Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Systematic
Episode Date: July 18, 2016This week on YKWD: we have Sal Vulcano, Stavros Halkias, Leonord Ouzts, and Tim Dillon! When things get heated talking about #BlackLivesMatter, we reconcile with chocolates. Many different views were ...expressed, including the always funny "Walking-On-Eggshells-Because-I-Am-Famous" school of thought. Plus, A hilarious role play between Bobby and Leonord about what NOT to do when you're pulled over! Watch / Listen and enjoy! RiotCast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Ya son casi las dos, nos vamos a ir a casa o hemos venido a jugar.
A casa, a casa, nadie va a irse a casa.
Hay que ponerse modo de racón.
¿Eres un dragón?
Soy el dragón de Fireball.
Ya te digo yo que las mejores historias siempre piezan con un chupito de Fireball.
Bien, frío.
Yo, pues al lío.
Un Fireball, sabes que la fiesta será épica.
Ignite the night, con fireball!
Disfruta de un consumo responsable, 33 grados.
¡You're listening to Robert Kelly's, you know what dude!
On the Riotcast Network, riotcast.com
¡Hey, what's up, you know what dude, fans!
¡It's all uncle Joe!
¡The truth! Tiny mouth! know what dude fans it's a long ago the truth tiny mouth that's right folks I
have been officially diagnosed with a small mouth the oral surgeon told me I
have a small mouth I have to have teeth removed because my mouth is too small and
I'm gay also I got a new album coming out it's called are you mad at me it
comes out it's already out I thought it was coming out but Robert wouldn't let me put this advertisement on the
podcast till later I had to blow him just kidding that's not true that's
ridiculous all right anyways I have an album coming out it's called it's out it's
out already fuck me god damn it I should probably do another take of this but
maybe people will think it's funny.
I'm gonna kill myself. Anyways, I have an album that is out. It's called Are You Man At Me? It's available on all platforms. Sam Goodie,
F-Y-E, record town,
Bob's records, Just kidding, of course, that's ridiculous. It's available on, I don't know, iTunes. iTunes is all I know, that's all I have.
But it's also on Amazon, Google Play, Netflix,
whatever the hell you get, albums.
Spotify, maybe, is that a thing?
It's out, it's called Are You Man At Me?
And I love you, and I love the podcast,
and listen to the podcast, and buy my album.
It's 10 bucks, I'm proud of it. I recorded it in Buffalo.
I think it's funny.
I like it.
I like you.
That's all.
Thanks, Bobby.
Thanks everyone.
I love you, bye.
Fuck, how do you turn this thing on?
Oh, shit.
Oh, here it is.
All right.
Welcome to the funniest podcast on the planet Earth.
This is gonna be a costifier.
The podcast has no rules. Look on the planet Earth. This is gonna be a cost-defying podcast.
It's no rules.
Look at the mic asshole.
I'm sure I've already said, should I regret it?
Can I get a mic?
No!
That was trying to keep it like a comic head.
I have a bunch of eyes on.
It's just us sitting down,
and sometimes it's hilarious, sometimes it's 10 no topics,
no directions.
I love doing it.
Play both sides of the coin. That's not what a host does. You're not a part of it. Top 10 no top picks no directions. I love doing it
The day my podcast is popular I might affect somebody's life. You never know
Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck is really, I would have hacked, you know, really bugs me is how hot-warn is.
And she fucking bugs me and I go, and she goes, mm-hmm, and she, I'm like, okay.
She really settles me right the fuck down with your jersey fucking sludginess.
Really fucking calms me right the fuck fuck down you got them blown out here
Gotcha
All right, we're back. I'm back
How many how we had Dante Nero was actually took over my show last week and did the beige Philip show here
Did not do the YK did his show under the banner of YKWD because he wanted to
uh that's what he wanted to do he called me up
Bobby I wanted I was thinking if you could help me
get some help you know we can't and I was like why don't you just do my show and do
your show he's like that'd be gravy and I was like
look at I'm going to fucking a rubah do it my team will run it
because my team's the best Lauren D Poo and Scopo. Thank you.
Lauren D. I love that Scopo actually took that comment like I meant
I go to head of my best.
Like yeah, my show Mike get picked up.
Thank you very much Bobby that means.
Means a lot.
I could have quoted on his book jacket.
I had a rough two days needed. But anyways, we're back. So, you know, there was people who love the show, right?
How do the video do?
In the microphone. It's Tuesday. It's Tuesday morning. We have like 1500 views, which is like our average.
Really? Yeah, yeah. All right. Good. That's great. So people are digging it.
Yeah, people love it a lot of good That's great. So people are digging it?
Yeah, people love it a lot of good work.
Well, you always know every week we always get immediately, immediately, immediately, two
thumbs down.
And it's the same fucking.
It's always, it's always, this show sucks.
Everyone's talking over everybody.
Yeah.
Right, it's, it's, but every week there's two thumbs down.
Immediately.
The same fucking constant.
It's fine.
Yeah, listen.
I don't think so. I think they just give them the two thumbs down
They literally it's part of their day on Monday
They go I'm gonna work they go hey, yeah, here's your coffee thing all right
You don't it's right in there Krell. I know you love it. Hey boss got that paper thumbs down. Let's get to work
Fucking throw a morning BM in there too probably I don't know the BM Bound movement. Oh, oh, I'm no good at those. Yeah, I never I never set cold that in my life
I think people cold that in the office I panic when people do that because they have a three-year-old and my wife does it
I do spelling bees all the time or it's like see oh
Just rolls her eyes and then I scream cookie. She's like you're not supposed to say it
But yeah, so all right, so let's go through this. Let's get into this show. It's a big show tonight just rolls her eyes and then I scream cookie she's like you're not supposed to say it.
But yeah so all right so let's go through this let's get into this show it's a big show
tonight. We have new people that have ever been here and a while people have been here
all the time but everybody here tonight I fucking love and I'm excited that about this
show when scope will put it together so go through the list.
All right to my right. We have let's not do that. Let's start with let's start with with mini
You let's start with you know with my you know my little baby boy
Stop again here. You start here and you go this way. Okay, and you end with you all right
It's called it's called counter go this way. Yeah, that's called counterclockwise. We go cock clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop cl you lose him wait a little bit you fuck you hey Bobby I just say your barbecue skills he learned we'll take that right now he killed it last Saturday at a barbecue I don't think it was from me I don't think I taught him how to cook food
whatsoever picked it up and yeah look at those fucking calves can't see him but I
see him that you can always it's a radio show and video so yeah What's gonna fuck yourself, all right you fucking alt comic have to correct me
Well, he's always like this
Why do you say all comic and actually met something?
That almost sounded disrespectful like extra like you just have your own podcast. I don't care what you talk about you
Just talk your voice your your your swang your little funny. Yeah, but you're what you just lost my voice
I like it like this. I like it very sexy. So you like it that I can't it's velvety velvety. No, it's very
Blue Z
Yeah, we got the twang Leonard Oots right here.
Yes, yes, it's the time.
First time on the show.
First time.
Leonard Oots, you were just, I was just in a rubble.
Right, I was in a rubble before you.
With a rubble ray.
Listen in all that water.
Water, ocean.
Ocean, ampoule, and bathtub.
What you pissed in your bathtub? You know there there was a toilet wherever my dick in some water
You say it like you don't no I don't cuz they had the no
Because you're responsible and you're on a dode I know that's why you don't
Unsentitary you can all agree it's unsanitary?
So y'all think the cheeks don't be peeing in the pool?
No.
I try not to think of it.
You might not be in the pool.
I know what you got to do.
I'm on that time of the month.
So you ain't going to tell me.
It's just a snake-tow-thin.
Yeah.
But you mean bloody piss?
Blood man, it was masked.
Where was it at the rubah?
No, no, no, it's a white in the room with a sea.
You saw someone bloody piss into a pool?
No, no, no.
Was it some of the mud?
I saw that time of the month.
Oh, yeah.
So you saw someone peering in a pool?
Yeah.
Where were you happy?
Oh, god.
I don't like somebody to add a one of them cool laid back.
I was like, I was just shaking the pool though.
So I wanted to put the end of the pool.
Well, now I'm going to show you so bad.
I was a light heart.
I have to agree with you, Leonard, IP in the pool.
Yeah, I've actually got sick the last three days,
and I was sick pissing in the pool.
I was sick.
It was at a hot piss.
You know what you have three eyes and your breath is hot.
You have that hot sick piss right in the pool.
You probably got yourself sick.
You're on a whole other level. I was probably sick from Leonard's piss from the week before
Not enough glory. It's fish taco piss that is fucking oh, yeah, the fish tacos
I want to do a food show at you. We do it. Of course we cut. I'm gonna eat meat though
I gave one meat like two months ago really Really? Yeah. And the food shows over.
Dang. Why we can't try?
Oh, fucking salad show at you. What is? Let's try. Let's try to force the salad down.
Like I get tired of salads quick. I'm a fucking what? I'm said man. A salad with no meat.
You can't put bacon with some. So you don't need meat anymore. What the fuck are you
going to do? I'm not sad. I don't eat it at all, but like I've rarely like you won't catch me eating it
What the fuck?
So you need it!
So you need it!
So you need me!
God, I'm sparingly eating it!
I'm sparingly eating it!
I'm sparingly eating it!
In the past, like I don't eat pork, I stop eating pork and I stop eating red meat.
Like I might eat chicken every now and then, but I don't eat like it's mostly fish.
I don't eat meat.
What is it?
How often would you say you have red meat?
No, I have a hair in me.
I had, we went to Roost Chris in a Rubo.
So, you have red meat?
Go away.
You have a red meat.
You have a fucking cowboy prime red meat.
But at least that's a better cut though.
Oh, so if you're better and bigger, it's fine.
Oh God, you have a fucking red meat.
Every two months, they get a 60-pound steak. Every two months. Oh god, you have to fuck your like, I even need every two months, I need a 64 ounce
to take every two months.
Can I ask you a question?
Why are you talking to me like, I'm not sad?
Why?
Why are you trying to get this by me?
I'm not trying to get about nobody.
I'm still you fuck yo.
Next up we got Sal Vocano from a practical joker.
I think for having the first time on the show.
Great, I'm excited to have you on.
We met at this Skank Fest. Yes. You were killing it on stage. I'm very kind of you and
And you will like I'd love to be on so I'm glad you're on dude. Yeah, well you're from dude
Staten Island originally. Yeah, no shit. You had to take a boat
I was in town. I was in the city for work today. Really are you doing the show? Yeah, yeah, all right
We film we film here almost every day of our lives.
Really?
Yeah.
All year long?
Nine months out of the year?
You filmed nine months out of the year.
So you're a multi-millionaire?
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Yeah.
This fucking box.
No, no, no.
That's where you go to the phone, like, yeah.
Yeah.
No, no.
No, fuck you.
Let me tell you. Let me tell you.
Let me tell you.
You tell me.
I will tell you.
I'm not going to be like, no, I only
have a million over a few months.
Like, you're out.
No, no, no, no, no.
I'm not.
When I first started, they paid us like,
we were the least paid people on the show.
Really?
Yeah, we were making only a few bucks more than the lowest
paid people, because we were new and we didn't know anything.
And everyone else was like, kind of of had to have experience in their position
Yeah, and you know we we got to find out what everyone else was making and we were like wow
We're making less than everybody Wow, I actually worked my job until the second season you end of the second season
What was your job? So I
Right before like a couple of weeks before I found that I got to show I went in as a partner on a bar slice music. I had worked in the barbins like a
decade before that those are always easy to kick off right. No that is the
most. I built it and they came. Yes I was working all day on a show and then all night at the bar was at the bar like four or five nights a week
We're so at the two years. I probably had a breakdown and I and I got out of the bar
Wow, but I also was afraid to make the leap to just this
But I did it and you know, I was with every year that we've got been fortunate to stay on and other opportunities to pay a better.
Listen buddy, I went to fucking Comic Con.
I'm gonna get back to this.
Our last guest of the show.
We got Tim Dillon, the guest of the show.
My one of my favorite guests of the show.
How are you?
Thank you, thank you for having me.
I am a multi-millionaire.
I do eat meat.
I piss and pulls.
So everything's covered me.
So I'm like, I've heard nothing. He really relates to us.
I agree with everyone. Sorry. Getting a fight out of that as I was a life card
Decay to go and I would conduct a witch hunt. I would interview people would say after I was in a beach club in Long Island Would a rich Jewish people I said I don't care
We're gonna conduct an interview so we'd find that something in a pool that look like you know
Some of you swim to the bottom you like this is shit and I would go around in a little Jewish kids
You compare and I would say come here Moisha come here did you
do this did you do it and I would yell at them and they would cry and he wasn't a
good scene they were complaints but it was a public health issue
you have a catch one you have a break one down a one cry and said I did it
what you do with one little kid was just covered in sunscreen unevenly just
had gloves of sunscreen all over him and I could tell those all kinds of sunscreen in the pool
I said this is you you know you would just in this sunscreen all over the pool
There's a film over the pool and and you and he goes he just started crying and he said I didn't and I told his mother
I said I'm gonna take those tears as an admission
I tried the ban I said we're gonna ban it for a week
You can't do that
And I was like whatever. He's like those people pay a lot of money and whatever. See you know everything's a scam
He's never forgotten
Because they pay a lot of money that can shit in the pool
Shit is an accent the people you're doing on purpose your the pees and aggressive moon. You know, it's laziness
and the pee you're doing on purpose, the pee isn't aggressive move.
You know, that's as laziness.
Yeah.
Can I say something though?
Can I say something though?
First of all, about the pee and then the pool cell.
Okay.
Okay.
There's a lot of chlorine.
They've, what is that?
I was about one second.
Let me say this though.
So you're in the pool, you're fucking supposed to get up,
go through the, put your flip flops on, dry off,
go back to the ice cold hotel,
walk down that fucking ice cold hallway, get in the fucking ice cold elevator, go upstairs,
where the fuck are you at?
What out of the way, man?
What hotel are you at that is somewhere in a third world country where the air condition
is on point, but there's not a bathroom by the pool.
I mean, there's no bathroom by the pool.
There's no bathroom by the pool.
There's no bathroom by the pool. But because the bathroom is, your room is just as close go with the nobest There's no batham by the pool
But because the bathroom is your room is just as close to with a bathroom
What'd you go to be tell you this? So that means the both of you are fine fine then with everyone else pissing in the pool as well
Yes, you don't care
Yeah, you're doing it. You say you don't care what a guy
I want to say that's what you got step
That is what you see it?
You piss in the ocean yeah piss in the ocean. I probably have yeah, but I
My life I might have but I take it a shitting
I'm sorry
I take it a shit
I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shithead. I would take a shith accident. I don't care about birds. That's bad to the birds. Birds are natural enemies of human beings. It's gonna be a fucking great way.
It's gonna fucking zoom out the areas.
Birds used to be dinosaurs,
they're natural enemies of human beings.
They're constantly flying into plane engines.
They're, what do I, I don't care.
From what I gather though,
that shit might not have left for a couple days
because you ever see like a bottle or a flip flop.
It kind of comes, you come back and everything I've done.
I've done this, I've shit and not wiped good and then went in the ocean and made fish food my asshole.
And then like cleaned out my asshole in the ocean.
A bunch of fish coming around.
That's rough.
I was saying you got fucking nine parrots fish around my asshole.
So it's the other way.
You're ruining the ocean, baby.
The ocean, Sal.
Talk about a bottom feeder. Ow, Sal. Sal, Sal. You can shit in the ocean, baby. The ocean's a talk about a bottom feeder. The ocean.
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
You can't shit in the ocean.
But you piss in the ocean.
You piss in the ocean.
It's all for the emergency.
Are you kidding me?
Yeah.
I'm also a single parent.
I also don't want to be.
So you raise my own piss.
Well, you raise my own mother.
My parents got divorced, though, young,
but they both raised you.
But did you stay with your mother?
You live mostly with your mother. So they were both around. I split time. But you mostly my your mother? My parents got divorced on them, but they both raised you. You put to stay with your mother? You live mostly with your mother?
You're not supposed to stay with your mother.
They were both around, I split time.
But you mostly with your mother.
I literally split time.
But mostly with your mother.
You're a mama's boy.
Right?
You're a mama's boy.
No, I split time.
That's why you do that to like my fucking mom.
You know, piss in the ocean.
I want to sell you a bill of goods.
It's not true.
I was split time, but my mother is overbearing.
Yeah, that's what I give you that.
That's what happened. My mother wouldn't kill me if she thought I pissed in the ocean. Of course. That's why that's where it comes from
Oh, okay. I see you say you say if you're my son, you'd fucking piss in the ball right you piss in an ocean
Oh, you know, you know what I do? I step out of my garage and I piss on the I don't go out
I piss on the tree. Yeah, I'm a man. You got to piss on a man.
I piss on trees.
So you never handsex on a pool?
No.
Once.
Once.
What's the between being?
And I was, I was like young and I was drunk and I was on vacation.
So you're Jesus fine.
That's what I was.
I was on the moon.
I just didn't go in the pool.
I'm about to get.
Yeah.
No, I mean, I would never, I would second guess that at this point. I would never do that again. I'm not going over my kitchen going to pull
No, I mean I would never I would second guess that at this point. I would never do that again I don't think and let's just my own pool my own yard and no one's been in it since the last time I shocked it and the girl
Has a test on her just clean
I have a germ old but I'm playing it up a little bit right now. Are you really a German phone?
I don't like germs.
I have a phone, I don't know.
I have a phone, so me.
What I could be able to say, phone soon.
You're a phone phone, but let's introduce the couch.
Right, here we go.
What's up, buddy?
What's your name? What's your name? What's the names? Oh, we got gilling right?
Fuck am I?
Gilling great. Gill. What's up buddy? You've been here before. How you doing buddy?
Life show. Welcome back. Good good.
Yeah, you want to and can you give it to Gray?
Gray.
Gray.
Yeah, right.
What do you do besides fucking tie women up in your base?
It really makes me sad to look at my fan base.
Exquisitely, I'm gonna be factual right now.
This is not working.
This is serious.
I'm a teacher actually.
Teacher of what?
Fucking sharpening knives?
What?
Teacher of discipline?
Teacher of what?
English.
Middle school, yeah.
Oh really, that's great.
In the Bronx. Hey, if I needed you to help me with English
Would you help me? Sure. How much would it cost me to hire you? Oh, it was a private teacher
No, no, I want to join your fucking school
I got on the orphan before
Well, would you do it?
That's just a stranger quite I don't know
What would you do it? That's such a stranger.
I don't know.
I just think, you're going to go teach.
I need help with fucking periods.
I don't know. I never really thought of it.
I probably get a good deal out of me as you can see
because I'm not coming up with a number.
All right. What do you Catholic, right?
Yeah.
And I...
What did you do?
Right.
Why are you laughing?
Why are you laughing?
How did you do that?
How did you do that? How did you know that?
How did I know that?
What do you do to get a Catholic to go to do to race?
Is it the shorts?
I thought that was a little...
Can I tell you why I know?
Look at his fucking Catholic fingers.
A little...
What was a fucking crease fingers?
How was it...
Races if he's a Catholic?
Well, you talk about that.
I said Catholic, they start laughing.
I thought.
But how would it be races? I don't know, I just said it. Can you not fucking break down everything?
Let me try to send was going well you can let it do in your head
Well, thank you for coming. Yeah, right sure. You're an English teacher for middle school. Do you sign summer reading?
I do you do what it just actually made a Lord of the flies reference which I appreciate because I signed that for my
it's a good
a conch here with the kids home and it's only reading level
so that they're not gonna stand teachers
it seems like a nice guy man yeah whatever he probably got somebody tied up in his
vein right now what are you saying that all teachers are fucking what with the
wear glasses white shorts
He doesn't he doesn't do anything like that
Hey, so
You got any hot kids in your class
There is little to
Do not answer that I'm not deleting anything under the show.
You're getting fired from some shitty, I'm well away from 70.
I'm just going to the show.
What are you going to start sweating?
Well, thank you for listening to the show, dude.
Yeah.
And thank you for coming in.
You a premium member?
I'm not going to lie.
As of today, I'm going to be because I'm going to want to listen to this and watch it as soon as I get home.
Well, I want to tell the nerd like that, I really want to get us real quick with premium members
I have one guy go third. I'm quitting the premium thing because it has him
I don't see much of a difference well
Here's the fucking difference number one you're supporting the show by giving a couple bucks a month
So you're supporting all these fucks that he work here, okay?
Number two, that's a big one. Number two I started
doing one-on-ones again that I go only go behind the paywall. I'm gonna be doing Colin Quinn.
I just did Christopheau is amazing. I'll be doing one-on-ones putting them behind the paywall.
We have a new show coming out August 30th at the village on the ground. It's a show I'm producing from the ground up called Creeps with Kids.
It's me, Bonimic Fallon, Louis J. Gomez and Jim Florentine.
Ron Bennington is hosting it. So it's basically us going up, doing our stuff about parenting, being parents, and having kids, and then we're going to do
a panel on parenting. It's called Creeps with Kids. It's going to be August 30th, so that's
going behind the fucking paywall. So if you see alive, good for you, if you don't, you're
going to have to be a premium member. I'm trying to create this stuff, but for all you
premium members, $1.99 a month, not six, not seven, not 14, like everybody else,
fucking charges.
$1.99 a month, that's it.
So if you're not a premium member, become one, you get a lot of great shit coming up.
And you know, let's say if you can't afford it, I get it.
It's only $2 to be premium.
It's $1.99.
I got that on me right now.
Can I go ahead and pay now?
You can just go this way.
You do, you go to the phone.
Uh-huh. And on iPhone and Android, I download that free app. now. I can I go here pay now you can just go this way you do you go to the phone Uh-huh, and on iPhone Android download that free app free
Rejoin you joined from there two seconds and it comes right out
Oh, you put a right for a cup of coffee, but now coffee seven bucks good. It's price for a fucking nothing
I'm a hundred percent less than a cup of coffee. It's price a gum. I guess now. I know what is one?
What asshole is out there? That's not a a premium I don't know what what assholes
Listening that you don't spend them dollar 99 everyone who doesn't spend the dollar 99
Fucking ass
You got on if you ain't trying to be now and you didn't pay the dollar 99 fuck you
I'm trying to move you in a tear
This week I add to bitch.
Fucking bitch.
I know I was away in a room, but
and first of all, I love that gig.
It's a fucking, it's literally a free vacation.
I was there for nine days.
I went with my three-year-old and my wife,
which is not a really vacation.
Going through fucking customs with a kid. That's fucking fun when he runs under the
fucking line and you know you're gonna get tossed out of a
country because this fucking twok can't fucking stay still for
fucking eight seconds and then whatever I did why I bet you
he's not a premium member. I tell you what the last the last show
the last show I hear him in the crowd I'm up there fucking having the
best show all week
I'm just fucking annihilate right and all of a sudden I hear his voice. I go is that my kid?
He comes running up on stage
No fear gets on stage takes the mic and just starts talking to the mic. Oh full house
They killing to the point where I was like okay get the fuck
I can't follow fucking Cosby with kids.
So I had to tell him to beat it.
My arm gets hot though.
Huh?
That room gets hot.
When I was out there, it's a great shot.
It's a mother fucking great club.
I mean, it's this great little club.
Here's the best part.
At 9 o'clock, the show starts at 8.30, at 9 o'clock or 9.30, I walk, I go out my door,
I walk fucking 18 feet to the show.
Oh wow.
So it's right, you go out team feed,
hey I'm ran, you have enough of Robert Kelly,
he does, I go up, I do my shit, you're done,
a half hour a night.
Did you piss on the stage?
Because the room was too far back, you know what I'm doing?
But I pissed him, I piss on my hands
I sick piss right on my hand
Shout out a rubble right shout out to Ray Ellen. Well, you know, it's like people fucking love him. I hate him
I don't know what's going on with that. I don't understand. He's been then with nice to me
Yeah, well, it's good. I'm Patricia's cell the time. It's good for me. It's good
You know, you mean it's like that fucking guys an asshole. I he's there
Patrisha's sale the time was good for me is good. You know what I mean?
It's like that fucking guy's an asshole.
He's in the main.
So I can't fucking try.
He's never done shit to me man.
And the fucking and he puts on these shows.
If you look at the lineup, you're like, there's nobody sucks.
Yeah, that's it.
He's putting on like crazy fucking amazing shows at the
Marriott Stilaris in a room.
It's fucking great.
Anyways, but I was gone and fucking America fell apart I almost didn't come home yeah seriously
man they fucking canceled Marin
I almost get in fuck what the fuck I don't understand what's happening. It's fucking done.
He wasn't even resisting.
That's what I'm just going along with it.
It's crazy.
I know where you stand on all this.
Yeah.
What do you mean by that?
I just said that.
Just again, because I like to get you going.
You're going to be left-wing liberal.
I think cops shouldn't kill, shouldn't murder people in the streets.
That's my liberal, that's my...
Where should they murder them?
In a nice...
Quietly?
Yeah, quietly.
If you just do a quiet...
I don't understand.
It's like you're on fucking...
You know you have to know you're being filmed.
Yeah.
You have to know you're being filmed, right?
You have to know that're being filmed. Yeah. You have to know you're being filmed, right? You have to know that you're being filmed somewhere.
Someone has a fucking camera somewhere.
And you're fucking, poem, I don't, yeah.
Well, that's the, there's no repercussions.
Well, that's where it, in my brain,
and I'm gonna say this, I don't think it's,
I wanna go out and kill black people.
I think they're in this situation where they were the alpha male
Like I never get no fight with somebody if you have you have fun? No, because I live in a civilization
I'm gonna say it's not a big deal, but I don't really I haven't thought I'd like to talk my way I'm not listening buddy. I'm not saying you have to follow. I was a question
I wasn't it wasn't a right or wrong answer to yeah, I know you got a little fucking weird with that. There's not a right. I'm just asking you if we
have a question. No, I heard you say that. Because my point is this, that if you, I've done it,
you come off. I'm going to beat the fuck out of you, right? And you get first black kid
I have a fight. Beat your ass. No. I was, he was a little thin motherfucker and I remember we fought and I punched him with everything I had and
Nothing this motherfucker came just kept fighting. I hate him again, and I kept what I go dude
What I literally had to go do looks I went as just skin different
Like I never fought a black kid before but this kid and it my my
Myself a steam was like you know what I mean?
Where you get fucked up because now you know this guy this cop is coming in get the fuck down
Get the fuck and they're taught you don't when you're when you bring it somebody the ground
You don't slowly do it. You don't you come in
Streaming and yelling because you want it to be like a flashbang
You want somebody to be and then they're on the ground.
And some guys don't do it a little overboard, right?
And they bring them all of a sudden they're fighting and they say he has a gun.
I don't know what would take, I don't know how your point blank puts something to somebody's
chest.
I don't know where that, how that comes, where that, where was he going to put his gun
out when you got, you laying on one of his arms. Yeah. He's sitting on the, but his other thing, how many cops, where that, where was he going to put his gun out when you got, you
laying on one of his arms.
Yeah.
And you sitting on the, but his the other thing, how many cops do you look at and you go,
this guy could not pass the physical fitness test.
You know the test, the test is so easy.
Yeah, but that's what that's kind of the thing here is you're like, you got two guys, two
guys can't get down one guy.
Like you look at these cops and you're like, well, these guys, like there's a reason I'm
not a cop.
Because my first thing is gonna be,
I'll shoot I got, you know?
Right, right, right, right.
You run, I'm gonna bust you right.
But it's like, it's like so many of these cops,
it seems to be, or it's like when they did that,
when the fucking horrible thing,
that poor guy selling cigarettes in Staten Island,
and the guy uses like a chokehold,
like a fucking wrestling move.
And it's like these are, are Eric Garner and it's's like these cops are raised on like WWF all this bullshit.
They're scared.
Right.
It's this fear.
That's the fear of black men.
That's my point though.
Is that when you get enough, when you get in this thing and you on all of a sudden you're
losing.
You get afraid and you have this thing on you.
That you know, I end everything. None of these situations have been losing efforts. I mean the last couple
ones have been ridiculous point blank like almost executions.
Well, in the beginning it's like you tried to defend cops like I tried to defend
cops in the beginning and then like every video has been like now I'm forced to
say it worse and worse. Now I have to go like I said, listen, does
the reason he shot the toddler?
Guys guys. It's a kid.
It's very dangerous.
They're very fast.
They're little.
It's insane.
He had a note when it was.
He just said a note.
Look, if you do the numbers, if you do the percentages
of cops versus killings, there's more cops helping people.
There's more cops doing right.
So you say cops, you blanket cops.
But it's not, you're talking about bad cops.
So there's a big difference between saying cops.
There's a lot, there's cops standing there
getting fucking attacked by protestors.
They're literally protecting the people that fucking don't like them, making sure that nobody...
They go to fuck...
Not that happens, you're right.
They have to go and protect people's freedom of speech.
The people that say fuck you cops, they have to go make sure if I went over and I started fucking shooting them,
they would fucking take a bullet for you,
even though you were protesting against them.
Right, and it sucks for those cops,
but y'all are just seeing a few deaths
on that it happened to get recorded.
How many back you get killed?
Before cell phones had a fucking camera.
Absolutely, there's no way this isn't you.
And also here's the other thing,
the few bad abs.
We're way better than the 60s. Well, that's up
I got a good
But the stupid happens. I mean it's like why don't it's have film in the 60s? Yeah, I've got you right
There's really tough but why shouldn't cops be like shouldn't cops be appalled at that?
That's the thing that I'll get is whenever something like this happens
It's all about being defended. No every cop never want to go against each other
But that's the problem that's the problem, but's like the mommy. That's what about that thing
What about like a public service? I was watching some by cops who were corrupt back in the 80s
And they they said why didn't any cops you know say you this was going on they goes cops never do that to each other
Listen, there's a lot of good cops for every guy
I know who became a cop and I got it. I was like without exception was a psychopath
What somebody goes you know you know Anthony's a cop now I'm like he used to beat up paraplegically. He used
to beat the kid in the wheelchair. Yeah he's a cop. Every time that kid do to
get in the wheelchair.
the wheelchair. Hi, hi, hi.
Yeah, probably a piece of shit.
It's a male job.
It's an alpha male job.
It's an alpha male job with the process.
It's a good job.
I mean, you have benefits that you make a good living off it.
And everybody.
That's the most good thing.
That's the most good thing.
I'm in the house.
I'm two years away.
You have a problem right now.
That's the most cleanest logic ever. You benefit. You're the problem right now. You're the most clean, you're the logic camera.
You're better fit, you're gonna afford a couch.
You know the other reason why you're the two family house?
You know the other reason why you're the coppers
because of the hat, you don't wanna fuck up with that.
It's an alpha male job and there's too many people
that's not alpha males that are doing it.
What about training?
Training, is training something to do with it too?
What do you mean, training is not that?
Is there an issue with the training?
I mean, clearly there is.
No, they ain't doing good.
They're too good.
Yeah, but it's definitely, it just seems like.
And there's like an in-bred thing because, listen,
there is a racial component here.
Because here's the deal.
I've been pulled over.
I had a suspended license.
I had the same exacting that that guy Philando, the Kistile
had.
And they just look at me and they go,
he's some fucking fat white guy who's not gonna have a gun
and they look at a black guy and they go,
this guy probably, you know,
the guy had a gun.
The guy had a gun.
I mean, was that a perm?
That's another perm.
That's another issue.
But here's the thing, if you look at that thing,
the video was taken after.
But apparently, he went for the, he said, said we don't know because we don't know what happened
We're going from what she said we know it. We don't know he went
He said don't move and he moved to go get his thing and this guy shot
But you can tell by his said to the cop I have a wet
Yeah, no who that is gonna shoot you Bobby is gonna tell you I have a way with his baby girl
I fucking a
Fucking bomber a for what was the motivation a shoot a cop?
I know I had a joke, but it didn't come out
We live in a civilization
I'm with star roast on this, but I'm not but I'm just saying I put myself in that situation
I don't think he's out you can just be with you
I'm thinking of that in that moment. I'm just thinking of that
I'm just thinking of that
You gotta think here's a thing who cares if he has a gun and wants to shoot me who cares if he tells me or he doesn't tell me
But why you automatically going oh this guy's I'm about to get killed like right over a guy his babies
Why is it escalated why Why is it escalated?
That's what that's what seems to be happening here
Is it not okay now? Here's a here's a thing too. I'm gonna bring this up now every time this happens
There'll be a cop or somebody will put the video out you think a cop's job is easy
Look at this video and they show a guy just walking up. Hey, how you doing?
You know bang bang man. He's just the guy just shoots him
They show a cop walking up being a nice guy and he gets fucking shot. They show there
You're we're acting like we're acting like you understand every time a cop gets out of that car and walks up to a car
Every fucking time
He is putting his he could not see his family, right?
We're not we're talking
every time it doesn't matter if it's a little woman a fucking white person a
black person a putty whoever the fuck it is every time that could be that's
it's a military lives are in danger constantly there are rules of
engagement that they have the file before they fire on people are you saying
that a cop walking up to a car is in more danger than somebody walking down
the street in Fallujah Iraq oh first of all first of all a cop walking up to a car is in more danger than somebody walking down the street in Fallujah? I rack.
Oh, first of all, nobody's walking up to anybody in Fallujah.
Well, no, there's not two thousand fucking eights, okay?
There are rules.
I know that, but there are rules.
But what you just said, I don't like you bringing up SUNY triangle references.
I wanted to get far, but what you just said brings up, if you, if you're, whatever that is, don't do it. I want to take that far, but what you just said brings up if you I don't
Exactly, but you know About Leonard's really threatening. I don't know what it is
But if you know if you know that's you know kind of job minutes to get the gun
But it's like you know we understand that like the cop that shot the off land of like you could tell from him from his reaction He was scared he was scared. But I'm not mad at cops like that.
Okay, I could chop that up as an accident.
I could fathom that.
But it's these other ones where you got four videos of,
yeah, pussy, shut up bitch.
And on top of this man, it's not saying nothing.
That's not doing, that's what I can't get over.
That's crazy.
But the guy who the Chinese cop I believe he was,
he wasn't even a white cop.
Right.
He was a Chinese cop.
And he was like, he moved, they told him nothing he was fucking legitimate. He was scared scared that he was scared
He had his gun. He was like I told him on the fucking movie moved
Yeah, but he and she the girl was literally the commas if I just got shot
I would hope my wife would shed a fuck not video he did he just
Her boss, but he saved her life dude she saved her life
buddy if she didn't really she said she was the only one life that think about this
yeah holy shit think darkly for a minute if he got a gun she got a gun she's the only
witness in that car first of all let's not get racist okay I keep walking in there. I'm just gonna think.
Jesus, wow.
You're the fuck a problem.
I'm fucking, I'm fucking, the fags are off.
We're the fuck.
We see, we see color.
The whole rainbow.
She's the only one in the car.
She's the only one in the car.
Yeah, absolutely.
Think about it.
Well, I don't think she saved her life.
I think that this guy legitimately fucking,
he, again, he panicked.
He was nervous going up to the car.
He's got this fucking, he's got a gun on his hip
and he told the guy not to move and this idiot
He fuck you up. Okay, here's another idea. You fucked up. Wait, wait, but what you want to do?
You like this is what I want you know what I want you do is I think cops should have non
Non lethal form of
Restraining sadly not not a fucking taser. Why is he got his why is he got his gun out?
They taste the guy Louisiana saying it big guiding go down
No, I'm not saying I'm not saying it because I do know someone forget the same time
I know innocent but I know something because I grew up with it up with a capi always so I'm not saying that
I have a chocolate
Yeah, of course you can
I bought these for you guys these are these a few guys. I brought from a room
But they didn't make them back on the plane. I want to open it up
I'll take a job with it's for deep blue
It's for deep blue. Let's go bow and Lauren, but I
There should be there should be not only for options. That's the thing. Why is it a gun always and I don't know and it's we are talking about racism
To here because these cops are scared of black people to them a black person is a threat to them
It's not just a guy. It's someone who potentially could kill them in that's just racism and there's a problem because I mean two thirds
Do you think it's all cops?
Well, here's there's a representation problem our cops don't look like our like societies like
Well, there's a thing you can't force people to want to become cops and we've lowered a lot of standards already
You can't force them, but you can recruit. No, you know what I mean?
Sure, why is it like why is it all this?
Things you know because they're idiots
Why is it all scumas right because it's not a job for brilliant people that think the world is there
Yeah, but but all two thirds of cops are not getting John D. Rock. It's male. It's male white guys, right?
It's and bikes right right like no, no, I mean
But I mean seriously the two thirds of cops that they hire they did but it's mostly white guys right?
No, white guys are one third of college. Yeah, it's called Lawrence type
Has ever fucked I don't know I just mean it should be cops should look the way it should be the same demographic breakdown as as black
Greek gay straight we have real serio we gotic we got Mexican Mexican right? We got Indian I mean we got a we got a tie and I we got fucking crazy everybody's here
We got German murderer
I just enjoy a chocolate together
I prefer what shot we we
But he is the other thing it gets me like a lot of these comics that are going out and pretending to protest and doing all these things and
They're taking selfies at pro that's fucking bullshit. Who's doing that? There's people that we know on I'm not gonna shout out names
But it's a good posting. No guys go to all my
T.C. And you take it selfies at a pro and it's like, you know what?
Here's a reality the reality is that's a real thing and for that to work
You should be willing to go to jail
You should be willing to engage in real civil disobedience.
And you shouldn't be there to help your career.
So let's touch on this then.
Here's the deal. Let's touch on this.
Now the guy who went and took out six cops.
Right.
You cool with that?
No, of course not.
Of course I'm like,
that's the that's the fouls of here where it's like where it's like
this was like,
yes, I am.
Yeah, kill all cops.
No, no, no, no, these people, they're good.
They're really good.
Letters done with this.
Yeah, Leonard's gonna leave the wallet on my podcast.
I'm like, I'm not gonna knock my bottle over the door.
Somebody take his bottle away.
No, you should obviously, innocent people shouldn't die.
We shouldn't be for, but you don't think some people are okay with that.
People are Facebook.
Yeah.
People are Facebook.
They're okay with it.
They're literally saying, good.
Those are split between two people.
Those are racist on the other side or people just caught up in emotion right now.
But there's also people that believe that violence does change things.
Listen, here's, here's, here's, you know, here's the deal.
It's a proven fact.
I mean, it is like, I don't believe.
Listen, at the end of the day, like, and it's true, I got to agree with Leonard, there
are people that go, well, listen, look what ISIS is doing.
All we talk about is ISIS.
They got, they got the attention.
You know what I mean?
So at the end of the day, I might not agree with it, but at the end of the day, it is
the most extreme method of trying to affect change. I'm not saying it's good
Right, it would totally backfire though if that was there was some kind of organized movement to kill cops in America
You know how much they would backfire what a PR like nightmare that
And we're not saying they're behind it right let me say in the behind it
But we're saying that okay, I want everybody to live.
I don't want black people to die.
I don't want cops to die.
I don't want anybody fucking dying.
Why is it okay?
And that's most people.
I mean, most people who aren't fucking protesting.
Right.
Most people don't fucking protest,
but you got an agenda over here
that was like, let's take this opportunity.
And there's some people on that side or well
That's what happens when you do this no, that's how the fucking you can don't it at all right somebody taking a gun and
Executing people because somebody they believe somebody else did it right that's fucking that's crazy
Of course it's crazy, but I don't think it's fair to sit to equate that i mean like that's the amount of time that happens all of all that you're looking at my my
my fucking demographic i know he's an English teacher but you know it down
okay yeah it's not the same there's way more radical people on the right there's
way more radical like racist who do want to kill black people than there are
radical leftist i mean if we keep it up and it's gonna be like Lord of the flies
Only I think is radical people on both sides. There's dangerous people on both sides
There are people that are gonna do the wrong thing on both sides, but at the end of the day Here's a deal if you say sides to get them trunks up
But at the end of the day, listen in in black communities have felt that for years
The relationship with the cop was and I I have no idea what the fucking relationship
I used to get high and drive around nice areas in Long Island because I wanted to see houses
And I would tell my friends like I want to see the big houses
We're going to Sand's point and we drive around rich area smoke a pot and like be like look at that one and and if a blind person did that
It probably would have ended differently
You know what I mean? Yeah, it wouldn't have been gay, but the
Everett one but
But here's a deal it's like people say all white privilege isn't real
It is we are because I was able to do that
It is really real.
Black people, we tired.
Look at Bobby.
We not just the, we not.
I love that we're all talking.
We little we have a black person here.
We're not even let talk.
We tired.
Stop roast.
Stop roast is more black than it was.
We tired of this shit.
And this is the common thing.
We're not just tired of we getting killed
We're not just we people die every day. We not just tired of we getting murdered in the street
We're not getting no justice. Right. Nobody's hearing nothing of people dying
Travelled Martin
That day, uh, dude Eric Garmin got that one wrong. Let's be honest. Travelled Martin guy guys that guy took that to be a fucking psychopath
Yeah, that's it.
Zimmerman, Zimmerman.
Yeah, but it's like we're not getting no justice.
All these cops, we're not getting no, oh, he got fired.
He got fired.
But they still get paid.
That's the crazy thing.
I mean, when you get on these defense,
well, now how are you going to pay your rent?
Not murder people.
Right.
There is that code.
Like, what do they call code of blue silence?
Like, it's a thing that cops really believe.
Like, she's fun.
These are my brothers. That's one of you want to I was a subprime mortgage guy.
I get that when the feds come in.
He's got a fucking fucking start
right.
I mean like what do you see?
You don't start talking about they did you sign 10 people's
like it's like
prime code of silence.
It's almost like bloods and crypts.
Right.
The cops of crypts black people bloods
But we they can shoot it up, but we can't shoot it up right they got and they got that's that's not true anymore
That's not true
I got a guy took out six of them
Yeah, but he gets to the medium can I say something about where he yet?
Well, he's fucking where's he it? He's dead and he's not let's go
Let's go talk about it. They took him up the list of black people that got killed by cops and let's see what those cops
Take out the list of black people that got killed by black people. It's way more and where those black people let the kid those black people
They're in jail and when those cops hit the kid those black people they're out living right now
They listen to the fucking fucking black people in jail
I don't know. I'm not sure.
But you're not a premium member.
I'm not sure.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member.
I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. I'm not a premium member. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Our alpha male and a little, it's a different mentality than you. I relate to an alpha male.
I grew up with alpha males.
I had five Irish Catholic uncles, all alpha males, all my friends were alpha males, but
I also got along with nerds.
I also got along with gay guys.
I also have another side of me that I can switch on and be a fucking dweep.
And because of the people I met in my life,
I had so many other influences in my life,
male influences that were,
I had a gay Jewish man was my foster father.
I had a fucking, you know, I had a bunch of foster parents,
I had a bunch of counselors,
so they influenced my life.
So I wasn't, I didn't grew up to be this Boston fucking,
third, fuck Boston fucking third,
fuck the fucking blacks, the cops, you know what I mean?
I grew up with a lot of black friends, right?
Because I was, you know, when I went to Juve Hall
and my school before that was a mixed school.
But for every one of you, it's 10.
They don't believe in that.
I don't think so.
I think there's more of the other way.
I do.
I can't tell you why.
Every white guy that grew up liking black people
grew up not racist for every one of you.
Okay, let's say five.
But I think you're wrong.
I think the generation that's coming up now
is more tolerant of everything.
I think the generation's behind me way better
with gaze and blacks and Indians.
But no, I think we're, that's the thing we always forget is that we're dealing with generations from a long time ago that are still embedded in there.
We're talking people from the 50s and 60s and 70s, they're in the, when that filters out in
20 years, what? 30 years, 50 years. We're gonna be a way different society in America than we are now.
We're all gonna be in the town of the old society.
Because you wouldn't be, the way we talk having this podcast
60, 70 years ago, we'd be fucked. I'd be shut down. The FBI would be in here. Tell me,
are you fucking, I'd be a fucking communist. We'd all be on a list. Yeah. My, my grandmother,
fucking six jackasses can fucking say dumb shit. And nobody said, what about your grandmother?
God. She, no, she complains about Puerto Ricans. Yeah. She's a hundred percent Puerto
Ricans. She's 80. She's 80. My grandfather, she doesn't like Puerto Ricans. She's one hundred
percent Puerto Ricans. My grandfather, who, she does have. She's a great father. She doesn't like Puerto Rican. She's 100% Puerto Rican.
My grandfather, who he was.
She does have a point.
She was very good friends.
My grandfather was very good friends with the neighbors
next door for years, for 30 years.
He called them the colored people.
Because when he grew up, that's it.
And then I, dude, you can't say that anymore.
I was like, why?
He thought he wasn't saying anything.
It's like, you don't say that.
It's African American.
He was like, really? What the fuck is that? Like, didn't make sense to him? He thought he wasn't saying anything. It's like you don't say that. It's African-American music really
I what the fuck is that like didn't make sense to them? Yeah, but the difference is though like that stuff
Those people have put into place like our police departments the the code and the sort of culture
Happened 50 60 years ago, but that changed around it's changing not in the police
There's a black do you see the black woman the black cop that fucking literally called out her whole fucking
thing.
Right.
If that, you think that could have happened 50 years ago?
But we should be asking if that could, a woman wouldn't be on the fucking force.
Never mind a black woman.
Right.
So the progress is being made.
Sure, but progress is not enough.
And that was, but I have to fucking,
Lulee, that video went viral.
And you know how many people saw that and it affected?
You know how many people saw a black woman,
a cop, an officer calling out her other fucking car.
That, that, that, that, that ripple will affect a lot of shit.
You know how many people watch the man take his last breath
and find his daughter. There's not enough change. Oh, I thought that was a show you
talking about. No, I thought there was a new movie. It's watch this man take his last breath.
Was that his daughter or his? I thought his daughter was in the back seat. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. How do you shoot a man? I think people just send just have a. Now what happened?
What happens with the trial? But here's the trial Why should that's not it should be an independent thing? It shouldn't cops always are in charge of
policing cop raising police other cops. It needs to be in the that's what people see is the problem
That's the
They should go through what we have to go through right
They shoot a guy you should be able to say listen this is my case. This is their right no through right I'm saying that I don't I don't look it is not because if if he
shot a white guy if that Chinese cop if that was a white dude and that was a white
woman with a white kid in the back the same circumstance and circumstance
should be it's still a trial. Right.
But here's the thing.
And he was saying the same shit.
You know, it's like, it kind of, it's like a trial.
Yeah, absolutely.
But it's like, would we believe him more that he accidentally did it and he was nervous
and he fucked up?
But you can't, or did he, or did he, he wouldn't get to that point.
But did he, we still saying that this guy just killed this fucking guy?
Yeah, what about the one from the ocean?
You're not allowed because you accidentally kill someone like I'm
I mean first of all I think the fact there's black absolutely
Heiton the probability that he's gonna die in that all the right with cops
But it doesn't matter if he killed me for his black what matters is a cop killed someone with the who never got there
Just you're upset not allowed to just go I was I was
No
I was
I got
I was
I was having a
Like you get like as a comment you can go on stage and bomb say well you know I was nervous
Right and think about it's not a bad set this is somebody's life
Right right right
This is like
But also
But what about it?
This is like this is the thing like why is the gay white guy making more points than you
No, he's making points
He's making points. It was a fucking joke. Why do you stick up for this fucking liberal?
I just don't get it. What about the one last year where the guy was running away and someone video
T for my honey chainly and back Carolina yeah in South Carolina and the cops shot him in the back a bunch of times
I mean he at least with the jail that's
He did
I think you're more sure that he's been going right did. It's like, I didn't hear much.
I think he's been going right away.
And it's like, you make some good points.
It's like your points.
We're being shown being slaughtered.
Not kid.
It's not like we fighting back.
It's people getting killed.
It's not even putting their hands on the people.
Well, look at you.
The guy, the one guy was resisting arrest.
How do you see him? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Look at you are the guy the one guy was resisting arrest
Said to me get on the ground right hand behind you back, right? You would see me lying on the ground It's the top try probably on the my side my stomach. I was still teeter
But and I would put my hands behind my back, which still again
I would be because
It fucking it blows me away that a cop says put put put your hands behind you back because because but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but when the don't fucking resist the rest when yeah they they you don't want to
fuck you know how that usually goes you know how that usually goes like how how
get on a get on the grant they already on you okay but how am I get on the
ground you are you holding me up okay I'm a rest and you got me on my he's laying
on his arm I'm gonna give you my other arm why you why is he fighting though why
you fighting it's not fighting you why was he fighting I'm asking give you my other arm. Why you why is he fighting though? Why you fighting? It's not fighting you
Why was he fighting? I'm asking you question. Why was you fighting?
What fish is gonna move cuz you got your hands on it. Yeah, but the fish doesn't have comments sense
Fish doesn't have common sense. We don't so there's a few
I want the fuck does a fish. No, no fucking what do you my wife you?
What the fuck does a fish? No, no fucking what do you my wife you? What are you saying? What are you? What are you? What are you?
Whatever go ahead? No, you're a fucking
For all they don't you right you're a fucking cop out. Are you around?
I'm not what the fuck is a fish? What does a fish have to do with anything if you tell a
You're right. That was a bad analogy, but you
Don't get mad at me because you're fucking fish. You look at him. I'm a gun
He's like a nice he's like a nice
There take that
That way he's like if you're holding a nice real piece of fish
But the fish was a stretch
I'm expecting for calling me out of my bullshit
I have a candy. Okay, I'm also going to have to explain that.
Explain that.
And in a context-free environment, in a vacuum, yes.
Stop what you're vacancy, your context-free.
We know you went to school.
I'm just, what I'm saying is...
I do graduate, yeah.
This is an image. It's not an image. I'm actually what I'm saying I'd degraduate. Yeah, he's the he dread he this is an image. It's not an image
I am actually pretty dumb, but the thing is I
People think I'm way Bobby thinks I'm fine anyway. What I'm saying is that all that guy also has had a life a
Lifetime of cops just being dicks to him for no fucking reason. How do you the guy what guy?
Almost any black guy honestly like you know, You don't know any of these fucking guys.
Bobby, if it was just people resisting,
it would be more understandable.
It's a 12 year old kid with a BB gun.
It's the fact that that girl Sandra Blan goes in
with a routine traffic stop and she's,
it's the black kids have a much higher incidence
of going into the system, being ignored for parking tickets
and shit like that and then they rot in a jail cell, kill themselves,
it was an incident right because I'm more of a Republican.
I don't agree with Starvers on mud.
I think cops are piece of shit
because they're in fucking unions.
But he is yet, that's why I hate cops.
They're fucking unions.
But he is a deal.
You gotta look at the whole picture.
It's not just like a one guy that's,
it's pulling up on a 12 year old kid to me
or rising going, oh, that's probably a real gun.
We've got to use lethal force. It's shooting up on a 12 year old kid to me a rising line. Oh, that's probably a real gun. We've got to use lethal force.
It's shooting somebody in the back
and you take the whole picture
and now you start to look at it and go,
oh, there is a systemic problem.
There is a problem.
And I think there definitely is a problem.
And I think that unfortunately,
that makes a word.
Yeah, I think so.
You know what I'm saying?
As I was saying it, I'm just asking. As I was saying it, I didn't even know. I went, I was saying? I was saying it. I was asking.
I was saying it. I didn't even know.
I'm just going to throw it out there.
Bobby won't know.
Bobby's not going to know.
Bobby's not going to know.
If it's a word or not, I knew it was some bullshit
because of you guys' hands.
Yeah.
He's using his hands all on this bullshit.
But before I knew it, the first time I knew what that word was. Go ahead. Before we move on, I don't know, that's bullshit. I knew it the first time I knew what that word was.
Go ahead.
Before we move on, I don't want to gloss on something.
I think it's very important that we were saying before,
which is you're going to have an issue if a cop
issue lay down.
You are because you're just saying, you said it yourself,
you can't get the hand behind your back.
I said that.
Yeah, now you're saying it twice.
Yeah, but we're going to have an issue here.
I don't want to gloss over that
I have a lingering concern
You just actually made a good point you know how many you know how many fat black people are in the world a lot
So lay on the ground and put your hands behind your back. I can't nothing got shot in the back
So let's come up with the thing why you get on it one knee
Look a baby elephant and put your hand on your knee and your other hand on your nose. How's that? I don't know. What do you want to say? I think there is a systemic system.
What is it?
I can't do that.
There's a difference between, he had a computer.
I think there is a problem and I think that but unfortunately I think and I could be wrong
But this is just my theory
Is there is that these videos and these deaths are?
Is what is going to help?
People in the future what's gonna help the police force this stuff brings down
future. What's going to help the police force. This stuff brings down this shit. When we start ripping ourselves, look at how many people, look at how many people are focused in on
this right now. Look how highlighted this is. Okay. And what happened? I mean, we're,
what happened? What's happened so far? This has been, it's been like a year where a black
person gets killed by the cops every two months. There's like, this, I mean, they're like, they come in bunches. It's crazy. They do. How black person gets killed by the cops every two months There's like this. I mean, they're like they come in bunches. It's crazy
How many white people get killed by cops? Do you know that? Yeah, I just wrote an article on this. How about John March?
It's more but not if you consider the ratio of population
Yeah, so more white people get shot
But if you consider the fact that there's I think 60% yeah
60% more white people get shot.
No, 60% of white people in this country.
Black people are like 10% of the population.
13, 12 and a half.
So compare those numbers.
Then a black people.
It's two and a half more like that.
Two and a half times more.
A guy from Harvard just did a study.
When it comes to lethal force, it's kind of the same.
And the guy from Harvard is a liberal guy who's
kind of surprised by that.
But when it comes to everything, this non-lethal
like getting pulled over all of that stuff, black people far exceed
white people and all of the other altercations with police.
What about jail sentences for pretty crimes and marijuana?
That's what black is much more likely to go to
so it's like, you already got our hands behind our back and
then you're going to kill us too. So I got to I got a fight for
50 years and you still going to kill me. Do you still go? You still go? And then you're gonna kill us too. So I got a I got a fight for 50 years and you still gonna kill me
You still going you still going and then you know
But this is how we feel like I'm not trying to be funny, but it's like y'all killing and y'all not not saying y'all but I'm saying general
They killing us and they not sending the ghost cars no sorry ain't no sorry, right? We've never heard of cops kill somebody and say I
Not even an apology, so I'm sorry. I can respect that I can look a man and I say okay, you killed you killed him
You was scared of him I can respect him, but you just a pop-pop a Nah, he was reason for us
Nah, he had a gun no man. Come on, man. Can you know a sorry? Yeah, sorry? Just one thing if they say sorry
It's a guilt of a mission
I understand what you guys are talking about but I'm not losing my pv a card
Got right out of it. I mean that is right there. To fuck you, you're gonna be dead. I can't wait for you to do it. I die. That's why you haven't said anything
to have Howard. You cops are dead.
I'm on board with it. What else do you have?
Okay, what's your opinion?
There's good and bad people over there.
No, I'm that's here. It's just a fucking
sesame street answer. It's so ridiculous to say that there
is good and bad everywhere.
We're waiting to get dead. They come to us.
We find the truth and love. We're good and bad everywhere. We're going to get die cops out of it. Find the truth and love.
We're good and bad.
I think we got it for a walk outside.
No, it's just ridiculous.
There's bad cops.
It's like this.
And I think you know, you get a bunch of these videos together.
And you can say there might be some differences
if you're one and the next, but the problem,
the overall problem is
Undeniable. What is it?
Everything we've been saying is what are you telling black people are more likely to incur?
It's excess force from police an album out of his fucking fucking
Say what are you I want to cop so bad Bobby. Oh my god. I want that tag that mark
The cops are bad, Bobby. Oh my God.
I want that tag that marked out.
I can crack the joke.
Oh, the cops are bad.
It is funny to know how some conservatives
they'll say, OK, extremist Muslims, now that's it.
Now all Muslims are bad because a small group
of extremist Muslims are doing what they're doing.
But then they'll be like, they can't admit that it's a there's a crop of cops that are bad too you know I mean it's like
they want to absolve the cops there's a few bad cops but it's it's absolved everybody but there's
a few bad Muslims and they want to include those people those extremists in all the Muslims that are
not extremists it just dope to be white man I did like like that's what I'm really not man What do I got you?
I got look is dope. If you watch if you white you get in a stick in situation that that stick this fall right off
But he crazy I was arrested for kicking a fuck the first I got arrested for fucking stay on a gumbo machine
I went to fucking jail. I got arrested for kicking a mail
I got arrested for anything I did it went to fucking duty jail I got arrested for kicking a mail. I got a rest for anything I did. I went to fucking jewelry jail. And I never I wasn't
giving shit. Everything I got. I fucking I I thought what you sound like a
shithead. I'm talking about people you sound like the person you just
described sound like a shithead. Yeah, but I'm talking about I know people that
haven't done anything wrong. They end up with gun. I'm talking about we out at a party in high school
and the police pulled guns on us.
Nope.
I grew up in a nice neighborhood.
I got black friends, white friends.
You pulling guns on us.
It's me, two Chinese kids, two white kids,
but three other black kids,
and you can pull the gun on us out of all these people.
Right.
Now that stuff, you'll never forget.
I mean, yeah, but I hate when people say white people,
you're white, you got it made no I don't
yeah but I don't I hate when people say that you don't have it made but you have
it easier for someone in the exact same circumstances you right the kids who
were in the system that had the same exact defenses but we're black I guarantee
you had a harder time come let me ask you let me ask you something and I know it
doesn't sound like that I know it sounds like and I'm not saying you got
anything easy it was not easy for you but it's that much harder for someone
in your exact same circumstance.
It's also a black.
I want to ask you one question, one question.
And this is some of five.
It's five.
I want to white and grow on the bus.
Four and a half inches.
Fuck you.
It's five when I get two.
I mean, you grew up with your father.
You like you grew up.
No, I did not.
You didn't.
I did not.
What's the, okay, regardless.
What's the number one thing your mother told you grew up. No, I did not. You didn't, I did not. Okay, what's the, okay regardless.
What's the number one thing your mother told you grown up?
The number one thing that she told you to remember in life for you grown up.
What was the number one thing?
Um, I don't, I don't remember.
Don't trust the guy with a limb handshake.
No.
What the fuck is that?
That's what my dad told me.
I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't
remember.
I don't have any, that's what they send told me. I don't have a- I don't have a- I don't have a- I don't have a-
I don't have a-
That's what they send you out in the world with.
Everything else will be cream cheese.
Every figure of authority I had in my life.
Every figure of authority.
Whether my mother, my father, a black teacher,
a black counselor told me because I'm black,
I have to work twice as hard to get half as far.
Right.
Nobody's ever told you that.
Nobody ever told you that.
Nobody ever told you that. Nobody ever told you that. Nobody ever told you that.
I never got, fuck you.
I never got told anything.
So fuck you and your fucking great family
that had great advice.
Yeah.
I didn't have fucking any advice.
I don't have any of those fucking memories.
So fuck you and your mom, your grandma, and your aunts
who fucking, you say, let me tell you something,
you gotta wear it.
I would have loved a pep talk like that.
A fucking Martin Luther King pep talk. They would have sent me down the road to fucking start him like you you cock
Okay, I had nothing and nobody and I was fucking lost so what you're right and you made it I
TV now dude let me say you made it buddy
But I still made I
Was really gonna affect things. I used to have hair.
No, it's possible.
You don't eat hair?
I chewed my fucking stars' chinch from Brad Pitt
to Robert DuVal after my career.
Listen, man, I just don't get that.
I understand what I get the concept of white people
have it easier, but I'm not one of those fucking the concept of white people have it easier
But I'm not one of those fucking people. I've never had it easy. We didn't have money
We didn't have shit and with everything I got I fucking work for I when I walk up my driveway
I'm proud because I shouldn't be there. I shouldn't have it. I didn't have any fucking pep talks
I didn't have any great sayings. I had nobody fucking holding my hand
I had to at least have people ripping their hands away from me
So it's I don't think every white kid has it fucking
Everybody none of that but also the fact just be sad look at fucking South
Yeah, what divorced
Christ
You got divorced not ever married. Oh, I was a the rise of the day what's your book cops again
they're great now we have both we're gonna take a break real quick I look I
understand what you guys are all saying and and you made some you you've
highlighted some things for me because I was out of the country and I didn't
really want to deal with it well I was on, but you couldn't get away from it.
And I just thought it was fucking tragic shit
that was happening.
And now I think with videos and cellphones,
the ability to catch this shit, the ability to find it,
it's like you can't get away with it as easy as it used to be.
It's being exposed a lot more.
And we're going to have to see this hard shit
in our own country. And we're gonna have to see this hard shit in our own country.
And we're exposing ourselves.
We're turning into the fucking Truman show for Christ's sake.
We're watching this shit live on TV,
people's lives that we never got to see before.
And I think with that, things are gonna change.
Because I never thought a cop with a gun could be a bad
thing. Now I'm thinking that maybe it should be, you know, maybe they shouldn't walk up
to a car with a gun. Maybe they shouldn't walk up to the car at all. Maybe there should
be some type of thing that a cop doesn't have to go to the car. Maybe you can talk to
them and have the face time. I'm gonna have a face time. I'm gonna have a face time. I'm gonna have a face time. I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time.
I'm gonna have a face time. I'm gonna have a face time. I'm gonna have a face time. I'm gonna have a face time. Okay, and you're in here. And then kill is it. Yeah, but you can't.
Because you can't.
Because you want them on the car, you can kill them.
No, you should do either.
You shouldn't do either.
You're saying like I'm saying you can do one or the other.
I don't think you should do either.
So don't put that fucking out there.
Like, oh, you can go kill them in the fight.
That's the one I fucking said.
No, fuck it.
You just said it.
I didn't know words you said.
You said. You went, no. We're talking about it in two ways. You said you at no so you we're talking about a situation
Yeah, but you come and when I'm saying is if you tell me get out the car and I get out the car
And I start shooting the police have the right to shoot at me right you don't have to write it
Walk up in my car now ask me for license registration
But I'm saying I have a gun on my hill. I'm reaching for the what I'm reaching for the hey don't reach don't reach but don't reach don't
reach okay freeze don't talk freeze put your hands up and then you still reach
I'm I'm I'm like nervous and shoot ya cuz I'm a fucking idiot and I don't know
how to fuck this is what I'm saying I should I'm the police officer I'm a cop
right no I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna you pull me over no we're gonna play this
out right now let me do this let me head to this okay you're about to retire Cop, right? No, I'm a guy.
You're the cop, what are you?
I'm the guy.
You're the cop, go ahead.
License and registration.
What?
Fuck you.
License and registration. Lices are registration
So that's a total mess. I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you.
I don't wanna talk to you. I don't wanna talk to you. I don't wanna talk to you. I don't wanna talk to you. I don't wanna talk to you. I got a good but I got a permit though
I'm literally sweating
But not gonna you got a permit what I'm saying though. I think that is look man I think this technology the fact that she had a camera on who could record it and we got it the fact that they had
Someone was videotape and the other one, we got it.
But I think that-
But there's no resolution from those, that's the end.
But this, they don't know that yet.
The guy who's right.
We're fucking not that yet.
Hold on, the guy who's videotape.
In previous cases.
And that's what it's like.
But these are all extreme situations, right?
We're just shining a light on it now because, yeah.
What's wrong?
You want to hear how much there is no resolution now
We are cops not getting a job what's filmed the guy who filmed the Eric Garner murder got four years in jail
How explain that I this apparently it's fucking illegal. He didn't listen to
And I could do the jersey or something like that. Yeah, just because he disobeyed a police officer that guy who's a hero
That was for filming and I thought they were like targeting him.
That's all the things.
Well either way he was a target of the fuck.
Well, the dodgy quality of this is horrible.
Well, that's a thing.
That's a quality that really is horrible.
You were shaking and shitting.
That's good.
We have a Mexican wants to say something.
That's not true, the guy had a ruby.
Yeah, I can take a record.
Can you do it now?
Yeah, but he's a man.
Stop, Roses making shit up. He didn't look at Roses making shit up. I had a prime breath. I take a record. Can you do it now? Yeah, but he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,
he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,
he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,
he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,
he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,
he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,
he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,
he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,
he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,
he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,
he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,
he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's I fucking know what now we're now everyone wants no facts how you fucking
Asseld it was fucking either ass
You're hurt your own
You said that he's going to jail because that he took he
We'll take a break and I'll fucking do the research
We're gonna to we are taking a break and I'm gonna have you read this one because you have such a lovely voice
Thank you. My voice just sounds racist, so I'm gonna read this one first
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What do you need? What do you want by the sun? You got me with that one.
We do.
You want James?
I'm James?
I don't drink, but yeah.
I'm James.
Let me just say that he wasn't arrested for the thing directly related to that video.
So I was a piece of shit and I was getting ahead of myself.
Don't do that.
I apologize.
I apologize.
I apologize. I apologize. I apologize to the camera myself. Yeah, so I'm through the cops. So I'm through the cops. I'm apologizing.
I'm apologizing.
I'm apologizing to the camera.
I'm sorry.
I'm going to close up on him.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for jumping the gun there and I apologize.
So he deserves to be in jail.
Well, I didn't say that.
But you know, he's probably, he's probably,
he's probably been targeted by the police
would be my guest.
You know who else jumps the gun?
Yeah.
What?
He beat his wife.
I also want to say, anyway.
That's a nice guy. No, that's a nice guy. It doesn't matter.
No, that's a nice guy.
Well, I want to cop, never done that.
I've never done that.
He's never administered some domestic justice.
He beat his wife, but didn't film it.
But I also want to say though, if you agree with it,
I would say check out campaign zero,
which is a pretty good resource for stuff against cops,
or not against cops,
to improve policing in the country. He just said, stop you right there. It slipped out
what it really is. Stuff against cops. I mean not against cops. If you want to
police, just take out campaigns here. Fuck you, Bobby. Yeah, fucking you, man.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everyone to have equal rights under the table. I'm talking about happy. Can I
ask you? Yeah, please help someone. So we're back.
Um, right.
And for me to what else happened? Well, that was a way.
I smoke a lot of wood. Yeah, folks. What's that?
Pokemon go. What was that? Pokemon go. I don't know.
I'm told anyone to talk about it. I don't know what a real
life Pokemon. Yeah, you take your phone, you scan it, yeah.
Yeah.
And the app will show up and it will say Pokemon are in your area.
Then you have to go and then press, like, a, like, a,
press a picture and it captures the Pokemon for you.
People have died doing this.
Why?
Because they walk into the middle of a street trying to get the
Pokemon hit by a bus.
Really?
Yeah.
One person died.
I also heard something else.
I don't know what this is, but people were talking about today.
There was a security breach in the game.
And they were able to hack into your phone
and send emails out through your email.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Yeah.
No, not a security breach.
They did that.
The makers did it.
I hear you.
It's got so popular, so quick.
It was crashing people's like services
Because it was getting so big so fast. Where are they popping up though?
I don't understand anyway
You go I they could be a Pokemon in this room and you go and take a picture of it
Then you capture it
This is very
Disgusting
After the week that we've had in this country
Really is not a good statement for
Not a good statement for a humanity. It's not.
It's a two big stories.
Every time on, every time black,
people start to rise up.
It's the right man.
It's the right man.
It's the right man.
I'm trying to be funny.
But what had been up?
I forgot.
But look.
But that's another problem.
But the media doesn't be a problem.
Media is dividing this country.
Media is dividing this country.
I watched.
I watched the costumes the other night. It was so racist. Yeah off the bat
I put CNN it was the liberal side. Yeah, it was so bad
I love that where it's like one is super racist and one is just liberal and they're both equally as bad
Do you know what I mean? No, I'm not as bad as Fox News. Yeah, she has nothing. Yeah, that must be seasoned bad as Fox
Yes, yeah, stop roast see the problem of kinds of you
You can't have a conversation with him because he's still
You made up something You get mad look at you little
Happy to have you have a look at you're so mad
Look it all everybody agrees with me
He's fucking phenomenon
I think every should debate and every should have a bag of chocolate
We have a new candy every week.
Yes, it's clear as a table every like five minutes.
Everyone has one of them every week.
It is so much fucking America stinks.
We don't use real milk chocolate.
They use in the fucking in in Dutch aruba.
They use meat milk, fucking chocolate.
In this fat country, someone said,
no, yeah, because they made a fucking
abundance of corn back in the 50s and they go what else can we do with this core shit right right
it's corn syrup so they took it out of Coca-Cola they took it out everything real sugar and they said
here use this instead because it's more expensive for sure and they government does now we're getting
now we're getting now let's get to the next one the end. Just the mad at me trying to kill us. I'm against this.
Stemically, just the mad at me.
Casper.com.
I'm a drink.
He drinking.
Sal.
Where's the james?
It's very fine.
Where is it?
You got it?
I'm going to go to them.
All right, cool.
Listen.
I agree with him.
I know.
I agree with everything you say.
I appreciate it.
I think it's a false.
It's a false like binary. You're uh... you agree with everything you say i appreciate
i think it's a false it's a false like binary thing where it's like uh...
the liberals are just as bad as the conservatives now it's did you know i miss nbc
people are saying like
we should everyone should have health care and on fox news they're saying
black people should respect
i use it you know that the difference streams on both sides of the way
to go to the shields for Hillary Clinton
Who's taking more money from private prisons and any other fucking candidate?
It's in the race when MSNBC Hillary doesn't represent
They're in a shield for her stavros. You're all the
He knows this shit. I'm telling you right now stavros. It is ridiculous. It's not representing. I'm not representing. I'm representing. I'm representing. I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing.
I'm representing. I'm representing. I'm representing. I'm representing. I'm sorry
Both political parties are bad they both have extremes they both suck
Fuck that's right and stavros thinks that what is that?
You just your stavros, huh? The one that what is the other you just you're stavros huh what do you think
what is that one is margillian
actually afraid of politics
if that makes any sense you can ask
you question really out can ask
your question really because you're
very
you're famous you're popular you're
you're you're out there Tom Hanks is
famous listen I'm on channel one
million buddy buddy you know what I
mean and you look at I'm I'm in the public sure yeah I say you I'm on China 1 million. Buddy, buddy, you know what I mean.
I mean, the public, sure.
Yeah, I understand.
You're a public, you have a lot of, look, let me, I went to Comic Con last year, I'll tell
you this.
I went to Comic Con with FX last year, Sex, Strikes, and Rock'a Roll.
I'm walking down the main boulevard, San Diego, the big one.
And all of a sudden there's a line that goes probably from here, I would say all the way
down to the end of Washington Square
Park.
That's how long this line is.
It's a fucking massive.
And I'm thinking, you know, Ryan Reynolds with dead, you know, the cast of X-Man, the
fuck, you know, you know, Robert Downey Jr.
He's going to, he's in a suit flying somewhere.
It's the fucking store front they They rent it out for his show.
In practical jokers. Not only everybody else had all my racist cop friends. Love
the cops and the black. I tell you that fucking store front. The line was out.
They think you gotta break peace together. You can't do this. So you are.
Come on.
Why wouldn't you come?
Because I would never come in and fucking fill up.
But if you guys were like, yeah, fucking hit your pie.
I don't know where you guys stand with me.
We just finally met, like just recently.
But I told you, I told you I've been a fan of yours almost fucking 20 years.
No, I'm a big fan of you guys too.
But I didn't want to come in and be like, hi guys, I'm, you know.
And you guys be like, yeah, we're busy. I didn't too, but I didn't want to come in and be like hi guys I'm you know and you guys be like yeah, we're busy really I didn't want to I
Didn't look at when I meet fake when I meet people and I you I always ruin it and then I I didn't want to you know
So I knew I've literally come to see your show specifically live for over
I'm gonna say 12 13 years ago. I've been I've seen you live. Well that's got I went to see you
I'm so glad that we're friends now. I am so glad to hear.
But my point is, is that dude, you're famous right now.
Are we all friends now?
I get well friends.
So you can help me out.
I actually take like you, and I need you to say that.
I like that.
It's actually very nice to meet all you guys.
I know, I've known all of your names.
I know you would go for a chocolate.
I don't have any more chocolate, so.
Well, you have to go for a chocolate. Now, if we're going to have a real one, chocolate. your names, I know you were a pro. I don't have any more chocolate, so. Well, you have to go with love.
No more chocolate.
No, look at that.
There's no more chocolate.
I got some for you, I'm keeping you relaxed.
I'm bleeding, I'm not fine.
These are, so what are you getting at?
What were you getting at?
I'm trying to get, my point is, is that, you know,
even like, look, I have to be very careful
with the fuck I say.
I have to make sure what I say I mean.
Because I can't be, I'm not the most informed guy.
I really think Stavros is a very intelligent
and informed guy for his opinion.
I think he is very smart.
And you have very intel.
I'm not informed honestly.
I'm not, well, I think you are.
I think you are.
Not as informed as you are.
I really got to watch my image
But you put your images of fucking but your images of fucking lunatic
No, no, it's great, but like I mean are you backing off of this because you know, I'm not backing off
But you have no opinion on it
But it is true like before I had I was in as much of a public
I would be able to sound off more now. I have to say I have to think about what you say because first of all
I already know that I'm not gonna know what not everyone no one's gonna be happy all the time if I say anything
If I say hello heads people like why is it all looking hello?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, so yes, I don't want to like
You know what else I started to think people don't need
It's a it's a conundrum.
It's one of his words.
I like it.
It's a good reason.
Because you want to use the platform that you might have.
But then I also feel like nobody gives a fuck what I think.
Shut my mouth.
I do some show on TV.
I'm a comedian.
And that's it.
And no one's looking for me to weigh in on this.
But they do care about you because they'll use it to fuck with
you. Like if there's somebody who doesn't like you or doesn't like your show, they hear
you say something that they disagree with that they could use against you, they will
fucking take it and blog about it and fucking forward it. And when you're like, whoa, I didn't
I'm not the guy who's going to probably just sound off for no reason, but I won't like
if we're having a conversation on a podcast, I'm not going to not say my real opinion.
Yeah, right.
You know, but, well, I think it's, you know, I mean, like he can say whatever he wants,
it doesn't matter what's going to happen.
He's not going to fucking middle for somebody. So I was going to on a platform, it's seen by 8 to 10 people on the accident.
Literally by accident.
That's a quality show, sir.
Yeah, yeah, that's a good show.
It was a good show.
It was a good show.
It was a good show.
It was a good show.
Yeah, it was a very good show.
It was a good show.
We talk about these shows.
I just respect my manager's show.
Here's a good show. Yeah, can we talk?
I love that you come
You know
You're on camera. You're on camera. You're on camera. You're on camera. Hey, wouldn't it loves you?
You're on camera and you went
You know red tireman in Judy
You know red diamond in Judy
I was talking I fucking had it out with you will ever Joe no, but I know that they great. I had it out with Joe DeRosa
Not really had it up. We me and Keith. I saw Batman versus Superman again. Not to switch it up totally I love you. What do you I?
Before you say your opinion. opinion, what's everyone else?
Haven't seen it.
I love it as a movie.
I'm not a comic book guy.
I don't understand how comic books are made up.
I want Superman never existed.
So how can you get mad about a made up movie, about made up
character?
No, but just did you think it was a good movie?
That was a great movie.
I watched 20, not like 25 minutes of a recently.
I couldn't get through it. was on a pilot to the biggest
Iconic characters in the world and the movie turns out boring got awful
How you have the the writing was so bad. He fucking was about to kill fuck you spoiler nothing
Superman had his big Batman hug on his neck
And he and he goes Martha and goes, why would you say Martha?
And it's like his mother, his mother's, they're both their mother's name was Martha. And
that's what was everyone's gripe with. You're about to fight. And then Lois laying that
fucking asshole. You to go back and do the, no, she threw the fucking
kryptonite sword in a puddle. Right. Why the fuck would you, you don't know who lives in that water,
that could be a water, you just fucked out,
you don't know what that does, you fucking lower on.
Right.
And now you're gonna go get the fucking thing,
you go in, now he's gonna save you, you fucking idiot.
What's amazing is you're gonna save him.
What's amazing is you're as passionate as the cop black issue,
right now. Right now. You're gonna fucking,. What's amazing is your eyes passionate as the cop black issue right now. Right?
You're gonna fucking...
My passion runs deep.
Life to be a passion.
Yeah, I thought it was no good.
Deadpool was great.
It's, it's, it's great.
Left through the whole thing.
Yeah, I didn't understand it.
Yeah.
What, what didn't you understand?
I was high and I fell asleep and I woke up
and he was just joking people
And I was like what the fuck is this a stand-up?
I know you need to see the whole movie. I'm gonna back. I'm about I just got Apple TV
I'm doing all right now. Yeah, I know I heard about that. Yeah, you heard about the TV in my mind
I heard you doing all right. Yeah, you know, I see you commercials. Oh, you saw it. I do I see a lot of them
I was live out like Jersey something. I live in Westchester. Don't ever say that to me.
Oh, I don't really know the difference.
Why?
Because that's like an accent.
That is a naturalist name.
Oops.
Oops.
Like, is that the potato chip?
No, that's not it.
I know you don't spell like that.
Oh, they spell like that.
What?
What?
I've never heard anything like that.
What is the weird one?
It's German.
German, okay?
Yeah, I could tell.
Yeah, I mean, it just lit up, but I'm a cautious lit up.
And it's not, it's not.
Where you from, you're from Staten Island?
Where you from?
Yes, I'm from Virginia.
Chessa B. Virginia.
No shit.
No.
And where you from again?
Long Island.
Long Island, yeah.
You're from Baltimore.
Baltimore.
Oh.
Where you from Scobo?
The wire.
It's from Queens.
Queens.
What about you, beautiful lady? Jersey. I just, I just, I just found out from scobo the wire It's your points. What about you beautiful lady?
Jerkty. Jerkty. I just I just I just found out about scobo that we we did a one-on-one one of those podcasts and he
He went to college for
Puzzle division a baseball division one ball. Holy shit. I can see that you didn't know that well position. I did not know that
I don't get to come up. Wow the hardest position. that's the hardest position though. I believe you see this ass. Yeah, I have it
Watching you leave
Turn around turn around
That's at least four years of crouching down
At least four years of crouching, crouching down. Chris Goeple, think it's over.
Turn around to the camera, you're gonna have to go pick.
Just turn around and stop fighting.
That boy's gope got a dome.
Chris Goeple, go.
Right there, stop, stop.
Is this what you're doing with a future work, Scobo?
You should recreate that doubt.
Kim Kardashian's been for a couple.
Wait, wait, stop, stop, feel it.
Let him feel it.
No.
Stop.
Pretty good.
Is that what you make him do for future work?
It's actually firm, not hard.
Yeah, it's like, if that's what you do, it's like a cast
per mattress.
That's right.
That's right.
He's got a great fucking ass.
Yeah.
What's up with shit y'all on here, though?
What? What did you just say? Why don't you just say what you got? a great fucking ass. Yeah. What's up and shit y'all on your dog?
What?
What?
Why did you just say what you're doing?
Come on, you know what I'm saying?
You just let the whole thing happen.
You just let one man let another man feel you know and he just pimped you out.
No, it happens all the time.
It happens all the time.
I'm not having an apple uncomfortable.
I don't know, you know, I'm having an ass you know.
No, I haven't asked you a bit in my bit and then after the show, I know what it's to touch it.
Willy told me, uh, uh, uh, one of your jokes about your jokes about you guys hips like a lesbian or something like that. Yeah, that's it's hilarious
Bailey J the beautiful female Bailey J who's been on the show many a time in front of mine
Want it wants to fuck his butt would you do it scopo?
Let me ask you
I wouldn't you Let me see a picture. Yeah bring her out she probably got a big big. It's a nice big one. Nice piece. Let's check it out. How you
Have you tasted it? Have you tasted it? Wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait She's got a lot of time. He knows it's big. Oh my god. She, she's a man or woman.
She meant, well, it's a woman.
It's a trans woman.
She'll bust your way.
I mean, my point is that she
have a surgery.
She got the surgery.
She got the surgery.
She got the surgery.
She wants, she's trans woman.
She's trans woman.
She'll pull out and bust on your back.
If you ever, you have to tell you,
it's not trans, but I'm honestly on board.
Are you on board?
100%.
You were lettering.
I think I would.
I think I'd give it a whirl.
All right.
Take a look.
Are you serious?
No, I don't know.
I definitely don't know.
I definitely don't.
There's a nude.
That's one.
Let's see the nude.
That's one.
Is that a dick?
Oh, boy.
That's pretty big.
I know, my glasses.
What I can. Oh, I got mine here. Use mine. That's pretty big. Oh my glasses. Well, I got mine here use mine. That's pretty
That's big can you see look out of the top?
You gotta realize that
I don't want that
No, I'm sorry Lauren Lauren Lauren. Yeah, is that considered a big dick like to I don't know yes you do
That's a big dick
Sure, oh shit yeah
I'm a bad angel
I didn't see the extra piece she got that extra piece on there hold on cheese. I mean come on, Sal. Sal look at me
I wouldn't kick her out of that freaking guy She got it extra piece on there hold on cheese. I mean come on. Sal. Sal look at me No, no, no, all right, so me and you're at a bar. Yeah, right in fucking Tampa. Oh
Yeah, we're a city we meet Oh, right, where is it? Yeah, where, where is it? We go to city.
We meet her.
Yeah.
We go back to her place.
We don't know shit.
We go back to her place.
You go, she wants, she wants, not to do it me, want you.
You go back in the room.
Yeah.
And you fucking make it out.
Yeah.
She started sucking that cock.
Yeah.
That big, guinea fucking statin island, fairy dick.
You know, you can hear me.
No, you can hear me. Right? And then she blew her ass out. Farry dick
Right And then I'll be sending her fucking big hog hitch a knee gap
I can't do it. I fucking you talking about I'm saying it straight dude. That's a problem
I can't do it. I have I have a friend that was in that situation. Yeah, and
Wally was getting the oral
Yeah, me too and then he paid her at the end
Every other night
While he was getting the oral he found out
He tells it he now and then he's just let he said he went ahead with it. Yeah, let her do it. Yeah, let her finish
Let it finish
Not even up for discussion
100% hang on guys, would you let it finish?
If you find out
And he is as after I'm a little hurt. I'm a little hurt. I'm a little hurt. I'm a little hurt. I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt.
I'm a little hurt. I'm a little hurt. I'm a little hurt. I'm a little hurt. I'm a little hurt. He hasn't peed. He thinks he's gonna let the guys look at that
Yeah, that's gonna be a one-gun blast. I think this is very transphobic. I don't I don't I think you should let her Fuck it eight 90% of the room is letting me be in he's joking now. I can tell what is joking
What you would you would you would joke except for a letter who is being transphobic?
I'm not really can't beat it. You can't beat it.
Beat him up.
See, see, that's the-
Because when he's digging hard, I don't know her no more.
You gotta have the right pronouns.
I love how I'm gonna have to solve this.
Bobby, Bobby, Bobby, Bobby, just look at me like,
I'm gonna have to have some ruling on this son.
Where do you stand on trans women?
You're a trans woman. I mean, what do you mean what do you stand on trans women? Oh, you're a trans woman.
I mean, what do you mean what do I stand on?
Is this, would you be attracted to that?
No, no, right?
Are you gay for real?
Straight out for real.
That's for real.
That was a little confusing way to put it.
Yeah, that's it.
You're gay, you like that?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's what I'm gay.
That's it.
But see, no, no, no, see, that's why I don't talk about it in my act. Oh, I
Not even that not even yeah, yeah, not even that right see I think
Homophobic people would they not scare the gay people is just like yeah, I just found
To get it right it doesn't affect me
Can I just when they overly like?
No, that's what but that's what the industry
Let it stop one
That's what you want to get out as you guys are having this conversation. I'm sitting in rubbing the head
I'm sitting on
I
Have two to three jokes about it in my act and every there's a lot of other gay comedians who every joke is I'm gay
Right, so you can't is and And that's the thing, that's why people say,
like, you know, like, you're a comic person first.
I agree with that.
I agree with that.
You got it.
I don't know if you want to give a shit if you're talking about.
But if you're not, as a comic,
as a comic, you're a, you're a, you're a, you're a,
you're a, if all I do is say, I'm fat on stage
for how, if you would get tired of it.
The way I look at it is if these gay guys
that all of me talk about their sexuality
if they were not born gay they'd be accountants.
So I can't respect.
If your own like comic sensibility comes from your sexuality
I don't personally think you're that funny.
Bitch.
I agree with that personally.
You need a bitch but bitch.
My dad about females by the way.
My dad said to me years ago,
I didn't even, like he was a little kid and he just wanted some,
my dad thought was progressive, like I wish we were in the Greenwich Village and he
would go, son, you see that? I said, yeah, he goes, that's what they call a shim.
That's what I thought, oh, she, she, you know, he's like, that's what they call a shi-hi
per hen. You know, the trans people I you know, I wish everyone the best I do too man
I I I think we're living it. I mean, I know it's a fucked up time in a lot of ways
But I think we're living in a great time too because I mean they have
Watch the fucking Lenin. What the fuck you doing? Do that fucking later
Fucking doing your stupid taking over your fuck cock block in the show? What you phone down?
Nobody knew except for you you bet you're on a fucking five camera.
I don't have no camera on me.
Can I get you?
You're one player in it but not another.
Leave me.
Fuck it all the cameras are kind of on you.
Fuck.
Damn, say I don't know what's going on.
He was fucking.
No, no, no, no.
You got a laugh.
He's a better omg shot. He was that one. No, no, no, no. You got a lie. You did that on my gusha.
Even in like the flash or the arrow, the flash, the fucking show, the flash, the top
cop, what's his name, the fucking, what the top cop, who's the guy?
Whatever, the main guy is fucking gay
Like the lieutenant is fucking gay
Did you what I said no cuz you two fucks
The top cop in New York City's gay
Pop quizzes call the conversation that you're not listening to you fat fuck Well I fucking died I don't need that dumb You have a fucking pop quiz on the pop quiz I'm gonna tell you all my phone and all my stuff
Pop quiz is called a conversation that you're not listening to
You fat fuck
You fat dude
And I just took a jake foot sweat
That's why I can say it without people fucking condemning me
I'm gonna fucking
On the um...
Social media platforms
Listen, what I'm saying is that they're fucking...
They have the lieutenant in the show
Oh in the show
Is usually alpha male fucking asshole. Which show is the flash on Netflix, which is a hit show. Oh, yeah is gay
And he hasn't you mean their little no flash
That's pretty fucking epic
Children's fucking comic book
He's from Virginia The flash is from Virginia. He's a children's fucking comic book. He's from Virginia. The Flash is from Virginia.
He's from Norfolk.
What?
The Flash, the Do The Place of Flash.
Him and the Supergirl, they're from Virginia.
Norfolk.
That means nothing.
Oh, it means something to me.
No, we're talking about.
You know what?
Fuck this podcast.
I'm don't want you guys.
You fucking, now you can just drink.
We're ending it.
Thank you so much.
Thank you. Don't fuck yourself, Tony. I'm coming back drink. We're ending it. Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you.
Don't fucking self-towing.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back.
I'm coming back. I'm coming back. I'm coming back. I'm coming back. I'm really excited for the force of boring. My garage wasn't in the room for this one.
Yeah, but it was real.
They were like, yeah, flash comic books.
Anyways, we're men, drinking, fucking whiskey.
What are you talking about?
You have fucking half a queen.
All right, I'm kidding.
You can come back on any time you want.
Just nod on Tuesdays. No, no, hot, hot of the fucking joke you asked.
We're just like, you, no man, I'm gonna go.
What can I say?
Do it, do it.
Oh man.
Sorry, I thought you were talking about that.
You can feed that audio in your throat?
No.
What's the top?
Let's see how it's alive.
And actually, I just just taste it something. Something. Yeah. See, like fucking Lewis Gomez fingers. All right guys, let's go around the room.
We'll start with StarVarose. What do you got, buddy? I just found me on Instagram. Oh,
my podcast, Come Town. Listen and subscribe. I mean, you know, I knew a podcast. You just
negated everything. I know, I know, I know a podcast you just negated everything
I know I'm not a little something about having a platform guys on Uncomtown
being a bone do a podcast check it out please subscribe and also follow me on Instagram of course at
Stavvy baby STA
His Instagram was one of my favorite things in the world and when I miss it I get very depressed Yeah, good. His Instagram is one of my favorite things in the world. And when I miss it, I get very depressed. Did you block me?
No, I never see the fuck.
It's a erotic Instagram.
It's a real, yeah, yeah.
I'm naked the whole way, yeah, yeah.
I've had a couple donuts, yeah.
Yeah, I was just looking at your white hair.
Shit, let no, no.
Whoa, why? How do you run it, please? shit. Let no white. How do you let it please?
I let it let it what do you follow my
What do you got be charged everything?
I'm blessed to be here. I got my own thank you a checklist
I got I just started my own podcast. I'm one episode in what's your call crazy talk
Well, in a new host of calls to about Willie, let us join you. I will ever get everybody on it
Hell yeah, I'm waiting to find out if I sold a short of MTV
so you know just pray for me on that.
You know we're going to sitcom.
I'm just praying.
You know, just trying to, you know, stay alive.
You know I don't drive cars.
23.
Oh my God that's amazing.
No that's nice.
What's amazing?
That he has that much going on at 23.
You know what I was doing nothing.
Yeah because you're a fucking a guinea from Stan Island
I'm having a fucking really good little job. I'm only having a fucking from Virginia
You think I'm cute. Yeah, I think you're cute. I appreciate that. What about you Lauren you think I'm cute? Oh, so cute
You could follow me on Twitter Instagram Leonard oots L. E. O. N. A. R. D. O. U. Z. T. S S Facebook every time my fans have I threw that name
said. 10 years you're going to be like you're you got that going on a
23. It's crazy. How old are you, Sal? I'm gonna be 40 in November, man. Damn,
my mom will 45. I'm 23 so I'm so old enough to be a dad
That's not really but you think he's gonna be around at 40
I lost 30 pounds fuck you
Nobody wants a skinny oots
Fucking used to be fat face No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm probably not gonna see you go but
But Sal will
I love when he's losing weight eating a bag of chocolate He just cut two bags down to one
He just cut two bags down to one head. Oh shit, he's winded for that.
With ACR, he's fucking sweating.
ACR the way over there.
I have a hole.
You turn it on his face.
Sal, what else you got buddy?
I'm at Sal Volcano on Twitter.
What's your last name?
I'm Adi Zell.
Volcano.
Volcano, is that Italian?
Yeah, that's Italian.
My dad's 100% Italian and
I'll be at San Diego we'll be at San Diego Comic Con this year again for the whole week
Wow, we're doing a bunch of stuff there. You love that don't you? It's cool. It's really cool man
They really come out for us and that's I got a tour we got a tour in October the whole month of October
And that's that with the guys the 10 points. Now all you guys know what you're here
Yeah, we all go we get on the bus a few times a year.
And we just banging out because we had to film.
So we go on the bus as much as we can.
And I'm glad you're doing that.
Thanks.
I actually started solo stuff recently.
So I know all you guys and I like I'm just
getting into this now.
I mean, I was in a long time ago, but so I do solo stuff too.
But that's it.
I don't know.
Oh, we got to exchange information.
Yeah.
Yeah, but congratulations to both of you.
Seriously, this business is a motherfucker.
And to have you get going on, man.
Why do you say that?
You're a good guy.
Look, I'm this kid's biggest fan.
I love my father.
Yeah.
I hope nothing.
This kid's going to be a fucking pervert.
He's going to be a good guy.
Seriously, he's going to be a writer for somebody big someday.
I wanna dick.
I just want that to be a word.
I thought you were writing it to text you.
I didn't even take that as a joke.
I was like, oh, right.
So cool.
You know, like it's weird, I poured it.
You see, man?
I was like, he is.
Oh my god.
But I understand the business.
I'm like, you got a packet I can see?
I'm selling this stuff right now.
I can use it from my study. Mm-hmm. Alright, man. like, you got a packet I can see? I'm selling this show right now, I can use somebody.
Hi, man, what do you got, buddy?
You know, I just started working at Casper.com.
I'm very excited about everything happening.
I just, I have a new, I have a new part,
we just, you know, I do this email me.
I just started a new podcast on gas digital, which is Gomez, Louis Gomez's in network and it's called Tim Dylan is going to hell the first episode was tonight
It's seven. Why don't you go to right? Yes, it's gonna be Tuesday's it's seven. How would you do it here? I know I mean
I just saw a great new network. It's a calm little gas digital. Well, no, what's your show called Tim Dylan is going to help you should
Fucking do you could just take this studio? Oh, wow this is a little awkward and weird, but it's a gas tigil. They're a great network
Over here. No one else mentioned there
I'm not bringing
Do all your pockets? First of all, I'm not bringing come town.
I like that.
And you shoot with those?
What about crazy talk?
Yes, of course I do.
I do anything, yeah.
What about crazy talk?
Crazy talk, yeah, I do crazy talk.
I would park you in the water.
What's your score?
What's it you?
It's pretty popular.
I'd love to have you all fucking on.
I am so serious.
You can't smoke a hit okay.
No.
No.
I will never mind.
All right, what else you got?
I mean, that's a big package.
You know, you see me, the stand,
Caroline's all over the place.
And, you know, just at Tim J. Dillon on Twitter.
And Tim Dillon on Facebook.
Super funny.
Super fun.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Jeff, you always fucking kill.
I appreciate your thanks, buddy.
First time working with him.
We had a great time.
We had a great time on Long Island. Every town was that was we were
Brokage bell. Merry super funny. I had a good box on that night. I forgot this name. Forget the fucking dude
I was fucking bees. Yeah, sounds like a conversation after the show
I'm wrapping up okay, let's I know if you do your own show, but do it by yourself
What do you got fucking German schnitzel?
We caught him a snitch Do it by yourself. Okay. What do you got fucking German schnitzel?
What do you got? He's like white he's like white fucking shorts kids do you summer reading exactly if you're listening
At Bobo was gay on Twitter
A parody account of a character who hasn't been on ONA years yet
Good time. Yeah, excellent. We got we got we have magnets and shit We got posters you guys want some of that shit out there. I will sign every new sign it. What do you got buddy?
At Gileabats besides a fucking weird briefcase
Are you going to a ransom meetup after this?
Yeah, what do you have in there?
I always carry my unmarked double.
Yeah, I have my chef knives in there.
I guarantee you got some produce in it, oh.
What do you got in the bag?
Do you have food in the bag?
There's got to be snacks.
There's a bolion kind of in there.
All right, I got some form of produce. Do, there's gotta be snacks. It's the bollion dynamite in there. All right, all right.
We got some form of produce.
Do you have snacks?
No snacks.
There's not one fucking snack. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Good good time. I don't know the man. Thanks coming on Thank you. What do you got T-Poo? I got 50 Pokemon
Where are you playing? Yeah, I'm on it. You're playing. You think he's nice
I'm not really loving them up. I'm just collecting because yet like pumps a money into it to level him up
So I'm just going to
He gonna catch all of them first then ten years or nine. They're a Pokemon in here right now. Yeah snorelax right here
I know it was a good one. We were like, oh!
But I got nervous like I was going to hit him.
He was fat laks.
Twitter Instagram are too deep and that's right.
You got any shows coming up?
Yeah, I'm around. I'm just doing some stuff.
Are you a comic, too?
Yes, I am.
Oh, good.
Yeah, he's actually, he's getting funny, dude.
I believe so, yeah.
I mean, that tape, he sent me a tape.
It was really good, man.
And Scopo, too, has been fucking, last time, I mean,
you're killing it, too.
It makes me happy, you guys are fucking...
Scopo went to Boston with a great time he was really good my
rap Boston would now we were some see a Davis Square theater we
do theaters Bobby
I grew up in Medford right next to David Square. Let's not call it a fucking theater. Let's call it a
wonder man. Let's call it a
fucking theater. Let's call it a
room. Yeah, my room makes me very
highly a chrysanthemum. I ain't seen chrysan
a long time. You know, like, you
chryscobo killing it. I know.
Yeah, he's doing great, man. I don't know
who fucking wrote whatever he's doing
now, but I got a good one. Uh huh.
All the more. What do you got besides
fucking B cups? Oh,
they changed.
Well, I'm going to fucking say, she watched my beautiful
diva all week.
I did.
She's such a darling.
And then she's-
I've been friends with Lauren for a while.
I, what?
Yeah.
I met her before anyone here.
Yeah.
What are you talking about?
For a year or something.
You fucking know him?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I didn't know you fucking know.
I don't know where you think I'm on the podcast. You got him on. Yeah, I didn't know you fuck you
You got him on the show I got him on the show. I met him at the fucking Skank fast
I knew they knew each other
Come on the show and I was like sure but I didn't I need to know each other because the whole podcast dancing shit to a joke
Have you guys ever hooked up? No.
That's what they're supposed to say.
No.
I know she's fucking lying because she was saying it.
No.
No.
No.
No.
With the man with the multi-millionaire at the table.
No.
Of course I've never hooked up with him.
I've launched your fucking, that's your dream, right?
Well, I got a lot of dreams.
You got a, you got a fat black young one. you got a fat black young one you got a fat black young dream sure she doesn't bloody I'm sorry sure
I'm a fact sure it's good enough for me yeah would you would you think you would
go with Lauren you I'm talking yeah
okay you put some times something not What's ever answers? I look at you for keep you
Can you look at her and say can you cook? I'm alright
Cuz my smoke I'm gonna get that I clean. I'm a really good cleaner
Oh, yeah, I'm a bag of chocolate
Very clean Italian family. Do you like the real bellies at night? I don't really know about that
Look if you fucking me a fucking man. Okay,
if you're going to chop you know, she's out of your dog all week. I don't know. You answered
that for real. I'm not sure if I like to rub belly.
Yeah. I'm very positive. Would you be I just sleeping with your hand on my stomach? Sure.
Sure. Let's put it this way. She was a cop and she pulled you over. She'd show you.
I'm kidding. She's a tiny girl from Jersey
She's banging every she's banging fairy sal over here
All right, let me read your dates. I read my dates. All right. I want to make an announcement real quick
I got a fucking huge tour coming up
my dates. I want to make an announcement real quick. I got a fucking huge tour coming up. We're, uh, we're, uh, it's coming out this week. Finalizing dates, it's rock clubs,
it's theaters, it's regular clubs. Um, it's going to be, it's, I'm going to be hustling
like the old days. I'm, I'm going to be going to one place, driving to the next place,
going to the next place, driving to the next place.
I'm going to be hustling from a rock club to a theater to a regular club doing one
nighters to weekends.
It's going to be pretty crazy.
We're putting this tour together.
It's the first time I've ever done a legitimate tour that my management and my agent put together.
I'm very excited about it.
It's going to be fun and a lot of cool joints.
So when it does go out, buy the fucking tickets.
Please.
I don't wanna fucking, don't wait to that week.
I will just fuck you.
Sorry, buy the tickets.
So it's coming up this week.
I'm very excited to announce it.
So look out for that this week.
By this time this show comes out, it'll already be out. So what do we got? What's going on? All right. So July 21st,
22nd, you'll be up punchline Philadelphia and the 23rd. That's this week. This
show comes out this week, right? Yeah. This one. This Sunday night. Yep. I know
one. This is fucking ass of reflux. just when I look at your face and your hair.
Um.
Ha ha ha ha.
It was Friday Saturday Sunday.
Friday Saturday Sunday.
Is that correct? Yes.
The 21st, the 22nd, 23rd.
I'm going to be at the brand new fucking punchline.
If you don't know the punchline, San Francisco.
Tell me. It's one of my favorite clubs in the fucking country.
You get tickets on box.com.
You know.
You get tickets.
That was serious.
You don't fuck a brand new.
That's a brand new club.
It's an amazing club and it's in fucking Philly.
I've been in Philly in two years.
So I'm excited.
If you listen to now, you front Philly,
go spread the word, retweet the shit,
share it like it, repost it.
If you listen to it today, go get your tickets.
Go to my website, go to PhillyPunchline.com
and buy your tickets, tell a friend, bring everybody,
let's sell this fucking place out.
Friday, Saturday and Sunday,
21st, 22nd, 23rd, Ph philly punchline it's a brand new club
I'm very excited what else uh september 22nd 23rd 24th you'll be in left Boston
left ball really when yep 22nd 23rd
oh yeah I'm taking the fucking month of august off month of fuck uh that's what comics
that's gonna be good for all that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that I'm taking them to the next six months off, like nah, I'm a fucker, you just ain't got no dates.
Not you one, Jim.
Nah, I'm a fucker, damn, shut the fuck up.
Fucking sing song, you horsh**.
I'm taking the month of, I told my fucking manager last year, I go, I want, because what happens
is you work in August and you know what's cell?
Because everybody's fucking away. And then I'm working these clubs
that I usually sell grade in,
in like, you know, September, October, November,
January, February, March.
And all of a sudden, they put me in there
in August the last couple of weeks.
Nobody's, who the fuck is leaving the vacation?
I'm off the full month of August.
Yeah.
Do you wish you get dinner and have some last and go? I'm doing barbecues also. Yeah, do you wish you get get dinner and have some last and I'm doing I'm doing barbecues
All set. Yeah, I'll bring you I get you know, yeah, well fuck you because you just told me that I'm a fucking piece of shit
That I didn't get booked so you don't get the common dog is comics. I didn't say I didn't say you all right you come that
So yeah, we are
Look at me. We're going to be chocolate. We're going to be chocolate. We're going to be chocolate.
You're going to be doing a new candy every week.
Is it going to rain?
We're going to be there.
We're going to be there.
We're going to call the UTS effect.
It's a new candy every week.
Just in case.
No.
Yeah, the whole month I said I want the month of August off.
So I'm doing two gigs.
I'm going to the TSAs for the show, which is awesome.
Fun time out in California for a section of drugs and rock and roll. And then I'm doing
one fucking crazy gig that's gonna suck in Tampa. But it's crazy. It's crazy. It's the
radio gig. Are you doing it? Is it August 12th? I don't know, maybe. I'm doing some
August 12th. It was like, uh, laugh now or something. I don't know.
Who you with?
I don't know.
I'm with Matt Frost.
I'm with Frost.
Oh, I know, bro.
We do it.
I said, this is a theater.
I'm doing it with Joe Koy.
Yes!
Yes!
It's good, it's good, buddy.
It's good, buddy.
I was like, oh, yeah, go ahead, dude.
Well, I told him, I told him I go do it.
I'm not fucking doing, fuck nothing in art. Then he called me and my god, I go do it. I'm not fucking doing fuck nothing at all that he called me
I'll do that
He called me and I'm like thank you Jesus
I just wrote yes
Next makes me mad but yeah, so that's gonna be for them. We're doing it together. Yeah, awesome dude. That's gonna be fun
and
That's about it sex and drugs and rock and roll on Thursday night on FX.
Make sure you watch it.
If you're a fan of mine, even, look, just watch a show.
Hit the record button for the season.
And check it out. This season's amazing.
It gets better and better every week.
This week, we actually stopped breaking
into the Hamilton type of thing.
Me and me and rehab put on a it's called feasts
it's about the that's a takeoff on Hamilton about the potato famine in Ireland
and it's a rap Campbell Scott winds up rapping fucking hilarious so watch that
what else and subscribe you fucks yeah 1999 I don't remember your piece hill yourself
To my podcast
Talking about yeah, that gas
Shout out to gas digital because they're great guys
I'm repeating
All right, sorry everyone
Subscribe to you know what you know, do we do we have any chat chatter at all?
Andrew Jackson says fat guys matter
I mean I had stuff cut up from the discussion about the black you know the cops and blacks
I don't know if the right time for most of it
Just read one of it. One.
I told you, I said the one good one.
Read one.
Read one.
Oh, I got one.
No, first of all, every time you do it, and I tell you to do it, it wants it to work in my favor.
All right.
All right.
Someone asked if Bobby was a Pokemon, what would it be?
And someone said instead of Pikachu, he would be eat it chew eat and chew
Read another one she was in back watch this read another one piece of shit
Dyson says doesn't Tyson says is Lauren going out with Dante?
Oh no no
No, I just learned
Lauren is Lauren
What's the next word is Lauren single? Yes, are you fucking Dayton Dante? I am not dating Dante
You gotta fuck Dante. No, I'm not fucking don't hey. Why would you do that? Why would you do that now? Why would you say that?
Dante Dante was giving me relationship advice don't I love
We could practice Dante's relationship
I don't want to be the one we can practice in a fucking let's say that's not happening. Oh, it's why why because it's not happening
I'm gonna be famous real soon
I hope your career and I'm a nice guy
Hope it all falls now. I'm not a asshole. I'm gonna
I'm editing stuff out in here to make your career fall
I'm a treat you like a queen you're not treating anybody like a queen
First of all, all right business yummy guys. I saw that we're gonna be famous that just fucking Peter'd out
Okay, trust me the odds are it's not gonna happen. Thanks Bob
I've already made it father and I expected so everything
You gotta go through him to get to me. I'm a very nice. What do you mean?
Well, I do when she was your daughter you want to be later?
I
Go on out of the table right at the top
The top you
Daydra because first of all you don't listen. No, it's not because you're black
That's the fifth thing
I love you guys thanks for coming on the show you guys are awesome. I see you guys. Thanks for coming on the show. You guys are awesome. I'll see you guys later. You know what?
You've been listening to YKWD podcast
Thanks for listening
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