Rooster Teeth Podcast - Rooster Teeth Podcast #117

Episode Date: June 8, 2011

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It's time to put your pedal to the metal. From the twisted minds behind Deadpool and Zombieland, an executive producers, Will Arnett and Anthony Mackie comes the new Peacock original series, Twisted Metal, a high-oxane action comedy based on the classic video game series. Anthony Mackie stars as John Doe, a motormouth outsider who must deliver a mysterious package across a post-apocalyptic wasteland. If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnett, and Thomas Hayden Church.

Twisted metal, streaming now, only on Peacock! You're listening to the audio-only portion of a drunk tank video podcast. To get the full experience and watch a video podcast, visit roosterteeth.com slash podcast. It's the motherfucking drunk tank. That was awesome. It's the motherfucking drunk tank. Apparently so. How you guys doing? Good. Good.

We recorded in this Monday morning, right before the, the, uh, of every E3 press conference and worldwide developer conference, so this will officially be the most outdated podcast ever recorded. Well, I just read some breaking news while before I walked in. Did you? Xbox.com leaked Halo 4 and Halo Combat Evolved the Anniversary Edition.

Really? Yeah. Interesting. Don't you love in the Microsoft keynote when they announced the Halo 4? That was great, right? That was unbelievable. We were really excited to announce Disneyland Experience.

Yeah, phenomenal. It's gonna be fun though. Yeah, I can't wait. I'm really looking forward to playing Halo Interversary. Let's let's run this joke into the ground. Yeah, I just I loved it. Like it's literally an hour before the press conference and their and Xbox.com is leaking shit.

Yeah, we should hold it together. We should have done it like we should then why we were doing that. We should watch it while we were do. We have a lot of stuff to do. We have a lot of stuff to do. We have a lot of stuff to do. We have a lot of stuff to do. We have a lot of stuff to do. We have a lot of stuff to do. We have a lot of stuff to do. We have a lot of stuff to do.

We have a lot of stuff to do. We have a lot of stuff to do. We have a lot of stuff to do. We have a lot of stuff to do. We have a lot of stuff to do. Yeah, I talked about them last part. Are you gonna make us eat those? I'm not gonna make you, but if you want to, they're available. They are cherries that have been soaked in moonshine. I think it's called Midnight Moon. How many you want?

A user from the website gave it to us at RTX. I think his name was Dan Jitsu. Do you trust him? Yeah, I've eaten a few already, so they're safe. It's not like Kloan. It's not like nail polish remover. go for it just fucking down it I mean is the secret just to like just to I'm shagberg it oh you're dead oh god you just swallowed it you're just swallowed it's like our wedding night

now you've passed we've passed out whatever we're not that cool um what do you think It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day.

It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. It's like a wedding day. We both passed out, whatever. We're not that cool. What do you think? Burning. Yeah, no, I heard this.

Burning. The birds. The birds. The birds. The birds. The birds. The birds. The birds. The birds. Where are you supposed to be there? God. You give me a cageel? It's not bad. I just had one. I did you. You have deadens all of your cells and your fix I think over years of drinking.

Yeah, for all of these. I'm preserved. I'm already mostly liquor anyway. At this point, I replace all the water in my body with alcohol. They say that taste buds and stuff get worn down over time. And it's sort of like that's how addictions like until like jalapenos start is because you're chasing that, you're chasing that buzz. You're chasing the fire.

You're more, you, that's right, you're chasing the fire and the more you wear your, your taste buds down. So you're saying jalapenos are like heroin in a way. And it's true. Chasing the green dress. It's true. Chasing the green dress. But you're like that.

When I met you, you like spicy food, but it wasn't like a priority to you. And now you have to have jalapenos and everything. You have to at least yeah, yeah, like you cut you douse everything with oh the hottest thing I can find I told Griffin this in last week's audio podcast But a wing place opened up near our house that sells ghost chili wings No, it's over the park center like behind freebirds. You know it's called it's called wings up There's a legal what are what was this like an illegal? illegal. I think when you're putting pepper spray on your wings, but I ordered like on the chart on the chart. Some of them right? I ordered some over the

weekend. Millions go though. And they weren't that bad. No? No. I'm sure it was highly diluted. It was yeah, it was hot, but it wasn't like painful to eat. Well, I got to try that. You should. I know you're not a big wing. I don't like wings at all, but I want to try it. What is it? Why don't you like wings? I did. You still big wing. I don't like wings at all, but I want to try it. Why don't you like wings? I did, you still taste good. I don't like the smell, like the worst smell and the aloe de aloe de aloe drafts. I don't like the smell.

If somebody orders buffalo wings, I just want to be pon-void. Like the man of like work you got to get for the return of meat that you get and like the messiness or whatever, I'm just not invested. I'm totally with you. I'm with you on ribs.

I don't like putting the work and the messiness in here, but I like it for wings. I'll do wings. I don't get it. I think the best is like turkey legs because it's like the best return ever You just like huge nevermind. Yeah, I'm gonna demonstrate Wedding night Joe We don't go to a lot of Renaissance fairs Gus and Joel and I so we may not have had Obviously the problem

So you're not in Vegas. Yeah, I would supposed to go to Vegas again and I looked like snow outside so Couldn't could make it again second trip in a row. I'm slowly are you just trying to fuck with Jack at this point? It's it's it is kind of fun It's like he hate you now. I mean, he literally he was so angry. I'm sure he was so angry It's like I'm not that much fun. I'm not that much fun. Yeah He should be happy that I'm not going. Yeah probably Jack is really fun to make mad too because he's got that I see Irish or something But he turns like bright red immediately. Yeah, like he's you can register how angry

I was just by looking at his face like it's just he's like a mood ring You know, we have this automatic gate now But the best thing to do before the automatic gate was when you got here in the morning, because Jack gets your late. Jack gets your late at the most other people. The best thing to do when you got here in the morning was to open it, drive your car through it,

then close it. So it was like, it was open, but it was just too narrow for him to fit through. And then to watch him come and then I have to get out of his car and on the gate. Yeah, you talk about it. Talk to you about him coming late. But I remember two, like several mornings

where you two were just sitting there in the front in the entryway, not working, waiting for Jack to get there. All morning, you talk about it. Talk to you about him coming late. But I remember two like several mornings you two were just sitting there in the front in the entryway Not working waiting for Jack to get there all morning. You're just so we were just waiting by the gate All morning. Let me clarify something here though. We were exporting He doesn't get out of his car before he drives in he drives in to the office and parks and then opens the gate It's not like he can't get in now. So sometimes you can you can set it up So you're just being courteous Brandon. No, I mean, her is he and he's like coughing and puffing the whole time like I don't know What it is I have no idea. It's just something about the gate It's just a mouth. It's awesome

And now he knows our secret Jack has a lot of what we call buttons I you know, I have that on video the grump. Yeah, I started recording. I wanted to record it like every day This is when I was like so angry at him and it was like my like Small way to like make myself feel better every morning. I love Jack the dead I have to because we work nine hours a day together But he's always described and he likes to describe himself as the most laid-back person ever I don't know where a gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that.

I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that.

I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that.

I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. I don't know where he gets that. flight was at 7.50 in the morning on Sunday and he woke up at 7 a.m. Yeah, and then you I guess he forgot his badge his iPhone charger like all of his belongings. He went to E3 and forgot his badge and Austin. Ouch. So if anybody's listening to this podcast and E3's not over yet, I would like to sell a badge on the cheap. You have to change your name to Jack Patillo. I heard a Nintendo got breached They had a pretty reached, but no customer data was lost so they say yeah, of course Sony said that too for about a month

Well, you know days they call the Sony breaches those are weekdays now Oh It's everyday. It's every day. I It's every day. It's every day. I think PSN finally came back up and I logged into it over the weekend and Was able I guess they're at their have like a welcome back program where you can get like two free games from a list and some other stuff All the games The ones I got wipe out HD and deposit your money here. You get infamous for free. Yeah, that's awesome Yeah, that's pretty cool. You get infamous for free? Yeah. That's awesome. Yeah. That's pretty cool.

You probably can too. You have to count that too. Yeah, I do. Wait, wait, you're on the Sony? Yeah. Are you? Yeah. My credit card on file at the time was expired.

Same here. That's wow. Yeah. I show you how often we use the piece. Yeah, I don't use it that often. But I had an expired credit card. That's pretty good attitude about this whole thing. Yeah.

That's how I was like, shouldn't you be concerned? you're like, no, it's great great got two free games I'd already like it was even with a bank. I don't even do business with anymore Fuck you bank of America speaking of infamous. I'm gonna do something I'm gonna enter the uncharted territory next week. Just one PlayStation game records after another with you Yeah, there you go. Not next week. I mean tomorrow, actually. I am gonna disconnect my Xbox tomorrow and plug into PS3 and play infamous too all week. It comes out, yeah. And there's got a lot of really good trophies.

And so I'm a little nervous. Nice. I don't know what to do. Play games. I'm gonna try it. Xbox and jealous. What's that? You're gonna throw a sheet over it,

so I can't see the same thing. Yeah, I don't want my Xbox to know. Just don't plug an ethernet cord in here. Yeah, I'm kidding I well, I think I have to do like the four hours of mandatory updates per game What's a new game you should start updating your system now though I have to play LNore DLC. There's plugging in a jack's computer. He's not here. There you go That's it all day. I'm kind of not a fan of like how now every time I plug in my phone or whatever it is

It's got an update. You know always an update.'s getting. I turned on the TV in my office this morning and there was an update for it. Oh really? I'm not. There's an update for my fucking TV. Yeah. Yeah I'm not a fan of that. There's too many updates.

My life has been asking me to update for like a long time. I haven't done it. Is that a problem? Do I have to do that eventually? You probably should. Your laptop's been asking me to have a talk with you about cleanliness. Oh god. Your laptop was like, could you tell her not to put any more epoxy or paint on me?

I'm actually really annoyed with myself. Yeah? Because epoxy you can't get off. Like paint is one thing. Yeah, it's one thing to put on a laptop. What are you using epoxy for? Why use epoxy? I don't know.

I make stuff with epoxy. Okay, fair enough. Anyway. It's not, her MacBook Air is less of a MacBook Air now and more like a catamory It's like a sticky mess that just collects fibers. It's a Do about two pounds heavier than it used to be. Oh, yeah, we got We're in that green pool the other day and it's like we couldn't find a bottle opener and We live had a bottle bottle opener attached to his shorts

Of course, that's like comes. Yeah, that's I had one of those when I was living in Puerto Rico. I had a bottle opener attached for my swim trunks genius Genius plus his sport like he plays his sport is Ultimate he plays for his B. We can't call it that you got to call it for all but I mean it's an illegitimate It's supposedly legitimate sport big sure a lot of running a lot of running a lot of running a lot of running many place for Izby, you can't call it that. You gotta call it Frolf. But I mean, it's an illegitimate sport. It's big, sure. A lot of running, a lot of running. A lot of running, a lot of thrott. So how does that tie into the bottle opener?

Why don't you just have that mean, you know, that age where you consider Frizby a sport and you have a bottle opener in your shorts that you bring with you everywhere. I don't know. That makes sense. It's a good age. That all ties together.

That is a good age. Probably have Dave Matthews Bayon number. I don't think he even knows who that is. Is that all around? I don't know. Do they still make music? So is the Apple Developers Conference? It's also today. I mean, you really timed it poorly. Yeah, it's all. It wasn't me. It was them who timed it poorly.

It's them. It's by the way. This is now the number two Gaming podcast really one. We passed we passed car talk for the first time ever car talk Well, that's the pulling of the government funding. Thank you GOP for yeah, yeah, you are funding car talks going down Yeah, I think number one is wait wait don't tell me which is another NPR podcast It's one thing to be behind car talk because car talk is a good show, but wait wait don't tell me which is another NPR podcast. It's one thing to be behind Kartalk because Kartalk's a good show, but wait, wait, don't tell me. Terrible. I'm not behind Prairie Home Companion.

Yeah, that's true. I've listened to Kartalk. We're not behind it. Crazy, but I don't even know what to say. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait on it, like we talked about this once before, like Paula Poundstone is on it. It's like the current event and news trivia.

Like if you've been a game show format. If you ever watch one of those like, you know, we're gonna have comedy specials from the early 80s. Uh-huh. Those, it's like Louis Anderson and like Elaine Boosler. Yeah, I have Paula Poundstone. Paula Poundstone. This is like a replacement for Hollywood squares. Uh, yeah, but like a, uh,

I had a snooty nerdy, Hollywood squares. Yeah. I had a snooty. Yeah, but like a I had a snooty nerdy. It's all of the squares. Yeah, a heavy snooty. Yeah, you know, socially conscious Hollywood. If we weren't on the podcast, I would take this conversation a whole different direction, but I'm not going to because we're on the podcast. I'll do it. Now I'm not going to do it. You brought it up.

No, you're the king of bringing stuff up. You don't want to talk about. If you don't say what it is, it's going to be boring. It's true. I'm the intro. There you go. And and okay, trouble with who? Certainly not your girlfriend that If you don't say what it is, it's gonna be boring. It's true. I'm the introble. There you go. And? Okay. Trouble with who?

Certainly not your girlfriend that Bernie ran off. That's a whole plethora of, that's a whole plethora of. No, see, no, you stop me. I'm going to be a real girl. I was going to be a real girl. I was going to be a real girl. I was going to be a real girl. It's been a real girl.

It's been a real girl. It's been a real girl. It's been a real girl. It's been a real girl. It's been a real girl. It's been a. I'm very excited to see Steve Apple. Steve Jobs Apple is live. See, this is that beer thing. You know, you just said the word plethora, which reminded me of this dude I knew in the army in Germany who was friends with my friend at the time, who said Belethora, and no amount of convincing

could convince him that it's plethora. And we didn't have easy internet, so you couldn't look it up. Back in the show, who's on the prediction. You don't have a dictionary. So no matter how many conversations. Back in the show, there's some kind of addiction. You don't have a dictionary. So no, no, no, no. How many conversations were like, I swear to Christ it's plethora.

He would be like, nope, blethera. You think you're still saying it to this day? I think he's alive, you probably. If there is no, if you, none of you have a dictionary with you or anything that could be used as a dictionary, then it's not wrong. Oh, really? Right.

Is that how you live? Like, all of the people in the army had no dictionary. I'm just, everyone you knew, all of the people in the army had no dictionary all I'm just everyone You knew all of the people You make a phone of soldiers I'm not you and your friends if a tree falls in the forest and says a word wrong Hear it then Is it wrong? It's the correct definition. I follow you Turned it into the tree. You got Joel on your side

Your story what were you gonna say? Developers conference I cloud I cloud Why are you all looking at me? Do you think that like Joel has some sort of personal title lane boosler? Is that what it was? I really want to know where he was going with that. Yeah, wait a minute. I'm sorry ruined I cloud Are you excited about i that. Yeah, wait a minute. I'm sorry. Ruin. I cloud. Are you excited about iCloud?

Yeah. What is iCloud? It's like, yeah. Right now, tell me, tell me. I don't know. The conference hasn't come out yet. What is going to be, what did you guys call it? This is like where you stream music, right?

And you can stream it to any one of your Apple devices, apparently. I'm not sure. Beyond that. I don't know. I'm going to be at a dictionary. We can look it up. If we had a dictionary, we could look it up. I'm getting my breaking news from you. I have no idea. Really? Yeah. Yeah, you do. What was it? How much do they pay for? They borrow. It was about like four million dollars, which makes you want to just grab a dictionary and then register every I blank. Yeah, yeah. It was like the worst kept secret. I I'm gonna buy I blank word dot com

That's what you're gonna buy cloud is supposed to replace the what's considered the failure of mobile me And it's gonna be like cloud saving and yeah cloud St. I don't know what would be bad about it. I know it was griffin use the shit at I drive Right, it's a look at her. You just fucking insulted a You use mobile me. I know I know that we set it up after my phone is stolen. Yeah That's what you when you see you use mobile me Yeah, in that sense. I haven't had anything stolen since but if it happens I mean you use mobile me use mobile. Oh, yeah, religiously. What do you use it for? I use it to connect back to my computer for screen sharing. I use it to save stuff.

Can you use it for? Can you use it for? What? Can you use it for? No. I'm just sharing. I'm just sharing. Sorry.

Oh, no, yeah, you can, but this is built in. So you don't have to have iChat running. And if iChat crashes, it still works. Plus, also, you can connect like the saved directories remotely. I have used it like on projects where I've been worried about losing stuff. All I know is that I ate a fucking cherry or the fuck that was and that's the last thing I remember. Have another one. No I'm not gonna have that one.

There's one for each of us. Just gone. Cherry, I already have mine. I did too. We have to go to work. This is my second. You are working. What do you think this is? You're at work. You'll be fired if you don't eat this cherry. No, we'll get we have more for him later

Just take your cherry. Joel eat your cherry You know I can get this right if you need your cherry. You know you said that Jack is able to peer-pressure you But you were just easily peer-pressured. No, but he's he's very like He's a side stuff. I don't know where he's a capricorn. Does that mean something? Yeah, well, they're very what what's the capricorn sign? Is that the goat? Yes, so that's why you're like head butts you if you don't listen to him That's the reason officially the real way we're told the story on the podcast But one time when I was a little kid I must have been like I want to say eight

I went to the San Antonio Zoo and in the zoo they had like a little petting zoo and it was just like sheep and goats and like farm animals essentially and you could go up to like a little vending machine You put a quarter in you get like a little handful of pellets and you go walk around like feeding the animals But there was one goat who was angry at the world and if you walked up to him with your hand like this with pellets He would like kick with his little front leg and you just like Throw pellets everywhere and if you saw anyone bending over it was just like a cartoon. He would charge at them and hit them in the ass. So I tried to I spent all day there watching

him butt people in the ass and then kicking like doing a little goat kick, knocking food out everywhere. Where was it? You just said San Antonio's. Oh, that is like a high school thing. This is why you don't want to go back to San Antonio. No, I do not want to go to San Antonio. So what did you did you watch it happen? Did you? Well, I experienced it. Oh, you watched it happen and then you went and did it again. No, I experienced it first and then I watched it happen. Oh, I see. It's like something out of it. Yeah. Okay, I see. By the way, why do they only have farm animals at pettings?

Yeah, that's just something like cheap, right? It should have something more interesting. That was Bernie Collins because he knew I would be the one person in the podcast to forget to turn my phone off, to ask if he wanted us, if he, we wanted him to call us more, because he's at the Microsoft keynote, and he can call in updates if we want them. Oh, that'd be, oh he should, yeah. Interesting, we'll see. Well, we have to take a break first. So let's figure that out, and watch us from thick animated adventure, Griffin's drunk, and we'll do it back. Jesus, guys, you'd drink all.

But think about it, and I'll go back. Jesus, guys, it's tranquil. Think about it. I was like third grade. His mom's friend came to pick him up, teacher says, OK, Jeff, you know her, right? And Jeff goes, I've never seen her before in my life. This lady's trying to kidnap me. And the friend is like, OK, ha ha, Jeff, come on. Really, tell her who I am that you know me.

And Jeff says, I really don't know. I'm kind of scared by everything that's happening right now. It got worse because eventually they got me to agree that I knew her, but then I said that the reason I had lied was because she touched me. What's wrong with you? Hello ladies and gentlemen, we're coming to you today from the Zeppelin Races. There's this barbecue place in Kirkland called Dixie's Barbecue, and they have a special hot sauce that they call the man.

And the owner will walk around with a little saucepan filled with the man and he'll ask all the patrons, you know, I meet the man. If you haven't met the man he'll get a toothpick and dip like a tiny little tenth of a drop on the tip of the toothpick and say, here try it and it's the hottest thing you've ever eaten in your life. It's no joke that toothpick can ruin your entire day and then there's all these newspaper articles on the wall and some of these articles look like they're from 1965 because they're so old but the dude and the pan are in the photos and they look exactly the same Date line Mount Fuji. I'm gonna say some of my brother did me those tortures. I'm in the driveway of our house

I gotta look look how close my finger is to my thumb, but they're not touching and he goes And I said, what? He goes, that's the closest anyone's ever gotten, ever. I'm gonna go in the house, I'm gonna cook in his book, or I'll wreck it, so don't move. I'm gonna stop fucking set in that tri-place for an hour. And finally, I could own my arm. But anymore, I'm crying, I go in the house, and he's watching Honky TV. I go, where house and he's watching

Okay, so speaking of rape LA noir is a great I finally beat it this week. I didn't even have the slate down Yeah, it's really good. Yeah, it's really, really really good. You really have to get that off your chest. I did. I love that game. Is it replay? Playability in that? Like, do you think you could go through the game again and get a different experience? Well, you could certainly get a different experience because the game reacts differently to how well you play it. Uh-huh. But so I guess like you you suck the first time and then you play it again a second time to get The good experience the good cutscenes and stuff, but I don't see much replay in it There's no multiplayer and the free roam isn't the same as grand deffato like you know just drive around and kill people

It doesn't it's not not that that's fun not as satisfying. Yeah. Well, and it's just the game isn't yeah I tried to do that like I I've been playing it pretty much. It came out and I finished all the street crime yesterday And I got you know, I was like well, there's nothing else to do. Let me run around and shoot civilians But you can't you can't shoot civilians and they are spry like you can try all day long to run them over with a car But those fuckers can jump or I can do it. I'm so the game That was for like allow you to play out a character Kind of won't allow you to play the character is that like just I mean back then there weren't like a lot of excessive traffic laws like pedestrians weren't necessarily

They didn't always have the right way back in the difference don't have they're always have the right way now I true it's a misconception. It is no when you wouldn't when they have to be in crosswalks It has to be like a designated time to watch Yeah, but if somebody walks out into the street and you hit them with your car. They are at fault They're at fault. I they'll get a ticket for it. I read somewhere. Well, so I mean, if you kill them, that's not the answer. No, they will get a ticket posthumously.

Well, they just jump into the road. What about the person driving the car? I mean, if it's their fault, then does a person in the car mean the truck? There will probably be, you have two people on investigation, but if they were totally at fault,, you there nothing will happen to you Maya There's not to bring up bad this seems like bad memories, but my ex-wife used to work for a DPS and her job was to code Traffic incidents and so she would take these like these handwritten traffic incidents

She'd have to digitize them and put them in the computer and she said that like 90% of all incidents where a pedestrian is hit by a car were the fault solely of the pedestrian and that the pedestrian gets the ticket and the broken legs. That's not funny but. Weird. You know what I mean weird about the rules. Follow the rules. Follow the rules. Follow the rules.

Cross the crosswalk. Wait for a green light. Yeah. I'm thinking no, no, this would apply to me because I'm never going to. Imagine. If you're driving down Riverside and there's like those a million people crossing illegally hit them I'm never going to speed limit if you're if you're drunk while you hit them is it like split then Yeah, that's a difference you're still drunk. You're still driving while intoxicated. They still right out in the middle of the street It feels like it looks like what do you don't drive drunk?

I'm not saying I'm driving drunk. I'm just saying like I mean the body with your eyes closed I mean what if the pedestrian was also drunk Oh It was drunk complicated They just compare like blood point whatever is drunker gets the ticket Um She was making great video game so Fred started dating right and she looked me up. Yeah, she did she investigated

She said that I was trying to steal her identity Hmm, how did that go? Did you do it? That I was trying to because she said I applied for a job there and I never did No, well unless unless she was lying to this date about it No, are you? Um, no, I just think it's funny and scary But it wouldn't be that hard for anyone really to any ex-girlfriend, ex-wife, to look up anything about a person now. Anyway. No, it's not hard at all. Like, you recently took, whenever I'm not gonna talk about that, nevermind.

Alright. There you go. No, you should talk about this. I'm not going to joke about this. Totally talking about this. No, I'm going to be going to joke about this. So, he's talking about this. There's more DLC than I've really known as soon, right?

Like, there's two out already. I'll talk about it really soon. Is there? Yeah, there's one coming out in June, and then one in July. The drunk pack, where all the pedestrian is drunk. I don't know what the one in June is called It's like the best bike exclusive. It's like walk around the map dark up walking front of cars There's two it's reefer madness and I figured the other one is reefer madness is July and then the dark We here to the same place 1947 47. Okay, so it stays in the 40s the whole time. It doesn't progress 47

40s the whole time it doesn't progress 47 States in 1946 we can you don't want us to answer these questions because you want to play the game right fucking ruin the game for you I'm just trying to be interested. Yeah, oh, yeah, oh, you're gonna play the game Yeah, I want to because it looks awesome. I'll play again. It's good. Yeah, it looks awesome I had to actually half the weekend Jeff was playing it So I had to spend most of the weekend in the bedroom because if I came out I would there'd be spoilers So Jeff I maybe maybe did this on purpose. I don't know. You're like, oh, wait, spoiler spoiler. And you kept me locked up in the back. So you keep your wife in the bed

or my friend video games all week. I repunzel there. Yeah. Yeah, no, no, no, no. It was the like, I'll just say like the last mission. Takes a long time. It's a long mission. And she would keep coming out and then be like,

oh, what's going on there? And I'm like, don't do it. But no, you don't want to. That's not where you want to walk in, especially if you want to play the game. It's a real whole game for it. Yeah, all of Sunday, I was like in one room, not allowed to come out.

So would she get the ticket or would you? It was for your own protection, sweetie. I don't want to spoil the game. I gotta get a room for that one. How many hours of the game? Like, 25? I think I played for 21, and in 21, I finished the campaign and all the street crime

Yeah, I almost bought around Friday and was gonna play for this weekend, but I didn't just good The most annoying thing about that game and I don't think there's a problem on the PC It's a problem only on the Xbox version is when you go back like after you finish the game You can go back and play case like that's how I did the street crime I finished the campaign then I went back to all the street crime and like little stuff I missed side quests. Yes, I quest essentially you have to, the game takes place over three discs. So when you want to do different cases, you have to swap out between the three discs. That's annoying. But you were saying that it was done as smoothly as it could be done, right?

It's smooth throughout the campaign. Yeah, but when you go back and you want to like, oh, I want to do that desk. No, I want to do this one. You could, and to be fair to the game, you could do all this side quests and stuff while you're on that case. But if you're like us and I just want to get through the story, it's at least possible. And then I think I did one street crime, the entire two. Yeah, how many things before we,

that that's never gonna be a problem again. Like they'll never be like discswaping. It's not a problem of the PS3. Well, once things move to a undemand, and you can buy digital, and it's just on your hard drive, it'll be fine. I thought that like watching I think the cloud at least at least from all the games that I've watched being played. I haven't played like a million games or anything. I thought that the transition between cutscene and gameplay was really smooth.

Like compared to the same models and stuff right. Yeah, but it's even then it's really done really well. Like Griffin would be watching me play and she'd be like, wait, I don't, are you playing right now or is this a cutscene? And I'd be like, well, I'm playing right now. Which is like, but I thought that I think you're playing a second ago. I'm like, nope, that was a cutscene. It's like, it's really, really I'm so sorry. Yeah, and you were saying the millionaires watching me too, where like you didn't even realize that you have been stepped down to a couple of characters and you were a different character. Yeah, she was like, daddy, are you that guy now? And I was like, no, sweetie, I'm still, yes, yes, I am that guy. What did that happen? Yeah, the facial

animations are crazy in that game. Did you have any trouble reading the real estate guy like the gruff old man? Yeah, like the squinty eyes the John Noble character. Yeah, yeah, the guy was He's tough. He's tough. He's really tough. There are a couple there was one case you told me I was gonna fuck up and then sure enough I did the golden butterfly. Yeah, I don't know anyone who's completed that successfully on their first try. Yeah, it was terrible Yeah, I don't know anyone who's completed that successfully on their first try. Yeah, it was terrible Fairly difficult carry shaking his head. Are you worried about spoilers? Terrible like not good just like terribly hard. It's hard I think that's actually really cool component of the game just watching you like that's what I'm most excited about Just reading people's faces and like I don't know has I been done in a video game before?

Not like that. I think it's probably has the most advanced It also has the animation I've seen. It also doesn't get boring. I thought it would get repetitive after a while But it never got boring. What's different characters? Different motives. I mean, what do you think? What do you think so far? We've had a lot of games come out already here. You got any what do you what do you look them for a game with here? Portal 2 so far. Really? I still I still think I like portal 2 more than early nor I think I'd pick LN more Portal 2 was so fun between the single player component and then the the co-op as well I liked the ability to play with someone else and try to figure out the puzzle yeah for sure but like I look at portal to and like co-op and single player together is probably half the time I put into Elinor time length of a game should not fact I agree but like it's

it's everything I'm not a time everything should or time length of a game should not factor I agree but like it's everything I'm not a time everything should yeah, but length of a game you don't penalize a game for being I don't want to I don't want to if it's 10 or 15 quality hours, but if you can get 25 quality hours that are just as fun in I don't know I like the story in LA No, I'm better with seven hours at some point there. At some point, there's got to be a line, right? No, you said you did this not, like you would, if we see a lot of replay value in it, but what about you for Portal 2?

For me, no, but for some people, I'm sure for achievements. OK, all right, because you don't care about it. I would say same level of replay between those two games. OK. So I think it's mainly a style thing, because Illinois is definitely more of a your style. It's true.

It's true. And Portal 2 is more of a your style. That, well, no, because I read a lot of like dash ham that he's into that sort of theme. And honestly, like, you're not really when it comes to the games you like, I mean, is that really your style of game? No, normally I hate those kinds of games. Okay. But I like to learn more. I thought it was done really well. It addressed all the problems I had with those open world games. Well, it does seem to have like I kind of guides you, right? Like you you seem to be pretty, from what I've seen, like, what I've allowed to see.

It's just greenly linear. Yeah. I like that. It's a good idea. I like being told what to do. I don't want to be left in my own device. It's a draw sure. Yeah, that doesn't look to be overwhelmed with choices.

Yeah, that's what I hated about Grand Theft Auto 4. It was a great game, but it was just too much to do. I couldn't handle it. I didn't know what to do. Yeah, I just don't really like playing. Feel totally the opposite. Same here. I like. You like being able to play? Yeah, I want to do. I couldn't handle it. I didn't know what to do. So I feel totally the opposite. Same here. I like open.

Yeah, I want to do my thing. In the thing. Do you do a Joel Haven thing? What is your favorite game of all time Joel? You may have already been asked this on the drink tank. Shit, I don't know. That's a good question. Favorite game of all time.

Speaking of old game, I'm going to help Joel out here a little bit. We talked about descent in the last podcast. You remember what we were talking about. But then after the podcast, I sent you that video of descent gameplay footage. It's so weird. It's just like when you see footage, it's like, oh, I think I remember that game and you see it. It's like smelling fresh, fresh, fresh, grass-mon spring. You know, it's just like it brings back the memories of everything.

You realize you played that game extensively? Yeah, yeah. And I totally forgot about it. It was like a wonder-years moment with that. It was a totally a wonder years moment. Like my log came out and I heard nearer ate her. Yeah, that was crazy. It was a good day.

It was awesome. So you don't know what your fear of game all time is? I got that. What have you played the most in the last five years? What have I played the most? I'm going to go with Halo, right? Pong, you played the most Pong with that spot. I think you're drunk. Yeah, maybe no, I don't know I really do like the Grand Theft Auto series. I'd halos certainly got to be in there. I just

Started playing Halo. No one told me about forage. No one told me about it Really, we didn't get the office memo about Halo is awesome. You haven't seen Griffall, anything else? You haven't seen like horse or anything else made in horse? No, it's a total surprise. Anyway, apparently Halo is great. No, I'm really invested now. I'm going to get good at it. The best thing in the world, by the way, is watching a drunk Griffin spend 30 minutes trying to line up two blocks together. It's fucking shitty. Okay, I think that and maybe you can do this

But you didn't seem to know can you adjust your controller to have different sensitivity? So if you your block doesn't go either sink into the ground or go like five feet above an object Yeah, you'd be sober No, it wasn't that it's acceleration. I tried it in various states and I have the same issue You know, it was a lot worse in the previous version of Halo, where they didn't phase into one another, where they were just paying into each other. That was like, yeah, that's not true. I thought that would have been more to report to each other.

I thought that would have been more to report to each other. It would like, rest on top of it, but then I couldn't get it as like completely clapped. Yeah, you can, if you're like, if you're super like a perfectionist, and you want everything to fit perfectly, that can drive you insane. Yeah.

Because it's like, no, it's not quite perfectly there. That you'll spend forever. When it's like, no, it's not quite perfectly there. You'll spend forever. When it was, I'm jumping into Forge. So if anyone wants to play with me, no. You're going to help. I'll, I'll, I'll, yeah. Yeah, although I don't know the, what are you doing in Forge? Where are you doing?

I'm just making stuff like I really, I was, like what? Originally I was, I was going to do it because I really wanted to make it. This was a good tool for you. I really wanted to make a horse map, but I think I'm a long way away from them. Like, I'm in like, Forge 101 right now. Like I'm just trying to map, but I think I'm a long way away from that. I'm like I'm in like

4201 right now like I'm just trying to get fucking blocks. You should make a horse map that can't actually be solved No part of the stipulation is you they have to submit a video of me doing it. Yeah, like you have to be able to use it You're on the inside. No, you're not those rules that apply out every rule You're on the rules apply to me. You're on the inside. You got extra rules Like you have to stay in the bedroom It'll be it you can't watch it It'll be a while before I'm ready, but I do like I'm I want to play it So anyway, yeah, so I if none of you know halos seems is pretty cool

I heard a few good things about that game What about you? What's your favorite game in the past five years favorite game the past five years? I'm gonna go with fabled to The Viva Pignata or Halo Reach. Probably Halo Reach because there's more replayability than the other two. Rich's fantastic. Viva Pignata. Viva Pignata Trouble and Paradise was fantastic.

Just fantastic. Probably 40 hours. I tried to play it. I remember when you were going through... It's stressful. Hit a... You like spreadsheets. Yeah. I couldn't handle. I mean the little cute animals and it was just I couldn't. Professor Pester. The second pest of the worst, right? I just I couldn't I didn't get that far. I just

the hardest part of the game is fertilizing a tree before it runs out of water. It's a bitch. It's a bitch. Getting the three fertilizers in. Yeah. I have no idea. You haven't played it? All right. I like Joel. I tried, but I just couldn't get into it.

How about you, Gus? Favorite game? Last five years. I would have to say either reach Mass Effect 2 or Fallout 3. No. And I know Fallout 3 is a contradiction based on my a hate-open world games But there's something about that game that was fun. Yeah, are you not including wow in this? I was thinking Xbox on that that we're talking Xbox

I said game, but if you want to make it Xbox then we can make it Well, well, well, I was able to play more wild than anything else. I'd probably think so more wild than anything else. I'd easily. I would think so. Okay, I'm probably still playing. Right now, no, I'm not playing well. I'm off again. I'll be back on soon, I'm sure. Like they unveiled new dungeons in the 4.1 patch. I still haven't gotten around to and actually I'm a little put off by that. Like I feel like now, like I wasn't playing at that time so I was busy. And now it's been so long long I don't want to be like the new person who doesn't know what's going on playing those So now I'm staying away because like as time goes on I'm more and more behind So you get do you get nervous then?

Yeah, I'm so excited. Yeah, cuz you were saying you you logged out once cuz you embarrassed Like I forget the exact circumstances, but I think we were in the middle of a boss fight and I moved and pulled trash into the boss fight and And caused the party a wipe. Yeah, I was already killing it. You see like I didn't want to see the chat windows like I moved the windows I couldn't see it in quick. I don't know what you just said. I Don't know the trash wipe. I'm not sure what the trash wife. Oh, it was so embarrassing I pulled extra enemies into a fight. Oh, so that we all got killed. Yeah, and then there was some added in the hitest chat window. I didn't want to see what they were saying because I was so embarrassed. I didn't want people to know who it was.

That's like the kind of thing. I feel like luckily that was like an inner server dungeon finder party. If that had been on my server, I probably would have had to transfer and change my name. So I've been fine. I wouldn't have been as protection service. I was like never be able to show my face in there. I've been waiting games before because it was like, never be with someone for the first time there. I've been waiting for the game before because it's been like, oh, I'm not as sharp as I'm going to be and then I just don't play and get worse and worse and worse.

It's like, well, I can never pick this up again. Yeah. Yeah. More skills have degraded. Yeah, it's supposed to be fun, right? And when you get to the point where you start to get, like, graded almost and like, how good you are, it's stressful. Yeah.

You know, it's easy to be a game at the moment. Yeah. It's, everything is accountability. This point, it's stressful. You know, it's easy to be a game at the end. Yeah, everything is accountability. This point, everything's traced. You know, everything. And how many shots you fired, they know how many hit, and they just play. It was worth World of Warcraft once you play, and you're playing like end game stuff.

It's like, oh, they're looking at your damage per second, and your spell rotation. It's like, oh, you should be doing this xyz rotation instead for an extra 1,000 DP. Do people come up and give you an ask for advice? Oh, all the time. The best is when like you know I play a healer and damage dealer. The best is when I'm healing and the damage classes are telling me how to heal.

It's like fuck you. I let them die when they do that. Yeah, that's a good lesson. Yeah, it's like, oh, I guess I should have been doing a better job in our office politics in gaming. I think I hate people like in general. I hate people that come up and give you fucking advice and you don't ask them for it. Drives me fucking crazy. Why are you looking at me? I'm not not you you were there. We went roller skating us we took millie roller skating for the first time yesterday. Were you roller skating wrong? No she was great like she first like she couldn't even

stay up because it was her first time in roller skating. She's five and she's never been a roller skating. Yeah and then by the end of the day like she fell down so many times but she was smiling the whole time she didn't cry once. But the end of the day she like she felt that so many times, but she was smiling the whole time she didn't cry once. But the end of the day, she was like skating, like she felt that a few times. And then the fucking guy who's like, tats some kids, like Mr. Roller's Skate. He was like doing flips and he kept like, he was like, he was flipping the kid over and he's like, you know, triple axis, sort of like, triple axis. It was like, he's like, the roller skating pro. I think he's like, he's the ringer

So anyway, he was like he came up because he thinks he's fucking you know all that and it was like You were trying really hard out there today He's like you know what you should do is get on the carpet and start practicing on the carpet And we're like fuck you she's been fine on the big you know circuit the whole day like yeah, I was really I was really You know, it's like now get down like this and then easy right up and I'm just and she was just like so does she do better when you move to the carpet? No, no She already knew how to skate it happened. No, but it's like I don't know I was really proud of her and then I felt like he came up at the end when she should be feeling good And it's tried to like get her to be like you tried to remedialize her

Like she went from not being never having roller skates on her feet to being able to roller skate by herself by the end of the day Mm-hmm being never having roller skates on her feet to being able to roller skate by herself by the end of the day. Make sure to go like short distances, but she could do it, you know, and she was fine. And then he came up and was just like trying to give her all this advice. And I just got super annoyed with that. And he kept like telling to us like what we should do to make her more confident. I'm like she's confident. She's fallen out all this time. She's been laughing the whole time.

She's been up and doing it. She doesn't have a confidence issue. Don't come here and start talking about carpet. Griffin's an anti-carpet for the rest of the world. But that happens. I just say hey don't people just come up and they think that they can advise you. It's like, who the fuck are you to come up and tell me how to do something? Mr. Roller's Gate, that's who he is. It was on a shirt.

We got to take another break for another Drunk Tank animated adventure. This is the new one we show at our TXU of the week. So I'll check this out. It's a new drunk tank animated adventure. And we'll go back. I heard that your kid threatened your wife with physical violence. She did. The other day, Emily said, Mom, I want to watch a movie.

I want to watch I think Total Roar or some shit. Griffin said, no, no, we're going to go to the grocery store. You can watch the movie later, maybe if you're a good girl. Emily said, Mommy, it would be sad if you broke your nose. I could say, excuse me. And she goes, I'm saying, it would hurt really bad if you broke your nose. I could just excuse me and she goes, I'm saying it would hurt really bad if you broke your nose. It would be sad. And Chris goes, are you threatening me?

And really goes, you'd have to get a new nose and that would hurt. She's like a mafia style fucking chasing. I don't know why. Boy, you got a lot of nice things right here, Mommy. It's because I'm a dumb god broken. Yeah, so I don't know where she got that from, but I mean, she watches the Godfather a lot.

Did you see the video of that A380 hitting that little plane? That reinforces a rant about air travel. Exactly. Imagine if you're one of two cunts sitting in a plane, right? And you've got your fucking camera out and you're browsing through your photos of your fucking dog and all of a sudden your plane does a 90 degree turn. You don't have any teeth left because you just ate that fucking camera Or it flies out of your hand and hits a baby in the eye You just blinded a baby because you wanted to show your friend cute pictures of your fucking dog That's the sound of a delicious snack Come here. I'll put some of you nuts in my mouth. Come on. Oh, what? Well, you had a momentary day of weakness. You were like get out by goals. I was right

I was right So the day we had the meeting you were there. You were there. I was right. So the day we had the meeting, you were there. You were there. I don't think you were there. I think this is in commodities. DIY. DIY is up 33% since that day. So as a visa, like 25% as a 25%. No one knows what you're talking about. Three. Like do you understand this? If you go back, if you go back, check podcasts for two years ago. We go to what's as arrangers. as if the rangers are gonna be in the world series everything I'm over it you can't stop me I have no idea what we're talking about

I don't know how to be already loose track. We were talking about games or something What do you have the moonshine in your hands Joel? This is a greatest label ever All right awesome why why is that? It just looks so who made and stuff? Well, you put it in a jar and it automatically lays true the jars do a 90% of the work there It's like authenticity so you got authenticity authenticity authenticity authenticity If you're holding the jar, you can say anything that anyway you want to yeah, that's right All you have to have is the jar and two shots of those cherry. It's got label on a label. Fucking on. I think that stuff is a 100 proof. It's

here to present alcohol by volume. 100 proof. Hey, so this is from where did we get this? Dan Jitsu from the website gave it to us during RTX. Oh, I guess Mr. Yeah. Oh, you done. Yeah, I did. Sorry. I had a chair. I'll give you a shout out. It's cool. He's a very cool guy. Yeah. You find a kill us, but he's trying to damage me internally. Not the way you do. Aw, it's fun. He's such a death of me.

What? Nothing. We've known each other a lot longer than I've known you. It's a legacy thing. A legacy support? Yeah. Um, I feel like we had a point that we were making earlier. Yeah, I don't know about that. You were complaining about roller skates. That's what we're talking about.

I don't know. We can leave it. We can let it go. Long story short, our kid can roller skate, but we're not allowed to go back to that roller skating rink. We're slowly marking things off. The things like we can't go in Austin. Yeah. Every place that didn't hire me when I was looking for work. Yeah, it's adding up. Yeah, it is. We're gonna say something Brandon Yeah, I think everybody forgot what we were talking on the last segment is the in-between conversation was fucking depressing We started off with Hitler and then where did we go AIDS? Nobody's got That's not a depressing conversation. We should stop talking between takes.

Like we should have a no-talking rule. Nobody's got it. That's it. Welcome to the plug. What are we going to endorse from it? Tag line, baby. Tag line. So we started initial RTX year two planning.

Yeah, how's that going? Slow. Yeah. We got time to plan though. You said that now. I can't wait to talk to you in nine months. Well, I mean, you have to get them pretty fun advance. Yeah, that was funny that we now I shouldn't talk about our hook. Well, I do it. It seems like if you don't see my grip and don't don't be a job. Don't be a job. I'm gonna do it. Um, when we were first, uh, after we we got the

spike in attendees and we were trying to figure out what to do with them, we to find a hotel that could accommodate so we were looking calling around the different hotels in Austin And like we out downtown we got kind of laughed out of there like oh you mean this year Yeah, they were like yeah, they were literally like oh, I thought you bit me of 2012 you mean like in a month Oh, no, no, no way And it's like and just so you know you're stupid for trying yeah Like really condescending and off. But when we got to our hotel, they were like, they did the same thing. They're like, this year, I'll see what I can do.

And then they were like, you're back and they were fine. But that was like one of the major selling points that they were available. And they did a great job. Yeah, yeah. I was actually going to tell you, when we weren't expecting anything, because we weren't really sure about it, but we went in. It was actually really cute. I liked the decor.

Did you guys get up to the higher floors at all? No. It's like a fucking palace over there. We were down in lower floors, where it was water damage. What were you doing in the upper floors? I was trying to get breaking into the hotel. Luckily, I got in. Oh, good.

Why were you breaking into the hotel? I didn't want to go around in the lobby and hit the long way so I just came straight from the garage And then all the doors were locked so I just kept going up and down trying to find a way in luckily I got in the rich floor And then like people I was like walking by and they were like just like these like old people just like staring at me like you know So were there guys with like top hats and monocles walking through the halls they were eating I was trying to get out of the hotel in an easy way myself and so I went down I found some staircase I went down to the bottom and it said you know don't go through door alarm will sound which I ran into the same scenario in Toronto and I was sort of like fuck it I'm just gonna go through the goddamn door and so I went the door and close the door and an alarm sound Oh it did? Yeah sure did and then I was trapped in a building and I ran through the building and there was another door, don't hit this door or a larm will sound that one went to

You were just sitting up alarm that you're going to go and I was scot free then I was scot free and I was walking down Did you think the second one would cancel out the first one? Well at that point it was sort of like just you know Well, you didn't one bad thing another bad thing. So two negatives would be a positive, right? Yeah, I had an incident when I first moved to Austin Kind of similar to that where my mom was in town I was looking for stuff to do and I read in the paper on like a Thursday that they were gonna reopen the UT Tower Which was closed in the 60s after shooting after the shooting yeah And I hadn't been open in 40 years and I thought well, we'll just go to that and I guess between Thursday and the Saturday I went they decided not to reopen the tower, but I didn't see that paper. So I took my mom and then the building was open and there was some

stuff under construction and we went buy some construction tape. Long story short, we ended up kind of in the tower, trapped and we couldn't get out. And going up and down floors, kind of like Joel, trying to find ways in and out. And then finally we were stuck on like a basement floor and we had to stand there until the construction worker let us out. How long were you there for? Probably an hour. Wow. Yeah. And I actually got to the floor where the tower was on but I couldn't get past that later of security. I have in there. What's up? I've been there. Yeah. Yeah. It's good to stay well. To the other. You know, here by thing I don't understand. I understand that

yeah, it's a problem. The guy got on the tower and shot a bunch of people. But there are lots of towers I am really completely with this. This is like let's just open up the tower Like did they think if they open the tower just a gun is gonna come? Yeah, it's like don't allow guns in the tower This is not gonna stop somebody so he wants to go shoot people everybody know there was a pro gun policy There's only one for the shooting. I'm sure there was no policy You know it was crazy the tower got so damaged because normal people,

just like private citizens, took their guns to the tower and were shooting at the guy. And they're just blowing the shit at the tower. It totally supports every Texas stereotype out there. Yeah. They were trying to get a cattle at the tower. They were trying to knock it over. They were fighting for justice in the American way.

Isn't Rick Harry trying to allow students at UT to be able to carry guns in the classrooms now? There's there's I don't know I think that law got stripped down. There was a proposal for and they're fighting me at TSA right now You said that he did there was a law now about Sonograms right for abortion patient It got past so now a woman in Texas wants to get an abortion, she has to look at a sonogram. She has to look it up. She's required to get a sonogram. And then she has been, she can refuse to be shown up, but she has to sign an affidavit saying that she's so much more expensive. So how did the gun work into this? That's a good question. Can we check her up with religion next?

I'm not saying one thing or another about abortion. I think it's interesting. It's like if we're having problems with money, why forcing tests on people. How am I going to edit our previous conversation into our next conversation, cutting this one out? You should do a girl talk podcast, where you just have everything together style.

Yeah, it doesn't have to make sense. You're okay with talking about Hitler, but like, can't talk about it. Everyone knows Hitler's bad. It's not an ambiguous discussion. But you said you think Hitler's good? No, he doesn't. But Interstate, there is a few way. Hitler was a sonogram at some point.

Let's get real. So you bring up an excellent point? It all ties in. Maybe if his mom had been forced to see that sonogram, I should have said it's some of the tiny little mustache. She would have known. That is not good. Something weird about it.

We could take care of this. He ruined that mustache. He did. He ruined the name and the mustache for... You can never have a mustache like that again. Do you know who's got the Hitler mustache? Fucking Michael Jordan. Have you seen him lately?

Oh yeah, he does. He's got the only got the Hitler mustache. Yeah, he does. I don't know what this is going to back there. He's got Michael Jordan. He is Michael Jordan. I saw him on a commercial day and I was like, oh, I'm going to be a little bit more He does he only got the Hitler mustache. Yeah, he does He's got he's you know, he's Michael Jordan. He is Michael Jordan. I saw him on a commercial day, and I was like Yeah, that's a little bit interesting choice. Let me test how people how much people really like me Yeah, no, he's like a big a Michael Jordan do wrong. Let's see I mean, he's pretty much a symbol at this point. He's not even a person anymore

Michael Jordan is a sat guy I get murdered you because of gambling this gambling that's well, he got murdered for no reason for no reason But there wasn't related and he's he gambles like crazy. I don't get I don't get I can't think because I've never been to that it so there's never been anything in Tyson you're sitting next to the right person didn't eat had his wife too. Did he? I thought he did. Maybe I'm on I heard that. Yeah. What I'm getting him a magic on what I do. What I do is not gambling. I'm getting your legs broken and getting shot or whatever.

Like how does that become exciting? Like you're losing money, losing, losing, losing. What point is it like, okay, maybe I usually, usually the winning, winning, winning. Because you're losing. You're just book-playing tickets. It's a system. It's a thing. It's a jack-to-go. You gamble whether or not you're going to be going.

The gamble is Will Joel show up in Vegas. No, no, it's just a jack-to-go. There were two. There were books written about it. It's absolutely fascinating about these guys in MIT. It's an amazing story. Someone from the website sent me one of those books. Doesn't really like that. The U-Dionic 5.

Terrible movies, but the true stories underneath them are incredibly fascinating. And they started at LLC. Yeah, in the book, I read that they had built little computers that sat in their shoes that wirelessly transmitted. And they would like. This is a different.

Yeah, they would like step down on their heels to indicate pluses or minus. Yeah, no, no, no, no, this is not I think this is not what I'm talking about It's also an MIT. This is like a more advanced Well, there was a there was a group in the 60s and then there was a group in the 90s. There's two different groups I think you know that when Joel was in high school in the we were Essentially, I think Joel's thinking to bring you down the house. It was really funny They made that movie and they changed all the characters to be white because they're actually all Asian in the story Because that's one of the reasons they got away with it. Was it called 21?

Or was it bringing me to the movie with 21? I think the book is in the book they explained that If they were all white they they guess would have been more suspicious that they were counting Because they confused them with like a lot of travelers from Asia who would come in and maybe you know just spend money. That's how they kind of slipped under the radar. We have a lot more white though, but there's a Russian guy. The Russian guy was like, I'm pretty sure they were all predominantly Asian.

And then in the movie, I'm sure more than two groups have done this. I'm sure, well, maybe the movie 21 and the movie I'm sure more than two two groups have done this. I'm sure well Maybe the movie 21 and Let's what you and Jack we're gonna do and you got cold feet You had some computers in your shoes no, no, no, I don't need anyone Yeah, yeah, I don't need anyone. I do just I do just fine. Why aren't you going? What's the most river lost? What's the most I've ever lost? I lost about... I shouldn't get into this. I lost about $5,000 and a half an hour.

I think that would be the end of me. But if one more. But then you win. I'm going to get it back. You keep going. Did you get it back? On that particular trip? I did not but that was Sunday afternoon Okay, what's the most you've ever won? I don't talk about that I don't know what you're dressed. What did you buy?

That's not very much. I mean it's not very much of the big picture. I mean that's small stuff That's all small stuff. No, but I'm asking you specifically how much you've won. What's the most you've ever won at one time? Just answering my question. It's very easy. I don't want to argue with you, Griffin. You say that to me all the time. Like who's arguing? Who's just having a conversation? No, no. Your wife is relentless. I don't know. That's like a war report here. What's the CIA or something? I don't understand why. There's a lot of questions about that. I didn't ask you. I didn didn't ask you to pay taxes on it or what you did with the money.

I'm just asking you. I'm trying to find out. Now you're in dining among tax fraud. Technically I've never won any money, Griffin. Tax of Oceans. Okay. No, if you can, I just want to see, I don't understand the appeal of gambling. If you can lose 5,000 in a half an hour period

What is the appeal how much can you win? $5,000 what's the most you've ever won? I'll you'll I'll teach you the system. We all learn I've been trying to teach him the system He won't get any of this system. Do you? Yeah, I even have that app on my phone great Just so we're all clear just so we're all clear when you're playing there's no computers or well It's just it's you learn it It's just to learn it's there's a one way to play and then Count it. Joe. What's your desktop? What's your desktop background? You're computer. Joe. What's your desktop background? Joe it is the blackjack chart

Joe That's it right there. That's the system for six-deck shoe. Yeah For six-deck shoe six-deck six-deck shoe deck shoe, yeah. Six deck shoe. Six deck six deck shoe. It's different if you've got less if you got less decks or more decks than it's different. But traditionally it's six decks. How many what's the how many eight is about how many decks are they normally serve in Vegas. Usually six but you now they've been uping into eight. So playing a Hollywood Spinole eight which kind of caught me by surprise but the rules are almost the same for me. You guys it's better for the house.

Yeah, well, it makes it harder because now you're trying to count into eight and to say six. Just more work. I know. No, but I'm here. So anyways. Have you taken any back rooms and vacations? Why am I working? No, no, no, no, no.

Why am I destroying my whole life over a podcast? What, for what reason am I no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no Probably not good. That would be the cherry and there's video proof of it. Joel's in a row is like, no, I'm not going to cite this story. I think of all the embarrassing things that we've shared on this podcast and you won't even tell me how much I'm definitely not running for president at this point. That's out, that's out, out. Just tell me how much fucking money you made at one time. No, I can't tell you later. Oh my god, I'm so mad. You don't tell you later.

Relentless. This is what it's like to be married by the way. Alright. Joel's not sharing, so do you guys want to move on? Yeah, let's the way. Alright. You're gonna start sharing. So do you guys want to move on? Yeah, let's move on. We're not talking about gambling anymore. We can move on.

We're talking about gambling. We're just talking about gambling. We're just listening to spending at E3. Um, like it's according to Xbox.com, Halo 4. That's a pretty, that's a pretty big deal. Do you think, I mean, we'll know by the time this podcast comes out what the truth is, but do you think maybe it was just a bluff? I don't know. Yeah, it's a good question. We'll know in

45 minutes. Is it 45? I think it will know in 10 minutes Which means oh shit, you're right. We will yeah, we'll know in 10 minutes see the little hands on the four when the little hand gets down there You'll be set What else what else you anticipating I don't know there's a the best thing about you three is it's Stuff you don't anticipate yeah stuff that comes out of nowhere. Yeah, the surprises Supposed there's a rumor that there's a connect on rails gear shooter coming which sounds I don't like on I don't like on rail stuff either But they'll be interested to see corp you know core games being

Integrated into connect. I don't I mean I core games being integrated into Connect. I don't, I mean, I prefer Connect to move, but one thing move has over Connect is it has a button. So like for trigger pulling for precise timing, Connect, I don't know how you would do that. So I don't understand. Yeah, but it's also not precise. It's the the system interpreting it versus like an actual physical button. Yeah, I don't know. Like late latency. See, see, I don't trust the system to interpol versus like an actual physical button. Yeah, I don't know.

Like late latency. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See. See.. See from E3. E3? Oh wait, you said that they might be announcing Fable 4, is that right? There was a rumor that they were going to announce a new game called Fable the Journey. Okay. Because somebody, I found a domain registration for that. So I can't tell you if I'm excited about that or not. Why is that?

Because Fable, you know, I say that I didn't enjoy, but I think that I just didn't play far enough. With Fable 2, I enjoyed the game much more after I beat it. And it was all the stuff afterwards that came that I liked. And Fable 3, I got to that point and I was about to jump into that and then my fucking game was my save game was correct. And now I have to start over. And I can do it. It'll go a lot faster because I don't have to worry about getting the achievements that slowed down. But not falling. Not falling, being ultimately good. Let me be hint.

It doesn't. It doesn't get better. Yeah, because they took, they, being ultimately good. Let me, yeah, let me be hint. It doesn't. It doesn't. It doesn't get better. Yeah, because they took, they simplified it. Yeah, people three was a little bit. So that's what it was. But then there was some stuff they didn't simplify. Like, it was over, I felt like the game was overly simplified. But then when you were property managing, there was no way to toggle like an auto repair

on other buildings. It was the only problem I had that gave. It was like a robot or the, it was a repair stuff. But the map, and fabled three-minute a lot more than you. But it was at least with the map. But the map in Fable 3 made it a lot easier to manage your property, so. Yeah, but the map also ruined, like traveling and open world stuff. The map wasn't a map, first of all.

You couldn't look at that map and figure out where you were in correlation at all at any point. It was useless. Yeah, like you didn't know where you were. No, yeah. No, that's true. It's an insult to me. And the thing that I enjoyed about Fable 2

was the complicated, how it complicated the social stuff was, so it was more challenging, it was more interesting. And today, streamed line it to the point where there was no point in doing that stuff anymore. Right, right. So. Like, the best part about Fable 2 was watching your wife's character go anywhere and watching townspeople just run. She was a bad character.

Yeah, she was. She didn't get mad. She took all the money and let her dog die and she was mad that people didn't like her. Yeah She plays the game how she wants yeah, everyone could play the third one way we played a dungeon the dragons with her and like within the first 10 minutes She had murdered somebody in the party and With the person of rape can you somebody of raping her? She got to get that the conflict going quick. You can't really get it.

She was fun to play with. And she's actually really good at miniature painting. Yeah. She was miniatures. She did like patterns and everything. That's true. On the clothing. She got an eye for detail.

Yeah, I don't know much. I know more about her characters than I do her about her own life. She's mysterious. Yeah. She doesn't like too many people to know about her because she doesn't want to leave a trail. You wife might be a serious. She's just going to disappear.

She might. I'm I would if it's one of those things were like, you see she doesn't make me stay out of the shed. You were like, I understand. Bill was such a quiet neighbor. He never had a home. You I if I would I love your wife. I love hanging out with her.

But if I turned on the news one night and you were dead and they were and like one of your neighbors It was also one of my neighbors was like yeah, I never suspected Esther We know there's gonna be next now the the new Austin the Austin Stnerger or whatever I like I just had to think that I could live next to woman who killed 47 nerds Yeah, I could live a nice woman who killed 47 nerds. I would be like, yeah, I could see that. Okay, thinking that I, another pet people might, if you guys want to know, is that the people that are,

this isn't a plan to your wife, I love your wife, and she's actually really spunky. I don't know if I can, it's just really fun, and mean and all the great, you guys work really well together, I think, for that reason. But people that are, assume that they're nice because they're quiet I fucking hate that when people are like this person's it adds nothing to the conversation. Oh, they're so nice

Yeah, oh, they're so nice this person's so nice. It's like you don't know anything about this person They just didn't open their mouth and so you that's the thing is you can say about them. It drives me crazy All right, well, we got to wrap this up. I'm sorry guys Yeah, we're watching everyone and we'll be back next week with an audio podcast. Tata. Describe the show to a newcomer in a more familiar way. Do you like apples? Example.

Together in Trempit hosts, Characombs, Characombs are free to deal with nothing to do with this podcast. Analyze various unsolved and rooster teeth cryptic podcast, face. Call to action. Feel free to add something show premise specific, but short. Listen to show name on Apple Spotify or wherever you get podcasts.

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