Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Shane Torres | Fist Fest

Episode Date: March 3, 2024

This week Bobby sits down with comedian Shane Torres to talk about Fist Fest, what you should bring to Fist Fest, and how they should go to Fist Fest. FOLLOW SHANE TORRES https://www.instagram.com/shanetorres/?hl=en https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9mHurqZh_0 Get the EXTRA YKWD, Watch LIVE and UNEDITED AT https://www.patreon.com/robertkelly LIVE FROM THE SHED AND MORE ON PATREON DUDE!!! https://twitter.com/robertkelly https://twitter.com/YKWDpodcast http://instagram.com/ykwdudepodcast https://www.facebook.com/YkwdPodcast/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

San Francisco is a city I still love going to after Spugs. I am terrified to go back. One of my favorite cities, you asked me five years ago, what's your favorite, I would say my favorite place to go in the world was Aruba and San Francisco. Yeah. And now I'm terrified to go back. New Orleans for me. I heard it was dead, deadly. I mean just sucked.

I mean it's like yeah but like I don't give a f- I like, I mean I just,, that stuff never really bothers me. Like, I mean, there's a lot of homeless people for sure. Like that's going on down there, but like, yeah, I don't love it and I feel bad for them, honestly. I hate it. I hate that they have closed stores. I hate that they let people steal with no consequence.

You're not doing them a favor. You want to give them something, go give them something. Take money out and go give them something. I're not doing them a favor. You want to give them something go give them something Take money on go give them something. I'll go help them. Do you don't just let people shit and don't let people Don't let people dead give up You know what I mean? I hate it hard man. It's not this read dude It's the one of the richest places in the world. Yes, and it's like my friend lives there He makes 220,000 come on here. He has a you know, it he has like he like he makes a crazy amount of it's not crazy But he did Palos. He's got 140 million in the bank. How'd that happen? Yeah, stop it. Yeah, baby We're starting the podcast right now

We're back. You know what dude live welcome everybody to the show Started the social media podcast Right now! We're back, you know what dude live. Welcome everybody to the show. YKW. I started the social media podcast. The fact is the YKW dude podcast. YKWD is back again. Home school, back in the day. We're all started before them all. YKW.

This podcast is so fun and crazy. And there's no rules. Run off, you're ruining this. We're the bomb dainer, man. I'm sorry, it's a comedy podcast. This isn't NPR. That's the podcast done. Is there any better show?

This is the original. Original. Original. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Hi, everybody. It's Robert Kelly. Welcome to the show. Who do we have on the show this week? We have a great comedian Shane Torres. Yeah, we can... Ludge-less. Right there you go, you look fantastic. Thank you very much. Good to see you buddy. We saw each other on

the bonfire. Yeah, but we never see each other. So it's kind of like... I feel like that's happening more and more where I see people I know for like not months or even like a year and then I see them like back to back like crazy Is his mic on I can't hear him. Yeah, I think so. Oh, there you go talking to the mic. No, yeah That's the way these things work. I have to capture your voice. I Have to capture it or it doesn't work. Yeah. Oh, well, hey, there was a good you could be an innovator though and try Just get my voice. Yeah. Yeah, and And I know and then it's just responding, but I know I put subtitles. They have to read my podcast

But only yours. I mean, that's the way the comedy is going. It's it's funny. Isn't it right? It's weird how it's evolving so fast Because of social media we have a ten minute time. I would down to eight minutes You will find out at the end of eight minutes, you will find out why. Okay, it is, I brought this up to other people. Do you worry about the sense of history in comedy with how fast it's moving now? I think comedy has become the new money making thing in this business.

I think comedy was never really a money maker. Only a few people could do it once in a while. I thought it was a good job, but it was kind of looked down upon. It was a lower rung in shows. Acting was up there. Rock and roll, musician was the mother. You got a lot of people playing the garden.

A lot of people playing Carnegie Hall. Comics are playing where bands and musicians used to play. Yeah. People are people are into comedy they're making they figured out there's like a dozen arena acts right now. They figured out how to make money off of us. So you know what it's it. Yeah. How do they do that? They, you know, I know you, you know me, here's my guy, take that guy, I'll take your person, you do this, bang, bang, you make them. It's like, you know, the record business back in the day. Yeah.

But the good thing about it is that you can become famous on your own, on the outside too, with the social media and all this stuff. You can determine your value without other people's help. You can, I think so, but you know, I mean, look how many people just release their special on YouTube and it kills it. That's a big issue I have. Like there's not, I don't think gatekeepers were always the best thing, but there was

a filter at least. There was a filter. And I don't... And they weren't always right. Yeah, no, I don't. And they weren't always right. Yeah, no, they weren't. But they weren't always wrong. And they put over a lot of bad people too. They put over bad people, but they put over really good people.

Yeah, and they gave people opportunities. Some people opportunities. I think we... Some people don't pop and that's... Well, it was good because it had a barometer. You know what I mean? But there's so much comedy used to filter itself out. It doesn't do that anymore.

No, it doesn't. No, you... but you kind of find their own audience too. You know, like, I guess, well, like, I mean, you know, like you and I are not going to be the same audience as like Taylor Tomlinson's crowd, you know, like, but, which is like, that's what I mean. Maybe certain people were underserved in the sense of coming like certain demographics, you know, but yeah, cause mean like what are they they were gonna get like Judy Tanuda like they were gonna be real Taylor's fans are really gonna be in the duty to new to with the fucking though

The accordion yeah, yeah, she was funny. She was great. All right. She died a couple years ago I wonder if she if he would hold up if she would hold her shit show. I think he would hold up to me. Yeah Yeah, I don't know why not me why I mean like I mean like like I mean I mean hold up to me. Yeah? Yeah, I don't know. Why not me? I mean, like, I mean, like, I mean, I mean to the fandom, like the person you're like, it's not all great, but you're gonna like, I do like, I do like that song or that bit, you know, that kind of vibe to it. Well, I think that in the 80s, it went through it too,

but now with social media, it's just, there's no, I think if, I think you could find a way to become successful if you really, back when I was coming up, you were funny. And there wasn't that many comics. There wasn't that many women comics. There was not that many, you know, Indian and Asian and Spanish.

There was a couple Spanish, right? There was mostly Jewish dudes and black dudes and white dudes. And there was really no chicks, few chicks. Half dozen. Half dozen, maybe, maybe. Like working, when you say comics, do you mean like they could be getting spots in the city somewhere?

Yeah, you'd be working at one of the clubs, but there wasn't that many clubs. Yeah. There wasn't that many clubs. It was, you know, around the country, in the major cities, the clubs were always kind of there. But around the, but those were like workout rooms too,

you know what I mean? But to be a working club comic, oh, you know, to be out there, there wasn't that many people to do it. There wasn't that many clubs, so there wasn't a need for it. You know, you work in, you know, the Improvs or Side Spudders or these clubs that are around or the Funny B and the chocolate huts and bananas and looney but who the fuck wants

to do that? I mean, being a road comic, a club comic back in the day was like being a shoe salesman. Yeah. It's not the, it's gotten much better is what you're saying. Well, there's money to be made now. Now these guys are doing theaters. These do, you know, you make money at a club. You can make up more money at a club than you can do in a theater. Yeah. You know, it's true. You make more money

because you don't have to pay all those fees. You have to do more work, but you know, it's a, it's a weird industry right now, but it's, it's very reminds me. I feel like we replaced music. I, I don't know about that. Think about it. it Nashville It's filled with comics, but no LA Austin Austin used to be all Dead, it was all music. It was all music, but there was always comedy there now not not not like it is now Of course not no, but that's like freakin this eight club. It's not free. It's what it we It's cheaper to bring us in and do a comedy club it's one guy two guys three guys yeah there's a microphone of the production

of the show is yeah to bring a band in as a pain in the ass yeah you know what I mean it's like it's like an easier van yous are just for having comedy now I mean I did two rock clubs this weekend dude you can sell out yeah look at you look at look at the motherhip. It's just sold out Yeah, but I mean that's like I mean that's on special circumstance Yeah, all the other clubs is selling out to they're selling you know people are coming in and going there and selling tickets Yeah, yeah, like some people I think in Nashville in Austin LA. Yeah, you know who the school to the whiskey a go-go I mean they're going to yeah, I see I see the point you're making a little bit.

What's sold out? The comedy store, the improv. They're all sold out. Right here, this used to be all music. There was one club, Comedy Cellar. Yeah. Now there's five, four. And they're opening another one.

Sold out, they're gonna be five, and they're sold out. And then they're... Go to the WAH, next door. They used to be sold out every show. The Village Underground was a music venue. Next door, it was all music. Yeah, and there's two other clubs in this neighborhood that are like living off of the run off of this place.

Buddy, come on. We took over from music. I mean, I think in a certain way. You're right. I'm Jimmy Hendrix. I'm the Jimmy Hendrix. And I'm Pat Benatar. Oh.

I'm Pat Benatar. Hit me with your best shot. I would say love is a battlefield. Love is a battlefield to go with. Love is a battle. That's the good love is a bad. What's the other one that's really good? Pat Bennett. I was a bad bit. Love is a battlefield. So we are young. Yeah, with the dance because the opening just goes. Yeah, I was sure. And we got a minute 30. Okay too What's gonna happen? You know, like you scared are excited. No, I'm the alpha in here. I'm fine in this room You think what?

Maybe not that you got here, but I mean, I think my Younger my sister with a kidney infection is the alpha in the room when I'm not here. Are you crazy? in the room when I'm not here, are you crazy? You're like a nuts dude. Yeah. No, I mean, you could be the alpha, I don't care. No, I don't either, I just don't do it by hand either. Are you nervous? No, I'm just curing.

We're at a minute, we're at a minute. I don't like that he's walking behind me now. Why? He's walking behind me. We're at a minute. The guy weighs 110 pounds, he's holding a cannon. What's he gonna do? It's a good point. What's he going to do?

How are you going to do? Yeah, what is he going to do? Fix your virus on your match. You fuck over him to my line of sight. No, he's just taking a video. That's what he does. He has autism. Don't worry. You have to, you have no fear in this room, but it's, it's 30 seconds and it's happening. Okay. It's going down. Are you excited now a little bit? No, cause I don't, are you still afraid? Okay. There's not another mic set up. So I don't think somebody else is coming in. 29 seconds. It's about to happen. Shane brother. It's about to go down 20 seconds. Are you just about to ask me a bunch of questions

or something? 19. I mean, dude, we're right there. I am we're right there dude. It's almost 10 seconds. It's almost 10 seconds 10 9 8 come on 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 Yeah Suck my fucking dick Suck it we can swear we can swear swear after 10 minutes they stop watching on YouTube. Fuckin' suck dick! Oh jeez, well I say fuck in there.

Yeah, let's go right here. But you can't say all the other bad words. You can't talk about this. Fist Fest is coming up. Have you known about Fist Fest? You really take a jump from it. This is like moving into safe harbor. Like, really? really this fest is happening

what's the way for ten minutes do we have asked pig we have hunky toys super sniffer stud fist i mean look at all these spots is friendly toys this is great it's coming up with the day daniel fist fest uh... go back let's see that photo that guy on his belly look at this uh... this year first is going to be april twenty-fifth through twenty-seven at all metropolitics entertainment complex in august to georgia nice in georgia down

the south i mean what happened to god what happened to the south of the home of the world's most prestigious golf course and this they didn't let black people drink. The masters is in Augustus, but now they let him just fucking happen. What? What is this fest? God, I know. No, I think I have a pretty good idea. Tell me what you think it is. I don't think you do. I think I hope it's on the same weekend as the masters because the, uh, oh, it is the contrast because the contrast between, man, I beg your pardon, may I have another man to fuck my piping hole harder.

I beg to differ, sir. I mean, look at this. Please whip my testicles as you see. My name is Pub Kibbles. What do we expect at Fist Fest? Read it out loud, Danny. This is from Pup Kibbles, and it's for a first-timers guide to Fist Fest.

Yes. I'm 29 years old. I'm a verse bottom pup that's into fisting, bondage, spanking, and toys. Most of the time, I enjoy laying around with my tail and my hood on. I'm currently located in North Central Connecticut. You can find me on recon, as pig, telegram and Twitter.

Where am I? I want to stop you. I know Twitter, but I've never heard of telegram. You know as you know, as big as you don't telegram is like a what is that big? Well, this was Pups first time at Fistfestest last year, and he wants you, Bobby, to know about. I want to know about it, tell me. When I first attended, when I first arrived at FistFest, I didn't know a single person.

I knew people from their online profiles and spent my first few hours trying to figure out what screen name went with each person's actual name. Despite my fears, I was surprised how friendly and welcoming, friendly, welcoming, and caring every single person at the event was. My biggest takeaway is the key to the first fist fest is to step out of your comfort zone

and introduce yourself to others. I think you did that. I think you did that when you said you were going. I think when you gave your name, what's his name? Pup Kigbills. Pup Kigbills. Yeah, I think when you put your thing on, what is it called, pup ass pig ass pig

You came out of the shell I made friends that will last a lifetime and I look over seeing them in future. Yeah, you had their knuckles in your asshole Yeah Some wedding ring is inside that is a hat that is a bonding experience. Hey, dude. You shake hands. I remember that Remember those so weird to feel it on the outside. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh god I don't have this in me. I think we should shake like that One person should stick their fist to the other person's asshole Go ahead. What do you say a good for a bunch to me?

Wait, it tells you what to pack in case we're going Shane. I think we should go I think I think we would probably do well Do we do fantastic. Look at these little fucking suckers. My bracelets could be like butt beads. They're like little door stops. Yeah, a little, ow, ow, ow. I put them, you can put them at certain places. You know like when people hang a tennis ball

in their garage when they're parking their car in the winter? That's a... Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. Stop with the beads. All right, let's go. Read it. What to pack. Okay, what to pack?

I let's look what do you think? Let's ask you what oh give me a couple items Several beach towels for cleanup. Yeah, yeah, I would say baby wipes Maybe maybe why it's a couple beach towels Maybe even a kiddie pool for the cleanup. Yeah, like you just do it in there. Just jump in, scooch your back. Okay, I got it. I like that. No, like blow up.

You do it in there, whatever that's happened. Oh, so you don't have to get charged. They have 250 on the room for you. Yeah, this is like the, they're like, this is the liquid hell or what? Yeah, you have to sign, you have to sign a thing at the front desk. No smoking and no shit on the carpet.

I just... Do you think they're just like... Oh, God. Here's the thing, because there's some employees there that are just gonna be over. This is the worst weekend of my life. I can't believe they took this convention. Do you know excited some employees that have done it before

are like, oh, Gary, this is his first weekend. Yeah, that's what I mean. There's gonna be an 18-year-old kid who just dropped out of high school right before he was going to graduate and just worked at the hotel. Now there's like, well, this is still better than English class. Like kind of an inner, you just hear the fire alarms being torn. What's wrong? There's a guy in room two 11. What? Hey, was he, he was, I think he was holding a man like a popsicle. Well, he was, he was trying, just trying to get more leverage so he pulled down and now we all have to walk out in our room

I think band-aids band-aids maybe like um oh Yeah, like a first aid kit you need some you need lube. I think you need this some lube. Yeah, that's I mean that's like give I guess I'm thinking about what are they gonna bring that's not obvious like cuz if you're going to fist fest There's gonna be a lot of right section. So like What if there's a diet or something like a real like if you know you've eaten a bunch of a If you eat a bunch of root vegetables, it makes a lot easier for it to go in Yeah, there's gotta be a certain buffet that they have yeah, yeah, like I'm like wondering like fisters and

fisties Right, I mean one one has spicy food and the other one, they just serve Indian all weekend. Oh, we call this the ringsteen. It's just a bunch of guys with red hands from burning, just flaming hot cheeto dust butts. I think they probably have to bring pillows. I bet this is an ass fucking pillow that somebody made. Oh yeah. I mean, there's a snoring pillow. Why wouldn't you make an ass? There's gotta be a like a medical bend over. Like, I bet there's some medical like pillows and stuff that people buy like a belly pillow. Yeah. You know, they got pillow for the pregnant woman. Yeah. But

like it's got like it's like a triangle and it's got a flat base and then the, lean over and ramp this fucking guy. Yes. It just present your butt in the perfect way. Just an upside down stirrups. Do you? I mean, all right, well let's see if we're right. Ready? Here we go.

What do we got? What are the events are like? You need a power, you need a power strip because many of the outlets in parts of the resort are not near the bed Oh, this guy's being reasonable This guy's planning a regular trip Slash ass fucking trip. So we're gonna get I stopped by the pharmacy and pick up my child's medicine We're gonna get we're gonna get a couple right iPhone or a plug or i Android plug make sure you bring you plug

I bet a toothpaste gonna be all right. What else do we got? lube second one but but but it gives you a tip He says if you're flying check all your baggage so you don't have to deal with TSA I'll remember that's a good fisting etiquette etiquette for bottoms to bring their preferred loop So it's on the bot if you're the bottom you have to bring to bring the loop. We ain't bringing loops. No, no, no. With tops or rough riders with fisters. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah, we are. I'm sorry. I'll bring the loop. Yeah. I don't know. I'm sorry.

Did you want to say it as a point of masculinity of like, no, we don't need it. We do need it. You just pushed through me like press board. I just use your own, your own ass juice. It's like, uh, I just use your own your own astues. It's like, uh, I just make you know what someone's moving in? They'll sit on a box and then there's just some given and it's not like filled with boxes. They just fall in. I make you pre come until it drips into your butt. That was too far. That was poetic. It was, it was, it was all right.

I could see why you've had a long, long history. Call me subscribe. I'm very discreet. That's my thing. You're good with language. Yeah. Yeah. Here we go. I'm running down my rib little taint. You need a few puppy pads. Whoa, get started. Hit the store on the way to fist fest. This will allow for more room in your luggage. So they say don't bring it. They're saying get it once you get to Georgia. Okay, I'm gonna. I'm gonna say a puppy pad is a wee wee pad, correct? Yes. So you're tub. So instead of a tub,

instead of your tub, they're going to put down puppy pads on the bed because there's going, here's a problem with fist fest. That's why I said, uh, kiddie pool, kiddie pool, which I think is grosser because even no water or water. Yeah, whatever. Just splash around. If there's water, you're going to make tea. And I don't want to make tea. Oh, it becomes a lot stewier.

I don't want to sit. Like a dinty, more beef stew. You know, it's like, it's like, oh. It's like, you see a little piece of lettuce floating around? You know, like, you know, gumbo is delicious, but you never want to see how it's made. Yeah, dude. I don't want to be on all fours in a kiddie pool and just seeing my wife's

chicken soup rolling around my knees. Just like throwing a little bit of sassafras, couple of ham hofs. Get in there. Let it sit in that Georgia hotel room, turn off the AC. It'll be ready by midnight. That's the gumbo I had on Monday. Look at that. So let me ask you a question.

Here we go. I think that the puppy pads are a good idea. Because you can just roll those up. So this would bother me about this. When I thought about Fist Fest, I thought it would be professionally done where there'd be no shit. You know what I mean? I think that's unavoidable.

I don't think so. I think you can avoid shit. I think that I talked to a gay roommate once and I was like, aren't you worried about shit on your dick? He's like, ugh. I'm like, what? He's like, yeah, you clean yourself out. Yeah, they give it a flushing.

A flushing. Yeah, like they go, they call it roto-ruder. Yeah. I don't know. Have you ever had anal sex? On a girl or on me? Whatever, man. It's not whatever.

It's a huge difference. It's 2024, Bobby. I'm not. I have a 10-year-old son. It's a huge different five years from now when he listens to this. That's a very good point. It's a big difference, my friend Shane.

Who was the first guy who fucked you? It was name, Michael. No, I've never had anal sex. I've look I've had girls play with it. That's kind of my thing. I'm kind of known for butt play. Yeah But I can't have anything really in it. But and you have you Two women. I've had two women. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, I don't mind it. I don't really like it. It's not like a I Doesn't load you up the way it does. Oh guys, it's just because it's no, I think of vagina. There's something about, I don't know. It doesn't have a giant is lubed. Yeah. No,

an asshole is too, it's too dead. You know what I mean? It's like, I like real hair. It just looks like what it looks like, like death valley to you. Like the Southwest in August. He just, a wig. It's just the wind hits it. It's not the same as regular hair. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, I get it.

Yeah. I'm not really. Yeah. I mean, it's fine. I don't, I don't, If it's offered, will you just be like, yes, we're doing that? I'll come right there. Fuck my ass. Yeah.

I'm done. Yeah. I think it's one of the sexiest things ever said during sex. Yeah. I don't know if there's a sexier taboo thing That a girl should say and she's she's like She they always get mad. I don't know why girls always get mad They're gonna build themselves a girl that a girl's never went It's always like you fucking dirty fucking fat pig. What you fuck my heart relax

They need to insult you before I think they need to build it up to us you so they gotta like they gotta go in like They're playing like a game of pickup basketball like they're like I'm gonna kick this perfect Yeah, they're gonna turn into the Hulk. Yeah, I've I've honestly I probably would to fuck my ass I probably would too. I probably would have to juice myself up a bit for it too. Can't be nonchalant. Want to fuck my ass? What? I would be, I would be scared of a girl. I had it offered that way. I've never had anal sex, but like this one one was just like, do you like anal sex? And I was like, Oh, I've never done it. And, and, uh, she goes, uh, and I was out to you and she goes, yeah.

Right. Well, there's a little oomph in that, but it's a little disturbing. But it's a little like, it was a little. Yeah, she likes it more than I'm like, yeah. She still tried to meet a, you know, she still tried to meet a wife. Like not yet. Yeah.

Because if she's, if you, you know, if your girl that likes, I'm fucking you wanna. It's like, all right, you're building yourself up. But of course, you know, like Napoleon dynamite, would you like to put it in my ass? What? Yeah. If they respond with the same energy of like, I don't care where we have dinner. Like the same kind of, yeah. Do you want mayonnaise? I don't care. Yeah. What? I'm going to put something in your bomb. It's fine. Yeah. It's

a little, it's a little put off. Yeah. you want a little a little dirtiness to it, right? Yeah, we go back. I didn't tell you to go anywhere. No like every Yeah, yeah, look at these guys because I think go back. They might keep it on your credit card I think they might be buying this I'm we're gonna go from I think we're going right Danny Do you think they would hire us to perform there? Yeah Yeah, but I have to the way you bring me on stage. You have to stick your fist in my ass. That's the way you're next. Oh, that'd be a great act. That'd be the best act for ass fast. Something George and auto never got to.

Oh, that was so funny. If, if, if you got a little max and put it on Danny's lap and he just stuck his fist and they did like an improv. He paints his face and he's like, this is a x-rated peanut and it's just Jeff Dunham's top. It's an x-rated peanut. X-rated. That's great. All right, what else do we got, Danny?

It says, you only need a select few toys. More likely than not, you'll be playing outside of your room most of the time. And what do you mean? Where, where did they have a special room? No, I think like in the pool area and not, uh, and you're not going to be carrying your toys with you. I packed way too many boys in your asshole. You fucking sissy.

What the fuck? I packed way too much. Sorry, you didn't like that one? You're all comic. I apologize. Yeah, I get it. It's dumb. It's stupid. It's a grow. You old comic. He really didn't get all fucking offended.

I'm sorry. You need sunscreen? Scrawlin? Sunscreen. Sunscrown. Sunscrown? Sunscreen, sunglasses, and aloe. some ground, some ground, sunscreen, sunglasses and aloe by aloe to heal your asshole. This pale, Midwestern pop. Didn't he say he was from Connecticut?

He's saying is saying it about somebody else. Oh, why do you remember where he lives? We're going. You guys are going. You're coming. I'm busy this week. No, I got a good gig. I'm doing Acme. I got a good gig. I'm doing acne. I got it Yeah, acne's a good gig. Yeah, I can you there this weekend two weeks. Yeah, wow great job. Yeah Hey, I want to get into that. I guess there's a couple things I want to talk about

Let's go we're gonna get through it. I like that. I like that you the way you break the ice though There's gonna be no barrier slater. What I have no barriers. You're gonna be like, oh, there's no barriers left. Yeah I was right. Let's talk about it. Yeah. It was fun My uncle good A few cute outfits well, of course you gotta bring you why do you need an outfit if somebody's sticking your fist in your ass? Um, well, you know like every present needs to be unwrapped. Yeah, you know what you're right Yeah, if it isn't really that fun if I'm just like a body gotta do this watch. And I just hand it to you bare handed. We have some good news for you Bobby. Like you put it even in a box.

Yeah, right. What's that? We have some good news for you. For our brothers in recovery attending Fist Fest. Oh yeah. And keeping with our goal to provide a safer sex drug, drug three environment. Thank you.

And trying to socialize. We are adding a 12 step meeting this to the weekend. That's awesome. Now me and Voss, I'm gonna take Voss. Oh, sorry, I shouldn't bring this in. Whoops. Great. Are you sober too?

Yeah, are you sober? Oh, he's like, fuck for you. No, I'm sober right now, I haven't drank in 16 days. Oh, good feel. Yeah. Is that a thing? I am doing it, I'm gonna drink again. Like I know I'm, like I'm just, I'm drying out.

Like I'm hope, I'm just, I'm drying out. Like I'm, I was just in the bottle for a bit too much like in January. So I was like, I need a moment. So have you ever tried to get sober before? No. No. So this is a thing. Well, I've taken, I take patches. Like I'll do like, you know, like six weeks at a time or whatever, a couple of weeks, whatever, you know, like, you know, like six weeks at a time or whatever, a couple weeks, whatever. You know, like, you know, with the job we have, oftentimes I'll have a casual drink and not get loaded.

But I had to like do the whole, I'm not drinking at all for a bit because I was drinking like, I was just getting into my cups a lot. Oh really? Yeah. What happened? Anything happened?

No, no. Any, any follow-up? Any, just, you made the choice? I know. Yeah, yeah. I was just like over-nitted a bunch, you know? Like I was having a lot of fun weekend. But nobody was like, dude, you gotta stop. No, no, no, no. Any, any fallout? Any, just you made the choice? I know. Yeah. Yeah. I was just like over-nitted a bunch, you know, like I was having a lot of fun weekend. But nobody was like, dude, you got to stop. No, no, no. I'm not close enough to anyone to, for them to stop.

Really dude? No, I wouldn't. No one. I don't think anyone I know would be like you drink too much. Where are you? Where are you out of right now? LA? No, I live here. You live in New York. Yeah, but I'm on the road a lot. I do the road every week. I never really see you. I mean, I do the road on the weekends a ton. Like it's, I live here. You live in New York. Yeah, but I'm on the road a lot. You're on the road. I never really see you. I do the road on the weekends a ton. Like, it's yeah, it's finally going in the right direction, which is nice. I'm starting to

loathe being gone. And you have no family here. No, where's your family? I got two brothers in Texas in what part of Texas? Fort Worth. Is that where you're from? Yeah, from there. Yeah. And you're Mexican, half Mexican, right? Mexican, half Irish, half Irish. Yeah, good there. Yeah. And you're a Mexican, half Mexican, right? Half Mexican, half Irish. Half Irish. Yeah. Good combination. Yeah. Very.

You from your cowboy guys or rednecky or what are you over there? Well, my mom was from southern Ireland. So like an actual, I met like Irish immigrant. And then my dad was second generation Mexican American, maybe third. So like we're pretty Mexican, pretty like we're not. I am a little. I wouldn't say I'm redneck. I wouldn't say we're rednecky, but we're pretty Mexican, pretty like we're not, I am a little,

I wouldn't say I'm redneck. I wouldn't say we're redneck, but we're definitely, I have a little bit of a Texas draw here and there. Yeah, sure. Yeah. And my brother's maybe a bit less, but. And your mother has a Brogue accent? Yeah, she did. Yeah.

Is she gone? Yeah, yeah. Oh, sorry. Is your father still alive? No, no. Oh, they're gone. Yeah. Oh, so when you say you got nobody, it's just your brothers. Yeah, and then I have my brother's Kids they're not your uncle. Yeah, my nephew

But there's like one I talked to the most and the other ones are like grown, you know, oh, so you don't talk to them that much Well, I mean like they're like like well text But you know like I kind of when they were becoming kids. I was already out of Texas like I grow up They didn't grow up around me. So the relationship is like, oh, that's my uncle and we like each other, but that's kind of, you know, I wouldn't say we're super closer. Right, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

So I am, and that's fun. I mean, I got a huge Irish Catholic family. Yeah, well, you're from Boston, right? Yeah, my grandfather and grandmother had eight kids. And you know, all my aunts and uncles have two aunts, five uncles, and everybody has eight kids. My grandmother and grandfather passed away. But they passed away like a hundred. They made it to Hawaii.

A hundred and one. My grandmother was 95. My grandfather was 101. Jesus Christ. So yeah, I got good genes in the fam. Yeah. It's rare for Irish blood. It is. But they got, yeah, it was weird. I mean, it was, I mean, my grandfather was still the, the kicking around when he was a hundred dudes, still making people laugh, still that, you know, that greatest generation man, you know, walk in,

you still doing comedy. I'm like, yeah, kind of as a living, what? Cause he went to my first comedy show and he saw me just eat my dick. You know what I mean? Sweet that he was there though. Yeah, he did come, but he hated it. Yeah, of. You know what I mean sweet that he was there though. Yeah, he did come but he hated it Yeah, of course he did. I hated it when I told my mom I was

Quitting college to become a comedian. She said I was afraid you would say that Yeah, but she's also right, you know, like yeah, it doesn't work out for most people. So yeah, yeah, it doesn't it doesn't Yeah, now it seems like it's working out for so many people it's it's working out for everybody who tries it Yeah, because there's a way yeah, like we were talking about at the beginning of the show before we went to asbest Well, yeah, let's get it. Can we get some let's just do a little levity. What about the asbestos? What do you bring it up? Well, I thought it'd be interesting if you guys guess what it cost to go to fist fest Oh, this is a great. I love this game. I'll guess right now. I guess it was 160 Well, there's also there's day passes and then there's weekend if you want to go for the whole weekend

You get a discount so guess the weekend in the day pass one. I'm gonna say one six one twenty five for the day I'm gonna say Three three seventy five for the weekend and what amount would make you go fuck that I'm not going I Mean no amount It was 30 million dollars My dignity I would sell my wife's pussy on the street to make enough money I'm guessing it's gonna be like 550. I'm gonna. I'm guessing it's gonna be like 550. I'm gonna I'm guessing it's gonna be exceedingly expensive for as this yeah cuz sometimes this sex shit is like weird you know like like

it's like we doesn't seem like it should cost any money but then they're like I'm pretty sure well Bobby you lose the website you're really close first of all we're all going And everybody that listen to this podcast is going This best brass prizes do not include event bright piece It is a Really cheap Maybe for a for a memory you are never gonna forget

And a smell you're never gonna forget. When your child's face is rattling around in your brain on your death bed and it looks sort of familiar. When the cowboy hat. This mess will still be clear as can be. When the cowboy hat falls off your head and you scream in pain. Oh.

Oh. 119, We can pass. But I was on site. But on site, we can pass. But on site, right? Someone says they bought the the early bird pass for fist fest. Do you think they're they're like a little like that's like a clue of like, all right, this guy's a little too eager to even for us.

I like the guy for our even for our community. I like the guy that was like, fuck it, I I'm gonna go. I'll just pay the extra 10 I'm gonna go fuck it. Let's go. Come on Frank. Let's do it also Yeah, I think it's just to pay for the price of the hotel room, buddy. I want to go to ask for their volunteers Oh, it's volunteering dude. I will afford it What if you can't afford if you can't afford you can volunteer to be an ass that's nice it is nice it is nice like what it's pretty inclusive shifts are designed to take no more than 30 minutes

because it hurts but no we bought a new hose so you can shut up for more than one shift of course you can or you can Require you to make strength pools are restocking supplies and cleaning the pool of shit Refilling beverage cool. Wow. All right. Well We should all go and volunteer for nothing we should just volunteer just to just to walk by Whatever room that's getting at what is the banner look like to you? Oh, it's gotta be. What is the logo? They get a T-shirt. What is the logo?

It's just a guy with wings and a huge fist. It's a pig with wings. Is it a pig? Yeah. Yeah, he's a dirty bottom pig. He's a sloppy bottom pig with a- He's got some fucking pipes on him though. Look at his arm.

Of course it does. Who wants a little tiny arm in his asshole? I mean, I have to pick one. Wow. That, my asshole just clenched up and went, no. I heard my asshole go, no. You know, I gotta say, this is better than the green thing from JFL. At least I know what that is. That's like a great, I don't know a lot, but I know what that is.

That's a horny angel pig. That green thing and the green French thing. That's a horny angel pig. That green thing and... That is... The green French thing. Yeah, that... Wait, but go down for a little bit.

Go down and ask Pig. I love Ask Pig. They have more sponsors than we do. Of course they do. That's... Dude, yeah, they're selling sex. Yeah, dude, it's fist-fest, bro. Of course they do.

They're selling fist... Super. Stud-fist. What's a stud fist? Who are they? What do they make? Let's guess. I say candy bars. I say European candy bars. It's got Nugget. There's a lot of Nugget in the baby pool. What is this?

Oh, no. What is it? Go back. We can't even after ten minutes. We can't look at that That's a sight where they I think they you I thought you were gonna have some balls and just go in there No, I'm not gonna have balls. I have an ass. You don't need balls. That's ball fest. We're not going there What's this one? It's gonna be the same thing There's no way this is not gonna be a super sniffer. It makes it so you can like take poppers more easily. What? What's a popper? It loosens up your asshole, Bolly.

Wait a minute. Yeah, yeah, it's like, I, my friend, Melissa Stikowski, had a joke about it. She goes, if you don't know what poppers are, just imagine if a drag queen, rain VCR cleaner underneath your nose. That's a good joke. Yeah, she was great, man.

Don't let a spill ruin your... What's the spill? Is that poop? Is that poop? No, I think it's the poppers. The super sniffer prevents spills and... No, it's a catcher. What is it for?

Go, never burn so you don't smell their assholes. What is this? No, it's a device that you hook up to your bottle of poppers so you don't lose any of it What's a popper? It looks like a liquid that it's nitrous for what? Getting high and it loosens your asshole Okay, wait a minute. There's a drug that gets you high and makes your asshole presentable, huh? I don't even sober 37 years. Okay. That's good. Yeah that get you high and make your asshole presentable, huh? How long have you been sober? 37 years.

Okay, that's a good amount. Yeah, should I know about this? Yeah, I mean, I was like, that's why I was kind of like, I think this has been pretty public for a bit, so. Yeah, I got sober when I was 15. Back in the 80s, when we just did regular drugs and we didn't stick. You never told anybody about your fisting fetish.

What, oh my God, look at those two. Why did I hate getting my nipples pinched dude? God damn it. I'm out. He's got the back of the neck too. It looks like it looks like me This is like a you ever watch the dark side of the ring. No. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah This is like a looks like like when they find out one of the guys is gay. Like, yeah, this is pretty much what I had the images in my head. Yeah. Just the undertaker fucking around. Just laying in the Paul bearers. Yeah. Just jacked guys. Here's the thing. This is going to be I mean mean there's got to, I mean I wonder what type of guy does, like is it a shredded, are these in shape guys, are these older guys? It's all over.

It's all over the map. I think the thing is, if you're going to fist-fest. God damn you, you should be the voice of fist-fest. Hey, if you're going to fist-fest, remember inclusion. You should be the voice of fist fest. If you're going to fist fest, remember inclusion. I don't think they're going to be like, Dude, I'd just suck the fuck. No, he's a skinny Indian nerd.

We're not going to work him like a fucking puppet. Who'd you imagine Matteo showing up at fist fest? How everybody would just come at the door. I bet they all look like him though. growing up at Fist Fest, how everybody would just come at the door. Hey. I bet they all look like them, but you know, they're all just like, fitness is like such a part of that culture. I think it's like fucking crazy. Oh, they have prize giveaways. So pay attention. That's good. What do they give away? Diapers?

Our, yeah. Is there like an event or like a, a speak like, what's a pig pen? what the fuck is a pig pen I want that is that food is that how they get food I know what the pig pen is I don't think it's a pig I don't think it's food so anything it's just a bunch of pigs in a pen sticking fists each other's asses doing nitrous oh god what is that what is that well wait that is that's a lot don't touch my foot I'll touch my foot don't touch my fuck yeah you touch I'm straight you can't I'm so

I'm married I have a kid yeah yeah let's go fuck they they're dead what have we just started making up just fucking fuck me fucked me. That is a lot. I'm not going if it's just gay sex. I'm not going if this is either hot men, hot hands, hot holes, and a lot of them. How do you like this? Public place of paces are supplied with all slings of another equipment.

And all those supplies you'll need to have a fun, fun double F fun time. Beer, bott bottled water and sports drinks will be supplied continuous You need a hydro you need electrolytes. Yeah, they're gonna be like you they're gonna be like it They're just gonna be eating protein bars and I Energy too much electrolytes you lose by having somebody's fist in your ass. Oh Man Well, there's fistfest. I mean we're going and he found it if I'm working that weekend if not whatever town this in will do a comedy show and we all

go to fistfest. Do you think fistfest and skankfest have any overlap? I think it's the same thing. I bet it's the same smell Clip it Shane About you guys who haven't washed their hoodies in two years It smells like hot dog water and pennies Shit Wow about us anything look at we I mean I could sit on this site Oh. Oh, shit. Wow. About us. Anything? Look at me. I mean, I could sit on this side. I want to know what the pig pen is though.

Yeah, can we- I have an idea. I do too. Yeah. I do too. A bunch of fucking guys with beards just fucking- What do we got? What's the pig pen?

Can't you Google it? I'll Google it. Or are they- are they- are they sponsored? Is the pig pen- that'd be funny if- It was like, like, like the way the Draft King The Super Bowl was brought to have time shows brought to you by Draft King Yeah, but pig pen is actual like a gay fist fucking thing. What if it is just pig pen from is this Charlie Brown? That's their mascot. Yeah. Oh, why not? All right, here we go. What is it?

Yeah, no filming a photography, of course. We get it. Cell phones and cameras are not allowed in the pig pen at any time. You're gonna get shit all over the place. Should we call them and ask what the pig pen is? Yes, please. Why would you ask that? Of course call them. We want to know about... I gotta give them credit. They are like

Really taking ownership of the word pig like it's never a compliment, you know, like you little fucking ass pig And they're like yeah it is. Okay guys took the rainbow and they took the mustache and now they have pig It's good cops are cops are coming back up How's this? How come this is just a guy thing? How come there's no girls? Oh, why is it seems like it's just a guy thing. Why wouldn't it be a game keeper? What? What's his name?

The game. He's funny. He's funny. I want you to follow the gamekeeper on my account I Want to know everything this guy's up to Friday night. I was in the pigpen at fist fest Oh, I got a follow-up to getting double team punched And while there isn't video thank Jesus, I will do my best to explain My butt will never be the same.

I gotta respect the rhyme. He literally, I will do my best to explain, but my butt will never be the same. It sounds like the end of a sad song. Danny, can you sing that for me please? Friday night, start it up. Can you give me a beat? Boom, boom, boom, boom. Friday night, I was in the big pen. I can't sing. You can't sing. Can you give me a beat? Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom,

boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom,

boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, that is a lot to get out. Yeah. Oh, we can do rap. You can do rap Friday night. I was in the pig pen, fist fest, getting double team punched in while this video there ain't video. I'll do my best to explain my but will never be the same bars. All right, let's go where he doesn't explain what it is. Where does he

explain explanation? I think it's I think it's like the surprise guest at Skangfest where you kind of have to get there to find out. Same smell. Same smell. I think it's just, I bet it's just one room where everyone's just in and out of each other like the fight. Just smells like a pet store. Oh, I bet there's a newspaper all over the

Bobby. That's called the resort and say we're going. That's called and ask questions to the resort. Well, there's no way the resort's going to answer any of these questions. There's no way some old Southern woman's going to go. I don't know. It's 11 at night. It's worth trying. Please. Can you find, would you mind if you don't mind opening up footage? I want to see what the actual resort looks like too. Oh, it's gorgeous. It's right there. It's it's not that nice Look how small that fucking pool is. Oh Jesus Christ. Are you oh my god? All right, here we go

Let's just see Shane All right, everybody quiet What's the date? What's the date? What's the date? Yeah, hi. I'm thinking of attending, I'm thinking of attending Fist Fest on April 25th to the 27th, and I have a couple questions. Okay.

Now, if now, is this all men? Yes. So there's no women at all, right? No. Okay, perfect. And do I have, if I'm gonna come, I'm probably gonna pre-order, but do I have to bring any special is there anything I should bring?

Like my son register where you have to register with him first week in a book around You can what you have to all you have to register on the site and then book a room Yes, I think you're cold. Okay. Now is it like I'm worried about like at the Peatley I would can we be outside or is everything inside? Like what is it safe? Hold on a second. They have different things every all over the resort. Some things are inside, some things are outside by the pool. Now how clean?

Like is it everybody hygienic? How is hygiene? I'm very clean. Well, I'm pretty sure about hygiene I mean, this is like that 10th of years. Oh, geez Wow, yeah, I'll tell you okay, and if you go through that world play everything that you need to know for that We'll be online. We just know that as hosting event that we don't know exactly what It's just us that we can like I'm not to run into a family of six at breakfast, right? No, this is the All Game and Resort.

Oh, thank God. Okay, great. Make sense now. Got it. Yeah. Oh, because I just didn't want to, what about the deposit? Well, the deposit is $250, but like I said, you have to book with $250, but like I said, you have to book with $250 before you even get a room. But all your questions for it like the proper safety

and hygienic, whatever, hygienic, all that being there, and they guidelines on their webpage. But you have to book with, I mean, you have to register with them first. I'm very new to this, and I don't know what a pig pen is, and I'm just, I don't know, what is that? Well, a pig pen is a player for BDSMM and you can come with leather wear or your boxes, but you can't be closed You can't have clothes. No sir. So when you go in the pig pen, you're you can be naked

Yes, well, no, I fully naked, but I think I think so but I never yeah is yeah. Is this pig? I know it is the less clothing option, yeah. So in the pig pen, I'm like, everybody in there is, you know, free game or is there people watching or? If most people watching and people participating. Okay, and is there a medical, like if something happens, is there safety? Yes, there something happens, is there safety? Yes, sir, all that, yeah. That's why I said all those questions would be on the FISFIS guidelines, because like I said, we just host any event, but they have a well-paged and they have questions that many people may ask that I can't answer.

Okay, great. Are you going to be there? Yes, I work here. Are you going to be at FISFIS? here. Are you going to be at Fist Fest? I'm going to be at Fist Fest, I'll be at Werd. Oh, you're not going to be at Fist Fest though. You'll be working. I'll be here, I'll let people check people again and stuff like that.

Oh, so you can't, oh, you guys can't go to Fist Fest. You have to just work Fist Fest? Well, you know, I mean, I don't participate in those things, like that particular thing. So I have watched around and watched really before I participate. How was I mean, was it crazy? Like I said, this is my first time.

Was it nuts? Were you like, what am I? It was the first time I've seen it. But after you see it for many times, you get used to it. You get used to it. And it's like, I mean, there's, is it like, like hard fist? Like, is it gentle fisting?

Is it? It's like, yeah. It's however, is it gentle fisting? Is it? Yeah, it's however that you want it. It's like seeing you and that person that you with. Like I said, they had demonstrations and videos on their website. They have questions I can't answer. Oh, okay. But yeah, they have a website

and they show you demonstration videos. They also have classes to teach you how to do it and stuff. And how to properly do it. So you were injured and one. So like I said, all those questions you need to go, it would be on business on their own. All right, do I bring my own snacks though? Like are there snacks there?

Or should I bring snacks? We have a campaign here and they will be having like brunches and dinners for the people. That's why I say you have to book with them because you wish you could pay with them. You get snacks. That's for your food for that week. So I get snacks and that includes snacks. So, all right, but do you- I don't know about snacks, but do you guys have snacks? Like if I want a snack?

We have a yes, we have a vending machine and we also have a can fail property. Okay, okay, good because you know after I did it the first time I was. Yes, I understand. Okay. Okay. All right. Thank you so much for your help. Hopefully I'll see you. What's your name? Br Bryce. Oh, nice to meet you. Okay, my name. Yeah, my name is Mike Cannon. Very nice to meet you. You too.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. I'm going.

You really. I'm going as Mike Cannon. Bye. Bye. I can't believe how fucking long you kept that going. You also, there was like, I don't, I think I'm gay. If you're listening to this and not watching,

Bobby even did like, basically you were acting. I, because I needed to because if I, I felt like if I didn't have a little sass to me, he was gonna be, cause I'm Boston. I'm either, you know what I mean? Yeah, you're like, you're, man. They're gonna be cuz I'm Boston. I'm either but yeah, yeah, you're like you're Man, they're gonna be on you pretty quick. You think if you're not yeah, hey, dude If I talk like Markie Mark, dude, how is the pig? What the fuck is the pig pen you fucking clear?

It's an all-game resort God bless this resort yeah, and God bless Augusta Where the fucking masters are? They have Fist Fest! The most classic holy shit event in the world and right down the road is Fist Fest. This is the greatest thing ever. And they have videos. Number one, first of all, listen, go back. It's nothing. Guys, we gotta go.

We gotta go. They got 4.5 stars on Google of course they do they're fucking great it's fist fest if I want a shirt I want a shirt so bad I'm getting a hoodie I want to I'm getting a hoodie yeah let's see the hoodie where's the merch yeah let's see the merch I guarantee they got great hoodies. Shop. Oh, yep. I'm getting it right there. That's my hoodie right there. Well, I don't see the hoodie.

I'm just got to be. Oh, that's a t-shirt. Okay. So hard. Where's the hoodies? I'm I'm just love with Denny's. Hi, Panics. I'm.

Um, fist fast hoodie. Oh, this comes up so easily. He panics him Fist-Fest hoodie oh This comes up so easily here it is Double pull over it's a pull over honey. It's exactly what it. Oh, yeah. What is that the only one? No, dude, I want a fish like you work at games. Yeah, dude. I want fist-fest. I want a logo I won't eat that one like the the food fighters logo. I want fist fest. I want a logo. I want the, I want like the, the Foo Fighters logo. I want some inlay. I want like a little stitching on the wrist, maybe.

I want, I want, yeah. I want an embroidered, awesome fist fest hoodie. What if it's, the hoodie has like a plastic lining on the inside. So when you're fisting, like, you know. What if the hoodie went down and hooked on like a, like a little onesie? Oh God., God.

Oh, God. What do you got? Do you got it or not? No, that's flowers. You double punched asshole. Stop looking. Look up fist-fest hoodie. How'd you end up searching this?

Because he's a fist-fest fester. All right. There we go. Go back up. Go back up. Loser. Is that fist-fest stuff? No. No, go to the site. It was at the site. I remember I saw something up top there at the site I go over now look see where it says

Look it explore Explore designs over. Oh God always shop products top middle top middle top you fucking asshole It's panicking. Oh There we go, okay that that one I want to cancel that no Bobby's phone number. No, I mean Look at how badass that ff is where's that? Oh, not that one. I love the fist one That's a few fighters look go over there. I want the food fighters, but that's fist fest Well, look at those lightning bolts of shame. What else do you got? You got a hood. They have to have that. No hoodie. Please tell me that's a hoodie. Go down. Oh, we got.

Dude, they got a, there it is. There it is. Over to the right, Danny. They got a nice sensible sweater. I want the pink one. I want that one in black. Did they have it in black? They got it. Oh What do they got? What's on the back just a fist? What if it was just a prolapsed asshole in the world? Ah All right double XL you got to get double XL because those are for gay guys So the XL is really a large the largest of medium the mediums are small and the smallest for people with fucking Who are little tiny boys? Alright, there you go black

Love it go to the front Let me see what the front looks like This is not bad Where's the logo? Yeah black logo Okay, well go watch maybe you get the logo in red. Yeah, red. Do they have the logo in red? See right there. See if it's an option there. Yeah, we can't do it there. All right. Nice talking to you. All right. Anyways, let's go back to this while he's looking up our fist fest hoodies. Our fist. I love the logo. Our hoodies. Oh oh you're not in you're not going what weekend is it and I know

Dude you got your special out blue-eyed Mexican yes, sir, which is you got blue eyes. Yeah, I'm working on yeah, it's pretty wild Yeah, this year. They have just to be clear this year. They have three fist fest So if you can't make the first one the first one is April 25th through 27th well the one in October is my birthday week It's my birthday week to October 8th. Oh really? Let's go to Fist Fest. Dude, that's how we do this. We had the worst high five. No, we do this. We do this and then we go. No, no, hold this way. Hold it that way and then I go in and then you let me in and then a bunch of confetti comes out. And then I go in and then you let me in and then a bunch of confetti comes out

That would be a great birthday. What's go back scroll down. What is that guy doing? Oh Boy, I know it's so weird It looks like one of those paintings in Europe. I wouldn't understand that we're like Talking about the Greek Greek gods. Just man. They got all the contacts up there. Of course they do dude fist fest looks fun I Mean it looks fun. Look at that pool that pool. It's pretty at the end of the weekend. It's just brown It's pretty great. Yeah that they have all found each other I mean that of a safe place to I think it's they seem to be doing a lot of I mean that of a safe place to, I think it's, they seem to be doing a lot of like,

I just want to go and watch. I want, is there, is there- I think the gays are ahead of safety in a lot of way. Like if there was a, there was- You remember the 80s? When most of them died? No one saw that coming. Don't know.

You remember Philadelphia, Tom Hanks? I don't know. I don't know about safety. Oh, now. Now they seem to be, you know, yeah, yeah. We'll go with do me. You think they're, you think they're teaching anybody anything at a skank fest now that they got prepped. They're like, fucking stick it all in my ass. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I was praying. What's that? What's wrong with your hands? Oh, I was doing my

lawn this morning. A weed wacker got my knuckle. Yeah, put that right in my ass Looped that up How do we do we have to come across this? I don't know God God God brought this to our I want to know that because this came out of nowhere for me Yeah, well we waited 10 10 minutes. That's true. So it wasn't nowhere. It wasn't a nice conversation for 10 minutes Yeah, perfectly industry. Yeah that nobody nobody cared about. And then we went into as fast. And now the views are through the roof. Yeah. You know, many people are going to go to I'm tell I bet you Tom Sigour is talking about this with Bert next thing. You're about as fast. I bet Bert's going to go take a

shirt off and sell fucking liquor. I bet they said if I was those two with sponsoring I would bring floor covering starts in place sheets to cover the pants of carpet I would sponsor this fucking thing in a second we should see how much do they need to sponsor how much money do we need to get to get on that spot I want to reach out I want to sponsor fistfest I'll give them 1500 bucks if I get a thing on the wide-angle. But I also want to sponsor Blue-eyed Mexican, the special. Oh, God. All right.

Well, listen, we got, where can I go see your dates? Here's his dates right here. The plus in Eau Claire this coming, La Brea this weekend, Friday and Saturday. I don't know when this comes out. Eau Claire, the 5th of March, through ninth. I will be at ACME. ACME. Tell him I said hi. Would you? Yeah, Lewis. Yeah. He's just such a great guy. Yeah, he's awesome. He's the best. We're a sweet guy. And then ball.

Poor comedy dude. Me and Danny went there for you. Did it. God damn. I love it. Yeah. It's the greatest. Sean Paton said it was a great room. Yeah. It's such a great club. Yeah. I love them. What else we got? Punchline, love Punchline. My club and Philly baby. Yeah, laughing tip.

I'm there for fucking, I'm on the road all. Good man. All the rest of my goddamn life. I have one weekend off today. Are you at Punchlines? I love Punchlines. I usually go to Cobbs. Oh yeah?

They put me in Cobbs, but I love the Punchline. Yeah. Molly. Yeah, she's really awesome. She's fucking awesome. Yeah, they, San Francisco is a but I love the punchline. Molly, she's fucking awesome. Yeah, San Francisco is a city I still love going to. I fucking am terrified to go back. One of my favorite cities, you asked me five years ago, what's your favorite, I would say my favorite place

to go in the world was Aruba and San Francisco. And now I'm terrified to go back. New Orleans for me. I heard it was fucking deadly. I mean just sucked I mean, it's like yeah, but like I don't fucking give a fuck. I like I like I mean, I just I That stuff like never really bothers me Like I mean, there's a lot of homeless people for sure like that shit's going on down there But like hate it. Yeah, I don't love I don't love it and I feel bad for them honestly

I hate it. I hate that they have closed doors doors I hate that they let people steal with no consequence you're not doing them a favor you want to give them something go give them something take money on go give them something I'll go help them do you don't fucking just let people shit and don't let people don't let people fucking give up you know what I mean I hate it hard man it's not this dude. It's the one of the richest places in the world. Yes. And it's like my friend lives there. He makes 220,000 dollars a year. He has a, you know, and he has like he like, he makes a crazy amount of money. It's not crazy, but he does like a Pelosi's got 140 million in the bank. How'd

that happen? Yeah. Stop it. It's good. It's it's it's it's such horseshit It's crazy that you mean to make ninety thousand a year to live above the poverty line buddy I took my I took my wife there and we had such a beautiful time fucking it's a really years ago It's a really I wouldn't take anybody there now If I if I went back there just go by myself and I'd stay over by that area where the club is. I, dude, I remember I used to walk around San Francisco. I got the iPhone 2. I was up at five in the morning waiting in line

to be the first, I just wanted to experience waiting in line for an iPhone. I remember I went to Twitter when Twitter was, nobody knew what Twitter was. I remember the guy was a when Twitter was, nobody knew what Twitter was. I remember the guy was a fan and I was always into, I was into Twitter. Nobody knew what it was, little fucking bird. The guy was a fan from OPNA.

He's like, dude, if you want to stop, I went by the offices. I was sitting down at the table, two guys walked over and said something to the dude I was with and I was like, who's that? He goes, oh, those are the founders. I'm like, I mean, I met the founders. I didn't know what's his name Yeah, dude when they had short hair on there were just fucking nerds before he became cool Yoda, dude

You know, it is weird how like can and ice people become yeah, well, I mean dude if I become a millionaire Yeah, I'm gonna grow my hair. I'm gonna just get a baby curl right here. I just have it hanged out. I'm gonna get more bracelets Can't it made fun of me because that bracelets. It was very funny. He put a thing up I'm a bracelet guy like fucking who who was it? Yeah, it was cannon. Yeah, my cannon. I see what I put up for him. No, I didn't see that you didn't see it I Put up he smashed me about my breasts. And then I put I I retweeted his thing. Did you see it, Danny? I saw his I didn't see the one you did. I see I put um, oh wait, what did you do? Okay, yes, you yeah, you're

a fucking asshole. Danny just retweeted because Danny hates me. So he trashed me about my breasts. I wrote this story was from Mike Cannon, presented by Chris, Chris D comedy. Because Chris D, Chris D presented his special. Oh, oh, yeah, way you gotta do. Yeah, I know what you're gonna do. Fuck off. All right, check it out, guys. Hey, man, thanks for coming on. Hey, buddy, I had a blast. Here's the thing, make the time. Yeah man, I can't wait to see you again. I'm glad we fucking hooked up on the bonfire and now and I'll see you in the city and I can't wait to see you at Fist Fest. Fist Fest.

Birthday weekend. Birthday weekend. Get in there, blow it up. Yay! Fist Fest. Dude, we gotta go. I'm not going. We gotta try.

I'm not spending my birthday. Let's just book something. Having that done to me for the, let's book something there at fit fest. Dude, let's do a comedy show. Get our handles blown out. Dude, we'll do a comedy show. I fit $10 a ticket and we get to watch the pig pen. We get free, we get free pig pen tickets. The fact they call the pen. Oh, I can't wait to go. We gotta get hoodies. We gotta get all kinds of stuff. Make sure you check out his special right now.

It's on his site and it's on Bert's site. It's on the YouTube page. It's called Blue Eye Mexican. It's hilarious. He's fucking hilarious. And make sure you check out his podcast, No Accounting for Taste, and check out your website.

What's your website again? Shania'sComedian.comcom and make sure you check out all my stuff. Of course I'm gonna be in a comics roadhouse coming up. Danny's gonna be there. I believe sidesputters Joe Russell's gonna be there with KP. The Paramount Theatre right now by tickets 21st of March. I am gonna be there with Big J. O'Gerson, The Bonfire Show, Poughkeepsie. I'm gonna to be in Houston. I'm going to be at the comedy mothership club 337. Laugh Boston, McCurdy's red clay comedy festival. I'm going to be there with bone to pick podcast with me and Paul Verzi kicking it first live bone to pick out there. Go to comic wearables.com. You want to get some merch from Waikido. We got the new Waikido hat up top it's actually a plastic cool

uh... patch which is awesome the regs is up there we got all kinds of hoodies we got the fuck you check spot uh... make sure you go there use co-word ladybugs get ten percent of what guys would get max marcus comedy all social media uh... and i'll be uh... at denny brahf on instagram and i'll be opening for Paul Verzi at the dojo comedy, New Jersey on March 23rd. You're going to be opening with me first, stupid. Yeah, you already plugged that

though. Yeah, but plug it again. I don't also be opening all the furze's dates. I'll also be opening for Bobby in a comics, but we can sign in Boston. I now plug Paul. And you can check out the cheese show on YouTube by just typing in the cheese show. I by just typing in the cheese show I put Joe just was at my house for the weekend and he chilled and he my dog just shit on the bed the first night there Diarrhea shit. Oh, I called me on vacation. He's like the dog just diary and well clean it up. You fucking loser I'm not your mother We're gonna do the dog

Anything is his fist fest Fast. You crawl for it. You pig. You guys are the best fans in the world. Thanks for checking out. Hope you like the show. Do me a favor. Subscribe. If you're watching this on YouTube, just subscribe. And if you really want to support the show, patreon.com, slash Robert Kelly, you get the show first, you get it live and you get to get an extra show, the YKWD extra, extra with me and Mush once a week. You can go support the show there for like, I think it's like five bucks or something like that. If not, just subscribe, like and comment into the YouTube

page and support these guys right here, these young bucks. They're fucking hilarious. And come see me live, we'll see you next time. You know what dude? You've been listening to the YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. Shitty jobs.