Rooster Teeth Podcast - RT Podcast #141

Episode Date: November 23, 2011

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It's time to put your pedal to the metal. From the twisted minds behind Deadpool and Zombieland, an executive producers, Will Arnett and Anthony Mackie comes the new Peacock original series, Twisted Metal, a high-oxane action comedy based on the classic video game series. Anthony Mackie stars as John Doe, a motormouth outsider who must deliver a mysterious package across a post-apocalyptic wasteland. If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnett, and Thomas Hayden Church.

Twisted metal, streaming now, only on Peacock. We're gonna be even games, so insane. Sports and cats and moans on planes. Bernie Gus, Jeff, Joe Gax. Rooster teeth production. It's the jump tank. It's the Rooster Teeth podcast. That is a really, really, really interesting intro. I don't think I can really do is date them by who's named in the podcast intro.

We should talk in that cadence. I believe this one is really old. You guys have a real big problem in your hands today because they asked me to do the old timey voice all night last night for the intro to these uh past casts that we're doing now on YouTube. So you guys are in for a treat. Oh I got no problem with the old timey voice. I know some of our little energy JB loves the old time you boys. Mr. Buckess. Yeah, I wonder if we're gonna start calling up individual podcast listeners. I wonder if he likes you think specifically for them. Our impression of him Do you think he likes that? Probably not. What it was, it was that like. Uh, whatever. It's like you started a typical Internet upset person. I mean, I've really paid all these flicking cats. It funny, because I follow him on Facebook and the only thing that I see that he posts are like the cute dog pictures, so they have weird dogs.

It doesn't match at all with my idea of what he's like, so it's really weird. It's strange and weird. All right, yeah, we should do introductions. Yes, we should do introductions. Introduction. Hello ladies and gentlemen, thank you for joining us today on this podcast, a modified audio broadcast brought to you by Rupert Heath Productions To my left, you're right if you're watching at home is that snake charmer for the Far East that

Play avoid Frag Nathana Kater of all things economic Mr. Joseph Heyman And his left my right if you're watching at home is that bright young Anjaneu Emily Hagen's plucked from America's hot land young Anjunu, Emily Hagen's plucked from America's hot land. Fulipith and vinegar, and a sense of naivete. But what dox, secrets lie behind that fresh face? Find out on today's episode! I'm your announcer, Bernie Burns, and with me, as always, is the host of the Rooster Podcast, the Mexican guy.

So, I think you got the description to sub-confused. We're not in your background. What do you want to be the Mexican guy to do? Well, the Mexican guy to do. Do do current social constraints, the Mexican guy and the mixing guy today? I'll be the mixing guy today. Do do. Currants also will contract the mixing guy and the white girl will not be appearing in scenes together.

Races. That's the way the time was. That's the way the time was. We put out that past cast the other day and every time I saw someone editing together I would just lean over their ear and go. Racist. Totally racist. I mean everyone's super paranoid about what they were doing.

Well, we should probably introduce Emily, since she's joining us in the podcast for the very first time. How's it going, Emily? Good. Emily, you have never been on the podcast before, right? No. Okay, how do we describe Emily to our audience? She is a girl that took $100 from me and the first poker tournament that we had.

That's her shoes. That is how we met her. She's like, hi, Emily, give me $100. And she's like, t-hee'm Emily, give me $100. She's like, t-he-he, what? And then, yeah. All of a great deal. There was like, how many people was that?

That was like the biggest to date. That was the biggest poker tournament. How many people were there? Well, I'm sure it was completely legal. I was screwed. That was about 30 people or 40 people. 30 people. So you made like a million dollars that night.

You placed third if I remember correct. Is there third if you're first? No, third or fourth, but there were a lot of people that that right who is first and second Do you remember? I don't know I'm just Eric Eric no way second. I think yeah, so this is the ain't it cool I don't know if we want to name names They named names, yeah, but mr. B you on second place They named names. Yeah, but Mr. V won second place. Exactly. Exactly.

We'll use all of our internet names. So Quint won first place. Because that's totally untraceable. No, no, no, who internet names are. Exactly right. Where would you look them up? I remember when I was a big deal when no one wanted to like their real name or identity known on the internet.

Now, I think thanks to Facebook, no one gives a fuck anymore. Yeah, it's true. And I like this better a little bit, but I also like preserving anonymity in some places of the internet too. I like anonymity with accountability, if that makes sense. An anonymity with a kind of like, if you fuck up, it comes back at you. If you fuck up, people can go through channels

to find out who you are, and you can pay consequences for your actions. What's the benefit of anonymity? You get honest opinions. Yeah, people aren't worried about. So I feel like the only, I feel like with with anonymity the only opinion you get is that sucks I don't have sex with you. I feel like that's what that's honest I mean in a way it's honest because even if something's okay

You're getting the bitterness of people who are you I mean you can read through that you know, does that make sense? I mean no one's gonna write I'm completely jealous of what you're doing, you know They're not gonna write that but they hate everything all the time. Yeah, you kind of get the idea that they are jealous They hate every single thing they come across. I saw some hateful comments in the last Ruchitanme Adventure people said that we sucked it compared to Ricky Trevace which I thought was good criticism very apt I mean well if you look at the ratio and you look at the ratio of money made, you know I'm not good. We lose to the professional writer and comedian comedian? Yes, okay good. He's doing a good job I'm pretty sure our podcasts are right on par in terms of revenue generation

I'm pretty sure I don't know if there's any money in the money. I mean the user's getting the deal there What do we like doing to 10 times podcast? And we've made about 10 bucks. Don't oh shit. I wish we would we could have made enough money to buy pizza That's my goal If that happened then we'd have to give half the pizza probably Apple Probably they don't like pepperoni. They would literally you would literally get to see the buy the part of the Buy tank in 33 and you would have to be anchovies. Yeah, you have no They're only difficult and then Joel would eat the pizza on my

while banging the table. Okay, speaking of Apple, I had a bit of a problem with them this week. Uh-huh. We, you know, we have like 20 computers here in the office, and I wanted to upgrade them all to, this is my technical rant portion of the podcast. I was upgrading them all to the newest version of the Mac operating system. Ryan, how's that going?

It's done now. But to do this, you have to buy it from their online store from the app store So I had to make a user account for every computer to then buy Lion and download it Well, I made about three accounts then Apple locked my ability to make new accounts because they it was suspicious activity So to contact iTunes support and go to like suspicious you buy operating system Yeah, they go to like three days of back and forth with them to be able to make accounts to buy their fucking software to upgrade our computers. So what you're saying is that Apple has trouble with business level transactions enterprise level transactions. I find the shocking. Yeah, a company that's such a rich history of business software. We have difficulty doing a multi-licensed purchase. That was my big fear with like digital distribution for the operating system and going forward.

It's like, it's just gonna be more fucking bullshit like that. Why can't you buy more than one copy? What's the logic? I don't know, maybe they thought I had a stolen credit card and was making a bunch of fake accounts and it would be more difficult for them to lock it in the future. I hate that you came up with a pretty good reason like right away.

Like I couldn't think of anything and you just like, yeah, this is the reason it totally makes sense. But you know what's the other thing that I can't stand about Apple is that when you go on iTunes and you go to download music and it says hey you've already bought you know Fergie's for delicious track more you've already done this are you sure you want to buy it again or cancel it's like if you have the intelligence to tell me that I bought it just let me download the fucking thing again you know what I mean and that's built, but you can't do that with music.

I think they're gonna start doing that now. You can do it with apps, and I think you can do it with movies. I think you can. I think with the latest iTunes update, and once back full circle here to our introduction of Emily. So one of the things that I've been doing this year is I am, I have a season pass to the Walking Dead, the new season of the Walking Dead, which season two, correct? Yes. And so, it's set to automatically download from iTunes when a new episode is available. It literally downloads to all my devices.

I mean, this thing is just, I choose choose is chewing up so much bandwidth in the world I mean, that's about five minutes. Let me guess it downloads a HD and SD version both and the HD and SD version of the behind the scenes Which who gives a fuck about that? That's annoying. Yeah, that's annoying. Two more files and then how do you like okay? If I don't want the SD version? I don't know. I'm having the same I decided to go back and find a start watching season one of the walking dead So I'm having the same problem ironically with the same show really where it's like every time I launch iTunes now I I have downloads automatically starting like no stop stop stop stop stop stop pause all and then you have and then you say

Okay, well, I want to download the HD version so you say resume that one and then the SD one sits there paused Basically forever you can't delete it say I don't want to download I don't like the state of not knowing where I'm at I don't like the idea of like when I approach iTunes, I don't know what device is where, what's happening, and what the download is, like I update my iPhone now, and like I use a Bluetooth in my car on the iPhone, and it's like, now it won't play.

And it's like, you got, now you got to turn your iPhone on, you got to go to the iPod, and then you have to manipulate the volume first before the Bluetooth is going to work, which is like, what, why is that now? So that's a big pain in the back. I just, I don't like it when the rules change every time I download something.

And they always do. DRM stuff is like you're just dealing with it. Like where do I own this product? It's like not that I just own it. That's not enough. Where do I own it? I think I cloud helping with that, but it's also causing a problem.

It helps because you now, like I said, you own it on all your devices, but you're fucking downloading it on all your devices. Right. And you don't want that. Right. Especially when you consider when I was in New Zealand, I mean, there's a lot of people in a lot of markets that they don't have unlimited internet access. They have a really tight limit. Man, Australian internet access sucked, didn't it? I mean, yeah. Like Apple is like engineered to work at America. I can't imagine how bad it must be over there because it's just all the hoops you got to jump through and yeah every hotel we went and stayed at in Australia and New Zealand

They had the same plan which was a screw you I'm gonna throw this out there It was like 20 bucks Australian or New Zealand a day and you would get 500 megs, right? And then you could download and then if you hit that 500 megs Then it would throttle you for the day Mm-hmm. I mean take you down to like 2,400-bod modem speeds I went from a novetel to a novetel and the rules changed between the two different novetels We're one it gave me what you just described it. You're from one hotel to another both owned by the same change Exactly. Yeah, and the second one it was like okay. I understood that. Why did you clarify?

I don't think people who haven't been overseas would know nobody tells not a big big joke thing in the United States I'm just trying to fucking help fight fight fight kiss this one day it's gonna work anyways so you go there and it's like and then I got to the second it was like more upscale or whatever I was like oh I was like you guys what does he mean by upscale fancy here fight fight fight kiss alright so like I go there and it's like oh you can just kind of do whatever I'm like oh I can just kind of do whatever when I just go pass a splash page no problem and then like I describe this earlier It's like all of a sudden two hours in and I get in trouble and it puts me to a page like that's it you're done

You can't use any more internet right and not only this you broke this rule and you broke this rule And you owe at least as much for this breaking this rule and you would let you at least as my ring that rule I broke two rules and I owed them at least $100 at least well at least you could pay for for to keep going when it's throttle me I didn't even have the option to wait 24 hours is it not really cut me off at that point what's it getting this bad golden time out which means you wasn't allowed to use it anymore they listen seriously it's like a casino or something we're just like you can't you're not allowed to do It's like the internet was holding you by your ankles over the edge of a building You're like shaking the money. I'm I am high. I'm running into this all the time now where it's like

Yeah, you're not allowed to spend your own money. I'm running into this constantly That's what I ran into. Yeah, I couldn't I couldn't buy another block of 500 megs I just had to suffer through 24 hundred bud moden speeds for 24 hours Which sucks? This is like this is like it's like the credit crunch, right? Where it's like all said, no, no, all credit's gone. You're not allowed to do anything. No, I have nothing like that.

Why do you bring everything back to some weird global economic situation? It's exactly like that. Not everything relates to that. They'll relate to it. They've overprinted internet. They've overprinted internet. The market saturated.

It's data-based. So Gus, when you're at home, how many devices do you have that are connected to iTunes? Like five that's a then that's your limit, right? Well, I have two different accounts one for me one for my wife. So my account that that's that's getting really complicated Yeah, my account has three yeah three Okay, so you're downloading everywhere. So you let's say you download a 4 gig episode of Walking Dead. That's 12 gigs of bandwidth being transferred. And eight of it's kind of a waste.

Right. I mean, it's hard to consider data a waste, but it is. I mean, these are limited resources. When you have limited, you know, hard drive space on your iPad or whatever. Yeah. Yeah, but you have to do that every now and then you have to say, okay, today I just want to let it run and let it download all the SD episodes. And then I'm just gonna delete them

Does it use like when you Sink with an iPhone does it use the SD version for the iPhone or does it use the HD version? I think you can specify oh yeah, yeah, well that's convenient. I normally put it specify not the fucking I don't know the other ones. I normally put the HD on my iPhone just in case I want to stream it to my Apple TV Okay, but I guess now you can stream stuff on the Apple TV you've already purchased and maybe I wouldn't be doing that anymore. Make sense?

How's that show, by the way? The zombie show. So here, Emily and I have found a great solution to dealing with all these downloads and all that stuff. Oh, we do get extra episodes when we do this. So last night we went to, I was just today, Tuesday. I just was two nights ago We went to spoiler were recording early. Oh, yeah, we recorded early cuz thanks to even weeks

Sorry, we went to the Alamo draft house because they show the walking dead there And then you get all the animal food and the whole Alamo experience including some guy that gets up between They're the brakes and cracks jokes that we determine doesn't work at the Alamo Yeah, just a guy who stood up and cracked jokes in front of the audience So I mean that they're they're just broadcasting TV so here's a there's a there's a legal thing there where they can't charge you to get in So you basically just have to commit to so much amount of food which by the way That's exactly how it works at our poker tournament exactly why it's totally legally you have to get the house five doggy cheeseburger our chips are literally chips That's right

So Eric got them in eighth them all exactly So they're so they're showing is it amc? Yeah, amc so it's like it It shows I don't know what time is like nine at night or something They delay it so they show the previous weeks episode and then they show you the new one And that's cool to like a two-hour deal But you sit through commercials and I will say this that I mean the walking dead that by the way That is the slow it Must be a metaphor for the chambling undead. I heard it is the slowest moving show. We are like eight

A billion of new seasons They're still doing the same thing they were doing in the first episode Didn't they cut like the budget on that or something like that? Yeah, I think Frank Derr bought left. Yeah, no, they fired him Oh really? Yeah, they should can't him and then they and then there was a big hubbub and I thought they brought him back Oh, so how many how many emphasis are they into on the new season? I think eight seven or eight at this point. Is it how's it to last season next next season their next week is they're gonna hit They're what they call their midseason finale. That's a new thing that you on cable shows. Yeah, that'll start The battle's for collect. Thank you trying to create media season 4.5 and stuff like that. And that would they called it?

Yeah, it a K the season I never watched. I've watched the first two episodes of The Walking Dead. And it's okay, but it's just kind of plotting along. But the first season was really good? I mean, that's what I'm watching. I'm still on the first season. And it's okay. I don't have a problem with it,

but I think maybe people will have oversold it to me. Have you guys, has anyone sat there the entire first season? I have. Yeah, me too. And you guys, has anyone sat there the entire first season? I have, yeah, me too. Yeah, and you guys, I've seen every episode of you guys. Well, the first season was just six episodes. I'm gonna piss off a lot of people by saying this, or I'm gonna piss off a few people who are very vocal. I hated the graphic novels.

I tried to slog to those things, and that was just like, it's kind of like my complaint about the show, honestly, so I guess it's true to the source material, and that it's like, okay, we're the fuck at the zombies. I mean I'm reading a graphic novel about zombies. I want to see some more zombies. It's like boxing Yeah, where's the hitting Yeah, I was promised hitting there's no Jack went to that Pacquiano fight the other day, uh-huh, and he's it was 12 rounds and a split decision

I said that's a fucking nightmare that isn't nightmare 12 rounds of boxing. Yeah, I don't get it Like with you a C coming out. It's just I don't see of boxing. Yeah, I don't get it like with UFC coming out It's just I don't see the point. Yeah, I don't know and he said he said we know Fox went through all this hubbub to Broadcast a UFC fight which was a big deal and they promoted the hell out of it and it's on broadcast TV and The fight only lasted 45 seconds is like what a disaster like that's awesome. Yeah, he said no the guy got caught with a Heymaker and was knocked out Actually, it's actual fighting That's what you know it's gonna happen

What dude is gonna punch someone and there's gonna be results It's like you don't want to know to do tugging Third dude coming in No, no, no, no, no Just match in a finesse no fuck the chess match fuck the finesse. I want to see people fight What's in fucking punch each other in the face until one falls over right? I don't want to watch the mental game No, no, I don't want to need the mental game The only mental game I want to see is oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit

It's so good. You can like you appreciate it. It's like watching an episode of cops or something You know, I'm actually kind of surprised Can I tell you that when I see like when there's a UFC match or a boxing match at a bar and a bunch of guys are watching it? I'm always surprised there's not more fights like just the act of like watching the fight makes you like. You know, yeah. Yeah. Why doesn't that happen? Did you see that video? Every you see fight that I go to at a bar, there's always cops stationed at the bar restaurant. So maybe that helps. And the cops are punching people. Did you see that video a couple of weeks ago? There were these two dudes from Oregon who were in Long Beach for like for MMA tournament. Then they were staying at this hotel in Long Beach

and they come down the elevator door open and there's a dude right in front of them robbing the hotel at gunpoint. It's like the two dudes it was like the the teacher and his student who were there for the tournament and they just grabbed the dude and turned him into a pretzel at the security camera footage. I thought the was the elevator door opening, the guy walking by with a gun and they just like grabbing. How awesome is that? God. So when they do like an arm bar or something like that on somebody, that's, in a real

fight, you break the guy's elbow, right? Right. That's what happens. Right. You don't like, oh, and he caps out and you run. I mean, really, you snap, it's what happens? You just, I first came to his joint or yeah, it's joint or something like that. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. Ow. It's amazing back in the day when I used to watch wrestling like the figure four was just, yeah. I know, we were kids. It's like, oh, he's got the chair. Yeah. He's got the seatbelt.

He comes out of an oriental spike. That's what I remember that one. Junkyard dog, you see that. He took his thumb and he put it into your throat and then he put you in a headlock and squeezed his thumb straight into your throat But fortunately, you know, you tuck in the thumb. I went to Austin, Comic Con. That's past weekend But the one before and the million dollar man Ted D. B. Ocee was there. Wow. That's awesome

That's a reference. I wonder how many people are along with the nasty the nasty boys were also there wow was Camala the Ugandan giant there Geez you're pulling out some stuff, right? Pawbosh. The, so if, did you guys see Santa Live, Jason Seagal was on Santa Live this weekend? And he did an unbelievable impression of Andre the Giant. Oh yeah, I saw that.

Ordering the ice cream cone. I can't say, I really like the more absurd Santa Live stuff. Like, I love all of Kristen Wiggs characters I don't know I'm starting to live no no no I Really want to like her, but I have trouble with a lot of her characters What you have I forgot about that you have problem with her. Yeah, hold on Let me show you a photo which will make you no longer have a problem with her

This would be great. What's that? I haven't seen a hundred laughing years. So maybe this will pull me back in Maybe this photo will be the beginning That photo doesn't equate to making me want to laugh or talent. I mean, great. She's wearing a cut off and holding a puppy. Good for her. Yeah, that works for me. You don't find her more attractive because she's so funny. No. Oh, God. I do.

She is talented. She is genuinely talented. No, don't give me wrong. I think she's great in some things. Like, Bridesmaid's. And that makes her hot. She's awesome. Tell. She is genuinely talented. No, don't give me a rock. I think she's great in some things like bridesmaid and that makes her hot She's awesome tell like people by default Emily do you agree with that? I mean there guys that you don't find attractive, but you find a more attractive because they're talented she has to right because you know For the time on the podcast if she's gonna let you railroad guys have nothing to offer

He will railroad you have to answer So wait, sorry about this question Guys you normally would not find attractive. Like they're not your typical type. Right. But you'd like them because they're talented. Either, you know, musically or they're funny or something like that. Yeah, totally. Um, yeah.

Don't interrupt. Don't interrupt. They're my name Nakes. Um, yeah, I guess, I don't know. I'm kind of dorky, so I like other dorky people that are talented and have other interests and aren't just like, hey, so one of the one of texts for 30 years. I gotta say. So Emily is Emily is a bit of a local legend. She is now 19, but we met you. I mean, you just recently had a birthday. We met you when you were 18. Actually, probably I met you when we were 16. And you recently came to work with us when you were 18. And you've directed three feature films. Yes.

That's correct. And your first one you directed when you were, which is unbelievable. I just want to say the audience, it's okay to hate her. It's perfectly acceptable. That feeling of like, and on the internet, and being like, when you don't say, I'm jealous or whatever.

Whatever. Whatever. She's accomplished way more than I have ever. Like still to this point. She's still a top of my. I was having accomplished what she's heard. I was embarrassing. You did three features. So you're about and your last one, the first time I heard about you, your last one, my succuteon romance debuted at South by Southwest. Correct. At the Paramount. Yes. Which is really cool. It's like the theater in Austin, like you know, the red carpet and the big marquee. Was that last year?

This past, 2011. Till March 2011. Yeah. Were you tempted to like, after that's like, kind of off to the races to get something done for South by South by. South by 2012? Yeah, it was kind of funny

because I'd written this short film and I was planning to make it in November. And, but then I decided to write it as a feature. So then, no no I have nothing resolved by still writing that one. What is the deadline for South by? I think it's early December. Yeah like Sunday had started past and that Sunday was in January when they hold it. Like August September I think for some dance. How long was the shoot for that? Soki yeah it was about 14 days of principal photography very long days definitely didn't break any child labor laws

And Super legal up in here when they were working their force to gamble You shot in here in Austin, right? Yeah, yeah, it all takes place at a science fiction convention But a very homemade one so we were able to get away with a lot of things. And so it's all in one location. Oh, it's awesome. So while we're at Walking Dead, all these young guy

waiters who are coming by, they're like, hey, they're like, oh, hey, because we're in the front row, we were sitting there's that weird gap, you know, we're in the front front row, but we're in the good seats. We're in the good seats. And they're like, oh, hey, Emily, how you doing? What's going on of the front row, but you're the good seats. We were the good seats and they're so happy. Oh, hey Emily, how you doing? What's going on?

It's like, hi, how are you? And like, they're bringing a free ice cream. I'm like, where's my free face? There's Jack at the airport. You got free ice cream? You did! I don't want you to make fire. I don't want Tim to fire anybody.

The Alamo for giving away the ice cream. But yeah, for sure, you would chocolate if I'm not mistaken. It was vanilla ice cream, but it was dark. He gave me the smallest spoon in the kitchen. It was like a fourth of a fourth of a teaspoon or something. It was like this big. Did you eat the ice cream with? He's smart. Why don't you just take a round? This will smile at the time. So how many people were in the cast? There were seven pretty important parts in the film

about three main characters The vampire's kind of come and go and different people change and become more important. So I guess seven is a good number That's awesome. Are they all local? Yeah, to me having Kids that feel like real kids and not 30-year-olds on like your gossip girl. That's really important to me. I like how... Why you got a hate on gossip girl? I like gossip girl.

I like a lot of things and I'm a little ashamed of. Are we here? I like when real kids are genuine and awkward and I want to embrace that instead of pretend like it doesn't exist by casting people that are way older and you know Classically beautiful, you know, I just want real kids in my movies. Yeah, I feel like that breaks it a lot of times for me when I watch it I'm here. That's us. Yeah, when I watch a movie there's someone obviously older playing a younger part Yeah, okay, I don't like cause it look up on IMD be like that bitch is 35 So was she 17 I the first time I realized I was in the starship troopers when they were in high school and everyone was 35.

It was their cash per van deen. It wasn't 902 when open everyone was 40 and still in high school. How old was Andrea when they cashed her? They're red kid by then, right? Why is one of the teachers sitting with us? It's funny, it's always been like that too. Like before that point, I think like Dawson's Creek or something like that was the first show where it kind of was like going younger, but before that it was always people who are older.

I remember being in high school looking at people on TV and being like, are they older looking in Hollywood? I like it. I like it. I like it. People just blinded by like attractiveness. It's just like, oh, there's attractiveness or they just kind of look older. I don't know.

It's just mentioned in disbelief. It's hard to work with kids too in general. I mean, like, because I worked with, I would, you know, I respect them, I would recommend working with them. But, you know, it's, when it gets late, they get goofy, it's, you know, they haven't been in a professional setting as long. Yes, keep going.

So it is like working with us. I'm going to play this on a loop upstairs. So it takes a while to get used to it, but I think it's the same thing with like animals. There we go. So your actors look animals. I mean, if you have a big enough budget, you could do CGI animals and get them to do whatever you want, talk and dance and sing, but when you're working with real animals. Or just shut the hell out of these little eyes. I don't know what to do. Yeah, oh yeah, I guess. But it's just going to be more challenging.

And so you could take an easy way out and hire a 30-year-old, or you can, you know, depends on what kind of project you're working on. But given all that, it's pretty impressive that you shot a feature in 14 days. Yeah, that is really impressive. Oh. It's, some days were longer than others.

We made lots of messes with streamers and trying to stay just convention. And the hotel that we were filming at, they knew we were making the movie, but the whole staff didn't know we were making a movie. And at 5 in the morning, we were wrapping filming one day. The cleaning lady comes into this room. It looks like party city threw up all over it. Like, I guess it was in the hotel. And she thought she had to clean it up at 5am.

And we're like, no, no, we're here for like another two days. Don't touch it. Yeah. God, that'd be crazy to cleanly structure Seth. God. I always hear about that like an academic lane. Like somebody's working at some of the chalkboard and they come back the next day and the clean lady is wiped it away.

Like no. Let's have everyone said an old job. We had like a server room in the middle of the office. Yep. And one day I walked in and my keyboard and all my Ethernet cable was gone. And I had to look around and I found it all in the trash. I guess the clean lady had gone in and seen it and decided it was trash because it wasn't put away

and just thrown it all away. That'll show you. So from then on, I lock that door every fucking day. I don't get your solution, lock out the cleaning. Yeah, I was cleaning up your stuff. I had a... It wasn't lock out the cleaning room. Yeah, I was a clean up your stuff. I had a... It wasn't even messy, started in a hurry up. It was a keyboard sitting up and some ethernet cable.

Yeah, this one cleaning lady at my high school. I put my jacket down where we were filming something from my class and it had my phone in my pocket because you're not allowed to have your phones out at school. So I was trying to be discreet and I put it on the floor and then she said, oh, I thought it was trash and she threw it away. It's all in the security camera, but she took the iPhone and like took it home. Really? And she's like, oh yeah, it was trash, I threw it away, but then like we found the security footage

that she took it. Wow. That's crazy. That stinks. I got it back because we tracked her down. It was really intense. I'm not in high school anymore. Are we all? We should turn off our security cameras right here. My iPhone plan is suddenly going out the window. All right, so let's go back to this jackass that works at the Alamo who's not good enough for you. So this giving you free ice cream. Is it good move? Does that work? So if like young listeners are hearing this and they see a girl they like and they have the opportunity to give them free ice cream, is that a good move? I think so. All right, there you go. Unless it's care. See again, we're back to the same thing we're talking before.

Do to have nothing really to offer. Like we're not active ice cream. We don't do it. So it's like we have to be creative and give you ice cream because that's all we have. That's all we got. It's all we have going for it. Yeah, I want ice cream now. So You guys read the the Reddit AMA that we did this week, right? Oh, yeah, so in the red AMA Some guy asked me to give a shout out to some girl. He knows name Molly. He said hey my friend Molly Like you guys tonched. She's been following you since the beginning would you guys? Just give her a shout out. It would make her day. I think it was worth there something like yeah I think it was a worth there and I essentially wrote back I said okay sure

Hey Molly just so you know your friend Christian Christian which is guy who wrote the post he actually wants to date you he just doesn't know how to tell you this and he spends a lot of time thinking about you in fact he posts about you on sites like Reddit just so he can get you cool stuff like shout-outs if you if you think about it there's probably not that many people in your life who go out of the way to make you smile you should give this guy a shot seriously and of course then red it jumped on that they're like yes you know absolutely, absolutely and all this stuff. Get him out of the friend zone and all that stuff. And then she replied and said that yeah, she, she wanted to know if it was true. He said it was true and now they're going to a movie together. And all of this, we like,

I unintentionally, I didn't realize this would happen, but you know, the internet when they see something, they want to prove it's real. They have a succession with that. They want to make sure that he didn't make the second fake account. Or that I guess maybe we're not doing it maybe or something, but in either way, they They want to make sure that he didn't make the second fake account. Or maybe we're not doing it maybe or something. But either way, they just want to make sure it's real. That's so important to people on the internet. The people that they never are going to meet, they want to make sure it's real.

And so they like investigated and found their Facebooks and their Ritualty accounts and everything else. And so people have been sending me all this essentially, like not private information, but kind of that public private information now, you know, that's available. We'll certainly back to our earlier conversation. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's like they said there the people are saying me that I'm Just letting people go please, you know, let them have their fun. Let them enjoy their life But are people gonna stalk them on their first date?

We're gonna get inside. I'm gonna get streaming The entire internet is vested in this now. Well, I want to further help out Christian by now. He knows free ice cream That's the way to go free free and get with a tiny spoon Like a toothpick, but be creative that end on one side be creative about it though Like to add put a flower on top or sprinkles or sprinkles. Yeah be creative What's all you have man? Joel put a flower on it. I don't know Edible flower. This is healthy for you. I'm learning Joel's moves now

flower. This is healthy for you. I'm learning Jules moves now. Put flowers on the stomach. Jules give people free things and put flowers on it. Put a flower on a puppy on a pony. There that works. That's Jules big move. I think Jules big move actually is the 30 minutes of texting. I've got the long the long term, the long card. Yeah, exactly. So is that a problem now? Just endless texting? Yeah, it depends on the person. I don't know. It's someone you're interested in talking to, and it's not really, but I don't know.

If you're just trying, if it's just like, hey, hey, hey, hey, that's annoying. I guess. You have this and the thing. That's also annoying in person. Yeah. I think I've come full circle on texting. I used to think that texting was my preferred method

of communication. I no longer feel that way. I know. Man, I'm done. I mean, maybe like on a business level, because it's nice because people ask you question, then you respond with the question. And it's like, it's with you.

And it's not emails. You don't feel obligated, right? Two paragraphs. I feel like I have to write so much in an email to justify sending an email now But uh, Texas like one line. Where's this you get back? It's there, you know, and that's all the information you need But yeah, no, no, no like like and I even for a while I thought like texting was kind of cool because people are always say things and texts That they normally wouldn't say in person, but I've I to say, I've reached my limit on texting. I don't think it's an effective way to communicate because you don't get toned and you don't get what people are saying and people are like, if you have a real conversation with somebody, it's just not the way to work. Talk to people. I'm actually back to talking on the phone. Yeah, I'm there, man. I'm there. I'm not.

I can't. The only thing worse would be talking to someone in person. That's, well, that's that was long We're two different people man Yeah neither texting emailing or talking to the person work for me like any form of communication basically just doesn't really work I Worked to be a YouTube videos That's what's what's going on like it's so it's so different now like for you like with texting and all that stuff And it's just like that's so different from how it was I just I don't know it's so different now like for you like with texting and all that stuff and it's just like that's so different from how it was

I just I don't know it's so instant and It's like oh so and so didn't text me back the most we mad at me, but it's been like 10 minutes and It's just like instant communication all the time. It's like you've just taken the rules that it pre-existed before when people were talking and I've moved them To texting where it's like oh did they called me last now? I have to call them the other something like no rules or whatever Yeah, sometimes like I never have My phone make noise. It's always on silent. So long to turn off your vibrate you no I can leave it on vibrate, but lots of times like I'll be walking and I won't feel it vibrate I'm gonna be like hours later and I'm gonna be like oh shit. I missed that happens 500 texts

That happens me all the time. I'm glad I'm glad I don't feel my phone vibrate either and I was worried that I was dying. Yeah, I know. No, yeah, I know. The best, you know, what the best vibrating phone ever was? Sidekick, too. Yeah, you could feel I think vibrate from the next room. Well, it's also the size of a hockey puck. It was the size of a hockey puck, but man, I think it vibrate. You knew when you were getting a text or a phone call. It was like an Xbox 360 controller. It was probably stronger. Like those things that those probably stronger. By the way, 360 controller is probably the worst controller you could have to watch TV. Especially when the triggers are fast forward and rewind. I had to hold that thing like it's like picking up a baby. You know what I mean? Whenever I'm watching Hulu now. You should just get the

Lodge Tech Harmony. Yeah. I should. I don should ever use my controller for Netflix or Google anymore. The thing about the 360 controller is that it's like engineered to fall off whatever you put it on and then when it hits a ground, it's engineered for a button to get pushed somehow. You are absolutely right. Like it's just the most awkward. Like it's gonna fall over and then a button's gonna get pushed. The problem is gonna fuck it up. The problem I'm having lately is my connect hears people talking in the movie and will like pause or rewind or fast forward sometimes.

Tell you what? What? What? What? What? What? They won't even say rewind or fast forward. They'll say something and the connect interprets it as fast forward.

And then all of a sudden my movie's fast forward. Like no, Xbox, pause, pause, pause. And it doesn't hear me yelling pause. If you run and grab my controller. Dude, I can't post. Wait, I can't post. Wait, wait has a connect in his house look on his laptop here He has a sticker over his camera. Oops. Sorry. What I do? Recording here got a distance bit. He's got a stays at the top. It's gonna fall off the table and the button's gonna

Push just got duct tape over his camera lens on his lap. I used I used to connect for like really the first time this week and Man fuck that thing fuck that thing right? I mean it's impossible or whatever and uh... What do you mean it's impossible? What are you saying? I don't know maybe it's just my office like the wall it just couldn't it couldn't figure it out. You were too close. No no no I'm not even too close. You were in a tiny room. No the thing worked fine. I'm just maybe it's not the connect maybe it was just the game I was playing and it scarred me.

The reason I say fuck it is because I played like that EA active that workout game. It is embarrassing how bad that thing kicked my ass. That well here's the thing like I did it because you're out of shape. Pretty much. Yeah, fuck it. I did a workout game as well and I plugged it in. But the thing is is like if you don't do the move correctly and it doesn't interpret the move correctly, you just wind up having to do the move over again.

So if you don't play the game, make you play the game is what you're saying So if you like playing Super Mario Bros You don't make the jump it makes you do the jump again, right? It's like It's like do that the jump isn't figure it out traditionally when you're working out It's like okay, you're gonna do eight reps. Okay. I'll do it But you're playing even if your form is bad you did the eight reps but with the with the game that was playing Yeah, they do 50 reps to get the aim. I'm sorry, no sympathy here. That was bad.

No sympathy. I'll show you the tape, it's terrible. Very embarrassing. You made a, you taped yourself to me today. I recorded it, yeah. It was for a real service project. You made a, yeah, you made a video. Is that the lower crop one

that I was watching you do the other day? No, it's a Gillian Michaels fitness adventure. Oh, I thought that was lower crop. But I don't get the name wrong. Oh, sorry. I would be much better to work out with Laura Croft, probably. Yeah, probably. They did.

They dressed her like Laura Croft. Everyone thinks that. It's really weird. Don't worry about it. What's got like that temple setting? Yeah, it's just kind of weird. She's wearing like the shorts with the leather holsters and all that stuff. Yeah.

Pretty much. You know, as you do. As you do. When you're reading tunes. When you're in ink and temple. Exactly. You've ever been down to interior Mexico? reading tunes. When you're in the temple. Exactly. You've ever been down to interior Mexico? Go to the Inquien and the Aztecs stuff?

I'd love to. I've never been past the border. Let's go. You never passed the border? I've never been past the border. I've never been past the border. I've never been past the border. I've never been past the border.

I've never been past the border. I've never been past the border. I've never been past the border. I've never been past the border. I've never been past the border. I've never been past the border. I've never been past the border. I've been past the border.

I've been past the border. I've been past the border. I've been past the border. I've been past the border. I've been past the border. Oh, it's just like visiting family. Oh, yeah. But I don't want to be my exposure to Canada. Oh, my family just ride along. I was in Dallas, Texas. I was in high school. We were just like, hey, let's go to Mexico. And we're like, OK, and so we just got into the car. And we literally drove to Mexico. We drove all the way to Del Rio, Texas. Del Rio.

We went to Del Rio, Texas, right on the border. We got right to the border. We were like, let's not do this. Oh, let's. We're like 17. Well, here in Dallas, why don't you start the Louisiana? It had been a lot closer. No, we want to get a Mexico. Oh, yeah, I man I used to go to the Mexico all the time for fun. We don't do that anymore. That has changed Yeah, it seems like it. Yeah, I used to go to college all the time spring break

We'd be down there in South Padre and we just wander across the border to Madamoros and that was no big deal Was it a blast party with the skulls and the last? It was? It was a blast. Yeah, that was a lot of it. No, is it? Are we saying this right now? We're like we can't do that anymore just because we're old now and we're scared or is it truly worth it? I mean we might have been stupid and didn't realize the danger but literally the year I stopped going Actually, no, I didn't stop going. I guess I went the year after some dude got killed and eaten by a cannibalistic cult in Mexico. Yeah, I remember that. I remember that. Yeah, that's the way to do it, man. Yeah, but I mean, you just got worse and worse Like my dad would split time in the interview. He lived on Lake Chapala, which is interior of Mexico

And he kept wanting me come down there and bring the kids and I was like, I just can't convince My wife to a did he did he've run any problems with that with a property or anything like that or like they just rented they never know yeah i don't it's weird don't don't i think you like ninety nine year leases from the next government i don't think you buy property uh... i think that used to be the case that may be different now i don't know it's been a i i remember it changing fairly recently taboos carry thing a second here though but i said that my dad said i just can't convince my wife uh... jordan just can't convince my wife Jordan.

I can't convince her to let me bring the kids down there and he goes, well, that's ridiculous. Why not? And I said, well, because I'll collect that. That's what's my dad, my pressure on my dad, yeah. And so, he said, he said, why not? And I said, well, she's worried about getting, you know, getting kidnapped or meeting abducted, you know, eating, while I'm down there, just kidnapped, because it's like an industry kidnapping in central America

they think they are earnings last year by the way and he had to find in the first mix with North America my dad's response that was because oh that's ridiculous he goes I've lived here for four years and I only know one person who's been kidnapped I don't know anybody who's been kidnapped ever and now I know somebody by proxy because you live in Mexico. That is weird. Yeah, I've got my whole life, not anyway. And like on the news, this week it was like watching ESPN,

it was like, catcher was kidnapped. It's like some major league catcher was kidnapped. Oh yeah. And it's like, oh, he's been his way, Alan. And then everyone's like, oh, he's been his way, Alan. Now he understand it. I don't know why we understand that. I wasn't some other baseball player stabbed in the Netherlands look over the weekend stabbed and killed stabbed

in the Netherlands. Yeah. I don't I'm there was somewhere in Europe and I want to say it was in the Netherlands that some major player was literally in a rough place honestly. It wasn't where the cartoonist was killed too. Well that was the Muslim thing, right? It was slowly still getting killed. I mean, yeah, but I mean, so another baseball player was in that one's got stabbed. Yes But we don't know any more than that. All I read was the headline because I don't care beyond that So I read two crazy stats last week. I read one from the New York Times that said 26% of people aged 25 to 34 are unemployed. 24 to 35 is a major age demographic. That is the post college years.

26% of those people are unemployed. And then I read, and I can't find it, but there's a ridiculous amount of people in Mexico that it's, I wanna say it's like seven million young people that are neither studying nor are they working. They're just like essentially an entire population of roving packs of miscreants essentially and it's getting to be a bigger and bigger problem. Why do you have packs? Because they're minorities. What's that? Why do they pack? Just because they're minorities. I don't want people to think they're

seven million people or even across all of the... It's gonna be a map of the dust storm seven point six million people it's a very big amount of the unemployment Spain's like twenty percent and it's like the end of the end of the unemployment

rate it's really a lot worse than that because it's just measuring people who are on unemployment but eventually they a lot of them go through that process don't they let's all unemployment groups people who are looking for work

exactly right right a lot of people who like yeah out of. So it's even worse than that. But it's like, I don't know. We're looking at old statistics and applying in the new situations. Mm-hmm. No. I don't know. I think your 7.0.000 number was was on the spot. I read that article as well. Bam! All right. Good. So, scary still. It's gonna be more. I know a guy. I know a guy who's a lot like Joel and his name is also sorry for you Joel Yeah, I know I get it everywhere I go like like every time a bank fails

He's like yes, he's like by gold by gold and he's also think too is You know as years go on put as much put as many states between you and Mexico as you can You see that's a big thing he thinks it's's a community to be a bigger and bigger problem, you know, with drugs and everything else. You look at what's been going on and I mean, it's been right. It's a lot of portion of it. I only hear about that kind of stuff,

like when I hear about those assholes in Arizona who patrol the border. The violence in Mexico is pretty bad, but there was a study recently that proved the violence did not spill over the United States nearly as much as people claim. It's a lot of scare tactics. The climb levels are pretty steady or dropping on the American side, but it's really bad

in Mexico. That's it, and then too, is violent current in general? In the US, it's way way down. Yeah. Well, here's the other thing. I would probably be more likely to go to Mexico if we if I took a plane You know, I went from one city to another city, but I don't think I would drive Mm-hmm through Mexico basically was saying she would fly over the border. Yeah, I think so right. Yeah, I mean

Didn't Jack recently go to Mexico or whatever? Say he went to Cancun. Yeah, so I would mind going there although it's like I'm actually more scared of the water than anything else Probably scared of water because I hear to many like he went there and they got like Sicker whatever. Oh, you mean the beach. I thought you made up swimming Oh, that's getting ready for a great story. There's unemployed sharks Pass you up right okay go to a decent resort. They should have safe water You know I don't give a shit about that stuff. That doesn't scare me at all. Like you never get sick probably.

Yeah, you know, you know, you know, well, let's get Michael in here. Michael Ragequit does this thing too, which I admire where he'll put a sandwich down and he'll pick it up the next day and start eating it. Well, I'm just going to wait, wait, wait, wait, you admire that. You just said you admire someone who puts food on the floor and then eats at the next day. We poor babies about that. I don't know if it was that one. We need a need to get a doctor on here on the podcast just have them No, by the whole time that's how for you Did they caveman get point was out he has what's that would you ask so they came to caveman get food boys I'm sure they did and when they did they probably died of what you've never gotten food points see that's so

No, it's not so fucking annoying I'm gonna someone with a spear with a rock on the end we need to give you some we need to like this is what we need to do we need to like a jar of salmonella and then to see we put that on though alright I got Michael in here hey pull up a chair and join us so here's what I'm talking about Michael sorry aka Michael rage quit

I was talking to them about this I admire hello is that you will buy like say for instance a chick-to-lay sandwich You'll buy two of them. Yeah, and you'll leave one at your desk and you'll come in the next day and then you'll just eat it Yes, I want you to know he's saying he's saying he admires that he admired you I went through that I did that when I was in college and when I was a sage I did that for a long time until something was wrong You don't do it anymore. Have you ever gotten sick? No, yeah You died you liar Remember that one day you came in you ate the you ever gotten sick? No, I don't. You died, you liar. You're different.

Remember that one day you came in, you ate the kiss of the knee, and you're like, I shouldn't have eaten that. I don't feel so good in your hand. You're not sure. That's true, that was while I was eating it. But I mean, I mean, you cannot lie and say you didn't know. I know, I know. But you're the thing.

Here's the thing, I wasn't like I was sick about it for days. It was like, you know, I flushed it out, and I'm good to go. See, I was working with a kiss of the knee. I believe in you. I don't think you've really got sick. It's like, once you really, really get sick, then it's like, oh, I was working with more of this idea. I believe him. Come on. I don't think he really got sick. It's like, once you really, really get sick, then it's like, oh, I remember what that's like.

That's suffocating. Yeah. See, and that's the other two is like. We're just gonna keep feeding you stuff. People always keep eating it. People always forget about like, dates on meat too. That's what cooking is. If you cook it, you kill all that shit.

In fact, I hate to break this to you. What do you think? Dates on meat? Yeah, like if it's like five days past the date. Uh-huh. Come on. Just cook it. Fuck that.

That's the point. Bite it. That's what cavemen figured out. They found a dead deer and they cooked it. And then also lived to like 30 years. And then they died. But those were 40 good years. 30 good years, dude.

30 good years. I'm texting. That's more than anybody could ask. They were etching stones to the girls they liked. But I'm seriously, it's like if me and you grab it and you cook it it should be fine and if you go I This is why I don't know if you ever noticed I never eat anything burning cooks good free I don't know if you've ever noticed and nothing when you go no That's like the danger zone for me. I was hate when we cook too

It's like and people who have like food handling courses, you know from when they work at a restaurant or whatever They're always so bitchy and complaining about like when you touch chicken And when you didn't touch the chicken We gotta raise the stakes here. I mean we gotta raise the stakes We start seeing put more dangerous stuff and see do it like yeah Let me say so when you go to one of your fancy steak restaurants like when you do jackasses go to conventions And you always end up eating at some hundred dollar of play place. Delicious steaks. Just what is that? Why do you punish us for sending you out of town to an event?

Why do you have to ask? Yes. You sending me out of town to an event? So I'm publishing you. So you nailed it. He's like, if I have to send a fucking week in sendy-a-go, you're going to pay for a fucking dinner. No shit.

Gus is finding a really great thing. It's his trend where let's say we're going to Pax or we go to San Diego. It's you're in a place where there's potentially in San Diego a hundred thousand people. Yeah, a hundred and twenty to a hundred forty thousand. So what Gus has figured out if you eat at the most expensive restaurant, then you can immediately go in and sit down because nobody goes to the most expensive restaurants. Brilliant! It's time saving you. You're ingenious! You can wait two hours in line at the subway or you can get a hundred dollar stake. It's because everyone's tapped out from buying the five hundred dollar Iron Man replica helmet or whatever. So they can't afford to

go to prime stake house or what the fuck do you go or like it's a write-off. What is it? No boo or whatever? I did not eat it no boob But then it was fucking funny that when you're a comic-con. Yeah, there was no one in no boo and all the waiters were just standing at the window looking out at the All the huge crowds of people and it was not a fucking person in the restaurant Like everywhere we go across the country. It's the same fucking store It's like just like yeah no tipping and no like they just they spent all their money The restaurants are not going to see anything. I'm not trying to say it's a negative thing. I'm glad that people come to Comic Con.

And by stealth. And have no money when they walk out. Yes, I wish I could grab everyone by the ankles and shake their mouth. Shake their mouth. Let me take a connection. But when you go to those stakeholders, if you see aged meat on our stature age, dry dry age or wet aged that means they basically leave it out on the floor Exactly that's what they did you're eating up to like 20 30 days. They're leaving the I'm only leaving it there for like two right, but then they cook it. They don't leave a fucking cooked chick filet

I'm not arguing. It's different fucking arguments. It's two different arguments. Okay, come down Something that's been cooked and left out versus something that's not cooked enough I think you eat what you want to eat out. I want to eat. You want a completely angry point. You know, Bernie just looks to fight animals and then eat them. I think you want to fight them. Leave them out for a couple of weeks on the savanna and then eat them.

That's an excellent point. I'm not afraid of animal at any point. I'm afraid of dead or alive. I'm not afraid. I'm afraid of anime, any point. Dead or alive, I'm not afraid. On Sunday, Lindsey and I wanted to get the pumpkin pie, McDonald's, because it's seasonal, and they have it. That sounds awesome, by the way. It's like one of those fried pies, I don't know.

I didn't have it. She had it the other day without me, and I threatened to hit her again. I mean, hit her if she went without me. Okay, okay. Oh, you threatened to hit her if she went without you. Okay, that's cool, man. That's totally fine. Yeah, so. Things were a bit of went without you. Okay, that's cool. That's totally fine. Yeah, so

Yeah, so She didn't remember the McDonald's she went to so she looked it up on her phone She didn't remember yeah, so we ended up going to Walmart just to go to McDonald's in Walmart And I was like we are like the classiest people here, so we went the dollar. Michael was the last time you texted Lindsay. Last time you texted her? I don't know. Yesterday. Would you say to her? That little finished a story.

I don't know exactly what it was. It's probably like, hey, what's up? You can't look at those words. You want to finish this thing? No idea. I'm for free that was. Emily has this look of triumph on her face. So we get there, they have the fucking pumpkin pie,

but we're like, oh, fuck it, we're already at Walmart. It was a bi-prunk and pile Walmart. So we bought pumpkin pie and cherry pie, but the point is that McDonald's, I woke up Monday morning and there was like eight nuggets left that sat on the counter all night, and I ate spoonfuls of cherry pie and old nuggets for breakfast.

And you're fine. And here I am. Look at you. Hold day later, that was my breakfast yesterday. It's a miracle. Performing is do you see it? No, it's not a big difference. That's the science.

When I got food poisoning, that's what I got food poisoning from. It was from chicken nuggets. For the last food establishment. I got food poisoning for chicken nuggets. Where the nuggets are muk nuggets. It was the worst thing that had, I mean, it was like two weeks of sheer agony. Have you ever seen it?

It was a winery day. I went out, we bought the nuggets. It was snowing like crazy. No, no. Ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha. You remember, for those people in the Northeast, you know what, it snows a lot?

And then like you get the, like the, the snow plows, like pile up big giant snow banks. Like, so I'm going down the thing here. This is going to, keep going, come on, yeah, wait, this giant four by four truck. And so we were like, this is what we're going to do. We're going to go buy chicken nuggets, and then we're going to go to the school parking lot, and we're going to jump the four by fourfour off of the giant pile hill because like the snowblows Trump's like the chicken nuggets are important so we Chicken nuggets are integral to that plan

You know if you will for the truck that for yourself This is the story is to like I was going to someone else. No, no, go go go You know the the the giant piles of snow. Yes You know when you see the Toyota commercial and the 4x4 like goes through the thing, the poofy fluffy snow and the poofy fluffy snow goes everywhere, right? We were thinking that's what was gonna happen.

We're gonna drive this 4x4 through the giant puffy fluffy snow into everywhere. We're back to truck up, we started driving on the parking lot and we hit that thing and that motherfucker was rock fucking hard. And then we went and said through it, we went up the thing and then jumped into the air Wow, I wasn't wearing a seatbelt and I remember being the sunroof was open

I remember being out of the sunroof looking down and there were chicken nuggets everywhere And then later I ate the chicken nuggets and then got food poisoning Did you get ejected from the truck? Or you got like a halfway ejected. Wow. And survived the accident to eat the chicken nuggets to get food poisoning. I'm gonna go out on limb here. You're working from a cause and effect mentality.

You had a concussion and you threw up from having a concussion and you blamed it on the chicken nuggets because you ate chicken nuggets. Did he look as if he got out the sunroof, he probably didn't hit his head. Okay, everybody out in the world who has gotten food poisoning knows that it was food poisoning. Well, look at that dude, that's too pretty quick. Have you not

noticed that too that there are a lot of people who get food poisoning all the time? Like that happens to some people like they get food poisoning like twice a year, three times a year. How's it possible? I've never had food poisoning and rage quits never had both Like once Right, how have you ever had food was a couple times a couple times Emily you had once yeah That's not I'm free ice cream Me too before yeah, oh don't you dare you disparage? I I Vomited so violently You know you can tell it

I contain my name the Salt Lake sponsor this podcast. We wouldn't have to tell these stories. I know the story I have to leave all I vomited so violent That a whole beast I felt it come out and it started out of the pain and scouring. And see the thing was, it was the most pleasant vomit experience I've ever had, because there was so much barbecue sauce that the bathroom smell like barbecue sauce afterwards. And the toilet was just like a super mess, a partially digested sandwich. I brought the juice of A couple of those guys.

Oh, god. That was awful. But, like I said, what's it was done? I was like, it smells really good. You can't stop it. Stop it. Stop it. See, I don't give food boys whatever he does about it.

I have a horrible gag reflex. It's an awful, awful gag reflex. So even in visioning that. It just makes me, but it's funny because like you said, when you know, you're not all right. All right, Michael. Would you have eaten that bean? Stop it, stop it. It's a hypothetical. But the beat of it, metaphorically speaking, would you have eaten that thing? That's possible. And As though the camera. Oh my god. Blah, blah. So tell us more anymore.

You think about the anatomy of like the head and stuff, like the root it had to travel for that time. Not only up, but down as well. It had to have been like a gunshot probably. Like a pop gun or something, you know? That's awful. Okay, look, look, it's break away. What do you know on its way? I don't want to judge what other people are doing in their lives.

Like Mr. Concussion chicken nuggets over here. But maybe you got sick because you're eating so fast you're swapping your beans all. I mean, slow the fuck down. You should be playing it. If you're gonna criticize me, I'm going to more detail about it. Mr. Dag over here.

So can you, let me ask you a question. I guess you, I saw you eat barbecue the other day. So it doesn't affect, you thought it was good the moment it was out of here. Yeah Fuck this. I'm it. Stop it. I had like I the first time I got sick off of alcohol It was a orange Julius mad dog 2020. That sounds awesome and boy. I got so sick It was like what's like an orange mad dog. Oh God. Yeah, that's what it was It's like I couldn't I couldn't I still to this day cannot touch orange Julius, my adult 20. Well, luckily you know, I don't think you can touch me.

Who orange Julius anywhere anymore? Is that place still around? You know, mad dog is something you no longer drink when you turn 17, right? Or you also get your first part time job. I have more than $3 now. I can bump it up to the next level. I don't need to drink nail polish. That's just been repackaged.

Oh, God, that stuff was horrible. Yeah, that in Boone's farm. God, that was like the standard go to when I was growing up in Houston. Oh, that's just been repackaged. Oh god, that stuff was horrible. Yeah, that in Boone's farm. God, that was like the standard go-to when I was growing up in Houston. Oh, it's just terrible stuff. What were we thinking? We weren't. That stuff was, yeah. Where are they drinking now?

Yeah. What are you guys drinking? They don't even, they don't even make cool drinks. Wait, how are they doing? Yeah, they do. I think I see them. Michael's old, no. When was the last time you saw a wine cooler?

I think I see him would be now ending in the grocery store bullshit. Yeah, like Bartles and James the last time I see a wine cooler was the last time I was around probably a frag doll That would be appropriate that was me to see I'm gonna look at the wine coolers I think Michael you just drink like lone star and cheap beer The lone star and course light and corona any beer that's been left open in out for a few days? No, that I won't drink. That's a no-no. But anything else, anything that's free,

anything that's being served? We had that big read through for season 10, which I should now that I've mentioned, I can send you the picture of the read through that we did for the LinkedIn. But part of that was we filled the fridge with beer and just had a really great time with all the actors who were in town.

We even got a photo booth here where people can jump in that was a lot of fun Yeah, do we ever I guess we never digitize it? I know we have them all digitized around the server I want to say if you say you're gonna send me to the link don't please send it I got a lot of trouble for not sending for not posting the sleeping picture of us less But I posted them and in fact look at I'm doing here. I'm actually sending you link so already I'll look at that. They're waiting for you as I talk about stuff. That's all. That's why efficient. Look at me.

Damn, do you have a picture of the bean? No, stop it. Maybe, yeah, again. But we had a bunch of beers. So people, you know, we have a party. There's always like those half or only quarter drunk beers that are like laying around. And so then you start dumping them out the sink.

The next day after a party, that flat beer smell, that's a stable old beer smell. That is the worst smell in the world that doesn't matter I feel like you you even once you get rid of the beer the smell still there like you cannot get rid of that smell for a few days it's like the smell of beer has never bothered me old beer stay like it's a different smell it doesn't matter no it's like a smell of a house having a thing over I think the drink so much beer that when you'd like you're an eight it sort of smells like no no just gross does your body not work what the hell you just pass I'm just gonna take the alcohol part move on the rest on I have though I have woken up like there was a point when I was it was in when we went to Australia

we I had to catch like a 6 a.m. flight to New Zealand I somehow man when I book travel I think I'm way cooler than I am like oh a 6 a.m. Flight to New Zealand. I somehow man when I book travel I think I'm way cooler than I am like oh a 6 a.m. Flight that's nobody deal Well, guess what? Australia New Zealand is international So I'm gonna show up two hours early. That's 4 a.m. I mean We have to leave the hotel at 3 a.m. You know what this thing you sent me that flight information Yeah, and I was like what the fuck and it's like I looked and couldn't I could not find any flight It was not a 6 a.m. flight. I don't know what the story is there.

Where it was, I don't know what it was. I was gonna say it or overnight. Yeah, I was just, I don't know what, why that is, but there was no get around that. Yeah, anyway, so I just hated myself so much. So I, I, that was one of the things where I came home. In Melbourne, it came home, went to back to the hotel. And then I had to be up at three,

so I thought, oh, see for an hour. And I'm pretty sure, I think, when you wake up and you're still drunk. Not, I'm not like hammered but not like Brandon was but I woke up And I was still have to think of waking up drunk. That's I don't know You and I did that the first key oh that we went to when we stayed at the Syrian able hotel. Oh god We had a super early flight the same thing went to be at the airport before dawn We got back to the hotel room like at three in the morning like We were like, let's just not sleep. Oh, look, there's a couple of beers here. Let's just drink the beers.

Why did you try that? Yeah, well, and London, the drinking age is 18. And so this first time I ever drank anything, and then my flight, I had to like get up at four. And I just like fell asleep involuntarily, like at the airport, like waiting for my flight and stuff. And I just had no idea. I like be holding a book and wake up like two hours later.

It was really scary. Did you miss your flight or did you get on? No, I got it. The announcement was rolling, but is the only time I'd ever done this? Do you see that Best White commercial? Is it based on you? Yes. So with that, you guys see that commercial? No. It's totally a commercial that's utterly based on Emily. Really?

It's just like, I'm some girl. I'm doing the zombie movie. It's like, wow, this is totally Emily. Really? I haven't seen that. Your first couple of movies were horror movies. I'm some girl. I'm doing the zombie movie. It's like wow, this is totally Emily really I'm taking your your first couple of movies or horror movies and then yeah, she's making a zombie movie She's like oh my god my home video camera my parents are gonna help me and it's gonna be great. That's interesting Yeah, I can't question today approach you about that no, but I got a lot of tweets about it I'm like oh it can't be that close. I saw it on TV and it was like that's a little close It's kind of like the whole kitty wood close and I thought on TV and it was like that's a little close. It's kind of like the whole kitty wood controversy. Yeah. Right now. You know what's going on with why would there?

So we could Michael loose. Yeah, Michael. Thank you Michael. Go go eat a nacho that's been sitting around for two or twenty hours or something. You're like Michael's really bad at high five. Dude, I'm a pro at high five. You just came at me. I didn't know what your game plan was. I just came at you. Really bad at high five. Make some preparation pro at high five, but you just came at me. I didn't know what your game plan was. I just came at you. Really bad high five. Next time, preparation for the high five. Thanks, Michael. Yeah, so I was in this short for a local director

in Joe Nicolosi. Thanks, Michael. And it was called Kittywood. And it was a spoof about the made up fictional studio that makes all the cat videos for the internet. And so I played like the Steve Jobs slash Mark Zuckerberg character who was like the CEO guru of this company. I think John Earler's in it, he plays Agent North and Rivers Blue and some other local actors are in it. It was fun to go and just, I had no other responsibilities other than just to act in it.

And that was fun. That was about four months ago. And it did pretty well. I think I had like 600,000 views or something like that. And then just last week some Canadian ad agency put out catvertising, which was advertising agency that makes all the cat videos for the internet and essentially the same video. And so because it wasn't our video I felt more compelled like, oh I can fucking ray along this as being a copycat, you know what I mean? So copycat? So I, so I was like I retweeted something John Erler posted on Twitter and something like that

Like what's it? Our stuff. I just I don't like to call that kind of stuff out because you never know we make so much stuff here Too, I'm sure somebody could find something we make that similar to some other video. You know all the videos we make So be careful about that But it's one of the things to where people will sometimes call you on something like like oh, this is just this thing You guys made just like don't so but then when it's you it's like they're like oh shut up you know it's like they're not even close to similar it's like two videos of my cats you know advertising agencies making cat videos exact same thing they think beat for beat it's almost the same thing like no shut up so it just goes to show it's like you think all that stuff is important but nobody at the bottom line nobody

cares nobody nobody cares at all yeah it's true the argument I made last time about that is like sometimes we'll have some guy Three back in my face when I talked about this before where he said we're buries Even said before that they go to make a video and they look it up online and somebody's already made that video Like that's how fast things move online. He says they do that. It's like yeah, you jackass so we don't make the video That's that's our solution to that. It's like when we find out the video's already been made or somebody's got a similar idea we don't we don't spend our time making that video and making another one just like it even though we could do it and you know probably just fine and nobody would give a

shit that's why we stop doing that stuff so you anonymous person who worked me year and a half go fuck you you've got sir podcast style yeah the negativity man you can sort of that stuff sometimes. You really can I love it I love it. I love reading it, but I know you do I know Michael also loves reading it So Gus I posted on the front page This is a chat that I have with Brandon when he got drunk in Melbourne. I would just want to read to you What he wrote to me? I it was this is a 12 30 is this 12 30 p.m. Oh? You worked on this podcast. He described his side of this but we haven't we haven't seen the text yet

We haven't heard the text yet. Well, so I wrote him and I said he was at a fan event and then I went out to meet some friends I have in Australia and so he stayed there and Joel where'd you go? I know you want with me. I love you. Yeah, you want with me. I must have made it. Yeah, and so I just texted him and I said Hey, it's like 12 30 nights said are you still out and Brenner replies I'm gonna should have read this verbatim. Yeah spelled no H. Yeah, looking for cab back They G New text it me so many drinks need to get back on this to our up New text just a letter I that's it. So what we're saying is and this will put you line breaks as well

Yeah, and I wrote what we're saying is if you're a guy and you need to send a text message to a girl That's what you said exactly That that's the smooth move so I said hey take a cab to me I'm at the bar to sit the bar where we're in he says I'm just trying to get to the hotel That's my other place trying Like trying and that was it for the rest of the night I never heard that's typical go Bernie typical Bernie where Brandon's like oh god My liver I'm dying. I'm filled with so much beer and Bernie responses. Yeah come come over come over who we're here

I was gonna take care of reading dead animals like feed him drinks and make him eat old chicken nuggets or anything Who knows Brandon is more susceptible to experimentation and torture? Well, you know, it's important to discover learn things You're gonna have like the limits of a human body tolerance for electricity I almost almost remember that New Zealand almost I was also fucking bringing on stop on the trip because Everything was electrified. No, well, I was like, you know He was so excited because he never traveled internationally and you know this this come back I mean we go to New Zealand and we meet Peter Jackson

He's like the national treasure of New Zealand and like Brandon's first trip to New Zealand he gets to meet Peter Jackson. So he was having a great time and he's had a lot of fun and when we even flew to Austin to excuse me to LA I thought this would be kind of cool. I'll upgrade him to first class and use some miles that I have and I'll upgrade Brandon to first class. So we did that. He was so fucking excited and then he found out he goes are these drinks free? And I said yeah, they're free. And he goes Oh my god, so he was like ordering two drinks at a time And so that I started all right, we're gonna go all the way with this I said so listen whenever you want to drink just hit the button. That's what that's for oh my god

I don't love this anymore and he goes and he goes and he has walled out because he was willing to pay and he started to put his wallet away and I go don't put your wallet away because the drink is your free I know you still have to skip the flight attendance and he goes oh really I go yeah and they're gonna act like please don't do that I you know I can't accept it but that's just what they do and say with this anyone who's traveled never try to tip a flight attendant they will throw you off the fucking plane at 35,000 feet if you try to tip them. Why is that, Gus? They're not waiters. I mean, that's, you're essentially calling them a waiter, but they're not, I mean, that's an auxiliary function

of what they do is to give you a drink if you ask for it. They're more like safety personnel. Yeah, I've noticed that they're just angry. Period. They're just angry. We're good to do with the jack, I've noticed that they're just angry Period, they're just angry. We're good to do what the jackass is on a plane. You'd be angry too. I guess so I You can't get this point you can't get along with flight attendants. I'm not saying I'm saying I can't get along with flight attendants I just say they're angry. I disagree. I think it's if you if you get if you're in the first class There's less angry and they hide it better No, I very rarely do anger You guys are very annoying then, but I don't think it's I don't think it's that common

The normal okay, you just got a smile would be nice. The only the only really flight is a they I like Vegas They're happy on that one all the rest of the material I think you have fun with the flight attendants you can't fuck around you know a little bit and let them know you fly I didn't give you like the three little bottles of boost Yeah, once you know how if they if they know you know how the system works right then everything's good yeah especially if like you change seats you know like give a shit forget screw cares yeah and they like come and they give you the little bottle of vodka because that makes that makes all the flights way better yeah that's a little bottle of

the yellow that's you get the free little bottles of vodka on American For the record that kid has been my friend for like 10 years. It wasn't like a How do you feel that you this is This is now for this opportunity to go ahead make a reddit post about this so Emily Oh, yeah, I'm going to kid out really like you and Probably wants to date and has gone to a lot of trouble to give you free ice cream Look so Emily the guy saw me. I look like a dude who likes free ice cream I was no offer free ice cream right you see me sitting chair like that dude likes free ice cream too nope I didn't get anything awkward yeah well you know he doesn't like you well miles was there and carry was there too

did they get free ice cream nope oh carry looks like a girl not give get free ice cream? Nope. Oh, Kerry looks like a girl. How could you not give Kerry free ice cream? I have to fight the years to give Kerry free ice cream, just seeing him at the day. I don't know how that is. There was another thing I want to talk about, since I don't want to talk about Australia and New Zealand anymore. Okay. And there was a cool trend that we noticed in Australia. Where we were in Melbourne, there was a convention center, it was right next to a casino. Well, in a casino, there's lots of cool restaurants too. So we sat in this one restaurant. We had a waitress one day.

Joel, how old do you think she was? She was probably about 25. And she had, I'm really bad with this game. She had silver hair. Like she had full gray hair. I'm not talking just like a gray streak or anything like that. She had gray hair. Mm-hmm.

And it was really cool. And then I noticed that several other girls that we saw had gray hair. Was it dyed or had they all seen something horrible? I don't know. Maybe they didn't see something terrible. But like a great white shark. One of those octopuses that paralyzes you for 24 hours. Did I ever tell you about that? No. Oh my god. It's a real thing. You should eat that. So, anyway, I thought that was really cool So I don't know if that's a trend and it's making its way here, but I gotta say if you like that's a no I thought that was a really cool look we talked about it. I I have no memory

Joel was really drunk. I guess so I really don't the girl was over here I thought I remember the girl part of the equation. I just don't remember her having gray hair You never got that high It was only that day when we were like we went to lunch at like 11 30 and nothing opened until 12 15s we wandered. Right for a while. I remember her. Yeah. She was cool. Yeah. She was like, oh bring the armor guys over here. Right. That guy. That girl. It's funny when you deal with the periphery. It's just like, it's just like, everything about this girl, but you don't remember the fact that she had silver hair. I don't remember that. Which is really crazy for Joel because one thing I've noticed about Joel

If you're a woman and you want to know the one thing about you that makes you unattractive like your scarlet Johansson and you're one of the most beautiful people on the planet But there's just one thing about you that would make you unattractive just talk to Joel Heyman because Joel Heyman will pick that one Fucking thing and go no the distance between her tip of her nose and your top of his too far It's literally that kind of stuff. I learned what a friend of me is from the job I am insane you are I am insane I wrote micro split I will micro split and micro split and micro split I will just you know that words and then perform those words that are what I mean yeah a friend you know is not the word

you use the friend you know that's the dip in your nose the small fold of tissue tears or restricts the motion of a mobile organ but I'm very dysfunctional Yeah, we know that. Yeah, a friend Yolom is another word you use. We're a friend Yolom, it's the dip in your nose, the small fold of tissue, here's a restricts the motion of a mobile orphan. I'm very dysfunctional. You are, do you turn that level of scrutiny on yourself? Yes. You do? That's gotta be horrific.

Have you seen the pictures that we did? Yeah. So the thing? Yeah, terrible. I didn't look at yours. God, they're fucking awful. No, yours were bad. They were terrible.

We're fucking awful. I'm such an artist, I stay on the looked at mine. I was like, yes, these are all excellent. I don't look at mine. Pick a favorite. Whatever. What can we make a collage? She's making a collage. You can just use the poster or whatever. The picture ended up picking had the end of the poster in it. That we're I've noticed that with a theme video you're trying to use as many images of you in the image. Yes. that's weird. Yes. Yeah It's all coming full circle. It's like some sort of subconscious thing going on with you. It's not subconscious at all at all We'll for the viewer. Yeah

So it's it's branding the Gus brand It's branding. I hate that term branding. Yeah, I do. I really do I'm just ironic because we just went through a rebrand on the Rich Chief Podcast. Hey, still no pizza though. What's that? Still no pizza though. What does that mean? The the rebranding. Why did we rebrand?

Oh, we don't have pizza. I see what you're saying because we made fun. We said, oh, I see. So we have made our pizza money yet. Yeah. It's coming soon, dude. We're scratching and saving pizza for days. We're not going to leave it out and Michael could eat it like a week later.

And so much pizza. I really do feel like we need to push this. We need to sort adding, if we need to sort adding things to raise the stakes in eating food stuff for you, Michael. Let's find that point. I really don't know what you would have to do to food that I wouldn't eat it. Didn't you guys ever grow up like the God-made dirt, so dirt don't hurt? That's kind of thing. No.'t eat it. Didn't you guys ever grow up like the god-made dirt, so dirt don't hurt? That's kind of thing.

No. No. No. Five-second rule. Like if you drop something on the ground, will you not eat it? I burn it. I kind of depend upon the group. I'm mostly no, but I mean-

It's not like a men's bathroom and a gas station. Like we also, what are you eating all of- What are you eating food? Just anywhere you eat food. Like in a kitchen. If you drop food in the kitchen. No. Everyone in this office is fucking filthy.

If anything touches the floor here mm-hmm seriously, yeah Really I find that interesting No, I mean it is pretty it's essentially like dropping food onto the bottom of people's shoes Whatever you're gonna say it's not like that. It's a bad thing too because once you once you fixate on something Or you look at it then it's game over because like what's start connecting the vibe? You know, they're like we work in office where there's no toilet paper ever. So how do you say that? There's no toilet paper in our office. Garbage pile up on top of garbage. Can't get the thing. With the pictures, we put them up all the time. That's what the people want wrong. Yeah, we mean exactly lazy fucking

people. Like I posted that picture today where they took five pizza boxes. I now know I know I know I now know why the term the term you know zombie plan originated from us because No question that virus is gonna break out from Like they're we're gonna be the ones Be here. I saw Chris trembling around earlier this morning look kind of suspicious You know because we don't have toilet paper This in this last episode of Walking Dead they did a flashback at the beginning of it to I just was a previous week's episode flashback to like when they were napalm dropping on the cities.

Like before, because the show starts after the apocalypse essentially. So they flashback to when it was going on, like when people are trying to escape the cities. And it is, it's like, at one point if that was happening, at one point you would you accept it. Like, Emily, you were talking about this, like you get nervous when you see a guy shambling slowly right? I like pick up my person like get ready to go. So you're getting ready to haul ass? Is that what you're gonna do? Yeah I get my key out for my car think about how many water bottles are in there. Well I need to go. Well Brandon has said his zombie plan is just to give up. And to get to become a zombie. Yeah just to

come to it. It is an interesting idea. It's like crowd-genic storage. It's like let's become a zombie and then maybe whenever they find it cure for it I'll be around one of the women who works at our DVD distributor Said that that's her plan as well and she has a list of people she's gonna eat really yeah She has like she thought this out like she wants to come Everybody's like remember remember when you cross over you'll I remember a random people to go after Is it like personal people or like no personal people top five people she Control once you've become the zombie like be able to distract. I don't know if that's part of the She's ready in case that is yeah, it comes true. Yeah, it's better to be prepared either way It's like it is a real

Zombie plan that it's not planned when you're a zombie like they had the Star Trek documentary where it's like, look at the real technology is we've invented from like fake sci-fi stuff. And it's almost like the zombie thing is it's like, we've almost created a narrative that's so interesting when we just have to figure out a way to make it happen. Yeah, I mean, it's like, if you prepare, you prepare, you prepare, you prepare, well now you just have to make it happen

because you spent so much time preparing for it. So we're gonna have to figure out a way. So we're gonna have to put a virus to you know, to paint this off. Otherwise the joke is not funny. Or the joke got much funnier. The joke is much funnier if it actually happened. Thank God you're not in charge of our nuclear weapons. Somebody's out there. Somebody's out there with a sense of humor and a good degree. Who's supported? Ducking cover. If no one fires a missile. That's right. I'm going to go make shelter for it. We've wasted all this time. We've wasted all this time. We've wasted all this time.

Let's pull the trigger on this. This is going to happen. It's banging the table. Come on. Somebody hit the work. Okay, let me pose this question to you, Gus. Would you rather a nuclear war happen or a zombie apocalypse? Who wouldn't want the zombie apocalypse?

I would not. Versus a nuclear war? Can nuclear war, nuclear war, shums. You almost made me miss for nothing. Jackass. Nuclear war? I, nuclear war, nuclear war sounds, you almost made me miss for not the jackass. Nuclear? Yeah, nuclear war, I think, that would be the worst. But yeah, of course, it's limited. Like it's limited, like they just hit the major population

centers, of which awesome would be one. Well, if we're at ground zero, it's pretty much, hey, I'm live. I am dead. I've ever seen versus a website that allows you to overlay on Google Maps the yield of various nuclear devices yep and shows what the blast radius would be as well as the fallout range and then you can like wind as well and show where the fallout will go there there is not an atomic warhead small enough to not wipe out

everyone off Austin's not big enough no they're more we're toast most of most of them are Would not I mean wasn't would destroy downtown, but like where we are down here would be okay with a small nuclear head at the Capitol Yeah, what do you mean small? Like a missile with one a small missile with one warhead North Korea. Oh, we can't we be fucked I'm making a four mile crater. I mean no, no, right? Well, no, I mean you have got like the blast zone which inside of that is like, oh, you're vaporized.

Then outside of that, it's like, oh yeah, you get to live for like an hour. No, this map shows you, like, this is the range of what your eardrums are burst. This is the range of what you're... I would rather be downtown than we're in the, ah, you're really fucked and get to feel it for two hours before you die zone, that's us.

No, I don't think so. It the on the warhead, but for most I think we'd be okay down here What do you mean okay? Did you know the most I mean best case scenario if you're like if you're 50 miles out It's like yeah, I get cancer. Yeah, I wrote in a few years I don't know man. I don't know. I mean like maybe we're round rock then then we're okay. You think round rock Is that much further away than we are from downtown? Isn't it? You guys getting real specific about local jager. No, no, I'm saying like You weren't we're splitting here. It's a zombie conversation. It's a nightmare. We're splitting here. This podcast is really interesting to someone How far away we from downtown for how would you say four miles?

For a mile five year. Yeah, five six months. No, we're like we're we're closer to 10. I say 10 month. We're 10 miles away on 35 How far away were we from downtown? Four miles? Four miles? Five, six miles? No, we're like, we're closer to 10. I say 10 miles. We're 10 miles away on 35. How do we take an exciting topic and make it boring? I know, you can get a war to Google Maps. How do we get there? So, and also when you get to the blast radius,

you got to cut it in half because it's circular. So, we're also sorry to buy lands on a capital. Let's bottom line this. Basically, everyone at this table is gonna prefer the zombie apocalypse Yeah, yeah, I don't know. I mean like nuclear you can recover from that, you know I mean you can recover from zombies. How do you do that? Well, I mean also again? It's like what level of outbreak are we talking about? They can contain it. I mean it could get contained in the same level as a small percentage of humanity

Get their shit together for five fucking minutes to actually contain something you make it work right I mean not everything has to be Katrina or the eurozone oh my god lord back to the globe I'm just gonna push it in the direction I mean the zombie box was the eurozone we're fucked if it's if it's if we're doing a game here we have a comparison between the two in which we choose they have to be the same level of intensity so if you have a full-on nuclear war, we're going to full-on zombie apocalypse. 95% of the population is dead or converted to zombies. Is that fair? 95%. That's tough. That's tough. Yeah. So what's five, what's 5% of now where it's 7 billion? Where's that 350 million? In a lot? 5%. Yeah.

350 million? Okay. There still is something like it. There's a zombie breakout and 95% of the population gets affected, but you're in a building where you're locked into the building and a zombie doesn't bite you for that Time you could say all right. I'm safe versus like if you're in a nuclear holocaust You know you could be the word say the word again. I'm just gonna stop so you're And you could be fucked without knowing it. Versus like during the zombie thing, somebody has to bite you. In a zombie thing, you can't sleep.

There's something about that. Well, you could lock yourself into a room and probably you're okay. Whereas if you're locked in that same room, you could be totally fucked and not know it. That's the thing that creeps me out about. I'm trying to, don't try to forget what 5% of 7% of Indiana's hold on. I'm totally looking at nuclear bombs on Austin now.

Everyone's gonna get their different devices. If live some movie that we're just doing the exposition for the zombie apocalypse happening like I don't know it's 3 o'clock this afternoon. There's some big apocalypse brought on by nuclear missiles that are left over from the Cold War and have some kind of disease agent on them as well. It is a little scary to think about that. What was the percentage looking for?

It's 350 million, we were right. That's a lot of people. There was about, the estimate was about 250 million people alive in the world when Jesus was born. So 2000 years ago, there were many people. 250 million to 7 billion, That's pretty fucking impressive. That seems like too many people. 250 million? 2000 years ago? Yeah, it seems like we would have more people by now.

What are you talking about? Yeah, that seems that's the number same. Listen, this might be a little morbid in our talk of zombie apocalypse and, uh, nuclear holocaust. But in the actual holocaust, I wonder how many people would be alive today if not for all the people killed during but it's a all of world war two because i think some work like forty million people were killed in world war two everything on together

or even like the bubonic plague or like all these mass death events that occurred throughout history crazy number broke broke from the fragtals uh... posted uh... uh... world war two stuff the other day and I think you would mind about it. It's high. 70 million people died.

20 million Russians died. Yeah. That's the thing a lot of people forget. What? How many Russians died? Yeah, a bunch of them died. These happened between, like, they really went through a brutal campaign in when the Germans tried to invade the Soviet Union.

There was a Russian philosophy that the two greatest generals in the Russian army are generals January and February. Just a Russian winter has so improved. Yeah. Every now and then you'll see posts. It seems like Russia is just going crazy, right? The Soviet Union is just... I saw this video of these guys.

They took a girl and they were on like an eight story like one of those apartment complexes that you see in Russia like the state run things and they tied like a bunch of cord to a chimney And then they just I mean she was voluntarily doing this They slither off the roof and she like did this big arcing swing to the courtyard of the apartment complex It just looked like something they were just trying That sounds fucking awesome Fucking crazy and they see the dudes like in Russia where they're like on top of those towers

and they walk out on the beams, they just are fucking crazy now. They just don't give a fuck at all. I'm sure you've seen also those videos of those kids in Russia who like run out when there's a train and they lay on the track. Under the train, everything's over. Every time I see a video nowadays

where it's like some kid shooting in AK-47 and letting himself on fire, they're always always a brush. Yeah That's for that guy that if he has Russia guys see those those guys are just asking for the zombie apocalypse They're just asking for it. There's bored. They need real where would it start where does zombie apocalypse start? I would think Russia. I'd got it i think anything either massive disease zombie apocalypse or even like super hero comes out it they're coming out of china or india there's over two billion people

between those two countries are i thought i'd go to look up russian girl on google so i think russian girl a google autocomplete for me russian girl eating by bear and that's the first that's the first one it's like you can't even russian girl it wants to say russian girls get by bear and that's the first one as a you can be typing Russian girl it wants to say Russian girls get eaten by bears that's what I remember that story that's an awful story is it she

called her mom yeah that's the one oh yeah that's awful I was gonna say let's wrap up but we can't wrap up on on such a fucking awful morbid what positive thing are we gonna This is the run on the part my complex. That's like a rope that they've tied together with bench sheets How does that not break your spine when she hits like the limit of that rope? Oh I see this on the left to sit you there That is insanity Look at this. These are her buddies like these are the guys who would give you free ice cream They're like we have enough ice cream in Russia, we're going to throw you off the building.

These guys are secretly hoping she's the tracker. Holy crap. God. There is not a lot of like engineering that went into that rope swing. I'm pretty sure I heard her spying snap to it. Yeah, I heard that crunch. How many feet do you think she's off that fence at the bottom two like five feet? She's lucky maniacs and of course it's snowing. It's always snowing in Russia or whatever reason I Would love to visit Russia. Let's go

Where do you want to go? Two o'clock it's it's scary how much of my world geography I know from 2 o'clock. It's it's scary how much of my world geography I know from video games and board games like risk taught me like I'm you want to go to your kutsk? God or com chatka com chatka that's what I always remember it's up in the Northeast right? Yeah, it's like everybody knows where Madagascar is. I think that's where I'm going to learn where Iceland is from. It was very huge. Yeah, yeah, I also know a lot of my a lot of my Russian geography from command and conquer and beach Everybody be sure I know talking about so I know I know a lot about that. So where do you want to go? You want to go to Minks? You want to go to Lemongrad? Let's go. I tried to get I just think of Rochelle Rochelle when I hear over

Rochelle Rochelle I tried to get Bernie good to Macau I know but when we were over there on that side of the planet, but he didn't go I didn didn't go. You're right. But I also tried to get you to stick around for an extra week and go to the South Island of New Zealand. I'm not. Where we already weren't. I mean, you wouldn't fucking stay. Interested in less. There's a big casino there. It was awesome. It was awesome. South Island of New Zealand isn't. I'm more of an indoor cat. You are an indoor guy because he stayed in Auckland for the week. The brand and I went down to Madamatta. We could not fit you on. We could not fit you on. We could not fit you on. We could not fit you on. We could not fit you on. We could not fit you on. We could not fit you on. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. We could not fit you out. What do you do for fun? What Joel Heyman finishes work, he's done playing Kaboosh for the day.

He leaves the office. What's playing Kaboosh for the day? What do you go to all day long? That's a lifestyle baby. I just sit there and say something to the microphone and then we just take, put it into the jail. The big whistle blows. I don't know what I've been doing.

I don't know what it's all about. That's all right, I do fun things. You pledge the time clock and then what do you go do? I have fun things. You do. I'm working on a virus. Like last weekend I went went and flew a kite Did you I did it size and there was an angry birds kite?

I know they made they make angry bird. I would make angry birds everything. They do they do they really do So like I never fly a kite What was the last thing you did that was an outdoors thing? What was the last thing? I did well No, I mean I exercise run Okay, I got side that that's true. Yeah, but it's not exercising. I also went to a bar with you when we sat outdoors at an outdoor table. That was at that. That counts as outdoors, yeah. It's nature. I mean, I like to look at nature through a glass window, but I don't want to buy you. I gotta agree with Joel here. Yeah.

I really want to minimize my time outside. No, why? We spent millions of years crawling out of that and developing the technology to build walls and an air conditioner? You know, I'm gonna fucking sit on top of that thrown of technology. I was not at the outdoors The window I was not I was not like this before and you know what did it for me was um working on sets outside That will change you that will change you when you were trapped outside I When you were trapped outside, I get you. In the middle of the fucking woods and all night long, again and again and again. I mean, that can get really miserable.

Yeah. I mean, like the worst stories you hear of like soldiers sitting at the middle of nowhere guarding something and freezing their ass off. Like not doing anything, just sitting there. That's basically what it was like. You're really your out there. You're out there.

Well, no, there's a war. You're like, that's like a ball to hit a rock. I'll win her. I'm gonna back away from that now. I'm gonna slowly back away from that. Well, you're sitting in the crowd. Not gonna be like, being pretzels. The Coco's only lukewarm.

She's probably the top coca. Backing away. Alright, let your rep this shit up. I'm pretty long. What are we going for? This is really long podcast. I'm just gonna listen to this. How long was this podcast? It's only like an hour and a half People like long podcast. Yeah, I quit fighting you. I wouldn't have to sweet spot. So we're gonna go for a pair Let's go for lunch down here. It's a problem. How can you say that there's a billion restaurants?

Oh, I said this when we move to the same thing. I don't know what you know. I know we can go suck We need to go to Garcia's what's Garcia's chicken fried chicken Oh, shit. We haven't had a long time. Yeah, never make a good Thanksgiving thing, but man are they open on two days? They're not open on Monday's I think so this is a small little Mexican restaurant that's in a house that's across the street from our chicken you'd office fried chicken covered in queso chicken fried chicken can come on top. It's pretty damn good For all those people who don't have queso queso is the best food substance There is yeah, you can put it on anything you living in California

Do you have they do not really have queso there? Do you have any preference for California Mexican food? Baja versus fuck? No, I feel so bad for Californians like it's not right It's like cheeseburgers in New Zealand like the putting beats You get like salsa like I live in L.A. You get salsa known as like zucchini in the salsa It's like who the fuck is putting fucking zucchini and salsa. Mm-hmm. What in the fuck is that's not all right awful I'm with you. I pity them. It's not right. Stop getting creative. The certain things you do not need to change

or alter your creative about. And salsa and case, that's done. It's done. That's done. Move on. I'm not going to fire it. Accept it. I'm that way with sushi. To me sushi is a square of rice with a piece of fish on it.

Okay. That's what I just agree with. If you go to LA, please call it sushi dand. Where they get a jalapeno. They chop the jalapeno in half. They put raw fish in there along with cream cheese. Cream cheese, and then deep fry that bastard. They flash fry it deep fried. Oh, I mean, you take a bite out of that thing,

it changes your life. They're called monkey fire crackers. And they're delicious. Yeah, they have a bunch of crazy stuff like this. Did you all eat that monsoon pune while you were in New Zealand? No. Oh, God. No, we did we did to go to the bar. I already told that story, but I didn't you weren't we went to the bar. The red the bar that had the rivers blue drink. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And then a bar a drink just the blue part and then through the rest of the floor. He did. And I was'm like it was a free journey Fuck you red part. No, no one got it

And then just as an asshole a bar American okay, well let's wrap this up for real now, but seriously we have to decide where we're going to lunch where we going to lunch I don't care that they said the other place around here suck Garcia's to confide I was to pick anywhere. I'd say mighty fine Mighty fine. Where's my oh my fine? I'm Brody. I'm Brody. That's pretty far away That's a hamburger place. It's pretty good. They have an automatic hand washing pretty good Mighty fucking good. My fine is okay. You want you want a front? Why do you like my fine? I'm going to my fine That's it. Fuck it. I taught it. Why?

Why do you like my like stuff? What's the best? It's the best cheeseburger in Austin the best cheeseburger in Austin It's probably at Cas casino El Camino? Fucking stupid, but where do you think the best? What's the second? First of all, it takes 50 minutes. You've got a goddamn hammer there. He asked for the best not the fastest You have to pass a good fucking McDonald's know the best the best it's all it's overall score There's different categories Right now let's just talk about tastes at Creek. at creek is good thank you where are they

at least a good trailer is not there there is a good time for net that's what he's talking about let's go there now where's the net we're not going to pass north there's like one closer to where any knows goddammit Emily what's the best place to eat in Austin? it's the best burger place burger place?

yeah um... i like sandies oh yeah sandies good i've never been there. It's good. And you get custard. Not that not that crazy free ice cream. You actually have frozen. Oh, see, that's a little bit of insight. Custard girl. Yeah, did you give me free custard there? Oh, how many places you get free food at? You get free food. You get free food everywhere, don't you? No. I remember the night of poker, they gave you free food. That was so tough.

So where are we going, guys? I'm going to Modify. You all are welcome to come, if you want to go to Modify. I think I might join you in Modify. That sounds Modify. I might do that. Use your automatic handwasher and give it. I have clean hand sticker.

And I'll be happy. All right, thanks for listening. Wait. Describe the show to a newcomer in a more familiar way. Do you like apples? Alright, example. Together in Trempit hosts... Characans.

Characans are free to deal with nothing to do with this podcast. Analyze various unsolved and rooster-teeths cryptic podcast. F**k face. Call to action. Feel free to add something show premise specific, but short. Listen to show name on Apple Spotify or wherever you get podcasts. It's f*** face, a podcast.

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