Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - VIDEO: Yankee Swap 2017

Episode Date: December 21, 2017

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Make people feel like they're not The only one that's not a fucking douchebag take these up soda We're here Was this the one that he lost a shin on his that one but they punched this one and he threw the headphones on that one All right, before we get into that, some subtext that you just brought up, we're here, the YKWD, the very special Christmas episode. We have the regulars, AKA the Trinity as they're calling you fucking assholes. Oh, that's fun.

But that means carrots, onions and celery. Hey, I'm carrots. I'm salary Camic and Camic a seller and onion kick. Tell you that much Well, you can take a bomb down. Oh Start off hard bitch. You do you start off hard. I didn't even know what it meant We got very special these today's Yankee swap day Created by Joe list and And my other creation, Rose Thorn Sea. What is that?

That was a bit wild. That was terrible. Rose Thorn Sea. We needed two years ago. That was like Joe did a great album with Yankee Swap. We followed it with a shit one with Rose Thorn Sea. Yeah, that's a good one. But I like it.

It's like Meat Love's second album. The album is called, Are You Mell-Me? It's a little fun. All right, here's the deal. Let's go through this real quick. We got special guests coming in today. I like but I like it's like meatloaf second album All right, here's a deal. Let's go through this real quick. We got special guests coming in today Very special guests for I got a special guest the Lewis for me. I got a spit. I don't know if you're gonna like it I hate it, but it's it's from your past What oh someone's getting nervous. Oh, maybe I'm just screaming nervous together Oh someone's getting nervous. Oh, maybe I'm just screaming nervous No, it's not big hey, hey, is it a

No Costoka no, I just miss it We got of course Chris Copo was back for the first time He's got his code of norine fired beer. I know. My WKWD breakup beard. Yeah. He's like, hey, Bobby, this came about a picture. We didn't break up. We just became friends.

We did break up. We did. We just friends. Yeah, we're just friends. Look at you do, you do look like after sitcom face. Right after like eight years on a show. It's like I wrote a letterman look. Yeah, I wrote a motorcycle up the West Coast.

I'm just fun, fun and life. Did you start it in my own business, man? I got two restaurants in Santa Monica. I don't miss it. Do I miss it? No, really? That's great news. Yeah.

We got perfect L face. Ha. Oh, yeah. What? I want to be a dentist. Oh my God. It looks like a Christmas card. On the screen, it looks like a Christmas card. Can I see? I'm Santa St.A. Oh my god. It looks like a Christmas card. On the screen it looks like a Christmas card.

Can I see? I'm Santa St. Aaron Elf. So we got a two in word play on Santa. He's like just make the fucking toys. Just beard, tastes like an old lady's vagina. I don't know where this has been for the last year. I will buy that beard off you right now. We got Joe list of course, aka.

Joe West, bro, bro, bro. Hey, why aren't any of us the Trinity in the fucking intro? Yeah, yeah, first of all, there's no rule what Pogas is That's that's Janus Pobbus. What that was Janus Pobbus? Yeah, Janus Pobbus and Joe fucking Derosa the two least likable people And Andy Schumer and Schumer Yeah, that bitch you called me Hollywood. That's a Hollywood move

Bob Bob Collins Bob is a star fucker That's really kind of hurtful and I we're laugh. We have some yaks here Go Jewish words in but that's not Jewish yuck. That's totally That's your audience fucking Sorry to describe Jewish women. Oh shit I love a nice thick breasted Jewish like gal. What? Yuck

Hey, did you lose weight? I don't know am I do I look sick you look thin? You can't tell him he looks thin. He'll be freaking out for the rest of the day You look sure you look thin like gaunt tell him he looks then it'll be freaking out for the rest of the day You look you look thin like gaunt. Yeah, like that at all Yeah, you do you look a little thing you look like one of your fingers There's some going on here that wasn't even a real attempt at a joke you're trying to get this bomb down at what happened There's something going on here that wasn't even a real attempt at a joke you're trying to get this bomb down What happened? What's going on? I tried to send it to it. I'm into it. He wants to wipe the old ladies Put it up his face. My new thing. Jesus Christ. All right, we get Dan Soda aka Monster voice aka corporate Dan aka fucking Michael rap reports stole my aka thing. He did no he does it too. Oh

Why is the middle my my tongue numb? Oh, he's cool. Why is the middle of my tongue numb? You shouldn't be licking that. That was probably made in a fucking factory in China. I can't help it. It goes in my mind. Pull it down. This girl has been hiding cocaine in that period.

You look young with this thing. You look like a young little kid. That's because it's stretching my fat on my face back to my ears like Joe Pesciano Casino. Yeah. Fuck, ha, ha, ha. And next speaking of bombs, we have a terrorist face. I am the bomb, you're right.

We have my- Oh! There you go. Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun Boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom Corn and it's that he stole off a young boy most likely I was in the theater so I can't be a character witness Hey kid camea you nachos my friend dance hungry. I'm gonna punch you in the phrase give me your sorrow about kids He's on millions. I make good money. I bought those nachos. Thanks. Well, I'll still thanks to the sorrow of my kids I make good money, but he sits down. No people make good money. Don't say they make good money. They just make it They said they're doing well the un-oiled wheel squeaks the loudest Dan The early worm catches the fish done

You can lead a horse to water and you can't watch a quiet movie with Louis J. Gomez eating next to you I like it you call it a serious movie it's about aliens talking Dan is dumb Dan is dumb Dan is dumb Well with the aliens over lords come I hope they take Joe first. Yeah fucking problem. Yeah, yep right there We're just really liberally Chris that was fairly a joke that was just a great movie though fact okay, so it was a good table. I didn't get it

What the hell is they're talking. I don't get it. You know, speak something on white Manchester by the scene that's a good movie if you see You know what we're doing. You don't speak except to go on white. I'm going to say what Joe's girlfriend has said a lot. You're a drama queen. What do you mean? You used to queen your drama. It's a good movie. It's not a good movie. I heard it is actually. Why you don't like it?

I don't mean to corporate damage. You want to take a fucking mystic rivers and mystic that and you Can't have the child. This is I need the child. What is it? This isn't what about this isn't the dentist Let's go to fucking rivers on fire. Ma you're referring to Dennis Lane books translated into film My least favorite fucking movies what what you talking books first then movies. That's a lot of you mean every movie ever made But what what yes name a movie Ocean's 13 book you think ocean's 13 was a book you This third it was one two

You know just started 13 you fucking it in it you do the best book club What's the movie name again? Manchester by the sea. It's a town. I know where it is. My uncle was the fucking, uh, the male guy there. It's about him. What? Yeah.

I wasn't. He didn't fucking give me a pie. You don't want to see who that casted as you. We have a very special. Bobby, hold on. Why aren't you giving us all parts in your new fucking TV show about your life? My, uh, we got a very special guest coming in, uh, today, uh, that I hope you enjoy. Okay. Uh. He is

One of my favorite people in the world. Can you tell my friend to get ready? I don't like him. I don't already Whoever is I'm gonna hit. I don't like him. I hope you do. I hope you get I'm gonna hit this person. I hope you get that car. They're getting punched in the fucking face. I hope no matter who walks to that car Okay, fuck whoever It's Matt Sarah It's Kelly it's Kelly it's

She always met Sarah by 40 pounds. Jesus Christ. The beard threw me. Take all the coats off. Kelly, put your stuff down. Put your, put your, take your apron off. I'm sorry. Kelly, go sit over here. Kelly, for Stokers, we got you into the crew back. Hi, baby. Oh, scoped your stick. We got you That's so fat. I think we have to remember that this is a program, not just a hang. No. I'm barely eating.

You're okay. We're screaming. You didn't listen to the intro. It's just a comment. And there's no rules. I have no rules. I've got no rules. You make me change somebody's life right?

Yeah, you never know. I'm afraid this is going to be one of those scenes where Kelly gives out how she has taken revenge over us in the past nine months. Well, we have another special guest. I should also say for all the audio listeners, Kelly is your shoving candy cans into her mouth right now. It's pretty crazy. We have another special guest.

There's no more. Everybody will love, and if you don't love, I'm gonna punch them in the face. You're a piece of shit. It is a guy this time, very special person. It's an auto person. Yeah, that's what I did. I got a retarded person to come on to you make fun of How was there open Anthony did it for years dude? That's a whole thing. I did it for years too. You were on my show

Mentally challenged I'm You do too Oh I'm very little how close are we? What? God, she's so much harder than Kelly you really upgraded live really level you skip like four No, I there's a contract now if she gains ten pounds out nice She has to be as light as deep who at all times it looks like she's the Hollywood cast and Kelly's the person in the real story

Would be scopo Who's the real scope or the the Hallie would play the real scope oh no bird would be you bird be soda. Oh, thanks We'd have to get we have to step in a movie Oh, thanks. We'd have to get we have to step in. No, be me. Lou, uh, Goosmone. No, no, no, we'd have to get who's it all there. Far get like a who's the angel? No, we get George Lopez.

We get angel. Salos are like that. Look at dice to play me. Why? Why? I don't know. Because I don't say this. I like that casting choice.

Yeah. You do. Luring rattlesnake. First of all, producers, we're going to have to be me. Steeb, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,

Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh rick and waddles take the show. Oh, I enjoy the show without me Why my thorn just happened? Fucking great actor on cue set. You shut up. Steve. Thank you John cue sack. I can I can't do a lot. You have Q-SAC from here up. I'm not wearing the hat.

Yeah, you are. No, buddy, you have to wear the hat. I'm wearing a beard in the hat. Are you doing reservoir dogs? No. Hey, you got to be a shemi. Shemi. Why?

He's great actor. He's known for his bad mouth. You're so are you. Joe is a bad mouth. Joe is a bad mouth. Joe is a bad mouth. Joe is a bad mouth. Joe is a bad mouth. Joe is a bad mouth. That's the only party that looks like Bishammi. Dude, let me tell you something. First of all, you have a nice mouth. It's different. It stands out. Yeah, special. Do me a favor. Open this candy cane with one of those fact. I'm kidding. Listen, you're a cutie. You have

John Cusack heir. How's that? Let me move on. All right, let's move on. Yeah, you have a nice mouth joke. Thanks. Let me see it. I'd rather not. Let me give me a kiss. Sorry, there's great jokes coming out of it right now.

That's usual. Let's talk about Kelly's weight. No, I'm kidding. She looks better than she did when she first came back. She got so fat that it was uncomfortable to make fat jokes about her. And now I'm completely cool with it. She's a pig again. She's down to a pig again.

It's great. Merry Christmas, everybody. I love, let me tell you what Kelly gets when she gets chubby. Titties. Awesome, titties. She's got diner waitress tits. I mean, those are fucking, gee, I mean, they're so nice. She has good in a shirt, titties.

What do you mean? What? You got sparking. What do you mean? What if you take him out what happens? If you take him it's like if you hit an airbag on a car the whole room Where is that there's a laugh from her? She's trying to get more job. She's gonna laugh at everybody but she's a cackling maniac. I got a laugh on the couch I I got a laugh on Kelly You got to laugh from these fucking really. Yeah, they're professional comedians I saw this I can make him I could draw a fucking thumb puppet. He'd fucking giggle How are we doing ready? I we're ready

Everybody everybody Lauren you sit down I love that we don't have a microphone for whoever this is Lauren, where is the special one was can't Lauren. Lauren wait wait. Don't invite him in yet Jimi's camera already hasn't make it Stop yelling wait people are self conscious. Can we put I want camera five turned on him when he comes in Undertaker all right ready and Everybody I need I need a nice Christmas song for this next guest. Have you? No, no, no, no.

Hop a little more. Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way. Oh, what fun is your ride on the way? So we'll set it close. It's a happy Christmas song. Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way. Hey, Santa! Hey, Santa! Santa's here, everybody! The tour call. Santa's got presents for everybody!

All the animals! Santa's here, everybody! Santa's got presents for everybody! All the animals! Santa's here, everybody! Santa's got presents for everybody! All the animals! Santa's here, everybody!

All the animals! Santa's here, everybody! Santa's here, everybody! Santa's got presents for everybody! All the animals! Santa's got presents for everybody! All the animals! Santa's got presents for everybody!

All the animals! All the animals! All the animals! All the animals! All the animals! All the animals! All the animals! All the animals! Joe no, no, you don't just teeth are gonna get all caught up in that girl. Yeah, push you have little league mouth You need bigger ones Lewis really needs those Hey, oh lay shoes. I don't know what battery is. I don't know what battery is. I don't know what battery is.

I don't know what battery is. I'll tell you. You put those in scope also you get the personality. What's that? What's that? What's that? What's that? That's for him.

That's for him. Oh, him and him. Come, give something. Give something to scope. I get the fucking big lead shoe. Well, he gave that to me really, but that's good. You have that. You take it. I hate how Tim Dylan asked me involved in everything in the industry.

Just lie. Everything. He's not Tim Dylan. That's Santa Claus. I mean, how he is. What do you mean Santa Claus is that? That's Santa Claus. That's Santa.

Dude, Santa Claus is sweating. He's on Grindr. I need this. I need this. In his defense, in the story of St. Nick, he is a gay Republican from Long Island. Do you tell he popped out one cuz he's fat. Oh, what is that a close swiping on grander right now? Looks like Asian boys have been extra nice this year This is the worst fucking suit ever. But I thought, listen, I'm a nice beard.

I'm a fucking green hop. I suck. The fucking guy working on the building goes, this is a Halloween suit. He said, first of all, I bought, I fucked up. I bought a very expensive suit for him. Three X. I had it. I left it. I left it in my car.

I thought it was candy. So we had to run out and. He didn't even get this. He's on it at Ricky's. He's like a Santa. Santa. Santa. You have sexy Santa. But it looks like when the Grinch He thought it was candy mom. So we had to run out and we even get this. He's on it at Ricky's. He's like a Santa. Santa.

Santa. You have sexy Santa. But it looks like when the Grinch dresses up as Santa, it's a little frown across the park. It looks like the bottom of like the skirt of a tree and it's in here. Put it on. I have my gift and my pants for everyone.

You know, I don't mean that. I mean, it's for that thing. You get that. That's all. It really doesn't fit at all looks like a bad I said because this looks like a Halloween Santa. Are you hot? Yeah, I didn't great. Okay, great. Hey, well Well, we'll keep it off for a little bit. All right. Thank you for coming Santa. Oh, thank you It's how's the how's the North Pole? It's well, it's we moved it to a lepo. He loves Paul

Actually, not great. It's not good. Really. Yeah, it's pretty rough. Oh, that's good. How's the how's the reindeer going? It's been killed. It's in a leopards. It's a new Christmas carol being written as we speak. How's the wife? Uh, she's okay. You know we cut her clip off. What's his name? Oh, it's pretty progressive. What is that mean? He's a gay his gay Santa's gay scope is not gay 1000% It doesn't have a sexuality that's true. He's asexual. Yeah, so anyways, we're gonna start this off today We have we're gonna look at the video from the

Misery loves company talk about that a little bit, but we're going to start out with our game. First of all, uh, what is this? I forget it. Thorn and the rose thorn. No, you're the gifts first. No, we're going to do it. We're going to get close the show. Second hand.

No, no, no, that's close to the show. To what? The thorn rose. All right. So we'll do that after. Yeah, do the gifts first. Lewis is trying to put it off and get us to forget about it. No, it's not.

Why you don't like it? No. Why? It's fine. It's just we should do the gift first Lewis is trying to put it off and get us to forget about it. No, sorry. You don't like it? No. Why? It's fine. It's just we should do the get first. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. And why did you make your hat? Your your elf hat into a regular hat. Oh, look what I got guys. We got some snacky pool. Oh, you get a food up here. It's all for Tim. No rule today. Just today. No rules You know put it right in front everybody grab a little bit Santa's payment put the Saraje wings in front of me though You have Saraje wings. Where's the Saraje's? I Wish I would like to I'm sure that's what Santa's like at every restaurant. You're like he sucks to wait on

Santa Claus is demanding when he sits in your section. Oh my god. Yeah, hot as fuck your hot as fuck guys You're the best Liz I'm gonna grab a surround you miss that. It's like Get a fry I really hope you did just slowly plan revenge on all three of our all-for-us I'm still the answer to it because you're all fucking eating. And because you're talking. What? Copaine, yeah. Yeah. Jungle Boogey, Billy and Billy, Jungle Boogey.

Get over with the bogey. So we had this thing. Get over with the bogey. We had what is fucking, how you doing? A new podcast? Well, you know what? You're fucking shoving food into your face you fucking fat Santa Oh, I think you need to settle down before I throw this fucking wing ready. I fucking know There's no more fuck no So this thing happened this weekend You look like a surfer Santa.

So this thing happened this weekend. We all saw the video, right? You guys just wanted to happen on Monday? We have napkins, buddy. I hope someone got fucking riddle in in their fucking gifts. Let me ask, can we focus? All right, we're focusing. I'm focusing.

All right, ready? Everybody saw the video, correct? Which video? Misery Loves Company. Yes. Jimmy Martinez almost beat the fuck out of Kevin Brennan. Which is shocking. Yeah.

Why not shocking? It was sarcastic. Oh, I honestly didn't get it. Jimmy Martinez is a large man. Yeah, big guy. Big guy. Not someone to fuck with. Fucking pussy.

I'll say it. Whoa. What's going on? Jimmy, you hear that? Come at me, motherfucker. Come at me like that, bitch. Okay, Jimmy's a good friend of hear that come at me motherfucker come at me like that bitch Okay, Jimmy's good friend of mine. He's on please Edit that video and treat it before Legion of skanks tonight. I know bitch has made nigger, bro

What are they? Why did you please edit it the sorry out of the back? That's what I say it just put that on Twitter, so it looks like You think you could take Jimmy Martinez? I came down to it We really came down brass tax No, I can fight the 30 seconds the fuck up bro. You fight the 30 seconds, bro. You bitch the fuck up I dare you So fast fucking the body story Fast fucking the body story I'll take fucking max is fucking chalkboard from his wall take everything This paint what it's painted on the wall

Anyway, I love watching you guys threaten each other eating wings Hey, that's a good gift. I know what I'm holding on to this now cuz you guys You're a dad of what I love that all of everyone relax everyone relax. You'll remain what you're a gay one To miss a 10 million you love man's penis and bots and butts. You're not so good at nipples. You suck around the balls. You want to fuck 455 men with only one. This is the jolly is hate crime. I've ever witnessed. It's so. Don't worry, don't worry, I'm Christmas. Christmas Can't take that Christian on Dylan the Republican homosexual I just had a very shiny dick You would even say it would make you sick with it because it's gay To real to real okay

That's what it gets True real to real okay The facts look at the stats fine Bobby you want me to be realized you'll be a fake Astrid Tim Dill doesn't have AIDS What what this fucking 85? I didn't have an age for it. I think age jokes are funny. They're great. They're not funny They're good That's why it's funny nobody's dying of it It's only funny when you get really died from it. No, it's hilarious now that you see that did you see that Sasha and back home movie the new one no, we just spy nobody seen. I'm gonna ruin if everybody so spoiler alert

I think he ruined it for everybody the guy There's a little boy with no wheelchair with a And he gets shot and the blood goes flying by everybody and the kid the guy from who's the kid from Harry Potter what's his name the the Actor Daniel Daniel Rackliffe Deanna Rackliffe it goes in his mouth And the next thing is new Daniel Rackliffe has contracted AIDS. That's right. That was pretty funny. Yeah. Oh nice nice mouth open. It's a funny. I just funny So you guys saw this video, man of of this of this craziness the

We're calling in this studio the riot cast incident. I thought you're gonna kill him. Oh me almost breaking this what? We nuts Jimmy literally just put his dick on the table and rub it across it every day and Bobby wants a shit. You're out of your fucking mind. I don't, I like Jimmy. Me and him and my friends for a long time. I really like Jimmy a lot.

Um, look, if you listen to the podcast, there was a lot of crazy shit. It was a crazy show. It was, I mean, nobody was fucking listening to anybody and it was just out of the gate. Everybody just trying to do their own fucking thing. But then that fucking call, he calls him up. He calls Jason Steinberg up. It's so funny to fucking Jason. It's his client.

Yeah. Just be his manager. Just say no, he's doing great. You don't fucking tell you don't know. Well, you audition some what the fuck I didn't see I only watch the clip of the fight so I don't have any context of what happened before that we're gonna pull it up right now You're gonna break it down like a John madden Santa. What? That's right dude. Let's not where's deep put it at the

Joe you got you know Dude let's not where's deep with it? I the Joe you got y'all's cute. I'm laughing about it. Fine. Damn see what I what I was listen here's a deal Bobby is he's most funny when he's not trying to be funny. He tries and kind of do really I just ruined it. Yeah, I want a French fry.

You different so bad it's Christmas. It's not a car. It's a potato. It's a different thing. It's a natural. It's a different. Don't give them a lot. He's gonna look at it. If it it grows you get it. It's true. It's not Brad Bobby. It's a different 25 pounds man, you gotta be careful. Yeah, you got you get me happy

My life I'm happy Tim why are you blotchy are you nervous? No, it's just I don't know if it's fucking time when he's had off Yeah, I have a disgusting suit on I have a Building insulation It's horrible All right, I'm fine. All right. Take that off gross Just leave the other thing on I thought you had a nice suit. I was excited buddy. I did I fucked up I left it in the garage uptown did your nice next year. I'll have a nice that will have a

Hopefully next year I won't be playing Santa, but why well because it's demoralizing why is Santa demoral a big role Dude that's the biggest role of the fucking night. Yeah, fuck you know I could have stopped roast could have came in and bitch and Santa Jesus root off Mrs. Claus. Yeah fucking Donner Pam Anderson Die hard. Who's more valuable on Christmas Jesus or Santa? Santa. It's Jesus's birthday. So I would say Santa's birthday It's Jesus's birthday. It's Santa's birthday It was when Jesus got let go from the Jews buddy. It's Jesus's birthday

Jesus It's Jesus's birthday Be let him go. He's fired him. He fired him from life. They caught him. Hey From like flat face elf. I don't believe it. I work for Santa You can't hurt my feelings. You can't I have magical powers. Why are you hacking his awesome little? We're doing it. We're doing to do it. I don't like it to do it. Doing doing doing getting ready things If you let him fucking do his thing it was fun and then you ruined it with your half-ass one Don't push the microwave. I was just kidding. I'm sorry. I'm size. I just want my voice is to bring joy What you're talking skim milk skim milk the skim milk guy with Bobcat friends You look at Kelly's face and then look at Lawrence face. That's unbelievable. What Kelly might be now

I was gonna see she might be pretty other Lauren, but look nope. Kelly is cute or chubby. Oh Not cute or the Lauren though. Well, there's only one way to go Perfect if she didn't have those thin lips in that moon shape face. She's perfect What's a moon shape face a crescent? That pull up a lucky charms? One of the lucky she's a lucky I have a lot of charms as her face. I could have a face I call it like make moon from Bobby none of us are gonna make it big. That's my face. That's what I said

Change gifts Fucking sick We're gonna do this one Fucking sick I was gonna look at the value of what Bobby has in his hands I ready let's go now here's the video where we just reenacted be better You can't even brighten I'll be James It's Kevin Brandon We got one of your clients here. Stay right there. First of all, poor Jason Stein. Jason's been through the

ringer. He was the bump man. And now it's like he's finally getting some he's got some acting clients. He's doing good. And he gets a call from he's like, you can hear, hey man, hey cab, you can hear the sadness in his voice about what, because he knows some horse shit's about to happen. Does it like you woke up? Oh, or he was just embedded in the woke up. I'm trying, it's like more like an intervention, because yo, yo, my man, you got to ask someone question.

We're not gonna play these fucking games Right there. I'd stop. Okay cool bit is over Do the podcast yeah Jimmy you need a drink you Do you want me to edit that whole thing? Oh? My god my phone's on I am so sorry So he decided to call Jimmy's manager. Yeah, what's going on? I don't get it. He says not working I'm still with this food in your mouth. I don't get so many emails about that so eating There's a deal you like my chewed down. I'm tuned for you

He questioned He questioned Jimmy. Oh, you got it. Yeah. You should, first of all, Lauren, you should never say, oh. It looks like, it looks like Kaleesi let herself go. I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say, those jaws during those tubes. I'm like, oh, Karen, what a happy with my skin. Dragons don't care what I look like. I'm a mom.

I have free dragons. It's hard to maintain. That was so good I want to fry. I'm having... Don't die. If he dies on the podcast. It's so worth it. I really mean that. I hope you're so upset, but the story of Bobby Kelly choking

definitely on his own podcast. It's all fucking... To watch Tim dump his body out of his chair and then sit in his seat. If you're not watching him in video, Bobby reached for another wing while choking. Literally choking and reaching for food. Sometimes they get the food down, you gotta put them on the food in.

It's a trash compact. It just floods the body. You know quick, you know quick lose and pull out a fucking gas digitals sticker and put it over that arm. It's my territory, I've climbed it. I'm here for gas digitals. It's a rubble. Yeah, nice.

All right, so what happened was that might have been our fastest fizzle out of a bit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was one of the funny things Lewis ever said by the way. Holy shit. He was questioning Jimmy's fucking acting.

Jimmy said he was acting and doing a bunch of stuff. And the acting world and auditioning and getting part. Well, he's not working in the Matrix. Right, so go ahead, right? The Matrix. No, like the movie. I read it. Jimmy Martinez, he's one of your clients, right?

Is he working today? Yeah. No, Axie, what do you mean? Axie, you say you got a job, where you work with? No, I don't fucking work in the matrix. I'm working in Hollywood, nigga. Oh, stop, right there. Stop playing.

Stop. Wow. I'm out. I'm done right there. Hey, Jim, hey, buddy, what's up? You've never been to Black Hollywood? That's a lot of fun. Do they call it the matrix?

What does that mean? You guys know what that means? That means a big society. Oh really? Day job. Now working the matrix nigga. That's such a cool way of saying I don't have a day. Oh man. I wish I would have thought of the thing. I want to say again. What's your name again? Scopo. Okay. This thing is not funny. Scopo. But shit on scopo through Jimmy Martinez voice. So are you here, nigga? You do a great. Yeah. I see this. All right. Ready?

here, niggle. You do a great. Yeah. I see this. All right, ready? Okay, I'm dead serious, bro. I'm serious, too. What? What's it? When somebody says bra, seriously, like, I'm kidding. Stop unless yeah, let's say if a guy goes bra, bra, and it doesn't have blonde hair and a goofy hat, dude, I'm telling you right now, bro. Yeah, I like the what you're saying. And I think we should go get some fish talkers. Niggas, I do not work in the matrix.

Do you not work in the matrix? I'm not plugged in, bro. Yeah, let's just ride. Do you fucking shut the fuck up? What if they're like, um, hey, Bobby, what do you want for Christmas? And you're like a bra. Oh, to take joke.

No, I got it. I just like Joe's face was great after he's here. Cause he was the delight that he took. Bro. I got it. I just like Joe's face was great after a six. He was the delight that he took. Did you think it should have got more? I think it was about accurate. I thought it was good. I thought it was good too.

I just it was about my tits so I didn't laugh. Go ahead more. Park as. Hang on one second. One second. What do you need? Where is the bomb? Get off the phone! Where is the bomb? Get off the phone. Where is the bomb?

Oh, Bobby. Oh, Bobby. Oh, it's not. Kelly's becoming one of my head. It's seen a jersey. It's coming. I said it's becoming one. What's it called? What are they called when you become a mom with the machines? No, it's the matrix. I am the matrix. No, it's the matrix. I am the matrix. You just write a joke live. How do you do it? What are you? Bobby, can you trip for the fassaurus behind you? And you're looking for a synonym of blind with and or to become singularity. Singularity.

Singularity is happening. It's happening right now. I'm in the bomb here. No, Lewis. Lewis. I love Tim. He's like the fly. Help me. Oh, should you meet that bandana? That's funny somehow. The Tim went, that's right. Hi, God. That's right. I got He said he's working in Hollywood. Where's he? He actually questioned the question. You're not going to win.

Yeah, but is he working in? Why is it not going on the screen? Huh? Do you ask me to hit a button? Okay, no, I have to pay. You need a third person. Who is the blonde? Wait, I got a deep point. Wait, why didn't you scream at her for that?

If I did that, you would have screamed at me. Because first of all, she looks like that. She's double. Bubbie, she's double. Listen, I was like, something. She looks like that. She's really stepped it up since she left.

Okay, please don't let's not open this can of worms Please do like welcome back Okay, okay, and I've been helping and she has nice tits the ghost of Kelly take them out I'll do it for you, darling. I like Kelly's back Kelly's back I like when Bobby yells it makes me feel wonderful and tickly Can you do it Kelly you do it Kelly Kelly Kelly Kelly stomach Kelly stomach

Jimmy's got baggage he got fired high 97 he talks a lot of shit like he's got the game figured out he's gambling all He's gambling all weekend So fuck all that nigga That shit don't affect me when I go into these auditions and I'm on set in all that I'll tell you right now fucking Jimmy is a good actor Yes, he's a fucking good. So he's a fucking talented dude like he really can engage a crowd of white people white people Fucking love him Jimmy has listen Jimmy has something about him. Yeah, he's got something that thing and he's like Maybe he's the murder on your poster dog shows.

Yeah, dude, he's a murder. He's close everybody would run the light by like a half an hour. I mean, he didn't fucking the truth is he didn't want to play that game. So he got a lot further in the comedy world. Right. But he burnt somebody bridges. People don't want to like fucking work him with their clubs. Well, this is, look, when you can't control yourself when you, but we'll get to that. But I have the same problem Jimmy has. And you do,

too, I think, where we have to binge eating disorder, huh? What? binge eating disorder. Oh, yeah, no matter what you get them in, and come on, carry on. You know what, you get itching cream. No, I need it to throw it. No, I need this. I need to throw it out. Can we please exchange gifts? Lauren just fought Bobby for the entire Hold on don't throw that I need that I'm grabbing the show today is just point out physical Okay, so what what is Jason? You know he's not sleeping these gambler all week and then he's going out no sleep on a Monday and auditioning I'm not puking you on your outbitch. You're like, that's a group that's fucking.

Here's a problem. Kevin's playing a different game, right? Kevin's on a podcast. Fucking being the alpha on a podcast. Jimmy, I'm not puking you on your outbitch. I'm just puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch.

I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch.

I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on your outbitch. I'm puking you on calling you out bitch. You're like that's a group that's fucking here's a problem Kevin's playing a different game, right? Kevin's on a podcast fucking being the alpha on a podcast Jimmy Stopping on a podcast five minutes ago Dude in life five minutes ago Some of them are playing a different game when that when Jimmy goes up not playing man

That's it. He's not you're if Tim said it. I'd be like, how about you still playing he'd be like all right I am yeah, Bobby the first time I did Bobby's podcast, this is exactly what happened. Bobby said I'm not in the matrix and then beat the shit out of it. But I've been coming back because, you know, it was kind of fun. He loves it. No, but I had that at a comedy show once where I fucking, you know, there's a dude that was heckling me.

It wasn't even heckling like, there's being asked to just kept on calling shit out. So at one point, I was like, okay, well, I'm just not a comic anymore. I'm so dude You're like you're just calling me a bitch in front of a room full of people and you're just gonna punk me over and over again So I'll drop the microphone. I don't know. I was like I'll punch you in your fucking mouth I'm not trying to fucking get the crowd anymore. Now. I'm just a fucking guy in life And I'm gonna punch you in the fucking head in front of girl friend But it's been what it was actually got it

They're like any I don't know. Then he parascoped it. Half hour is a minute to comedy. He did parascoped on the board. You did parascoped that though. That was a different one. Oh, I'm sorry. That was the time where it was I did a bar show.

And I had the producer on the show and I screamed at the stand. You parascoped it at the stand. A different fight. Is this how you gain go mites? You to fight him and then you come to go mites Well, if they beat me then they can be a go-mine. Yeah, all right. I see how your fan base works pretty good Yeah, he beat and then he pours he cuts his finger and pulls blood in their mouth And he goes now you are now we are one if I beat them Listen do not hate on our subscription model

Listen, do not hate on our subscription model I go no It would have been so hard for me not to correct him say Xing over and over again have a gig. Hey yo man listen bra I'm done with this. Okay good good. More in second on that fucking candy can right now it's phenomenal. You said call them to see if you got a gig. I love it's these chairs. Yeah. He's like a, he's like a, he's like a bitch. Listen. Listen. Listen. Listen. I first thought he craved us. Listen. Listen. Listen. That's Gary Kravis.

Okay. Listen. And Carrie and Kevin, you know, alpha when they're on the show, it's back and forth. This guy just shut down the room. He became like a, he became like an inner city public school teacher where she gets too real and he's trying to break up a fight on the best part is. Like he's, if you don't know the studio, the chairs are like roly and the floor's a little uneven. So it's kind of hard to sit here as it is. Jimmy took her chair and spun it out of the way.

That was hilarious. That was insane. Can you go back on it? That was amazing. Go back, go back, go back, go back, go back, go back. Just a fuck, dude, go back a little bit. Just a fuck. I Wait, there's my favorite part look at Kevin grabs his wrist Look at Kevin grabbed his wrist. Yeah, he learned that move in a mall karate class with his wife So what's class what you have to do when the man come at you grab

Ruins Risk control is everything Carve my watch Michael come here. So he doesn't fight him. I thought he fought him. Wait, wait, oh Oh, she gets up So he doesn't fight him I thought I'm way way Oh Just the worst thing you just stop stop stop stop rewind that I got it you got to hear this All right the language that they're speaking though. It's a really important understand when Kevin speaking the language of like I'm a 50 year old man. Hey, let's just talk outside. No, no, no, you say to a thug let them hear it they didn't hear it before you're explained it let them hear it

every time it's funny she got up. Stop. Stop. He just chose. It's not that he was. He just chose the wrong wrong words. He went. He was like, wave me outside man. And as soon as he said, he What You want to go He will talk on will talk inside what no, he didn't say talk outside say meet me outside many explain Yeah, we're just gonna talk but it's so funny if you're not a thug you can never say to another like it's a dude Yo, yo yeah, yeah. That's all cool. Yeah. But it's so funny. If you're not a thug, you can never say to another like it's a duty. Oh, yo, meet me outside. That's like a fight me outside. Yeah, that's what the fucking fight is. The translation is fighting.

A lot of ways. Poor choice of words. You say you want to go? It's like, literally to get some sushi. Well, I just wanted to, what do you do for Christmas? I mean, Jersey City. You're not Jersey City. What are you doing?

Let me hold your wrist again. You want a dance bitch? You want me to literally do that? You have some very powerful wrist. What are you looking at? Your eyes and I love your eyes. And so it's like, look, my uncle owns a glass factor. I mean, you want to get some new glasses?

We all do this shit. Dude, Kevin's talk shit to me. People act like I'm that guy. The way Jimmy Legitimali is, I don't just go punch people. I like people act like I'm that guy like jam the way Jimmy legit I don't just go punch people mad Jimmy will punch you in the fucking mouth Kevin has talk shit to me where I'm like Kevin You don't really fucking know me like that's fine But it's like if I was a crazy person like people say that I am I would just punch him in his fucking head without any thought about it

So Look we're all comics, but we're also fucking dudes as well So at one point you got to go like do dude, you're to try to embarrass him. What's the premise of his podcast? Can I say I'm gonna get beat? No, no, no, I'll tell you what. Try to beat me up. Here's the thing is, if you listen to the whole podcast, it was going back and forth,

back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. They were just yelling at each other, saying fucked up, they were laughing, and then they would come back to serious. And at this point, when he he called up that's kind of embarrassing You're trying to expose him you're trying to expose him for being a phony About his career now, but Jimmy said colon though. Yeah, but he said column But ask him about you know and ask him about my you know what work I'm doing and I'm sure he's probably has a role on a show Or something or he did some stuff and Jason was Jason was me

I think Jason was just ants. I don't know what the what he does the auditions. I don't what are you asking me? I don't fucking know. He's probably on the phone with people. He's got shit to do and now Kevin. Yeah, and He just he said some fucking foul shit. They went to the gambling was fucked up dude. He called them again I talked to Jimmy. I spoke to Jimmy on the phone because he's coming into the show tonight. And he was like, yeah, you don't do that. Like you're trying to fucking like get me in trouble with my manager. It's one thing to ask him if I'm working. It's another thing to go like, well, now I'm going to cross another level where you prefer your

professional. Kevin, listen, Kevin does that. That's his thing. When you go to get punched in the face, when you do that, that's the risk you fucking run. Right. But is that that? Is that what the podcast is telling? I literally forgot you. What's the risk you fucking run. Right. But is that that? Is that what the podcast is telling the button? I literally forgot your. What's going on here? I just got back. I swam for Australia. I just got back here. But it feels like an ambush for Jimmy. You know, in the main. What? What did you speak? Water

out? Because you didn't even hear any of us shot up. No, I'm kidding. I got bad, baby. What? I want to hear you point. Kevin's podcast when he brings people in. No good. I need to rip some through the calls and embarrass them. No, I don't think that's kept. It's rake. Rakes through the cold. I'm sorry.

Thank you. I'm here to help. These guys are all making fun. I'm saying rip through the calls. I really saying. I think what happened. No, it's probably. Kevin flips out.

He does this thing. That's what Kevin does. But you can't have two of those guys in the room. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm here really saying. I think what happened, no, it's probably, he's, Kevin flips out, he does this thing, that's what Kevin does. But you can't have two of those guys in the room. Yeah. And when one's not doing it for real, if you weren't even doing that,

I would say, I really mean this. If you were to take 10 car rides with Jimmy Martinez, yeah, that might happen to one of them. Wonder, it doesn't have to be like, I ain't fucking shit. We're doing a ball-busting podcast where we're trying to really push each other's buttons. Jimmy's a fucking loose cannon.

I mean, I've watched, he pushed Todd Barry down to fight his tears. You're the guy with the fucking balls. Yeah, he got Todd pregnant and they didn't want to have the baby. Hey, Jimmy, bad news. Turned out, I'm pregnant. What?

What? And I'm gonna keep it fuck that you all no fuck that I love Todd Barry as a thug. Yeah, well guess what you're my man's and you can stay that way Why do you push him downstairs two flights of stairs? He wouldn't move out of the way cuz elevator is Wait a minute. No really why why do you I swear to God cuz he listen It was an only little girl. an only one move out of the way so he was like Todd move and then he pushed me to play to stairs And then Todd just looked up and went okay Jimmy never said wow What a Todd very

The Boston years ago, maybe that's why Todd so slow now Todd used to be a high-energy comic until Jimmy He was the first the original day My cerebral cortex Do I do a lot of what is it Tim? Madula Madula Madula Madula Madula Madula Madula Something African hooker hair is looking good again. Thank you. I'm wearing felt Have a chip have a chip put it in the

Okay, well, I'm gonna do right. We're almost done. Let's do that's why we're waiting for deep Okay, well, we do some gifts. We're gonna do it right, we're almost done. Oh, that's why we're ready for Deepu for this? No, we're not waiting. Good, Kelly, what do you got besides huge dance? Huge ass. Big old thighs, no act. That's not really having something.

That's the lack of something. Happy Ramadan, Deepu. Oh, Deepu, welcome to a show. What? Why is it not playing? Have you all said the line I am a madly little Ramadan Yeah, this is all live I'm really sure

I saw all that Do you know how hard Tom's dick was? Is that Tom Cassidy's dick? No, no, that's the guy Adam, that's the guy Adam Oh, is that Adam? Yeah, it's Adam Wasn't Tom on the show? I think Tom was dead I saw that comment, I gotta say I saw that comment Adam. Oh, is that Adam? Yeah, Adam. Wasn't Tom. I mean, Tom. We're going to happen eventually. I saw that comment. I gotta say I saw that comment.

So I was trying to let him know you're on camera. Like don't fucking don't do it. I shut this off. I think I think look, man, if, if, let me ask you question, if, if, if Jimmy just punched him right in the face and and knocked him out, do you think he'd be wrong? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he's not like a person.

You can't punch people in the face for saying things you don't like. But I understand. I said we'll go, okay, Kevin, you're kind of fucking asking for it. You're playing in traffic. Well, he threw something at his head. Yeah, who did that?

That's wrong too. You do that three times in episodes. Yeah, but I do a for-character purposes. I would never, I grabbed the coffee cup and stopped. You do that three times and I'm sure yeah, but I do a for character purposes I would never I grab the coffee cup and stopped I would never I would never hurt you Lewis a good coffee Well, that's a nice mug. Yeah, well, I don't want to ruin that fucking mug and I don't want to fucking I don't want to piss off this fucking dragon He'll fucking I don't know Is that your dragon? I was a game Yeah, right? Yeah, it's rattlesnakes. Did you shut it? Is that your dragon? Something like a horse kind of?

I mean, that was the gay thing that's ever happened on the show. I don't want to piss off this dragon. Like, this is a fucking real... I felt uncomfortable. There's it too much. All right, fuck this. That's a dragon impression. Let's do gifts.

Yeah! All right, fuck you, Jews. We need paper. We need a hat. A hat. Let's do gifts We need paper we need a hat hat Come on I'm grabbing it. Did you already get show? Did you already get the numbers? Yeah, we get the number I have a gift to should I my thing? I have a gift to should I my thing? I have a gift Joe, how do you play again? We got to put all the gifts in one place so they can we got a clear table The gifts can be doesn't have to be wrapped right?

Yes, yeah, yeah, that's the whole point you dumb dumb Krius, I do some with that name calling do I gift is in the Santa hat Is this the fucking wrapping With that name calling to I gift is in the Santa hat I Just a fuckin rapid All this heat we should be buying actual gifts Tim I did buy a gift all right who and it's small so it goes in there I gift all the gifts in front. I found all the gifts in front get that can't this is a gift Lewis throw that I need another bag my bag Lauren I need another bag. My bag is... Lauren, I need another bag. Oh, thank you, Deepo.

Thank you, Lauren. Have you seen? Oh, man. Kelly, move the bag. Somebody said on Twitter. No, leave it there. Oh, the red one. I think it's blocking your face.

No, no, it's the other bag. It's blocking your face. It's blocking your face. No, the green, the green coming out of it. This one. This one. Oh, man. Oh, man. Oh, man. Oh, man. Oh, face. No, no, it's the other bag. It's blocking your face. It's blocking your face

The green the one with the green coming out of it. This one is blocking Lewis's face Yeah, there you go. No keep it loose get off your fucking phone. Hey, bro What are you? What is it? It's my fucking babysitter? What's wrong? What are you fucking date there? Tell the fucking do a job? Stop texting you deep. Who if you got to stop fucking on the phone. I'm fucking serious. I'm getting sick of it. I'm gonna fucking babysit. I'm not babysitting. I need a fucking fucking... I said, imagine a babysitter treating Bobby's diaper. Don't, you better put down my wee wee.

You know what I talk to my babysitter? Bye. And that's it. When I come back. Hi. This clock said, what are you fucking banging on? What are you fucking? Because you hear what you're fucking right? What are you fucking cocksucker? No, you have no fucking girlfriend. Yeah, do are you serious? Yeah, yeah, it's girlfriend. You fold them, fold them up, fold them. It's Kelly.

If you started thinking Kelly, they're gonna have to twist, they have to hang out. Joe, how do we play Joe? You pick a number. This is my gift right here. It's phenomenal. Can we just make sure also 10 gifts, 10 people? My gift is here, it's in the hat. Okay, stop with the fucking my gift.

My how do we play? It's a very fine gift. You pick a number and then whoever gets number one chooses the gift. All that goes in a bag wrapped up, you know what I'm saying? Everyone picks numbers first. It doesn't tell anybody what number they have. That's the first up.

Okay, so they have to be sold up. You don't tell. You're the other boss right now. You take all the numbers, you hold on to your number. Then once everyone has their number, you don't tell everyone not number you have. And then whoever is number one, they choose the gift. They have a gift.

Let's stop there. Let's stop there. Number two stop there. Let's stop there Number two. Yeah, let's stop there and then it's all get a number and then you explain from there number one is the best number We don't tell everyone the number I thought we tell you we told I fucking do this every year Last year we Surprise Oh

Did that last year, but yeah, but that's not as fun. It's dramatic. We're doing it his way Dramatic it's the way there are no rules. I thought by the fastball I saw where is it I don't know either That was just a Bobby's feet. Okay, here we go. Ready? Who goes first, Joe? Santa. Whoever be picked the numbers.

I'll go first. Pick a number. Don't tell anyone. Um, but. Okay. I threw it around. No, tell you. Now you go.

Now you go. Now you go. Now you go. Now you go. go now you go now depot goes now you go now you go now hold on get a little mix I got the number one is the best right number one is the best it's number one I don't know what mine is I got a number. This is my number right here You have the last number I don't know what mine is No, do you have no he has an upper he put a gift in He's we have 11 wait a minute. Are we doing did you put did you he doesn't have a number?

No, it isn't there's no number in the hatch. She didn't do fucking ten. Well there's no hat. Did someone take two? No. I did. You did. I didn't look. I didn't look but now you got that one. Which one do you want? No you pick. Go ahead. This one? Who is that guy? His Christmas was just ruins. Okay. Ready? Just came here. Okay, ready here. We go. Wow All right, can I just ask one question? Are you a girl or a guy? Okay, that's a jawline. That's a man. Matt Damon. It's a boy. Matt Damon. You kind of look like a hot lesbian

I kind of like yes. Is that what you think Matt Damon looks like? He's kind of a little and Roger. No, not a little bit a little bit. What's it? Roger this mean that means that woman girl. You don't know mix you don't know Man gay man. What what would you say? Give him the bandana Let me take off his scar. Okay. Now Joe. We all have our things. So whoever's number one Show yourself reveal who you are and choose a gift Hold on I'm ready for a real-ass Christmas. It doesn't matter when I pick on By the way, I'm number one. Ha ha ha. Me or not? All right.

Okay, so what does he do? We're a flip-flop. You picked it. You're gonna go with this. Wait, we got it. Let's shut the fuck up. Where's everybody's gift? Shut your fuck up.

No, no, no. You just picked it. You don't know, okay. Who's the shoes? You don't say who's the shoes? Okay, go ahead. Who's the shoes? Who's the shoes?

You can make sounds. Who's the shoes again? I'm throwing a coffee mug at you. Who's the shoes? Who's the shoes? What, it doesn't even matter. I didn't even matter where I picked it. Who's who's you can make sounds who's as who's again? I'm throwing a coffee mug at you I didn't remember who's who's who's who's who's Can I pick I open this now? We can't say who's the suit we can give clues the most Perfect person in here skip so no more babysitter talk good for you no more babysitter club And I guarantee you wasn't talking to me. Why'd you get real? Okay?

Open it up. He's talking to his girlfriend cause he's a fucking pussy whipped ass all His phone is old, smash it Got some fucking chocolate So this is like a variety gift Oh yeah Oh there's a lot to it, who's this gift? Dan Soda

Oh god, Dan's soda He reads variety every week Oh that was a fucking something Clever, it's for when you drive but he doesn't have a license So perfect Oh he has that That's the thing you can put your phone in so you can watch You some glasses some more driving gear. That's fun. I got all driving stuff Lee on the road at a wall. Yeah, well some chapstick. Yeah for my herpes Night time. That doesn't help her piece. I like that pack

It's a the Dan go the Dan so to gift pack. I like it. It's fucking good I can't have the fucking ladoras In order to yeah, you have now at the very end you can get any gift you want to love it I tell you you have that thing for your phone. I do but I like the glasses I drive it night on the sawmill Who's number two? yes, I'm two Kidding I'm not number two is the worst number to have and who has it and it's my goddamn game Who's number two and I fucking got it?

Joe is number two Perfect Nothing in here open it open it up open it dude I'm gonna keep the high quality of cousin. I was just a little bit speaker. No, Lauren's gift that we talked about was gonna be a certificate to see your boobs if I say. You know what fuck you, you're a fuck you couldn't done it. Dave Smith was here she would have done it. I mean she said yeah, it was gonna be great. Kelly, sack up up Bring in those I My So you got it what did you get what was it a speaker?

Do you know so I can choose that now. Do I get to always? No, you sit there quietly. No, if you say number one, you don't get to speak the rest of the whole thing. I got a speaker that matches her lips. They're like yours. It does. I can't fuck. High quality. Fucking ruined day.

High quality, Lauren. I'm really, yeah, I'm literally sexually harassing her. All right, who's number three? Who's three? Number three, right here. Bollockella. All right, who's number three? Number three right here Who's three? Scopus who's three you're getting scopus gift your scopus gift It matters scopers jacket hang on a second talking to the microphone monkey

Wow, she's white. I can call it. Wow What are you saying? What are you implying? What are you applying by that? I'm saying she was a white guy. You can't call him. Do it at the can of motor oil. It's okay. It's all old spark plugs. I'm telling you guys, tech is my thing. Okay. We've teched to me. Yeah, those things are all you would like that. If you want pocket power, I got some of my pants. Oh! Oh!

All right, that's four. Four. I got four. That was the most important thing. That's right. That's right. Where's your gift? My gift is right there.

Oh, you're gonna want my gift then. This one? Yep. That's my gift. I mean, I can see it. You're not gonna open it. You know what it is. What is it what is what is put in a garbage bag? What is it wow tech what an underwhelming gift to unwrap what is it whoa

Synoculars It's all tech kids virtual reality headset remote with the price tag still 1999 on the fucking oh, so this is like you put your phone in it Yeah, on the money you could play VR games. I don't get it. You can watch three It's like a portable Oculus Rift. I don't know what that means. Oculus bro. It's the future It's fucking you fucking 3d virtual reality shit, dude But don't you need to have something a Phone you put your phone in your download virtual reality you download it you can watch V.I.Porn. Yeah Put it on your phone put it in there

Vicki owns gonna town on Thursday. Guess who's gonna smack it on the couch in virtual world I'm not you. I'm gonna take that let me tell you something virtual. Listen to me virtual porn is the crick I was in the chair and I was pumping They at this point do we start exchange like you guys started changing. Yes Yes, right now you can you can power But you can take her pocket thing right or you could switch can he take this as well? Wait, so I get to choose I get you that's what the swap is you knucklehead This she kept her you get to pick any gift you get a choice of this the skyline of one of those I have a

Dildo pocket power. I have a dildo speaker or you can take that most shit You got Lewis have a mofie case I'm gonna keep mine. Oh Final answer answer who's number five. I got him a five. Okay. I want Lewis's gift What are you gonna do with switch blades What do you do with rolled nickel Blades? What are you gonna do with Roll Nichols? That's similar to my job. I said, except that it's funny. That's a receipt.

Call 201 to the number. Oh, that's an exciting one. Don't say the number. Just call it. All right, let's look. That's exciting. You are all in it. NSA Flylist.

That's exciting. 201 is Rhode Island Island doesn't it? It's for you may not leave the country for the next six I hope it's a if it's a blowjob. I want it I really we got to be we got to be quite I want to hear the bit here. I hope you got it up put on speaker phone up to the microphone Is it in your phone? Hello, I got come on up Hello Hello, I got you take him on up. I got come on up Okay, thank you what the fuck?

This is a cool kid Oh The fucking shit every year It puts thought all this walk by a right age the last minute This cocks I get, I'm so nervous. I got a lighter in chapstick. Yeah, I know I know it is, but it is too. CVS is pretty good for that.

Now wait, we might be able to steal this. Yeah. I'm six, I could take this gift. You could technically take the gift. I don't wanna come up then. Why? I don't know what it is. I don't want him to steal with them.

What are you talking about? I don't want to steal it. You can't play that. You gotta see the gift. You gotta see the gift. You can't play that! You got a man! You got to see the gift! You got to see the gift! You got to see the gift! You got to see the gift!

What are you panicking for? Because I don't want you to steal it. Yeah, nobody wants anybody to do anything else. No one's ever sounded sadder and more childish. I want it! You didn't see the fuck was that? That's literally the fucking break my siblings toy because mine's broken.

All right. Are they coming up? I hope it's not another Santa? With tits What the hell the dying kid what all right here we go okay, so so my gift to the recipient of this yeah is going to My phone on a fucking table take the phone off the table Going to the phone on a fucking table. Take the phone off the table. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's me. a minute? First of all That's how do we know she's a transgender? Google or I mean I don't believe that chat's actually just a girl from the blog She's that's not hi honey. How you doing? You got to promote Natasha here. Let's get Natasha a mic

There's no way listen. We got to give her a microphone. We have a mic on the couch. Can we give her the mic? We got to give her a microphone. We have a mic on the couch. Can we give her the mic? There's no way Gender by the way there's no way here Come grab a seat over here Natasha. Yeah. Yeah, we have no no no, no, so Lewis Can you you want to you want to fucking you go sit on the couch Lewis here? Oh my god You can sit on it. It's fine. Kick rocks Lewis. Oh man. I feel our balls Wait a second. Wait a second.

High speed. I don't have balls. Shut up. You're your balls removed. Wait a minute. Just have a dick. What? I'm out.

You can keep it. You want the full, I want the full. I want those on my chin. I want a wet em. I'm gonna blow the boat. That was fuck. If I'm gonna go, I'm going. I want to whappen off my ass. What's up, baby?

How you doing? How are you? I'm, where's your microphone? Yeah, her microphone's not on. There we go. There we go. There we go. Can I think, can you hear me?

No, you can use my microphone. There it is. Do it. I got you, baby. I got you, baby. That one works now. Yeah, we're putting it on the crunchy bag. There it is. Do it. I got you baby. That one works now. Yeah, putting it on the crunchy bag. Hello, can you hear me? How are you? What's your name? Now, what's your name for everybody? My name is Natasha Dreams. Okay. N-A-T-A-S-S-I-A. And you've been in the porn for what you're what are you known for what are your points?

Tranny surprise Oh, that's I know what that is Do you have the series one three thirteen? He's a fan. He's a super fan. What is this? The baby said it one Who watches that Was it with the bald guy? Yes Are you the ball guy?

Baby it's been so long Maybe I missed you. I'm so sorry inside of me. Oh, it's out of you me too I am so sorry. I'll never throw anything at you again or fake it You have to feel like her body buddy. I know but you have no idea. Oh, I do You're like Santa with alopecia So here's the thing the scuffle has has her right now, right? But I got six mother fucker Jesus has shown

By the way and shine the light upon Bobby. He's giving me an effects development here And the woman of my dreams has come to me Jesus praise Jesus praise Jesus Lord Jesus Christ. I did not see Lord's tinnis, but I've been see her penis with no balls. But all you need is for Tim to have a higher number than you. Tim, if you fuck me on this, no, listen, Tim's not a Tim's into dudes. Yeah, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, yeah, I'm gonna let Bobby have this. Here's a thing. I feel like there's a Scope on Bobby might be battling Old fucking adage if you take a tranny from someone on Christmas

I Want to say something here though What Baby How you doing? I'm actually really horny today. I don't know if the cold weather just makes me make that face Maybe I should make the shock time. I need somebody here. You need somebody That's my favorite movie

The name of this episode it has to who's gonna you guys playing the who's getting the hard first game? All right, so who's next you're also you should look at her penis. It's phenomenal. I want, can I see it? No, she won't put out on the screen this time. No, I mean, can I see it? Where's my phone? Yeah, I'm trying to put it on. Yeah, we'll Google it. Yeah, I wasn't pointing at it.

Can I see it? I didn't know you had your balls removed. I didn't know that was a thing. I tried to do it with my dog. You didn't know that was a thing. They would do it in real quick. It would be amazing to hold. Yeah, spell it.

How old is your dog? He's 11. They wouldn't take his balls off. Yeah, you gotta do it when you're young Yeah, that's what for the yeah now. Why did you can I ask why did you have your balls removed because it? It stops your testosterone now So you have to take less hormone replacement, which is better for your liver So now now You're nuts out and you have the sack with little fake ones or the whole thing?

You know what, I'm thinking about that. Or do you look like a baby? No, it's a thick little skin there. You can't really see it. So there's no, you have no dangle or nothing. There's nothing, no, not really. Nothing, no. All right, so there's nothing to hold on to.

But that's probably like a look. But you know what, it's like, almost like a vagina lips, you know? Oh, it's taken a vagina lip. All right, let me, what's going on with this? Because I want to see your, I never thought I'd say this. I really want to see your penis. Where is it? There they cook at N.A.T.S.S.S. I'm gonna say this. Why are we? Can somebody talk to me please about why we're not? N-A-T-A-S-S-S-I-A dreams.

All right. Well, I mean, just let me know that you're working on it. Instead of fucking stop. Images, images, images, images. Images, images. Go to Images. Go to Images. Go to Images.

Go to Images. Go to Images. Go to Images. Go to Images. Go to Images. Go to Images. Go to Images. Go to Images. Go to Images. Go to Images. Go to Images. IA dreams all right well, I mean just let me know that you're working on it instead of fucking Images images image Fuck with you Pupinus put nude

Put nude right nude right nude Squiz it just in the bra for cut this coming from vanilla And then go to all them Go back to the sack That's your nuts it looks like a truffle To be honest, it doesn't look like it's not a huge ticket. It wouldn't really it looks like dance Christmas presents Yankee's what it's a pack of linddores How big how big is your dick? Six and a half the size of seven. Yeah, if I had fucking seven

Great breasts. She's great That's pointing at you Bobby. Hey you I'm gonna Sam watch you Well, you got a nice penis you got your beautiful woman thing and I'm gonna pick a gift is it my turn? Yes, but it's hard for me because you know me and scope on me too We've had a past we've had a past a great past He's not on the show anymore, but I still care about Scopo. And I love him, and I look at my life,

and I have a wife and a kid in the house, and things are going great, and I'm just so happy. And Scopo, you know, he's working his butt off, he's trying, I hear good things. His butt's still on, I can see it. And I feel like I should, I'm gonna let you have it. But you haven't picked a gift yet. I know it. I'm gonna let you have it But you haven't picked a gift. Yeah, I know I'm gonna pick a gift But you thought I was gonna pick this I'm letting you know that I'm gonna let you have her

What if your gift is shit? It's not gonna be please someone put a box of shit on More than already to Big J for his birthday I give a box of shit and this is a hard one, dude And I want this fucking lap. That's real bad. I bet you give a box of shit and this is a hard one dude that I want this fucking lap dance real bad I bet you give a great lap dance to Maybe maybe not now how what's the lap dance gonna be just in the outfit or Panies that's why isn't in panties or is it in just that outfit?

So right in here you're gonna get a bunch of all rules can they feel your boobs? Is there security? I'll be your security. Oh, nobody's gonna fuck with you. Yeah, no, Lizzie. Yeah, me and Lewis will fucking... Me and you are gonna be the one fucking with her though. How long is it going to be? A song.

A song. And it got a divita. I'm in heaven. Yeah, but we're singing it. Here you go. Okay, here we go. Are you ready? I'm gonna pick a gift. There it is.

You owe me, motherfucker. The weather, yeah. I literally have a heartbeat in my pecker right now. Let's go to pulse. Where how many gifts? So there's a brown paper bag. Let's clear some of the stuff. That's yours. That's yours. The red and the red. This is a gift right here Hold on can't feel it fuck face Yeah, scope it and grab her dick fat face Lewis fat face Yeah, you settle your aggression down. What? Natasha is very turned on by me right now guys look who steal out right now

Fuck me So fucking mad right now you can still switch what is it look at our just insulted look at her in a tail Just insulted look at her head a tail It's great you got dirty ears say nice Fuck it's safe. That's good for master be safe. I don't I don't fuck I'm not a man That's you go raw Monday night raw he massive edge to the rest of the rest of the what's with the fucking lind doors? They're great and you know what I just want to say lind doors. Thank you for sponsoring my upcoming tour With Tim Dylan who's called the This is terrible gift who is this?

Kelly that's a terrible gift Kelly So many fucking time I do this god for sake and game you guys give either Dildos or a shitty Fun gift Really cool fun things for you And get because none of you will have the girl It was only got the mail Lauren that would get the girl gift and one of us decided to go home We need to go home happy okay. I get to switch right yeah switch it just fucking take her Bob. This is for you You know that all that lotion will get wasted up on one of scopos butt cheeks

That was a little too far. I like to I think the laughs are hard to come back as very dramatic right now But I feel like you had a good one. I've had like nine dude. I think the laughs are hard to come back is very dramatic right now, but I feel like you had a good one I've had like nine What's your gift? My gift is the Thim slim. What's your gift? Oculus? What's a solid gift? Solid gift I have a human woman with a penis Human woman with a penis and his unbelievable boobs by the way. Unbelievable boobs. Jesus Christ.

Look at the Oculus so you can still enjoy, Mr. Mimic. Wait, Lewis, what's your gift right now? What are you doing? There's a thing I want this gift, but I feel bad for dummy because he fucking begged. He went, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no it was and I feel bad, because we have, do you have a girlfriend? I got nothing. I haven't got laid over a month. Wow.

And he's got real, oh, to you. Let me ask you, who are you more attracted to? Bobby your scopo. Success? No, success. We're suck. Can I have a book? Woo!

Woo! Hey, Joe, can we split Aggie's waps? Hey, well, that's your business. I'm going to tell you what it is. That's actually her business. It's Bobby just taking the bottom half. How do you know how it sounds? I don't know.

Do you remember the live YKW show that he's on the floor? You're fucking dick. Remember that? You remember watching fucking be appreciative. Let's get out there. Lewis, what's your gift for it? Now, what's your gift for it?

I'm going gonna take those speakers What did I just get you got Kelly's got a bag of lotion I'm gonna let you have it special thanks buddy. You can have it for now for now People who is still has number one by the way. Yeah, I know I can take whatever the fuck I want you do whatever you want Buddy, you've brought joy to this podcast So many years. I have enjoy the oh legs lady we can shave your empty ball skin with this later How funny would be if she walked in she went Bobby We've been dating I'm a senior for fucking three years. Is this another?

Is it another shit pack? Oh, you the gift. Okay, who's next great? I love to keep who's next Okay, you're up buddy Question scopo Why did you have her number? I have Laney's number oh Lane by the way, thank Laney Laney spiser first of all Laney always the shit I'll let's say something, Bubba, you always bring fun and great people to the show's serious podcast.

You do so much. I love you, baby. Thanks for bringing people on. Well, because Lauren is such a good watchdog. She's like, she's like, I don't know if we can bring people unannounced. I was like, it's Laney. You're always gonna know fucking Laney Spizer.

Laney's always good, always. Yeah. All right, So what do you got? I'll take the red one. Okay, the red one are you. I took your place when you were in here. Oh, geez. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Look, I don't know who he is either. All right, I'm just going with dirt.

I like the therapy. I catch up. By the way, belongs to the all tree. That belongs to the all tree. I just put it in there. Come on. That's not the ketchup is not actually part of the gift. I can't stop looking at her tits. Yeah, you're an idiot, dude Yeah, I mean like her abs are probably give cord. Yeah, but here's a

There's a thing gun oil. Oh Gun oil Loub That got a first of all let me say something you can loob that bottle and stick it right in your butt Is it loop for a gun or your day? Is it a gun? No, it's not a little blue, but it's shaped like a bullet What am I fucking? No, you'll lose that bottle you need something at the end Yeah, why gonna lose that how big your ass? Just comes up your throat You shoot it across the room

You keep it good. What is it just Loub? And a Chipotle gift card. How much is the card? How much is that a refund? It's a $10 gift card and a $10 aniloo. I got a whole ass. I got a whole ass. You keep it and who's next?

Thanks for talking through my gift. Real nice. Real nice. What is that? We pumped up the gift. Two left. Come on. Eight times. You ruined my day. No, there's three left. There's one two three

The paper bag or the hat full garbage. Who the fuck is this guy? The hat what do you got? Samia cookies That's a real on the way here just like all That's a real on the way here just like all Listen, it's 15 cookies. That's what that fucking thing is it translates to 15 hot fresh cookies And they're fucking angry Spanish guy to angry black girl It's perfect. I'm actually you want 15. Yeah, I'm actually too cheap to go there So this is actually perfect. Yeah, you just great great. You're keeping your gift

Great. I thought I put a lot of thought into that actually don't want to Don't make do with dance. You don't want Oculus. They'll deliver the cookies to you're up to 3 a.m. They'll deliver the cookies He doesn't need Oculus parents made those I Wish he has the abs over UFC fighter Can I go now? Can I get a gift? I'm fucking Kiss her abs. Can you kiss your abs even if you doesn't give me? Kiss my abs. That's what you're saying Well, I'll be sorry. I'm trying to fuck

Conner across the table. He's fucking monster Jesus dude you almost just pushed Lauren out of the way like Mike like Mark Jimmy Mark. I'm gonna be it beat it Get you have regular vagina out of the way Get you a girl tits out of the way. Yeah, she's harder than Lauren. Oh, yeah. Oh, wow. She smells like a unicorn.

How do you know what a unicorn smells like? Yeah. You don't know what a unicorn is there? That's the thing, you can get in the gift. Oh, wow. Oh my goodness. Bob, how did you not choose that, Bobby? Are you kidding me? You fucking kept up speaker, you idiot.

He's getting the speaker. Yeah! Yeah! All right, I got a little smell. I got a little... Oh my, she smells fucking. Oh my god She smells guys. Why'd you get away? I'm fluffin up a little bit watching you with her. Is that weird buddy? Listen to me you bet a fucking let me take something don't she sit because this guy might fucking take it if you take it

I'll fucking love you forever. It'll be the funniest thing ever in the world, but Dude you better thank me you smell so good. forever, it'll be the funniest thing ever in the world. But dude, you better thank me. You smell so good. You know it would be the ultimate Kelly. You gotta fucking take it. That would be the best. Kelly, if you- I was here. Oh man.

Kelly, just a second or so. I'm coming nine. Do you ever fuck women too? I'm coming. Yeah. Do you ever fuck Kelly's? I'm coming. I'm coming.

I'm coming. Okay, here we go. I'm just trying to keep it focused.'s Okay, here we go Don't go just from last year don't go Let me tell you some people might have fucking felt bad about that. I want to choke slam him through a table for those last He maybe eat vegetable burritos from Taco Bell He got vegan tacos. I don't know it's very hard, but I think I'm gonna go with this Okay, paper bag. Okay, let's see what it is. We're going to pay for bad. He's opening the bag What is inside? What is the bag of blow? What is it? Oh I don't smoke it's a pipe. Oh, it's not $20 worth

Who did that Lewis that bowl worth Twenty twenty twenty bucks. Okay, there you go. I'm solved all like that You can put and you can put that in your ass too. I read Tim you can trade. Yeah, you can trade for You can give a mock list for this you know I just have a choice. I can't give up anything What did you say I want the Oculus you did trade I was You're a fucking 80 I didn't make him decide. I just like saying the word 80 That's nice. I did well here. That's a Well, you can still get a stolen by Kelly or Lewis here. We got it. We got it. We got to we got to go now

This wall it is on the table. Let's say this listen to how quiet scopo is right now this guy has a full-on hard on Just trying to tired to just not be trying not to rock the boat Have you guys have you guys have a hook up me and our yeah, no, but there's a sexual energy here isn't there. I think you You get a mate for each. What is it? She's got one look at her finger one fingernails painted different And that's the one that goes up your butt. butt while she's blowing you so she doesn't forget What is it nothing? What is it orgasms? I think I think I think it's a gym membership

Correct me from wrong D.P. Is this a one-way ticket to Washington? The bus ticket to Maryland. Yeah, why? Maryland one way just one way for what? Travel to give the travel I like it Kelly if you fucking I will kill you I will If you don't fucking Train I will not funny Fucking Kelly if you don't trade you're not funny kill you you'll never come back on the show

I will fucking Kelly if you don't trade Kelly you'll never the fuck up ever be back on the show You don't trade Kelly you'll never get the fuck up ever be back on the show Ever will you be back on the show Kelly you have given the gift of setup Cannot Kelly's not allowed to cross borders because of her lease or whatever. I will wrap you out I will rat you out to the government. I mean Kelly can't fit in a bus seat The go sorry miss. We're gonna need two tickets for you. You know, you know, for a long time, he always talked about revenge, huh? Um, Kelly.

What do you want me to do, Bob? I want you to do the right thing. Me too. Don't take this from scope, but she's not gonna enjoy it. Yes, she will. You'll just probably take your number one, because you'll take it away from it anyway

Well, no, here's the truth. Here's the way that I feel about it, right? Natasia, I don't want her to be wasted on fucking Kelly You know, I feel like scope or you are the ones that I wanted to have this gift I want to smell it. Yeah, but that's not what the Yankee swap is about bro. I know, but I'm buying Gets each other She's giving me a apt-a that sucks. All right I'll call here's a deal if First if if it gets crazy and she feels starts to get feel a little comfortable and it comes out you have to put it in your mouth

That's the deal the moral of the story is that this gift is dog shit is dog shit It's broken I got a fucking car The bus leaves tomorrow He's funny and then everybody in the room What am I supposed to do he just em night shot along this Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha though. Non-refundable. Non-transparent. Oh, you're out of code. He just wasted $20 to $15. I'll tell you this. Listen, listen, listen, we all have to say it. People really go, I find public transportation to be very interesting. Dad, dad, dad. I don't know what to do. Last year's Yankee swap mom's idea is stalk and I got a lot of shit. Do you remember what

I gave to you on your 12th Christmas? Wait a minute was a gift of Traveler Yeah, but it was but it was it was only it was only one way to fill it out here I know and I gave you to the human smuggler What's stavros supposed to be here and that was for stavros? No Not supposed to be here. We see a booking holes, bro But if Tim doesn't lose weight and fit into that costume next year

Maybe it will be stop. This is a fucking insult this costume I thought I was gonna have a nice I got you a nice one. I fucked up. I know Could you just buy it and return it buddy like a nice Christmas suit? Why would anybody buy something? I would rather buy a really nice expensive rather buy a really nice expensive. Can I say something? I'm saying I'm saying. I've had great say. Hey, Bubba, I bought the good one.

It's in my car uptown in a garage because I went to do gym and mat series podcast. I thought it was that serious. I parked my car there. I had to run the fuck up to stand up labs and then run down here. She had to run and go get a prom through Sanitane for the bit. Why don't you do stand up, what, why don't you do a by show? You never asked me two days with stories. It's called I know I know fucking.

It's a number one. No podcast for you. What measure is it number one? I want to stand up labs network. I would start to the pros. It's not. I think even race wars probably is a bigger show. Yeah, it's not a number one show.

Yeah, shut up. Anyway, okay, here we go. All right, Kelly, What are you doing? What are you gonna do? I Listen anything you could pull you could take look at you get this speaker would be good in your one room and Lauren, what are you? Lauren has a phone charger. That's a phone charger. Actually nice. That's a battery. That's a battery phone charger And then I'm a sage her body. I got your creams over here and catch up. This is my gift to my wife.

So if you take them back, I'm in. And what do you have? He has a power on a pipe. But this, I mean, this is a nice thing. I'm going to go to your bar. I'm pretty greedy. I don't know. It's Christmas and my heart is always full of love and joy.

And cholesterol. And cholesterol. It's hilarious if my heart is always full of love and joy right and cholesterol It's hilarious if I took something away from someone. I couldn't do it to him. Okay. Good for you. I get you I understand what are you gonna take I'm gonna take the speakers please? Whoa The fuck you You have you're never coming on the show against God bless it. Bobby, you have the most money besides soda and me and Lewis.

You don't need a gift. You have everything you need. Right at home. I'm gonna take this to wash. She didn't go f**king blow a tranny. I don't know if I'm gonna have a f**king man. You said Ireland. That's the Maryland, right? I have a fucking Maryland. DC.

That's Maryland. DC is not at Maryland. It's on territory. You get to get it. You get to get it. You get to get it. Uber to the Mara to Washington. I'm so sad.

I know I get to pick what I want. You know what, Bobby, think about this. I'll ever get to pick my thing. All right. Now you get to take a long sad bus ride to DC as you think about Scobo enjoying his lap dance. DC is beautiful this time here. It really is.

Yeah, but there's a storm coming tomorrow, so that's probably not great. Why would you buy a storm? From marijuana, it's recreation. True. What? Recreational. I'm just thinking about your penis. What?

Would you say, babe? Recreational. We finished each other sentences. I hope you steal it. I hope you take it. I hope you take it. It would nothing, because you fucking laugh to me. I hope you take it, Lewis Gomez. I love it.

Lewis, this is it. This is it, Lewis. Lewis, it's up to you. Lewis, you can rest. It's up to you, Lewis. Hang on one second. How you doing, man? This is the largest crowd Lewis has ever headlined for.

All right. What do I want? So I have We know what you want to dig in your butt I'm Natasha, she does feel... Do you like it? I can't do it Why don't you guys, can you kiss real quick? No, no, no, stop Why not? Just a... My chick will be furious with me

Oh, you're the chick, she's watching right now I'm fucking married, I just kissed a snob, I can smell the bum bum. Yeah, well you're an idiot. Yeah, that's bad news. You also smell her. You smell some other dudes come. That's fucked up man. No, I'm a man.

Why would you say that? What? I'm not kidding you. You smell like a fresh baked bread. She smells, I can't even tell you. It's so fucking, it's like Christmassy and Angelic. In all seriousness, you're in big trouble, buddy. Why?

This is video you're gonna wife at home and a shib? I told my wife I was going to strip a couple last week, she looked me up and down, she went, oh, God. Ha ha ha ha ha! But she knows I'm not fucking doing anything, and she knows I'm half a fucking queen anyways. I'm not doing anything.

She have a typed in Sheridan Hotel on a Google search. I'd be in trouble as she knows Oh, what happened? She male sites would just swim up. Oh That was a real thick piece I thought you cheated. I thought you cheated in the Sheridan hotels like Dude you're gonna have a whole shit store my wife doesn't go fuck of course. I wouldn't do anything Yeah, we're doing on camera. I'm just thinking about Todd bear getting thrown down those days

All right Lewis come on Jimmy Martinez you are bitch. I snigger Wow, okay, what are we gonna do? I'll slap the mother fucking taste That's what do we get there? Let's see come on buddy. Yeah, look big. I should have kept on my huge Transgender fucking Supporter I'm a supporter of marijuana. I support how many transgender women if I had on the show? Five six, why is this? This is Louis moment give Louis's moment. The fuck up Bobby you're a hero coming shot the fuck up again I'm gonna fuck the fuck up. No throw anything Human shield human shield

Human true I threw it and hit her that she beat the shit out of me What Let's go outside You should get force field Lewis you have enough time to come up with a punchline. Let's have it. Come on. Here it is. Here we go. I am I love her body It just fucking feels good. Yeah, we know. We know, you're a fucking, come on, do it.

Shut the fuck up, everyone. I wanted to say what I want. We know what you want. You gay, we know what you want. You want a nice dick. The lab dick essentially. Yeah, I've had this for so long. I know, I'm not joking.

What do you want? I'm not taking it from Scopo. Scopo's my brother and I wanted to give for Christmas. That's the idea. You really gay, so. You want the lab dick and so love you, you my friend and I'm gonna take the fucking speaker That's what you get fuck face. What does she get? What does she get she gets the box of dance soda toiletries and fucking But those are good

And you get my live at Gotham credit from 2009 Can you hand me the present please? Where is it? I don't know Fucking you know what happened, but what we gotta do do we have time for Rose thorn Yeah, we have time. We have how long's it take? 10 minutes half hour to hour. Let's go. What's that? It's a fun game end of the year game. Okay. Yeah truffles American truffle so they're made with science Let's do it ready. Yeah, thorn him rose. How do we play?

Okay, I let her do it. Oh, yeah, let her go. I was wanting to hang out more. What the fuck, all right? Oh, she's up to you. Now, I was up to her. If she wanted to leave, she can leave. But let's do the lap dance now that you threw it out there.

So let's do it. Ready? Let's do it. All right. Can it be to a holiday song? Yeah, we'll play a Christmas song. Depot, can we play a, I just want to help him out?

Rocking around the Christmas tree. But, hey, hey, that sucks. What do you talk about? It's a Christmas tree dick. Don't make it a friend lap, man. Don't make it a like a 12 minutes old. What about baby? Baby is called that side. Make it a 15 minutes song. No, that's the second one.

Rocking around. Okay, wait a second. I want to Dave Matthews instrument. Hang on one second. What about God resty, Mary? Jesse. Yeah, the what about the new Kelly Clarkson so I like that shut up. I like your face Three-piece your god shut up listen. Here's we're gonna. I gotta get you

No, no, I need that on camera listen You're gonna sit over there pull you chair right there with she is right there push this microphone away Give a little bit. Yeah, what Give a little bit Joe yeah, what? Can you make it a side? There's a lot of jazze in it. All right, yeah, right? Okay, you got a rest. Can we have you?

Can you switch for this? God restry, Mary gentlemen. That's the one. Guys, guys, shut the fuck up. I can't hear. Send it back. No, don't do that. Do God restry, Joe.

No, I'm gonna do a sexist. She wants to dance to a fucking sexist. All right, tell him. I'm dealing with this. Do the Kelly Clarkson Christmas. Pull in here. Right? No know that sucks Right there

I need you to turn sideways we need to see a side view of you like turn side like right there Yeah, that'd be sideways That microphone you're not gonna talk so move push it this way. No, no, no, just push it this way. Yeah Yeah, you're all you're all horned up. You're not thinking properly. Yeah. All right. You got your seamen clogging your brain up. Okay. Here we go. Oh, it's all falling. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. It's all falling. All right. Let me see. Let me see. I gotta see this view. Scope up. Let me see. I gotta work on me right now.

Don't do anything else. Turn side with it. Directing. I'm excited. All right. Move back a little bit. A little bit right there. Okay. Right. Fucking. I love Bobby the porn director. All right. Here's what we're gonna do. move back a little bit, a little bit right there. Okay, right, fucking. I love Bobby the porn director. All right, here we go.

All right, here's what we're gonna do, lights. We need lights. This is Lucy. Get that other camera on. God rest you. Merry Christmas, man. All right, is that it, the song? Do we get the song?

Is that the song? No, it's all good. Here it is. You're in trouble, oh my gosh. Shut the fuck up, I get eight minutes. So the scopo jokes don't hurt me right now Joe This is sexy. This is a wide version. Does it play like loud? Is that it? Okay, wait. That's a good one.

Dude, rock it around the chest. That's really good. What? Stop! Tim's doing picket. Sexy song is God rest you Mary Jenner. What's that one from? Mariah Carey. What's the one from George Michaels? I don't know. What's that? I gave you my heart.

And but next day, I'm telling you, I'm rocking around the Christmas tree. The one. I'm being by name by name by name. He's right. Why? The rock on the ground in the streets. Very sexy. And a Christmas tree equals a day.

Hang on. What about Gregorian chant? Oh, I'm so lonely. Oh, my God. What are we picking? Christmas tree equals a dang what about Gregorian chant What are we picking we got to pick it How good is this come on yeah, this is good sexy. This is very sexy Show I wanted to fuck my color Colken in that scene. -♪ This will go home where you can see every time I'm with you, stop, let's just die. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. And then it started over. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,, all right, I'm beginning crack it up. All right ready. I get the oh no No, I don't want it. I've had she can hear it through the

Shut the fuck up. She can hear it fine. Shut up Let's do it on your speaker if you like So glad you took that from her I get for it. Move over to all right. Here we go. Wow back it up, bro. Ready? That's what your own rules Take you look you off take you look you up scopes Oh! Oh! Oh! Yeah! Oh! Yopo!

Oh! Look at his face! Look at his face! Wow! You were just sitting on the window, right? When you hear voices singing, Let's be tall and be tall dead, the ass is the toilet, he's getting mad.

This is the Slepperspa's right playing her dick. She's steady fucking him, put up, someone put a Rudolph goes on. Oh! Yeah! Whoa! Scuffle! Wow! With thousands of hearty walk you around With riskless tree have a happy holiday Hey, but hey, but hey Everyone bets in Marley in the New Year Oh, flash up

Woo! Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Oh I love the great gift. May I say this? First couple of second, my gift to pass three years ago. Elmo, Elmo, and logo, go so. Go go, go. Louis, I think I'm having a struggle. Louis Gomez. Go go, go, go. Louis Gomez. I salute you, motherfucker.

Yeah, three years ago, go post taking my gift. By the way, can I just say the fish, the dude, the fish? Can I just say notice where she returned to? There is sexual chemistry. Yeah, like a rumble, a rumble. She went right back to to to Lewis. Right? She knows who daddy is. Yeah. Have you ever hooked up with together?

Yeah, I was wondering. Not yet. Not yet. Now, who would be are you saw but Dom? Both will you slap him around and teach him a lesson? I would Wow, I'll fuck you up. We do it right now They're him sat me around this like please don't you want it? You want to you want to get no choice But how is your take down defense because I will fuck she's like I got sprawling brawl all day

I'd love if she put you in a fucking camora. Triangle choke. Yeah, it just made you suck it while you were dying. You put a guy in the back. All right, well that was a, you know what? How you feeling, buddy? I'm feeling fantastic. Did you fluff up?

Hey, buddy, how good does she smell? Amazing. It's weird. I've never smelled that goodness. Oh, it's delicious. Well, that was exciting. She's wearing CK1, it exciting. She's wearing CK1. It's for both.

Louis CK1. All right. So now we're going to, all right. Well, listen, I think this is another successful Yankee swap. Very, very good time. I want to say to each and every one of you, Scopo, List, Depot, Dan, Lewis J J and Tim Kelly Huh Santa Santa and Natasha and Natasha Natasha Natasha and you two motherfuckers on the couch. I want to thank you guys

I love you to death. It's been a great year Everybody's done great this year except for one of us and Two for this. No, but he could. It's true. He could still use it as a credit. He was on the show for a while. Yeah, through 2016. But I swear to God, I love you guys so much. And I'm so glad that we're all together. And you guys are the funniest people I know. You're the best way guys. And I'm glad we got to do this again another year. Yeah. Every year. Well, let's get carried away.

OK. But if the show goes on, that affects thing. We're going to have to go to the set. Guys, Bobby can do his podcast for 30 minutes. Bring your gaffes already. Pick your numbers. Just be fucking you know what I do with Tim Dylan. Listen, I think you got a role on the show, dude.

Sounds good. So here's the deal. I love you guys. Let's Show at least what's that audition on your show? What does that mean? Who for what? Dude, it's not in a show. It's developing it. I don't have shit yet. I love shit. What about I have shit If we get one, yeah, you'll get one. Yeah, what about seats? I mean, you're not gonna get a carpet As a gimmick I'd bring you like as you know, hey come on in and I really oh you did so good And as you leave it up like how tall are you?

Are you available and then you'd leave and you'd be like I don't know you asked me how tall I was You were sexy so much Let's do let's do it You hate it. Why do you hate it man? Why do you think it's fun? You don't like reflection? It's fun. Yeah, he doesn't like when people you use forward. He could never move backwards. Let's go. Are you taking off baby? Oh I got the other pictures whips her neck. I'm gonna take a peos. I was gonna see wet the seat You just hear the stream from the bathroom. I got to be a dick. I got to be a

That's an interesting question when you pay Do you pee sitting down or you pee standing up? She's the best. I don't know. Why would she stand up? She's more fun. It's way more fun. It's actually not it's better to sit down to pay. Is that right? Yeah, medically? No, it's easier. Yeah, that's pretty cool, right? Yeah, it's my favorite thing. It's probably one of my favorite parts. You look at stupid puppy. Right, that down. I like that. Okay, here we go. Ready? Yeah, go ahead. Stop. What do we do, Joe?

You say your rose is your highlight of the year. Your thorn is your low light of the year. And your seed is what you're looking forward to going into the next year. Okay, my rose this year would have to be my son. Yeah, he was born three years ago. Come on, natural fucking development. Just the fuck up, Bob. Yeah, cheek answer.

Bullshit. Well, that'll be your seat. Let me, let me, let me, my rose this year. I know what I know what my rose this year would have. What's the sex and drugs and rock and roll show? My rose this year would have to be my wife. Oh, that's really sweet. Okay, my rose.

My rose. No, my rose this year, I really would say. It would have to be my, I mean, my wife, my kid, my family. I've never been so grateful for what I got this year. Yeah. Then coming home and Maxi runs out, you know, I'm a piece of shit. I never thought I'd be married.

I never thought I ever kid. I never thought I'd be happy. I thought I'd be just some dude trying to get pussy for the rest of my life in some shitty apartment in Harlem. And you know, all that, not you. I mean, what the fuck was that about? You piece my life in some shitty apartment in Harlem. And you know, all that not you. I mean, what was that about? You piece of shit. Cause I lived in Harlem.

You looked directly at me. You look like a shitty apartment. And I walked, you walked on it. That was an accident. That was an accident done by God. But I, uh, no, I just, I'm very happy about my wife and my kid. Thorn, my thorn. Even though we know it's Lewis, you can't say Lewis. It's all it is.

It's not Lewis this year. I've been very happy with Lewis this year. I'm killing it. I'm going to be really good. Not you. I'm particularly having a good year. It's the best one. Yeah, I know.

But that's not what we were saying. That's not what we were saying. You're saying you're a thorn in his oversized side. Natasha is feeling my thorn right now. I love his good year is his peak and he doesn't know it yet. Ha. Maybe it's maybe it's my peak. I would say my thorn this year would have to be,

yeah, it would be sex, drugs, getting canceled. That was a good gig. I really liked it. That's my rose. That's so weird. And... Yeah, hi. Bobby, someday you're gonna look back

and see that that's the best that would ever happen to us. I mean, Americans, I mean. That's funny. That's funny. And my seed would be... The show. The show's gonna be the part.

I would say, no, I would say that I wouldn't look, I would like being able to develop something with Jim St I wouldn't look, I would be able to develop something with Jim St now because of TV and like FX and all these other networks. The Whartscreens now. I could, I could, I couldn't fucking do a show. So I'm very happy with FX and that's really cool.

So there you go. There's my seat. Good seat. All right, my rose is finally befriending a comedian who is not just a good friend, but could also help me financially. That's been really big for me because it's fun being here and carrying the show, but That's been fun, but there's no real money. I got an Apple gift card one year, but then

As the show got more successful we got less gifts from The one cuz you showed up less so I'll cuz I was doing my rose showed up last so uh... because i was doing my rose uh... that's a square i want to change my rose not too late and that you have to do five roses already you've got a bouquet over there uh... well i got bouquet oh baby i'm on fire uh... so yeah europe european door was my rose and then my thorn

was uh... reading that bobby sold a shell but it wasn't the one we were working on together. That was kind of a yikes. I thought it was actually have to talk about that. Oh, really? Oh, great. And not anymore since it's a thorn. And my seed was when you promised that I would be your psychic on the new show that was really big. So that's sweet. I never did that.

Yeah, I remember. Oh, I remember when you told me he said that. I forgot. I never. No, he did. he called me right away Have you seen his acting Joe always calls me. Oh good actor. It's a lot of blinking but it's pretty Yeah, he went to Norton school North Blink 20x Scopo Rose you miss Lauren Lauren Rose Mr. That much oh Rose I don't miss her that much. Oh

God, no, we don't want you to go last year. That wasn't a real seat. It was a goof seat. Can I give it? Her relationship with Dave Smith Do last night they were fucking I mean I am walking eyes Lauren make it out. I didn't make out, but they probably did. There's no way they did. Absolutely did not make out. The body chemistry that they had, my second favorite movie, was unbelievable. You do it all skidim x-foot.

Yeah, that's right. Yeah. Listen. If you got to be on the show, you got to fuck them. You can't just give up. Dave Smith is a good rose. Lauren had a tough year. I had a really tough year.

She swallowed this with seed. Um, Rose is being single this year. Yeah. Lauren is getting divorced. And I don't know. What you're seeing. You're seeing. See this is a thing that cops put dinner What is it? He's political Yeah, I had a tractor it'd be very accepting of any opinion you have politically I sign on to do the show. You can't. You got Scopo out of here.

Yeah. And that'd be your way. Wait, wait, this is you were only even here less than a year? No. Yeah. Yeah. Let's go. Let's go.

We'll also this bit us. Hi Chris. Well, if you try, I had like four big punchlines. Yeah, I don't think about it. And you've had like four big punchlines. Yeah, I'm one. I don't think about it. And you've had eight since in the middle. I would know and know you were writing for this bit. Yeah, this segment is the best you've ever done.

Would you have fucking Mark Norman Hellman. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let it go. My rose was 10 minutes ago. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was very lovely. Was that your sausage? Whatever it was, it was delightful.

Did you like it? Something's going on. It was very good. Yeah. Did you fill up a little bit? A little bit, a little chub. Did you like it something's very good? Yeah A little bit a little chub. Did you feel I'm feeling up a little can I say this everybody else work on your answers now? I'm doing Joe. I'm just gonna be honest once we get to the comics. It's gonna be big My thorn up and get off his lap I like it big. My thorn, uh, and get off his lap. Yeah. It's okay.

We got a mediocre packer. It's an okay size packer. It's not big. I'll tell you this is very colorful. How do you? Yeah, it's weirdly colorful. I got a colorful too. I got a, yeah.

His dick look like Italian ice cream. Neapolitan. It's delicious. It is. All right, guys, what else you got? Thorn probably be depression. I don't want to do that. Oh wow make you know fucking make us Hey, you know anything from mine. No, I got serious got nothing out of you fuck. Well, I'm sorry

I don't have a family or a TV show to look for you, but I went dead serious and got a bunch of laughs Let's go let's go let's go. I my see is this next next year doing comedy just growing. I don't know. Yeah. My Rose. Did you say am I see or my see? I don't know where to see you get over that one.

There's like the magic beans that Jack bought. It's like yeah, they're gonna work with it. I don't worry. I think I just chip my tooth on a candy can. Please tell me it's a fun to I have. I have got to know that we're all quiet and I can hear everything I'm dying laugh. This is great

Who's next Dan? No, let's save Dan for laughs. Why? Cam's headliner Skip my house my my my gonna go to Lewis next. Thank you. My rose is and I'd be very honest my new Podcast on gas digital Tim Dylan's going to hell He's a piece of shit. Which by the way, this is not right. I know, it's not fucking the right cast. It was great. I'm just saying, that's my roast.

Hold on. Hold on. OK, my thorn is that my new podcast Tim Dillon's about to hell. Our guest is only grown 150% in the last four months. And my seed is that on guest digital Tim Dillon's going to hell I feel like we can really rate reviews and subscribe live if we didn't study did he grow you? I'm just saying I want to have I'm gonna have a relish here this next year and I'm just saying scans for life. Thank you

Yeah, do the exit the mouth I don't know. I'm a fucking adult. I don't do it in gestures fucking drawing yourself fucking asshole Kelly what are you back just in time? Beautiful. I've got from Ellis prepared. So my right You take it Kelly was just listening to Rex. She goes like this. I'll be right there. Callie, do you stand or sit?

I'm just kidding. I spray. I like her. Callie, what do you got? Oh my god, I just want to see one nipple. My rice is, I have a new nephew this year. Oh, congrats. Yeah, many ones.

What's his name? Oh, that's a real one. That's my go-to joke. Oh, congrats. Yeah, many ones. What's his name? Oh, that's a real My go-to joke My phone is is that I can't wait by the way what buddy? You just fucking hates her guts. I don't like him mom Can't she stay in the United States of America? She's just not funny. Why is he Scottish? What is her nephew Scottish? Hey is it if you got it? Strangest thing. Hey, check it out.

He wants freedom from her. Put your thing back on. The thorn is, I mean, more financial debt that I have ever been in my whole life. Give her some money, Bob. Come on. You make more money than you and you make more money than you and you make But you have a family you too you guys make way more money than I don't make more money But maybe now that your show is canceled. Yeah, you make way more money Lewis offered me $9,000 a month to take the podcast

This network you should why don't you make it more when number one? That's not true. You're not making more than I offered you You have a knife I'll go for night Because I know how to do this hey I'll go for 9000 what about now? Yeah, what about nice guy? I'll leave right I'll leave right gas for 9000 all right I started guess is you I'm 400,000 dollars I've been $400,000

So I'm sorry gas digital, that is in Lewis Box. But they have a good value. They're exchangeable. It's a lose. You got to bonus this month. Wait, what was your thought? You get a million Lewis Box. If you use this at the comedy club

that I'm opening in around three years, by what? 20 of these are good for a guest set. I want to know Kelly's seed. My baby shitter will babysit for you if you ever have kids. Oh my seed is I'm looking forward to having a look clear mind next year to Wheeler up to the stage you just rolls I'm trapped in my own I'm trapped in my own money Is that what's the fucking book from Oscee Metallica? That's based off the book. Yeah Johnny.

Dibbo what he got Dibbo what he got. We gotta go Dibbo what he got. All right, so my my Rose's math my seed is writing literature Anything creative? My phone is my Rose is I got my first blowjob this year. What was his name? Oh Natasia. My first blow job this year. What was his name? Natasha.

How was it? It was great. Did you come? All over the place. All over the place. What? In her mouth? Kelly, how was that not your thorn?

People did she swallows, she spit at you. She swallows. There's tears like garbage. She, it's your swallow, she's spit at you. She's swallowed. Oh, good girl. Yeah, this tears like garbage. No, she's like avocado. Dude, I hate when chicks do this. I love when a mom really loves it, her son like that. Ooh, what? I got an ed up.

Oh boy, Ethel. My thorn is I got into a kind of argument with gnome, a couple like a half a year ago. Yeah, I thought I was done in show business, but. You never even started. Done in show business. Yeah. never even started Done in show business How is your thorn not those fucking videos that you play I mean Seed looking forward to taking over producing for why could WD

I think that was a threat to Yeah, I think that was a threat to I know he's doing a good job. Lewis. Lewis you go ahead. My rose this year, yeah, it's starting gas digital. It's you know Bobby Kelly, you gave me advice a while ago. Are you like to start your fucking on thing? You know what you're doing here. Yeah, and it's been phenomenal. I didn't say to come on my network. It just gets great.

It's great. Guest is a network.com. I'm going to do happen development. And no, but I'm gonna be honest with you, it's something that I think is really cool that I get, after I die, this could be a company that exists and my kid could fucking have something, like we only have fucking jokes. We only have as much money as we can make, but I'm trying to create something bigger

than, you know, in comedy, I think. This is a standard oil. The D'Arrakah fella is better at that. You say something bigger than comedy? Yeah, for like my kid. Yeah, right. What are my jokes going to mean after I'm just asking it quite calm down.

Why are you fucking snapping? I just didn't hear you. And then my thorn, my thorn this year, you know, I think co-parenting and learning to, you know, be a good parent while we're broken up and trying to get along. It's been a little bit of a challenge. Yeah, you know, that's her now calling Natasha. Yeah.

We answer it and go, what's up, daddy? And then my seed, yeah, I mean, look, it's also guess. Tim Dylan. That hopefully Tim Dylan makes it. No, we know. But you know, we should have been going on. We just signed Bisming on to a show. I just signed Bruce Buffer on to a show. Oh, we got you know, we know you got going on. We just signed bisming on to a show We just signed Bruce Buffer on to a show. Oh, we know

Another another big show that we're announcing next week. Yeah, it's big. It's huge Which makes me And there are and we know what we're gonna get a new accordion door for the studio My road your your studios in another dude's apartment at least my studio is in my partners apartment Yeah, but you're just using I'm at a dude's place. I guy is eating pasta on the couch on Netflix. Well shows going on. God That's pretty cool. Ralph does a very high-car low-carb diet. Yeah, I said pasta Never-ease pasta. You do a caripossi makes it himself sushi. He does fuck easy. Great. He's a classic. I you done

My Rose just the smiling faces of fans. All the fans like it to meet. They're supposed to be laughing, Dan. Okay. Joe. You see? There's no good. Damn groupies and hook up with them. All of them all the same. You like Dan?

You like Dan the best. Oh, thank you. What about the flat house? Yeah. Hey, what? Go back to my eyes, bro. Hey, there you. What about the flat house? Hey, what's going back to my eyes, bro? There's a big penis. You know, it does not. It absolutely, that's a myth. Alive. The fact that you have to cut him out of his shirts because his head's too big. My expensive, it's an expensive

thing. My thorn is loose. That's a regular, that's a triple X elf hat we got. It doesn't even kind of fit. My thorn is Lewis starting gas digital. I thought we're gonna keep this a family and, you know, Joe, you know, for dance odor with dance odor coming this spring, it's coming for the joke. I love it. And my seed is a show that Lewis and I wrote.

Hey, if Ralph dies, what happens? I own it all. The apartment? That was the ultimate Bobby moment. Yeah. He's like, um, and my seed is Lewis and I, and you're like, Hey, what's up with the thing? Right as he reveals that him and Lewis are writing a thing they're excited about. I'm sorry.

Yeah, it's okay. We're done. What you see? It was a compliment to me. It was, but it's gone. I'm sorry. Nice work, Bob. Come on.

Don't be a baby. No, Bob, I'm a baby. Yeah. Come on. We should have one collective seed that Bobby's a little more thoughtful and less kind of a foliage. Yes, I like that. You say bully again, I'm gonna take you fucking money. Teach you what a bully is, you fucking little boy.

I see it as a stop fighting. Hey buddy, what you see it? No, I'm sorry. No, what was the seed? I thought I fucked that, but I'm sorry. My new podcast coming to gas digital. What's it called? It's called dance order. Yeah

Yeah, with dance over with dance. No gas. No gas. Just me dancing And you can't even hear the news. You just dance on his own characters to each other. They have conversations with each other It's my own man I'm logged in and then after the episode three I kill myself and I cause it But is it Ralph's closet or the studio's Cloud will be eating their in care pasta watching my feet dangle Whatever pipe I lose is gonna go to Ralph. He's like we got a growing business people gonna kill themselves in the apartment It goes Ralph. You got to let him up to kill himself. I got a three third

Taking all of this all right. We're getting the fuck out of here. All right, listen, guys. Oh, what's your name again? Andres. And Matthew, guys, thanks for coming on. Do you have a fun time? Of course. Thanks for joining again. Thanks for coming on, buddy. You got it, buddy.

Nice meeting you, Natalya. I want to, I want to, no, I want to get into the same. Thanks to you guys, Bubba. You, that was so nice of you to come in today. You're the best. Thank you. Where can we go to see you? Where can we do all our fans?

Because you can have a lot of them. You can find me on Twitter. It's Natasha Dreams Act. And you can go to my website, www.NatastiaNATASIA. That's dreams.com. Now, like somebody was in your town, and they wanted to call you up and maybe meet up with you. What town do you live in?

In New York City. Oh, that's cool. Is there a number of something I'm getting? Yeah. Just Google me, baby. All right, baby, thanks for coming on. You're the best. That was just as baby.

Hey, Joey, what do you got, buddy? Oh, sorry. Herpes. Tiny mouth. Small mouth. BDIs. Pacey skin. Co-tails from Louis.

Lacking chin. Lacking chin. You guys done? Nope. Receiving heroin? off BDIs. Pace is again. Co-tails from Lewis and Ken. All right, you guys done? Nope. Receiving heroin. I don't know. Receiving heroin. That's a miss. We are dead.

A tiny chest. I got a good chest. You got a great chest. I think I should have right now. Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it.

I'll bring in sexy back. Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it! I'll bring in sexy back here. I'll look at that. Do it! It looks like a 1930s farmer that's about to get into a fist fight. It looks like somebody that isn't very good at sculpting made in this body. He does look very amish. It looks like the body you start off with in UFC before you exercise.

Yeah. Anyone else want to take their fucking shirts off Yeah I was there not a Joe show right now what the fuck Yeah flex off right now. Yeah, she's got it. Good all right Lauren got took your shirt off What do you got flex into the camera Joe into the camera right there behind you right there give it to go to that camera Yeah, now you flex into the camera Yeah, she wins dude. She wins on everything Yeah, she kills you Joe what about skin color?

All right That one what do you got? I think it's a plug. Yeah, well you missed out listen me out Tuesday's with stories coming to gas digital very soon Nothing again Now the offers off the table now There's no more offer we're making great money. I know how much money you told me how much money you're making great money I was the same as one fifth the listenership is yeah, that's a long Cancer but on the air 15 years Listeners in your first year

Yeah Look him in fucking I love On the fucking Dan let me do it then Fucking don't like Lewis I gotta go to my How do you feel about me? I like Guys tyranny you're fucking idiot. You know last digital put all your money in his basketball All done guys dad dad digital there's stand-up labs there's rye cast I just I gotta go to my serious out of that radio

General money I'll be in helium and fill it out for years I can't I can't say it's a phone. Gotham comedy club. Not you yet. It's his fucking plug. Shut the fuck up and let him plug. I've got to get in between you guys fighting.

January 6th and January 7th. Gotham and Helium comedy club. Tim, what would we be really reaching out to you? Can I have some please? What do you got? Bigly. Helium and Philly and then Gotham and New York. Five.

Oh, and Billion. I gotta go. Not get the fuck up. Billion season two. I gotta go not get the fuck billion season two premieres February So I can't wait to see it. What a great show. One of my favorite shows. Thanks. What do you guys go, ball? It's fine I don't want to follow that Just fine. I'll go Madison Square Garden on Friday Louis that Madison I mean just good good. Nothing. I got a new podcast hasn't come out yet. What's it called? Sweet buddies.

My two roommates. Yes, me, my two roommates in my room. We call it the sweet. Nothing. Because our apartment sucks. Cholis is opening for me at the Creek and the Cave tonight at 7pm. That's true. I literally, can I tell this quick, funny thing?

My book, I had to cross out Mass and Square Garden with Luis CK and write in Tim Dillon Creek and the Cave. You're lucky to be working What what do you got Tim Dylan comedy dot com new website dates are added were on the carolines new years Eve I'm I'm featuring for Dan Soder Gotham. He doesn't know it yet But I'm just straight up though. I'm just going probably gonna be real and and you know and just I'll be a glass Go comedy festival. I'm all over the world international guest digital. Thank you. Bye What do you got Kelly? I just got my website. I've got some live shows coming up with my one comedy festival your last

Your last dumb dumb relax. Lewis you may go I say it again. I'm sorry. I'm just doing my one comedy festival again this year. Okay, cool. Okay All right, what do you got Louis Louis what do you got oh Hey, you're not gonna fucking hit Natasha. Yeah, you fucking asshole. You got an Oculus Rift fucking jerk ¿Lo voy a hacer? ¿Qué haces? ¿No vas a hacer una tóssia? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces?

¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces?

¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? ¿Qué haces? Con Volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca.

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