Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Joe List, Sarah Tollemache | Full Philly Toot

Episode Date: April 26, 2021

This week Joe List and Sarah Tollemache join Bobby to get into Gay cinema, Bobby experience with love scenes, and what's happening to sex scenes in modern movies! SUBSCRIBE TO YKWD https://www.patreon.com/robertkelly https://thelaughbutton.podlink.to/YKWD​ http://www.ykwdpodcast.com FOLLOW YKWD http://www.twitter.com/YKWDpodcast http://www.instagram.com/ykwdudepodcast http://www.facebook.com/YkwdPodcast FOLLOW ROBERT KELLY http://www.twitter.com/robertkelly http://www.instagram.com/robertkellylive http://www.facebook.com/robertkellylive New episodes arrive every Sunday via The Laugh Button For advertising opportunities email: [e-mail] Go Premium: https://www.patreon.com/robertkelly Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hoy es un día de eso de no saber cómo va a acabar el día. Donde nadie pregunta, ¿dónde viene? Si no, ¿por qué no te viene? Y una ronda es el tiempo que pasa en treno, con hacernos y no creer olvida. Hoy es un día de eso, que Madrid nos lia. Hoy es un día de eso, que Madrid nos encuentra. Maú, la vida es más vida cuando nos encontramos.

Encuentra en los bares de Madrid la dicción especial de Madrid nos lia. Un número de maú, a Madrid. Buscas contenido gratis. ¡Au, one and busy! Pluto TV es el servicio de streaming gratuito con series como South Park o Sensación de Vivir. Descarga ya la aplicación en todos tus dispositivos. Pluto TV, ven a verlos sin pagar nunca. Sabemos lo importante que es sentirse acompañado. en todos tus dispositivos. Pluto TV, ven a verlo sin pagar nunca. Siempre que se mantenga las circunstancias económico financieras del solicitante en el momento de la solicitud. Oh, school, back in the day, we're all starting to be bored of all. I'm the only white kid that I use.

The podcast is so fun and crazy, and as a rule, you're ruining this. First of all, I'm gonna be proud of this party. It's not my podcast. This is an NPR. That's what the podcast does. Is there any better show? This is the original original. You know what dude, what's up everybody? Yes, we're back. You know what dude podcast the one

the longest running podcast in the fucking planet and we've been doing this for a very long time. Me, myself and I, with a bunch of other very talented comedians, because you know, look, I can't, I can't swing on on my own. You know what I mean? I'm not a fucking, I can't be out here just yapping, because I'll run down a fucking dead end slam into a brick wall. We'll do a 10 minute podcast. But I can share us how fucking open the show. First of all, I want to thank all the new members of the Patreon, Patreon.com, Stash Robert Kelly. If you haven't joined, please join now.

Go there. If you're watching here, you should be over there and join up. It's the price of a cup of coffee. You get a bunch of shit. There's all kinds of levels. And I want to say thanks to all the new people that have joined. Next month, we have, our experiences coming on. We got another special guest I'm working on.

So next month is gonna be fucking spectacular too. This month has been nuts. We had Tim Dillon, Andrew Schilds. And tonight, we have one of the regs, one of the originals, aka the truth. Joe List is here and his wife Sarah will be joining us. They're running into a little internet problems. Hopefully we'll fix any it. I guess in Queens it gets a little rough. And of course we have the mush, aka the mush, mush, the San Antonio, fucking

Mexican, the Texas three as we call them because he's the size of three people. And the lady bugs are in the chat They're in there right now watching live. This is the unedited version of YKWD And we also do the extra 15 at the end. It's 10 15 20 whatever we do That's for patreon only so subscribe hit the subscribe button. You know you like it, okay? Like it subscribe it comment Join the patreon. Let's fucking do this. So let's introduce everybody right now.

We got, of course, oh, there he is, Joe, the truth, and Sarah. Why haven't you taken Joe's last name? Like in the book. I tried and then it was such a pain in the ass that I turned it back. You gave his name back? What? Sarah list? I know. Well, you have to do all this stuff to change your name. What? Well, first of all, I didn't have any time because I had a day job at the time and then doing shows at night. So I put everything in an envelope

and sent it off to the government office to change it, but I never received it. So all of my documents went missing. So then I had to go back to Social Security Administration and then get everything done from scratch, but then they found it. And then I was like, this is so much of a pain in the ass. I just want, I'll go back to my last name.

Joe, did that bother you or do you not give a fuck? You don't give a fuck? No, I don't give a, first of all, I'm a feminist, as everybody knows, I love cuts and I said from the get go. I was like, don't take my name, it's stupid. It does, it does, it does no need. You're already a professor, she was gonna keep her professional name anyways and I don't care I own her I don't need her to have the same last name I'm sorry I'm like what did you say I own her she

belongs to me we had the ceremony you did the ceremony I know that I was part of you owning her yes I'm very proud of that is a very an exchange property. Yes, I'm so glad when you when you got your new your new ownership of Sarah, that was an awesome day. Yeah, she got herpes and I got ownership over her life. So the name thing wasn't that important to me. Right. Yeah. And Sarah list is it's it's Sarah lists sounds like some type of sausage patty from like you know to me. Yeah like Jimmy Dean sausage. Yeah like yeah. Sarah lists sausage patty. Yeah, I'm here. Missy. It's the only sausage we know. I thought about changing my name to Joe Talamash. I kind of like that. Joe, no, Joe Talamash is a chess player and he's a sword player.

Swordfighter. No, Joe Tala Mosh, you do not wanna be that guy. Are you gonna find it and be Jala Mosh? Jala Mosh. Yeah. That would be good. And you could put like a, get an orange hunter's hat and put it just on the back of your head

where it looks like it's gonna fall off during your set but it never does. How does that happen? I've seen it. What the fuck is your head where it looks like it's going to fall off during your set, but it never does. How does that happen? I've seen it. What the fuck is that uniform that everybody's wearing nowadays? What are we just talking about? Oh, go ahead, Sam. No, what uniform is everyone wearing?

I've seen all these comics seem to be wearing wool hats on the back of their, just the back of their heads. It's not a, it's not a, my head's cold. It's a thing where they I guess Like Sprostein did it springstein did it like in like seven early springsteen like 72 to 74 He had it going But now I think it's it's become a cool look. I know what you're talking about. There's a few guys that rocket Yeah, well, there's a lot of people that rocket. I was in Chicago a a lot of the, the new hipsters are wearing the wool hat on the back of the head. I mean, even our lovely Joe Russell, who we love here, we love it. The Coatter and Kelly, who

does his new five minutes and is the star of the chishoo. Have you seen the chishoo, guys? We know about the chishoo. We're driving home. Yeah, we drove home one. Yeah, well, he wears it on the back of his head. What the fuck did you just do? I got bad gas. Oh, Max. I mean, I'll tell you what I'm talking about this. My son has the worst gas of, I mean, of anybody I've ever met. He's like a 95 year old woman and he's, we're at the donut tonight and the waiter comes over as a girl. And he's we're at the diner tonight and the waiter comes over to go can I get a napkin point? I'm like Maximus and it's so loud that you can't help but laugh while you're scolding him.

Yeah. And he's like what? And he goes, he does it again. I'm like, what? I hope he's not one of those fart on cue guys. You know, you know, you're a fart family. You're a fart family. You're a fart family. That's a good question.

So what you're asking is, do we all fart? Now here's Don. So funny because last night was the first time she farted in front of me in probably years. But last night was horrific. I thought she shit the bed. I thought she shit herself. I literally, the dog jumped off the bed and jumped on the floor and slept on her bed on the floor. She sat in bed and she was trying to keep it tight. And when she scoots her knees up, her asshole just opened up just the seal broke in front.

And I was like, what? I literally, because I've never heard her fart. I was like, what the fuck? And she's a big one. And I'm like, what's wrong? And she's, I'm like, what was that? And she's, and she did two more. And then the smell was fucking disgusting.

It's like she ate beef, like dinty more beef stew. It was like at the beach all day. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Just see water in your ass all. Just see water. Lobster rolls and pizza. This heart. Oh, fucking gross. And so Dawn doesn't fart, but Max, and Dawn doesn't care. She's like, what, leave him alone. It's just a fart. And I'm like, I know that, but I just don't want him to, I think there should be, he should know, you know, there's certain places where you can too, and certain places you gotta kind of let it come out a little sneaky, you know?

Well, what we have here is a fart family. And the reason Sarah brought it up is my friend Derek. You've met my friend Derek. And, you know, they like to fart and it's funny. Pull my finger and rip it. And then after dinner, you stand up and you fart. But he was, we were laughing because he had to tell my niece, his kid, bro, who's eight, and he had to say

they were going to someone else's house. And she rips farce to be funny. He had to say, he had to sit her down and be like, listen, where a fart family. But not every family is a fart family. So you can't do that. You have to feel out if they're a fart family because when I was growing up, we were not a fart family. I've never heard either of my parents fart.

No, Sarah's family is British. So if you fart, they fucking shoot you. Something. Yeah, you throw hot food in your face. Yeah, so we both grew up in a non fart family, but it sounds like you're raising your kid into fart family, which I think is good. I don't quite listen. I think Morgan Murphy said it to me once.

If you don't laugh at farts, I don't wanna know you. Exactly. If you don't, when somebody farts and you don't think it's funny, if you've ever used a fart app and didn't laugh your ass off at the wet mosquito, you're not a funny person, you have no soul. No, I don't want to have. I don't want a fart family.

I think we're half fart family. I think my family, I think Don doesn't fart. Don doesn't fight ever, but she's letting him fart. I fart, but I don't want him to fart. Do you understand the the fucking confusion I'm having? Like, I'm the farder and I don't want him to be a fart family. No, father, father. I'm a farder.

Yeah, I'm a farder. I want to stop the farting in my... You know what I say? I want to raise a better family. I want, you know, say, I don't want to raise a better family. I want his family to be better, but Don's raising him to be a father. I mean, one of your favorite Instagram ever is him farting on the best. We need to watch it pretty regularly, actually. Like every couple of weeks, by the way, the butter King just nailed it.

Bobby's in denial. Yeah, you're a fart family. And I think you embrace it. It doesn't mean you're low class people. It means you're fun people. You just have to say, Max, where a fart family, other families aren't. So you can't go to, you know, whatever,

the butter scotch house, or I couldn't think of a last name. I don't know why I said butter scotch. That was terrible. The nose family, whatever. You can't go to the dormant's house and say, and fart. No, I'm saying intellectual, you know? Well, you go to no-mess house and you fart and you have like,

Robert. That would be like, Robert. And it's like, are you mad at me or do you hate me? Like, I don't know. Are you laughing like, Robert? Like that thing, I farted. Like Max is chew't know. Are you, are you laughing like robbers? Like that thing I, I've, I've farted it. Like Max is too to do that a couple times. I farted on stage to where it's so bad that the front row, there was this chubby girl in the front row got mad at her boyfriend and punched him

in the arm. And I literally like, that was me. Like, I'm so sorry, dude. She thought he tutored. It was disgusting. It was fucking gross. It can change the tone of the room. People can be having a really great time and you do that. And people get so mad. Oh, yeah. Keith Robinson, you know, we would, we, I hope we still do it, but me, Manny has started the tradition at the seller. We would bring all of us to Del Frisco's. Me, Colin, Keith, Norton, who else? SD, Ava, and then Noam picked it up Noam and Juanita, and we'd always add someone else in the mix.

You know what I mean? And one night we were there leaving Del Frisco's, and we were all hanging out, just kind of talking and Keith Robinson farted. And it fucked up the night, like it ruined the night. But he only farted out a half his ass. No, this is before the stroke. Oh. This is a full filling tube. This is a, this is a, this is a, I just date everything that Delphi is goes and a fucking Tomahawk steak. So just, just milk, milk fart, like milk steak fart, just terrible. And it fucking made other tables were really insulted. Like we had to leave Delphi's calls.

It was fucking atrocious. So yes, we was Sarah and I just as as most people know at this point, Sarah and I just shot a huge NYU student film this weekend. Big blockbuster. This thing is great. I've heard about that. That there's a buzz on West Fourth. Yeah, it's the talk in the town.

But there was a scene where they had to film a close-up of people laughing and they got the crew to do it. Because you can't afford extras. So we had the crew and then one of the women, she was like a woman got the crew to do it because you can't afford extras. So we had the crew and then one of the women, she was like a woman on the crew and she said, we need you to fake laugh and she said, well, someone's got to make me laugh. And so I just ripped a fart like a... And all the guys on the crew started dying laughing, Sarah looked a little embarrassed, but the director and the other guy there was laughing. I thought it was hilarious, but it bombed with all the women. Yeah, I, I, I, I, it is a thing.

I mean, look, let's be honest, women aren't funny. Um, they really, they're just dead inside. I mean, they, yeah, I mean, let's be honest. Well, it's true. Women don't really fart in front of each other, but only the cool ones do. A lady fart is just, it's a double standard. A lady fart is not funny. I'm sorry.

Unless you're big fat, a big fat woman farting, it's funny. Like if like Melissa McCarthy throws her ankles over her heads and rips a fart, that's funny. But like, Sarah farting just isn't funny. Yeah. From our queens, that's funny, but like Sarah farting just isn't funny. Yeah Weafs that's funny Please make me throw up I know I don't care that they don't smell they sound like they smell They sound like they smell like just old clams like

I I hate queifs. I've never liked a quif. It's made me, it's made me anytime it's happened. I've always just wanted to immediately stop sex and like wait for her pussy to reset or do something. Yes, I'm just you can't stop it. You got to blow in her mouth because that blow is the pussy out. Sometimes when I fart, I go, oh, sorry, I just quieved. Everybody thinks my pussy smells like shit. But which it does, by the way. That's

because she wipes from the back forward. That's true. She keeps piling shit and we're pussy. Sarah didn't fart in front of me for years. It was like four years we were together and then she squatted like a catcher Like fucking rich getman and it just went And she was so embarrassed and then after that it was like the floodgates open The park gates open. Why are you where you see Colton Fisk? Because it was a mediocre crouch. It wasn't a great crouch Yeah, dude, I don't I don't I don't even like I don't like I get mad at Don when she if she takes a poop and there's a little like a little skid like she doesn't she needs I go you need to look back. I go you poo you need to look

back like you're a serial killer. Like you just murdered somebody. She just moves on. Well, she's usually great with that, but it's like, honey, I can't, I can't do that. I can't, I, because now I'm going to have to go piss that off. Oh, absolutely mortifying. I wrote this one job. I worked out within one week. They had, you know, New York just has week restrooms.

So I would use, it's in a room where we all share one room and the only bathroom is like three feet away from everybody and I really had to go and I just stopped up the whole toilet. I was like, I had to leave. I felt like I had to quit my job. That's my girl. Yeah. I had to leave. I felt like I had to quit my job. That's my girl.

You owner. Yeah, dude. I, uh, yeah, I don't like, I don't like, I don't look at, I laugh last night after, of course, because I'm funny. I have a sense of humor. Yeah. And I didn't, I was so oblivious that it was a fart. I couldn't imagine her farting. And I couldn't imagine my wife's ass smelling like that. I mean, I eat, when I went to the bathroom today, and I never know when Don goes. She just goes and it's like when she's gonna go sneak a cigarette when she takes a shit.

We know one of her notes. But it was mom, I don't know. I think she's well in the back. Walk of the dog. And it puff it on a polymer and 100 or a fucking pinching out of love somewhere, right? But I had to go pee today right after her. And I had to walk into that heat. And I hate the heat.

I probably hate the heat more than if the dump was in the toilet. Just walking into just hot smell that was just fresh. And I'm just just unbelievable. Yeah, well, yeah. I mean, but there's gonna be a day where I'm gonna have to wipe her ass. I mean, yeah, maybe. Well, if we live long enough, if we live till our 80s, 90s, there's going to be a day

where she's just going to be shitting in the chair and I'm going to have to, unless I make enough money work and hire, you know, an old Haitian lady to do it, other than that, it's going to be me cleaning up her fucking costumey bags. So I better get used to it, I guess, right? Yeah, I think so. One time, listen to this, this is crazy, and Sarah's going to deny this, but one time we were making love and I was holding her ankles and I could see like half a shit sticking out of her ass I'm gonna fuck you. I gotta that is not true

No, that's not true No, that's I was in a rush. There's something really funny though about saying guys just a heads up she's gonna deny this, but I think Bobby quit. He turned his camera off. He might be throwing it up right now. I can't fucking do this guy. No, I'm never gone back. I'm never going to look at sad. I'm always going to hear what's up. And that's going to just the tail sticking out of her ass is going to be in my head. I'm totally kidding. It's a joke. Well, I have that joke in my act about dawn when I never told

to this until years after when she saw me do the joke. When she was given birth, I saw that as Max was coming out, so was whatever she ate for lunch two days ago. And I fucking almost quit. I almost left and I almost left the hospital and became like Bill Bipsby and just grabbed a nap that and went to the little little tunnel. Ben, ben, ben, ben, ben, ben, ben,

because I was like, I might just leave this family that I've created because I don't know if I'm coming back from this. You know what? Yeah, they don't come back to childbirth videos. No, they do the ones, they do the ones in the fucking turtle tubs, those fucking those those God damn those broads with shave sides of the heads who who just should have baby out in a

fucking living room. But there's just shootout. That's all. And then they have to empty. There's someone has to empty that tub water, which is f**king gross. They have to just funnel it out a window and Brooklyn off a second floor.

They just brought one of the f**king, she wanted to give birth like a caveman, f**k her. You probably dreamt it for the nutrients. Eh. Eh. B**k. Oh. Yeah, this is a gross pot. I'm glad to hear Max finally came out. That's really I'm proud of him. What are you talking about? You said Max came out.

He's a little young, but that's really special. No, Max did Max did not come out. Max is Max is not gay and I I've I've had a couple instances where he's like, yeah, dude, that's what girls do. You know, because I've had a couple instances where he's like, yeah, dude, that's what girls do. You know, because I'm like, dude, you want a Barbie? I don't care. He goes, no, there's a for girls. And I was like, I was like, all right, cool. Thank you. Great.

You know what I mean? But I got to stop right there because he did buy a journal today. So you journal's nice. Sarah and I were watching a gay British movie last night and it's pretty vulgar. Pretty steamy. What are you talking about? A gay British movie?

What do you mean? If we broke back Mountain but set in Wales. We lost Bobby. No, that's a very nice place. No, that's a very nice place. I was just thinking the Wales is beautiful. We went there for a week last year. It was the best trip ever. We didn't get to have any

steamy gay sex, though. Let me ask you a question. So you watch a gay movie and it was two gay guys or two gay women. Or was it gay everybody? Two gay guys. So two gay guys, now you watch this movie, why would you watch is it an English movie? Is it an American movie? What is it? It's an English movie. I follow all these, you know, I'm a big film con. So I follow all these Instagram, you know, uh, cinephile and, you know, films, cinema bullshit. And it was like a poster and it said all these five star mesmerizing spellbinding the best directorial debut whatever and I was like oh this is a movie we love broke back we love strangers by the lake behind Sarah there which is like a porn movie

basically and you know so I thought let's watch this but some of these movies this it gets vulgar now because you got to keep one up it so this is like hard core missionary gay sex. Well, I mean, broke back mountain was pretty fucking vulgar. He's spitting his dirty sheep hand and stuck a unshoured fucking log into a guy's fucking, I've been shitting outside asshole for a month. I mean, that's, that's as fucking vulgar as you get.

I mean, gee, even gay's as fucking vulgar as you get. I mean, gee, even gay guys are like, yucky. This goes, this goes pretty far. The one. Really? As this one, that's just a gay porn with an amazing plot. Aren't all gay points like that? No, I think some of the ones I watch, it's just straight into 69ing. I've heard about. We just find out Joe's cinephile Instagram accounts are just gay porn film. Yeah, they're just like cruise sites and I pretend to do some files.

I really into film. Joe's a pillow on his lap the whole time. But it's like that's like Keith's watching a rape scene. He's kind of just keep a pillow on his lap the whole time. That's like Keith, that's like Keith watching a rape scene. He's gonna just keep a pillow on his lap. But broke back is like, there's one sex scene and they're fighting and they spit on his hand and it goes off camera. This is like you see bear ass slapping against bear ass.

So that you think now, I may ask you a question because I always wonder this in regular movies, do you think these guys are actually tagging each other in the fucking butt? That's a good question, Sarah. I don't think so. Well here's why I just read, there's a movie that came out years ago with Vincent Gallow and um, Broadway. He's called the money. She actually performed Felatio and it ruined her career and I feel like they don't so they don't actually

didn't know her career. Well, she got dropped by her agent after that. She got dropped by her agent. Yeah, I mean, I'm sure I'm sure that agent. Yeah, I'm sure after he's done jerking off to it, he dumped her. But listen, yeah, no, she actually was on that polygamy show after that. Yeah. And she's a, she's an independent, she's an independent, you know, moviemaking girl. I mean, she's just stays in that, that genre with that guy. There's a whole, that whole independent film thing. You can make a lot of money in that

world. You think it's not, but they make good money. And then they dip into roles. You know what I mean? She's one of my favorite actresses. She was at Louis house once. I remember the barbecue with Max when he fell and you guys just looked at him. I was like, hey, Bob, you get felt. Remember that? Yeah. Yeah. that was hilarious. Yeah, when we learn that you guys don't like kids, um, well, he was in love with Katie. Can again. Why wouldn't he? But she looks his age.

Um, so, uh, that didn't even say that correct, but it worked. Um, so she came, she was coming in the kitchen. I, you know, Louis house, the kitchen area that from the outside to the insides, that little small area, she was coming out and I was going in. And she stopped and she's stunning. Yeah. She's beautiful.

Who is this again? Chloe, I never know how to pronounce her last name, but she's like an indeed darling. And I've, she was in the movie Kids, and then her career's been pretty intense. She was in Zodiac. Yes. Yes, Zodiac, she's good.

In American Psycho. She's doing a lot of stuff. She does a lot of crazy stuff, but she's always great. And she was coming in the kitchen, I was going out and she just stood and looked at me. And she bitched me back out. Like, I just backed out. And it was totally my right away.

Like, I was already three feet into the kitchen. She was a half a foot to where she was. So I had right away, I'm bigger. You know, I'm a man, which I should have more rights. And she bitch me, I just, I was like, hey, and I just backed out and I bumped into shit and I was like, sorry, and she just walked through me. And didn't even say thank you.

She just walked right up to like, fucking some other famous person. I was just like, hey, she's, but she's stunning. She's beautiful, but she really did below this guy on camera. And he came too. And it was just a point scene. I mean, it's a fucking point scene. Yeah.

Yeah. I'm gonna go boot at cans. Yeah, because she's sucking his dick and he came. I mean, if they didn't let, if he didn't, if they could have just panned away at the fucking money shot, yeah, yeah, it might have gone away with it. You know what I mean?

Cause you'd be like, oh, that's a fake cock. Cause he has a nice piece. I know. I'm gonna see you. Oh, no, we can't, we can't be fuckable. I'm like, I'm definitely winning the Oscar with this. And instead your agent leaves you. Well, she is, she is an alien.

She's an alien. I mean, she is just sexy. Strangers by the lake there for sure blowing each other. I mean, they show them blowing each other and then they come. So this movie looked pretty real. I mean, if they're not, I don't know, I don't know how you would act and not get a heart on in those situations. I mean, the gay sex particularly.

I don't know. Have you ever seen blue as the warmest color? That's a lesbian movie. And that's got like a seven minute love making scene in it. And it's so where you're like, I think they're actually fucking each other. Yeah, they always say they're not. I think it's like the steroid thing where they're like, no,

I'm just eating chicken and broccoli and working, you know, hard every day. And it's like, fuck the rock is juicing. Chris howling's worth that Indian dude, that Indian dude went from a fucking nerd with no. Oh, yeah. Yeah, they're all on fuck. And my friend Joe was telling me all the shit they're on. They just juice.

They go on a cycle. They do it with a doctor and they get shredded in two months. And then they say it's just dedication. Just waking up every day and five. You're kidding me. Yeah, fuck you. You went from a fucking internet hacker body to a fucking superhero in a month and a half.

Yeah, so Indian. Just to shape that Indian, I've never seen an in shape Indian person in my life. It feels like usually they're like, um, like yoga bodies. Yeah, it's they're in shape, but it's not, it's a shape. It's not inch, you know, it's not, yeah, it's not abs. Um, but I think the sex thing is the same thing. I think it's a, look, I'm going to eat your pussy. I'm going to suck your dick and I'm going to stick in your ass a little bit.

I'm a rub, I'm going to rub my cock along your pussy shaft and it might go in. con bolotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Spectacularismos, lincones de película y un sincindia aventuras te esperan. ¡Fliparás! Huelades de madrida murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea. Tarifa sujeta a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. So this is from Stranger on the Lake. Yeah, Stranger by the Lake. Yeah, yeah, that's it. And yeah, it looks like he's inside him and it's just a silhouette. Yeah. No, that one's hardcore.

You guys gotta watch that movie. It's pretty good. Bobby, you love it. I love it. If you're not, I have no problem with watching that stuff. It doesn't, it doesn't even affect me. I can watch gay porn. I've seen

gay porn. To me, it's, there's, you know, there's one thing about gay porn is, I think in a movie, it's a little better. Real gay porn. It's just, just the way guys would suck dick. Just fucking, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he's no, there's no looking up and like, me lullipop in it like I don't like a look up. It's too I don't like eye contact at the bank let alone during a blowjob I you fuck your head down head down We blow people like Jackie oh yeah, Sarah's the Ray Charles of blowjob and then when when I put them down, just be like, good, huh? Then I put it back up. You do this, you push it back up.

Yeah. You like that, huh? It's fucking, I suck that good, huh? I contact is weird. I love, I need eye contact. I need to know you're around. I need to know you're into it. If I don't get eye contact. I feel fucked up.

I feel like it's just this, you're like you're just doing it to get rid of me. You know how you tell me? Uh-huh. Yeah. Ha ha ha ha. I did, I did have believe it or not. I had a love making scene

in a TV show where I had to have sex with my wife. And I had to wear, I had to wear that thing over your peepie. It's like a nylon over your dick and balls. Yeah, I have one right now. And what show sex, love and rock and roll? No, no, no, no, no, no. Peace, love and rock and roll? No, no, no, no, no. Peace, love and rock and roll. What was it?

What was it? Brock Swarnes. Yeah, Brock Swarnes. So we were actually, you know, she was on top of me grinding. My dick went inside. My dick got nervous. My dick literally left the outside world

and went inside my body and was like hiding out. And I was so embarrassed. I almost wanted to fluff it a little bit because I know she was on top of me not feeling a bulge. But she wasn't feeling my peka. Well you're being pretty. Well here's the thing is that I should have been hard. I should like she was on top of me grinding and I should have been like I'm sorry. Like I was all set to be hey I, I just wanna say, I apologize, I didn't mean for this to happen.

But my dick was like, dude, I'm out. I'm not into this. How do you do a love making scene in the era of the Me Too movement? I don't understand how you would even do that. I don't know if you can. And there's fewer of them outside of the game movies, of course, which is there's no me too movement in the gay scene evidently.

What do you mean? I mean, you can have sex with a woman on camera. Yeah, but you don't really love making scenes that often on any films, and you remember in the 80s, they always guarantee like one 10 minute love making scene with the montage. Yeah.

Doom doom doom do with the montage. Yeah. Exactly. We don't forget that women are still horrors. I mean, what? Dude, what are you talking about? Women are, women are still fucking want to be choked in their hair pulled and they still want you to fucking tell them to do shit and women still like that shit. They just want to be awake. You know what I mean? They want to be awake and they don't want to have to do it to get a job.

That's pretty much it. You know what I'm saying? But it's tricky to do it in a movie setting, I feel like, in showbiz these days. I don't think so, dude. I think women who actually actresses are very sexual people. You know, I think the whole showbiz thing is a sexual industry.

And just because, you know, there's not producers doing casting couches anymore, you know. You, I think that, you know, people still, when you see, when you walk on the set and see another actor or actress that's smoking hot, I mean, most of these people, the top 10 people in the world look wise. Why would they not want to fucking suck face? You know? And they get to rehearse back

in their fucking their hotel. Hey, when it come up in rehearse. And then they just start making out. I mean, I did that in acting class all the time. Every girl I ever had a scene with, we wound up fucking around. Do you have the number of any of those acting schools? Uh, a fecali. Fecali, another Harrison project? No. Oh, dude, every girl I ever did a scene with we wound up

kind of messing around. Or I'll say this, there was tension, like sexual tension in the air. Oh yeah, dude, I remember there was this one girl. She had to be like, fucking 280, Italian girl. And I got a scene with her and we were supposed to, you know, we were just breaking up or something like that and she was like, come on my house. And I walked in, she baked me a fucking eggplant palm.

She had fucking pasta, a dollar bread. Two hours. And then I was talking to her, I was joking her. We were doing the scene, we were eating. That was it. I was, it was it for hours. And we were finally doing the scene. And I said, I had a fucking earring through through my cock Just joking around she goes show me

I got now I can't show you and she just undid my pants and took my my packer out. Oh, fun Yeah, it was great fucking added to the scene in the next week Acting did you have an earring in your cock? No, I just fucking lied so she won't see my cock. Yeah cock. No, I just fucking lied so she won't see my cock. Yeah, that's right. I'm gonna look. Girls could, I don't know if I could, I think on a scene like that, like an independent movie like that, dude, it's probably a very small set, it's probably a camera in the director and those guys probably went to town.

Yeah, I think so. I think so. Yeah, and that's a different thing. That's like, this is the gay sex movie. And I think that's more edgy and progressive. I think we did the heterosexual thing on camera already. What do you mean? I'm saying like, now a day, it's like, that was the 80.

We did that throughout the 70s and 80s naked. It's like now to be to push the envelope. You have to have two guys really fucking hardcore. If you just have an actress fucking, it's like, oh, what is this? Some old bullshit we used to hack. Exactly. Now you're going to have two men. There's tons of lesbian period dramas in the last few years.

Like SNL just didn't sketch about it with how many, it's so many of them that they have tropes now. Absolutely. They had the lesbians with the appearance. How disgusting. Down it. Fortunately, the lady on fire was great. Oh, we love that movie. Yeah, it was spicy. It's funny too, because if you do look back at the 80s, it was just a, the 80s and 90s was just tits and ass. Like every movie had to have some chick, I mean, for nothing, just some Blancheke with a headband going, woo, and her tits shaking

and like, you know, I mean, porkeys, last American virgin, our men in the nerds. Revenge of the nerds. Every movie had TNA. Every horror movie had the hot chick that would be banging and her tits would be out. 70s too.

We watch all these foreign films, Sarah, and I got really into foreign films during pandemic. And they have tits just like, like they're hanging out. Like, like like they're sitting on the couch watching TV is just like that posture and their tits are hanging out. Yeah, but that's like that. Yeah, the foreign tits aren't fucking sexy. Let's be honest. Yeah, point. It's always point. 1980, 1980, early 90s, American tits, California, American tits, were probably the best tits of all of any year.

80s, 90s tits, American titty movies, holy shit, come on. I'll put those tits up against any tits ever. Yeah, those some weird tits, the first tits I ever saw on film or anywhere was in the godfather, Apollonia, and she had weird tits. Her nipples and skin is the same color, which is a very off putting. I need a different tone on the nipple. I agree with those 70 tits being weird. I have an example right here, one of those 10% to us.

Also, they always had tan lines. Oh, I. Yeah, this is this is why Louis is fucking nuts. Okay. This is why Louis. He's fucking nuts. First of all, I look good in that compared to what I do now. All right. I have a picture of I'm gonna share I have a picture of my tits. I was lying. I was oh, this is how bad it is. I'm trying, I gotta lose weight. I was lying down the other day and I saw my tits. I was on FaceTime. I saw my tits.

I was shirtless. My tits look like an in-shape guy's ass and just a little bit of his balls. You know that you don't even know him. Okay, I'll show you. You're right here you go. You'll fucking see what I'm saying. This is fucking nuts.

This looks like my, these are. Yeah. Oh wow, that doesn't like ass and balls. That looks like a nice guy. Like an in-shape guy's ass and then just this little fucking nuts right there. Those are my tits and my chin. Oh God, anyways.

Yeah, I think the first titties I saw were volcano titties on TV, which were gross. You know, the volcano, they just come out and then like it looks like a little volcano. Looks like somebody sucked their nipples, their titties up with a straw. I like Sarah, Sarah and the chat is mentioning Christine Brickley, but I thought Beverly DeAngelo's tits in vacation were just mind blowing. And she was smoking up. People like Jamie Lee Curtis's tits from creating faces.

Those are well. If he became fast times at Ridgemont, how fast times forget it? It's not even we're talking about fast. I feel like we're going to end up divorced if we talk about it fast times. The I'll take it right now. The just one of the guys is the best. Just one of the guys ever ever on TV. First of all, she was just as a guy,

which made it even hotter because every guy was like, oh my god, there's just a hot dude with tits in a tuxedo, the best tits ever. I don't know if you can show them. Can we show them? They've got to be a blurred out version. I mean, I don't. That is have to, it is, she has the best hit ever. I've up on that one. That was, that was back when you had to, when you, that movie came on, you had to get prepared because there was no Tivo. There was no, it wasn't going to be on again. It had to be like, it's what Joe was talking about. You know what I mean? What's Joe's example? Is that Beverly D'Angelo? Yeah, it's Beverly D'Angelo. She's she's not and hilarious too. She's everything you want Yeah, she's hot except for a teeth her teeth her she has a massive overbite. I just don't think teeth are that important personally

Well, I know I understand why So you you're hiding them with a microphone. But listen, the, uh, I, dude, yeah, I eighties tits were the best. Eighties, nineties, early nineties tits, the best. Yeah. And then they got too implanty that it looked like they were hurting the girls. Yeah. You're right. They went too much. Like Vaney and the Nipple was too spread out or something weird. Yeah, they would do something like raise their arms and it was just fucking some weird thing.

And like fucking breach of Tim Markler would happen. You're like, oh my God, or Titt's gonna die. Yeah, that scene that Mike pulled up with fucking on the Louis show, I got another scene, rehearsed it and showed up and Louis sitting on the couch in between, you know, ready to shoot and he just goes, yeah, I don't want to shoot this scene. And he goes, how long will it take you to learn a scene? I was like, I don't know, when he pages, he goes like four pages. I go 15 minutes and he has a key,

he had a thing around his neck and he stuck in his computer and he just printed out. He goes, you might be in like kind of naked. And I was just like, I don't know what's happening. Like, what are you asking me? I'm like, and I was like, I don't give a fuck. And I went to the other room and I just got, so the towel they had,

they had to like make because, you know, I'm too chubby. It wouldn't fucking wrap around me and stay on. So she had to like sew it together. And then I had to come out in front of everybody like with just a towel on and run the scene with him. It was the fucking craziest thing ever. You should have been in the Times article. Yeah, I think you got, I think you got taken advantage of. Yeah. I found an example. It's kind of grainy. I'll blur it out for the

YouTube version. Yeah. Whoa. I mean, dude, the best. It looks like Ralph Machio with tits. I mean, you can't get better than that. So you could show tits on patreon My That you don't know Yeah, I think you can write stuff in the description, but you can probably show it's like they're not gonna look for that Well with life we'll blur it we blur it out. Much. We'll go in and blur it out

Yeah, you know the people that don't pay don't get tits. They don't get a tip Patreon tier. I do. I showed them my tits for $25. I said them that picture of my tits. It looks like a guy's ass. it looks like a guy's ass. Um, you know, my wife got fake titties. Joe, you know, boy, right? Yeah, I think I remember hearing that. Yeah. Yeah, I read it in the blogs. What?

Yeah, I read it in the blog. Yeah. What blog? I read it on Reddit. Oh, Joe writes a blog. I blog about podcasts, wives. Um, no, I think I remember you talking about it. I blog about podcasts wives. No, I think I remember you talking about it. Yeah, that was the best acting I've ever done

when she came home. And she was like, I'm thinking again, I'm thinking to get my breasts implants. And I was like, no, why would you do that? She's like, well, you don't think I should. I go, of course not. Why would you? I love how the left one is bigger than the right one. And the left nipple looks like a fucking

smushed hamburger on the, the right one looks like a Filipino boy nipple. Why would you fix that? Was this after Matt? No, well, no, she got it before Max. She was working for a doctor in Manhattan who was actually one of the best breast augmentation guys in New York. All the penthouse pets used to go to him, all the strippers, but he had a problem that he developed where he always got the girls to go bigger than they wanted to go. And he wound up making girls go too big. And what happened was the nipples were falling off. Because when you go too big, because they have to take the nipple off and then they put it back on. And the breast was too

big. So it wouldn't, it wouldn't connect again. It was like pieces of it. So this girl's walking around with no nipples now Because this fucking guy he actually got sued and he tried to get he was the best though. He did a great job And I guess Dom was doing laser hair removal and he was like, hey, if I gotta go on vacation I need my back laser'd. I'll give you I'll give you $10,000 titty's for free If you hit my back, you know what I mean, five times, which is a big job, you know what I mean? Yeah.

And so she was like, I was like, you know, you get in there and fucking get that fucking Jewish guy hairless, you get him right for this fucking. And she did, she had to pay for the anesthesiologist to let her fuck us, that's it, like a thousand bucks. And she did a great job, but he tried to get her to go big too. And she was like, no, I just want regular

whatever the fuck she got. But after Max, they kinda, he did a great job. I gotta, I mean, they had a little, you know, a little sag to him. They didn't have any of those weird things or there was no scarring. Yeah. It went through the nipple, you know, the, so he did,

he was a master at, her tits are great. I love Don's titties, but after Max, you know, you know, Max kind of fucked him up a little bit. So Max owes me, you know, what did he do? He did. Through the tits, all you means like chewing on them. What's that? No, no, no. She Max owes me, you know, you know, the tips are you means like chewing on them. What's that? No, no, no. Oh, she never she I remember she didn't she tried to

breastfeed she breastfed for a week and a half. And then it was the middle of the night. And she's crying. She can't get milk out of her tit. I'm sitting there holding pumps on her tits. And there's just it looked like her tits were crying. You know, just coming out. And I was crying, you know, just a drip coming out. And I was like, we just, I'm going to get formula. I'm not doing this. Yeah. He had breast milk for a week. It's not, every kid gets formula. I'm not doing this. You're crying. The baby's hungry. Your tits aren't fucking working right right now. This is stupid. And I just went to CVS or whatever, the Dwayne Reed. And I got Al to CVS or whatever the Dwayne read. And I got Aluminium, whatever

the fuck formula it was. And he's been, he just did that way. But yeah, breastfeeding is a nightmare. A nightmare. A woman actually. I don't get weird that your tits are like sexual. And then the next thing you know, they're defeat somebody. What a complete 180. What if anyone's ever had like the husband eating the pussy while the baby eats the tits. That would be something. I'm going to throw up. I'm just going to throw up. I just think that would be fun. Dude, you can't the babies remember everything, even if they don't remember it. No, but he's not looking. He's looking straight ahead sucking on. Yeah. And then you're down there munching up some box. I think this is decent.

First of all, you don't wanna be down on a box that just had a baby. Trust me, every pussy that just gave birth looks like foster Brooks. It's terrible. Terrible. From Bob and the Chats that he's done it. He's an alcoholic, okay?

So am I. Yeah, No, he's not recovering. He's out there. He's still he's still out there. Yeah, I mean, he could pass out in the middle of it. You not remember anything. Michael, do you have a photo? You might start the pop. I'm talking about nipples falling off. And because of Instagram's rules, this woman did this. Oh, cool. So, yeah, no nipples. Can we do this on Instagram?

What if you put a male nipple on top of your female nipple? Does that make it safe? Oh, the kids. You can get a male nipple on that make it safe? Could you get a male nipple on Instagram? Like you could be shirtless. Yes. So it's the female nipple you can't have. So why can't you just put a man nipple on top of it? I don't know why America has this crazy fucked up

weird thing with pets. I mean, it nowhere else in the world do they really care. Well, I guess in certain places, fucking Saudi Arabia, they give a shit. But listen, you can't show up on mouth. You can't bury your up short neck and throw rocks at her fucking pits. But yes, I, but in America, we have some weird thing with cities. I mean, and it's embedded in us. I went to Aruba and we stayed at this one. Aruba. Aruba.

Aruba. That was nice. I love Aruba. We stay at this place that had a private beach, the Renaissance Hotel. And they have two private beaches you have to take a boat to. And when you get there, there's a topless beach and there's the regular beach. And we went to the topless beach one day, we didn't know as topless.

It was just a smoke and Dutch woman with her fucking natural Dutch cans hanging out. And I, I couldn't, I was just so fucking giddy. And at one point, I'm like, why am I acting this way? Like why am I, why do I just wanna go look at her tits? It was just like, it was amazing to you. I'm not sure. Yeah, but it's just tits after a minute, you know what I mean? Yeah.

It's just tits. I don't know, I love tits. I still get excited to see tits every night. They're the best. You're excited to see tits every night. They're the best. Your Sarah's tits Yeah, of course I'm gonna say you open up that closet door behind Joe and it's just tons of like playboy tits. Yeah Like a fire man locker room. It's like bouncing everywhere.

No, she's great. I love tits. I mean, I mean, it's not my, I don't care, but I'm just saying that we have a really crazy thing with nudity and America like, you know, that's what I mean. You're up there. There's just just tits Willie nilly. They're everywhere. Yeah, and dick still They don't care about dicks and they don't give a shit about dicks side boobs great Also isn't it exciting when you go to Central Park and one lady Decides to go topless Isn't that so wild and when you see that and you're like good for her Yeah, first time I ever saw it. I was with Mateo Lane and and it was such a bummer, because I was with a gay person. I was like, oh my God! And he's like, girl, get those fixed,

or whatever it was. And I was like, I feel like I couldn't really properly enjoy it, because I was with a gay. What do you say, get them fixed? No, I don't know. He said something, but he was like, we were a critical, I mean, they weren't great tits. It looked like my cousin Jeff walking by shirtless, but

still it was tits. And it was, it was a thrill. I mean, you just, you want to see tits? It's it. Yeah, it's never, it's never awesome tits in New York that they whip out. It's always like a tit with hair around the nipple, you know, name him. Same with Key West. Really. Yeah, you go to Garden of Eden, that topless bar, and it's just like a bag of old catchersmits, but you never see like a hot, hot lady topless on one of those bars. Do you have to be, so it's a topless bar? Do you have to be naked too? Do you have to have to?

It's a, it's clothing optional. Yeah, but here's the thing with that, is I don't want to sit on a stool or a chair that somebody just sat on bear ass because your asshole opens up in the chair. My asshole opens up all the time just randomly, but you know, you can wear shorts. You can wear shorts and be topply. It's closing optional. So you can wear whatever you want. You can put a napkin down, a cocktail napkin or an asshole.

Well, if you sit on a chair that some old bag was just sitting on and then you get up and your shorts have just old lady shit stains on them because her pussy juice and ass juice has been mixing in her fucking chair for an hour while she's having mugger readers. Ugh. It's just your ass. We got old your pussy dries up so you're not really like leaving a train. Oh, it does. Yeah. All right, maybe those my wife's pussy I heard last night.

Just the drive far. What a fucking show. This has been Sarah. You have a Side boob is fucking great. I love. I think I like under boob. What is underneath the Oh, oh, when, yeah, no, that's 62. From back back in the 80s again, when they used to wear the, yeah, yeah, wear the shirts, the half shirts. Yeah.

Yeah, that's hot. And I do like fucking tan lines. I love a tan line. I like boob sweat. You lick that bottom thing where it's all wet and drippy. I'm gonna throw up. You know, you swipe your finger along in the summer, and then you just take a little titswet off.

What are you guys doing? I just live in my life, man. So is this putting heat on my tits? Yeah. I put the humidifier over her nipples when she's sleeping. I just live in my life, man. So this is putting heat on my tits. Yeah. I put the humidifier over her nipples when she's sleeping. Yeah.

Oh. But you're going to mention, now, is special. Sharers get a special coming out. When is this happening? What's happening? Tell us. Oh, Jesus. Oh, yeah.

It's been over a week. It's been over a week. It's on YouTube. All right. Sharers, one of the funny, I's been out for a week. It's been out for a week. It's on YouTube. It's on YouTube. Sarah's one of the funny. I've said this all the time. Sarah, you're one of the funniest people I fucking know. Your standup is so original and hilarious. I mean, I just, I fucking love, I love watching your stuff.

So it's on YouTube right now. What's it called? The Lepsh was boy. The Lepsh was boy. What are you guys gonna stop watching these game movies? What the fuck? I mean watching American movie for once. You fucking weirdos. It's up. Why what's it got like almost 20,000 views in a week? Yeah, it's a yeah, it's a 20 or eight like near 19,000 right now. week. Yeah, it's a, yeah, it's a 20th or eight like near 19,000 right now. Aaron just said Farts, queues, poop, moving sex tits. Let's do plugs.

But plugs. It's got a very solid point. Here it is right here. Now now can we see a little bit of it? Saturday, you're gonna be fine. Come on, hit the button. Oh, this is awful. No mush, all right. Well, mush, I guess doesn't listen anymore. Thank you, no one's like it. Get into a good part. Good further down. Go right to the end when she says good night.

That's it. Hi. All right, whatever. Mush will pull it up when he gets it up. Yeah, that's great. I mean, you've had a great year, whatever. Wish we'll pull it up when he gets it up. Yeah, that's great. I mean, you've had a great year, Sarah. Don't you think in this pandemic, you've had an album, you got a special, you got all kinds of stuff,

doing all kinds of skits? Yeah, I was kind of done. I like, I like, I like, what's that? I like making videos. You really do, and you do great videos. Your, this is when I learned how fun you were because I started watching your videos that you were making. I was cracking up. I kept awake. I was waking my wife up and you got to watch this. You got to watch this video. You're

makeup videos were the best. I don't know why you stopped. I ran out of ideas. I don't know why you stopped. I ran out of ideas. Oh, just put mayonnaise on your face. I mean, it was so funny because everything on the internet was this mush. What is that? You covered Sarah's face, right, the middle of me talking to her. What was it mush?

What did you put up? OK. Oh, that's nice. Put it on anytime. Okay. The guy's saying anytime he feels sad or happy, he puts it on. I know, but you don't interrupt my story by covering Sarah's face with the con. Put that up right at the end. I mean, we got it. Have some timing, Mushy. I've been mushed. It's okay. I forget what I was saying now. Fuck, I had a good point for you.

Oh, you got to do those videos. Because you, you, that was all that was on fucking Instagram at the point. Every time I turned someone, there was someone putting makeup on, somebody teaching somebody how to do this and that. And all of a sudden I turned, I'm like, no, not Sarah. And then I think you've got a marker and just drew eyebrows in. And I'm like, what the fuck? It floored me. Fucking floored me. So, good for you. Oh, come on.

It's always good. This is going great, guys. I'm really happy with this. That's how you, that's how you know a professional is when they call out what they're doing the whole time. Oh, wow, I'm great. Great clip. I tried to do shows like one time I did this show and this guy came up to me afterwards and he was like, can I be brutally honest with you and I was like, no, thank you.

I was like, that was close. I almost got my feelings hurt. Oh, same on my back like an adult, you know. All right, that's it. That was great. Second clip was great. I like the clip that you pulled up as a sip of water. I did it all the time. No, it's hard because you watch yourself and then you're like, oh no, you just realized some of your bad habits sometimes. That was that was my fault. I told Moose to do that on the fly. We should have had a clip.

Right. I was just like, most, and I know poor Moose was sweating and panicking, trying to listen to a clip without it playing in the background. I'm sorry, Moose. So I've put you in that position. You're a fucking shitty producer. Listen, I'm kidding. Moosh. So I've put you in that position you're talking shitty producer. Listen, I'm kidding. I'm a Moosh, not a fan.

Well, that's great. Now you shot the set in New York comedy club? Yeah, I did it last year before pandemic hit. Is it a one camera shoot? Yeah, it's a one camera. I didn't win any fancy cranes or drone shots. One shot. Yeah, why would you do that? Have any of the same thing? What's now is it the same as your hour that you your CD? Yeah. Yeah. Well listen, it's unbelievable. Go check it out and do me a favor.

Like it, comment, and share it, and subscribe to it. That's how you get here on the algorithm. The way you do it is if you see this, go there, watch it, and like it it and comment and then it gets out there and more people see it. Unfortunately that's the way it works. You got to you got to it's up to you guys if you guys not unfortunately but it's up to you guys to make it happen. So please go check it out one of the funniest people ever. We're gonna do was starting right now. We're gonna give a little plugs. That is the first half of YQWD. You know what dude? We're gonna go into the Patreon. That is the first half of YKWD. You know what, dude? We're gonna go into the Patreon extra 10, 15, 20,

whatever it winds up being. It does go. Right now for Patreon members only. So if you want to watch the next, we've got some new stories. I got some movies. We've got a couple things to bring up for Joe and Sarah. We know Joe is a fucking movie snob

and we know Sarah is too, they're just snobbs. So we're gonna talk about the Oscars coming up on patreononlypatreon.com and we're gonna be reading out the names. We get around, I don't know, 15 new members. We're gonna be shouting your names out. So thanks for joining. Remember, next month, we have Erie Spears coming on.

We have another special guest coming on. So next month, we have Erie Spears coming on. We have another special guest coming on. So next month, this month was crazy. Tim Dillon and her show Joe and Sarah crazy. Next month's going to be crazier. Make sure you sign up patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. Joe, where are you going to be? Paramount theater in Austin, Tejas, may be with. 15th, I'm with myself, God damn it. Some local dick is gonna open, but Paramount theater, May 15th, come get tickets. I cannot fill a theater unless you guys come

on my face. You have your special opener. Special opener coming. It's gonna sell 900 tickets. No, I, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Tampa everybody was saying Louis funny, but you came out and fucking crushed it after him. That's true. I am not as funny, but you did good. Yeah, I did well, just something. Everybody was like, Joe fucking annihilated.

They were saying it like, dude, Joe, like they didn't expect you to come out and crush after, after Louis, because he killed it. Of course, Louis always kills, but you crushed it. So that's not true. So you're going to be there by yourself. How many, what's the capacity? Is it full capacity? I don't think so.

I don't know. I hope not. I think it's like half capacity. Yeah. I think Texas is full capacity now. Shut up, Sarah. It's 10% capacity. Good luck selling.

Fuck a thousand seats. Listen, I only sell 60 tickets max 60s of sellout they said No, I don't know what it is. I have no idea, but I'm gonna be there and then Kansas City and Des Moines in in June I gotta get my dates up, but Austin's the big one so come travel for it come down and check it out Make sure you check out Joe list at the Paramount Theater. He is one of the

funniest fuckers going right now. He is a K the truth. And I love them to death. Sarah, where are you going to be? Whoops. No, where? Oh, I'm a scared Roya with Adrian Royalsford, Pennsylvania. Oh, that's going to be a fucking killer show. Oh my god. Adrian Appaluchi Sarah Talamash is going to be at Soul Joes, which is the new fucking, you know, the new Madison Square Garden of Commonwealth, right? Sex. This fucking kid stepped in shit, didn't he? this fucking kid stepped in shit, didn't he? Uh,

I got a fucking, I got a goldmine in a fucking parking lot. I just bought a comedy club nobody wants to come to. I'm going to do it outside and drop some sand and get fucking Andrew Dice Clay and Louis and fucking Russell Peters is showing up and Sebastian Scalco just did 17 shows there. No good for him. He's a good kid. So no, I'm kidding. That was a lie too Well, all right check her out mush. What do you got Mike V Swarez check him out? Where are you gonna be mush? I'm not sure. I don't think I have anything killed July Well, I'll be back in next month. So All right, listen, here's the deal. Mush is probably going to be down at the village lantern, which is just opened up.

Brand new club. They redid everything. It's down by the seller. And Joe Russell is booking it and Mush will probably be down there with Joe Russell every night during the week, especially Friday and Saturdays. So if you're in the village, go down and support the village. And the comedy sellers open to, which I will be performing it. I performed that last week, a sad day night, four shows, unbelievable to be back.

We're going to talk about all that right now. You guys in the chat, all you ladybugs, hang the fuck out. We ain't going anywhere. This is for you. And all you guys, all you fans watching on YouTube, please subscribe, hit the button and make sure you like it and comment and thumbs up it. All you fucks that are thumbs down in it. You guys fucking mental patients. I mean, who does that? Who thumbs down? Something who thumbs down? I mean, your thumbs down a restaurant that, you know, gave you a San Manila or had a shitty Tara Masu. You know, thumbs down a podcast. Well, it's probably a mental patient, but all you other people, thanks so much,

subscribe, like and comment and make sure to patreon.com and go to robbercallylive.com. All my dates are up there. I am going to be Jesus Christ. I'm all over the place. I have a bunch of dates right here in Mushasim, bang We're gonna be at Newtown, PA on May 1st I can't wait to do that gig. I've done it before Beautiful town. We're gonna be in East Brunswick Square mall May 15th the paper mill June 12th They have me as Robert Kennedy The paper mill June 12th, they have me as Robert Kennedy.

Hopefully they'll change that. And then the funny bone and it goes on and on and on. And of course I'll be at the cellar. So keep up with me on Instagram and all my dates. And I will let you know that. And go to comicwearables.com. My merch is up there right now. Catherine Kelly is up there. YKWD shirts, go up there, get yourself a shirt.

We're gonna get a code, most fucking keep forgetting that. They got the Robert Kelly shirt. Look at that, look at how sweet that is, right? I'm gonna get Joe one of those. Would you wear that, Joe? Yeah, I'll wear that. Can I just say something really funny that has happened in the comments

that you got called Bobby Kennedy on the website. And then Crumb crumb bum writes, I hope you don't end up like John Kennedy. And I don't know if crumb bum's aware of this. Robert Kennedy also shot in the face. Yeah, but not as dramatic. Yeah, you know what I mean? Yeah, you got over shot. No, dramatic.

Are you? Who got just given a speed? I mean, he was winning. He was going to end the war. You got over shot at him. No, dramatic. Are you? Who got just given a speed? I mean, he was winning. He was going to end the war. He was winning and he literally goes, now it's on to Chicago and we're going to win there. And then he gets shot like a second later, right in front of his wife.

Yeah, K. He was in a car. He was done anyways. The JFK got his fucking brains splattered on a trunk and his wife was picking it up like like she dropped a salad. Okay. Yeah, they made a movie. I got it. Yeah. I'll do it. We're gonna listen. We'll talk. Let this a good topic of conversation. All right. We're gonna go to the names right now. There you go. We're gonna wrap up. We have the names Sarah and Joe of the new Patreon people that join every week.

And usually the people, like if you guys could do it, the $10 of people we give a little something extra to. And if you could read the $10 of ones, and just whatever, sing a song, say something to them, whatever you want. I can't see. I already you want. I can't see. I'm going to do Gary Winters.

Thank you for being a member. His name is Ryan Freer. Ryan Freer. Hey, any relationship to Steven Freer's author of High Fidelity or director, I meant to say of high fidelity. Is that good? That was great. Sarah.

Jay Dink. That's a great last name. Touchin dinks. We love dinks. We love dinks. Hey, Joey V is that is that Joey Vato of the Cincinnati Reds formally? I don't know who he plays for now. Joey Vini, Joey vagina. What's up Joey Vat? Joel? Ha, low key is me. I love that. That's his name. Low key is me. What's up? L, perfecto, cum bro. Nice. That's what I'm talking about. What's the emoji? Mike Mike Mike L. I love it. Great. J. Dink is fucking awesome. And then we got Joey V. Joey. And then there you go.

There's another one. Some guy three. Are you related to cream of some young guy? Nice. Nice. That's it. Dusted that one off. That's for me. Thank you very much. Brandon, what the fuck is 666? Who the fuck? Oh, that's gotta be. That's gotta be forget I'm ever mentioned it. Brandon Lila Debar Burbrerson, Robertson. There you go. Ah, there you go. Shane. Just Shane. That's it. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Shane Shane, you gotta give him a little extra. Shane, Shane, Shane, Shane, Nina, Booth. All right, now Jack.

Jack me off. To the box. Ha, ha, ha. There you go. All right, Brian Capone. What's up? Love you, dad. Thank you very much everybody for being a Patreon member.

You guys are the best Sarah. Make sure you go to YouTube, check out her special. I predate you right now. She's going to be one of the biggest comics in the world, her and Joe. They're going to be making movies. They're going to be touring. And you're going to be like Bob Ho. That's not true.

Bob Hoap. be like Bob who? Yeah. Bob Hope. Maybe Sarah. Maybe Sarah is going to skyrocket to the fame. Joe list. What do you got? Where are you going to be again? You're going to be at the Paramount in Austin, Paramount Theater, which is the people of the Paramount are fucking great. The lady who's booking it is amazing. The Creek in the Cave is there. Are you going to stop by there? Yeah, I'm going to stop by there early. Yeah, I'm going to stop by there.

I'm going to stop by Rogan's and do a whole thing. It's going to be a big trip. Are you doing Rogan? I think so. I don't know if we're allowed to say that, but I mean, yeah. Yes. Yeah.

His mad. Bobby left again. I'm gonna take my dick out. I'm getting half fun on Rogan. Don't take your dick out, Joe. Why? Because I can't blur it out. It takes too long to blur your fat long hog out.

No, half fun on the bandwidth. with how much that what's up? It's always good. I have the bandwidth. That's great. Are you going to go to Creek in the cave, too? Yeah. Yeah, I'm going to go the Creek in the cave. I'm going to go to Magnolia. I'm going to be all over the I'm going to be all over the place. I'm there for a week. Awesome. Fucking awesome. All right, man. Well, thanks for having a much, Mike V Swarez.

Make sure you check him out on Instagram and Twitter and Facebook. He's also the proof of the show at a very funny comedian. He killed last night with me at the gym Thorpe, Jesus, what a place. That was so awesome. I want to thank everybody that came out last night

to gym Thorpe PA to the theater. Both shows fucking awesome. I want to thank Joe Russell and Vinnie, FBI Vinnie. You guys came all the way to the fuck out there. It's such a blast. And again, I will be go to robacadalive.com. Find out all my dates. Newport theater is the next one.

I can't wait to do it. Robacada Live right there. See that? Boom. All my dates are up there. Go can't wait to do it. Robica alive right there. See that? Boom. All my dates are up there. Go to comic wearables.com. Get yourself a nice YKWD shirt. Rep it at the show. I'll give you a hug. And make sure you check out Joe and Sarah. Two of the funniest comics out there. And I love them to death.

And and what else? Moch, what else do we get to do? That's, that's all we do. We got everything we did. We hit all the beats. And we'll see you guys next week. You know what? See you later. You've been listening to the YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. Shitty jobs.

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