Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Jeremiah Watkins | Bellbottom Sleeves

Episode Date: October 26, 2020

We've got Jeremiah Watkins is on, and not only does he hit us with some sexy sax, but we also get into the resurgence of the Comedy Store, his time with Kill Tony and how he joined The Wave! Learn mor...e about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey baby, we're starting the podcast right now! We're back, you know what to do live. Welcome everybody to the show. YKW We are starting the social media podcast. We are starting the podcast. YKW We are starting the podcast.
Starting point is 00:00:14 YKW We are starting the podcast. We are starting the podcast. We are starting the podcast. We are starting the podcast. We are starting the podcast. We are starting the podcast. We are starting the podcast.
Starting point is 00:00:22 We are starting the podcast. We are starting the podcast right now. We are starting the podcast right now. We are starting the podcast right now. We are starting the podcast right now. We are starting the podcast right now. We are starting the podcast right now. Why can't I use it? This podcast is so fun and crazy and has a rules. She'll help you on winning this! First of all, I'm gonna have a first-sorry It's a comedy podcast. This is an NPR. That's the podcast done. Is there any better show?
Starting point is 00:00:34 This is the original storyline. It was fun! What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck?
Starting point is 00:00:54 What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? And now we're emmeling to fucking TikTok and YouTube and Instagram and fucking Austin, Texas and fucking What's up everybody welcome back to another episode of you know what dude fucking shows have been slamming Last week the week before and now this week we have a a guest that I've I've I've liked from afar. I've admired far. Um, excited about who is the guest?
Starting point is 00:01:28 Get him. I'll walk in. What's up? What up guys? How you doing? Hi, buddy. I like that Mike layout right there. Like a nice cock right in front of you. Oh, dude. That's what I like, dude. Just right in front of me. Feel free for your fans of Photoshop whatever they want I Doing that cuz they will Photoshop And it's real and we of course we got Gabby the hey here at fucking flamboyant fuck face What the fuck is up and then we got the mush, where's the mush? And there he is right there, the mush.
Starting point is 00:02:12 Hi mush, how are you? I'm all right, how are you guys doing? Oh, that was fake, that's fake happening. Ha! Ha! That was mush! Tell me if I'm lying. Oh, I'm never happy That was like fucking somebody else's pot was someone else's podcast fucking voice. I'm good. How you guys doing?
Starting point is 00:02:38 Hey guys feeling chipper today or what When you have to do the radio show, but now they have to do a podcast average after it's just to get into the pot. Hey, all right, man So we just did three hours. We're gonna do another hour of Podcasting before you go back to your hotel room and sleep. How's it going? So Robert, you're the first episode. So what do you want to talk about? I don't know Kimbo slice is dead What's your family about Phoenix? What's that?
Starting point is 00:03:10 What's your favorite thing about Phoenix? I fucking, I actually love Phoenix. I don't know what's happening right now, but my right nut is aching. That's not. That can't be good. I think it means it's gonna rain, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:24 Gonna rain and seven more weeks of winter. Those are the, right? Um, it's, it's fucking, I gotta adjust hang on. Ugh. Ugh. You know what? Sorry. I was sitting on it.
Starting point is 00:03:36 How do you, are you always sitting on it? Why do you have to readjust? All right, Gabby, I, and I don't think either one do you know I mean you have big big balls I have big balls. I got some Longies. I got some Longies man Well if I sit if I sit wrong then it's like okay. All right. All right Yeah, no you don't have any long lame flaps, you know, just like where you have to like you have to Re-adjust the legs a little bit because a labia is just right underneath the thigh No, it's pretty tough. Dan. It's pretty locked in yeah, but imagine your tits were between your legs
Starting point is 00:04:14 It doesn't work for her either Yeah, I'm sorry, yeah, but imagine if my tits were between my legs. I'm sorry, right, right. Okay, now I get it. Um, yeah, big, I mean, yeah, Jeremiah, you look like you got to not to go down the gutter right out of the gate, you know, I mean, I really would love to get monetized or maybe, you know, get off whatever list I'm on to not be looked at on every fucking social media platform ever. I said one thing, one thing about, no I'm kidding. And you look like you have a big sack. Yeah, I do.
Starting point is 00:04:51 Yeah. Yeah, I can, you know, if I tuck back, you see a lot of ball, you know, it looks like some kind of animal that's on all fours looking back at you. It's a whole thing, it's a whole product. I have a big, I have a big, you know, girls, you don't know this gap, they get small.
Starting point is 00:05:10 Like, if certain times they, they tuck up and get the sack itself has resiliency and will tuck up and get small. Oh, if you're really cold, like I'm a total grower, not shower. So not impressive at all. If I'm not one of those guys who can just be like, check this out, I have to be like,
Starting point is 00:05:32 let me do some prep work. And then I'll come back to you in like 15 minutes and maybe get a hair dryer or something. It's like one of those guys as far as you dip in water. Yeah, exactly. It's like even when you're with the guys camping, you're like guys, I'll be right back. Yeah, I'm gonna go pee like light years away.
Starting point is 00:05:49 Yeah, we're gonna go skinny dip and we're just jumping real quick hang on one second. I gotta go fluff myself Which is which I think that I'll at least I've done this if if you're planning on being naked or on other guys. You don't want to be the guy that has the really teeny tiny penis. You might fluff, which is that I look back at those memories. I'm like, that's probably some of the gays things I've done is like, okay, I got to get this ready for the guys. I got to, I got to make sure this is a good condition down here before I go out to the locker room before I share power with the other guys. But it's true. I remember I went camping with Aari Shaffir and Aari's dick is always at goofy long goofiness. It's just a goofy thing.
Starting point is 00:06:32 Oh, yeah. It's my penis. It's my balls. I don't see a problem. So I mean, you're the thing in like, is this happening? This is not happening. No, it is happening. I've never heard anybody do good. Yeah, dude. It's so I remember who you know, when you get into your tent, you kind of, you have to change before you go in or when you get out the next day, you're going to change, right? So we all went swimming and stuff and I was gonna I gotta take my swim trunks off because I had them on before we went
Starting point is 00:07:18 Knowing that we're gonna go swimming. I don't want to get naked in front of fucking Ari And then because my I gotta I'm gonna have to fluff. I'm gonna have to go no bush Get it up and then you know have it at least hang, for that second that he might glimpse my pecker, I needed to look at least, I don't need, I don't want him to, no, I just want it to, oh, this is deck. I don't wanna be like, what the fuck is that? You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:07:41 Yeah, you wanna prepare yourself. So I- But realistically, how long is it staying fluffed? Like you fluff for a second and then you walk out and do you have to just focus? It doesn't matter, you just need it at a- It's the first image because no guy is just like keeping focus with it, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:07:58 So it's that first initial, whatever they see in the first five seconds. So you could have fluffed just 10 seconds ago and you walk out and you're like, hey guys, but you need that little bit of time for that peak window. But then after that, it's like, yeah, if it gets smaller, whatever, nobody's going like, hey, it was bigger earlier. What happened?
Starting point is 00:08:17 What happened to you? Yeah, if they saw it at, it's potential. It's half mass potential. They're like, oh, his dick is okay. But if they see you at a mushroom, they're assuming, oh my God, his dick is so small. It's like that all the time, yeah. Yeah, you gotta give him a little,
Starting point is 00:08:35 you gotta give him that shot of what the potential could be. So I remember that I didn't, and Ari, I just turned around, I turned away from Ari, because I'm like, he won't see me. I'll just turn away. And then he walked over to me. It's like he was looking to see what my dick looked like. Oh, guys who are really comfortable with their package,
Starting point is 00:08:58 they look for it. They're like, all right, well, what's this guy looking at? People who are not comfortable, they're one of the ones who are trying to not make eye contact at the urinal or everything. It's like, the dudes with the huge dicks who are like, so how's it going over there? What's that?
Starting point is 00:09:12 Yeah. Yeah. Sure dude, guys with big dicks have big dick confidence. They do. And they want to see other dicks. Because it builds up their ego even more. That's why they look at it. It's like capturing souls.
Starting point is 00:09:27 Every time they look at little Dicks around them, it just makes their Dicks bigger and bigger. Every little DICK that they see, it just builds up on it. They look forever. What if looking at Dicks made you dick bigger? That's how their Dicks became bigger. You know what I mean? Like, you know what I mean, Dicks, I would look at, I would fucking, I'd just hang out in a truck stop on 87 going north. And I would just be looking at clocks.
Starting point is 00:09:50 But it's true though, if you have a regular dick and now I don't have a little dick, I just have a little dick when it's not presentable when it's like right now, that's right now. That's right. It's just terrible. If, if right now somebody was a witch and Ting, and I was naked and everybody can see my, I would have a nickname. Yeah, yeah, if it did a jump cut to us naked
Starting point is 00:10:15 in the chairs right now, I would be embarrassed because I can feel what I'm working with right now. And it's in comedy mode. It also is small whenever I'm on stage. It's not like a hanger and a flop small whenever I'm on stage. It's not like a hangar and a flopper when I'm, you know, being physical and stuff. It's like, it's ready to, to, to hibernate and, and, and stay. Pull it where it's at. I would love that. Imagine having us a hanger and you can just wear, you can just wear
Starting point is 00:10:37 some nice jeans and then put your leg up in the monitor while you're in the middle of the belt. Yeah, I mean, yeah, it just looked like Robert Plant on that fucking Zeppelin movie. Yeah. His fucking package was all on one side, everything. And that's all you could look at. It's like the greatest band ever.
Starting point is 00:10:56 The greatest drummer of all times. And all you could look at was Plant's package. Yeah, I would love that. Yeah, I've been like, you've ever been fitted for like a tuxedo or a suit or something and then they ask you the tailor's like, which side do you want? And I'm like, do I have to choose a side?
Starting point is 00:11:12 Can I just, can I go middle? What if I'm cold when the ceremony's going on? I go, my headphones in, I'm echoing a little bit. Yeah, dude, fittings are the, I mean, look, you're a skinny guy right? Yeah. But fittings for me are a fucking nightmare because I've never been the same size, you know what I mean? Right.
Starting point is 00:11:36 I'm always going in. I'm always waiting and stuff, yeah. I'm always fluctuating, let me put these in the wrong ear, you're custom headphones, I'm sticking it in the wrong ear. Fuck it idiot, I'm trying to jam it in my right ear. It's the left ear. Yeah. Fitting, like people don't know, the first thing you do when you book, when you book, one of these gigs, right, is you got to go for the fitting. Yeah. And it's a nightmare for me. It's a nightmare. Because I know that they're not gonna have They're not gonna some young girls not gonna go to fucking The gap and just find an outfit that's gonna fit this shitty body, you know name name like they're gonna try
Starting point is 00:12:17 I always go there's a rack of shit and I'm just like yep I got to the point where now I tell them where I shop, what jeans, what t-shirts, and what shirts to get me. And I tell them to get triple X, I'm a double X, but get a triple X, get the tall t-shirt because if I have to do this at all, my stomach's popping out, you're going to have to edit everything I say. Well, nobody takes you seriously. You, you could be as passionate or whatever. You could be going on that amazing speed. I thought you were just going to end that right there. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no-drift showing, you can be, it can be the mind-blowing equation
Starting point is 00:13:05 that you just, you could have the vaccine for COVID. And if there's a little bit of mid-drift, there's like, yeah, I'm not, I'm not taking that vaccine. There's no way. Yeah, I'm not, Louis CK was one who told me to get tall t-shirts because I didn't know they made a tall. So it's a double exel, but it's a tall. So when little guys like me raise
Starting point is 00:13:26 up, when I'm on stage, I remember I was on stage in the two hot chicks in the front row and they pointed at my stomach. And I was doing this bit. And I just, I looked down to my gut was hanging out. And I was like, Oh my God. They pointed and giggled and the only the only thing I could do is go Yeah, my stomach just popped out and fucked you up. I know it fucks me up too. I had to acknowledge it Either that a cry like carry at the end of the movie So sad dude internally. I was like, why did food have to be in the diction? Yeah, that's the worst kind of heckle right there is, is women laughing at part of your body,
Starting point is 00:14:12 like without that being the joke, you're like, no, I said something else, it was funny. Don't look at that right now. What are you doing? What is the worst heckle you got? Oh, I've dealt with a lot over the years of of different people because I engage with the audience a lot. I talk to the audience a lot in my act. So every once in a while, you'll get like like blindsided by something. I had one guy. It wasn't so much a heckle, but he nut tapped me in front of the audience
Starting point is 00:14:48 on stage. What? Really? He was sitting in the front row and I was going after this guy because he came in at an 11 and he wasn't in the room even before I got on stage. You know, when you see a comic dealing with it before, you kind of have an idea of like, okay, this guy's drunk or what's going on with this guy? He sat down right when I got on stage and started talking to us right away. He claimed to be a green beret and
Starting point is 00:15:15 He was actually wearing a beret and that's how you know it's not true if you're wearing a beret Yeah, it's too dead on there's no way he was actually a beret But this is what he was claiming. He had sunglasses on and he started heckling me as soon as I got on stage, like 30 seconds into my first joke. And then, you know, I call him a cool blind man and then all this stuff, like back and forth, just dumb stuff.
Starting point is 00:15:38 And I got the best of them because, you know, the comedian has the mic, we have the power. Like if we do it every night of the week, we're gonna beat the person in the audience and he got so embarrassed, he stood up when I was like kinda like, egging it on and you know, I have a bit of a punchable face, I've been told.
Starting point is 00:15:54 Yeah, you look like a mega hat. Yeah, you put me in a mega hat, people are like, yeah, that fits, that works. Yeah, it's a good look. Is he on a boat right now? Like, it should be an Indian guy in front of you with a drum and you just go. This is ours now.
Starting point is 00:16:13 Thank you. Thank you so much. No, we like it more. No, we will have it. I'll take this from here. You guys did good at the beginning. Oh my gosh, you look like if Gabby transitioned. There you are.
Starting point is 00:16:24 Ah, 100%. good at the beginning. Oh my gosh, you look like if Gabby transitioned. There you are. A hundred percent. We do look like weird brother sister com, but like it's just weird like face swap thing that's going on between us. If you have Gabby transitioned and there's nothing wrong with that, I'm saying it's a good night. Good one. I love, look, anybody loves the transgender community. It's me, probably a little too much, if you ask my wife and my Google Serpice. But listen, the thing is, yeah, you guys do look alike. You guys do look a little alike. Gabby, you would have super long balls if you were a man.
Starting point is 00:17:00 Now I got it. Super long balls, now you get it. She can get it. Gabby, Gabby's nuts, I have to, if it goes, if nuts are like dits, she'd have a little tiny transgendered nuts. She'd have a little, but she'd have a long pink penis, like a perfect fucking Aryan cock, like a thin, thin though, thin. It'd be thin with a helmet, like a crazy helmet.
Starting point is 00:17:25 Yeah, that turned red when she came. Like an icicle, just. Yeah. Sharp. Yeah, sharp. Gabby, I want you to paint your dick. What it would look like and bring it next week. I want to see.
Starting point is 00:17:38 Is this therapy? I'm not going to paint my dick next week. Is that what you therapist told you to do? Aren't therapy. Oh, one more thing about Ari's dick, he used to do this at the comedy store when it was really wild there with nudity. Like when, like before it got a little bit more corporate, like when there's a little bit more business and stuff there, he used to do this bit on stage. I don't know if he ever did it in New York with you guys or if he just saved it for the
Starting point is 00:18:02 LA comics, but there's a bit that him and he and David Taylor used to do where They called it I think it was doctor testicles or professor testicles and Ari would take the glasses off of his head and Wrap them around his penis where his penis was the nose and rest them on his big balls Yeah, and David Taylor would interview Professor Testicles. And that was the whole bit. And it was obviously the testicles never answered, but it was just like this guy staying very serious.
Starting point is 00:18:34 Like, now what is your theory on quantum physics? You know, yeah, that's like, you know, his dick has the same hair as his head. You know that, his dick has the same hair as his head. You know that, his dick and balls and his pubes look exactly like Ari. Yeah, it's a copy-paste situation for sure. It's very, I've never seen anything like it. It looks the way, if Ari became a dick and a balls, if he was like, Mr. Lipit, I wish, I wish I was a fish. If he was just going, I wish I wish I was a fish if he was just going I wish I wish I was a
Starting point is 00:19:05 Dicking balls. He would that's what he would turn into his own dick and balls looks exactly like it I mean uncanny. I do not look like my dick and balls Why do you balls my dick and balls look like a chubby Chinese guy? So do you? Oh, I guess I do then I'm You know what I forgot about that Look at your face right now I apologize I apologize Let me ask you question dude
Starting point is 00:19:34 Like what something happened When I was hanging in LA back in the day The store was fucking shit Yep, it was just crazy dead all the time. You know, they never use the big room. It was never really used. Well, it was dark all the time because they could fill it. So it was, you know, how a huge room is to perform.
Starting point is 00:19:57 And if there's only 10 people, you don't, there's no point. There's it's it's it's so hard. The, the laughs are just scattered. Yeah. And they used to use the front room. What is it? Well, let's explain to people what the front room is what? So there's three rooms in the comedy store. There's the original room, which is completely black. They sometimes have the neon signs lit up of different famous comedians names on the back wall. And that's kind of the only light that's in there. But as soon as Showtime hits, that's like for the pre-show. As soon as Showtime hits, it's a black void in the original room. And that's like a rectangular kind of room and it's soundproof. So that's one of
Starting point is 00:20:34 the reasons they say why it's one of the hardest rooms. If not, the hardest room in the country because the laughs just die there. There's no like bouncing off like brick walls and stuff like that and for the momentum. And then the belly room is upstairs. It seats like 70, 80 people. And that's where they used to have like the belly room for exclusively women comics back in the day, like in the 80s and stuff like that, like for them to develop and find their voices. And then the main room seats like. No bitches couldn't do when those wouldn't let those bitches on stage right right they go up to your little your little castle there's work on your little jokes
Starting point is 00:21:10 it's cute it's cute it's called the high heel room back in the day and that's all you hear going up to click click click click the little the broads going up stairs telling their little bits it's a good monologue you should tape that there was a mirror on the side of the wall in there just so they could check their vanity in between their jokes. Yeah. Yeah, and every girl was brought up this next chick is a good comic furor chick. Furor chick. Yeah. And there was only three of them. It's just the named three over and over. Yeah. All right, so upstairs the bellies room
Starting point is 00:21:47 and then the main room. Yeah, so the main room is the room that was mainly dark because it seats like 350 people. It used to be a Seara's nightclub back in the day. So there's a lot of history and ties to the mob at the comedy store from back in the day like where all the big stars in Hollywood used to hang out in that main room and that big room.
Starting point is 00:22:09 And there's, I know, I prefer mainly in the original room. I've done the main room once, I think, and I've done the belly room once. The belly room is awkward, cool little room, but it's a little awkward the way it's set up. Because you have, if you're looking out like there's the main audience is right here, but then there's this upper balcony to your right, so you have to do this a lot. Yeah, it's not just straight ahead.
Starting point is 00:22:37 So it's fun, but it's a little awkward. The original room, it is funny that you say that. I remember performing there when I lived in LA, and I remember it was just something off. It's weird, it's creepy kind of. Yeah, it was just something off a little bit, you know what I mean? And then the main room was actually great. When I did it once, it was fucking great.
Starting point is 00:23:02 Yeah, main room is kind of like a Vegas showroom. Like it's got the big lit up marquee lights on the side, those red neon's, it's the red's blacker stage, and you just feel that room for me, like out of all the rooms, that's where I feel like the most, like, sounds silly, but like, like a comic, like, oh wow, I'm performing to this big crowd right now, like, but I'm also very presentational with what I do on stage, so that room just kind
Starting point is 00:23:31 of caters more for visibility of like what I like to do and stuff like that. Because when I used to go there, you know, the laugh factory was the room. The improv was the fucking place. But I always like the store store. I just I don't know because I like the seller of the Boston Comedy Club. I never liked the champagne rooms. I always liked the the dingy. Let's get it done room. And the store was like that. It the comics that were there were fucking a little off and a little edgy and a little country. And you know what I mean? And kind of confident.
Starting point is 00:24:07 And there wasn't too much, it wasn't so hollywoody. You know what I mean? Like who's there? And it was really nobody there, you know what I mean? So there's no industry. It stayed away from the comedy store. And I like that. I like the free-ness of that.
Starting point is 00:24:24 But I remember the guy running it at the time. I remember Mazda Brani out of all the people I know in this fucking business. This guy was the one who called up Tommy while I was there. I rented an Airbnb for three months because I was supposed to write a screenplay with somebody. Yeah, right. Apparently, a lot of parties somebody. Yeah, right. Apparently a lot of parties he had to go to. But anyways, never wrote the screenplay
Starting point is 00:24:51 and I would go to that club and mage the brownie out of all the people I fucking know. This guy, I love, but we're not, I would talk to each other. We don't, hey, happy birthday type. I mean, I know a lot of people. He called me up and said you should be in this club. I would talk to each other. We don't hey happy birthday type. I mean, you know, I know a lot of people he Called me up and say you should be in this club called the guy. I think his name is Tommy
Starting point is 00:25:10 Tommy Morris was the old town I got there got me this fucking audition. I go in Fucking murder at the original room Mm-hmm come out and then he gave me some we the we one of the weirdest speeches I've ever gotten in my life in comedy. I've gotten two weird speeches, one of the Strip comic strip from Lucien, who was a fucking lunatic too, who told, you know, we have too many white guys here and I was like, yeah, but I do a whole thing about looking Spanish, not white.
Starting point is 00:25:46 We have a lot of Spanish people too. I was like, fuck you, tell me you don't want me. This guy taught me though, went on some journey, and he was thanking me for coming on a journey. And at one point, I was like, dude, what do you get? Let's go. I got to go. I'm already, you, what do you get? Let's go. I gotta go. I'm already, you understand this side, I make my living. I don't give a fuck.
Starting point is 00:26:11 Like I, I mean, I'm, I, I, I get it. Like get on like, like, did, do you want me at this club or do you, or do you not? Because there's other spots that I need to do. Yeah. Whatever. I was just like, get out and he gave me nose. No, man, I'm, I just thanks for that. And I just like, get out and he gave me nose. No, man, I'm just thanks for that. And I was like, this is fucking, it made me so angry
Starting point is 00:26:29 because I was like, this is such horse shit. Yeah, at least Estee just ignores you. Yeah. Yeah. Right. If you don't see her in the doorway, you're done. You know what I mean? She's just upstairs eating fucking and having some tea
Starting point is 00:26:43 and maybe a little hummus talking to fucking Tom Popper and Colin Quinn. He had done. But if she's there, she'll watch and be like, yes, call me with the Vales blah blah. And then you know, this guy gave me some trip that we were going on. Like some artist trip. And along the way where you like, I had to have gotten it, right? And then at the end, he just is like, no, like that's such a weird misdirect for him to take you on.
Starting point is 00:27:09 I don't know, dude, it was a weird thing. And then everybody was like, no, that's just him. And I was like, I can't, I can't. Yeah, that's too much. That's too much. I just don't have, I'm not healthy enough mentally to deal with that. I'm just not.
Starting point is 00:27:23 So I just never went back. And then all of a sudden, I don't know what the fuck happened. I started, you know, you started seeing it, a social media. And social media changed at the same time too. So I didn't know what it was, but all of a sudden the club and then the shows and then there'd be these videos.
Starting point is 00:27:40 And you'd see people, and I'd be like the main room, people are doing, and then you see this room, you're like, that room is fucking beautiful. Like, oh yeah. Oh my God, when that room's filled up, that's like a special, that's like, oh my God. And then all of a sudden you see all this shit, and then I would sat in the last time I went out there,
Starting point is 00:28:00 I was like, this is fucking popping. This is like, like in the movie, when they're showing the club, and everybody, and they're doing the good fella fucking walk. It's like, these guys, and the mat, and then this guy's over here, and there's a fucking Tesla, and then there's a Lamborghini, and someone's, I was weird. It was like a whole 180. What happened?
Starting point is 00:28:23 There was a combination of multiple things that happened. Where? Was it you? Was it you? Was it you? It was me. It was me. I'm the guy.
Starting point is 00:28:33 It was a handful of things. So Tommy was him leaving was, I think, one of the things that lifted a one of the things that lifted a part of the energy that was not right at that place because there's a bunch of really, really amazing comics that have a similar story to you where they're like, I killed, but he didn't pass me. Like it was weird. Like, Hannibal Burris auditioned for him once
Starting point is 00:29:06 and he just looked at him and he goes, I see he used Marvel writer. And then like, he's right around and his, and his booth. He's absolutely right on that. He's way, I would say a writer. But there's like a, there's a bunch of, of stories like that.
Starting point is 00:29:21 But so Adam E. Get took over as town coordinator and he started inviting Some of the names back to the store that were not there for a long time So there were guys like Joe Rogan and Joey Diaz and and different like people from that crew who started coming back and making it cool again and the main thing Out of everything was the social media with podcasting. All the comics who were there it was kind of around the time when podcasts started to pop a little bit and everybody was talking about how fun it was to be the store, how was it favorite club. So anybody who's a podcast
Starting point is 00:29:58 listener is like, oh well I got to go there. So it's this nice like meld of like everything kind of transitioning and coming back. So then, you know, poppins, beget more poppins, and then celebrities start coming back. And there's shows, I think also there's some shows that I was fortunate to be a part of there that kind of helped revive some new air back into the store roast battle being one of them because there's a haven for free speech and like just craziness. And that was one of Rogan's first shows. Back of the store roast battle being one of them because it was a haven for free speech and like just craziness. And that was one of Rogan's first shows back of the store was just coming to be a judge on that show and to check it out. Oh no shit. Yeah. And you were part of you were part of the what what was it? On the way. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I gotta tell you I saw you guys at the first time I saw you in person.
Starting point is 00:30:45 I saw you guys at the first time I saw you in person. I think it all. I was at the stand and you guys did the wave. They brought you there, right? Okay, yeah. And it was my favorite part of the show. I mean, it was so fucking special, right? What you guys would do, because I didn't, I just, I didn't understand
Starting point is 00:31:07 what was happening. I was like, who are these fucking guys? You guys did such outrage, just funny, original shit with that thing. You brought that whole, because I'll be honest with your roast battling. I don't know, whatever, I get it. It's cool. It was a thing. It was the fidget spinner of fucking You know comedy for a couple years, you know And it what every time I did it was very funny and mean and Whatever but I never was into doing it myself. I don't fucking do that shit You know I'm I just right it's hard enough to tell the joke I'm not fucking right in a joke and just throwing it out the window, you know what I'm just right. It's hard enough to tell the joke. I'm not fucking writing a joke and just throwing it out the window. You know what I mean? That's how I am with
Starting point is 00:31:47 I always enjoyed doing the wave, but like I never wanted to personally battle. This is not my fact. The wave thing I thought was probably the best part of the whole show. Who came up with that? It was it was a group of us where so originally it was literally dudes in a corner like a group of dudes in a quarter Just between jokes to heighten things. They just go whoa and it was a very like Kind of like a deaf jam kind of parody at first where if a joke hit really hard to embarrass the comic that was on stage It was a group of guys that come up there and just just kind of dance and like get in the other person's face and stuff like that.
Starting point is 00:32:27 And they asked me to be in it one night after the show had been going on about six months. And I hopped in and we just melded because I, Jamar neighbors and those guys, like I've been friends with a long time, and they're like, hey, we need you to fill in. Do you want to do it? And then I became the white guy and the group.
Starting point is 00:32:45 And it was me, I had evolved into me, Jamar and neighbors and Willie Hunter. And as the show grew, we're like, well, we can't just go like, oh, and just like dance every time. We got to start getting more creative. So that's when we started thinking of little vignettes, little bits, we got props involved.
Starting point is 00:33:02 And that's when we started doing ridiculous stuff with, you know, it, be like an American soldier, I'd play like handcuffed and they would put like a black pillowcase over my head and then slip my throat and then blood would fly out. And like, after a little roast joke would happen. So like, it was so heightened compared to the little joke that was going on where people like what a lot of why do they do that why would Exactly the exact exact emotion. I felt like why the fuck why who are they what the fuck is happening? You know what I mean? I was like I forget what you guys did But it was so outrageous. There was one of them that I was like what the fuck is Like, why would they even think of that?
Starting point is 00:33:46 And it was my favorite part of the show. I appreciate that. Yeah, we're very polarizing. When we did it on TV for Comedy Central, they, I'll still defend us to the end. We were shot in a way that was not conducive to us where it looked like we were interrupting the show and not, you know what I mean? So like the way they would cut it, it would just, it would cut a little bit late and then it would just be us on stage. So then literally the audience at home is like, how did these guys even get on stage?
Starting point is 00:34:22 So the amount of tweets and hate that we've got over the years from that is so funny to us because we would be doing the silliest, dumbest, physical, mime act outs and stuff. And people are like, you're ruining this. You're ruining this form of roasting. What are you doing? We're like, we're just, we're just,
Starting point is 00:34:42 like we're eating calm and stuff like that. It's not that big of a deal It's wrong with that. I'm sorry Gabby. I don't mean to I didn't mean to offend you Eating calm is fine honey. I don't Not always Hey, not always yet. You had to get a fucking debate Always okay. Hey Yes, she's the least interesting woman in the world. It's like, I don't always eat gum, but when I do, it's, well, it's with a napkin and
Starting point is 00:35:09 I wipe it off to the side a little bit. It's a bear thing and I don't like it when I do. And I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it.
Starting point is 00:35:19 I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like drama. I see a therapist about it, but when I do, each come. That voice, I love it. Just saying stuff, you know what I was supposed to say and that voice is the best.
Starting point is 00:35:32 When I do a come, I tell you, it's the best come of all. It's Gabby come. Good, but you, what can I say to you? Yeah, the hate mail, the hate shit. It's, I wish they made phones more delicate so that people would break their phones when they got so angry. So they would, yeah, you have to slowly type your hate instead of just back in you fat fucking piece of shit.
Starting point is 00:35:59 You ruined Tories. I'm fuck off. Get over it. Here's a go. Uh, but here's the thing. didn't know, I heard this, cause of course I don't know, but I'm probably bringing up a beat in a dead horse and bringing up a fucking old issue,
Starting point is 00:36:15 but Rose Battle was two dudes that invented it, correct? Yes. Two dudes invented it, and then the Jeff Ross came in and then one guy didn't want to do it with Jeff. The other guy did. So the other guy who did just went with Jeff and they did it. And the other guy went and did another version of it. Kind of. There's a lot of stuff that we have behind the scenes that of that, that on paper, that's
Starting point is 00:36:48 kind of how it looks. That's kind of how it looks on paper. Oh, so there's, ha, looking new. I'm avoiding. You just got corporate. Wow, I like it. Yeah. You want to go put a suit on real quick?
Starting point is 00:37:00 Yeah, well, I was getting fitted earlier. Yeah, I mean, it's one of those things where it's over. It's not coming back. It's done. He's I know it's not coming back. It's one of the. It's I've I've tried to he took that from two gay comics in the West, he's village bumping mics. What are you guys doing? I like it. I'll do it.
Starting point is 00:37:24 Damn it. Perfect'll deal with Damien Town. Perfect. Perfect. Yeah. I've tried, dude, years later, the other comic involved, I tried to see if he and I were cool. And he, like, I went up to him. I was like, hey, man, what's up?
Starting point is 00:37:39 And he just looked at me and he's like, hey, man, we're not cool. So, like, don't be, don't be like coming up to me like we're cool. And it was at the comedy store, my home club. And I just laughed. I was like, all right man, whatever, like I walked away. Like it's all good. My, my name's on the wall there.
Starting point is 00:37:55 It's, you know, like if you want to act like that and my club, all the, whatever. I'm say Lavi kind of guys like, okay, like this is years later. So that's why I'm a little bit weird about bringing it up because it's one of those things where that's one of the only people that I can really think of that I have like actual beef with where I tried like where I'm like, yo, what's up, I read, you know,
Starting point is 00:38:20 and then it was a complete shut down. What, why is he mad though? Because he didn't want to do it, and you guys went and did it? No, keep talking about it. There, there, dude, there's stuff that is like, the way that certain people like made their deals and stuff that I think it just got a little bit dirty.
Starting point is 00:38:40 And that's really all that I can say about it without like, giving, yeah, probably, I mean, it's just one of those things and that's really all that I can say about it without like giving other people that- Yeah, probably. Yeah, probably. I mean, it's just one of those things where it's like it's water under the pressure. But then he made something?
Starting point is 00:38:52 Oh, he made his money. That was the whole thing is- Oh, he did. He made his money. Yeah. So he still got like producer credits and all that stuff. Yeah. Right.
Starting point is 00:39:04 Isn't it weird how something like that that's so amazing? like producer credits and all that stuff. So it's yeah. Right. Isn't it weird how something like that that's so amazing? You caught lightning in a bottle. And then if fucking you lost a friendship over it. Yeah, I don't know. Well, I don't know how much he ever really liked me. He didn't like the wave. So it was more like the wave.
Starting point is 00:39:21 No. Why? See the guy wrote the email? Probably. It was probably some of the tweets that I got as stuff like that. Right. Yeah, no.
Starting point is 00:39:32 I think he saw it as that we were interrupting the show and that he would be telling me, he's like, hey, Jeremiah, he'd be leaning in from the judge's corner and he'd be like, hey, man, don't go out there so much. And I'm like, I'll just do that. I'll just be like a sassy, like, hey man, don't go out there so much. And I'm like, I just do that. I'd just be like a sassy, like, honey, I'm going up there whenever I want. If it's funny, I'm headed up there.
Starting point is 00:39:52 So don't you even worry. Why does that voice fit you so awesome? I'm a character actor, okay? Is that you do characters? You just did Matto Lane perfectly. Yes! Can I paint you real quick? Cool.
Starting point is 00:40:17 You give me a fucking eye headache. I love much. I love them too. I love to Fuck You did the fucking thing That's funny dude. I don't know how that makes me laugh Dude, oh my head's red. Oh shit, it made me laugh too hard All right, so but so now with the wave thing mush We don't have any footage of the wave right is that only internet anywhere like a good one we could see There's like on YouTube
Starting point is 00:41:04 I like I posted stuff that hasn't been flagged by Comedy Central yet, but like I posted other clips, there's like two out there that they didn't take down for whatever reason, because I think it was on the digital side of Comedy Central, but any of the other show stuff, like it gets removed by Viacom, like as soon as I try to post it. And, but the other thing, I'll show you a part of is, you're part of two things, correct? You're part of the comedy jam. The comedy jam, yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:32 And, and Killtoni at the comedy store. So you're literally part of the three big things shows, other than stand-up comedy, right? The, these three big things that came out of the store, I mean, right? Is it the store or the comedy gym starts coming up? So the comedy gym was elsewhere. That was a place called the Lyric,
Starting point is 00:41:53 and then we did the Roxy. The shows I do at the comedy store are Killtony, Rose Battle, and then I do my show Stand Up on the Spot, which is like an improvised stand-up show. And that, I've been doing all those shows for years and years of the comedy store, like those themes shows if you wanna call them that. And Kill Tony is where comics, new comics go up
Starting point is 00:42:17 and judged by other comics, correct? You get like a minute. There's a panel comics, open micers to sometimes road dog headliners will put their name in the bucket, do a minute, and then they get critiqued by the panel or just interviewed and like, rift with and stuff like that after they do their uninterrupted minute. And I mean, when I lived in LA and I was an open micer,
Starting point is 00:42:38 everyone, every comic went on Monday night. Like, it's something we don't have in New York where you would see every single comic Monday. It's so fucking cool. What do you mean? It's a cool community. So like everybody there's with Monday at the comedy store, there's Killtony and then there's Potluck, which anybody can sign up for the open mic there. So there's two opportunities for you to get stage time at the comedy store, which is for somebody who's not a regular, that's the only day of the week that can happen. So all the comics kind of flood to there on Monday night.
Starting point is 00:43:11 So you see almost every open mic comic in the scene, like hundreds of comics will come there to sign up for one of both of those shows. It's crazy. Yeah. Wow, that is not, I almost said what she said when I'll fucking hang myself. It's crazy, it's crazy. It's crazy. Yeah. Wow, that's crazy. That is not, I almost said what she said when I'll fucking hang myself. It's crazy.
Starting point is 00:43:27 It's crazy. It's crazy. I'm talking about the fuck now. Oh, hi. Oh, hi. Oh, hi. Oh, hi. Hi.
Starting point is 00:43:38 Hi, I'm Chad. I want to do that so bad, but I'm a straight middle-aged man from Boston. With a wife and a kid I can never be cock-a-one. You've been caught mister watch your mouth. You do such a great. That's fucking funny dude. the the uh that's so funny you do that so great you play a gay man so well um I have you funny I am scary it's gonna be single scary Jeremiah so now now now Jeremiah a kill Tony is is um now the name it's Tony Hinchcliffe of course
Starting point is 00:44:22 great guy I love Tony is such a good guy. And he does this show and you guys do this. But why kill Tony, what does that mean? I don't understand the name. So he's a big Quinterin Tino fan. He loves the kill Bill movies. That's part of the reason of it. But really, you're trying to kill Tony in the way of like, can you kill it in your minute?
Starting point is 00:44:44 Like to make him laugh and everybody, can you kill Tony? That's kind of it. I think. I get it. Never made sense to me. I'm not smart enough to put it together. But as soon as you said, okay, great. I mean, it's a great name. Great fucking name. And then you did the comedy jam, which I did, did it, and you mean you did it together. Yeah. In Montreal.
Starting point is 00:45:07 Now here's the thing with the comedy jam. You get, listen, you get carried away as a, you get carried away where you actually think, all of it, it's dangerous for me. It's like famous people. I get carried away. I shouldn't be around them. Because I'd be like, hey, I'm back,
Starting point is 00:45:24 I'm doing, we should come back to my house where I can cook some steaks. You know what I mean? I get carried away. I shouldn't be around them because I'd be like, hey, I'm back. I'm doing we should come back to my house We're fucking cook some sticks. You know what I mean? I get carried like I should just be hey How you doing nice to meet you good nice to meet you all right? Take him away now, you know what I mean? Um, and this comedy jam dude is the same way. It's like all right, dude You're gonna go up do one thing and then get the fuck off and I once you get in there and I fucking I and then get the fuck off. And I, once you get in there and I fucking, I don't, I play drums on TV. I taught myself how to play basic shit.
Starting point is 00:45:50 And then you go, you should do it. You guys, you know, so, yeah, man, it's gonna be fun. It's like, all right, and then you get into it and you're playing. And you don't realize how much you suck. And that you guys are so nice that you're lifting this thing up. You know what I mean? You're literally like you're keeping it going and lifting it up so that it doesn't fall apart because if I, if you just let me go, I'd fucking ruin it. I just start singing and
Starting point is 00:46:19 I'd walk you know what I mean? I remember that. I remember. I did the ACDC song, of course, because it's the easiest thing. You guys, it was so great in it. And I did my thing and I didn't fuck up that much. And at the end, I threw my drumsticks out and hit a lady in the face. And they were like, no, no, no, you can't throw. You can't throw drumsticks anymore. It's like, that's what we are rocking over. It's so politically correct and woke.
Starting point is 00:46:48 A drummer can't throw a stick in the crowd anymore because someone will sue him because you'll take out a fucking chick's eye. I remember I threw it at this chick and she gave it back like, she didn't even want it. Here. She did.
Starting point is 00:47:04 I think this belongs to you. You gave it to my general direction. She gave it to a friend of mine. She's like, do you want this? Like she was mad because I hit her on the fucking head. I mean, it was a pretty heavy stick. It was a Vader, I think fucking B. That was a pretty heavy stick right in her fucking credit.
Starting point is 00:47:22 I just got to into it. I was like, fuck it, yeah. Well, you feel, you start feeling like it. I was like, fuck it, yeah! What do you do? You start feeling like a rock star, like the way we try to set up every comic to succeed as much as possible. Because it's one of those things where we've all wanted to, as comics, play that rock star role at some point. They say, like, I used to work in morning radio
Starting point is 00:47:43 and they said said when I started working there, so one of the on air hosts, he said, so you're going to be working here. Are you wanting to be a musician or a comedian because nobody actually wants to do morning radio? I was like, oh, that's one way to look at it. But there's people who I think who want to identify as a rock star and we try to give that to them as a little taste of what it could be like. So, you know, we're all about, at the beginning of the show, that's my job. I play like this Rody character who's like a height man to get the crowd into it and
Starting point is 00:48:22 stuff like that. So by the time the community is at the stage, it's all love. And if an instrument mess up happens, the crowd's not booing or anything. There's like, these are comedians. We know that that's not their first job. They're funny. That's the first thing that they do.
Starting point is 00:48:35 And then if you play drums, that's a secondary plus. It's like, that's awesome. Yeah, it's, but who was, I want to know this. Who was the best out of the community give me the top three holy shit They're fucking great Top three and no part to particular order Mateo Lane is one of them. He's one of them. I'm sorry who? Mateo and Mateo Lane Mateo, Mateo Lane.
Starting point is 00:49:10 He's done like some Whitney songs that like, He is like a whistle tone. He has voices insane. Like he does that like, That's exactly it. Mateo Mateo was hugely talented. It's like hugely talented. Mateo Lane, Melissa Vies and your. Really?
Starting point is 00:49:33 Melissa Vies and your. Who? Do you know her? No, I know. She's on Saturday night live. She's been on there a couple of seasons now, but she's alley comic. Can you bring her up? She did.
Starting point is 00:49:44 I'm like the video of the wave that I asked you for 20 minutes ago. Can you, he might have left. He might have had to go do something. Misch, you there? I mean, we couldn't pull up, like, like, near my side, we couldn't pull up the wave video. Oh, yeah, because, oh, Misch is on top. I'm sorry, yeah, because we put, I would do it, pull this up. Can you pull the goat fucking on alligator?
Starting point is 00:50:04 And then we get flagged Videos get fucking douche these like I told you then he goes I told you you couldn't I tried to tell you so many times for you kept asking you Pulled up, but I mean I'll do it, but I think Jeremy said by a combo pull down immediately Do you want to get flagged or oh? Yeah, okay, I know her she was just in the Adam Salah movie. Yeah, yes Yeah, Cubi she was a cat lady. Yeah, yeah, that was that's funny because that is mush's voice until I push him too far And they go fuck you too
Starting point is 00:50:49 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. So those two there's another comic named Brent Moran who did a Chester Bennington cover that was in Montreal one year that was pretty mind blowing. I don't know, I don't have to tell you to bring that up. Do I? Moshia following along right now? Yeah. And then Um, there's been, uh, Mark Marin on guitar is surprisingly one of those were one of those left turns where I was like, pretty blown away by his guitar skills because not, you know, not many comics will come on the show to do, um, and play their own instruments and stuff like that. But that's always exciting when a comic can do that. He French. No, but he exciting when a comic can do that. Is he French? No, but he looks like he could be in that picture.
Starting point is 00:51:28 I'll say it's I'm not in the industry. He's a guy who's had five chances and failed every time and keeps getting more. Oh my God. Wow. Mush. Sarah my part. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:51:38 But I'm really sorry. I just said that. I apologize. He seems like a nice guy. I don't really know why I overreacted like that. Let's get back to the show Robert. I'm sorry, I'm really mush out. Most just said what comics say in the room after the show about sound. Most just like mush, this is recording, bro.
Starting point is 00:52:04 about. Most just like, and this is recording, bro. It's coming out. You're putting it out. I've been nice for 10 years and nothing gets you either way. I lived in Kevin Brennan. Chill the fuck out. Okay. No, I'm not saying he's not funny. What I'm saying, he's a guy TV show after TV show. And it't work and they keep giving them another show But it's weird to make much you're doing good things are coming back We're gonna get there, okay Sorry, I just came back to I blocked out there for a second. Um, did I say anything mean when I was No, it's okay much. We're gonna we're gonna cut that part. We're gonna actually that's gonna be the clip by the way If you think that's nothing and I'm tagging that kid, what's his name?
Starting point is 00:52:48 Fucking John Glott, John Glott, man. What is he? Brett Moran. You know, so I don't know Brett, but you know, I take it, you don't like. No, he's a fine person. I'm saying it's one of the things in the industry than him.
Starting point is 00:53:05 Right, right. Okay, okay. So he can sing good. And what about Burr? Burr is amazing on drums though. Burr is super fun to watch on drums because he takes it really seriously and he'll come and rehearse a couple hours before and dude, he let us, I mean, one of my favorite jam memories is just when he was playing the garden.
Starting point is 00:53:25 He said, do you guys want to come just hang out and jam in an empty garden, so I don't have to get inside my head about the show. So he rented all the equipment, like guitars, drums. I brought my sacks for no reason. I was like, I have, I have an instrument. I play sax, yeah. Get the fuck. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:49 Do you have it right there? I actually have it right here. Get in the mix. Can I listen to me? Can I say something, Jeremiah? Yeah. I love the saxophone. Do you really? I really fucking do.
Starting point is 00:54:03 I really love the saxophone. I mean, it is one of the most amazing, holy shit instruments out there. I really do. I love it. Can you play it? Can I hear it? What, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what do you want to hear? Do you want to hear something or just want to hear me? I want to hear something. I would do both. Okay. Give us what you think. Yes. Get the fuck out of here. This is the first time somebody has ever done real talent on YKWD. I can't even believe it. Do you understand that? This is the first time somebody, I mean, people have come on as comedians, but never have I had talent. Except we had a magician once. magician once But that's but this is like talent
Starting point is 00:54:48 Let me hear this I can't wait That means that be funny if he can't play That stinks This guy sucks. What's happening? This guy's got big balls and he stinks. Let's go. Music Wow. Wow. Yes. What did I do? This was your face. Well, I'm sorry. Was I doing that? I really you are feeling sexual about it. Well, it's fucking great.
Starting point is 00:56:10 I mean, do you understand the only talent I have is stand up comedy? You played drum. You played drum. I played drums a little bit, but not not that. That was that was amazing That was some that's that remind me of the Simpsons episode that remind me of that was some Joey D for in Chesco shit right there. That was great. I like how you can only come up with fake saxophone players First of all Joey's probably one of the greatest jazz musicians of all time dumb dumb
Starting point is 00:56:47 Hello Acknowledged your joke being wrong more of the sense this part of it, but it was fine. All right the tips is I apologize Bobby I'll go back to my corner. Okay, I'm really sorry about that That's the best mosh ever. I, uh, that's great, man. Holy shit. Now, why did you learn that and not follow through with that?
Starting point is 00:57:13 And how did you get sidetracked from all the hours it took to become that? And then you got sidetracked to, to, to, to be a comic and, and, and, in this shit business. It was one of those things where I've always, like, I've been musically inclined. I did, like, I grew up singing and playing sax and stuff like that and school plays and all that stuff. But comedy was always number one. Like, it was always like, the music stuff
Starting point is 00:57:42 was always on the side. So, like, I took lessons as a kid And I kept with it and I'm actually been In quarantine been trying to practice and play even more sacks because it's one of those things I might as well try to get better at while there's downtime while we're not on the road and doing as many shows and stuff like that but it's it's a weird thing where and doing as many shows and stuff like that. But it's a weird thing where the sax has merged like an intersected with in comedy
Starting point is 00:58:10 in the weirdest ways where there's not like many comedians that you know the play sax. So that will come up. That'll just come up like for like sketches or random things like like do you guys know anybody who plays an insurance like, oh, I know that guy would play sax. Dude, that's what I do on Killtony. I'm like, I'm the band leader on that show.
Starting point is 00:58:29 So every week, we commit to different characters. Like, so if the tonight show, like, has the roots, it'd be like, if the roots committed to different characters every single week on the, on the tonight show, that's what we do on Killtony. So we dress up in different wigs and costumes and I'm playing music on that every week. And then on the comedy gym, I play sax when they need it. And it's weird how out within comedy, like the sax has like found a little niche within that.
Starting point is 00:58:56 I don't know. So glad, I'm so glad. I would never want you opening for me. I hate to get taric in front of me. Never mind, I got with a sax. How do you follow that? I keep, I get it. That is one thing. People people ask me like when I go out and headline on the road They're like where's your sax? I'm like no, I'm keeping that separate like I'm not gonna be the guy who's like
Starting point is 00:59:13 I'd so so a woman walks into a bar I'm not doing that act. I'm not doing that thing If I had to follow a guy with a sack, you'd come back and I would be a dump right in the fucking right in the hoodie of sacks. I would stick it directly on my asshole and right in the bell there. How great would it be to shit in that? It's like a perfect little shitter. I mean, it's great. I'm along with you. I never thought about doing that, but. I was never thought about doing that. I look at things that would be nice to shit in
Starting point is 00:59:50 and the sacs would be perfect. A tube would be too big. That sacs would go right over your asshole muscle and go right into the fucking hole. Have you ever pooped in a cup? Have you ever done that? Never. Oh, I've done that.
Starting point is 01:00:04 Yeah, I've done that. Yeah, I've done that. I would fill it. Because I was on a road trip with some buddies and he took a dump outside our hotel room floor door. And I was really mad that he pooped us out our door. So I pooped in a cup and I put it inside his room so that he had to find it. And like, I didn't want to put on the carpet inside the room like for the hotel staff. So I just, you know, put it in a cup inside his room, so that he had to find it. And like, I didn't want to put on the carpet inside the room, like for the hotel staff.
Starting point is 01:00:27 So I just, you know, put it in a cup inside his room. Like, right. Just gross, just gross teenage stuff from back in the day. I did that one time with Big J and Joe DeRose. I jerked off and took my comrade and put it on their door and off outside the door and then knocked on the door. And then they came out and they were like, what's this?
Starting point is 01:00:46 And they grabbed it and they're like, oh, fuck. What the fuck? That's pretty gnarly, dude. That's pretty gnarly. It's pretty funny. I would never do this anymore, but I used to.
Starting point is 01:01:02 If the comic got a better room than me once in a while, it would happen. With the middle act, we'd always get a, he comic got a better room than me, once in a while it would happen, where the middle act would always get him, he'd get the better room, like the hotel didn't understand or they gave that, he'd say that he'd get some sweet and I'd get some shit fucking regular room. I'd go into that room, do you want this room? I'd go, no, you take it, I just go and pee in the tub.
Starting point is 01:01:23 I'd go to the office, you gotta take it. I just go and pee on the tub I've got to do it. It was a silly very silly insecure move But it made me feel better just knowing a hot when mush go a hot piss was right there. Anyways mush you getting a snack Yeah, I'm working on some twizzlers over here Don't worry about me. I got some twizzlers over here. Don't worry about me. I got some twizzlers and there's also some Reese's pieces that I'm really fond of right now. Have you guys ever tried Reese's pieces? I love them, yeah. Yeah, it takes me back to E.T., the extraterrestrial, really solid Spielberg film.
Starting point is 01:01:59 I watched in theaters as a kid after they replaced the guns with flashlights because it was too extreme. Really. It was quite the experience for me as a kid after they replaced the guns with flashlights because it was too extreme. Really, it was quite the experience of his child. Did they really do that? That's a real thing that they did. When they re-released the theatrical version of ET, they replaced the guns and offers with flashlights because they thought it'd be too alarming to the children watching it later in the 90s than from the 80s kids. Fuck it.
Starting point is 01:02:29 Stupid. Just get that. That's getting to this question. You know, LA. I mean, New York City's kind of fucking, you know, it's a wrap right now. And LA is, I mean, everybody's, I mean, dude, people are leaving, I mean, L.A. I mean, God damn it, dude. I mean, the top of the fucking pyramid, I mean, the podcasting, the comedy store,
Starting point is 01:02:52 the clubs, everything was happening. And now it seems like in seven months, it's all falling apart. People are moving, they're gone, they're not going back, they're establishing something in, you know, lorogan, all these other comics, all the lower level comics are gone. And the clubs are closed. I mean, is it, is LA finished? Is it, is it, how long, I mean, when it comes back, it's not going to be the same. It's, it's hard because to see how far it came and for it to drop off as hard again is pretty
Starting point is 01:03:30 crushing because I have been working at the, I've been working the comedy store for a while now since probably I started off there like working my way up there in like 2011. So to see where it's come in these last like nine years, it's amazing the trajectory and the see it fall off where it is right now because of the pandemic, it's tough. It's going to take a long time to come back, but it's one of those things where the way I look at it as a guy who, you know, I paint my do's there a little bit, but not as much as some of the other guys and some of the guys who are leaving, you know,
Starting point is 01:04:10 that opens up spots to some of the guys who are hustling and more of the up and comers like myself who maybe might get bumped up in the lineup just a little bit and that's the only way I can look at it. It's be positive and just try to write it out because I'm not playing on leaving. So it's just gonna take a minute, but I'm lucky that I get to go out on the road a little bit
Starting point is 01:04:31 and headline, so I'll be able to have that at least to kind of keep me steady in the town. You and Tony go on the road a lot, right? Yeah, we used to go on the road, like for years and years, I've been on the road with Tony more than any other comic. So Kill Tony is one of those shows that it's a little difficult right now for us to tour with because it's an ensemble.
Starting point is 01:04:54 And you don't, for an ensemble on stage right now, it's just not the right time for that. So, but we were doing it. And it's very edgy. I mean, you guys brought edgy comedy to California. Like that store crew was fucking twisted. Like I felt like a, like we, ONA and all of us, when we're doing that shit, we were just twisted fucked up guys doing this crazy humor. And then, like LA really didn't have that and then all of a sudden Rogan and in in your crew with Diaz and in Callin and you know, Bert and Seger and all
Starting point is 01:05:35 of you younger guys and Tony and Sam, you guys really fucking just said fuck it. And it was really edgy, really funny, really politically incorrect, and it was great. And now I feel like it's like everybody's leaving. Like, I mean, people are fucking mass exodus out of that state. I also think that when there's a vaccine and when the pandemic really comes to a halt, I feel like a lot of the people who did move were the bigger comics, they're well off enough where I think they're going to be coming back and forth a lot.
Starting point is 01:06:15 I really, you know what I mean? I think that it'll be that thing where when some comics reach that point, their career, they are in LA and New York, like they kind of split their time. I think it's going to be the same thing with Texas and LA. They're just going to be bouncing kind of back and forth. Right. We'll see. Wow. Now we'll see, man. It's a great, I mean, I love what what Adam did with that club
Starting point is 01:06:38 and the comics did with that club. They kind of, you know, that community, you need that community. Well need that community. That's a thing. So for me as a visitor, I've been out to like the seller a few times, with Jeff Ross and we're in New York or when I'm just in town, like out there doing podcasts or whatever,
Starting point is 01:06:56 gone to the seller. And that's the closest feel to me that I've seen like of like how clubs parallel each other or like it's like a weird distorted reflection. Like the, you know, the area where there's that, those tables where only the seller guys can sit and stuff like that. There's a couple of places like that in the comedy store,
Starting point is 01:07:17 there's these back booth seats and like there's this back bar that if you're not a paid regular, if you're not passed, you're not even allowed in that area. and I like that. I like stuff like that Or you have to earn your chops and you have to earn the respect of people. Yeah, it's a goal Yeah, you need I always say that is that clubs that give young comics a goal Instead of saying hey bring in 10 people and you're in You're fucking them because you're not allowing them 10 people and you're in, you're fucking them. Because you're not allowing them to be a paid regular
Starting point is 01:07:47 to get passed by SD is a certificate that you've earned. That's your diploma. You know, you pass that fucking grade, man. Now you can go to college. You know what I'm saying? It's like you have that. Like, you know, so when that happens there, You know what I'm saying? It's like you have that. You know. So when that happens there, like getting your name or being a pay regular is a thing that
Starting point is 01:08:13 is that's why when it's abused, I feel like that Tommy guy fucking abused it for years. I feel like Adam was like, you know what? We're going to do this the right way. he told a bunch of people when he started. He goes, I'm sorry. I know you've had things a certain way under the former talent coordinator, but I'm not booking. He just started, he went down the list of people
Starting point is 01:08:38 who he didn't find. And he cleaned house of the list of comics. He's like, I don't want to waste your time. I don't want you to waste my time. Like, you've had a good run here, and I hate to say it, but like, I'm done booking you. He went down the list of people who he found that were, you know, we all seen those comics who,
Starting point is 01:08:56 they're funny, but they've been doing the same jokes for like 10, 15 years. They're not working on their craft related. They're not even going on the road that much anymore and it's like yeah They kill in the rich boss Keith Roberts You know I'm mad because that dumb Tommy fuck I would have been in at the cellar You know, I would have been in at the store I probably had my name on the fucking thing by now. And that cock sucker gave me some fantasy speech, you know, name
Starting point is 01:09:28 hate. Mother fucker. Well, you know what? There's there's some there's some spots opening up. There's some people who just left for Texas. So come back to my guy. I'll be the fat Joe Rogan. Bloded Rogan. Yeah, I bloated. Yeah, salted Rogan. I don't I'm going to see some fucking asshole that just opened for me and fucking Kansas City get his name painted on the wall. I should be grandfathered in mother fucker. I'm from Kansas City, so that was such a perfect analogy. Oh good. Well, good man.
Starting point is 01:10:09 I'm glad you have a positive attitude about it, because I think it's all going to die and you're going to have nothing in every public going to close. And you're going to have to move to Austin. But listen, you think... That's why we had you on. You think... Now you got an album coming out soon, too, correct? Or special.
Starting point is 01:10:23 I do. Yeah, yeah. In December. On December 8th. Yeah. I've always been a fan of yours, dude. You've always been super nice to me, too. You've always been just a sweet dude.
Starting point is 01:10:35 And you're hilarious. I've followed you on what you and Tony used to do in the airports and shit used to make me laugh. And kill Tony. And like I said the wave Was my favorite it was my favorite thing. I just wanted to see a show with that And I'm glad I'm glad you you came on today. Will you come back on in December? Dude, I would love to I'd love to and yeah, dude. I just want to say I'm I've been a, like, just comic to comic. I've been a fan of your comedy for many years. And you are one of the, the comics who I had,
Starting point is 01:11:10 one of your first, one of my first comedy albums that I had, like when I started purchasing and not, like, downloading albums was one of your albums. So I remember being excited to show my mom your comedy central, I think it was your comedy central special, where you're in socks on the album. Yeah, oh, just the tips. Just the tips. That was my album.
Starting point is 01:11:33 Yeah, yeah, man. So, oh, buddy, thanks so much. I mean, even if there was some LA horse shit, I like it. Thank you for your work. Dude, it wasn't. I got that. I got it. I'm fine with your.
Starting point is 01:11:44 I'm not taking it. I know. I know. I got your album, album though when I worked at the radio station. They had swag. And I was like, can I have that? And they're like, yeah, you can have that. I would say what Steve Burnday, my first album, self-produced. So I blah, blah, blah. He calls me, he says me an email one day. He goes, dude, check your email. It was five of my albums. He found that a good will Got them for 50 cents and he stepped on them Really I love that Comics would just fucking terrible human beings. What do you have to plug now, man? What do you got going on now?
Starting point is 01:12:28 I just have my podcast, Jeremiah Wonders, which I got to get you on some time. I got to get you guys on some time. What do you mean? It's, I do, it's just a big riff fest. I have the comics on. We do impressions. We do characters. There's anybody can call in at any moment.
Starting point is 01:12:45 I've got this phone filter that I put on the line and stuff like that and it's just like riffing with characters and being silly. And I do a segment actually called Sacks Talk where you share a story of a sexual encounter and then I paint it with the sacks, like you started. Yeah, so it's good. So it's such a fucking creative dude, man.
Starting point is 01:13:03 I love it. I love it, really. I mean it, dude, I love it. I love it. Really. I'm I mean it dude I love that that sounds you out. I'll definitely do it. Thanks. Yeah, that'd be awesome All right brother. Well, thanks for coming on And we'll see you back in December. We'll have you back on you ever get annoyed with Tony when he shout you out at you Yeah, I mean we get annoyed yeah, we get annoyed with each other, but that's part of the dynamic of the show is, is, is I push his buttons and he pushes mine and that's, you know, sounds very similar to this show, right?
Starting point is 01:13:35 Much. That's kind of, that's kind of the comedy of it all. I mean, at the end of the day, we're all very good friends on the show, so that's kind of how I look at it. Well, yeah, we definitely annoy each other on the show so that's kind of how I look at it. Well, yeah, we definitely annoy each other on the show. Would you say much? Well, there's the difference. Well, it's different.
Starting point is 01:13:50 I said at the end of the day, we all love each other and we're good friends. Well, that's the difference. I like it a lot, much, you know. I wish I could see a video of much right now. I'm loving the genuine laugh that's coming out of it. It's mouth right now. He's actually our Jarvis. He's our mush.
Starting point is 01:14:14 Watch around the bush, Docs. He's a little the voice thing that comes around. I listened, man. I really thank you for doing this extra 10. This is for Patreon only. You want the extra 10 of the YKWD, the Friday, Catherine Kelly, only on Patreon and be part of the Jerkhoff party on Saturday nights. You have to be a member of patreon.com, Sash Robert Kelly.
Starting point is 01:14:40 If you are a fan of mine, you should be over there. Go join today. It's one fucking cup of coffee five bucks And you are in you get everything all the shows live culture and Kelly live YKWD live you can be in the chat right now hanging out with us And you get the 10 minutes extra free, which is usually 20 minutes every week not just 10 and get the 10 minutes extra free, which is usually 20 minutes every week, not just 10. And you get the, all the other stuff live from the shed, you get tech talk with bobbin friends, all my one on ones are up there archived. You get it.
Starting point is 01:15:14 And it's for the five bucks price of a cup of coffee. Also, go to the YKWD page, check out my 30day less titty challenge. We're on week What am I three right week three? I think so Monday. Yep. It's morning. We have mr. Mike Calta join us on The 30-day less titty challenge. We got two weeks left. I feel it. I feel fucking strong. I want a fucking Ties fucking tight. Yes, this is the jacket Bonnie made me and she gave me bell-bottom fucking Happen here your wizard Bobby. Ah, fuck it. I could be a fat magician with this stuff Where'd that come from? I don't know Oh, where'd that come from? I don't know.
Starting point is 01:16:08 I'm not asleep. Now it's fell. I got to pick it up. It's going to take me a day. All right, brother. Thank you so much for coming on. I'll see you in December. You come back on. I'll see you in LA in New York, right, brother. Yeah. I'll be out in New York the first week of November. All right. Perfect, man. I'll take care. Gabby, what do you got? You know the day I follow me on Instagram, listen to my podcast. Let's sign up for my newsletter.
Starting point is 01:16:33 You know, the same thing every week. Every week you got your newsletter that I'm a fucking member of. God damn it. I didn't even read it yet. I'll read it. I will read it when it wears up. He's a shit. It's been offered three weeks Read it. I ain't it No, then I don't want to read it. You have to read it. I don't want to read it. You have to read it What's happening in comedy right now that would work the newsletter. It's called being creative mush. It's called doing different things in different moments, okay?
Starting point is 01:17:12 Well, that's what I'm asking you. So people will go to it. It's on my, the link in my bio on my Instagram and Twitter has the form to sign up for it. It's just you get funny essay. I write a essays every one of the 1950s. Who wants a funny essay? Me! Because you said comedy newsletter. I thought you were just talking about things happening in comedy. Oh no. That sounds way more interesting than that. Like what you're doing is better than what I thought it was. Oh, no, it has nothing to do with standup. It's just Essays for comedic essays. So sign up. It's fun. All right. I'm gonna read one and if can I can I judge it next week for realsies? Yeah, but you have to post it if you want to judge it on here. You have to post it on your Instagram story What the fuck did you just managlio me into if you want to judge it in real time on this podcast,
Starting point is 01:18:08 you have to share it on your Instagram story. You must have done anybody catch what she just did. She just fucking, she is going to be so big in this business. Your dad taught you well. You just fucked me into a corner. So if I want to get content out of you and it might cost you some time, I might be critiquing of you. I have to give you promotion so that more people will go like it. So you're in a win, win situation. Precisely. It's called being a businesswoman
Starting point is 01:18:39 and a Jew. All right. Well, yeah, that's right. Jacob said she's Jewish. All right, listen, that was a great show. Really good show. Really great. So good. He's so funny. Who's here? Hey, come on in, buddy. Here he is. Let me unplug this. Oh, shit. Oh, and hang on a second. Maxi. Max, watch a mouth. Watch your mouth. Want to say hi to everybody? Real quick, go ahead. Hi, Gabby. Hi, Mike.
Starting point is 01:19:11 Comic down. Hey, Mike works. Can everybody hear me very loud? Oh, it's too loud. You got to break the microphone. Oh, you know what? Let go. Let go of the mic. Listen, all you do is talk like this.
Starting point is 01:19:27 Regular. I have to talk like this because I'm too loud. What's up, bud? What's up? How are you? Doing good. Yeah, good all you got. Yeah, there's a thing that he's trying to clean a pipe right now.
Starting point is 01:19:42 That's the only thing he's doing. He's not doing anything. How did your school work on? Great. Did you? Did you? Wait? Let me ask question. Did you quit? Or did you get through it? I quit it. You wasn't joking. I did it. I didn't quit. I did it. I did it. Did you get the factory? You did it. Give me a give me a hug. Yeah! Oh
Starting point is 01:20:09 Who's not max who's up who is on your shirt It's it So good Say goodbye. Yeah, look I'm not going actually gonna break the mic stop. Hi. Hi, we guys. We're going to say we are on the 24th of October, of October, Ron Bennington. Ron Bennington. Great Ron Bennington.
Starting point is 01:20:35 The great one Bennington. And me, and me, and me. And we'll be at the blue class stadium. And we'll be at the blue class stadium. Yes. And where is it? Boston Blue Clostetium. Yes. And where is it? Boston. No, it's a New Jersey.
Starting point is 01:20:49 New Jersey in Boston. Listen, all you're going to do is go live from home plate.com for tickets. It's this Saturday night, man. It's going down. Me and Ron Bennington, next stop. Please stop. Stop it.
Starting point is 01:21:02 It's not fair. I don't want to take it. And then it's a Saturday night okay it's one of my only shows left this year so go get your tickets VIP is done but there's a bunch of other tickets so get that done yeah thanks Lou for saying max is a ball champ cuz dad I gotta read the names dad has to get me a new scooter He has to get the gold one. I know. That's like 79 If you don't sit away, I'm gonna tell the rest I'm gonna return the scooter
Starting point is 01:21:34 You want me to? Don't get the school you're sweating. I go there. All right, listen. Let me get this done Can we get a read the names right mush? Yep, I got him ready, but also the veterans in November 4th, that side flitters, KELOLY live. But Robert Kelly might count to myself, Joe Russell and Austin are all going to be there. And then Thursday, November 5th through November 7th, we will be performing standup comedy at side flitters. Get your tickets now. Those shows will probably be sold out pretty soon.
Starting point is 01:22:10 Yes. It's going to be, it's going to be a crazy crazy show. So I can't wait for this. I can't wait. You're going to be down there. It's going to be awesome. What is he have to delete? How do I delete that? What is Jacob have to delete? I don't know. He says, whoops, how do I delete that? Yeah, let's see what he has to delete What did he say what did Jacob do now? Oh forget it? Doesn't matter. You know he did something. Let's read the names. I think I got the names this week Let's read the names. Here we go. Ready. Yes. Okay. All right. Here we go ready now You have to do something if it's a $10 membership you you have to do something crazy for $10. So go, boob boob boob boob boob boob. 10 times, all right. So think of something, ready?
Starting point is 01:22:49 We got Curtis Wheatley. Ow. All right. That's 10 nasty Nate. Ow. all right. That's what's going on. Tracey. Tracey. Tracey. Out. Out. Out.
Starting point is 01:23:13 10. You got to do 10. Not that hard. Out. Go on. Since you've been to a much bobby tier. This is next. This is next level.
Starting point is 01:23:24 No, you don't do anything on this one. You say thank you. Chris Lumberto. Thank you. No, no, no, it's got nothing. It's got to pay another five of you. I guess people have five six seven eight nine ten two one two one two one two one Gregory Dunzick What no ten go Not so six five six
Starting point is 01:23:58 ten eight nine nine ten ha ha ha Back off jack Back off these two fingers Back off Jack We're gonna have the show
Starting point is 01:24:19 Listen you guys the best Hi listen you guys the best you Moosh you got anything that's it right? like comment subscribe follow us at why can't you do podcasts the best things the world love you you know what dude see you next week con volotea la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Espectacularismos, monumentos, rincones de película y un sincín de aventuras te esperan. ¡Fliparás! Vuelades de Madrid, a Murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros.
Starting point is 01:25:15 Volotea. Tarifa sujetas a disponibilidad. Consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. A punta com...

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