Rooster Teeth Podcast - Alien Attraction - #392

Episode Date: September 6, 2016

RT Discusses Aliens Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Hello. Don't have Gus this week. I'm so happy. Are you? I like when we don't have Gus. Why? I know. It feels like there's no, like, control. Are you? I like when we don't have Gus. Why? I don't know. It feels like there's no control.

Usually we try to plan something new when Gus is not here. Like these mics, remember? We had those lava leermikes, and the one day he wasn't here was like, Patrick, get other mics out. And so we, I feel like you just could have done that any day though. Who? You.

You could have just been like, let's do it this way. No, Gus fights me on stuff like that all the time. Gus be like, no, it's my show. I actively fight. I'll be you. You be Gus, go. Gus, let's do it. No Gus fights me on stuff like that all the time It's gonna be like no, it's my show actively fights. I'll be you you be Gus go Gus. Let's change the mics these ones No, we don't change anything. Well, I have to read this You would say no and then he would change the subject immediately Yeah, we're close segue. I like how Gus is here and all we're doing is talking about Gus Hey, everyone welcome to the Rishi podcast today's podcast is brought to you by Blue Apron, me, Undies, and Ring.

I almost got my pointy right. Thank you all for sponsoring our podcast and making it possible. Who's on this podcast? Blaine Gavin. Barbara. And the Emmy Award nomination Bernie Burns. I have to push that as far as long as I can.

The Emmys are like in a week and a half, so. They cut to you that because you should have said you'll name again, do you? Oh, and Blaine. The air has been playing, get set. I always get really self-conscious when I'm on the podcast with like, I'm the one person that's replacing one of the removed like senior guys, you know?

Cause it's it's got to escape it. It's a part of my recording. You know what, it's about to run the last podcast to you over think stuff. Yeah, but like, so I was on the phone with my dad last night and I was like, yeah, I gotta go because I gotta go shower and I'm on the podcast tonight and he's like, why?

Really? It was like, what do you mean? He's like, nothing, good for you son. So even my dad isn't like when I'm on the podcast. I can't stop the podcast. Yes, they've tuned in. I've had talks with my parents about things that are done because of said that the podcast is Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it?

Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it?

Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it?

Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? Did you have to do it? legal legal. Um, you also a grown man and you could do what you want. You're right. Yeah, but you never not have parents. Rebellious. When you go back to visit your parents and you're in their house, it takes about five minutes

before you fall back into the same old roles that you had for 18 years. At least that was always my experience. When you take out the trash. Yeah. Or it's like, you know, like, are you gonna wear that? I'm like, I'm like 32 years old. I'm going outside. I think my mom says, are you going out without shoes on? It's like, I'm fine. I got this wear that. I'm like 32 years old, I'm going outside, I think, my mom says, are you going out without shoes on?

It's like, I'm fine. I got this figured out. My dad does always, like when I'm borrowing one of their cars to go out to a movie or see friends who live in Ottawa, my dad will watch me pull out of the driveway and drive away. Like, from the window. Like, maybe he just wants to see you a bit longer that day. He's just standing there in the window watching me pull out

and I'm like, I know how to drive a car. See what he's like up. you a bit longer that he's just standing there in the window watching me pull out And I'm like I know how to drive a car My I don't know what he's waiting for my parents is like because I drive to Dallas because it's like three and a half hours away from Austin Whenever I'm leaving they do like the thing where they stand out on the porch and watch me go and wave I will be back in three weeks, two weeks. And my mom is always like, Fuuuh. Oh, that's not man. My mom always talks. She's so fucking much.

Are you siblings? I'm sorry. My sister. And she lives. She lives in my hometown, so they always see her. Older sister? Yeah. Yeah, she had a baby, remember?

No. I don't think we've ever seen. We talked about his sister's vagina in depth. Hey, so where's that? Let's read this thing. Where's the bottle opener? What do you want to do? You mean the whistle? Where's your whistle?

Yeah, where's my whistle? I think I put it on my desk, actually. You watched the podcast? Yeah, we mentioned that this is prerecorded. I guess we should have said, this podcast is prerecorded. This is less of a really interesting point, less than 24 hours off to the other one. We really did.

What has happened since? Yeah yet actually a major world of Venice happened what what since we last recorded the podcast which actually will have happened in the time between Recorded the podcast and when it came out for last week what is it but now we're gonna talk about this one It'll be like you'll probably be disproven by the cuz we're recording this on Tuesday So we're actually recording this in the interim from when we recorded the last podcast and when the public was able to see it. Can I guess what's happened? What's happened? That was a big solar flare. You're close. Oh, you're actually something. It's a straw. You're related? Yeah, astrology. I have not been on it. Do the horoscope for cancer. It's crazy. See, this is exactly what your dad was talking about,

but the sun fine out of the camper cord. Do you guys know? You're the big space thing that happened? Do the horse go for cancer? What's current? See, exactly what your dad was talking about, Blake. Oh, please fuck up. The sun's on it at the camper court. Do you guys know? Is this a big space thing that happened? I don't know. I haven't been on any like news sites. All right, control room. Let's see.

I got a chance to steal here. What's the big space thing that happened? Space cancer cured. The earth eclipse the sun? No. The eclipse, the eclipse is like July of next year. I don't think it clips the sun all the time. When you're in a city, Russian,

Satellite dishes have a signal from outer space that everyone is saying this could be communication from a civilization. What? Yeah, they're saying like this could be it. How? I'm sure my Monday when this podcast is out, totally disproven, our next Wednesday.

Is this the beginning of LSD? It's pretty interesting, right? Or so the end and what's what's the code or what's the what's the communication? Like they are they're saying they're apparently there's these and I got to read more into it And I did some of this research when we were writing laser team But apparently there's different classes of civilizations like there's a type one type two and type three and depending if it's a type one or type three Civilization it could be two different things if it's a type one or type three civilization, it could be two different things. If it's a type one civilization, it's a narrow, focused beam that's being directed directly at Earth, which would then mean they know where we are. So they go, ah, signal. Or yeah, or their date said, okay, there's life on that planet. We're going to

direct a message directly at them. So we were seeing something, or are we, you know, someone's signal a steady strong signal that some dudes phone Yeah, they're like so there's like all this stuff to you. It's like stuff the microwave I read a lot of forum posts about it on Jupiter apparently steady does this Oh every now and then for like budgetary reasons like But like like when they said every so often there's life on Mars Every so often there's like water Yeah, we found war on Mars is It's like the NASA needs some bucks

So they found water for the billion time on Mars But it's kind of one of those things where they didn't rule out that it could be a military satellite that they're not aware of I'm if you like well, why don't you rule that out before you go announcing? Yeah, it could be alien civilization How far away it is or anything like they know where it is. Yeah, they know exactly where it is What's that it's in the less? Curcules constellation which I know that constellation. I bet you do. Yeah, man What what it the constellations fucking ripped I wonder?

It's macros been bound to message by the left pack of Hercule. It's useless though because we can't travel You meant humcules. I'd like to make some sweet news. Sorry, that's from the movie. Poor killies. We can't live for so long. I was gonna recite the entire song. Keep going. I did not, too. No.

Bernie's gonna read this thing. No, look, guys done. Keep going. Let me make her keep going. What if the message came through? I don't interrupt you, Bob. What if we decoded the message? And we decoded the message to Woods, and it just said,

what? Gavin? Fight, fight, fight. What if it was SOS? What if it was boo? That'd be scary. It's like run. Ooh.

Or I'm trapped out here. I was on earth that one point. May we meet you in an article from an online news source. You may. This is from an Australian news source. Extra-. This is from an Australian news source. Extra-terrestrial signal being investigated by steady researchers. Highly unusual radioactivity,

emanating from a star in the outer reaches of the universe was detected by Russian astronomers more than 15 months ago. But what they did next was equally unusual. They declined to tell anybody about the signal. Despite the potential significance as such an event, the recording of the distant radio activity went largely unnoticed by the broader scientific community

And now there's a desperate race to try to figure out what or who has caused this signal Why did they have a dominating from a system that has a sunlight star? They had clickbait in the article. It's like what they did next was a My mind. That was like paragraph bait like I had to go to the next paragraph. I didn't have to click on anything to do that so Hmm Do you think they have any outless stones? possible explanations for the abnormal radio recording tend to fall into two categories with distinctly different implications one That posits the signal was a product of intelligence and was admitted by civilization far more advanced in our own and the decidedly less exciting

Explanation that it was the result of earthly radio interference. Oh, it's a steady signal. So I don't know if they're still recording it or whatever, but astronomy's not one of those things you can kind of keep under wraps. Once people are aware of it, there's a lot of civilians who have some pretty decent. What about the ham radio?

Yeah, exactly. So you're gonna have people that are able to pick up the signal if they know where it's coming from. What? And communicate back with it, potentially. Who do I want? Can you communicate back with it? Do you think?

Do you think they have that technology? Might take a long time. Do you guys watch the Martian? Do you ever see that? Yeah. It's like 24 minutes back and forth between Mars. Yeah. That's often a nightmare.

Yeah. That'd be a nightmare. It really could only have a certain amount of interactions per day. Yeah, and when he first starts talking to him, spoiler for if you haven't seen the movie, the Martian, he can only talk and basically more as code like actually like binary. Is he only because he's like yes or no. And then he works out a way

to kind of like talk and hexadecimal. And then they actually get full communication. So that would be a spoiler for the movie. Wow. I mean, it's like, guess what? He also grows potatoes. So out of shit. What if what if we are doing this So, that would be the... It's pretty big spoiler for the movie. Wow, I mean, it's like, guess what? He also grows potatoes, so. Out of shit. What if we are doing this podcast and then shows on Monday of next week and aliens have already made contact and this is just like old news?

What if the aliens have taken over by next Monday? Right. And we're just like, ah man, aliens, that'd be great. That'd be funny. And I have to put out a statement. They were on their way here. They wouldn't send a signal. Why not?

Well, if they're going to come attack us. Why would they necessarily attack? If they take over, you said. Yeah, I know. You think that would just happen? Like a corporate take over. I know. Part of me is OK with an alien being

president over Donald Trump. What do you think would happen? Chiss. Honestly, what do you think would be the implications, Barb, if politically and everything everything else if they said We don't even know what the message says but this is definitely communication from another civilization We have definitive proof that there is life somewhere intelligent life somewhere else in the galaxy I mean, I would hope it would make a lot of people question

There a lot of their beliefs You know, I would want to know immediately how far away are they how long is it take them to get here? Yeah, will it be after I die Sweet. No, I think what we'd have to do is we'd have to find a mutual, like a meeting ground. Like, hey, let's meet up on this planet. We've only gone to the moon though. What will we've landed rovers and stuff? No, I'm saying like sending something like a care package. Yeah. Like a note. Like, hey, here's a loot crate, and here's a shirt. A note from Obama, it's like,

there have been six presidents since I was in the office. I don't think we could even fathom what it would do and how it would change society in the world. Like, I don't even think I could describe it. It would probably be the most monumental event in the history of the world. Absolutely.

Do you think? Number one, most monumental. I feel like literally the world. Absolutely. Do you think? Number one, most monumental. I feel like literally God descending from heaven. There would be a lot of people on earth who would want to swap. I think. They want to go to the other planet? Like if there was a thing where it's like, we'll send five of our guys, you say five of yours.

We don't want to have five guys here. You don't want them? Do you sound like Donald Trilag. I like the idea of talking to him for centuries. You want to build a wall? It would be cool to have a communication with an alien civilization, which is an open communication. But like even like, I mean, we can't fathom all the things.

Like if they even think it's send something via information, that could somehow affect us. Like they send some kind of data that takes over all of our computer systems. Something you can't even possibly imagine. Here's what's gonna happen. They'll have a telepathic skill to see thoughts. They'll sort of beam someone out.

They'll like listen to the planet. I'm gonna be like, mm, nuke. Yeah, because they know that the majority of the human race will be like, no aliens. We don't wanna. Man, now I'm really paranoid that we're gonna get nuke this. So they would just, everyone have happy thoughts, pro alien thoughts.

Like, what if returning it, the signal, is like part of a protocol by which they just beam out in this direction and they know that there's like something in their solar system because they identify a sun that's like theirs and there's a planet here that's a little bit far enough away, that it could be it. So a couple thousand years ago,

they beam something in our direction and then it finally shows up and then we beam something back and it's like, oh yeah, that's our targeting system. And then they just, you know, whatever. My theory, grab the reticle and just hold it right away. Right here, right here, right here. If we're able to communicate with them and they're able to, okay, so if we're able to communicate with them,

they're probably at the same tier of intelligence that we are. If we're able to, if, yeah. Probably greater. Probably greater. If they're able to come to us and they're by far leaps and bounds ahead of us, but you'd have to think for them to advance to that point in civilization

They would have to be peaceful Otherwise, they would have destroyed themselves and they wouldn't have been able to come to us very logical And I think that they would also understand, okay, these are lesser beings. They're not as intelligent as us I think they would since they're peaceful and inherently peaceful because they're able to get to us Then I think we'd be okay. Yeah, why do we always assume that if we do ever meet an alien race that we want to destroy us? Because every time we meet a different human race, the first thing that happens is a war. Yeah, we only know what we do.

Which is like we want to take all the resources and stuff like that. Yeah. I've always been fascinated by the shift that happened in books and movies where the future, when like movies from like the 50s, the future was awesome. Yeah. And there was gonna be big buildings

If you were to have flying cars and all that stuff and it's somewhere like in the 80s It flipped and the future was always gonna be the end of the world That's what that's what the future meant was like deserts and it had to be because the cold war right that Now when you show something for the future. It's always dystopian always dystopian as if we've wrecked ourselves Yeah, I mean that's what ultimately had towards doom And for the future, it's always dystopian, always dystopian. As if we've wrecked ourselves. Yeah. That's what ultimately had a choice, doom. And let me throw some logic at you for your posit on an alien civilization.

Go for it. They would not necessarily have to be peaceful. They could just be the dominant species that wiped out everybody else or race or whatever, on their planet. If the Germans had conquered the entire planet, that would not be a peaceful planet with a Nazi regime that just happened to win. Very good call.

What if instead of the aliens coming, they just sent all of their cutest pets. Oh, no. And we got like the alien version of kittens. Little puppy. Yeah, the T-Cut puppies. Oh, T-Cut puppies. Yeah.

Someone at this office, Mike, are head of engineering and has probably the cutest dog to ever exist. It's a good doggo, 10 out of 10 doggo. It's a mix, it's a teacup dog, which means it's gonna stay, like, handheld size forever. It's like this small. Isn't that cruel? It's a breed of dog that doesn't grow up?

I don't care. Can you imagine, like, the- It's a dog that exists in his living and is happy. That horrible feeling that that dog must have internally, he's like, I will always be a child kill me and then he's like Endless amounts of love and pet and fed like I'm 90 years old murder me. I'm sorry It's a mix. I think it's a a teacup poodle chihuahua mix two breeds that I'm not crazy about that made the perfect animal ever. Yeah, Bernie is signaling someone else.

I am, I don't have the passcode for the iPad. So I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I don't know what it is. Don't know the passcode. I thought it did. Give me the passcode. What? There it is. Look at this dog. Why do we have this passcoded? Oh, look at that dog. Look at it. So that's a fully grown dog.

It's gonna get like maybe like another two or three pounds bigger. My sister has a dog that's a teacup maltease and fucking I want it. Why is it that you want to do violent things to a cute animal? I almost... What? I almost... You talking about it? I almost ate it. Why is it that you want to do violent things to acute it? You don't. I almost... What? Are you talking about it? I almost ate it.

I just want to scrape it. You be like, squeeze it. Squeeze it, like, Nuzlis head and not... Yeah, I'm gonna scrape it. You talk about that all the time. Yeah, I was like, I'm not my crush in his head. I have heard with this, people have a reaction to babies. They're like, so cute they want to bite them.

I'm like, what does that mean? You want to bite the baby. Patrick from live action told us that his on. Pat Matt? Pat Matt used to bite his ears. They would nibble on his ears. Who did this? Patrick's aunt.

I thought it was grandmother. grandmother? Grandmother? Oh my baby Patrick. Oh my baby Patrick. Which side? Mother's his father's side. Which side of the head?

Which ear? I don't know. So they would bite his ears. Does that have like some kind of long-term. But it went to like, he was like 10 though. And he was like, good way. No, even older. That's iffy.

Yeah, she's good. You remember the creepy thing when, like 11th? Vladimir Putin, like was like 20. He was on a political stop, and there was a kid there, and he walked over the kid, lifted up the kid's shirt, and kissed him on the stomach, and then walked away. Maybe Blue Rosbury. Anybody, yeah, kind of like that.

I was like, but like, kids love that. I don't do that. It was, it was weirder than that. It was weirder than that. I think maybe they didn't do that to anybody you don't know. Even people you do know. Maybe it's a cultural thing. Maybe do it in like the privacy of your own home

with your own kids or whatever. You know, like a, so do I keep tapping this or do you take it off the Pasco? It's a cultural thing. Yeah. I lost my thing here. I don't know, there's something, I think there's something in human nature that makes you want to know on soft cute things.

Well, does it ever have a view? I'll nibble my cats there sometimes, just be like, if you're dating someone, don't you ever just want to like pinch their cheeks or like bite them? No, but Michael, Michael pinches Lindsay's face all the time. I want to bite Aaron all the time. I bite lips. Yeah.

But you can't go up to someone to bite that lip. That's usually in a moment of passion. Yeah. You can't really be like, hey, I'm talking about cuteness level. So what do you want to bite on him? Aaron's not cute though. Yes he is. But you shouldn't bite people.

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That's a day. Yeah. I need to, I need to invest in that because my meals always consist of when I go home as I cook ground beef and beans. It's always some variation in chili, and it just tears up my butthole. That's why you follow the time. That's why I fart all the...

No, stop. Do it, do it. Don't force one. It's already out. It keeps coming. It never ends. Oh, it was quiet though. I mean, it's bad.

That's because you drink protein shakes. The other day. The other way? Yeah. You never heard that? You do know? I was in a newbie. What are you doing over there, farted?

Good luck over there, Kaffee. I was in a new boat in LA, right? And a driver fired. Oh, I think I ran out of your Twitter. Really awful one. Like, he must have been like, man, I really gasped this whole car. He was probably in the guys. Definitely smelled it.

Didn't crack the window in anything. Like, I know that's admitting to the fart, but it's like, I know he fired, because I didn't. Why didn't you open the window? Because then that's insulting to him. Did you not embarrass him? I don't want to embarrass fart, but it's like, I know he farted, because I didn't. Why didn't you open the window? Because then that's insulting to him. Did you not embarrass him? I didn't want to embarrass him,

but I also didn't want to. So instead you tweeted about it. Well, he does, I didn't post a picture of him and say, this guy fired in my nose. Stand from Los Angeles. But I think the correct thing to do there, he should have just done the windows down for a bit, done him up.

I would have said nothing of it. I don't want to do the windows down, because then he's embarrassed, and I said, didn't want to ask him to. So he should have done the windows down for a bit done them up. I would have said nothing of it I don't want to do the windows down because that needs embarrassed and I said it won't ask him Why you should have done the windows down? You still give him five stars. I did because It wasn't a malicious thought it probably just eaked out of it humanity in progress Yeah, I was just would have appreciated a little off the fresh. You were like I would give this guy four stars But an alien civilization has made come. Do you think aliens fart? I'm sure. I mean, I'd be worried.

I'd be worried about a lot of stuff with aliens. Do you, I guess they have buttles? What if they, what if they need, what if they're like, take the, what do they call the alien an alien? Xenomorph, is that right? Xenomorph? Yeah. It needs another species in order to propagate.

And, because it's like a parasite. It's a parasite. And what if, what if there's nailing species like that And they've run out of fucking species on their planet and they need to have another species that they can They in order to grow as a species they need another species to latch onto we can't imagine what I Can't imagine we haven't even found everything on this planet. I'm sure there's there creatures here without balls Right. I'm sure there's alien life very close to us that we just can't recognize as being like We'll create your stomach but holes here

There's a creature in my but hole. I'm gonna do the jellyfish have a but hole. Oh, it doesn't have a but hole Oh, like some some you know creatures They just absorb food and then shed through the body. I don't have an anus or digestive tract You've ever seen a fish poop. Yeah, it's really entertaining. Mm-hmm. We used to have a goldfish that when it would shit It would always make the really like these long skinny shits. Like little spigates? It wouldn't be like little, I thought they would be like little turd shits. Like you think like, go ahead. But this was always like a long, long, long stringy shit. And we would always know when it was releasing it because it would thrash around in the fish tank. And it got really big. So it would

make a lot of noise and smash the rocks around and then we would see this like long stringy shit floating behind it. It's also like a hey clean the water. Thrash. Yeah. I thought I was swimming with that for ages. I have fish now. Do they shit? I have three fish.

Coil? Yeah, little coy. Coil. Coil's your fucking expensive dude. I got them with the house. So you got three? Yeah there's three of them. One of them is big.

One of them are kind of like they're okay They're okay. What is it? Come on, Bob rocket help me out here. No, it's a but then I went and looked we really get a pond store because I had to replace the filter Hmm fucking faces worth a thousand dollars Sell them you want to buy a new fish? Get rid of them make no like I mean I was taking very good care of him before, but now I'm like, like, check up on it. Hey, man.

Do you have a new, okay, emotional? You like, joke the cat away. No, how are you fish? So is it in a pond? Yeah. Count in front. Did you name him? Like, hey, you're McCoy and you're coil.

What is Joe the Fish? And then the other two, the other two, you don't really have names. Because one is orange and white, so it's just Joe the Fish. Show the fish. I want to have an Aquarium I have a cat I feel like I would have an like an actual I've always wanted to be I've always liked aquariums. I got my dad one once

But I want one this built in the wall to be cool Well, how do you she is that to have a an aquarium that's in the wool? You have a girlfriend. You're fine What do you mean? I think that justifies getting an aquarium in your wall? No, I'm saying it's like you just worried about the douche factor What do you worry about? I'm assuming it make it hard to sell it Oh, they go home with a guy you made the decision. You're gonna go home with the guy you get there He's got a fish tank in the wall. Is that a deal breaker? No, I mean, I just don't I don't want to say anything That's a deal maker. Yeah, you like to show signs of

Responsible I don't I mean, I assume that's like shitty expensive It's probably the cat to be up to jump on it and then open the fish It's not fish or bad. It's in the wall the cat will ignore it. I Planned everything around like what the what is the I want this thing? What is the cat gonna do to this thing? I can't have this thing the cats a fucking nightmare. He's a real I Love him though. What's the name of me? Same thing gollum that didn't see the name of Gollum before he turns that shmigol shmigol

I'm bomb and bomb Shmigol you're better lower the ring trivia of your your at Star Wars. Me is a captain It's okay. I said tens of thousands tens of what? Tens of grams. Oh Brants Still my sensor you know I in Fallout shelter is just goes to show how far behind diamond video games Fallout shelters like the only game I play because I only had to play like two minutes at a time You play it on your computer though. I do. I said your phone. I don't like mobile games

I don't want anything else in my fucking the same mobile device that distracts me. Yeah, it's the same game I don't want it on my mobile device. So I don't want games on my mobile device Why because it's just too easy to get distracted. No, it isn't What do you mean? I mean, I'm not like walking down the street I'm like, I've got to play this. I'm not like stopping work to play my phone game. That stuff's for like traveling and planes And it's like it's nice to have on there. I'm not stopping my work, but it's like it is nice I like to have time when I'm not busy. I'm not mentally occupied and I can just sit there and think Like I've lost that in my life when I was a Teenager and I go to my job in Houston when I worked at counting country mall

I would drive to work 40 minutes to work and then 40 minutes back as Houston's fucking enormous Luxor it didn't you just what's that? You were gonna look at store. I did I worked in the store. So did I I worked at Houston trunk factory Which is now bag and baggage. Oh my god, just sit there for days. I wonder how many days of my life were spent just sitting in a retail store? I always said, you know what,

what would be a really awful version of hell is if you just had to watch your own life as an observer and you had to watch yourself just waste fucking time. And you have to watch yourself do it. I think about that whenever I'm doing something for a long period of time, that's just like, what am I doing this for? You know, it's just like, ugh. What And you have to watch yourself do it. I think about that whenever I'm doing something for a long period of time, that's just like, what am I doing this for? You know, it's just like, ugh.

What do you have? Just like that. I'll go for a play game for like five hours when I binge a game or something like that. But if you had fun the entire time, was it not worth it? No, yeah, it is when I'm playing the game, but I just think about like, what if I had to watch myself do this with this,

but I feel like, I mean, that would be a smart way to live if you actually had to watch your whole life. Yeah, you're not gonna have to do that. No, I know that. Just turn around. It's all like a medical scenario. You don't know this. What do you think aliens are watching your whole life?

You shouldn't redesign your life based on the thing. I don't redesign it. It's just a hypothetical scenario I used to evaluate the value of what I'm doing at that moment. Well, then you think like, oh, I could be going to gym or learning something. Well, even go to the gym would be fucking awful. I would watch that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. you think like, oh, I could be going to gym or learning something. Believe it or the gym would be fucking awful. I would watch that. Yeah, yeah.

But then like, what? Because then I could make a good form, plain. What would you call a final then is not racing time? It just goes to show that moderation is the nice balance to life of doing many things. What do you want to watch yourself do? Skydive. Like that. She's not a good day.

Like all the time? You would skydive. You would skydive. You would skydive. You would skydive. Again, to watch yourself do it. Mate, I don't know. We don't know how the system works. It could be like VR. Or you just watch the one on TV. Like get a heavenly like VR. You get to watch your thing. There's a Albert Brooks movie called what's it? There's a patch around. He might know this one. What's it? Albert Brooks movie.

It's old with a. Where he goes has to, it's called defending your life. You know you have a computer for him. Defending your life, thank you, see? There you go. He has to go and he has to defend his life in court, like why he should be able to go to heaven. Huh, wow. Interesting.

And so they have to show clips from his life and everything like that. And then like, he's like his own lawyer. And so it's an interesting concept. $10 million. Go ahead. But every month, you have to watch every single time you've had sex. Oh, wow.

From beginning to end. Why would you say no to that? Well, it's just like time pause and then you have to... Nope. But then what if you've had sex and it's like, mounts it into like days worth of sex? Yeah. Then you've lost several days of that month.

$10 million dollars would be... $10 million dollars. And the more you have sex, the longer each. So you're just feeling excited to have sex. Unless you want to watch yourself have sex, I wouldn't mind watching myself have sex. What counts as sex? Yeah, I would do it.

I wouldn't want you to self have sex. What counts as sex? When's the clock start? Yeah, true. What about if you masturbate? I would say when the P goes in the V. Okay. Oh, for sure.

Yeah, yeah. Because it's like, you know, like what? Two or 50 minutes. It's good. It's good. Yeah, no, you it's like, you know, like, like, what, two or 15 minutes. Five, it's good. Yeah, no, you know. Why would you want to watch yourself have sex? Because I get $10 million. Yeah, no, I mean, like just in general,

that would you want to see it? Why wouldn't you want to watch yourself have sex? It'd be nice to know. Maybe like good for him, Blake. Yeah, got her. You'll think it looks like a leg. Got her. Got her.

Yeah, we do that, Timberlain. Yeah, why wouldn't you want to, why would you say no to that? Fuck. I just like, get a glance on my own and butthole, something. And I'll be like, do you ever tell me if you told me? Where's the camera? You don't look here. You ever tell me you're going to get a job that you have to do one day a month, maybe two

days a month. And you're going to get to pay Timberlain bucks for the job. I'm like, fuck, I'll do that job. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter really what the job is. Murdering children. Well, obviously, you're already committed. That's my passion. So I don't want to get to spend more money. It might get to the point where that's half of your month. It's going to come back in honor of my action. How much sex do you think people are having? What's your cumulative time, do you think? If you, even if you have sex every day for half an hour,

that's three days. That's not go crazy. 30 days times 30. It could be a while. You need to be watching. So that would be 900 minutes, right? Do you get snacks while you're watching yourself bound? You can do whatever you want.

You just have to watch. What's 900 minutes an hour? I can't do math. 900 minutes is an hour by 60. 60 would be 10, so it would be 15. 15 hours. That's not even a full day. But that's in a solid logic.

Maybe it's not that much. Even if you had sex for an hour every day, that's still 30 hours, it's just a little over a day. You were saying something. But you only have 30 in a month. 30 what? Days? Yeah, so people give up, people give up,

like, people give up 22 days a month for their jobs to make money. You're giving up one day a month to make money, to make 10 days a month. If you get to the point where 28 days of the month, that you're watching yourself bone, you've only got two days a month to live and do life. A lot of sex though.

How much, what are you doing? You like, are you would be watching yourself have sex while you're having sex? That'd be great. How much, what are you doing? You would be watching yourself have sex while you're having sex. That'd be great. How much sex you having? Yeah. You could be your own porn. But you've got from now until the end of your life.

That's a lot of future sex. Wait, is it like every month? It's a lot of future. It's like whatever happened in that month. You watched it and I was start over again. No, you have to watch every time. Oh, it accumulates? Yeah.

I'm not doing that. The way you said it was like a periodical thing. Like, it accumulates? Yeah, I'm not doing that. The way you said it was like a periodical thing, like on February 28th, I gotta watch all my February sex. Yeah, that's not fun. And then in March, I gotta watch all my Marches. February 1st, you gotta watch the first time you had sex to like last night, last night. First time, oh, my whole life, yeah, no way.

No, it's no way I'd do it. There you go. Try, I'm not on the same page. Now, I'm gonna try and cut it, what that would be. Well, I mean, That's the hard part, you know now. Sometimes you can go, but maybe you're, Sometimes you can go for an hour, you well. I mean that's the hard part you know now sometimes you can go It might be you're not I think like a cumulative what's your shortest?

Shortest to think it was when we were in a rush cuz I was trying to get her to an airport I think you're trying you like were you in it? No, we run and light for flight I don't know probably Sub-minute couple couple minutes sub-minute No, we run and let for flight. I don't know, probably... Sub-minute. Couple of minutes. Sub-minute. Depends on when you start counting it, right? I mean, sometimes you go for just like speed.

What about you, Gavin? You've never tried to see how fast you could go from start to finish? How fast you could go? Why would you... Not like with a woman. You never tried to speed run sex? You never tried that? Really?

I mean, I feel like you'd both have to agree on it. Right? Yes, you would. And then, it's not now. Right? No, no, no, no. Or it was like the pressure on it, and then I would probably be a last one.

I want to ask a question to you, because I'm really curious now. What if the guys just really excited? That happens to him? Yeah, that's happened to me before. What was it like? In my first relationship, yeah, there would be times where it's just like, oh, right. Maybe too much full play.

You know, and it's like, guys, just don't worry about it, too. But, Blaine Gavin, imagine this. Imagine you're with a girl, and you're taking her clothes off. I'm imagine that. And she has an orgasm. That would not be disappointing at all, right? She's like, so excited to have sex with you. She has an orgasm before you get her completely naked.

That'd be incredible. Yeah. You tell like everyone you know about that. like so excited to have sex with you, she has an orgasm before you get her completely naked. That'd be incredible. You tell like everyone you know about that. But like if it happens to a guy, it's like the end of the world. Oh. She's, oh, huh. Yeah, that would be good.

Barbara ever had a premature orgasm yourself? Myself? Yeah. Yes. You have? Yeah. Like you're getting ready to have sex and you have an orgasm.

Yes. What? But I mean, there, I mean have sex and you have an orgasm. Yes. What? But I mean, it's not without touch or anything like that. No, I got you. I'm talking like. Yeah. Some guys get so excited that like before anyone, well, you know, they're kissing or whatever,

but before there's actual sexual contact. Like someone's putting a hand on a genital. Before that happens. Yeah. Then, let me wet my genital out when we get going.. How many genitals do you have guys have one genital? No Genital I was referred genitals plural. Yeah, me too, but Why? No balls and one penis. I still be like oh you got me right in the geno. I think if it was one big unit

Well, then it's like an elephant face Like I've a vagina is geno. It's true. Yeah. I don't know why. Right in the gents. I don't think there is such thing as a singular geno. It's like how pants are pants, but it's just one pair. It's true. No, right. It's not pant. Yeah, I don't know. It's a good point. Because it definitely, yeah, it's a good point. What's the worst thing that's happened to you during sex? The worst thing? The worst thing? Just like either awkward or embarrassing or funny or

something that was I told this to her on the podcast before, but I once had like a really bad case of the queues. Yeah, like real bad to the point where like he like pulled out of me and I started laughing and every laugh. It made another like. I mean some positions and I like ran away to the bathroom but my running just increased. Some positions though just that you push air in. Yeah, well it's like I was just saying this is your fault the whole time. Because it was. I didn't create that air by myself.

I drank a coke earlier. Sorry everybody. I can't think of the worst thing to have in a mid-range sex. It sucks because when you say the story, then people listening automatically go into as soon as the person you're currently with. Yeah, that's true. That's true. I would say your playing story is pretty bad. Oh, that's not sex. That's not sex. Wasn't his head. In your head it was. Yeah. I also told the story of a... I got hurt once.

He faced your glow job. Wait, you got fought in the face. Yeah. Who did that? Oh, never mind, Kim. It's a previous relationship. What's that? We sucking him off from behind. No, he was on the couch like you are now. Also, what? OK, you're listening to the audio podcast. Barbara is now demonstrating on Gavin.

Sponsors can see this live. So if you were leaning forward, sitting on a couch like that, and your legs were like kind of up, your butthole would be exposed. What's he doing? What do you do? Do you blow him into lazy boy? I go, I go, I go, I go. I was down the floor, he was in a couch. He's on a couch.

Yeah. What did any, any, any just let one go? Yeah, it wasn't on purpose. I'm sure it wasn't. I remember, it's like, blaine's dream. Uh, mine, it wasn't necessarily the worst thing to have is just a funny story, but, um, I was like Blaine's dream. It wasn't necessarily the worst thing to have, it was just a funny story, but I was house sitting for a friend and I invited my girlfriend over

at the time. Oh, God. And she, she did that for me. And I house sit, everything's fine. It's my friend's family, they get back to their house and then like a couple of days later, he's like, did you have like, so and so over to visit? And I was like, oh yeah, why?

Oh, why? And he's like, oh, nothing, nothing. And I was like, tell me why. And it was because they found stuff. Did they find a stain? They found some spots. Your stain or her stain? Yours.

You're just fired over the kitchen counter. Like, well, how did you see it? No, I mean, I tried some, went on the couch. Yeah, that's so hard to notice. I feel like if I'm house sitting and I make the absurd decision to have some jolly in someone else's house, I'm definitely gonna be looking afterwards.

Potential stains or like trajectories and things? Trichectories. I've done it in some weird places. I had an item moment like that where girl, I was dating, she was like a babysitter. And there was some incident that happened at the house with like a break in. And she said, yeah, and they had footage

of the people on the Nanny cam. And I was like, Nanny cam. They go, yes, it is. Apparently they have like a camera in the house. And I was like, you know we had sex in that living room. Like I, this was like months previous. And I had to point it out to her. But she was like, like, I mean,

you see, John and realization on her face. But wasn't there like someone else's kid in the house? Yeah, but they were asleep. Oh, that's bad. That's bad. Yeah, you're like, I don't know what they want to do. I'm like, area there. You're yeah, you're like I won't it like area there you younger you make stupid decisions, so the sweet sex type someone Just board it up there's a burning burn six takes man I don't know how sweet that sex tape So I gave you ten million dollars would you watch that probably a standard death as well?

I bet it probably wasn't standard death one of my female friends was hooking up with the guy at her house upstairs and had his long stairway and you can hear someone coming up and it was like her new boyfriend. So. Her new boyfriend was coming up? No, her boyfriend and her were hooking up. Okay.

And he was doing things with his hand. He was figuring her. And they heard it. They got him clarified. Yeah. I thought he was painting something they were sticking his fingers in her vagina and like this

so then they hear the audio podcast Blaine is not demonstrating on Gavin yeah what was the first members? maybe, I'm not sure she was anyways does it matter? so they hear footsteps coming up

and it ends up being her dad and they rush and they get all their stuff together and he's like, oh, hey Derek, nice to meet you. I heard a lot about you. Oh, oh, fuck that. Shack hands. Yeah, fine. If everybody's fine. He's like, everybody's fine.

Everybody's fine. That guy, the poor dad just felt his daughter's. You have to say it. You have to say it. You have to say it. You're overthinking it. Everybody's fine. I'm just like...

So when you got lost in the face by air, during, was that off-putting for both pies? Did it part your hair? Did it go... It was like an azuka. No, it was fine. But did it part your hair? Do you go? No, it was fine. Yeah, he was just like oh my god like I am so sorry And then I was like I don't like whatever I went like this I just like Way my hand here crack the wind is dick when you're doing it. Nope. How did you get huh? You might know the beds in You might know the beds in gesture dormitory.

Yeah. Do you know them? I don't know if they've changed over the years, but they're essentially like, their couches, right? With drawers underneath, and then you can pull the bed out to make it a bed. So basically when both the roommates are asleep, they extend their beds,

and it eats up a significant portion of the room, right? And then it's like up against the wall or whatever. I know this, I thought they were connected to the wall. They're not fucking connected to the wall. And so my girlfriend at the time, we got way too far out on the edge of the bed and the whole fucking thing. Oh my God.

What bunk over on the top of us? While we were like still connected. And that's a lot of torque to be puttin' in like, was that the deepest you've ever been? It was fucking crazy. It was fucking crazy. She was really good to board about it. She thought it was awesome.

Did that end the night, or okay, from like a simple. I mean, we had to freak me the fuck out. Have any of you come close to, I don't even say it, because it's gonna make me cringe, but breaking your dick? I don't think so, but I've gotten a bend that's like, you know.

I've got a bend that was really close. Yeah, it was painful. I wanna hear about the stories, I was like, ooh, one of my old friends shacked on a trampoline and hurt. Yeah, that just seems like a bad idea. Cars and get phones. Like one of those double bounces. There are dangerous positions for that.

Have you ever had to stop anybody because they were headed like you to get, you really have no clue what you're doing and you're about to hurt me. Yeah, we had a, yeah. Yeah, Jabbarra, girls with blood jobs are, it could be a very mixed bag. Really?

Yeah. I mean, a lot of the sexual prowess of guys gets really evaluated. Yeah. And, but really it's like, there's a lot of like, I don't think women's around discussing technique or anything. Here's the thing, like I don't know if people realize that women could be really bad at sex. Yes.

I think maybe there's the perception that if they're just lie there, it's not. I don't think anybody wants to talk about it because they're just happy that women are involved. Like they're like, all right, if she shows up, it's good. We'll make it work, you know? But no.

Yeah. You got to be interactive. Yeah, there's definitely been people that I'm not, I'm not, like while I'm having sex with them, I'm like, I'm not coming back to this. Like, I'm not making a return journey. But it's funny, because I always notice things too, like I can't help but notice,

but the blame is talking about its friend, fingering his girlfriend. Yeah, how do you explain it? No, my friend was the girl. Your friend was girl. So the guy fingering the girl. I don't know if that guy was. You made a gesture and I was like interesting like

What was your gesture with fingering? They go right there two fingers. That's really That's that those the two fingers you use Because that's a gesture that you use this. I'm like I'm fast. I'm fascinated by that That's why I asked about the thumb I'm just like, I'm very uncomfortable with you all doing that. Sorry, I'm like, rapidly. I think I told my story about the girl that was in my high school that she got a reputation because she didn't know how to give a hand job and she would go like this.

Yeah, like a snake charmer. And then they call her snake charmer. Oh, that's a snake charmer. Nobody corrected her or talked to her. I mean, the guy was taking it and he was just like, this is a joke. So if you were like, in trying to assault someone and you were like this, which you just not know what,

she went like this when she'd be like, oh my god. Oh my god. Maybe it works for some people. I can't imagine, because then you can't, you can't go down the full way. You just, maybe some guys really love the tip of their penis.

We talk about, though, having to watch all the sex you have in a month or whatever. The rates at which you have sex are totally different when you're in a relationship than when you're single. Like, if you're single, not attached to anybody. Like, you're just completely single. And you're like out and bars. I take like, twice a month or once a month is a pretty good batting average.

A lot depends because also when you're a relationship for a long time, you tend to sleep together less often. You tend to have sex less often. Yeah. You tend to slow down over time. Or as if you're in new relationships over and over. That is the peak, right? It's like when you become exclusive with somebody

that like first month long period is just like. Even like the, just block a calendar of all, basically. Or if you're in a long distance relationship with someone. Yeah, that's different, but then your frequency drops. Yeah. You make up for it and definitely in benches,

but yeah. We'll come with a limp. It's when you're in a long distance relationship, you do have to be like, hey, we should probably do something else. Yeah. I would do something. Why would you do that?

And then you don't. It's like literally just getting together to, because you have all the other relationship stuff, like the conversations and everything. You have the rest of the time. And you don't have that on those in person times. It's physical. Yeah.

That's why you get Xbox or PlayStation and you play online games with them. It's like little digital dates. It is awesome. How many people are into video games these days? Yeah, it's a different world. It is. By the way, I just got an Xbox and you've asked if I played Xbox before.

What's a place? I'm talking about bro. You want to do it? Yeah, for sure. You want to have a long discussion with me? What do you play? What do you want to play? Rainbow Six? Man, I'll get what I'm I'm mad. You play Madden? Bro?

Rain Bros. No, but I know But uh, you should tell you you should just play dude who plays Madden call a duty. You should just go for that full I don't want to I'm more than that That's who I am. It's true It was embarrassing because like there's this really nice guy named rad that came up to me at just kick factor Rad as soon as rad rad out my waiter today at the restaurant the Mexican restaurant went to his name was I gotta say it was straight face he goes okay if y'all need anything else just give me call my name is loaf And he left and I'm gonna met a guy say his name was loaf

No, I go, no, he said love this little brother role but when the check came it's a server John so John name job love did he come back over and he's like are you guys ready to order haha haha haha

haha that was like it's so good I'm always so impressed by your shite jokes. Yeah. They come so fast. Anyways, he came up to me. So yeah. He was super sweet, very nice.

And he came up to me and was like, oh, hey, my friends. Text to me one and tell you, hey, and stuff like that. Jonathan says, swipe right. And it's like in front of my family. And I'm like, this is the first time my parent parents in my sister had seen me interact with a community member before. And they're I'm like, this is the first time my parent parents in my sister had seen me interact with like a community member before. And they're like, ooh, this is sort of perplexing.

Yeah, people in your life get really freaked out by that. Have you noticed that? Yeah. My sister was like laughing her ass off. She thought it was the stupidest thing in the world. A lot of people hate it. A lot of my old friends hate it. That you're famous?

No, just that. So if I go back to where I'm from and tame and I'll see my old friends and we'll, I don't go to a pub, maybe the guy behind the barn, or so I am. And they were like, oh, it's embarrassing. Why would that guy freak out about you like that? Is that an English thing though, maybe? I don't know. My colleagues' buddies get freaked out by it. Like they never don't get freaked out by it. Like we went to a movie together with, you guys know Ross? My buddy Ross?

I don't think so. I never really talked about my college friends that hang out with brothers out there with Ross and the guy behind the counter We got like our popcorn and all that stuff and everything and the end of it guy goes hey Bernie's one let you know big fan And Ross was like what Dude Oh that kind of freak out stopped everybody dead is like what's your chain again? Jadigan Come on dude my guys excited for you. Yeah, he's very excited

You know the site yeah my friends think it's like the coolest thing ever And I was like, Ross, come on dude. My guy's excited for you. Yeah, he's very excited. And I'm just like, whoa. Yeah, my friends think it's like the coolest thing ever. Yeah. Like all they want to talk about, they're just like, people know who you are. Like, let's go walk down the street and see if anyone recognizes you. Yeah.

That's not gonna work. I had a proud moment at the Rock Gym. I was with Drew, who's my 80s. Really good guy. And he's an okay guy. I love Drew. He's awesome. He's an okay guy.

We had a realization that we- That's like give everybody like, he's a really cool guy I love you. He's awesome. He's awesome. He's an okay guy. We had a realization that it's like give everybody like He's a really cool guy like stamp like right away with the realization that we went to it It's my best friends and we were like kind of disappointed about it We're like, oh, I guess we're yeah, you can sit on my couch if you've ever been in this car Yeah, it's trash mugs. It's fucking gross. He doesn't have to go cups He has actual full like house mugs all over his car. Hipster in the world. He was great. We're going climbing and then a guy comes up and we go like, hey, Blaine, you know, started talking to me about Rister teeth. And

then I walk away and say, yeah, this you later and then he's like, do you know that guy? You friends with him and I was like, oh, no, he's like a community member. He's like, no, no, no, no, you handle that very well. So that was a very big compliment. Very nice. Yeah. Then I have one friend who I don't see very often, who we're at a bar drinking, somebody comes up and goes, hey Bernie, big fan of Richie, can you take a photo? I'm like, sure, man, let's take a photo.

Take a photo who walks away, but he goes, you put him up to that. No, I think he goes, you knew that guy was gonna be here. I'm like, how would I, what do you think? What do you think, I like, reach down to somebody and like, pay them an actor to come and take a photo with me? It's weird as to the people who you knew before. Yeah, yeah.

You know, I never got to really honestly, I never got to experience that with, maybe a little bit with my dad, but not so much with my mom, you know, because she didn't know me. She passed away before. Had anything that was any kind of notoriety. So, is interesting.

I was wondering, the big thing is, I wonder if my mom, when we showed red versus blue at the Lincoln Center, and that would have been a huge fucking deal to her. Because she's like a New York Chicago person. She grew up in Chicago and then moved to New York. So that would have like, that had been a big fucking deal to her. My parents, they love it. Like, my dad's a high school teacher, my mom's grade school teacher, and then they have like Ruby fans and stuff like that.

And my kids would go to my dad They're like I don't know. I was playing a some from Rishy shout out to me keening high school My dad fucking loves it like he tells me every time it happens So I'm gonna be able to see what happens. I don't think anyone should have a Phil skat about No people should know like I was here later We talked about this for I hear later on social media Oh, I saw you somewhere, but I didn't want a bother you know You didn't want to bother you. You said come up and say hi. And it's actually believe or not,

I would rather, if someone knows who I am, which is not common. I mean, it's for me, it's like, Gavin, you probably get the most. I get it like on average, I get recognized once or twice a week. Yeah. But almost every time I'm with Gavin, we get stopped.

And I would prefer if someone where I am knows me, and I don't have an anonymity, I would actually prefer to know that. Like, because then if I hear later that they said, oh, I saw you at the coffee shop, and I didn't wanna say hi, because you seemed like you were busy, I'm like, oh shit, what did I say when I was at the coffee shop?

You know what I mean? It's like, I start to second guess myself. And I also wanna say hi to people too, you know what I mean? So I get to sec shop, Ruben's seeing you there there have a good day yeah I mean it's like when you go to the doctor now or you know the pharmacist or anything else it's like you just like you got to kind of accept the fact that there's a possibility some of their might know who you are you know yeah with a bank

that's another one the only time I would't want to say lies in the bathroom. What's that? Like, if I'm in the bathroom, I see the only time I think I would. Yeah, I'd say that so real is that, my penis is out and in my hand, just wait until I put it away. You know, it's always one of those things too, because we're kind of a lot of sets, you end up in bathrooms at the same time as other people.

Let me wash my hand, right? There's just a certain, like, 50% of guys are totally fine talking to you while you're taking a piss next to them. Are you one of those guys? No, but I'm one of those guys that doesn't care. Like I won't talk to anybody, but if somebody's talking to me, I'll talk back and I don't give a shit.

But I would never start a conversation with somebody else while we're at a urinal. I mean, exactly that. Okay. What about you? Yeah. I mean, I'm different. I'm not being uptight about it.

I know. I see your dicks in your hands. So, mine close up. Yeah, it's like I don't get pissy stage fright. Right, if someone's talking to me, I can still pee. I'm gonna call you guys. I've been wondering forever because I never asked any about this, anybody about this.

Do you guys go to a hair salon or get your hair cut by an actual person at a hairdresser? I get a barber. When? The family's barber shop up on a brunette. When someone's washing your hair, like your head's tilted back in the sink, it's someone's washing your hair. Is it okay to close your eyes? Oh, I know what you're talking about

There's something else to where I wondered if it's okay to close your eyes. I forget what it is But it's something similar so yeah if they're washing your head and you close your eyes You feel like that's too intimate. I feel like it's too intimate and they might like be weirded out by that like that You're closing your eyes. I think so either the mean, the excuse is also they have like the spray that it could get in your eyes. You know, that's what keeping close. Oh. Okay.

Like here's the other thing I remember what it was. Is I was on the set and I, somebody was doing my makeup for I was in the scene and there was like some serious like I can't really go into why, but there was like some special effects makeup. And so I spent some time in the chair. And when they were, when they were like had their hands on my face, I would just shut my eyes. And then eyes and I thought oh it's appropriate to be shutting my eyes

I think that's fine. There are a lot of people on movies who have had you know serious prosthetics and heavy makeup where it takes three or four hours And a lot of people fall asleep. Yeah, and it's like totally fine with it. I think it's easier for them to be aware of that. No, but I know what you're saying. It's like it's more an intimate thing like if someone's like washing your hair and you closing your eyes It seems like you're focusing on it or trying to enjoy it.

Just like you're enjoying it too much, almost maybe. Yeah. And it's funny because the hairdresser I go to, it's like a really nice salon, and they give you like a whole like, scalp and neck massage as well. Yeah.

And I always want to close my eyes, but I'm like, is this going to be weird? I think it's creepy. I think it's creepy if you leave your eyes open. Well, I don't think it's the opposite. It's like, I'm not staring at them. I'm just kind of like looking like this. That's good if you leave your eyes open. I'm not staring at them, I'm just kind of like looking like this. Just shut your eyes.

I got a Floyd 99, they also give you this vibrator hand massage thing, and I just... Yeah, it's super nice. Sometimes I'm just like, I'm sorry I've had a long day, but it closed my eyes. As long as you don't groan or fall asleep and groan, I think it's a big deal. I think it's a big thing if I groaned a big deal. I think it's a big deal. Did you really? I was like, oh. I think that's okay.

I'm not going to like, oh. My favorite dude, my favorite story of that story told about the guy who discovered how much he was into his prostate. When his doctor stuck his figure up his butt and he said he meltdown. He's grown explosively. Didn't he say something about like becoming like a wood pole

on the day? I'm like control. One of the best stories ever on the internet. He's just absolutely a fucking joy. I love that thing. You got to raise some there? Yeah, you want me to read this? So Blaine, you had a great segue for me. Whether you're wearing a suit or sweats,

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I'm gonna love them. I love you. Did you buy them? I think Gus diverts all the small stuff. Sample stuff for this, they usually send some female pairs as well. There's not a lot of... I feel like I don't get any free stuff from this podcast. We don't get any of it.

I'm not the show runner of any podcast, but I'm on a lot of them. But I just watch, the mattresses here, underwear here, my trips. I think I had to get a patched up in the office for a month or capacity. I've opened the office for like a month and a half. I always cast for a match. I want to start a podcast. It'll be one episode long. Okay. And it will have all the sponsors.

And then we'll just shut it down. That's a good idea. And you'll get everything. By the time this podcast comes out, always open with a premiere already. Yeah. Hey, how did it go? Mine is so good.

Did you actually shoot it? We actually already recorded it. Oh, okay. Who was on it? Myself, Lindsay, Mecha and Mariel. That's a, it's a fancy looking show. Fancy looking set. Much of fancy ladies. Mario figured out the blade hates the gaze. Because he wouldn't even take it. That's not true. Don't take the podcast. Don't say things like that out of context because then the people think I hate the gaze.

It's the context of the podcast. I'll make sure not to put you on the podcast with Patrick or I don't hate the gays. I like the gays. Stop talking. You know, it is kind of a thing though around this company, especially with an online audience is, you know, they like meme humor. A lot of people, there's a big portion of the audience that likes repeated jokes. So they'll fucking latch onto something sometimes.

And you're just like, I don't want that to be part of my thing. And just like, please don't, please don't. But then you have other people on the fucking podcast who are just like, that, that, that, that, that. What, two even, if we shouldn't even say like what? I mean, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, and puns. Oh yeah. And it's like, yeah, I like puns. There are a lot of people like puns. And it's just like a form of comedy

that you like throw in every now and then. But the drawing Dix thing, it's like, I did that as a joke a long time ago. And it's become kind of my thing. I can't remember the last time that I even came up. They actually asked me to draw a dick on this note that I left in the most recent double gold box. No shit.

Yeah, so there's a dick on that. And you send it out with a dick on it? It's a dick with people riding on it looking happy and it says magic school bulge. Okay, so it's a dick drawing and a pun. Okay, okay. Almost something that's a, kids. Ha ha ha.

Well, you know, I think it's a big deal. You know, it's double gold sponsor got that. I don't know got a lot of really young kids would become double gold members Are you really concerned about that because you have a bunch of younger people to watch a cheetah hunter? You guys have the bluest material in the company I've said the cleanest Yeah, but you're in the room when people are talking about whatever you do You could be in the room when someone gets mud. It doesn't mean you kill them. Kevin has a of principles. He doesn't say a certain curse words and if he doesn't want to take up a shirt You know fucking do it. I'm like okay. I get that. That's cool. What do you mean?

What I just watched the nudity Million-dollar spot I've had my shirt off several times a million dollars, but there's the other day You're like I don't know. Yeah, it's cool. I just want to keep it comfortable. It was just like the scenario I've got a boy the girl who wasn't Meg, and you know, I totally got that. That's why I wanted to like, it's funny. So I'll keep the show on with this. Oh really?

Well, because in the other one, we didn't see the girl in the bed, did we? Nope. And that was like, who was it? Wait, hold on a second. So you would not, for a scene, you would not get into bed with a girl that wasn't Meg? It depends what it is, right?

Like, do I have to have, if it changes the whole vibe of the thing, if I show it was off, You would not get into bed with a girl that wasn't Meg? It depends what it is, right? Like, do I have to have my- if it changes the whole vibe of the thing if I show it was off I was like, yeah, I guess I'll take it off, but it's like if I can keep it on that's ideal. Well, let me show you this. Now that you're dating Meg, would you do the scene where you made out with Sam Ireland? Yeah, I'm sure you'd be okay with it. Okay. I probably run it by a Give her a little heads up. Yeah, okay Did Aaron react at all to your make out with Chris your make out? Actually, yeah, no kidding

Well, when we filmed that scene Brad who wrote that short really wanted us to actually make out of kissing stuff and he kept him like it'll be funny And just you know, I'm still a little kiss and I was like, I don't know like I would do it I guess just because it's for the short but I guess Aaron talked to them about it and he was just like yeah this is a little odd Chris is my best friend I was my girlfriend really and also I think it's also did you do it we like fake makeup he like his is my neck and stuff too and like I have a big hat so it kind of blocks it but I think the thing is is that people from our community know us as us Mm-hmm, and a lot of the comments were just like this is making me uncomfortable

Uh, wire barber and Chris making out Doing you think errands man. It's definitely a lot easier when you're single to say yes to that stuff Yeah, it's easier when you're single and it's easier when the audience watching it doesn't know you and your personal life Yeah, oh, you can't separate it. You would do that, right? Oh, yeah, I can say good stuff. Sure. I just say good stuff.

For something, it was a test video for something. Yeah, I mean, for me, it's just entirely for the other person. My decision's based on the other person. Yeah, I would have your exact strategy. I would definitely run it by actually. She'd be like, eh. Yeah, I'm sure she'd be like, eh. Would you be able to make doing it? Yeah, I guess so.

I think I don't think Aaron like didn't want me to do it in the way that like he would feel jealous or anything. I think he saw that I was uncomfortable by it. And so maybe he was using his uncomfortability as an excuse for me. I'm comfortable. I just don't think he wanted anything else in common with Chris. He didn't want to like a new thing. Yeah, Chris and I are asking my buddies. Dude, I'm not proud of that. I just don't think he wanted anything else in common with Chris. He didn't want to like a new thing. Yeah. Chris and I are Eskimo buddies. Dude, I'm not proud of that.

Huh? Chris and I are Eskimo buddies. That's true. Is that the phrase for that? Is Eskimo buddies? Eskimo buddies. What does that mean? We've been with, we've made love to the same woman. Who at first?

Blaine. I'm not gonna get Chris's sloppy side. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Why did you refer to yourself in a third person? He's been doing that more deliberately, by the way. You made him refer to yourself in the third person. No, I just wanted to do that. So you had sex with your old name,

Chris had sex with her? Like, Like, same night? Did you write a message? Yeah, he was like, it was like, last couple weeks, a few weeks,

a few weeks apart. Yeah. Who was this? I'm not gonna say that. You don't, okay. It's not that was it like a girlfriend or like some, oh no, we were just kind of talking, hanging stuff and didn't really work out.

And then Chris was like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, bullseys, follow that up. It was okay, and we talked about it. And it was like, yes. That's what I mean, I said to do talk. It's not like we're like passing this thing between us. It's a girl who makes her or a woman that makes her own decisions. And it's like, if she wants to do that, then that's... No, I'm more secure of like, does anyone loop back with the lady later ago? Like, who was better in the sack?

I just don't ever want that with Dan. Do you have you had that with Dan? No. That you know of. That I know of. I would not want to be after Dan. What? That boy. He's a military.

He's a sailor. He's a sailor. Um, I don't know. Dan's good dude, but. He's a really cool bitch. I love him that much. I'm okay going after anybody. Hey, I don't know. Dan's good dude, but I love that much. I love that much. I'm okay going after anybody. Hey, I don't give a shit either. I'm like Rosie O'Donnell.

Yeah, I mean, yeah, you can't you don't think you get top Rosie O'Donnell. It's not a top. I just need that as an intern. I'm not such an old one to throw out. What? Rosie, I think he was thinking of like sloppy seconds type thing. Yeah, I'm thinking of like who could I top? Oh, yeah, like for you to find out girl you're dating. I don't know what his relationship status is But the last guy she was dating is John Cena, right? Are you are you like I'm not I'm not going after John Cena? I can't hang with that. No, I have you okay. I would play the song during. Dun dun dun.

She just starts yelling that during orgasm. John Cena! That'd be fun to be a quaint little thing that would be. That's one of the nice things. That's what we're all directed for make a wish appearances. John Cena, so wonderful human being. Oh yeah, for sure. What are what kind of wishes? He's donea-wish appearances than any other person.

Pewdiepie gets more than David Beckham. You guys? That's what he told me. I like Pewdiepie. I've started watching Pewdiepie's vlog. I really like what he's doing now. I was never keen on his game stuff. Yeah, but, you know, his sensible stuff's pretty good.

I like his vlogs when he gets mad when people come at him. Like, variety magazine for not disclosing ads. And he's like, the fuck yourself. Oh, geez. He doesn't give a shit. He's not, he's not. His video about trying to get the diamond play button was really funny.

Yeah. He was like, the gold play button, give me, give me 46 of these. And then, you know, remember the subscriber purge that pushed Funhouse under a million? Uh huh. They lost like, I think like 30,000 to 20,000 people. How many?

And he lose. 660,000 people. Oh, I'm sure. I've made that back in the day. But he still has a crazy amount of crazy. But it's so crazy. I mean, that's like a really good channel. You know, if you had a channel and I got up to like,

I think, I think, LAN and laser beam is up to, he's about up to like 600,000, right? Is he somewhere in that neighborhood? Last time I chose a zero amount. Yeah, I imagine like losing all of that. He's like, he'd keep by lost that in a day. He made a really funny video about it.

So I'm a fan of PewDiePie. Yeah. Felix. What's a like an actor or somebody that you would love to work with that you have had not had the opportunity to get? Oh, there's kind of javais. Rikijubais, yeah. Do you think he's nice. Definitely. I don't know

I really was here when you guys met Lately Island. I love those guys. They were really cool. I was in town when they they came by. They're really cool. I really liked me in Charl-Toe Coatley. I liked Yorma a lot. I also like meeting Charl-Toe Coatley. That was a fun experience. He and I had a very interesting interaction. He was like,, you're my girlfriend now. Come here, love. Are you going to be talking to me like an American? You know, blah, blah, blah, blah in my head. I was like, what?

They were shot out of a candle. He blasted in there. But then on the little podcast, but he was mega chill. Yeah. He was just in character. I don't know what I was doing. I wasn't there for the shoot and I wasn't there for the podcast. And you were the one who was the first person I was so excited about that guy.

Because you saw him and he saw him and he'll blow him camp for a district nine thing. Yep. Yeah, he was so great and just recognized. Yeah. Not so great in Elysium. And so great in hardcore Henry. Yeah.

You know, to be right to him in the he was he was probably perfectly fine in Elysium. Just Elysium was not a great. Yeah. He was the best part of the 18 movie Matt Damon Matt Damon dude is a pretty good track record like there's not many bad Matt Damon movies What's that Farley brothers movie? Oh, yeah, yeah stuck on you Where's with the great canier one? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm gonna be a time I got green here fired What go on do I ever tell you this story? No, I think you've told I'm not sure if it's gonna be a segue to an ad read

Oh, so as a college I was a college in my idiot buddy. Dahl Who's your friends with what's him last name rod? Dow he he had a job where he worked for the state capital because in Austin the state capital here and where he worked for the state capital, because in Austin, the state capital's here. And he worked at a phone center where they would call and they would do surveys, agricultural surveys to be put

where the land in Texas. And he asked them a bunch of questions. How many to land do you have? Do you have any livestock? How many cows do you have? And so I don't know why, I thought it was funny. I started talking to Dalin. I said that Dal's job was to count cows for the government.

And that's what his job was. That he would go out to count cows for the government and that's what his job was. That he would go out and count cows for the government. It became his long-running joke. I was up late studying for chemistry tests in college and it was like four in the morning, going into five in the morning, then the morning radio show comes on. Like when they start in the morning, those guys have ungodly hours. They work from like six in the morning till nine. And they were saying they had this contest for the worst job in Austin

I was like, oh, it's fucking funny. I'll call the radio station. I'll do my dial impression Call the radio station is Bob and Mike at the time and I called them they got out on the air and they said we got Dal Latch, all right, maybe she's gonna tell my son. We got Dal on the air. Dal, what do you do for a living? I said I count cows for the government And he goes he goes you're you're kidding me. I'm like no, no, I got there dial on the air. Dall, what do you do for a living? I said, I count cows from the government. And he goes, he goes, you're kidding me. I'm like, no, no, I got there and I count all the cows. And they estimate those questions like what happens.

And I'm like, I made a joke like yeah, every hamburger I eat is one less cow, I have to count. And all this, and then, so I go take my chemistry test. And I take, I had a jam box and I recorded on an audio cassette. This thing, and I was gonna play it for everybody at dinner that I played this joke where I got down on the radio. Go to take the chemistry test, come home, go to sleep. I wake up like just in time for dinner because I just crash from doing it all night, you're studying.

I walk down to the dining room and on the bulletin board on the second floor is a note and it says, Dow, call the radio station, you won that contest. And then a question mark, a big question mark next to that. I was like, the fuck, okay. So Dal won Worse Job in Austin contest. I don't know if it's a said Worse Job, right? Not that's what I'm talking about. Worse Job in Austin contest.

And I was like, holy shit, I go, what's one of those surprises associated with this? Well, it turns out it was part of a nationwide thing where they were trying to find the worst job in America. Okay, and so I played the tape for everybody, everybody laughed, you know, a dinner. Then we get a call a week later, Dallas won the top five finalists in the nation.

And he's gonna be on the show called Best of the Worst. So far. It was a show on Fox, okay? And Dallas, like, and then Dall started to panic because Dall was like, oh, I'm gonna lose my job because if you're gonna give it some mad because it's like I work for the government, they're mad and I was like, I just don't even tell them

normal know about it or whatever. And I said just tell the people who make the TV show, tell them that. And so he said, hey, my buddy called in, he's the one who made the phone call, I don't like, they were gonna come tape like his package. And he said, I don't go out in the field. Why didn't you just beat that?

They're like, don't worry about it. They're like, don't worry about it. We'll take care of everything. We'll get a field, we'll get the cows, they gave him a bowl whip, and a hat, you know? And they put down, a dowel's really interesting. He's like Jeremy. He was a wrestler in high school,

but he's like one of these guys who's as wide as he is tall. Like he was like, you know, he's like, he's under six feet, but he's like one of these guys who's as wide as he is tall Like he was like I think you know, he's like just he's under six feet But he's like just like super broad shoulder. So it looks really funny to begin with like in the cowboy hat in the bullwhip And they had him out there like Chase and after Cal if counting them on all this stuff They show the packages on the the prime time show. He fucking wins the contest. Jesus How do you win without like any sort of research happening? He wins the contest, he wins the national contest. They're going to fly him out to LA. They do. They fly him out to LA. They have them on stage except a big check. This is like the end of their season. They have a cow out on stage with him and everything. He wins.

He wins a trip to Seattle, which at the time was a funny joke about a lousy trip because he won the best of the worst trip. He got a trip to Seattle, like a $8,000 prize and then he got money for appearing on the show. And the worst part was, go into the slider, he didn't have to do anything. Like I set the whole thing up. He got to go fly out to LA and be on the show and he said I get to bring a guess and I go, oh, that's really cool. He goes, I'm going to bring Rob, my brother, his brother.

I'm like, okay, fucking dick. So they all flew out. Rob got really drunk, threw up in the studio trash can. They tossed him out or something like that. He got thrown out of the studio audience. And they come back, Dallas won. It's literally they showed the first episode. I think it was a Friday night show. They showed the episodes. They're in the week interim. He had gone out and filmed the show. He's back on Wednesday. the show's gonna air on Friday, he gets a call, he talks to one person, he talks to John Kelsow from the Austin American Statesman, who's the guy who does the stories,

unlike the back page of the front section of the paper, it's all like feel good stories, like, oh, it's a down home, look at this guy, he's been, you know, run this orchard for 80 years, you know, like, call that shit. So he calls and he's like, hey, it's a down home. Look at this guy. He's been, you know, run this orchard for 80 years. You know, like, call a shit. So he calls and he's like, hey, I heard that this, you teaked it on this national contest on Fox. And Dow goes, that's the funny part.

I don't even do that job. It's all a big joke. My friend, like, set it up and everything. John goes with his head. John goes with his head. Thanks very much. Like, hangs up, picks a phone, calls Fox, and goes, hey, you know this kid

that one has a God test, it's all big hooks, right? They were like, what? They fucking canceled the show. They canceled the show. They took the episode that was gonna air all a Dallas footage. They took it off the air, and they just kind of put up a placeholder thing where a lady who, I think, picked ticks off of a duck for research.

Day one and the show was canceled and it never returned because that was a big contest and the whole thing fell apart. Oh my god. Fast forward three years later, sometime later we're watching Jack Nicholson and Greg Keneer in what's that movie that they're in. What if this is the, you know the Helen Hunt Jack Nicholson movie, the psychiatric one. I'm running the story by like pausing on this.

That's good as it gets, right? We're watching that right here. He was down here from Oscar for it. So we're sitting there watching it, down watching it to the room where we're watching it. And he goes, that's the guy. And I go, what? He goes, that's the guy.

And I go, what guy? He goes, that guy, he's the host of the show that got canceled because of me. And I go, Greg Keneer. Then he goes, yeah, we went back and looked at tapes. Sure enough, it was fucking Greg Keneer. And he got fired from that show. And then he went on to make talk soup. And then he became the huge star that he is. So if I ever meet Greg Keneer, I'm going to tell him, I think I played an important part of my life. You can say, you're welcome when you meet me. Me and my buddy, Dal and I in college. You can really affect the entire world with the dumbest stuff.

Like anyone can. Butterfly effect. Yeah, it's so cool. That is quite a domino effect that that thing has. Isn't that fucking weird? And it's like, it really was like three years later. I hadn't thought about it or anything like that. And Dal just walks in like, oh, that's him.

That's the guy. And I go, you never mentioned this before, like, you never said like, he's like, we all would watch him on Tauk Supe all the time. I thought it was kind of a weird coincidence. I think I'm excited. So fuck the wrong with you. This guy sounds like an idiot,

but like, really funny. I'm playing it up. Yeah, he's totally fun decent guy. He's just, he was like, Austin, Born and Bread, and he's just like, his, and his brother was like, a really fun decent guy. He's just, he was like Austin, Born and Bread, and he's just like, and his brother was like a really good friend of mine. Like, like shepherd me, Rob, in my early years at the school, he was like a big influence on him.

Do you have a same? Do you have a show up to your house? No, so my group of friends, it's weird. I have a group of friends in college, it's a big group of friends, we all live together. Your co-op was probably like that. Yeah. And there's certain groups of friends that hang out together

and certain ones that don't. Like they actually actively don't like each other, which is unfortunate, but I see Dalf from time to time like tailgates and stuff like that. I severed ties with my co-op. But it would be cool to see him like on my doorstep like if I could see through my doorbell. Yeah.

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This is like the one thing that I haven't done. I have not done the doorbell. And it's like on my Amazon wish list this. So I'm gonna see if I can, if they'll give us a free sample, I was like, snake it from Gus. Do you have a video doorbell? Okay, yes.

You do. I have a ring. Do you have a ring? I do. Fan of the product. I am. It means that... What's wrong?

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I am now totally gonna buy one of those because if it's convincing people that you're there, what in fact you are not. Because someone can ring the doorbell and you can answer from Tokyo. I answered from Australia. Did you really? Yeah, I was like, can you just leave around the back?

They were just delivering something. Dude, I would love that. I have a package coming that I know it's signature required and I just know, I mean, they can leave it. You know, if you talk to the guy and you're like, hey, just come on, stick him in the zone. He's like, okay, he'll do it, you know? But if you're not there, they're just like knock once

and like, oh, see you in a week, you know? And there's my package gone. You can also set, like motion areas for, like if your doorbell can see the entire street, you can set it so it doesn't pick up, you know, cars and the background stuff. I saw the proxies. Oh, so the doorbell works like not

from when somebody pushes the button? No, it's motion sensitive. No shit. And it's a, you know, it's got infrared camera on it. So it's cool. So it's like looking in your window or something. But $150 off it, off the ring of security kit, which has it,150 off it. After Ring of Security Kit, which has that, is that like several?

Yeah, that has that and it has the additional high definition camera to the, I can't do the same. Because the ring itself is like, that'd be like half price. I know when I read that too, I was like, what? But the camera's gotta be a little chunk of change.

The best thing about Ring though is YouTube. And you see all the terrible delivery guys who just like, yeah, packages all recorded by Ring camera. I don't give a shit, those guys work hard. Why me and don't love other people stuff, though. No, no, no, it could take it.

So when delivered in my Xbox One the other day, if they did that, it would just be. Let me tell you something. They're packaged. Talk about watching your life, picture-friendly as an observer. Yeah, yeah. How much of my life I want to know would be spent popping those little airbags that come now

in Amazon packages? You get a lot of packages. Dude, I get a lot, I'm... More in Amazon packages? You get a lot of packages. Dude, I get a lot. More than anybody else. I get a lot of Amazon packages. Like, that's the number one way I shop. I just like, I'm very patient. So, if I want something, I don't run out the target

and get it, I just go to Amazon and order it and then two days later it shows up. I'm fine. Do you use a credit card that gives you like Amazon points? No, I use Kymiles. Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch. I guess. What's Amazon points?

There's an Amazon credit card. So is it like you get money back? Yeah, you get points. And you're looking into this. Do you do that? Yeah, that's what the credit has. What's the bun spent to the Bunts received? I don't know.

I'm not actually sure. I do the milestone. But like I just checked recently and I have like some points saved up that I could just use on. Oh, you're going to save play. Oh, top of reddit creepy our creepy was a Still from someone's ring app and it was a ring the ring It was someone in a mask and they came in it like and he they listed off their their notifications It was like 3 a.m. 4 a.m

This person just got kept coming and they had like the screenshot of this person was really weird That's a friend probably He didn't the guy didn't say that it was though. He was like, I don't know who, well the thing was it was like, it was a white woman face mask that had boobs and stuff like that, but it was like a black dude wearing it.

So it was just looked like a floating head. It was really strange. Yeah, it messed up. Really creepy. I was just a cast and something and one of the other cast members lead in Really creepy. I was just casting something in one of the other cast members lead and the thing that I was in. She's one of the people from, she was in the purge. One of the purge movies.

And I was like, oh, that'd be fucking great. I'd be so much fun to make one of those movies. Yeah. I'm so bad with horror films. Yeah. You seem like you're like, you'd be a great like horror on Genu as well. Oh.

You're scream in the million dollars, but the Ninja one, I fucking love that. Okay that when you bust that sort out Yeah, playing yang and Ruby was really helped with my I was thinking that when I saw it your best Scream was in the moral combat when we rip off the Yeah, oh Josh's take those Josh's takes the uh There's two really good moments in that in that Ladies million dollar bites when bar busts out the katana. And then the, whatever the moment is when the ninja,

like the trainer turns into the ninja for Lindsay, and she makes that face, it's so fucking funny. I've seen that probably a hundred times, and I've left every time. It's a great facial expression. It's really fucking funny. What was your best scream on camera? My mind is like whenever I get to go over the top angry,

I just did something for red versus blue. I got to go over the top angry. Dude, when you were yelling into that closet for that short where I'm cloned, right? Yeah, so much spit coming out. You're like shaking and spitting. And then after we cut, you'd be like, there was a thing where I didn't really,

because you talked to me about that before, this same thing that I was on, I was on a set where I had a really intense scene with a lot of screaming and stuff like that. It's a horror thing, I won't go any deeper than that. So there's a really intense thing, and they cut and then they moved me off the set and they were gonna shoot just something else.

They didn't need me. So I was like wandering back and forth in the set, and there was a guy, there's like a, he's like a 60 year old actor. He's been around forever, he's like acting the ability thing. He's recognized as a guy if you saw him, but in one of those feelings, he's like a 60 year old actor. He's been around forever, he's like acting the ability, he's recognized as a guy if you saw him, but in one of those fields,

it's like you definitely know him when you see him. And he walks up to me and he starts like shadowing me, pacing back and forth. And then he puts his hand on my shoulder and he stops me and he like, he goes, he goes, he goes, give me hand. And I hit him and I was like, just shook his hand. And he goes, and he literally just goes,

just bring me back, bring me back to earth. Bring me back to earth. I was like, I didn't realize like how tense I was until he started doing that. It was like really, it was really fucking cool. It was like this like, he had like this like, jet eye moment. And he's like totally fucking chilled me out. I'm coming down. Chill, you'll be.

You then just like, I didn't explain. I don't need you. Don't touch me. That's a really cool moment. So like you weren't weirded out by it or anything like that. It was like a very personal. Not at all. Artists don't touch me. That's a really cool moment. So you weren't weirded out by it or anything like that. It was like a very personal. No, not at all. Artists don't weird me out.

Actors are just generally very ephemeral kind of people. We had spent most of the day with a bunch of actors. I don't often get to be exclusively an actor. I'd be careful because one time he said the word, I don't get to be often just an actor. He was like, oh that's insulting just an actor. I'm like, no, I don't get to be often just to be just an actor. And he'll be like, oh, that's insulting, just an actor. I'm like, no, I mean, I don't have to do like, producing and editing and all that other stuff. And it's so it's like, interesting

that people who act for living in that solely what they do, it's like their approach to everything is like, really different. They definitely think differently than other people, you know? But I got to respect for, you know, people do it full time, people do it at a really high level because like that Christian bail thing when he went fucking a shit on that guy,

it's like he had a scene where he had to like react to his friend dying and he had to like be super emotional. And as an actor, it's like, they set up cameras for fucking three hours, they fiddle with the lights for fucking ever, and then when it's time for the actor to do the job, they're like, all right, go. And he probably felt like, 10 seconds to like, get into character, and you have 30 seconds to get it right. And then we it's time for the actor to do the job, they're like, all right, go. And he probably felt like, 10 seconds to get into character,

and you have 30 seconds to get it right, and then we're moving on. And he probably felt like he was doing a good take. He was like, and then the last thing you think of is like an issue elsewhere. Yeah, and the guy walks over and starts fiddling with lights while he's doing that. It's like, I fucking totally get it.

It was totally unjustified the way he spoke to the guy, but it was still like, dick, but. That was, he was, that was like, from on high, he's the guy. Yeah, he was still like dick. That was he was that was like from on high. He's coming down. I had my favorite scream in it. It was in a let's play in the GCA one that just came out on Monday. I guess this would be a week ago today. Oh, we can go to the tweet about that.

Well, we're just flying around in in Bezra's, which is like the jet you can buy you has an eject to see. It takes kind of a long time to get him because they only spawn at airports. You got to drive to the airport and get him. I accidentally flew over the military base and they just shoot you down So I was like really annoyed and also like kind of in character as my little dude So I got shot and my play was just plummeting and I screaming let ran our breath mid-screen

I was like and I started another one. It was like and everyone is like in love with that scream Playing insertion playing in straight just like out of nowhere. I easily could know, watch that now. It was a sex show. What's the episode title? Playing insertion. Playing insertion. There's just like, ow, no, I easily could have just gone. Oh, I've got shut down. For some reason, I just decided to be really into it. You have something that you do in a lot of Chima Hunter videos that makes me laugh every time.

It's when you're like, oh, you get that really throaty scream. Yeah, usually when I know I'm about to die and someone's chasing me. Do you have any slaps? I miss lets plays. We used to do that when we were doing the laser team as someone's chasing me. Dude, I miss laughing. I miss lets place. We used to do the one we were doing the laser team backer things. For the podcast, lets place. We played my favorite one that we ever did was it was you, Gavin, and Gus.

Left or dead? We were playing with the dead. Yeah, hey. Never came out there. We don't remember our contagion one. We were both cockroaches. The only one that didn't come out was the contagion one with me, you, Ashley, and Meg. Because we lost a video on it. That was left for one that didn't come out was the conchanging one with me, you Ashley and Meg, because we lost a video on it.

That was left for death that didn't come out. No, left for death came out. Bernie Hamier pro-paint tanked and was like, oh, I'm scared. So the one that did right after that and left for death didn't come out. He didn't? I don't think it was with Blaine then.

That's what I was thinking. Really? Yeah. Who would have put it out? Gus? Ah, see. That's really frustrating. I have a video right now.

Gus, I think at the time decided it wouldn't come out. I was like, what? It was fine. That was fine. Really? Yeah. Yeah, so you can't, there you go. Why didn't you just tell Gus to put it out?

Because he'd be like, no. Pfft. I'm gonna do this thing. He got, he left for, I got confused. This is Tuesday, Pax is this weekend. Some reason Gus left for Pax on Tuesday to go to Seattle.

That's where he is. Yeah. Oh, you must have like a thing though. Maybe. Is that what it means? It's a big assumption. I think you just want to be away from here for longer. Yeah, I think that's what it was.

I'm with Barbara on that. I could hang out with her. I'm going to tweet that he's fucking drinking at 8 a.m. 840 in the morning, he's drinking at the airport. Come on. That's too much. You're just gonna celebrate, sleeping forever.

840 in the morning. Do you think if I'm at the airport a 40 in the morning, I'm just like I hate everything. Yeah, and he's like, I'm gonna drink the idea of that at that time We probably made me want to throw up. Yeah, make you want to throw even like a blay Mary or a mimosa Blay Mary nice. Blay Mary's gross. Blay Mary's are all right. No, it's gross. Like alcohol. It ketchup We're going to swissatic and they had the blame Mary Bar. Make your own bloody Mary Bar. So you can make it in all of the... You can just shove cheese in.

Yeah we went to that place for brunch just the other day. Yeah so it's addict. I didn't go to that one. Great brunch. Why are you guys all brunching with each other? Oh I was invited that one too wasn't I? Yeah you didn't come. Yeah I overslept.

Oh you fucked off. That's right. No I like going, but I never get invited. You never get invited in a one time. How does anyone over sleep? I a long night. I'm afraid of the six. Dude, I love. I just sent a lot. He had to drop a girl off the airport. I remember. Well, originally, I think we only invited like a bunch of ladies to join us. And then like more people ended up coming. And I was like, Oh, yeah, I was not going. Ashley was going. I was not going. I was not

in the invite. And then I was like, Oh yeah, I was not going. Ashley was going, I was not going, I was not in the invite. And then I was like, oh, more people are coming, so feel free to invite Bernie as well. And she goes, he'll probably see us, he's a slut for brunch. I love him. I'm sure. Oh, real quick, John Boyega apparently made a tweet

and he said, hey, yes, hit me up about places that I should be visiting for my like, I don't know. He wants to do podcasts. He wants to do podcasts. First press tour for episode eight. I want to be on a podcast with John Boyega. So he's like a really lovely, really lovely, holy man.

Tell him about the podcast. So do you want to retweet that? Yeah, but John Boyega's thinking, you can't do it now, you gotta do it on Monday. Fuck. We gotta do it next Tuesday. Okay, hold on, if you know what's, when is that gonna be?

You'll have a sleep. It'll be Labor Day. Remind me on Labor Day to retweet. Interesting question. Hahaha. Thanks for watching everybody. Bye. Love you. The Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, various unsolved and rooster teeth's cryptic podcast, f*** face. Call to action.

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