Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Yankee Swap 2019

Episode Date: December 23, 2019

The Regs return with these years Yankee Swap! Good cheer and the exchange of gifts while reflecting on the new year! A special guest returns, a special deal is made! Happy Holidays from YKWD!  Learn ...more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Lewis likes my hat. I don't know. What the hell? Put that hat on. Not turban. You're giving the fuck away. This is a lot. Yes, it's a long. It's a long.
Starting point is 00:00:34 There's nothing happening different. Are these, are these, there's no one telling you this in shows too long? No, it's not too long. It's a lot. It's Joe DeRosa, man. No, Joe DeRosa deep tracks. It's a lot. Jody Rosemar. You know, you know, you're supposed to deep track. It's a fucking fish song. Done.
Starting point is 00:00:47 Ah. Welcome everybody. We are back crack or crack or all. I'm doing a little. Oh, you said it. Oh, you're doing a little. Oh, Bobby, you were tricked by Santa Claus.
Starting point is 00:01:03 He, uh, YKWD, Yankee Swap,A. Thorn fuck them suck them how's it go? Question question go ahead. Why is deep who here? Deep who is here? I fucking love Louis I feel like it's eight years ago. God damn it, I fucking missed this thing. Wait a second, he said the same thing. Loose this goes, was deeper hair.
Starting point is 00:01:28 Bob, you know, Bob, you had a big fucking special intro. Oh, Lewis, I'm sorry that I killed your father. He was going into my toys. He's fine, but I mean, I just feel like, you know, well, he's here. That is fine. I'll tell you, Yankees, put your hat on. Put your fucking hat on. Put your gloves on both of you.
Starting point is 00:01:51 He's here because historically, we have to give it to D.P. Was he here last year? No, he wasn't here last year, but he did give the greatest. Yes. The worst gifts ever, he gave, which was the, the most epic gifts. I mean, the one way bus tickets to Washington. I mean, it goes down in history. I stand by it. I'm sorry. I'm the recipient of the Taco Bell veggie burrito. Which, which I, I, you know, it was brought to my attention. Maybe we should bring that back
Starting point is 00:02:24 and see what he has. He told me he was not a thing I wrong. That's what Indian people think you'd give on Christmas. By the way, Deepu went out and got himself some biceps. Look at that guy. We're like deep pump, am I right? People, why do you have hair on your triceps though? Just under the back of your hair.
Starting point is 00:02:40 Never was fucking triceps. Dude, that is crazy. Hatches of hair. He's got little fucking lawn grass on his fucking trice. These people are animals in the West, but don't just cause your jealous. He's got better arms than you. That's not true.
Starting point is 00:02:51 He's not a better arm. I back to Haproly. Absolutely. Absolutely. For my weight class. For my weight. Do you think deeper is better arms than me? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:58 You're having a fat now. Yeah, my arms have always been fine. That's not the issue. No, they're fat. Not fine. I think you got the word wrong. Santa thinks you've got Chubby all
Starting point is 00:03:07 You have the armors of like a a woman Resiller you the breast of a woman wrestler. Why is that? Those are nice titties. I know what you're gonna say don't part Oh, for my damn it. Give me my life Can I please have the Pastries that I spent fucking $30 on for everyone? We're not gonna eat now what we're doing the show. Yeah, we pastries. No, we're not eat Christmas.
Starting point is 00:03:29 No, we're eating after. I want a pastry because I really did, I rushed over here to not, yeah, didn't have one. Yeah. Do you just say you're not fat? Oh, no, I should have had better arms than you, you fucking dirty Indian.
Starting point is 00:03:41 Jesus, look, you really fucking bust rapist. Go fuck yourself. What the fuck? You're looking at even let you up. I was gonna stop you from dirty Indian. Jesus, look. You really fucking bust rapist. Go fuck yourself. What the fuck? You're looking at even let you up. I was gonna stop you from coming in. At the door, I was like, no people. That wouldn't be the funniest move. If Bobby's mad, I was like,
Starting point is 00:03:53 where the fuck is deep, man? Deeper's like, fucking glue is sloppy. I, what's that guy, the Indian guy, just got shredded the comic. Camel and the bubble. Yeah, he just got, now that's, that's Roy, so it's got to be right what you can't get that shredded that fast I think it was like over a year once last time you saw a shirt look before this to get three months ago to get that shredded Vainey and all that yeah, he's probably doing steroids who cares Bobby?
Starting point is 00:04:19 Maybe you should do some steroids. We all do right. Why are you gonna be so mean low? Why are you gonna be a fucking mean? I'm gonna move What is he what do you want to be? He's in a mood He got you some here. Let's all do steroids. Let's do it I'll do it right now. Let's get fucking jacked next year at the fucking Chris at the Yankee I got I got 20 dollars worth of steroids in my Yankee swap. That's what it is this year Can I take this off this really is no? I don't like you know the deal now I'm gonna you can switch it you can switch it starting to get sick. What do you?
Starting point is 00:04:48 You like max you really out like my son Or he's like his dad Antlers put antlers on thank you Maybe funny if soars throat just close from the fucking material I First of all, let's get this out of the way. How is everybody can I go first? Yeah, I guess so it's not therapy Go the brain was fucked up. So I'm late. This table sock. Yeah, I can't I can't do it three tables that suck. Lewis is down there. I got no leg room I can't see him his glasses don't fit deep. But I didn't even think was a product anymore
Starting point is 00:05:23 And I think we should all gang bang Gabby just to clear the What you can't say that Joe? Gabby I said I think we should I didn't say let's As we call it a color flabby Gabby behind her back. Is she flabby fat? Yeah, dude, it's a chunky bitch You're fat bitch. Yeah, I like that Lewis is coming in here full fucking fashion designer. He's like, your fat, your arms are gross. They're hair on. Where are my cakes?
Starting point is 00:05:50 Who tailored your pants, bitch? I want my cakes again. I do want my cakes. I spend a lot of money. Shut up. You didn't spend a lot of money. $30 on cakes. That's not a lot of money.
Starting point is 00:06:04 A lot of cakes. What are you making? Quarter weekend. Up cakes. That's not a lot of money, a fucking quarter weekend. Up cakes? That's what they call cakes in the Bronx. Like a cake is a cake. You have multiple cakes. No, there's little slivers of cake. You got one little, you got pieces of cakes.
Starting point is 00:06:14 I got, no I got a ruler. He didn't get a whole thing of cake. You got pieces. Now I got different types of cakes and pastries. I'm with that Lewis on this. Let's bust them out. You know why I'm bustin' up some cakes? Everyone's in a bad mood. Let's pass around. All right, let's bust
Starting point is 00:06:26 out. Okay. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have it. I can't have one. I'm not everyone. I like that. Well, you should have one in solidarity. Bobby, that doesn't really. Yeah. All right. Good. It looks like you're wearing a bib. Are you sure? This cake sucks. It just stops the time. Christmas, stops the time. Bobby, you don't watch these. Is this Apple in it? And like,
Starting point is 00:06:58 Crea, who gets Apple desserts? I'm chocolate. Some Apple. Who gets Apple? He said Apple's one of the most popular yeah for old people Which again? Your son are 77 years old huh? What say it again 67 years old try one with type what you're 440 pounds Is there some sort of math between the years and the weight like I think he's like a turtle he knows date wasn't working It's just 67. I just got to play the hits Come on just get you a fat thing is on him. You fucked up.
Starting point is 00:07:29 Oh, look at him. He can't even eat like a savage. Stop eating like a gorilla. I like riled up Joe list. I don't like fruit and things. Of course. You put fruit in your beer, fruit in your dessert. Get the fuck out of it.
Starting point is 00:07:40 You're going to full Andy Rooney. Fruit is fruit. But you're a fruit. Can I just say? I'll go. Yeah, is it good? Are you you're going for Andy Rooney root is fruit? Can I just say Yeah, is it good? Good you want to plug the place? Quick turn all right, so here's the deal guys we gonna hard out with this Alfred here. What time are you gonna leave? I got therapy. I can't miss it. I my grandmother died. I'm very sad. Thank you
Starting point is 00:08:09 Give it to me. Give it to me. Give it to me. Give it to me. Okay. All right. grandmother dies. What? Okay. Of course you're sad. Your hand feels warm. Thanks, dude. Do your grandma your grandma died? Who cares? Do is a grandma. That's what they're supposed to do. It's the only thing of note that grandparents do. That's right. It's bad birthday cards and death. They get better. They actually take care of you when your mom or you don't have a dad and they're there for you and they show up at certain things. We're talking white grandparents. Yeah. Oh, my white, my white, yeah, it does things. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She does a lot of things besides die. She was like my mom for a long, a long, long time. Yeah. I called her mom actually. They're better than a mom.
Starting point is 00:08:43 Better than a mom. Absolutely. What's better? A slam or a grand slam? A grand slam. A grand slam. Look at us back together. Look at us. A slam at a grand. God, just took the band a couple minutes and then we're jamming. We should slam deep. He's here with his jack arms, Mike. Just come out on Johnny body. Mike, stop shaking while you're eating your muffin. Would you? He's freaking me out. He's full of joy. What are you doing? I'm just taking a peek at which.
Starting point is 00:09:09 You already took it the worst. You took a peek. They're all pretty bad though. Yeah, it's a terrible choice. It makes it easy, not to. You're welcome in pieces of shit. It's terrible. You should've got cookies.
Starting point is 00:09:18 Everybody's got cookies. It's solidarity with Bobby. Thank you, buddy. You're the best. You look good. Yeah, that I don't look good. I just sit there. So let's not get carried away. I've been shoveling food. I was in L.A. last week. So I still got somebody. Really? Not the phony in you. Yeah, I still got a little
Starting point is 00:09:32 phony. I go, you look great, Bobby. I just listened to your last episode. It's dying. Lap. I was telling everyone I know what episode was that? It was the one with, uh, where we changed Christmas gifts. Then anybody started goes, Andy has the whole podcast, circle friends with everyone. Friends with everyone, Dan. Wow.
Starting point is 00:09:50 Hi, do you need a neighbor or a friend? Would you do a smash hit of Dan fake laughing at LA Comics jokes in their podcast? I actually had, I did, I actually had, I had a good one. Whoever edits that together, I swear to God, I will fucking give you free pastries from Pukodot.
Starting point is 00:10:06 And I will give you better cookies from somewhere else. I'll give you free tickets to a show. Hey, do you think he was out there just fake laughing at a lot of people? Oh, show. There's people we know. Come on, son. You think so?
Starting point is 00:10:18 For sure. Oh, yeah. Oh, burp. No, that was Joey Diaz had fun. Santino, Andrew Santino's podcast was a lot of fun. Yeah, who else? I did some like it. Well, I haven't had to come.
Starting point is 00:10:46 Well, Joe came in heads up on the train. He did, he was stuck. Train with a second. Hey, hang on a second. Depot, anytime, just throw in. Is my mic on? Your mic is on. This is the first time you're on as a guest.
Starting point is 00:10:57 I, the whole dynamic has always been like, when they are here, I just have to shut up. So, I get it. So yeah, that's why we invited you to sit here and shut up. No, I brought, I'm here because I brought a gift that shows how much I care This whole podcast would have been worth it. You know this table will be worth money. Just all our blood on it Oh, dude Lewis looks like a low-ranking mafia boss. If he does shoot you sign your name Just sign initials in your blood on the table so we can raise some money for our families me and Lewis's family.
Starting point is 00:11:25 No one's buying these tables. They stink. I'm just a IKEA garbage. Why? Lewis, why are you in a bad mood? You know, man, just the holidays. Why do the holidays put you in a bad mood? You're going to sun you, you bought a crib.
Starting point is 00:11:39 A fake tree I saw looks beautiful. Yeah, my factory is fire. It looks good. I have the nicest Christmas tree out of anybody that I know. By fault. It's not true. You said it about everything, about everybody. That's not true.
Starting point is 00:11:50 Everybody, everything. Yeah, that's true. Anytime you get something, it's better than anybody. Let's see a picture of your tree at home, Bob. I just got it last night. Oh, tree off, tree off. I'll do a tree off. You want to do a fucking tree off?
Starting point is 00:12:01 Yeah, I picked it. Yeah, all your fucking sick of fan puppies over here are going to vote for your tree. So whatever. What do you mean sick of fans? You have sick of fans? You're not a new word. You're a new word. So.
Starting point is 00:12:12 Faggot tree off. All right. What'd you say? You're a fake. Faggot tree off. I like it. Faggot tree. I like it.
Starting point is 00:12:18 Yeah, it was all right. That's right. I swear the vote, dude. I swear the vote. What are you eating? I thought you were in solidarity with me. Well, I found that piece of banana for earlier. He's like, oh, it's some of Joe Rogan's Alpha Brand.
Starting point is 00:12:29 You know, I met him when I was out there, so I got to just take a nap. I didn't get to do it. I got passed over for Rogan. He's got an on it tattoo. I go, guys, I've been doing a lot of meditations in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Do you know what I was just soaking in my tank for a half hour
Starting point is 00:12:44 and then I got up and shot a bow for around 20 minutes ago that's weird I just shot a wine in Africa Joe oh my god I love elk meat I just ate something in the car I make my own elk venison dude I'm voting for Chelsea Gauber she's awesome I love I love jalapeno animals that's what I'm gonna do now is that real okay I have to do now. Is that real? I don't know. Okay. I have to give him a whim-hoff breathing, you know about this guy? Wim-hoff? Yes, a cold shit. Oh, is that the guy that goes out into the fucking tundra and goes...
Starting point is 00:13:13 Yeah, but doing every morning, taking cold showers. With that mouth? That's the very smell. Yeah, that's right. He meets this guy and goes, I never intended for someone with such a tiny mouth to breathe And actually creates a laser seam of beam of air. You're going to kill yourself. You're going to kill you. How long have you done it? Several days Hold it. Well, you didn't tell me to hold it. Oh, you can do whatever you want. We're working. It's a working
Starting point is 00:13:43 Navi is pretty good today that she was last week What the fuck cause we called her ugly for a whole episode. We didn't she went on a facial Not that I get terrible. She looks good Don't you think gang bang Gabby's a good name though. I'm just saying If we did it it would be good I mean if we're a biker gang, where did you get those glad? Those Gabby flashes look not done Are those, are those, are those, they're not the right size because they don't fit in your ear. Take
Starting point is 00:14:08 your hat off. Where did you get not resting in the right place? I tried them on my girl. I like that. I tried them. I like them. Louis. The ear isn't in the ear hook. You're holding on to the back. I sketch in those glasses. You're going to break them. Break them in a big expensive. Why would I break a glass glass? Bobby, there's 20 bucks in it from me if you snap those in half right now. They're expensive. Shut up. You look good.
Starting point is 00:14:30 Nobody cares about your expensive glass. Oh, look at you, Bob. How do I look? Do I look good? You look like a fucking pro poker player. Really? I think things are moving too fast. I want to bring it back to Wim Hof, breathing.
Starting point is 00:14:42 I go to Wim Hof. Yeah, Joe really introduced some boring ass topic. We're all having fun, bustin' balls. I introduce Gang Bang Gabby, and then you switch to the Flabby Gabby. I just call it Gang Bang. I want to say Flabby Gabby works off the tongue better. Gang Bang Gabby.
Starting point is 00:14:57 No way! I love when he gets more accurate. When Dan gets mad, he pronounces his aura is really hard. I love that. That's right. Flabby money maker. Flabby Gabby as an as of now is more accurate, but we could change that. That's very strong.
Starting point is 00:15:13 Do you understand this? It's a big possibility. People came here to kill us. You understand that's a huge possibility. I just want to say this on behalf of everybody, it would be a funnier bit if you killed yourself. I would. I just want to say this on behalf of everybody, it would be a funnier bit if you killed yourself. Hi, man. Hi, man. We can all agree.
Starting point is 00:15:29 Yeah, please. If you just stick a random mouth and shoot those down, there's right under the ceiling. Dude, you just go, go, go, go. Joe just sitting in Alan's office with speckles of blood on his face from a good shot. And he's going, Alan goes, of course. You could take out one of these guys to replace you
Starting point is 00:15:47 Deepook kills himself in front of me, but I'm still talking about my grandmother in third place No, that's deep who's brain, but I want to talk about my name How old is your grandma 49 The list family fucks really Our accident, ah you motherfuckers. No, I don't know 80 I think she was 80. Just turned 80. How'd you die? I don't know jumping out of a fucking Boy, time bad boy time. Hey, you got you got her cubes and you're fucking neck you weirdo Yeah, dude. She was doing she was doing bear-knuckle boxing. Yeah
Starting point is 00:16:23 Whole foight whole foight glenist list any day in the parking lot she was doing a bear-knuckle boxing. Yeah. Whole-foyed. Whole-foyed Glennest List, any day in the parking lot. But yeah, Wim Hof breathing it. Would you do more like this? I'll fight you, but it'll be. Toini Mouse. The Toini Mouse. The Toini Mouse.
Starting point is 00:16:36 The Toini Mouse List. The Toini Mouse. The Toini Mouse. The Toini Mouse. You're never back down. You know, you big mouth people. All they took a lot of shit for we. Toini Mouse was to to you for us to worry
Starting point is 00:16:52 We've always had a problem with the solvents Their mouths are big and they took a lot of large taking loads points of potato Shit I'm just... He didn't want to put teeth. You're not... Swetting. Oh shit. But if she meant a lot to me for sure. Having a hard time. Back to win, half-free thing. Who got you on it?
Starting point is 00:17:20 Not a grandma. No, that's how she did. She was taking a nice shower and slipped No, this guy. I don't know some guy named Tony out in Albuquerque he blew me and said hey, you're gonna this is gonna really help you and I made it the part of it The below jump and spice it up, you know But they told me about it and then I have been watching these videos doing the Wim Hof breathing. It's pretty fun It makes you feel good. You start to get like hyperventilates might not be for you, Bob
Starting point is 00:17:44 But what the fuck I was listening. It makes you feel good. You start to get hyperventil, this might not be for you, Bob. But what the fuck, I was listening. No, you're saying any type of breathing. Fuck you, Lewis. It's real good. You breathe, then you can hold your breath for like a long time, for like two minutes. What?
Starting point is 00:17:55 And then you take a nice cold. You can't hold your breath. You can't hold your breath. Time for a minute. Get a timer. Tell me, were you doing it right now, ready? I got it. You got to be into the breathing.
Starting point is 00:18:02 Gabby, hold his nose. Let's go. Stuck his head out of the water. I got to do the breathing first, you see. got to be into the breathing. Gabby, hold his nose. Let's go. Stuck his head out of the water. I got to do the breathing first, you see. Can you go into the room and do the breathing? Do it, do it, do it, do it. Ready, hand, go. Pfff.
Starting point is 00:18:17 Go. Start the timer. I'm believing. I did, I started it. Hey, hey. He's gonna cheat. I got it now, he can't cheat. This word Gabby and deep who fall in love.
Starting point is 00:18:27 Oh my god, do you imagine that? You stop it. Just you know you. I'd actually get literally angry if deep who fucks gaby. Why? I'd be pure. If you took that dirty Indian deck, my ticket is spotless,
Starting point is 00:18:39 except for one spot. Prove it. Prove it. Wait, man. Why do you guys don't have spots on their dicks? Yeah, I have a pearly papule that showed up one What the fuck is that it was just I thought it was an STD, but it was just a random thing that pops up a pearly papule Yeah, you can look it up pearly papules run through pepper picking I know it's taking you know you got a minute and a half dude if he fucking passed out you got a minute
Starting point is 00:19:01 Have squeeze that little nose. That's it. That's a glad I can do it right now, but fucking pass. You got a minute. Squeeze that little nose. That's who that's a glad. I can't do it right now, but really get 48. 48. Perly Papioles, uh, Gladys lists an ex-oponent. Yeah, perty Papi out early. Oh, you've been hearing your fuck down. Oh, you've been hearing your who? Oh, I didn't, uh, I could have done it, but I didn't want to give deep who the opportunity to fuck. What the fuck is a
Starting point is 00:19:22 perly Papi on the penis? Perly Papi alone the penis. fingers. It was worse up close. You got cat doggy You got Worms growing out of your dick. You can grab the side wall picture block Bobby you currently have pearly papuels No, no me under the bus because you have shit on your dick Do not look you got fucking you got multiple you got like predator hair on your dick. That's oh yeah, what the hell It's been on the screen too long. That's stuff you find on your windshield of a spaceship. Yeah
Starting point is 00:19:57 We brought it back with us. What is that? Oh, this is probably poppy on the Is this guy still alive? This is probably poppy on the map is this guy still alive the brief what the fuck is I'm happy I can not get over this if my dick started having little worms growing out of the fucking room I'd lose my shit. Yeah, I'm going go nuts Go nuts one time I jerked off with That's a bit of this show where I jerked off by accident with how do you drink? by accident with how do you drink up? No. How do you drink up?
Starting point is 00:20:25 No, no, with shampoo or conditioner. It burns. No, I think it was shampoo. And it hurts. And I didn't rinse. No, it's deep poo. That's what it was. Deep.
Starting point is 00:20:34 Yeah. I jerked off with the shampoo and I didn't rinse in the shower. And then like, or it didn't rinse well enough. I just didn't realize it was still soap on my deck, right? So you jerked off. Then like two days later, dude, it turned into fucking like, or like maybe like the next morning, whatever it was still soap on my dick right so you jerked off then like two days later Dude it turned into fucking like or like maybe like the next morning whatever was the next morning It looked like my dick had like fucking dragon skin peeling off it. Oh, it was it look like I was Was losing my shit. It was just dried soap. That's all was doggy when you woke up and looked at your dick or you like
Starting point is 00:21:03 I was doggy when you woke up and looked at your dick or you're like, huh? Oh, I think you're feeling a thinking of an STD is the fucking the best a suck sorry Joe yeah, but yours yours is doesn't peel off yours is like buying yeah yours is the forever doesn't go anywhere yeah you always have it but it only comes out once in a while like a good friend yes yeah render a mind you yeah it makes you made yeah nice friend comes out once in a while it's the same. Yes. Yeah. Friend or a mind you have mistakes you made. Yeah, a nice friend comes out once in a while. It's the same man, we're rubbing. I'll give this to you, chick. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:28 You have warts. I do, but I had him taken off. They can never go away. Once you have what you always have them. No, that's not true. Absolutely. The fact, look it up, make it correct. No, you have them take them.
Starting point is 00:21:36 Miguel. Miguel. Yeah. No, HPV goes away. No, that's that's warts of the same thing. What are you talking about? No, these are different forms of how the LuscomEcantageosum. That's that's the words to the same thing. What are you talking about? Orskeum contagiose. HPV goes away on its own.
Starting point is 00:21:50 It does not cause any health problem. Thank you. Oh, when HPV does not know, go away. It causes health problems. But I know what the case is. Oh, it's fucking Google. You fucking can't make up your mind. Assault.
Starting point is 00:22:00 Yeah. And no, that makes perfect sense. In most cases, HPV goes away in the ones that it doesn't which is the minority Yeah, mine went away you took turns and then you just don't fuck other people again probably papules Yeah, and what it turned into what does it turned into if you don't go if it doesn't go away cancer That's the one the kinds of has warts is not the cancer kind. Oh really? Yes, the warts are actually preferable. Oh good. I have it then yeah, you're good Hey, yeah, you can just peel
Starting point is 00:22:25 tears dick. You just cut those off tight. If you tie like dental floss around the root of the war. No, it's fucking. It's just fall here. You fall off and like a couple days. Yeah, give a baby shot of whiskey if they're crying. Yeah. You want to know if a lady's a witch you dream. great. You want to know if a lady's a witch you drove. She's talking, get back. I'm not a witch. Yeah, dude, I'm going to, I have a cold. I'm going to take leeches and we're going to put them on my neck. Yeah. It works. If my cousin dies, I take over his family. Shuttle or a law? Deep one, whenever you want. Go ahead.
Starting point is 00:23:03 Christmas without you. What are some Indian Christmas songs deep? Bang out. La-blu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu BANG BANG BANG BANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG SANG Dance was the most accurate but I feel like Bobby's and I were more offensive and that's why I feel like we were going for it. RING DIA SANG SANG SANG RUTU BAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAP What's the matter? It's Christmas and Christmas. You guys not have any Indian fans like you just you can say we have a lot of India I love it. I love it. Yeah, I'm a patchy. Yeah, I got some Western Sue I'm a lot of Indian fans. I'm just yeah. Yeah. They know what they have that you don't Well, I said to you more. Yeah
Starting point is 00:24:01 No, I wish I had a fan when an Indian was in my presence to plan it away from him so the snow would So Yeah, there it is wipe your mouth It's never been washed look at the other side of it. It's terrible. Oh, it's like deep skin been washed. Look at the other side of it. It's terrible. Ew. Oh, it's like deep skin. Oh, that's the grossest thing on earth. Was it last year that we that Lewis got into the scuffle? Was that two years ago? Yeah, I was I actually had the opportunity to invite another girl this year, but I instead I invited deep book because I thought it'd be less controversial unless he kills us and a
Starting point is 00:24:43 more fun fight. It would have been would literally rather have Mary Jean here Anything getting you plenty here you got plenty. Oh boy. I would love if you if a Kelly for stucco show She just came to the wall. She got me loaded. We loaded down for the roof. That coolid me. Dan, we loaded down for the roof, but we couldn't get it through the window.
Starting point is 00:25:14 Dan, we had to call couch doctor to take her apart. Shh. Shh. Shh. Pull me. Pull me. Shh. Shh.
Starting point is 00:25:23 Pull me to the roof. That was good. couch doctor, help me. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby.
Starting point is 00:25:31 I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby.
Starting point is 00:25:39 I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to be a baby. I'm going to his quats. Yeah, I think she does the flip in the tires and shit. Yeah, no she's oh Weightlifting now. Yeah, she's a female weightlifting Dude if she's
Starting point is 00:26:01 Holy fuck this cross she's just do that her instructor goes. What are you? 274 He should have hope she doesn't it depends if I have a hokey in my head if she springs a leak and fucking loses it all Shit those are the good old days Huh, no, that's okay Those are the good old days. He can call if he wants. Huh? No, that's okay.
Starting point is 00:26:24 Okay. No. I think it's like going early, that's late. I think we're gonna say it's gonna go. I can invite him over and you go. No. No, that's right. What do you say we get into this?
Starting point is 00:26:35 Now what do we do first, shall? Well, I think we should do, I don't know, what do we should do? Because the bull's gonna take 90 minutes. I say we do the gifts first. Because the gifts is the best part. Let's give it a gift. Does anyone else have sweet, that aren't those ones?
Starting point is 00:26:50 Can I just talk about that? Yeah, I just talked about it right in front of you. Yeah. I just say, why don't we just kill the roast thorn section? It's not good. It's never been good. Yeah, but that's a good part about it. It's never been that good.
Starting point is 00:27:01 And we all been, we had a year to think about it. Nobody's thought about what they rose thorn. I have. Yeah, I think about it a lot. All the time. I'm very introspective. Yeah. That's what therapist says.
Starting point is 00:27:10 Yeah. Dude. Dude. All right. So we need how many gifts out there? Looks like we have one, two, three, four, five. Gabby's gonna count. Gabby, go get the juggernaut.
Starting point is 00:27:22 Can somebody count them as a producer of the show? We need number did not well the guest doesn't have to fucking get up. Oh Gabby think she's a fucking on the show count the gifts gap and we get up and count them You need nothing trust the two guys with beards. Yeah, but I know Gabby. She does have abs I went on through Instagram and jacked off to a bunch of her old bikini photos really. Yeah, hey You have abs. Yes, you don't have abs. I swear to God. What kind of abs? From being too skinny abs No, she's not work out. She's like to naturally natural abs GBG how far back did you have to go to spoke?
Starting point is 00:27:59 No, it's pretty quick. She's she doesn't know what was the scenario you were spunk into Oh good. It was a white bikini that's why I remember white bikini okay white bikini and then what you spunk to yeah what was the thought that made you pop the thought of rubbing her flat chest it was just like this is it right here you can't have it's boobs or fat you're horrible you think you come to me if I was just on top of you shirtless If I if I could tit fuck you on pop for sure dude. Yeah nice pop I could my shave my nips
Starting point is 00:28:34 Oh dude if I could fucking loop up I feel like a little guacamole and mom so make that noise We go I could come to you like this. I like the health thing I don't know Joe's good to go. The lips. Gabo, what do we got? Eight. Eight, all right, we need a hat and we need pieces of paper and we need eight things. It's like there's been more usually.
Starting point is 00:28:54 Yeah, last year. So who's getting the eighth gift? Couple extra people. This two, four, six, Gabby's seven. Well, you're in the two, right? You brought a gift, right? Okay, and did you bring something? Okay, yeah, so how many people?
Starting point is 00:29:05 It should be nine gifts. It should be nine gifts, right? Yeah, training guy didn't bring anything. Wait, three, six, nine. There's nine. Nine gifts. Gabby, did you bring a gift? Deepo, you brought a gift?
Starting point is 00:29:16 Yep. Gabby is a gift. Is it your underwear? How could we have just Gabby's used underwear? What would all be fighting for it? It's wet. I just put it in a bag. We're, uh, Jesus. Yeah. Are we missing a gift or am I gay? We have to be missing a gift.
Starting point is 00:29:30 You are gay, but we have nine things. Uh, yeah, but do we have nine things? No, I don't. Oh, yeah. Mine's over there. Should be over there. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine. I count nine It is nine. Okay, see that's what you do. G kick. I didn't want to ask a pot head fucking how many gifts we have Does the guy be gabby? We're gonna flabbing your brains? Brainflap brainflap brainflap I think when you're in the gang bags You don't even notice numbers anymore. It's all just one it's all penises. Yeah, it's all penises and cocks I'm gonna kill myself don't know. You don't kill yourself. Why are you writing the names on it? You just read a number.
Starting point is 00:30:08 You don't write the names you eggplant. Yeah. Deepu, next year you should come in even bigger. Dude, deepu. That's the plan, bro. You just call her eggplants, but that's what, that's a racial term. Not to a white girl, but to let her.
Starting point is 00:30:20 To her, it's Italian, it's a good thing. Let's go and hide your fucking porch, Coon. Hey, I know. Whoa! Get your fucking hat, Coon. Hey. Whoa. Get your fucking. I didn't know. I didn't know. It doesn't matter.
Starting point is 00:30:29 She's a white lady. What's a porch? Yeah, fucking gorilla. Say the name of the moon crib. Did you do nine numbers? I put it wrinkle them up. No, you got to. Why are the names on them?
Starting point is 00:30:39 Multiple slurs. I don't like you. Sworas. Oh, fuck. You ever try. Sworas. Nine. You have a sore as nine. Count out now, but one through nine. I just picture sores looking in the mirror before they, episode me like, you don't know the three of them.
Starting point is 00:30:51 Because they'll see it and they'll know what I'm doing. I'm coming in hard. You guys know what's the point? Stop fucking when you control issues, Gabby. Because you know what? Just do what you fucking told. You know what's scarier than a man with no-one. She has so much control issues.
Starting point is 00:31:02 Jesus Christ, Gabby. Smashes the mirror. Yeah, Gabby, are you gonna delete the photo that Lewis came to? Yeah. You are. I gotta see it real quick if you could send it on over. I was thinking about it.
Starting point is 00:31:12 I took Instagram off my phone because I'm better than everybody. Are you from Baltimore? Yeah, phone. Gabby, ham. I'm gonna get a ham. Take it away from my phone. I love cow rip.
Starting point is 00:31:22 Bow. Bow rip. Um, find it, where is it? Take a break. I love cow rip Find it where is it dig a break? We're going big screen dude on the big screen. What so far yucky gross One okay one face to face I want the mic I could probably done it down its way further down. Oh wow you fucking scrolled Louis. I gotta find a bikini shot doggy. I'm gonna see like a little bit of the What do they call it? Where were you when you oh this was a good? Oh, you know what actually know it wasn't it was this one right here
Starting point is 00:31:55 It was a gold bikini right here. That's the one leg spread what doggy legs spread guys. What are you doing? Well, this is inappropriate. Yeah, this is like my daughter. I get it. Inattropriate. Look at the guy we love to have the dance looking at. It's so hard. What? I don't know, dude.
Starting point is 00:32:14 What'd you say? Who's really ready? I mean, it's as provocative as it gets worth. All right, here we go. Ready? Okay, Yankee Swap Joe, how does it work? All right, so everyone takes a number. Don't shout out your number, hold on to your number, don't tell anybody your number.
Starting point is 00:32:29 I'll go first. All right, go first, Joe. Got it. Got it. To get tough. I want to try and have one in my hand. Got it, I'll go second. Tough.
Starting point is 00:32:37 Go, Joe. Got it. To get tough. What's the number you want? You want two or you want one? No, you want one. Two is the worst number. One is the best. And the best and then I took eight is the second best yes We should get the gifts over here
Starting point is 00:32:52 P you P you will make room wait. It's coming up. It's coming up. I'll take these make she sits on Deep hope Don't drop those Give me Here I'll take a couple of this is heavy There why is there an exact pick one You guys see the top gun to that one's good to right there. Whoa Wow
Starting point is 00:33:32 That's what Bobby's dick looks like when you were there Christie loves it. Chris. She's a pig, huh? He gets up in there. Look at him. He's bobbed up Very jerkable. Yeah, but she has knees like Ryan Hamilton. Seven in the knee. All right, let's go. Now, what do we do now, Joey? All right, well, who's got? We sing a song just to get in the spirit.
Starting point is 00:33:56 I know we should do something. Sing a song. Fuck your mother in the heart. No, no's unfair. I mean that's really edit that out You know why cuz my aunts and uncles they watch the program. How they don't they do they do the program program I hope your aunt and uncles die next year All right, let's go all right. Let's just Your All right, let's go all right let's just Your insolent my What a cool pose
Starting point is 00:34:28 My queen I saw the caption on this one pretty cool look how I just want to say you guys are all coming into men You a little boys when you used to do now look at the size of dance head His eyes are at finally the right size apart Lewis His eyes are at finally the right size apart. Lewis Facially the connects finally we have the HBO special I know how about how successful it's good. It's good feedback's good feedback Yeah feedback if we go ready Bobby's heard feed He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to He's not a slow one. I want to turn it up a little bit you know big crossbe used to beat the shit out of his kids
Starting point is 00:35:28 Yeah, you also used to drug women in fuck of this that's built for Cosby I Know nobody knows the song the word no one he knows this all Big crossbe does is drop hits. Stuck my dick, Bing Crosby for life. Oh, really? Hit your kids. Let them know I'm coming.
Starting point is 00:35:51 Come on, go. What's this? Yes. Bollyver. The whistle, toe. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Burl-eye. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:04 But it's just like people here. Ha, ha, ha. For a lot I'm jolly Christmas and Oh my god All right Yeah No All right, oh getting weird dude. I think we don't go deep tracks Deep or tracks, you know what's a B size? These are Garth Brooks. What about blue Christmas? Christmas Did you guys know he's a pedophile? He's not a pedophile
Starting point is 00:36:52 Elvis married Priscilla when she was 14 He's not a pedophile in the 50s Buddy, if you have your period and you can fuck and make a baby, you're a woman Oh my god Stop trying to put your wife in there, Dan What kind of Viking law? You're a woman You follow Viking law And by the the way the federal government and most states disagree with you you get pubes You can oh dude. I can't wait for a multiple of your hard drives to be confiscated by the FBI first of all
Starting point is 00:37:16 I don't believe in that Back then okay, how old is she? She got a period. Hey, did she drop a blouse? Oh, old enough to crawl, old enough for me. All right. She used a tent bar for bring her on back. All right, Colonel, bring it on back. Mary, you know what they say if there's a grass on the field, play ball. Mary Christmas to me.
Starting point is 00:37:34 I got my red wings. They're on my plane, bring her out. You want to sit on Santa's lap? Sit on my lap. Well, white pants, hopefully blood will be on it. What's going on there, Presidio? You want some candy? I'm gonna get you pregnant, it'll be a baby and a baby.
Starting point is 00:37:48 Oh, baby. Sounds like a new hit. That's like a poem right there. Who's got number one? Got a baby. All right, let's go, what do we do? Should I just start? Let's start it.
Starting point is 00:37:57 All right, here we go. Here we go, number one. Yankee, no, you're not number one. Well, how do you know? Because you didn't say it. What do you mean? Let me do you not number one. How do you know? Because I haven't looked yet, I wanna look. You're not number one. Well, how do you know because you didn't say it? What do you mean? Let me do you know number one. How do you know because I haven't looked yet? I want to look here a trickster. Oh Number one. That's number one
Starting point is 00:38:15 Bobby seven Bobby that's a number. That's a one seven. That's a one with somebody forgot to throw the bottom part Yeah, dude. That's a seven is that a seven what the fuck's got number one? You go on who's got one? That's a one Who's got one Just like the ones I used to blow Oh Oh Oh Oh Slavery Doesn't matter right doesn't matter be fun just pick a guess all right
Starting point is 00:38:59 I want dance gift because he's got that fucking HBO Yeah, I Help it's a tour guys in DVD set Dan's gift because he's got that fucking HBO My Boy, no, it's a tourgasm DVD set It's panties. I'm they're gonna be in my mouth tonight Dan's gift is my panties. Yep. What did you open it? There we go Play some music. What is it? Wow What is it? A code act Luma 350 portable smart
Starting point is 00:39:24 Hey, that's cool. That's a nice gift. I'll re-gift that to my wife Who's that from? Who gave that to hands? That's nice. No, Dan is a very special person. Yeah, fuck you You know something that we should know spell bet who gave you that it doesn't know anything I brought it Lewis you can keep that or you can just get rid of it If you want just wrote up Lewis you can give it to me because I have a son. I knew you're gonna want that And you have a portable projector. Yeah, but you don't have both All right, who's loser to who's got the number two?
Starting point is 00:40:02 All right, who's got number two? She didn't want to move you in the woods. Yeah. All right, who's got number two? All right, get over here. Zach, that's his name? Yeah. Zach's snack. You want deep-oos?
Starting point is 00:40:12 That's mine. Yeah. You don't want that one, dude. All right, tell us what's in that one. You don't want this one. It is deep-oos. Oh, an iPhone! An iPhone!
Starting point is 00:40:20 Oh, shit! Somebody's an iPhone. Who's an iPhone? Let's kill him. You want to keep it or you want to straight it with Louis My god, he's already giving it away. Wow, it's the Christmas spirit Dude chill list all over it. I dropped it and I handed it to Joe Joe put it in the bag. Oh Fuck it. It was great watching your face.
Starting point is 00:40:45 I just don't know what you're talking about. All right here. What is it? What is it? Talk to the other guy for the sanitation worker exam, or the firefighter exam. Hey, that's good for Lewis. You know what?
Starting point is 00:40:56 You're going to need those. Perfect. You should definitely keep that. You know what's weird is when a joke gift turns into the origin story of your career, where he goes, and I'm going to see it, see the annotation department for over 27 years. I was producing the white GWD.
Starting point is 00:41:10 These species called podcasts. You know that they call themselves New York's strongest because the police are the finest and the firemen are the bravest. The garbage truck say New York's strongest. Really? Kind of hilarious. Yeah, pretty strongly.
Starting point is 00:41:23 You ever pick up a bag? Yeah, we pick up a bag of wet garbage. You ever pick up a bag you have a pick up a bag of wet garbage you have a pick up a bag of and ain't talking about your mother all right all right all right all right who's three who's three you're looking at everybody yeah the any soads are these these come together these are different I think right two different gifts yeah two different that one's from me this one's from you I take that you'd love that Suarez usually does drop heat but
Starting point is 00:41:51 Suarez Suarez is a nerd are you taking them you can't do that? Yeah, we can't be failed. I'm taking it a night Take it. Yeah, you can't be fucking shaking it. Yeah, taking a breath Work bitch you gotta how did you get that jewelry box? I got it. Oh, why did you get it? He always has lunch box Yes, but how did you get that? I know this is such free swag. Who gave you that? What is that miss my cell? Uh, oh, what's in it? Is there something? Yeah, that's I
Starting point is 00:42:23 If you're in sagG, you get those. Oh, wow, Amazon. Wow. That's a Poker chips. No, it's Fox coasters. What a shit gift. What a shit gift. What a shit gift.
Starting point is 00:42:34 What's your gift? That's a girl gift. Gabby wants it. Gabby just wants the carrying case. That's a girl gift. It's a really nice make up bag. Damn, Dan's gonna love that. I bet he breaks it up with Vecchio one night.
Starting point is 00:42:46 Does their feet together? You know what, we've been meaning to do that and I love it. Hi. Hi. You get to take mine? Is that what you think? Oh, you get to change.
Starting point is 00:42:56 Wait a minute, we didn't tell Zach. Yeah, he can take the book. Zach, you can take the book. You can take his projector if you want and give him the book. Zach knows the deal when he sees it. You know that, right? You can take that.
Starting point is 00:43:07 You don't have to wait. You're right now. No, it's too late. It's not too late. You go like this. You go like that. You need to see those. Yeah, he's the book.
Starting point is 00:43:15 The book. Now, now your son has a job. Yeah. Now he has a career. You don't have to give him the bug cast. First of all, I'm going to take that projector back at the end of this game. It doesn't matter.
Starting point is 00:43:30 I'm number one. What's OK? Because Zach has two. Well, if you don't, I'll do your blow. You have two of those. Why? Why? I also got a lot of money.
Starting point is 00:43:38 Because Chris D gave his to Zach too. How did Chris D give him? What did Chris D do? I don't know. He gave it to Zach. How did he get one? I don't know. I did Chris D. Yo, how did he get one? I don't know. I got mine from Comedy Central.
Starting point is 00:43:47 How did he get? He got his from Comedy Central. He got more recent in the Secret Santa. I know they get that was my bonfire. I get from Comedy Central. How did he get that? That's his from his interstitial. Yeah, that's why it's where it says that I was like,
Starting point is 00:43:58 how the fuck did you do that? That's why I was like, you knew something weird. Well, honey, you can't pay the face on. That's happening. So do you, are you taking pay the face on. That's how it is. So do you, are you taking a camera? I'm stealing it back. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:09 No, I'm not. Yeah. Lewis gets it back. You know, he's gonna give it to you. I mean, no, I can take whatever gift I want. I take the best gift at the end of this. What are you talking about? I said, you can't threaten people, Lewis.
Starting point is 00:44:20 You're not gonna have the game worked, you fucking idiot. You can't. We've done this for 17 years in a row. Yeah, you're number one. I take years in a row. Yeah, you number one I'm number one. I take whatever gift I want. Oh, I thought you're using you because I'm just bullying I'm gonna lock the door I'm leaving with all I'm
Starting point is 00:44:36 I'm taking whatever I was What a Puerto Rican what a Puerto Rican coach that very Spanish of him 70's your mean walking this gift is on you know, it's like like a $300 gift right now shot out how many central thanks for the good year It's actually below funny because he didn't pay a fucking thing for who is number four All right What are you looking for Chris? The gray My gift that's a cute little bad and this is a pot head dream
Starting point is 00:45:02 That is my gift. That's a cute little bag. And this is a pot hedge dream. Uh-oh. That's what I call this. It's my short-term memory back. Yeah. A pot hedge dream. It's a pot hedge dream.
Starting point is 00:45:15 Open that up. Open it up. Oh, snacks. Oh, man, that's a good shit. Snacks. Oh, take tack. Oh, look at that. Peepoom, big tack. Look at that. Peepoo, tick-tacks. Look at that chocolate from Aruba.
Starting point is 00:45:28 You got cookies, Dutch cookies, and a tick-tack. Look at that. Look at that. Would you stop in the airport? Oh, he wants the projector. He's taking the projector. You fucking hell. No, that's not the airport.
Starting point is 00:45:38 You can't get those in an airport. Look at how many tick-tacks. Do you really want that, or are you just projecting? No, drop them. Hello folks. Good morning. Yeah, no, have a sit-knut for a while. Pundbrose. Dude, I love stru you just projecting? Oh, drop the Hello folks Good morning Yeah, I'm just sitting on it for a while Fun bros
Starting point is 00:45:46 Dude, I love stoop waffles Oh nice Shout out to Amsterdam What are you friends with Amsterdam? Yeah, I know you're watching Amsterdam I'm just looking buddy Stop it Jesus
Starting point is 00:45:57 Alright, someone had this fucking toy still in his kid Fucking get off me dude, I'll kill you How awesome You like tic-tacs? I love tic-tacs Look at that, now you get as many tic-tacs as you want, kid. Yeah. I'm gonna pop one in for a suck pussy. I'm gonna plug Joe's mouth with one.
Starting point is 00:46:10 Those ones fit. Dude. That's not cool. All right. I'm number five. Number five. I'm taking this Latino Santa. Look at all those guys. That's my guess.
Starting point is 00:46:20 That's my guess. How did you get Latino bags? Yeah. We know. I don't know what that means. I'm serious. Yeah. I won't you hold What is it remote control vibrator designed for Solo play discrete public play long distance couples A lot of people are on the road a lot of guys so you do Girl pop this in her purse. Yeah, and you have a on your app on your phone you
Starting point is 00:46:46 go I need I need to spice up but I can use that to train my dog too See doodles bugging see doodles. Let's see doodles get in the trash when you turn on the butt I put that down I Can't wait hours continuous. I love this. This is great.
Starting point is 00:47:06 Yeah, but it's not yours. I ride on. It's mine right now. It's gonna be snatched. I want my butt. That's gonna be it. I'm serious, thanks. I want that in my butt.
Starting point is 00:47:14 I need one of you guys to control it when I'm on the road, though. All right. Who's that familiar? 10 o'clock show. You're like, oh, Danny push the button for me son. Fucking you guys.
Starting point is 00:47:24 Varys. What's that number? number you number six? Who's six? six She's a six. She's a six. She's a six. She's a six. You're exactly what you are. You know that one's gonna be a go on this clock. Sockers got good gifts. He's got a try harder than everybody.
Starting point is 00:47:40 Deep was questioning his his his gift stock. Oh, you also bomb the gift. And by the way, so deep was here for no reason questioning his gift stuff. He also bombed the gift. And by the way, so deep was here for no reason. And his gift stunk. It was a good one. What is that? What is it? Someone's going to work in the sanitation department. What is it? What is it? Stop hitting me. You see your Amish? What? Dude, quit trying to aggressively blow Bobby. Hey, nice kicks, Bob. Is this a ticket in New York comedy club? A season of VIP seasonal past in New York comedy club. Oh, nice.
Starting point is 00:48:10 Give that to Deepu, he can get down. A bunch of hoods. What's a hood? I'll take him. There he goes. Any white ones, there is one. I don't understand. I don't want the project.
Starting point is 00:48:22 You shoot with that in a plan meeting. Without the sweater. Who wants that should have that in a plan meeting. Without the sweater. Who wants that? Now, can I say? I'm not the project. Let me say something, okay? Yes.
Starting point is 00:48:31 You guys should make sure, it's stupid to take the projector, because I'm taking that projector, so you should take something that you want to keep, because you're like. Too late. What in the hood? That don't get the hood.
Starting point is 00:48:42 You should take the vibrator. I don't want it. You're a six. You should take it. What in the hood? That don't get the hood. You should take the vibrator. You're a six. You should take it. What in the hood? Can someone explain to me? I've never seen a hood on its own ever in my life. So you have a hood in your own pocket, but that doesn't have a hoodie.
Starting point is 00:48:54 So you just put it on your head? You can wear it on the plane, block it. But what is it attached to? Look, it's a cowl. It's for fashion. Yeah. What? You put it on the hood.
Starting point is 00:49:03 Why'd you attach to the gray one to his gray hoodie? Oh, it works pretty good. Yeah, I'm going to the kids seat. I'm the one asking. Good. You can wear them working out. You can wear them when you're on the plane. It's a touch hood.
Starting point is 00:49:15 That's the dumbest thing I ever heard. Well, but also good gift, though, dude. All right. What is it? There's no more seven. Seven. Seven. Oh. Where's the gift? What gifts are left? Is this one? There's no seven seven. I'm seven. Oh Where's the get what gifts the left is this one that one and that one. That's it. Yeah, yeah, and that's Gabby's no
Starting point is 00:49:31 It's not that's Gabby's yeah, and that is that's me look at this good. Oh Well, the lady told me it was tissue paper. It's just fucking wrapping paper like cunt I don't want to color it. It's a lady Good penis. I am where's Mike's gift? That was a miss maize old thing. Oh, yeah Who's gift is this is the most depressing that's a sandwich gift exchange? We've ever done on the show We've given human sex slaves. We've given fucking true Just we've gone above and beyond and this year it's a little bit discipline one year because I play you
Starting point is 00:50:03 Usually have a really good one. Also, you couldn't make it to his $100 fucking dollars. You couldn't be money. Well, sorry that I go above and beyond for my friends me too, dude. That's what that projector is. And this is a set you by chocolate tour. A lot. This was sent to you by a lot of money. Strupe waffles. Dude Bobby had a lot of money. Bobby had to give away a little bit of a soul to get them out of his hands. I spent fucking 85 on my oops. Bobby had to give away a little bit of the soul to get them out of his hands. I spent fucking 85 on my oops I'll take it. So please look in you know you take the bitch. Sorry. Touch it. Touch it.
Starting point is 00:50:32 It's all he fucking bluffed me with the paper. This is our box. He thought it was dicks. He was like what Dicks. Oh, bag of dicks. No, it's okay. It's all right. It's decent. It's 20 bucks. It says five fags. Dollars. I tell them say dollars. Oh That's supposed to say bucks That's a coffee. Oh, all right, and check it out read the other one Fuck water. She said it feels like semen and you're pussy I don't have a pussy. No, you put it on your car and you're fuck with it. It feels you have have come over You're dead. Oh cool fuck what you want to put random come on your cock. Oh, it's not common feels kind of like I have Fuck water. I don't want fuck water. No fuck what is good? Your wife is getting old. Yeah, and then you stick it in there. It's good. You say my wife pussy's dried up
Starting point is 00:51:21 I need fuck water. I'm not saying that. I'm saying you're not as attractive as you once were That's a combination of legs ¿Pues, ¿pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse? ¿Pues, puse de galitos sin conocer a nadie salir el último rodeado de colegas. Es ser el alma de la fiesta y vivir cada segundo como si faltara una hora más. Lo que sí es seguro es que canarias mezclan bien. Y cuál es el secreto, ¿no? Como el de nuestro ronareucas, el lado canario de la vida. Bebe como de la acción, esto responsabilidad mayores de 18 años. Me you can't even get a coffee at Starbucks with $1. Yeah, you can it's five dollars. I Can't even get why get a brev a lucky Water it's five fucking 75 for my day fuck water was 15 and five I would have never had no fuck water And that's a good point. That's a beauty. We talked about the fact that Bobby's locked into that gift and didn't trade it for it. Oh wait wait wait wait No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Trading I want a trade I get the train the time dude you I want I need a coffee and fuck I don't want fuck water you dude you
Starting point is 00:52:48 I take moved it on you take my get back. I'm taking that back. What do you got? I want my I get my shot if you don't take mine. Okay Okay, why can you go back you settle You said this is bullshit. I want the vibrator. That's fucking vibrator. Oh my god. I won't eat it. I'm the fuck. I won't eat it in my butt.
Starting point is 00:53:11 That is. I won't eat it in my butt. Lately unfair, everybody knew he had settled on it. This is way more, this is better the fuck water for my wife than. I know, but it was too late. You didn't do it. I did do it because you guys distracted me with conversation. No.
Starting point is 00:53:23 And then this guy just got up and walked out. I never said let's go. I feel like we should check the tape, but. You see there's no tape. We don't have tape. What do you got to run it back? We got a beauty kit from Gabby. Yeah, that's fucking bad.
Starting point is 00:53:34 Is that flow? Yeah, that's what are you going to take? What are you going to do? What are you going to do? You're going to keep it? A beauty kit from Gabby? Let's get him a diet kit from Bobby. I'm honest.
Starting point is 00:53:44 It still got off. He still got it off because it said Bobby and'm honest. It's so got off. It's still got off You still got it off because it said Bobby and diet. That's the only reason why Sugar there's good shit in there. Why did you do this? What what why a beauty kit? Cuz there's moisturizers like where you go? Excuse me right away Comes out of the mask on put SPF on his dick. All right. There's one gift left number nine. I'm number nine. You are number nine I grab it. I hope it's a safe way. Everyone knows Mike's locked in Okay, it's from Zaxlok did why do you keep saying that just let people fucking move on?
Starting point is 00:54:16 That I got I lost my vibrant because you had to put that out Yeah rules are really Rules are ring out here. We go exactly rules are really moved on. Oh shit. Okay. What the fuck yo? This is the best one. I had such low expectations for all these other gifts That's a handmade pipe from Jamaica. This is bone and this is like a tree wood like a bond from a white girl Wow, deep was about to get some books Look at that no you can't I want to say the quality of it You already have like nine. Oh, just take it just to take it. I really want a bother But I really want the projector. There's my problem. I want the projector, but I want to hurt D poo
Starting point is 00:55:01 If you don't take that pipe, it doesn't know is when he got that pipe in Jamaica The man was like this is a cursed pipe The man to put his lips to this pipe If a man sleeps in the room with the pipe he dies I'll keep it outside he goes that would be why Don't you know that's from a dangerous animal If an Indian man receives this gift we could all die I'm gonna I want the projector take the Bible get you a projector Nothing Nothing
Starting point is 00:55:42 Gabby gets nothing Gabby gets nothing. I already looked at Gabby gets nothing. Gabby gets nothing. Let me have it. No, because I'll tell you right now. This is actually better. Make it her sad. Make it her sad.
Starting point is 00:55:51 Gabby, if you, and I mean this, if you kiss me on my mouth right now, whoa, just give me a kiss. He's like, kiss on the mouth. You could have the product. You think kissing you is worth it. This is why the girls gifts that 400. This is $400. This one?
Starting point is 00:56:05 Gabby, yes. A little, it can be two full seconds of pressing your lips in my way. No, Tom. Two seconds. Just two like, look, it's Christmas time. No. What if I do it?
Starting point is 00:56:15 You kiss mush and then you keep this. If you kiss mush and then she kisses you. I'll nail you my underwear. The fuck water's so good. Well, if you give me your underwear right now off your body, I swear to God. I'll give you that's not bad Go in the bathroom. Let me wearing I'm wearing ugly underwear too. You want them? Yes, I could keep this
Starting point is 00:56:36 Do it. Let me see the throw in your body first though I don't trust that you don't have an extra bear underwear in you at all times. Who is double underwear? You an asshole ugly underwear. Let me say, what color are they? What? There it is. Oh hell yeah, don't be with the scenes. I know it, let's go. Get them off.
Starting point is 00:56:52 These are my period underwear. Ah! You just got to be a huge double. You just double the money. It's like a high c commercial. Period underwear. Whoa! Oh.
Starting point is 00:57:04 I'm gonna throw up. Does anything at all? Dude, I hope it smells old. Oh I'm gonna throw up does anything. Oh dude. I hope it smells We take them off and wear them as a hat Oh, man, sorry horns of Odin What you call them ones of Odin? He gets his pipe you know, she gets a project there Wait, did you steal these from the library? They have fucking codes on the back of them. Oh, you're to bring them back to the library.
Starting point is 00:57:29 Three weeks. Do they really? Yeah, they're from the library. Oh my god. That's funny. He told them about it. No, no, no, no, no. He put it in the game.
Starting point is 00:57:38 He put it in the game. That was great. I didn't know they were fucking rented. That's awesome. You know what, I take it back. It's a library on Staten Island by the way Turn that is great, but aren't you gonna get in trouble when nobody returns the books? I'll fucking pay for it Yeah, by the way that firefighter exam book is a hot item in Staten Island. Yep
Starting point is 00:58:03 Waiting lists for that for like three weeks. Really? I think your books are in and then it goes up and they go, you're gonna fight funny? All right, now do you have a book on learning how to read? Yeah. He actually got those muscles for that book. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:16 He has a walk in. Oh, this is my backup plan. So that is funny. You can be that fucking bombed. Yeah. I sucked to this. This fuck water is pretty cool. Yeah, well, it's gonna be.
Starting point is 00:58:24 I hope it's other guys' giz. I hope that's This fuck water is pretty cool. Yeah, well, it's gonna be. I hope it's other guys' gizz. I hope that's exactly what it is. That'd be hot. Here we go. One, two, oh, that's how small they are. Oh, they're all bunked. Oh, here we go.
Starting point is 00:58:34 And throw. Yeah. And I keep the pipe. Whoa. That project is worth $39. Whoa! On Amazon. Those are a team, hey.
Starting point is 00:58:43 Whoa! Whoa! No! Whoa! What? 39 What do they want to do with them? I'll smell them put them on my mouth and jerk off I'll be obviously I hope she just found those in the other room Don't do that Where is that? Bad, it was like pain. Yeah. Only wants you to push your straw. Then the underpants is mine. All right. Here we go.
Starting point is 00:59:13 Oh, look at that right in the nose. You're a fucking animal. You're a reporter. He's been diagnosed with a hard dick. Diagnosis in. He's hard diagnosed with a hard dick. Diagnosis in. He's hard as a rock. Oh, she's texting a member of Bon Jobe right now. I'm firing a lot of this.
Starting point is 00:59:33 She says, this is where I make my stand. How much is this project that can we bring it up? It's worth $13. It's a codec Luma350. Portable project that please bring it up. I hope it's worth a hundred and sixteen dollars Oh, yeah, they smell really nice. Did you wash them first Debbie? I sprayed them with the bathroom spray you piece of shit Yeah, you spray them down you never said I couldn't do that you spray them down
Starting point is 00:59:56 I bet they smelled musty. Yeah, I was gonna say I'm pussy I was gonna say I'm pushing through like this whole three hundred fifty bucks. Oh, I don't regret it. Wow. No way. Yeah, I told you it was a big one. You can buy a package of those underwear. That's gonna be one of Sputniknut. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:12 Sorry, that's an expensive death. This is probably one of the best project as you can get right now. Don't worry, Big J. It's probably giving you his for Christmas. Yeah, but you can put those in the studio and hang them on the wall. Yeah. Like a conquest. Yeah, well You a couple weeks ago she wouldn't even look at you now. She gave you a panties. How did Tommy slowly break it down? He bucks
Starting point is 01:00:34 Huh, County Central. I said how did Tommy Central get 350 bucks? Still making money off broad city Wow, well, that was good. I got my dildo. Unfair. You get your tick tax. Love it. Oh, my whole box of tick tax. We got deep who got his pipe. Really happy about it. Yeah. No, he didn't. The pipe pipe is the panties and the pipe. Oh, yeah. You're gonna hurt a separate deal. She gave me her panties to keep my fucking to keep that and not trade with it. Oh, you can take the pipe. Yeah, I'm getting such bullshit man. Sorry, I already clicked it.
Starting point is 01:01:07 Oh, you got some bum books. You got your books back. Yeah. You got to give them the pipe. Pass the pipe. You want to start an island to return? Wait, your number one. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:15 Oh, okay, that's why. So you get the pipe and the panties. Woo! That's a grue, I think you won. What do you think he put his mouth on that too? Oh, this is what we do with the pipe, I'm going to have some. Yeah, but he put his mouth on that? Oh, this is what we do with the pipe. That's how you'll test it. Yeah, but he put his mouth on.
Starting point is 01:01:26 That is disgusting. Hi. R-E-M-E-N-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O I don't know what work goes in her ass Let's do the anatomy of this underwear This is so fucked up This is really like I'm getting old because this is me using me uncomfortable these are I feel like I'm I feel like of a my ugly It's a non-sex yarn That's the front It used to be white that's the front
Starting point is 01:02:01 I got those since eighth grade Oh Those just chippled in valuable That's the front. I went out of those since eighth grade. Oh, those just tripled in value. Yeah. What? Oh, we didn't know this was a rookie. By the way, I will auction is off to any YKW defense. I swear to God, we're going to do an auction.
Starting point is 01:02:15 Open auction. By the way, I'll have to move to three to five. Yeah. I'm not by one of those. And have money left over to fill your pipe. I swear to God, the auction, it's open right now. Yeah. How do we auction off Gabby's panties? Well, we're going eBay Yeah, I just put them on the money. I don't know if you can tell money, but I was just whoever wants them highest bid email Sila
Starting point is 01:02:42 You got paid in your good baby girl You're good baby girl. You got paid in full. Yeah, you're good baby girl. You're good. Now you're gonna go get that 350. I mean, I hear something. I'm telling you right now guys, there are visible stains.
Starting point is 01:02:50 Yeah, those are my period under the light. Like straight up, I'm gonna literally throw up right now. Like straight up, a brownish, those look like my own. That's normal blue. That looks like my underwear. Oh, right.
Starting point is 01:03:01 Some of it's a self-cleaning device. I've seen Pussy's up close. They have like a white cream that comes out into your mouth. What? Yeah. What are you talking about? Yes. It's called discharge.
Starting point is 01:03:11 I've read about it. Broom. You can email right now if you want to go on auction and buy these the highest people. Oh, they have the chat or the people in the chat, right? No. We'll do our Patreon right now. What is it?
Starting point is 01:03:23 What is it? Let's do rkpatreonatgmail.com. Go there. Dial on auction, baby. Highest! No, you're do what's the pay what is it? What is it? What is it? Let's do arcade patreon at gmail.com go there an auction baby Highest no, you know, you're not going to Bobby's patreon to fucking bid on my underwear. It's an email It's not your underwear. That's why we're selling it like that my underwear. I own them now You know they own and whoever bids the highest will tell you and then you'll you'll get the money I trust you guys. You don't get the money not us when I get the money you have you have the underwear you're fucking dumb dumb You have the gold. I trust you guys. Well, you don't want to get the money. Not us. When I get the money, you have the underwear you're fucking dumb dumb. You have the gold.
Starting point is 01:03:47 Yeah, you have the value. Ha ha ha. This is disgusting. The nice thing is, you can get everything you want done with those. Oh, you could just come in them before you. Oh, I swear to God, it will not come with or on them or in them or I will not use them at all.
Starting point is 01:04:02 These are completely unjerkable. Do you have a Ziploc bag we can put them in? Yeah. Where is the bag? Do you have a younger bag? I'll have to go back for right now. Yeah, yonder it up. Yeah, you put it in this maple box.
Starting point is 01:04:11 Put it in this, wrap it up. Wrap them in that. Wrap them in the, the dick paper. Yeah, wrap them in that and then we'll put them in the bag. Here you go. Look at those. Does it really have a stain on it? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:04:20 Those are later, I'm not exaggerating. Well, you really wanted that projector, huh? Yeah. You know your dad's loaded, right? Yeah. you buy you 19 of those. Yeah, but that's funny But also are you just rocking commando now? Yeah, oh, Jesus Christ. I'm all about it What the fuck is Mike doing? That's thinking you up there who got all the hoods? Oh You got your hoods back return to Sunder that stinks. I'm'm sorry, dude. And with the fuck cream. You get the fuck cream fuck water fuck water
Starting point is 01:04:51 Wow, well, I think that was an epic fucking episode actually. I think deep who pulled it out at the end. I think God damn Lewis Really fucking snapped to it at the end. It's been a truth. As he always does. Showed ingenuity too. Always show you the fight with another Spanish person. I will never not make this a memorable episode. You always make it a memorable. I have to agree with that.
Starting point is 01:05:14 That's where we have you on every year. Gabby, what are you gonna watch first? I'm gonna post that glue in my 350. Oh, I'd probably miss my home. Oh. I know. What are you, are you hugging the bag? I love them. I don't ever want I'd probably miss Maison. Oh. I know. What are you hugging the bag? I love him.
Starting point is 01:05:27 I never want to auction them off. I just want to put them into my mouth and beat off. Yeah. You should, like, put them in a shirt, have somebody make them into like, you know what? They're dating. Yeah, they're dating. They're taking the dinners with them in a chair.
Starting point is 01:05:40 Sir, your blowup doll can't sit here. Is she wearing a period underwear? I'm sorry, I caught the smell of dimes. Is she the man? I smell liver. Yeah. Why, I didn't know girls have period underwear. So it smells like hot water.
Starting point is 01:05:57 Are you kidding me? No, you're just happy to be wearing your girls underwear. Yeah, you do. You weren't fucking anybody today. Yeah. Well, that changed. And Lewis's head. I mean, there's a new connection here. happy to be wearing your clothes after work. You knew you weren't fucking anybody today? Yeah. Well, that changed. And Lewis's head.
Starting point is 01:06:07 I mean, there's a new connection here. Can I call you when I jerk off? No. No. Dude, she's just gonna see your phone. It's like, Lewis. Oh my god.
Starting point is 01:06:16 Lewis is killing me today. Oh. No. No. It's over and over again. 42 minutes. Oh, this is, Lewis is going, fucking 42 minutes. Yes, yes. Lewis is going.
Starting point is 01:06:26 Fuck it back up. Ah, fuck it up. Fuck it up. Fuck it up. I'm edging. I'm edging it down to your back's up. Shib, shib, shib. It's loose, shib.
Starting point is 01:06:39 Pip, pip. Oh, dude, I love it. Shit. Dude, look at this. Oh Dude look at this is a hot bag of There are there are literal particles from her body on this right now You can make a clone of Gabby. Yes, you could if the world F***ing blows up today you can make a bunch of Gabby's with those underwear Doctor we found one remain. It's penis paper, but it seems to be period blood underwear. You should make a staff like in Jurassic Park when it's in the Mosquito. Hey, you should put a piece of these. This is used. What do you mean?
Starting point is 01:07:21 This is used. What do you mean it's used? That was the underwear. Of course there is. What do you mean? This is used. What do you mean it's used? That was the underwear. Of course there is. Yeah, what do you complain about? Look inside the bowl, Lewis. Did you use that, you'll be a real dumb, Danna.
Starting point is 01:07:31 What'd you say? Yeah, yeah, I tested it out, yeah. Yeah. I hope this vibrator's not used. Did you test this out? Check it again, I rewrapped it. The fuck water is my giz. The giz and tears from your wife what is that powder
Starting point is 01:07:48 there that's a bath salt that's a bath smoke and get fucking he's gonna actually put it on a fucking baby pig okay I don't know the best good you give as good as you had a great yes it was thank you yeah you have a one came off you You didn't realize what was going to be a gift. No, but you haven't given the gift of laughter. Also, she jogged to the podcast. So those panties are. We find if you find a guy selling those out of another fucking village,
Starting point is 01:08:17 I have to hold this now. You have the panties though. Put it in the bag with the panties. Maybe you'll mix. No, I'm not. I'm going to smell the pain smell like this shitty pipe. Maybe the panties though. Put it in the bag with the panties. Maybe you'll mix it up. This smells like the panties smell like the shitty pipe. Um, maybe the panties will make the smell like shitty panties. I can still smell a little bit of veg.
Starting point is 01:08:32 So don't you can't. Yes, I want. No, you can't. No, you. No, Lysol? What was it, Lysol? No, the air spray, I just gave him a little. Why did you do that? Because she knew she was doing it.
Starting point is 01:08:49 Because I've been out all morning. Oh. Oh man. You know what, that got Lewis like you bitch. He took some seasoning off the beef. I know, seriously. Yeah. You don't throw out the oil?
Starting point is 01:09:00 Yeah. I can bring you in. Yeah. That bacon grease is for something. Yeah. You can make, put some taste on it. You just made a roux. Oh, yeah, dude. He's gonna make Gabby tea later.
Starting point is 01:09:12 He's gonna fuck you. I'm gonna make that. You make that, let that roux sit there, become brown like caramel. Woo. Gabby, were you giving me your broth for this fuck water? I'm just gonna fuck you up. What if you really found out some real kink shit? I go, can I get a sock for some tic-tac? Why don't you crack those t broth for this fuck water? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha them. Are you sure? Yep. Are you sure? Yep. Yes. Yes, I do. I am a fucking
Starting point is 01:09:46 heavy thing because I have an Ed Sugar and so long. It's good though. But start dropping weight. I hope it's gonna suck for two weeks. It's gonna suck. Lewis got all the fucking jacked. You're gonna get jacked too. I got you. Yeah, you got you. Well, why did you get jacked? I'm jacked right now. No, you know, I'm ripped up, dude. I look fat because I'm wearing like a little bit of sweat stuff. I get to fall for this stuff. I'm not sure. I'm seeing your fat hips. I know when you get fat. You have fat.
Starting point is 01:10:08 Yeah, Lewis hips don't lie. Yeah, Lewis's hips don't lie. Lewis has childbeariness. I'm crushing pus right now in my life. Dude, I'm not saying you're not crushing women. Fuck me when I was jumping too. I'm in fat. You look good though in clothes.
Starting point is 01:10:21 This says they have some of the products in it. Add a quote trivial amount of calories total sugars and added sugars but there is zero calories zero fat zero sodium zero carbs how much sugar just said it says it adds a trivial amount of you can't say that how the fuck does that it means that there's not sugar but they have to say it in case someone talking about below the it's a trivial, meaning you're a trivial amount. You can have a tick tech. Let me have one tick.
Starting point is 01:10:49 No, dude, I don't have a tick tech. You can have a tick. Still sugar. All right, I want to have a tick. Thank you, Michael. Thank you, Daniel. Thank you, Dan. Thank you, Michael, for being in my corner.
Starting point is 01:10:57 Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Why? Does anybody want my number for that? You're not applying that I'm not in your corner. You aren't, you're trying to make me have a fucking tick tattoo.
Starting point is 01:11:05 It has a trivial amount of sugar, which is just gonna make you more angry that you're like, I can't even have a fucking... No, I was happy, I'm a friend that is supporting me. That made me feel better. I'm saying, I'm being more supportive. I'm on the fucking home. I need a lot of support.
Starting point is 01:11:20 I do, I need some support. I do, what is that? Mostly on chairs. Mostly on chairs. Mostly on a fucking. Both of you is why you fucking turn it on me? I'm helping you out, but I'm also going for giggles. Gabby I'll come in my underpants and I'll give it to you for that. Cody actually. No, Gabby I will shit in my draws and then take his common rub it in there.
Starting point is 01:11:41 I'll suck your butt for 15 minutes. I will let anyone here come in my back for fun. I'll suck your butt for 15 minutes. I will let anyone in here come in my back for fun. I'll take it. I mean, for a strewb wobble, I have to drop it. You're so bad. You're taking shit? I think you guys remember, was it last year when I showed up on drugs for this?
Starting point is 01:11:59 Yeah. You want drugs? Remember when I kept pissing? Yeah. Oh, yeah. That was fucking weird. Cooks in. Well, speed.
Starting point is 01:12:07 It was down. Speed. No, we did mushrooms and Molly and it was definitely cut with speed. Who did? Me, Ari Shaffir, Gary Vitor and Michelle Wolf. It led to the leader of the board. Hey, you fucking rat. Smidges get stitches.
Starting point is 01:12:17 Everyone else wants to fucking let their business out there. Not let them know. Hey, I got to leave. I got what I wanted. I'm DEA Dan. I'm bringing down the whole thing. I'm undercover. I gotta go to therapy shortly.
Starting point is 01:12:27 I better do this Rose of Kyle. All right, let's go. Go ahead, you go for a show. All right, Rose of Kyle. What is going on? Thorn seed. Yes, always popular every year. Every part, and Lewis doesn't think so.
Starting point is 01:12:39 Lewis thinks that it's the worst part we should dump it. Lewis go shit. I mean, yeah, why don't you go shit for like a half hour? Leave the panties panties. Oh, mean, actually go shit. Leave the panties with me. No, he's very uncomfortable. I don't know. I said, I was gonna, those panties, those panties, they were they come with you. Can I just see them again? Yeah. I can, I can, I'm a jigsac. You're taking them out like that. was that the shroud of Jesus You can see her badge you can see poncho be still away on her body minutes the panties are Louis's rose and see her Vagelines like the shroud of Jesus and the panties Oh my god, they're a stain. Yes, those are nice and thin by the way
Starting point is 01:13:20 They're like there's not a lot there. I like it really she's a monster by the way, they're like, there's not a lot there, I like it. Really, she's a monster, this girl's a monster. How dare you get it? What? Gabby, let me tell you something, I respect you so much. She wanted that checked, she don't give a fuck. You can fuck, you can literally buy it. You have the money to buy it.
Starting point is 01:13:39 I don't care. That was really cool. Do you just put those in your mouth? Put that in your mouth. You're a fucking disgusting animal. You just put those in your mouth? Luke, you please just so them into the bomb That's daddy's panties They look a tiny they are when you're tiny and tight those are ugly ones. I know
Starting point is 01:14:13 Deepen I'm thirsty right now. Yeah, thirsty for what you psycho Gabby tea Brogdon fucking big Gabby call that be great. I love to get jacked up on caffeine What if that healed everything? What if like little nicks and scars on your shins just feel like the news everybody's shoulder felt good. I go guys, I had a problem with my hip and then I had a little Gabby Pusty. Yeah. A fucking good.
Starting point is 01:14:37 Remember, I feel good. My plant, the fascia, this is gone. Joe's mouth gets bigger. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening.
Starting point is 01:14:52 Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening.
Starting point is 01:15:00 Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's happening. Oh, it's her dying. Actually, my rose. You guys not caring. That's my seat. Your grandma's death is my rose. That's my seat. The fall of the list family.
Starting point is 01:15:08 Yeah, she's fucking incredible. No, yeah, that was, um... She's a beautiful thing. I don't know. What do you want me to say? I'm currently in my thorn, like right now. I'm grieving. I'm grieving. That's your thorn, is your grandmother dying?
Starting point is 01:15:19 Yeah, my grandmother. Her life ended very recently. When was it? And Lewis is making light of it. Where was it? Three days ago, Doc. It's a long time. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:15:29 I thought you meant your previous grandma, I'm sorry. No, no, my current grandmother. No, that is his previous grandmother. Yeah, tactically. His former grandmother. Technically Lewis is the oldest formerly known as the grandmother. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:15:41 The lady formerly known as grandma. You can look at it this way one less present again She's just a simple now No, I'll be pissed with X's over the ice. Oh, it's a little whole No, you guys are right. I should look at a loved one's death as a positive You don't have to worry about it. You don't have to worry about it. You don't have to deal with her dying again Yeah, and you every year you know you look what am I gonna get it, what am I gonna get it? Now you just let it go. First of all, I would never buy her a gift.
Starting point is 01:16:07 Too much. Ha ha ha. My rose. She's a broken heart. The highlight of my year, I'm gonna say this is gonna sound made up. Yeah. My rose.
Starting point is 01:16:19 This guy right here is special. HBO special. Oh. Went there. We all went, I mean it. We were all there. Bobby wasn't there. I couldn't. We went there. It's all right. It's fine. I was there. Oh, New Thorne. New Thorne. Yeah, Bobby saying he couldn't come to the special and Soda's fucking soul escaping on camera Like this. It's okay. It's okay. Where was that? That was That was on the watch. Bobby, why couldn't you go? I was like, oh, I can't be there. Why can't we start as like this? You're on the road.
Starting point is 01:16:49 It's fine. I was it. I was it. I was fine. I don't need you there. You're doing cool. Yeah. I was I had a guy to creeps a kids show. I don't want to do anymore. I couldn't cancel it. It wasn't even like mine. Oh, no, no, no, I'm only kidding, but that was my rose, that was awesome. That was great. That was awesome. I was.
Starting point is 01:17:09 Nice showed up and it's crazy. Yeah, what else? HBO special. All right, what's the, it's like you're dismissing my rose. No, we got it, we kiss and ask, we got it. Kissing ask, why would I kiss this ask? I don't know, I don't know why.
Starting point is 01:17:22 Yeah, what am I gonna get from him? I don't know, he's probably, he's gonna blow up now He's probably no it's 2019 and HBO special does nothing. Yeah, he has nothing to offer me That's my best is less Twitter followers ahead before we had it. That's my entire Thoughts that he wants Twitter But how do they release Jessica Jessica's dance and Michelle's within date how We're gonna work
Starting point is 01:17:42 I'm not working. Yeah, but why would they do that? Why wouldn't they work with each other? They wanted to all go out for the holidays. Dan has literally nothing to offer me. No. My seed is I started a new podcast, which Dan made fun of. And then I'll be out soon in a few weeks. I think I love it. It's called Mindful Metal Jacket.
Starting point is 01:18:01 And I've also heard it about 10 of them. Wow. And I'm excited. I want to have everybody on the show except for Lewis and my and that guy and T-Poo and Gabi. I want Soda on the show. What about me? And you, obviously, yeah, and you.
Starting point is 01:18:14 And so it's a new podcast. It's gonna be really fun. I think you're fucking panties, if fucks my nose. My nose, I keep wanting a sneeze. Maybe you're, why would you do that? I just did that. Okay, put it back off. Hey, we're back. Maybe you're, why would you do that? I just did that. Okay, put it back off. Hey, we're back.
Starting point is 01:18:26 Maybe you're emotional for missing Dan's big day. Gabby's panties are so amazing. No touching. They're magic. Leave it. It works great. That's how a Zendolk's reindeer fly. This might be speaking. Oh, there you go, Prancer and Dancer.
Starting point is 01:18:43 She had a sweaty jawline. I saved the most musky one for Rudolph. Live from the North Pole. It's Santa Claus in the North Pole. My rose. Your Santa impression is a better done part of impression than your done part of it. Oh, my rose.
Starting point is 01:19:05 What, go ahead. Was making it, I hope it's my cordon. No, are you being, are you letting everyone do the Rosey Thorn? Yeah. No us. Just you four. Yeah. Well, no, everybody was, it was evolved. Oh, all right. It was, I'm just, because I was going to say, we're fucking, you know, let fucking these guys go after Dan and Joe and me. No, we don't need fucking depot's dreams.
Starting point is 01:19:28 I would say my rose is also my HBO spec. Yeah. You can't have that. Yeah, I can. That's egotistical. No, it's not me and that was the biggest thing in my brain. The man who was giving a humble button had it taken away. What?
Starting point is 01:19:38 Ah, it was, that was definitely. That's Wim Hof, dog. I know. That's what I was doing at dog. Oh, I didn't get it Now we got it. We've got to put him in a hard time. Now yeah. Oh god guys, it's happening put him in a cold shower. Oh no, he's not fucking he's not the cold shower That's what Bobby speak to me. Oh god It's my thorn Give my vibrator to dawn. It's my thorn. Let me smell those panties Give my pride in the dawn. It's my thorn.
Starting point is 01:20:02 Let me smell those panties. Oh, I go, Gabby put it over his face. It's like your box here, the smelling sauce. Yeah, he's up. Did you know it's like, it's like pulp fiction. Yeah. He goes, he goes, he goes, he goes, he goes, he goes, he goes, he goes, he goes, he goes,
Starting point is 01:20:17 he goes, he goes, he goes, he goes, he goes, there's an after world. I saw, I saw everyone there. I saw it. Everybody's looking like Gabby's dad. There he goes. That was curly blonde hair. Patrice asked me how stinky those pussy panties were. She was like, Everybody's looking like Gabby's dad. There he goes. That was curly blonde hair.
Starting point is 01:20:25 Patrice asked me how stinky those pussy panties were. She was like, yo Bobby, he's my old panties. He goes, let me see if you think you touched those panties. Damn. My HBO special is my Rose. It was incredible. Everyone that was there, thank you so much. I would be there.
Starting point is 01:20:42 I wouldn't miss it for the world. Nothing I would have loved before. You know what I'm saying? I felt so loving. Nothing he it for the world. Nothing. I would have This before you know there's not a thoughts. Oh, love it. Yeah, nothing he has to do It's on a Saturday. I have to be pooped. I have to make T-shirt I remember what you said to me right before I went on stage. Yeah, you do if Bobby was here He would be so proud of you. How proud of I was How proud of how proud of how was I? I was of you
Starting point is 01:21:02 Oh, look at this dude shirtless in the fucking window Yo, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I had my very first panic attack. Oh, fun. You should have called me dog. I'm an expert. You got listen to my podcast You first like a real first one where I had to like go somewhere and sit down and it took me a while and I was welcome to the club I don't know just him. I don't know where and it fucking sucked. I've had a couple this year Yeah, I talked to Alan and he's like of course Yeah, you have a lot of your brain It was a man. It was brutal. It was right over here in the West Village, and I walked down like a bunch of streets I didn't know, and it was fucking terrible.
Starting point is 01:21:48 Wow. I don't like panic attacks, and that was like, I remember telling Joe, I was like, I think I've had one, and Joe was like, you'll know when you have a real one. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, all right, and my seed is, I'm excited to be- I thought you're used to hate Louis.
Starting point is 01:22:00 Yeah, I really love him now. I love him. He just said, that's what Louis is. Bitters beginning, sweet aftertaste. No, he's bitter all the time. My seed is to become underwear brothers with Louis. So we can both put it on our heads and then throw it in jerk off.
Starting point is 01:22:17 We can just put one fun. Yeah, you're at it one time, I'm at it. I can throw it in. No, no, let's put our heads together. Yeah, that's my seed is to become underwear jerk brothers.. We grab you jerk off on the panties. Oh, no that ruins the Shed shoes and it goes over on to your panties and then your mouth and you can stop all the weird gay You sound like the voice in my head Weird gay man stop it Lewis. What's your rose?
Starting point is 01:22:42 like the voice in my head. Man, you're a weird gay man. Stop it. Lewis, what's your rose? My rose, um, wasn't Dan special. Damn it. I was trying to go for the fucking turkey. Don't go through what it wasn't. Yeah, it was not.
Starting point is 01:22:56 No, it could not be Dan special. Yeah. My rose this year. Um, I got to be honest with you. Rose this year. I got to be honest with you. Literally, I think the thing that is making me really, really happy right now is that I've organized my life in a big way. A higher-to-person assistant.
Starting point is 01:23:15 And I'm just firing on, what did you say? She hot. Yes, pretty hot. So, but I'm firing on all cylinders now. And it's because I have I have a I've Bad 80 day and I can't pay attention to things and I put things off like crazy So I'm just very excited to finally I feel like the balls moving down the court good. That sounds more like a seed I mean, I don't want to be a jerk here. I'm just saying this is the first time we've all just been like wow good for you Lewis
Starting point is 01:23:42 And you ruined it. No, I was happy when you had your child December 28th 2012. 29th. The night before was really when it's special though. Yeah it is true. When he's crowning you know or she's fine. So I find that that's my scene. So the Rose is like just a bright moment of the year that I loved. Yeah the highlight of the year dog.
Starting point is 01:24:01 I mean my special coming out. Yeah Louis J. Gomez presents Louis J. Gomez. You know it's special coming out. Yeah. Luce Jay Gomez presents Luce Jay Gomez. I mean, that was special for you. Did it? It was I'm widely regarded the dark horse special of the year. Did it just come out? Came out in April.
Starting point is 01:24:12 When? Buck. How did I? That's what everybody said. Well, what about Skankfest? That was a rose and a half. What a rose. That was how?
Starting point is 01:24:20 Louis showing up for Skankfest. Skankfest. That's expanding to Skankfest out doing an heo's in this year. I mean, yeah, I gotta be honest, things are fucking going as good as they've ever gone. You got a garden of roses. You like that, you like those tic-tacs, huh? Well, I'm in a great little gift.
Starting point is 01:24:36 No sugar, no calories. And my thorn, my thorn is Gabby spraying her underwear with the lice all. I get that. That affected me too. It bothered me because it's like, you know what? I was trying to go for. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:24:50 I wanted to smell your mustard pussy. Why'd you cut? Why'd you cut the product? I showed you an ad to it. You stepped on it. Just go outside and get some mustard off one of those hot dog trucks and put it back on. I say, Gabby, let's put the paintings back on. Do a lap.
Starting point is 01:25:04 Yeah. Yeah. I have a weight table for an hour downstairs. Oh, man. Yeah. Good double. So great. I will tell you right now, like legitimately, I'm going to masturbate with her panties in my mouth. Today, yes. And our Instagram. Can you give us? Can you give us a lot of me to sell them to people? You know, to be honest, that's creepy as fuck. No, that's right. Some money. That's right. Some money for a kid with no leg no lose
Starting point is 01:25:25 lewis keeping that is the true spirit of christmas if we raise a thousand dollars we give it to children's hospital that way why no way if someone pays a thousand dollars there a fucking idiot i'm i'll just give her panties directly to the children's hospital let them pass them around and the kill and heels cancer lewis trevour was stage four and heels cancer Lewis Trevor was stage four And he's fought back after smelling Lewis
Starting point is 01:25:48 Michael's leukemia is gone What if we get someone with cancer who also has a smelly pussy just to tie it all in like a stinky-pussed Cancer patient, okay, I think that's kind of I'm just saying it seems like something to tie it in together like a medicine today like are you sick? Yes, how does your cut smell bad? Here's a thousand bucks? I'm for a minute. Yeah, but no, I think things are just been overall good And I'm happy to be friends with everyone here, and you know, I wish that's all the time we have wish Nate would return my phone Close does he does it? What'd you do? I don't know do you want me to call him?
Starting point is 01:26:23 I remember let's call him right now. The first time I went on the road with him, um, yeah. I was like, dude, wouldn't be hilarious if we, uh, if we stole the 666 page of every Bible for every hotel, we went and they made a book of page 666 of the Bible. It's pretty dope. That's funny. Fucking fire ass idea, right? Yeah. Neated nothing. So he's like, man, that is a sacred book.
Starting point is 01:26:42 Come on, buddy. Come on, man. That ain't come on. Bloody.'s the God that's God's phone book God wrote that was you're sitting hotels with Bibles in them. Yes, where do you stay? What kind of most most hotels love Bibles I don't know James. I was with Bibles You know you fucking live a very dark life It's the book of see that that's my new thorn you saying that's getting to the heart me Bobby just stays poor Bobby stays like old coffee like vampire So leave me Robo
Starting point is 01:27:10 Oh They're gonna do it It's bodyguards No god I'm gonna burn my skin What Joe has just said to the satellites. Well you guys do this stuff. I can't do the voices. I know he can't. You know the mouthful. Check out because that midnight.
Starting point is 01:27:31 Check in is that midnight? Oh, welcome to the hotel California. You saved him on that one. Check in midnight. Then midnight again. I'm trying to get a sniff of those pants and loneses. You keep on fucking carrying me through this pocket as you Friends that help each other jerk off to the same panties All right
Starting point is 01:27:58 There are brown stains I love you face I'm not saying it's a bad thing. It's literally dried period blood. It's so much fun. It's like 100% It's like Lewis finding out about extra things on a car. He goes oh my god power steering Dude the seats get hot. Oh my god. There's a little bit of poop in the butt part That was just upper fucking flasks great You could have a taste you can't You're as you're fucking Bet you're pretty hardy sure out of whack
Starting point is 01:28:42 You're not understanding your ass, you're fucking bachelor degrees, your priorities are out of whack. Yeah, I already have the projector. It's true. Oh my God. Now you can project Lewis's headshot to the authorities when they come to talk to you. It's all on camera. She willingly gave me those panties.
Starting point is 01:28:57 Yeah, it was a trade. She made a decision. That's capitalism. Yeah, I lied about the $400, but it won't have been around 350. Yeah, so good for you. You made a good deal She made a really good deal very much worth it great deal for everyone involved. I'm very happy. I'm happy too I'm happy. I'm happy. I feel like who's not happy? Deep I love just making eye contact with Gabby on the show now and every time I do it
Starting point is 01:29:17 She just looks away like scared. It's fucking great. Yeah, it's just like gross. I do the same thing Nobody looks at you in the eye. Is this your thorn? What today? Yeah. Well, I'm kind of happy about the projector if I'm going to be honest. Hey, this is a rose.
Starting point is 01:29:32 Here's the thing. Long after you've forgotten the panties, you'll be watching movies on this. I was going to watch it. I was a special on that. I hope it short circuits the first time you turn around. I'm just immediately broken. So smoke comes out of it.
Starting point is 01:29:43 She tries to call somebody said said, don't get. Comic says you're going, why would we give gifts to the bonfire? And you're like, you're a female comic? Well, we have you. Would you like to do an hour? How about the first two hours special? No.
Starting point is 01:29:54 But I wouldn't even have a 10. And that's okay. Yeah, what are you, your white? Oh, yeah, that's fine. Yeah. All right, who's next? Come on, I got to go to therapy for God's sake. I think I am, right?
Starting point is 01:30:03 Yeah, like no one cares. My last, I was going to ask Gabby what I. I think I am, right? Yeah, like no one cares about me. My last, I was gonna ask Gabby what her, go ahead, do it. What's your rose? But just be quick, because you're a woman. Oh cool, cool, cool. I just smell the rose. You only get a third of the time.
Starting point is 01:30:13 How are you? I knew, stand at the, my new show at the stand called Our Time of the Week. Seed. It's my rose. She's in a plug. What? He did a plug of his special.
Starting point is 01:30:23 My seat is using his projector. Plugging an HBO specialist. It's kind of it's kind of already plugged by being HBO. You have a show at the stand. You appear in his HBO's desial to your show at the stand. That's actually degrading his special. That's the same. I'm sorry. More people. More people will watch our show at the stand. It's actually sold out. It's pretty big. What's your seat? My seat is It's in his pocket My seat is the movie that Bobby is in that I made this year I sent you the finished one, but what's gonna do festivals? What is it go one of the festivals? I mean, I don't know yet. Actually really good. She did a great job. Thank you. You directed. I wrote it
Starting point is 01:31:12 Bobby, yeah, Max was kept in underpants. Yeah, you look just like I know that You don't think I did the outfit already have Have you not formed? Are you nuts or quiz? I did. That's awesome. Yes, of course I am. You just walk around the house. Ta-da!
Starting point is 01:31:29 No, that's trotla. Oh, trotla, la. You're captain, absolutely. Now. Ha ha ha. We're like senior underpants. Ha ha ha. Yeah, why don't you pull up a picture,
Starting point is 01:31:40 and captain underpants while we're here, producers. You fucking. I'm sorry, dude. I'm trying. I mean, we said it up. But they listen to the show. They don't, they're not paying attention to the show. There's got a keyboard in front of them.
Starting point is 01:31:50 What am I supposed to do? It's crazy. I'm not much. I have a little visual laugh. Look at that. Wow. You are captain underpants. He literally is captain underpants.
Starting point is 01:31:58 That's so true. Absolutely. Then I fucking spent $125 on four figurines. Because they don't make toys. So they had to go like eBay that a special limited release. Yeah. Did I fucking spend $125 on four figurines? Because they don't make toys. So I had to go like eBay that a special limited release. You know, I'll give you for Max. The fucking, I have an extra ring.
Starting point is 01:32:12 A fisty although. Yeah, what a fisty son. You have Max, you're gonna love this bud. Even when you're in school, I can turn it on. He goes A, B, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z. What is it? The ring that they use to hypnotize them, the hit no ring. Oh, really? So each figurine came with a hit no ring.
Starting point is 01:32:35 So I have five hit no rings. James doesn't need five. So I'll be a hit no ring just to give them a lot of love. Oh, you're the best. Oh, it's great. Yeah. What would you get your kid for Christmas?
Starting point is 01:32:42 Well, I got him those and then I got him a bunch of books. I got him Jiu-Jitsu mats for the apartment. That's great. Um, I got him for his keyboard to stand in a stool. You know, we got maxed through. We got him the virtual reality for the Nintendo Switch. Oh, fucking great. Oh, they have VR for that now.
Starting point is 01:32:57 Yeah, it's a VR and it's a gun. And yeah, it's like that Nintendo Switch topics. Uh, all right. And I got a, I got a Martin Jr. guitar. Oh, nice. No Martin guitars. I got a Martin senior guitar. So that's weird. Did you really get your good to junior?
Starting point is 01:33:14 It fits him. That's a small guitar for a kid. Well, guess what? I got him a record deal. What? He does another play. Three of my son, a Tommy Lee's drum set. Whoa. The original.
Starting point is 01:33:25 That's funny, because I got Eddie Van Halen's first guitar. Whoa. These kids have no point of record for me. I got the elephant man's bones. Really? Yeah, funny, because I got from Michael Jackson's bones. I actually, I have Michael Jackson's bones. Oh, no.
Starting point is 01:33:41 Guys, I sucked McCulley Cogans. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right, my rose, my thorn, I think would have to be mark disease. No, not that. That wouldn't be not yet. I guess the constant smell of burning hair. My, my point again smells like Gabby's panties
Starting point is 01:34:07 Gabby's panties smells like a stroke. Yeah. I My phone would have to be my dad passing my step-dad Larry that was that was fucking out of the blue 62 years old. That's not that's an age to mourn Joe. Oh, thank you Lewis. Yeah, thank you That's an age to mourn Joe. Oh, thank you Lewis. Yeah, thank you. Yeah, the old listen to him. Drill why you went out the way that I want to do pointing in the parking lot against a bigger mind But that'll teach you how to run at each Don't go around working your big mouth about me
Starting point is 01:34:47 The f**king gypsy with a little mouth I mean the gypsy come with the sky Most people talk a little faster. I talk slow because my mouth is small Why couldn't you even enjoy the creative I need soup They call me soupy. I sucked it through. What's your what's your rose? My rose. My Everyone knows you go to there's a knockout Someone's not standing I can't spit out More water cut me mix Cut me the sides of my mouth please
Starting point is 01:35:37 The sturdy makers point I'm gonna go to heaven I gotta go to the party. Take away his legs. My seed, the seed is what? What you look forward to. But I look forward to. I am actually looking forward to this year. I am actually made a plan.
Starting point is 01:35:57 There's a lot of things that happen this year. We're doing our first Father's Day trip. Yeah, I'm looking this year, but the thing that happened, that's the best I've ever seen. We're not doing it. I think this year, because I really focus in and on losing weight this year.
Starting point is 01:36:13 Good. The only thing I'm gonna do, I'm booked up the Cruiser Kids thing. Is gang best? booked up. Yeah, I got a lot of gigs, so I'm just gonna do these shows have fun And I'm gonna and get into shape. What's gonna be your that's a thing because I have cleaned house right now
Starting point is 01:36:32 I have I have a whole nothing in front of me except shows that what what's gonna be your regiment for losing weight? All right now I'm gonna do this whole 30 for the next 30 days I am gonna and I'm gonna try to do what quickly. What's the whole 30? Whole 30 is no sugar, no grains, but I mean, and there's a bunch of things you can, you know, vegetables, meats, blah, blah, blah, but there's literally nothing, no sugar at all, and no grains, but you can have potatoes and stuff like that with olive oil and stuff like that.
Starting point is 01:36:59 So it's a little better for me. But I'm gonna do that, I'm gonna focus to that for the next 30, I'm gonna try to stick to it as much as I can. Actually, I have around 60 fans from Instagram that are doing it with me. Good. So I'm gonna do it with that. I'm just gonna focus on my body this year because I've been trying to do so many things podcasting and trying to make it and do all this shit and blah blah. And I'm I'm I'm I can't this is gone. I can't do it. I can't, I used to be able to use 30 pounds in a month
Starting point is 01:37:27 when I was in my late 30s. I could just work out for a month and lose to, I can't do it. I'm 49, I'm older. Things don't work the way they used to work. I'm gonna just take the time to change my whole eating habits. For the next couple of months, to maybe three months, I'm gonna just do that.
Starting point is 01:37:42 I'm gonna get back into working out a little bit, not crazy, what I can do, because I always go too far, get hurt, and, I'm gonna just do that. I'm gonna get back into working out a little bit, not crazy, what I can do, because I always go too far, get hurt, and then I'm out, and I'm fucked, I'm not doing that. So that's what, that is going to be my seed, correct? Yes, that's good. What I'm looking forward to is getting back to being healthy. Great.
Starting point is 01:37:57 And my rose, I think would have to be creeps for kids this year. Great. Because, you know, that was around two years ago, I did that show at the village underground. You know, you've been on it. Just, in my head to see something come to fruition, even when people weren't into it, weren't into it.
Starting point is 01:38:18 People didn't want to do it. People didn't, people were like, yeah, I don't, but whatever. I had to push that shit up the hill and it stopped a couple times with people like, yeah, no. I was like, I have fuck and I kept it going and, you know, Maddie Frost, my agent got us that theater and then Bennington is fucking, I really, I can't tell you how much I appreciate that guy in my life. I've learned so much touring with him.
Starting point is 01:38:45 Yeah. I've learned so much about it. It's a legend. And this tour and Voss and Florentine, everybody involved and of course Deb, who's the tour manager, it was just fucking great to do because for the first time I ever did a tour. Everybody got paid the same. Everybody went up where they wanted to go up.
Starting point is 01:39:03 Sure. We figured all that out beforehand. Let's just go have fun, because this shit, I've done these tours before. And there's always an ego, there's always a fucked up thing, and I've had it, I've been a victim of it, and I was like, I'm sick of doing that. So we had a fucking blast. We did, was it one theater, turned into 14, 16, 18,
Starting point is 01:39:20 we're going into 2020 all the way to December next year, and it's one of the funniest shows I've ever been a part of and with a bunch of people and I can't believe it came to you know Dude is your rose a plug and we did it's not a fucking rose a plug right but we actually got we got to the festival Just for laughs. Yeah said no three times and it was like fuck because that was one of my dreams to go to just for laughs with creams of kids Now we're going to Moon towel with it. Yeah, so I can't what you're going to but not with creams of kids We're doing we're not doing it there. Yeah, you are you're all all on skank fest and you're all doing a creeps of kids show We're not doing a cruise of kids show specifically are doing a cruise of kids. No, I mean you can't afford it
Starting point is 01:40:04 But listen the thing is Sell those panties and buy the they can't afford the I mean what we get paid But MoonTawa can and just for laughs has the money. There's no way more established. There's no way They're established this year first year, but listen Yeah, so I'm very excited about that That that makes me happy that we, that actually became what I wanted to become and we had suck, dude, I can't tell you how much fun.
Starting point is 01:40:29 Even that one when Shane jumped on and we do the panel at the end, it was a lot of fun. So I'm hoping to do more of them and have people just come in and do them, you know. So that was great. That was my, my thing. That was really long. That was a lot.
Starting point is 01:40:43 I don't want to do it. I was waiting for you guys to throw shit in. Lewis was the only one. I was trying, but it was a hard felt man. I'm just really happy to see you. I'm taking care of yourself. God bless. All right, thanks.
Starting point is 01:40:51 Can I get it? You're underwear for 400 bucks? 400 bucks. I'll give it to you right now. It's what I got. I'll give it to you right now and I pretty sure this jizz in him. Yes. You want to do it?
Starting point is 01:41:00 He's ready to jump up the window and fly out of here with him. I got, I'm going to immediately. How's your feeling? Pull out that ring. of here with him. I'm like, to a meeting. How's your feeling? Pull out that ring. Come on, come on. Come on, come on. It's all a good night. Ha ha ha.
Starting point is 01:41:11 Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. I just wanna say thank you guys for the last year. Shut up. Shut up, Mike. I'm queer. Because he saved my dog's life. Oh.
Starting point is 01:41:19 Oh. Oh. We did it. We lived. I personally saved your life. You didn't do it. I'll saved you The idea you did the idea, but you didn't give the money until we fucking guilted you into it wrong He gave it After everybody no, he did more than everybody
Starting point is 01:41:33 No more than everybody wait a minute. What are you talking about? Where's the lady? What is the problem? Everybody else how much did he give? It was like 20 more than the rest of the people I gave fucking how much you I gave 250 yeah, he gave You got it? You got it? I gave 250. Yeah. And he gave like 270.
Starting point is 01:41:48 He just made a point of it. Fuck it, I mean, it was funny. You know what I said? This was real ass move. Hell yeah, don't you? Pretty bad ass. And I wanted that dog to die. I just had to beat you guys.
Starting point is 01:41:56 Yeah. No, I remember that when we were all really respectful of your sick dog, but not my dead human grandmother. Well, let's do a, well, let's do a, go fund me for her. Yeah, maybe. What do you want to get? I can't skip. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:42:07 My family doesn't make a lot of money. Yeah, well, yeah, we're in trouble. Okay, we're falling apart. Can I say something? So, you know, we have a great makeup box we could put her in. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I want to say thank you guys for that. For Gabby's paintings. She comes back to life. Oh! Oh, come on.
Starting point is 01:42:30 Oh, come on. Oh, my missalor! Oh, my boy. Tell them! Tell them the kid of Kenny's old fun. I love that. Who wants to do the character so bad, but he knows you're so good. I can't.
Starting point is 01:42:41 It's also just Mrs. Delphire. Oh, the smaller one. Mr. good. Oh, the smaller one. What's that though? The smaller one. We're set, we're set home could pick up his blind. What's your, what else, Mike? Oh, so say thank you guys for that. Luckily this year, like I can take care of it myself.
Starting point is 01:42:54 So we've got a lot of issues. So thanks to Bobby. Are you making us feel bad? She's got a more issues. No, it's just, he's all the tumor, but he's doing good. He's not doing good. What is he doing?
Starting point is 01:43:04 What would you do that for? Because he's doing great. Like he's really happy. But he has a tumor, but he's doing good. He's not doing good with the tumor. What is he doing? What would you do that for? Because he's doing great. Like he's really happy. But he has a tumor. But if he dies, our money was wasted. Yeah. He would have been dead if it wasn't for you. We bought another year of this dog's life.
Starting point is 01:43:15 Well, is he going to die this year? To kill me. I mean, not for this thing. He's doing good. Please. What? He's going to die. He's going to say. What? He's going to say.
Starting point is 01:43:26 He's going to say. Hey, buddy. We look at the dog and still got all the tumors. He's just got new shitness. He's got new Jordan's on. He paid rent for the year. He goes, yeah, no, no, it's pretty bad. It's not.
Starting point is 01:43:35 The Jasper's doing great. So thank you guys. You're welcome. I was going to say, but there's other people who need help. So if you have another go fund me to go into a lasano, Chris Cotton, those are people who... Iszolo's Auto's Got it. One more of the Angelo's Got it.
Starting point is 01:43:48 Yeah, and it was just cancer. That's how I'm a cancer. Yeah. Make sure you put that up. Angelo is a great comic, a friend of ours. We'll put the links up. You can donate to him. He needs help.
Starting point is 01:43:58 And of course, Chris Cotton just passed away suddenly from asthma. And he was very young and actually starting to pop getting some stuff in his career, unlike Joe. And things were looking up. We always used Joe that died. No, we don't want him to die. Also Joe breathes like he has asthma.
Starting point is 01:44:15 You know how he used to describe it? Like, was breathing through a little straw? Joe, tiny mouth. Come on, everyone. We got it. Yeah, it's just a little too mean. We're going to put his leg up too for his family. Raising his wife got it. Yeah, it's just a little too mean. Yeah. We're gonna put his leg up too for his family Raising his wife pregnant. Yeah, cotton's cotton had a baby on the way. Oh my fucking terrible man
Starting point is 01:44:32 That's one of the things read all this shit happened And I was like I'm done. I was in I was in a rubah, and I felt I this I moved Some way and I was like this. I can't this, I felt like I was somebody else's body. I was like, I'm done. I'm Santa Claus is done. Zach, what do you got? go. It's up to Louis. Yeah, what do you got? What is deep? Okay, to give us think you're saying? Yeah, you think you should? No.
Starting point is 01:45:12 What about Zach? I was saying I wanted to. I was just asking you to end on Zach. No, no, no, they can't get things. They're not ready. Um, so plug skankfest.net is my website guys. Go to skankfest.net. Uh, tickets are on sale right now. We have the fucking craziest lineup in comedy. Period. Okay. Bobby Kelly is going to be there. Dan Soto is going to be there. Big J. Obviously the league of skanks. Swore has this fucking coming out like a motherfucker Jim Norton, uh, Florentine, the cream. Not any of the advertising. Yeah, you are. No, I'm not. You're like you're the beginning of it. No, I know you are. You're in the trailer. There's one that I'm not. You're in the trailer. You're in the trailer. You're
Starting point is 01:45:42 in the trailer. I should, I mean, it wouldn't exist if it wasn't for me. What are you complaining about? You're in everything, advertised. You're literally one of the marquee names. I just wanted to say, that's all. I didn't know that. I didn't even look at the trailer. I just want to make sure that you do the truck. We play the trailer. Yeah. If it's really five minutes, you're gonna love it. You're gonna love it. I'll play the show at the end. So, um, yeah, I mean, Tom Green's coming, which is going to be fucking awesome. Oh, uh, Doug Benson, Doug loves movies. Got him comedy jams three different nights. Metzger, Derosa, Salva Conner for the
Starting point is 01:46:10 Inpractical Joker. Shout out to the movie. They're gonna have a movie. I know. How great is that? Tim Dillon, Zach Miko, Naked Rose Battle. It's gonna be insane, dude. What's time is the next podcast?
Starting point is 01:46:20 Four. Okay. Who's on that one? Yeah. Dylan, Rich Boss. Tim Dillon's on town one? Yeah. Dylan, a rich boss. Tim Dillen's a town. Yeah. Yeah. What are we doing? Skank's money. Play the trailer. It's on YouTube. Just look up SkankFest trailer. Bob, you're gonna like it. I'm excited. Yeah. Come to Houston for the first time. March 27th
Starting point is 01:46:35 or 29th. All access and single-day passes are available now. So get them now. You get to, you're never gonna see a hundred of the greatest comedies in the world in one fucking place, one weekend, very concentrated. These other festivals are great, but it's not like that. It's not like you go to one show and then once you're over here, everyone's partying in one spot. There's four stages happening. All right, Ken. Bob, you watching?
Starting point is 01:46:56 Yeah. You're not watching. Good morning, good morning. You're listening to KPPT T Texas number one conservative top radio station We've got a caller Karen is on the phone and she's a little concerned tell us what's on your mind Karen? Yes, I'm a long-time listener first time caller and I just wanted to share with my community that kind of a little bit My son has become a fan of these projects
Starting point is 01:47:26 and quote unquote comedians from up in New York. And apparently, they're bringing down a big group of these degenerates, found house Cornell for some of their cold games best. Is he a son? I've watched him on the leaves the day because I have these people's可不可不 Yeah, Skankfest.net. That's great, that's a fucking... Look how excited you are buddy. That's a fucking great. Look how excited you are, buddy.
Starting point is 01:48:45 I'm a big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big. And I think it's a sound fast. We sell it every year. Don't wait. People wait till the last minute and then they get bummed out that it should be in Texas. What? This festival should be in Texas.
Starting point is 01:48:56 Well, we're, can we go hog hunting while we're there, please? We'll go set up. Can we do a, uh, uh, a Skankfest hog hunt night? Maybe, uh, I, I, I don't know if I could kill a hog, Bob. I'll do it. I'm just wrestling you. That's why I can have some of my diet. Stop it.
Starting point is 01:49:10 Do you see me? I'm just eating its neck. Hey, you know what you should do is get a cowboy hat company to do Skankfest fucking cowboy hats. We're doing, I already got all my staff is wearing the American flag cowboy hat. I don't care about that. I'm talking about us. Yeah. Oh yeah. You got to go.
Starting point is 01:49:25 All right, bye Joe. Joe, what do you got, Joe? Merry Christmas, Joe. Oh, I got Tuesdays with stories. Every Tuesday and then comedy on state, January 16th, past club ever. And Madison and then Skankfest and Moon Tower and, I don't know.
Starting point is 01:49:41 What's your website? ComedianJillist.com. One of the funniest, thanks so much. Merry Christmas, love you, buddy. You guys, and happy New Year. I want to say. Happy. What's your website? Comedian Jolis. One of the funniest. Thanks so much. Merry Christmas. Love you, buddy. You guys, and happy New Year. I want to be here. Happy New Year, job. Sorry. How many on state is the best club? Joe, don't forget your come water.
Starting point is 01:49:53 No. No. Come. You got your come. Damn, what do you got? Dance under.com back on the road in January, 2020, Boston, Austin, San Francisco. Special HBO. Can you believe it? Can you fucking believe it anywhere you can stream son of a Gary out now. You can go stream it I'm I can't tell Pratt. Thanks man. I'm happy. I was so I was telling Don about it. I was like I'm so and it looked fucking great Thanks dude. It was I like the they like the downplayed yeah ground It was just like a fucking dude at a fucking room. That's exactly what I wanted.
Starting point is 01:50:25 Hot crowd, it was great. Yeah, I just, I wanted it simplified and. Are the best special of the year of anyone. Woo! I mean, I'm special. A lot of people. A lot of people. You're special.
Starting point is 01:50:36 I took a lot of chances. By the, you're special. By the way, I got to see something cool this year. It's getting fast. I watched Louis CK compliment Louis on his special. Yeah. He pulled him aside. He goes, I watch a special, very funny. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:50:46 I was standing right there for that. It was pretty cool to watch. Yeah. That was pretty awesome. It's all that hard work paid off. Yeah, it's pretty great. Yes, you know, Louis Shagun, Mr.
Starting point is 01:50:55 Louis Shagun, Mr. Louis Shagun, Mr. Louis Shagun, Mr. Louis Shagun. I love the footage of all that of the Skankfest thing. You had to go, you had to get like a 1985 footage, TV footage of Voss. Oh yeah.
Starting point is 01:51:06 It was like grainy. It was from fucking two drink minimum on AMA. Yeah, you had a party tail. It was from MTV's Half Hour Comedy Hour. It was like everybody had up to date, oh my god footage and then this Voss is like grainy footage from a VHS tape. Um, Caroline's comedy hour.
Starting point is 01:51:23 Yeah, make sure you check it out, man. I can't tell you how proud I am, you do it. Love you, buddy. So awesome. So awesome. And fucking you. Good for you, I'm proud of all of you. I really, that would probably be my, my, my rose would probably be you three fucks.
Starting point is 01:51:36 How many of you guys are doing? I mean, some better than others. I'm joking. You know, you can talk about it. Dude, man, I think that grandma stuff always started burning and met you. Yeah. I was in bananas this weekend and the first time I ever performed there was opening for you and did he, she loves you. I don't know what you can talk about it, but... Dude man, I think that grandma stuff really started burning them at the end. Yeah. I was in bananas this weekend, and the first time
Starting point is 01:51:47 I ever performed there was opening for you, and Didi's, she loves you. I mean, she fucks you. Yeah. Yeah, bananas, great club. It seems like it's gonna suck, because it's a... Always in a hotel,
Starting point is 01:51:57 and that's typically the setup for like a shit show. Yeah. But it's just great. They love comedy. The wall, it's level-lookin' at the wall of like just everybody that's like every fucking great comic has come through bananas. The first time I did that club, but it was so far away, even though it's not.
Starting point is 01:52:09 From the city I stayed at the hotel. I bought a paintball gun. Really? Yeah, like the next day I was like, I need something. I went in and bought a, I went in front of paintball, but I just bought this rifle.
Starting point is 01:52:19 That's great. I was in the hotel with this rifle like a psychopath. I used it one time in LA. And it's at somebody's house, and I never see it again. It was like 800 bucks for all of that. Yeah, I just lost my mind. I almost spent what I was making that weekend.
Starting point is 01:52:31 Yeah, just to get a... Just to fill the hole in my stomach. But yeah, she's fucking great, that club's great. They, I mean, obviously, you know, she knew me from coming in with you. And to be able to come back and headline these clubs that I open for you at, it's like, you know, it's great dude.
Starting point is 01:52:46 I mean, and I appreciate it. And I always say, literally, I always say that you're the fatest friend of mine. I say that to everybody. That's fucking nicer, man. That's awesome. I mean, it's not true. I always, you voted for some fat motherfuckers.
Starting point is 01:53:00 Yeah, no, no, I tell people that you're literally responsible for basically everything I have. I love you, buddy. I love you, buddy that first? Yeah, no, no, I tell people that you're literally responsible for basically everything I have. I love you, buddy. I love you, buddy. So proud of you. I'm gonna give you a guy who's been with us. I'm done with them. I don't want them.
Starting point is 01:53:11 I'd like to just use them for a little bit. Would you? Just to teach master things. Yeah. Yeah. Smell these. I don't like it. Learn to make it.
Starting point is 01:53:20 Are you gonna do your homework? Are you gonna do your chores? I'm gonna do your chores. I'm gonna put them in James's mouth every time he says a dirty word. Oh man, then he's gonna be dropping fucking money on him. Hookers with his older. What a bad fucking fangit. Oh, you piece of shit. New Year's Eve, the degenerates Netflix, comes out. New Year's Eve, Did you get it? The generous on it. Yes. But look, Kelly, I really love the fucking ad advertisement.
Starting point is 01:53:49 Dude, can I tell you something? I came back from Edinburgh. I did the French festival. Yeah. And my first weekend back in the States was Vegas, following you at the seller in Vegas. Yeah. And it was very uncomfortable.
Starting point is 01:54:02 Hi. That set is fucking airtight. Oh, yeah. that was good. It's such a good set. That was a fun night, dude. It's such a good set. Everybody murdered. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:54:10 Darnel Rowlands. Great. Miss Pat. Awesome. Adrian Apollucci. Right, Nikki Laser. What the, Jim Norton. Great.
Starting point is 01:54:21 One of the alleged me. The best. Am I missing anybody? No, I nailed it huh? That's it all six of us it's it's happening New Year's Eve Where I'll be in Philly if you guys are in Philly come out the day before New Year's Eve and New Year's Eve I'll be there with a bunch of the comics Can I plug New Year's Eve Lee just gang's live at the comedy store?
Starting point is 01:54:40 Oh, yeah, let's be a bit boy. That's fun. See that sounds like a fun New Year's But anyway, I'm gonna be I'm gonna be at the Philly punchline New yeah. Let's be a bit boy. That's fun. See, that sounds like a fun new year's. But anyway, I'm going to be at the Philly Punch line, New Year's Eve. Yep. Go ahead, buddy. Yeah, go pee. Yeah, go pee. Go jerk off to those panties. Leave the panties on the table.
Starting point is 01:54:56 Anyways, what's up? Creeps with Kids Returns January 18th to Detroit Michigan at the Pro Theater. And Grammar's Theater, March 14th, New York, tickets are almost out. Creeps of kids are almost done in Grammys, theater Make sure you buy the tickets get on it right the fuck now me Ron Bennington rich Voss Jim Florentine and special guests Grammys theater make sure you get the tickets and And go to robocanelive.com. My Patreon fans, God bless you all, ask Bobby, we'll be back this week. With the Tim Dill episode.
Starting point is 01:55:31 Yeah, so make sure you email the, put the Ask questions up there and ask the questions to what? Ask Bobby at gmail.com. Boba Bing. Patreon members, just put it on the Patreon. Patreon members, you're the best Merry Christmas. Thanks for being a part of that. And Deepo, what do you got? It was great to see everybody. Merry Christmas.
Starting point is 01:55:47 Merry Christmas, buddy. And you're gonna see a deep whoo. What? Yeah, go ahead. I got a podcast you guys can check out. What's it called? You might you might like it actually. I won't. Well, no, because my co-host tortures me every week. Okay. So you might like that. Okay. It's called hack thought podcast. Okay. About thoughts you don't think to think about. Been going three years strong. It's great. Check it out. Thanks. Sounds hacky. I, uh, what do you got, Chris? At thonthatcini.com. Um, yeah, that's pretty much it. All right. Design should I get awesome, man. He's the best. Uh, you like, isn't that a good gift? Love them. You're going to put those in the kitchen. You guys before you go out,
Starting point is 01:56:19 grab a couple. So cute. What do you got? Isn't my podcast called unabashed podcast? I've a new show at the stand. Next one is January 7th, downstairs 7pm I'm of the week on Instagram sold out last time I've shown Brooklyn College I get with it first Wednesday of every month and a show at the Barry Electric called happy baby All on Instagram follow me at Gabby is Brian this year We got a whole new studio. We got a whole new bunch of podcasts coming in. Riotcast is now a laugh button. And the Interprone Gorilla, we have joined firsts,
Starting point is 01:56:52 we are slowly but surely making this into a epic podcast network. And the new people we're bringing on was so proud of, I'm so excited to bring on the new shows. And so follow the podcast at YKWD, YKWD dude. Yep. At and Rakeli and Robert Kelly live on Instagram. We call him mushy. Yep. And going on, uh, follow me at Mike Fiswaras of a new podcast coming out where
Starting point is 01:57:19 interview comics whose parents died during Calbrus. Uh, it's called I miss my mom. So, oh my God. Fuck. How many comics is that? Swear as going dark. Jesus Christ. All right. Anyways, I feel like shit now.
Starting point is 01:57:33 Yeah. Dog. Merry Christmas, everyone. Yeah, Merry Christmas. Happy New Year. Oh, I'm gonna go call my dad. Zach, what do you got? Zach, the new guy. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:57:44 Zach, plug your fucking album, dude. Oh yeah, Z the dropout underscore you can find me everywhere. He's fucking amazing. Genuinely great. I really, I know one day I'm just gonna see him on fucking MTV and some show. Do you play music anymore? What? Can you not step on the fucking thing? Well, I don't know. Maybe you go to YouTube or serious XS. I was gonna say YouTube after. The bonfire coming since we were ready to do it. I gotta go, goodbye.
Starting point is 01:58:12 You guys are the best fans of the world. You know what, dude? See you next year. Later. You've been listening to the YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. Shitty jobs. Shitty, shitty jobs. you

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