on
for a while in the attempt to try to make people feel good.
And then we're gonna have another swingback where it's like talent will rise to the top.
And that will be whoever it is, you know, thanks for tuning in.
Make sure you go check him out on his gaming channel. What is that button again?
Error, nothing game it.
And that's on and that's actually on Twitch and YouTube. I also like I'll be streaming in a little while on YouTube
air-gryff and gaming and I'm in a you see you can check that out because you know
I premiere my my podcast today and then like I go on I then I game on my other channel
So it's riffing with Griffin, which is air-gryff and comedy on YouTube and then you know
Just a fucking Larry guy.
And one of my favorite, I mean, seriously, man,
I'm the LA guys that have always met.
You've always been nice to me,
but you've always been fucking funny, hilarious.
Thank you very much.
And you're a down to earth guy.
And I just really, I love talking.
Here's my shitty podcast with no calendar dates.
I think I'm not really getting any comedy.
Go to the sketch.
Is that his dates right there?
The schedule?
Yeah, there's no dates, because I have no dates.
I'm not doing any comedy on the road
because I just, I'm in LA.
It's hard.
You know, it's not worth, when you're on the East Coast
or in your middle America, say you're in Chicago
or something, it's a lot easier to be like,
or let me hop on this flight to Florida for $125
and get less money from a place.
For me, it's like I ain't flying across the country
for half the money that I was getting before
when I could just stay at home and gain, you know?
Yeah, but you know what?
I do do that for some clubs that I love
because they need us to help them right now.
You know what I mean?
I mean, there's a couple clubs that are like, you, I don't want to see certain clubs die. So I've
actually gone in at what I would go in for a couple days, I'll go in on the Thursday
and let them make that money if they can. So they can stay afloat. But I've turned down
a lot of clubs too that I'm like, no, fuck you, I'm not, it's not worth it.
Yeah.
Well, for me, it's like, I'm not, I don't know what relationships I have with certain clubs
anyway, because like they weren't trying to help me when I needed work, you know what I
mean?
I love you.
I love you.
You have the vendettas of an Italian.
Yeah, dude.
I'm just saying like they were, I'm just talking about, it's like, come on.
Like they were like, help us out.
Yeah.
Oh, you want me to help you out, but you were like not counting the room properly.
You didn't know you want me to help you out.
You want me out, but you know, you're not paying
this feature enough money and now all of a sudden,
hey, help us.
It's like, no, it's like these club owners,
they pull up in their Mercedes-Benz,
they're, we're not making any money, man.
Oh, no, money is happening this week.
Then they're talking to them and they get so comfortable and they're like yeah
I'm fixing the roof on my house and we're going on vacation. You ain't making no money remember you not making money
So all of a sudden now you're making all this money
Yeah, I was at size players years ago when I first started going there and
Tampa don't even get started about that guy rest his soul, you know, he's really still alive.
What thought he died?
Oh, you know, you know, I'm thinking of, I'm thinking of the Kansas city guy because they're
the same guy.
Yeah.
And I exactly, but Bobby, I grew up walking up and he said, yeah, we're not selling tickets,
money's tight.
And then I just went, is that the new convertible Mercedes?
He's like, yeah, I want to take a ride.
I was like, he is a nut bag.
Okay.
That dude would put like, he wants you to stay in his little shit condo, you know?
Yeah, I don't do that.
Yeah, I was like, I refuse.
And then it was his whole thing.
Billy Gardell had to call him and be like, put Eric in the hotel.
Yeah, yeah.
Dude, and then the hotel was shit and the hotel was shit. You know, well,
hang on stop because my moush is going there with me next week and he's staying in the
condo. Push it's not bad. I'm just, I'm bringing you, I'm bringing you, bring some
Chlorox wipes. It's all I'm saying. My buddy, that's toxic people. Good. All right, guys,
it's good to see you guys. And maybe me and you will battle it out in a couple of my,
uh, fuck I will.
Yeah.
All right, buddy.
I also have this for people too.
Be right back.
Thanks for watching.
That's when I got to go to the bathroom.
When I have to take my pepsidacy, I go.
All right, man, you guys are great. Talk to you guys soon, all right? when I have to take my pep to the AC I go.
All right, man. You guys are great.
Talk to you guys soon.
All right.
Thank you.
Thank you.
No problem.
That was fun, man.
He's great.
That was awesome.
We still have the names to read.
Let's read the names, baby.
Here we go.
Now, first of all, I want to thank
everybody on Patreon. I want to thank everybody on Patreon.
I want to thank all the ladybugs that are watching YQWD.
Now that's disgusting.
I want to thank everybody that came out to the show Chris and J.C.
What a show sat it in night.
It was good to be back on stage
and it was great to watch a master Ron Bennington just go up
and do his thing.
And of course, Rich Voss and Jim Foyntine stopped by
and we hung out at the end and we trashed each other
and had a fucking great time.
So it was great.
Everybody that came out to Lakewood Blue Cloth Stadium.
Thanks so much.
And make sure you go to sidesputters.com.
We are gonna be there Wednesday night doing a live
call through in Kelly.
Motion Joe Russell will be there.
And Austin will be the donut to rep me.
And we'll be there on Wednesday night,
unless it's important and I'm fucking up.
And we're gonna have a blast.
Go ahead, what are you gonna say?
No, it's what I'm actually giving the, we're gonna have a blast. Go ahead, what are you gonna say? No, it's what I make sure you're given the,
because it comes out on Sunday, so yeah.
So you're correct, that's why I didn't keep going.
I was.
All right, so make sure you buy your ticket
sites, but it dot com.
I have another date going up today.
So check my website, robbercalilive.com,
for any dates I do have.
They'll be up there.
And as I cancel some of them,
I apologize if they're up there,
but they will.
Some of them will be getting canceled.
And what else, mush?
Oh, I'll make sure you follow us
at like it, be a dude podcast,
if you're not on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.
And make sure you're liking, subscribing,
doing all of that stuff, commenting, not just what you like. And there's no what you you're liking, subscribing, doing all of that stuff,
commenting, notice what you like.
There's no what you don't like.
You've been doing a lot of that.
But even more of what you like lately,
do we love that too.
I thought they'd show that with what they don't like.
I don't mean there's some people who are always
going to say what they don't like.
But you know what, as long as you're letting us know,
it's fine.
Can we get rid of them?
No, they're not being rude.
They're just being honest. They're not
Don't like the shows have been great the last four or five weeks. Some people don't like certain on air talent
Oh Gabby, but they hate Gabby. All right, some people do, but just know there's been a lot of people defending her too
So just know that I keep Gabby because it makes you mad
So there's been a lot of people defending her too. So just know that I keep Gabby because it makes you mad.
I love to go.
So, but yeah, I don't also.
Yes, patreon.com, sash, Robert Kelly.
You guys who are a member of this, if you like the podcast, if you want, look,
it, we get thousands of views every week.
We get 19,000 subscribers and more.
Please go to patreon.com, sash become a member $5 $10 $25
dollars you pick whatever you want you get a ton of stuff culture and Kelly's up there only
Friday episode and you get to come to the jerk off party where you get to hang out with us
on Saturday night in a zoom meeting only podcasted to hang out with its fans, live every Saturday night.
And also you get the extra 10 on YKWD and you get live YKWD, culture and Kelly, every
single day unedited, right to you.
So that is it for a price of a cup of coffee.
Go to patreon.com, slash Robert Kelly and become a member and become part of my community and here we go
And I will also read your name off. Dang it. Oh, no, I see a lot of tens
Game clear
$10 oh
That didn't work 10 dollars.
10 dollars.
10 dollars.
And then Amanda Elliott.
Thank you for being a member. Bow. Uh, $5, right?
And then we got Christian Call of Love,
cough, cough.
Christian Call of Love.
Bow, bow, bow, bow,
bow, mat,
clifton, heresiorits,
Kellyn Park
POP out out out out $10 you get fireworks. You got patty
Oh patty patty one two three four five six seven eight nine ten you get Fernando head to the logo
Thank you for being a member. Yes
Thank you for being a member. Yes. Whoa.
Ten of those.
John five bucks.
Thank you very much.
Turner.
Skull, lup, skull, lup, skull, lup.
You get that. Ten of those.
Joseph Borges.
Matthew Brunger.
Is that Matt Brunger? The one we know? No, it's Matt Brunger. Oh, nice
talking. What's up, Matt? And Jason Frank, I want to thank you guys from the bottom of
my heart for being a part of this patreon.com. This is what I'm doing during the pandemic.
I'm in here doing shows for you guys every single day almost. And I think you like it.
I think you like it.
It's a fun show.
It's not too heady.
It's not too crazy.
We talk about serious stuff,
but we're really here to have a laugh.
Oh, that was fucking a good show.
Eric was so fun.
Eric's amazing.
You did a lot of fun.
I really like it.
I've always liked him.
And he's so honest.
And I mean, Jesus Christ makes me laugh
Asking us out for that for years. What do we got over? Let's talk to the limelissa love you to Greg Sheppard soon to be on Twitch
You're fucking Bobby get on twitch your cock sucker and fucking play the games
I'll be on there fat JC
He's
Borges
You motherfucker What if Patty is a boy? I don't know. What are you gonna do?
Of course we have stood on awesome show guys. Thank you so much and
Chris Lou Greg Chris Lou Greg Sarah all you fucks in there
Thank you. We'll see you guys tomorrow. culture and Kelly, new episode. You know what,
Dad? See you next week.
Shitty dodge, sheep, sheep dodge.