Rooster Teeth Podcast - Is That Me? - #432

Episode Date: June 6, 2017

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It's time to put your pedal to the metal. From the twisted minds behind Deadpool and Zombieland, an executive producers, Will Arnett and Anthony Mackie comes the new Peacock original series, Twisted Metal, a high-oxane action comedy based on the classic video game series. Anthony Mackie stars as John Doe, a motor-mouthed outsider who must deliver a mysterious package across a post-apocalyptic wasteland.

If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnett, and Thomas Hayden Church, twisted metal, streaming now, only only on peacock. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. of the podcast. I'm Gus. I'm Gavin. Barbara. Chris and Gus. Before we go any further, before we go into the podcast, I want to warn everyone. Great. Good morning. That here in Austin, you know, we're doing this live Monday night for first members. There's a huge storm that's rolling in and about to hit our studio. If the stream suddenly goes offline, we probably lost power. So we're gonna go as long as we can.

Hopefully that doesn't happen. It has happened before. It has happened. It has happened. Yeah. It kicked us off right at the end once. We went, we lost power. We went off.

At a six three six, we had to go do it in the conference room. Oh yeah. But that wasn't a storm though. What happened? Oh, we blew it. No, we'll get into that. That's a whole other thing. Well, real fast before we get into all those stories.

We just have a little different, a little new. We have a new poster. We're going to be showing here. We're going to debut Patrick's going to bring it out. This is a podcast poster. And it's a limited edition poster. And the reason we're telling you about it right now is there's only 300 of them.

First members don't get notified about this poster until 5.20 PM via email. So if you're watching the livestream right now and you want this poster, you can go out and buy it right now before everybody else knows about it. It should be up in the store right now. It's up on the store right now. Will that be any left?

I don't know, it's cute. That's your reward for watching the podcast. And we brought Tobin out who made this awesome poster to talk about it a little bit. So where did this poster come from, Tobin? Like I know, I don't remember who sent it. Someone sent us this image for approval, asking us if we liked it.

And I had no idea it was even in the works. It's Bernie's idea. And he wanted to do like an apocalypse. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, he's been wanting it for a while now, I think. And then Mondo is kind of the inspiration those awesome posters that those guys do. So did you do the illustrations for this and everything too? Yeah, yeah, from scratch. Yeah. So who who is the most hideous to draw? I guess me because I'm not on it. If you're not on the poster, you can't talk.

Because I'm not on it. Shut up, Christian. If you're not on the poster, you can't talk. So how did, so what, when you, I see that we see the finished product, right? Bernie had an idea, what was his idea? Like how much work did you have to do in order to finesse that idea into like a finished product that comes out?

He literally just said zombie podcast poster. And that was it. So. Sounds like Bernie. Yeah. Not much direction at all. Obviously, John helped me, but... Why did you choose to make Bernie and Gus so big and then...

Well, they've been doing it. Although we are in the front. That's true. I feel like... And you have weapons. There's a backstory here. Is that cricket ball I have? It is.

That's a nice shot. What do I have? You have a shotgun. Oh good. Good. Because of Canada. No, because of Yang. you have a shotgun? Oh good. Good good because of Canada No, because a gang she got the shotgun gauntlets So from what I'm seeing here, I guess we have 300 available to purchase online and then there'll be another hundred at RTX this summer What yes, can I get one?

Yes, you go right now. There's probably 14 there's 14 extras Yeah, it's a really cool poster and I'm glad that we have it out here. It's an interesting idea. I like this idea of giving people who watch our podcast live a little bit of a reward or a little bit of an incentive. Yeah, we don't really do that enough to it. What other things have you worked on? What's been your favorite thing that you've worked on that you've made so far? Oh man.

This is pretty awesome. I like this one. I don't like it. It's Bernie's idea though. Why don't you give Tobin an idea? I got to come up with an idea. There was something that I don't know if you're still working on it or if it got scrapped, but you were working on something else

that you were drawing me on it. And you asked me to take a picture of me going like this. Yeah, it was personal. Maybe. That's another poster. I don't know if it's coming out. I assume it is. But yeah, he needs some concept photos for that.

You all, like the art department, and everyone who makes the merchandise, you all move to a new office fairly recently. And I walked in there, I think, for the first time today since you all had been set settled in there. And there's so much cool shit on all of the walls. And like so many cool ideas and new merchandise I see coming out. It's really, really exciting. Definitely. Yeah. Also, each poster, I think, is numbered, right, and signed. Yep. They're all numbered and signed. There's 400 of them.

But 300 in our store and then 300 in our chest. 300 in our chest. 100 in our chest. Cool. Well, thanks for coming out and for showing us the poster and introducing it, Pobys. Thanks, Tobin. Thanks, Tarlan. Bye. I was looking at that, and I was thinking,

if I had to do that from scratch, I can't do that. Could I do it in my lifetime? No. Like, could I ever, if I had to study and learn techniques for like 50 years, could I then do that probably? You would have to learn to draw. I just think you don't have the patience. You'd probably be like, I couldn't be bothered. I don't know.

I don't know. With enough practice, can you learn to be good? Yeah, absolutely. I learned techniques, but would you have the ideas and where to get framing? I think you would. I think after a lot of practice and experience doing different subject matters and different techniques and after a couple of years, I think absolutely,

you'd be able to concept something. No, I feel like singing, I don't think any amount of practice for you. Well, that's just the way you sound. I know, but that's an innate ability. Like Adam, that's like saying, I can't have blue eyes. It's like there's a lot of physicality that goes in right like the way the air goes through your nose.

Well, I think also with singing, you could learn techniques as well. I'm sure you can control it. I'm sure you can better. Yes, but I'm never gonna be like for the remainder of your entire singing. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.

Do you wanna? No. You should be an opera singer at some point in your life. No, I shouldn't. Like, yeah, I you wanna? No. You should be an opera singer at some point in your life. No, I shouldn't. Like, yeah, I'm, I'm like, I can see. Ever. The old, right now. The rap battle came out today.

The achievement had a rap. Yeah. That was really awesome. I think people are quite surprised by it. Because Jeremy did a really good job on it. He did. He was often did a good job too, singing or rapping, I guess. Yeah, I mean, he made it very easy though. He would, because he gave us all a clip of him singing

everyone's lines. And then we could just go along on top of it, listening to it. So it was pretty easy to record. Yeah, when we did the podcast, King vs. the Mad King rap battles, kind of the same way, he lays down the track, he put on the headphones and you just kind of listen and wrap along to it. It was fun, I definitely didn't want to do it, but I'm glad he convinced me. Did you see, oh so real fast, I would cover the story you talked about. At the old studio, it wasn't that we blew a breaker, it's that the electricity was installed wrong in that building. And the fuse box outside of the building? In the Anex?

Yeah, it exploded. Wasn't that the boat type podcast? Yes, that was the boat type podcast. We had to very quickly move across the parking lot too. But that wasn't the one that got taken out by the storm. Which did that. There was another one as well. I was also at the Anex, I think.

Yeah, that we got rained out. We had bad power issues there. We had one here too? Yeah. When are we a good generator? The plug-est. It's happened three times already. If we plug everything into one of those

just petrol generators, how long can we do the plug-offs? As long as you keep the petrol topped off. Well, they probably have a, they're probably as a limit how much power can output, right? Yeah, we don't need that much, I mean. A lot of lights. Yeah, but they're, we're also live streaming to the internet, which I assume.

We just have to make sure our internet stays up and see computers in there. It's a lot of power. Yeah, do you have a generator? You're fine, you're good. We totally make it happen. They power like data centers. Yeah, not good.

Tons of equipment. Obviously, they have a really huge generator, but you've as long as you've got something big in it. We just installed those Tesla batteries all over the place. Yeah, and then we could put solar on the roof. We could store and power to last like 10 minutes. Just for the power. Man, I'm so excited.

Speaking of Tesla, I'm so excited about, oh, it looks really scary outside. It does. I can, oh my god. That's outside right now of our, that's the list of literally of our studio. Yeah, we like several feet away from that. Death approach.

Oh, you can hear the thunder is rattling the studio right now. Yeah, we like several feet away from that. Death approach. Oh, you can hear that the thunder is rattling the studio right now. Can we get like a thunder mic? I mean, we had thunderstorms for the last week and a half. Yeah, it's been a busy day. It's really good to have my dog loves it. Well, I was going to get my car washed. It's covered in poop, like really bad.

And this is going to be great for it. Yeah. Speaking of the Tesla battery walls, I'm super excited about the Tesla Model 3. Have you, did you prior to the Tesla Model 3? No, I should have. I wanted to. How much do you have to put down for that?

$1,000. Oh. All right, yeah. Maybe I can just do it now. Yeah, do it. Then they're gonna, they're finally supposed to announce like all the final details in July. But we have like a month to wait.

And I'm not committed to it, right? I put it down. And then if I cancel it, I get it back. Maybe I'll do that. And I've already started to see all the spy photos. People are finally starting to see them on streets and on test tracks. So every day I go to YouTube and look for new model 3 videos. It's always like some shaky video where a guy threw a chain link fence and you see the

car on a track. So what's the difference between the Model S and the Model S is their nicer version? Okay. And the Model 3 is like the more affordable mass market one. Okay. Gotcha. Are you going to get rid of your car to get that one? Yeah, absolutely.

But I associate that car so much with you. I had that car a long time. I was thinking about it the other day. It's honestly, like, because I don't really care about other people's cars. But every time I see a Prius, I look to see if it's you. Because there's so many ones of your color, and I always look to see if it's you. It's a super common car. I have a lot of fucking Priuses in LA.

Yeah. I don't know if you've ever gotten a newbie in LA, but there's like a 99.9% chance it's gonna be a Prius. Well, I think if you're gonna Prius, you don't have to pay for like, tolls in California. Because it's electric? Right. And I think that you get like a discount

on your vehicle registration. I think there's a lot of financial incentives to use hybrid and electric vehicles. X just could you add to this new Tesla? They haven't really said it. They haven't really said yet. That's announcement they're gonna do next month. But the photos I've seen, the dashboard

doesn't have the speedometer and instrument cluster in front of the driver. Like that's just not there, there's nothing. What? All they have is the tablet in the middle. Like the model S. They said that there's gonna be no instrument cluster in front of the driver,

which doesn't mean anything to you, because you don't drive. But it's weird for those of you who do drive. Yeah. Yeah. Like in the wind shield. I don't know. Like a. Well, what? And Elon Musk has said some weird things on Twitter about it. He said that the level of autonomy in the car is going to be so high that you don't need it. And what he said was, when you're in a taxi, how often do you look at speedometer? Ooh! Which is, yeah, and I know that's why I ask you because I do you like robot cars.

Sometimes I do. If they're going real fast and I'm like, I don't feel safe and how fast are they going? That's when I look. Yeah, I look at other people's speedometers when it's even like really loud and like I can feel the wind

or it's just probably the wind. I feel the wind on the inside of a car. We can like feel the wind or it's just driving the wind. Feel the wind on the inside of a car. We can feel the wind effect on the car. Sometimes you can feel the wind blowing a car if a car's pulling us through wind. You ever feel that? Yeah, absolutely. You could sense it.

I think that's more like strong wind though. It always freaks me out when I'm just driving down the highway. And you're carrying a load. And then all of a sudden you're like, you get a big burst of wind. I mean, it's like my heart always starts racing. I like the idea of that being your reaction there. Because I'm sure in reality, you'll just like this.

If you're just like, no, I would think it would be the second one, actually. Yeah. Yeah, that's probably the only time I've ever left every time. I'm making noise like that. That's like my surprise noise. Yeah, it's because it's so genuine. I get scared. Aaron got a new car. Yeah. Yeah. I took him to it. Well, it was a way. Yeah. So he found a car he wanted to get, but it was in Houston. Okay. And there are other cars in Austin.

Yeah, I guess. And I was going to Galveston for a weekend, Memorial Day weekend to visit my sister. Which is in Houston, New York. Which is like, past, past. Yeah, okay. Houston. And he was like, It's on the coast.

Yeah, like coast, like. But he was like, oh, well, can you drop me off at this dealership above a lot? I'm like, sure. Is that why he could just drive the car? Yeah, because he was gonna take a bus to something. I'm like, sure, I have company. But then he wanted to leave it like 8 a.m. in I'm like, sure. Cause that way he could just drive the car. Yeah, cause he was gonna take a bus to something. I'm like, sure, I have company. But then he wanted to leave it like 8 a.m. in the morning

on a Saturday. So I was like, okay, fine. And he shows up on like night. He's gonna, I'm fucking show. He shows up. I'm like, I hear a knock on my door. I'm like in my underwear. And he's like, let's go, let's go.

And I'm like, so we drive and I drum. So you left in your underwear? I got dressed. I'm like, driving a drop of moth. And I'm like, you know, we can do test drive and stuff. I'm like, okay, cool your underwear? I got dressed. I'm driving a drop him off and I'm like, you know, we do test drive and stuff. I'm like, okay, cool. It's like, yeah, I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I just got it.

I got to talk him down a little. I'm going to get it. I'm like, cool. So he's talking to the guy. I'm like, all right, well, I'm going to head out, head to Galison, driving to Galison. He calls me like, like, 30 minutes later. He's like, I don't think I'm going to get it. I need you to come back.

He won't come down. So I'm like, okay, all right. I'm coming back for you. So I go pick him up and then it's like 15 minutes down. He's like, he calls back, actually, you know what? I'm going to, I think I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm like, okay, cool. I'm just eating that subway right now. And then, you know, I'm psyching myself up. I think I'm going to get it. And so I'm like, okay, cool. I turn around. He's like, that's $5 foot long, man.

And so I'm like, okay cool, I turn around. And he's like, That's $5 foot long, man. And I'm driving back. And then 20 minutes later, he's like, so I tried to get it, but I couldn't get it because my bank was closed. Oh my god. So then I'm like, okay.

So I drive back, I pick him up, and I drive him to a bus station. And he takes a bus back and I go to Galveston and then he comes back the next day in a bus whenever his bank's open and gets it. Okay, so he like basically what did he use to do for twice for no reason. Yeah, he said he did though because he had a different salesman the second day. Yeah, he got a cheaper price. Yeah, he tweeted that picture about. Yeah, yeah, so it ended up working out in his benefit because he got like a thousand or two thousand

dollars. So it was, it's like an old like a used Porsche. Some old. I don't know if I'm supposed to. If he wants, but it's like it's like a 2001. So it's like not like a new one. Yeah, he was real cagey about it. I saw him at our meeting the other day and I sat down next to you and Aaron was like,

Hey, what's up guys? And I was like, well, congrats,, Oh, congratulations on your car because I saw he had tweeted, like you said, about the $2,000. I was like, what'd you get? He was, Oh, yeah, I got a Toyota Camry. I was like, Okay, you got to go to Houston for those. Yeah. And I said something like, that's, that's a weird decision.

And he's like, Okay, okay. I'm, I got something else. He's just trying to fill up or parking a lot with cars that he doesn't use anymore. Does he still have cars over there on the... Well, I think the police car that he used to have, Oh, right. I think he sold that to Ruchitit's. He says the police car, so they repainted it and stuff.

But like his other car that he had, I think he's just gonna park it. He's here until I could sell it. Bernie's done that too. He's got like his old car's been out there forever. Yeah. There's a bunch of like parking spots are being taken up by people's old car he's been out there forever. Yeah, there's a bunch of parking spots are being taken up by people's old cars.

Fucking assholes. Yeah. The amount of waste in the world from people holding onto stuff that they're trying to sell, there's clearly people who want to buy those cars, but they didn't always know about them. And it needs to be a much more efficient beacon system for when it's like, I don't need this anymore.

To know the whole world. There's a lot. I had that with a house for a while. I was like, I need to sell this house. No, the whole world. Nice man. I had that with a house for a while. I was like, I need to sell this house. This is a very easy way. There's a very easy beacon system for that, called a realtor. Yeah.

Did it? Did it? Eventually. There was a brief period of time where I told you that I wanted to rent your house because you were not renting it to anyone. So even if I rented it for like 50 bucks a month, you'd still be making money. I would have been more profitable than what I did. And I if I rented it for like 50 bucks a month, you'd still be making money.

I would have been more profitable than what I did. And I think I remember I was like, so close to convincing you to let me rent it for like a hundred bucks. You were just like, and I'm like, well, you're not making zero. So you're making an extra hundred bucks. But then if I'm always trying to sell it, I'd have to be like, alright, get out.

Sold. Or I would make it look nice. Yeah, that happens all the time, where it's like you showing a house that a renter is in. What's the thing you're not supposed to do with your friends? Like never rent them a house. Steal them? Oh. No, never sell them a car.

What, there's something that you're never supposed to do with your people. Don't shit where you eat. Like don't be a roommate with them. Probably, I would say sell them a car. Yeah. So you never know what's gonna happen. Yeah.

There's some stuff that is always much. To ask them to take your accusation to buy a car. That should do. I've already had someone I know, like I was talking to someone else I knew about the getting the Tesla Model 3 and they were like, oh, what do you do with your Prius? Like, I'm just gonna sell it. Like you should sell it to me.

I was like, I don't know, it doesn't sound like that. That just sounds like setting up for something wrong. For something bad to happen. Like I've never done anything wrong in that car. The car's always been fine to me, but what if like I sold it to them and he immediately breaks, like, oh, the car's always been fine to me, but what if I sold it to them and he immediately breaks, like, oh, the car's fucked up, you take it back. Oh, they wear a mask of your face

and do it like pull a bank job or something. They could do that. That's way less likely. That's not the thing I'm worried about. So it's like, that's really a lot of it. The man, you could totally do that though. If you had like skin grafting, if you had fax makeup and like,

maybe just could totally pin a crime on an off-friend. If you like borrowed their car. do that though, if you had like skin grafting, if you effects make up and like majors, could totally pin a crime on an off-friend, be like borrowed their car. I'm pretty sure there's other ways to identify. The person. It's weird that the camera shows Gus Wolton, but it was Chris's DNA. Yeah, it was so crazy.

It was so crazy. But do we believe, if I was wearing like a turtle neck and black gloves and Gus Gus's face. Yeah, all right I'm like your height and your weight They aren't big no no no no no no I'm like it's spit. I'm gonna get the bank. I'm not spitting on I'm like you gotta get the girl. I don't think anyone who gets a cry of it intentionally You're gonna be yelling at someone to put the money in the bag through a mosque. You're gonna spit They're gonna shoot, but they mean,

but my spits are not gonna be collected. I could have gone into the bank myself earlier that day. That's the cover. You, you as Chris going first. Yeah, I love the night. But you may everywhere. Walking back and going. Obviously, sneeze, 11 of them.

Yeah, just like sneezing everywhere. Oh my God. The barores crying. I just love the idea of like anyone who's committing a crime going in it. Just like spit. Oh. I sold, I had a little truck that I sold,

I don't know, a couple of years ago. And you know, here around Austin, there's those toll roads. And so I sold the truck to some random person up Craigslist. And then like fucking three months later, I started getting goddamn toll roads. And so I sold the truck to some random person off Craig's list. And then like fucking three months later, I started getting goddamn toll bills. The asshole never filed a registration. He never updated it to the fact that he bought it.

Is there no way for you to file... I'm sorry, I just went off. Is there no way for you to file the fact that like you don't own the car? Yeah, there's a form you can fill out, but I just never thought about it. So it's like, so I started getting all these bills from the toll company and there's really,

like it's a whole hassle. So I just paid the toll. It was like 20 bucks. You paid them? I paid them because I was like, I can't. You worried about like hitting a credit. Right, so I don't want this. I don't want any misunderstand.

So I just paid it, then I filled out that form. Like you go to like the DPS website, you fill it out and then you like, you just don't mind anymore. Right, like I sold this truck, whatever. I have to go to the DMV, I need to renew my license. She did before expires, otherwise it's like on bigger pain.

Yeah, it expires in December, so I play it time, but yeah, it's because, and you would know this if you got a license, but if you try to get a license on a work visa, it's only valid for the amount of time your work visa is. So I can only get licensed the last to the end of the year. Yeah. That'd be bloody annoying, wouldn't it?

My expired is in December of 2017 because that's when my work visa would have expired. But since then, I've gotten a green card. But drivers licenses aren't proof of legal status in the country. Are they? Like, why do they do it that way? I think it's because, like, like technically when I had the work visa, I was only legal to be in the United States and work in the United States and live here until December of 2017.

So they couldn't. Yeah, but you don't have to be a citizen in the United States or a legal resident to get a driver's license, do you? How does that work? I get a US driver's license. I think you have to be a resident. Because I don't think a driver's license is proof of citizenship. Yeah, but you can't get one. Not citizenship, but, but you can't get one without social security, though.

Can you? Can't you? I mean, you must have to have a social security number to get a driver's license. Yeah, probably. But Social Security is a federal agency and driver's licenses are state agencies. Right, but I've needed my social security for a bunch of shit.

I needed it to get a phone. Yeah. Yeah, that's different. Is it? Yeah. Why? Because they probably run like your credit check. That's a a phone. Yeah. Yeah, that's different. Is it? Yeah. Why is it pro? Because they probably run like your credit check. That's a credit thing.

Yeah. Huh. Well, regardless, it expired when my work visa expired. So I just seem like, well, I believe you. I'm saying it's a good job. It always makes people do a double tape because at the top of the license, it says limited term. And it's like in big red letters.

So it always seems like it's like an expired or something. Can I see? Assalamu'alaamu. That's my letters. So it always seems like it's like an expired or something. I see Assalamu so didn't Trump messed with that visa suddenly today or something I have a green card. Yeah, I know, but didn't he do something to the H1B? And that was I that's what I was on yeah, I was on the issue I just saw something pop up my thing. I didn't read it, but it said that he would like someone's changing with it Yeah, I are you getting close to it?

I'm still on a let me, so. Whoa! That is loud. The fact that we get here in here. Yeah, and my car's gonna be so clean. But it's never clean. Like whenever it gets rained on, it's like dirty water. It's got like dust, particulate in it.

It's better than the amount of poop that is in my car. Or on my car. On my face. Why is that dust in rain? I don't know, there's just this. You've never seen that? Like when a raindrop falls inevitably it dries dusty. Like it dries and leaves behind like a residue. Does it?

Yeah. You sure that's not just splash from hitting the ground? It's probably just because our air is not clean. So like everything gets like lifted and the pfft. Huh. It's like all that pollution and shit. All that pollution. Am I crazy? Is anyone else feel that way?

Yeah. That's how it works. Got a confirmation from Pat. Yeah, we got science proof in there. So apparently the posters are almost sold out. Oh really? Yeah. So if you've been waiting to go and go get that poster.

Mm-hmm. There's only 300 of them. Well, there's more than that than many people watching. Way less than 300 now. Yes. I actually have a space for a poster in my office because someone wanted a slow-mo poster, someone that might, one of my family knows, but I didn't have time before I flew to England to get one from the store, so I just took my own one down.

I never put one back up, so this is a blank spot. Can you do this one? Yeah, I might do that one if I can get put one back up, so this is a blank spot. Can you do this one? Yeah, I might do that one if I can get one. All right, let me read this right here. When I'm on everyone, this episode of the podcast is brought to you by Casper. Casper's an online retailer of premium mattresses for fraction of the cost. Casper's revolutionizing the mattress industry by cutting the cost of dealing with resellers and showrooms and passing that savings directly to the consumer.

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Big thank you to Casper for making such a good mattress. I love it. I sleep on one every night. So comfortable. I still don't have one. I slept on mine last night without the sheets on it and it's still comfortable.

Why? Because I was washing my sheets and... You got two sets of sheets? Shhh, shhh, shhh. Well, I do, but I was lazy. Yeah, it's like two hours to walk. It's like you don't even put on the whole two sets of sheets. Shoes, shoes. I do, but I was lazy. Yeah, it's like two hours to what, it's like you don't even put on the whole new set of sheets just while I just swap between two sets.

So the one that's going to want to lock up like an empty bed, that's smart. I should have done that, but usually I would just wash them and put them back on, but I didn't do that. I have a question. Do you think that if enough people think you're wrong about something, are you just wrong about it?

Here's an example. Okay. So I tweeted, I was transferring the load of files, like, just moved like 12 terabytes. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. And I was like, sucks, I'm limited to gigabit speeds. And I showed my thing, which said like 113 megabytes a second and everyone was like oh megabit speed or don't you mean megabyte or like right right and it was like 90% of the replies were that and I thought I mean almost everyone thinks I'm wrong I might as well

be wrong yeah he's like I might as well yeah you might as well but you're not the difference is is difference when a gigabyte and a gigabit, which means that gigabit is like, you get an eighth of that in megabytes. I mean, there's a lot of things that people are commonly wrong about, like one of the things is the you and I versus you and me argument. Like, it's different depending on what sentence you use it in.

And there's a lot of people who are very adamant. Like, no, it's you and I, it's not. It's just like, I just felt like, because I could have gone through and corrected every single person. I was like, I may as well just be completely wrong because most people think I'm wrong. Mm-hmm.

You see, Apple did their worldwide developer conference today. I didn't see it, what did that announce? I didn't get to watch all of it, but they did announce a new iMac called iMac Pro. I've, the world has officially ended. And iMac Pro. iMac called iMac Pro. The world is officially ended. And iMac Pro. iMac was their consumer line. Mac Pro was their pro line. Now you got an iMac Pro. Do they think that putting the word pro next to it is just like, oh this is better and you'll get more. It actually does have some beefier hardware to support the moniker of Pro, but it's still like, why are you making the iMac Pro?

Why not just make a new Mac Pro? Did they touch the Mac Pro at all? No. That thing is garbage. So, I thought they were gonna revamp the Mac Pro and get rid of like the stupid, like add the ports back on there or something.

They said that they're gonna, that the trash can form factor for the Mac Pro was a mistake and they're gonna fix it, but it's gonna take time. Hey, it looked super cool. It was just, we're not really in practical. Super cool, but what made me start thinking about this was you were talking about gigabit. The iMac Pro, it just feels wrong saying it, I'm sorry.

The iMac Pro was gonna have 10 gigabit ethernet. Oh, it built in? Built into it. Because I was looking at 10 gig ethernet adapters that you can do over Thunderbolt, and they were like 600 bucks. Mm. I have 10 gigabit ethernet between different pieces of hardware, but none of it is between computers. It's like my computer to a phantom or something.

Oh, that's why I thought about it. Like when I saw that I had a 10 gigabit. I was like the first thing I thought of was like transferring a lot of phantom data. Well, I wouldn't need like 10 gigabit switch and let shit out of it. You could probably connect them directly to each other. Yeah, but my house is like cat six wired. Cat six will probably be able to support it. So I feel like if I have a root or a switch that supports that, I could just plug everything into the wall.

Yeah. How's your trampoline? A root or? How's your trampoline? Trampoline is fun. Yeah. You got trampoline? I got trampoline.

Why? For a video. Oh, and I go on that thing so much. For 29 year old, I spend a lot of time on a trampoline. I trampoline. Why? For a video. Oh, and I go on that thing so much. For a 29 year old, I spend a lot of time on a trampoline. My mainly just like lounging around on it. But Dan's been around and we've just been like bouncing around with these videos. It's like still down.

No, I left. But there is a slightly, Oh yeah, there you go. There's a slightly annoying thing is that I don't have a lawnmower, so I just paid some lawn people to come. They come every two weeks. It's like 25 bucks. But they never know what day they're coming.

And I always want to move the trampoline because they don't go under it. So I need to- You're just gonna have like a circle, I always have like a tall circle of grass. So I need to keep moving my trampoline around. So they get it. Otherwise my grass will just grow up into it.

Yeah, I'd take a long time. It's already pretty high, like halfway up the trampoline. Really? Yeah, it had a lot of rain. Yeah. And that was annoying, because it's been so stormy, and Dan's been here, and we just haven't been able to film for so long. You're so slow.

It's coming back soon though. Sure, yeah, probably. At some point, yeah, I know when we pre-tape the Memorial Day podcast. I felt like the pressure in my ears on that one. You weren't sure if you're gonna be able to make it or not, because you were worried about whether or not the day we were filming was gonna be sunny, so you could film. And it turned out that was the one sunny day.

Yeah, I felt about it. About the week. No, I was looking ahead at the weather. I was like, probably won't be in. I totally get it. You can only film so often when it's been fucking miserable weather like this. I'm at the point in my life where I definitely have control over a lot of things. I don't really have to do anything. I don't really govern by anything

I don't want to do. But I still need sunlight. So I'm always like, I really don't know what I'm doing until I can see the weather. Have you considered like getting a studio that just has like really good lighting? Or is it just that? But that's Bunt's Barbara. That's some Bunt's to get a studio and big lights. Yeah. Everything involved in doing that is very expensive. Sure. It would put me, you know,

I'd spend a lot before I made that back. Be negative. Just sell your house. Yeah. Get an apartment. Man, speaking of selling stuff, for the first time in, I don't know how long, it's been a few years.

I went to a bunch of garage sales this weekend. And I think some people don't understand what it takes to make a garage sale. Like I just looked on Craigslist, I was like, I'm gonna find garage sales in Austin, I'm gonna go to them. For a lot. Just wanna go.

Just to shop around right? Yeah. And I show up to some and it's like, some dude with like a blanket on his yard with like three things. It's like this. This is an accomplishment. So they didn't constitute. So blanket set. Right. It's like the a blanket. Don't waste my time, sir. With three items. What if like all the items had just been sold since? Oh, I showed them kind of early. Yeah, if you get there early. What were the three items? Okay, the one I'm thinking of in particular, it was, it was a $20,000 pyramid board game from 1974. It was a Catholicism for Dummies book. And what

was the other thing? It was a, oh, and it was a microscope. Wow. Pretty happy items. I'll take it all. Sure. Wrap it up in his blanket. I just want to imagine going to one of those without having something that you're trying to get hold of. You never know what you're going to find.

Like when we used to do the Drunk Gamers website, before Ristur Teeth, we had, Jeff and I had a column where every week we would go to garage sales just to see what we could find and see if we could find any video game stuff So it's like finding cool like trinkets or like old things vintage things. Yeah, it's fun Yeah, I like going to those and not looking for anything in particular. I like going shopping and not looking for anything

I've never just thought I'm gonna go shopping. I don't know what I've never done You know, I think it's from as as a kid I always like going to garage sale because it'd be a way to get like cheap toys and convince my mom to buy me toys Because there would be so cheap. I think that's probably where like why I like it to like when I was younger like I knew I could find cheap stuff Yeah, and I could get it. I know my mom will buy me this thing because it's yeah, it's 25 cents Or it's like when you're a kid. It's like that's all the money. You have like I've got a quarter. I can buy this Yeah, all of the like VHS is in super Nintendo games that I had as a kid were all secondhand. All of my games had other people's saves on them.

So, I didn't realize when I played League to the Past, I didn't realize where I was starting from wasn't the beginning of the game. I was like, I have all this stuff, I had half the shit. And then I played again for some reason. I played it again from the beginning. I was like, what's up, what's up, what's up. Why is it? I was pretty young. I was like six, probably.

It's a good game. That was when it starts on a Stormy night, doesn't it? It does. Just a night, just like tonight. I felt like what we used to do, the garage sale article for drunk gamers, I felt like we would go to garage sale so we would see video games at every sale. I felt like we would go to garage sales that we would see video games at every sale.

Like inevitably like every sale, there was something, you know, even if it was like an old NES cartridge or something. When I went this past Saturday, I felt like I really didn't see anything. It was like there really was not very much video game stuff. I went under now with like the resale market is so that like people just take it to like game stop or. Or they try to sell it online.

Probably like not in person. Digitally, you know, like maybe, yeah. I really felt like there was not a lot of a video game related stuff. I always wanted to have a garage sale because I wanted to just watch people look through my stuff and like. You should be in your house like looking through the blinds.

What? Well, just like to see like, this is shit, I can't believe you know what I'm gonna buy it. Oh, gross. Well, I just to see like... This is shit. I can't believe anyone would buy it. Oh, gross. Well, I just went into like, I don't know. I guess see what people thought, like, my stuff was worth to them. What is the most...

So would you pretend to attend it as though you're buying something? Like looking through like, hmm. I would definitely buy this. This is really nice. T-shirt. I would spend a lot of money on this t-shirt. What is the most personal thing

you would sell at a garage shop? Personal thing? Personal. Oh, God. I don't know. I wouldn't sell my underwear now What is the most personal thing you would sell at a garage out personal thing personal I wouldn't sell my underwear now because I know some people are into that you know, but like You don't know it's not like I won't go ahead wait Who was it on this podcast that told the story about their girl a girl that they knew who worked at a grocery store and a guy Approached her about buying her socks. Was that one of you? That sounds familiar.

Yeah, apparently there's someone who we know, and the audience probably knows who I'm talking about, but there was this girl that was friends with this guy who worked at a grocery store, and there's this guy like a customer that came in and told her that he'd pay her $100 for her sweaty work socks. And she did it. So she went into the back. I mean, it's good money for the sake of socks. Yeah.

And yeah, if anyone wants to buy my sweaty socks, 50 bucks, but also like right now in the Autistore, just one pair. There's also apparently like, like women's dirty underwear too, that some people of interesting taste are into. So like, I don't know if you guys have watched the oranges, the new black. I've seen the first season and a half. There's basically this whole plot line.

I think it's in like the third season where they sell their underwear, like you used underwear. Prison underwear? Yeah. So you just take them off and sell them. You don't wash them, you just... You definitely don't wash them. No, because they want the smell.

You wash all the value out. They want the smell on the crust. Crust. Well, crust. Oh. Crust. Bung crust. After I went to all those garage sales on the weekend, I went to like a goodwill.

There was like this goodwill boutique store. And I was like, oh, I was trying to, because I was in a neighborhood looking for groceries. I was like, oh, I've never seen that before into what's in there. So I walked in, it was just like a normal goodwill. I don't know why they wrote boutique on it, just to get people in.

But as I was walking around, they had a section where there was underwear for sale. And I was like, I looked at it, I was like, I can't believe they're selling underwear here. And there were like thongs and you know, like underwear that gets up in there. I was like, that, I mean, I should not be allowed to sell that. I guess it's just not weird though, if it's washed.

No, no amount of washing could remove the deep seeded. No, I like, I bet if I've washed the pair of underwear, I'm wearing right now. You put that underwear, it's not going up your vagina and ask, crack. If I washed my underwear, would you put it on? Yeah, if you washed it. Yeah, but it's like a pair of shorts for you guys.

Like, yeah, your butthole and your balls are touching it, but like. What about the crush, Bob? What about the bum crest? Some of us like the crest. I'm not talking about the bum crest. I'm talking about dried women fluid. Fudge crest.

Yes, that would create probably a Cressy thing on an underwear that's left unwashed for however long it would take to get to these men. So someone on someone on Twitter Portable underscore hb is selling you should sell your sweaty socks on sale for charity at extra life 2017. Oh no Not for the kids. That's I feel that feel, yeah, I feel like that's like, me. Like, the best I could come up with, what are my sweaty socks? As long as no one suggests I sell my dirty underwear

on the extra life. Nobody is interested in that, no, nobody wants your crust. Don't stop, it never mind. You're the one who brought it up. I know, but I was talking about myself. Usually you won't talk about your personal crest. Stop saying that.

Stop saying that. Why would you bring it up there? Because I watch my underwear frequently enough to that it doesn't sit there dirty for like days. Well, I mean, the amount of time you leave it not washed, surely doesn't affect how washed it gets. You ask me, again, I thought you were that. Well, if I take my underwear off, it doesn't solidify.

What is this paste that you've got happening? But I think if I took my boxes off now, washed them now, washed them tonight, it would, they would come out the exact same as if I washed them a month from now. Congratulations. So like if you leave, what is that? It's what you're saying, like, no matter how long you leave it dirty, when you wash it, it's still washed the same.

Yeah, it still washes the same for sure. Doesn't it? Right, I don't know. You don't think smell could like, like, suck in, like get these. Well, that's a point of detergent is to like get it out. Yeah, but you know, smell is just a little nugs detergent is to like get it out of me, you know. Smell is just a little nugs of the thing, right?

Like poo smell is just poo. Just microscopic poo. Well, when you get, you get smell that's like soaked into a fabric. For breath? Like, like pit sweat or smell or like whatever it is, the giant of smell. But like, maybe if it can, what if like,

there's, I mean, it can chemically, maybe transform it into like even something different. Well, like you spray stuff on it and that was smells like strawberries. Don't ever spray anything in your underwear, kids. For breeze. It's for breeze bad for your vagabond. Everything except water and soap is bad for your vag.

I felt even soap. What about penis? Even so, honestly. I don't know about penises. But I recommend not putting anything besides soap and very like. At what point is it dangerous to leave a penis in a vagina? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha that and sit there. Here's a question. Someone has that world record, right? Longest time. Longest time. A penis has been in a vagina.

I bet they went for like a day. What is that amount of time? Well, here's the thing is, do you get like, you know, like your fingers get wrinkly? Oh, penis. Well, here's, I mean, you would, I'm just shocked if you just like, you would soften though, right?

Because I see you would go in when you're hard and then it would soften. That would be, yeah, I imagine you'd have to soften. Yeah, you can't stay hard for that long. Because you can't even have an erection. Yeah, but what point does it have to be hours or you go to the hospital and then you'd have to take it out. But what point does it not become sex anymore?

You're inside a woman. It's sex when you're in her. No, it's like, why would you lose it? Because surely it's hot because you're in. Yeah, yeah. We're the longest man masturbation, 10 hours. I can eat that. World Strongest vagina, lift to 31 pounds. Wait, wait, wait, we're the longest man masturbation 10 hours. I can be that world strongest vagina,

lift at 31 pounds. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, question. When you say a vagina lifted 31 pounds, like, was it like a dildo with a hook and chain on the end? Yeah, where is it hooked in or is it like shoved like what? It could be the list of a giant. It does, it does not elaborate. It says, uh, it does not alabiate. Yeah, that's pretty. That's pretty good. I've thought that and I thought there's no way I would say that. It's crap.

Well, that's what I'm here for. That's a crusty joke. There's another one here I was going to say. Oh, the world's largest penis, 13.5 inches, world's largest vagina, 19 inches. And who has that record of the largest penis? Jonah Falcon, an American actor and writer. Does he still live in? Uh, it says he's a keeming blog editor. Is he single? In 2012, he was stopped and frisked by the TSA, the San Francisco Airport, due to the

large bulge in his pants, Japan's through the middle of little sector, the body scanner, the world's largest dick was selected for additional screening and then finally released. I bet it was selected for additional screening. And I bet it was released. But that would, he would, he would just bottom out every time. What? Yeah, not with the world's large.

Yeah, it was good to be teaching. 19 inches, can you go back to that? Okay, what about the giant? He said 19. 19. She'll never be satisfied with the penis. Let's eat. Oh, she was, she had to touch the end of your vagina to be satisfied. She was 7 foot 8 inches tall That's a that's a huge bitch

And I guess the match she married was also over 7 feet tall. I yeah That's about a tool baby. That's like, I imagine that it happens. To the largest baby in history, Oh my god. When 26 pounds and 34 inches in length. I mean, yeah. When did you get plenty of room for it? I think it was just right now. It became, it was so large it became tightly wedged

and your capacious tract only extracted by these four steps and belts. Ooh, belt. Do you think when those two people have sex, it looks like a scene from Pacific Ram? It's really good. You've done well, Barbara. No, those people are huge.

And that's something that I always surprised me. I always think about that whenever I'm in a crowd out in public. I look at all of the people I see as like, people are fucking amazing. It's amazing to see like the variety in people. Like the heights, the weights, the way everyone looks. It's like, and I always think about video games.

I think about like character generators when you're like starting up and you're giving, how long would it take to make all of these different people? You know what I think about this weird about people's faces? Everyone has, for the most part, two eyes, a nose, a mouth, and around shape face. But the slight differences in each one make, like you could identify a person based off their face instantly. But you both have noses. But I don't know,

it's just like the slight distinctions in each face. It's like, well, I don't think I can look more different to you. I've got a big nose too, but I feel like I have big noses in different ways. But it just seems like there's- It's like, it doesn't stick out. It just seems like there's not enough distinctions to create that amount of different people.

I don't know, like a nose could only be so big or so small. But yet there's seven billion people in the world and everyone looks different. Do you think someone else in the world has your nose? Absolutely. Like there's the exact same nose out there. Well, they have those things. I saw this video where these people find their like

real life twins. Yeah. It was just someone else in the world who happens to look exactly like that. I think there is an app or a website now for that, where you could upload your photo and it scans it and find someone else who's on the phone. Yeah, it's going to say with the rise of soul food here. Oh my God, and that would create the perfect bank robbery scenario. You wouldn't even need to make up.

You would just be a different person. You just go, you go find out where they are, and then just like rob, steal their car, rob something, go away. Jack got to return their car, so they don't know it was stolen. But you just, all you have to do is while they're like sleeping or something like that, they're picking. But your DNA would still be in there. No, I would not spit.

I'm wearing a mouth guard. That was once a picture that Jack couldn't tell whether it was him or not. It was just a guy with a beard taking a selfie and I'm playing anything. And he was like, I don't know if that's me. And it wasn't him, just some runaway. But it looked that similar to even that person.

There was once a school visiting my school. I think it was for some sports tournament. And there was a girl who got off the bus and a friend of mine saw her and thought it was me and like went to go talk to her. And I saw this girl later and there was a moment in my head where I was like, is that me?

No, is it my sister? Is it in the police? I was just like, am I just not in my body right now and that's actually me because that girl looked exactly like me. Do you talk to a finder now? I mean, it's yeah, but I don't you should look her up and I will look her up. Hey, if you were at this school on this date, where

at this? Oh, oh, so you don't think you could. No. Okay. Maybe maybe she's on that website Chris was talking about and maybe you still look the same. But I don't think I ever made eye contact with her. So I don't know if she knows I exist. But you definitely saw her. Oh, definitely saw her. Oh, I saw her. I saw me. Do you think right now she's like looking for podcasts on YouTube, and she's like,

I don't remember being on that. I don't remember being on that. What am I doing? I've been on so many of them too. I'm having to read this. What am I going to mind, this episode of Receive Podcast is also brought to you by Movement Watches.

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Join the movement. Thanks. Movement watches. Is it true that you shouldn't have a bath when it's stormy? I've often wondered about that. Like when I'm taking a shower in its stormy, like could lightning strike MV

conduct it through the water and then electrocute me in the storm? I heard a story about someone who was taking a shower during its stormy, like, could lightning strike and be conducted through the water and then electrocute me in the storm? I heard a story about someone who was taking a shower during a thunderstorm and then lightning hit somewhere on their house that was connected to the piping or something and they got electrocuted in their shower. The National Weather Service urges the public to avoid hopping in the shower during a lightning storm in the event that a bolt strikes one of your home's water pipes and electrifies your bathroom. Ta-da!

Where's the wool pipe? I don't know underground. Then they come up through your walls to deliver the water. How do lightning hit it through the wool? It hits if it like struck, because lightning, like if it hits drywall and come right through or through your window, through the glass?

Yeah. Lightning, man. Who knows? Lightning man. Look. I don't know. It could also hit like an exterior water spigot. I was still piped so with ground.

It just goes to the earth. That's why electrical wires go to them too. You never know. I mean, lightning strikes into the ground. I don't know. It does. It does. It does.

The water's going to be in that little droplets anyway. There's not going to be one long water stream. Yeah, but maybe it could also just be like, I don't know. It does. It does. The water's gonna be in the little droplets anyway. There's not gonna be like one long water stream. Yeah, but maybe it could also just be like, you know, like just kind of like this charge everywhere. This blows the wall out. Yeah, it gets a little crusty, you know.

I can see a bath being more dangerous because you're actually sat in water. Yeah, like doing dishes or something. But there's not water running, I guess if you're running the water at that moment in the bath. No, it's in like if it just came up the drain. But still, it's coming up pipes. Why not? Well, it has to come up the pipe if it's coming out of the tap anyway. Yeah, I'm saying like you were you said that it wouldn't do that.

But it's already full of water and not running. Yeah, but the bottom of the bath will be metal where the pipe is. I'm gonna. Is the bottom of the bath metal? The ring, right? But that's the pipe down. It's a PVC. Right, it's a PVC. I think they are, yeah. It's just like, yes, we're reading the yes. I don't trust you though, so.

Yeah, you have the metal ring on the inside, but then below that it's PVC. Yeah, so again, who knows? Maybe it's an old thing. Maybe. Like in old house. My old house had metal pipes. Yeah, so again, who knows? Maybe it's an old thing. Maybe. Like in old house. My old house had metal pipes. Yeah, same way. I mean, my old house had copper pipes on the inside and then the sewer line that ran

out was iron wrapped in concrete. Okay. Because apparently that's just how they did it back then. Old houses are fun. Old houses are not fun. Old houses are fun. Old houses are not fun. Old houses fucking suck. I had like aluminium wiring. I did too, it was awful, which is shit.

Yeah. No, yeah. I thought having an old house when I bought my old house, I thought having an old house and then like working on it and learning about houses would be fun. It was not. I think I'd rather do like a full tear down one day, like buy just a shit house, just go scratch.

Just do a house flip. Yeah. People do. I don't know. I don't think I'm the type of person to do that. I bought a fan the other day. It was gonna replace a fan. Like a ceiling fan?

Yeah, man. And then just, I got halfway through it and now I just have like nothing. Oh, because you gave up on installing it? Yeah. I mean, I'll go back to it, but for that day, I need... I feel like you need two people to install a fan. All right, maybe.

I tend to say, That's just heavy, dude. I like doing stuff myself, but I always hire someone if I might die, do it. I don't think I'm gonna die doing it. Like mowing the lawn. I have a room. Just don't know what I, I have a room.

I don't have anyone to put a lawn mower. I have a small room in my house I dedicated to VR. It's like, it's like really empty and I can go around and do whatever I want in VR there. But the ceiling was kind of low and it had a ceiling fan in there. So I thought, okay, I'm just gonna remove that ceiling fan. That way I don't actually hit it with my hand, you know, and when I'm not, when I can't see it.

So. So you're so tall. Yeah, I did a similar thing where I was like, oh, I can just, just have to unscrew it and undo a few wires, right? I was up like, it, like a couple of hours. Yeah. And I was like, oh, I can just just have to unscrew it and undo a few wires, right? I was up like a couple of hours trying to undo it. And I was like, how the fuck is this thing suspended? And I got to the point where I got so frustrated, I just got like my snips and I cut every wire.

There we go, problem solved. You know what I did? I was trying to, um, because I replaced it. I was trying to fix the fan first before I replaced it. And then at certain point I was like trying to fix it, ended up undoing it. And then it disconnected it, but if still a fan connected by wires. It was broken about it.

It wouldn't spin or it wouldn't light it. Oh, it wouldn't turn on. Even with fresh props. And then so then it's... Why don't you just get a new lamp? Well, because it's a fan. You know, it's like got lights on it. As long as it still operates like a fan though.

Yeah, but I don't know. Well, you know, I knew, if I had gone back in time maybe, but I've already done it, Mark. It's already no fan that enough. It felt, and I was like left holding it, but it's still connected by wire, but I couldn't put it back up because it was too heavy and I couldn't like get the wires to shove in it.

So I ended up just like slowly setting it down. It was dangling by wires for like a couple hours. I'm just connected. That's where I was. That's what I did well. And I just cut everything. Wow. Yeah. I would almost around with electrical shit. I built, I built like every piece of furniture in my apartment, but that's it. I've hung my own like curtain rods and everything like that. But to be clear, I set it up. So it's not dangerous. I know I know at least be clear, I set it up so it's not dangerous. I know at least what I'm doing. I trust you.

So it's not like I just cut it and then tied them all together and lift it up there. Yeah. But yeah, it was shitty. Fuck that shit dude. Yeah, I feel like anytime I do any home improvement stuff, it's always like, oh, it's gonna be so easy. And then like three hours later, I'm like,

why the fuck did I start doing that? That's what's great about living in a apartment is whenever you have any issue, whether it be technical or something's broken, they face it for you. And you don't have to pay anything. Yeah. I feel like I would want that just for toilets.

Do you have a lot of toilet problems? No, but you know how after a couple of years of use, the seat gets like, a little bit, it hasn't give side to side. Just get that little, on one of my balls. Can you just get those little sticky things? To like, the older ones,

I just don't wanna touch this. The nuts are probably loose. You just have to tighten it. I wanna touch it. I wanna touch the back of the gummy toy. Get a glove. Or just wash it and then touch it. Put some gloves on, wash it.

Put it in your dishwasher. No, seriously, it's just those two nuts on the back you just have to tighten those. That's it. I installed my bidet in my new apartment. Was there, like, how did you do for power for that? So luckily the place I'm in has a outlet like right next to the toilet.

Okay. Yeah, but in my, it was, yeah, because in my previous apartment the outlet was on the other side of the counter, where I guess you'd plug in hairdryers and things like that. So I had to get an extension cord and just run it along the floor and back up. Did not look pretty. So you just bought a seat that skirts, right?

I didn't buy it, it was a gift. Okay. But yeah, it squirts your butt. Do you use it all the time? Not all the time. So sometimes you're like, that was a messy one, I'm definitely gonna squirt. Yeah, yeah.

Or sometimes it just feels good because you could also make the water warmer too. And there's also like an air dryer. So you just like sit there and like just like. You're like that Gifu Velmo? Yeah, no, that's exactly what I look like. Huh. Have you never used one Gifu?

I used one in Japan. Well, if you want to come over, you can use my, but you can go and squirt your butthole. I look like. Huh. Have you never used one again? I used one in Japan. Well, if you want to come over here, you can use my, the day. You can go and squirt your butthole. Although, I don't know if that's like, because I've used it. No, that's fine.

It doesn't go in your butt, it just sprays water. What about the, okay, here's what I've always wondered about it. The water squirts up, hit your butthole, and then cleans it with a poop. Then that poop water falls back down onto the thing that's squirting water up. What do you think the squirting thing in the toilet is?

It's like underneath, it's gotta be underneath your butt to squirt up into it. No, it doesn't. Well, it comes out this way. So it's had a diagonal and it squirts your butt. Oh, like, oh, so it's like a diagonal? Yes, a diagonal. That's smart. And then, that's even a diagonal and it scorch your butt this way. Oh, so it's like a diagonal? Yes, a diagonal. That's smart.

And then, go down. But even still, Chris, yeah, even if it was right under your aim going straight up, the actual hole that's coming out is going to be so tiny that the chances of a speck of poo landing on that and getting stuck there ready to spray up again, it would never happen. Yeah, it could.

If it was in your brain. Here's the deal with it. If it was just mine, I was only using it, but if it's someone else's, and someone else's speck of poo could shot up my butt. That's gonna happen. You never know, though. You never know.

You never know. Yeah, and that's why I'm like, I'd love your life super happy. Honestly, you probably get the same amount of poo from other people in your butt just from using the toilet because of the fecal, eh. No, that's why you always flush it

before you go to sit down. You do that. If it's dirty, well, I get you flush the toilet if they're shit in it and you have to use it. Yeah, you flush it. So when you go to a public bathroom, let's say you're at the airport, Chris,

you gotta take a dump, you walk into the stall, before you sit down and take a poop, you flush it. So when you go to a public bathroom, let's say you're at the airport, Chris, you gotta take a dump, you walk into the stall, before you sit down and take a poop, you flush it. If there's anything in the toilet. Anything at all. If there's like toilet paper or something, it looks like someone's used it, then yeah, I'm gonna flush it. What if it's just,

what if it's perfectly clear water with one square toilet paper in it? I'm probably gonna flush it, because I would never flush that. Why would you? I would never flush it. What if someone, like, I don't know, what if there's something,

what if there's like a secret poo that's underneath it? I don't know. It's what's out here. You're just putting more stuff in it. That's just gonna go like it. But what if it like you, it poops in it, it splashes and I don't know. Does that happen like normally?

Like a splash? Yeah. I mean, it can happen. Does it? A poo splash. Does it splash on your balls or what? Does it splash on? I mean, it can happen. Does it? A poo splash? Does it splash on your balls or what does it splash on? I mean, anything. Who knows?

I don't have balls. I've legit asking. Well, no, you can get a splash. Go right back up to your cornhole. Yeah. It's happened. It's not a puzzle. No, I just want to always flush.

I just just flush water. Yeah. How many times do you flush on a typical poop? Usually just once. I usually do twice after I after I poop I flush it as a courtesy flush and then I wipe I'm gonna get yeah Because usually I'm in a situation where I don't want to like spend time with the shit stinking up the room, or anything like that.

That's an expert's problem. Also, like it helps like if you flush it first and then because like when you wipe it creates more stuff in the toilet, so it's like more likely to clog it if you do that. Okay. I got you. Man, I, yeah.

This is a very quiet conversation. How big do you think the poops are from that seven foot eight woman? I mean, we're vagina 16 and 18 inches. Who did that picture that you showed us? What oh, yeah, I forgot about that picture. People were mad at me for sending that picture. Oh, Of your shit of the shit. It wasn't on my shit. This shit that you saw. Who is mad? Some people in that broadcast slack channel. Oh, I guess like you put it it in a group Slack channel. Whoa. Well, these people expected it, but I guess there's people in that channel who aren't here.

We don't work on the podcast. Right. They shouldn't be in the channel. Right, I was like, oh, I didn't realize that there were other people who work here who need to keep tabs on that channel. Slack should have that like reveal feature when you can send something blood and then you... Oh, that's a good idea. Yeah.

Yeah. Everyone will like to click the thing. Yeah, so I feel like I warned everyone here before I sent it and then I sent it. Yeah, but not everyone. Oh, can you send it to me? You don't want. I want to see it at this point.

It's pretty, it's pretty bad. Man, I know why I talk about this so much, but I got my hair cut earlier today. And I feel like for the first time in a long time, they'd listen to me and didn't put shit in my hair. Did you go to a new place? No, same place. But normally I tell them, don't put anything in my hair.

And at the end, they're like, what's that? Oh, it's just some leave-in condition. You're like, the fuck did I just say? Well, they probably think you mean like gel. I see. Yeah. What can I say then to make it more clear? Like I say don't put anything in my hair.

Just say I don't want any products. No products. What's so ever in my hair? What's that different? That is trim your eyebrows this time. They did not. I'm very happy. Yeah.

Because product is just anything. Whereas when you say don't put any stuff in my hair, people think you mean like gel or hair spray or something to keep it a certain way. You should just say you're allergic to a lot of products, so don't put anything in your hair. Just say I'm a filthy fucking animal, don't wash my hair, don't put any product in my hair, just cut it, and let me get the fuck out of here. But the stuff in your head now?

Yeah, because I'm used to that, that they put a little bit of stuff to make it stay there. So because otherwise it gets like loose and gets in my face. You get a little puffed. Yeah, I don't mind, but I guess that, I guess that for the camera. It's kind of good. That's a good for the camera.

Yeah, I don't care. I'm fine with whatever. We had that, I felt kind of awkward the other day. We had that big company wide meeting. And like at the very start of the meeting, they showed that short that we made for like a sale for the Memorial Day sale. And it was weird.

Are you being a bad boy? Yeah, but it was weird that like I didn't know they were gonna show that I know it and like you and I just happen to be sitting next to each other Like what about the other then I hadn't I hadn't actually watched the final version until then and I was laughing out loud That stuff I was doing on the screen and I felt like the biggest asshole laughing at myself In my own performance. That's a good short. That's pretty good. Yeah.

Like if you're going to make like a commercial far-road store, that's the way to do it. Yeah. Just make it entertain. Wasn't there's another short, I think it's the dog's short where you were like a photographer and it was at that lighting joke of thought back to that. Yeah, well, that's good. That's good. I felt like there were some performance things that they cut out in

The this most recent one. Uh-huh. Like when I was a bad boy mopping up I kept like turning around and showed my ass to camera Yeah, that didn't make it into the Yeah, it was it wasn't in there who edits this We have a whole post yeah, it depends on who's available and who's on what projects I'm not really sure who edited that particular one I feel like that shoot went really fast. Yeah, well because we did two camera Mm-hmm, you know, so it's like when you do two camera where you know

Just going back and forth. Yeah, I didn't appreciate the fact that Blaine plays a cop every time we need a cop Yeah, so it's with him that mustache Yeah, it was it, it was good. Like I felt like in the past, you know, when we were down at 636, I used to always bitch robotics. And your time, we'd have to feel something like that. It'd be like two days of shooting,

but this one was, this one was really, really fast. Yeah. Well, it's, yeah, it's, it's also, it's easier whenever we're not doing everything. Yeah, you know, it's true. It's like, oh yeah, hold up. Let me set up the camera while I also act in it. Yeah, while we run lines at the same time

Well, it's like short since Congress that went pretty fast Were there? Well, yeah, like secret door was shot in like an afternoon went into the night That's my favorite is one shot like the whole time. Oh one straight shot Completion. Yeah, but we wouldn't lay it into that night. I remember I was getting so pissed off I just wanted to go home. Yeah. The speaking of getting pissed off and wanting to go home, that drunk RBB read that you guys did is going out soon. Yeah, they was, those cheese then Bernie's vlog.

I think it's, I think it's been decided that's coming out on June 12th. Oh, that's next Monday. That's, that's great. That we actually have two drunk things both coming out within like a week. Yeah, maybe we have a problem. Did you drink it? Did you come out? Yeah, today. I said, I'm watching. It just came out. like a week. Yeah, maybe we have a problem. Did you drunk it? Did you come out? Yeah, I said I'm watching.

It just came out like right before we started this, right? Yeah, it's so fucking funny. So tell what's the premise of it for people who don't know? Oh, it's an interview where one of us, like in this one, I interview my drunk self. Right. So it's me sober talking to drunk me and they're cut where it looks like we're having a conversation

I'm glad we finally did it because Bernie's been talking about Doing that for like three or four years. Yeah Yeah, a few others that happen that night. I think they're gonna get released. We feel three They're good. They're all good It's fine to see how like everyone's a different type of drunk Uh-huh like I feel like you're a very evil drunk. What? No, I'm a super nice drunk. Apparently you were like kicking computers over. I kicked one computer, all right. And I did it, like, was that important one?

No. I couldn't. I knew it was one of the animators' computers. I don't remember. No, it couldn't. But I was like saying, I didn't really friendly manner. Yeah. Like, you kicked it over in a friendly manner.

I didn't kick it over. I was like, I didn't really like it. I didn't really like it. I didn't really like it saying I didn't really friendly manner. Yeah, like I you took you kicked it over in a friendly manner I Didn't kick it over I kicked it. It was just like a foot pay was like a this I doubt it was that soft. I and I'm very I'm very huggy. I'm very friendly. I'm like a fun drunk I'm like not one of the people who like cries and fights, you know I mean, you all have seen me drunk. Right? You're pretty jolly.

Yeah, see? Yeah. Okay, I agree. You're looking to be for validation, yes. You're very jolly, you're very fun, Chris. What kind of one of mine? Yeah. That's kind of goofy. I think you're just like you, but like.

Silly or more. You said that was such a filth look. You're like, no, but like, like, like, my wish is because like, you already, Silly or more You said that was such a filth look you like No, but like like the way where it's just because like you already I Think you have a lot of meanness Stork inside you and I think like every now and then it comes out But I think when you're drunk like punching your phone like punching my phone or me or like you know calling me a client Like it's just more easily That much your grit Filt a full-zo. Yeah, like, it's just more easily. That much your grit.

Felt a full-zo. Yeah. I mean, it's not actual meanness though. Yeah, I know. I'm actually like, tripping you in the street and like throwing water on you and stuff. Shocking a drink in your face. Yeah, or punching me in the face like that one time.

Yeah, Barbara's filming me. I think I've punched your phone several times. Just, you didn't write before this podcast. Barbara's filming me. I think I've punched your phone several times. Just. You did it right before this podcast. Yeah, it was on the thing and I was trying to punch off. But it's only gonna land on carpet. But one time I punched it while you were filming me and I punched way too hard and I like following through.

Well, because I was- I punched your phone into you. I was filming you like this. Yeah, and I was just going like this. I was like, And then you went like this and it was like, end of my face and like hit my nose. I'm so sorry. Not pleasant. I was like, And then you went like this and it went like in my face. And like hit my nose.

I'm so sorry. Not pleasant. I felt bad about it. I feel like I don't see you drunk very often, Barb. I don't get drunk very often. Yeah, who's thinking about that? I was trying to think like, what is Barb like drunk? And I mean,

Maybe we'll find out one day. Maybe. Maybe I'll do this series at some point in my life. You're into yourself. Yeah, although I'd be scared because it's like, I don't get drunk very often, especially during like our shows. Like maybe during always open, I get a little tipsy,

but like, I don't know if I'd want to necessarily show that side of me on a production. But we'll see. Yeah, initially, they had asked me to do it. And initially I said yes. And then like when it came time to schedule it, I backed out. I was like, no, no. I'm still recovering from the cheese master.

I mean, yeah. The cheese master. Oh, man. I like to think of the cheese master as your alter ego. God. I love the cheese master. I was going to, I was like going to like go take a nap or something. And then cheese master came out. I'm like, watch this take a nap or something and then cheesemaster came out

I'm gonna watch this I'm not even till the cheesemaster My favorite part was watching that back is every time it cut to me and the people I was sitting with we would just be like Oh my god You should whip him out every five years. No, no god. No, that was it. I felt so bad for so long Well is it's back? So, you know? Was the day off to one of the West days of your life?

It was, it was bad. And it was bad because when I woke up, I didn't feel that bad. And, you know, burning, I came because my car was still here and I came, I took an Uber over here. I got my car, you know, and burning actually ran into me. We talked for a bit. And I took my car back and I was fine.

But then like, as the day wore on, I just felt worse and worse. So maybe you're still a little like drunk when you go? I don't think so. I felt fine. I felt like totally sober. But like, that's why I started throwing up in the afternoon. And then didn't finish until like 7pm that day. It was, it was real. For the kids. Yeah, absolutely.

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You could do it with a square space domain and you could manage all your customers Chris and connect with him via Facebook and Twitter. Every sock I wear. You could encourage them to send photos of themselves jacking off into your socks. So I just got. I'm gonna do Barbara's Christie Cunts.

I'm gonna do Barbara's crusty cunts. Tucked. I just got a message from Zach, the poster has sold out. Well, I guess if you didn't get it, come to our TX. I could get it there. Only if you're the first 100 people. Yeah, okay, very limited. So during your Adred, Chris looked at,

I looked up your text. Oh, you looked at it. You asked to see it. I know it's really bad. I was shit. It was really bad. That was a public restroom in Sydney. Let me recreate what just happened.

I've seen, while you were on doing your Adred. This is Chris. Oh. I've seen worse. I wasn't less than that. I've seen worse. I want less than that. I've seen worse. I went the best is before you tell your story. If you zoom in on that photo, it's cracked.

The seat is cracked right where all of that happened. Anyway, go ahead. I was at a bar and a bunch of friends out drinking and I go into this toilet and it's like It looks like it's just like someone vomited shit all over the toilet All over it's just like I'm like well I walk away from that and then we're drinking later and I'm talking to my My friend and he's like, man, I destroyed one. I was like, what? He's like, yeah, man, I was, because he was drunk.

He was like, the toilet seat was really gross and I just had to go. It was coming out. So I didn't want to wipe it off. So I just kind of like squatted and like, let it loose. It's like he like he like shotgun blasted. Oh my god. He didn't even sit on it He just like bent over and just Are you still friends with this guy? Yeah, I'll tell you who it is. I'm real whisper it And that guy's name is Marshall Rimmer Okay, I don't know what you didn made that up. It was not Marshall. Okay. I don't know what, you didn't have to whisper that.

I was knowing that it was the person that's except me and you. I don't know. Still, it was pretty bad. I felt like it was a wake-up call. When I was younger, when I first moved to Austin, I started going out to bars downtown. I came from a small town, so I didn't know what big city shits look like. Can I please, I know I can't, but can I please get the title of this podcast?

Oh my god. It was like I opening to see how people destroy bathrooms in downtown Austin. Like I remember like one of the worst like I hated any time I had to go to the bathroom at Emo's when they were down there like a Red River between six and seventh. It was like oh god. I really got a piss like even just pissing It was like oh no, okay. I'm gonna have to go do it like it was always it always stank so bad Everything was so filthy. Yeah other people's poo is awful You think that's you know the song you know with OPP yeah, you know me doing it sounds for other people's poo. Well, you think that's, you know, the song, you know, with OPP, yeah, you know me.

Do you think that it stands for other people's poo? I don't think so. It stands for. But there's someone, someone who's done the worst poo ever. Well, it looks like that story of that British airway flight that I had to turn around. Cause this poo was so smelly, right? Yeah, but I'm sure. Maybe that was the same guy.

I'm sure to them though. It's not as bad as other people's poo. I don't know. You know when yours is worse than normal, right? Like sometimes you're like, whoa, that was, that was rank. Yeah. Man, so is there anything?

God, we're like really, we're in the weeds here with this fucking toilet talk. Is there anything worse than a sparigus pee? But why? I don't think my pee is affected by a sparigus. Some people don't smell it. Okay, maybe I don't smell it, then. It's like, it's such a fucking foul smell.

And I feel like it happens so quickly after you get a sparigus. But I don't know how that happens that it goes to your body that quickly. What kind of is it like pungent? Like what kind of bad smell is it? We should do a test, like some sort of, God. I don't know.

Like a smell test. It's like a pungent sour smell. It's just gross. And it's so specific. Like I had a quiche recently, took a piss off because I was like, oh, I guess it was asparagus in it. Didn't notice, but you info's in the piss. I love those big farts, which are always really smelly.

I don't really get that. One time I went to, I was at day long meetings somewhere, and since the meetings were day long, a catered lunch was provided, but was provided, and one of the sides with a catered lunch was a sparragus. I was like, okay, fine, whatever, I'll eat this Asparagus. It's good. It was fine, ate all my food.

Then before we were going to start our afternoon meetings, I was like, all right, I should go take a piss because I don't want to have to get up and interrupt these meetings for this afternoon. So I walked into the men's room, opened the door, walked up to a urinal. The previous person had not flushed and it already reaked of Asparagus.

It was just filled with asparagus stench. I was like, this is fucking disgusting. So, okay, this is going to be a real dumb question. And I'm probably going to launch it for this. You have to flush a urinal? Yes. I don't flush myself. But I just assumed it was like an open drain that you just peed. Now, I know there's a, in the older style ones like this is a bit of water there and it's got like a handle like like a toilet. Okay, okay. Okay, I think I've seen that number and I think they do that so that like this if it was just an open hold and all the smell would come back up and there'd still be like the residue around the ring. Okay, yeah, that makes sense. Yes, so the water keeps all that smell away. I also want you guys to know every time I pee in

the shower, I think about you. Well, thanks. That's a weird name. Not me. I pee in the shower I think about you. Well, thanks. That's a weird thing to do. Not me and the shower? No, I don't. Well, now I'll start thinking about you. Do you squat? What does it just go down your legs? It just goes down.

Do you have to wash your legs extra careful after? No, because your pee doesn't stick to you. No, but there's an area under your legs where if you don't, so say I've done shower, gel. I always pee at the beginning of my shower. you. No, but there's an area under your legs where if you don't, so say I've like done shower, I always pee at the beginning of my shower. Why not just go to the bathroom before you go. Because I'm in the shower.

No, but you know you have to, so you were by the toilet. Yeah, you were like as close to the toilet as possible. You know what I'm even closer to the toilet being in a shower that's already going. No, no, no, no, no, no. Here's what my toilet smells like, right? It smells like the toilet.

Which... But my shower smells like shower gel and shampoo. Clean. And I don't want to smell like... I don't want the drains to have piss in it and eaking a pissy smell up. Do you know how much shit... What a shit there? Do you know how much shit gets washed off your body and how gross your deep down in your shower drain is?

I have a story. Before we get to Chris' story... Is it a person pooping in your shower drain is. I have a story. Before we get to Chris' story, is it a person pooping in the shower? Patrick is telling me that Asparagus has the same acid that's found in skunk spray. Oh, ew. So if they're to put it in your cream or reference. Also, if Patrick also mentions it's a good time

to let everyone know that Sally, LaPage is revisiting June 26th. So we can ask her Maybe some of these I want to know Sally LaPage pees in the shower ask Sally We brought you down here for a specific reason Discussion okay, what are you gonna say for yourself? It's not my story. I'm telling you're the one telling it So and it's someone that you all know. You got it whispered that a I maybe I will I tell us after yeah, yeah They this was in an early time in their life when they'd recently gone away from home had their own place or a college

apartment type thing and They had a girl like staying with them for the first time and they had to go to the bathroom, take a number two. While the girl was staying, it's like a one bedroom type thing and they went to the, they're like, oh, I'm gonna go take a shower and in the shower, you know, it's like, well, they're gonna take a dump while they're in the shower. For whatever reason, and I do not know why, This person decided it would be better. Optical time. To take the dump in the shower.

They, I don't know why. They took what? Like, wait, like not poop into the shower during, but poop and then like put it in the toilet or. They, they took a dump in the shower. Were they drunk? No, I don't think so. Took a dump in the shower. Where'd they drunk? No, I don't think so. Took a dump in the shower and then shoved it down the drain.

They decided rather than like transfer it to the toilet. I don't know. I think, what was this trying to achieve? I don't know. I think it's like avoiding the taking of the dump in the toilet, like having to sound. I don't know. This is not me.

To avoid hearing the plops. Plops, or maybe it's like, they thought it would be like, like a quicker experience or like less conspicuous if it was in the shower. So there have been times where I turned on the shower while I was pooping, so I wouldn't sound, wouldn't it be? So this is, and then they're shoving, they're trying to shove their I don't like this down the down the drain

But the hot shower is just like breaking it apart And they creating like a sauna It's this like shut like shit like shit storm. Wow. And then they had the scenario where it's like they can't get it all down the drain. So they're just like trying to clean it. And then finally they get it all down. But then the bathroom smells like a war zone. So then they can't leave the bathroom because they know it smells so bad.

And then so they had to wait in the bathroom for like an hour until the smell of the sky. See, I know someone, this is not nearly as gross, but it's still also gross. I know someone who had to take a shit when they were in the shower. So they poop have to take a bite. You'll have to take a bite. They open the shower curtain. They open the shower curtain, put it into the toilet. And flush it. And it could be the old handoff.

Yeah. The thing I said about that scenario. But that would have made more, at least that made more sense, than, yes. The thing about that scenario. But that would have made more sense than... Yes. The thing about that scenario though is that never in my life do I want to feel the weight of my own shit? Like... So you don't want, you don't want, would you want to know?

I never want to hold my own shit So years ago we talked about the idea behind shit stats. Would you ever be curious about that? Yeah Where it's like you have like a toilet seat that ways you before and ways you after so you know There has been stuff that's now. I think yeah now now it exists Yeah, I think about it all the time, but I would never want to feel it in my own Do you want to like yeah, it's two hands-on to literally this role? Yeah, I would never want to feel it in my own. Do you want to, like, yeah, it's two hands on, two visceral. Yeah. I don't want to feel like the warmth of it.

That's a lot of. What if it was cold? Then I'd probably have to go to the doctor, I think. Yeah, but what if you like cool off first? To like harden a little bit? No, it's still warm. No, it's still squishy than what? But it's just cool to the touch.

It's still warm, no, it's still squishy and wet, but it's just cool to the touch. There was a two day I fucked up on red a couple days ago, I don't know if you guys saw it. Where the guy said, he fucked up because he thought he was shitting blood, but he realized that he had just eaten a beet salad for the first time in his life. And he was just like dying everything red.

So he'd even gone to the doctor's schedule to colonoscopy. He was just like, really wrong with him. No, I'm not finding out there. Yeah, I don't understand. Like I've talked to people before who like they're sick or they're sitting with them and they say like, Oh, I don't want to go to the doctor. Like I don't want to know what's wrong with me or like,

I don't want to get you back in here. No, I totally get that. You do? I don't understand that in reality. People like anything is wrong with me. I go to the doctor because then if if it's something that's like seriously wrong it could be prevented

or it could be too late and you'd just spend more time knowing well that happened to Greg Miller like he was having like issues and like at one point he I don't know actually know the whole story but like passed out onto the doctor and I saw that his lymph nodes were really swollen turns out he had lymphoma. And he beat cancer, but if you don't catch that early on,

you're fucked. Definitely better to catch that earlier as opposed to later. Yeah, I get it. I feel like when I was younger, maybe I had that same attitude, but as I've gotten older, the second anything's wrong, it's not, I mean, it's more like, I don't want to be inconvenienced by this anymore. Sure.

Like, I want to go to the doctor, figure out what it is, and just be done with it. But it's also extra annoying here because it costs money. Not that much. It's good. We've health care. Health insurance. You still have to pay, shit, though. It's like usually, if you go get an inspection, it's like 25 bucks.

Go pay. It's not bad. If you have insurance, it's like 25 bucks. Go pay. It's not bad. If you have insurance, it's not that bad. I want to be good. I want to be good. Doctor for something and then she was like, your air is blocked. So let me clean it. And it cost me like $90 because she's like squirted water in my ear.

I was like, I find a note. I would have bloody done that myself. You remember when that happened to me? Remember that photo? Oh, God. I think that was also the bow tie podcast. That was what it was. Yeah. I almost threw God. I think that was also the bow tie podcast. That was worth it.

Yeah, I almost threw up. I did like a buff and I brought up liquid and it went down. They did the same thing where the doctor tried to put liquid in my ear and it wouldn't come out. Yeah, that happened to me too. I had to go to ENT for that. And I had to use like this special like microscope thing because I think it was so ludged into my ear too.

Do you have a, do you have a, I have a recurring dream where I get stuff in my year, and I'm just like pulling things out of my year. Never had that. I have to take full one out there. Yeah, for me. Do you hold it your wax? I don't think so.

I mean, I think it's just like a weird reoccurring dream where I'm like something is in my ear and I'm like pulling it. It's just like, do you get the satisfaction of it popping out there? Maybe, but it's like, never, it's always more gross than satisfying. I've never had that.

Yeah. But I feel like there are common recurring dreams and nightmares that people have. The ones that I hate are always like teeth things. I've never had a teeth dream. Really? I feel like every now and then I'll have a dream where I crack a tooth and then I spit out a little piece and then all my teeth start cracking

and then my mouth is just filled with teeth shards. Isn't there something like they, like someone did studies about dreams and how like, when you lose your teeth or there's something involving your teeth, it's like, it means you've been thinking about something in your life or like it relates to something. You feel like you've lost control.

You feel like you've lost control. I have that dream every night. No, I don't. Yeah, those are the worst to me. There's also like dreams about drowning or falling that also relate to other things in your life. Well, for me, so I have this thing where I have apnea. So when I'm asleep, a lot of times I stop breathing.

So the way that manifests itself is, I'll be dreaming, my dream will be going normal and then all of a sudden in my dream, I can't breathe. Just like in real life. And it's like I'm struggling and it's like a real thing where it's like you think it's real life and you dream, I can't breathe. Just like in real life. And it's like, I'm struggling and it's like, a real thing where it's like, you think it's real life and you just like, I can't breathe, I'm choking and there's nothing I can do about it.

And then I wake up and I realize I haven't taken a breath in a long time. I was like, I'll take a huge breath and that's fucking awful. I hate that. It's a really bad thing for our bodies to start doing. I'm not gonna breathe when you're sleeping. Why would we evolve to do that?

Well, I think it's a mistake. I don't think we're supposed to do that. Breathing is necessary for life, Chris. Do you guys still have your tonsils? No, mine got taken a long time ago. Yeah, mine. I got mine. Do you still have yours?

Okay. I have really big tonsils, and I talked about I'm always open the last week, but someone asked me, they're like, don't you have any trouble breathing? And it's about it I was up in the last week but someone asked me they're like, don't you have any trouble breathing? And it's like, I don't know if I do because I've always had my tonsils. Why don't you just get them out? See what it's like?

Cause it's, you don't have to. It's a big surgery. Yeah, it's a, like you have to go under and everything. It's intense. I got really big tonsils though. I got really big tonsils though. Do you think there's any tonsils fetishes? I'm a positive that you're...

Where someone's like, oh man, look at her tonsils. Those must be implants. Would you take a million dollars to eat Barbara's tonsils? A million dollars? Yeah. Would you be able to cook them? Put it in your face. Yeah, can I cook them?

No, you just need some salad dressing in. Yeah, I would tell a million dollars for eating her taunts. Yeah, you would do that. I'm not eating her. I guess it's kind of cannibalism. It is because we're one of human. But it's like eating a placenta. People eat those.

Yeah, but you make new ones every time you get a baby. Yeah. You know, you know. Which part of a human body would you eat for a million dollars? None. What about 10 million dollars? I mean, can I say like a little toe? I was just like nibble around the edge.

It's like a tiny, it's a little chicken wing. Yeah, it's like deep fried. It just tastes like a little- Some buffalo sauce on. Oh wait, wait. A little toil, I can just swallow it like a pill. Yeah, you could. Just maybe like-

But you can't swallow a pill. I had to, I had to start swallowing pills. Okay, I'm proud of you. Big step up. I would eat your tonsils, yes. Or your toe. Okay, so how much would you do that for? Like what?

Million is a shitload of money. You don't feel like 10 grand. Eat her tonsils? Yeah. And I don't know about that. 10,000? No. I would not.

I think you'd have to hit at least 100. What do I get out of this? Well, you no longer have big old, you can breathe better. Maybe take me out for a nice dinner. Sure. Yeah. Just don't order meat balls or any. For example, tonsils. What is a tonsil when it's out?

Is it like a bowl of flesh? I think it's just a, it's round, right? Yeah, I think so. Roundish. I don't know. Yeah. They look round in my throat. Yeah.

There was a, so you're talking to one of you, I think, was talking about like tons of fetishes or weird fetishes. I remember I read, I love really weird AMAs on Reddit. And one time there was this AMA from this, this woman who was a, she worked at a brothel in Australia and someone was asking her, like, what's the weirdest fetish you'd ever encountered? And she said that every now and then there was a guy who would show up and he never wanted to have sex. He wanted her to pretend she was a dentist who was examining the teeth on his feet.

And she was like, he didn't have teeth on his feet. He just wanted her to pretend like she was doing a dental exam on his teeth on his feet. But even the budget shit wouldn't make sense. You'd be like, say, ah. Right. So she was like, she would just like poke. She said, she would just poke at his foot and be like, oh, you haven't been brushing. Do you think she advanced it by buying like dental tools and like the little mirror?

I got some flaws. I'm sure. I think she said that she had to dress up like a nurse or something like in her sexy nurse outfit and do that. What's he like hard during this? She said that he she didn't elaborate on too much of that, but she said that he didn't masturbate or anything. He just laid there and let her examine his feet.

Do you think as like a call girl or a prostitute that you'd be more like, oh, I don't have to have sex with this person. I just have to clean their, or floss their feet. Fluffy. Or you know, like, is that like, like actually happy? Yeah, is that like a good client or is that one of those?

I'd rather just have sex with this person. I think it would be good because it would like change things up. Mixing, keep it interesting. You know, give your vaginal area for a little bit. Yeah. Get changed up. Make it keep it interesting. You know, give your vaginal area for a little bit. Yeah, get changed up. Cause it probably gets pretty monotonous, I assume.

Yeah. You have to be into everyone and like, yeah, it's all work. Yeah, I don't know. It's like on one hand, yeah, I can see that, right? Like it's like, oh, you're breaking the monotony. It's something different. On the other hand, you're like, man, I gotta entertain this guy for an hour. We're not gonna do the bank for a couple of minutes and be done

It's like we're gonna have to really spend all of this time in character doing this. I'll go this listarine You've got athletes in your mouth I think your tooth has a toe now. I Would totally watch the video. What someone was doing that. That would be a funny video to make. People are into a lot of weird shit, which is why I'm sure there's someone who's into tonsils.

There was that thing. I felt like I retweeted a few porn hub links recently, but one of them was talking about how searches for fidget spinners on porn hub are like astronomically high. Like everyone's so interested in fidget spinners, now people are looking for fidget spinner porn. So it was like when I read that, like the second I read it, I read it, like right when they released it,

I was like, I'm going to porn hub. I'm looking for fidget spinner right now. So what does that mean that fidget spinner porn, like are they inserting it? There was no fidget spinner porn when I looked. It was just like, it was like, the try not to come challenge. And it was just There was no fidget spinner porn when I looked. Okay. It was just like, it was like, the try not to come challenge. And it was just someone using a fidget spinner,

like nothing sexual about it, just like, the only thing, I tried to think about this when I saw that thing about porn hub. The only thing I could possibly think about that a fidget spinner could be useful and with porn is that if you like, had a woman had her legs open and used a fidget spinner to flick her clit, and it was just like, pfft woman had her legs open and use the fidget spinner to like flick her clit and it was just like,

pfft, against her clit, maybe. There is now fidget spinner porn and that is exactly what you were doing. Oh, is that what it's doing? Yeah, well I thought there's another thing you could do with it. Swipe right on Tinder. No, um, fidget spinner makes Don Willow horny.

I saw this video where someone put a fidget spinner and it was like a food Facebook video and they were making food and they put a fidget spinner in a food Facebook video and they're making food and they put a fidget spinner in a bowl and then squirted chocolate sauce on it and squirted it all over the place. Oh, interesting. And to make it a pretty chocolate spin, I don't know how you make plates. I hope you've watched it. You could do something, also squirt something on a fidget spinner and make it squirt everywhere

and make a mess. You could do that. Slumber. Exactly. Oh, you should totally on a fidget spinner and make it squirt everywhere and make a mess. Can you do that? Slumber. Yeah, exactly. Oh, you should totally do a fidget spinner. Yeah, I've had thousands of tweets, but I kind of don't wanna. Yeah.

I was driving down Lamar the other day and there was like a pop-up tent on the side of Lamar. You said fidget spinner is $5. It was like, how high the fuck? I don't dislike it or anything. He was like, how the fuck is it that popular? That there's like somebody went out, they got a tent, they printed a sign, and they got a bunch of inventory,

and they're on the side of the street. Like, they didn't have a shop. They set all of this stuff up for $5. How did they come back? Come back, what was their previous incarnation? Why, you know, it made it as toys, as they go in there, or they just like brand new toy. Mm-hmm.

I can't remember. But I mean, if fidget spin it isn't like a trademarked thing. It's just anyone can make them right. So I think so. I feel like nobody got super rich on fidget spinners, even though one person brought it. Like they didn't trademark it or they're patent it and it's not their thing.

Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. But I don't think I can't remember it being like a rehash or something different. Or like, yeah, when I was a kid, I used to play with my mom's salad spinner. Just to put shit in it. What is that?

That's like one of those things that it's like a, and you pull it and it. Yeah, mine was like a wine. It we wash like salad and you put it in the salad spinner and you spin it and it gets all the water off it. Yeah. It's like a streamer that spins. So you put your lettuce in there and since it spins all the water shoots off. I need water off your salad. So it's not wet when you try to make your salad. Yeah, so I would like the the the the winder was on the lid. So you put it on, wind it up and if you just pull the lid off it would be spinning

still. So I'd like throw Batman in there. I used to do that all the time. Oh, there you go. That's a modern day one. Well, that's like an electric one. Wow, I could have had so much fun with that as a kid. Wow. It's just wiping off the like, what is it?

It's just throwing it around the dry side. Yeah, so you're just like in that net and all the water ends up in the thing. You just see, I look all that water he got off. And that's some dry, some dry, I've never been like, I want you just see I like look at all that water got he got off and that's some dry some dry I never I've never been like I want my salad dryer. I'm never do you don't watch you watch all of us Guess I do I don't really eat a lot of lettuce. I don't think a lot So I'm telling you salad spinners are gonna be back in now. They'll take over the

Pigeon spinner and there's three salad spinners that are spinning as they're all spinning together They're all spinning and the things go love it. We're gonna get really dizzy in a couple of years. Yeah, well, it's fucking spinning All right, let's wrap this up So thanks everybody for watching We'll see you guys next week's if you're watching live right now on Monday stay tuned for cow chop TV Bye, Love you. Do you like apples? Describe the show to a newcomer and a more familiar way. Do you like apples? Alright, example.

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