Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Yannis Pappas, Paul Virzi | Hot Safe Room
Episode Date: November 13, 2022This week Yannis Pappas and Paul Virzi join Robert Kelly and get into serial killer musicals, voting in New York and the importance of the invite! As a listener of this podcast, you’ll get $100 off... of your first month with Talkspace. To match with a licensed therapist today, go to Talkspace.com. Make sure to use the code YKWD to get $100 off of your first month and show your support for the show. Robert Kelly "Kill Box" AVAILABLE NOW at LouisCK.com Patreon.com/RobertKelly to watch Unedited and Ad Free PLUS Watch Episodes LIVE and GET Bonus Episodes https://twitter.com/robertkelly https://twitter.com/YKWDpodcast http://instagram.com/ykwdudepodcast https://www.facebook.com/YkwdPodcast/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Activa es único porque a diferencia de otros, activa ha demostrado que sus millones de
probióticos naturales llegan vivos a la microviota.
Y además ayuda a tu salud digestiva.
Activa.
3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno.
Esta es la 3 por uno señal, que significa que ya puedes aprovecharte el 3 por uno en
mediana a San homicidios solo pidiendo al line.
¿Saparao?
tres por uno, tres por uno, oh no no no.
¡Dominos!
Pizza.
¿Suéñas con un futuro más allá de los estudios de grado?
Gracias a las becas de post-grazo en el extranjero, de la Fundación La Caixa.
Puedes estudiar en las mejores universidades y centros de investigación del mundo. Tu talento te mueve. Solicitate We got Paul Versey. My boys are back and we have a great episode. It's crazy. It gets weird. It gets funky.
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show and you support my hooker addiction. Yeah, baby, we're starting the podcast right
now. We're back. You know what, dude? Live. Welcome everybodyWD podcast. I'm the YKWD podcast. I started social media podcast. The YKWD podcast.
YKWD is back again.
Old school, back in the day.
We're all started before them all.
I'm the YKWD podcast.
This podcast is so fun and crazy.
And there's no rules.
Shut up, you ruining this.
Break the ball, man, I'm sorry.
It's a comedy podcast.
This is an NPR.
That's the podcast done.
Is there any better show?
This is the original.
The original.
The original.
The original.
The original.
The original.
The original. The original. ThePR. That's the podcast done.
Is there any better show?
This is the original.
Original.
You know what, dude?
What's up, everybody?
It's Robert Kelly.
We're alive on Patreon right now.
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Type it out.
Let your little fingers dance around.
And what else?
That's about it. I got a great
show tonight. I'm very excited because one of my favorite people in the world are here.
He's been doing my podcast. I mean, since we moved up to this place and he is a force to
be reckoned with. Yannis Popus. What's up, Yannis?
What's going on, Bobby? How you doing, buddy?
Good, buddy. How are you?
Yeah, you feeling good?
Feeling good. I got a nice little rasp.
I had a week-long congestion, but it's towards the end,
but this is the time where it's real nice.
It gets in the throat.
That's mixed with a little bit of tobacco snooze,
and it's making for a real sexy, silky sound.
Are you, uh, no COVID?
No COVID.
Well, I didn't check, you know what I mean?
You're done.
Listen, I don't know what I, I've been to Target
if that's what you're asking.
Okay, so you have COVID?
No, I don't have COVID, but I didn't check.
Right.
And it was also a long time ago,
I'm on the tail end of whatever it was.
Oh, you know, my kid got sick a couple weeks ago
and she tested him for COVID.
He was fine.
He had sniffles.
I know who she's voting for in the midterms.
But she's not voting for anybody.
She's not even registered.
Yeah.
She's from Everett Mass.
Is she undocumented?
Yeah.
You don't know.
You may not maybe.
I mean, might as well be.
Have you ever checked?
I'm registered. You're checked? I'm registered.
You're registered.
I'm registered.
You're also registered with the city in Boston.
Yeah, I'm registered.
Yeah, I'm registered.
Hey, got you.
I mean, you, you, you so much as Jay walk over there.
Oh, that, that, that, you're a quadruple offender.
Yeah, I'm back.
I go back to DIYS.
I go back to fucking Juvijayah as a 52 year old.
Yeah.
Um, yeah, but as a 52 year old, that looks 51, 51.
Yeah.
She, you look good.
Thanks, but you too, as always.
Thank you.
You gave me that compliment downstairs,
and it boosted my confidence.
We should be giving each other confidence.
More guys should be giving each other confidence.
Women always do it.
You look great.
You look great.
Guys should always just first thing they should say when they walk up.
You look, you look, you look, because we came from the generation where you gave a guy a compliment you wanted to suck his neck
Yeah, well, you know, even if you do
Why do yeah, so you look fantastic you look great. Let's do it. Let's shut this shit down
Let's just grab fun. Now if I was gay you're you're your handsome guy. Yeah, I think you're the benchmark that knows that I'm definitely
100% not gay. Why?
Because I'm not attracted to you.
That hurts.
I don't know why.
I don't know why, but that hurt.
And the reason why is because you got amazing lips.
Yeah, I do.
You have a mate, don't pucker.
I'm sorry.
I saw the pucker.
I saw you get kind of pucker.
It's in me.
That just happens.
That was uncomfortable.
It was comfortable to that.
Now you lick them. Now you just I want to wet them
I want to show you the full fucking Monty. You got great lips. Yeah, I do. Yeah, I'm and now I lost way to the just better. Yeah, better
And you've seen some shit. It's in the eyes
Don't some shit which makes for a really good romance. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. I've seen it. I've done it. Yeah, it's in there It's right in the eyes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, of course, I've seen it. I've done it. Yeah, it's in there. It's right in the eyes. Yeah.
I am, but yeah, we didn't test. Yeah, she tested them and he had it. Yeah, so the deal is this five days
home and then
Mask for five days at school. Yeah
But it's like and then then, and you know,
test them again, they say don't test again. There's no, because you can test for
10 months after positive. Okay. Now, I don't know if this is out of line, but is
there another family that you don't love like a kid who's bullied him or
whatever, but you know, is there a family you don't love? No, why? I'm just saying,
make a play date. Well, that's a thing, dude. It's a little sneak attack. It's,
but it's a cold now. Yeah. But so when the guy gets, when he gets the sniffles,
you gotta test him for this thing
that takes him out for 10 days.
Five days out of school, 10 days wearing a mask
like it's three years ago.
And now, if you didn't test him, right?
Like a cold, you get a cold, the flu.
Yeah.
The kid doesn't know he has the flu, he goes to school.
Yeah.
Everybody gets to, I mean, that's just what happens.
Yeah, but you know, if you don't like the parents,
parents a little older, there's always a slim chance
you could take one of them out.
Yeah, just send them out with that.
I'm just saying.
It's, it's, it's nuts.
Yeah.
It's nuts.
And I didn't get it, she didn't get it.
Yeah.
So what is it?
Yeah, at this point, I think Think it I think it's just made up
We're getting well demonetized right now. I had it. I had it bad. I had it bad. No, what long time ago?
I had it but I didn't have it bad, but I don't understand now because now if you get a cold
Do you stay home?
Do I know but I'm saying do you stay home for five days?
He's built for him himself Do you do you wear a mask for with a but I'm saying, do you stay home for five days? These bills don't pay themselves.
Do you wear a mask for with a cold?
Because he had sniffles and congestion.
Yeah.
He had a stay home for five days.
Yeah.
And then wear a mask for five days.
So with a regular cold, same thing, right?
Flu, same thing.
I mean, the same rules apply.
We got to put it in the rear view.
We got to put it in the rear view. If you to put it in the rear view if you don't test. Yeah, it's just a cold no
We got to put in the rear view, but it does it keeps coming around. That's why I always called it the Hillary
We want to put it in the rear view mirror and it just another strand
He's coming. Oh man. She loves the fucking tweet and Instagram. She's like Jason for he's
Man she loves the fucking tweet and Instagram. She's like Jason Voorhees She's coming. They'll be a sequel. She'll be in space at one point. We liked her at one point
Didn't we I'm not sure about that. I think we did back when Bill was president
Yeah, when liberals are regular liberals when we're all everybody I think we're all liberals
Yeah, we're all like you know into JFK. Yeah, we're all you know, is, Bill is eating hamburgers, jogging, banging.
If you were cool, you were liberal back in the day.
100%.
It was all cool and all the suits and Christians
were conservative.
And now it's a free for all.
You really need to look at a person's hair cut
to figure out where they're at.
Yeah, it's crazy.
Shurah was all front listening to the,
the elections because it's, you know, that day.
Right.
And he had that little thing and these two nerdy white couple, they, is it happening now?
And they ran over and go, look at the liberals.
They want to find out if the, the red wave came.
The guy went, well, you know what you're voting for.
I'm like, no, you don't.
Yeah.
I was just fucking.
Yeah.
I was talking about you. I mean, I was talking, I was like, they, you don't. Yeah. I was just fucking. Yeah. I was talking about you.
I mean, I was talking, I was like,
they judge you.
What?
What?
Well, you look conservative.
I do.
Yeah, you do.
How?
Is it the bar stool shirt?
It's the bar stool shirt.
It's kind of the blue collar look.
It's, you know, the accent.
You're not, I don't picture you going.
Be like, you know, you just really have to think about how much Hillary did to get
his health care. She started it. I just don't see that going be like, you know, you just really have to think about how much Hillary did to get us healthcare.
She started it.
I just don't see that coming out of your mouth.
Like, you know, it's, Nancy Pelosi's big reason
why Medicare is where it is today.
Dude, first of all, I'm a registered Democrat.
Register.
I can't believe you'd made it that on this podcast.
I am.
Yeah.
I'm not saying I voted that way.
Right, right, right. Like, yeah, I'm a registered Democrat. I think I don't know you'd made it that on this podcast. I am yeah, I'm not saying I voted that way Right right right like a yeah, I'm a registered Democrat as well
I think I don't know if I've ever voted I don't think I've ever wrote and you know that you vote in New York doesn't you know
Yeah, it's like throwing water in the pool, you know
It's it's going left. We know it's good. We know it to deal. Yeah, yeah, but they we don't know that that governor could be gone
I doubt it now, huh? I don't know Here's what I don't understand okay, cuz I don't know about politics. I really don't know that that governor could be gone. I doubt it now, huh? I don't know. Here's what I don't understand
Okay, because I don't know about politics. I really don't I know I know when you know
I think they're all fucking lunatics. Yeah, they're all fucking it's just a it's a job and if you fucking lie and cheat
You can make more money at yeah, it's it's it's the mom, but it's opened up to everybody now just like comedy
I mean look at Federman. I mean, you know, the guy in Pennsylvania running against
Dr. Rose. I was just going to bring that up. Yeah. I mean, look at that guy. I mean, that
guy, I mean, they just pulled it. I mean, is that maybe Shangulous is dead. At least that
uncle or cousin. Yeah. Yeah. At least he's, he's definitely had a couple of Micheloblites
with a shade. I mean, that guy, I mean, they put it in the bag of a pickup truck.
Yeah.
But if he wins, you have to, you have to, you have to, you have to wonder what the fuck is
wrong with people in Pennsylvania.
Yeah, I mean, well, you know, their options are a guy who just recently had a stroke,
and the other guy is a fake doctor from television.
Yeah.
So it's really, we're really, we're, we're wheeling out the top now.
It's nuts.
I bet mush wins governor of San Diego.
Hey, mush could.
Yeah.
Yeah, mush could.
He looks like he could be Federman's chief of staff.
That would be a mayor.
What? Come over here. Sit down. I would be a mayor. What?
Come over here.
Sit down. Can we have mush on the show?
You're asking me?
I don't I don't work.
I would be a mayor.
Yeah.
Mushes fucking
teenage CLIs.
Scared me. That's what keeps me from getting murdered.
Look how happy he is to be on the show.
Yeah. I mean, you know, I don't know if he could run up there.
He could probably run in Texas.
You think he'd win in Texas?
Texas he'd have a shot because it's Mexican thing.
There's a big Mexican electorate down there, but Pennsylvania, they would, Jay would just
ask him.
He would just be half the, he would have to check his own papers every time he did it
just to let them know that he's, he's, he's, he's one of them.
I would have to say build a wall and no abortion.
Yeah, he'd have to show up and be like,
I checked, I almost called I saw myself today.
And we go, they go,
I just supported my mom.
And here we are.
Get them out.
It's a abortion is so nuts though.
It's like, listen man, it used to be clear cut.
The far right religious were like,
don't kill babies.
They'd stand out in front with dead fetus photos
and try to scare teenage Italians out of fucking kill
on the thing, you know, and it's like,
look, you don't want a baby, you get rid of it.
Yeah.
And they try to make it like it's a woman's choice.
No, the guy doesn't want it, the 15 year old kid doesn't want it.
You know what I mean?
I didn't want a baby back then.
Yeah.
You think about it like before the 1920s.
Yeah.
I think it was something between like 20 and 50 percent.
Don't quote me on that.
What quote me on that?
Quote me on that.
Around the 1920s, circa 1920, before that, throughout all of human history,
there was like a 20 to 50% chance
that the baby died before or after child,
but it's sometimes even the mother.
So that lets you know one thing.
Yeah.
God's a Democrat. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Do you ever get a girlfriend back in the day?
Yes, I have.
Yeah, and when she got, you get a abortion?
Yeah, we did get an abortion, yeah.
But after it was born, I did it.
That's called murder.
That's murder.
What depends on what your beliefs are.
It was a girl.
He was in China.
It depends on what your beliefs are.
I got one, my first girlfriend girlfriend.
You got pregnant, I went down with her.
It was like six bills, it was expensive, I split it with her, I went Dutch, I had no
money, I was like I'll split it.
Like a check at the all of guard.
Check please. I, we split.
I remember it was terrifying
because we went, it was right across the street
from my work too.
I'll convene it.
Yeah, but it was because I was,
I should have had more.
I had to do it again.
I go listen, my shift done at five,
our appointments at six.
Just meet me across the street.
Then we had to go through that gauntlet
of fucking assholes with their scary signs as they yell at you.
It starts out nice. Did you do you know? Are you sure you know what
you're doing? Do you know that's a baby? Do you know it's six
bleb-bleb-bleb? They start to just rolling facts out. She's crying.
I'm like, God damn it. This isn't bad enough guys. And we go
through it like she's fucking Paris Hilton in front of the fucking
comedy store. We're gonna fuck hum through this crowd of psychos. Then
you get in there. It's very quiet. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, then you sit there. It's
almost like a dentist office. Yeah. She goes in. She came out, the people, so one
thing about those people who protest outside of things, they get hungry. They
have to take a break. They take breaks, dude.
Just get a time there, naps, and there's snacks.
And you're right here.
That's nice that you live in a place
that you can convene, like you could just go out
on a smoke-bacon and get it and have an abortion.
Yeah, I smoke, I smoke, I sneak in, I sneak out, yeah.
Well, if funny, you say that, two months after that,
is when that guy in Boston went and shot up the abortion clinic.
While I was at work, I didn't even know about that.
Yeah, right across the street,
because I went in and just out of fucking wasting people.
Boston's had some shit.
I'm like, but isn't that murder?
Isn't that what you're against?
Yeah, that's legit murder, yeah.
Yeah, it's like, dude, what are you doing?
Yeah, you should have thought this through.
Yeah. Like God doesn't want you to do what are you doing? Yeah. You should have thought this through. Yeah.
Like God doesn't want you to do this too, right?
Right.
Yeah, that's the thing.
You just call it legit murder?
There's legit murder, yeah.
There's no protest on either side of that one.
Everyone's, I think, on board.
That that one would be completely murder.
Right.
Yeah, it's sucked.
It wasn't a good,
anybody who's gotten abortion, it's not a good thing.
No, no.
It's not like you're going, yeah, all right.
High five when you come out.
It's gone, it's gone.
Yeah.
Let's go get some cake.
I just wish they would spice up the protests, right?
What do you mean?
They're gonna be out there yelling at each other,
have mascots.
Well, like a, like a, a baby with its arms cut off.
Exactly.
And a, and a big suction run around.
And they can fight like a college football game.
They can roll around.
Have a trampoline, have the baby jump and go over a tree and just, yeah.
Yeah.
We're just shooting out of a cannon.
Have a guy with a lab coat and a suction just running around.
Sorry.
I'm getting you demonetized, but, yeah, I know. Are we, are we demonetized? But any, no, and a suction just running around. Sorry I'm getting you demonetized, but.
Yeah, I know.
Are we demonetized?
No, it's probably limited monetization at this point.
Yeah, probably.
Well look, what's we said COVID, yeah.
Yeah, all right, that's probably worst than what I'm saying.
Yeah, as far as they go.
I don't know, man, it's just,
I mean, we're so far beyond it. We have kids.
We have, I have a kid that's like,
look man, I'm just trying to raise this kid
not to be what I was.
Yeah.
I don't get time.
I can't really listen to any politician
or anyone who doesn't have kids in their opinion anymore.
Yeah.
Because yeah, you just realize you're not a productive part of what keeps
human civilization going and you're just selfish. So I can't really take what you're saying
seriously. Right. Because you don't really care until you have a kid. Yeah. You know, because when
you don't have a kid, you're like, you want to do reckless stuff. And then when you're older,
you want everyone to burn because you're upset that you're going have a kid, you're like, you want to do reckless stuff, and then when you're older, you want everyone to burn
because you're upset that you're gonna die soon.
So I like the people in the middle who have kids,
because they care.
They're caring about the next generation,
they care about the future, they care about the now.
Yeah.
So they're really the ones who should really.
Care about the neighborhood.
Care about the neighborhood.
Yeah, you care about a lot of things.
Yeah, they protect it.
Yeah.
They care about who's moving in the next door.
How fast cars are going?
I bought the signs.
Did you, you're one of those, huh?
I bought the yellow flip outs.
Are you one of the guys who runs out in his rope?
Hey, hey.
I bought two of them.
I put one down the end of the street
in front of my neighbor's house
and I put one in front of my house.
He said, slow down.
Every day, I gotta go move him with some dick.
I keep moving him off, like put him on my grass.
Like, yeah, slow the fuck down.
Slow down, there's kids playing here.
Yeah, there's kids on the block and you're driving.
Like, you know, you're on the highway.
And nothing, you know what it is to, man?
You know what, I just, the certain people who,
and I get it,
but people who drive fast in a neighborhood,
it's just like, where are you going?
How much sooner are you gonna get there?
It's crazy.
So that proves to me that I want to think,
I am fucking finished.
Yeah.
I'm finished.
Well, you're living for a next generation.
You've started living for your kid.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. for your kid. Yeah.
Yeah.
Not my kid, all the kids on the block.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm kind of mad because the guy around the block
bought the, I got the little flip out signs like, you know,
the janitor uses when the floor is wet.
Yeah.
Uh, what's slow down kids at play.
The guy around the block got the actual kid one.
Uh, that's running. It's so much better. And it lights kids at play. The guy around the block got the actual kid one.
That's running.
It's so much better.
And it lights up at night.
Gotta get the reflective turtle guy.
What's that?
It's a little like school kid turtle that's walking
because that's what people know to slow down.
Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.
That's what he got.
Yeah, he got that one.
You thought I was just a kid?
Yeah, it looks like a little kid.
Now my question to Mike.
Looks like you.
Yeah, my question to Mike is this,
and this was concerns me as a parent. How do you know about that sign not having kids?
That's like knowing about the movie frozen without kids. I'm going, who are you trying
to impress? Right. And what driven? You see that's a good cover. Yeah, that's a good cover.
That's a good cover. Yeah, pull up the child registry right now. Well, it's a very common name.
There's a couple of them.
The Petty app looks like his face.
He even had another defense.
He's like, it's a common name.
Oh, the end of a picture came up.
That's a common picture.
Yeah, a common face, common face.
Structure.
It's a common address.
Yeah, I want to know where every sexual predator is
within 20 feet now.
I'm constantly on that app.
Really?
Yeah, I don't go on it.
Oh, I stalk those people. No, I don't go on it. I don't want to know. You want to start killing them with me? No, no'm constantly on that app. Really? Yeah, I don't go on it. Oh, I stalk those people.
No, I don't go on it.
I don't want to know.
You want to start killing them with me?
No, no, no.
I want to start a fight club where we kill fucking pitos.
I want my kid to fucking survive.
Hobby list feel.
You want to feel me?
You said you want to protect the neighborhood?
Yeah, if you want, I mean, are we talking serious?
You want to just protect it with signs
or you want to really service your country?
So you got the app on your phone right now?
I don't have the app on your phone right now. I
Don't have the app in my phone. Okay. I was just doing the bit. God damn it. You fucking put you showed the strings
I'm sorry because I was gonna pull it up now. Yeah, you put it if he was on stage downstairs. I should have just I should have just go on the North and just yeah, fuck them. Ah
Nine pedophiles down at the table downstairs. It would fucking let up like a crispy tree here.
Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
That sucks that you're on a petty app, you know what I mean?
It's just brutal.
I know you're a piece of shit and you bang kids and you tried to.
But and it gives the stats, right?
It gives you stats like you're like, like you playing for the dolphins.
It gives exactly what you did, what your record is, yeah.
Yeah.
I'd say, wow.
Yeah, you're rookie year when you got in,
you made me, yeah.
It was a misdemeanor.
Yeah, it was a misdemeanor in 1996.
I was a rookie, you know, he's like,
yeah, this is a rookie year.
Yeah, you won the Heisman three years later.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You banged two kids in the neighborhood.
Yeah.
Now, you kidnap one kid, took him over state lines. Yeah. No, you kidnapped one kid. Yeah.
Took him over state lines.
I was like, wow, this guy's a triple, triple threat.
He's got, you can kidnap, molest, and kill.
He's good.
Do you get mad when you see the stories about women
and young boys?
I'm sorry.
What did you say to me?
Do you get mad when you see the stories about women
with young boys?
Oh, you mean the reverse. Well, yeah, if it's a baby.
She's out. What are you talking? Yeah, man? Yeah, that bugs me. You meet like a 14 year old boy
Like a guy. Look at if the guy the kid went through puberty
You know look back if you go back a hundred years or 150 years the age as a consent was a was
You know as soon as you drop gin nuts as soon as
you hit puberty you were getting married and having kids you know we changed
that I don't know why I think because women went hey can we have a say in this
I think that's a good point you stop being traded for livestock to your father. I think women were going to wait a second.
Hey, guys, hey, this isn't cool.
I think I'm worth more than you thought he's going to trick him.
Yeah, you mind if I have a say?
And I think that's what changed.
And that's when everything went south.
Wow.
I mean, when they started to vote, everything went south.
I'm going to be honest.
We could really trace the crumbling of the country to that.
How crazy is it that way?
Not that long ago.
It was just men, white men, just making all the choices.
It's a little much.
Yeah, it was a little extreme, yeah.
But in their defense, there wasn't a lot else going on, you know.
What are you talking about? I'm just saying the system they had, it was set up that way. So
they couldn't, when, when, when was it they started to vote? When, when, when, when, yeah, when
was that 30s? I mean, you're a certain wrong person. I bring it up. No, I'm asking to call.
No, it was like 29 30s. Like that. Yeah. Somewhere around there. Yeah. When, when did women have,
when did we, they finally get the right to suffrage? I think I read it out for us. 30, 31, 32.
Nicole, read it. Oh, uh, passed by Congress June 4th, 1919 and ratified on August 18th,
1920. Oh, 19, 20.
Where are husband and let them for another 10 years? The flappers. They were like, let me
go out there. I like to vote cheap, huh?
My grandmother didn't drive a car,
neither did my mother until I was like 19.
Yeah, women didn't drive cars.
My mother didn't drive a car either?
No, you just didn't get your license.
Men had the license.
Yeah, and you know that part about it wasn't horrible.
If I can be earnest for a second. Yeah, I'm glad that they're able to vote and they have
to say in the political process, but as far as them behind the wheel.
I mean, they do tend to be smaller.
They should listen, I don't mind them behind the wheel, but they shouldn't have anything
bigger than a Honda Civic.
Right. And if they do cause an accident, you should be able to kill them.
Yeah, I don't want to see a fucking woman behind a huge, you know,
Chevy Tahoe. That scares the shit out of me.
They shouldn't be allowed to buy that. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, you should be a certain height like a roller coaster.
Most of the kid got like four year old.
Yeah, the sea should have a like a scale on it.
And if you don't weigh a 200, you can't get that car.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. That happens in Texas all the time.
There are husbands buy that shit for them because they know
They're wife's gonna hit something, but at least her wife will still be safe. Yeah, they'll murder another family
But as long as they're good. Yeah, the Camry. Yeah, but it's she'll be fine. That bitch will be fine
I tell you my wife goes to the grocery store by foot, right?
You let her drive? Honda Honda Sierra. What are you?
Commune? Honda Sierra. I'm gonna give her a fact.
She doesn't drive my truck.
Okay, good.
But I mean, man, being in a parking lot in the afternoon,
like in any like a wall mod or a DW shoes,
or any of those fucking chick outdoor malls,
it's just mainly girls' doors malls, it's just mainly girl stores.
Yeah.
Man, it's dangerous.
Did you call DW Shoes like a girl store?
Yeah.
They don't have guy shoes in there.
DSW, yeah, DSW.
Oh, okay.
They got great shoes in there for guys.
They do not.
They got great shoes.
Wait, you have a woman here?
Nicole, do you ever go to DW Shoes?
DSW.
Have never been there. Yeah, she does. That's not her spot. She's
cool. She's too tall. That's a woman's store, not a girl store, I would say.
Well, I mean, you know what I meant? What are you fucking breaking it down? You can't
go sit over there. What is DW? It's DSW. DSW. I fucked up and then he was trying to make his
pointy foisted. Fuck, I can't talk. They got great suburban dad shoes in there.
We do.
Yeah.
The only shoe in there that they have worth buying
is the, yeah, those stink.
Well, that's also Bobby, you'd up to your shoe game lately,
so.
I have, but I never would wear that.
You'd never wear that shoe in the left?
No, that's racist.
What are you talking about?
What's a racist?
I forgot.
I forgot you're from Boston.
Yelmed the N word is nice, but they're true.
You guys get your signals crossed.
That's the reason.
Those shoes are for silly men.
Which one?
All of them.
Oh, you said the new bounce.
That's it, yeah.
Ah, okay.
When those crowned ventures is,
you wear those if you've dibbing on. That's it. Yeah. Oh, okay. When those crown ventures is,
you wear those if you've given up.
Those crown ventures, that's,
that's she was for a silly man.
That's a Sherlock home shoe.
Well, what we got on the bottom left there,
that's a black guy's book.
Only a black icon.
Yeah, the crown voyage.
Yeah, that's terrible.
Yeah, no.
Yeah, the crown vintage,
the crown vintage on the left is terrible.
Buckles in the back, you're an idiot.
Yeah, you like steampunk.
All right, now that shoe way on the Timberland,
I don't mind that, but.
You'd wear that to a wedding, Boston.
That's a fucking Tuxedo show.
I throw that on, go to a wedding.
Fuck it, throw around well if I see you here in the morning.
You wouldn't wear a pair of hay dudes?
No, not at all. I'm a dude.
Look at the one next to it, though.
That's just a crossbreed between a shoe and a sneaker.
That stinks.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's like a dresh sneaker.
That's definitely a casual grandad shoe.
That's a casual grandad shoe.
Yeah, that's a fun, and look at this down here.
That's a shoe you wear to a fortune rally.
Right, and that shoe on the left right there. That's a so you were to do what abortion rally. Right. And that's you on the left right there. That's a you see that you. There's a girl taking over earrings
to fight you. I know this green down the bottom that adidas right there is not that's not
bad. That's on a drunk English guy in Amsterdam trying to bang a prostitute on a bachelor party.
Yeah. Yeah. For sure. That's definitely a hooligan in UK
just kicking somebody in the face
because their team lost.
Absolutely.
Yeah, now look at that one to the right.
I mean, that's terrible.
Which one?
With the buckle.
Steve's mad.
Oh, dude.
That's a buckle.
You throw that on a guy named Derell.
He's happy.
Yeah.
That's Derell going to church, dog and hell.
Yeah, well, that one in the middle there is,
look at that.
What is that?
A co-hawn fuck off.
Which one? Down the bottom to the left. That shoot doesn't even know. What is that? A co-hawn fuck off. Which one?
Down the bottom to the left.
That shoot doesn't even know what it is.
It's not finished.
Oh yeah, I do.
That's a terrible, am I gonna be a dress shoe?
Am I gonna be a sneaker?
I don't know yet.
That shoe you're gonna see under a table at Red Lobster
on a Sunday.
That's shoe over to the right, that dark martin,
that's on a guy with purple in his hair.
Absolutely.
Yeah, that's a girl with cut marks on her arm.
Yeah, he's got a bike.
Yeah.
Definitely got his 42 and he still rides a fucking 10 speed.
Absolutely.
Yeah, and then you get to, look at that, the van, look.
The van, yeah, you see a lot of, you know,
it used to be only white kids who skate,
now the black kids got on the van big time.
Yeah, bad for your foot, look at that thing.
There's nothing good about that.
They're not comfortable at all.
No, not comfortable at all.
I mean, you can't get get that good shoe at this place.
We haven't seen one good shoe.
Find a good shoe.
They're right there, Brooks.
Ooh, look at that Birkenstock.
Look at that one.
Yeah, that's Ari Shaffir should wear that.
That's the shoe he should have worn on a special.
That Birkenstock comes with unshaven lady legs.
Yeah.
Yeah, they're shit in the compost toilet. Oh, yeah.
They get their own rainwater. She's voting third party. She's got 15 cats. She got 15 cats.
She's fucking got Ben and Jerry's in the freezer. She eats it for political reasons. Yeah.
She lives in a like a tona, but it's her mom's house that she got when she died. So she hasn't kept
dump on it. That's right. It's a good one. Yeah. It's terrible. And look at that. She's that slip
on down there. That's a terrible shoe.
I mean, again, that's not, if your name's Derell, that's a great shoe.
Oh, cool. Yeah.
Terrible shoes. Look, scroll down. Look at this.
There's not one good shoe.
That pooma's not bad.
Pooma, yeah, I think it's all right.
It's all right, but it's a pooma.
Yeah.
Yeah, pooma.
Pooma's not that good.
It's not that hot right now.
I mean, there's nothing.
Look at the boat shoes in again.
That's thanks.
Stupid boat shoe.
Who is a boat?
Nobody has a, everybody wears those shoes.
Not a member boat.
Right.
Yeah, why is it, what is a boat shoe?
A boat shoe is a spary, like a spary top cider is a boat shoe.
A what?
A spary top cider.
That goes on a wasp.
They're born in those. Right, huh wasp. They're born in those right. Yeah, they're
born in those. Yeah, well, anyways, my point being I don't know the wasp is yeah, I do. Okay,
I was just checking. Yeah, it's close to you. I'm I'm I'm very far from wasp and in their eyes,
I'm very far. They look at me and they're like, yeah, not me. I look at you and I'm like, you're
right there. You're a version of fucking wasp. I see you have wings. Yeah, not me. I look at you and I'm like, you're right there. You're in a verzy of fucking a wasp.
I see you have wings.
Yeah.
The wasps look at me in verzy and they call the police.
They want us out.
You guys are too loud.
Versus too loud for that neighborhood lives in.
Too ethnic looking for them.
Yeah, he comes out with his beard.
Is he Muslim?
Is he Italian?
Is he Greek?
What the fuck is he?
He comes aggressive.
Sometimes I'm uncomfortable, like, you know,
because he'll put a, like a track suit on.
You know what I mean? And we're going to brunch he'll put a like a track suit on you know what I mean
And we're going to brunch and he comes in with a track shoot with his fucking chain hanging out and he's got how come all the books in there if I can live
Little bucks
Not one book about Donnie T. I mean, it's gone out. I was president United States
You got eggs Benny I'm gonna say that way, I'm just saying, pero no es fair.
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Daishman, mucho por Andal. I like to scramble it. It's like we hide our IP address. Yeah, it's up there, dude.
I almost moved there, but you know,
we're looking at it now.
Every day, we're looking at it,
going, moving up there.
Fucking moving, let me put,
fucking move you tiny house onto my property.
Ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I'll tell that'd be funny if you're if you just put your tidy house and my wife's going what's going I'm going Bobby fucking lives here now
It's wake up every morning. You just see me in the back smoke. I said yeah, I just like yawning get you still it
Yawning you just hit whistles
Yanno
That's a very convenient thing like you can you can move whenever you want any trouble happens in your area
You just fucking throw that thing in a backpack. And put it in my house.
Well, we just had it winterized.
So the whole bottom is all covered up now.
What I love about you is you're so in on that stuff.
What do you mean?
You're so passionate and in on what to do.
Like, you know what, you gave me a tiny house?
I'm just like, okay, I don't know what to do.
I know to turn the faucet on, I know to turn the faucet off.
You get in there, you start thinking, winterize,
get a contraption, put a sauna in the bedroom.
You get in speakers, you're like a Japanese kid.
I'm gonna tell you what.
You're a fucking gadget guy. Well, dude, I like, first of all, you're a fucking gadget guy.
Well, dude, I like, first of all, you talk about the sauna I bought.
Yeah, I bought a sauna.
I don't know if there's any R on the end of sauna.
sauna, you called it a sauna.
sauna.
That's what we do.
I love your accent.
It's authentic.
Yeah.
You decal the sauna.
A sauna.
Pull up, pull up one person's sauna.
I bought, I look at, I just, it's so good to sweat it out
and I looked into it and then not that expensive.
So me and Don, yeah, there you go.
Look at that. Look at that.
Look at that happy Swedish guy right in my and they say, I'm telling you right now, the
benefits of taking a sauna, it credible. Set four to seven times a week, 60% less diminishing
of Alzheimer's and dementia.
The Swedes love it, the Scandinavians love it.
They did a study 20 years on those in Finland,
because everybody has one up there.
And it just, because there's certain things in your body
that you can pee out or you sweat out, toxins.
And if you don't sweat them out,
they leave your body, they actually congeal, they become fucking bad things.
But when you can sweat them out,
they leave your body all these toxins.
So by going in there two times a week,
three times, four times a week,
or after you work out, number one, your sleep is better,
you're sweating all the toxins out of your body,
and it activates, I forget the name of it, you're...
Just go for it.
Your heat probiotic cells, no.
Yeah.
You should have stuck with it.
It's called your, I forget what it is.
Hebiotic process, I like that.
He process.
Yeah.
That heat your process.
It also stimulates a lot of the probiotics inside of your,
colon.
Your inside mechanisms that are, that usually have inflammation and it DM DM it DM flames
Yeah, a lot of the cells that are inside of your plasma new rilan
Good right those are wide KWD facts. I stand by them demonetized that you get the balls
Yeah flag that for misinformation. Misinformation.
I went to school for that.
It's so good, dude.
It's so nice.
I love it.
Yeah, you go in there, meditate,
put my shirt to lights out,
sitting there naked on a towel.
Yeah.
Do you feel vulnerable in there, though?
No, there's a window. Don't we mean like if there's an vulnerable on the other? No, there's a window.
No, but it means like if there's an attack on the house,
I'm safe inside the box.
That's a good point.
Yeah.
Now watch my wife get dragged by her hair
through the hallway.
Aw, B.
What?
Huh.
Yeah, it's so small, it goes right in your room.
It's like a safe room.
It's like a hot safe room.
It's a hot safe room.
Yeah, I locked it in from the inside. You can't get in. It's just small, it goes right in your room. It's like a safe room, it's like a hot safe room. It's a hot safe room. I locked it in from the inside.
You can't get in.
It's just smashed like that.
They won't come in to get you,
because it's too hot.
That's too hot.
Yes, too hot.
Huh.
What's the upkeep on that thing?
What's that?
Like, what's the upkeep on that thing
to keep it in good shape?
I'm not gonna sand it, I don't know.
Yeah, I don't know.
You're sweating in a little room, so.
No, there's no upkeep, dude.
And there's no up.
You just sweat.
I get towels.
I put a towel on my butt.
I have a towel over my head.
And I just sweat.
It goes into the woods.
It's fine.
Yeah, when you do a like a steam,
you know, you know, you got to clean that off,
you know, get moldy in there.
You know, and the wet saw, it's an infrared.
So there's no water, you're not throwing water
on a hot rock.
That gets dirty, you gotta clean it and chill like that.
But this is...
So it's basically like a human toaster.
Yeah.
It has like the infrared things in here.
Yeah, but it hypersonic sure, your heat cell,
heat cell modulars. Absolutely the modulars that get in here. Modular modulus so you don't congeal you don't want to congeal
You don't want your you don't want your micro micro botics cells to congeal
I heard that the titanium yeah, you got to really treat the nucleus on the the on the inside on the inside
Yeah, as well as the outside as well as the outside yeah, of course. Yeah, you got to cook both sides
You got to cook them
Oh, yeah, you're toast it. Yeah, you really have to target the mono clonol mono nucleol acid both both of them
Mono clonol and mono nucleol acid
Reflex. Yeah inside of your your your
Pespa cells your pespa cells have to be treated. Yeah, but if you don't treat your pest themselves by relieving them of the fluid, you're going
to be in trouble. You got to drain the pest to get cells. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And also the
the tymonians. The tymonians have to be taken out. Yeah.
Yeah. You don't take out the tymonians and you leave the pest to pest pest pest to cells
again. Yeah. Yeah. You're in trouble. You got to treat the taro manuglier membrane.
The taro manuglia, but the also the falco membrane has to be. I forgot about the falco
membrane. Well, a lot of people do forget about the falco. Yeah. I hope this goes viral
and people like, dude, honey, I got to take care of the falco. We got to get it. We got
to get a sauna. No, honey, you know, this You gotta treat the mono-nucleal and the mono-clonels.
Uh-huh.
And on inside and out.
Are you getting one?
I'm getting one, yeah,
but I'll probably get a little bit of a bigger one.
You're a fucking thing.
You infer.
That's why you're wasps.
You gotta always do it more.
No, no, I just need one and that one's a good one.
And for your listeners, it's not that expensive.
No.
No, it's not that bad.
I was very surprised for a sauna.
You could walk out with a sauna under two grand.
That's what you need. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. It's insane.
And the best part about it is you get these two big boxes
and they showed up at a house and Donald was like,
let's just put this together tomorrow.
It's too much.
And I go, I watched the video.
I think it's under five minutes.
And it was.
Dude, the longest part was taking out of the box.
Jesus.
That was it.
That took longer than putting it together.
How is it possible?
It's a big song.
It's all hinges.
So you put the floor down, you put the wall up,
you hinge this other wall on that one,
you hinge this wall on that one,
you hinge the other wall on that one, and you plug all the things in, and then you put the wall up, you hinge this other wall on that one, you hinge this wall on that one, you hinge the other wall on that one,
and you plug all the things in, and then you put the top on,
and the top seals it together.
Wow.
And it's together.
Wow.
Yeah, they figured it out.
I love when they figure that stuff out.
Now, where was it made?
Did you check?
Yeah, Taiwan.
Safe.
Yes, safe.
No, I don't know what the fuck.
That's a Chinese America.
Yeah, just good.
Well, it came in the days when I think it was made in Jersey.
Okay.
I'm pretty sure it was made somewhere in, you know,
Patterson, I was saying.
We don't make anything here anymore.
Yeah, we don't make nothing.
No, the only thing made in Patterson is crime.
Do you see that crime?
Yeah, they make good crime in Patterson. crime. Do you see that crime? Yeah, they make good crime in Patterson.
Yeah. Yeah, they do manufacture good crime.
Yeah. Yeah, that's about it.
Well, half a Patterson. The other half, the other half is like,
no, that part's bad. This part's good.
Yeah, they make good memories in the other part.
That's what they manufacture. Good memories.
Yeah.
Warm, cozy family memories.
In certain parts of town, that's what we make now.
I gotta go to,
did you see that start the Berk Chrysler movie?
Of the machine?
Yeah.
I was sitting here.
You see the trailer for it?
No, but.
Can you bring up the trailer?
Can we watch that?
Bring up the trailer, dude. watch that bring up the trailer dude?
I'm gonna say make it as big as you can. I'm gonna say there's a 2% chance. He has a shirt on in this
2%
All right, what are you what is your percentage? I've already seen it. It's like yeah, oh well you could have played along
What do you ever take it in improv class? Yeah, we're all we're all killing the best guy. I know we're killing it
Yeah, all right, God let's. I want to give you my opinion
Wait, what do you think the percentage that he has is shirt on?
Probably nine nine percent. That's pretty conservative action
Waiting on you. I would say that's a very risky bat nine percent
percent
Birds the best
Such as he may pollution
Sorry
Made him say fuck on us I'm not a man. I'm not a man.
I'm not a man.
I'm not a man. You built out of family. Oh my god.
I'm your origin story.
This is great actually.
Wait a second.
Is that Jesse May Polusa?
It's fine.
Did you just put that thing to your pocket?
I don't know where to put it.
Dude, dude, this is going to be a good movie.
Is that Jesse May Polusa?
No.
It looks like her.
No?
No, you stop.
You fucking trauma.
Jesus Christ.
Let me just say. She didn't make it. Your dreams came true.
It fell it fell apart.
You all the things you prayed for to your Greek God and never never I have nothing but the best. That is not
I'm sorry. You told me it's not true. I know. I'm excited to see that movie. Dude. I'm telling you right now. That looks good. It looks fun.
Yes.
I'm telling you right now, that movie's gonna fucking kill it.
Dude, it would be great if he just becomes
like as big a star as the rock.
That would fucking be great.
I think he's gonna become as big as Kevin Hart.
Yeah.
That would be great.
I mean, this is, I mean, look at Furt is crushing it, right?
He's crushing it and he's such a nice dude.
Like when you hang out with him, he's a fun dude.
Yeah, nice dude.
Good family, wife is awesome.
Yeah.
But this is gonna, this is it.
I mean, when I saw this trailer, I'm like,
I wanna see it.
This is a real, this is a funny, serious, goofy,
action, fucking crazy movie. It feels that way.
It really does, man.
That's, you can tell when a movie's good.
Yeah, yeah.
And that movie's gonna kill it.
Yeah.
I mean, he's perfect for that.
Yeah.
And it's his story.
Yeah.
It's the thing that made him a hit.
Yep.
That machine story put him on the map on Rogan.
Absolutely.
And now this movie's gonna come out.
He is going to the stars.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
When he gets big, Bert, make the Maurice movie.
She was born into Lower East Side.
I said!
You think if they want, they couldn't make that movie right now.
Absolutely not. No. Well, they could, but they couldn't make that movie right now. Absolutely not.
No, well they could, but they wouldn't.
It has to be like the last Joker movie where it's installed his head.
Right, right, exactly.
That was in his head.
It's been a few years, so yeah.
What was on his head?
A lot of, you have to go watch it, but a lot of the things in the movie are just in his
head he is delusional.
Oh, shit, I didn't know that either.
I didn't know that either, you fucking spoiler alert.
What's been five years?
Is it five years since the Joker?
That was five years ago.
Oh my God, man, are you shitting me?
We lost two, dude.
We lost fucking two.
We lost two years.
When was it?
No, it wasn't.
Three or three years ago, Jesus.
Go fuck yourself, dude.
We're older than you.
Don't play games like that mush. I thought it than you. Don't play games like that mush.
I thought it was fun.
Don't play games like that.
We need the fucking years you cock, Saka.
Yeah, mush, you were way off.
Yeah, you don't play games with years.
Yeah.
You'll be all like, we're playing games among cookin'os
and falcon' for a hundred years.
Yeah.
This guy just, he put us in a time warp.
He fucked my head up.
I mean, bad.
Five years ago.
Five years, I thought I'm like, I'm dead, I'm dying. Jesus. Yeah. He put us in a time warp. He fucked my head up. I mean bad five years ago five years
I thought I'm like I'm dead. I'm dying Jesus. Yeah, five years ago five years ago
My career is fucking dead failing. Yeah, Jesus Christ don't play games know your age facts
Son of a bitch man my heart's pounding out of my chest. You're going how how old am I you said we lost two years
I'm like we lost two we told we lost two to cope and we just took it
They took it from us, but no we took it like yeah, dude. It was five years and you're like we lost to do we lost years
We did wow we lost to we were locked up in our three years and you know what it's two and a half
To play it for six yeah, six a year. What is that like that yet? It's two and a half to an a played for six. Yeah, six a year. What was that like that?
Yeah, it's two and a half things are different now.
Aren't they a feel different?
Well, your peps are on a whack.
What your peps are on a whack.
Yeah, the peps are your peps are a whack.
That's why he just got very loud.
My set you have to you have to calm them down.
My son just is got my wife's phone
and he keeps just sending me shit.
He sent me eight things dad.
I love you so much.
I'll see you tomorrow in the morning. Can't wait be awesome to talk to you. Oh, maybe you can drive me eight things. Dad, I love you so much. I'll see you tomorrow in the morning. Can't wait.
Be awesome to talk to you.
Oh, maybe you can drive me to school.
Love you.
That's great.
That's great.
Everything was great to the last part.
That was his mom.
That taught.
I know what that is.
That's hilarious.
Everything was great until the end.
And you lost me.
That was your mom.
I love you, daddy.
Daddy, you're the best daddy.
By the way, could you go pick up diapers?
God dammit. was your mom. I love you daddy, daddy, you're the best daddy. By the way, could you go pick up diapers? Hahaha.
God dammit.
Very smart.
Very smart.
That would be smart if that's what she was doing.
100% what she's doing.
That's what she's doing.
Yeah.
She'll do this in the morning.
I'm up all night, I'm out doing podcasts,
I'm doing shows, I'll come home,
I can't go to sleep until 113. I go to sleep, I wake up at every, I'm out doing podcasts, I'm doing shows, I'll come home, I can't go to sleep until 113.
I go to sleep, I wake up at 730 with them.
And I sit and have I watch TV with them,
I watch a hundred of you danger, breakfast, blah, blah.
And then she go, you driving them to school?
And I'm like, yeah, daddy, you just like,
you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you,
you, you, you, you, you, you, woman.
I was out making the bread.
I made the bread online.
I was out making bread.
I was taking a hit.
I did a show in front of three college NYU students
and chips.
Fuck, confidence up the ass.
Look at him, he's like, my piece of shit.
Talking about you, trying to make the bread.
And then you have me going to the fuck,
I got to wait in the line the prison line
Did drop these little fuckers off? Yeah, yeah, I got to take that right that you can't take cuz no one let you go cuz the the bus is cut
Everybody off you want me to do that you want to wait in line? Okay, I know you are yeah evil person
Yeah, yeah evil person. That's good. That's it. That was nice. Yeah, Your acting ability is really, it's high level.
It's good acting, dude.
Oh, thank you very much.
Yeah, that was great.
Thank you very much, I can't see this.
Yeah, dude, look at, the movies are so fucked up now, dude.
It's like, when are they gonna, I mean, I hope this is it.
Well, we were, we were inundated
with shitty, fun, fucked up movies were, we were inundated with shitty fun fucked up movies for years.
I think it made the 80s, the 90s.
It may be now because it's, they've been gone for a while.
And I think there may be a hunger for them now.
What was the last good comedy?
That's a good, I'm going to go, the Jeffrey Dahmer story on that.
That was a good comedy.
Yeah, that was a little kid out front with a fucking drill in his head
That part was good. That was my favorite. I was dying
Yeah, kids got a hole in his head. That was the funniest and they're going what's wrong with you?
I don't know the hole in his head the cops are so racist like ma'am
He said it was his boyfriend. He looks tan. Yeah, well
To each his own ma'am don't judge. We've got this
under control. Yeah, I was watching that go, what is that fucking
japan, uh, opital again, you know, wow. Yeah.
Sky was just murdering people. Yeah. They should do a comedy version with Seth
Rogan as Dahmer. That would be funny. Yeah. If it's just like a play. Yeah,
like more of a fun. More of a comedy. Yeah, fun play of the Dama the Broadway musical. Yeah. Yeah. I
Ate his brain and fuck his ass. Yeah
Jeffrey, why does it smell like that in the hallway? It's nothing. I had some bad meat sent to me
And it went bad. I will throw it out on Wednesday Wednesday I'm suspicious, I will call the cops a hundred times
But they won't respond because I'm black
And I am white!
You are black and I am white!
And I am white!
And I am white!
And the cops don't listen to me!
They listen to me!
They listen to me!
I will have some brains for lunch!
I was able to get away with it for so many years because of my skin color and posture.
Yes.
My dad didn't know, my mom didn't know, but yes, I killed all the men in my neighborhood.
It's free.
I didn't mean to kill the first guy.
I hit him with a dumbbell and chalked him to death, but I didn't mean to kill the first guy. I hit him with a dumbbell and chalked him to death, but I didn't mean to I
Just wanted to have fun. I didn't want him to leave so I ate his heart
I'm just a sad boy whose mom was mean to him. I didn't mean to eat people's heads
I went to jail and they fucked me up, but I deserved it. I deserved it. I
me up, but I deserved it. I deserved it. I deserved it. I'm sorry dad. I'm not racist. Just brown meat tastes better. I'm a brown meat guy. Oh boy, I'm fun making that clip, Joe. I love Filipino, Goosey.
Yeah, he had a type.
He like kid like soul food.
Kid like a little spice.
Is he racist?
That would be okay.
Is he racist?
No, he lives in that neighborhood.
I've got to just thought of the title, Soul Food.
What is it?
Soul Food.
I thought you can't put this episode out now. I've got to just thought of the title so food. What is it?
You can't put this episode out now. Oh, I like because it's funny. It's wrong
So fool the musical starring Jeffrey Donner Chinese flunch so food dinner
Seth Rogen playing Jeffrey Donner
No You're gonna be playing Jeffrey Dahmer. No. Oh, God.
We should make it.
Yeah.
We should make it.
We should write it in.
It's awful.
It's Seth Rogue.
Yeah, they call them a racist.
Uh-huh.
But it's like, look, dude, look at, let me tell you something.
If you live around an area in this berries,
you're gonna have berries.
Yeah.
It's not like, you know what I mean?
The first guy killed was a white guy.
Why? He lived in that neighborhood.
Yeah, I think I think he was my earnest opinion as I think he knew what he was doing. He's calculated.
I think he knew that he could get away with it longer than that. He was a little bit of an opportunity killer,
but I also think he was a premeditated psychopath. It doesn't make him a better person if he only killed white guys.
It makes him a great. It makes him a way better person. Makes him a way better person.
Dude, what are you talking about? Rac racism is way worse than cannibalism. Yes. What do you do? You want to be a cannibal and a racist?
You a fucking KKK member. What is wrong with the fuck is wrong with you dude? Jesus Christ man. Don't fucking call him that yeah
It's horrific dude terrible man. Yeah, he just ate white dudes at least he just ate white dudes
Yeah, I mean he did us a favor. He would be doing something good. Yeah, something
Real like
Well, you know he he was he liked diversity
Well, not really he was not he cast was the first he made it diverse movie ended up being a diverse movie. He created
Jobs for this is this is crazy. This is crazy. He was forward thinking he just I'm saying
I mean if you think about it, he did create opportunities later on in Hollywood
Yeah for other people. Yeah, I mean dude. We have content. Yes
Well, we have if we didn't have Dama content, sometimes I think
the government should fund murders
in order to keep true crime.
I think Netflix is.
I think they are.
I think Netflix behind the scene
is help they know all the serial killers
and they're helping them.
Yeah, they love it.
YouTube to YouTube loves true crime.
Yeah, you know, Netflix loves it more. Oh dude
You said nice four parts series of something. Oh, yeah, but YouTube's lured with it too. Yeah, I mean
You can't say a certain word on YouTube
But if you're on a 911 call and your mother talking about cutting your kids out of
That's PG-13. Yeah, if you're breaking into a house and murdering everybody you don't have to sign in for that
And that's a real nine one one
Yeah, yeah, not not comedians who are doing fake movies
They really got their priorities weird. It's a wack job. Isn't it really is it really is it really is
Yeah, I like Dama, but it got a little it got a little too much
Yeah, he starts off really wow so helpful. Yeah, he starts off really. Wow, so helpful.
Well, he starts off, he starts off.
He starts off in this bar.
It's like this little love story.
Yeah.
You kind of all, he met somebody.
Yeah, well, you know, they made you feel bad for him
because his mom was mean.
So you made him feel bad.
But she wasn't even mean, she was just not there.
It was a sympathetic portrayal of a fucking cannibal.
Of a fucking bloodthirsty serial killing cannibal.
You got to give Netflix credit.
When was, they were like, it's an LGBTQ story.
Let's tell it the right way.
Yeah, you know that they got in trouble for that.
Yeah. Why?
So they tried to label it an LGBTQ. They were trying to do the right way. Yeah, you know that they got in trouble for that. Yeah. Why so they tried to label it an LGTV
Cute they were trying to do the right thing and
The LGTV community was like go fuck yourself. Yeah
We don't want that shit. Yeah, that's a fucking murder story. Yeah, he was gay for up because he was it was opera
He'd never even fucked anybody. I don't think he'd be gay as a salient part of what he did
But he wasn't gay. I think drill in a hole in a 14 year old Filipinos fucking head while he raped his asshole is
Probably on the PowerPoint presentation a one. I think a is number six
But he didn't he wasn't gay
Was he he was gay, but he didn't do anything sexually with men. Oh, he did.
He, no.
He fucked them while they were dead.
That's not gay.
They're right.
That's necrophilia.
It has.
It's different.
True.
He wasn't your traditional run of the bill, gay.
No.
No.
You can't.
Well, you can't.
We're going to add an N to the LGBTQN.
Good point.
Like a failure.
He was not a Christopher Street gay.
He was not an OG gay.
He was a nightmare in Elm Street type gay.
Oh man.
Yeah, I don't think gay is the main part.
But it was funny that Netflix was like,
hey, it's an LGBTQ and they were like,
what, no, we don't want that.
Yeah, no.
Yeah.
We want Philadelphia, make another Philadelphia.
We want the Boocah chick story. Well, milk, it was milk. Give want Philadelphia. Make another Philadelphia. We want the pook-a-chic story.
Well, milk.
Yes, milk.
Give us that.
Give us pook-a-chic coming to be story.
Did I say they right?
Keep be-peak-a-chic?
Yeah, sure.
We got it.
Those fucking Slavic names are hard.
Pook-a-chic.
It's funny because we haven't had a good cereal killer in a long time.
Yeah, well, there kind of been DNA and everything's kind of put them out of biz.
Yeah, but are they out of biz or are they just better?
I think they just do comedy now.
I found a new path.
What were they?
They're making clips.
Yeah, there's no more serial killers.
No, they've turned it.
Who was the last one?
The last great serial killer. No, they've turned it. Who's the last one? The last great serial killer.
Was it Dom?
Hillary Clinton.
We haven't found all the ones that Clinton's got.
There's a list.
How funny is that?
They have a big list of those people that died because of them?
Yeah.
Like, look, I know it's conspiracy, but you're like,
but after the eighth or ninth one,
you're starting to go, all right, I'm listening.
And four, I was going, get out of here.
When it got into the double digits,
you're like, oh geez, they're putting up
Steph Curry numbers now.
I got a pay attention.
Now, when Chris Cornell died,
he was like, whoa, he's a Christ.
You killed a good singer?
Yeah.
Anthony Baudin, what the fuck's going on?
Doesn't murder an Anthony at a great show.
Yeah.
Yeah, they've turned into school shooters now, I think.
I think that's the new iteration of the American cycle
Yeah, is the school shooter the rampage killer
Yeah, it's such a skit's a fucking well, they want you know, there's a fame thing
They love it like it's a we we turn them into stars
So they see that and they're like I want to have a movie about me one day
You know, I know I'm not gonna make it a traditional way
I don't have the talent of a Bobby Kelly. So you know what? I'm gonna grab an AR 15 take it out of my dad's fucking cabinet and fucking shoot that kindergarten up
And then one day they'll make a story about me and you know, you know, it's a sick thing about our culture
You know even the John the guy who killed the guy who killed John Lenin recently admitted it
He was like I just wanted to be famous. He lives, it was like the other day actually.
There's really, like two days ago or a day ago,
they were talking to him and he was like,
man, I'm so sorry, I regret I did, it was a young,
he's like, I just wanted to be famous.
All he needed was a TikTok account
and a fucking donut video.
Now that, yeah, I mean, he was born in the wrong area.
You didn't have to murder or die,
or die, or die.
He's sitting his car and say, you know what,
the Popeye's chicken sandwich is, I give it four crunches. Yeah
10 million views. Yeah, dude. Wow wrong arrow for him. Yeah, yeah, I'm hoping to do the other way where people start trying to do that on
live stream because they don't have enough followers. Well, they did it
The in wasn't the temple remember the temple. That was brutal. Yeah, I was really streaming that is brutal. Yeah, that's really nice. That was really nice. I was streaming. It was brutal, dude.
Brutal.
I mean, humans will fuck everything up.
Humans will always fuck it up.
Yeah, someone animals.
Not so much.
Man, raccoon suck.
Not like we see.
Man, dude, you know, get out of my trash.
You know, mice think they'll get right in your house.
But they're fucking ants, the fucking assholes.
Could you imagine if you can wash suck a dick?
But you imagine talking to a raccoon.
And a raccoon being able to know what our life's like.
They do.
And we have music and shit and they're going,
why are you fucking, why are you drilling a hole in that dude's head?
Why not just go to a Bruce Bringsdine concert?
What?
You fucking spoiled brat.
A Bringsdine?
I call him Bringsdine.
He's bringing a Bruce Bringsdine.
Bruce Bringsdine Bruce Brinkstein.
Who are those people?
No.
Raccoons don't know.
Raccoons don't know.
Raccoons, no.
Dude, they developed a mask so they could sneak around at night.
Do you know, fuck.
Dad, dude, they know what they're doing.
Those little scumbag raccoons.
Fucking cocks, yeah.
Yeah, dude, they're bad.
Animals are bad.
All animals.
Not just humans.
Let's kill them.
Yeah, kill them all Fuck real dirty little
Trashburgers they are you're right. They don't know how to do drama. Yeah, we do drama
They don't have a gossip. No, they don't gossip. I think they they might they run to my shed talking on that all night
Oh, you start here voice. Oh, okay. I'll hear him that would have been a weird twist
How weird would that been what Bobby was like they're talking under my thing all night.
They're going, hey, Bobby, kill the person next door.
And I'm going, what the fuck, man?
Tell him the slow down, they'll never slow down.
It's a weird thing.
Have you ever thought about killing somebody?
Yeah.
Okay.
Thank you for watching YKWD.
This is the last show I'll ever have.
Yeah, I mean, if Putin's gonna do a nuclear war,
I hope he gives us some forewarning, dude.
I don't wanna just die staring at my wife, you know?
You're gonna go.
You're gonna go.
You wanna know what it feels like?
All right, you're up in your house.
I'm gonna go to the neighborhood.
I'm gonna kill someone.
Do you know who it is?
No, I'm just gonna be a random stranger.
Please, let it be verzy.
Huh?
Let it be verzy.
I'll never kill verzy.
This is why all you do is-
I'll kill myself before I kill verzy.
Listen, I want you to go verzy.
I want you to show up verzy.
I love you, dude. Yeah, and then kill myself before I cover listen. I want you to go verzy. I want you to show up verzy. I love you Dude, yeah, and then kill myself in front of them
Just traumatize them forever
You got to kill totally unexpected like dude the giant's wrong
He goes what the fuck
The bomb just goes through the house and then I leave a note
I just wanted to know what it felt like yeah, but then then then everybody dies
Then he gets up to have him and he's like,
Dude, what the fuck was that?
He scared the shit out of me.
I'm sorry, dude.
You could've told me the fucking, it was a bomb coming.
Okay, let me ask you, nuclear war is coming in a week.
You got a week notice.
Putin calls you person, he says, listen, Bobby,
I'm just a big fan of you, comedy.
I saw killbox.
I saw killbox, I'm a big fan of you.
The only guy I'm letting know,
I'm fucking unleashing these tactical nukes on these fucking Ukrainian Nazis.
Okay, you got a week through what you want.
I want to give you a little forewarning.
I don't know if you want to try fettin' all, whatever it is, do it now.
What are you doing?
What's that week look like?
I'm, uh, I'm fucking a lot.
Yeah.
I'm gonna bang your wife.
No. Is that you? Yep, for that one. Yeah, I lot. Yeah. I'm gonna bang your wife. No.
Is that you up for that one?
Yeah, I think.
No.
Fuck.
That'll be a little funny if you tried to lie.
I'm fucking my wife a lot.
Yeah.
I'm gonna make love to my wife.
Yeah.
I don't know if I could, if I decided I was gonna
fuck my wife a lot in that week.
I don't even know if I could do it.
I would try once and I go, fuck this, I can't.
Ha.
Ha. Ha. Ah. Ah.
Ah.
Ah.
Ah.
Ah.
Even if I tried, even if I said, I'm going to be a good guy, I got one leak to live.
I'm going to fuck my wife every day.
I'd fuck the first thing that she said, can't do.
I got to go and work.
I can't get the food down.
I can't get anything down.
I can't do it.
Ha.
Ha.
Ha.
I'm like, what do I want to do?
It was killer. Fuck. No, I'm so sorry. I can't do it But I want a kid to his killer
Think about it. I've got a week to go kill it. You wife's probably easier than fucking her every day
Jesus YouTube. It's comedy leave it up
Done we're getting a nice red dot X to this monetization.
That's a good question. I got a week to live. But now I know what you
I'd probably go to my tiny house. I go up to the woods. You go to your tiny house. I try to survive. You go to your tiny house.
When you try to survive dude, you got a week. But we're all at the end.
To do everybody's dead.
Everybody's dead.
No, you got a week.
Nobody knows you.
You weren't listening to the scenario.
Okay.
The world's still going.
Yeah.
You're the only one privy to this knowledge.
Yeah.
Okay, that you got a week.
Yeah.
All the things you wanted to do.
I'd eat right through the stomach.
Okay.
Finally, an honest answer.
I will fucking rip through this little stomach I have.
No, you shouldn't.
You should be a good person till the end.
You go to your tidy house and try to survive.
That sounds like fun.
But if the world was coming to an end,
you'd stab mush immediately.
I wouldn't have to.
We should be in a tub, a warm bath.
Be great if you kill themself.
It's not happening.
Well, a good way to try to survive is to like use him as a block against the explosion.
No, just hide him like a ton ton.
Yeah, I would just get under him.
I would just pull him on me and let the glass go.
Yeah, go on the top and just pull him up.
Show him top of you.
You wake up five days later.
Just ash on top.
His back is all blown out.
It didn't even go all the way through.
It didn't go through.
It's not.
His back would be on fire,
but the fucking front would be attacked.
Yeah, he's a thing.
Yo, you wanna jump on, Joe?
Jump on, get him on.
I don't know if we have another mic.
Yeah, I don't know what I was doing.
I would try to survive.
I mean, you just go for it.
You wouldn't get it.
You're not giving me the scenario I need.
Is everybody dying?
Like, there's no way out.
I just told you.
But there's no way out.
Bobbi.
This is Vladimir Putin.
Big fan of Kulbak.
Hi, buddy.
Oh, thank you.
Where did you get it?
I'm very thankful that-
Where'd you get, where'd you watch it?
I watch some Luiscicad.com
It's my favorite comedian as soon as I found out he likes to do what he does
Because I do similar. I love man. Thank you so much. It's so great to talk to you
I know that you know our countries are a little you know off right now
But you know, I've always like that horse thing with chertness. Ha ha ha ha ha
Bobby
Sorry the Russian this is only where we love with churneless. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Bobby. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Sorry, I'm Russian.
This is only where we love.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
I get it.
But you make me go ha ha ha ha.
Many times.
Oh, thank you.
So I love the movie.
I love what you're doing.
I love.
Thank you.
So I just want you to know from Russian's perspective,
you have one week before I fucking nuke the shit
at his dirty fucking Ukrainian Nazi Jews.
And the way.
And the fucking Biden's mother in the pussy.
Wow, you wanted this off the air.
Put not only did you kill everybody you've killed my podcast.
Well, the funny thing is I'm still holding the fingers like a phone.
I don't know why, but it's commitment.
Because it's Russia, you guys don't have a cell.
Yeah, that's true.
We don't have bicks up the fucking Elon Musk
and take it for the Ukrainians, people.
I just turned Rick for a sec.
I don't, I don't even.
Bobby, you have a week to do what you want.
One week, a big star like you find in my wallet
you're gonna do.
You're a wishes Mike, come on.
I'm gonna go to my tiny house, dude.
I'm gonna try to survive.
Dude, I'm not, I can't murder someone.
I'm gonna smoke a stick with Ferry Z.
Yeah, I'm gonna hug my wife.
Come on, I'll let it go.
You're going to Vegas, fettin' on the penis, talk to me.
I'm not going to Vegas.
I'm not going to Vegas.
You're going back to fucking Boston?
No.
I'm going to go to your comfy, one-feet-pock.
I probably try to go find a girl that I used to date.
Murderer.
No, I'm sorry.
I keep sneaking murder in.
I have sex, and then I murder her.
Praying man to style, I like it.
Yeah, I definitely jerk off in my backyard.
You really keep coming up with the lame scenarios man.
Do that now.
You can do that now, dickhead.
You can't jerk off.
Well that's actually cool jerk off during the day, right?
Right in the day.
So everyone can see it.
Yeah, leaves falling on a bench in the back.
Yeah, I like that.
My neighbor pulls up, hey Pat, I'm cranking one out.
That's fucking wrong.
Do it in the front and your R.P. will might slow down.
Yeah.
You gotta bench in the front.
You know what I gotta do?
I gotta a little bench in the tree bench.
I'll do it on the bench out front.
Yeah.
All right, I'm about that.
Party man.
Party.
What would you do if you'd kill somebody?
First thing.
Jesus Christ. First thing, I'm grabbing a shovel. I'm doing it fun too. man party what would you do you kill somebody first thing
First thing I'm grabbing a shovel I'm doing I'm doing it fun to I'm not doing it like from a distance I'm grabbing a shovel they're not gonna see it coming. I'm going. Hey, do you happen to have the time?
Right there. Yeah, and then we can do it the body and then I'm running and I'm getting on and I'm getting running
Why are you running because cops are coming after you ever will fuck them kill them too?
I'm trying to take a few of them. That's he didn't finish his story.
I'm sorry.
I've got guns.
I went to Dick Sporting Goods.
You did.
I got 222s.
It's legal in New York.
22 rifles.
22 rifles.
I'm ready.
The cops shop.
And of course, it's almost like shooting babies.
But I'm still very close.
I'm still on a shootout.
Yeah.
And I'm on fentanyl.
Right.
There's no question I'm not.
I'm on fentanyl.
Okay, it's a fentanyl.
Yeah.
You're murdering the first neighbor you see.
I'm, yeah, whoever it is, it's random.
Even if it's Verzy.
Yeah, I can't do that.
Only when I can't kill.
If I see him, in fact, the game, I gotta kill myself.
I would love it if Verzy comes out and you're like,
what are you doing, dude?
No, and he kills you.
Because he's got the same fantasy.
Yeah.
Now the problem when you do these podcasts,
you make these jokes,
you always know that there's a few cycles out there going,
that's a really good idea.
Yeah, I know.
We just initiated the next Syracuse.
I mean, Jesus Christ.
He does everything to a tee.
He jerks off in his front yard.
Yeah.
Then it goes into Hampshire and gets a tiny house.
And he's fucking murders everybody.
I thought with the cops.
Yeah.
That's why he's gotta put a warning on these things.
Like don't try this at home, he's just joking.
Yeah.
Jesus Christ, man.
I don't know, but I'm just kidding.
I am nobody.
You know what?
It's serious that, you know, that type of stuff.
I mean, why?
What holds these countries back
from just pushing the button and throwing some nukes over?
Man, I hope it's I hope it's something dude because we did it and it solved our problem quick
We dropped two and Japan was like yo. Yeah
Japan was like look dudes that second one was like that blow in MMA after the guys already knocked off and the
The ref is a little late to pulling you off. Yeah, you, you didn't need that second one. He was already out.
Yeah.
The second one, you punch him, knock him out,
and then he goes to the camera and hits his head,
and then as it's bouncing back up,
you punch them again.
You didn't need that second one.
Now we didn't need this second one.
Why did we do the second bomb?
Just didn't need it.
The ref wasn't there, ref was late.
There was one guy that survived the first one, then went to Nagasaki and happened to get there God that's horrible
Wow, yeah, Jesus imagine that he he God wanted him
He survived the song maybe maybe it was his fault
Maybe it was his phone maybe we weren't gonna do the second one
Maybe God wanted that guy and he got away and we weren't gonna do the second one. Maybe God wanted that guy.
And he got away.
And so he had to put the second one on him.
The second one is like, look,
fucking, what's his name?
What's the Japanese name?
Here, Hito.
Here, Hito.
Here, Hito.
Here, Hito.
Here, Hito.
Yeah, he survived.
Yeah.
What a crazy name.
Why you just took him out with a dart?
No, that's from the bomb fell from the plane fell from the plant. Oh, I didn't do it
They heard that too. I know that's when bombs didn't have any aim imagine hearing that and just going
Probably here and that go you call me. Oh, I didn't call you
Stop whistling you fucking loser. My two thoughts freaking out. What a what a thing, man.
Yeah, there's a thing rough rough point, you know. Yeah, that's a that's a point. We didn't do it.
So, uh, place hopefully we doesn't happen again. I mean, they came in and flew the plane. I mean,
they were kind of asking for it. Let's be honest. Listen, they were fucking, they per harbour was it,
but they did it with planes, they did it with ships,
they did it with submarines, they did it the way
you were doing it.
Yeah, but you know what I mean?
We did it the way we do it.
We did it, we took it to another one.
You know what I mean?
It's like we did X for that.
They fucking came and they did,
we fucking showed them what we do.
When they dropped those bombs, do you like you know the president every was like high five in each other
Don't you think dude was used. Yeah, dude. Did you see that maybe don't?
Don't you do do is a cloud look like a mushroom
Yo, yo, dude. Did you see that shit?
Don't I probably drop the other one. No, we can't go don't do it. We'll get do it It was like an episode of Jackass. I was like the Paul Brothers. Yeah, no, come on. I'll do it
I was kidding
Yeah, could be
Yeah Yeah, could be
I'm not doing and this is a string Nagasaki. They were doing the thing and they were trying not to laugh we
Today we bombed Japan
We bombed you got cut we give me a sack we bomb the fuck I do
We bombed you, we got caught, we got me a sack, we bombed the fuck out of, dude, dude. We bombed the fuck out of that, man.
Yeah, they were giggling before the press conference, okay, hold it together, hold it together.
Do you got to hold it together?
You got to show compassion, no, show compassion.
To see what we did, dude, the shit's over.
I mean, dude, what are they gonna do?
Fly a plane, we'll fire, we're gonna do more of these.
Yeah.
They nicknamed them fat boy little boy fat man little boy fat man little boy too
You know, I guess that's an ironic name little boy. It's got a big bang little boy. It's got a big
What was one bigger than the other? Yeah, yeah, yeah, fat boy was big fat boy was the first little boy was like
Yeah, hey dude you figure they go to the little one first like a jab and then come with the fucking overhead
Yeah, but they went overhand then jab
Man, yeah, well, they second was probably to get that one guy
So I'm scurrying and they were dude, this is horrible
This old podcast is done. I mean, I think it's late late. Oh, this is this is classic, but you know
This is classic version of juxtapher. classic. Versus in a juxtapature,
Versus can we just text them?
Yeah, he just studies on the way.
Yeah, man, I can't wait till Versus comes.
Yeah, I got plenty of time to worry.
Oh, okay, good.
Yeah.
What are we doing?
How long have we been going?
53.
Ooh, that's a sweet 53.
We've been going good.
I felt like 10 minutes.
Yeah, I felt like 10 minutes.
Yeah.
Yeah, I wonder.
I wonder what?
Wonder, wonder.
What would real world war look like now?
I think it would look a lot like.
Red dawn.
Yeah, it would be bad.
I think real war would be bad.
Yeah, yeah. it's all drones and
I don't think there's any silver lining on that one. Yeah, you can't they can't if it happens. It's over
I think it's done dude. Have you ever seen like the tests when they test one in the water? Oh, I mean it is so
And those out of it the like that's a yeah, that's not the big one
I can't believe they would do that to fish too.
Dude, I'd feel the same way.
Yeah, a fish are just like, and chilling.
Yeah, dude.
I just fucking, blah, blah.
They're not even, like, the fish that go right away.
But the fish on the outside, like, it's just the fucking ears hurt.
Oh, there's some fucking killer whale.
Looks like the toxic avenger for the rest of his life. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, the rest of his life. Oh, you're like, why?
They have to have like meetings.
Yeah.
Well, they all meet by a quarry.
Oh, I'm doing better today.
I'm doing better today, but yes, it was tough.
I heard a loud noise.
There's a motorboat.
I was like, I'm going to get in.
They're all traumatized.
Yeah.
It's the fish with one eye. He can only swim left.
Just do circles all the way down to a burruda.
Nobody even thinks about what they did to the fish.
Should those fish, I don't, not even to mention,
like the bottom of the ocean, like what,
what does that look like?
I know.
What does that look like?
Isn't it crazy?
And they did it in such a nice place.
You know what I mean?
It's not, it, do it in Jersey.
Throw it on Elizabeth.
New Jersey.
Yeah.
They did it in like this tropical, beautiful place
and they just fucked it up.
Yeah.
Was it like off the coast of Hawaii somewhere
or something?
Yeah.
Yeah, that's not cool.
Isn't it funny though that that's what humans have done?
They're like testing these massive explosions
that kill people.
That they know they can never release
because if they do, the nuclear fallout and the radiation
and they'll be return fired nukes and it'll all go,
but still we're like tested of, we're making them.
It's really, we're a weird species man.
I'm telling you we're a weird species. Are we any weirder than anything else though. I think there is
There is what's up, Baba?
How you doing man? I got you look nuts
He's bringing the the energy is about to change the energy is about to change
He just you just got off a hot set till you did good didn't you?
I'd fun yeah
I had fun yeah I had fun means I crushed it yeah I had fun means don't I kill tell him no tell him
though in the scenario I wouldn't kill you yeah tell him if if Vladimir Putin called me up and said I
have a you have a weak Bobby yeah do it in the voice. Let him get the flow of spirit. Well, they do have a week.
I'm going to blow the whole world up.
And I said, I want to know what murder feels like.
I'm going to kill someone.
If I know I'm going to die in a week,
and they said, would you kill Versey?
I said, right, kill myself.
Oh, man.
But I said, you come over and kill him.
But why would you want to kill somebody?
Just know it.
That's him.
That's him.
He says if the world's ending, he's murdering somebody right.
That's a thing now.
I think in then you'd be different.
You'd be hunkered down crying.
What would you do if it was a week if you had a week to live?
If Vladimir Plurton called you said he was a big fan
of yours.
I know that I just asked right.
You'd get a horse.
No, you'd go still a horse and ride around on a ship.
You know what I would do?
You'd get the whitest fucking car.
And I'm gonna tell you.
No, because we're gonna I got a week.
You want to know what I really do?
Yeah.
I would have everybody that I love, family, and friends
over if they'd come.
Yeah.
And I would get the greatest bottles of wine
and I would play cards until the fucking hit.
We would play cards.
Oh, week?
We would play cards in Crank.
It would be a party.
It would be a first party.
Not stop party.
So nobody wants to stay at a party for a week.
Dude, by the time you've done party in my house,
you don't want to die.
You know? Yeah, dude. Two days in, we're gonna wanna die. You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, dude.
Two days in, we're gonna be like,
dude, I don't want any more wine.
I'm gone.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I drink.
Yeah.
Oh yeah, I'd fucking come off.
I'm definitely getting a pack of cigarettes.
Dude, I'm getting cigarettes.
I'm getting fucking weed.
The best weed I can get, I'm getting a brandy or a scotch.
I'm getting a tumbler.
I'm getting one of those round ball ice cubes and I'm gonna fucking smoke on opus X.
I can't just I can't you just glaze over what I'm seeing here. You look fucking fantastic man. Congratulations. I can't just walk in. You can't just walk in your start talking.
I was just like I'm not seeing something here. What do you want me to just sit here and act and ignore it? Yeah, yeah, you can't.
No, I can't.
You look fucking fantastic.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Congratulations. Congratulations. Congratulations wife fucking stole it. She wore it today.
I fucking, I gotta give me it.
She's like, what, my sweatshirt, I stole it back from her.
What is it like with the clothes now?
Did you get, did you just have to get rid of shit?
Yeah, I gotta get rid of it.
I still gotta get rid of more shit
because I lost more weight so my clothes look ridiculous.
I had to wear a 3xT, which is tall,
because I needed the tall because my stomach was so big when I put my hands up, if I had to wear a 3xT, which is tall, because I needed the tall, because my stomach was so big,
when I put my hands up,
if I had a right, without the T, a regular 3x,
my stomach would pop out.
Why don't you give it to a black guy to wear for a barbecue?
You know what the great thing about this is?
What?
They like long t-shirts.
Why are you saying they?
Because it's what I'm to refer to.
Okay.
You know what I just realized?
What?
Dude, coach on an airplane for you is gonna feel like first class. I thought so to okay, you know what I just realized what dude
Coach on an airplane for you's gonna feel like first class guys
Dude you're gonna be swimming in the shitty seat. You're gonna go I I had first class back from Skankfest. I got this my flight
They put me in a middle seat in
Comfort plus I
Was great. I was fine fucking perfect. I took my shoes off.
Cross my legs.
I haven't crossed my legs in a plane, ever.
Ever.
Oh man, that's great.
Yeah, it's phenomenal.
Yeah.
I love it, I love it.
I love, you know, I love it.
But you're not, you gotta change,
like the eating is just, you're on a whole different diet now?
No, I just, I, now I can eat whatever I want.
I just don't eat a lot of it and I, but I still eat healthy.
You know, I still not fucking with sugars,
not fucking with chips.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I just eat healthy.
I eat, uh, you know, I still do protein shakes
because I'm working out a lot, lift weights.
Yeah, good work, man.
It looks great.
You're a good looking kid too.
Yeah, I see it's just a warm-in.
We talk about it.
This is, this is so funny. You too. What? You too. You fucking, it looks great. You're a good looking kid too. So you can see it's just a warm-in. We talk about that. This is so funny.
You too.
What?
You too.
You fucking, you got the fucking Greek in the walk.
The good look, you've been good looking.
You just good looking.
You're looking, you know you're both good looking.
Yeah, I'm all right.
I'm all right.
I'm not too hot out.
You guys are both and you guys brought me back into the club.
You brought me back.
I've been out of the club and now I'm back in the club.
You're like, dude, keep this up. You're a good looking kid. You can hang with us. No, you're
going to get me a chain. I bet I bet the next thing you guys both got it. He find out.
How do you know about that? We're going to put it around you, too. Like the way Obama does for
the. Yeah, he's going to get one side and I'm going to get the other. We're going to put it around.
Listen, welcome to the club. But this clone we're giving you right now. That's what it around. Yeah. Listen, welcome to the club. This
cologne we're giving you right now. That's what it is. You
get delivered a clothe. Now, what did your wife say about all this?
Is your wife just like, is she just thrilled? You know what? In
the last few weeks, yeah, last month, I would say, because I,
you know, it's, you know, I'm just, you know, I still have way
to lose. Yeah, yeah, you know, I'm not there. Right.
I still have, you know, some weight, you know, but.
It's a lifestyle. Never ends.
In the last few weeks, I'm leaving the house and she's like,
yeah, you look good.
Like, but not, can I say something?
Not, not you look good.
Like, baby, you look so good.
It's almost like, yeah.
You look good, man.
Don't fuck, you better not fucking be an idiot.
Yes, but I'm gonna tell you,
and this is not just respect to your wife,
but I think deep down inside,
some of them they resent it a little.
I think you're right.
They resent it, like I've seen my wife
and she'll go like, I'll go,
I gotta eat good cause I gotta lose weight
and she'll go, no let's do a meal plan together.
Like they try to make it like with them.
Yeah.
Cause they don't like,
they deep down inside, don't love it.
No. They don't want you to get.
No. They like me, they like, she like me.
Fucking, I'm never going anywhere. Yeah. No one's ever going to fuck this. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Go. Yeah. Take care of the backyard. Win through. I
was the backyard chubby. That's when I'll have soup and I have I have
sausage soup for you. Yeah. With a loaf of bread. And you can sit and watch
your shows. Yeah. They don't love. I hope that they don't love when we thrive.
You hope they're not going to hear this. They don't love when we thrive.
No. They they scares them when when we thrive. They hope they're not gonna hear this. They don't love when we thrive. No. They go,
They scares them.
No, when we thrive, they go,
okay, like we'll see, they're very,
you notice how it's very, you know,
arms length when we start doing good,
because then they start putting on themselves.
Yeah, I walked out of the house today
and she went, you look good.
Yeah, good.
And it wasn't a, I was like, what the fuck was that?
Like, yeah, she was like disappointed.
Like, you're going out, you look great.
And, you know, look, I'm not gonna,
I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna get caught
fucking other girls.
No. I mean, I'm not gonna fuck other girls.
Right, well, that was weird.
Yeah.
No, I'm done.
Yeah, I went back to the deal.
I'm cool.
Yeah, yeah, I'm good.
Yeah, I wouldn't even know how.
I don't know how.
It's been so long, you know.
Now, I don't even know what to say to him. Yeah, I try. Like, I don't even know how. I don't know how. It's been so long, you know. I don't even know what to say to him.
Yeah, I try.
Like, I don't even know how to kiss him.
What do you do?
Like, back in the day, I was a pro.
I could just, I knew the moment to fucking put your lips on another girl's lips.
I knew when to say this and say that and move in a little close and listen to her and then that, you know, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, you know that, that's what. Moving a little closer, listen to her.
Yeah, me and my wife do do that shit.
Hi, see you later.
I'll get max.
Bye.
Yeah.
You know, I love you so much.
I love you.
Yeah.
The only time my wife really passionately kisses me, when I sit, when I'm leaving early
in the morning, and she wants you to take to school.
No, when she's sleeping and I wake her up and I'm like,
baby, I'm going to go and she'll give me like this, like really deep kiss
and she'll be, baby, be good.
Call me, let Jesus.
And I'm like, fuck, baby, I shouldn't go.
Yeah, you know, I don't get that.
Yeah, it's weird.
I don't like that either.
No, you don't get any in it?
No, kiss.
I get like a kiss good by love you.
Like, yeah, yeah, I don't get like that.
Am I grandfather kissing? I don't get any of them. No, kiss. I get like a kiss good by love you, like yeah. Yeah, I don't get like that.
Am I grandfather kissing me?
I don't.
I don't get like that.
I don't get like a kiss good by love you, like yeah.
Yeah, I don't get like that.
Am I grandfather kissing me?
I don't get like that.
Yeah, what is it with these fuck?
No, they spent, they, they spent, they, they spent,
they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent,
they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent,
they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent,
they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent,
they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent,
they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent,
they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent,
they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent,
they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent,
they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they spent, they. They love us, but they on their way their term, you know
It's yeah, but they don't want nothing to do with us anymore
It's okay. We can we talk oh, we got to talk about this
I can we go get a table made with saving for a bit though what you might want to say that for your bit to make it a bit
I don't care. Okay, I don't do it. What is what it is what is so this is great
Stacy Stacy and I
Stacy and I'm I'm pulling to the stop and shop pee pot shit
How do you know how do you know the pee pot shit? Yeah, so I pull into the fucking
Fuck is that so I pull in what do you got the ball on the steering wheel?
So I pull in what do you got the ball on the steering wheel?
Guys pull it. I pull it. Yeah, and me instead we got into it. We got into it You know, it was a bit was one where it was just like I
Needed to walk out of the house and I needed a vent. I needed a friend
You know, it was just I'm looking through the phone and I'm like I just need somebody's ear now because it's just not you know
So I call you on
I should have nothing. Yeah, what's up, man? You know, he's like in a good mood to you
So I just go you you know something, dude?
I was like, I gotta tell you, man, it's about them.
And with the fuck they want sometimes,
I'm like, do not even listen in and like, they don't,
and I'm just fucking laying it on heavy.
And I go, fuck, and this fucking dude just goes,
yeah, and I'm listening to him.
Like, I'm waiting for some good, and he just goes,
yeah, you know, sometimes I go through stuff, though.
You gotta understand their bodies and everything, right? And I go like this, and at first I'm going, yeah, yeah,, sometimes I go through stuff though. You got to understand their bodies and everything, right?
And I go like this and at first I'm going, yeah, yeah, and then I go, wait a minute. I go things are gonna go it. You ready?
He goes, yeah, I can't give him all the fucker. I go, he fuck, yeah, they go through to, you know, their chemicals and hormones.
Sometimes I can't even, I'm going like, what the fuck? I was in a good place.
Fuck you.
Yeah, and I go, I'm sitting there like this, like thinking it's gonna go, like he's gonna tell me.
Yeah.
He's in a great place with his girl.
Okay.
There's nothing worse.
I mean, can you just give me a couple, yeah, I feel it.
I understand.
It was a one fuck damn fuck.
Yeah, don't make it hurt, make it them.
Dude, it'll be fine, don't, you know.
Yeah.
And then another time.
And then another time. I've started to realize I don't like it mentally healthy
Yodas, yeah, no, no, I'm talking to him one time and I'm telling him a real deep thing
Yeah, and he's being kind of like just passive you see this great. Yeah, yeah
Yeah, so I got these on and I'm talking to him going to you know
I don't know what to do because I got to make sure that my kids do this and I'm gonna hold thing and he's just go
Yeah, yeah, and he goes I'm sorry I don't barely pay attention those sneakers are gorgeous
I wanted to look down I was struggling
I was like try that it wouldn't be rude so the whole time I'm like it was hard to listen because I just want to take a peek
He goes he goes now dude I think it's gonna work out dude how much were them?
It's like what is that? Is there a seed there? It's like, what is that?
Is there a seed there?
It's like, what is that?
Is there a seed there?
It's like, what is that?
Is there a seed there?
It's like, what is that?
Is there a seed there?
It's like, what is that?
Is there a seed there?
It's like, what is that?
Is there a seed there?
It's like, what is that?
Is there a seed there?
It's like, what is that?
Is there a seed there?
It's like, what is that?
Is there a seed there?
It's like, what is that?
Is there a seed there? It's like, what is that? Is there a seed there? It's like, what is you know, if it's me, I go with you. Right, of course you do.
Hard.
You go, you're on the team.
Oh, now I go hard, I go listen, you get divorced, it's her loss.
I go, I go for, I go for, I go for, I go for,
I'm glad you got money for a lawyer, I go hard.
I'm not hard.
Versus will help you bury the bond.
Yeah, no, no, you'll get full, I want you to get full custody.
I'll help you try to find a lawyer to get full custody.
I don't want full custody.
I'm talking about we, I don't want weekends.
I'll take two Mondays and Tuesdays. I've got, I'll tell you, I've got the trial for tickets. I'll fight you try to find a lawyer. I don't want full custody. I'm talking about weekends. I'll take two Mondays and Tuesdays.
I've got to tell you, I've gone to trial for tickets.
I'll fight it all.
He drove one hours.
Four hours to fight a ticket.
I asked for a deposition.
I want the cops to write.
I got two tickets.
And they go, they go, it's not guilty.
Do you want the office to write a written deposition?
I said, I'm both.
And I drove hours.
I drove hours up to big Tom's room in Saratoga.
Courtrooms packed.
And they go, you requested a deposition. Tom's room in Saratoga courtroom packed and they go you requested a
Deposition everybody's paying fines. I go yeah, and they go she said to the prosecutor did they get the
Deposition goes no just Mr. Versa your excuse dude. I got up. I walked out like it was fucking Matthew McCompton
I'm gonna kill I fucking walked out of that fucking courtroom
You be then you had a suit on but you said yeah, yeah, I had this fucking I had a win break around. I went like this didn't even have a button. I had a zip record. I got a
bug. Yeah, he he actually
convinced me to do it once because I didn't know I just take a ticket because now I say you fight it
it goes ask for a rendip station and make them to work and I want to do work. Make up to work. So I
went I did it. I made it to work. I showed up and I want yeah, it's right. They don't want to do
people. They don't want if you make the cop go extra. Yeah, he kind of either just wants to get get it lower for you or just not show up
They don't want to work really. Yeah, so I say to myself if you walk up and make me sit you're gonna you're doing paperwork
This so you're gonna you so you're gonna let me ask you questions. You get it. What kind of ticket a speeding ticket?
I got two tickets. I got a speeding I got a speeding ticket on a blind turn
It was like a speed trap. Yeah, and then there was also something with my registration or something with a stud I didn't have updated.
Right. And I just said not guilty. And then she said, you want to, I said, I want a written
deposition for a while. You do that with murder? Well, you completely not guilty to murder.
Yeah, make them do paperwork.
Ah, you know what? Let them go. Jesus Christ is not worth it. I have to. Yeah.
You just plead guilty and pay?
Yeah. Yeah.
I just, I just, I, I handed the donna go pay this.
Yeah.
But I don't speed.
You speed because you're trying to make that hour
and 45 minute drive back to your house.
10 minutes like you told everybody else.
I made it.
It's a fucking trip.
It's 59 minutes and 30 seconds.
And then he always leaves out if you're going 103.
Yeah, if you're in a, if you're in a test of plan.
I told Ari, I told Ari, if you're once that it was like an hour
and I was in the car with Ari and Barton came and I was speeding
and they go, do there's a cop behind you
and I stayed at the same thing and we got there.
Really? Yeah.
I stayed gone just to prove it.
How long is it to you house?
Honestly, for me?
Listen to me.
Wait, listen, no for the actual. You honest and I did it together in his Tesla 103, I stayed gone just to prove it. How long is it to you house? Honestly. For me? And to listen to me.
Wait, listen, no for the outfit.
Yannis and I did it together in his Tesla 103.
The other night, is that correct?
We were together in 103.
103.
It was 103 the other night in his house.
When we got on the FDR, it was 103 or something like that, right?
No, dude, I think it's one of those.
Okay, so you can't, I'm talking and getting
to the place parking and you're done.
Here's a deal.
No traffic, right?
No traffic.
No traffic. There's an apocalypse. No traffic, right? No traffic. No traffic.
There's an apocalypse,
people are dead.
Cars disappear.
It's an hour three.
See, but you two go, I may be, listen,
I may be on a little bit,
maybe I shave off few.
You two go, it's almost too fucking,
I was like, not two hours.
Dude, it's just loud on my hot.
No, it's fucking, no.
Turn your volume down and you have phone.
Okay.
Okay. Dude, it's not not it's an hour and 40
How was it an hour and 40 with traffic is usually an hour 40? Yeah, yeah, Brooklyn's tough
No, from the city to sometimes you live you live in another state
You live in another state. You don't live in New York
You live in the fucking woods of New Hampshire. I mean, did I should put my tiny house up near you guys?
Dude, it's, it's far.
Dude, I live today, no traffic, to get to the cellar and park my car.
Pull in, turn the car.
58 minutes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
White planes?
58 from here?
Yeah.
I live in Greenberg.
Okay. Alright. I'm actually a white place.
I'm not a fucking retired Yankee.
What's been going on today?
Well, red waves coming.
I heard a red waves coming.
What a pocket.
I heard a red waves coming.
It's election day.
Everyone keeps saying red waves coming.
No?
No, that's what I'm here.
I didn't say anything.
I just heard a red typhoon has come.
What's it called?
The tsunami I heard.
That's how you're in a good boat. No. No, I just heard a red typhoon is come. What's it called a tsunami? I heard it's not you're in a good mood. No. No, I just I just heard I was just
wondering if anybody got any results. I just I don't go. We want one way or the
other. I just heard of red tsunami. I just said if anybody has an update like
here we go. New York lost.
He lost, it stayed.
New York's blue, it always stays blue.
Well, she didn't win.
She won, huh?
Yeah, she won.
She is Christ.
How did she win?
Let's see.
Or all the votes in?
Herde.
There's Georgia.
I heard they're not going to know this shit till, like, one, two in the morning.
Yeah, it takes a little while.
But she's, she's in, right?
Yeah.
GOP's up right now, 40 to 39.
40 to 39.
Oh, it's not that much.
It's one.
I know.
I mean, the same thing.
Ah!
You get a point.
That's hilarious.
Yeah, those are the big races in the Senate. Right. Hershel Walker is up where where where is he?
Georgia 49.5. I mean, he's hilarious. I mean guide
Guys throughout you see he had more he had more abortions than fucking
I mean, yeah, he was just he was fucking slinging abortions
He was just he was fucking slinging abortions
Magmore abortions that he had catches he did yeah, they look like he's fucking no stats
Maggie Hassan Democrat up in New Hampshire North Carolina
The states that stayed the same color state the same color New York's never flipping dude once the last time New York flip
Well, no New York's not flipping New York's not
There's a few that flip oh, but tacky was a Pataki. Well, you could have a mayor that's a...
Yeah, Pataki.
Pataki.
When was Pataki?
I was in high school.
Pataki was in 90s.
Pataki was a middle, yeah.
But that dude, look, that's 30,
that's, we're going on 30 years.
Long time, we're here.
Do we have, do we have, do we have,
PA at all?
Oh, is that that bald kid who looks like fucking,
what's the kid's name from Goonies?
Oh, John Fetterman's up.
Is he?
Yeah, look at that.
That's, but only 35% reporting.
So you can't tell.
The only one you could really tell is that 70% reporting,
Ted Bunn, 71%.
Pennsylvania, dude, for 200 years it'd been cheating.
Pennsylvania.
Yeah, I heard.
Pff.
The Pennsylvania's always been funny from what I've heard.
Wow.
Where'd you hear that?
My dad.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Well, actually Philadelphia I heard has always been like for 100 years.
They've always, you know, a couple of bags to the back door.
Okay, though.
You know, it's not perfect math.
What are you going to do?
Yeah.
Vermont blue.
No surprise.
I can't believe they're going to vote for that guy.
You can't talk.
Dude, he had a stroke.
I know.
I look so.
God bless him, but he can't put a sentence together.
I know, his wife is gonna be, he said that in an interview recently.
He's like, we, he was basically like, what, she's gonna fuck me?
Just let her run.
Yeah, we can.
Let them vote for her.
Maybe you'll recover, maybe.
Dude, after six months, you are what you are.
I don't know.
That's a fact.
Madeline Barnes is up in Wisconsin with 41% reporting, 50%, 50.8.
These things are neck and neck tight.
This is tight.
Yeah.
This is tight, 40 to 39, GOP's up one, fourth quarter.
No, it's not fourth quarter.
No, I'm just saying.
Fourth quarter is coming, I think tomorrow more.
Yeah, half time.
Half time, half right.
There's gonna be a whole different thing here.
Yeah, what are you thinking?
Yeah, dude, yeah.
Fucking, yeah.
Well, this is just a Senate. Can we click on the governor? Let's look at the club governors. a whole different thing here. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Fucking.
This is just a Senate.
Can we click on the governor?
Let's look at club governors.
If you go above the map, above the map of the work on MSNBC, how do you fucking know all
this shit?
There you go.
Oh, you see New York is not New York's only the Hampshire.
New York's only got 24% reporting, but it looks pretty strong for Maggie.
His, I mean, I'm sorry for what's her name.
The New York girl.
What's her name again?
I don't know.
Dude, a hamster is...
Dude, you're gonna hear, I'm mark my words.
I'll make a prediction.
You're gonna hear it like 12, 1 o'clock.
Dude, we had issues with this machine.
We're not gonna, it's gonna be a couple days.
That's what's gonna happen.
Yeah, I think.
Well, they got ballots.
Yeah, they got, who are you gonna,
if you had a vote?
Yeah. That's Trump DeSantis, who are you voting gonna if you had a vote. Yeah, that's Trump.
DeSantis, who are you voting for?
I'm a comedian.
I stay out of it.
But what do you mean?
If I had to choose to, you know, I'll be between Trump and DeSantis.
Yeah.
If I had to choose, if you had to,
DeSantis is a lot younger too.
Like, I think they said if Trump runs again and when he would be pushing 76, dude,
I'm going to DeSantis.
Dude, you shouldn't be able to be president after 65 man. Sure. That's the way he looks. He looks he's dying every day
Dude, oh
He still looks good for I mean guys
77 no no he'll just like 75 but he would be 76 if he ran the Santis is probably what six not even six the
Santhus is like 50 to the santa's looks like he could like fucking like golf and you know he said this is actually
in his 40s I believe no yeah I think the sentence in his 40s how old is he 44
yeah I got he just needs a better tailor he's buying suits off the rack he doesn't look
good they're baggy they make them look boxy he needs somebody to get him a nice
Obama suit yeah something tight nice tie well Trump and him are going to go
and Trump's going out of what is he saying oh he backed off of it well I
would Trump Trump is like black man saying like I got information on him if he if
he tries to run why did he say that because he's a maniac yeah he's a maniac the
guys of maniac dude that may be it that may turn into a maniac. Yeah, he's a maniac. The guy's a maniac.
Dude, that may turn into a clad, like,
what's he gonna say about him?
I don't know.
He's like,
But if they ever had it off each other,
Trump would look right at him and be like,
I fucking mad, I gave you the shy, I made you, you know.
Trump's a wild fucking dude.
I think they're like Kobe and LeBron, you know,
it's just not big enough for the two of them.
We're gonna say,
one of them's gotta have to get shipped to my ass.
Yeah, but this kid's 44.
This kid's 44.
Wait till you're 48.
You're still super young.
He's got to get in there.
He's got to do it now.
He's hot.
The COVID thing put him on the map.
Florida's rocking.
All the stuff he did.
He's right now ready to go.
And I tell you what,
I think the Republicans, they don't want Trump.
They want to just go with a presidential person.
They don't want to go with a guy
who's gonna go on Twitter three in the morning.
Call someone and then have a lot of fun.
Descent just might be able to beat him right now.
I think people may have a little Trump fatigue.
Like he's back down there like,
oh here we go again, yeah.
Nobody wants to deal with the shit, dude.
You never learn, you're such a narcissist,
you never learn how to fucking talk.
Like cordial, just be represidential.
That's part of the gig.
I just don't want people being stabbed in the subways.
That's what I'm,
well, you don't even take the subway.
I know, of course not.
What do you, what do you, I'm not nuts,
but that's a big crime, you know what I mean?
That's a big thing for me.
Yeah.
Yeah, people want security, they want jobs, it's with the one.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
The Democrats messaging on all this has been horrible.
Their party's really just been,
their messaging's horrible, like democracy on the ballot,
all this stuff, it's like people care about security
in the pocket.
They keep saying, they keep trying to scare the shit out of them.
Yeah, they keep saying this is,
for years, the whole thing is,
and actually the right does it too,
where all of them just do this thing to the public
where they're like, this is the most important
election in your life.
Do they've been saying that shit since,
they keep saying it's the most important election
in my life.
People need to chill, whoever wins, they gotta go.
Okay.
Thankfully we live in a democracy.
Yes.
The other person won, and that's what's great,
they won, maybe I'll win next time.
For four years, we'll chill with this guy,
and I'll fucking, if it's not good, we'll flip it.
Whatever.
That's what people need to do. need to put this they need to be thankful
about the system more than the indivisible people are starting
to really worship people religion now it's become religion
it's religious it we went from going to church hasn't it
always been religious like we used to go to church like this you
don't think we used to go to church we used to go as a family
and you love the America you you live this certain lifestyle.
Devout Christians would always look at these things, dude.
Back in the day, you could make bush jokes and stuff like that,
or you could make Clinton jokes.
Everyone was kinda like, how high are you?
Yeah, yeah.
Now, if you like make a Trump joke,
the Trump supporters go, you should die.
Yeah, yeah.
Or if you make a, the other way, you're in the other way.
Yeah, it's like people, it's like they become like demagogue workers.
Yeah, it's like the,
it's like they're worshiping people.
It's like, no, our system is what matters.
Yeah, but it's funny too,
because when you see,
we got the best system.
People getting interviewed on the street,
they get women, women,
get so aggressive and violent.
It's scary. It reminds me of that Westbrook church shit, get so aggressive and violent.
It's scary. It reminds me of that Westbrook Church shite.
The way they would just be violent against gays,
violent against like the troops.
I mean, just they would do with a smile on their face too.
Oh, really? Is that what you think?
Oh, that's the way.
Or is that what you think?
Well, maybe you, it's like, wow.
Yeah.
We invent, we made a whole culture of currents because of politics.
They didn't have anything.
I'd rather have them believe in religion.
Yeah, you can't, if you don't like the outcome, then mobilize, come up with a better message
in a better candidate and win next time.
You can't be taking the streets and burning things down, throwing up resistance on the side.
It's like a crybaby thing when you lose now. Like I remember back in the day,
my Sicilian grandparents, my grandmother would always
kind of go, I understand what that meant.
You got Greek parents.
I do though, you get Greek parents.
No, no, but I'm saying that.
My Greek parents were never split.
They were the same.
You know what happened to the Greek?
The Greek, the gores.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But the Greek, my Greek grandparents
always stuck together same.
My Sicilian grandparents, my grandmother, who came here from Sicily, she kind of like agreed with Democrats. She go, no, grandparents always stuck together same. My Sicilian grandparents, my grandmother,
who came here from Sicily, she kind of like agreed with Democrats.
She goes, no, I understand what my grandfather was like,
no, but they could live in the same house and eat and talk and have a glass of wine.
And now you can't, you can't live in the same house.
Dude, my dad for a while was like a Republican.
My mom was a Democrat.
It was like that.
It really was.
Dude, it was dude, it was like, I'm telling you.
My mom and my stepdad Larry, same thing.
Oh my God.
He was a Republican a hundred percent.
And my mom would have sucked Jeff,
Cakes, cock off and stuff.
Well, the thing is, no, but you can't count JFK.
The kid was, you know, Irish Catholic.
That's why they all, it was the Catholic thing with JFK.
Yeah, she was a lot of Republican.
She would let, she would let Republicans vote it for JFK
because he was Catholic.
She would have blown Clinton in front of my dad, though.
I remember my parents having parties
and like they had Republican friends and stuff like that.
It was just a different thing.
And my mom was a bleeding heart,
bleeding heart human rights lawyer, liberal.
And it was like, it just wasn't what it is today.
There's no question about that.
It's really devolved into just ranker.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's no good.
No bueno.
What, you know, what's this podcast needs, though? What, you know, some strippers. No bueno. What's this podcast needs though?
Some strippers.
No, some cigar smoking in here.
We can't do that.
No.
Where can you smoke cigars in what studio?
Except for Joe Rogan's.
Yeah, that's one.
Yeah, but there's other podcasts you could smoke.
I think there's a studio at all things comedy
that could smoke a stick in.
Yeah, dude, you could smoke a stick somewhere
Now you can't I just did it. We and Billy went down the street
We can't smoke in a studio
You sure I hear I thought him and all right. Let me say this. We can't smoke in this studio. You're out of your mind
Are we gonna go smoke it? I got I got three Rogan's this cold outside. No, it's not what do you mean? It's cold out
What the fuck is real you what do you you mean? I was just fucking outside.
We were just outside, it was great.
It was fucking chill.
Yeah, well the cold it's all right.
Why, you're gonna go over there?
Yeah, we're gonna go over there to smoke a stick.
We got three rogans.
I gotta do a spot.
He's gotta do a spot.
I gotta do a spot.
Oh, they're fucking, yeah.
But, no, they're taping the show over there.
I'll tell you about it when we get out of here.
All right, well, maybe we don't go over there.
Maybe you go over there.
No, downstairs.
Yeah.
No. I mean, right out front, we just smoke with the heat lamps.
Where?
Right in the little thing out front.
Right here?
Yeah.
Let's do that.
But we're gonna make sure Yannis is fucking.
You guys start smoking, don't worry about me.
You smoke.
No, because you're gonna leave.
You're gonna go home.
No, you're not smoking.
100% I know you're gonna.
I've seen his face.
Yeah.
I see it and you're aligned to us.
He's gonna go home.
No, he's gonna fly home and watch the fucking results of the thing.
Yeah, you're gonna go home. What's the results of the thing Yeah, you're gonna go home
No, the thing is
Let's just go over there. All right, so you were gonna go. You were a line
Just a minute guys coming over and miss you a line. I admit you're a lion. I was lying. Okay, great
Yeah, I say we get our cars will go over there. We'll go over to the steam only four minute drive
I looked at it. I didn't fuck zero point four miles. I don't give a fuck.
What does that mean?
Was that gonna sway me?
No, I'm saying it's a good thing.
What would you get an adjective?
I don't know, you bugging me with the four minutes thing.
I'm saying it's a quick ride.
I know it's a quick ride.
Okay.
I'm fucking, I've done it.
That's my tourist.
What am I from fucking Illinois?
I just coming in.
I was reiterating the fucking plan.
I'm saying it's a good, you were reiterating,
you were fucking sticking to the,
you were coming up with information
that was unnecessary.
Oh well, you know what,
you two always try to say things are far.
What the fuck does that mean?
It's fucking an hour, 45 minutes, it's not.
Your house is in Connecticut.
You're in another state, okay?
I don't care how many laws you break to get there in 30 minutes.
Your house for everybody else is an hour and 45.
You know, I can't even argue because I love you.
So I miss you and you look great.
I love you.
I can't even get mad today.
All right. Good.
That's a good fucking fantastic.
We're going to go over the stand.
It's only like four minutes an hour and eight tops.
That's nuts. If you have a jet, It's not gonna go to the stand. It's only like four minutes an hour and eight tops. It's not
If you have a jet
You got a helicopter. It's an hour and eight. I bet it's an hour and ten in a helicopter
100% you know Aaron Bergs met 4,500
To go to Tim Dylan's party. Yeah, you know who's there? Fini. Yeah, who said who said Mike Fini? Imagine landing on a helicopter dropping 45 hundred bucks and fucking say hey, how you doing?
It was again
Who said who said that who said that he had to tell people was it to?
Yeah, that didn't land there so we had to tell yeah, yeah, I had to tell because it didn't it didn't land
It is like and I love he was like mercy. How did I was the drive? Hey?
Went to gun on guy took me took me 22 minutes to get here. Oh well, I was I did it once I won't land in his back. And I love how he was like, Mercy, how was the drive? Hey, Mercy, what's going on, guys?
Took me 22 minutes to get here.
Oh, well, I did it once.
I won't do it again.
Oh, fucking halacross it.
Where's he getting his money?
What, where the fuck?
Listen, I'm not saying he makes money.
He goes on the road.
He does green.
What are you saying?
I get gray.
Dude, I gotta get Aaron on here,
because there's a mystery.
What are you talking about?
I'm here right now. Somebody died. He, there's a here, because there's a mystery. What are you talking about? I'm here right now.
Somebody died, there's a lottery ticket,
there's a fuck, you know what I'm talking about?
45 like that, to go to Tim Dylan's party.
What'd they have?
I said a lot of money stripping in Canada.
I got a lot of money.
Dode, you know, I'm funny with it,
be if the drive was far from the elephant.
It was a drive 45, but it's a drive.
Then he just goes, but we're gonna tell everybody. It took an hour to get that, you know what I'm talking about? It was a drive 45 minutes dude. It was a drive, but we're gonna tell everybody.
It took an hour to get there.
You know how long it took to drive?
It was no traffic.
It was an hour and 40.
Yeah, it was super.
It was an hour and 40.
It was a straight shot.
It's a zero traffic, yeah.
Did you go?
Yeah, drove.
You drove?
Yeah, it was a good one.
I went.
I was there for quick cuts.
I didn't.
Yeah, I was there for just a couple hours.
Neither one, you called me to see if I was going.
You weren't in town.
How do you know?
Because you were a new Hampshire. I was there. What do you mean? I was here. I was there. just a couple hours. Neither one of you called me to see if I was going. You weren't in town. How do you know? Because you were a new Hampshire.
I was there.
What do you mean?
I was here.
I was there.
You were where?
I was home.
So why didn't you go?
Because you didn't call me.
Stop that.
Wait a minute.
So that's all that Bobby.
You stopped that right now, Bobby.
You stopped that.
You're fishing.
Yeah, because you were gone out stop.
We did that to you.
Oh, yeah.
We did that to you.
You were the fucking jump on us.
Like a lot of money. It, we did that to you. You were the fucking jump on
Yeah, yeah Let's go let's go smoke. All right. I'm fucking excited. This is gonna be a nice bat
Right, we'll put the headphones on it maybe get a tea somewhere. I got what we should maybe get a TV source
We can see the fucking fifties. We're gonna get a TV put it on the curb
Dude, we have phones we don't get fuck it What's wrong? What the fuck is that? Yeah, but I like listening to the pongers talk about the things coming in
Turn your phone on it's right here
All right, this guy wants to get a fuck. No, I like this guy. Does anyone have an AM radio?
It goes to sit in the car is put the radio on I I like to sit, yeah, I like to sit and watch.
How about the sun?
Did you tell Bobby about the sun day we had?
No, we had a great sun day man.
What are you talking about?
We had three doozy football games in a row.
We were fucking, we were eating.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, 40 minutes away. But you know what's funny about that? You act like, wow. Would you come?
Cause I'll invite you every time.
You want to come over?
I want you to move in.
Listen, here's the thing.
You're going from one extreme to the other.
Move in.
You're going every fucking time.
I'm not going to come every time.
Of course, I'm not.
Well, then I'm not invited.
Then there you go.
There you have it.
But here's the thing.
I'm an extreme guy with bullshit.
I go all in or I go, no.
You should invite me.
Number one, I'm in the fucking zone.
You understand?
Like if you guys are a pizza place,
you deliver to my house.
No, that's a little too far, Bobby.
No, but you would do it, you know what I mean?
And I also wouldn't do it
because I know you're not eating pizza right now.
Listen, I do eat pizza.
I fucking cauliflower.
Okay, well I'd show up with half a slice.
Listen, well cauliflower pizza from Stu-Len is good.
That's great, yeah, that's good.
But here's the thing.
Stole out of us.
I mean, the invite, I just want the invite wants in a while.
You guys, I mean, come on.
But let me answer a question.
Do you want to invite?
Do you want to invite just for the invite?
Yes.
But do you want to come?
I want the invite.
I deserve the phone.
You want to say no.
You want to say no.
You get the invites?
It's not a dessert.
I know you're not coming.
I could hit a golf ball to his fucking house.
Yes, three minutes away.
It doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter.
I still get the fucking invite.
It's, I wouldn't ask you to come up on a Sunday
to watch a football game to drive an hour up.
I don't want you to call.
I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a,
I'm a wanting to throw a text.
Hey, me and Versa watching the games today.
I was about to say if you wanted to face time in.
I'm sorry, what did you just say to me?
Well, you put me on the couch.
I was done saying, just be, I put you there.
Like a robot, I'm gonna sit on a pillow, a, a throw pillow. Yeah on the couch? Oh, it's not so you just put you there like a robot
I'm gonna sit on a pillow a throw pillow. Yeah, like somebody's dead whose butt consciousness is still in the medical room
No, it is too if I'm honest. I never when I I don't think of you as somebody
As a friend no, I don't think of you as somebody that would watch football all fucking day for nine hours me
Are we got questions for you, fucks. Right? Are these the questions?
What the fuck is this?
Jesus, what is it, turn us the world, turn us the world.
Are these the questions?
Yeah.
No, the feel.
No, I know.
Seven, four hours.
I tried to, you're right.
It's an hour and a half, really.
Oh, okay, sorry.
And our friend came in.
Yeah, okay.
I'm just joking.
Question for Janice, from Sammy God.
No, I'm not gay. Okay. Go
Happy was can you give a master class on flood city?
Absolutely, yeah, I can give a master class on flood city. Yeah, what you do is
You got to position yourself on the side. Wait, what's Flood City? Flood City's right there from 2012.
What is it?
It's at the beginning I was talking about how you finger, right?
What?
Yeah.
Why did you just fucking say that?
Like I just asked if you want to have dinner at Red Lobster.
No, but I'm sure you're like, what?
Yeah, no, go ahead, go ahead.
So you come up on the side on top
Okay, you got you can't do it that way you got to come on top on the side and then you hook and pull and you shake
Oh in in up shake shake and push forward so it's robby shake it like what shake it like a rumshaker
You got to pick it up like a six pack shake it like a polar rod picture
Hey Shake it like a rumshaker. You got to pick it up like a six pack. Shake it like a Polarod picture. Hey, you pick it up.
Yeah, you hook and pull and you shake.
What the fuck?
I just gave you a fucking IKEA map direction on how to do it.
Hook, pull, shake.
So flood city is what?
She's gonna like, she's gonna,
Bosh.
Yeah.
There you go.
Yeah, but I heard in an interview that the porn star said I heard a porn star in an interview on KFC radio
She said when they squirt like that she said it's all pitt their piss it is piss. It's just piss it
Yeah, they just drink fucking like they said they drink what's it called like bottled up and give it to Jim Norton
Yeah, yeah, would you let a girl pee on you? No, it's disgusting. No
If you would you picked it up hook and shaked first of all not hook in anything
I'm not getting arrested. Number one. What am I hooking?
Yeah, I was not hooking anything. Well, he just said the road map to flood city. Yeah, no, did I go the map?
Those are IKEA IKEA directions. So you hook pull shake your hook it hook pull shake push and then you shake push do it like this or you shake up the word
hooking and pulling with the vagina shouldn't happen I mean what are we
talking about here you say that you don't hook I'm saying it's an old family
secret I thought you said it was a family secret what movie I thought you said it
was a family. Black black.
What? Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. I thought you said it was a family.
She you were so quick to give it up. And you were so quick to give it up.
Maybe it's the recipe today. It's what I did as a crime tomorrow.
With the boss of accent. Yeah. You don't remember? John. No. I thought
you I thought that would be like on your house 24-7. Oh black mask.
Black mask.
Black mask.
He said black mirror.
You said black mirror different show.
I'm an idiot.
Yeah, I'm an idiot.
Black mask is a fucking ass.
I'm thinking of fucking the whitey bulge.
Alright, I'm a hominist.
Give me a break.
Alright, listen, I'm gonna, you've heard of that guy times,
presents as the only podcast network in the world.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I didn't get a fucking question.
Buddy, you got a question, I'm reading it after. I got to read the world. Oh, I didn't get a fucking question. Buddy, you got a question.
I'm reading it after.
I got to read the ad.
Okay.
You get a question.
All right.
What you question first?
No, no, no.
You want a first?
No, it's just, I guess mine's a little throw away.
I guess I don't matter.
I'll give you a question first.
You want your question?
Yeah, it's from two tits McGee.
Okay.
Is that what you'll do?
Yeah.
Yeah.
How long does it really take to get to your house? Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, 10, with no traffic, our 10. From here, the first stand under an hour.
I'm not doing, let's say, fuck this is what you do.
Okay, go ahead.
You always give me, you give out the scenarios,
we're not asking.
Okay, okay, go ahead.
Right now, fucking regular traffic, no fucking, no.
Right now, regular traffic.
Right now, regular traffic from the comedy seller.
Versus not budget.
It's not, it would be like an hour 12.
12?
You added, one minute.
You said from the seller, it's different.
You said from the seller to the stand is four minutes.
No, it's different though.
It's different from here when to get onto the West Side Highway.
It's different.
It's different.
And hour.
And then here's the thing.
Then I have to get over to the Henry Hudson.
And then when I get over to the Henry Hudson,
I have to switch over again to the Swami.
It would be an hour, 11 hour, 12.
But from the stand, our three.
I don't even understand, you have fucking logic.
I'm a two-tits McGee, I promise his name.
Two-tits McGee.
Yeah, that's the truth.
Bobby made it up.
No, I did not.
It's two-tits McGee.
Are you blind?
No.
I admit it.
You make a question, but that's not.
Let me see that sheet of paper. I really didn't have a question.
Let me see that sheet of paper.
Says it right in.
Let me see it. Let me see it.
Let me see it.
That's right there.
Let me see it.
Did you just fucking, did you just fucking make something up
to make me feel, did it to me?
I, your garbage.
I returned five.
You're a mean friend.
I returned my, that's the dirty, dirty, dirty bad.
Oh, that, I don't know if I could,
no, that's a good friend. Thank you.
I don't know if I could trust you now. You fucking, you would lie to me. I wanted you to have a question. Oh my god
That was no god forbid the doctor told you something bad you fucking lie
You would have told me if the doctor said something
No, he would he would say no the doctor said it'll be all right and then you'd fucking go whisper something to my wife
Dude that's fucked up man right here. No, dude, that's right there.
Read it.
You wanna read it?
Let me see, let me do it.
Come on.
No, you want your question?
No, no, no.
I don't want my question.
Read the thing, let's go smoke.
You've heard of the guys times,
was that the only podcast network of the world
who have injected bono medicine
into the penis of paralyzed man for content.
But now you probably wanna know
what the other shows are in the network.
Well, the worth checking out.
Our Family Jewels is an awesome trivia based drinking podcast.
You can play along with Framie home and it's right there on Guy's Time.
Feed alongside over a dozen other messed up series for your enjoyment.
Wherever you get podcasts, check them out.
Guys, time presents.
Very funny podcast network.
What else we got?
Most, is that it?
All right, we got plugs.
What do you got, buddy?
I want to just come out.
Besides a question.
I want to just come out.
This comes out next week, Sunday.
We're live right now.
Okay, well, this weekend, if you're in Jersey listening
right now, I'll be at the stress factory, Thursday, Friday,
Saturdays, my birthday weekend, Fridays my birthday.
So come hang, Vinnie branched stress factory new brunswick this weekend.
Why Thursday?
Why do they got to have us Thursday?
Well, no Sunday.
No Sunday.
We got to stop with, we got to do Fridays and Saturdays.
Yeah, I agree.
Thursday's got to go.
Thursday, let the middle guy headline make your money, whatever.
You spread it me out.
You want me to sell 300, three.
Okay, let me just try to get some people Thursday.
Sorry, yeah, yeah.
So I mean, to want you to just tell people not to fuck
a cup to my show on Thursday.
I mean, what the fuck?
Go to Thursday.
Yeah, go to this Thursday.
First, what the fuck?
Where are you doing shows?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Why are you going to New Brunswick?
I'm sorry.
Thursday Friday set the fuck. And yeah, and then yeah, yeah, why are you going to New Brunswick? I'm sorry. Um, Thursday Friday, set the fuck and uh, yeah.
And then I got a, I got a whole tour coming up in 23 go to Paul Verzi.com.
I just added Gotham. Nice.
In February, I added, I got a bunch of shit Chicago coming, Texas, a bunch of stuff.
So go to Paul Verzi.com for that. Check out the Verzi effect.
I love you, buddy. So great to see you.
Good to see you too, buddy. I missed you. Um, what do you got here?
Yeah, guys, uh, November 11th and 12th Austin, buddy. So great to see you. Good to see you too, buddy. I'm sure. What do you got there? Yeah, guys, November 11th and 12th,
Austin, Texas. Come check me out.
Then Detroit Michigan.
Then we got Jacksonville, Charlotte,
Philly, Delfia, West Niant, New York,
American comedy company in San Diego, Chicago,
Atlantic City, Emo's Pennsylvania,
Plano, Texas, Springfield, Missouri, Phoenix, Tampa,
Providence,
Arlington, Virginia, and San Francisco.
Johnny Poppies.com.
Yeah.
YannisPapasCommity.com for tickets.
Thank you.
YannisPapasCommity.com for tickets.
Yeah.
Robert Kelly live.com.
Robert Kelly live.com right there.
I'm going to be in a comics come home this weekend.
I'm doing that.
The Laf Boston might drop comedy in San, off the hook comedy in Naples,
Leviton governors, Helium Comedy Club Buffalo,
Royal Comedy Club Theater,
Toronto Independence Comedy and Brosha Theater,
I got a big tour coming up.
So just go to robbercaledelive.com,
I got a bunch of dates,
make sure you go to robbercaledelive.com.
I'll go to comic wearables and buy some of my stuff.
I go, why keyed WD, we get the regs hat is up there,
the reg shirt is up there.
I got fuck the cheques spots up there.
We're them to the show.
Oh, and congrats on the special kill box.
Oh, but wait, check out my special,
nocturnal missions on Netflix and kill boxes.
Great congratulations.
Thank you, buddy.
Yes, kill box, very big success,
but look, it's still up there at LewisCK.com
if you haven't gotten it.
Go get it and spread the word.
And I want to make sure Mike Resor is at Mike what?
Uh, November 23.
Who you is at the beginning,
because it's anticlimactic at the end.
We were literally ramming through all these,
wow, and then I'm gonna be at fucking zippies.
November 20th, actually next week
and I'll be with you at the comedy connection
at Rhode Island.
Okay. And then November 23rd, Upstage comedy and I'll be with you with the comedy connection at Rhode Island. Okay.
And then November 23rd,
Upstage comedy,
Club in Santa,
Antonio, Texas.
And the first weekend of December,
Houston and Prov with Dan Sutter.
Nice.
That was good.
Right.
Check out at jokes, Russell, right?
The cheese show on YouTube, he's here tonight.
I got jokes here.
He never came over to the table.
I don't know why.
I'm much never came back, but that's okay.
And of course, new Nicky's here producing all that show.
Leftbutton.com, that's the network you should go to.
Check out all the shows.
And you guys are the best fans of the world.
Thanks for listening to another episode.
You know what, dude? y a ustedes, los mejores fans de la world. Gracias por listening ha estado tan cerca. Spectacularismos, rincones de película y un sincín de aventuras te esperan.
¡Fliparás!
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