Rooster Teeth Podcast - Eric the Libertarian Gremlin - #716

Episode Date: August 31, 2022

Join Gus Sorola, Kayla Milton, Blaine Gibson and Drew Saplin as they talk about the post office, Chupie the Chupacabra, Ho Hey, D&D But a Libertarian, which celebrities are mean, and more on this week's RT Podcast. Sponsored by Backbone (http://playbackbone.com/ROOSTER), Better Help (http://Betterhelp.com/rooster), and Shady Rays (http://shadyrays.com + code ROOSTERTEETH). FIRST Member and need your Private RSS feed for this show? Go here: http://bit.ly/FIRSTRSS Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's time to put your pedal to the metal. From the twisted minds behind Deadpool and Zombieland, an executive producers, Will Arnett and Anthony Mackie comes the new Peacock original series, Twisted Metal, a high-oxane action comedy based on the classic video game series. Anthony Mackie stars as John Doe, a motor-mouthed outsider who must deliver a mysterious package across a post-apocalyptic wasteland.

If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnett, and Thomas Hayden Church, twisted metal, streaming now, only on peacock Hey everyone, it's the Rusteath podcast. I'm Gus. Oh, I'm Gus. I don't know who I am. That's Kayla. I'm Drew. And I'm Chupi the Chupacabra cat. What is that? It's some cat that Eric was showing me right before the podcast.

He lives in Austin. Oh really? Not a Chupacabra at all. It's a cool cat. He eats bread. I'm Blink Gibson. Sorry, podcast audio listeners. Man, it's been a while, but the US Post Office fucked me over again.

It's only a matter of time. Wait, how often does this happen? And you know you can get tape from them for free. I found out today. Okay, really quick though, before we go down this path, you'd know that you're gonna be stringing that line of, you know, should we abolish the USPS? Well, don't do it. You know, like, are we gonna be getting into this territory?

We're not worried the USPS, they provide a very vital. Gus, are you a libertarian, you just in town? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, was young, when I was younger, but then I grew compassion for other human beings and I stopped that. Yeah, unborn babies, now he's totally right. Yeah, you can criticize things without thinking they need to be dead, killed. Interesting. I've talked about this many times. The post office sucks at delivering mail in my house.

As a result, I have a post office box because now they don't have to even take it out of their building. I almost asked what you're address was. What you're address? Come down this and be right up. Yeah, that's where you at. Where you at?

Apart from Tony went. And so I got a PO box at the post office. That way they don't even have to leave their building. It's there. They just have to take it off the loading dock and put it in the box. And I was getting a, I ordered something online and the tracking said, it got delivered Saturday. And it got marked as delivered Saturday at like 5 p.m

I was like that's weird normally they put the delivery stuff out early It's weird that it got marked as delivered late in the day. I went down there check the peel box nothing in there I was like well that's dumb Checked it again on Sunday just to be safe nothing in there I was like okay, so I had to get up early today, cause I had to record black box down at nine this morning, so I had to get up early that way I could get already, go to the post office, got in line,

it's like fucking 20 people in line. Finally, the pio boxes, I thought you just go straight to it. Or is it like a big enough thing that doesn't fit in your pio box? I don't know, cause it was a lot. It was delivered, it was there a line, and it was empty. There's always a line, there's always a line, it's marked as delivered. Is there a line? And it was empty? There's always a line.

There's always a line. It's a post office. Is there still like, no, no, this was like inside to get a good account? You've got to think about all the services they offer. You know, you can get your passport with the USPS. You can get a USPS. It's great.

They can tell you they delivered something and not have it there. So I had my confirmation printed out and I go up there and I'm like, hey, this is marked as delivered, but it's not in my box I need my flush light. Where is it? That's why it was way too big to fit in the box and The guys like hold on let me go look and you like disappears into the back Uh-huh. They're like 30 seconds later. It comes back out with my package

Oh, here you go. We were short-staffed on Saturday, so they didn't put it in I was like, well, why was it Mark delivered then? They were just real busy. You can't do that. It's his steps. That's against the law. I was like, what is the point of marking it as delivered? You went back there. You knew exactly where it was,

because you just like went around the corner and then immediately came back. So did they had it Saturday when you went in initially? They must have, it must have been back there. They just didn't think to go and ask. They're not open on Saturday. Oh. You can go in and check your box for me to open your mail.

Like, that it needs to be a federal offense for the post office to say something was delivered and it wasn't. Right, that person deserves jail time. I need dark Brandon to come out here and do something about this. Oh, sorry. Can somebody explain dark Brandon? Yes, I know.

I don't know what dark Brandon is. Oh, is it the right meme? No, no. I think I got it. I think I understand. No, but you know the brand and thing, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's go brand and cause they're too bitch baby to say fuck. But also even now, sorry, really quick,

the left is now owning. Let's go brand it because the right things that we like to, right, we don't like, we don't like, we don't like biting. No, I don't like him. And the side real quick, we were at a art show in like somewhere in Texas. When we were walking around in the real life

of let's go Brandon signs, I was with a friend and she kept going, who is Brandon? And I kept being like, that's a really good joke. Yeah, I'm so funded that you are like playing, it's a bit, I get it. And we passed on and she was like, who is Brandon? I don't get it. And I was like, oh shit, this is so funny, Sam,

you're really committed to this bitch. Like I don't fucking know who Brandon is. Can somebody please explain this? I was like, oh shit, this is so funny, Sam, you're really committed to this bitch. Like, I don't fucking know who Brandon is. Can somebody please explain this? I was like, oh, I'm sorry. I thought, at each time I just kept laughing more and more things, she was like, really leaning into it. Okay, dark Brandon, the fuck. So dark Brandon is a leftist meme built off of that

because as we all, we all as people who voted for him did not want to vote for him. Sure. So any, any, any complaints we have, we're like, yeah, no, we know he sucks, but it was either that or your fascism. So what happened is when Joe Biden accidentally starts to do stuff that's good. Like leftist.

Yeah, then, then they're like, oh, that's dark Brandon. Oh, so like the other day he's doing socialism, that's dark Brandon. He's giving us our student money back, that's dark Brandon. The thing to that report of the other day, it's usually like when he's snarky about himself.

Yeah, he's the report of the other day where he was like, I don't know, does anybody get upset when tech billionaires get a bailout? That's dark brand. That's dark brand. That's dark brand. So what the White House quote tweeting, you know, when people took PPP loans

and didn't pay them back? Yeah, that made me hard. I love that. When I saw that, I was like, look, the right does this shit all the time. Right, there's no presence anymore. No one's, there's no civilized arguing anymore. Do that.

You know what, dark Brandon 2024. Dark Brandon, 24. Dark Brandon and Joe Biden are like Tuxedo, Mask and Momoroo from Sailor Moon. Yeah. And I know what that is now, because I'm binging Sailor Moon. It's great. No, you're absolutely correct.

Yeah. Have you watched the live action stuff I sent you yet? Yeah, so you showed me the live action stuff. It is... There's live action sandwich? Dude, it's rough. It was like a TV show from 2003, I think. Oh man.

It's like 60 frames per second. They did it before Peter Jackson. And it's like real bad, the costumes. Everyone looks fucking tired. It ran for how many seasons? Why? I think it only ran for how many seasons? Why? I think it ran for two seasons, but I think it was like 50 episodes or something.

50 episodes is not like a feature. And it's like, but it looks like it's shot on DV. Yeah. Absolutely. Please send this to me. It's fascinating. It's really, I think I saw that at the very first convention we ever went to for Rooster Teeth,

like they were screening it in one of the, like in one of the screening rooms. I was like, what the fuck is that? And then like one of the attendees like gave me a burn DVD with the shits. Is it better or worse than the Korman Fantastic Four? Like, the Roger Korman did like a, it's the very first one from the,

no, no, it's like from the 90s. And everybody's just in practical suits. It looks like the incredible Hulk from the 70s, but somehow worse. The thing looks paper mache and the final shot is I think Mr. and Mrs. Fantastic getting married or something, but they're driving off in a limousine and they have a practical Mr. Fantastic arm. Like very clearly the wires are poking out. He's waving goodbye. It's so awesome. The original MCU is fucking amazing. You look back at the Lou Ferragno Hulk.

They had a Thor appearance in there. There was like an old Captain America movie where he had like a clear shield and it just, it's just such dog shit. It's so cool. It's dog shit. It's so cool. No, it's just because it's like,

it's like, the things that you love now, the MCU, it's like the biggest franchise ever. They had it back in the 70s and 80s, but it's like, we had the MCU at home. A lot of the band decks. Yes, I had a good home. Have you watched Triple R yet? Yes, I finally did.

Thank God. Okay, I was gonna have to like sell you online. Is that how you say RRR? I say true, I don't know. It's probably R, I don't know. I say RRR. Okay. Man, that's the one.

Kayla? No. Oh, good. That's the, the volume of the... Tollywood movie one? Kayla? No. Oh, good. That's the, the volume of movie. Uh, Tollywood. Tollywood movie. It's insane. It's like, it's like, it's Tollywood.

It's just a different region. Oh, okay. But, uh, it's like a Marvel movie, except, musical, with historical figures. Does it have a gunnet? It's like, yeah, so yeah. It's like, someone made a movie, they're like, what if George Washington and Abraham Lincoln met

and they were bros and they fucked up the British? I love that. He did it. With like, historic figures from India. They did a Blinken Vampire Hunter a while ago. I feel like I was actually trying to figure out, and I'm gonna hear your take on this, what's the closest approximation to Western RIR?

The closest I could come was Mad Max Fury Road. Marvel movie. I would say any like, oh was Mad Max Fury Road. Marvel movie. I would say any, like, oh, Mad Max Fury Road maybe. Like, did I watch that movie the first time the other day? Oh, it's so good. It's first time. For the first time. No, no, just recently.

I have to offer the first time. Oh, okay. In a while. In a while. It's good. It's good. It's good. I got ahead of myself. You should watch it. We should watch it together, but it's going to set aside like an entire Saturday.

Yeah, it's just watch movies. For smack breaks. No, no, because for just that movie. Okay. And like my friend said, like the first 20 minutes, she was like, the first 20 minutes, you're gonna be like, I'm gonna turn it off. But stick with it.

And then it says, she was like, it's three hours. I was like, there's no way. I'm never gonna get through a three hour movie. And no, by the end of it, you're like, yeah! Yeah, yeah. It's got a Marvel actor in it. Really? The evil British guy is race, race Stevenson or something?

He played Punisher in Punisher War Zone when they rebooted it. And then he also played one of the Thor's dudes in the Thor movies. Also a bad guy. No, he's a good guy. Oh, Thor's dudes. Punisher, debatable.

Thor's dudes. Good guy, bad guy. Let's just say. That'll be the next type of Thor's dudes. Thor's dudes. Thorsuits. Good guy, bad guy. That was just safe. That'll be the next Tyka Thor, Thor's dudes. Thor's dudes. Thor's dudes. This is gone all thrills. What were you saying about the cat?

It's an Austin cat influencer, like Steve bread. It looks like a trooper cobra. Do you feel like this is Allison's first cat influencer or have we had another one? No, there's that cloned cat. Oh, you met him. Don't we have the ugly dog too? No, no. Which one? cat. Oh, you met him. Don't we have like the ugly dog too? No, no.

Which one? Like the weird one is like his tongue out? Yeah. That's not from off the other thing. Wait, is he the white little maltese or is he the one that won the fucked up dog award? Point is, we live in Atastopia where there are multiple dog influencers that are super famous.

Yeah, obviously. Dog and cat. I follow my favorite Instagram and TikToks are like the cute disabled animals and I just want to pour all my love into those guys because they're fucking adorable. Oh, it's that dog that screams. They live in Cedar Park. Walter, the screaming sound. Oh, yeah.

Walter the Frinchies from Cedar Park. He goes like, yeah, everybody remixes him. Yeah, yeah. He's great. I've never heard of his work, but I'll check it out after the show. The remix of his stuff is really good. He loves crying and complaining about stuff. Okay. Yeah.

It's like if Gus was a French bulldog. It's like if they delivered his stuff, but then didn't deliver it, and then you have to go talk to someone. Okay, but no Gus is right, because I went home for like two months. I did a mail freeze. They're not supposed to deliver the mail to my house. Why the fuck was the mail getting delivered to my house? But then also some of it wasn't getting delivered

to my house. And honestly, the stuff that was getting delivered was the stuff that I super didn't want getting delivered. And so then I go to the post office, that is a three blocks away from my house. And I wait in line for 25 minutes because there's always a fucking line. Of course.

And I get to the front and I say, hey, I put the freeze on my mail. Can I please have my mail please? And he was like, oh, we don't service this zip code. What do you mean you don't service this zip code? You're three blocks from your house. You're three blocks from my fucking house. He was like, yeah, no, this is the place you need to go.

And it's all the way down south. Oh, is that like some like Jerry Mandarin zoning? Oh yeah, you probably. He was way, yeah, no, this is the place you need to go. And it's all the way down south. It's like, it's like some like, Jerry Mandarin zoning. Oh, yeah, it's probably the fucking sound. It was way the fuck down south. Like I had to cross the river, it's stupid. So I get there and because it took so long to get there because of traffic, I walk in at like 445, they close at 5 p.m.

Oh, they hate you. There's a line. There's a line. No, there's a line. The woman, I go in, I wait in line at the normal line. I always wait in line because there's two lines. I get to the front and I'm like yeah, I had a package Rees my male package of the music. Oh actually, yeah, it's that line So then I had to go to the other line wait in that line

I was there until like 535 because she was only taking four people's names at the time And then she would go to the back and then she would come back and then she'd be like Jason are and then he'd come over and be like this this isn't all my mail and she'd be like, this is all that was back there. I got a notification and I had the package back there. I didn't see it. Okay, let's just that over and over and over again. I'm like, just the whole time.

Then I get to the, I am the, in the grouping, I was like the last person and she cut it off at me which made me more mad. So then you know, she takes care of that. I understand their overworked, it's not their fault, but they joy, fuck they joy. And then I get to the front, I get rid of my thing.

And I show her, okay, I get to the front. You're supposed to have a slip that's in the mailbox that tells you to come get your mail. My mail keeps getting stolen, which is why I stopped the mail. So I never had that slip because it got stolen when someone stole all the mail that was supposed to be frozen.

So I say, hey, I don't have that. And it was like, well, we can't do anything. Before this, when I tried to go online to find, to find, if I could get it, I put in the code for my thing, and they're like, we don't have them on record. So you made a hold, but it didn't exist. I go to the email that says, you have a hold.

Here it is for your records. I click on it, I copy it, I paste it in the thing, it takes me to, we don't know what this is. Yeah. Here's my pitch. You get a job at the post office, and then you get me a job at the post office, and we infiltrate the entire post office service

from the inside priority Gus and then everyone else and then every yeah in Gus we trust honestly I'm into it one time I went to go ahead I was gonna say there was a really interesting video about the USPS that Tom Scott put out like two weeks ago now I think where he visited an OCR well like he visited a center where people just sit in front of a computer and they look at scanned images of mail. It's like the mail that the OCR technology cannot figure out what the address is.

Oh. Oh. So it's like, is it handwriting so fucking that it's just Santa? Yeah. No, there's separate, like Santa gets handled separately. Synthes, handle, synthes, synthes, synthes. Synthes, synthes, synthes, like Santa gets handled separately. Sittigate, sandals, sandals. But this is like an actual piece of mail that needs to get delivered,

that the OCR technology cannot figure out what the letter says. So it has to flash in front of a human and they have to very quickly on like a modified keyboard type, like part of the street, part of the number, part of the city and the zip. Oh, and like, is like a coded way to type it quickly.

They're like code breakers for sloppy handwriting. And then it goes to the shelf, the robot lady is with the multi fingers. It's like a coded way to type it quick. They're like code breakers for Sloppy hand writing. And then go to the show, the robot ladies with the multi fingers, it looks that's. That's what this kind of a reminder you have. But what's fucked up he works. What's really happening in real time is, it's like say here in Austin, a piece of mail gets scanned, the machine doesn't know what it is.

So it stays on a belt circling in the system. It flashes up on the screen at this processing center. They type in what it is, and then here in Austin, it gets diverted to the correct place. Like it's not like it even gets pulled out of the system. It just enters in a holding pattern in the system until it gets clarified, and then it gets diverted on to continue going.

Back to Indonesia, as was my issue. Last time. Now I want to know what you got from Indonesia. A bunch of shirts. Word. Kayla's got like everything figured out. Am I allowed to tell them the easiest? Sure.

Yeah, she's got like Yeezies for $5. Yeah. How? You just buy directly from the warehouse. Yeah. Or you just find a dude in China who's like, yeah, obviously. So, okay, so this is what it is. Imagine you work for Adidas, the Adidas shoe place in China.

Right. Adidas is like, these are our shoes, the Adidas shoe place in China. Right. Adidas is like, these are our shoes, these are our patents, make them. So you do that, but then like after hours when they're not paying you, if you make more shoes, who cares? So here's the thing, because of patent loss, they can't sell any of that stuff outside of China. Okay. So what you have to do is you just find some guy in China and you just give him money

And then as a gift and then he goes and buys the exact thing that he told him to buy and then he's like Oh, do you want this I can give it to you for free as a gift and you're like, yeah, thank you I would like that and then they ship them to you and then you have one pair you have three pairs of Yeezy's for the price one Yeezy easy easy easy price one. Yeezy. Yeezy. Yeezy's made Yeezy. Last time. No, I know what you're thinking.

Oh, they're not, no. They're the exact, the exact one. With the logo and everything. Yeah, it's got the ultra boost souls. Like, it is simply a Yeezy. It's got the flash photography, like anti-poperazzi, from the perspective.

Yeah, they're like reflective. So like, how much research went into you finding so this man in China who definitely didn't get like who I'm sorry who gifted you. So there's a subreddit for this. Of course. And they post like places that they found stuff that was because sometimes it's bad quality. Sometimes it's fake. Got it. But they like sus through the people. I can't drop it. I'm not going to do that. No, you can. I can't do that. And then so you find it's like, but they like, so stupid people. I can't drop it. I'm not gonna do that. No, you can. I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna do that.

And then so you find it's like, oh, this buyer's record. Okay, wait, so then back up even further. How did you find out of the subreddit? Because this is where I get stuck. Anytime I want to start a new hobby. Why are you looking at me? Why are you looking at me?

I don't know, I don't know why she looked at me. That's not me. Kale is in the loop. But like anytime I start researching a new thing, if I go straight to the subreddit, I'm like, I don't fucking understand a word anybody's saying here. Like, I don't understand. I don't understand.

Well, I didn't understand shit that they were saying, but you learn as you go, because you just gotta, because it happened, because I was, you know when YouTube just keeps sending you shit, and it just like has the same video in your, like just watch it, just watch it, right? I'm fucking watch it, watch it. So I finally watched it,

and I watched like eight of his videos, and then the one was about like, the guy you bought the shoes from? No, no, no, just like, then this guy was like, this is a store by Uzi, this is one I got from China. Let's see if we can tell the difference. And then from there it was downhill.

But speaking of all that stuff, you should buy our merch store.rstg.com. Please don't go to a dude in China who will give it to you as a gift. New squad team forced, Smurch available now. Smurch, Smurch, Smurch. Smurch.

Last time I was at the USPS, there was a guy that was ahead of me. And he was like, hey, do you guys ship firearms? And then my ears kind of perked up. Do they? And they're like, yeah, you know, like we, whatever, like they're talking to me, he's like, yeah, it's like an older rifle.

And but it still works and like, how do you wanna do this? How do you wanna treat it? And they're like, well, do you have it on you? Oh, yeah, it's not my truck. And like, okay, well, once you go get that rifle and then I was just like, I wanna get this line as fast as possible.

So I went in and I did my stuff as quickly as I could and then I just like avoided that. He asked ahead of time. It's not the one you ever wore. He handled it well, but it also like, oh, impossible. So I went in and I did myself as quickly as I could and then I just like avoided that. He asked ahead of time. It's not the one you ever wanted. He handled it well, but it also like, white dude who seemed like he was very on the internet, I just didn't wanna be around with him and a gun. Just didn't know that.

That reminds me when I was at, when I was having fun at the post office this morning. One of the women in front of me went up, like little low lady, he was like, oh God, it's gonna take forever. Shipping a piss. And she showed up with like this envelope, but she's of course speaking very loudly to the guy at the counter. And she puts the envelope on the counter and says, I need to ship this to Slovakia. I'm like, okay, that's a weird thing. And the guy, you know, post-employee, like picks up the letter and it's got like a weird bump in it. And he's like, you know, touching and he goes, what's in here?

Throgs. And she says, it's a... Uranium. It's photos. I put them in a ziplock bag. So in my mind, I'm like, what the fuck is this lady doing? That's when you know this, the old woman makeup neck peeling just her collar.

And the sweat, the employee, the post-employee's like, I'm trying to figure out if you need a file, a customs declaration on this, because you normally, if it's not documents, you need to, so you can tell in his head, he's like going through the, whatever the regulations are. Then like, as if it helps, she's like, their photos of my daughter's graduation.

Oh my God, you're really cares. No, no, no, it wasn't. It was the most obvious. One, it doesn't matter. Two, why are you not emailing this? Why are you like, you print it out photos in the year 2020, right? Put them in a zip lock bag.

And you're, they don't get what, Gus? They're raising them to Slovakia. And the guys like, all right, it'll be there in two to three weeks, cost $3.90. She goes, and she's like, how much is it to send it faster than you like type? She's like, well, you can get it there in, you know,

less than a week, but it's a $39. And then she's like, yeah, the $4. That's fine. What's it like? It's going to my ex-husband. He can wait. You have so much of this lady story. Wow.

I feel like you have enough information to dox this lady. Absolutely. Yeah, we don't need to know all these things about your life. These are all irrelevant facts. You think that the most TMI moment ever perhaps was at a bank. Okay. Yeah, okay, go on.

Well, as far as a worst bank in the world, do not bank with them. I have to go with- This episode of the Vursi Possible. I'm not going to swear to God. Buffalo Fargo. I needed money to pay my rent, so I went in to get dollars to pay my rent.

That's how that works. And surprisingly, no line just two people in the front of me, but there's a woman sitting in the lobby and she's on the phone. And she's doing that, you know, like that Gen X thing where they're on the phone at the volume, they'd be on the phone at home. Yeah, I guess you know that thing. No, just like, I just like, hey, I'm at the bank,

can I call you back? Just like fully having a conversation. Hey, please fucking text me like a normal human being. Yeah, it's not that. So apparently the woman's dad father had just passed and it sound like she was talking to a friend or a sibling or cousin or something. I don't know. And she was on the phone and she was just like, yeah, no, yeah, no, we went up to the house. Yeah, no, we went up to the house.

Were those just supposed to? We had a bunch of stuff in the house. Nothing good. He got rid of all the good stuff. You know, he did have, yeah, no pornography, yeah, no Asian pornography. Yeah, why would he leave something like that for his dog to find? It's disgusting, where he's, me and my,

we had to go in there and clean up all of his pornography, all Asian. I don't know what the man was into, and I was just like, it's a man, it's a Tuesday. Man, we're at the world, we're at the world,'s a Tuesday. Man, we're at the world square. It would have been great if she was like, yeah, we had to watch it all. We had to watch it all.

We had to check it out. Yeah. Maybe there's home movies in there. I don't know. And then at one point, she says, he knows he was coming nearing the end. Why wouldn't he get rid of it before he died? I feel like if you have that much pornography in your house,

like if it's a couple of little barrels full and you're like, crap it out. You're shitting the bed, like, you're not gonna be able to transport that very car. It sounded like a lot. I feel like you got to build, like, you need to know that this is coming. If you're gonna run the risk of owning sex toys

pornography for your children to find, you need to have like, you know what movies when they're like, this is gonna go on the internet. If I don't type in this password, so if you kill me, the fail safe will activate and then it'll go out to everyone Oh god, you need one of those protocols. Yeah, so for when you guys like this dude just had like mags

No, it was like he was old guys. It was you know it's like magazine It wasn't like it wasn't like a Computer with a bunch of porn on it. This was physical media. Yeah order house Literally of porn. No, literally. Wow. I got another USB story. There was this one time where I had to mail my mom a check

with my phone bill because I was on the family plan. Yeah. And this is in college. And I sent her an envelope with the check. But because I'm a child, I wanted to send her like a Pokemon card, some quarters, a picture that I drew, a bunch of stupid bullshit. I was just like trying to be cute and make my mom smile.

And my handwriting's awful, awful awful. And apparently I put so much stuff in the envelope that it was too heavy to send. But the post office just let it clear because I think they were convinced. My mom said like they were convinced she was a child. Oh my god. They let it sit. They let it sit. And that's why the post office loses money. Yeah. Hey, that's why I support the post office. It's not supposed to make money. It is a it is a public service. Public service. Yeah. It's a fire department.

They do lose a phenomenal amount of money. That's more money. Please. Please. Why? I said the police. Oh, I thought you said blitz. No, I said the police, like in legal litigation. Sure. Like in legal litigation? Or, I mean, have you seen like the budget for LAPD's marketing department? Yeah, or militarization or propaganda?

But, Nana's. It's insane. What if we took some of that money in a tiny bit? I'm just throwing this out here and we like paved a road. Or, what if we built a, we could build a train or or like what if we just like, I think I think Eric's whatever, what if we just like, I don't know.

Oh, oh. Or like gave one teacher a pack of expo markers. That angle of Eric is my favorite because he looks like he's standing like really weird. Like he's like a little man. Yeah. Toddler arms the whole time. because he looks like he's standing really weird. Like he's like a little man. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Listen, we just need more fiscal oversight, all right? All right, figure it out. Figure it out. This episode of the RESTeed Podcast brought to you by Backbone.

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I want to meet that chupy, the chupy copper cast. That cat looked insane. Did you see that photo they had threw up just a minute ago? I noticed totally God. I wanted a detective mode, and they had a HEB wrapper on the tortillas, and I was like, that is Austin. Yeah, cool.

That's our parts. Did you know Dallas, you know this, doesn't have an H.E.B.? Well, my mom is getting one in Allen. Yeah, my parents. The closest one is that. I was driving back to Oklahoma this weekend to my parents' live.

And, uh, drove to Dallas. No, we can't say where, everything's a tiny ass town. H.E.B originally started in South Texas, right? So, like, Dallas is like as far away. Like, that's the other side of the world to them. That's up. They're getting them and West Texas

But yeah, take over I fuck Kruger. No, I didn't realize until recently how small and regional Randalls is. Yeah It's only often Houston get the fuck out. That's it There's so expensive and bad no no you're thinking of Safeway which owns Randalls. They're safeway, but there's also like there's so expensive and bad no no you're thinking of safe way which owns Randalls They're safe way, but there's also like there's another R1 Rochemarroch Yeah, it's Ralph's gonna call it Rochemarroch Welcome to Ron's here's a banana. I'm sorry stepdad

There are 32 Randalls Jesus I thought there was okay, but then it's safe way. It's just a safe right. It's just like a subsidiary safe way I didn't realize how good HEP was until I went to Massachusetts last year and Denver this year. Their grocery store is blood. What shit hole are you shopping at? Like Denver has this thing called King Super's,

and it was the name of the King Super's. I've been a King Super's. You think like, I'm high-faluten at the King Super's. No, devile. It's a repot Albertsons. Is it like a pigly wiggly? No. It's like an Ingalls. It's a, like, it's a repo to Albertsons. Is it like a pigly wiggly? No, it's like an Ingles. It's a step up from a pigly wiggly.

So an Ingles. Yeah, my favorite thing is regional stores because my girlfriend was telling me about what was in Orlando. Yes, and she said, in a whole like public, we got to go to PDQ's, Wawa's and Huey McGoos.

Where's your girlfriend? And I was like, you're fucking Huey McGoos. I said, you're fucking why. Where's this? Where am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?

Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?

Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? She's fucking lying. No, it's not real. She made that website. She bought it. Goedaddy or whatever. Wait, have you had a, have you had a public's chicken tender sandwich yet? Public's is like my beach grocery store. Okay. Tell me where it is in the beach. The only grocery store to rival

H.E.B. would be public's due to their sandwich. It's been in his hell though. They've got a, sure, they got those like dipped pretzels, sweet dip pretzels. Probably so good. There's nothing than, every time I go home, I touch down, I hit land. It touch grass. It touch grass. If it is daylight, I'm like, Mom, can we go to the publics? Oh, y'all got publics where we got?

Yeah, Georgia. Yeah, I get the fucking, I've never had better store chicken. Like, it's the best. Like, like, rotisserie or what? They got rotisserie, they have wings, they have like, deep fried wings, they got the chicken sandwich. HB does do deep fried anymore. In that nuts, there's not wings, they have like deep fried wings, they got a chicken sandwich. HB doesn't do deep fried anymore.

In that nuts, there's not an HB that does deep fried chicken, like deep fried chicken. Fried chicken. Deep fried chicken. They got the cafe. But that's the newer cafe in the world. They got the HB. They got the HB. You can't go to the HB hot bar and be like, hey, give me a pound of fried chicken.

That's what they do. Deep fried chicken. Love pungers. Remember the old, like the deli at that one, they have like the old the foods. Now it's all like in the containers. It's still good. They're trying to like model after a trader chose.

They're trying to get a trader chose. Oh, is that what they're doing? Which I was thinking the other day, because we do Hello Fresh. And I don't know what this show's sponsored by, but sorry if it's Blue Apron. None of those. Great, thank God.

But we do Hello Fresh. And I was like, man, if H.E.B. did like a Hello Fresh, the game fucking over for me. Oh yeah. I never leave, fresh. And I was like, man, if HB did like a Hello, fresh, the game fucking over. Oh, yeah. I never leave my house. Is this door delivery? Full hermit. Yeah, but just like, you know, like, I have to do a whole head of cabbage. That's the combo look. Oh, oh, they've done that before. Like, you can buy, they sometimes sell, depending on the time of year, they'll sell like combinations that they wrap up. If you want to make your own like, Caldo, like your own Mexican. Oh,

yeah, yeah. Where it's like everything all wrapped up in one package. Yeah, like it's the same kind of do caldo packs HB has a really good queso where it's like they give you all of the little ingredients and then you just The point is like when you're cooking out barbecue or hamburgers You just put it on the grill next to your shit and then it all melts and then you just mix it together The best queso. I do want to rewind for a second Yeah, because I was in Denver last year and I do wanna rewind for a second. Yeah. Because I was in Denver last year and I went to a King Super.

Okay. And the dumbest thing about King Super's is that it's not King SUP ERS. No, no. It's King SOP ERS. No. SOP. SOP ER apostrophe S. King Super.

King Super. Is that a little, is that a little work? King Kupas. My, where, you can help me spot this. help me spot this have you ever been to a quick stop I think it might be an Oklahoma chain Come and go. Yeah, we had a you in a common go across the street from my high school Which is in the city of I'm not going to say The town is too small, but a weird thing is that you have family in that town too. Yes

Yeah, that's why we were like fast friends. And then like, actually, when me and Blaine met, I went to high school with his cousin, Joe. And then I was like, Oh, I remember Joe, we both had theater together. And I was like, Blaine, ask Joe about me. And he goes, I have no idea who that is. Cool. So cool.

So Joe Gibson, if you listen to the podcast, go fuck yourself. I'm sorry about Joe but I'm not allowed to say. He's like, he's like a government dude for at one point. And yeah, but in your mind, never mind. I just remember that. Here's my only Joe Gibson memory. He had to do like a dramatic interpretation or a humorous interp for drama class. And for your minds, gays of what Joe looks like,

just imagine me, but squatter and a little bit heavier. Yeah, continue. And so he had to sit in a giant chair. OK. And so he just looks, I just remember seeing this, a grown-ass man, he's like 18, but his little feet were kicked out, and he was just in a giant chair doing this dramatic interpretation. It's the only Joe memory I have.

That, and you played the tuba. You played the tuba, that's right. Yeah, that means. What? What does that mean? Oh, we're not there. Oh yeah, so we got hate crime, do you want to know? When Blizz got hate crime.

What? We can't say who did it. I'm not gonna say who did it, but Blizz was having dinner with someone. Someone that's this very company. Someone who could be in this room, right at this moment. Just instead of a murder mystery party,

it's just somebody hate crime party. And he was like, he was in blizzes bisexual. Sure. Blizzes was like talking about himself. And he said something, something I played the tuba. And that guy was just like, oh, so you're like really good at blue jobs then. And it's like, how is that correlated?

He didn't say rimming. He said blue jobs. That's two different skills. How do you like, how do you play the tubas? Maybe I'm picture and get wrong. You're a perched shirt with. Yeah, that's what I thought.

But also, I was a mad, I didn't play it. I did it correctly. I did it fucking correctly. I was in percussion. I sat next to those motherfuckers all the time. I next to Joe Gibson doesn't remember. I am I know how to play the tuba Eric Would that be a good or bad blowjob? I thought blow jobs were you blew on a penis until I was like 14 I think that guy

I think so too if you want to give if you want to give raspberries to a direction sure I'm gonna do a You grab the foreskid and you blow it like a hot air blue I was imagining you grabbed the foreskin and you blow it like a hot air balloon. But see, he's like, here's the question. I've always been too afraid to ask, okay? What? If a blow job is, you blow into a penis,

does the penis inflate at all? Like, the foreskin, the foreskin, the foreskin. No, your bladder does. Does your bladder, the dick itself? I just, if you do a riding question before the public, I've always been too afraid to ask. I don't, no. I think the foreskin thing has some legs. Oh, I had it's a problem. I've always been to a free desk. I don't think, no. I think the first thing has some legs.

Oh, I had a terrifying question that I thought of today. What? If you could die for 20 minutes, and there was a 99% like there was a procedure, it was like, we're going to kill you and know what it's like to die. Flatliner. Flatliner situation. Yes.

99% chance that you come back. Yes. Yes. No. I'm doing's the what's the million dollars? But like there's a million dollars, but it's just like you get to figure out like I'm terrible. I'm terrified of dying I'm in it. It's like the one son. We'll kill you and then you can come back and it will be fine I couldn't do that to my partner in our No, but you come back You come back 99% chance 20 minutes 29. I'm doing it

It changes flat liners club. Let's go You gotta do it. You have to do it one time just to get it out of your seat It's like sky I'm gonna do it one time to get it out of my system and it's at the very There's no coming back from I'm not doing it twice. It wasn't done, baby You do it you do it you fly this on till you knock on Drake's door and it's like yellow. I don't think so. What? You'll like what have itself? It's got the John snow procedure.

That's a terrible. What if you find out something you don't want? Then you tell the world how you know. You told the world. Yeah. Flatlanders Club. I'm all about it. Yeah.

It's like a twisted version of Bird Box. Like you're going around trying to convince everyone to like open their eyes or die for 20 minutes. Yeah. Hey, just die for 20 minutes. Man, that movie. Bird Box? I haven't thought about that in a while.

Yeah, yeah. I see about 4C people's eyes open. Oh, I thought we were talking about the Slanzra Bullock. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's the movie. Oh, I thought we were talking about the slanger bullock. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Which is where that guy grabs the... Look at the Daniel. Yeah, you got bird box.

So in chat, coffee break, wanted me to remind you, you thought I was talking about the free tape? The free tape. Oh, from USPS. Oh, yeah, I saw it on TikTok today. So I believe it's USPS, and I get them all confused. But you can go get you

Should be like give me the tape and they'll give you like a thick ass roll of like scotch tape for free Yeah, USPS like we bought Maybe it's you P.S. I'll send you the tiktok us. Yeah, it was stupid But there's a lot but the tiktok was sure that's real it was like this It was like, this dude was like, hey guys, don't forget, you can go get free tape from this company that sells mailing things. And he had like eight rolls, and then it was like, factor cap, and then some guy was like, yeah, I went, here's my roll.

And they're like, they're like thick-ass rolls. Yeah, it's a full roll, is it? There's a phone number you can call to order it. Let's do it. Oh, did you find the free tape? Right now, I did. Or did it right now. You can get that with your COVID tests.

I want a resource with all of the free COVID tests. Tape, like all the free things that you are eligible to get. Yeah, I want any. There's a subreddit for that. But Caleb won't tell us what it is. Oh, no, no, no. I want anything that the government gives out for free, but they don't want you to know even though you're

paying for it. Are you calling them right now to see if you can get the tape? It's after, is it Eastern time? It's Eastern time. It's like, what? It's like 4.30. It's 8 a.m. right now, Eastern if you can get the tape. It's after, is it Eastern time? It's Eastern time. It's like what? It's like 4.30, it's 8 a.m. right now. I don't even know when you're. Do you hear our privacy policy?

That's true. Yeah, do. Do go. privacy policy. Oh, yeah, tape. You're going to be on there forever. Yeah, you're right. I mean, 20 seconds in, I don't have tape yet.

We have the best UPS buyer office, and I had a really funny experience there. She's an agent, is that so? Go, okay, no, I hope they go. There was these dudes who were shipping, it was like a toilet or like a machine part. It was very heavy and very large and they put it on a pallet

and you can tell that they put a lot of effort into packing it and taping it and making security to the pallet. And they bring it in and there's a lady working at the UPS. And she's like going through and they're trying to explain, it's the kind of mansplain what's going on with it and stuff like that. Do I just show this thing into their ex and Slovakia? Yeah, no, they're sending to Slovakia.

And she's looking at it and like they're doing all this explanation stuff and it's kind of already weird because of that like thing going on. And then she just says, uh, yeah, we can't take that because the palette is upside down So like the forklift goes in like this and you you did it wrong and then they're they're both just sitting there just like Yeah Like I don't care about like 105 Whether and then they had to like carry it out repack at their house and breathe out It was the best like moment. Oh

That's much of a huge fuck up It's like step one put the palette right side. Yep, and they they Yeah, it was rough to watch brutal skip stuff five Skip what's up? If you fuck up step one just skip stuff five Move this bag. Go giant I think it's skip self five. It's good. Oh, it is ACL. You guys are going to ACL? Is it ACL time? Like in a month and a half.

A month and a half. I got spoiled when I was very young because I got to work ACL and you never go back because they have like a food court and they put you on a golf cart and then you get to the side stage for everything and it's like, and then you get paid twice for flaming lips. Fucking awesome. That is the most off brand band that came out of your mouth.

That's the most one brand for me. No, what? No. Yeah, no, I don't do modernists like that. I was just going because it just happened to be like, hey, we're going to this thing, we have an extra ticket come with us and was like, okay, both times it just happened to be like, hey, we're going to this thing, we haven't actually taken it, come with us and was like, okay, both times it just happened to be flaming lips.

And I was just, you're not like a big flaming lips head. Not at all. Was it better or worse than the luminous concert? Then the what concert? Luminous. Did you go to the luminous? I mean, that's way more on brand for you.

I'm like, my sister and I live my brother-in-law. And they've been to luminous. Did you get one of those big hats? What's the big broad hats? What's the big broad hats? No. No. They love the luminaires.

They have like each album that the luminaires put out correlates with the child that they've given birth to. And like, if it's me. They have, whenever they go to the hospital to deliver a baby, apparently you can choose your playlist. Sure. And each time they've chosen a different luminars album to represent the different child.

Okay. So like big, luminier heads. So what's your favorite luminars song? The one where they go, hey! Hey! Help! Help! Hey!

The joke is that's every luminars song. Right. They literally have a song called, hey ho. Hey Ho. I was just sitting there, but my sister and brother-in-law had a fucking blast here. Here's the thing, Kristen, what's wrong? I've started to get to the point of my life where the phrase

that I use is like embrace the chug, but it's like something's chuggy, and we're just gonna go do it. We'll speed ahead. Yeah, like we went ax throwing the other day, and it was like, uh, no, it's fun as fuck. Cause you throw some axes, it was chuggy.

It's, there's a dude, and he gives you a long spiel about how you do it. And it's comfortable with this as fuck, and he's, and he's got these jokes that he said a fucking thousand times, but you just go with it. Just go with it. You have to go to luminaires concert, you like your lighter and go,

hey, hey, the song is called, oh hey, not the, oh, excuse me. Oh, excuse me. Just go with it. You have to go to Luminier's concert, you like your letter and you go, Hey, the song is called, Oh, hey, not hey. Oh, it's guys, excuse me. I want to close up on me. I want to apologize. Zoom it, no, punch it, punch it. I want to apologize to all the Luminier heads out there. Punch it.

We're gonna have a serious song. We're gonna have a serious song. There was a part where the lead guy had the fucking crowd in the palm of his hand. And he's telling the story who's like, I remember me and my wife going cross country in all of a and I don't know if this is always on. What is he talking about?

And it was a dark night. One of those nights where it's snowing and it's raining at the same time. And then our cough flipped over. And we're sitting there and the people come up from the road and they say they crying because they think they see people die But it's just us like two ghosts smoking cigarettes joking all cut up and bloodied from the wreck And that's when I knew that I was gonna write this next next song and my girlfriend and I are like, what the fuck is happening? Oh, what's happening?

In the middle of that, my girlfriend looks to me. She's like, it's sweet, it's snow and it's rain and my girlfriend's like, that's sweet. But the audience is like, so poetic. Oh, hey. Speaking of the luminars, I went home this weekend to Tulsa, which I assume is the biggest luminaires population

fanbase ever. But Tulsa is the place you should live in your mid-30s, because no one lives there. They have all the infrastructure for a city. Is it lockable? It's not lockable at all, but there's no lines for anything and you can just zip around. Like, I was pleasantly surprised.

We went to a museum, we went to an escape room. It's 2015 in Tulsa, the dream is alive. I'm still here. I'm still here. It's joke from before the show. I've been in Tulsa in years. My daddy's to coach there. I went to Oklahoma City because I went to the Oklahoma City

bombing museum. Yeah, the giggle was not necessary. It's told to the place from Watchmen. Yeah. Oh, shit, it is. Yeah, they just figured that out. The Tulsa people just, they didn't know. No, they didn't, they didn't know.

They didn't know about having for reals. So for some reason that didn't get mentioned in the history of all. Well, to the people in Philadelphia not know about the bombing. And most of America doesn't know about that. So the Philadelphia thing at least had a book about it in the 80s. Like there was a book about it.

With the Tulsa thing, nobody told us and then we got out of high school and was like, I'm sorry. What? That's crazy. And then it was like, go tell some people now that you know and you go tell people. And like I told two or three people about it was like, hey, watchman is all about alternate history. But that race, that massacre, that one, that that race massacre. That one part, that's not, that really happened.

That one worst part? Yeah, that was a real thing. And down to the airplane, like, all of that shit was real. And it was like, that's not alternate history. And it was like, wait, what? It's like, no, no, that happened, like, down the fucking street. So, it's like the opposite, that's the opposite of Georgia. In Georgia, in Georgia, they lean into the Georgia history.

Sure. Like, we had a whole chapter about like the revitalization of the KKK, and how they like, in like, in Georgia they lean into the Georgia history. Like we had a whole chapter about like the revitalization of the KKK and how they like, in like Stone Mountain, everyone's heard of Stone Mountain, that's a KKK Confederate monument. Like it's literally one of the biggest tourist attractions. That's where the KKK three dudes went back up there, the triumphant of evil, they met and they shook hands

and they're like, let's restart the KKK again. And that's in our textbooks and they let us know that but they don't tell us it's bad. But you don't kill them. What if we heard the other side story? The other side of the story is like lynching. Cut. Okay. Which side do you like more?

Sounds like something Eric the libertarian grimlin' would say. Eric's like it's my right is an American to take another American's life if I team if he's a wife. Why do you look like that? Why is the air? I really want to learn third. I just want like to zip on every time. How signing libertarian to grandma. You're very talkative. Oh, look at the Lord of the Rings.

Just stay on talking to the... And these are Libertarians. They're all Libertarians. That's what the new Amazon Prime prequels about, right? Libertarian. Libertarians. Yeah. God.

Oh, Libertarians. Smeagable. Smeagable. Libertarian. Grimland. That's why he doesn't want to share the ring. It's his ring. Yeah, he worked for it. Yeah, find his keepers

Pulled himself up by his bootstraps and he got he earned that ring Too hard work and then fucking billbo comes by looking for a hand out for handout Typical hobby states rights States rights. A flying libertarianism to things like high fantasy. No, but like the whole thing is camaraderie and working together to overcome a great no, just imagining. No, I'm going to pull yourself up my roots. Yeah, you have, you imagine having one libertarian in your adventuring party and every time it's come to split the horities like well, okay

No, because I'm the one who maintained everyone's weapons We have to do I want this I want to play this This is so good. It's everyone pulling in the same chair right here. It's like, what is that? It's like, for one secret. We want to see, and they know that you're supposed to hide it for as long as you can.

Secret, libertarian. For the libertarian. Secret. And it's like, I don't know. He smokes weed, but he has some weird stuff about taxes. It's like he doesn't believe in the monarchy, but he also believes in like in the authoritarian state. So I don't know. I'm into this.

I didn't teach you in high school who was a libertarian. I made it known in a way that like I didn't think it was legal in Texas. But he had a framed picture of Ronald Reagan behind his desk. Ill. Ill. Yeah. Ill. I learned a lot about Reagan these days. Right. I feel like. I saw a thing that it was like,

if you don't like something, it's probably Ronald Reagan's fault. Yeah. And it. No, it is. 100%. It's true that it's Reagan or Nixon. Right.

Those are the two, those are the two things that were pivotal. Like if that domino meme, that tiny one is like Reagan and Nixon. And then this one's just like, I don't know, fascism and the rest. Like it's literally everything. It's like, damn, how come I can't afford a house

on like two-person income, and like my parents got a house for like a nickel? And it's like Reagan, it's because before Reagan, like when companies made a lot of money, they had to give it to their employees, but now that they can do tax buybacks, they give it to their CEO so they can buy yachts and boats. The only thing more fun about American drink.

The only thing more fun in learning about Ronald Reagan is learning about Nancy Reagan. What is the story about Nancy Reagan? You know that Ronald Reagan was like a, you know, be list actor in Hollywood. Right, right. So they were in the Hollywood crowd. So they were in the Hollywood crowd. So many good movies with chimps.

Sure, okay. She were in the Hollywood crowd. Got it. A bunch of liberal lefty commies. Right. Yeah, so, so you know, they did some liberal lefty commie shit in Nancy Reagan. She just had a reputation about town as being like.

Really good objez. Yeah. Very good. She sucks the best dick. This side of the Mississippi and below the Mason Dixon. Who knew Nancy Reagan could play the tube of that one? Oh, man. Concert level. Yeah.

Oh, God. She did. Yeah, yeah, long dead. Have a like Jimmy Carter still alive. Yeah, Jimmy Carter is tangentially the blame because he was the one who lost the election that then gave us right again. So, so Ronald Reagan was in a movie with a monkey.

Yeah. And the movie was called Bedtime for Bonzo. And that monkey almost strangled him on set. If only he'd finished the job. Ah, ah two people I hate that monkey and Abbott's tree So I guess the monkey was interested in Ronald Reagan's tie and started pulling on it and Ronald Reagan started trying to pull away and it just Oh, here we go And then they had to cut the tie off because it had gotten so tight around this rack. Yeah, there was no week-to-week on tie.

Yeah, watch, nope. Yeah, it's everyone seen. I had a full-blown panic attack. I did too. I was like, oops, I got a look at the floor for a little bit. I can't breathe. I finally watched it. Chemicals help with that, or was it just you just, you know?

Not, I was just like hanging out. It was IMAX and then that chimpsine happened and I went, oh, my heart's gonna explode. I finally watched it this past weekend, because now you can rent it and watch it. Okay, it was good. I loved it. Well, for people who don't know Drew, you're probably the most learned

in film industry stuff. Like you've had the most IMDB credits or whatever the fuck. So that would, when I met you, you were a second, no, your assistant director on MDB. And that was like, you would have been responsible for the chimp that killed those people. Sure. It was a lot of that.

It was also just like, yeah. Like just, you vet that chimp. Right, just knowing how, yeah, it was just a lot. Oh, and then that's how really weird thing. I got to think you'll appreciate this. The aliens in, nope, which the children that were the aliens. The boiler. Not really, they're just,

they just cost you. Sure, I guess it's a spoiler or whatever. But the bottom of their costume looks like a chimp, and at the top of their costume, I thought it looked like those barn owls, like the aliens. And it's not, and somebody made the connection the other day, it was like, if you look at the film cameras in the studio and the chimp attacks. They're these big white things with like the two

And they look exactly like the film cameras that are being shot So it's like the head of the camera on the body of a monkey. He does a bunch of weird Subtext I didn't learn about the shoe yet either. There's a 18-minute YouTube video But I haven't watched it. It's just like standing on it's and there were a couple of one very obvious there were a couple of like I thought very okay I put a couple anime references in that film. Oh yeah of course he was gonna direct the American to cure. Oh really I don't know that. that would have been good. Mmm. That would have been good. I'm glad you can do it. I can't think you can do you can't do There's some things you can't think you would have been good. You are not able to Adapt and I think a cure is one of them. Yeah, and people have said that about lots of properties over the years

What is it how did it turn out for them? I will say Confederacy adunces everybody said it was a curse production and they've tried to make it a few times And they never were able to and always the lead actor of Confederacy have doneses. Everybody said it was a curse production and they've tried to make it a few times. And they never were able to. And always the lead actor of Confederacy had done it's always died. It was like John Belushi and then it was like, it just went through a bunch of people. Oh fuck.

But they were gonna cast Zach Alfinakis in it. And then instead they made baskets. And if you've ever read Confederacy of Dances and watched baskets, you realize like that show and that book are the same universe. Like they just took it and made a show out of that. We had an interesting conversation earlier. This is my new favorite thing.

It's movies that were spiritual successors, spiritual successors or unofficial sequels to other movies. So like, oh God, what is it? It's like the example I gave was, my blue heaven is a sequel to Goodfellas. Okay, sure. There was the conversation and any of the state uh... it's gene hackney heaven both times right and he has the same mannerisms there's another one it was uh... it was a robber redford flick is

something three days of the con doorknton doorknton doorknton doorknton spy games oh my god there's so many i went on a like a uh... so fucking the one the one thing I always want to know is, I've always wanted, I only know of two movies that do this, but a reply to another film, made like a movie that you make that is a reply to somebody else's film.

And the only example I have of this is, lost in translation. Okay. Her. So like, Scarlett Johansson is the lead in both of those and it's Spike Jones breaking up with a foot like this person that he's talking about on the phone that's really far away. And so it's like, oh, that's a reply to that movie.

There are two movies that in this spirit that I feel are very similar, but have very different approaches. And I love, these are two of my favorite movies all the time. One of them is Rushmore and the other one is Ghost World. I feel like Ghost 2 movies run very parallel to each other. Yes. They're both absolutely excellent. I think they complement each other very well. Also, Royal Tenenbombs is so everybody's like you can't adapt. Everybody's wanted

to adapt to Ketchar and the Rye Forever and you can't do it. But, right. No interest. No thanks. No thanks. But, no interest, thanks. But, why do you bully? JD Salinger, other JD Salinger books, have been adapted. World Ten of Boms is the glass of your literature person. The glass family from that whole universe is the World Ten of Boms. And basically, Wes Anderson, I was like, watching it,

and I was like, wait, she's in the tub, and she gets out of the thing, and I was like, that's Franian Zoe. And then I got the book about the World Ten of Boms, and was like, what's Anderson's main influence was Franian Zoe? I was like, I's Franian Zoe. And then I got the book about the world's 10 of bombs. I was like, what's Anderson's main influence was Franian Zoe? And I was like, I did it. So that's, I love that because then you can imagine

what an adaptation of Ketcher and the Rye would be like, just based off of the tone and all that. I'll argue until the end of time. If you read Ketcher and the Rye as an adult, you realize, it's not, like when you read it as a kid, you're like, oh, he's misunderstood. I'm out of the blue. When you read as an adult, you realize, it's a man in his like 30s,

writing about how dumb it is to be a teenager, how stupid teens are. And it's just like, that's my favorite thing. It'd be like, it'd be like Gus writing a YA novel. I hated capturing the eye read when I was 16. And I was like, this is fucking terrible. It's just some dude, it's just like, it's like, can we put him on some Lexi Pro or something like I shouldn't say it was terrible

It was just like I didn't see the appeal of it So no val jonsense is the same place officer and ghost busters die hard and family matters That's connected universe though, so someone also said one and I don't know if this is a joke or not the expanse to sequel to the Martian No, I don't think officially I I don't think officially I got up to the final season and I was again gust sent me something there's like a tell tale tell tale game. Yeah, they're making an expense. Yeah, of what's your name, drummer, drummer, who's like the fuck best girl. And I asked if I should watch the final season, Gus is like, don't bother.

Yeah, I did not end on the best note. Yeah, sorry if that was... No, no, leave it, leave it good in your mind. Leave it here. I just, I'm waiting, it's in the mail right now. I bought Hyperia. Oh, dude, I was gonna ask you about this. I just bought it and I'm through chapters like three.

It's the fucking best. You're gonna love it. Do you go to a book club? Can you stop reading it so I can catch up? Yes, yes. Dude, I think that they're gonna try to do, apparently Bradley Cooper signed on with Warner Brothers after they saw that Dune was like a success.

Ben? Yeah. They're like, hey, yeah, let's do Hyperion. Unadaptable. They'll never, like only, you know, and if they did like HBO Max a TV series at the scale of... Sorry. Sorry. I don't know if you know this but Zazzle doesn't like Lucy.

He said it in the middle of the day. He's behind camera six. I'm curious. It sounds like a code name for a tax ride off. Yeah, they're going to green light it. Matt and Jordan, I'm not a part of this. I'm not a part of this. Unadaptable.

It's so fucking cool and so big. There's a no-way. Yeah, I'm so excited. It's in the mail. So it's cool. Okay, good. Oh, it's so, it's a problem. Do you know what this?

Hyperion? No. It's a sci-fi book. Apparently TikTok figured it out. And then on TikTok, it's my number one sci-fi book. Oh, fuck, we have the same. Yeah, we have the same. Why?

It's Canterbury Tales in space. I love the camp too. Yeah, we had the same. Why? It's Canterbury Tales in space. I love the camp too. Yeah, they're basically, it's like, I'm gonna keep it vague. There's several people on a pilgrimage to a planet that sounds fucked and there's like a big monster there that's fucked and there's like time things that are fucked and then a war on the brink of war

and you're hearing all the stories of the people on their journey there and it's fucked and it's so cool. Excited. Excited to read it. There was a, sorry to circle back for a second. In Chattafry, who was someone said, and I've read this, oh, Cyclone 1 and 7 said that,

have you seen those fan theories about how Sean Connery's character in the rock is retired James Bond? That was another great one. That's a great one. Oh, that's a solid one. Yeah. It makes perfect sense. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Do you ever hear people making the connection of event horizon to doom and then other people saying the actual connection is event horizon to war hammer 40k. Oh, I'm not very interested. Very interesting. I'm not familiar with Warhammer.

Warhammers. But like, it's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right?

It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right?

It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? It's the game right? but it's got a whole expanded universe and Henry Cavill will come out with something that's how he says it. Okay, I'll say Cavill. Henry C is gonna probably bring it to, in the same way that the rock brought black Adam, Henry Cavill C is like, he's like a really big guy,

and I think he's a big enough name in Hollywood that he's gonna make it happen. Okay. It's fucking crazy, like brutal shit. People that are like live for millennia, but it's like a horrible life and you could die Do you think Henry Cavill? Kavill is really into the things he says he's into it. I think it's just for show to get like these big project green like do you think he's on like livestreams where you like

How does he have time? How do you have time for your slow? I feel like he's a celebrity you'd be like If you were a celebrity you'd be like torn? I feel like he's your sliver. You'd be like, if you were a sliver, you'd be like, I feel like you'd be always doing something. So it's like, if you have time to do World of Warcraft, you'd be like, you just nerdy shit. Yeah. But I assume if you get a certain status,

you're just in meetings or like photos. It's all the time. Like a bunch of rich people who like spend their time fucking around in Cabo and Yatson, fancy stuff. Oh, he just doesn't go Cabo Yatson. So he just goes to game room with expensive computer for like gaming. Oh. Yeah. Game room with expensive computer for gaming. Oh.

Yeah. That's why he's so cool. He's at the Warhammer headquarters, all the, they're constantly posting like, ah Henry stopped by again. And he's constantly just like looking at their miniatures and shit, like you fucking love to see it. Like, that's real. I love, I love Henry.

Because he's, he's. Have you met him? No. All right. And I never will. And I hope I have my phone you want to call My my favorite thing on the internet is seeing Big loser energy. It's the whole thing like every pound of weight that you lifted is a book

You lit didn't read or a language you didn't learn and then Henry's out here didn't read or a language you didn't learn. And then Henry's out here. I'm doing it all. I'm doing it all. Total adonis. Again, again, if you were an X-man, you'd be beast, right? Like that's your goal. Me?

Yeah, like Jack's dude, very smart. I want to be Wolf Rune. Bob. Yeah, playing does not want to be smart. All right. No, blame, blame, want muscle, blame, no one brain. We want muscle and metal and be. Metal calls.

Ooh, pick your X-man. Uh, mm, also Wolverine. Can I do also Wolverine? Oh, I don't know, Beast. Sure. That's good. Yeah, you're hairy. How do you beast hairy and answer juggernaut?

Night crawler. I had like, night crawler. Night crawler, fucks. Yeah. It's got that blue tail. Who knows what he does with that thing. We all know what he does with that thing. He's out in coming, so we all know.

Yeah. I like the cartoon version of him, though, where he had like the long hair in the accent. Yeah. Gambit's cool. I like Gambit. And I got that. I got that.

I got that new old. I don't know that. I got that new woman accent now. God. I know it like it's the second language. Just by the deep right chicken. I think you say sucky. Sucky.

Sucky. Sucky. Stack out. I declare going down to the public. Did they have publics in the Netherlands? I don't know. I don't think so. I think that would not.

I thought public was public was only Florida. It's Florida and then it created. Florida touches Georgia. Yeah, it's a Florida. Have you heard of the Florida Georgia Yeah, it's a Florida. Yeah, it's a Florida. I have to say that. Or the rapper, Florida.

I was in a room. Who did a song with the Florida. I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a room.

I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a room.

I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a room. I was in a when Kesha was in the background of his song, but nobody knew who Kesha was yet. Oh, where? And it was like his very popular song when he was first coming out and then like a year later we got Kesha. And it's just her. And the world has never been the same. Man, the world hasn't been the same since the last time I was happy was the last time Kesha put out a summer album. And the world never was good again after that. Is that when she was waking up in the tub feeling like pitted it?

Yeah, for the glasses, yeah. Did you see the video her trying to give fucking Jerry Seinfeld a hug? Yeah. And he blows her off the carpet. It's the worst thing in the whole world. He's like, oh, God yeah. Hell yeah.

He has to be. But like, you see him though and you don't expect him to be a nice guy. Yeah. Shut the fuck up. I don't expect him to be a nice guy. Yeah. Shut the fuck up. I don't want to assume he's an asshole just because he's one of those comedians. It's like, everyone's afraid to laugh now. Right.

You can't say anything. He's college kids. And like, no, you're too rich and no, you can't relate to any of your own. He's a shitty old dude from New York. And he's an asshole. Right. Yeah. I just like, I don't know.

I feel like at a certain point when if you get two famous as a comedian, you're no longer funny and relatable. Sure. It's like Kevin Hart, Ellen, like it just happens. It's just like, you think Kevin Hart's mean? You think Ellen's a comedian? Oh. Thanks. I think she says observations out loud.

She just says, she just doesn't have a phone. Oh, there's no punch line, it's just. No, I'll just observation. You ever noticed? Yeah. And then she just goes, yeah. Man, is she associated with horror? We are going to locate it.

Well, no, they canceled their big scene. They deleted her animated show. No, we had the Ellen animated show. Whoops. And no, it's gone. That was like, Ellen? Yeah, well, she was a little kid, and she went on little kid adventures

and Zazov deleted it from the face of the earth. Yeah, a little Ellen? Yeah, Ellen. That was Ellen. Well, Ellen. You know, Ellen? Yeah, Ellen. Well, Ellen. You like looking to her shit, like how she like, spraught on a celebrity who they thought

might have been pregnant. And then she's like, Hey, let's cheers that. Here's some champagne. Putting her in a position where she had to drink the champagne. And if she did, it would be suspicious. And she refused to drink the champagne.

And then that's how she made her announce that she would press. And then like a week or two later, that person miscarried. It was my carry. Yeah. Holy shit. Yeah.

It was in 2008. What the fuck? There are so many horror stories. She's, yeah. It's a picture of evil stories. Like Ellen being an asshole was around for a long time before it all came to me. It just wasn't so hard.

I remember being in college, like friends would go intern and they're like, oh, it's on the Ellen show. And it's like, yes, she yelled at me because I looked at her in the eyes. Or like, we, oh, then she swooped down and turned around. I'm just starting beating you on the phone, I don't know, any of these people involved.

I just know that Ellen is a staunch vegan. And it was like, this was 15 years ago before you could have a gluten-free vegan cake. And I remember my friend being like, I was an intern on the Ellen show and we all ate the vegan cake and I ordered the cake and the cake wasn't vegan. Don't tell Ellen.

Like, don't let this get back to Ellen. So I don't even remember who that person was but I know that they worked the Ellen show. Ellen was housing some non-vegan cake. You have a black-on salad breaking in your shit, yeah. Yeah, I know literally Who was it? Yeah

She's like friends with like George's VU Bush Like that's not a red flag Oh, it's cute It's a key B He's a work criminal He paints now The Casey painted too There's a good vegan bakery not too far from here

Yeah You're in there It's like a client who's a key kill I've done rebel cheese in that place is dank Real cheese good. Yeah rebel cheese. Let's look a vegan. That was a weird experience. Well, I'm gonna be I don't know. So vegan deli close to the studio. Yeah Oh

It's fine. Rebel cheese is thrown a uh drag show We're dead out the dog park. How many proud boys did you see? That one just about every week, I think. Yeah, that's cool. Like six. Those are best travelers.

Where do they have the proud ones? Where do they have the proud ones? They've been like, they've been like, we cutting and processing and rolling up the like drag shows like the past three months. What the fuck is that kind of thing? There's been a bunch of like counter, like, armed leftists showed up to one and I think

I think it was best job, I'm not sure if I like it. I think it was, if there was one in Texas this week, we're a bunch of armed, like a bunch of armed gay people then showed up. And then it was a lot more of that. Gays with gun. Rainbow Glock.

Yeah, no, literally. There's a subreddit called, it's a little liberal gun owners. Liberal gun owners. I'm on it. It's my favorite subreddit because they'll post shit. They'll post shit where it's like, this is like anyway, this is my kit and it'll just be like

Just guns like you think when you see like a crazy person guns, but then like their best has like a Transpriced flag on it and it's like and it's just like this pussy grabs back or whatever and it's just like okay I guess yeah, we got our people to yeah, we got yeah someone's got a someone's got their protect us. Yeah It's like I love that so much. That when I was driving up to Oklahoma, we got to, we had, so my grandmother's moving out of her house. In the town of.

No, okay, all right, got you. How do bunch of shit that we had to go move, like hand to my parents that was left over in my grandma's house. She's alive, she just moved to assisted living. Okay. But I knew you were gonna ask. And so there was this one box in there

that like we were kind of, we threw in the bed of the truck and just drove up to Oklahoma. He was a fucking shotgun and my dad didn't tell me. And he was like, oh good, my gun. He was just rattling around in there. And he was like, oh good, my gun's here. And he like, takes out the truck and I was like,

what? And he opened it a few times from Shell's Clown. Yeah, he opens it, shoots the shells. And he was like, oh, I didn't know that I left those in there. I was looking for these. Yeah, I was like, hey, maybe next time when I'm moving guns across state lines. I know.

Oh, man. Oh, yeah, I was probably not a problem in Oklahoma. Definitely not a problem. Sure. Yeah. You're so glad you're okay. The safety's broken on this thing. Right.

God. Good Lord. Man, I think about this a lot. It's like one of those things that keeps me up at night thinking about what if I had an airsoft gun and it was a little shotgun and you loaded it by putting the BDs into this like rod and then you stick it down on the front barrel part

and then it just cocks them in the movesmen. Yeah. And I remember like finding it. I was like going to my closet at one point and I found it and it was like years after airsoft was a fad. And I was looking at it and I was like, I looked down the barrel. No. And then I like had my finger on the trigger and I was like, it was like years after Airsoft was a fad. And it was looking at it and it was like, I looked down at the girl. No.

And then I like had my finger on the trigger and it was like, oh, maybe not. And I turned it and I shot it in a baby flu. Two different like multiversives. Yeah, you made it two time one. There's one where I would have been Nick Fury with the shittiest story.

Oh yeah, cause it's a baby. I don't feel like Airsoft goes out of style. You just grow out. Like there's like a, every boy goes through like Airsoft phase. There's like dudes that are like big and earth. Oh yeah, I'm gonna reach 18 or 21 in some states. Right, yeah. Yeah.

Oh man, I wanna go ski shooting. I haven't been skiing since I was a baby. So the shotgun that I have is actually my dad. So he got my grandfather's, I have my dad's, and it is called a, it's called a slam fire. And he was like only put one shell in it. Apparently it's just where, it's what they called like a trench sweeper during World War One. Okay.

And yeah, so when you shoot it, did you get your grandpa's sealant out to you? I don't know. But like when you shoot it, you shoot it, and then when you pull forward on the shotgun, it shoots it again without having to pull the trigger. What? It's like the most dangerous fucking gun.

It's just a world war one version of an automatic weapon. Pretty much. And that's insane. So, it's like, too too. Yeah, so you go, you go boom, like boom, boom. That's the serious thing. That's the serious thing.

That's the most compromising position. Yeah, a hundred percent. That's the scariest thing I've ever heard. I want to go skeet shooting with it and he was like, good, make sure you hit it on the first target and don't put more than one bullet in it or you're gonna be on your ass and you might hit somebody. I was like, oh, cool, thanks.

I'm glad you gave this to me as a gift. I want one of the ones that you can like, you pop it and then it has the thing. You want the terminator to gun. You want the, you want the, uh, uh. Which is, yeah, you want the T2 gun which is just a reference to stage coach. John Wayne stage coach coach. He's the same way. I don't want to represent What is that what is that a breach bearer?

A breach barrel breach barrel. I have a airsoft gun that's that but it was a mod so for tea to it was modified So he could swing it around because he broke his hand on one take because he had the not because he's fucking drunk all the time Wait, I was drunk. Oh, no, I thought you were talking about the John Wayne. Oh, oh, oh, John Wayne was drunk on every set he was ever on. Yeah, I'm hearing that he was a piece of me. He was a tech. My favorite, my favorite joke in the bird cage is when Nathan Lane walks across the restaurant and as John Wayne. And then Rob was like, he was like, was that good? He's like, yeah, I just didn't know John

Wayne walked like that. And then now I can't ever not see it. Cause John Wayne absolutely walks like Nathan Dade. It's so good. I watched that. So good. So it is a perfect film. It is one of the most perfect films. It is my favorite film because it goes, it's that,

I feel like there's this thing about 90s movies where they just go, they just go. Because it's just like, it's not like anything's built up. It's not like it's a, like, like the music. There's like scoring. No, there's just it just happens. So it's just like oh, they're at a gay club. Oh, this guy has a son. Oh Nathan Lane is a drag queen. It's just like a ball rolling out. And it's like oh, oh, I'm thinking I did these. Oh, her dad is a conservative Republican who's running for office. Like it's so it's so good. It's also one. It's one of the best blocked films I've ever seen. Like just where the camera is in relation to the actors.

There's like, at one point, at the very end, there's this tracking shot that winds up landing on a group, like a nice tabloid, like four people standing around a chair. I'm not gonna ruin the movie if you haven't seen it. It's very good. So good, please watch it. The entire thing is like,

you're following different people through the room as they're doing this thing. And then there's a reveal at the end, which turns around. And they all look into a mirror. And you don't see the camera, but it's this perfectly framed mirror shot. And that's the last, that's in to Vax 3. So it's like story to blocking is like one of the most perfectly done films of everything.

Perfect movie. Yeah. In chat, Moonbolts for dinner says that that's called a slam fire trench. That's right. And a slam fire. Say it was kind of rare. Oh. They're kind of rare.

And you give it to your son one day. Super scary. Yeah. I'm like, are they rare because people throw them out when they see them do that? And they're like, oh, this is broken. Oh, holy. And like, you can run through, that was the whole thing. It was like, you would get, if you were an enemy combat and you got in the trench

You could just like sweep the trench out because you just blame a big that's a very Kind peaceful way to say murder Everyone in your path. I can't shoot I can't shoot normal shotguns because I'm tiny. Oh, and Yeah, and so I can only do like sideload, like a sideloading like Winchester, because otherwise it, I shot a normal gun one time, and I don't bruise. I had a bruise like this being on my arm from that. It was stupid. You know who I feel would own a slam fire shotgun would be Eric, the libertarian grubber.

Coming, taking. Oh, there it is. I was gonna say. He's not gonna pay taxes, but I'm gonna pay. I'm gonna pay. I'm gonna pay. I'm gonna pay. Eric the libertarian. Yeah. Coming. Yeah. No, there is. Uh, I was going to see that he's not going to pay taxes, but still expect corporate where the still expect corporate bailouts for. I won't pay for it, but police.

There's someone out front come help me. Uh, I know a skeet shooting place in Austin. Really? Yeah. It's a place. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Capital city clay. go. I want to go. All Texas plays. Yeah, yeah. Cat was a capital city clay.

Something like that. Can we go? You have to bring your own stuff so we have to get, you know. I'll just go to Walmart and buy a gun. It's so easy. No, there's a dude in town. He's a gay army vet. So if you're going to support anybody,

you might want to get that guy. Does he have skeet shooting? I mean, he has guns that you could buy to the take to the ske-treat. How do I think I could ever, like, oh my God. Word. Like, I feel like every time I use a gun, I'm like, that was so fun, no one should own this.

I'm just like, all guns should be like at the range and you have it in a locker. It's locked up. And you can go and do all the fun stuff there and then you put it back in the locker. Because I'm just like, it's horrifying. It's a tool whose function is death. Yeah, like a shovel, you can kill somebody,

but it digs a hole, a gun has one function. You can shoot a hole. You can shoot a hole, you can't, yeah. Like I don't believe, like I won't shoot a handgun, because those are only for murdering people, but like a shotgun, you can hunt with them, you can kill, or whatever they call those. With them, the meme, the 50, you can kill or whatever they call with them.

The meme, the 50, I forgot about that. Yeah, well, the 50, the 50, the 50, feral, feral hogs in my backyard. What am I supposed to do without my assault rifle with the extended mag? Oh, my God. That was my favorite meat. 30, the 50, feral hogs will not be fun, never not be funny. No, no. Never not be funny. No,

it's so good. There'd be the 50 Ferrell Hawks is what the Libertarian Goblin calls a Friday night. We're all hanging out. No, the worst part is the voice. He goes real Shapiro in the 10. Yeah. Libertarian. How old is it? Like, it's so much. Can we name this episode Dark Brandon? Yeah. I thought we were going to be in the Libertarian Gremlin. Yeah, correct.

Libertarian Gremlin. That's not what I want to call this episode. Let's call it Let's Go Dark Brandon. Oh, what do you call it, Eric's nickname. He's real like nickname. Let's go Dark Brandon. I think let's go that. Dark Brandon is a solid title.

Yeah. No, what about the game? What if we just drop it? What if we just go the post office? Hold on. What if we just call it Let's go dark Brandon. I think let's go that brand is a lot of title. Yeah No, what about what if we just drop it? What if we just hold on? What if we just call it? Let's go Brandon and then we get more views than we've ever gotten before. Let's go dark Brandon No, let's go dark Brandon. No No, they tune back in they're like finally I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. What is it?

Just hold the comments on YouTube. I'm back. All the comments are like, have me in the first half. Is anyone else like super misled by the title in this episode? Someone photped a Maga hat on me in the thumbnail. It would be great. Oh, I would say. Are you in the... Yeah, and then also Photoshopped

pants on my face over my face. That was my favorite thing that happened this weekend. Like this, sweetie thing? Yeah. That was so. Like her perfectly, you know, she'd like had all these photos that were very strategic in the framing. It's like an inevitable brother. My favorite was like, it was the home lander gift of home lander like watching a TV and

just slowly you pissed off. And it's like, Sydney, sweet, you're dad watching her on euphoria Pinto her fight. Yeah, fucking a black guy Also also she curated it still had to do with the with the with the button blue line t-shirt Your dad was it is not your dad. I don't know That was so fucking funny. That sent me when I saw because like those kids trimmed all the time I was like, oh she's not getting enough? And then when I was scrolling through, I was like, this is the funniest thing I've seen. But on the other end, there was some people that,

what did people expect you to do? And then they showed the gift of Star Lord shooting cart rustle? So, I was just laughing at whoever was commenting on that. It's so funny. I was just laughing at whoever was commenting on that. Oh, it's so funny. That's okay. Zazelop's not gonna let there be a season three anyway, so who gives a shit?

Just stop it, stop. He's season two kind of stuff. Well, you think he's gonna listen to this? I don't know, you don't know. A show like that costs money. Yeah. You have to use your brain. You have to write a script for that.

We can't be having that. This show's gonna, he's not gonna cancel us. We're unscripted, it's cheap. It have to write a script for that. We can't be having that. This show's going to, he's not going to cancel us. We're unscripted, it's cheap. It's easy to make. Zero dollars. People are going to like, this is going to be the one where it's like, the fuck, root your teeth. And then they show this.

They show that $1. If I had $1 for everybody, yeah. We're the time we fell. I made a, in circles, I made a post-ruse like, I missed when Rooftophe used to make good merch. And it was the picture of the piradol from like five to six years ago. I'm like, you made a tweet in circles. I mean, you come on here.

You're talking about it. I didn't, but it's like, it's funny. Like, I could have post that. I just wanted a little kick for my Rostri friends. The problem I have is I don't use the Twitter app on my phone. I use a third party app called Tweetbot. So it always lags behind in the API. It does not have parity with actual Twitter.

So there's no way for me to know when something gets posted to circles or it gets posted to regular. So it's like, I saw that tweet and I was like, that's a weird tweet. I had no idea it was on circles. I truly said it right now. Twitter circles is gonna be the downfall

of corporate America. There's more to it. It is the, you're not on mute of, of, of, of, of, of, of 2020. It is an HR nightmare. It is. You're not on mute. Holy.

And you're also, I'm starting to find out, I was going to air it about this, you're starting to find out like, oh, I'm in their circle. Yeah, I don't know what you like me. Oh, yeah, we trust each other. I always feel like that with the green stories on Instagram. Yeah. Like, ooh. Juicy.

I think I'm only, I didn't know how to, I still don't know how to like, find, like, do close friends. So I think I found out about it one day, I think on like an MDB set. And it's a Barbara Dunkelman is my only close friend. Like, the only person if I wanna post it close, it's like, close friends.

It's just Barbara. It's just Barbara. It's just Barbara. I have the tweet feature. What is that? I cannot accept. What is a code tweet? So like somebody can tweet and then it's like from both of you.

Yeah, like if you made a joke together and one of you like workshopping it, you can give him credit. I have code tweets that are just sitting there and it's like accept or deny and I code it. Nothing. It just takes me to the tweet. Nothing happens. It's like, okay, so what's this feature?

It's so dumb, it's so dumb. Yeah, it's like, what is this then? I don't know, I keep like replying and just going like, except, yes, thank you. Sure, thanks. You know what, I learned this weekend from TikTok, TikTok taught me is that apparently like, and for some heterosexual people,

they use close friends as like, like flirting and hooking up. Cause it's like you put close, you put like people you wanna fuck on your close friends list. So you when you post, they're like, oh this is for me. This is some super snapchat. No it is some super snapchat shit.

Cause I was like, I feel like I put people who like, I would go to like brunch with or like hang out with on after work on my close friends. Most of my close friends are like people that are mutual follows. Yeah. Because we have more public facing like. Yeah.

My rule of thumb is if I'm okay with this person knowing where I live, they can be close friends. Oh. Very good. I don't know, I guess it's not either. No, I just don't ever use it. Oh, I don't know a post. It's just Barbara.

Yeah. It's just Barbara. Yeah. It's just Barbara Duggle. Yeah. Only close friends. No, it's just, I just have two close friends. It's a Ratman and the Libertarian grandma. Sure, got one. No, it's it.

And now I'm going to add two of you, the Tupacabra cat, after you get it. What is that fucked up framing? How high is the camera? I don't understand why it's like, like, I was right there actually. I thought he was holding his laptop forward. Right. It's like toddler hands. It's just. Stop it. Stop it. The gates is. This is a predatory angle.

So I use Twitter, but I'm not very popular. Like I've had a couple of viral hits. I think one was during the freeze. And so, and I'm not, I'm also not super popular on TikTok. And so I use, and I'm going to be very vulnerable on the podcast right now. And so I use and I'm gonna be very vulnerable on the podcast right now. Okay, I use if Eric liked it or not as if it was good. That's what I use as a litmus for. Did I do it was I won't even know or was that a good video?

That's what I use for if Eric likes it and I know it's funny. Yeah, I get to work shop all my shit in the morning. How many people do you think at Rooster Teeth are of the club of if Eric liked it? It was good content most if not I feel like most if not all I'm sure there's like a pretty good cell of people who are like Inspiring to get Eric fucking shit can probably I think so too. I think there's a how many people do you think at Rooster Teeth right now want to get you fired? Let's see what's the ratios how How many people are in broad? You're above one. First two, probably Mike Pertle. We're sitting there.

But he has that soundboard. What do he, he would be out of date if he'd leave. Yeah. Well, that's all he needs. He's like, if I get rid of him, I can get his pay. I will be here. I will. I will.

Yeah, he can. Yeah, keep talking to you. Just getting more clips going in the A the AI. We were filming something earlier and Blaming me to comment about laughing and then without missing a beat Mike Perdle played a soundboard a blame laughing But it's a laugh that I've never heard before. Can you play it? Do you have it? I'm pretty sure I've heard you do that. That laugh came from my home. I don't think I have a laugh in studio No, shit I don't think I have a middle-ass in the studio. Yeah, no shit. Okay.

The podcast is just a mic-earned soundboard. It's just a mic. It's just mic-in-like a DJ booth at a club. Just like one of your orange play-pulling different sound. One day, you're going to tune into our team's live. And it's going to be corpses with like, do like string and taster mouths and Mike just going, ha ha ha ha.

When we were during pandemic, when we were during the heights of the pandemic, I should say when we were all doing podcasts from home, Mike sent me the audio files for the Eric Soundboard and there are so many, I only have like, on my go-exLR I have a maximum of 12 different maps, like, soundboards I could map. So I just had to like, put them all in one folder

and I just made one random Eric Soundboard button on my GoXLR. It's like, it plays one file at random from the folder. We should put it on ebombs world. What do you want from me? There's so many, there were so many files in there. We should just, we should just sell the Eric files Like on the store like as a plug-in down. I just want to show call the air Cheating me yeah, we should doing it myself. We should do Spotify

I'm in hell. I'm in hell. Yeah, they will the fish jam dollars you can make. It's the ultimate way Are there any dogs got to eat? Was that you were in I don't know so specific when would you want to a shoot I have it on on Which I have a sound board of you. Yeah, so it's like all your 200 bits wait you a bunch of different sound bites that are just that You actually do twitch. I thought yeah, I thought that was a bit No, I thought any time that you're on Twitter like sorry guys. No stream tonight. I'm doing some other stuff I was thought that was a joke. He likes stream, you like that.

And actually stream, it was just, you've been like, there's like, 200, 250 people that you have ever. Oh, yes. My favorite tweet ever was a Gavin Tweet. And it was like amidst a bunch of people saying, sorry, guys, no stream tonight. And Gavin, who does not have a Twitch said, all right, guys, no stream tonight.

Yes. Oh no. Ah! He's here too. All right well let's go ahead and let's wrap this one up. Okay. There's a lot of fun. It's good group.

Yeah, thank you everybody for watching. We'll see you guys next week. Bye. What was the seer throwing in? Huh? to see your fro again. Huh? Do you like apples? Example, together in Trempathos, Characombs, Characombs are free to deal as I'm nothing to do with this podcast. Analyze various unsolved, and Ruestrites cryptic podcast,

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