Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Victory Lobster
Episode Date: March 6, 2017This week on YKWD: Bobby's out of town, but we have a hilarious episode hosted by Mike Brown and Brandon Collins (both from the Comedy Outliers Podcast). Guests: Jon Laster, Sydnee Washington, and Gor...don Baker Bone. On this super last-minute Black History Month commemoration, we devote some time to all things 'hood. Things are kept real, "fo sho". Plus, a hilarious call in from Bobby Kelly! Watch / Listen and enjoy! www.RiotCast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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You're listening to Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude on the Riotcast Network, Riotcast.com.
Hey, this is Kathy from the Strickly Anonymous Podcast where you get to listen into the
secret lives of total strangers.
Real people call into my show when I talk to them about the real things that they do behind
people's backs.
And most of the time it has to do with SEX,
so it's pretty interesting.
Check us out on Ryakass Network.
Hi, this is Kristi Chelo, and I am so fucking excited,
because I have a new podcast coming out on Ryakass.
It's called Talking Funny with Christie,
and I talk to my favorite comics about all things comedy.
So you should listen at Riotcast.com or on iTunes
and follow us on social media at TFWC Podcast.
Or you can just die in a fire. Bye. Welcome to the funniest podcast on the planet Earth.
This is gonna be a clush to fire.
This podcast has no rules.
Look at the mic asshole.
I'm sure I've already said should I regret?
Can I get a mic?
No, what the fuck?
That was trying to keep it like a comic head.
I have a bunch of guys on.
It's just us sitting down and he happens.
Sometimes it's hilarious, sometimes it's 10 no topics, no directions.
I love doing it.
Way both sides of the coin.
That's how in a house does you love a pot of hot water.
I don't want to do anything.
My podcast is popular enough where I might affect somebody's life.
You never know.
To Robert Kelly, so you know what to podcast on lightcast.com
Yeah, yeah, we got Bobby out of here bees
We got Bobby out of here be welcome to you know what do podcast be like history month edition Yeah coming out of March. That's right after black history month
It's your guest host Mike Brown and Brandon Collins.
Hey, what's up, guys?
Well, you listen to that intro,
this one feels a lot longer when you're actually
here in the studio.
Yeah, because you're waiting for the thing to start.
It's like five minutes.
Yeah, I thought he was going,
like I was going to have like some hip hop or something.
It's a good thing.
No, we put very little thought into this.
Okay, today.
Yeah, I was like,
Jay was busy, okay, well,
I can make a whole new theme song just for one, the one time we had Black guys here. Okay, today. Yeah. I was like, Jay was busy. Okay. Well,
we're gonna make a whole new theme song just for one,
the one time we have black guys here.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The one time.
Yeah.
It's true.
I mean, it's been about a year.
Oh man.
I,
I,
I really like to expose the white comic world.
Yeah.
A little bit.
You know, we got,
It's like,
Wait, it does look like it's supposed to be.
I'm a chef.
This is the most diversity. Oh yeah., that will ever be has few episodes have been
Lily white
It makes you only I get weird about that
You don't think I feel like I'm weird about that. I'm the only minority here
Most of the time they keep shitting all you man. Yeah, you poop poo and stuff. It's not so bad
It's your fault. I'm not so bad. I'm asking for it
I started by saying hey my name's deep.. It's your fault. I'm not so bad. I'm asking for it. I started by saying hey, my name's Deepu. So
That's your name. Yeah, hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on. Time out time out time out. I know time out. I know
Time out. Let me let me moderate this. Please look, I've been just talking about names people hearing a lot of voices
Yeah, there's too many black people in here. The listeners have no clue. What's going on?
Mm-hmm
The guests are looking like what the fuck is happening. They own accounts like Wise and Bobby here.
So let's just figure some things out.
My name is Mike Brown.
I got Brandon Collins.
Hey, what's up?
We do a comedy outliers podcast.
We've been on the show many times,
favorite guests, accordingly, or whatever.
I got Lauren Coober right here next to me.
How are you doing, Boo?
How's your day?
Thanks for guest hosting.
I'm really excited.
Oh, well, thanks for letting me be here.
Yeah.
Yeah. Really focused. Now look home. Like I'm Michael Scream Oh, well, thanks. Thanks for letting me be. Yeah. Yeah.
Really focused.
Yeah.
Now look, come.
Like I'm not gonna scream with you.
I'm just really glad to hear.
Yo, yo, yo.
What's going on?
Like, yo, yo, yo.
I like what he's doing.
No, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm so behind oh shit. That's why
Very funny comedian I have Sydney Washington over here
Hey, so nice got some titties over here.
Yeah, it got a little bit slow.
Yeah, yeah, you said.
I mean, Gordon got some titties over there.
Yes, Gordon got titties.
I've been going through all that titties, man.
Hey, man.
Can y'all not talk over?
I've talked to each other all the time.
This much?
Can we just talk about Tittie Talk?
This is Tittie Talks, actually.
Yeah, but people can't hear the tittie talk.
They want to hear the tittie talk.
You're like, yeah, titties, titties, titties, titties.
Gordon got titties.
That's the last time with Tittie Talked, they want to hear the titty talk you're like yeah, it's it is it is it is Gordon got it is it got it
That's the last time a titty talk they want to hear Gordon's got it
You have not listened to this podcast have you got it?
They talk about dick size on this shit
That one is like to P9 right behind you. I say I didn't even look back at like history in my episode
We don't do that. Can we get you a shirt? This is Gordon Gattitties.
Yeah, dude.
I'll get my mom would love that shirt.
Yeah.
And that is Gordon Baker bone from Jersey.
Hey, what's going on, Connor?
Newark.
Newark.
New Jersey.
It's a total difference.
Newark is technically Jersey, but they don't claim us.
No.
I would like to say, ungentrifiable New Jersey. Oh, yeah. We going down
Swing and they put the whole foods out there. The crimson bloods is like, yeah, we're going to eat organic dog and like no, no.
No, you also got crack chicken over there. Yeah, we call it crack chicken.
Crown chicken and
Bass and chicken, but they call it crack. Oh, crown chicken. Oh, no, it's ambassador where Well, I was at East Orange. He's throwing. It's hasn't bastard Then you got Lincoln and fried then you got Kennedy fried dangers wrong Kennedy fried chicken. Yeah, it's just named after presidents
Yep fried chicken. I thought you know, it's a good spot. If it's not any other president is not good
Fried chicken. Would that be good? I mean
I just have poison
Bread and wait Gordon. I was on bulletproof over there. Yes, okay, you can't like they put a TD bank downtown north and
TD's thing is we don't have any glass and they got robbed like I'm like hey
It's Toronto Dominican they don't have that many black people where they started yeah, yeah started iron Toronto There's like yeah, we don't want to know glass and nothing. It's really Toronto Dominican. That's what's
Toronto deposit a thing. No, it's the Kim breath really can you look at look at up right?
This sounds like a black fact. That is just incorrect
That's wrong TD bank bank. Let's see.
Toronto dominion.
I'll make the positive.
That's why I said Toronto deposits.
I don't even know if there's a
Dominicans in Toronto.
You're like,
you're like,
you're like,
you're like,
you're like,
you're like,
you're like,
you're like,
you're like, you're like, you're like with such boys like he was really like no, it's Toronto
That's a place from Toronto to the Jamaica. That's a pretty cheap flight from
Brandi got them out facts
He can that's from project and that's what he doing here
Shout out we want to look at the chair over here to guess give the guests to Mike's I'll wait what you name introduce yourselves
What's happening? I'm Aaron. What's up Aaron's my girlfriend Blair. Okay?
Blair in Blair.
Hey B from Orlando today for this.
Oh
That's just this right?
Are you happy to see all these guys?
Yeah, I mean last thing they expect.
Like these people talk I mean they drove a while
Kind of ambushed by the blackness.
They didn't know.
Bobby didn't tell you to sneak, man.
Man, morning.
Yeah, so where you guys coming from?
Orlando. Orlando.
What you guys doing up here in New York?
Guys are three year anniversary.
Oh, great.
Oh, great.
Pop it up.
People listening and clapping in that bright end.
Yeah.
Three years.
Three years. How'd you guys meet let's get into
oh we met at a bar show like our friends got knocked out like
Ryan from this is really classy yeah wow I'm sure the love
yeah absolutely that's my love right there
we don't have that in a black girl I walked up to him and accused him of being a cholo
Mexican ganks is this that's how drunk she was yeah, I don't even know if there's like a
Cuz he has a beard for those listen. Yeah, you could have a red beard. He could be a little. Yeah, you don't look cholo Yeah, I'm just saying. Yeah, I appreciate it. I try to help his eyebrows are too thick
I'm just saying. Yeah, I appreciate it.
I'm trying to help you.
His eyebrows are too thick, he's.
My eyebrows, if you want to be a total...
I just like how his love started.
Get out of my country, chill!
I'm a American!
Hey, what's your name?
I think I love his girl.
I love a political view.
Hey, that raises in Florida that they like the white people
and then the places the other white people
that are crazy.
Yeah, yeah, it's real.
They do things different down Florida, man. Y'all got walmartmart that sell bullets and shit. Yeah, man for real
Yeah, absolutely they have a sorry last time I said we're allowed they had a sign of walmart that said I don't touch the facts
I'm just saying before you say this you're gonna say yeah, they're not gonna so
I feel like I'm gonna be to go and be to go and polish it right quick
I'm this pause you right quick. I'm gonna spread, okay. Okay, okay. I'm just red.
You just red for like years.
I really did.
You're selling all this friends?
I was like, yeah, it's Ronald Dominican.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm fucking mad.
He's leaving the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the
men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in the men in men in the men in the men in men in the men in the men in men in the men in the men in the men in the men in March by now why people gonna be tired of this yeah, we should talk about life and every time hearing about black history. Well black shit. We just to talk black shit
this whole episode. Alright fine. Fuck it. Can we start? Yeah, go ahead start. George
Washington Carver was cast straighter. He had no nuts. Go.
Oh
What?
Huh?
Yeah.
So we're gonna take the reins back before that.
Yeah.
That's not bad. Yeah. That sound like that's that's the worst that a random fact that is a doubt as I can the fact
He's captured. Yeah, right who I think to do that over adopted them
What yeah, dude like books are you reading?
That's what they teach the schools George Washington
George Washington, God is nuts, Koeh, erotic. Yes! Turn the basics.
But I was listening and we got D. Poo looking on black time travel.
Is that what? That's this website?
That's the website.
And then an ad popped up and said like to travel black
Here Gregory I guess that's the owner of Washington Carpour He insisted that George Washington Carpour was stripped of his dignity in manhood when Carpour was a little boy
He was castrated by the man who owned him allegedly Carpour became a house servant and since he was going to spend the majority of his time in the house
His owner didn't want him to rape his daughter
Oh, man. Sorry
Why would you know that? Why would I know that? No, it's a point to know that I like looking up
Castration
They won't teach you but it makes sense. That's why he never got a bio pig. You can't open with that
Open wait first happens it loses it is nuts. Yeah, it open with that. You can't open like, first half of the Sim, lose it as nuts.
Then it's like, goes to black, it's like,
it's like little now.
Then next, cause, cover, and you're like,
damn, this dude's going to some shit.
Yeah, yeah.
It's like, you're just thinking about peanut butter
all the time.
Yeah.
It's in ready.
It's in.
Oh, that's ready enough.
When does he get to the peanut butter?
It's like, what's that carbon movie like?
It's like Moonlight, but movie like? It's like moonlight but without nut
Oh my god, it's a pretty fucking hard. I would like to see that biopic actually on lifetime
Did you all see that pretty spirit's lifetime movie? Oh, but I heard it was terrible
Yo, I thought they do Whitney wrong. I knew you was gonna bring up
I thought they do Whitney wrong. I know you was gonna bring up
You went to Britney's man, you just learned about George
Yeah, yeah, I'm a Britney that Britney
So kind of is all circum what's she made it black dudes? Yeah, she was fucking dude from her stop the art. Oh the last day for all to not she ain't different. Don't you don't you dare bring Lauren. Sorry. He's a king
He's been 18 forever
She's never dated anybody but Gordel. Why are you swapping?
Cuz I am hot. I wore two t-shirts and I am hot. I need to
I am hot I wore two t-shirts and I am hot. I need to I need to turn off ice that's the problem. Yes, you made me put in a red solo cup. Yeah, now you look sad
Yeah, no man, Sydney Trins you know my glass back
Yes, bring the after ever pretty Steve
I'm not gonna say I was fun, because I wasn't. Everything's just kind of this blur, you know?
Until you hit the wrong button.
It should've snuck away.
I want to be strong for my fans.
She got blonde.
As a black man, as a blonde, he had her white woman.
She looks just like Britney Spears. I thought it was Britney. I thought it was
Tracks were very terrible so they were very on brand with Britney
Those were CVS
Gluens
You know what time I got that big of a budget girl damn
They can't even get the rest of the music shit. They can only do so much.
Cindy, you asking for a shan pay on a,
on a high-tech budget and shit.
They're doing like parodies like touch me child again for you.
I just wanted to have better hair.
That's all.
Better hair in the lifetime channel movie.
Did you all fuck with Britney Spears going up?
Hell yeah, I want the fuck Britney Spears going up
You know, I mean why everybody get quick? Yeah, you can be on the
Song called I'm a slave and
Singing it so what do you buy for rap?
Yeah, yeah, I think that's you cheated on JT with no she cheated on Wayne Robinson
According to like that's a black man. No, that's a white dude. What's what my dance with Michael Jackson? You said Michael Jackson
Lesson later. Oh, you're right. Oh
You know what's fun about Wayne ross we're off some a dance show where he always have brothers win at the end
He'd be like yeah, that's cool. You won this week But remember this is my house and did he just start dancing and the cameras were fade out
So it was like can you just show them?
Are you sure?
Because that sounds very black
If you google Wade Robinson, you'll be very Wayne wait wait wait
I thought you said Ray Robinson and I was like that is a black that's like a black baseball Pencil right I feel like he also got castrated before he started
Images let me see what he was doing look like
I think it look really way
Yeah, oh
Tips white. I mean that's back with JT and everybody was doing that quick question. I even tried to do question Aaron
Aaron have you ever done for us? Can you explain for us the tips?
I
Got a picture. I was really hate yourself. Don't I?
I know it was embarrassing teen years in my life. Why though? I want it
I want to be like this character on a cartoon. I watched which character was white
Yeah, no the character was
This guy look at Dragon Ball Z Dragon Ball Z. Oh my god. That's what you want to be after you only the trunks
I only did the tips I do the whole thing. I think it's trunks right trunks all of them can turn blonde
That's literally the case
Wait was dragon ball Z
Asian yeah, it was a man. Yeah, that was no you're thinking about the movie that was all white That's literally the case. Was Dragon Ball Z Asian?
Yeah, it was an anime.
No, you're thinking about the movie, that was all white.
That's a white one.
Yeah, that's when my people got to it.
They made it all white.
But you can't answer shit.
You can't get nothing.
If they did a new edition, biopic, the movie.
There was not one person that Brad Pitt is.
Oh man, I learned about Dragon Ball Z from my friend.
Because his brother got locked up. He's writing them letters like,. Oh man, I learned about Dragon Ball Z from my friend
because his brother got locked up.
He's writing them letters like,
I need to check out Dragon Ball Z.
I need to check out Dragon Ball Z.
And I was like, man, I can't watch this.
We watching all the time, it opens up, it's hell,
it fights us off the shans.
Today practice the fights like we did at the time.
I don't know.
I don't know my boy, we gotta watch this.
My brother said his dope, so we just popped an end
This mom with a mama's okay, I'm gonna get through this
They touch a ball, baby. No, but I got dragon balls.
I think it's gonna go crazy. Oh, man.
Gordon, who are you?
Oh, I'm just a doughnut.
I haven't laughed this hard. It's so low.
I thought that was the present time.
Just watching dragon ball the whole time.
I never really felt what dragon ball though.
It's okay. It taps until like the inner angry teenager and everybody.
Yeah, I feel like.
Were you listening to like, did you go to listen to the song? go listen to park? Yeah, yeah, I'm really a lot of that
Is that what kind of music is that I'm going back to you in there's a lot of questions that I have like that are just like kind of white
Related because I'm going to like so he's a white expert
He's a white expert. All right. That's fine. I was floating
Yeah, yeah, this is why you drove in this is what we need I want you to go back to Orlando and spread the word
Yeah, this is why you drove in this is what we need I want you to go back to Orlando and spread the word
Yes, you are the ambassador. So what is that kind of Lincoln Park musical? Is that like angst music? Garbage I think garbage
Clap it up. Well, it's fine. Well, it's out here. Cholos. How old are you?
30 30 okay, so we all grew up around that time when I came up
Yeah, I was do you say it's garbage now or do you think of it's garbage back then?
I was I always thought I was too cool for that stuff
So what were you listening to batten? Just like slayer and oh shit?
You got a real that's the slayer beer now
You can catch me and of a substance. He don't some other shit. This is a part of bass is a fucking pussy
I'm taking blood out of these streets
Like fuck shy above songs, I'll make a real shit
I'm just
I'm sorry guys, this is what they used to say
We're going to shout out the LGBTQ
Yeah, yeah, what's up?
What's up fuck one?
That's hard quick.
That one's hard for me.
I'm doing my castration.
Yeah, I don't know.
He's trying to want to be a good guy.
He's crazy.
What the fuck?
Okay, okay, really best.
Let's take a break. Let's take a what we should oh, yeah
I want to talk about this. Um, y'all watch the Oscars. Yes. Yep. First of all
Did you did you watch good?
You have a TV this is the first time I did watch our Oscars. I have a TV
Stuck slow have a nice 42-inch
Oh, yeah, don't tell people do you have
Have a nice 42 inch Oh, don't tell the people do you have
Don't punch oh nine twenty four. I'll be damn play mad no twenty four inches wrong with you
No, you can't make fun of the rough man's dick size or his TV TV like that is like yeah
Yeah, I will wrap my rather girl be like, oh, you're dick small. I'm like, I cool your TV small. Why you got tell everybody?
You're not gonna get no holes
Hey, I'm looking for holes. I'm just looking for just you know some quality time maybe go to the park eat a burger
Some park and eat it what that you have the quality time going to apply to the burger before maybe go to the park eat a burger some parking eat it
Why you get the burgers at the park?
No real burger, that's all. Shit shit doesn't have bullets in it. Like shit.
What a broken glass.
Yeah.
It's sick rip.
I'm just gonna sat at cocaine.
I'm gonna have to sit there.
I'm gonna have to sit there.
I'm gonna have to sit there.
I'm gonna have to sit there.
I'm gonna have to sit there.
I'm gonna have to sit there.
I'm gonna have to sit there.
I'm gonna have to sit there.
I'm gonna have to sit there.
I'm gonna have to sit there.
I'm gonna have to sit there.
I'm gonna have to sit there. I'm gonna have to sit there. I'm gonna have to sit there. I'm gonna have to sit there. I'm gonna have gunpowder I get on yo yo yo
Hey yo yo what's good son what's good?
Those stars with shake-shack they put me on my shit
Yo these niggas gave me extra napkins
Well, I can't eat right fuck out of here
They make his mate racism. Oh my god. You know, Gordon was angry eating his burger,
looking around like these smarty,
bugle, bugles.
They can be better than me.
They better than me, man.
You're like, hey, yo, yo, they're missing
an important ingredient, poverty.
It's a priority with my brother.
I need struggle.
Struggle.
I come no one gave me my attitude, but I ordered.
Oh my God.
You know what I mean? Yeah, let me get a number one extra struggle, please. Yeah, yeah. Struggle I come no one gave me attitude when I ordered. Oh my god
Yeah, let me get a number one extra struggle, please yeah
Nothing made me happier than seeing corn working at a shake-shut
Cuz you just know that be his nightmare
Oh, man, that would be my nightmare. We're gonna shake-shack in my head. Look at I got a lemonade large You know
You would get fired right away. I hope so I do no way you would what you would walk in with like a du-rag and a long extra the village. It's gonna be 2000 away on the white all over it.
For all the white listeners of YKWD, we're doing this episode to
let you know you cannot wear du rags. Do not wear du rags.
Please do not wear du rags. Even M&M tried it didn't work.
Remember that? Yeah, he worked. Oh my god. Oh my, we gave M&M
so many passes. We did. I mean, he also had no Balmins
batten to do rag white people. Yeah
All Timberlake did do that all Timberlake did it when he do that he did it after the cornrows He did it when he had we was working with for real. Yep. He had frosted tips and cornrows at the same time like that
He was transition over and then a fucking fooboo. Oh, yeah
No, no, but no, we but we had to hear it was like the
Stocking cap it was a stocking cap it was a stocking cap. It wasn't a fish. You do right stockin
Yeah, get get in here John get in here John
Lasted just came in the building
Oh, yeah, we can clap it up for John
Let's have a good job in here
Don't listen to John last the very front comedian regulates the seller the host of that legendary
Billion dollars a comedy night situation. He's here for the the black edition of YKWD
And he's part of history as we're gonna be the last black people ever allowed on
Okay, look at this okay Bobby's to me. My ears are too loud.
Okay, look at this. Okay. Yeah, yeah. I want to go to one of my favorite moments of the Oscars.
Gary from Chicago. What they did?
Well, we see my dad called me. He was like, yo, you gotta turn on the Oscars right now. They got us in the Oscars I was like, what do you think my aunt? He said you turn it on on. You know Michael's little self-centered. He's like, I'm on the
Oscar. I'm Tom Travelling. I'm a Fiona Facebook page.
This is amazing. Black girl magic.
I can't do anything.
But they have to go ahead. How about those sunglasses, Jen? You don't need those. It starts all right. There we go. Isn't that nice?
Isn't she the sweetest?
There you go
Okay, great. Well, I mean that's better set us back. Yeah, so
So many. Yeah, well the problem is my man would have put his tongue away
He's just sticking his tongue out taking pictures. I'm like, yeah, you go shake halibur is and with that
It looked like the source awards just for a little bit. Do you see that? Yeah, but I did like the moment
He was Jimmy Kimmel was like to the woman like oh, who's your favorite actor and she looked at things like he's right there
Because you know, that's like how our moms at all do and everything like that. I probably do it
It's so I saw a helicopter. I'd be like my mom
Now that wig now with that wig yeah, listen listen
That was a fucking alright everybody don't worry about about how he bears hair. It's how he bury
You're not gonna just like worry about the air you gonna be a girl. What you do?
I'm sorry. Well how he bury had too many dudes step out on her so like I'm kind of
Listen cool on how she heard
Dear blame the the men on her wig
There she got stylized for that. Sit in the enough focus.
Now hold the main issue.
The task.
We got Holly Barry on the streets sad.
But all the autumn do's that left her did bring the stock
down a little.
Right?
Right.
It did.
Because it makes you think something's wrong with her.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no, said, please, why are you gonna be like, please talk ill shit right now. I'm like, why are you right now? How was Holly Berry stock right now?
Well, first of all, she took so many elves
with those dusty ass dude shoes,
which she's like,
Benay, what's that white guy's sister?
Yeah, he wore nothing but say.
Oh, the model that says all the racist shit now
about her and her daughter.
Yeah, like one.
Who?
Something is wrong with her because the people that say.
She like, she dated that white dude
and then she was with justice, right?
Who beat her and stuff
David justice
She's a Wesley who beat her up to what's he saying?
What's the set you said yeah, just to say what's different?
The whole fish a little different. It's a, it's a lot of anger for a fish.
But a slap is like,
Psh, it can do better.
Yeah.
A slap is like, like a machine restarting.
Like, Psh, it's okay. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no And that's back and on he had all of us dominion so He was doing well financially
And he was slapping his niggas not paying taxes that yeah, that's it. That's it
But justice said that he was taking the fall for Westie's life because they were under
They were what was taking the fall for Westie's life?
But David Justice says that he actually wasn't one beating Halle Berry. It was Westie's rights
He said but they wouldn't go public about them fucking so he got the pro like she was like on the press
She was she was she was saying that she was with a high profile person that had beat her and people thought that it was
David was saying but it was Wesley. It was beating it. Oh
Nobody knew right was real right. He was real like
Oh, they was keeping it on the low. No, they was keeping on a low. Oh my god. Well, she was like am I not my brother's keeper?
Keep that shit to myself
Oh, man, you're gonna watch new jack city for y'all eyes T versus Westie's nights what the craziest
She doesn't have any cousins like who's in her family?
She's got a good team somebody's not knocking one of them do at least no okay guys
I think I think the the wig was a play to try to get in the black movies now
You know stop it. No, no, because you see how I'm like moon like got the award
You know violet Davis got the fences and all like these super black movies like you know we black
We don't give a fuck black like hit like hidden figures we black we do math nigga like all these movies
And I think she had the the wig on the curly hair like yeah, I can do black movies to y'all
That was in black movie wig that was very rich Rachel dollars. You don't know how to do it
You know how to do it
Rachel dollars all did her hair
New reporter that she's like straight broke now who hell is all oh yeah what you gonna make money from she
getting a full black experience I was trying to avoid
notice I'm in tag with that in this mother fucker
Our
Yeah, she fucking she really is
You know who broke the story that's the fuck that part Fox news you got them right they did
See another black person on the payroll
She law of attraction that one what did she do before what she just working with? She was helping black people she was acting Puerto Rico. She was
Brayton here in her house
Great hair is very lucrative
She's braiding hair in her house. So, braiding hair is very lucrative.
But not for hook hair.
Braiding hair, braiding hair to black people
that's dog walking the white people.
Yeah.
That's a gun, yeah.
Right.
You know what I'm saying?
Like when white people are flat-roaked,
they're like, yeah, I walk dogs.
When black people are broke, they're like,
you need your hair done, girl.
Come over to the house
I can get black one get your shit right. That's black woman. That's black men. We be like walking dog
I got some gay cousins. I could braid your head man. Oh, yeah, yeah, I might braid my like what grew up in like cutting hair and shit
You grew up cutting hair? Yeah, my grandfather owned the barber shop up in Trenton and like we used to go there for the summer
We had to learn Oh
The line-ups are not good there so I I was the worst I was the worst at cutting hair and all my cousins like they should always give me like the crack as a cut
And I didn't even know crackheads needed
Fancy ass crackheads you got in there
I'm gonna get a
What type of fancy ass crockers you got in there? You know how to get your friend, man?
I'm gonna get an eight that's it, three of them.
I'm not shit at things.
Wait, wait, wait.
So what the hell are you fuck the fuck?
The scariest one is this one dude acts for the razor
and I was like, dude, I ain't proficient with the razor, bro.
Why do you proficient?
I can't, I can't, I can't really do your line up with the razor.
He's like, come on, I need to look nice.
I was like, all right, fuck it.
And I got nervous around the temple where I did
with that vanist and I was just like, ah, if he jumped and I cut him and he started bleeding, I was scared, alright, fuck it. And I got nervous around like the temple where I did what that van is. And I was just like, ah, he jumped and I cut him.
And he started bleeding.
I was scared as shit.
And he just bounced up there.
What the hell was that?
I was turning on Skype.
Jesus Christ, we didn't know what.
What the fuck was that?
I was walking the corner, throwing it.
Going to thought he came back.
I'm going to wait.
Oh god, he's here.
I live in computer's that, man. I'm back. I'm going it's here. I live in computer. I'm
hot. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you.
I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. I in a chair And they would just see me there and I'm chilling. I'm talking with everybody else and having a good time
They're like, yo, you got me and I'm like fuck yeah, I guess and they were hopping a chair and like listen
I don't know how to do this. I know how to do that. I can get you a number one all around all even
But he just he asked for it and I fucking I nicked him and he started bleeding. Oh man. He gave me five and he bounced
He paid you tape. That's yeah, it really nice and true
What was the worst hair thing you ever got done to you? I went to the Dominican's
to the Dominicans and I got you said I did
Dominicans just so much
It's a flat twist. You remember those words like they would twist your hair
I did that and they fucking pull down my edges is crazy. I went to school
Win on me ham all in the cafeteria question question and then that day Cindy the sad to be a comedian
Never again. There's four listeners and our white friends here. What are edges? What are edges? You see your hairline?
Oh that I'm covering up right now
It basically connects your hair to the rest of it like is bad. Okay. I just want people to know like supposedly
You know, this is like the black history episode. I want to just like bring it on me like Campbell she has no edges
What's not okay? I can't tell you what it is but I take words
You know she's still a great though Oh, yeah, she's still a great you pull her up. Yeah. Yeah
She's she's covering up the edges tell she was here not that long ago. She ain't covering up those ten wait Wait, she she was she was a seller. What was she to just here watching show? She can't be with Dave. Oh
Where you performing? Yeah, did you go hard? I was hosting did you go hard when you saw did you like over you just like no?
You know what man? I don't really get all that star struck not to mention me
They was they was I don't know I mean not for I mean there's some people I guess they're
Yeah, who would get you like you I got to get right
Star struck man. Yeah, like I got a chick. Oh man. That's a that's a good question. I know you know
No, how we think you know what maybe maybe a little bit you know, you know who I who's who I have a crush on that super corny
Who that this is gonna sound corny Taylor Swift
What's my man's name the ball players? What you want to do?
No, the ball ball.
Shout out to the elbow dude.
What's the deal about the video to Kanye Taylor?
Tiana Tiana Taylor.
Please bring her back home.
You're back home.
You're my shumper girl.
Yeah.
You're my shumper girl. There you go. What's the name of her? You're my shumper yeah, who's uh, yeah, my shoppers girl. There he is
Yeah, what's the name of her? I'm shumper. Yes. I think you know
You know what's he on a salad with him? I was heated and then I saw that dude. I was like I get it
I get it you hate it. You say I hated the basketball player cuz I was like who got this woman and that's almost alright
I understand John you back home. I'm so glad
Okay, thank you. You know who gave her her break right?
Hold on hold on wait, hold on wait, wait, sit down again. You know who gave her her break and music?
Oh, I thought you were for real. Oh, really?
For real put her on you. For real is God.
Lauren, if you made that the episode time you would be like a hundred million-blad people
For real is God. Wait, I thought it was uh, diddy. Nah, no. That was the first one. Get it like a first
Freddy's Freddy. He started missing. Yeah, thank you. Diddy put missing on. Oh, okay. that was the first one get it like a first for it. So he started missing Yee-e-e-e-e-e. Diddy put missing on okay? I thought missy was like locked up in a house with all the
Mother's saying yeah, I thought Timberlin put her on nah nah well they so they were like in a
Boo camp with the Joe to see dude. I think it was like Devon Tay and they was he was like beating them
down and shit to get him to be better. He was beating them down. He was beat. That's why they started holding on hold on wait. Hold on wait Joe to see his 90s
Jason Jojo were part Casey and Joe Joe
You know the school dance
They don't know Joe to see but they know Casey and Joe yeah, they know Casey's all my life was we all got rejected to that so yeah
I'm glad I get rejected. I never take all my life. I
Every day. I told my life. That's a read that's a rejection. Why did she repeat it? You see what I'm saying?
Joe to see Joe to see you like the hood boys to men. Yeah, right?
They literally were the hood boys. That was the hood version of boys.
Yeah, so you haven't my baby best start out like that.
Ever my baby you started song out like like you claim in the baby the first part of the song.
Actually, that shit is gangster, but I'm so Devonte was a part of a song that she does that she does gangster but um so
Devonte was a part of a jota cd. He was the d in it
Jokesy and so he had a group of young young
kids in it uh it was Timberland it was Missy Elliott it was uh I think genuine Alia
I think for Rell was in there too in that basement time and he would beat them down lock him in a basement
lock him in the basement beat him down and like play the song again
Do this again kind of like the joe Jackson
Oh, it is well down my you gotta explain that what that means
I love to how he bearing
I'm a smacks here now couple smacks here and there
And I was like no
Okay, I'm gonna baby in the back
You know what I mean?
So, and that's what happened.
But, but yeah, but when they, when they,
what were you talking about, you fucked me up
with that whole shit, man, I was doing so good.
Tiana Taylor?
Oh yeah, Tiana Taylor, okay.
So, she started with, damn she fine, you know.
Yeah.
Jesus.
The crazy thing about it is like, people didn't recognize
her fine until that video
You know what's crazy, though, man
The reason why I don't get star struck man is when you see these people in person you go oh damn
Yeah, you know, just a person. Yeah, when you see him in person is just always a let down
I I don't I can't think of a celebrity
I saw in person that I was like still banging who's your first let down and who like let you down
I was like, you know what fuck it
What is that I think in Minneapolis maybe when I saw Janet Jackson
Yeah, I've seen her here in the city
Well, she made them blow out all the candles at her table because they didn't want anybody know that she was there We're like bitch you Janet Jackson. We knew when you came in the building. I'm gonna can this at the table
There's like only, like that's so up now. What did you say?
Oh, get it some y'all!
No, she sat down at the table and then she made this blow out the candles.
She made this blow out the candles that was next to the table next to her as well.
But did she have to use her iPhone plus to see the menu?
I was saying. wasn't looking good.
When was this?
Was this Jemaine Depri?
It wasn't that she wasn't looking good.
When was it, too?
When was it?
Was it Jemaine Depri?
This was like six, seven years ago.
This was while, okay.
How did you like it?
No, maybe even ten twig, but I'm just saying that.
You know, you know, when you think and, but you know, when you think in, you know,
because in your mind, you got this picture like she's gonna be glowing or floating
We're
You see him and you like oh come on man. I got business bad
I mean John Lasse you got bitches better than Janet Jackson. Why you got to call him up? Let's get it real though.
I mean, I'm just saying,
I'm just saying,
when you see somebody in person like that,
there's a let down.
So after that, you kind of realize,
you probably shouldn't be getting all that hype.
Neil Long, I saw her in person.
She's no good.
No, she looks great.
Oh yeah, she's little though. She's small. That's fine. Yeah, I found that I saw Melissa Ford in real life and she's she's bad
But she's like super short if you know Melissa for that video video woman. Yes video. I like how you didn't say video ho
I'm not saying a hoe she ain't a hoe she let me bring this out
Video Vixen is what I like to say oh
Melissa Ford with the wife she was taking the train with me the six train
So I was like, oh, good job deep. Oh, no, you know our guests got to get train again so much. We took the six train together
She is would you talk hot? No
You made it sound like I was like we took the six train
Yeah, I'm sad though. Well you see my husband at the same time like that's gonna sad
Don't you see so much you think got money and you see them On the same trainers you like oh
Like Amy Shume on the training. I knew I could make it one day and this was like three years ago
I was like I can make it cuz she was on the train low key. I was like if Amy taking the train like I like that
That's how
I saw Terrence Howard on the train and he was trying to make sense a lot of
Hey, we was coming out of Philadelphia. I was like, hey, man, it's a guitar
He probably wasn't on the train like toner, but hey man, I got the show called Empire
Actually served him at my job about six years ago and he gave me his debit card
I was like sir you don't have no amics
Very big She said
Cindy I got a Debit car to my back
I got my watch call I thought I thought I made a little money this week
And and here she goes suit my shit down
No, you made it sound like it was food stamps
This is my
Like you need to put your pen
You got some little shit. There's nigga running around with the cheer.
I'm feeling some type of way about that.
Debit, you're fucking well, Fargo.
Debit car right now, John.
God damn.
You made a sound like a nigga wearing rollerblade or something.
Like a rollerblade.
John, do you have a wallet?
Yes, I do have a wallet.
Who's gonna lose Debit car in your pocket?
That's it. That's a loop De card in your pocket. That's it, just a loop debit card.
They gotta loose you, they gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you.
They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose. They gotta loose you. They gotta loose and discussed in the word devil he was like dev it like oh my god like you don't know what he was going through he's just got far off
a Iron Man chants a rough
Sean you it's okay that you have a good imagine if you were tarant powered and then you pass me this
gosh she swipes with disgust
oh yeah she was she was what type of
stupid oh my god you can not that man that man you was hoping for black women at one point
yes she goes oh true and she went money black one or horrible because when I was I just want to say
The beauty of money
Explorant by Brandon Collins do not reflect so the why can't you do all your boy my grand please
Well with this baby store all the black woman working at the store called each other on the microphone
Because fucking Dame dash came in and his car got rejected five times.
They call it all through the store like, yo, Dame Dash is out here in this street.
We're rejected.
We're getting a big talk on it shit on radio.
Okay, okay, okay, okay, we're pretty list of brothers.
He must have fell off fast because I noted that X used to work down at Halo.
At by the store.
No, no, no, no, it's not that far from here actually. X used to work down where at Halo at by the store or there no no on
On it's not that far from here actually
At this club called Halo, but I know that my fucking had the black card then
Black card, but you know the problem with the black cars they make you pay
Immediately yeah, yeah, so you can't
Damedash started Rockefeller records with Jay Z so he's supposed to have a lot of money
I know people I know you on the couch like who is Dame Dash and we're just going this is our world
I know to listen is out there like you lost it. But you know Jay-Z right? Yeah, no Jay-Z
Everybody knows Dame Dash, but they don't know how they know yeah, yeah
You ever seen Jay-Z's big Pippin video. He's the dude porn a champagne and doing the fist. That he bought it with his debit card. Thank you.
He bought it with a debit card.
That debit card.
Take my pin in.
Let me put my pin in and buy it for his champagne on his phone.
Take one of those champagne doll.
There he is right there.
It's named right there.
Yeah, it's named right there.
Is your Dame Dash your under the minimum?
Yeah.
People will be sniping. Dame. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
People will be as sniping.
Dame Dash needs a receipt.
I just knew she swiped that car just hoping that it said
decline.
Just please leave me.
Oh my god.
Let me stun on.
You know who's car guy at the client?
That was Rizapar.
Please, please.
I love these stories.
Maxwell.
No.
Oh, no.
No.
No.
This woman working in, huh?
I know.
I can't just put a listeners out there.
Maxwell's are
Just if you want to know okay, not Maxwell what did he do saying his way out of it
Glad you pay you
I'm glad you paid you they were drink on Monday This brother this one of his friends pay for it is like what can a brother?
Step who step then yeah, no wait
I've got the client my blood people get that reference
The best man is a movie in black culture. It's an amazing movie
Fucking amazing movie
Black movie
It had like a plot and everything is so good
That's sex scene and it was kind of dope too. Oh, yeah, digs
My god, what I sex scene and it was kind of dope too. Oh, yeah, digs. You remember that sex scene? One the one where oh the flashback. Yeah, the flashback thing. Oh
What did you do though? No, but he got that he's not used to getting a check that was the thing like I gave him a check
Because I'm savage. You know, I mean and he looked at my own okay, and then he gave me his debit card
Yeah, you said me to check no
Yeah, you used to get the debit card got to mine
And then he was like okay, well, you know, I'm gonna pay cash and he had cash. He had enough cash
Okay, he's like, you know, I'll come back and give you a better tip
You know cuz he could he could only give me as much cash. Oh, he can't even tip did he come back 20% did he come back?
Here just calling out
You know what I love this. he's not even saying some celebrity
One time a rock a bomb came in
Just in case Sydney is ever served you have your shit together and make sure you have a credit
You go on the radio bitch
No, come out here with a gift card
Don't talk about you want split the bill of nothing. I believe you're listening. Please give me my
She want that swap city life the kind of girl that was working 14 years on the grocery store and somebody have a eBT card
You are I remember that you remember that when you was younger. I don't know maybe I wasn't on food stamps now
That was the worst they used to have to show the book man. Oh
Color yeah, you come up short and they grab that microphone food stamps on to
You couldn't just wait across the other thing to get the change
That's the most embarrassing shit ever
I only want to embarrass these people
because you come in and it's an expensive place.
So you knew that before, when you knew that when you walked in.
Yes, I check my balance before I walk into any restaurant
because I don't want to order too much.
I want to know exactly what I'm getting.
And they should know.
Maxwell, you should be checking your account.
That's how I feel.
You might want to tell them what food stamps are.
Yeah, they might want to tell them what the listeners, what folks.
Okay, so I mean, I think these white people know.
Oh, they know what food stamps are.
I think they know what food stamps are.
Like what I use food.
They, they, statistically, y'all use it more than us.
Hold on, hold on, can you give it a microphone?
Give it a microphone.
Give it a microphone.
Can we have something from the white delegation?
I want food stamps for three years.
Yeah, really?
Oh, yeah!
Oh, yeah!
Yes!
All right.
Why are people doing bad?
Yes!
We love it.
Keep it up, y'all.
Keep it up.
We all broke.
Rids in the gap.
Oh, yeah.
45 million Americans on Fushtamp.
Rids in the gap.
45 million.
1 in 7.
Yeah, so they know what food.
Yo, you ever see the YouTube videos
of people that follow people with food stamps
and like, like, go, you shouldn't be buying a steak
with American money, but I saw you put this.
And like, people do that.
People who like food stamps shame,
like, I can't believe you just put it.
Yeah, I'm saying it.
I'm saying it.
That's a cause I can get behind.
No, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. Yo, you're gonna go stamp shame. leave yeah get behind
the
this is why this video stamp
shaman going viral on the internet featuring a woman confronting a man
who's paying at the register at a local wall I'm not a really hard find. I don't know. It's just trying to hit.
What's up?
I don't know.
I don't know.
It's a pretty much a remember.
I don't know.
It's like this name Meredith.
I'm the artist of the dress now.
It's a duck ring.
At least she's only another white person.
Yeah. There we go. It's a show. At least she's holding another white person. Yeah, let's cover that.
Yeah, there we go.
All right, keep it equal.
Yeah, keep holding each other down.
You know, that white-owned white cracker.
Oh, man.
You can have it.
They yell at each other, because we cut stores,
we beat each other.
We beat each other.
It's all even.
It's a people who do that a lot.
People like, I know Missouri, they pass laws,
and you can't buy certain types, certain cuts of meat.
Like, really?
If like lobster or like certain stuff like that, you have to be out crowd.
The quote, quote, luxury item.
Yeah, you should not be getting lobster.
What?
No, no, no, no.
If you ain't working, you shouldn't be getting lobster.
What?
What?
It's just food.
Lobster with lemon.
Lobster with lemon cilantro.
It's in you with this my low. No, stop mad, because this dude is eating lobster and it's fucking it. Lots of 11 lots of 11th cilantro
Because this dude is eating lobster and I'm fucking
For celebrations I wish that I got a victory lobster
You know how delicious a victory lobster is
Did you know which Bobby was here? It's all about a victory lobster
There's somebody right now who got a job. We can't afford lobster in this
With ETB or whatever ebd's living in a box
With ETB or whatever EBT's living in a box
The The same person everybody with ebc live underneath the Brooklyn bridge
On yeah, you can't make it
When you had your food stamps were you living in a box?
No, but I was living on a couch sometimes
Okay, oh wait did you wait wait and did you partake in some lobster?
You don't like it
I mean we were gonna get it. Oh, no, I'm not into seafood. I'm sorry
Like look at this list. Well what you can't get which is so they so they do limit. Yeah
Food for the household to eat such as meat fish fish and poultry. I mean, fish, fish is a lobster. Yeah, yeah. But look at this. You can't buy no pet food. You debit
hating mother. I like that you can't buy food. You shouldn't be able to buy pet food.
You shouldn't be having a pet like you. Yeah. You're poor. Can I claim the pet on my
taxes?
Somebody with food stamps and they petting the cat no no no no Shit together if you want a hollered city you need credit you need your whole lobster. You need no pets
So he had a cat and when we didn't have money for food
The cat
I
Would get on out there and get us some
Black grandfather A
TV she's like smell the TV
That I thought the cat can fly Oh Oh
I thought the cat can fly The cat's dead, mom you know it's a cat. I can't smoking menthol
She got me out here. I'm
Stressed
Smoking
So Albert running numbers
I've got a calculator.
If we put his family in a feed, you hear me?
I have a runnin' around with a debit card.
Yeah, he was. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha You changed all of you on debit cards
You're mad about that like on Tinder something like yo, I don't want no
I'm not here for hooking up for debit cards
All you all you pinheads back the fuck up
Oh You
You
You
You
You
You
You You
You
You
You
You You
You You You You You be like, oh shit, he's following him. He's being called. I feel like if you have a credit card, that's fine. But I just feel like if you're Maxwell,
what are you walking around with your debit card?
You should have a regular like,
connections was fine.
You're using your real connected money?
No, get a credit card.
A credit card, but do you respect all credit cards?
Because if I whip that a discoverer,
are you going to be like, are you going to have some?
Oh, no, yes.
See what I'm saying?
You don't take $90. You don't take diamonds dollars.
You don't take diamonds dollars.
Damn, you're just gonna be like,
Oh shit.
You take the rest of Simmons' Russ card.
Asking, you have to death Jay Markapelo logo on it.
I just wanna know what I want.
I have to know what I want.
What's in your heart?
That's my credit card.
If it's good enough for Sammy well Jackson.
John, did you just put it in a while? It's good enough for Sammy well Jackson
What bang Oh my god, she's fucks with Toronto Dominican. Yeah, TD
You fuck with it. Well, we're back. Do you fuck with Kanye made me proud of my debit card man? You fuck with city?
Yeah city back so and that's the only like a new york based bank. Yeah, damn that is that is some classes shit
What do you mean like so a nigga come to your restaurant?
He got to be from New York. Yeah, he had to go win into a city bank brand
He got to be from New York. Yeah.
He had to go into a city bank brand.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He had to open the check in our savings and all credit lines.
Yeah.
Open that line.
And make sure that he didn't put his card in his wallet for too long.
He might have any better.
I got to take it out.
Muxi said I got to let the briefs a little bit.
Get that air on it.
But you don't use this.
Oh, bad. I don't.
Oh, no.
Anyway, yo.
I just came up to have some fun.
I like the people who have that strip on it that says
like they just got that card.
That little orange, the orange, little, this is a new one.
It says like, oh, you got to like activate it.
I like it when they have that on.
That means they just got it.
So when Nika got it, the right something they to you. It's quite serious like there's no detour
There's no life being there. It's like I gotta go straight from the mailbox
They gotta go straight from the mailbox. Oh my god. Cindy walk on my
Cindy's table. Yeah, you got the mailbox. Don't even think you got open it right there
You can open it right there
I just bought a new wallet
Hello, hello, no, no, I'm sitting here with sitting yeah, I need a whole whole whole let me put you on speaker. She don't believe me
No, no, no, no, make sure that's not a depth. No, it's not a debit. No, it's not a debit. Make sure it's a credit, bitch. This is credit. Thank you.
Oh my God. Yeah, that is a back of the way I wanted.
Oh my God.
Tell everybody, I want every listeners.
You know what? The one y'all said we didn't have the strip on it.
You don't believe it.
She said me another way.
She don't believe me.
I want that Marshall stick on it, please.
You know what? Speaking of credit cards and debit cards,
if you have one, what you need to do is check out Blue Apron.
Blue Apron is the number one fresh ingredient
and recipe delivery service in the country.
Blue Apron's mission is to make incredible home cooking
accessible to everyone, like everyone baby.
You got to get with that.
They do this by supporting a more sustainable food system,
selling the highest standards for ingredients
and building a community of home chefs.
You know what I mean? Not all ingredients are created equally. You know fresh high quality ingredients make a real difference.
So it's important to know where your food comes from. That's what you got to do. All right.
And the impact on how so this what happens?
Let's say you out there and you finally get you finally get Sydney, right? Sydney finally. She sees that you got this debit card
You see you you see you doing things. She like you got things. She's like, you got credit, you like,
yeah, I got credit, I got blue apron too.
Weap boo, and then she comes over, right?
So now cook together, right?
And you build a strong family bond.
And you know what, scientifically,
research shows that blue apron families cook nearly three
times more often, you know?
And those who spend a lot to eat at restaurants or hot
and grocery chains can now spend under $10 per person
for a delicious meal.
So let's say you got that debit card and you were kind of ashamed of being around Sidney. eat at restaurants or hot and grocery chains can now spend under $10 per person for a delicious meal.
So let's say you got that debit card and you were kind of ashamed of being around Sydney.
What you do, you get this blue apron, you eat at home.
You want to say what they have to do?
Upcoming meals, they got the sun salmon paccato with orange, orange, orange, broccoli.
They got pork chops with the miso butter with the bok choy and marinated apple.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, they got that vegetable chili, baked sweet potatoes, with the crispy tortilla strips.
You know what I'm saying?
It's for the last thing, huh?
That's like the tortilla.
The tortilla.
The tortilla.
The tortilla.
All right, so.
They got the spicy script,
coconut curry with the cabbage and rice.
I'm doing this for the streets.
I can't.
The streets are gonna get blue apron.
Yeah, you can be in a gang and get blue apron.
Don't worry about the colors.
No, that's what that box is. That's a fresh produce. If you want,
if you want to learn more, just go to blue apron, you know, check out this week's menu and get your
first three meals free with free shipping and handling by going to blue apron dot com slash dude.
You got to go to blue apron dot com slash dude. You gotta go to blueaprin.com slash dude.
You're gonna love how it feels, how it tastes,
and you can create incredible home meals with blue aprons,
so don't wait, all right?
So once again, that's blueaprin.com slash dude.
Blue apron, a better way to cook.
Hey, go to Pacific Sun, that's the best.
That was a great read, that was a great read.
That was a great read.
That was a great read.
That was a great read.
That was a great read.
That was a great read. That was a great read. They gonna play that every February
Mike you need some water man cuz it was a
Sorry, I have a debit card. I got nervous
You're clapping your hands. You're saying you like get that
Yes, bro, get you Clapin' like Nicole Kim and the Oscars look like a seal another harnigan. Yeah, I need another harnigan man
You real Jamaican, you know, you know, I don't yeah, you don't mess with it. It won't stop with this that
No, no more. Okay, yeah, what we used to have when we did pump the brakes. Oh, it never ends man
Yeah, I woke up next to plenty of women. I shouldn't be next to oh, yeah
Yeah
You know
You being yourself What's your debit call ass waking up next the strangest try to get some credit you worst conscience ever
This is literally a city versus black man today. What?
Maxwell is like, I got platinum albums,
but I got a debit card.
What?
You should have a platinum debit card.
I just put your Maxwell patent himself.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
Oh, yeah.
I don't get to the pat down.
We're the freaking blazer on and everything.
You got to do the pat down.
When you're money ain't right, you got at least pretend.
What's your money?
I don't know how to handle my own bills.
Uh, I have people for that.
Oh my god.
But what does the Patel do?
If you don't have money, you just patting me.
No, it's a way to make me like, please forgive me.
I have nothing right now.
I broke sign language.
You're just trying to tell somebody you broke what I was saying.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I'm sorry.
We all started doing a beep. We all started doing a beep. We all started doing a beep. We all started doing a beep. We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep.
We all started doing a beep. We all started doing a beep. We all started doing a beep. We all started doing a beep. We all started doing a beep. That was hurtful. It's like as comics we understood the joke because black people we like wait a minute
In my defense I have a city bank debit card
I think that's a power power of a woman right here. I got a sweat like black woman Now let me show you my debit card. Okay. Okay. They trade on print on screen
But why she got a husky? Oh she got to go to her shoe
Why can't WD listeners why people we just want you know black women usually keep their debit cards in their shoe
I
Choose about the point that I just shoot all the time when they wear red bottoms. They go to Bank of America
They're all in their shoes. It's all in their shoes. All right What happened? Oh! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no I'm not making count as clear.
I'm breaking.
Oh my god.
I never see one and a half.
I never see one and a half.
The card is ripped in about two.
She won't keep that.
You ain't shit.
She's sitting here.
Look, she keeping her cat. Look look all myself was themed this came back
You had listeners out there making new accounts I was
In my chair a minute ago
Here my snap my
Small I thought I had my snap Me too small God damn debit card livin out your bad
You got a debit card in two pieces
I'm a bullshit
You got her back in her back in her back
I'm packing rocks
Look at what I have
I'm gonna put tape on it
Oh my God
So you're on Crutches?
Yeah, she's a fleck in her anger towards herself
On us
That's what she want that new orange tape on her.
Oh, it's got you going to put a tape on our own car.
She just wants something that matches.
Oh, my God.
You went on.
Yeah, I know.
I'm a comedian, huh?
I am hilarious.
OK.
I'm super funny.
That's what heads about.
Ah, yeah, that's funny.
She hand that card like be careful
Don't hurt yourself You might cut yourself your swipe it too hard. You're gonna break it half a seven
But you know what though. That's a good that's a good sympathy card
Because I was out with a chicken she pulled that that out. I'll be like, yo, you need something.
I would.
I would.
Is it your phone going to be on next week?
You work hard out here.
You work hard out here.
If you got to listen, if you got to put the check five ways,
and I'll put that card down to be like, Sydney, we got it.
Hell yeah.
I would.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Did you do the break on purpose?
She said, that's like a plot.
She just like, wait a minute. You know what? I would have thought. I would The break-up purpose That's like a plot you know what I would have thought I would have thought I would have thought that but the card was
Ashi
You pull the card. Hey gas
Never need some lotion
I'm dead. Anybody has shape butter?
You need only me.
I'm farmy.
Sidney Cards.
Sidney Cards need a cast on it for two weeks.
Look at her.
A cast on that, my fuck.
Oh my god.
That is so judgmental.
You know you wrong.
You know you fucked that up.
Shit, listen, y'all laughed, right?
It was funny.
Hood debit card.
Is there only going to come up?
He said debit card.
Debit card.
Hood debit card.
What is that, buddhist?
It's a budget cruiser. It's a budget cruiser. He's a cruiser. Look at this band called, call a hood debit car what is your budget? it should be $10,000
he's a bruiser
look at this bank called give me my credit
military star that can't be a bank
a military star of bank
that much like the white rice that keep popular
what is this? Walmart
I just tried to random search
for debit car
oh no no this seeing terrible this is horrible. This is this is hallmark lay enough a bunch of people this year
What they do? Don't they huh they do that every guy, but they're doing like a lot of people because they're losing to online mark like
Retail system like like Amazon shit. Yeah, that's a thing like I'm
Automation it's like destroying everything like even like people that do have skills and stuff
But even death is gonna be replaced by robots in about 10 years. No, no, no, no
I'm telling you, yeah, I got friends here in the medical field
They're like we pretty much they like the materials are already cleaned by robots and technology
But you need to do like the surgeries and stuff like a person. Not everything
Yeah, not everything would you get a brain surgery from a robot? No, but I mean
If you ain't got the Ryan sure something like is either the robot or you die you think the robot is the cheaper alternative
You go to a person a person is gonna give you a deal
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You're the reason why we don't have automated cars right now
Sick reason why I hate like I want to automate a car like Jersey's giving out like computers license and shit like that Yeah, they are Jersey's what one of the few states that gave a little computer license. I'm sorry
I'm sorry in Newark nor has it. Yeah, France, Dan, they've been driving around like automated cars
Yeah, we have a huge Tesla you can't they can't be back
How you going rock like you can't still a automated car? It will return and put it past Newark
I don't know what you're talking about
Newark do you know new? Yes, yeah, you know
Newark you know I know all your missing cars go the port
I got you fly. You'll call you needed to
The AC because away Gordon
Yeah, you look at extra underground do I should not have more It's a show about underground railroad on WGN for the listeners
I keep blaming this extra shirt like that makes it this cute like I man
I'm with his extra shirt. What's in the cup? I nothing now. What was it? It was a mirror vice. Okay, that's what it was
That'll take you up around it. Yeah, I agree. Yeah, that's me or not. I know I like how you a scientist with this
Because that'll take you over round eight nine degrees. Yeah, that's some ear now.
But I know I like how you were scientists with this.
I know.
I'm not doing that.
That's why I started drinking.
Jolly to do your swing.
Oh, yeah, that's smear enough.
Well, Mike Brown is cool as a cucumber.
And you over here sweating.
I'm in Bobby's shader.
The time show of his differing.
Oh, it's different.
It looks good.
I'm out here trying to look away on his side.
I got credit over here, babe.
She's different over here. I wasn't ready for all this warm weather in February
No, no one told me it was gonna be 70 degrees in February. Oh, yeah
I thought I was going to enjoy a couple more weeks of coolness just coming out
I think I'll enjoy my back down
I hope that's everything
Yeah, it's so hot. It's so hard. Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, it's so hot that when Remi dropped the disc record
I thought it wasn't like appropriate for the weather
It's too nice out side, but it shit
White delegation do you do you know you get the mic? Have you heard of Remi?
No, no, have you heard of Nicki Minaj?
Yeah, she said kind of
You humble humble Nikki please. Yeah, I don't like lobster. I don't like Nicki bitch
She'll fit in this bitch
I don't like it. Yeah. Shelf into this bitch.
Real lobster real ass.
I don't like that bitch.
I allergic to bones.
Boom, boom, boom.
I don't like that bitch.
What's up, cello?
You don't want me to catch me outside, bitch.
Yes, yes.
I get it.
So Nicki Minaj is a rapper in the black community.
And she was, she got the shit disted out of her
by Remi Ma, a rapper from the Bronx
who just came out of jail by shooting her friend in the stomach.
Surprise! She's very on-brand of the Bronx who just came out of jail by shooting her friend in the stomach surprise
She's very on brand of the Bronx. Yeah very on brand of the Bronx
I mean if someone from Bronx is going to jail it's probably like a bullet to the stomach. It's either that um
I don't love you. I love it
I think we should I think we should play if you can play I don't think we could play because it will violate and the seven minutes long
Mike you could just play us a sentence today I mean
Just a long
Wait, wait, first did you guys all hear it or not? Yeah, she is you all heard it. Yeah, okay
I read a blog. Okay, you read a black sounds right
My delegation just learned about Remi Monning just just now her name was originally Remi Martin and you know
Copyright infringement because you guys are familiar with Remi Martin the drink
Must be black drink. Okay, Remi Martin and you know copyright infringement because you guys are familiar with Remi Martin the drink Must be black drink. Okay. Remi Martin
Remi is a devil black guy. Have you heard you heard of it? God. I have heard of it. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah, but no
Remi's super top shelf
Kabaas. I'm not a super top
Oh, yeah, cuz we used to do the incredible hoax, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, we just all get up
Who is the top show for though like
Across the board I just a hood thing
It's a good drink, but that's why I thought I just went to the white delegation would have heard of it That's that that Remy man fucking evaporates in your mouth like
Damn, yeah, you looking like you have an old school moment
Like really tasty damn. Yeah, you looking like you have an old school moment
Break the tank and shit
I'm rocking chair on the floor like like Rippie Martin is that good
it takes the ass drink man
you know it took with what I started thinking about it
it took me back
oh you know
and I'm sorry
John's point of taping her ears in his head
and
septations and chit-chat
yeah it's a time show
oh no I know what you're just saying
have we been doing the bomb band?
yeah there you go
you got the bomb now?
shit you got the bomb band?
deep I'm a stab you have to now you know what? no no we're not going to do a bomb band. Yeah, there you go. Okay, you got the bomb now. You got the bomb band and deep. I'm a stab you
Now we're not gonna do the bomb band and on this episode
Because we gonna uplift each other
The whole black episode with the white delegation and others
We don't know bomb band and is over here. Okay, so Remi Ma
Distract this track. I feel like she didn't need the first part of it. What was the first part?
We're just talking about Nikki's ass the whole time. I mean, but she I think I think it's I think it's something that people know
Like they don't they might not know the back like the white delegation. You know that she has Nicki Minaj has a big ass
Yeah, that's about what extent of what I know. Yeah, he said that's all I know her for you know, I mean
I'm a fair I'd rather know that than the music honestly wrote what
That her last the blue the pink printer whatever that you rather no, no, I mean, but she can rap though
Nikki Nikki my no rap, but she has too many guests on her album. She does too many pops
We're hold on all the 90s was like featuring this feature in that. Yeah, it's okay to have feature
like featuring this feature in that feature. Yeah, it's okay to have feature.
Feature, yeah, man.
On your album, it's very cool.
I just can't do this, Brandon.
Don't do this to yourself.
We already can't, no, don't do this to yourself.
I think she had to talk about the girls' ass
cause it was all fake.
And like, there's a bunch of young black women
getting ad shots now and that's not cool.
No, that's a big tool.
That's a good one.
I don't like the ad shots.
But you know what, ad shots?
I do not like ad shots.
Why not?
I feel like it's a lie.
And I feel like.
First of all, if you would be ever, I feel like I'd be a lie. Why not? I feel like it's a lie. And I feel like.
That's all.
If you would be here,
I feel like I feel like I feel the matter.
So what's wrong?
What's wrong?
I feel like I feel like I feel the matter.
So what's wrong?
I feel like I feel like I feel the matter.
I feel like I feel like I feel the matter.
So what's wrong?
I feel like I feel like I feel the matter.
So what's wrong?
I feel like I feel like I feel the matter.
So what's wrong?
I feel like I feel like I feel the matter.
So what's wrong?
I feel like I feel like I feel the matter.
So what's wrong?
I feel like I feel the matter.
So what's wrong?
I feel like I feel like I feel the matter. So what's wrong? I feel like I feel like I feel the matter. So what's wrong? I got a million in this, David. Niko, when your limits reach, you take it,
you take it, you take it.
Devin Carz Lawproof.
You need an nigga with a debit, that's what you need.
You need to lick, do you want it?
Y'all nigga lick this, Devin go, huh?
I know, nigga.
Everybody got a debit.
Capital one, keeping you on.
I don't let it go.
You have, I have a dealt with a fake, with a fake debt, you on. You gotta have capital one keeping you on. I don't let it go.
You have, I have, I have a dealt with a fake,
with a fake care, I have.
You have.
It has, it's, it's, it felt like,
it was like regular in certain parts
and like rock hard in other parts.
You can't smash guys that.
It's not, I don't think I've ever had that.
Got a poppy ball.
Listen, if you take the train,
you can't talk about another woman's ass
You don't take the train
You can't talk about a woman at all
If you ever breathe ever in your life
You do not have because that's a guy as you have an advantage you don't have to like shoot stuff in your balls to make it like heavier
You can have a regular ass dick and somebody will be like, oh my god.
He's the best man.
God stand it for real.
We would like a big ass, but we don't like need a big ass.
Now I've been with some small out of all the body parts.
Men do prefer they need a good ass.
Hold the weight white, white delegation.
Deepu, you can't do that with your hands.
Here.
Steady shoe. We're actually dealing with talking about the post serious that will your hands up the head. Here, here, here. That's how it man. Damn. I like it all.
Yeah, I like it all.
Okay, okay.
Okay, that was a very feminine sense.
I appreciate that.
So, I'll go with it whenever you got.
So, I think we don't have to like shoot up our dick or anything like that, but it's like
when women deal with it too.
What?
You don't watch porn, do you?
Nope.
There's tons of porn and pay not-
And I, Jackson's and like, shit.
Yeah, you said you meant to say
injection.
You said it.
You can inject your dick.
Okay.
You could do shit to your dick to
extend because I know we have
because you got to keep it going.
Today the black guy.
No, you're going to learn something.
We have no clue about this penis
enlargement thing.
This is just not.
All right.
This is a million dollar business.
What are you talking about?
Everybody's trying to get a big
dick out here.
I don't want to wash this shit.
Oh, yeah.
It's a lot of ads. We don't we don't want. So I asked you to get a big dick out here. I don't want to wash this shit. It's a lot of ads.
We don't want to...
It's a lot of ads.
You're gonna get so much ads.
But you believe that's real?
No, not at all.
I think it's just a snake oil.
Right, right, right.
Well, it's snake oil in the dick?
No, not actually.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I don't know anything about it.
I don't know what you...
What's the name for it?
We can learn a lot to wave all these people. He said no. All don't know what he's good for it. Please do Lord want to wave all these
He said no all I heard was all I heard was no, I think it's just snake
I'm like on the crack head doing the legs
How would you know makes and put them in Dicks?
My dick leather
My dick leathery what is wrong? I just wanted it big. I didn't want it
My dick levery
I'm this is why our school sisters are feeling
Now Like snago goes back to the snago. I was like you can sell like
Snake as a remedy for something
He said I thought it was just
He said I thought it was just naked
Bomba juice
New York
My community I'm out of tune
Huge women and some are not by no dude, you know what I might have you might have to write down have another cold
That was a one somebody get Gordon some water. Yeah, you know what I am am I really sweating that bad you
Like I'm in a fourth quarter like come on coach. I think I still got some in-mute coach We So him okay, so wait so oh this is
So they inject they inject what something into the
This is this is real, but the average dude is not doing that. Yeah
I'm putting a need on my average woman is trying to like better her body every single day. She's trying to get bigger
booze bigger ass yeah Kim K contour extensions like this is all things that women do on an average like a regular dude
Mm-hmm. Just being a white tea exactly a boo-cut gene. Why do women do it? Why do women do it do women yeah cuz how long does it hold up really the great question like a face mask flat
You guys like she's the commasool
I don't know the expiration on it, but I know that like it's you're putting your life at risk
Yeah, I don't think I don't think I've ever I don't think I've ever been with a chick
To got a you know?
You got girls that look better than Janet, but you never had a fake press.
All right.
Damn.
I'm so excited.
I'm so excited.
I'm thinking anything fake, anything fake press.
Oh yeah, everybody got it, some fake press, but I'm saying I'm talking about ass like that.
I mean, I said you just look at each other.
I mean, yeah, I have fake boobs.
She was so what?
You know, and I'm regular, I'm here with y'all.
10, I'm regular. I'm here with y'all. 10, I'm regular.
I'm regular.
I've got fake boobs.
I'm regular.
God damn.
And messages are signed.
Like, when I invite it, it's the need to come.
I'm like, a sign.
No fake boobs.
No.
So, prayer to watch you tell me.
You can't have a fake thing and say you regular.
If I had like a big, a fake dick, I would not say I'm regular.
I'd be like, I got this big ass fake dick.
I mean, I'm regular.
I'm regular.
And I'm special. When I say regular, I mean, I'm one saying I'm regular. I'd be like, I got this big ass fake name. I mean, I'm special. And I'm special.
When I say regular, I mean, I'm one of the other women
in the community, like, you know, I'm just doing
what I have to do.
I'm like, I'm just like,
I mean, my body's slept with Shakespeare fake tips, don't I?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's not, that's not, that's not a big, really.
You would know, you would know.
I slept with, oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
I never dated a white woman.
We've never been in a relationship,
but I've had sexual encounters. Can you kiss your mother listen? Because the way you said yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I never dated a white woman. We've never been in a relationship, but I've had sexual encounters.
Can't get your mother listening,
because the way you said that, you were like,
I've never been in a series with like,
Mom.
I'll be honest with you,
I never would.
I never would.
I never would.
I never would.
I never would be like,
I never would be like,
I never would be like, I never would be like,
I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like,
I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like,
I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like,
I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like,
I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like,
I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, I never would be like, Asian Spanish took a white go to prom for your brother. I thought it was cute. She would murder you
My mom's been saying it to me all the way away. Oh, you got us out like when you think about saying anything about black women
Just stop yourself
Yeah, I was a black woman until whoa
black women until whoa stop it
make a foot on my
democard
I got I got confidence
yo
I got I got
I got a lift
got seven jobs
it all goes to the
debit
your self-esteem
oh
oh so my director
pos it don't mean nothing
nothing
I got a 500 dollar
credit for Toronto's
Dominican date
because of my director
pos it's
I got wow overdraft
Man
So what's going on with your brother? He's never dated a black girl and now what's going on?
Now he's dating this Asian girl
He's like his last girlfriends have been Filipino and okay, I think this one's Korean
I'm nice and like all my family used to like have like a race red.
What?
What?
His brother's racist.
Okay.
No, no.
That was not right.
Anyways, I'm just happy he out here.
You know, he's not racist.
He grew up in a suburb.
Like after we moved out of North, my mom moved to Maplewood, which is a predominantly white
go to Bar Mitzvah.
He's a suburban race.
When he's only dating Asian women.
No, he's not only dating.
Like I know he's like he had a he's had a ton of like
black girls that he hooked up with but he'd never
weren't relationship.
The only ones that he's brought home have been white
Spanish.
Well, let me ask you this.
What so then the percentage of black women accessible to him was really low. Yes
And like like I like I don't even my sister's in my mom about this all the time
Like, yeah, he grew up be play soccer. I play soccer also. He's like you did the same thing
But I grew up in Newark. I grew up around black women. I grew up in Spanish women my whole interest has been
That type of one that's no one when I got to school
John, what was it? But you're growing up too and talk about I grew up in Denver. Yeah, so I whole interest has been that type of one. You know what? When I got to school.
John, what was it?
But you growing up too and talk about.
I grew up in Denver.
Yeah, so.
So yeah, I did.
Yeah, you know, not to mention I was a ball playing.
No, I'm just saying when you're doing that, you do.
You saw brother Denver.
Yeah, I mean, when you playing ball, you date a lot of white women on a college camp
But you know what though? I noticed though like when I was on the hood circuit when I first started comedy
It was all black women. Yeah, that I was dating so I noticed that I I also
Kind of date what I'm around
All mainstream rooms. Yeah, by myself dating a lot more white women
So but I don't but I
Face
That face don't you
But I'm just saying it's it's based a lot on my environment. Yes, so
But I'm saying your brothers
Only black women we gotta make sure we got debit card situation
Right, I gotta make sure we got a lot on this for that
We want to get on a train and go to any city and find him
He got a travel. He got to go in the
Exposition. Why is there got to be an
Expression travel woman. Yeah, why the other guy travel? There's women getting on a eight-hour flight to Spain
Why is brother? Why are they doing that?
This is what people are trying to find love
Let me tell you something.
Soon as the chick's AC from the Bronx, we are Platonic.
That's it.
And see.
And see.
And see.
Oh my god.
I hope people all the time, man.
You like, it's hard for black dudes to date,
like, especially like in the city, like, tender rank
for black dudes, man.
That's why you got going on Soul Swipe.
Soul Swipe, but awful.
All those dudes.
I've never been on one of them. Hold on, hold on, hold on way hold away hold away hold away I've never been on the dating app though for the listener soul swipe is a black dating app for the white
delegation to black dating app um you might
you might
I've never been on one of those I've never been on a dating thing now a dating site or dating app
It's like so much fun man let me tell you you. We work in a club full of people,
so I don't see, and I'm finicky,
because I know I would be pissed off.
No, I'm serious.
I was like, I get a hoes, okay,
and I'm funny too.
I'm big in hoes.
I mean, in the back of the hoes,
I'm just saying, if you can meet somebody in person,
you know what I mean?
Because we meet a lot of people,
you know what I would rather do that,
because yeah, you don't want to get out on a date with somebody,
then they do something quirky.
And you know, know like tell the truth
We all know like in the first five minutes or so when you meet somebody like whether this is gonna get or not
Right, so why would I waste that you know what I mean? I meet people in quick contact
A lot of times after shows or at work. So I'll just roll with that
I'm not gonna go on a app and then go all the way to some restaurant where Sydney standing there judging my call. You better get somebody else girl.
You know, and you gotta take it out to this. That's what I'm saying.
You can't just take it with Jimmy John. Right, and now I'm sitting there with this shit.
And I don't like her after five minutes. I'm like, why did I even fucking,
my brother always makes fun of me like man you ain't never been on none of the sites.
I ain't never been on none of the sites. I never been on I know you don't have enough storage on your phone
That's a real truth
You got the lever first you know I'll be out here. I kids with you ain't got
He's got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy you got a guy Oh, that's Nicola. That's Nicola, bro. You're gonna need it. You're gonna need it, don't slip on it. You're gonna need that snake oil.
Oh my gosh.
Oh man, wait, Jack, Jack.
So how would a woman, because now you're doing
you opening up, or like you're torn with Leslie, right?
Yes.
Okay.
So Leslie, you're on set up.
So you're torn.
Wow, homie.
So now that you're torn with her, how have the women
after the show has been like compared to
when you first started to just doing a mainstream to be in on a road?
Like it's like a better thing.
Is it like, what's the difference?
You know what?
I've always told people because a lot of times like newer comedians be asking about pussy.
I'll tell my friends.
No, I'm pulling out of blood right now.
You know what?
I know, right.
And you leaning back into jail.
They weren't asking about push.
But you know what?
You don't start like that without pulling out a blood.
You know what?
I think the thing is, man, no matter what quality of chick
you get, it remains the same.
The speed at which they'll take it off goes up,
depending upon your heat.
Yeah, that's true.
So the quality of the chick so that I get remains the same,
but depending upon how hot I am
at the time, the faster they'll take it off.
If I'm super hot, got a lot of chick going on, chicks will take it off.
Okay.
Go ahead and zoom here and take it off.
If you're not hot, you still get a hot chick, but you got it.
It's going to take a little while, a little while longer before they take it off.
Yeah, we have Bobby Kelly calling in.
Oh, great.
Let's get Bobby in.
Let's get Bobby in.
You got Bobby Kelly live on the phone from
Hey Bobby, how you doing?
I just want to say I am in over the right now the sun setting on the ocean
I'm with my family just get out of the ocean
Turn down the I keep doing it. It really buggedged me. How easily I'm replaced. I mean, I'm a good day, Bob. I happen to good day.
Yeah, why are you enjoying these hot cars when I'm away?
You got question, I'll Google it later.
Did you hear my wife? I probably whiped her down that when she was a shitting at it. Did you hear my wife? I probably wife opened the door and I want you to know what you're doing. It shouldn't matter.
You have a wife.
How was it, man?
How was it, man?
It was awesome.
I was in the front of the water today.
I keep hearing blah, blah.
I'm thinking I'm losing my mind.
Bobby?
Yeah, you might be on my throat.
I'm going to keep hearing blah, blah, blah.
I think I'm on my throat.
I think I'm on my throat.
I think I'm on my throat.
I think I'm on my throat.
I think I'm on my throat.
Bobby.
Bobby.
Yeah, you might be on my throat. I think I'm on my throat. I think I'm on my throat. I think I'm on my throat. I think I'm losing my mind. Bobby? Yeah, you might be having a stroke. I'm having a surgery.
I think I'm having a sunstroke, a regular stroke.
You know, all the strokes have happened, right?
Different strokes.
Different strokes.
I look out, I look out like really far out.
It's Tony Woods.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, for the white delegation, Tony Woods
is a black comedian who's really hilarious.
Please second out on line after the show.
I got us.
I got us.
Robert.
Hello, the artist.
Tony Woods is the ocean.
Follow him.
You guys save him.
He's asking for help.
I don't know Tony could swim.
I'm nothing for the white delegation.
Some of us.
I still haven't learned yet.
Some of us still haven't learned yet.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
I guess what?
Yeah.
I can't.
You came in and you came in.
What you just said on me, Max?
You did.
You did.
You did. That's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that know what it is. That sunscreen, I know. It's just moving.
Because we're not supposed to be in the sun.
No.
I'm going to come back real basil.
I'm going back real basil.
I'm down here with Chuck Knight and Tony Woods.
I was just trying to show that he is black friends.
Yeah. He waits until he leaves the plot on his black friends. Like we got Mike Brown hosting, we that he is black friends. Yeah. He waits till he leaves to ploddle and black friends.
Like, we got Mike Brown hosting, we got a whole black half.
I'm out in a room with black people.
I know black people, guys.
It's February, just like, you know.
The last day.
Yeah, this is the last day.
The last day of black history.
This is it.
I'm getting replaced with Sydney.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
It's going to be a whole thing.
When Bobby comes, he got a whole lot of car.
It's all different.
Call Bobby for credit cards, though. That's the thing. It's gonna be a whole thing when Bobby got It's a different I have all the black people that good burned the water the blacks. They love me.
I have pictures of my family and vacation and you guys a whole black podcast.
Yes. That's what that's what it is. I will see you here too though.
Yeah, people's here too. I want people to come on.
Hey, Bobby, real quick quick credit a debit
Better than that. Do you have a debit card or do you have a credit card? No man? You can't I got it look I got an MX card
Yes Bobby. Yeah
Bobby said I was white
Bobby got laps
Bobby got lobster They'll Bobby cut in there. Yeah, son
Sydney just took a swan
Sydney's already got one chew on
What you got the business I get the Benz and Max the gold and I get the plan
He got planted in a business. This is the Olympics. Oh man.
He's on records.
I need to give me a barcat.
Oh man.
What the fuck I'm doing?
You're tuning next week for the black cast.
Yeah.
Black cast.
God damn.
When you get a credit card, I had a credit card.
I got myself in debt.
Me too.
And then the way I got out of it is a true way my credit card
i just got the regular
the mx
okay because you have to pay it at the end of the month so if i come to
food and i didn't get it
you have to pay it
okay and i needed it for my flights and stuff to do calmly sorry
it forced me to be uh... for all
okay
for the black.
I haven't. I haven't.
Don't do that. Don't do that.
I'm just making sure I'm just making sure everybody knows why
delegation tell me you might not know I'm just a fruit
of me. She's a body.
Fruit was a sick. Right?
Isn't it?
Yeah, I'll do it.
Okay.
We'll go for a
go for a go.
All right. A Jewish person just popped up. I'm never gonna studio after this shit. Yeah, we're gonna take it all the equipment. We're a deep you can't save this
So you know
Brandon doesn't steal
and it doesn't steal. Stop it. Now, you just, you dig about it and then you feel guilty
and then you blog about it.
Bobby, you know that blog is private.
I said, you just don't do this to me right now.
Oh, Bobby, we got two guests who drove up from Orlando.
I know, I was looking at that.
It's so funny, though.
You couldn't get more trouble than those guys.
Yeah, we can't get, yeah.
We didn't even go there get to see who they voted for
because you know, we didn't want to make it weird.
No.
You know, Orlando, Orlando,
and Aaron's going to spend a lot of chops.
That's Aaron.
That's Eric from Orlando Florida, Bobby.
That's me.
Can you hear him?
Hi, buddy.
Hi, it's Aaron.
Hi.
Hi. Hey, yeah. Do you have. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi I'm scared.
I got some scary.
I got a gun.
This file has cost me around $18.
I'm off this phone call right now.
I'm going to get people with my kids.
And then I'm going to share with Tony Woodden Chuck Nice And you guys I really thank you from the buy love you know
I love everybody thank you for doing the podcast Mike
Brandon you guys the best
Thanks for stepping in people and and more and more and I love you taking care of watching it making sure everybody has water
I love it. Okay. I love it Bob
Take care of everybody We all help out. I'm like
I just put up on water. Oh, bro. I'm super I toasting the Bobby cuz he ain't coming back. We're gonna take this shit
Oh, if you're in a room, but make sure to take a Bobby Kelly in his black friends
Bobby's in a closed alley you see my friends
Bobby's gonna close all day. You see my friends?
They're gonna be a bonus show if you sign up and download the y-cast app
tour we should do that I let it go. Clip it up for Bobby Kelly for calling it. Clip it up in, man. Let you know here.
Got black friends, real black friends, you know what I mean?
Did I mention Keith, but it's okay.
Yeah.
It's okay.
It's so nice.
I love how Tony Woods is there with him and just shelling Bobo.
I don't even know if there's like a lot of black people out in the room but just shelling
Bobo.
No. No, right? Have you people out in a robot just yelling Bob oh Wait, no, no, right?
Have you been over I have yeah, oh I went there with my friends my single friends
Yeah, I was looking for men and it's not a place a it's all families
It's like man families and just like white people in like braids. It's crazy like what would you mean?
Oh, so everybody like bowdare yeah
Everybody's like White delegation is such a white thing to do have either
Viewed done braids dreadlocks or something else with the hair that you shouldn't have done cornrows
Claire did corals. I was a Florida. Oh
In Georgia. Yeah, she said they those trailer park wait wait a minute
Georgianians of course
Everybody I saw some girls in bikinis wait. Oh, let's really the white one
See just tight. Yeah, and I just wanted to chat and you got questions
I just hit ourselves. I answered some questions
I noticed but yeah, you ever notice like like that's the one thing
I don't like about going to vacation to islands is when you see all the white people getting cornrows on the beach
Yeah, that is like wearing a snow globe when you head so when you get back like y'all don't vacation
You're not cool get out of my face
Thank you, T. Poo. Yeah, this picture got nothing to do with nothing
It's just
People it just I just Google a ruby tourists and well they got the one black friend over there
No, the two the two in the end she looks end. She looks Spanish. She looks like she's poor to read and probably
She got a
Like yeah, she's definitely mixed
She's mixed. Yeah, she got some mix in her
So
Are you
Disgusting
She got that good here. She got that good
People say I'm gonna miss got some next She got that good here He's got the bigger one beginning and also
Why is some of these abs almost look weird though like the girl that is a
Abs look right now, don't be coming at at me okay, I got quite a ant to be car, okay
I'll check all the marks that you look
I'm a friend
They're in the rubah you don't have to look that good in the room anyways now Miami
I bet you none of them are a good land though. Have you been to a visa? I've been to a visa. Yes
I'm a traveler Bitch, none of them are a good lay though. Have you been to a visa? I have been to a visa. Yes, I do.
You use a traveler.
I actually what I can, you know.
Everybody got a pass.
Everybody here got a pass.
Yeah, I got a pass.
I had to win Mo Jet Blue.
I've been Mo Jet Blue to get on that trip.
But I made it happen.
Cindy Payne, who puts an installment, she out there like,
hold on, hold on, let me put some else out. Hold on, hold on, hold on. My check clear next week, hold like hola hola hold on me put some else on hola hola hola
Particularly next week hola hola hola. I got
Was it adjet blue to okay? I got you I got you
I'm just like that that I'm just so reckless on here today you know
Vembo is like crazy because you see people transit like transfer and like $20 and stuff to you
Yeah, damn just just go to ATM
I don't want to know what the search on it. I got a debit. You don't want the search cards like I did it
I don't want the search cards on it
That's an extra dog
I also anti Venmo is convenient and it's on the go
If I'm sitting there and I'm like man I want to hit ATM bro
If you get this I've been with you right now
It was so hard about that
I like square cash because you get the money that day
I don't like Venmo because if you do it on a Friday
I'm not getting my money till Monday
Why do you need your money so bad, Sydney?
I need my money You trying Sydney? I need my money.
You're trying to say it.
I need my money.
What kind of money are you getting?
Anyway, you don't care about when you get your money.
Why you need your money so bad?
You just let me need some money.
You want to talk?
Mike, you want to talk about Vemmo money?
Yeah, let's talk about it.
You got a donation from a fan of comedy outliers
sending Mike money for drinks.
Guess what Mike did?
He ain't even mention it to me. But I there was public on bed mo I didn't need to
mention it she said she said she could have found you if you had bed mo as well I
did that's how I saw it
since my hair said comedy outliers takes from the lives the weekly laughs how much
she said 50 weekly laughs. How much she sent? 50. I needed a weekly that day. I needed a weekly.
Bitches out. He don't care about God. I need a weekly. I'm like, I would have done the
same thing like so. Right?
Damn right.
50 dollars. This is pro niggas taking my money too. You ain't on Facebook for any
chicken learning me before. She signed my page and said, I got a little something special. You think she'll make me laugh occasionally on all your
podcast. I said, all of my only got one. She said, no, your peers. I said, thank you.
Well, okay, cool. Whoever that's saying, she's going to be a good grandma one day.
She is. I just want to thank the white delegation guy. Because you know that wasn't a black woman.
That was a white woman. Definitely a white woman. She might be feeling you that she might have just put
Oh, so this is like booty money. Yeah, she might have planted
Okay, I don't need that. He playing the seed. I could get on a tray. I can't do it.
$50. That's a week. That's a good week. We're gonna have to all her some dick. That's what's gonna happen. Hey
I mean sometimes I'm just gonna go down that way man
Damn Gordon what you bring through
We're gonna do some shit. One way or another. We're gonna get that lobster Damn
Victory lobster
Don't hate on it. You said sometimes it'd be like, you know, you never, you never like went on like, you know,
just you never round with somebody because they like you so much.
And it's treating you nice.
He was like a guess like I was like, he was hungry.
So you want some meals, grilled cheese.
Listen, when we say grilled cheese is what you're reading with.
Treat me right.
What do you mean?
You're supposed to take me here.
We go.
Here we go.
You supposed to. That right there, that right there. We supposed to yes, yes, yes
From downtown
Like a half-door shot
That's it just came out of nowhere
We also look it up That's it. That's it. This came out of nowhere. Oh, yeah. We all saw looking around
So I have you run out of this have you ever paid for a date for like pay for the complete date when I'm out complete date never
No, I mean I've eventually thrown in like a first story.
Yeah, yeah, like second or third.
Maybe like all by around, but like.
Around.
Around the pond.
I'm not like a cheese.
I'm talking about.
And the white glue.
And around.
And he just drinks.
He just drinks no food.
He drinks.
He just drinks no food.
He just drinks no food.
He just drinks no food.
He just drinks no food. He just drinks no food. He just drinks no food. He just drinks no food. He just drinks no food. He just drinks no food. Single drinks that she will have one and you will have. And that's a rat. Don't worry, water's on me.
I've paid for dates.
You found a date.
But was it an initial date or was it like a few down?
The initial date we went to Soho House.
Oh, just a little bit frightening.
They don't even take debit there, girl.
I'm not going to go back to the hotel.
She's a fan mode away.
She swiped your card on the way in.
She demoed the balt're caught on the way in
We had a lot of drinks so I paid for some of the drinks, but he paid for all the food Okay, we had a lot of drinks like so I was like I feel like drinking drink
I feel like how much was that 10 how much was it? Wait, we all say in drinking drinking how many drinks?
Yeah, how much is the 10 because to a guy I'm thinking for that's like damn, I wasn't a lot, but you'll be like nine. Yeah, we had about like six six or okay, okay
What you get to eat I need to make sure that he look good. So I was like, okay, so you put on a beer goddess
Listen to guy who's got like a so-called house membership. He ain't gonna look that good
How do you mean to send it you just someone just ripped the name membership card
good dammit
she said don't get a debit
I got a so-ho-house membership this isn't good enough
nothing worse for me is like I'm sick of it
I am sick of it
got a library card it's no good
maybe not sick of it
she could say books and what
books and what
no you read and they go oh god I'm you don't have a candle damn
Book was good you know I'm audio nigga my books read to me
Jesus Oh, Jesus. I love my friend. I'm so sorry. I'm so dumb. I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
And I love you at the same time.
Oh, man.
This is, this is, this is so far.
All right.
So, Sid, you got to get out of here?
Yeah, I got to go.
We've been going for it.
Now, tell me, grab it right now.
Let's wrap this thing up right now.
All right.
Thank you for listening.
Let's do all the plugs and all that.
We'll go around, Sid.
What do you got going on?
I have a monthly show called The Warm Up at Carmel Lounge. Every second Saturday, the next show is March 11th.
It's super packed so get there early, start set eight o'clock so you should come at 730.
I have a one woman show called Death of a Bottle Girl. It's gonna be in April.
Nice.
Ninth maybe, but I'll let you know.
Yeah, just follow her, adjusts her adjusted NYC on a Twitter and
Instagram and all that yep fall information stay in touch with sit. Thank you so much
All right John what you got going on baby, um hustlin man. I'm hustlin. We torn. I'm downstairs at the Sella Yacht
And catch me down there for five days a week
Web series coming out. Oh, all of it down there for five days a week web series coming out
I love it all of it's on my my web series man the tour dates everything's on my on my Instagram. So hit me on the gram
He was funny. Yeah, I want to say one more time about John man
I was like one my happiest moments of like being a a fandom near a comedy
Everything was seeing you on that comedy seller list.
Oh man.
One of the favorite things I've ever seen
was like seeing you.
Thank you man.
Yeah, most deserved man.
I appreciate that.
I appreciate that.
John is out here, he's a beast, you gotta go see him live,
make sure to follow his Instagram, you always got great content
and he's a fucking beast on stage.
Looking forward to the web series and all that man.
Oh thank you man.
Gordon what you got?
A, I got the Decepticomix tour coming up in April. Uh-huh. Doin' about 25 cities. Yes, 25 25 25
25 different cities check out Decepticomix.com backslash tour. Uh-huh for all the dates also if you
In the Jersey area I run the big 10 comedy show I stress factory and if you have feel like coming down to
Nork to see some funny I albeit hell's-kitchen lounge
in North New Jersey.
So come on down to the bricks.
Well, clapping up for Gordon.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right, guys, we're going to go around.
Do you got anything to plug on the couch real quick?
Sure.
Yeah, I'm a musician.
Check out the whitest band of all time.
The.
OK.
At the name.
Yeah, I'm the head of the neck.
Hold on, hold on. I don't know if you can plug this on this one. Oh this episode you might to come back next week
I don't know it's a pro wrestling theme rock
Called American party machines to check that out
Okay, we're gonna find it American party machine on Facebook
Instagram anything. Yeah, okay, and you have any you have anything you want to put out there?
Nothing blaring okay cool go
I've ever think that American party
Oh, I'm like a good time. We'll do I guess we should we should do ours and you got you guys got Bobby's
Yeah, okay, do we have anything to chat though?
I don't think we really have anything in a chat. I mean we just got some slack on it
Lauren, not too much like some Icom is yeah, just like somebody said look at these poor man's ludicrous Kevin Hart and John legends
Wait, wait, wait, which one was that
Somebody else said you should call it you know what up brother
Yeah, just Bob just why I said because it wasn't like it all
Brandon go ahead all right y'all can follow me in American comments American comments.com
Check out comedy outliers monthly show at Sean's bar and kitchen next show Saturday March 25th
It's gonna be dope comedy outliers.com and just follow everything we do them, man. Thank you Hold on my hold on my Brandon don't stop don't stop, you love movies, right? Yeah, yeah, go back go back to Brandon
Yeah, yeah, you just writing shots now
I'm trying to help you because you alien to be back to me. I can't plug it. All right, so yeah, yeah
I love movies check on beating a popcorn podcast as well and nico spoil movies with my boy Justin Brown no relation to Mike Brown
You don't know that
But uh check that out if you love movie talking all that stuff
But uh again comedy outliers next show starting March 25th if you like what Mike and I did on the show you know come see us live all that shit and
Bet the money. Yeah clap it up for Brandon Collins.
Brandon's for our brother and arms and a shit man.
Alright, and me Mike Brown. I'm a member of the Decepticomics which Gordon plug and I'm a member of comedy outliers
Which Brandon plugs so I'm not gonna do too many plugs but just find me on all your social at Yo Mike Brown.
Thank you for having me.
Bobby, you're the best.
And we go clapping for myself.
Thanks, all right.
And now, I want to run down.
Well, Bobby got going on.
So we can do some more.
Sure.
People can see Bobby at March 2nd, 3rd and 4th
at comedy club on State and Mass in Wisconsin.
On the 31st, he will be at Benanas and Harrisburg, Hykes, New Jersey Wisconsin. On the 31st he will be at bananas and Harrisburg High School New Jersey.
On April 1st he will be at the same place as bananas and
Harrisburg High School New Jersey. I'm sorry I'm kind of drunk right now.
And uh...
Yeah, too beer!
Deep real drunk!
You got your littleness at that.
Uh...
April 6th, 7th and 8th.
He will be at comics at Mojigan's son in Uncusville, Connecticut.
And 27th, 20th and 29th of he will be at comics at Mahiga and son in Unkasville, Connecticut, and
27th, 28th and 29th of April he will be at Akmi comedy company in Manapolis, Minnesota, follow him at Robert Kelly Live dot com. Follow me at R2 Deepu
That's such a great name. Thanks dude. I appreciate it. That's my handle. You're a cycle path, but that's a degree
And I'm actually to be at Stent doing stand-up at Solo House tonight. So if you're watching live you can check that out nice Yeah, you better throw that shot. Shino Hagan show, right? Is that the one you want to know?
He no, she just went to Soho House to get on the stage
Soo-Hawaiows, you want to know comedy?
I'm real out here. Hopefully I can meet a man there too
Deep in that's what you need for stage time now you just taking a
Hey
Deep enough that's what you need for stage time that you're just taking ass
I blow but I blow the solitude on the sub
Yeah, and March 7th I'll be at March 7th. I'll be at Greenwichville County Club doing a little time and yeah, I'm around Let's clap it up for deep
I'll hear workin man proud of you Lauren workin man. Proud of you Lauren Lauren. You got anything you want to out Lauren Kubair
You could follow me there and thank you so much guys guys. It's awesome. Yeah, I'm for the
Holding down I know the best man. Yeah, no one the best man. I love very many white people
Yeah, I'm playing a game all that stuff. I'm I'm very excited
I'm playing a game. What's that? What's that the one that said, right? Okay, five. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Wait, those are the two black romantic films.
Okay, well, wait, we're talking about this after show.
Let's not open this can up right now.
We're not ready.
We're not ready.
Wait, what did you say?
What other ones do you know?
All of them.
I just want to tell you something.
I'll just want to tell you something.
I'll just want to tell you something.
I'll just want to tell you something.
I'll just want to tell you something.
See if you had anything.
She said a little bit of basketball.
Which tonight, okay. Okay, okay. Thank you guys. I'm trying to close it out. Thank you guys for listening. I'm sorry. I just want to make sure to listen to all the other shows on ridecat
Rikas.com. You guys have been great and also remember to go to blue aprint.com
Backslash dude and get some food y'all. Hey, tell me the black people sent you. Oh god for blight blight Breanna. Why why. Oh, you know what's it?
You've been listening to the YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening.
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