Rooster Teeth Podcast - Gavin or Gaggle – #379

Episode Date: June 7, 2016

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It's time to put your pedal to the metal. From the twisted minds behind Deadpool and Zombieland, an executive producers, Will Arnett and Anthony Mackie comes the new Peacock original series, Twisted Metal, a high-oxane action comedy based on the classic video game series. Anthony Mackie stars as John Doe, a motor-mouthed outsider who must deliver a mysterious package across a post-apocalyptic wasteland.

If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnet, and Thomas Hayden Church, twisted metal, streaming now, only only on peacock. Oh Hello everyone welcome to the receive podcast this week brought to you by Caster's Harry's and trunk clubs Caster's Harry's and trunk club. Thank trunk club We said it twice at the same time or find sponsors for sponsoring this episode of the podcast I'm Gus Gavin vibrant hello everybody. I'm Bernie and I'm Gus. I got a springy mic I'm just gonna do that whenever you're knowing me today. Yeah, it's awful Before we get to do anything else I would remind people that if you are watching the tips of the podcast on YouTube, we originally broadcast it live Monday evenings, exclusively

for sponsors on our website. You can click on the link below for a 30-day free trial and watch the podcast live. And like that, we're going to cut that out. Oh, but no, we can't. So you get to see that. It's not for good, weird stuff that happens. Well, that was live. That's a lot of good stuff.

It's been a long time since we've all been here together. It's been a little while. I feel like I'm under set. We did it. I feel like it's been a long time since we've all been here together. It's been a little while. I feel like I'm like, I'm like, I'm gonna set. We did it fairly recently, but it's been, uh, it's been more often on lately. I'm more often. We've been more often on. What's that? I knew set has more pink hair. I regret it.

And let's Gavin here. Bring up the set thing. Yeah, Gavin got a haircut. I did. He's all baby faced. You look so cute. I looked homeless for a long time. I was over it.

I don't want to, I don't have a big bushy bed and like, scragly hair anymore. I never, I never thought that you looked time. I was over it. I don't wanna have a big bushy bed and like, scragly hair anymore. I never thought that you looked like PewDiePie ever until you guys both had like that big, enormous, like, grizzly beard. Which is weird for both of you because you both have these like, baby faces. Seeing Gavin like this makes me feel like I've traveled back

to like 2005. I feel like, I think that's what the kind of hair you had when I first met you. Yeah. When I was like, Hi, I guess. Please of hair you had when I first met you yeah when I was like oh Yeah, please find my DVD Your impression of yourself is our impression of you We just did some signatures

So I was on a plane the other day and where you going? I love playing stories. I was coming back from cancun and I got to think about something on the plane like I don't can't do it Cancun was awesome. I'll talk more about that in a bit Okay, but I'm on the plane and you know the the chime goes off You know the time boom. Why is that the sound? Like it started driving me crazy in the middle of the air. Why is that the sound? You let stuff like this. I suppose to look what was it for anything? What? I Feel like the chime is relaxing.

It's non-threatening. Why is it the same on every plane? Well, some of the things, it malls when they go, doom doom doom. When they do that. Or like, that's like subway stations. I like it when they do that. There's a flood and my phone goes,

oh! It's been, it is finally like we have four days in a row of sunshine on the weather forecast. It has not been like that in forever. It's been, it is finally like we have four days in a row of sunshine on the weather forecast. It has not been like that in forever. It's been bad. So this is something actually, I complain on Twitter a lot. I complain about weather and I, I don't know why I've got that. You just take a screenshot the entire week.

I don't know why I've gotten to that point of life. That's where I am now. I don't need the weather. I'm not caring about the weather. I don't need the weather. I'm not caring about the weather. Two things I would, I was very happy to never care about. Do you know what they are?

You can too. Weather and sports. gaff good looks I know them I had those I had those on lock so it's good It's weather and the price of gasoline. I used to be very excited that I was like one of those people that say what is the price of Gasoline? I don't give shit because it didn't matter what does that mean that in the weather Were two things that I couldn't control but I had had to take part in any way. So fuck it. I'm not going to bother with it. I'm not going to worry about it.

I'm just going to be like, that's a tad, I'll just, you know, take off a layer. And if it's wet, I'll walk faster to the car. So what made you want to tweet the weather? It's something happened two years ago, where from March to June, it just rained straight now. I remember that. That was, yeah, two months worth. It just rained, it just rained straight now. I remember that. That was, yeah, two months worth. It just rained straight, and this year too.

You started later, it started April this year, but it's been raining now for like, I'm just picturing you two months waking up, opening the curtains and just being like, at the sky. Old man yells at the clouds. Well, you're upset by two Gavin, because you said you moved to Austin for the weather,

and one of many reasons. And then you just got London's weather. Yeah, in Austin, I actually just was in London and the weather was top. Yeah, it was brilliant. I swear if it starts snowing, I'm out of here. You're gone, are you gonna go down the main Canada next? Go ahead and further south.

I'm going back to Kent, wait. But I do have to say something because there's other states in the Union, particularly California, where they've had enormous amounts of drought for a long period of time and Texas had the same thing We were having those pictures that people would put up of like here was the lake back in 2002 Right here. It is today and it looks like a mud puddle now like all this water It seems like the end of the world seems like oh shit climate change is really gonna destroy us all

You definitely got that feeling of looking at those photos in California. You can still see those photos they have them up But last year in 2015 it it just started fucking raining. All of a sudden, and it just didn't stop for like three months. And then this year, the same thing again, our lake, which was at 34%. I used to make fun of the hipsters and the lake levels. So they used to be at 34% lake level. And they were like, all the homes out on Lake Travis

were just a misery. And now it's today It's at a hundred and eighteen percent of its capacity. Holy shit like it completely turned around in a year essentially It turned around like it's overflowing. Yeah Well, they have to like open the damn now to let a bunch of it out But they have to be careful because there's been so much fucking rain that everything downstream We'll get fucking flooded because we're gonna let the lake go down a machine guy going like I want to see the opening of the damn Today and he like walks down and stands by the opening.

And she's like, You wanna me to go and film the opening of the dam? And then he said it was crap. Yeah, it was underwhelming to say the least. I wanna gather under film for some of the guys, cause his videos that give you the best are balloons or water. That's, and if you combine waters and balloons, water's in, you're good.

Should've brought me and I would've been like, damn! Oh Jesus. There's a, Barbara, that was like such an enthusiastic set up on your own part. Why doesn't you like that thing? In the month of May, 37.3 trillion gallons of water fill on the state of Texas.

Yes, see that. And that gets enough water to cover the entire state in eight inches. The crazy thing I read about it was that it was enough water for, what was it, if everyone drank eight glasses of water a day, it was enough water for everyone in the world for like eight years or something like that. It's on that same chart.

You lost me without a step. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So basically it's 64, or 56 billion glasses of water times eight. What for eight years, eight years. So you're gonna get out. You lost me on that one too, but I'm with the guts. When stats about water come in,

it's just you can't relate to that anyway. Well, I can't visualize a trillion gallons of water. I don't know what that looks like. It was enough water fill on the state of Texas, which, you know, there's not cups on every square foot of Texas to capture this water. But like, if it was, if there was that amount of water, we could somehow capture it.

It was enough fresh water to have everyone in the world have fresh water for like eight years. Cups wouldn't work anyway though, because they go in and you'd lose like an agap space between the cups. Now, if the rims all touch each other and they're square, well, because a cup, a cup, like you have gaps at the edge.

It's getting a square cup. You'd have to have a have a if the rim if the rim is the the widest point yeah That's the part to catch the water. No, but if if you if you're if you catch it a funnel. That's less water in there Well, it's all the depth of the cup That's all the matters if it's a four-foot high cup It's not gonna rain that much. What do you mean if you catch it in the funnel, there's less water in there. I don't know. If I can get it in the water. Are you saying you're not gonna do cup

next to each other, there's a gap. What is under the rim counts? If this was a cone, if I was catching it at a traffic cone, there'd be less water inside it. If you make a taller cup, then it doesn't make a difference. You're not gonna rain enough to fill that cup up anyway.

You're not! You said, hey, inches. So give me a 12-inch cup, Gavin. It's not! You said, hey inches. So get make a 12 inch cup, Gavin. It's just volume. It's just a geometric volume. God dammit. A little bit of a get hung up on like the weirdest tiny semantics like that.

As long as the rims are all touching, you're catching all the water. You caught, I've all the rims touching. I don't have round cup, because this gap's not in the end. Now you're saying round cup. On the rims, the top is round. I even said, if all the cups are square, you're good.

Yeah, you did say that. All right. You can even have a gigantic funnel that runs off and do a container at the bottom. As long as the container is big enough to contain all the rainfall, that's great. The only way to contain the water, how many did it? And to a cup.

Because the bottom of the cup is smaller in width than the top of the cup, you lose water, guys. Because as it goes down, it becomes less water. That's not the way anything works, Gavin. How many gallons? How many gallons are in the ocean? I got to deal with everybody on the fucking internet for a week now, trying to explain to me

how Gavin just understood something and was explaining it properly. And it's just, you're just fucking wrong. You're just wrong. If the rims are all touching and you're capturing the water on the surface area where it's falling, you capture all the water. Only if the rims are square. You can mess up and get too small of a cup and it overflows, but guess where it's overflowing? In and out of the cup.

So you're fine. Eventually you get to a point, somewhere in that landscape where you overcompensate it for cup, it's going to flow into that. I'm just picturing a jug in the middle of all the cups, raining over all of them, overflowing. I want somebody, some technical institute to make a field of study for Gavin's hypothetical science. Because none of your science, we're talking about cups that are covered in the entire state of Texas.

That's just nothing to apply to that. It's like the world's worst world problems. What do you mean this doesn't apply to that? What do you mean? There's no one's ever gonna do this. Like no one's gonna cover 80 square miles even. I mean, Texas is hundreds of thousands of square miles. They're not gonna cover 80 square miles even with cups.

I mean, it's not gonna happen. Much less square cups, and that's our real problem. And they're gonna make it work, and they're gonna find out that they caught enough water. That's it, just get a fucking rain gauge. You're done. So according to NO to Noah there are 352 quintillion gallons of water on earth Noah

Quintillian that's a quince it is it's got a funny game the water thought of that before Was that national ocean and they're not? Nerd how can't repeat that how many zeros in a quintillion I can't repeat that how many zeros in a quintillion 35 So this is a quadrillion is a quadrillion. And then the quintillion is a five billion. So that's how big it is. So it's five billions of water. A billion trillion.

A billion trillion. Well, a billion is a thousand million. I do not like the same I am. A billion? What was it? What was it? What was it? Oh, you got it.

Legitimate's fit take. Yeah, I think it's a billion trillions. Yes. Oh, you're doing it, I think it's a billion trillions. Yes. Oh, I think it's a billion trillions It's a million trillions It's a million trillions it's a million because a thousand trillion I'm really I had two more sets of three zeros. So it's a million trillions just interrupts himself what That's like I can go like this and go, wait, I have an idea. Woo.

Oh, oh. Oh, I'm Twitter at Victory 1140. Suggest that the name of that science be gavology? The science of what? Yes, that is. Whoa. Is that WOT? Yeah, of course.

I'll clean this up. Whoa. Thank you. So thanks for that. I have it. Yeah, Thank you. So thanks for that Yeah, so you talked about not understanding the like the volume of water of like a trillion I don't visualize it. No, it's impossible I wouldn't even if you said how many gallons of water in a swimming pool. I would have no idea I wouldn't even know it's a guess even when I got the whole discussion about how many square miles in Texas

Guess how many square miles are in Texas? Any idea? Give me a guess. No, no 100 square miles Hold on how many square miles in Texas?? Any idea? Do we get 100? No, no. 100 square miles. Hold on. Six. How many square miles in Texas? I have no idea. I'd say 2.8 million. Square miles?

Square miles though. Think about that. I don't even, I mean, so the six million. A guy said hundreds of thousands. I was worried I was wrong. It's two hundred, good boy. It's 268,000 square miles in Texas. Can we buy a new arm for burning? I like it. I'm gonna feel it. You're replaced by it next week. Can I tighten

this? I don't know. Have you seen all of the as a result of all the rain? I mean, a flathead screwdriver would be your best friend. As a result of all the rain in Austin, have you heard of all the people complaining about all the snakes that are coming out? Oh Jesus, really? What? Why would they know? Just some rain would would make snakes It wouldn't need a lot of rain mean right? I think it's like now there are I think the snake holes I mean the first thing it would fill up, but they're not drying out. They're not emptying so they have to find new places to live Oh, what kind of something? Olsene Oh God, yeah, I keep finding water boxes are five. This is it fucking hey day. Yeah, there's a there's a photo of someone Sent to us here. Who is this?

I'll do you in. No, I don't know the beginning, but I bet. Bower LN on Twitter sent a photo of Water Mockessons crawling out of a screwdriver. Oh, trying to escape from the rain. What kind of what kind of was it? Copperhead? Water Mockessons. Water Mockessons. Water Mockessons trying to escape from the rain. Yeah, I'm in their name. It's in their name. It's the first name. It's the first part of the ingredient. Whoa!

They're more water than Mockison. Oh, oh my God. Thank you. That is like a lasting you would expect to find on the back of a boat. Holy shit, who posted that? Rick Allen, who's that? You know that guy?

Or just that viral thing that you found? I think they pull it up there in the control room. That was not me. You saw it out? No. No, I thought so. Why don't you just put tape around it like that? I'll just put a little weight on it.

That's all. It seems a little, it's a little. Why don't you tape the screwdriver? So here's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna do this in a vat of hold it down. It's just barely under weight. So if you want the bottle opener, get fucked.

All right. So all this talk of water, maybe think about a story I read a couple of weeks ago. I think it was during World War II, there was a German submarine, and Germans were trying to make new submarines, and the big, water submarine.

Underwater submarine. Big problem they were having was trying to figure out how to store human waste. Like normally they would have septic tanks. Storing. Shoot out the would have septic tanks. Storing. Shoot out the torpedo tube. The pressure.

Like how do you get it out of a sub when it's at depth? Without having water come in. Put in those barrels. That's why you kill the sub. You're talking about that plane with the sexton hole. Right, very similar I guess. Just poo out of a hole. So what do you do?

But use it as propulsion. Too much pressure. So what? Now they put it at the bottom of the sub. Don't let me tell my fucking story. Wait, I have a question. If you put out of a hole in a submarine, would you ainess get sucked out? Yes. In the movie, the Abyss, they have an open thing. They wouldn't come up through the bottom of the space, the sea station, the little sea floor little thing they've got. This construct, they can swim up in that. How does that work?

I'm talking about reality. Would you, Anus get some doubt? Oh, that's what it is. That's the pressure. That's the pressure that they would get pushed in. All the water is wanting to force up. It would be like a really full school. What they explained there was they raised the air pressure

in the vessel to counteract the pressure of the water. Which I'm sure there's a lot of pressure on the inside of a submarine. Underwater World War II Marines. So normally, this is World War II, this isn't the abyss. These are submarines. the water coming out. Which I'm sure there's a lot of pressure on the inside of a submarine underwater world war two Marines. So normally this is what work to this isn't the abyss. These are submarines. I'm Marines.

They were fighting. The Germans were fighting Americans not trying to fight any of these involved. This is what that's for dogs because they're submarines. So anyway, normally what they would do is they wouldn't have like giant septic tanks where they would hold all of the waste. The Germans want to get rid of that septic tank because it's just like wasted space. Sure.

They could put people there that could make the sublider. You got to spend fuel to haul that shit around. So they invented the machine you want, whatever it is, right? Like a system of valves on a toilet that would allow them to shoot the experiment out of the submarine. Look at this, you're like a Nazi scientist, Gavin. The problem is, on one of its early voyages

for a submarine with it, the captain used the toilet wrong. Oh no, while he was on it. Yeah, while everyone was on it and they were under water and sank the submarine Whoa, I thought you're gonna say he shot it back. Oh, yeah, it was a very fine. It's poo a little bit of a culprit He's someone flushed a toilet wrong And sank a submarine. Did it just it just flooded it? I guess yeah, I guess they turned the valves wrong and it was like it It sent water into I think think, the battery compartment? Batteries!

Let me see, uh, yeah. I think it's a shitty battery. Don't play with liquid, fill the toilet compartment, be kind of streamed down to the summerings, giant internal batteries, located under the bathroom, which we began producing chlorine gas. Oh, so then, yep, they had to surface, they were immediately sank. Ooh.

So, that reminds me of a story, which is, that's a gross story, which, well, I wanna play a game with Gavin here in a minute. But that reminds me of a horrifying story that we've talked about before I believe, which was about deep sea divers who came up from the depths and they were in a chamber to decompress. Do you remember this?

And like somebody opened a door wrong, and the chamber that they were in was still under super pressure. And so the moment they opened the door, it like basically pushed everybody in that room through a very small opening. Oh yeah. Remember that goes, it was like a, they call it something. It's called Delta P.

Delta P. That is like the equivalent of that crap getting sucked through the pipe. But with people through a small hole. Delta P is one of the creepiest videos on YouTube. Yes. Where's the video of it? The CG simulations. So, like, who would make that? There's no actual footage of it happening. It's just like- I'm always fascinated by videos where the serious budget on the animation. Like, how many people are watching Delta P videos? There's also a really,

there's no budget on that. There's really in-depth animation about how to turn a sphere inside out. Have you ever seen it? No. It goes it's like 18 minutes long. It's so in-depth that I'm just watching it thinking, who is this for?

Like who needs to know how to turn a sphere inside out? What does that mean? Turn a sphere inside out. I mean you can't actually do it. It's against physics. But why do they have a video showing you how to do it? I don't know. That's the whole point. And there's different rules on how you can do it.

And you have to twist it and push it in a certain way. You have to pop it. And it's like a conversation between a guy and a woman about how to turn a sphere inside out. And it's fully animated with like mega budget. I don't understand it. Who would imagine. Passion project.

It's like that rule that there's a porn for everything. There's an animated version. Okay, I'm playing Game of the Gabbard. I'm not sure exactly how to do this. I'm trying to work this out. Fuck me and you, Rickus. No, no, you'll understand a second while we can't. I'll give you a sheet though. Here you take one sheet. You don't show to Gabbard. Dude, you don't show to Gabbard.

It's so you want to guess here. Get this. Take this Gabbard. You're going to see. Gabbard? No, no, that's for Gabb that's for gap. Oh, you want one? No, no, I'm good. Okay, so here's what I've done Gus Nope, don't you fucking read it? So Gavin and I I've printed out five stories individual stories that I went to the top source on the internet. I went to Buzzfeed and I got stories from five sex stories and I went to Buzzfeed. And I got stories from five sex stories that will make you gag. So we're gonna play the gag reflex game.

You and I are gonna start reading the first story at the same time, and we're gonna see who can get through the most stories. Now, somebody read out loud, Gus? Like, we trade off those five stories on here. Looks like that. Yeah, read out loud. But no, then you're not doing a one-to-one comparison. So we had to both just read, maybe Barbara.

Yeah, you both read internally. You both read silently while Barbara reads aloud. It's just like, oh, it's a guide conversation. And this. Gavin used to do this thing where he would find dirtiest word possible when you read it. Heard to read it to you guys. So the losers who ever gagged first.

I don't think I have a gagged text. Well, if somebody's telling a story about something. Oh, you know, yeah. Yeah. You want Barbara to just read it and then see which of you you were. You remember the story about the guy who was putting the shit in condoms and eating later? That story made you gag. Yeah, I didn't read that though. You heard about it though. Okay. You have a garbage can on stand like this. You have to read along the sheet. You have to read along as she reads.

Am I reading this at low? Okay, you ready guys? You call it from this point on. All right, no, don't you. I'll call it. Okay, I'm just looking at you guys. I'm going to see who gags first. And I'm reading this.

Are you ready to read? He's already gagging. I read the title. Someone grabbed a plate. I don't know what the plate. All right, go ahead. Ready? I'm going to switch over.

This is the vomit vacuum. 321 go.. Ready? Play? I'm gonna switch over. This is the vomit vacuum. 321 GO. My boyfriend and I were on vacation and decided to head into the bedroom for the night. We had a little too much wine but still decided to have oral sex. I threw up on his penis and my instant reaction was to suck all the vomit back into my mouth. He later described it as a vacuuming sensation. I thought it was a pretty...

I thought it was a pretty... I thought it was pretty cool. I tried for so many two hours. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm gonna keep reading. I'm gonna keep reading. I'm gonna keep reading. And thought it was pretty cool. I tried for so many hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours.

I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours.

I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. I'm gonna go for hours. Oh God, I can't believe. Do we have another trash can with the stage for Bernie just to be so? You read the story before, too.

I think I was prepared for it. What's weird to me is I'd already read that story. I don't know. I saw the story and read it a few days ago. Oh, there's one behind him. Oh, there's one behind him. Oh, there's one behind him. All right, Steve Gav to make this.

I'm thinking. There he is. All right. The baby birdie. Wait, wait, wait. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, and up with her baby birding my own calm into my mouth. She literally fed it to me. She thought it was coffee. I'm burning it. But I was horrified. All right, I'm not playing this game anymore. No, that's a dream.

It's three more. I'm not playing this game anymore. I'm over two. You literally put these on the sheet. You could, you could, you could, I chose it because they were so bad. And I don't know why that one, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I Because it was so bad And I don't know why that one You can win the next three you can do this you know gag at this stuff. That's funny

You know how you don't gag you just don't picture yourself in the scenario I'm not featuring myself in this. Why is that you're going too far? Because that's usually what makes me gag is if I picture myself doing something. Come on Bernie, stick it out, you can do this. You can do this. All right, so if Gavin gets one more though, he wins. Yes.

You got to read it all the way through. Are you guys ready? Are not Bernie's? You ready? I'm ready. I'm ready. This is the potty mouse. One, go.

My best friend's boyfriend was going down on her, and he unfortunately ended up with toilet paper remnants. Oh, wait, that was out, that was out. That was, that was, that might have been record time. I mean, to finish it, because she didn't clean herself properly, he had bits of dirty toilet paper between his teeth. Dirty toilet paper, what?

Oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, okay, okay. Let me see. Throw that one over there. This is a nasty sound you burp. Oh, I don't gross too much. I don't know. Oh my God. Oh my God. Are we going on in the next one? Yeah, two to one. This is the most shameful walk of all time.

I met up with a guy from Grindr and he had the biggest penis I'd ever seen. I had to take his penis out of my ass because it hurt so bad and he said, damn, you made a mess. I saw what looked like a gallon of pee. damn you made a mess. I saw it look like a gallon of a gallon of beef stew. Oh he's walking down the town. He's giving up. All right, I've done it. We're done. I don't want

to read any more. That works as a tiebreaker. it's two to two. Don't look at it. Last one. There's more to that story, but I won't read it. Last one, the hidden present. My boyfriend came home drunk and wanted anal. We had done it once before, but we were both sober and careful to go slow and use loop. This time he was so drunk, he poured loop all over my ass

since shoved his dick right in. It hurt so bad I had to stop him after a minute or two. The next morning, he went to the bathroom and found shit under his first head. Oh, David stop. David stop. That had been there all night. Oh, guy, guys, did I mean when I come back?

You want to come back? Come back just like the baby birdie or store it. Stop it. Oh, you know what, you're all teary eyed and sweaty now. Oh, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, Someone who is this e-rock 393 on Twitter said you can tell who the fucked up people are by not reacting. I know you guys are just like taking it stride. It's funny. Oh my god. Here you want an African? Do beef stew.

Oh my god. I'm gonna die. That was a terrible game. I'm sorry I came up with that. I'm sorry I came up with that. I know. Apparently other people are also gagging in the social media right now. We need a theme song.

We should just be like a mashup of you guys making vomiting noises. We do as we end of the podcast. But to the tune of Gavin or Google. Right at the... ...Gavin old gaggle. Oh, don't be silly. That was really good. That earlier burp of yours didn't smell right.

What? It was vomit. It was like gutter-r-r, I feel like I know what your intestines and your stomach smell like now. Yeah. It's so like, play with it. No. Oh. Did you see you love this already? I just had a feeling this was going to work really well and it's going to recover now. Oh my god. I never get to play Gavin or Google. I said I'm feeling this is gonna work really well and I'm gonna recover

I never get to play gabbard or Google I always have to host it Thanks Matt Marren 13 you to say it was the best comeback story. Oh stop I keep going back to my little nuggets of memory. For me, still... Nugget. Steady break, dude. You wanna teach me real? Let's take five. Oh, I can be so mean right now and just say things that'll forgive you.

Like nuggets of dirty toilet paper. That was hard to wake up. In your teeth. So much that I just, I just tune into the podcast. What the fuck? I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, So I just I just you know the body cats what the Yeah, people I think that it seems like beef stew was the all-time favorite dear lord gagging and burpee Thanks apron squirrel that's very good So that's a really good one. So yeah, we're gonna play that live at RTX

I was okay to mention RTX in front of you too. Yeah. Are you at the point now where it's like... It's fine by me. Don't stay in front of Bethany. That's what made you guys. It's Bethany, calm. Or she like...

She's got a lot going on. Yeah, this is a lot... I mean, we have RTX. So, but not just RTX. She does every event. She do RTX last year. She was here for it, but she showed up right at the end. So she did some stuff, but this is like her first time doing it kind of solo.

Well, not really solo, but. So if it's bad bling her. But yeah, so it's like, it's less than a month away now. And we. 23 days. Yeah, we had the announcement earlier today that we have Palmer Lucky there. Yeah, you're going to be a panel panel. I'll be talking with him about VR, which I think is pretty cool. That's one that we've known for a while and we've been holding on to

And now I'm happy that we can finally talk about it. I've a few times. I've almost let it slip Like just in casual conversation like casual conversation on a podcast casual public conversation So now I'm I'm happy that I can actually talk about that Yeah, and also, you know before that we have let's play live in I can actually talk about that. And also, before that, we have Let's Play Live in LA. It's not this Friday, but next Friday. It's coming up real quick. A few of us were just at a kind of funny life.

Yeah, we joked about that on the pre-taped podcast. Were you here for that? Yes. Yeah, you were here. How great it was. It was actually really great. After having actually attended to it. This guy's put on a real good show.

It's phenomenal what they were able to do. I have never seen a better performance from a group of people who do gaming videos on the internet. Other than let's play live lots of you. Let's play live, then. Let's have it. He's everything. I was really impressed.

I was there for the first night. And you did a great job, by the way. So, you did stand up. You were really great. I was, why it was host of the show. And so as part of my duties for hosting the show I had to do About 10 minutes of standup like a mile walk at the beginning of the whole thing. I was like

Okay, do that so it's fun. So I did it like you know I think the best preparation we've got guys For doing standup is what would you say is if you had you stand up? What would you like go to and like your memory for like What skills if you learn from doing what would you like go to and like your memory for like, what skills have you learned from doing, what would be your best preparation for stand up? Improv training? It was a super convoluted way to ask that question, by the way.

Improv training probably? We did do improv training at one point. I would say the live podcast. I would think panels at our tips. Panels are definitely it. Like panels are, I feel like the closest thing we do on a regular basis. That was that podcast we did it

after the gunlet where COVID congested on it. We were just in front on a regular basis. That was that podcast we did it after the Gunlit, where COVID congested on it. We were just in front of a live audience. I really liked that podcast. We were part of a live audience. I thought we were at the state theater. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And Freddie came up, yeah, they were all there. Okay, I was thinking about the one we did

for the first gauntlet when we were at that, just at bar. Which I actually liked that one too, but it was kind of more of a regular podcast. Yeah. That seems like forever ago. It's nice to have audience reaction there. It is. It is nice to have that feedback.

But it buys you up. We should mention that we're doing a live podcast at TX. We're just going to be here. I'm just going to be like, am I just like heaving? I'm not like gagging, but like, you know, after an earthquake, all the pipes are cracked and they're like, what was leaking everywhere? I feel like that's my throat right now. A few people have suggested that during the podcast panel at RTX,

we should have free beef stew for the audience. Oh, Christ, yeah. Good guys. Jesus. Ugh. I don't know. I should be kind of a gross stuff. Saw an awful video on YouTube.

It was a thermal camera, like a car chase. Guy leaves the car. You can see, like, his little white image running around. He runs around the back of the house., blows his head off with a shotgun. But you can see where his head went, because it's thermal. Right, so you see white dots, some of it hits the wall and leaves a hot stain on the wall, some of it's on top of a shed and it's just like, the head really isn't made of anything, it's just a goop.

We might see the whole's a goop. We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We might be able to pull- We But you know what it is your brain fills in the blank and the guy on the helicopter is like ah, I just killed himself. It must look like a video game Looks a little bit cooler. Gee. Yeah Super grace. Yeah, that sounds awful. I've seen a lot of like thermal imaging clips. I think from war zones Before and they're just like the I don't know. It's something about the one layer removed from reality makes it like like really amplifies the humanity aspect of it even more so. Because your force, like look at it, you don't get kind of desensitized images

that you've seen, like violence or whatever, but when you're forced to look in a new way, it kind of like makes you like reconnect with it. It's just like, it's a little more jarring, I think, in that way. I wonder what a thermal intercourse would look like. I'm sure they have it to hot bodies. Thermal. I think especially right around it to hot bodies. Thermal.

Like especially right around the crotch area. Yeah, I guess so. Well, all the friction and... They have ever seen the X-ray porn stuff they've done? Yeah. Yeah, that's pretty impressive. Although I wouldn't know if I'd wanna be subjected to radiation for that long of a period of time.

On your balls. Yeah, it's like two and a half minutes. What's that? Oh, that's very nice of you to give me two and a half minutes. Appreciate that. There's no bone in the knob. So what are you showing there? Oh.

I think the ones I've seen are like blood flow. I think they can just kind of like turn it down. I've seen like MRI stuff. Yeah. Like they can show like when you're swallowing food, they show those MRI where you can see the tongue and everything. I think they can just kind of like dial down the opacity. World.

I don't know. Of your skin? They would wave that goes through you, the X-ray or whatever. I don't know. It seems like there's a different level of sensitivity they can use. They're put it through Photoshop. There you go. It would be funny though. It just goes fucking NASA photos.

If you couldn't see the dick or anything like that, but you did see like the women's like vagina expanding somehow and contracting, like when the dick was going inside and that. Well like she's been shacked by Kevin Bacon. Yeah, how are you making it? You hit a visible penis. Yeah. Like you did it with a clear, like a clear penis, like the equivalent like a butt plug.

I don't think I've ever seen that before. Oh, you know there's like bowls that you drop in water and they disappear if it was made of that. I don't know what you're talking about. I've seen those, I know exactly what he's talking about. Do you? Yeah. So if she was underwater and you just sho don't know what you're talking about. I've seen those, I know exactly what he's talking about. Do you? Yeah.

Yeah, so if she was underwater and you just shoved like a penis one of them up, oh, this is the following. I was just chewing. Yeah, so you could see like, like the food doesn't have a bone in it, so you could see a good bone. You were just doing that in reverse.

What? Yeah, oh yeah. Going up like that. God, when you look at humans like that, it's so creepy. Like how do I wear acks just not break every second? It's just literally like a stack of bones. It's not even connected to each other. The human body's really stupid.

Like, everything you need to live is right here. It's pretty fucked up. It's like, oh, air, blood, you know, water, whatever. Oh, just put all the same place. And the thinnest, most wobbly part. They're putting it on the weak spot. Yeah, blood. Like, it does seem like blood. But you have blood, like, you have like your giant artery right there. Put all the same place in the thinnest most wobbly part putting on the weak spot. Yeah

See what you get blood like you have like your giant artery right there to feed the brain hall right yeah It doesn't know when you agreed as you go further out everything I just thought of a hot and then you're like oh, yeah, you need blood in your head Tell though it seems like trying to break a skull would be pretty fucking hard to do like around bone like that It's just like they seem to survive quite a bit different It's a different Gavin's video. So, what are we getting to gross here? No, every time I think about it, like, there's nothing that grosses me out more than seeing someone's throw-kitslet, like on any television shows. What's the topic that we got on? I don't know. What I love doing that, or you know, at some point, in this podcast, I'm just gonna happen. I used to. Well, they've done tests on the capitol head, whether they, whether they can hear you.

I don't know if I believe in all that. Yeah, Yeah, so they'll chop a head off and it'll spasm and like eyes and lips go crazy. And then it'll calm down. And there's an experiment where a guy just kept shouting the dude's name. And he went like, and he just looked to his eye. So they had to calculate hated a guy for an experiment? No, it was like in the past when people got beheaded.

They just decided. I think I remember one where they said that the guy was going to try to blink his got beheaded. They just decided. I think I remember one where they said that the guy was gonna try to blink his eyes as long as possible. Yeah. And for getting to cap. Apparently this guy, every time the guy shout his name, it happened twice.

He opened his eyes and made eye contact and then shows eyes and it happened twice. And then he was just dead. How are you dead instantly? Well, because you only die when there's no oxygen left in your brain, right? This is second. Once all the blood drains out. Yeah.

Well, the oxygen in the blood, yeah. Did you guys hear about the girl? I think it was posted on Reddit today. The girl who she fell on the icy creek and she was underwater for 65 minutes, I want to say. And after two hours, they were able to get her to a hospital and they started warming her back up with a heart lung machine, which apparently I didn't know this. When they give you heart surgery, they will suppress your body temperature. And

when they do the, they pump the blood through the heart lung machine, but then they put your body temperature way the fuck down because it's loads of your metabolism down. You don't use up all your glucose. It prevents like you having permanent damage, especially brain damage. I didn't know that. I read that in the article. So they used the technique of warming the blood back up. They like basically inserted two needles and do her, I guess, their femoral artery probably.

They said they went to her groin and pull her blood out and were warming it up through this machine. And she just, after about two minutes, opened her eyes. So she wasn't drowned. She just got really cold and died. Don't know. They were treating her for hypothermia. So she wasn't drowned. She just got really cold and died. Don't know. They were treating her for hypothermia.

So maybe she fell in the water and somehow didn't inhale the water. I didn't think about that. Or was floating. Yeah, because if she was under the water, that's what she would be doing. But she was after two hours, they revived her. Like she was dead for two hours, they revived her.

She was like, I think two and a half years old at times, now two years later, at least the article was two years later. She's had the only person to be revived after that long period of time and have no neurological ill effects from other people. How long did she sit? She's now probably about four or five years old.

Oh. Jesus. The point where the article even pointed out that medical journals call it miraculous, which is a weird word to read in a medical journal. Yeah. Yeah. I'll try to get the actual story though,

because while I was talking, I wasn't looking it up, so I'll look it up now. So the guy who blew a hole in his brain with the... What is it? What's going on here today? What have you been doing? I was just thinking of another medical miracle. I've been thinking about blowing your brains out. Oh, you're talking about Phineas Cage.

Yeah, and for what I understand, that's like, that's been overstated over the years. He was, that's a fucked up accident. He was, he had like some kind of blasting powder that he put in a crack. Yeah, he was making railway time. And he was tamping with a steel pole. He was tamping the blasting powder into the rock crack and it went off and then fired this thing that he's holding straight up through his head.

Like it went through the front of his head. Well, I think what he was doing, he was looking over his shoulder, talking to someone. Don't know what it was? Yeah, it went up his cheek. Ugh. And then out the top of his head, it just blew open his top. And then he apparently walked to the physician with his injury.

And they said it permanently, like he had a frontal low injury from what I remember. And it permanently changed his personality. He was a nice Christian godfiring man as they would say back in the day. And after that, he became this miscreant, ended up dying a bar fight, I believe, or something like that. I saw it from that. I thought it'd go better over time.

The other crazy one that always reminds me of is the Russian scientist who stuck his head in a particle accelerator. Oh, you need a electron to go through his head, right particle accelerator. Oh, you need a like a electron go through his head, right? Right. Yeah. How do I feel? He lived, like it deformed him for a while.

And like he lost like hair in the section where it went through. Yeah, but like an electron, a particle and boom. It was happening in space all the time. Like on the astronauts always getting peppered with tiny stuff. Like they look at the wall of the shuttle and there's like little holes that went through it like a million miles an hour. Like micro-media showers, yeah. And it's like through the helmets and stuff.

I think it's like, it's much more accelerated in a particle accelerator, like much more focused. What made him do that? I think he didn't realize it was on. Okay, so here's the two I learned today. I learned to do a two and a half-year-old girl, Michelle Funk, should be easy to look up, fell into a creek and was submerged for 66 minutes.

When rescuers arrived, she didn't have a pulse and was not breathing. Three and a half hours after that, a three-me, three plus hours after that, her blood was warmed. When it reached 77 degrees, Fahrenheit, she came back to life and is still living to the stay. My God. Three hours, she was dead, but no heartbeat. And then they just like said, they wander up. She's brought came back to life and is still living to this day. My God. Three hours she was dead with no heartbeat.

And then they just like said, they won't grow up. Sprawded back to life, she just... Like the guy who had read about it, the doctor had read about articles of them using this technique on open heart surgery when they have to use the heart lung machine. And he thought, I'm gonna try to do that if anyone ever has hypothermia. And then this little girl shows up with hypothermia and he talked to the parents, talked about the risks. You know, he's saying, if we do bring her back after three hours, she's probably gonna have huge neurological deficits

and they were like, it's our only option, do it. And she's a perfect person. Big fact to that. I would imagine so. I would imagine so. Longest documented immersion with an intact neurological outcome. Tracey, it's a New York Times article.

It's really cool. It's a new. No, it's two years ago. Oh, this was published July 26, 1988. It was a New York Times article. It's really cool. It's really cool. No, it's two years ago. Oh, this was published July 26, 1988. It was just linked today on Reddit. Oh, that's right. So I'm just gonna be careful when you read that stuff. How in the hell, I guess New York Times has gone back

to their ad log. So she put that stuff online. It's not enough news anymore. No, you're mine. Yeah, so she's gonna be like 30 or so, right? She's gonna be chugging along. Let's see how she's doing. The, no, maybe we don't find out.

Maybe we should shoot in the bus. So how about that? I'm gonna just do that. On the Austin subreddit today, someone posted a video that they had took with a VHS camera in Austin in 1996. It's like they're driving around town, looking at different landmarks.

And the thing that's most shocking to me about that video is how little traffic there is Oh, cuz no it had moved. Oh how little traffic there is in the video in 1996. I think I just didn't have a lot of views I was like, well, it's a video Yeah, it's weird. It's like an 11 minute long video or so. I shot a drive by like tower records. Oh, there it is Yeah, yeah, that's the beginning of the video But yeah later on they drive like down like through downtown And it's like there's like one car in front of him. Yeah, that's that's Austrian right I think one dude was Scottish. Oh Austrian and he's downtown Austin the camera directly in the sun

This is a bike campus. It's gonna be a matter to know Okay, so that's 24th Street holding the wall right and it's it's right under the left under Guadalupe and now they're heading down towards what is tower records is now long gone. Anyway, this is boring for everybody just about. There's no cars. There's no cars anywhere. You could park in the parking spot right there on the drag. He's the lowest camera man. No, he's new Metallica is on sale. But it was it was really interesting just to watch like how less crowded it seemed at the top. Was it weird for you to see that scene in the day five trailer where there was no cars

in the highway? Yeah, that's a, that's unnerving. Downtown Austin, it's weird to see. Yeah, this because, I mean, I posted that in the Austin subreddit. I posted that because I guess that. I said, hey, we're doing this due apocalyptic series.

It's based in Austin. Thought you guys might appreciate some of these, like shots, these digital shots of Austin. And then they were like, and I just linked to them and they were like, get the fuck outta here, Ristrate. They were like, fuck off. Does Austin hate Ristrate? It was like, it was enough to like, keep it down.

There was like, it's not a very traffic subreddit. So it was like, there was 40 upvotes. There was like, 15 downvotes. So just like, but there was somebody was like, get out. Why didn't they like it? I don't know. Most people did. Most people were giving it.

Because we talked shit about the Chili's at 45th of the market. And the Lake levels. And the F*** and Lake levels. Thank God they finally stopped talking about that goddamn Chili. I love the awesome. Somebody posted in there, they had an image or gallery of it. So. You're gonna say he posted his receipt.

He called it a bucket list thing. No, no, no. I thought it was just a receipt as well. It's a gallery. Oh, then it's food, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's like a whole, like, it's like a bio-pick of this guy going to goddamn Chili, so. Anyway, this is really specific. Nobody else in the world gives a shit about this.

Let me, in that case, let me read this. One reminder, this episode of the RESTeed Podcast is brought to you by Casper. Casper's an online retailer of premium mattresses for a fraction of the cost. Casper is revolutionizing the mattress industry by cutting the cost of dealing with resellers and showrooms and passing it savings directly to the consumer. Casper's mattress is an obsessively engineered mattress at a very fair price. Casper combines two technologies, springy latex foam and supportive memory foam to create

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$50 towards a mattress purchased by going to Casper.com slash rooster teeth entering promo code rooster teeth. It's Casper.com slash rooster teeth, promo code rooster teeth, terms and conditions apply right there. Click on that. Biomatrus. Click it. What? So I'm talking about.

So I want to apologize to Phineas Gage. Apparently he, that was something my biology teacher told me in seventh grade that his personality changed a lot. That's nothing in his Wikipedia entry says his personality changed anyway. He ended up dying from epileptic seizures. So. I heard it the same day.

That is personality changed dramatically, right? Really, crabby after that. Maybe it's politically motivated Wikipedia edit. So is there nothing sadder in the world than hurting yourself while you were asleep? That's pretty sad. I was out, like I mentioned, I was out of town for a couple of days.

And I guess like for some reason, like while I was asleep the first night I was there, like I like twisted my neck or my shoulder weird. And I was like, just from being asleep, I hurt myself and like even now being asleep. Right, it's like three days later, four days later, I'm like, I feel that. Yeah, I was.

I think I know something worse than that. What? Farting yourself awake. Does that hurt? Does that give you a rigged thing? It doesn't hurt, it's just sad. When you realize you woke up because you farted. You know, nothing woke you up except your own fucking ass.

Your own fucking ass. Your own fucking ass. Was it the feeling of the sound? The sound. I think you're saying it was the smell. Ha ha ha. It's like, the sound woke you sound. I think you're seeing it with the smell. Ha ha ha. It's like, the sound will queue up. It happens a lot.

It happens a lot. It happens. You wait yourself up with fire? I'll look. I'm having a different time. Do you have a different problem? I don't. Are you trying to use this as a segue?

It's a little bump. It's a boom. Do you have a small anus? I don't know, maybe. It definitely won't make me a beast, do. Is it average, Aynas? Diyama? Like, my shits are the shape of a pencil.

Is that, is that what does that indicate to you? Is that good or bad? It's like little Play-O stars. Do you prefer shits that put straight on your anus? Or do you like your anus to do with a tool? Why would you prefer? What are you looking at? A dream. I regret it. Would you like them? You're anus to do with the talk. Why would you prefer? What do you look at? A dream.

Over a credit. Would you look up? I looked up ship average anus diameter. Oh my lord, why? I was curious. Why did you do image search at per... It goes from like, don't look to go see like the Wikipedia entry. And it's just like pictures of assholes right at the top.

Oh no! Oh my god! There's gotta be few left competitions about that. Oh, I Did not need to see that So I told the story at kind of funny live too this happened to me in San Francisco And I was sad that what you saying to you is in the second kind of funny live as well both actually We did a live-rachy podcast with the kind of funny guys at kind of family. I have two. So I had a hotel in San Francisco and the night before you know you could order room service on that little paper that you hang on the door.

Yeah, oh, it's like a certain time breakfast. And so I was like, all right, I'll put it for 8.30. You know, I got to wake up and start getting ready around nine. So I'll have breakfast come before that. It's like the greatest thing ever. It's great. And usually they're pretty on time with it. It's pretty awesome. They're either like at the start or like sometime in between that time period. breakfast come before that. It's like the greatest thing ever. It's great. And usually they're pretty on time with it. It's pretty awesome.

They're either like at the start or like sometime in between that time period. I wouldn't trust it though with you around. You probably switch my breakfast for someone else. Probably. So I put the thing on the door the night before and I went to bed and I woke up maybe like 8.15, started getting ready. And I was like by the entrance of the door where the closet was, like looking at clothes I wanted to try on for that day.

And I ripped the biggest fart I like ever have in my life. And the second it was over, I heard a knock at the door. Oh, really? And it was the room service lady. And she like walked in through it into my heart. She had worried that she, you just worried she like got there too soon. She did get there too soon. That's a mental thing.

She was 10 minutes early. Oh man. So you had it all get it all timed out. 10 minutes is all it takes for you to dissipate. Yeah. If it was like 829, would you have held it in? Probably. I was like, she might be here soon.

So does she push your food through a cloud of your own fart? Like did you really like fart particles end up like infecting your own food? Probably. Like just take it back. I don't know. Don't take it as good as it is. Oh dear Lord, what do you think?

Like, I mean, if you were gonna hotel though, you're used to a lot of humanity, right? I mean, like when I leave a hotel room, my MO is, I clean the hotel room just so I don't leave anything behind. Like I end up throwing away a bunch of stuff and all those, like they leave all those fucking binders about shit you're gonna do in the city or all the service of the hotel.

I like jam that in the desk drawer as soon as I walk in the place. Why? I just don't want, I don't want you any of that stuff around. Because if I see that stuff laying out, it's, it's something that like my brain says, it's okay for something to be there on the top of the dresser or wherever it is. And I don't want that. I want, when I walk out of the room, I want to look at every surface and they're all empty and I haven't fucking left anything behind. You look at the room and like hide the eye and then the lamps under the table

I take the light bulbs I kick the air conditioning unit out of the wall Kick it down on the parking lot. Did you ever hear what I did to Gavin? I do that in airplanes by the way, too Especially international flights you rearing all the shit out of the pocket and put it in the overhead bin So annoying and then I put my my bag on top of it. But then I have a pocket all to myself and I have their fucking magazine, their goddamn sky mall. Well, the safety thing,

they gotta have to put that back. They have to put the whole thing back. So annoying. It's fine. It's good. You forget to put it back in the next one. I don't know how to get his life best out. I only do it on international flights.

I don't do it on like every flight I'm on. Only on international flights. Cause I want the fucking pocket. I feel like I get irrationally angry. Like, what are you putting in there? Stuff, I got things. Other than your phone, what are you putting in there? I don't want to leave my phone to the plane when I get off.

Put your phone. It's all the crap in there. In your pocket. Passport? Put your passport in your bag. I have the pocket. It's all yours. It's all yours.

It's all mine. By using the pocket, you're asking for trouble. Nah. It's good. Got earphones? Yeah, I got it. And it's pretty clear. It's all yours. It's all mine. By using the pocket, you're asking for trouble. Nah, it's good. Got earphones. Yeah, I got headphones. I gave my phone. Laptop, bottle of water. Yeah, it's a 12 hour flight, dude.

Come on, I get it. I put my headphone. You're gonna do it now. You can do it now. You're gonna do it now. No, I'm not taking that stuff out. I'm not an animal. You know what I do, Hito, when you put a water bottle in there.

What? When you put a water bottle in there, and it like, for some reason pushes out eight feet onto you. I don't know why a water bottle takes up that much space. It just ruins the illusion that you actually have any legroom whatsoever. I had a guy do that, he put all this crap in my pocket. No, see what? Yeah.

That is animal intolerable. How did you get your shit out of you? Well, he was already sat there, like I just sat down, I had double of everything, I was like, hmm, this guy's going empty pocket. I get irrationally angry when I sit on a plane and there's like the previous passengers boarding pass in the pocket.

I don't know why. That drives me fucking crazy. That name on it too. I'm like, oh, I know who you are. I know where you came from. What are you going to do with that information? I don't know, nothing. Get mad at them, if my head.

Because they look trash there. Well, that's, I mean, the stuff should have cleaned the plane. You hope. You should say what I did to you at the hotel room. Yeah, so let me read this real quick. Before we get too far away, the section on Phineas Gage where it talks about the change of his personality after his accent.

It has a whole section we compete about. It's engaged display significant changes in behavior after his injury But the nature extent and duration of these changes have been too difficult to establish only a handful of sources give direct information on what gauge was like Either before or after the incident the mental changes described after his death Were much more dramatic than anything that was reported when he was alive So it's kind of this urban legend became after he died that like oh, he became totally different person or anything And of course I just passed that along what?

150 years later. So, talking shit about him. Good for me. Pass me one of those beers. Thank you. Preferably the one that I don't need Bernie's bottle opener for. It's not still in there, though. You outlive Phineas Gage.

Congrats. What? You outlive Phineas Gage. He died at 35 years old. Oh, good. Congrats, dude. I mean, bad for him, but good for me. I'm so around. So I had a really fun time at kind of funny life.

I thought that was an absolute surprise. You did a really good job. They put out a podcast this morning that talked about kind of funny life and they were praising you very highly. They were praising me? Well, now I'll listen to it. They said if you didn't have a career with what you're doing now, you'd be a great stand-up comedian.

Did I have a lot of fun doing that? That was a lot of fun. Did you like prepare stuff? I was fully prepared. I had 10 full minutes that I was, how long did it take you to do that? We even did it in the rehearsal as well. I did, I did.

Well, I was still working some of this stuff out. I mean, it was like a hunt, you know, it's the first time ever, really. I said it was my second time, but I was counting like, post some public speeches that I've done, which aren't really like, that's not the, too militatively they add up to one.

They do add up to one. That's like 1200 people. I didn't want to pretend like it was my first time speaking in front of a crowd. Like I thought that was disingenuous, so it was my second. You get up at RTE, I can't really, there was like a sole calculation in my head,

but that was actually the first time I've ever done stand up ever. And it was so basically it's 100% new material doing that. So that was like, who knows, but it was a good, very good crowd. So on iTunes, I think they're posted somewhere, but it was a good, very good craft. Salah on iTunes. I think you're posted somewhere. I'm sure, right? Do you get the money? No, I'm going to post on YouTube. I think it's a money.

What was the host of the event? So that's all worked out. Someone on on Twitter here says the next podcast we can hear about how you're stuck in another country because you lost your passport and phone on a plane. Listen, that's why I fucking put the stuff in the top is because I don't want to lose my passport and my other stuff. How about a store game? I don't know why you need your passport. This is the same thing as the hotel.

I want to look and go, there's the seat, there's the pocket, nothing. You know what my passport is on a flight? It's in my bag above my head. What if someone goes through your bag while you're asleep or steals your stuff? No. I mean, you can't do that with your PC pocket as well. It's all harder when it's trying front of you. I've been on flights where as I'm trying to get off the plane Someone has reached up and grabbed my bag out of the bin. Oh, yeah, when I call them out

I'm like, hey, hey, that's my bag. They're like, oh, sorry They put it back and then don't grab another bag like they just get off the plane. Yeah, that must have happened once only It's happened once but still let's leave one time too many. I still can't believe someone tried to steal Bethany's laptop at the airport that one time. What happened there? I really. They said it was a, the person claimed it was a misunderstanding and they grabbed the wrong laptop

at the security checkpoint. Oh, they didn't have a laptop. They did have a security checkpoint. Right. But then it's like, well, then where's your actual laptop? Right. It's like there's no other laptop. It's like, it was a person having a laptop.

Well, that's the confusion. I had it. I had a dude. What the fuck up? But they took it and they had to look at security footage to find the woman in the airport. Apparently they have security cameras at airports. Go fucking figure at the security checkpoint. What a, that's amazing. I had a guy pull my bag off the conveyor belt after the X-ray machine and I went through after him and I saw my bag was already stood up. I was like, why is my bag already on? What's he doing you a favor?

He thought it was his bag. So I was like, all right, so I just grabbed it. And he was like, hey, hey! And I was like, it's my bag. And he was like, oh. Any apology? No, he just said, oh. People don't apologize for anything.

It's amazing. He's probably embarrassed. Well, it's just said, oh, geez, I'm so sorry. People don't apologize for anything. It's amazing. He's probably embarrassed. Well, it's just, oh jeez, I'm so sorry. I didn't want to have the interaction. I didn't want to say, did you put my bag off? So I just took it. It's your bag. It was my bag, so I didn't chew it about it.

Sam, wait you Canadian to do that. I would be like, I'm sorry, I think you might have taken my bag. You're not sorry. Because you did something to me. Why are you saying sorry? Because what if it is their bag? What if my bag looks like their bag? Bernie's first time ever on a podcast apparently. Take it take it easy. Dremel, you threw the phone out of the room

It's just a beep. It wasn't fucking ringing phones one little beep. Why are you hotel room? That's a chime. That's the airplane chime That's why is that the sound I'm sorry I brought it up really want to know. I'm sorry Why did they decide that specific sound is the chime? Is it your specific airline? Are you talking about the seatbelt on sign? Right. What is the tune they play where it's like, boop boop boop boop. It's like the two chime.

Yeah. It reminds me of a, typically that's it. That's like a call on the, there's one where it does it twice and it reminds me of home alone. There's one that signify like things to the flight attendants for the pilot or pilot to those flight attendants

That we don't have to know on my flight today my light button on the remote control the lights two rows behind me What Great, they sound effect there YouTube I think I told the story I think I tweeted about this better until the story in the podcast Oh, she made the maid walking on me shit didn't tell the story in the podcast. Oh, she made the maid walk in on me, shit. That was the story. Oh.

I was leaving my hotel room and I saw that I didn't have one of those, like, do not enter signs on my door and I couldn't find it in the hotel room. So, Gavin was staying in the room next to me, so I just took his office door and put it around mine and it left. Oh, remember this. Yeah. And I thought I was safe to take a poo with the bathroom door open,

being the only occupant of the room and the woman walked in and saw me pooing, facing her, like some bogs that are to the side. She just got a view of this. And I literally shit myself. It was surprise. And I literally shit myself. What? It was surprise. And I, you know, closed my legs up.

You asshole. I'm on the way back. You're gonna get me back for that someday, aren't you? Yeah, we did. It's gonna be a lot of fun. Yeah, that's true. On the way back from the UK a couple of weeks ago, I was watching the Inflite Entertainment.

And it was like a 10 hour flight coming back or something like that. And I was watching. Yeah, I was off the plane from England to be here. Yeah, well thank you, champ. I was watching the Revenant. And we got to the point in the flight where they dimmed the lights. I was like, oh my screen's really bright.

I should go through the settings. I'm gonna dim it a bit, because it's, you know, really jarring to look at. So, you know, I'm going through the settings and I'm like, hitting dim. And I'm like, oh, that's weird. The little bar for the brightness isn't going down. Like, the screen's getting dimmer,

but the bar's not going down. And I just totally dimmed my display. And I was like, oh, shit. Where was the plus? Where was the plus? And I was like, oh, fuck. And I couldn't find it. So I was like, I was looking where was the plus? Where was the plus? I was like, oh fuck, and I couldn't find it. So I was like, I was looking at other people's monitors like trying to figure out where it was.

And then I was like, I was in some weird sub menu that I didn't know which sub menu. So I like, all the layout was different. I was like, fuck, I was like, two back in this little in Japanese. Two hours into a 10 hour flight. I essentially just turned the brightness all the way off and just couldn't use my,

what you gave up. Was it a remote or a anything that you could have used? No, the remote only had volume and channel change. They usually have a brightness setting on that. Brightness was only on the display. Oh my God. And it was like, fuck. I mean, I'm sure a flight attendant could have like reset it somehow now.

Well, I was, I don't know because I know on some planes, they have, they can't reset just one. They have to reset like an entire section. Yeah. And I don't want to be the asshole asking about it and force them to reset a full section of the plane because I was stupid. So it was like five minutes into the end of the movie. I just like folded the display back up and just sat down like,

all right, you know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? But didn't you just try pressing that again? The button, I pushed, yes, I pushed that button several times and it did not work. I sat next to turning on the flight over today and I paused my movie because I was doing something on my phone. I was like listening to something and I realized I could hear her movie really quietly through my headphones. I was like, I can hear music now and I looked

over at her and I was like, oh, it's a bit in ten-club of a field lane when there's loud music. I was just listening to her movie really quietly. I'm sure you just couldn't hear it through her headphones. No. I mean, yeah, I'm sure. That wasn't it. 10 Club of Field Laim's really good. It's out on, I think, on, like, on demand and blu-ray.

Yeah, and I enjoyed it. I hadn't seen it. It was, I think when it came out, I saw it, right? I saw it like, on opening nights. Like, one of the few movies I find, I actually went outside on opening night. Yeah, I saw it like on opening nights. Like one of the few movies I found, I actually went out and saw an opening night. I found, I didn't talk about it on the podcast because it's a difficult movie to talk about without getting too much into it or giving too much away.

Yeah, you really just shouldn't talk about it. You're just gonna see it. You just just go see it. It's just good. I'll watch it. Yeah. And it's not very long as it's only like an hour and a half or so. Really?

I think it was like two. I heard pop star was really good. That just came out. pop star was really good. That just came out. Pop star is really good. You saw it, right? Yeah. And, yeah, I didn't do 12 of the box offices.

We didn't. That's really strange to me. Yeah, I probably do. Good heavy video. It's really, really fucking funny. Loads of people, right? Loads of people in it. And we released the Lonely Island after show.

Yeah, I'm getting worried that like, only like big blockbusters can be those huge Marvel movies. Yeah, Marvel movies, Disney movies, essentially. You want to do Star Wars in there as well? Yeah, I think pops are only to like $4 million to the box office this weekend. That's right. Yeah, that movie, that's like the perfect mid-category movie, right? It's not a blockbuster, not a small indie movie.

There should be that healthy middle and just nothing. Yeah, it's crazy, it's crazy. I can't imagine how much that movie cost to make either. I'm sure it costs a significant amount of money to make it. There's a lot of it. I think the Groover costs like $10 million. Well there's a lot of people in pop star. They're not for a long time,

but still a lot of people got to deal with. There's something on the internet that I think you would really like, if you're not already doing it, I'd be surprised. That's not going to make it. There's something on the internet that I think you would really like, if you're not already doing it, I'd be surprised. It's like a fantasy football. But we did it in broadcast very briefly. Movie theaters. Very briefly.

Then I think everyone's asked that we get a movie. Yeah, you have basically, you're the owner of a theater and you have a certain amount of money and you have to fill each theater with a movie. Oh, that's a great idea. And you could do like two theaters, have this movie, three theaters have this movie, or whatever, and you could choose indie movies or like big blockbuster films,

but obviously those costs more. And then depending on how they do that, we can at the box office is how well you do. It's a great idea. It's really cool. That's cool. Maybe that's stuff like that for years. That's just sounds super old here,

but before the internet was a big deal, BBS is remember you dial into a BBS, do you ever do that? Gus and then they'd have like fake stock exchanges. Yep fantasy stock and league. Yeah, and then movie stock exchanges to where you could buy I forgot about the movie stock one. You get to buy and sell movies essentially. What did you first telegram say? Shut the fuck up. That's what it said shut the fuck up Gavin stop you knew Before he was conceived. Yeah, I could feel it. It was it was in the works You can on rich teeth for half your life Right, yeah as of the age of 28. I have that's crazy. You know you know what half of my life half my life half his life

Is with a ruse either well, I mean just I was I didn't work a half my life I got you I'm aware I know we didn't hire you when you were 14. You tried. That's fucking crazy. You look, you knock like five years off your looks by shaving your beard. Make hate says she doesn't look at me now. I'll just tell her to stop it. Because you could see more of your face? Yeah. That's how you're on it.

Well, she just doesn't like being older than me. And does she doesn't like being reminded of the face? Ah. Okay, make sense now. If I had to, I wouldn't look at your face either. No, I wouldn't either. Never. It's not a good thing. Never. Do you like looking at your face? No I had to, I wouldn't look at your face either. No, I wouldn't either. Never.

It's not a good thing. Never. Do you like looking at your face? No, in fact, I got mad at you. I got mad at my face! What do you mean mad at me? I got mad at my face the other day. That same flight coming back from London.

Piece of shit! Fucking heat you. I had to go to the bathroom and then after I was watching my hands and I looked at myself, I almost never looked at myself in the mirror. But I looked at myself in the mirror, you know, and then airplane bathroom was like this far away from it. And I looked at myself and I almost never looked at myself in the mirror. But I looked at myself in the mirror, you know, and then airplane bath here like this far away from it. And I looked at myself and I was like, I've got an H spot in my forehead.

A what? An H spot? Like a liver spot? Do you? Yeah. Where's the temple right now? It's like right there right in the fucking middle. Really?

And I got so mad at Maryl. Why? So it's like, she never told me. Maryl, she tells you. She't mind makeup every day before the podcast. I don't even know when a bitch would have to make a podcast. I'm a makeup artist, identifies each hideous blemish. As soon as we landed, I slapped her. I was like, why the fuck didn't you tell me I have a liver spot on my forehead?

What do you do about it? What would you do if Mary was like, Hey Gus, you know you have an age spot on your forehead. How do you feel about that? I just feel like decrepit. I feel like you would be like, hey Gus, you know you have an age spot on your forehead. Yeah, nice. How do you feel about that? I just feel like decrepit. I feel like you would be like, fuck you! Why are you pointing that out?

What is she saying? She said she never saw it, which is probably the best line she could have come up with. She came up with that the moment. Good job. I don't know if she's right now in here. It's gonna call though. Do you do that? So yeah, I did get mad at my face.

It was like a bird. Fucking pecking at it Banging your face to the bathroom here dude. I there's some people I know that like Airplane bathrooms. They're horrifying to me. They're absolutely though. I hate them. Is it because of the violet flush? No, it's cuz like I'm like you must deal with this all the time Gus. There's this like there's the commode Then there's this like slanted ceiling that comes off the commode. Yep. And it's like, I have to like go like this

to use the toilet or like hunch way over to use it. It's not good in there. You're like leaning your head on the top where the curve is coming up and like trying to take a piss at the same time. Yeah. It's awful. It's like two inches below it.

Oh, because you're standing up. Right. Oh, right. Yeah, Barb. I was like trying to figure out what airplane bathrooms you've been using. I suppose I could just sit down, but I'm not doing that. That seems to be great.

I don't sit in a plane book. Yeah, and I read a horrible story one time about the I'm the world your head all over. The water is in those systems. Guess we talked about this in the back. Oh, yeah. Like you've never in a million years drink out of the faucet in a airplane bathroom because apparently those are

it's not portable. Horrible. Is it non-potable water but you wash your hands in it, right? I mean, it's like, well, there's also sanitizers. I bring sanitizers and super soap in those things. Yeah, I don't use the water in those. Did you see, were you on the podcast when I asked the India question, the big India debate, about going to the restroom and washing your hands?

Yeah. You're on there, okay, okay. I want to know people's opinion of that, like, which would you, would you wash your hands? Yeah. You're on there, okay, okay. I want to know people's opinion of that. Which would you wash your hands? And then we go into the argument about penal gems or other gems. Yeah, what you'll see, I don't. A few would get super excited about it. But I want to say, but when you talk about

a kind of funny live too earlier, and you were just talking about Meg the Egg, they did a series of their love and stuff podcasts with different personalities at Ruchitiv. a series of their love and stuff podcasts with different personalities at Ruchitev. It's a very short podcast about one topic. It's called love and stuff. They saved all the love and sex stuff. Love and sex stuff.

They saved all the ejaculate ones for me. I did two different ejaculate ones. About ladies' squad. No, your audience. Oh, about top. There was one about whether or not it's okay to ejaculate on your woman's face or where it's okay to ejaculate on your woman's face or where it's okay to ejaculate on her.

And another one I think about swallowing, which is not how yet. What were your answers? Yes to both. You want it on your face? Yeah. It's good for the skin. As long as you're clear ahead of time. Yes.

You have to specify. But they didn't communicate with your significant other. They did an episode with Meg, which is how to take sexy photos. I guess if you're going to be like, I haven't listened to the episode yet. But if you're going to be like, you know, sexting somebody and sending them some cheeky photos, how to do that? How to pose right and how to take a nice sexy photo.

And of course, I read comments about it. The whole debate was that the article title and the thumbnail, because it was one of Meg's sexy photos, they sing it was all clickbait. But it's like, what does clickbait mean? Because I'm not sure I'm clear on the definition anymore. Because clickbait to me means they try to like get you into an article with something,

and then the article's not about that at all. That's what I think so too. Like it's like, be in switch. Like if Meg wasn't in the video, or if it didn't have anything to do with that. Yeah, I mean, it was the topic of the video and the thumbnail, they were criticizing the thumbnail as being clickbait, but that's a sexy photo that she's taking.

People now want the thumbnail to just be a still from the video. Well, okay. Well, I got accused of clickbait. Because maybe they thought it was gonna be in the video. I think he's of clickbait on my last slow-mo because it was Dan using the drill for eating corn. And we put ketchup over it,

so it would actually spew out some liquid. Right. I don't think he's of clickbait, because it looks like blood. I was like, but that's just a still from the video. Like that's in the video. And also, I didn't put it into the video. People don't know what it means anymore. People just don't know. Like if you make it something that's in the video. And also, I didn't put it in, look like that.

People don't know what it means anymore. People just don't know. Like if you make it something that's intriguing, that's clickbait. Whereas I think of clickbait as being like, it's lying to you. It's lying, yeah. It's a bit in switch.

It's a bit in switch, exactly. Wait in switch. That's what I always looked at as a. I totally agree. That is the correct definition. Yeah. What is nice about having someone's spath on your face that you like?

It's just like the sexualization of it, I guess. Have you faced? Of just the whole act, like, finishing on- It's supposed to be like it being not sexual. Well, it's just, I don't know, it's like- It's seen as like a dirty thing. Hmm, there you go. It's a dominance thing, I think.

Okay. Like, a barber does not break eye contact. Like that was a total dominance thing. I was genuinely curious. I wasn't trying to make you like make a joke or anything. I was like, I was fascinated. So yeah, I was trying to make eye contact now. We were talking about the play in the bathroom earlier.

I mean, we think about this other story I read. I forgot if it was earlier today or yesterday about how there was Malaysia Airlines flight from I think I wanna say London to- Malaysia? People gotta stop. Maybe Kuala Lumpur? Somewhere, yeah Kuala Lumpur. Where they encountered turbulence so bad,

they were in A380, big Airbus plane, double-decker. Turbulence was so bad, it destroyed parts of the cabin on the inside and people had to go to the hospital and I've got some images from it. Really? Oh my god. Is it video? So it's so bad, it destroyed parts of the cabin on the inside and people have to go to the hospital and I've got some images from it. Really? Oh my god. Is it video?

Pull it up. I don't think it's any video. Oh. Oh, this ice on the floor. Oh my god. That must have been awful. What is the TV? People must have been screaming.

Yeah, that must have been the worst. So what we're looking at, if you're listening to the audio podcast, we're looking at like, just like the different departments that they have for storing food and everything, a lot of those that come loose. It looks like someone's TV. And this stuff. They're just stuffed out in the aisles. So, they didn't take down the plane or anything. No, they say it was just extreme turbulence. And that's why they always say, even if you're asleep and the seatbell's sun is off, leave

your seatbelt on. You could be thrown out of your chair. When I was flying back the other day, I keep talking about fucking flying. When the other day, we were connecting in Houston. And when the plane landed in Houston, and we were taxing, and we're still obviously on the taxiway, and the plane stops. And then like probably 10 or 15 people got up and started opening the overhead

being and getting their bags out and like started making the way to the front of the plane to the flight and it like had to get on the intercom and start yelling like you know the C-Belt sign still on we were not at the gate like you guys need to put all your shit back up and go sit down. Might as well be at 36,000 feet you're still not getting off the plane. Right and they're like they're like I'll stand there for a while and the fight ends Like sit down Put your seat belts on like what the fuck I Hate when it comes to that one flight ends have to yell at people at passengers

It's like I could do it that too common sense I have flight attendants are I don't fly attend the yellow flight attendant today He was pushing his food thing down the aisle and she was pushing hers but she was on the other side and he was like you need to be on the other side of that and she was like what you need to be on the other side of the car. So she was like oh can you just let me buy and then I'll turn around and he's like nope go to the other end and turn around. So she had to then come back on the other side. But in my head that was more dangerous,

because she could now get trapped between them in turbulence. Whereas if she's pushing the cart into the cart, then that's fine. But the guy was really annoyed at her. Maybe because it's dangerous for passengers, you could cart between it. I guess. Yeah, maybe there was to be a buffer. Yeah, but there was no one between them. Well, there's someone who could get out.

Yeah, I mean, you'd be a fool though. Yeah, but just like the same people who get up. What, in a fault on the taxiway? Yeah, that's no one between them. Well, someone could get out. Yeah, I mean you'd be a fool though. Yeah But it's like like the same people who get up on the taxiway. Yeah, it's the same thing. I mean you just wouldn't get up I'm gonna say we can send I sent you guys the picture the other day, but I came back. I think it was from kind of funny live I was coming back from San Francisco. I flew Virgin America for that a lot of you Best airline I've ever flown. Okay, people say that what why what's the what's the story there Why do people think it's so good? It's just the the staff are very friendly They're they seem to actually enjoy what they do the seats are more comfortable Just the lighting in the plane is nice. They're purple. There just seems to be more room to even though there's not

I don't know how to explain it. I never flew a virgin. I would suggest it. You know, they got bought by Alaska, right? Didn't they? Yeah. Yeah, it's weird to me. Anyway, people, especially people in San Francisco, like kind of funny live, they did a whole segment of the show where they mocked the safety video from the Virgin America. I don't know if mocked is the right word. They just performed it. Did a lip sync battle. Yeah, they performed it. Yeah. But I think it was like, it was like enough that the audience understood what they were doing. Like it was, it's a very specific safety video

that they have on the airline. So it was like, wow, people in San Francisco must fucking love this airline. Anyway, I was coming back and on my seat was different. So it must have been there. It must have been coming from LA. And we were coming into Austin. I was trying to race the latest thunderstorm because I didn't want to get delayed anywhere.

And so I took an earlier flight. Was landing in Austin from LA. We were coming down. Weather was kind of picking up. And it was getting very, very humid. And sometimes when you're in a plane, the vents on the side when they turn the air conditioning they'll be like water vapor that comes out. It looks awesome.

It looks great. It looks really cool. It looks like a fog machine on the absolute lowest setting. And that's not going anywhere, just staying in that little one area. Yeah, and it's just like that. This was crazy. This was like every vent in the plane.

And we're in the air, and it's as we're descending. Usually when we're sitting on the ground, they turn it on. This is as we're descending. Usually when we're sitting on the ground, they turn it on. This is as we're descending. It just starts pouring out of every vent. And I was like, well, I'm glad I've seen that before because I know what that is. But I mean, it went on for like a minute before people

started to legitimately panic. Like, they were, and I knew what it was, but so I was watching everybody. I was like on the 28th row, it was way back in the plane. And I was watching people and it's funny how people Don't want to raise a stink about something if they're not sure if they should be scared about it or not They're just kind of looking around like, huh, they don't want to be the first person. Yeah, like you see that It's like yeah, that's crazy. It's like a smoke is coming out

I mean, it was a lot like you couldn't see the ceiling at some point. Wow, but it was also like evaporating immediately Like it wasn't filling the cabin or anything and And so it was, and then it was like, then somebody started to freak out. And then other people started to freak out because like, dead people. Freak out how like yell. Just like, what's going on? What's happening?

And they're like, where's the flight attendant? And like, looking around, I was like, and I was to the point where usually I will like, kind of add to that anxiety. But I was just like, I was just showing the people around me that I've, that this is happening. Why would you add to it because it's funny we Don't funny for those people not I didn't do it in this situation

But you know in the past like if if there's like a bumblebee or interbulence It's like I'll say I fly all the time I run into turbulence all time. This is not a big deal Then you hit the next bump and you go whoa Then people get a little bit that's kind of of fun because then there's that face on the dude who's like saying goodbye to pictures of his kids on the flight next to, doesn't say my ex was on a flight one time. No, my T.A.

The turbulence was so bad that the overhead bins opened, like not all, but some of them opened and like luggage came out. Like that's how I'm like, I can't imagine the amount of turbulence it would take to do that. Yeah, just like the constant violet shaking. Can I take something that I've done

on a plane like twice in the last year? Shit yourself? No. Come yourself. No, I do the thing where I refuse to get out in the aisle. Come yourself. That was only once.

And it was on the plane to Scotland. I, with the plane lands, I don't get in the aisle. No point. I'm just like, I'm opposed to it. And if I, oh, this sit there and let people clear off and clear off and clear off and I'll just sit through on my phone. And then I'll get up and I'll go. And to the point where some people who were in the

robe behind me go, are you getting off? And it's like, I'll get off, yeah, in a minute. Go ahead. And then let them clear out of the aisle. And then when people are finally just going row to row, then I'll get up and do, grab my bag and everything. Because otherwise, it's just, why stand in the middle of the aisle? Like, like a bunch of shoes.

Yeah, bunch of, yeah, bunch of, I never understood it. Like, you guys sit there for maybe five, 10 minutes. Yeah, bunch of. I never understood it. Like, you guys sit there for maybe five, 10 minutes. If I'm sitting on the aisle seat and I feel pressure from the person sitting next to me, and I was like, I could sense that they want to get up and get their bag, so I'm just gonna get up. That I get.

Sometimes I can never sit on the aisle. Sometimes I'd bump my bag just one right back if there's no room, and I'll always get in the aisle to get it, otherwise you'd be trapped. You go to get in the early. So, there's like kind of a nonchalanteness to that. And I've ruined that twice in the last year because I've been sitting there waiting for people to go

and then finally it's clearing up. All right, I'll go now. And I go to stand up, I have an unbuckle my safety. Like, have you ever done that? Yeah. And I go, it's cool. And it's like, it must look awful when you do it. Because you go to sit down and you're like, it looks like

jams you back in the seat, you're like, oh, maybe a lot of people. The last time I did that, I really needed to pee. Oh, did you really? Yeah. Because I was just holding it. And I was like, I'll pee when I'm like, yeah, and I just yank until my bladder,

I was like, that, not feel good. But I felt the bulge in my knob. Oh. Oh. Oh. Like squeezing the end of a lot of balloon. Yeah. So you're talking about like the condensation on the plane.

I got to video people freaking out. On a recent flight, I was flying in my wife's city next to me and we had just taken off. It took your message if you want to airplay. Yeah, I'll find it. Okay. And there were storms and there's like no big deal, whatever. You know, we're taking off in the storm and it's raining like crazy. And you know, we're climbing, we're climbing.

And then like all of a sudden I felt this crazy, huge updraft under the plane. Like, I could feel myself like... Like, I could feel it in my seat. So you got mushed down in your seat. I got mushed down. And then my face must have changed or something, because Esther told me, she was like, what was that? What's wrong?

I was like, no, no, no, that's just a huge updraft. Like, I've never felt one that strong. And it's funny, I guess, when people know you fly a lot, like they'll look at you to see how you're reacting to something. Yeah. Because you know it's normal, what's not? Right. I'm more terrified of flying than I've ever been in this.

That's after it calmed down a bunch. Like that's like at 50% of the road. Are you planning to send it to the TV? I'll play it to the TV. Well, it's actually, I don't feel like it's as impressive. Oh, yeah. Because it's like 50% of the level. I've finally got to the point. I'll play it to the TV. Well, it's actually I don't feel like it's as impressive Oh, yeah, because it's like 50% of the level again finally got to the point where I could record it Why couldn't you before? The pocket we were just sending we were descending you got it. Yeah, you know your plate. Yeah, I'll reply

But I thought I should record this because I think I sent you the both of you's I didn't get it I thought I should record this because I think I sent to you the both of you's I didn't get it I sent to you. I sent to him. I sent to you guys You sent to me? You got a you want me sending me? I sure looked at now And it's pouring out of the side vents and the top vents. Yeah, I see it But that's it was like double that intensity for like a full 15 minutes Just that look really cool. It looked really cool. It really did it looked like a full 15 minutes. Just, that looked really cool. It looked really cool. It really did.

It looked like a fog machine on the medium set. But then you know, like I said, it evaporates immediately. Like it doesn't like, it doesn't like fill the can. It didn't smell like burning wires or anything like that. Do you get most scared every time you fly? More scared? Why? Well, just like based off chances.

Probably. Well, I just flew a lot this year and I've never been more scared of flying than I was today. Well, no reason. I keep falling asleep on flights and waking up thinking I'm gonna die. Oh, really? And I probably nodded off about four or five times

at every single time I woke up, heart was racing that the plane was crashing. I don't know why, I've flown so many times. I shouldn't be scared. Do you think it's a probability? Like based on the fact that you keep... Ah, I'm just like, in my between states of just waking up, I'm very rational.

Maybe. I was like, freaking out in my head. Maybe you're just having nightmares. Maybe that's how you die. I don't know what that means. I'm convinced that I snore on planes and that every time I wake up on a plane, that I woke up because I was snoring.

I have walked into my self-ops snoring. Have you? Yeah. It's embarrassing. But farting. What is your... What's the established etiquette was snoring. I have woken myself up snoring. Hi, B. It's embarrassing. But farting. What is your... What's the established etiquette for snoring on a plane? Like, what do you do? Do you just push the person?

That's it? Yeah, just leave him. Just let him fucking snore away. Put his head up and get over it. I never have heard somebody like complain about being on a plane and somebody was snoring. It's, I feel like when it happens, it's very brief. It's very quick.

It's not like someone's really going to town. Yeah. What percentage of our audience do you think is never flown? Um, it's just five percent. It's just like completely alien to a lot of listeners, do you think? But we talk about flying a lot. I guess we do. Yeah. I want to read something and then I've got another flying story I just thought about. Go ahead. Um, that is the flying podcast. This totally the flying podcast. Well, it was the gross podcast first and now it's the flying podcast. Um, that is the flying podcast. This totally the flying podcast. Well, it was the gross podcast first, and that was the flying podcast.

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I bet you didn't even try. I just made a grunting noise. It's going to be super easy to do it. Oh, it's hard. Oh, God. It's so close. It's like blowing the gif. I Can So close it's like It's gonna go Point it on yeah

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molecular packaging. So when I was going down to... Oh, dude, you're face. There you go. It's Jay. When I was going down to Cancun, we were boarding the plane, right? And I got an upgrade to first class because I fly a lot with the camera. To Cancun?

What? Yeah. So... So, the flight had been delayed because of weather in Houston. And then finally, I just happened to be walking by the boarding area, and I was like, all right, we're gonna start boarding. I was like, okay, cool, I'm right here. So I walked up to the front,

and I was literally the first person in group one to board the plane, right? Never happened. Never happened, because I don't want to deal with that. It was purely a luck thing. And so, we're starting, anyone with strollers, you can come up and board first. So of course there's like two families with strollers,

and they get in front of me and they're boarding. And like there's a woman behind me. She like taps me on the shoulder. And I turn around, look at her. And she goes, are you group one? I go, yeah. And she goes, if you're group one and you're the first person to lie,

why are those people boarding in front of you? And I said, well, that's pre-boarding. Like, yeah, they have strollers. She goes, I didn't pay for a premium ticket to have those people boarding in front of me. And I was like, was it Esther? It was some Russian woman, a very thick Russian accent. And I was like, well, I just turned around. I was like, I cannot explain this situation to her. And she's like, I cannot explain the situation to her. She's like, I can hear her talking to her husband. He's like, I'm gonna go ask him.

I'm gonna go talk to him. Like, why is this life? That guy's life, dude. Has she never flown before? I don't know. I was like, oh my God. I was like, what the hell is going on? And I can hear the husband like, no, just let it go.

Just let it go. It's okay. And she's like, wait, listen, we pay for these tickets. I don't understand why they can board in front of us. We're group one. What are they? And I was like, oh my god. And like she would not let it go.

Luckily, it was only like two families that they got on the plane very quickly. And they were like, okay, and now group one. And then like she got on the plane. I'm sure she didn't even have to see them. I feel like when I haven't done something before, I'm not ever sort of, I don't know, overly, I'm always like very cautious overly, I'm always very cautious

because I've never done it before. I wouldn't be like, this is barlegs. I thought it would be like this, all confident, like, never like that. People are crazy. People are crazy. Yeah, that's why I turned around. I was like, okay, you're an amazing person.

I cannot help you. I like that. And you had the interaction just ended as you were looking at it. And you're just like, I was like, I can end this right now I can turn around I'm I pay for a premium ticket to talk to crazy people all day. Yeah, so buck off It was I always said buck off. I fuck buck off. Yeah, I said buck off. Yeah, the I had a thing with time to partner

I don't know The shopping cart thing we're head of lady yelling at me. I don't think so. The, what happened? Did we miss something? What? Well, you said buck off, that was crazy. But then you just never justified why you said buck off.

I did, and I said buck off, and I said, that's what I said buck off. Because you thought I said buck off. I said buck off. I mean, we can listen to tape, but maybe I misspoke and said, let's play the tape. Let's play the tape.

We'll all live back. We'll fucking Gavin and his love of flubs. But there was a lady one time where I was getting in my truck and I had the kids with me and I had to get the kids in the truck. And then I went to go get in my car and my shopping cart was there and it was like, oh shit. Grab my shopping cart and put it in that like the place where you put all the shopping carts.

It was like two spots away. Yeah. And across the aisle and then came back on my truck, started to pull out, then pulled away. And the lady pulls in my spot after me and she fucks. She's yelling. She's yelling at the top of her lungs out her window and like gesturing with her hand.

So I stopped my truck. I stopped my truck and I get out. And she's out yelling, something, I couldn't even understand when she was yelling. And I was like, did I back into your car like when I backed out of the space because she was waiting in the space? And then she starts screaming incoherently,

it's old lady, it starts screaming incoherently at me about me going too slow and messing around with the carts playing around with the carts to like slow her down. Or whatever, I was like, I was just putting my cart back. And then there's a guy, all of a sudden, there's the carts, playing around with the carts, to like slow her down, or whatever. I was like, I was just putting my cart back. And then there's a guy, all of a sudden, there's the guy, her husband, just kind of older guy with her, and he just sitting there.

We like yell back and forth for like, probably 45 seconds to a minute. The guy's just sitting there the whole time like this. Like this, not engaging with me at all, and I'm thinking, dude, this guy's fucking life. What a nightmare. I mean, she was just like, she was livid about the fact that I took the time to put my foot away.

Do you owe her to like, hurry up and get out of your spot? No, I know it's waiting for you. I had no, I don't even know how long she was waiting there. I don't even have any idea, you know? And when you put kids in a car sometimes when they're younger, it can be kind of a pain in the ass, but nothing crazy, you know? Yeah, she was absolutely livid.

And I remember I said, I was, she made me mad. And I was like, the point of like, I was like, I was like, ladies, you have no idea who I am. I mean, you're just yelling at people in a parking lot. This is what you're doing is going on yelling at people. And then all the time the guy shows up

and he's just sitting there like this. And I was, you know, I'm looking at him thinking I could have a problem here. Yeah, this is a life we chose. Yeah, he was just like, I could just like read on his face of just like, fuck, this is like 40 years of, it was fucking bullshit.

One time I was driving downtown and there was a car in front of me that saw an open space and they decided to back into it in parallel park. And, you know, there was another lane I could have gone around but I wasn't in a hurry or anything and my wife was in the passenger seat. So I stopped, I give the guy plenty of room,

and I stop, and I start to turn and talk to my wife, and he tries to back in, he messes it up, he pulls out, I look, he's still going, he tries to back in again, messes it up again, pulls forward a little bit, then opens his door, and turns around and looks at me and yells, are you gonna go around, are you gonna sit there and watch me all night? I was like, you have,

like the guy has plenty of space, I'm not honking, I'm not mad. I was like, okay, I'm just gonna go around. Like he must have performance anxiety, or something. I don't know what I do. Okay, there's no reason for you to be that mad. It's fucking crazy.

At the fact that you can't pair a little park, I'm not even acknowledging it. Should have just started paroscoping it or something, more people could watchoscopy, but it was something that was more people could watch. Yeah, but people freak out. People really freak out in their cars. People really freak out in their cars, dude.

People become different. People have cars. They become really different people. It's fucked up. Have you fallen asleep in your Tesla yet? Like that guy? Have you seen that video? You know what I wanted to do?

I wanted to make a video. So me and the boys after we saw the video, we went out on a road together, like an empty road and we tried to see what would happen because the Tesla, why don't you explain what the video is and now explain what we did. There's a video of someone in traffic took with their cell phone of a Tesla next to them

that was, look like there's an autopilot mode because it seemed like the driver was asleep and the car was, like, racked out, like he said, off the side. And the car was still, you know, inch and forward and keeping pace with traffic. And so it seemed like the guy was asleep and the car was driving itself.

Yeah. That's what I took away from that. But they can only follow cars, right? So would it just follow them to that drive? So I should probably, I was thought about I should make a video for this, like an RT life or something, but it's like, once again, it's like, do people really want to see this?

Yeah, that's good. Or people are just gonna be like, oh, you know, complaining about the fact that I'm posting a video about my car. The, so me and the boys went out, and after we saw that video, cause they were asking me about it, and I said, well, let's go try that.

So we went out on a, on a empty road basically. We turned it in all the drive mode, and we're just going along. And what the Tesla does is like every, probably about every minute to two minutes, not sure what the algorithm is, but it'll say, you need to touch the wheel. Like you have to physically put your hands on the wheel.

And you can sometimes just literally put your hand and just touch the wheel like that. And it goes, I haven't tried putting my dick on the wheel. I will try that and report that. Was it like, a passive or it feels the movement of the wheel? I think it's just, I think it feels like just touching it does it. But I know definitely someone who doesn't register

and then if I just give the wheel like a little nudge, then it definitely does it. I don't know that would take it out of autopilot. No, it's really, the nuance of that is actually really impressive. Cause like, you can leave an auto drive mode and go, no, no, no, go this way, stay this way and stay this part of the lane,

you can nudge the kind of car over. Like if you see the lanes, you see the lanes about to split, for instance, and you go, I wanna go left, you kinda nudge the car to the left and then it goes off the left but doesn't come out of auto drive. But then if you grab it and turn it

with any kind of like real force, it immediately drops out of auto drive. But if you just, going along, I said to the kids, okay, don't worry, I'm here, I got my hands right here, but let's see what happens. And the car beeps at you, and then about a minute after that, it beeps again, saying, maybe probably 30 seconds, it said, you need to touch the wheel to maintain your speed. And then it just starts going down.

We were going like 65. And the speed starts going down, starts going down, starts going down. And then it starts beeping, beeping, beeping, beeping, beeping, like non-stop beeping at you, over and over and over again. And then it gets down and when it got down to like 35 miles an hour, it turns on the hazards and just starts getting over to the right. So I looked it up and it's like the reason why it does that assumes that if you can't touch the wheel and you don't respond

to it's cause it assumes you're unconscious for some reason, you know, it could be anything, it could be like a seizure, it could be, you know, heart attack or it could be just fell asleep on the road, which is a normal thing. Choclank. And it just a normal thing. Chokewank. And it just pulls you over. Chokewank. Little auto erotic, X-Fixiation almost got through it.

Didn't quite get through it. I have that a gift up. I don't know if we can, if we cut to it. Do you have it? It's beautiful. You have. They do it out. Oh my God.

I even know where his head is. Oh my look at that. My dog. He's rolling along. And the car will be fine, especially bumper to bumper traffic. Is there a mod yet, the less you control it with an Xbox controller? I can with my iPhone, I can pull it out of a parking space

and stuff. It's cool. I can use the summon feature on it. Yep. There was another video last week of the week before of a guy who used the summon feature on the car while his kid is in the passenger seat. Oh, and the kid starts freaking out

but the car is like kidnapping him. Oh my God. He's like Tesla stop. Tesla please stop. He's like trying to talk to it. Tesla why? That's scary. It's really fun.

I'm actually worried that is there a model that will put a red light going across the front like this? It'd be cool. They changed the body style. Have you seen the new one? I don't like it as much. They made it look like how the Model 3 and the reveal.

They've made it like all plastic across the front. And it's like there's no like pseudo grill or anything like that. Get it up. I want to see it. He can do it. He can, he can. What are you going to learn to drive? I don't know, what is it? Yeah. He can do it, he can, he can do it. What are you gonna learn to drive? I don't know.

Yeah. But I saw a crazy thing the other day. I can't, I can try to find the video, I saw it on Reddit. But it was a, it was like, these people at a street light, at a stop light, at a freeway of all places. And they were all out and yelling each other, and there was this woman and this guy and a truck, and then there was these two really tough-looking dudes.

And of the couple, the guy keeps getting in the truck, and the woman keeps getting out of the truck and screaming at the two guys. Who the fuck knows what they're yelling at each other about? Screaming at it. Guy gets out of the truck, gets his girl back around the passenger side, he gets in the car, he tells she opens the door, she almost gets out of the truck gets his girl back around the passenger side. He gets in the car You tell she opens the door. She almost gets back in the truck comes back out yellow with the two guys

You don't do guys then like pointing at her boyfriend pointed them Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it goes on for like a minute and then something happens and the two guys just start beating the living shit Out of the guy and she immediately is like going Stop stop with screaming. It's like what the fuck did you think was gonna happen that was in Houston she immediately she immediately went to that squailing at the top of her lungs screaming oh my god oh my god stop it's like just getting your fucking truck and drive away it's god damn before and after the model is pulled up yeah that's top one's new one the new

ones on top. Oh, no, it doesn't look as sleek. I don't like that as much. I don't like it as much either. And it looks like something's photoshopped the front. Yeah, yeah, it does a little bit. That's enough of that. It looks like a fatter version of the Tesla.

I went to his on a bus, and I could hear a woman doing that like hysterical screaming and I couldn't figure out what was going on. And then this dude stumbled pasta and like, it bashed his back on an ATM and another guy swung an axe. Oh, what? What into the middle of the ATM screen? I don't know. Like trying to kill the guy and then someone else tackled him.

Was he trying to bust? Was he trying to bust? I was on a bus just driving through a town. Oh, oh, I see. And I could hear. I mean, I'm kill the guy. Holy cow. And then someone else tackled him. Was he a bus station? I was on a bus just driving through a town. Oh, oh, I see. And I could hear. I think he went on the bus, I was watching him. No, I could hear a screaming, like through the windows of the closed bus.

It was like, oh, it's going on, and it looked like something from a movie. I actually looked to see if I could see cameras, but it wasn't, it was just. Yeah, it was like an ax. It was like a fire ax, like a massive ax. It was crazy. That's crazy. That's crazy.

That's absolutely crazy. The craziest thing I've ever seen like that is one time, Jeff and I were at a bar. It was kind of a sketchy bar down in South Austin. And it was like this really shitty bar next to a liquor store. And we pulled in this liquor parking lot. So we parked, going into the liquor store.

And as we're getting up to the door of the bar, like how long ago is this? This was 15 years ago, maybe anybody else with you? No. Like the door, like from the inside of the bar, the door gets kicked open and like these dudes come out and they're fighting, like, you know, like almost like a cartoon around, like rolled around on the ground, like fighting, like the dust kicking up and then like they stand up and they're like staring at each other and one of them has got like a chain

in his hands and like just start spinning it like oh shit Find the chain on the ground when they were no the car he already had it and the guy like you know went into grapple him to like Keeping from like swinging it around and we were like yeah, we're we're not going in there No, we just like walk right back to our car like let's get the fuck out of here I know that either one of these guys is like the Budweiser represent The County who just happened to be in the like your store get the fuck out. Yeah. I know that either one of these guys is like the Budweiser representative of the county who just happened to be in the liquor store. Get the fuck out.

Yeah, places off the chain. Yeah, but Jeff had a significant other when we were younger, who would fucking start fights. She would like, on the street, like if somebody looked at her wrong, she would be like, hey, fuck you asshole, like in the middle of six street at midnight. And wouldn wrong, she would be like, hey fuck you asshole, like in the middle of six street, at like midnight, and wouldn't Jeff have to be like,

listen to you. That's awful. I mean, I really, honestly, I've never had to deal with that before, but yeah. I would not want to deal with that. No, that if I stamped on that stuff, do you think I would explode out of the top? Yes, it absolutely would.

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is it not the most convenient thing? Dude, I love it. I'm the kind of guy like they said at the beginning of the ad read where I just like, I just don't want to go shop for clothes. I just don't want to do it. I just like the whole idea of like going to the department store or wherever and like standing there and like changing into like five or six outfits is like, it's horrifying.

It's finding them first. That's the thing that always drives me crazy. It's like looking through like, out of this entire store, what are the things I'm gonna pick? Right. And it's a nightmare. Just, they do this thing with truckloaders.

They tell you, you got a trunk on the way and then you're like, oh, let me see what they picked. So they go through and you look at you like, I don't fuck it's in that, don't say that, don't say that. Okay. Oh, you could do it before they send it? Yeah, you got a trunk on the way and they're like, oh, let me see what they picked. So they go through and you're like, I don't fucking send that, don't send that, don't send that. Okay. Oh, you could do it before they send it. Yeah, you say that and then you're good to go and then off it comes and you get it and it's good.

You know, it's some of it's pricey. I mean, you can go for like t-shirts and stuff, but I mean, obviously if you're doing it in the home, it gets a little bit pricey. But I'm always shocked, it's like, I'm just like out of touch with how much clothes cost. Like, I thought jeans were like 40 bucks, you know,

that's why the pair of jeans cost like 30 or 40 bucks. That's like in my head, how much a pair of jeans cost. And it's like, then I go to the store and it's like, there's jeans like 140 bucks for a pair of jeans. I think I just don't shop in those expensive. Holy cow. I learned that. That's like, it's hardly spent any North.

North. I'd like to appreciate those better quality jeans over time? That is true. That is true like when I was younger I would not spend more than 30 40 dollars on a pair of jeans and now if I find like the perfect pair and they're like a hundred bucks It's like I'll splurge on that because they'll last me for years and years and they like are usually a better fit So we have a friend. His name is Aaron Marquis He says we as weird things he talks about with jeans like he doesn't wash his jeans ever He puts them in the freezer instead of washing them. Yeah, are you aware of this?

No because I've stayed at his house frequently You know just we have We go verse and cool and I've never once seen his jeans in his freezer. So I don't know what he's on about Have you ever seen him wash his jeans? I've never seen him wash anything the freezer. He's laundry rooms downstairs One gets like a chocolate stain off your jeans. I don't like he's eating a lot of chocolate chocolate stain. That's character You don't think he's eating chocolate Oh You guys know each chocolate I eat tens of chocolate. I'm also a clumsy motherfucker

So I get stuff all over myself all the time and I go have to watch everything. Like kids that clumsy age, they're like, that we were in the kitchen this weekend. It doesn't end, Bernie. We were in the kitchen this weekend. We were like, we do this thing where we try to have like a culinary experiment every weekend. Like we try something different. And like this week we were, anyway.

So they were just knocking shit over. Like they were like, so they knocked over something, they were picking up something, knocked over three other things. I was like stop stop stop stop You know what's walked into achievement hunter with like a burrito something and you fumbled it all over the room All over my dad was actually like you were just like and Accurate but every Gavin you love would be like Stephen, I will remind you that you do as many Stephen things as I do.

I have been my notes, I don't even know I mentioned the podcast, there was the time that we were together and you got fooled into thinking your reflection was another person. It was doing everything that I was doing. But that means it's you, that you reflected. You like said hello to it and tried to let it go to the door first.

Did you see the drunk Russian guy who did the same thing? Yes, look if you're walking to a door that was glass and someone wearing the same clothes as you Also reached with this symmetrical opposite hand you would know it's a reflection. Yeah No, but it the whole point was it is that it was a person. It was a natural person. No It was your reflection. that it was a person. It was an actual person. No, it was your reflection You thought was a person you got it flipped. No, it was a real person and what I open the door I was like ah What are you talking about? This is the one where you thought your reflection was was a different person at these two different

Is this is that two different ones? Oh? God, where were we the one I'm thinking of is when I thought it was me, but it was somewhere. Let me look at my notes here, what is this for a flesh? I'm thinking, well you do that. Oh shit! The shortcut to a search for stuff on the PC is the shortcut to close it. On the mag version. And that's a fucking good one.

I'm gonna get you a copy of what I'm talking about with the Russian guy. Oh yeah. What is this? It's the Russian guy who's looking at the mirror. Let's try Russian guy who's looking at the mirror. Try this the guy by. Look, this guy's having enough time to like bust out his phone and record it. Oh my god. He's like talking to him.

What is he missing by age? To be fair, you don't get a lot of flow to see mirrors like that. It's very misleading. It goes on for a lot of people. And then he comes at the guy who's feeling like puts the camera down. Like it's like, he starts to, I guess he starts to feel bad. I was like, I need help this guy. Yeah. There happened a lot of times when I'm at a restaurant or a store.

And there's a mirror on the wall. And it looks like just another section of the restaurant. Well, it's a bad sign. They make you look bigger. Yeah. Yeah. It makes them a busier. Yeah. It's like how I have a mirror right above my dick. Makes a little busier. Yeah. It'sier. It looks like there's more people on it Dead rise before if it was above your dick you wouldn't go to see your dick Yeah, I see your face down. It's just one long so dead rising for so you got leaks or something that they're gonna

Have this game it's a rumor and it's supposedly a remake. Oh good. This is a rumor section podcast The first one. Yeah, oh That's the way that I know I'm super excited about that. I love that. Three was impressive. There's a lot of zombies Yes, very vast. I don't want that. I like through a lot. I like the closed mole I liked you know, Dead Rising the first one was one of the Games that was credited unofficially as being a cause of the red ring of death, because it was like, you'd used so much of the processing power

that it overheated those original Xbox 360s. It also had unreadable subtitles in standard death. Oh, yes, I loved Deadrise. So I guess that's the image that's been leaked. Oh, definitely a full. So good. Oh, is he got a camera? Is he got a camera?

He does. So that's Frank West. Yeah, bloody. Did you guys also see or hear about this tweet that Gabe Newell allegedly tweeted? No. Did you know? How do you know what? He's offended. Are you offended that Barbara knows? I know game information. The only reason I know about it is because I'm on the no channel that's lacking. I think Ashley talked about it. And what was it?

I gotta find it. Game Newell Tweet. Game Newell, I don't know if it's a real account, but it was like. It's usually Gabe and. Gabe and Newell, yeah. No, Gabe and. Just Gabe and.

Gabe and. Gabe and Newell. Okay. So while Barb's looking that up, let's talk about some iPhone rumors. Oh God. Stop. You stop.

First of all, what? I hate iTunes. I hate it. I fucking hate iTunes. What does it work? Because it had the music player on the phone and then it had the iTunes store. And those are two different things.

And when you want to shop for music, you know the fucking iTunes store. Now the fucking player is a storefront. And like when you try to search for your own fucking music, it's like, oh, did you want to look on the store for the album that you want? It's like, I just want to play my fucking album. And it's like, it defaults every time you go to search

for something, it defaults to Apple Music, which is a service that I don't have. I don't have it either. And it's just like, what? I don't know, I don't know what it is. Why is that the default? And it replaces all the, on the phone, it replaces all this stuff too. I'll go on a plane and I'll be like I don't know anyone has it. Why is that the default and it replaces all the on the phone it replaces all the stuff to I'll go on a plane I'll be like oh let me play this song. It's like oh, it's not actually on your phone anymore. No, but it you know Apple music

It's like what where's the song? Yeah, I didn't delete it Prick gets rid of it and then watching to stream it so you have like a bandwidth bill that's fucking crazy for the month or you're on a plane You realize oh that music's not actually on my phone. I just don't have it I just manually set it to only display a music that's on my phone. Yeah, you gotta go through all this. I like to jump through some hoops to do that. You do. You gotta go through all the stuff. I know you can do that. Just to turn into a fucking music player. Then I had a song that I had to do the other day that I had to prepare for. And I had to listen to the song over and over again.

And someone sent it to me in an email. So I was like, okay, I'm on my phone. I'll play it. It was an MP3 and then it loads the fucking quick time player up on the phone, which then after 30 seconds, fucking shuts off, and goes away. So I'm like, all right, I'll just add it to my iTunes library. Nope. Can't do it.

Can't fucking do that, because that would be too fucking simple. But also if I know the way the quick time player works properly, if you lock your phone, it stops playing, right? Yes. If the phone goes a locks, it just shuts it down. For me, it's, I choose, it was never good. It was never great.

You can never just drag and drop onto your phone like you would want to. And now it's like a pile of stacked dishes on top of each other, like each piece of shit on top of the other one. And now it's just a mountain of unstable shite. The music player is so bad. It is so bad on the iPhone, which is what,

it started as, it started as a thing that plays me in it. It's an iPod. So, add all the other shit. The podcast app, if I get, if I get on the podcast app, right? So say I'm on the Rupert's Teeth podcast, right? I've got three tabs.

I've got my episodes, feed and saved. Well, the Christ is the difference. Well it used to be one list and you could pick which ones you wanted. What the hell's three different taps for? It's garbage. It's all the same thing. Feed and my episodes are identical and saved. It's a bunch of old, I don't get it.

Who made it? It's really bad. It's like the people that are in charge of the music player are just like, they must be the lowest rank people at Apple. They're just like, just put them in fucking iTunes, just, you know whatever. I mean, it's how it already can be.

I just wanna, I mean, Win Amp got it right. I just wanna play a song. That's all I wanna do. You wanna be able to see what you have and play it. Yeah, that's all I wanna do. Just wanna see what I've got and play it. If I could revert the music app to iOS1,

before you could put iOS right. I would take it. Yeah, it didn't display the autism you could iOS. I would take it. Yeah, it didn't display the autism of the song. I didn't give a shit. It played the song that I have. Right, it's fucking garbage. I played it immediately.

Which you're gonna love the rumor about the iPhone 7 to get even further away from the origin of the iPhone from the iPod, guess what they're getting rid of on the iPhone 7? Oh, I've heard, allegedly. It's not happening. The headphone jack. I heard that song. They're getting rid of the headphone jack. They can't, I can't. And they's not a rumor. It's not happening. The headphone jack.

They're getting rid of the headphone jack. The headphone jack. And they're gonna make you have a lightning headset. So you have to plug in a lightning, a very proprietary, I assume, pair of headphones that end to the lightning case. Or an adapter that's got like a huge box on it that you can then plug a headphone adapter into.

So, uh. Or use Bluetooth headphones. Which, by the way, are fucking great. Yeah. I have Bluetooth ear way, are fucking great. Yeah. I have Bluetooth ear buds. I love them. I wish I could connect my Bluetooth ear buds to my Xbox controller, but I can't. So, Ashley got back to me.

She said it was not a real account. It was just a troll, but it basically said it's confirmed. Like, that's all the tweets said. Oh, I know. And the account was like at its Gabe in or something like that. Yeah, it's stupid. But a lot of people were thinking that it was something real. Yeah, I think that happens every year, right before E3.

Somebody tries to troll with a Gabe at it. Yeah, every year. But it's crazy, because the last new game that Valve put out, I think was Portal 2, right? Yes. Sounds right. Did they update Dota since then? D since then Dota Dota come out Dota Dota. I mean I'm sure that you updates but that you release of it was Dota 2. I'm looking at it. Okay. Pull it to me like 2010. Dota 2 was July officially July 2013. So that would have been more recently.

Portal 2 is I think 2009. I think it was that early. Yeah, no, no, I think it was like 2011. It was before. But it's just like it's crazy. So it's been like five years since Portal 2, which I'm not a big Dota player. So I mean, for me, it's been five years since the last major release. But it was 18 years since Blizzard had put out a new IP, which they put out a ton of games, but they had not a new IP since With Overwatch was the first one they put out in 18 years. That's crazy for me to think about that. They knocked it out of the park. It looks like Team Fortress 2 to me.

I haven't played yet and I know what? I know people fucking love this game. I know they're going to watch this. Oh, I'm saying I haven't been around to play it really. I might give it a go. It looks really good. I was in one last play with it and it was pretty fun. I played once, I played as Reaper. I played really, really good. I was in one last play with it and it was pretty fun. I played once.

I played as Reaper. I played as the monkey. The gorilla. Wilson, what's his name? Is that right? Winston? Winston. My kid's playing.

My kid's fucking loving. I think you should stand put it. Yeah. So yeah, Dota 2 was the most recent thing. I guess, and the lab, which is one of the good things for me. Oh, that's a VR thing. My kid, my kid, Teddy loves it. So that's a little like dog.

You know, like a little portal style dog that you like follows you around and stuff and you can pet it. When do you think the next version of the Vive will come out? Cause I think I'll get that one and not this one. Dude, I think the next one, it might be like in a haptic chair or something like that. I think we're getting closer to the matrix.

As soon as this gloves, I'll get it. Closer to Ready Player One. More than that. I guess I was gonna say, come over and play it at my house, but you have it. I've played it a lot. It's just, I don't think I want to spend $800 on one. It's worth it to me because it gets the kids using it,

and they're using technology, and they're using like, kind of cutting edge technology, so it's like, that's the kind of stuff I want them thinking about. If I had a big office, I probably would. I'd have to rearrange my whole home office. I'm thinking about building a micro ATX computer, like a small one that just doesn't have much on it, just has like one solid state drive

and just use that for a VR machine, but I'm worried that's gonna be like 800 bucks to do that. So, you ever built a micro ATX computer? It's been years, but yeah, one point. I'm gonna just, I'm gonna find a hard part about how it's find a wrong component. The hard point's getting the video card to fit in there. I don't know if you can find a correct video card to fit.

Why don't you just put it on the outside? And that's smaller with form factor. I mean, you could, yeah. But then it's just another thing. I think the whole point is to have something small. You get, there's like ribbon, long ribbon connectors for PCI. I love people who put like their components on the wall and stuff, like they build a PC that's like,

oh, so people have done it where they just have everything on the desk underneath. And the computer is the desk. It's pretty cool. It is pretty cool. It goes back to my thing about why isn't the desk part of the technology? Yeah.

All right, well, we've got to wrap up. Could you upgrade your desk every now and then? Sure stamp on this thing in the post show. In the post show. All right, well, thanks for watching, everybody. We'll see you guys next time. Bye, bye, bye. Bye. So. Bye.

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