Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Naked YKWD
Episode Date: December 2, 2019We're joined by Greg Stone and Anthony DeVito from the Rad Dudecast for game of Swear and You Strip, and someone ends up naked and afraid! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/ad...choices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
I feel like we're on a road trip with our dad. You know what it is?
Really, really, really, really.
You know what it is?
Are you stuck or you stink? I
Come on guys dance I was feel it fucking let it out I thought you were videoing me and I started dancing for your text message
But he just
Like this and you actually are thumb moving too much like nice
You want to be a star so bad
Anytime there's a possibility that someone might discover something
I'm a producer. I show you dancing on Bob Kelly's story
And can you still move like that?
Greg is like I thought this day would come I remember your face
If I see a red light I go
Everyone I don't care what are these?
Stop it at a stop sign and I just got fucking dancing. Oh, I thought that was record
I love them in everybody else stop. It's Greg time. Yeah, it's not great
She read you
Video camera it's go time. This is my moment
video camera, it's go time. This is my moment.
What's up?
What's up?
What's up?
What's up?
Hey, it was pretty good.
I'm pretty good.
I've said this before and I'll say it again.
Many times.
I'll scream it from the fucking mountain tops.
I was a dancer at some point in my life.
Yeah, it seemed like you were moves.
You seem very fluid.
I had dance in me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, you'd be like,. I have dance in me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Like, chat him fucking Tatum Monial. What's his name?
Chat him fucking chat him. O'Neil.
Chat him. Chat him.
Chat him. Is that a same chat it's chat him O'Neil.
You got to just Irish potato.
Is that chat chat?
Chat him. No, chat him.
No, the New Jersey town.
This is an impossible situation. It's chanting Tatum.
But yes, you might want to go back to chatatham Tatum O'Neill the potato man later
See I'll say this about Bobby and this is why I think we connect on this level
Last
We sneak in Alice
Between sets where are you I'm about to sell. Where are you the grizzly pair?
See you in the lane around 10 minutes for three minutes of lust
40 seconds of gizz on you
So it's three minutes of lust and 40 minutes of gizz
40 seconds we do it a long he did come. Yeah, no, no, no far be it for me to get in the way of love I'm just interested in the time stamps
Yeah, yeah, yeah, been in there. Yeah, he shit's rope
He heard a homeless man one night with his jizz
Yes, he said I
Help the homeless I heard about this
Yes, yes, I don't have a lot of money to give away sure. I say you can drink drink from me. I say drink
Yes, I will quench your thirst
Excuse me. I long it had come
Some change anything and this is what I would place my hand upon your head and I say son
You've come to the right place. You've covered the right place.
It's so cold out, sir.
Your thirst will be quenched.
I'm freezing inside.
I've been a little warm silky smooth juicy
from old Greg.
But my dog is cold too.
Yeah.
We call it Gregatine.
It's like Obloutine, but it's my come.
Is this how it usually does?
Is this how podcasts happen?
No. This is the only way I know how which would come. Is this how we usually do, is this how podcasts happen? No.
This is the only way I know how to do it.
Yeah, I'll say that.
Oh, no.
The way I didn't do it is with Greg
and off the rails immediately.
He's always off to it.
Yeah, it's great.
And I was so excited.
No idea, it was gonna be here.
He was literally, what are you, Brian Reagan?
No idea, he was gonna be here.
I was working on it.
I've been working on it and thank you, Bobby.
You're welcome.
Oh, God.
No.
Pitchering him, warming the bellies of homeless men with hot gizz.
It's not sexual.
I always say it.
You know, or the pleasure of their belly.
It's close to citer
Warm I do something warm. We all believe in a cruise morning of cash or a sandwich. I do have my gizz
Out and I say something about the sound. I'd love to hear it. Did you check the sound because it sounds hot?
Are you sure? I know I'm gonna get a call Michael. No, it sounds good. Who's gonna call? I don't trust
My two producers. I don't trust them anymore
Because we've been going for seven years
No set I mean months of I get a phone call I get it first. I get an email from a fan dude
What the fuck's up with this? I'll go I'm paying for patreon
And I'm like I got you and then I go listen to it and your mic will be screaming,
I'll be low or I'll be high, you'll be low.
It's, and then I'll come back to them.
I didn't hear it.
And then they go, oh yeah, you're right, right there.
I might, did you listen to it?
Ah, and the silence, are you still there?
I'm still here.
Well, did you listen to it?
I didn't, well why?
Cause I didn't, I listened to the beginning of it.
But what about the rest of it?
No, I didn't.
You've an echo, there's an echo.
There's an echo.
You hear it?
As he's fixing the sound now, the sound sounds better now.
Are you doing something?
I have a mask.
I have a tumor.
So now it's got a sound guy.
Sound got a sound guy.
I'm a master of sound.
I have myself run a podcast where I do the sound
and have never watched a YouTube video.
And I would really be on my game because in the shadows is this
this other sound guy who looks like a Zach and Michael fucked and had a
baby that's what they would have I think it's so cool man you have an on-deck
sound guy yeah you're gonna go just waiting in the wing that had anything
happens to his finger out new guy it has the same shitty genetics as the other
Well, you want to have a guy that looks like the other guy that way for the chairs and the computers. They don't get confused
You know the chairs to get mixed up shared again all this I'm only used to one type of
Calibrated for bearded white guy all of a sudden anotheroque walks in. I don't know what to do.
So anyways, we have today, Michael.
Oh, let's announce our guests.
We don't need all that song.
Oh, man.
No, we do need it.
Let's tell me how to run my podcast.
I don't have a gear on it.
I'm out song and dance either.
I was a turtle back in the day.
I never had hay, but I drank a lot of water. Shoulder reversed that.
Because he should have been last. And that's why I'm a turtula cast.
All alone in the ocean, swimming in blue. And then you come down to my house, I take a poo. From the red dude cast we have Greg Stone and Anthony Navino.
Out of this podcast I heard a lot about.
Yeah, from me.
You're on it screaming.
Just listen to what?
You love us.
Just listen to what?
Wait, no.
We get fans.
This red, this red, in the studio where you're at is there
a lot of
Fallen hair from you guys
Mainly yeah, look like a fucking Labador retriever was sitting on
We are very hairy men. We take after Robin Williams our comedy idol
Oh our hero not so much for his style of of a comedy but for his hairiness and his thievery
I heard you guys a hacks. Oh, yeah. No. oh yeah no no oh yeah that's a big part of the but just the impraf yes all the stuff you've done so far
he did on a special oh yeah yeah yeah yeah you go back to nineteen eighty nine live from panamas
did he you'll find everything we had just done in there
isn't in the homeless versus mouth to keep them warm
and i go old school and i steal jokes I don't just listen to your set.
I break in your house.
I get in your face.
Like, this is my no.
I take their ID.
I say, I'll be back in a year.
I hear you doing my joke.
But isn't this your son, Brian?
Yeah, you do.
You do jokes about my wife, Don.
And Don says you don't need it.
And I'm like, what?
He's not married. Not to Don.
No, I've got this new max chunk you got to hear.
Very big.
I'm like, who is it?
Good name, Max?
The crowd was crazy because they're all thieves too.
So all my fans are all thieves.
Oh, you work the dark web in the black market.
The thieves guild.
Yes, the thieves.
You're working lamb alley.
Yeah. Yeah. Yes, we goieves. You're working Lamb Ali. Yeah.
Yes, we go, I show us have two things. Thieves and no shirts.
Yeah.
You only work bizarre.
You know, if you know one of my fans,
because they hold a gold coin in the middle of the city,
and I say, you are one of us, the Thieves Guild.
What are we talking about?
I'm flying.
You're always flying.
You're never not flying.
This is so.
When, if you could join a secret society,
if a secret society,
because I, a friend of mine is the mason's, right?
Okay.
And it sucks because of political correctness.
Sure.
And because I'll say women.
Let's say it, let's say it.
They just ruin every man's club.
Why can't we come?
Because you're not fun.
Because Gary can't,
we can't have a jerk off competition in the bathroom
for a dollar ahead,
it's you can come quicker.
If you guys are there,
yeah, you never have money on you.
You can't do it.
You're like like that's
disgusting that's why you get cubs yeah I mean I mean yeah we can't see how much
stuff can you put in Mike's ass we can't make those bets if you're there we can't
fuck these horses around you it's too weird it freaks the horse out you can't suck
each for them we can't suck each other. It's for them.
You can't suck each other off in front of a fireplace.
We would love to have all the presidents.
What if, what would be the, what club would you want, I mean, like the Masons, right?
That's, I mean, Jesus Christ, every building back in the day was built by these,
the Masons, I mean, it was a fucking pretty
prestigious, dark man's club.
You know, it was all this handshake stuff.
And I went to one last year.
I went to you.
They brought me in and I got to hang with them
and they're just regular guys.
I mean, they're a part of this club.
It's in its this weird building and, you know,
wherever I was, it's kind of of this club. It's in its this weird building and, you know, wherever I was.
It's kind of ominous looking from the street.
Then you go in, it's just a bar.
It's a bar, they have a kitchen.
It's like a VFW.
Like VFWs, remember that?
Remember the Irish American club, the Italian club.
These have all these clubs.
The French club, but they also have men club.
Just men, and you can't do that anymore.
They don't want men having clubs
Yeah, see I I would want a club not based on race or gender
I I believe there's two different types of people. There's your writers and your guys and then there's the song and dance men
I want a song dance man, you know, we're all we all get together and we go hey Todd and he goes hey
Gregory Song dance man, you know, we're all we all get together and we go hey Todd he goes hey Gregory
And we all just go Go go go go go go go go go and then we fucking dance with our pants and we have a good one of the cops shop all the time
Because they've neighbors are called cops so they're gonna be like next door
They're doing it again
They're doing it again
I told you like a rest a rest you're all under arrest
Well, last well last you have to be more,
I don't know, man, I just really,
I'm not the greatest at this,
making up the words part,
but I thought you added, man.
I thought it was right there,
I know, question yourself a second.
Just don't love myself.
You went blue, you went blue,
and that's where you went blue,
and you don't need to go blue.
We don't need to go blue,
let's not go blue.
Let's go. No curse is whole podcast.
No curse is, no podcast. No dirt, no person's whole podcast no curses no pocket no dirty no dirty great no party talk
so you said no party talk if I said it the other way it would have been
body talk missed the daft Auto ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I don't know. It's added control today. Yeah, I like it. I don't ever look at it
I just rely on other people's reactions to it. So I assume it's doing something wild
I'm gonna roll in a like a period piece
I am I'm trying out for the role of Downton Abbey the whole show though
I'm gonna do it all. I'm the castle. I'm everybody. I just booked a role of the man who followed Billy the kid
around his story day by day.
I'm on Mr. Kidz. Say that again, would you?
I said, I don't take it like that.
You're here today. I want to say it is multiple levels of hair, but it's like poofy today.
It's very 80s. You look like a David Hasselhoffian like.
Oh, okay. Yes, like a You look like a David Hasselhoffian, like, yes, like a, like a, like
a, like a BG 70 singer. If David Hasselhoff changed religions, and height, and body type,
and no-stip, and lips. And it was a junior member of ISIS. Yeah. And you're nailing it.
Is it other junior members? Yeah. I've kind of known the junior club.
They're like,
but if back to my original,
ooh, bra, you all right?
Back to my original question.
What club would you want to join?
If you could join a club,
like one of the other epic clubs.
I would definitely want to join
some kind of karaoke,
song and dance,
break dancing club.
In America, not Japan.
You wouldn't do that.
Singing and everyone brings their guitar.
Yeah, they have that.
What is it?
That's called the gay bar.
Oh, singing and dancing.
You're a little queen.
I like you.
I like the gizz on your spleen.
You know my dad died a gay and it's very,
it's really hard for me here.
Your dad died a gay?
Of gay.
Of gay.
Who's that man?
We got one he got gay.
You know, we were like, well, you know,
he only had like six months left, you know.
So we had to bring him to the hospital
and we also had our bittings
and then he fucked the shit out of nine.
Nine male nurses before nurses before he died.
Papa, he didn't know that's not fair.
I mean, I know it's not, I take four responsibilities.
I didn't know that you, your dad died.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah.
I didn't know.
I don't like talk about it, you know, because we didn't know.
I just didn't know how it don't like talk about it, you know? We didn't know. We didn't know. I just didn't know how it had to be.
It's hard to process.
It's weird because my father, my father,
really died a year ago yesterday, for real.
Yeah, okay.
So when you're doing this, it makes me think about him for real.
And I'm gonna cry right now.
Oh my God.
I'm sorry, man, I really, I thought I was doing a joke. I was just doing a joke about how it's got home.
I'm just really yeah.
All right, can I be serious for a minute?
It was a hey, I want to take it.
Okay, good.
Yeah, I shouldn't made that joke. It was a it was like four male nurses.
Exactly. Exaggerated.
My father really passed away.
I'm sorry.
I think he has to.
Oh, jeez.
Yeah, so thanks.
Now, go hike, I think.
Oh, boy. It's. Did your father die? No, my dad's working at Lowe's, that's a great time. I hope today, I hope today, he read the news and he's dead from fucking four hookers, male
hookers in a hotel room, like a red roof in.
Joe, you're gonna're just talking Joe that way
I hope that you find out that happened
Oh up
But if you found out your dad was gay, oh it would make so much sense really yeah
I think it would be like a lot of fuck cuz my dad would be so much more
You know my dad, you know like he my dad all he wants to do is sing and dance and have a great time.
You give him a reason.
It would give him a reason because really, like he would take flampoint to level 400.
My dad doesn't stop talking.
He's the best guy.
I love my dad so much, but gay would be the tail-aid.
He level with him, huh?
As you'd have Mateo lay there.
A lot of care.
You should, I would have Joe and Greg on at the same time. It's wild man. Yeah, yeah
He's funny. He I had him our podcast once he did 45 minutes straight of characters really of character
What character original characters original yes, give me one
Duke the shaver let me hear it Duke the shaver is some baseball player who would throw a ball so fast by your face. It would shave the hair
Duke the shaver boney lemon Hopkins is old blues player like who's yeah, he was he's melm melm and melm melm in my head
We can call my dad right now as melm melm and I
Will you will it'll get you'll get we got Skype? Oh, oh
We got Skype. We got Skype.
Oh, okay.
Oh, that's a beautiful.
And what was Mel Memman's big thing
was he booked you a gig in India, right?
He could.
He wives you.
This is big.
Mel Memman.
What are you doing?
I got you a gig with the Indians.
Like, he can get a little racing.
So, a little.
A little.
Yeah, yeah.
He's a pro out there quick.
He's actually the member and I can.
Oh, okay.
What's the deal?
David, let me ask you a question.
Is your father alive? No, no, dead in the ground for years. Oh really? Oh, yeah
We can talk we have things in common. We don't have a dad that fucking dancing
Yeah, I don't have a lover's down that I
Screws are right here. Get yourself a hammer.
I love you, my dear.
That was good.
What time, does your father really work at Lowe's?
Yeah, yeah, my dad, my dad did comedy.
My dad does stand up.
Really?
Yeah, he's really funny.
I grew up in Jersey, he's from the Bronx.
Okay.
Yeah, so like they're divorced.
Oh, they're divorced.
So you love your dad.
Oh, I love my dad, yeah, my dad is. Newing your dad is just fucking tight. Yeah, yeah, yeah, so like they're divorced right? Oh, they're divorced. So you love you dad. Oh, I love my dad Yeah, my dad is you and your dad are just fucking tight. Yeah, yeah
Yeah, my dad is he live is he is he doing all right? Is he married again?
He's married getting married. It's like he betty who's the best in my stepmom, right?
What about their kids they have kids together? You don't have kids together. They have a head kids never had kids right
We're about all of you want to let him know who gonna call from a I probably should tell him
He probably he doesn't you need to I would love to divorce my wife and meet somebody new
and never have kids.
Just be friends with my son.
You know, and fuck.
Yeah.
Joe's got a pretty good deal.
He's a very, he's like a very comfy guy in his older age.
Really?
Yeah, he wears a lot of like cool hats.
He seems like an old jazz guy.
Was he a boss?
Yeah, he is a lot like,
there's a lot like rich was. Really? Yeah, absolutely. like, there's a lot like, rich boss.
Really? Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah, he's like rich with nothing to prove.
Like, he's broke, but he's great.
Respect me.
Yeah, he's an honor.
And your dad died a long time ago.
My dad died.
I was a baby.
Ah, Bob, I'm sorry.
So you never knew him though.
I never knew him.
So that's why it's like, I never feel bad,
because I never had anything to miss,'s why it's like I never feel bad because it's I never had
Anything to miss, you know, but how old was he? He was around my age. I think 30 oh no shit. Yeah, what do you have?
Attack car accident. Oh, he got killed in a car accident. Yes. Was it his fault or their fault? I would say it was their fault
Did you ever find them to kill them? What? Did you ever find those people and kill them? No, that would be incredibly dangerous
Why? Oh because
No respect for your father's memory. Well, I know I do have tremendous respect for his memory
It's the the the people that he was involved with that would be like an ordeal
So the people that hit him were in the mob that is something I
Cannot get into that much.
You're not so sing-songy now, are you?
No, no, I'm not, Bobby.
You've really had a chord here.
I can't sing my way out of this one.
No, no. I can't. I only can't because that...
Maybe my friend Greg Stoke and sing-
Let's hear more about that turtle.
But dad got killed by the legendary mob.
No, it's not. He was bad with numbers.. You call him a sloth.
Driving down the street, trying to make it home to me.
He looked in his rearview mirror.
Smack.
He should have been able to add three plus three numbers mob, there were numbers, Bob, as you said earlier.
Yeah, yeah, there was a reason.
Is that was in the Asian mob?
What?
Yeah, big time Yakuza guy.
Yeah, really.
Big time, yeah.
Wait, stop.
Oh, yeah, stop.
Enough with your happy dad
that's still alive, we're gonna lose with him.
Who could?
Uh huh.
Did you say the word Yakuza?
Yeah, I'm not saying.
I've been waiting for somebody to say,
yakuza, on the YKWD for nine years.
Since I started this, I've been waiting for somebody
to go, yakuza, in a serious way.
Wait a minute.
Big yakuza guy.
Big yakuza.
Where?
Everywhere.
But anywhere you're from.
Where are you from?
I'm from Greg and I are from the same town.
We went to high school together.
We went to high school together.
You went to high school together?
Yeah, really?
Yeah, we stuck each other off in the fucking girl bathroom.
That's not enough for how close we are.
That would distance us.
Really?
Yeah, we are.
You never kept each other warm by sucking each other's gizz like a, just like a
font, like a circle in the snow and the niggle that you built.
When he is not in the room,
when he's in it, I apologize.
We're supposed to be clean today.
Yeah, yeah, you got this.
We'll pick it up now.
We'll pick it up now.
We'll pick it up in my business.
Until my dad gets a note.
Right now, two six, two four.
I can't, it's going too fast, seven, two, seven, five, four,
six, two, seven, eight.
Lean.
Let's just say 2632
And then a bunch of numbers
So if someone curses what we gotta do, you get a cross
You get a cross
No I like it, let's go big with the file
Go violent
Slap, slap, slap, slap
That's what I have to say
Slap in the face
What about a slap in the face?
That's it
We could do if you swear
Slap in the face
You can't slap in the face Don't swear. We could do if you swear, uh huh. Slap in the face. Okay. You don't swear.
But we could make it. But you say that thing before that's like like an
apology before you slap in the face, like you're making me do this kind of thing.
Yeah. Alright. How would this? Everyone want to do this.
What are you answer to swear? What counts as a swear? Oh, say something.
Oh, I'm the tester case. What a trick of the year. Oh, hell is okay. Say I said trick of the year. I'll say something. Oh, I'm the tester case. That's the trick of the year. Oh hell, is okay.
Is that?
I said the trick of the year.
I'd say, I'd say PG 13.
No F moms.
No, no, no S's, no S.
What's that?
You know.
What?
Slimey.
Oh.
That's a fine slap.
The silliest slap I've ever seen.
Why did you? That almost felt comforting. I'm a one slap. The silliest slap I've ever seen. Why did you?
That almost felt comforting.
I'm like one now.
Oh, no.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Shit, man.
It was like a little planking.
My hand smells like corn.
That was some weird shit, probably.
Yeah.
Whoa.
It's so thin!
What if I start jerking off?
Your hand is underwater! I don't know how you're slowing down time!
It's unbelievable! Fuck me for watching you!
How could Bobby get to do all the slaps? We all get to slap!
I want to slap you, come here!
You have to swear first!
Oh no, yeah, I didn't swear.
You know what I come at? Yeah, you snap like a Winged Drone fighter.
Yeah.
Like, it man.
Yeah.
Because if you're going to snap, you got to get as much
touch as possible.
That's what I say.
A hard slap here.
You didn't do it.
I say, get a marion.
Feel around.
You have to skin the little finger to my mouth.
Go and you slap it away.
And a finger, your tonsils. You want to skin the little finger to my mouth. Oh, you slap it away and a finger your tonsils.
You want to call my dad?
Yeah, let's just call a billy answer.
He's such a maniac.
You want to talk about a guy who needs a spotlight.
Yeah.
I want to get back to the Yakusa.
Oh, absolutely.
We did in that church.
He's a church.
Always.
Why?
He loves it.
The nationality. Italian. Yeah. Italian. Full blood. Full.
Full Bronx. Yeah. Yeah.
Because we're all Italian. Yeah. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. All of us.
We got that hot blood. We should go fight someone on the street because like cross
what else should we do to them? We should overtip someone. What else? We should.
Come on. get dirty. Oh
Has been forwarded to an automated voice messaging system
Oh, we could
Give the number out the chance of
Thousand people call them a day you know on my everyone
on my everyone. You know what my friend's calling you dad. Trust me. Yeah. Yeah.
I have prick. He's gonna be so mad. Oh, he's probably a
loz. We should call those and have him page him. That's a great
great idea. Can we, are we able to do that? That's great.
I heard. Yeah, we sounds like like a cartoon from this 70.
That's a great idea, Scoob. Yeah, Scoob, here's Veronica.
Not a big fan of Scooby-Doo, but the girl with the glasses?
Velma?
Is there anything hotter?
Oh, man.
Velma, yeah, but she was the hipster.
She was the original hipster.
Yeah, but she wasn't hipster then.
She was just a nerd.
She also wasn't into dudes.
What do you mean?
She was the, she was the, she was the, uh,
she loves dogs.
She likes dogs, she was the Lesbo of the group.
Lesbo?
She's the Lesbo!
Did she die?
Yeah, the hot chick and the Lesbo.
You don't want anything to do with it.
I'll never cry, I'll probably die.
But she probably died what?
Like a crem, like my dad.
Oh, of gay.
Of gay.
Yeah.
No, no, no, no.
She married a gay ghost. Oh, a gasp, right? Yeah, no. It was fast for of gay. Of gay. Yeah. No, if you married a gay ghost.
Oh, Gaspers?
Yes, no.
It's Gaspers for gay.
He might be.
He didn't have to be all about it.
Some people aren't out with their first.
I don't know if it was gay.
I guess Gaspers was gay.
He was a little boy, so we don't know what he could have been.
He could have been anything.
Being gay is nothing now.
I don't know if it's gay.
It's great.
No, nobody has sex.
Sex is sex.
Yeah. I know somebody guys just like, yeah, I blew it, dude. I can't think gay is great. No, nobody has sex. Sex is sex. Yeah.
I know somebody guys just like, yeah, I blew a dude.
I can't.
That's what I say.
I don't believe in gay.
Everyone knows this about me.
I don't believe in gay.
I don't believe anything.
I believe that you're fuck what you see.
You see something.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, it gets me.
You.
I want it.
You have one.
Come here.
Yeah, stick out your tongue, Greg.
Oh, Twitch is gonna hurt more. Yeah, yeah, stick out your tongue Greg. Oh Yeah
That one didn't hurt physically so much it's emotionally
That felt like there was something behind I have
My whole middle fingers wet from his bottom lip
Yeah, I put it out there to get a little extra
Let's change We'll change slapping to close to close. Yeah, you have to take some of you a article
Oh, I never got to slap anyone you fuck
I don't know if I can do it go let me line her up
You got him that hurt my oh I hit the camera lens
That actually hurt my chest
Still he I feel it that's cool. Yeah, that's how you get up. Oh, that's still, I feel it. You know what that's called? Yeah, my less called love. That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love.
That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. That's called love. You have a long-term girlfriend. You've never done weird stuff with her. Oh, yeah.
I would say that.
Yeah.
It's the same response Dick Van Dyke would give.
Well, you're moral.
Yeah.
I mean, you know, I certainly like the banjo.
Is there a thing you want to do that you've never done?
It's actually.
Yeah.
Yeah, I would think there are like a lot of things but that's a great. I just don't know them
I only I don't really like know them in the moment. I feel like did you look up at Amazon position that I sent you? No
You know, oh was that where the girl it seems like the girl is more like I's gonna put his legs up
And then she kind of like fucks. It's like all the take something off. Yeah, there it is. Take a shoe off you dirty little boy.
Ha ha, one shoe.
Very blue shoe.
Put the shoe right in the middle.
We're gonna keep it.
I wasn't sure if that was the trial by the end.
Yeah, that's fun.
What were you saying?
I wasn't super into that.
That didn't grab me.
Yeah, it's like, I like that.
Yeah, what is it?
It's so like, you have to kind of look it up.
It's all the, it's, do you put your legs up and your dick kind of comes out and she
like, it's, sorry, what did you just say?
That's my my friend.
You can't say that, you gotta say, we're on FM radio right now.
This is a terrestrial show.
We just gonna go get a take callers.
And your response will find anything your dad says.
No.
Yes. Oh, he won't curse. No, he dad says. No. Yes.
Oh, he won't curse.
No, he'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not.
He'll say, it's not. He'll say, it's not. He'll say, it's not. He'll say, it's not. He'll say, it's not. and then you're responsible for probably negative five seconds. Yeah, so Amazon position, like you pull your legs back
and your kind of balls that goes out the other side.
I saw that.
And she sits on you and fuck,
like I said, you know, it's all the gay without the dick.
Right.
All right.
Set it again.
We're clean.
You can't say that on FM terrestrial, YKWD,
this is terrestrial YKWD.
All right. Thank you so much. This is all a ploy. Ben terrestrial YKWD, this is terrestrial YKWD.
Take a soft thought.
This is all a ploy.
And Greg is wearing a strap on over his dick.
Up he's down to his underwear.
And why is it a dick?
Now you're gonna take something off.
Yeah, man.
Man, you're gonna earn your underwear quick.
Nice, Nick.
Nice, Bob.
Those harrachis.
Yeah, they are.
So, okay. Something should be near's? Yeah, they are. So.
Okay.
Something should be needed.
This is what you're talking about.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm not super into this.
I couldn't do that.
Yeah, I can't either, but it's so enticing to me.
During the-
It's so enticing to me.
That's not enticing to me.
That's not enticing to me.
That's the wrong word.
Has anyone tried that?
Hang on, let me find out what,
Hey Siri, what does enduring mean?
As an adjective, it means continuing or long lasting.
You're right, you're right.
Sorry about that.
I just also want to take note that I took my pants off
because I don't want to expose this studio
to my exema on my feet,
but I had to go right for the pants.
That's the right thing to do.
That's the thing I did.
I don't want to get everyone asked.
That's everybody. What I have, it isn't a little chimuli in here. Can you catch Exama?
You can I use your eyes you'll see it. You'll vomit. They will have a vomiting podcast. You have Exama on your foot
I have you ever see the show of the week of no the week of what's called the last week tonight? No, no
It was about the John to tell yeah
The night of these guys got a foot problem.
I have the same foot problem.
They literally base the show on the ailment of my feet.
Really, what is it?
It's called dehydronic.
Dehydronic.
Is that my or something, she like that?
Now, did you have it your whole life?
I've had it for at least 15 years.
So your wife knew about it when she married you.
Yeah, that's the least I've ever had.
She has to put the stuff on.
You can, you can.
She's so sweet.
Well, like she'll get like busy a little bit
and then my foot'll touch her foot and she's like,
and like you see her just kind of back off a little
and I'm like, it's okay, honey.
Cause it's like a lizard walking by or something?
Yeah, look at the Google picture.
It's wild.
No, that's a good, that's my feet.
They should Google me and my hands
are my feet are way worse than that.
I would say that finger on the right, but just that small section, that's like what Greg's
whole foot really.
Yeah, it's not right currently.
I'm doing really well.
It's, but when it was how do you get it to do well?
I found the right dermatologist who, um, who like put me on the right cream, but if I take
a day without that cream, you'll see me in the in fetal position scratching with a fork.
Does it hurt? Oh, man. It feels every time you scratch see me in the fetal position. Scratching with a fork. Does it hurt?
Oh, man.
Every time you scratch, it's like a thousand climax.
Of course.
It feels good.
It feels crazy.
So it makes you wanna scratch.
It's like scratching your asshole.
Oh, better.
By a hundred thousand.
Yeah.
Maybe you wanna get this exiba.
You're good.
He used to keep a thing in the old apartment
that was a stand for his action figures.
It had like a jagged edge and Greg would use that to scratch his feet with it.
And then just put it right back on the living room table.
We're people who are reading.
Yeah, that's a wild move.
So weird stuff.
Oh, you cursed?
Yeah, what did you say?
I can't tell you, but I'm honest.
That's all you need to know.
Oh, I thought you were taking it off because my ex- but I'm honest. That's all you need to know. Oh, I thought you worked it.
Taking it off because my ex-amer was exciting you.
That's what I thought I thought I'd do.
I was like, oh, he was like,
Bobby's getting into it.
He was like, all right, let's get this thing off.
I got to see what this thing's about.
I've known a lot of people with Exima all the years.
My step, my, what the hell was he?
Foster father, Ken Laz had Exima, really bad.
He had to put cream on it all the time.
My wife's dad had Exima, or a bad,
like on his elbows and hands and stuff and legs.
And yeah, I remember he used to sit,
he used to sit on the couch on his recliner,
with just boxers on.
Oh yeah.
And it was just like, what is that?
Just, he's a big guy.
You've got the gray scale.
I have a picture of him once I snapped a photo
and I was just, I can't find it.
He's just him and his boxes.
He just looks like somebody like toasted a hot dog.
Yeah, yeah.
It's crazy.
When this started happening to me,
I started looking back at old like rib-least fixtures.
I'm like, oh, this is the human scale man.
I was like, no, that guy's just got insane eczema.
So that's probably what that is.
Now, but you found out, so this came on like later
and you didn't have it as a kid.
Not as a kid, I've ever.
How does it come on?
How do you get it?
It's not contagious, right?
No, well, that's the thing.
They were telling me it was athletes foot for like 10 years.
And so I was like, yeah, none of these athletes foot
medicine works.
I was just seeing the wrong dermatologist
and I was spraying it with all types of bad shit.
And then in the dry weather, it gets worse.
And anxiety would make it worse, which was crazy.
So the better I got in my career,
the better it started to get.
Also a combined, combined with health insurance,
but like when we were doing bad,
like if I had a bad set, I'd be home
literally with like a,
I had this one fork knife that had dulled itself.
And I would just, like I was eating,
I was a scrape at a part, like I was eating an apple in the 20s.
Like an old western apple.
Well, you with him, did you know him when that happened?
Yeah, you saw it.
Absolutely.
And what would you say?
I would, uh, keep going.
I love it.
I don't know.
Yeah, I wouldn't be like, oh man, this is a,
the other thing too that's funny about that is
his feet would tell the truth.
You know what I mean?
Like if you were like, Greg, how is that said?
He was like, pretty good.
You'd be like, your feet are bleeding.
You sure?
I was thinking you were in the addition, Greg.
It was awesome.
It's the Prince of Blood in the bathroom.
It's smokey.
Coming out of your socks. I was to look, I was driving once,
and my foot was so bad, I popped my sticker off,
I tried to itch it on the brakes,
and I slammed on the brakes and traffic,
I got a little more accident.
Oh man.
I was like, oh my dad said, what time I say now?
Yeah, good.
Beautiful.
Let's see.
Wasn't it a thing too with the exima
where it was like, you went to an allergist too, right? I went to the allergist and she was like we're gun she goes she literally said to me she goes
This is my new goal for life. We're gonna fix this and she test me for like all these different allergies
Finds out an allergic to my own sweat like this weird thing like so she was like the show house
She was calling me like house feed today, and I'm like I don't know not so good
And she's like I recommend and then she
Recommended me to this she figured out what it was and then recommended me to a really great dermatologist who then came in and went I
She's one in the country who was like, you know, I've seen this a few times before and she gave me this cream and it was fucking great. What?
What's it gonna be what's it gonna be?
Now that's not close. Yeah, come on man. That's an article. That's a single. That's a shitty decision you made
I can't go full shirtless
In the in the within the hours of our huh? Go full pay I'm saying like you go full pay
endless full pay
endless
That's the story
Really in that
Um
That was clay and dad
Man
What did I say?
I don't know
What did I just say?
You said fuck
Oh
You got to join
It's rap
Man I got to join my friends here
I was
I say we do the reverse, we start fully naked
and the more we curse, the more close we put back on.
I think, right?
Once we come round to that, then you do that.
Yeah, right about that.
You're a sexual, then we just start sweating.
We just wore jackets.
Regular stuff doesn't turn you on, doesn't it?
Actually, we put our clothes on.
Well, Anthony told me this very,
he gave me one of the greatest things, greatest
things that ever do in my life. This is years ago. He's Anthony. This man right here. Oh,
I don't know, maybe you forgot. I don't know. I forget sometimes. I invited him on the
show. No, no, my show. Do you want a desk? Dude, if I had enough room in my Honda Civic, I'd get this baby.
Well, yeah, come in.
How do you like the 4-Series?
Up with a knife?
No, we can't fit a desk in our podcast studio.
We'll figure this out.
You want to get this whole thing in there?
I can't.
You can't.
I think it's too funny to move, not to have this full thing.
It would be so...
It would be so funny.
It would be really fun.
You want it?
Come and get it.
No, there's no way for me to get it.
All you have to do is this. Unscrew the the legs and then it's just a big piece of plywood this piece of plywood is larger than my card after rental limousine
limousine
Yeah, I'd fall as a V in other things before let me see how rich I am. That's great. I love it I'm so unbored with that idea who moves a big up truck like any idiot
Regorant full white limousine. You see him in a white talk having a scotch with the stickin out of the summer
Oh boy, who is this guy? Who's this man about that? Gerald. It's moving day. Oh, that's we say let's get your boxes
Another good day for us.
So you have, did we call you father?
Are we ready to do this?
I'm ready.
Let's call it.
What's his name?
Joe.
Joe.
Joe.
Hey, the number.
Don't put the show the camera on the number.
The camera?
No camera?
Not on there.
Oh, good.
Relax.
Well, I don't know. Oh, you pay my dance protection. Is he in a submarine?
He's 14 leagues out. Oh, yeah, low
Low submarine division levies
This means this is a dance. I didn't dance to that
Hello
Mel hello, Mel. Yep. I need to speak to my agent
Is Mel there? I'm not hold on. I'm out with Jimmy found me a minute
Yeah, it doesn't a lot of work for me that one of these bigger clients. Yeah, he has he has Jimmy Fallon is one of his clients
Yeah, yeah, he's big he does well. I'm huge
I'm big now. Is this is this grand势? Yeah
I saw you bitch. Yeah this this is this grand stone? Yeah. I saw you bit. I love it. You're fabulous. I want to book. I want to book you an Anthony
2020 Kindle Festival
We can do this we can do it. Man, I know. Mal another year at the Hindu festival. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah
Mel another year at the Hindu festival. I don't know. Yeah, yeah, I love we could do oh, they do okay
Anthony listen to me. They love you. We got you's coming in this year on an elephant. My name is darling
We got a little pop she drags away. Don't worry about it. I got you insured. They love you The fatels love you missus, you know, Rami Patel. He's big
He's using new Delhi. All right.
So what do you say boy? Hey sir, what about Robert Kelly? Have you ever heard of the
comedian Robert Kelly? Robert Kelly. Never heard of him. He was. He was with a he did
have a manager agent two weeks ago, but they're gone now
So he's out there. He might look at for somebody
Mel Mel nice now easy male. We were wanted to call you we have a potential to do client for you
Yeah, we want to
we thought maybe you and Robert would edit off. Do you have like an interviewing process?
So do you have any videos? Send me a video. Where does he work? Where's he work? He works all over.
He's an open mic. Yeah, open mics. Hold on, hold on. Hold on. Hold on. I've got another call.
Hold on. This could be real. This could not be. Yes, the near-row.
Not for today. Talk in the near-row. Just call me.
You got to take it off your shirt.
He wants to know if I like.
That's more.
What's that?
Who is it?
He wants to know if I like the Irish.
Why you guys talking open me?
You know who the thing is not a moment.
Well, Melmann.
Yeah, sorry, Mel.
Sorry, Mel.
So wait, what did the near-row want?
He wants to know how i like the movie
the Irishman bad it what can i say
i told bobby give it up all right time to go home
take the ball go home you finish
you're done in this town
mel
what can i say?
mel
i told Mr. Rogers last night too
did you?
oh my god
how was it?
calm anxious
calm anxious
i got to tell you boy they're really stretching it out there Oh my god, how was it? Tom Hanks is the Roger.
I gotta tell you boy, they're really stretching it out there,
it's a pencil town.
There's a real stretch in it.
Wait, what do you mean?
What do you mean?
What was the stretch for you?
What was too much?
No body can cover for it
uh...
one
he's unique
it's him
nobody else
we don't need a biography go on youtube for that
it's
i love that saying that the movie industry
we're doing a friend rotters we have to do big-sits
i'm gonna do a google i would
well are you interested
are you interested in signing a new client now?
I sure for you for you boys you do the Hindus you do the Hindu festival before me and I'll bring Kelly and
Kelly Kelly oh Kelly oh
Client we talking about Kelly we're talking about yeah Bobby Bobby Kelly who now who's on your who's on your roster right now that you might have to make room for Bobby
Aside from Greg and my side I might have to remove Freddie Roman shouldn't be a problem is dead
Loyal guy you are milk held on to me even in death
I'm very honored. I'm very honored. Thank you very much for bringing me on the roster.
Listen, kid.
Can you steal material?
Yes, absolutely.
Perfect.
You're my kind of guy.
Now this is a mix.
I usually get 19 percent.
What?
I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. Perfect
Now this is me I usually get I usually get 19% what for you
Since you know the boys my two sons over there. I'll bring you in at 9% 9. That's a deep discount. I'm at 15
I'm your real son
I'll listen to your boy And I'm only I'm a medicare. I can't get that part be too fucking expensive. I need a flexible
All right, I love you dad. I'll I love you
Hey, how about hey, how much is it the Walt drill and driver set?
89 Thank you very much.
Zeylan and Mel.
All right.
Love you.
Listen boy, thankful coin.
I gotta go.
Love you too.
He's a great person.
Bye.
Oh man.
What a good.
Now that's a dad.
Yeah.
Isn't that crazy?
Like he can improv.
He's never taking improv.
Yeah.
He can't wait.
Stop.
He can either improv or he needs some serious
Just a lunatic it loves
And I can tell he as soon as you got on he held back a little bit. Yes. Yes, but um, but yeah
Usually he's like more off the rails. Yeah, yeah, he went I think because we even we did you know
Spring on him live on the air. He clearly was at work
And I said dad could we call you he goes sure when I go now he goes okay He did spring on him, live on the air. He clearly was at work.
And I said, Dad, can we call you?
He goes, sure, when I go now, he goes, okay.
And then we just call them.
He had to go hide in the insulation.
He made a little room, a little green room for himself.
All right, hang on one second.
Roll the door up and a Michael, get the door up
and I'm gonna go and talk to him again.
My dad's like an old school classic salesman.
He's from the time when salesmen were like,
were like, they follow up, they send you cards.
And like he still does that.
Like he sold someone like a washer and dryer
and they came back in, they were like,
this guy sent us a Christmas card.
And they were like, he was like,
yeah, my salesman, that's what salesmen do.
Right, you know, like, your kids,
they know your names.
They like, they like, they messed them up a little
because he used to be a commission guy.
And that's how they made like all their money. And then, those like, they messed them up a little because he used to be a commission guy and that's how they made like all their money and then lows went to non commission.
But he still is like the salesman, salesman who follows up, he knows your kids names.
Right. The code of the sale. Yeah, the code of the sale.
Yeah. Great movie. Yeah. Yeah. Just of your dad, the code of the sale.
The code of the sale is in like the Apple store. Yeah. Yeah.
I mean, like, it means the world to him.
Because to get to the Apple care.
He gets in trouble for sending a Christmas
because they're Jewish.
And the kids are scared.
And he wants to get in,
but he wants to get in trouble.
You can't send cards.
Why?
The code of the sale.
The code of the sale.
Yeah. And the movie just kills all his,
everybody who has bought it,
he just murders everybody.
It's just what you want.
Yeah.
Yeah, he's, yeah, he's great.
They used to do door to door.
People, I remember the vacuum guy,
we'd call him door to door.
Yeah.
The electrolyte, whatever the hell it was.
Carrying vacuums. Carrying vacuums.
Carrying vacuums.
Different things.
Every year he'd come down and be like,
listen, this thing is, this is the new,
this hose right here, the suction on this is five,
five percent more suction than last year's mom.
And you want to know if it just dropped those coffee grounds.
Look at that.
Yours can't do that.
I know.
I'm going to give you my discount.
And he would sell my grandmother.
And my grandmother would, she was lonely.
My grandfather really didn't talk to her.
So she would talk to this guy for hours.
And then go, no.
No, this guy would have to just hoof it to the next house.
Now somebody comes to your door. You're like, beat it. Call the police. I'm just going to go and get a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little What kind of weapons? I have one of those sticks you flip out. Ooh, that's fun.
What do those call?
Flipstick.
A flipstick.
You never had a flipstick?
It's not a flipstick.
It's a flip.
It's not a flipstick.
It's a flipstick.
It's not a flipstick.
It makes the noise.
First of all, flip is my word I made up many years ago.
Well, I'm gonna fight you straight in the streets
because flip is the international sound of Spider-Man's webs.
No, flip, flip, flip, flip.
That's not... It is. It's not flip, part of man's webs. No, whip whip whip whip whip whip.
It is.
Yeah, whip whip whip whip.
It is not a squit squit squit.
Oh, wait, it is.
Now I'm hearing it.
Squit squit squit squit squit squit squit.
Squit squit squit.
That sounds right, but it's not.
Now it is right.
It's squit squit squit squit squit.
Squit squit squit.
Oh, it's thwip.
I'll fight all of you right now.
Oh, it's like an in betweenbetween, both you guys are saying.
Could you just type in Fwip?
Because I bet somebody did it.
Oh, it's thwip.
It's always been thwip.
It's always been thwip.
It's always been thwip.
Nick is Woreen's noise.
Yeah, flip.
Look, Fwip, the ice cream cone place
I opened up years ago.
It's first of all, that's not ice cream.
Yeah, it's ice cream.
It's Fwip ice cream.
We also have ice cream, that's a colonic.
Good to go back to Greg's business motto. It was an ice cream it's whip ice We also got ice cream. That's a colonic good to go back to Greg's business model is an ice cream cone place
No, it did not get cups. They don't want to hear about it
Oh God y'all got a y'all got that lens on the on the you
Will you put it a door they ring it you can see people?
The ring that that's what you're talking? That's what's called the ring.
Oh, I love it.
No, I just, so I threw up in my mouth.
Never get a smoothie from a place that literally admits they're going out of business.
Yeah, you don't want to nothing to lose smoothie.
I just remember he had an ice cream scooper and he scooped something out of a tin that was black.
And then some, yeah, and purple.
Yeah, there's a tar berry.
You know, the aroma of blazes.
Yeah, man.
You were talking, I had a swallow it.
You wanna fuck your life up?
Excuse me, shirt.
Woo!
You're down, man.
You're down to your last piece of clothes.
Um, well, you really to mess this life up.
Yeah. And I actually know you just fixed it because what I was talking about is where
one sock, one sock throws you off.
Yeah. One sweaty foot, one cold one.
It really makes me just feel like, yeah, yeah, you don't look bad.
No, they're good looking now.
No, it's who this one nail I got to get on.
But yeah, you mean that baby nail?
Yeah.
Save it to open letters.
Isn't that more fun. Yeah, save it to open letters. Isn't it
Are you fighting lizards with your feet?
What is that you feel a good buddy? Then look bad at all I had a one I was thrown out of a bar once for my feet and no you weren't yeah because I said this
You put on people's mouths. Yeah, well, no, where are you? Oh, Jiu Jitsu, right? I love how oh, that's real
Like a real thing. Oh, okay, stop. We're gonna go back. We're gonna get to that as the host of this show
Me I thought we were friends. I thought it was equal here. I thought there's a
Z equal part in rural because I
Have to let you know when we're done
I thought this was the part of it.
Do we have any reads today?
No.
Okay, happy Thanksgiving.
Oh, nice.
That's my read to you.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Oh, silent anxiety.
Let me just say this before we get to this.
What is the silent anxiety is a new album out right now?
Who's on the, he's getting the information right now.
It's a Christmas album out tomorrow, I believe, correct?
Correct.
Tomorrow it's out.
It's got, who, Louise, who's on it?
Emmy Blotnik, Jared Fried, Joel Johnson, yourself, Robert Kelly, Mesquite Kerson, Joey
Cola, Mateo Lane, Nathan Macintosh, Lenny Marcus, Bonnie McFarlane, Sean Patton, and Greg
Stirling.
They call me this the headliner.
That's why I bring it up.
What is silent anxiety is an album out for Christmas.
Get it today at virtual comedy network.
There you go.
It's that's who produces it.
We can get it everywhere.
So make sure you pick that out.
It's a very funny album.
It's a Christmas album.
It's about Christmas and holidays.
And I mean, that line of speech for itself. There you go. It's a Christmas album. It's about Christmas and holidays and I mean that line-up
Speaker itself. There you go.
There's a great lineup. Yeah. What? You didn't ask? What?
You know they didn't have Anthony on because of his you know him and him and Jim got into a fist fight.
You did? Oh yeah, yeah. Me and Jim got into a fist fight. Yeah, absolutely.
Him and Jim sir, but yes, because stop. Listen. I need. Yeah, this is stuff because you introduced a lie and then Bobby In earnest wants to know me more.
I don't know what to do either.
You should know.
Of course my dad wasn't in the Yucusa.
I know.
I'm so sad.
I know you're gonna be so mad,
but I couldn't do this any longer.
Oh, you didn't know that his dad wasn't in the Yucusa?
Dude, I was gonna end the show with that.
Look at his face.
No, and I couldn't do it. Because this is trying to make a real connection with me
And we just we haven't talked enough yet. We have to get to the honest. Yeah, I connect and you're
Introducing these lies and you and you said I know I know I thought man. I know I've been waiting nine years
I know I know I know I know I couldn't do that to you. Your father just died?
Well, I can't really get into super specifics only because
my mom will freak out.
That's the honest to God truth.
Okay.
He was in the mafia.
Are you lying?
I'm not lying.
So your dad was in the mafia.
He was in the mafia.
Right.
Is there a book I can read there. No
Is your movie I could see a documentary? No, can I make one about your dad without your mom knowing?
I won't not the Italian mob. I want to put him in the yakuza. Yeah, I got no problems with that
So he got killed in the car. He was killed
So the mob killed him in a car accident. Yeah.
Led boys thing.
You stink.
You're such a, no, what do your dad died?
You guys are rats.
Why?
You broke in five seconds.
Your mom told them not to say anything.
Well, then I broke him.
I go, he's coming.
Car.
No, I'm starting to talk about this stuff.
That stuff.
Oh, you are.
It wasn't, it was a thing where like growing up,
I just wasn't supposed to say to anybody. Yes, but like as the years went on
It was more like I just hated lying about it as years when I kind of wore me down
So like I she's okay with me just talking about it
But I can't get into super specifics just in case what was what why they killed them. Yeah, like stuff like that
No, what no, it's a weird thing. Can I say something? Yeah good usually when the mob takes somebody out
They don't take somebody out from their side too like that is that's a weird thing. Can I say something? Yeah, good. Usually when the mob takes somebody out, they don't take somebody out from their side too.
Like that is a risky move.
Yeah.
That's very demolitioned Derby, Duke's a hazard.
I mean, what are you gonna do?
We'll take him out with the car.
It's usually not with the mob.
You shoot somebody, stab somebody, blows the car up.
Well, they, yeah, they, I mean, they found him in a car.
That's really what we're talking about.
They found him in a car. So it wasn't a car accident.
No, I would tell, she would have me tell people
car accident.
They got no car accident.
The big one was an accident.
Yeah, it's not.
It's, it's, it's, it was an accident in a car.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
It's just, so it's, it's kind of, it's the truth.
It was an accident in the car.
So it was a car accident.
Yeah, because if you had an accident in the car,
if you, if you went PPs, right, in the car, that would be a car accident. Yeah, because if you had an accident in the car, if you went PPs, right, in the car,
it would be a car accident.
Yeah, that's true.
If you threw up in the car.
That's a car accident.
Right.
If you, you have an example?
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, if I turn on the wrong radio station.
Yes.
Oh, accident.
That car.
I mean, it's a little one.
Yeah, it's a little one.
It's not a lot of people are sure. Sure, he has a little, I mean, it's a little, a little one. Yeah, it's a little one. It's not a lot of people around.
Sure, he has a better one than that,
because he might actually create Tiffany's, go ahead.
If I went to turn on the radio,
but I turned on the heated seats.
Yeah, that's a car accident.
Yeah, I'm scared to talk,
because if I make one false move,
everyone has to see my penis.
So now I'm sure, frozen, I'm frozen in gratitude.
Well, you have to cover it with a sock.
Yeah, it's a can't choke, it's a can't put it on YouTube.
No, we have a sock for that.
Yeah, we have a sock.
You have a sock?
Yeah, well if you got socks, I love some sock.
We have a C sock.
No, you can't put a sock back on.
Because I got an exema from my feet.
Yeah, it's okay.
I want.
We got a studio sock for that.
You just want the sock to put on your one foot.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's pretty cold and itchy. I'm using all four spores. All right, you can put your socks back on, but you, they're already off. Like, you can't go back to them.
What?
You can put them back on.
Huh?
But we count them as off.
Because you're...
Oh, I see.
Yes, the rest will pass through the shirt.
Because if somebody walks up right now, a female, they'll throw up if they see your feet.
Yeah, it's going to be a bad situation.
I want, you can put your socks back on, but you can't go back to the socks.
That's a great idea.
It's a great example.
Okay, good.
Let's your example.
I'm going to put them back on. I'm going to put them back on. I'm going to put them back on. I'm going to put them back on. I'm going to put them back on. because if somebody walks up right now, a female, they'll throw up if they see your feet. Yeah, it's gonna be a bad situation.
I want you to put your socks back on,
but you can't go back to the socks.
That's a great idea, that's a great example.
Let's your example.
Now, did you touch your feet with that microphone hand?
No.
Did it not?
So you dad, you dad.
I had a blatin' leg.
So, you dad died in a car accident.
Yeah, from the mob.
From the mob, yeah.
Right, yeah.
Right, wow.
Yeah.
And now, why do they, now I always wondered this about the mob.
When something like that happens,
is the family, freeing clear?
Are you guys done?
Or is it a thing where it's a guy we took care of him?
That's it, he was the problem, the son and the,
and the, because in the movies,
they'd be worried about you because, you know, 20 years from now you grow up
and then you're sitting at a bar and you're like,
hey, can I get some more shiggy?
Mr. Coleon and you're like,
think you're getting your stabs.
Yeah, yeah.
And you walk out,
and you remember my father in the car accident?
Yeah, no, they,
my mom pleaded with them to leave us alone.
Right, and it worked.
So they kind of spared us.
What was your father in account?
Or what?
No, he was in it.
Yeah, he was, he was, he was,
He was the moon.
He was the moon of a different guy.
Yes, you wouldn't have been this nerdy looking Jewish kid.
When?
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¿Cen a… ¿Cen a… ¿Cen a…
SÃ, cuando nosotros eran más grandes, era como… know, you just, yeah, we have a safe word, say Randy.
Okay.
The Randy, if I gotta pull out.
But Matthew's have like a crazy,
he's like the most mellow calm guy in the world.
I was like, yeah, I think about this yesterday,
it's like, yeah, we've even made, we've talked about it,
but it's like, yeah, I mean, when you know who your dad is
and is capable of, you're gonna make your entire personality
like you do not have this anger.
Well, that's really what it was.
Because I mean, Greg and I both have a,
or we grew up with a very like just big tempers.
Over the top. It's like one.
Fury, all of us.
Yeah, you had it.
We both have bad, but we've got to overcome.
But once I kind of found out about my dad,
I think that made me kind of make the switch
into more of this mellow guy
because I saw what could happen if you're that other guy.
I'm trying to do that in my late 40s,
having my kid now.
Right.
Because I don't want to pass on that.
To them.
It's just, it's so embedded.
Yeah, in the 70s and 80s.
Bobby get your clothes on. Get your fucking clothes on.
We got to go then we're not going to go Santa Claus doesn't exist.
She'll die.
What?
Yeah, yeah.
Santa's not dying, and I take your pants off.
Yeah, it's too much.
It's way too much.
But it worked.
Sure.
Because it made you cry and put your pants on.
Yeah, and you got to get ready.
I feel like it works. I did did oh
Yeah, but I curse my mom
It's the same thing Joe's gonna say I didn't want to bring him up for Hindu
I was male
I real quick I gotta pay my thing what I've never heard that in a pocket
Pangs pills
Is a real rat dude cast move
I'm really more comfortable on a podcast ever than this moment. Well, I got a tip-a-waitress. I forgot yesterday. I'm a center of an moment
No, right now.
I guess.
Hey, I got a call, my wife.
Remember these numbers?
Oh, 105, 700.
Okay.
Remember it.
I got it.
What is it?
105.
700.
105, 700.
I got it.
I only got the first three.
I know.
That wasn't my responsibility the second three.
There was no way you were gonna get all those numbers. I've barely got one. There's no way your brain would allow you to stay there. I remember 100
905 rooster voice
You could have two three seven sickle selenemia
Is that it? Was that it? I got it right?
Pity I'm happy. Pity I did good. Oh daddy put me like a fox
Rick
Is that Rick?
I'm going on I'm gonna go here I
Rock car you have stop it. I put the wrong car in where's Rick?
Who are you?
Michael James please don't do that, too. I don't like it
Sprink who are you?
He's doing he's doing Rick and Evelyn just let it go. Who's it? If you go, man, sometimes I just let my mind speak what it wants. That's what's happening.
I'm sorry. Let's go.
So, your father was in your father wasn't Yakuza in the mob. I mean, not that it's over done
and whatever. I mean, can I say the one?
Maybe, maybe if this is the 90s, the mob, I'd be more interested. Because now it's so
saturated mob movies and the mob. Yeah. So getting in the mob and dad's dad cussing the mob it's
like well so Prano's really killed it.
And then Giuliani came in and took out the mob.
There's not even a an Italian section in New York anymore.
There's one guy.
Yeah, one guy who is one mob guy.
I'm the mom collecting from one deli.
I'm Mike mob. I'm Mike mob
Mike my mom I'll take care of you. Give me some money from the register. Oh Mike. All right
What was the one thing before you did Mike mob? Well, it's everybody loved. Yeah
What was the thing they were like oh can I say this thing? Yeah, the thing that that one family said about your dad. Oh, well, yeah, because they were like, um, they were, uh, they were a crime family in North Jersey that
was like a family that, uh, a larger family was like, yeah, they're too crazy. Like we
don't hang on one second. I have to change the car to a Ford rain. Rick. Do you want
to do it? It's parked on the thing when are you here if you are in Rick
Why are you wearing gloves?
No, I will I just want to eat my dinner
I was gonna sit down
You're left your shoes on in the house. I'm not happy about it. Rick. Where's Rick? I should just park the lot
It's on six to have between you know
I should just prank them a lot. It's on Sixth Ave between, you know.
It's gonna be Rick and Evelyn.
She asked, where's Rick?
It really doesn't go back.
I go back.
Okay.
Yeah.
Who's called?
Who?
Oh, probably debt collectors because I, who?
I'm like a debtor.
Oh, debt collectors.
Yeah, I'm like a debt collector.
I'm like a debt collector. I'm like a debt or oh debt collector Decle letters
There
How funny if if deck letters could freeze you and carbon
That's the thing I hated about Star Wars it ever showed all the people calling Han for the debt
Hi, this is Gary
Hanho
No, no, this is his brother by the whole movie. He's like the gap
Hi is mr. Han Solo
Available who is this hi is this
No, who is this yeah is this I would like is this you
It's so funny everybody else is like why is Han the only guy in the galaxy without a phone
It's so funny everybody else is like why is Han the only guy in the galaxy without a phone
Why didn't they have phones They didn't have cell phones no because it's a galaxy far far away. Yeah, yeah, it was a long time ago a long time ago
Yeah, it's the past a lot of people forget that I guess that they really saved he saved himself a lot of explaining to do yeah
Yeah, yeah
planning to do. Yeah, because we would be like, yeah, doesn't make sense.
Not quantum fix it. I tell you one of my favorite things about
Star Wars. I saw this the other day. Yeah, I was watching, I was
watching, you know, Obi-Wan, right? And he was like, looks like
dude, what the fuck? Whoa, I didn't say it. I did. You said it.
You said it. All right, well, then give me a sexy beat. Yeah,
hit him was something
Now please don't swear again
Around 20 minutes. Oh I could do it. I'll say this about this but greatest praise you ever made no curtains
20 minutes. Oh, I could do it. I'll say this about this but greatest choice you ever made no curtains
What's going on the world is like why is there a half-fake in man with very bad eggs?
Taking his clothes off of another man in front of a microphone
Some kind of sex ring going in there. I know it. There's no host. It seems to be run like a parliament
Everyone that equal position. Today. We have strip podcasts every time somebody swears You lose a piece of clothes
Oh
My god, dude. This is the best. Yeah, this will be way better for those girls
I'm on YouTube. I'm just too hairy Italian
Just mushy bodies. I'm it gonna push up in 30 years. I should have done this with the tail lane and
Anybody else anybody and you don't do any blot neck would have been great. Yeah, I can't
Count it count it. He's already hard. Look at him
Please I can be like at that them shorts off of that
I'll say this I always wear two pairs of socks though, so oh really no
Those are the comforts that other people do in my break out. All right, let's go what well I'm for you Sanwear two pairs of socks because it sweats too much and then I'm itching
Yeah, I understand. Is that one anything? There's a sock test
I keep a fork in my car
You keep a fork and you car to chisel your feet.
Yeah, and any more, I've gotten better.
So crazy.
You're never know when you somebody in my past,
you're a meatball or you're ex-impleared.
That was a big contention.
My wife is one of the greatest humans was ever
who puts up with so much stuff.
Nice.
She, be careful, man.
Yeah, yeah.
You man, you were right on the line.
Yeah, yeah, she puts up with so much stuff much stuff and she with the one time she really got mad
She was like you can't put your eggs in the fork in with the regular for why would you why would she have tell you that?
Why would anybody?
I have to tell you that you can't put the fork that you scrape your disease with, with the forks we use to eat ham.
You're doing hot food, it cooks it like a syringe.
It's like a hot syringe.
This is like a life philosophy, you know what I mean?
The energy color, the energy gender,
the support, you just see the same thing.
It's a very progressive man.
Most progressive, it was so disgusting.
It's so funny.
I did say you're a very good person. First of all, why do you have to wash it? Yeah, most progress is so disgusting. It's so funny.
I did say you're your favorite.
Why do you have to wash it?
How much excess stuff getting on the fork?
You got to wash it, because you don't want to.
Can't you just wipe it?
You don't want to eat, you want to wipe it,
and they need meatballs?
No, but have, isn't that, can't you just have,
don't they make an exima of foot fork somewhere?
We have three forks.
Why don't you, that's the company for it.
Listen, you have a company comes, I've got the company for it. Listen, you haven't had any come side.
You haven't had this show called Shark Tank.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Why don't you come up with it?
Examine forks.
An examine forks.
So, I mean, that would be so good.
I was there.
Two sided.
And one side for really, when it's really bad.
Yeah, yeah.
Turn it over for the teeth.
Yeah.
And an extender.
So you can do it like when you're on the road and driving.
Yeah, how about this?
An extender and also make it black.
So you can put it like nobody sees it when you're doing it.
So if it's on your pants or something like that.
I would say do like ammo, so it's more fun.
You know, like you can have a little style-ish.
Yeah.
You can match your outfit.
Yeah, that's pretty good.
And you can take off the top, make it a selfie stick. You take a photo with it. Yeah, and go for a outfit. Yeah, it's pretty good and you could take off the top making a selfie stick
You take a photo with it. Yeah, go for broke it plays music to I don't hate you know
In there everyone I'm scratching it's
Song is that that's a tetris song oh
You don't like Tetris I do like testers, but not that much to know the song
Why yeah, so I don't like somethingris? I do like Tetris, but not that much to know the song.
So yeah, so in order to like something you have to know it's theme song.
Dude, three companies. Did you like the show? I loved it. What's the theme song? Three's comedy, too.
You know what? Dr. Roper? What about mash?
Mash? Mash?
I saw the greatest week of their day. Someone was like, if you go up in my age and mash came on, Bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-im-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-bim-b The potman here you scass Sanford and son
Having some fun to dad's having a good time. It's not two dads right Sanford and son
That's a two-dad show. No, it's not really son and the father red fox red fox and his father son son
They were to my big dummy. Yeah
They were too much big dummy. Yeah, the sun show.
We're gonna judge.
And they always argued because they would be like,
no, I'm the dad and he was like, no.
He was the dad.
Who dad?
They argued because the Lamat was a big dummy.
Yeah, big dummy.
I remember, it was great.
He was a big dummy.
A dad.
No, he was not a dad.
We probably would be the difference, son.
They would take turns being the son.
Is that why they were born dads at all. You're at him. Yeah.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Mr. Belvedere.
Mr. Belvedere?
Yeah.
How about Silverhawks?
Silverhawks.
Silverhawks.
How about Silverhawks?
You can't just say what you're in there.
He's like the ones I ever got with you.
All right.
Well, how about Demi Lovato?
Demi Lovato, the woman?
Yeah, she didn't have her own show.
So let me ask you a question.
I'll ask you a question.
I'll ask you a question.
Okay, so your father died.
Is he gone?
Your father's, you have this beautiful relationship with him.
He just closes all heck, right?
And can you stop doing that?
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Hand touched everything.
Yeah.
I get real fingering. sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Yeah, my dad calls me like almost like every day. Oh, no, no stuff.
What stuff?
I said no stuff instead of like, but,
yeah, stuff.
Yeah.
No, man.
I said, no, instead of cursing, he said no stuff.
No stuff.
Yeah, instead of,
what?
Instead of, you got it right?
Oh, no stuff.
Yeah, no stuff.
Instead of, instead of,
I know, in the other word.
Oh, the other word, eating curse. Yeah, two points for you
Thank you. You could put a sock on your head
You get it's funny because it's you can always tell on this podcast when the coffee crashes for me
Yeah, because my brain just goes
He's saying stuff. Do you think do you think that?
Do you think that, do you think that,
have you ever run into these mob people at all?
No.
So you've just gone out of that life.
Yeah, we're gone.
They left us alone.
Do you think that you would have been in that life
if your dad was still around?
Yeah.
And it was still a player in that world.
Do you think you would have been involved?
I think so.
And you think you definitely wouldn would be friends with this queen
i'm his protector
but there's no way his father you would have got a killed no i was left to
protect anthony that is my job
like to buy it is now it is uh... that his father's dead and not around to tell
you to beat it's not his most mob guys, this is true fact. Frate of fact?
True effect.
Is that real?
It's true fact.
Google it, flip.
True effect, most mob guys are afraid of my sexuality.
So they won't come in within five feet of Anthony.
Yeah, because they don't whistin' around.
But Anthony, I mean, I'm correct in saying that
if your father was still around,
you would be a different person.
Probably a little violent, probably.
You're small too, so you'd have that little complex.
And that going on.
You definitely have a better haircut.
Sure.
I would close.
Yes.
And you wouldn't really probably be friends
with this gentleman over here who's a sweet person.
I don't want to live in a world where this is you.
I don't even like to talk about this.
In every reality, everything is my best friend. Every single one.
A few so acknowledge it different.
Who's calling it out?
You were Bill's domain?
I don't know.
Let's find out.
Yeah.
Hello.
Oh, my mom.
Oh, my mom.
I should dad do it another character.
You have no idea how well you know my dad.
That's what he's been preparing this character for an hour.
Just honing in.
Lure Jeffies.
I got these people.
I ordered one thing of Ali Express.
Oh.
And now they won't stop calling me.
Ali Express?
Ali.
Ali, was that not?
Ali, Ali, Ali, Ali Ababa.
Strongest 10 men.
He's a God-man.
Not all about men.
Something about men. Right, something about men. Is there a god man all about men. Something about men.
Right, something about men.
Is that a third nipple on your nipple?
I got a thing, I don't know what it is, I was gonna cause them, buddy.
You are screaming.
I said to come on, he said it's not a third nipple, he said it's a normal thing that most men have.
What?
I've got a protuberance.
Oh.
A lot of protuberance.
It's a medical.
I went to medical school for-
You're a protuberance. Yeah, man school for you're a protuberance. Yeah
So you didn't go to medical school. I did I did seven years. No, you didn't
He worked in a hospital for that long. I did walk into hospital
You didn't so you didn't work at a medical you weren't I worked in a ER for five years
But you didn't go to medical school. I went to medical school for seven years in Beijing
There was I said I want to medical school for seven years in Beijing. I said, I want to learn your ways.
And they took me on as their seventh son.
I can't do this to the people that listen to this podcast,
because they're not going to know the truth.
What is the truth?
Truth is what you say enough that you think it's real.
And if I want to be a doctor, I'm going to go to medical school.
I'll just tell myself I went to medical school for the next three years.
And one day I'll forget it didn't happen
What's the difference between can you push the button?
Yeah, what's the difference between oh, he's got it. Oh, it's my friend. That's yeah, I hope it's a female looking to up her levels
What she's gonna come in and see me and she's gonna be like, oh, I'm up If someone comes, if anybody come, if the owner of this place comes in here,
this is the end of the body.
And then it gets mine, I get choked down.
If anybody wants to be,
it sees your baby chest.
Baby.
When they come in,
they're gonna think it's the 80s again.
Oh, character comedy.
Oh, it's great.
And the way our man,
our new song I just went under the ladder.
He's dead.
He went under the ladder.
That's great. Underwear man. Under a man. Hey everybody get up side Under the ladder
Underwear man under a man everybody get up side and it's cool to the bill boys
So I'm gonna get back to you. Yes. I'd love to this way more interesting. It's fine. I don't want to get back I've never seen someone who left the crack more than me and you
Is right there's nothing funny. I know he's insane. Thank you, but did it work out?
They allow me to be me, that's what I like.
Yeah, I know, yeah, it is.
So back to Beijing.
Did you just see Greg?
No, he said back to Beijing.
Hey, let me ask you a question.
So that would be a real thing though,
you wouldn't probably hang out with Greg.
No, I would be me.
Don't say that.
Stop.
Let's move past it.
Why?
I don't wanna think about that. Listen, it. Why I don't want to think about that
Listen, it's just a thought it's not a good thought, but it's not your real life. You are friends in real life
I can't entertain that idea
Stop well Greg also sees, you know, I don't want to speak for Greg but Greg sees every reality as a possible reality
Yeah, so why you saying it's not real it could be somewhere else that's exactly there's a world somewhere where there's a Greg stop watching this
EW
Stop watching all the
Arrow super girl all the universe's kid. There's no alternate universe with Greg where he's an evil evil mafia man
And you know just a silly boy that loves dance. I don't like the same block. I agree
I don't like to believe that exists. No, it doesn't. This is the reality we're in also in that reality
Where you're a where you're a major mob player sure Greg is just Nathan Lane
Yeah, we're both destined to become what we really are
Actual Nathan Lane
I mean is your mom now your mom married this guy?
So she must be pretty tough.
Not really.
I mean, my mom is like pretty shy.
Oh, really?
Okay.
But they kind of, yeah.
Wow, she's kind of like Adrian.
She is like Adrian.
Yeah.
I think it helps to have someone like that because then they're not going to put up a fight
again. You know what I mean? If you're like, Hey, this is my life. This is what I do. They're not going to put up a fight again. You know what I mean?
If you're like, Hey, this is my life.
This is what I do.
They're not going to be like, Well, I'm not cool.
What's a young and a young?
What do you mean?
I'm a young.
Oh, yes.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, he just got offended.
He turned to do.
No, I'm.
I'm.
What are you mentioning?
His.
I'm sorry.
We could see Anthony going to the darkness.
Yes.
No.
No, I like what's the middle of this?
What?
This podcast is going to end in'm sorry. What did him? What? What did him understand?
This podcast is going to end in a hit. A what?
A hit.
Someone's going to get hit.
Someone's, well, I already got slapped three times
because it's stupid game.
I almost swear.
I almost swear.
Yeah, you were close.
Oh, you're close.
I don't even hear curses anymore.
Really?
That's how much I curse.
You want to see my weiner?
Yeah.
No.
Is that what you want to say?
Just say it.
Say you want to see my weiner. I'll Is that what you want to say? Just say it.
Say you want to see my weiner, I'll show to you.
I'll show to you.
Something about a grown man.
Yeah.
You want to see my weiner?
I don't like his threat either.
He made this all thing to us.
You want to see my weiner?
Is that what you want?
It was too aggressive and too good at the same time.
We were fun.
Now he makes it about, yeah, is this what this is about?
You guys just cut to the chase. Yeah, I want a prison guy is like, yeah,
suck my weener
Weener
I love that there's someone who's like yeah, the most interesting thing I've ever heard of podcasts is that I think
He's three dose dad is in the mob, but they just keep coming back to some naked guy. I would
I was having any other way. Yeah. We did.
Yeah, I totally would have been,
because he was that, you know what I mean?
Like, I, without their influence,
he might have been me, you know, in a weird way.
Wow.
It's funny how, when, is very important
when a kid is young, what influence he has,
where he's from, because you're absolutely right.
Look at you, you're, I mean, you're looking,
you're a nerdy kind of cool, funny, goofy, silly guy. Yeah. You know, I mean, look, you had
that in you. You know, but I would be funny to see what you would have been like, if,
you know, you would have been, you would have been a little, you could see kind of how tough
you'd be. Yeah. You you know, well when I was younger
I think I want to this mob guy's out there. They just have silly in them
They're just fighting it like not not not not not not being gay, but they're just silly like yeah, of course
I know what you want to be silly, but they can't yeah, yeah, that would suck
Horrible they come like you know to the sit down or whatever and they're like is it you know, they're like I thought of this bit
Yeah, what I mean like that must happen must happen yeah but they can't ever say that
the four families gonna meet but first I want to show you a magic trick yeah I have a passion
where is this card yeah me guys how you do you stole my guard and they also shoot each other
I want to thank all the families for sitting down uh uh did you see they got a new
the family's just sitting down.
Did you see they got a new? Yeah.
There's a new movie coming out.
So excited.
Yeah.
What?
I mean.
I've seen the new duct tails.
Yeah, like just to have it in your brain all the time.
You can sacrifice your sacriote,
sitting in the back row,
bump, and a jam.
I feel like you can never do it.
It was all Angelo had frozen on ice with no children.
Yeah, it was obviously.
Yeah, right.
Just could never be silly.
You have to be hard.
Yeah.
Now, that'd be a great character.
I guess they did do it.
The joke or whatever, but just a't know. I don't know.
I'm silly mom guy.
Oh, like a silly mom.
Just a murderer, just, yeah.
He was going to do it.
What was your dad was at?
What was your dad was just silly like you?
I didn't, he just murdered people.
I kind of think he was a little bit,
because my mom would tell me stories about him.
She'd be like, he was very funny,
and he would sing to me all the time.
Really?
So I think maybe there was like a touch of it.
That's why I can't.
Don't sing it.
Because he was silly.
He was in a meeting.
Yeah.
He's too much.
I love the mob guy.
He was like, just too much.
He won't shut up.
I can't take.
He keeps singing these songs.
The mob guy like cuts someone's tongue out.
And then he's like, that was really gruesome.
He's like, give it was a bit.
Why do you were coming?
And you're gonna see it?
Because it's a joke. Like the thing, you didn't get that.
Ah, you guys don't get me.
Thanks for talking like what you like with Tommy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Next we're gonna go home and hug my son right now.
Yeah.
That's why I hug Anthony.
I'm his circuit father.
Craig is so much as a friend.
Is he really?
Yeah, I mean, Craig, uh,
raised him.
Yes, Greg calls me,
Greg calls me as much as my mom calls me.
And he sees me all the time.
Are you guys living near each other?
We live like 15 minutes away from each other.
15, it's just three for four minute walk.
If he moved any further, I would have moved to.
Really?
Yeah. You love him that much.
Yeah.
Really?
So what happens when he leaves you for show business?
I put a bullet in my head.
No, would you?
Why not?
I'll be there for you.
All right, it's a lot of work.
I text him probably three or four times.
It's a lot, but you're taking out a lot.
I'd say that Greg.
I call him the other day.
He lost his mind.
Oh, man, that I call him as he himself as a Bianco.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
No, he calls me at first of all, nine in the morning.
Like we're not comedians.
Nine in the morning goes, is this Greg? And I was like, he's like, he's Greg. And I was like, what? And he's like, who's this? And I was like, nine in the morning, like we're not comedians. Nine in the morning goes, is this Gregg?
And I was like, he's like, he's Greg.
And I was like, what?
And he's like, who's this?
And I was like, oh, this is, I said, this is Gregg's brother.
I tried to be my brother.
And then he's like, I'm trying to, he just kept saying,
I'm trying to do this the right way.
I'm trying to do this the right way.
He told me my car was used in a murder or something.
And they were like, and he was outside of my house
and they were picked the door and, but it was 9 AM.
My mind was, I was like, was like I hook line sinker. I walked outside of my house
I have a beautiful deck where I like to look sketch the sunsets dressed this walked out and I saw no
Not the door and I was like you must be at the wrong door. Maybe that'll save me
But I believe did a hundred what did I say? I tell him what I said what you say? Yeah, what I screamed at you
He was I mean kill you
It was funny. I laughed the whole time I need to tell me what you said you threatened to kill me oh I believe the other words it's a game of chess here
yeah literally three minutes left and your your wang is gonna whip out. Yeah.
Check off the story with Fini and Evan,
that prank was so funny.
Can you tell you what he did to me?
So I have this crazy obsession with packages.
Like if I see a package, my mind goes,
Fini's a nightmare with pranks.
Yeah, it's a lot.
Yeah, he gets into it.
Yeah.
He uses all his parents' money.
He's real, right? Got to be with me. Yeah, he has skin like that. Yeah, what do he uses all his parents money He's right
Yeah skin like that. Yeah, when he gets you know like a lot of dresses like yeah, yeah
So I see set one of us driving a boat. I'm like he's got money
He was on his little thing this we just not so long ago just driving a boat
It's like there was a Boston whaler or something like yeah, like that has money
I've never been asked to drive a boat and it's like, it was a Boston whaler or something. Yeah. And you're like, that's it. I've never been asked to drive a boat.
It's a ton of sense.
Yeah, it does.
Vini, I get crazy for packages.
If I see a name as I'm a package, 50% of my brain goes,
just take it, whatever is in it.
You can take it.
Greg has opened my packages before.
And as he couldn't take it.
I just, for like three days,
he'll leave a package closed and I'm like,
He says, hitting me?
I'm like, we've got to open this.
I'll open the package. Thank I'm like He says hitting me. I'm like we've got to open this
Man, so I go crazy and and so it's a battle for me constantly did not just steal the mail
I get like I understand pedophiles now like
Let him go like get it like if it's aware of this that's what's in your mind
Like that's what there if I can barely hang on with packages
These guys that's like a thousand times worse
Yeah, it's like there's always a GoPro when they open that box
Everything they open to new iPhone
Yeah Everything they opened the new iPhone Yeah
Look at the Fini so so legitimately Fini were at the coffee shop
Fini walks in the bathroom my phone rings I answer it and he goes this is he goes This is you PSI'm outside I
Slam down the phone and just ran out of the coffee shop left my computer
left my jacket it was freezing ran as fast as i could they're calling me on
face time like as they're like feeney they got it he recorded him coming out
of the bathroom he's like where's Greg and Evan who Evan Williams was there he
was like no he just took off i don't know why and he was like i called him
he said it was you be as but there was zero seconds of thinking i ran three blocks
the freezing cold had an Esma attack,
had to walk back and they're laughing at me.
They're like, I just said UPS doesn't even call you.
UPS doesn't call and be like, I'm outside.
You have asthma too.
Oh, I have asthma.
You have those feet and asthma.
Yeah, I got a lot.
And that nipple thing.
It's a nipple thing I didn't stick you to reveal.
The nipple thing is,'s a nipple thing I didn't take you to reveal. Nipple thing is, who's that?
Hello.
Um.
Yeah.
We were up with John Boyce.
Did you, Jesus.
So I'm gonna switch, I'm gonna.
I gotta ask you something before you switch.
Sure.
Did you know we have a few women in this?
Yeah.
You have it.
Kevin me.
It's Bob.
I can't show.
I'm the captain now.
The naked captain demands him the host.
I gotta do my commercials.
Go ahead.
Did you know Kevin Meeney?
Yeah, I knew him.
Yeah, I loved him.
That's what you wanted to say.
He was like a song and dance guy like us.
Yeah, well, he was. He was like a song and dance guy like us. Yeah, well, yeah, he was.
He was very, that's not right.
Well, it's funny, he had such a great life
because he came out of the closet
and finally got to be himself.
And his family loved him and people loved him
and nobody cared.
And so the last, I guess, whatever year
and then he was on hairspray and he did. He was on hairspray.
He had a guy.
And no, no, no, he,
he was in the musical.
I said, he should,
Oh, I thought you meant like he was,
that's why.
Jack and hairspray, some kind of new way.
No, but he does.
Yeah, a term you've never heard.
Yeah, I don't know man, like some designer drugs.
So he, yeah, it sucks.
And what sucks is that he went,
I mean, I guess it's good for him.
Who?
Him because he went to sleep and didn't wake up.
It's not like that's what.
It's not like suffering.
Right, you know, suffering.
And it was quick, it was over, which is, you know.
I know it was holding.
I liked him.
I loved him.
Oh, you King, are you did?
I mean, I will just say something.
I did, I just did.
I did.
I did.
Now coming in here with those big pants.
We're not big pants people?
Good on their little pants.
That's not right.
One day someone's gonna put a nail in that microphone.
You'll poke your eye out.
I did, that was a medley of his bits.
You ever do a medley of your own bits?
That's what I do.
I don't stop talking. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I love him. I want to switch gears a little bit. You have any more dead people you want to bring up
to your admire?
Yeah, my daddy.
I don't know if you know this.
Your dad is not dead.
I just talked to the Lunatic at Lolls.
He died in St. Joseph's Hospital
of the worst case of gay, they've ever seen.
They've seen him all day.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't really understand this is ridiculous.
I'm not a dad. I get my number. Oh, I gave it to him. I said, call him. I don't really understand this is ridiculous. I'm not a dad.
Get my number.
Oh, I gave it to him.
I said call him.
I listen.
I said, Bobby needs a dad and he's swung in like cars and.
I so do.
Every dad I've had.
Dude, I swear, my dad will be your daddy as no problem doing that.
I can't do your dad.
He's so much fun.
So, this week, he's a Honda Rho.
I'm a pussy. This week is a Honda road
Your kids in the back is what I'm saying
This weekend we were in Chicago at the patio theater with creeps with kids nice and
Well, I mean Chicago both shows this weekend were awesome
Bergen pack Friday was smoking and but Chicago was off the chain,
packed out thousands of something people,
it was so messed up though, because,
I mean, it's called Creeps to Kids.
I mean, it's not like with new comics,
it's for headliners.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There's no middle-air, there's no MC.
It's for guys going up who've got,
we have our college degree in stand-up comedy. We're masters degrees in what we do. We know
what that would do. And it's just a great show. And Voss hosts, you know, and Voss, and then
it's quarantine, and then it's Brandon, and then it's me. That's the way the shit. And then
we all come back out together at the end
and pretty much answer some questions
but smash each other.
It's just crazy, fun.
So, you have Vos's 10 minutes into his set the other night.
And this couple just gets up and leaves
and this woman screams at him,
and calls him a racist.
What?
And then it goes on the internet the next day,
it just goes on a tirade, her and this husband.
And I was just like,
and they tried to get into other theaters,
and they were like, it's just racism, it's not funny,
and they tried to hashtag it.
Like when you hashtag something to me,
you're trying to hurt somebody.
You're trying to get people to hate people.
Or not like people.
Right, you're trying to get other people to work.
Yeah, if you're just saying,
if you're just saying to somebody,
I don't like what you said,
I think it's like, okay, fine.
You're like, okay, when you hashtag it,
you're trying to get those people, when you hashtag racism, I're trying to get those people,
when you hashtag racism,
I'm trying to create a brand.
You're trying to get somebody,
you're trying to let a fires what you're trying to do.
And you know, and it's just like,
and then you know, they actually went through this whole act
or the things and you're reading it like,
he's a absolute racist.
Absolutely, if there's no question about it.
There's no question about it that his jokes are racist.
Because I have three daughters, one of them dates of black guy.
I talked to two of them.
It's just, you know, and the final thing
is when he turned to the black security guy and
said, what do you have an ankle bracelet on?
And it's like, okay, I get it.
But if it's a fat guy, you're going to tell a fat ball guy, you know, are you sitting?
You got to talk on your pocket.
You're going to say something to him.
If it was a woman, you're going to say, you just look at for stuff to say.
And he does do racist jokes or race jokes,
but he's a Jew.
Right, right.
I mean, right.
He's a Jew.
He was, his people were fucking, fucking fried.
Yeah.
You know, fried.
I mean, he's not right.
Well, everybody's racist.
Sure, right. Black people, my black friends are racist. Well, everybody's racist. Sure.
Right.
Black people, my black friends are racist.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, this is the way it is.
And okay, if you say I'm out of here, just leave.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I get it.
You don't like the comedy you saw in the first 10 minutes.
Understood.
Mm-hmm.
But you'll try, so what you want to do is you want everybody
to hate.
Everybody, you want to say it's to hate. hate everybody you want to see is to hate so you got angry you
Yeah, yeah, man, what's crazy is that like hang on
Just take your body out
Did you scurs or you go for fun?
Hell counts?
No, it doesn't count.
Oh, thank God.
Can I just say this soft, cause if I have to get this soft,
I might pull a hammy.
This soft.
Count this off.
Yeah, let's do that way.
Count it as off.
It's fine.
Count it off.
It's tough, it's tough.
Oh, thank God.
I just don't understand it, man.
And it's so funny.
Because yes, he did racist jokes,
but they're in the name of how silly racism is.
Yes, yes.
I have three daughters.
Yes.
One of them, they're two black, I talked to two of them.
He is so proud of his daughters.
Right.
He loves his daughters so much.
Yeah.
Do you really, now you have to sit there as an adult and say does he really not talk to his daughter so much. Yeah. And you really, now you have to sit there as an adult
and say, does he really not talk to his daughter
that I, and if you just come up with the conclusion,
yes, then you're an idiot.
As an adult, you have no common sense.
Yeah.
That's it.
And that's a thing too.
Like, could secretly in my head, I'm a little worried
about like, oh, that joke about dying of gay, right?
It's like, is someone going to be offended?
It's like, no, it's like so silly. I'm trying to be that but I mean that maybe some of that years terribly offensive
I mean
Like I'm literally I made this face
So we can edit me going
When you like if you have a book something someday and they cut to the show
I'm just going they go even the host of the show who's usually pretty crazy, didn't like this show.
Yeah.
But the thing is, my friend, he's a little race.
Brake stone of heart.
Yeah.
Yeah, the, yeah.
I thought you met the band and I was like,
I love that band. And then I get a heart
That's yeah, because you stole a heart. Yeah, no, that's on me. This is on me. I'm laughing at myself for being an idiot
I'm picking that I thought the band. I mean, but I made this video
The not in make it but the we had this awesome photographer. What's his name again almost?
Almost
Oh, the one in there. Yeah, I yellow. Did you mean I? Almost pepper. Almost. Oh, not him. Oh, the one in there.
Yeah.
I yellow.
Jimmy. I almost pepper.
Great. Yeah.
I'm McMullen. It's Toby McVollon. He is.
He's just. He's just awesome.
Yeah.
He's just awesome.
And he's just he's just amazing.
Okay. And he produced this thing. And I in the middle of it, I'm telling the story
about back in the day, me and my friend Jamie, who's shredded tagging guy, total, we just jacked.
And we were way out in the woods in the Hampshire.
Like in the middle of fall, I was cold at night and windy.
And you like that?
I know you did.
I know you did your sleep.
It's your sleep. To details. So, we met these two mountain girls.
What?
Hang on, that's to be the details.
It was off season.
Who's that?
You know what I mean?
It was two mountain girls.
What was big like big J?
Yeah.
It was a big girl.
And there was another one blonde,
but she had like a hair lip.
I don't know, she was something, right?
So, he looked up at the better looking one,
and I was in the back seat sitting there
with the shoulder monster from Bugs Bunny,
and he turned back, and he was like,
come on man, he was doing stuff like this, girl.
Front and I, he was like, dude, come on, have sex with her.
And she looked at me, she was like, yeah, I wanna,
I wanna have sex.
She said another word, the F word.
Sure, so I was like, all right. So fun.
She was like, I want to have fun. So we started to have fun. And then he turned the light on and
looked back. He goes, dude, I was kidding.
You're funny. He heard them out. I was like, what? You serious? He's like, no, you nuts.
She goes, let's finish. And I was like, so I told this in this story. And Colin Quinn was like, you shouldn't put that out there.
Really?
Because of the, you know, because of that's going to offend people.
Yeah.
So you didn't put it up there, but then you said it was okay.
I did not, I did not, well, he, well, I mean, I don't,
it's a weird thing.
It's like, I go, what am I waiting for?
I'm like, well, who am I waiting to look at?
I can't, who am I waiting to? So okay, you got you got people who
are politically correct and just do nice little things and they have their people, right?
And then you got guys like Lewis Gomez doesn't care about anything. He's got his people. What am I supposed to be in the middle and no man's land?
What to say?
Yeah, hang with us.
What are we with the silly boys? Yeah, what a great group the silly boys
Then you go like then someone says he said something racist
He also tried to make an invention of rope attached to a penis the jerks you often you walk like
Yeah, that's not no, that's not a curse. That is a potty word. No, yes jerks you off jerks
Now you can't say the right word is match to bait.
That's, no, that's match to bait.
That's technical.
Try to get it out.
If you, if you have Siri,
if Siri knows what that is, you're off the hook.
You ready?
Siri, Siri, Siri.
Siri, hello, Siri.
Siri.
Fuckin'.
Oh!
Hello, Siri. Siri.
Fuck it.
Oh!
All right, we're gonna wrap up the show.
Wrap it up.
It's super very long.
People are gonna say, wrap it up as you take your panties off.
All right, hey, what do you got Anthony?
I'm doing one man show, stand-up-be-kind of thing.
About your dad?
My dad. Really? So that's why you can't talk about it
You don't know you want people to buy tickets?
I mean it's a week at the creek man
My ticket show up. I'll be thrilled dad's gonna be there
Okay, that sounds interesting. I wish if I'm around I might come see that. Oh cool, man. Yeah, I would love that
Uh, it's not gonna happen. I didn't think so, but it was a great offer. I was
I was probably you know you wanna go yeah, I'm gonna be there. I mean night you think I'm gonna be all right
Whatever you were I gonna be I can't wait till it gets married and things moves to like Arkansas
Yeah, I would love to be like little rock sounds great
There you go. Where are we? Where are you go. Yeah, it's my best friend.
You know what?
I love the love you have, man.
Get those panties off.
Yeah, hang on.
I love panties as well.
Don't show the candy.
What are you doing?
Those pantomiming.
Put them on the table.
They got to go on the table.
I can't take my blood hole out again.
You play the game. You played it to win. You played the table. I can't take my blood hole out again. You play the game. You played it to win
way to game. You're right. And is that the type of man you are? The man. This is oh, Bobby,
this is how I own this podcast. This is how because you know, if you force me to take my penis
out, then I'm going to sue you and then I'm going to sue everybody. I'm just wow. I'm gonna sue you and then I'll Oh, you're gonna sue everybody. Wow!
I'm gonna sue you.
I'm gonna sue you.
I'm gonna sue you.
What a fight.
But can I just say something?
I'll take my dick out.
No, I don't stop saying that.
What?
That's not what I want.
Can we take my dick out?
Get out of the loose, stop saying that.
Get out of the loose.
Why did we do all this?
You literally, we got to the end and you messed up and we're ending the fight.
This is the biggest finish.
It was.
Well, the big finish is that I get naked. And then that's all on the internet. This is the biggest finish. This was the end. It was.
Well, the big finishes that I get naked,
and then that's on the internet.
And then I like that.
You're not gonna get naked on.
What's gonna happen, my friend?
I'm gonna show it, no.
I have to show it.
You can't show it.
You can't, I'll take it.
Okay, I'll take it.
But wait, no way for your, wait for your hat.
Wait for your hat.
Wait for your hat.
Why would I?
Don't show anything.
Make sure nothing's on there, okay?
Yeah.
Oh, that's a technical manual.
No, I'm going to take my own away. No, you don't have to. I'm gonna take it off. I do not want you to do that. I, that's a 10-man you want. Do you have any of these?
I'm going to take my underwear.
No, you don't have to.
I'm going to take it off.
I do not want you to.
I know you don't want it.
I guess you will.
But against the wheel is what makes me want to do it.
Oh, you really put those tables.
What else do you get?
What else do you get?
This is what gets me going.
I was just going to see that December 9 through the 14th at 7 p.m.
At the creek.
All right, buddy.
What do I got there, Michael?
Well, this is your last weekend of the creeps with kids
Yeah, last weekend for this year
Mm-hmm and then we go back out we got new tour dates were announcing very soon
Creeps with kids calm or creeps tour dot com. Please go to it sign up for the Instagram and
YouTube page what's the YouTube page?
Bapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapap page what's the YouTube page? I just want to cover my penis with my shoe. The saddest thing I've ever heard in my life, my shoe around my penis.
I just want to cover my penis with my shoe.
Wait for your ads.
Oh, alright.
I got a crazy kids love the YouTube ads.
Crazy kids. Yeah, what is it? Crazy kids. The YouTube page. A couple kids. A couple kids.
Yeah, what is it?
A couple kids.
All right, great.
What else we got?
Well, you're going to be at the comedy on Satan, Madison, Wisconsin.
Yeah.
Number 5th through 7th.
Great club.
I love that, Chris.
Great family.
Great place.
Great family.
What else?
The comedy connection in Rhode Island.
Love that club.
Those guys are the best.
Those are good guys.
You're also going to in a rubah in December
Are you gonna be with what's his name is that a rubah yeah rubare rubare yeah
Twenty thirty twenty-five how many works? Oh, it's gonna be awesome So I got some lovely dates coming up. Please join me at some of these venues
I'm gonna be doing my best to make you and your loved one laugh
Robcat live comma please patreon. I love you guys you guys are really kicking it if you're not a member become a member
We we
We just look at you plug your dates for the corner my eye. I just see slowly underwear ship
Don't look at me we uh don't get me off your Instagram wait I'm gonna get it from here we uh uh uh
how about us you have a rock of gildon those are great these are gildons
don't get down in the pier.
My bloating is showing.
He lost it.
It's Mothadel.
Greg lost the game.
I'm strip podcast where he swore a little too much potty mouth.
I know.
And, uh, can I put this on me now?
Wait, you're going gotta give your heads naked.
Get my ad naked.
Where are you gonna be?
Where are you gonna be?
Where are you gonna be?
I'm gonna be in a European sex cult.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
From nine to five the next 10 years.
I put my hours in.
Where are you going?
Yeah.
Where are you gonna be?
Where am I gonna be?
Mentally?
I'm so m-
Broken.
Confidence in those selfs. As soon as they're working. Where are you gonna be mentally Confidence and those helps
Where where are you
I'll be the habit there the laugh laugh it up in Bogota
Tell you I don't know my dates and I'm too scared to grab my phone because I'll drop the shoe
So go to my website
Because I'll drop the shoe. So go to my website, lemonparty.com.
No, my website is Greg F. Stone.com.
I just made it real, so it works now.
You made it real, right?
Yeah.
Oh, thank God.
All right, so here we go.
Thanks.
You all gonna see it when I get up.
You know when the cameras go off, I'm gonna dance around naked, so you have to deal with this.
No, the cameras don't go off.
Well, they're gonna go off.'re not they don't go off i
have to do my questions to my patreon patreon dot com size robber kelly i want
to thank you guys all the new members we're gonna do the questions again i hope
you like in this question stuff we have a new tech talk coming up this week
where i talk about my favorite bag it's uh... one i traveled with last year
side cop sling the day sl, they have a new one,
2.0, we're gonna be talking about that on the Patreon
and our Cruiser Kids, there you go.
What else?
Follow Robert Kelly.
Oh, really live.
Robert Kelly live?
Yeah, on the screen, yeah.
Follow.
My Instagram.
Yeah, what is it?
Tint of Intel it.
Yeah, sure.
I don't know it.
I think it's Accraff Stone.
Accraff?
Under score, isn't it?
No, that's Twitter. I think that's Twitter. I think that's Twitter. I think that's Twitter. And go to, I'll just do your, please. Yeah, Greg F. Stone. I think it's at under score, isn't it? No, that's Twitter.
I think that's Greg F. Stone.
And go to, I'll just do your please.
Yeah, Greg F. Bed.
Thanks, man.
Go to Greg F. Stone.
Oh, no, bad.
Now it's dirty.
Your eyes don't listen to the red dude cast and, uh, yeah.
No, you're getting light on my weiner?
No.
Don't wean me up.
I don't want the world to be a mewean.
You can't see anything.
I won't post that.
I'm not, I'm gonna take it home I don't know how to move please we will I will yeah but the cameras are
hot I'm gonna do a wrap around move what does that mean right wrap all my clothes around me like a
like a old room because they'll move.
No, they won't put one leg on.
All right.
The guild.
What they's guildin is like a sword.
You've never been.
Once it's been on sheath, it can't be you perturbed.
You've never been.
Till it's tasted come.
You've never been kidnapped.
Oh man.
Which I knew more about swords.
I'm gonna put.
All right. Let's wrap this up.
Follow the podcast at YKWD.com.
It's a great podcast.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I love you guys.
Did you like Anthony?
That's great.
You know, when you first both came on together,
was one of my favorite podcasts we've done on YKWD,
because you were so unassuming,
both of you look like you're not gonna be funny at all.
I mean, just shud rules.
I mean, you should work at a library in the back.
You know what I mean?
But I mean, two of my favorites.
I mean, I mean, that's, I mean, that we love you, man.
I love you guys, man.
You really just make me laugh. and that's why I love my podcast
I know some podcasts want to be serious some podcasts want to deal with issues
Hey, yeah, some podcasts want to want to let the world and I get it and I just can't do that
I don't know whatever I like to just have a fucking goofy funny yeah hot for an hour and a half two hours
And that's what I think my fans love.
The most compliments I get is do
when I listen to your podcast, I laugh.
He goes, I listen to other podcasts and they're funny
and they're cool, but no podcast is funny at this podcast.
I mean, we laugh the whole fucking time.
Yes, this is great.
I mean, you really let people be free,
which I think is a great thing.
Check this out, man.
Check out this.
New move.
What's that?
Are you put the headphones?
You know what I mean?
Stuff like that.
Yeah.
What do you put in a bracelet?
What is in your hand?
I gotta get the fit there.
What's in your hand?
Oh, yeah.
I'm Mike, what do you got?
Well, also the ass Bobby, the seconds are doing great.
You guys are all your questions.
Yeah, any questions you have on Patreon, you guys.
Do we have any announcements for them?
Did anybody else join this week?
Not enough to do.
When does your meditate?
Not enough to do, why would you say that?
I would say no, you.
No.
We have some people, we have to do in big chunks.
Okay, so anyways, I wanna say,
you have any questions we're gonna keep doing this?
Ask me at the Patreon, What's the email address?
AthBobby at gmail.com.
There you go.
AskBobbyatgmail.com.
You have any questions?
You become a member of my Patreon.
If you're a fan of this podcast and you want to support, it's one cup of coffee, a month,
out of your pocket, and we give you one-on-ones.
We give you the podcast early, video, and audio, and we give you these asked questions.
We give you, I mean, everything and audio, and we give you these ass questions, we give you,
I mean, everything, right?
They've been great.
All kinds of extra stuff that nobody else gets,
and a lot of these videos I put up for creeps or kids
go to you first.
So, there you go.
Yep.
Follow me on at MikeFuseWorris.
I'll be at the Gotham Company Club with Chris Stefano
thanks for being a weekend.
And the Lafayette Loudens and Antonio with Paul Verzi,
the sixth through the eighth of December.
Thank you, that's fine.
Zach, what do you got?
Zach, the new guy.
I don't know that one.
I don't know that one.
Can I just say, he's a terrific rapper.
Zach, the new guy?
Really?
Can you give us a second?
I mean, do you have any we can see right now?
Rice fields, I know every week he says, have any we can see right now? He-
I have to say, I know every week he says Zach the new guy
and that's our thing for two years.
He, I just say, what's out here,
Zach the new guy and we end the podcast.
Yeah.
But I just wanna say, where can they go to see it?
Z the dropout, if you type that Google
I'll come out on Instagram, Z the dropout underscore.
Z the dropout, go check out his rap.
I want to check it out.
He's amazing.
You got one of your songs up?
I, he is, you know, because look,
people tell you about that stuff.
I'm a singer, I'm a rapper.
It's just a rapper.
And he tells me they're a rapper.
I'm like, oh yeah, good for you.
Yeah.
Do you want to hear it?
Absolutely not.
I do not, I don't have the ability to lie to your face
when I hear you go, yo, and yo, yo, let me tell you what's up.
Let me tell you how I'm thinking. I've been drinking. I've been having stuff and my feet be stinking.
And then I go to my mom's house and she yells out, I got the cloud.
Why? Out. And I'm, uh, I'm making, making, making, making, making, make.
All right, here we go. Ready?
I'm gonna make it a Mac. Alright, here we go, ready?
Ah, you play the guitar?
Not good enough, I get some of the replays. I'm gonna like it WD
Special thanks giving addition
You guys are the best chance in the world
Thank you so much
See you after Thanksgiving don't eat too much fat sauce
Take care of yourselves. you