Rooster Teeth Podcast - Armando for President - #734

Episode Date: January 18, 2023

Join Gus Sorola, Barbara Dunkelmen, Gavin Free, and Armando Torres as they talk presidents being too old and you should just vote for Armando, all US planes being grounded, having 100+ cousins, how weird TV commercials have gotten, and more!  This episode is sponsored by Helix Sleep & HelloFresh!  Go to http://helixsleep.com/rooster to get up to $200 off all mattress orders and two free pillows.  Go to http://hellofresh.com/rooster22 and use code rooster22 for 22 free meals plus free shipping! Already FIRST Member and need your Private RSS feed for this show? Go here: http://bit.ly/FIRSTRSS Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What would you do if you had the freedom to be anyone or to go anywhere without limitations? Start your journey and experience for yourself the feeling of total freedom when you game with Alienware. Alienware is your portal to new worlds where limits don't exist and the only rules are the ones you decide to make. Defy boundaries and start gaming now at Alienware.com. Next-gen gaming is built with Intel Core i9 processors. This is a Ruestur-Teeth production. Hello everyone and welcome to the receive podcast. I'm Gus. I'm Kevin.

I'm Kai. I'm Armando. There we are. And I'm Gus. I want to say this is a pre-record. We're off on Monday, so we're pre-taping this so apologies. We're not live. But we're off for a good reason though.

Yes, what is it? Yes, yeah. What is it, Gus? It's a milk computer. It's a milk cake. I don't know what it is. I'm a case therefore. Harvey Milk.

Martin Luther King, God, I'm going to attack you. Martin Luther King, what? Junior. There we go. There we go, because he's not the first one he had a father. Yeah, I'm not the first one either. But since we're pre-taping, it's not the 16th. Regardless, today is also holiday.

I don't know if you guys know it. Don't look at your calendar. It's a very special day. Today's the day. It's Armando's birthday. Yeah! Are you torn to? Armando Torres, what? It's a very special day today's a day. It's our Mundo's birthday. Yeah Armando Torres why

So we brought you a birthday cake All right, Armando I have a genuine question. I'm a story most happy birthday story producer Armando T When your family seems happy birthday, how they there's so many versions, how do they sing it? Because I'll do it right now. Probably, Feli, Scoobly, Anios, Adios, yeah. In Spanish. Feli, Scoobly, Anios. Uh-huh. Atty.

That's got key. Oh, every birthday here. Wow, let's get some cake going. Let's hope that this hasn't. Oh, the second try. Blow out those candles. Let's get some fun cake going. Let's hope that this hasn't. Oh, you messed up. Second try. No dreams for you. Okay, try. Fourth try. You've got to pause out. There you go. Hey, fourth try, best try. Not your only try.

Let's all have some spit covered cake now. Yeah. Oh, yeah. What kind of cake is this? What kind of cake is it, Tyler? Wow. OK, so it looks like there might be some pecans on the side there. Yeah, Tyler messaged me at like two in the morning and was like, do you have any allergies? And I said cats. There might be some cat hair in this.

Not what you meant. A lot of people in research have cats. A might be some cat hair in this. Not what you meant. A lot of people in Rochelle Five cats. A lot of people in Rochelle Five cats. What do you have against cats? Me? They're just not dogs. Not wrong.

Dogs are better. Dogs are better than cats. I love dogs. I don't know. I like a dog. I like a good dog, but I love a bad cat. Okay, okay, okay. Hold on, hold on, hold on, because we all know another word for cat is,

so I didn't know, yes, I didn't know, that's what you, okay, it is, all right, good. I'm saying, no, I'm saying like I love a good bitch, but I love a bad pussy, you know what I'm saying? Yes, all right, you said it. Yeah, what did you not wanna say pussy, whole? This is the internet, we gotta be pussy. I asked someone with a pussy, I'll say pussy. You know what I'm saying? Yes, all right. You said it. Yeah, but did you not want to say pussy hole? This is the internet. I'm gonna be pussy.

I'll say pussy. I'll say pussy. I forget. I don't want to. I always forget. I always forget what level of Kai comes to our depockets. I try to let it build up, but then our Mondos here. So there was no build up.

There is none. Yeah, no, I really. It does feel weird to say pussy at 11 in the morning though. That does feel like an afternoon. Imagine having a pussy 21st of it. You just say it. No, I feel like at 10, I would say like vagina. No. Yeah.

So each day slightly more reserved. Yeah. And as you progress, yeah. By the afternoon, I'm just like, fuck it. Pussy. You're just full out. Conte by the way. That's after dark 2 a.m.

Oh, You're just full out count by the way. Yeah, that's after dark 2 a.m. Mm-hmm. Oh. Manda, I enjoy getting served by Gus. How do you feel about it? I like it a lot. He'd what? I don't know. You have been made it better if Gavin served us. Yeah, I serve.

I serve the next round. Because look at the group of people here at the table. I really been really nice of Gavin with the one that served us. Well, if Gavin would have done it, it would have taken two hours on a counter how slow motion Because you would have had to make it slow-mo See, that's what you think but check this out

It was also very difficult because this isn't actually a knife. It's not oh no no no no no no no no That was pretty clean Oh my god wait now what's the plan? Perfect. Oh, that's beautiful. Oh my god wait now what's the plan? Perfect. Oh, that's beautiful. Oh my god it's a mushroom table a mushroom tree and I would say that was quite fun. Why did it pop? Yeah, we'll get the slow moan in editing. Yeah, we'll cut it in later. Alright, since this is pre-recorded, bow it's right now. Oh, you gave someone some luck there. They got going to the file now, dude. No, I'm not gonna bow. No, it's gonna be very funny when they ignore me.

A little early morning cake, never heard anyone. It's okay. It's like breakfast, right? People have like banana bread and shit for breakfast. So as I'm about to eat this, Gus, you and I have talked about the four-eyed Gavin, you might know this, I don't like cake. What?

Oh yeah, that's right, I forgot that. Yeah, I'm not a cake fan. Oh, I'm sorry. Could do it that way. So we have gotten you a different dessert on a live birth. That's shit on your birthday, dude. Now Gus, you might not know this,

but I hate Armando's choice of birthday food. So what flavor is it? We surprised you. I wanted a cat here. Oh shit. I didn't get a birthday cake. Wait, I might not have been here. I probably avoid my birthday on this podcast, I think. My birthday so far, as I've worked have been here. I probably avoid my birthday on this podcast.

My birthday so far as I've worked at Ristratif has always been on a weekend. I feel like a birthday should be, and this should be like everywhere in the world, at least in America thing, where your birthday should be a day off for you. Oh, yeah. Like it's a gimmie. And this is going one step further. You should legally be allowed to choose two other people Oh, even if they don't work at your office that also get the payoff on your birthday. I like this

Yeah, see I thought you were gonna go with you know two other people at your office I'm like both of you to assume Everyone likes today work with no, I like I like this idea Let's so you can like give in to your boss a little cod that says it's my friends birthday Yeah, and they don't even look and they don't work I like this idea. So you can like give in to your boss, a little card that says it's my friend's birthday. And they don't even work here. And they don't work here. It's like a doctor's name.

And then your boss calls their boss. And then they get, yeah, that boss is off because it's someone else's birthday. Oh yeah. So they can't get through. It is gonna create a lot of supply chain issues. They will. Yeah.

Yeah, how they work, they can prove it. Think about how many people have a birthday on any given day and then multiply that by another two people. Two people, yeah. Every day. There's only 366 at most, days in a year. Yeah, because- And then-

And there's billions of people, so people share birthdays. So every- I'm not sure my birthday ever. You don't show your birthday with anybody. Have you ever- Think about how much better the world would be, especially because like, all right, let's say normally, before this law gets enacted,

you're a lonely piece of shit. No one wants to hang out with you. That's me. But on your birthday, you got two days off. You got maidens. You've got maidens today. Everyone wants to be nice to you now. I really like this.

I want you to be our president. Yeah, me too. That's why I will be running in 2024. Matt. You're not old enough, dude. You're going to age a few more years. What? What?

You have to be 35 to be president. Fuck. Why? That's a rule. You have to be 35. You have to have been born in the United States. Yeah, you've got at least 10 days off before you get to that age. Before.

10 days off and 20 days off. 20 other people, 20 days off before you get to that age. Before. 10 days off and 20 plays. Other people, 20 days off. That's so what changes at 35 that makes you eligible to be president? I mean, the same thing that changes when you can drink at 21. I've seen 16-year-old TikTokers that are smarter than former presidents. That's all I want to say. And it's all arbitrary rules. I mean, think about all the fucked up stupid rules

that used to exist that, thank God we've gotten rid of a lot of them. We should probably get rid of the age one too. Why not, fuck it. Or at least move it to the other end of age. Where is the other end? 35 minutes. Like if you're like, wait, what?

It's the beginning. It's almost 35. Yeah, I can be president next year. What? Not here. You know, born in Nebraska. No, it's not Nebraska. What not here? You know, you're born in Nebraska It's in the middle meme one city in Nebraska I know

You know any one in England if you asked them to name like a city in a state. They just name it different state You know fucked up. It is is that I thought the bit was that Nebraska was a city You know what the fuck up it is is that I thought the bit was that Nebraska was a city. It's screwed up, I forgot it was a fucking state. Maybe you shouldn't be president. No. You be president for 49 states. Fuck you, Nebraska. I think the 70.

70. No, it's everyone who's president is like, the president should have something to live for. Yeah. What? You're gonna say every president's already every president We like this already like at the end of their life. Yeah, they don't care if they fuck shit up They're gonna be dead in two years anyway. Are you saying 70? That's what I'm saying You're arguing in the mind my point you said 70 or 17 17

70 he's saying that's where you cap it. Yeah, but you know our Pohlem it that's why it's okay, okay, wait no no, no wait, I still stand by what you said though Gus cuz two reasons one our term present is 70 so the fact yes In his 70 so that means he wouldn't have been able to do it. He's in his 80s. Yeah And then secondly Okay, Barack Obama is actually someone who was fairly young when he first got elected to office considering right did you see the how that man A's over the time of eight years He didn't have a gray hair in sight when he started and now he might as well go bold to be fair though

He still would have aged a yes Yes, but you don't understand black don't crack the way it does when you're president that was different It did hit him hard, but he was right. I think he was also right at that perfect age I looked it up. He was he was president between the time he was 47 and 55 Wow, that's very young. Yeah, that is oh shit. That's it. That's something like a little older than me That's very young. Well, that's the full the full sentence is black don't crack unless you're ordering drone strike after drone strike That'll break it. That'll do it. You know, who is our oldest president? I think Biden. Biden. I think so. It would have been who was Biden running against the I voted for and I

forgot. Trump. No, no, no, on the democratic side. Bernie, isn't Bernie younger than Joe? I don't think so. He just looks bad. Keep me going through it. But Biden looks great. So Joe Biden's 80 years old Bernie Sanders's 81. Oh, I was right. You're one year. You're one year. But like, all right, I don't want to get super political because I don't care.

It's Biden was the oldest Trump was the second oldest. I think like Bernie Sanders has like 40-year-old energy. Like I've seen videos of him sprinting before. I couldn't imagine Biden walking downstairs. He's also kind of looked that age for 35 years. Yes. He's been consistently old, which I love for him. Because like, if you're just consistently staying at one place,

even if it's old, that means you can't get worse. I think that's why I like Maggie Smith, because she's been an old woman for like 40 years. Oh, yeah. And it's comforting, because she's still around. She'll be there. You want to take a guess as to how old she is? Uh, 79.

81. 88. Whoa! Oh! Yeah, and I guess she was always like aged up when she was younger. Yeah, I'm not looking up who Maggie Smith is McGonigal

Do you watch Harry Potter? No, or read Harry Potter? We don't stand down to nabby and I never will I do recognize this woman. I ain't and by the way, I'm sorry to you and your people for this, but I've never read Harry Potter. And well, that's like your national anthem, right? It's all of prison in a basketball. Yeah, sports game. You just start with the boy who lived chapter one. Yeah, but at the time you get to who came to die, that's when the footies start.

I've never read any of the books, but I saw the first movie, and then I saw the second half of the last movie. And you know the story, you know what I got? I feel like I got pretty much everything. People are crying and I'm like, who's that guy? I don't get it. People are crying.

We're snakebats. People crying. What did snake go? We're snake go. The first snake go? We're snake go. The first book came out in 97. I was already. I was born. I was in I was 19.

I was born, baby. You two are the same age. He's older than me. Yeah, I was born in 96. January 11, 19. I was born in 97 April. Who, which two people have in the day off? Yeah, it's a Monday. who are you taking off with you?

Uh, Gavin and Kyle, let's go. Oh, that, okay. Oh, got, oh, well, um, yeah, get back to work, let's, um, let's look at the news. Dude, oh. See, it's fun, it's so inconveniences. Yeah. Oh, the planes are off.

Oh, the planes got turned off this morning. I don't know if you all saw that. Yeah, I did see it because I was supposed to travel today. Were you? And check into a flight. Oh, it's a point. Uh, yeah, I did see it because I was supposed to travel today. Were you? And check into a flight at some point. Yeah, I guess every, How do, how do plane turn not on? Every flight in the United States got grounded.

Nobody, no planes could fly. Which if I'm not mistaken, is the first, and this is a weird thing to say while eating birthday cake, is the first time it's happened since 9-11. Yeah, and it's January 11. Oh God, think about that. I don't want to.

Why? There's like a system went down that distributes like alerts and updates to pilots. And without these like using updates, like they can't fly. It's sometimes mundane stuff, like the lights don't work on this runway or there's a crane by this runway

or there's animals on the runway. Like, don't forget. Yeah, imagine if your hue bulb couldn't connect to their service, so all of the light bulbs in the country went off. I mean, it's. I think it's a little more complicated than that, but I do.

Is that not also what kind of white, it's not called white 2K is, but you know when the year went from 99 to 2000, whatever that is. Yeah, white 2K. Is that what it's called?, see now is my generation Z stuff when I hear Y2K I think of like year 2000 style because that's what it is like oh my god I'm going to a Y2K party dress like you're from the 2000 Y2K literally It stands for year 2000. Yeah, so anytime someone says Y2K typically they mean like a theme

Yeah, she thinks of the theme as a event It is fucked up though that we do call like Y2K fashion because mean like a theme. Yeah, she thinks of the theme as a event. It is fucked up though that we do call like Y2K fashion because it was a huge deal. It was a huge event. Like people are freaking out about it. But that'd be like, if I was like, oh yeah, early 2000s fashion, you know, like that 9-11 style, it'll be fucked up.

I don't know. Same ring to it. Yeah, it does sound good. I mean, there's a ring to it if you have no context. The minute you have context, you're like, oh no. So you're big Y2K style fan? I mean, it's funny because my brother was born in the year 2000, and my sister was born in the year 2003.

So to me, it was just what I grew up with. Her brother can drink now. No, why? Born in the year 2000, can drink alcohol. He's 22. He's been able to drink for over a year. Wow. That's wild. That's nuts. If you lived in England, you could have been drinking for half a decade. That's okay. That's why we take yearly trips to the Caribbean. Oh, is that what's the drink? Can I JTN? Yes.

I, uh, you could also go to Mexico over the drinking ages. Come here, Meele. Yeah. The drinking ages. Can you, can you ask for it? Yeah, fuck it, you can have it. Get in here. Well, I was like, I went to Europe, and I was really afraid that they weren't gonna like accept my ID any time I would get like, carded or something. And then I realized that like in most of Europe, it's like, are you 12? Yeah.

Could we send you to fight in the Great War? Well, then get in here, buddy. Yep. You can do it. Step on up to the bar. Yeah, it's very funny how America values children, but also doesn't value children at all. No, we hate children.

We hate children. We despise them, but hey, in writing, we care. I don't even care in writing. I say children suck. Oh, hot tape. I think that they shouldn't be allowed to be children until they're 30. Yeah, go up babies.

Yeah. So, you become a child at the day. You get to enter the world. That is true, actually, because I- So, you basically become president at five. Oh my god. And you can take two friends with you. Only two though.

Yeah. I got a lot of friends who aren't even going to make it to born. Because if you're not making it to 30, you're gonna have to. How much would you pay to have to be the only person with your birthday? Oh, now I'm not paying for that. Zero. You wouldn't pay like 10 bucks and everyone else would go either side. I guess so. Yeah.

I pay 20. I pay 20 bucks. 20 bucks. Do you think, I mean, I know it's probably no. Do you think that there's, what are the chances that there's one day that does belong to one guy? It's called the 29th of February. No, because I know people born on leap, I know a lot of them are easier babies. Are you saying that that could be someone who's got the only, but the only day?

That's impossible. That's impossible. Yeah, like it's a statistical anomaly where like August 3rd for some reason there's never been a baby. That would be a weird fucked up thing. Yeah, well, there has to be, to be fair, there has to be at least populated birthday. Yeah, of course. February 29th.

Still gonna be millions. But even then though, that's because the problem is that time zone exists. Yeah. So it's always, even like eight hours in the future, like right now in Australia, it's tomorrow. So it's always, even like eight hours in the future, like, right now in Australia, it's tomorrow. So there's always someone somewhere.

It's also a summer, which is fucking wild. It's a summer. It's June there. Yeah. According to what I'm reading from July of 2020, there are about 4.1 million people in the world whose birthday is on leap day, February 29th. But not including that day was the least Not including that day because that day's bullshit the least common birthday is

It's Christmas day Christmas day really What's nine months watch Christmas day? March 25th. What it just happens to be Christmas day. I just people don't schedule like March, what it just happens to be Christmas. I just people don't schedule like Because see if they're gonna have see sections it's such a large percentage of births and I know a lot of people I was like I don't want my children to be born Honestly before or after Christmas because then you have to combine days and whatnot So they'll just hold it. They'll hold it because you're busy on Christmas. No push the sex and stock

I can't give birth right now. Stop the't stop the flow. It's a willpower. For C-section, it's whatever the hell you want. As someone who's never been pregnant, it's a keep it in. It's not coming out. Second least common is New Year's Day. This is the main event. Yeah.

So this is a US based list I'm looking at now. Well, that's all that matters. Christmas Day, New Year's Day, Christmas Eve, Fourth of July, January 6th. We're going to be in July. January 2nd, December 26th. November 27th, November 23rd, November 25th, the Thanksgiving. No, actually, I take it back.

I know exactly why that's the case. It's not because people want to avoid those days. It's because on those days, that's when people are fucking the most. So you can't have a baby on a day that you're fucking. That's nine months in the future. That's why every other day, I'm telling you, that's what it is. Well, it makes sense because the most common birth month,

according to this, is September. Because, it's Valentine's Day. The most common birth, well, no, it was not a date like December. The most common birthdays are September 19th, September 12th, September 17th, September 10th. The top five are all right there. What's nine months before that? What did you say it was?

It'll be early December. Early December, yeah. So the holidays between Thanksgiving and people are cold. Yeah. We're cold. It's cold and that's how we warm up. Nine out of the top 10 birthdays are September. The only exception is July 7th,

which is number six on that list. Seven minus two. That's October. Yeah. I guess my question was, people schedule it maybe, seven, seven, lucky day. What is so unsexy about March that people aren't having babies around there?

Because I'm dying. Oh no. I like it. I'd fuck somebody without it. It's what's unsexy in June. What's on June? It's just hot and gross. Summer starting.

I like to grow with a thick eye. With a puffy eye? With a thick eye, yeah. Do you mean like this one? Oh yeah, I was showing this before. Two seas. Like, no, you can see the camera put these back on. I do like that I've done the math on it.

And there's like a date range of when my parents could have done it to make me. Have you been seeking this information now? We've been doing reverse engineering, you both. Yeah, I wanted to see like one that could be and the date range is like 420 is right there in the middle. And I'm hoping that that's why I turned out the way that I am. It's precedent. Yeah, that's how they did it. I was born about nine months after my parents got married.

Ooh. I was born a year and a month after my parents got married. So I was not a honeymoon baby. It's very funny when you're like, weren't they married that month? And you're like, oh. Yeah, once you see, like, once you're old enough to think about it, it's not trying to like work backwards.

Like, oh, okay. No, I'm just a random July baby. I do like that though, is that you're not a honeyman baby. You're like, we're just getting settled baby. Like we got the new apartment baby. Yeah, like we still love each other. We're not like fighting all the time, but things aren't like perfect.

We just bought a new mattress baby. Mm-hmm. That's what I mean. You're a, did you remember to take out sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, any of that. I got homies that, I got homies having babies and they'll like tell me about it and I'm like, No, that's what I'm saying. So a lot of times when we're like, oh my god, congratulations on your marriage.

Are you trying for a baby? Like yeah, we're trying sometimes. They submit to having non-stop, untrusted, sex, just dripping out. It's like it's crazy. Okay, wait, why is it dripping out? You should call it, you should call it what it is. You should go to your family and go,

that's right everybody. I'm plowing her. I'm fucking. But yes we're trying. We're raw doggan. Yeah, it's not, I'm trying it. She's getting dick down raw. In the morning, I'm in her vagina after two.

I'm in the pussy. It's the same. Just record that and play it back for your family to let them know you're trying to have a baby. God, it's the same. Just record that and play it back. Yeah. For your family, tell them you're trying to have a baby. It's so weird. It's such a strange concept to me as a young Latino man to hear the phrase trying to have a baby. Most of us spend all the lives trying to do the opposite and failing and making nine children.

Yep. I see them. You have a really big family. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I gotta, so I'm half white and... Right. Representation matters. We can all be perfect.

I'm one-sixteenth white. Oh, I'll forgive it, but yeah, I'm half white and my white family is like really small and also very spread out like They they don't live near each other. They don't really make new versions of themselves And then my Mexican family was just like oh yeah, grandpa had like five families and was a migrant worker And was just all over the place So I've got like on my mom's side, I have two cousins and they're twins. So they're like the same cousin over there. Yeah.

It's like it wasn't two at different occasions. It was all like, we did it. Yeah, we got one cousin and we made backup. And then on my dad's side of the family, there's like, I think my immediate, like uncles and aunts. I love that I think. Yeah, I don't even, I can't even tell you for sure anymore,

but I know that I have at least like, my dad's direct brothers and sisters from his same mom and dad. I have one, two, three, four, five, six, six cousins. That's not bad. But that's not including like, there's, I have other uncles and aunts, and so they're like kids.

I think 25 that I could name, that you can, that I could name, and then other ones that I don't even know about. We just kind of separate them where we got like, we got the North Cal cousins. Yeah. We got the Texas cousins.

We did a documentary with Ristraty the few years ago about immigration and a documentary crew followed me down to visit my family and stuff. And when we were filming here in Austin, the director was asking me some questions and I was like, and I told him, I was like, yeah, I think I've got over 100 cousins. And he was like, bullshit.

Like you're lying to me, I don't believe it. Then we drove down to visit my family. And the first thing we did, we walked into my house and asked my mom, unprompt, I was like, Bullshit, you're lying to me. I don't believe it. Then we drove down to visit my family. And the first thing we walked into my house and asked my mom, unprompt, I was like, Mom, how many cousins do you think I have? She's like, oh, I don't know. Maybe like 110, 120 somewhere around there. I was like, you see?

Yeah. You have massive amounts of cousins if you're Latino. It just, it comes with territory. It's going to be going to watch movies or TV shows. If you were like, yeah, it's my cousin. Like, you know, it's like my best friend. It's like my cousin, you know, where we sit and share such a ball.

Like, man, I've got so many cousins. It's crazy that like, so it's probably the same in your family, but in my family, there's like clicks of cousins. Yeah, absolutely. I get along with some of my cousins and then there's other cousins around like, I can't stay in there motherfuckers.

So not all of your cousins would pick you as one of that two people. No, absolutely not. Interesting. But they would choose other cousins. Right. In the cousin click. I got cousins that feel like brothers,

I got other cousins that feel like enemies. Got enemies, got a lot of enemies. I was talking like second cousins and not first first. We're talking first cousin. Yeah, I have full. Hi. OK, then I have a question for everyone though, because I think at least in the black community,

as far as I've seen, when it comes to family, we're always closer to our mom's side of family than our dad's side of family. Does that still apply? Um, yeah, I guess. closer to our mom's side of family than our dad's side of family. Does that still apply? Yeah, I guess. I mean, you only have so many on your mom's side. So that makes me a little easier. I went to, so what I was doing was that the cousins that my family is closest to are my grandmother's family. Like her siblings, they're like offshoot. So that, they're drips.

Yeah, they're drips. But then it's complicated, because like I said, my grandfather had like, God, like 19 or 20 something kids or some shit, like just pumping them out. It's easy. Yeah, and only like three of them are with my grandmother. So there's, you know, they're just all over everywhere. He's doing the Nick Cannon method.

Oh yeah, yeah, but he's not giving him fun names. They're all just like his name again. Again. There's a lot of Emilio Torres Jr. So I'm like, is that so funny? Because you know, when you think of like Emilio Torres the first, the second, the third, the fourth, it's because it's like generational,

whereas you said a lot of juniors everywhere. My grandfather George Foremaning, it all over the fucking earth. It's like you got a bunch of cousins with the same name. I mean, you've got two cousins that are identical. It's like you're going through all the iterations of like copying people. Dude, sometimes I've wondered about it where like,

my grandpa's not even that handsome. So like, he must be spitting mad games. I think Charisma goes, charisma and jokes go very far. I don't. And a good dick? He probably a good dick. My grandpa probably had real good dick, actually. Like smooth.

Yeah, real smooth. No, it was definitely a course. It was a working man's cock. What are those callous? It was called, because for all that, it was for her pleasure. It was for her pleasure. He was ripped.

And I will say, if he has, you said 20 something kids, he probably only got better with experience. Oh yeah, absolutely. He was, he was doing the damn things. Does anyone ever see the, maybe I'm the one who ever sees him because I'm the one who would be targeted by these ads, but you ever see the stupid new genics ads?

Yeah, dude, all low-test cost road. They have like one commercial where it's like, Frank Thomas walk, he's like, this is low-t-towed, and there's like a scrawny dude who can't handle a water hose, trying to water his like washes car, and it's like flailing all over the place. Like make it like a sweep dude who can't handle a water hose, trying to water his, like wash his car, and it's like flailing all over the place. Like make it like a Tweed Pukon.

Right, it's like who's the dude who answered this casting call? He's like, hey, do you want to play the loser dork with a dick that doesn't work in a commercial? I love money, it's funny. We talked about this on a stream recently. We're like, I've gone out for casting calls that are just like fat customer. Like sometimes at a certain point,

you're like, look, I don't feel good about this, but Papa's gotta eat. Papa's gotta stay fat customer. It's like, I know where you're gonna put me in the box. I'll just run myself there. Like why would I fight the power when I could just get the money? I wonder who on IMDB has the most credits

for a generic character like fat customer. Like how many projects? You've seen Hector, right? Who's Hector? Google Hector Actor. There's one Hispanic dude that gets all the roles. And as soon as Gus pulls them up, you're gonna be able to do it.

Oh, that's God here. Yeah. You're gonna see it and you're gonna know exactly who I've been talking about. Oh, yeah. You're probably seeing him. You're guys in Ali G in the house. Yeah, he's also on my blood. Everything didn't he get a monkey up his asshole and Bruce will my I think so.

He gets so much he he gets like any kind of like generic gangbang or Mexican. He's a training day. Yeah, he's in dude. He is in the fast and furious. Yeah, I want to say he he's like Yeah, I wanna say he's like one of, I think he's like an ex-convict actor. He's like done really well. That's stereotypical. I would say that.

I legit. But it also might be true. I think like that's part of his story. That's kind of the beauty of being diverse in Hollywood is that once you're in, you're just kind of in. Like you'll see the same kind of black actors in his movie, just yo, you'll see the same kind, like every single acting crazy rich agents,

if they make a second one, it's gonna be back in crazy versions. I can't claim this joke. I heard Michael say it first. I'll give him his props. But really, once you're diverse in Hollywood and you're in, you just got roles for days. Anybody else speaking of diversity in Hollywood,

anybody else watched the Golden Globes last night? I have Twitter. I have Twitter, I know this. So basically, Hollywood Foreign Press has had issues. They canceled the Golden Globes last year, and Gerard Carmichael hosted it, and just like right off the bat coming out, he's like, hey, I know, you're probably wondering why I'm here.

It's because I'm black. Yep. Yep. Yep. And then just like went on like the whole 10-minute monologue was just like at times was like I don't know why anyone's laughing at this. This is not something I think you should be laughing at. But yeah, then in the end he's like, you know, I know people who know me might be wondering why I took the job.

He's like, I called for Anne to talk it, and they all said the same thing. Hey, at the end of the day, it's $500,000. He said, take the money. Take the money. This episode of The Receipt Podcast is brought to you by Helix Sleep. I don't know about you all, but my holidays were spent eating lots of good food, hanging out with loved ones,

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For $5,000? I've been talking with Michael about this the last couple days. Michael and Eric specifically. Oh, that's a great combination of people to talk to. Of like, if I, and I think we may have talked about this on the last podcast, and I'm sorry if we did, but like, if I needed to make a career change, like things are going bad, I really gotta get the fuck outta here.

I could full switch, hard right turn and become like an alt-right Fox guy, where like I go on like these Republican shows and I'm just like, you know what? As a Mexican, your viewpoint is correct and I would sell the fuck out in a heartbeat. You'd be like that Woody Harrelson gift, like drawing your tears with like,

but yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. I could, you could do that. That's the one thing that every non-white person in Hollywood has right now is, but if you really need to, because they need us, dude. They really need us to go back, by the way, the New Genics commercials,

so I've been staying in a hotel in Austin for the last week, and I've been watching a lot of cable television, which I forget. That's what it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I's what it is. Yeah, yeah. I forgot what it felt like to watch, like, imagine you go on Netflix, you watch an episode of the office,

you're in and out in like what, 19, 20 minutes. I'm gonna have been stretching that experience out 45 minutes and every five minutes you're stopping to watch for you new genics. I almost call it eugenics. You know, I know it's totally different. It feels like what it is though. They're like, we wrapped, we rounded up everyone with low T and put them in one yellow tea town. Welcome to low T ghetto. Oh, God.

Was it just testosterone supplement? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Where you got former, I assume NFL players. Well, yeah, well, and baseball. Frank Thomas was a baseball player. Doug Flutey was a football player. It's like former at professional athletes. Former professional athletes who are just like, yep, we also had low T, but we weren't little bitches about it. That's like the vibe that they have.

And then you follow a hero character who is just a guy who claims to be have like turn 40. My favorite part of that commercial is at the very end, they'll throw the hero character like a bottle of the pills and go, all you gotta do is take new genics and then they catch it and they're standing next to like their girlfriend and the spokesperson will go, and hey, she'll like it too.

And then wink or blow a kiss at the girl. And then they cut back and the girl's like, what's funny to me is it's so obvious normally they don't film the reverse. They don't film those at the same time. Like they'll film the athletes one day or whatever and then they'll film the reverse another day when the athletes are on set.

And often you'll see the athlete be like, and she'll like it too and wink to one side and then they cut to the reverse and the woman's on the other side. That's not even worth geographically. That's not where she was standing. This doesn't make sense. I don't know if you've I don't know how many other people are you seeing these on TV or I'm a boomer dude. I'm not actually but thank God because I had so many questions. The first question is what are y'all's viewing preferences if this is just showing up on your feed But okay, we will fix that. I'm a man over 40 like when anything I'm gonna watch is gonna be filled with The other side. I still have another question. What the fuck can are you all watching? I'm not going to be central. Yeah, comedy said Again, I'm watching 45 minutes of the office. I feel like this. That's so crazy to me. Yeah, it does, and it's weird to see. It's funny because Comedy Central also,

like commercials in content is why, like you talk about, like you put on streaming, watch it through, like Comedy Central has started leaning into the commercial aspect of programming, like they'll say like, hey, you know, they'll have a commercial, be like, this evening, we're gonna show movies with breaks. That is, that's verbatim what they have.

Yeah. You wanna watch grownups, but take a break every six minutes. Watch movies with breaks. Comedy Central. I was fucking late because I was watching grownups with breaks. Yeah, I was just gonna be fuck,

I'm sitting on the edge of my bed, just fucking. Mmm. Watching this movie, and then any time the new genics commercial goes on, I go, okay, I'll go get that again. There are some movies that I can't watch now without, because I used to record a lot of movies of TV. Yeah. Like, I think I watch Golden Isle off my taped VHS version, and I still remember where all the ads should be.

Like, it's weird when Sean Bingos goes for England James and it doesn't fade out to a nest cafe. Like I just go straight to the next bit. I'm like, oh I'm not used to the full version yet. One thing that I've noticed about the New Gen X commercial and it might be a little weird to bring up and I'm so I'm sorry everyone but they filmed two different versions of it. And the only difference is that the stand-in, so whenever I say hero character, that's an advertising term which just means that you are the stand-in for the audience.

It's a surrogate form. Yeah, cool viewer. It's like if you, like you would be the guy who's like over 40 needs testosterone, whatever. So the only difference between the- I'm not going to be the guy over 40 that needs testosterone? You might be. You don't know. I don't know.

Actually, right. I question my gender coughed in. Off the coughed in. Coughed in? I question my gender coughed in. Yes. But the only difference between these two commercials is that the hero character in one is white

and in the other one he's black. Yes. And I've noticed that the hero character in one is white and in the other one he's black. And I've noticed that the only difference in airing them on Comedy Central is when they choose to air them. They'll air the one with the white guy when I'm watching late night and they'll air the one with the black guy during the day.

And I'm still trying to figure out why that's the decision that they took. I wonder also what the program is, what you're watching, if they choose... If it's that granular. So here's, I also thought that too. And then I realized that the one with the black guy was showing up during Seinfeld. And I was like, maybe... What's his name?

Did a whole album based on... What's his name? Fucking, there album based on, what's his name? Fucking, there ain't no pizza get out. Wale. Wale did an album based on, it's called an album about nothing that is samples a bunch of sign felt episodes. So maybe, I don't know.

It's been this weird thing. The other thing is like, I'm going fucking crazy. I'm watching TV, I'm like, with breaks. I'm watching TV, I'm like, with breaks. I'm watching commercials and analyzing them. I've seen the same commercial for the new season of Stephen Colbert presents tuning out the news. And it's driving me fucking wild.

Oh God, he had the grub to mic for this one. They have a line in that, where they go, oh, I'm about to see Stephen Colbert presents the news, we're doing a new season after the day, the show blah, blah, blah they go, oh, welcome back, Stephen Colbert, presents the news, we're doing a new season after the day the show blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, whatever. And then they have like a screen that says like, oh, you can watch it at this time, blah. And then it cuts back to the character who goes,

hey, nobody tell anything about how over the holiday break, the news got hair plugs and then it moves on. And the first time I heard that I went, what? It's the bit, I don't get the bit. Second time I saw it, I go, oh, like you would tell to friends, like, hey, don't say anything about how like Kevin got hair plugs or whatever.

Third time I saw it, I went, okay, that is the joke, but it's not funny. By the 19th time I saw that ad, it made me start hating Stephen Colbert as a person. And now I can, oh, I'm mad. I can feel the rage, oh my God, I feel the waves. My wife hates watching things with me. Because especially like animation,

like I'll be watching it, then I'll pause it and rewind it. She'll be like, what? I'll be like, the ribs, Hank Hill is eating right here. Have six bones on one side and five bones on the left side. He's on realistic ribs that he's eating. She's like, why are you doing this? I fucking, I was, I went yesterday to watch a movie with Fredo and Fredo's partner and Barb and Trevor.

Sorry, you get to do it. I know, it's a motion. It was Avatar. It was a vegan movie. It was Megan. I was seeing Megan. It's a good movie. It's really fun. It was a Megan movie. It was Megan. I was seeing Megan. It's a good movie. It's really fun.

It's stupid as shit. And my favorite part about the movie is you can tell when there are scenes that they filmed only for the trailer. And if you're wondering what scenes watch the trailer because they're all in it. The dancing in the whole way, bit. Yeah. That doesn't make sense. I'm, this is a spoiler. That scene makes no sense in the context of the movie,

where you see it happen. And I think there's even a line from the character that she starts chasing that's like, what the fuck is it? What's going on? Movie is very self-aware. It's very campy. It's super, like I really...

It was written and produced by a black woman. Didn't know that. Yeah, it's really sick. There are issues with it, but there are, I mean, like, as from a story perspective, but overall, I had, like, such a blast, and it's a really fun movie, but that part where I was like,

oh, I have issues with it. That's what I'm talking about. Where after the movie ended, I was talking with Trevor about, like, yeah, I felt like the motivations, they sort of change of the movie, and I wish that they were sort of a bridge, there was talking with Trevor about like, yeah, I felt like the motivations, they sort of changed on the movie, and I wish that they were sort of a bridge, there was this element where they were filming shots,

that were clearly just for the trailer, and it felt a little bit weird, it was very, very, very, and I'm like going on about this, and he goes, I wish that I could like watch stuff and piece it apart, but also it seems like it ruins the fun. You don't want that. Yeah, you do not want that. Yeah, because now my entire life is doing what you do.

Where I like pause cartoons and go back and go rib wrong. Or I watch New Genics commercial and I go, it's curious how the hero character changes. Same here, I'm like the eye line doesn't match the reverse shot here. They need to do that. Yeah, I'm always not able to watching trash on Netflix. Like love is blind.

And I'm just like, that's it's so good. And I'm like, their freaking on that place. Like love is blind. And I'm just like, and I'm like, their freaking drone is set to 24 frames a second. In a 30 FPS time, and it's like the drone footage is like, it's like, it's like, and I wish I could unsee that stuff. The worst is sometimes also in reality television

where you're watching a scene and it's like back and forth between people talking and then one person's clothes change when they could only come back. Like, whoa, obviously this is a different like, or like their hair's totally different than it was just two seconds ago. You've seen that RayJ clip, right? Where his beanie changes positions

like 40 times and 10 seconds. No. So wherever you are, if you're listening to his podcast, fuck this show, pause it, stop it. Come back to the show. Well, actually, no, come back so you can listen to whatever I've posted. They didn't handle it.

Well, we've lost you and- All right, let's just chill out. No one's watching any of that. All right, cool. You guys want to take the day off with me? I would love to. You want to be by too? I'm watching.

I'm watching RayJay's magic hat right now. Yeah, there's a clip where every time it cuts back to RayJay, his hat is in a totally different position. It's like back and then on. Okay, so far, oh, it's on his eye. Okay, oh, it's on off his eye. Wow, and this is love and hip-hop. Yeah, every single time it cuts back.

Wow. It's very early, it was like, but, Wow. Wow. It's so great. It's very, very early. It was like, Bert, Bert. Wow. Wow. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great.

It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great.

It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great.

It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. It's so great. I follow his Twitter cuz he'll tweet shit out where he's like damn juice really strapped on pastrami And then he followed he followed it up with like I'd rather be dead before I eat a bagel like just a wild dance Dude, but he made a video with Ray Jay and did the same thing where every time it cuts back to Ray Jay his hat Yeah, you watch these things that are sucks. I was watching season two of White Lotus, and they have a lot of really beautiful slow motion shots where the frame per second is so high, and it looks so smooth, and it's also in like, four or eight K when they film it,

and with all the color correction is gorgeous, and I'm watching it with somebody, and they're like, wow, Italy looks beautiful. At the entire time, I'm thinking like, that's like five terabytes of data for this 45 second. When I was watching the Golden Globe the last night, the before, when the show first started, they started with a drone shot outside the hotel

that like swoops in and comes into the hotel. And the whole time I was watching, it's like, why are these in this drone shot? Because it comes in at an angle where nobody ever sees the hotel. Like you're not supposed to be able to look down on these parts of the hotel. So it's like you see a dirty roof. You see the drone operator standing there.

That condition. Right, you see air conditioning units. You see the top of the canopy that people walk under and it's like faded and falling apart. This is the worst angle you can show the hotel from. Because nobody's supposed to look at it from here. This was supposed to be on the ground looking up. I'm sure it looks great. That's what I was so bad.

I was like screaming at the television and the drone operators on the roof clearly standing there, looking up at the drone as it's flying by. Right before it cuts to a different shot, you see somebody come out, run out and just pointing and yelling. Just pointing and yelling. Speaking of like frames per second and stuff, there was someone on Twitter that was like,

imagine him into the Spider-Verse was always at 60 Francher's Second. So they edited Miles kind of like jumping off, becoming Spider-Man into 60 Francher's Second. And it was the most disgusting thing that I've ever seen. Would they like creating like in-between frames, like blurring, how, how are they doing it? No, it wasn't even a blurring.

It was just like, they changed the 30 Francher's Second film that was made on purpose. And what people, a lot of people don't know, is Into the Spider-Verse. Miles doesn't start out at 30 frames per second. He starts out at less, and he gets to 30 when he becomes Spider-Man to show that, like, he's now on the same level

of all the other Spider-Man. I think they also do stuff like with Interim. So like, they were on the mon like operating on these. Exactly. So the fact that they just erased all of that in a matter of seconds We're like, oh, but they can be 60 frames. Oh my god. What are they doing it to prove that it doesn't look good? No, they're like imaginives into this five or 60 frames per second. That's stupid. It is

It's like I'm sorry. Everyone needs to be have their games at 60. It's like this game reminds us to get over When when when directors are like we're gonna go for this technical thing. This is gonna be the thing about this film. Like, the Hobbit was like 48 frames, double frame. But you can't watch it at 48 frames now. Right, it was only a thing. It was only a thing. When you want your final product to be

watchable, how you intended it. Yeah. There's one thing that drives me fucking crazy. I think it's called like smart blur or some shit, like motion-smoothing. Yeah, it's this new thing on new TVs where they like, they try to it like, I don't know how it interpolates.

Yeah, it interpolates what's gonna happen and sort of like blurs the frames. But to my mind and my eye, it makes everything look like a Mexican soap opera. And it's cool, it's cool, the soap opera effect. It's like what people would prefer. Oh, that's what they call, okay, perfect. It's what people who don't like it refer to.

That's exactly how it looks to me. And it's cool for some stuff like sports or whatever, it's fine, but like I was watching, I went to my mom's new boyfriend's house, which sounds like such a weird way to start. That's it. He's a good guy, he's the personal insurance king of Minneapolis. I love that for him.

But he has one of those TVs in his house and it sucked because I was watching like season two of Fargo, which is one of the most beautiful seasons of television ever made. And it just looks like a fucking soap opera. He looks so fucking bad. That was a whole PSA that Tom Cruise did with the director of some film he was working on.

And they're basically just like screaming at the audience like, turn that shit off on your TVs, especially when you watch this film. I think it was when they were working on Fallout, it was what's named Christopher McCory. Is that a thing? I don't know. I believe that's who he would film that PSA with. Yeah. I've always been a big believer that like thing? I don't know. I believe that's who he would film that PSA with. Yeah. I've always been a big believer that like,

I try to watch movies in theaters every time that I possibly can. First of all, I love the theater experience. I truly believe also, I don't know when you're watching this podcast. But if you watch, if you wait for Megan to come out on like streaming service and you watch it at home, you're gonna be like,

what was she talking about? The movie sucked. Watch it in a theater with a bunch of people where something ridiculous happens and a whole theater goes, oh, together, like that's, it's this communal entertainment experience of field travel.

One of my first experiences of that in my age is Genshin Von Care. When I watched Frozen for the first time in theaters and Hans gets the reveal reveal the villain of like, if only someone out there loved you, the entire theater screaming in agony, like, ah, how good you. But that was also me realizing

that Disney kind of did terrible storytelling there, because I'm like, there was no signs that this man was the villain ever from the beginning at all. In fact, the trailer itself put Elsa as the villain. I was very upset at my old age of 16. You simultaneously made me feel young and ancient. I'll go out with you to bars and stuff, which is something I just don't do anymore,

because I'm old. Because you love me and be gay. Yeah, and we'll go out and I'll feel young again. I'll be like, oh yeah, this is it. And you're just like bringing out trays of shots, like a maniac. That's the last thing I want to do. Yeah, but I'm the maniac that brings out tequila shots Became bring some bombshots like a idiot who takes a shot of rum that sucks and then I'll hear a song playing

I'll be like, oh I remember like being a drunk teenager to this song and you were like, yeah, I was full Yeah, yeah, it only gets worse dude It's only gonna get worse. Yeah, every time I go out with Gus, it is a monster of time. That's gonna go out. That man, the heartiest. Oh yeah, he doesn't go out all the time. He'll go out once in a while with me

and we'll go to the clubs. Take me with you. I go out in a, when Y2K style was just style. It was just cool to play to you. We just called, what, what, what, what, That's what it was for me. It was a style, you know, I was wearing my little, I was wearing my braids with my, with my, with my little pigtails and my beads and I was cute.

It does fuck me up that the style's coming back because like back in the back of the day, like two thousands, when people dress like that, we would be like, you were like a fucking goofball, you're a nerd, ass nerd. And now you see people wearing the same shit. And it's like, damn. Now you're just like, you're looking back at what like, was the most, what stands out the most. The most like, like a caricature of the time

or like almost like a parody of that time. If dudes could get Gene Cous right now, they would, they would be rocking them. That's the fancy back. Aren't they back? Yeah, I thought they were. You know, flare genes are also back. I've had to buy a few. No, you don't fancy back. Yeah, I thought they were. You know, Flare jeans are also back. I've had to buy a few.

No, you don't have to. I have so many pairs now. Not, I bought to myself. My mom has given me three that don't pair. So she, because I have it the gas, so she gave me hers. Um, and the problem with Flare jeans is that Flare jeans only work if you're tall enough. I'm not tall enough.

They're all, and I hated jeans that like glides against the Flore because now I'm not tall enough. And I hated Jean that glides against the floor because now I'm like the bottom of my jeans is dirty. And I'm just not tall enough and I don't wear heels enough. Let me tell you, it doesn't just work if you're tall enough. There's a few other factors that go into making them look good. I remember there's flat jeans and trousers. Like all the girls at my school would have all these, because it's wet in England.

It's disgusting and wet and puddles and everyone would have like the same brown like soggy stains halfway up their shins and it would always like kick mud and dirt like up their ass so every every girl at school would have the same like mud streaks up their ass. Are you sure it was mud? Maybe that was the secret. Yeah maybe they were shooting themselves. They could have been. Only cool kids flash specks. Only the kids. Only the cool kids. Only cool kids shit their gene codes.

In public too. Do you have a shit you pants at school? At school? No. Close but no. Have you? I feel like I would have said yes if I had gotten to college. Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Could you stick your head no before you said big time? Big time. Definitely. shout myself at school. Yeah, what age? Ah, probably six. Oh, that's nice fun. Yeah, one of the dinner ladies to wipe my eyes. Oh no. One of the what? Couldn't wipe your own ass?

I did, but I was like, I had to, apparently, was pretty distraught about it. And then I had to wear my like outdoor sweatpants in the class. You know this, you never forget the insure you're asked and the new today is probably completely different. I feel like that's just a life changing. I was pretty distraught about it. And then I had to wear my outdoor flat pants in the class. Yo, this is the universe where you can then show your ass and the new today is probably completely different. I feel like that's just a life changing. Oh, yes. Yeah, I wonder what the most insignificant seeming event

caused the biggest rift on my life path. You're comparing that to her. Your parents are starting to fuck. Yeah. One time was before you made it. Speaking of life paths, I'm playing this kind of new game on my stream called Breakout 13. It's very similar to until Dawn, in the sense of like,

it's a choose your own story adventure. But instead of it being like all gameplay, I'm watching a movie. And it's based in China. So I'm watching this movie about a reformatory school. And it's based on a true story. So that's scary. My black ass should've

existed again for me, since I saw that. But along the way, while he's interacting with these characters and there's a reformatory school, where he's clearly getting a booze, beat in, like mistreated, I will then come to a choice of being like, do you talk this man or do you beat his ass? Kind of thing. So it's like, you said, it's like,

and the way the story starts is it says, because this is based on your story, many people have actually lived this path, how would you have gone through it, kind of situation? And it's just me going through it, making all the wrong decisions. You can't people killed. I'm getting people put in the electric chair often.

Jesus, that is killing that. It's like an FMV game. Yes, it is. Oh my God, it's so good. It's so good. And then I guess it plays a different brand new video. It literally came out two days ago and I said, I need to play the hell out of this.

And every single time it's like, blood blood's a pinion of you has gone down. Blood blood has been in it. I mean, you're trying to play well, you're trying to get everyone killed. I'm so hard, Kevin. I love all those super massive games like until Dawn. Like, you see?

This looks- The quarry was fucking tight as hell. I love the quarry. It was so good. I still need to play the quarry. I think what's really fun about the quarry is I got everyone killed, but my express goal when I started the game was I was going to make the horniest decision ever. And in true horror movie fashion,

the hornie decision will make you dead. Yeah, yeah. This is really fucking, that's weird as hell. This thing, this game. It's real people acting everything out. And then you have to find clues so if you don't take the time to find all the clues, or to solve some decisions,

then you won't unlock some endings. find all the clues or to solve some decisions, then you won't get like unlocks some endings Sure, sometimes I'll come to a choice and because I didn't get information One of the options will be locked I came and take that path because I don't have the knowledge of it I want to start off by saying like I think generations are bullshit I think that for like a lot of them are used as advertising tools And also the way that they describe them are detrimental like a lot of them are used as advertising tools and also the way that they describe them are detrimental, like a lot of people said, Gen Z was going to save the world and save the economy,

but they put too much pressure on it and actually fuck the generation up. Like I think generations are stupid. That being said. That being said. Are you generation Z? I technically. Me too.

But I feel like I grew up not as Gen Z, but as a millennial only because I grew up so poor that everything that I got was my mom's old shit. And so like, oh, so you had like a hand me down generation. Like I played mist. I played like so much FMV bullshit. What did we play the other day? Contradiction, like there's so much of this old bullshit.

Like the FMV was such a huge part of my childhood. I played, what was that? Like something, something, it turns into a monkey island or something. Oh yeah, the secret of monkey island. Secret of monkey island. God damn. I, yeah, the secret of monkey island secret of monkey island. God damn. I When everyone else had a I didn't get my first iPod until the iPhone had been out for a while and while everyone else had iPods when I was a kid I had like a

Walkman like a CD player. I think I was 25 before I got my first iPod. Yeah, but when did the iPod come out when I was like 25? Yeah, I didn't have texting until I was like, like I had a phone, but I had a phone that only had a plan where I could make calls locally. So I couldn't send text messages until I was 17. No, it was like a straight up phone. Also it was a motor roller racing. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. It was my mom's old phone. Also, it was a motor roller racing. Oh, yeah, it was my mom's old phone. And then, yeah, eventually I got a smartphone in my senior year of high school.

Okay, I actually have a question. What do you consider to be the first smartphone? I don't know. It depends how you qualify it. I would say maybe like a blackberry. I'm thinking of blackberry, because I don't feel like every flip phone, you know, not only a flip phone, but the ones that had the keyboards on it, worst smartphones, I just felt like they had a keyboard. Like blackberry or side-picks?

Somewhere on there. Ooh, side-pickles. Side-pickles with a palm pilot. But palm pilot wasn't a phone necessarily. I don't remember, God, it's been so long. Pompilot started as an organizer. Yeah, but it couldn't, could the Pompilot like go online and should, I don't think,

cause you have to like sink all your shit, you have to put it in a cradle and sink it with your computer to get out of your contacts and your calendar and stuff. I would say the Blackberry, and I know a lot of people to this day that say, though Blackberry didn't have touch screens, so it's not a smart phone.

I'm like, to me, the smart phone started when phones could connect to the internet and download apps and Blackberry didn't have touch screens, so it's not a smartphone. I'm like, to me, the smartphone started when phones could connect to the internet and download apps and Blackberry had apps. Yeah. For me, I think the smartphone started when you could, the moment you could start getting pussy on the internet.

Yeah, once you can jerk it, look at it. Yeah. So you're talking like, post 2 p.m. using a phone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no smartphones in the morning. There's no smartphones in the morning. That's the first time you brought me the joke back. I just really like that. I just really like that. I just using a phone. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no smartphones in the morning. There's no smartphones in the morning. That's the first time you brought me the joke back. I just really like that.

I just really like that. I just really like that. I just really like that. And I just keep pulling that. It's a fun concept, right? No. 2 p.m. It's a policy before that's vagina. Yeah, before it too early, you like last 2 p.m. somewhere.

It is everywhere. It's pushing somewhere, guys. I was looking up Megan because you were talking about it. I haven't seen the movie yet Well, the thing I appreciate is I looked it up. It's an hour and forty minute long movie. Oh Like no need don't have that kind of long for a movie too like most of like hour 20 and hour Good now hour and a half. Oh dude. I love an hour and a half movie pray Hour and a half oh dude. I love an hour and a half movie pray Megan what else did I watch those an hour and a half? There's a new movie on Netflix. I was by kid Cody. Cutty. I don't remember this. Yes. That's animation movie an hour 20

I rewatched pop star the other day Which is a fucking great movie. I think people slug on it. It's one of my favorite comedy movies of all time And that's also like 95 minutes. Yeah, fucking hilarious. I know it's so good because the thing about movies is that before I just didn't, you know, people always ask you need to go to the bathroom, but I'm like, no, I'm grown. I don't need to go to the bathroom.

Every single movie nowadays, I really gotta make sure I piss before I go see it. Yeah, no, I'm not the least, you know. It's made by that as you, part of it is straight up, just you getting older by the way. I didn't drink coffee before I went and I'm part of that is you part of that is straight up just you getting older by the way I didn't drink coffee before I went and saw Avatar way of water so like this So this is over a three hour movie. Yeah, I don't want to have to get up and I legit but there were there was like two hours of time I could be during that movie. Do we go together? No, I went was that separate? I went because I went with squad team force

No, watch it. I didn't go then we watch it is a if you have to us. Did you go someone with gusty? Ones is definitely not well. Okay, the thing is is I went't go then. If you have to ask, did you go, someone with gusty ounces definitely not. Well, okay, the thing is, I went to go see Avatar Way of the Water and I did Way of the Vaporizer. I love it. I love it. There was a, I barbed and trev at one point like they smelled weed in the theater.

And I want to say it wasn't me, it was not me. I don't smoke or vape inside of theaters. But they assumed it was me, which is a good call. So apparently they turned around and all they saw was me with my sweater over my mouth going, but also we're in like the 40 experience of taking around. Like, what's spreading?

You're literally, you're no longer living life, life is living you. Like, you're being propelled through it. God. And I went down, I saw it at the Violet Crown. I waited, I didn't want to go, at that trip, because I didn't want to go to like a full pack theater. It was like right after it had come out.

I waited a couple weeks and I found a showing at the Violet Crown that was totally empty. So it was just me and my wife in the theater, which is the best way to watch it because it's in it's like oh you can talk Like you can say shit like you could like oh yeah, they had five ribs Yeah, run the movie back Yeah, it's like did they establish they can talk to the whales before this point or are they easy just talking? I think if you are the only people in a movie they should just give you the remote Just say I don't go over like 20 minutes.

Yeah, I was just, yeah, I'm sorry. I was looking at like airplane, for example, as like an hour 20 movie. That's perfect. That's such a good length for a movie, especially a movie of that. I thought you were talking about the real life of a movie we're living right now about the things being grounded.

No, they got, for airplanes, I love airplane, I watch that movie a ton over all the time I've been alive. But as I've gotten older, I look back at trivia about that movie. And one of the weird things to me is that they got the actual voice for the LAX announcer to do the curbside announcements for that movie.

And they got them arguing at the beginning of the movie. They tracked down the actual people who did the curbsbsite so it was like at first we started watching it it sounds like they're just filming at LAX and then it's like then they start saying things you would never hear in the curbsite announcement like that's like such a crazy attention to detail like a small thing. Yeah, it's like looking on the voice of Siri today or the voice of voice male or whatever. Yeah, they also made a point to cost a bunch of serious actors in coming roles like Leslie Nielsen wasn't a comedic actor at the time. Right, but he's launched his whole.

Fucking amazing. By the way, I don't know if I said this right, because I think I said it wrong. When I meant to say it was airplane is an hour and 20 minutes. Yeah, he says. Yeah, right? So that's what it is. 80 minutes? Yeah.

I thought I said two hours. No, no, no, no. I think so. I mean, time is also in the Nigma. What's two hours to you might feel like an eternity? Did me what I thought I said was a hundred and twenty minutes That would be too hard. Yeah, that's where I fucked up anyway. Yeah, I Did Leslie Nielsen is the shit as the shit one of my like like you said not didn't didn't intend to be a comedic actor

And it's just so good at it and I try to like emulate his delivery and have you seen the Compilations of him on various chat shows with his little fart? Yes. He was just squeezed his little fart thing in the middle of breakfast interviews. He is a fart machine that he would bring with him on Conan or the late night or whatever.

Stephen Colbert. Yeah, before Stephen Colbert. That you son of a bitch, Stephen Cole Bear. Fuck you. Anyway, yeah, so he would just, he would hit it out during the interview and then apologize for fucking me. It's crazy to me because I guess that was,

maybe my introduction to Leslie Neils. I had never seen any of his dramatic roles. I only knew him as that comedic actor between airplane and the naked gun series. Then I remember like later, going back and watching like an old sci-fi movie, me like, that's fucking Leslie Nielsen. Yeah, like, it's so strange.

Being completely serious. Right, like, in a like a dead pan super serious sci-fi role in like, so bizarre. Can I complain about something? Yeah, absolutely. On a podcast? You know, a FedEx, right? Yeah.

If I go into FedEx, it's a On a podcast? You know a FedEx, right? Yeah. If I go into FedEx, it's a building that says FedEx on the top. And I ship something. I ship. You put in a helly case. I ship my pants at school. Get my ass wiped. I ship something.

Like a given receipt has the tracking number running. I lose that receipt. I've shipped it with my account number for my company, right? But I've lost the receipt. And the people I said it to are like, wait, where's that thing? And I'm like, oh, let me get you the tracking number. I assume I can easily log in online to my account and see current shipments.

It's not in there. Oh, that's a bit weird. Must not have got in. Cool them up. Oh, it's not. Yeah, yeah. And they're like, oh, yeah, you need the paper. I'm like, well, can you just like see it under my,

surely you don't have to like some flat file system here. There's a database you know about, you know about my shipments. You know there was a package. Because I did it under my account number. In the, in the, in the system. That's how you paid for it. You put your account number on it.

Yeah, I use my credit card. So the definite number, but I lost the paper. There's a lot of things linked to you associated with the shipment. Yeah, but can they tell me what the shipping number was or the tracking number? No, absolutely not. But I want to know why though. Yeah, if you shipped it with your account, you think it would automatically be, I assume it's some ancient piece of technology. They would show it all the way to the top of customer service on the phone. And they were like, oh, because they thought I'd made the label myself. If I'd have done it on my account online and had it picked up or dropped it off,

that's what it's in there. If you have them do it at the store, they just have no record of that tracking number in relation to you. And I think it's utter madness. It's only a $48 billion company. That's $48 billion. Mm-hmm. I like that.

That's the worth of FedEx. I basically just want to know if that's actually a thing or whether they just lost, or they just had a glitch in my account. I bet that's a thing. I bet that they don't associate it just for, one, I assume they have like some old legacy system that it would slow down. So in the effort of maintaining speed they don't associate it and tie it, they just get it through

that way it gets delivered as quickly as possible. I was thinking, I mean right off the, I hate to take the side of FedEx because let me tell you, fuck FedEx. I hate them with a fucking burning passion. I only use USPS even when it's cheaper to ship their UPS or FedEx, but also, fuck USPS. I hate them. I hate them. It's a broken system. Anyway, I think it's got to be something with the fact that like storing that would take up so much server space for the amount that they would have to get for everyone who ships out.

But they see it, other methods. Or how about instead of being worth 48 billion, just be worth 40 billion. And then invest in storing that one line of text in all of- Yeah, because the thing is, it's in the system. It's not like that shipping is not, because it's going to go to its destination, right?

Right, and I'm not someone who- It doesn't matter if they can't get it to him, because they don't know which one it is. And I feel like someone who... Because as a matter of, they can't get it to him because they don't know which one it is. And I feel like I don't lose stuff a lot. I just didn't know it was important. If they were like, keep that bit of paper because we don't know that number. I would have been like, oh, it definitely went losing.

I just probably threw it somewhere because I assumed it was all in the day. I am so paranoid. I always take a photo of any shipping receipt. That's what I'm gonna do. I do that. I don't know if I'm gonna need this. Oh, how about this? Forget storing what stuff.

Just email it to me. Right. Yeah. Right there and then. Or have the guy in the store just be like, you want me to text it to you email? I mean, I was, because the thing I was gonna bring up to play devil's advocate was that.

Two devil's advocates here. Yes. Was that, you know, when you go into a store and buy something, that's technically the system when you buy something, they give you a receipt. If you come back with the receipt, you can still return it, but you can't return it for your exact amount if the price has changed,

because they don't have your receipt of it. Yeah, Gavin Devils Advocate, why'd you lose a receipt? I'm gonna play Gavin's advocate. Fuck him. That isn't it, that isn't it. It's not like companies aren't storing everything else about you. For example, just for Ss and Gs, I downloaded... That stands for Shirts and Kick.

That stands for Push and Kick. I didn't know my Gen Zs didn't know. I downloaded, you can request your data from companies. I thought, let's see what Netflix has on me. I mean, I expected a lot of it. It has a record of every single thing I've ever watched on Netflix. Which makes sense. The time I watched it.

That's weird. What I wasn't expecting was it has my IP location from every time I received an alert from the app. So anytime, anytime it was like, hey, check out Ozark season three. It has a record of me receiving that and where I was at the time. It also has every choice I made when I watched Band-a-Snatch. Oh, I forgot about Band-a-Snatch. That is like every single possible thing,

and that's spending that money on keeping that information. So if they could actually apply some of that to the actual information that I need in other companies. Netflix is $144 billion. That's why they keep all that line of text. I just checked and Netflix actually has the tracking number. You know when my family case is when I hit them up. It's like, yeah, I'm aware that all these companies have all this information. It's just, can you also track the use of the machine?

Why not make the information useful and available to the customer? There you go. That's because it's capital-sense. Real quick, guys, because I know you're about to end it. I'm about to wrap this up. We have a workshop too, though. I got one last thing.

And it's my birthday. And it's your birthday. And it's your birthday. And it's your birthday. What is it? The worth of companies. Watch this thing the other day about how the Doritos Locos Taco has been around

longer than the Confederacy was a thing. And so the Doritos Locos Taco, the argument was the Doritos Locos Taco has more bearing to have its own flag than the Confederacy has to have a flag. But I kept getting this like weird thing. Anytime I see shit like that, I wanna look up the numbers. And so I also looked up the fact that the Confederacy, if you even account for inflation, only at its richest only had about like $2.3 billion at its time of like, and that's adjusted. That's adjusted and a huge part of America at that time

uh the Doritos Locos taco within its first like eight months made one billion dollars and I haven't even adjusted because that's like 2012 months yeah uh and so I've realized that the Doritos Locos tacos has made like probably 19 billion dollars way more. That's a good talk about Taco Bell. No, not even Taco Bell. Just the Doritos Loco's taco is a like 19 to 20 billion dollar commodity. I want a new hat that just says, make America Doritos Loco's again.

Mad love. Mad love. And I bet they keep every time you order one. I absolutely guarantee that they do. Mad love Mad love and I bet they keep every time you ordered one I Absolutely guarantee that they do and I would give them that data. I love that. I love shit like that. Yeah But we're gonna wrap this up. We got it. We still do have a post show though But thanks for watching everybody. We'll see you guys live again next week. Bye everybody. Thanks for having me for me. Do you like apples? All right, examples. Together in Treppet hosts, Characombs, Characombs are free to deal with nothing to do with this

podcast. Analyze various unsolved and rooster teeth's cryptic podcast. F**k face. Call to action. Feel free to add something show premise specific but short. Listen to show name on Apple Spotify or wherever you get podcasts. It's f**k face, a podcast. Subscribe or no. You do yes? It's f*** face, a podcast. Subscribe or no. You do yes?