Rooster Teeth Podcast - RT Podcast #155

Episode Date: February 29, 2012

RT gets hairy and fairy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's time to put your pedal to the metal. From the twisted minds behind Deadpool and Zombieland, an executive producers, Will Arnett and Anthony Mackie comes the new Peacock original series, Twisted Metal, a high-oxane action comedy based on the classic video game series. Anthony Mackie stars as John Doe, a motormouth outsider who must deliver a mysterious package across a post-apocalyptic wasteland. If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnett, and Thomas Hayden Church.

Twisted metal, streaming now, only only on peacock. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Hello, everyone. This is Bernie Burns. Hey, I am Jeff Ramsey. Castorola, Joel Heyman.

And now it's a podcast. That's all. I want to hear that podcast. Was that Kathleen doing all the voices? No, it was someone on the site and his quote unquote friends. Was that one girl? It sounded like one girl with her voice. The user, the user who made this podcast

is red underscore design on the site and he said he had four of his female friends do the voices. See, everyone would rather hear that podcast than this one, right? Why can't I see Joel? Where are you, Joel? I'm here. I got nothing on you. Nothing?

What was that, Pedro? They even broke the mic. Did you have funny? I can hear him through my headphones. Yeah. You hear him on the other channels. Roy Gav? Hello, ladies. You fucked this up. Yeah, you hear him on the other channels Roy. Yeah, hello, ladies Hello, more names Gavin and I like to fuck up the pop

Yeah I don't know They'll be done soon though. Why'd you back? Let's see. No, we'll keep going Yeah, yeah, you say the when you see if the steam coming out the top of the team's coming out the top It's working. So now my mic is working. Yes. Now your mic is working now my mic is working I had the great commentary that I have. Oh, I'm sure they picked it up in the other like what did I just say? How did I wire it up wrong? I? Have no idea you've wired a lot of things up wrong. Your brain your brain's fucking wired wrong. I mean we talked about

Oh, that was unnecessary. Hey, his his ball sack I crossed. It's true. Gus You've heard a lot of things up wrong your brain your brain's fucking wired wrong. I mean we talked about He's his ball-side guy crossed. It's true Gus No, no, I was just saying The girls at the beginning everyone would rather hear that podcast. Oh, yeah, I don't know. Yeah, totally It could be an hour of girls giggling. Let's not give any competitors potential ideas All right, why don't we have a little bit of confidence in the product that we put out there Joel? Have you heard us? No I haven't. Have you met us? I wouldn't say we put the product out there as it's so much like slides off our computer. It's like we sound very polished. I mean we're, have you met at work jerks? Who would want to listen to some fat ugly jerks talk about their fat ugly stupidness? Hey and one stupid gay guy from Europe.

That's well. Not that it's anything wrong with it. Who's the fourth jerk if we have the gay guy from Europe? Do I count as fat ugly and gay or? We're all, we're all just... I have a bone to pit with you guys. I have no questions. I shouldn't say that. My bone is...

When the hell are you gonna play an intro with my name on it on a podcast that I'm actually on oh I should find one of those really do a lot of Research into the intros. Yeah, there's always people that aren't on it. Oh girls After I left last time the next like ten podcasts Let's be honest guys if not who girls it's who next one in the list But that was a good one was it I thought it was great. Let's take a vote. No, it loses. It was not a good one We got a gift today. I just hope look let's let's be honest the guy got together four of his female friends to recording intro and now we've used it I hope it worked

Yeah, I hope his little play in, everything worked out fine. He's only got them on the most popular video game podcast on iTunes with over three million downloads a month. He's going to have sex with four girls. If he had, if he had, really, I would take odds on that. But if he could give us their names, then we could have said their names too. So you amateurs out there, if you put, if you you sent pictures, we could have put them in the link though He didn't use himself so that's it. So the guy got together four of his friends

I think it was just one and like he sounded like he acoustically. Oh really? I could be wrong. I got a key. He's CGI That would make sense for a podcast it would make 12 cents absolutely You know, I'm talking about the gift Yeah, hard move would be to use the one girl and use her four times. Like that's like that's a Contrary not for nobody would do that. I think you did it. I think I agree with you. I thought it Was the same girl. It sounded like Kathleen. I think it was the same girl. Yeah, look find out. It was It was it was obviously the same. When was that submitted? Oh, like December 2010. Oh wow. So you,

I mean, that's the guy's plan, right? Am I right? I mean right can we be honest like he's got the long play going well no I mean every guys plan I mean it's all about the plan. I mean if you're going out and buying a cheeseburger Somehow that's part of the plan Everything that a guy like doing part of the plan not all plans are great But I mean let's face it right. It's all just one big long plan. I wouldn't but Jack at she's better today Did you take that the wrong way maybe part of somebody's plan out of the man? Somebody's part plan. I mean that's that's the only reason what plans have you made today, Joe? I haven't made any plans you've got a couple of Starbucks coffee. I do have a couple of Starbucks coffee and I drank

I got the back into cycle with coffee where I ordered the giant venta and I was like oh We're gonna do a podcast. I'm gonna load up on caffeine great, and then we didn't Do it in the morning and that's your probably happy about that design. Yeah. Awesome. You guys are fucking ecstatic. Hey, I think you met this guy in Australia. He took this picture. Yeah. And he made friends with me on Facebook and immediately tagged that photo of me with those two attractive young models from his booth. Do you think that those girls were the voices? No, they weren't, because they didn't have an accent. Oh, that's the guy who submitted it.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, those are girls. Yeah. No, no, they don't have an accent. It doesn't matter if they don't have an accent. They just, they. Those girls are from New Zealand. In New Zealand, they have accents.

Everyone has an accent. Joe, New Zealand accent. Do I have an accent? Australia. Australia, New Zealand. that was the same thing. It's the same accent. That was from our event at Melbourne. That I see that bothers me.

You'd always say Melbourne. But it's just say Melbourne. Melbourne. You got to play to the audience, man. Ed and Borough. Do you know the capital of Australia? The capital of Australia is Adelaide. I don't think so. No, I don't think so. It's not. No, I don't want to say that in confidence. What the capital of Australia is Adelaide?

No, I don't think so. No, I don't want to say that I'm confident It's a person. I'm gonna go with I think it's Ken Barra. It's can't fucking it is It is can't bear a goat's favorite. Yeah, Gus is right. Who's ever heard of that city? I know obviously I can't always say Sydney or Adelaide I know I've never heard of that I'm gonna be Adelaide is a place in Australia. I'm looking it up just so I can be like, get this. I'm also smart. Gush went skiing when he was down there. Yeah, upside down skiing.

I cannot imagine Gush skiing. What was that process like for you? So the first time we ever went to Australia was like in, I want to say the summer of 04. It was summer for us. It was winter for them. We went down there. We were there for an event We went down there. Um, you know, the part we were there for an event, uh, with, uh, at the, at Akami, the Australian Center

for the movie image. And, uh, the first night we were there, we went to this party, this mixer that was actually at the Akami event at the Akami Center. And we met a bunch of people. We met this one girl who was like, Oh, is your first time in Australia? And we're , and we were jumping out of like, yeah, it's our first time here. She said, All right, we're going skiing tomorrow. And I was like what? She goes yeah yeah yeah I'll pick you guys up like five in the morning where it's gonna drive to the mountain when it goes skiing. Like we never even met this person. She never met us. We could have fucking killed her.

And she drove. Okay could have killed. Or she could. Yeah. Yeah. So she we got in the car with her. She drove us like four hours out of Melbourne to four hours to some mountain. I want to say it was Mount Bollard.

That's my right before you get to that. That's like my worst nightmares Like big what if you don't get along with the stranger and then you're trapped in a car with them for four hours Yeah, and then we spent the night at that cabin like out on the mountain as well It's a chance that Gus wouldn't get along with a stranger What's the possibility? We're also idiots because we were driving up there and it wasn't snowing when we got there But there were signs on the side of the road that's put snow tires on. It's like, all right, I guess we got to put snow tires on.

So we pulled over and put snow tires on the car, even though we didn't need to. We made it snow tires a chain. A chain, sorry, snow chains on. That makes me see, we just almost had a tire that took that much of a lot. I don't know what that was. And so apparently we were driving down the road and it was just arcing everywhere, picking gravel up off the road. We just had a headlight, fluid snow. Someone had to pull us over until it's to take the chains off picking gravel up off the road. You just had a headlight, fluid tone.

Someone had to pull us over until it's taken chains off because we were destroying the road. That's not gravel, yeah. That's actual asphalt being ripped out of the road. Yeah, chains are not good for, they're not healthy for your car or the road or anything. It's just a terrible thing. No, chains have not been used in a horror movie.

I haven't seen that yet, because they're used in real life. A tire was two chains on. No, three brutal. Have you seen that movie. I haven't seen that yet. Because they're used in real life. A tire was so huge on the film. Pretty brutal. Have you seen that movie that's streaming on Netflix? I think it's called Rubber. It's about the killer tire. I love that. I want to watch it, but the description on it

sounds so ridiculous. It was a little bit like a trailer for it. It's sort of like a good performance artist piece almost. The thing, it was funny. I did watch this movie and it's like, the unfortunate thing is I feel like if had the movie been an hour instead of like an hour and a half it would have been better. They did too much. Let's look at make it make an hour movie. How's that been a good hour long movie? Does that have a half? There's a lot of movies that are good hour long

that should be an hour long that should not be. I recall correctly the original toy story is 72 minutes long. Yeah it's pretty short. Rubber is a 2010 French comedy film about a tire that comes to life and kills people with its psychic powers. Why wouldn't you watch that? I was directed and written by Quentin Dupu. The film was shown at the 2010-10 film festival. It had some really good scenes in it. I did like to correct my previous statement. The runtime of Toy Story is 81 minutes.

So just shy. Robert is 82 minutes. So they got a full extra minute of narrative. Wasn't that old Jim Care movie master disguise? Wasn't that like 65 minutes or 70 minutes? I've never been. Jim, that was a... I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Dana Carvey. Master of disguise. Yeah, it was like a super short movie. Really? I would pay, I don't care. If the movie's going to be. Master of the Skies. Yeah, it was like a super short movie. Really? I would pay, I don't care. I'd write, if the movie's gonna be better, if the story's gonna be better, the less time I'm good with that.

I'm off of that as well. I don't want extra lengths just to pat it out. I don't have the time. I just don't have a pen clip. I, I try to, this thing could be three minutes long. Really, if we were real, yeah. Master of the Skies is 80 minutes long. I tried to watch Tree of Life on the way back from San Francisco the other day.

I think a lot of people were describing this that way. I tried to watch the Tree of Life. Tree of Life like two hours and 15 minutes long. Uh-huh. I got 20 minutes in, which I feel like should be an achievement. Uh-huh. It was a bizarre... Who on best picture? Movie.

A bizarre picture. It was like stock footage or transitional scenes cut from other movies. Who on Best Picture? Movie. The artist. The artist. Yeah. Like, it was like stock footage, or transitional scenes, cut from other movies. It was like just long shots of a beach. It did have that, or... Or... That reused a shot that they put in transformers with the car. I'm sure it was in there eventually, and with just like weird narration, very little

actual on-screen dialogue. And at 20 minutes, you're like, that's it, I can't handle it. Yeah, I kept wondering, I can wait for the movie to start. So maybe it just wasn't for me. Maybe I didn't get it. I don't think we're going to get these boilers here. I have also seen about the first 20 minutes. Let's try to describe together what happens in the first 10 minutes.

So Sean Penn is in an elevator. Well, you'll ask me a Sean Penn. And then Brad, Brad Pets in a different time. He's in an earlier time period. He's like in the 50s. And he's got kids. And they're just,pitz in a different time, he's an earlier time period. He's like in the 50s and he's got kids and they just, they're in, they're walking a picnic like picking up the kids. And then there's a waterfall. No, and yes, there's a waterfall.

And then there's a telegram. I don't remember a telegram. The telegram gets there and then Bradpitz wife starts crying. Yes. And then there's only one kid. And then Sean Penn is in the elevator. Right. Again. And then you're in space. I made it to space. Did you get the space? I did not make it space you make it to the whole movie either

I got it to nebulous and then I was like how far how far is that I don't know it must be just over 20 minutes I was afraid I fell asleep in like the earth glass Let me ask you this question. Do you feel like there was a great payoff? I mean it's hard to say but you think they were going somewhere Were they leading into something is a great payoff for all the stuff or? Joel, I honestly don't know honestly have no idea. Huh. I would be the guy in the Emperor's new clothes like the guy at the bridge I was like, what's happening? Why is everyone making so I wouldn't have enough wear with all to pretend along with everyone else? I don't know what happened in that movie. Is it actually clips of different movies?

No, no, that's just what I just watch it. I mean, it's just what it is. Yeah, you get the feeling in the first five minutes. You don't have to sit 20 minutes like I did. I've got the feeling already. Like quote for the poster. Watch it. I don't want to. I wonder. How do you print with trepidation and fear? How do you print in a British accent? I get I just use old English font. Did it win any awards? Uh, I don't know.

Did it win the cinematography thing? No. But it got nominated. Cinematography was Hugo. If it got nominated, it must have some sort of redeeming something must have been going on. Can I ask, what is the deal with Sean Penn? What's the big deal about Sean Penn?

He's a great actor. Is he? You don't think so? What's he been in this? I think he's a good actor, yeah. I mean, he's a good actor. I think he's a good actor. I like him in everything I've seen him in.

I think I've just seen him interviewed more than I've seen him in films. And he's just across his douchey. Oh, look at you. I just, I guess, I guess sometimes when, and this is who, I don't know, who might have say anything about anybody, really. But, um, do it. Say stuff. I don't know.

Sometimes when they get a little political that sort of turn off to me. I don't know Yeah, I could see that well, it's only when they're political in the other way, right? No either way. Oh really at all. Yeah Yeah, so it must be a real treat for you Gavin to be in the United States in 2012 Yeah, we're gonna have a presidential election. I was actually here when I was inaugurated When who was inaugurated. When who was inaugurated? The president. Who was that? He's Obama. Who's that vice president?

Biden? That's correct. I thought you were going to say the jack of the box guy. I couldn't name the vice president of England. I can't even name my country. Who's the vice queen? Okay, now this is actually great. This is actually great.

This is a mural, mural street. Right? So one, the honorary. So explain to us, why do you have a royal family? Like, what do they do? This is 2012. Why don't the people take their stuff? I'll tell you exactly what they do.

Because they make a great reality TV show. Yeah, that'd be good. They don't pay taxes. That's what they do. They don't pay taxes? No, they know. Why would they? They're the world family.

They are ordained by God. I don't think taxes. No, they know by what they they're the world family. They are ordained by God I don't think she needs a possible either the queen You mean only to get back into the UK. She needs a passport to get in the other country No, I don't want to all of you guys just sort of down Queen I'm looking at all of you guys get together. I want to be king to pack and do that Just get together and just go take your stuff back Just go get together just go take your stuff back. Just go get together.

Just take your chest back. Gus, why would you look that up? Let's say she does have a passport. Who the fuck is gonna check it? Well, she doesn't have a lost name for a second. No, no, no, no, no. What you said she doesn't have a lost name? She's just a queen, a queen Elizabeth.

I mean, you could say Windsor is a lost name, but that's why she lived, isn't it? They didn't have a lost name. Yeah, and I don't know I don't understand yeah, I really have no knowledge of it. So Prince William William It's last hurt Pritzleton Well, what was Diana's last name before she got married Charles Prince Charles Prince Charles what oh exactly man how old would Diana be today if she was

Imagine the late 40s no late 40 she'd be like 60 oh it's you're that old I should be she'll be 60 get out of it. I'm maybe maybe 52. Hey, did you hear a 50 He heard of a site called an intrade no intrade is a site where you can go and This is the worst segue ever gamble on like who's gonna win the presidency or who's gonna win the nomination? Like the Red River. Yeah, yeah, yeah. See, that's awesome.

Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, that's awesome. So we got a present. After podcast 153 where we were talking about baths and how you dry yourself, if you have a method. Someone, I guess the user on the site named Fallout sent us butt face towels.

I love you Fallout. So they're essentially towels that are colored, two different colors, and one side in big letters is butt, the other side in big letters is face. The butt side is brown while the face side is white. That's another good way to indicate what side should be using I made a joke about you know if you share the towel with your loved one who got which side? You give them the butt side. What about the nobside?

But you have to share a towel with your loved one. Do you guys dry off at the same time? Is that something that people maybe you're maybe very lazy and just you You pick it up with the towel so you say towel share a towel Do you mean literally the same time you dry off together like this some romantic thing that you do? Why not have you done that? Probably you've dried off with one towel at the same time. It's for the environment. I've never done that for the environment I want to say a towel. We don't photo. Oh, it's actually like I'm sorry to say it's quite thin. Oh, You know, it's funny like they

gave us like you you when you're working to set they give you like towels or whatever is like a gift a Christmas Or whatever and these towels were terrible. They were like they'd like spray paint on like letters wherever and so it was like it was like They were spray paint letters on to a towel. Yeah, it was just like the worst like Pissed holiday. You know like you can sign paper Well, they said it was like sandpaper. Yeah, I didn't look good No, what were they spray painting on the like the words of the show that was on like criminal I mean a criminal minds towels

It was like criminal reasons it felt like spray paint. It was just like They stenciled it didn't look good. They stenciled them and then look at the Fugus like what's the what's the point of this? What is the point of it? What is terrible gift? How do we go from spray painting to silk screening? I'm lost. Well, I'm assuming he just said to know that we're silk screening. Oh my god, the lemon just assume that. Diana was born in 1961.

Today she would be 52 years old. I wasn't far off. So you're late 40s to 52 is not far off. But you were way wrong. What did I say? I said, you said like 60. Yeah. I wasn't far off. So you're late 40s or 52s not far off. But you were way wrong. What did I say? You said like 60. Yeah. Dude, she was young. There's a big difference between 50 and 60. Dude, you know, that was a guy in that crash who survived the driver. Three people died. I think the driver died, didn't he? Are you sure? But that was one way. There were four people in the car, four people in the car, and one person lived really and Was a bodyguard? I don't know

But imagine being the the person who survived that crash to be crazy He also had to have his face like the front of his skull reconstructed from photos because it was smashed in so bad It sucks. It's good. You wouldn't want to be the driver and survive that because it was a driver They were drunk, wasn't they were running away from how do you say the paparazzi paparazzi and they were in a tunnel in Paris right and they clipped a pillar and hit me. Oh here's a good tribute question for you. Who was Diana dating and who was in the car with her? Who was the name of the gentleman she was dating after you get? He was that Arab guy right Yeah, I It's on the tip of my tongue Can I can I make a guess? Sure

Vody or dope fired fired. Yeah, yeah, that sounds right your costume. Don't you fight it? Don't you correct? Was it was a not alphired alphired? Was it not maybe a right? Al is a term of respect, right? Isn't it? I don't add it to names like sir. I'm not, you know, wherever he was from. Okay. Okay. Man, I have no idea why that's like, even in the recesses of my mind, even though I didn't know what I was kind of close. I think there's a son of a, he's a son of a billionaires, something like that guy, wasn't he?

Yeah. I thought he was, right? In nod, Eldin, Mohammed, Abdel, Monamel, Fad, Fyed. I didn't say, no one is also with Dolly. Well that makes things a lot easier. Egyptian film producer. Wow. Egyptian film producer.

Yep. 1997, Diana died. Wow, it didn't, it's a long time ago. Yeah. I mean, our kids are growing up and getting married now and everything like that. Everyone was crying that day. Everyone had a tear. Yeah, it's funny. I mean, it's funny. It just crying that day. I remember what happened. I remember what happened.

I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened.

I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened.

I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I remember what happened. I don't know. It just seems like sometimes like when somebody who I guess is supposed to be important dies, it's like the major media and everybody's got to throw up their hands, like it's the greatest. You know, whereas like a lot of great fantastic people who no one knows about, they die wherever and it's just, I don't know, it seems like a lot of violence. Depending on the media, isn't it?

Like, there are a bunch of great people who have died. You know, the media is just like hey She was pretty great. I Guess what did she do? She delays the stuff Now she you know she was considered a commoner even though she came from a high society family, right? I'm not saying I'm not saying she's a bad person or anything like that But it's like the bridge shows up on the podcast and we have a princess It's a good thing we have the all shows up on the podcast and we have a princess diamond. And at the time of this, the Trunk Tech is the Trunk Tech.

It's a good thing we have the all ladies in trope for the royalty. I want to get to the bottom of that. So she was big, if I recall correctly, her big issue was landmines. I think so also. And she was like, she was trying to get rid of all the landmines from all these wars where they just put landmines and grand and kids would fucking step on them. Yeah. Just walking along and stepping a goddamn landmine.

Well, from like wars that ended ages ago. That's always been a fucking step on them. Yeah. Just walking along and stepping a goddamn land on. From like, wars that would end it ages. Yeah. That's always been a big, big problem. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's big like in Southeast Asia where like after Vietnam and Cambodia and a lot of places like that, they just deploy the minds and then of course you don't pick them up.

Right. I shot some minds with a slow-mo camera, the ones that like leap out of the ground and explode. Jesus. Did you really? Like a bouncing beddie, is that what they called? I think a bouncing beddie used to bounce on the water with a slow-mo camera, the ones that like leap out of the ground and explode like these face- Like a bouncing Betty, is that what they call? I think a bouncing Betty used to bounce on the water

into like dams and stuff. Well maybe a bit earlier. The whole duty. Oh, I might be right in there. I might be right in there, but they just like sort of spring up into there. Yeah, right in your face. So how might they go up to your face?

I thought they only went to like knee level. Oh, I don't know, maybe we weren't using like actual ones from the time they were like recreating ones. So maybe. That must have was a bit they came pretty high I thought they went knee level to like me me and not kill you what what would be the point because then it takes Additional manpower to drag a wounded person away. I just became the right the science of military stuff Yeah, it's fucking horrible. It really is. It's like how can we hurt you as badly as possible? But not kill you so that it takes up three people

as opposed to shoot somebody that died. It's one person of the battlefield. You shoot the guy, have him go down screaming. Then when you get three people have to go off the battlefield to park the guy off. And to moralize everybody else. It's horrifying. They talked about uranium and rich tank shells that we have. Basically uranium and rich tank shell, you're supposed to hit another tank with it obviously. Right.

And then the uranium basically gets injected into the inside of the other tank where it then liquefies everything. So the tank's fine but everything inside it's just melting. Well, the tank's pretty fucked up, but people in the inside are liquid at the end of that process. Wait, wait, is that what the uranium stuff is? I thought uranium and case bullets were just,

they were for harder bullets These are these are artillery shells. I'm talking about I think I'm thinking about something else I know I think molten steel. Yeah, I think there's a dish. I don't think it's your uranium the mouse I think it's like another metal that actually like and Regardless you're not good getting gonna get coated with liquid metal It's also like that phosphorus stuff, which is like a new version of napalm, which is just frightening. Yeah, frightening.

So do we go like super macho to make up for the princess talk? Yeah, we do. We went to military theory. Yeah, another tank what you're talking about, it's basically like a giant syringe, it's the missile, and it hits the side of the tank, pierces it, and it collapses into the side of the tank,

which basically acts to that syringe action, and it just injects like molten metal inside the tank That's amazing how about the science of Coming up with stuff just a ruined human body I read an article that was linked on reddit we we pale in comparison to the mother fuckers from the Middle Ages and the stuff That I watched I read that one also one also. It was awful. It was just, I, like, one of the top ones on there that I saw was they would hang someone upside down by their feet. And they would use those two, like those lumberjack two-man saws that are the big band saw. And they would just saw down the middle of their pelvis.

Yeah. And the reason they put them upside down was so the blood would wash to the brain. And they would feel alive. They would stay alive longer. They could get to the brain and it's feel alive. They said they would stay alive longer Yeah, they could get to the stomach before most people passed out Yeah, that stuff is horrible like the drawn and quartering Yeah, the horses were you tie a whole see each limb That was one thing and you said the horse in each direction. Yep It was terrible. It was awful. I mean any any of those device It was a lot easier back then to keep the people in place

Right, I would believe in anything if you showed me any of those devices Yeah, like that's the thing like when they're gonna they they show you the instruments of your demise Oh, yeah, I was totally flat. No, yeah, I'll say whatever you need. I'll say whatever you need me to say I'm really we can work this out. Yeah, we can't we can we can figure this out Yeah, absolutely. I'm gonna we can we can figure this out. We can't We can't we can figure this out. We can't we can figure this out. We can't we can figure this out. We can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we can't we I mean, what you got to the tree movie, I'm like, that's it, I have the world's flat. Whatever you need me to say. Imagine if there was a way for you to kill yourself with your mind. What is that mean? Like, it's like, because people have to, like, people want to kill themselves. They can't. Like, you see, this is something that you'd say to somebody who's on drugs.

Why would you interrupt him saying this? Please keep going. But, like, you can't kill yourself with your mind. I mean, there's no other way. Well, I bet you could. You can't even suffocate yourself. You can't even, like, not breathe to death. I've got to stop. you're just not trying hard no Oh

Yeah, wait a second. Okay, so you're saying what if you could mentally kill yourself? Yeah, I like to die. I'm gonna decide to die Well, you kill these people that jump in in front of trains. It's like that's your love effort to go to I mean What if it just clips you you'd be the pieces and it'd be like? You'd be maimed. It'd be the worst thing. Oh my god. Did I tell you about The guy I met when I was filming trains crashing into stuff. I don't like where this is going. This is great I was Sound Koreans. I was once working on top here and they've crashed a train through a car in slow-mo just to see

You know what would happen and I was talking to a guy he was like a normal looking guy and I was like I would you do you work for a national rail which is like the main railway service in E.K. and he was like I just you know clear clear blockages on the on the tracks and I should pick up the people at pop and I was like what do you have help? He's like well when someone jumps in front of a fast moving train How do you live? How does that happen? It happens quite a lot and people just sort of explode into into pieces and he was telling me about this one time How much does he get paid? What did Rickson say? I'm curious. I don't know. So he picked the leisure relevant part of this story. It's relevant to me So this guy his job was to is it based on how many pieces he picks up?

That's the point. he has to go and like, fine. He has to pick up all of the pieces, because when they do the autopsy, they need all of the bits from that site. Apparently people go everywhere. You have to pick up all the pieces, pick up the diversion. You know what I mean? To rule, I'm sorry. So remind me, Gavin, how many pieces make up the human body? Shut up, right.

So he was telling me about this one time where it was a fast movement train. This guy was everywhere. I mean, you couldn't really tell what was what, but he couldn't find the head anywhere. Like, they had a team of like four people, they got the lambs and stuff. They're priming it into these bags. It turns out it was on top of his head the whole time. He just didn't, how could you have had the legs? So basically, they got all they could. They cleared up all the mess. of his head the whole time. I mean, he just didn't. How could you have had to do that? That's correct.

So basically, like, they got all they could. They cleared up all the mess. They did the autopsy. They never found the head. And they were doing an autopsy. Like, what killed him? What killed him? Well, we think the train might have killed him.

We have to make sure. He's buying the train facts. There's a million pieces. What is it? Is it for your tax dollars or going? We'll travel the mystery of it. Think think about it. Like if you murdered someone, that'd be a good way to, if they didn't do a good way to get rid of the body, shoot someone in the head, throw them in front of a train. Oh, right. How many people, how many people are there chopping people up into a million pieces to try and make it?

But if there's, if there's, if there's, there's a guy driving it's so many. If somebody is going to the trouble of like, I'm gonna chop this UW75 pieces and throw them by the train tracks, you've won. Just let that guy go. So they see if there's like drugs in the system and stuff like that. So they were kind of this guy up. They're not in the system anymore.

What system? What system? So what happened? What's the blistery? So the guy's doing the autopsy. The guy's doing the autopsy the guys doing the autopsy Cut in open and they noticed where his neck had been severed. Oh, fuck you They noticed a load of hair and it turned out yeah great that the guy

Checked it is guy had stood on the train tracks Ben over forwards the train had hit him in the top of the head and knocked his skull into his ribcage What found his head in his chest. Oh my God. So did the doctor didn't see that? So did they think that the doctor wasn't like you should look in the chest? Uh, I think that might be where his head is. Did they think that that is what maybe killed him?

That was, that was it. Oh, clearly the cause of death was his head getting smashed in his body. So now we've unraveled the mystery of how he died. I just like the idea of a board certified doctor Sitting in a more looking at a body that's been hit by a train But it's missing the head and he goes, well, I can't worry. I don't know. How can I be sure? What killed this person? Sounds of death unknown. It's unknown. Okay open case

We got to leave this one open. So let's investigate it It's like I found a I found some pair of glasses on top of the head that is injected inside the box Did you hear that that that the act who played Mr. Kruger on sign filled? Trying to commit suicide shot himself in the head and lived and then had to call 911 No, that's it makes me like what you talked about like like that like killing yourself mentally Like why do we get why we are in a real trend lately? We're really getting into that stuff. I have to notice this like that.

I'm gonna say, I noticed that too. Why, why, it's him. It's the English, I'm bringing in my bridge. Well, as you listen to those episodes, are we talking about stuff like that? I think the needle swung from the British Royal Family in Britain. Well, I thought, yeah, it was getting a bit sort of flowery,

hairy, fairy, and then I just, hairy, fairy. Is that a saying in the UK? It is now. Okay. So I want to go back to Gavin's Notion that you could kill yourself by thinking about it. Well, it would be like you know if you have to like The end of a then she has to blow up the ship. There's a lot of procedures to go through like pushing all this thing Right. It'd be like that. You have to really want to do it and you'd have to unlock something

But you'd be like I could just be like yes, dear brain, I want to die. The brain's like, are you sure? And you're like, yes. It's like, OK, push these three buttons for me. Dying in three seconds. Think about these three things at once. Yes, like twist your right, Nipple. Maybe that's what it is. Like, you think I have to think about three things.

Like, if you ever think of like, I don't know, don't do it guys. Don't do it. Orange monkey eagle. Oh, I'm dead. It could exist. And it just exists. The combination can be different for different people. How would we know? Because people die and like, what do you die inside?

I mean, you can't. He thought about that. It was so funny. I think orange monkey eagle does that with a bow. I don't want to get, I don't want to get like, there is a way for the mind to kill itself. And I don't want to get metaphysical about it. But all the mind has to do is go, hey, there's a knife.

I'm going to stick it in my face. But using, you know, exterior, that sort of medical. No, but I think what he's saying is like if you're I know what he's saying Bounce and unable to do anything. I like Joel's brain voice Hey, there's Stick it in you can make me It's funny because I hear that voice all the time but mostly it's like hey, there's a knife. Hey, there's a Dory go do the door Coffee pork coke in it so wait you did hey jody bade you got a knife runnin' over

feed me sprite and coke and coffee and water mmm let's wake up and have fun let's share cows you guys are way too fucking happy about this! Please let any of your brain into the cellar to your brain whenever voice can instruct you like you're under a remote control. You saying you've actually been staring at a knife and thought, I could?

No, you jab it into Bernie! It is actually amazing how close insanity can be. I mean, have you ever just been holding a knife? No. And you just think, you know, I could just go mental. No, no, no, no. The answer is no, because I mean, if you look statistically, how many people do that? Not many.

Well, that's something they always say like, but potential is, people are quitters. People are quitters. It is hard to, like, it is hard to, there's like a line say like they always say like but because but because people are quitters people are quitters It is hard to like it is hard There's like a line across where you have to do that, you know, I mean It's harder than you think I mean you see people at the time. It's like You're only one decision away from doing it though. I think it's more than one decision I'm gonna argue you

You have to do more make more than one decision. I don't know if do I stop guess No, but I could have still I could have thought yes one decision to do I know do I stab gas no but I could have so I could have thought yes one decision right no I'm not giving you any more right home by the way I'm not allowed in my car not going to eat with you I don't know you are a fucking side the bad I could hit the steering wheel on coming traffic no what the man I gotta tell you I've been playing a little bit of Saints Row 3 lately oh great game you should never drive after playing those games because it makes you crazy like there's a whole there's a whole I noticed in the game I want to get from point A to point B here I go yeah, and I'm just going there nothing Whatever I'm just going in that and that yeah, and it's totally true in real life

I found myself cutting through parking lots if you play in that state throw three though eventually You're just like I fuck every single call helicopter. Yeah, or I'm just gonna like steer through the pedestrians Because there's nobody on the side. I kind of freak myself out sometimes when I'm playing Grand Theft Auto Especially granted for where there's the bikes and stuff I will go out of my way to knock someone off a bike in that game If I have to turn left and I see a bike coming the other way on the right I'll go knocking down Really? What is it? It's funny. Just something about the physics and the way they come off just he's fucking insane. Aren't you realizing this?

Don't you remember that that's what he does when he plays a co-op or a game like a halo campaign And you play a level where all the Marines get off the pelican with you the first thing Gavin does is turn around and kill all of his Friendly AI. Why do you do that? That's just not we've been through this. It's just why she would Have you have you have you have you have you have you murdered any animals? In real life, no, I don't even kill a bug man Is this my shoe? Have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you, have you I'm out of here. No, the best thing about video games are ragdoll physics. Exactly. I like you don't kill the friendly AI. You don't get weird. I always feel bad.

It's not weird. But god damn it. You always restock that friendly AI. What's fucking bad? I noticed this too when I was playing a different game. It was an open city. Maybe crack down. It was prototype.

It was like a new tank. And people were just going to walk up and stop in front of your tank Mm-hmm, and they're freak out in front of your tank Why are you doing that? Don't walk in front of my tank because it's a tank in the city I mean that seems pretty rational. I would go. I wouldn't walk in front of one walking I wouldn't walk in front of a tank either, but maybe they turned the corner like this fucking tank here There was a guy in San Diego that stole a tank from the army base That is the best piece of video ever

People stole a tank Some video people were not real tank from the army base. The best pieces of video ever. People stole a tank. People were not real. It's walking to him and being like, I'm going to cross the street from the tank. There were no people. A tank in an urban environment was pretty awesome. Like a high speed chase on the highways that you see?

The dude in the front had a tank. Was he a military guy? No. No, he stuck onto the new Saudi north. He wasn't doing great. They let the keys in it. He was driving to the quarters of buildings and like driving to the cement barriers between lanes on the highway

First of all, like a Winnebago. That was really satisfying. It's like when you crunch a coke can It's just like that satisfying crunch. It's a for you to sing that all over your scale. Oh My god showing him the video. Where was this? Is he reversing? When was this is he reversing maybe does that so all the All the time I was like 92 or something like that so while Gavin is watching this video I'll tell you about something I read about online which was apparently Skyrim has all those stats of everything you've done in the game and There was this thing that I posted about going over to his friend house and his friend wanted to play Skyrim with him and He's I guess he is one of the things that Skyrim you have a house. Yeah, you can get a house

And then I heard about this and then he re-suffered and stabbed his friend No, this is close though. So he's playing with his buddy buddy of his on the couch and they're lo and the apartment or whatever and he's wandering around his buddy's house in Skyrim and the house is filled with dead villagers It's people from the village and he's killed them all and brought them back to his house Can you pick up buddies in the game? Yeah, you can. Cut off heads. You know, it's funny. Is it in a game environment like that? That makes sense to me.

Why not? See, I'm not a fear. The crazier part was he looked at the guy stats. The guy had completed one quest, like one side quest. And he was level 21 in the game, which seemed like it would take some time. And he got there just from killing villagers. No.

That would be like a great tool and a script to like discover that your room It's crazy or whatever and then and then that was his final post is like and he invited me over to his house to like Please sky room with him. It's like what does that say about what's gonna happen to him? It's like now that is actually what that is way worse than just shooting a I'm reading who's in your way or has gone You want but it is on the spectrum. No, it's not spectrum. No, it's not. No, it's not. You're serial killer stuff. That's what we're saying. Yes, yes, and you're a smaller version of that. No, no, I disagree. That completely, I would, that'd be weird. You are already

going down the path of like, what if I just said, yes, it's one question. My whole destiny will be changed. Everyone has the inhibitor chip in their their mind. Well not everybody inhibitor chip I don't know. Where is that it's out by the thyroid? It's by the the doom state advice where you can kill yourself by thinking about it by the orange eagle monkey Orange monkey eagle get it straight. Sorry, man. Do you believe that people can can die from Despair or sorrow like that their brain can kill their body? It's funny because like everyone has to read like bail wall for something right? And they're always talking about the poems of like oh she died of wooing or whatever like that their brain can kill their body. It's funny because like everyone has to read like bailable for something. Right.

And they're always talking about the poems of like, oh, she died of wooing or whatever. It's like, what the fuck? You're right, that is funny. Died of wooing. Died of wooing. It's like that's a negative fucking sense. But I think it can get me mourning, but okay.

Wooning, mourning, whatever. What's all the same to Joel? Wooing, wooing is the fault you love. It's like, like, like, we're supporting. Which is the worst thing that can happen to anyone. What's that? Yes, I can see how you would say that. I agree. But the, yeah, we

say like a, uh, uh, I'll quote Star Wars episode three when they said she's lost the will to live you're getting the will to live. And then the robot shows a little breaking part. We definitely were definitely not to the point. No, it didn't. I was like, I was

expecting it when that line happened. We're definitely not to the point where that should be allowed to be written into scripts. What, you're breaking my heart. She died of a broken heart. Yeah, or whatever, because it's just, let's stop that. I think I'm one of the first people in the world to ever see Star Wars in order.

What? She's Star Wars in order. Let me take it from the first year. What are you talking about? Everyone in this room has seen Star Wars in order. No, as in, you know, episode. Oh, I see because I saw one and two. How did it work?

The third one was out at the cinema. I saw that and I saw full five and six. I see what you mean. Okay. I swear, clarifying. Well, Joe was, I was, I was, I was going off of real time. Um, what's going off of it? Did anyone else did that?

Did I do the first time I met Gavin? Like in person when I met him? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Gavin's been on our site since he was about 15 years old and 14 so he's like this kid like he had really long hair back then and he would post pictures of himself where do these like special effects Where he clone himself? There's like eight Gavin's in one foot and he had that picture of all the dead bodies Exactly, I'll start to weigh in his house. He was level 21 But so I went over to you were I think at this point about 18

And I'd known you for a couple years now, so it wasn't at all weird. No, I was I wasn't as old as that No, cuz you didn't drink yet. No, yeah, you were 17 Um, and so I went over to parish France home of the Eiffel Tower because I had to do this was the best trip ever Joel this almost goes a trip you and I do Scotland I had to go over to parish for this festival where they wanted to meet a present on Machinima and because I don't speak French at a level. I had a translator so I do 30 minutes because I had a translator. I really only had to do 15 minutes. I'm a little fromage.

Yes, so I spent five days in Paris for basically 15 minutes of work that I had to do. Presentation. Yeah, what was your speech like? Was it just sort of dry? Or did you try and... No, it's not like you're talking about machine. The cool thing about machine-a-mo is that it's as an art form, it's very much... it's much more respected in Europe and in Australia.

So if we ever have to go talks about good, that's always the case. I love anything that we do. It's good. It's always respected more somewhere where we live. It's like Jerry Lewis. Yeah. Well, this was... I went to this convention where it seemed like it was at the Pompadou Center in France. And the other stuff that was presenting there were like people who would make demos, which were music files with graphics, like something you'd see

at the beginning of a pirated Commodore 64 game. It was that and they had to get them as small as possible, like 4K or 6K. And I think coming back from that is when we first talked about the left for dead 4K. Left 4K dead? Left 4K dead, that's what it was. It's a 4K version of left for dead. And then it turns out after all those years that was made by notch. Yeah, that's the guy who made minecraft. That was made by notch.

Yeah. Wow, I didn't know that. And that crazy? Yeah, that was crazy. Anyway, so I thought I'm gonna take the train and I'm gonna go over to London because I've never been there before. Hey, I'm going over to London. I'll meet this guy, guy Gavin that I've known for years and I have met in person ever So I'm gonna go over to London so I say Gavin

Hey, do you want to meet we can go have lunch or something? I want to see episode three because it just came out and the star was me I gotta see what it comes out, right? So someone goes to episode three. Do you want to come? He's like absolutely so again on train I know how long was it take I said I'd be there about two I ended up getting into about three and then we're texting back and four trying to coordinate. No, we went we go to lunch Yeah, we were I didn't have your number. I also got to feel numb Smart man guys They try to find each other we finally find each other about like three or four we go we eat at some terrible restaurant I know what it was I tried to get him to do this fire station. It was fire station

I had a fire station converted. I think I got fish in restaurant. I know what it was. I tried to get him. It was fire station. It was fire station. I had a fire station. I think I catch fish in London. It's what I ate. It doesn't matter where you go there. There's no food there. It's terrible. So I tried to get him drinks by telling the waitress. He was my brother that didn't play at all. I think it's about 12. Yeah, he did. And so he was with a friend of his and then we go we leave there. We go to the theater where episode three playing. And I say, okay, I'll buy your ticket to episode three he goes oh don't I've already seen it

and I said oh I thought we're gonna see the movie I didn't know he'd already seen it because why hadn't I go when did you see it he goes I saw it today when I got in so the movie we're gonna go see together Gavin decided to see before I showed up as I was like well I guess I'll go see the movie and you won't he goes okay bye I'll tell you I well, I guess I'll go see the movie and you won't. He goes, okay, bye. Just talk as long with you. That's pretty much it. No, I'll tell you what happened.

Maybe he saw you, got freaked out. And he's like, I'm bailing. That would be a rational explanation for that. Not that we made plans to go see Moody together. And you saw it earlier in the same day. We had plans to go see. What happened is, I was with someone else. You were two, I was was late he was getting impatient and

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait getting impatient. He was like, I'm just gonna go and see it And I was like, oh, well, he's not here yet. And I just went in with him and then you came so we hung up with you and I left Sorry about that. Sorry to inconvenience you. See, he's like, he's like, in the movie as well. I did like, I took him for a sleep though. Episode 3 was terrible. There was Brad Pitt and Sean Penn and I didn't remember the rest. Yeah, my episode 3 pretty much our way he'd given up on it right man If it's like the five-year-old me had seen me falling asleep in a Star Wars movie when I was gonna be what is wrong with you You know in episode three it finally come out after all those years and I go and I like But five year old you'll be also like what else would be like man I can finally drink Why am I not eating seven chocolate bars? Yeah, really are you from breakfast? I remember us.

We were at convention once in a hotel. And we were watching the Darth Vader thing, where that pot opens and closes and he gets interrupted over and over again. And then we flipped on the TV. And Star Wars was on, and it was on that exact moment. It was exactly. It was like literally, we just finished

watching on the computer and it came on on the TV. What are the other units? I think that YouTube video is called Darth Vader is an asshole. That's right. Yeah, and that is a- Oh yeah, you're in trouble to see the guy. He's a funny video. It's very clever. Funny, funny videos. I think that YouTube videos called Darth Vader is an asshole Funny funny video it's one of the best bits of editing. I've ever seen to retell story You've held that again. You've held that over my head for like what seven years. It's made no fucking sense Let me tell you

US to go see a movie with you the day we got to the movie, he sees the movie that day a little earlier. We're done with that. Let me tell you what... Who does that? What doesn't make sense? Do you remember? It was 2007. I just spent about three months in Texas with you, with Rusty. My flight home got cancelled and you didn't tell me.

I didn't know. No, you booked the ticket. We were at Amplifier looking at... Because I'd been, you know, doing conventions and stuff. So you're like, let's go to Amplifier. See what's going on over here. And then you were like, oh, by I'd been you know doing conventions and stuff so you're like let's go let's go down fly see what's going over here and then you like oh by the way you're flight got cancelled I just found out like three hours earlier so I had to leg it to the airport to see if I

could get a different flight to Dallas I couldn't because the last flight had gone I had to fly to LA to go to London I had to fly three hours in the wrong direction to go home thanks Bernie I don't remember all this because I was at Star Wars Wars for the day watching it and didn't you like you had to leave that deal Like you couldn't see it was the thing. It was day 90 of 90 of my visa. I could stay 90 days If I have if you ever stay your visa is big deal You it's very hard to come back after that if you ever stay your visa. I so the last flight out of the United States Was in LA and I had to go there and as I was like it to fly to the worst airport America LAX so as I was boarding the flights LAX the woman on the gate she was like

Don't think I'm gonna make this flight. Oh my god. I'm gonna overstay the visa When we landed when we landed at LAX I just grabbed my bag ran as I was running glanced the board to see where the flight to London Heathrow was, it was said, final boarding, and luckily it was like three gates down. So I was like running, running, running, ran down the jetway onto the plane, sat down, it took off. I think that's the least amount of time I've ever spent it in, it was probably about 20 seconds total

in the airport, which is must be, and we just went. You're an arsehole, I was so stressed. You should be thanking him for that experience That's like having a private jet you get to the airport you walk in the plane the closer door and you take off Yeah, totally if you'd have told me like an hour early. I could go on early a flight to Dallas How I just wait in my problem that they canceled your flight you should try You should be glad that you don't have to share a hotel room with them. You're an adult You're an adult you can manage this stuff on your own.

Did he poop on your bed? Did he like flight had been canceled? Did he poop on your bed? I left like a big poop. He snored into my bread. I don't know. What is the story with this? That he thinks I poop places.

You're turning me into the person who poops. Oh, by the way, it was September 11th as well. I just got to that day. Yeah, like, it was 9-11. 2007. All of a sudden, him saying this makes me realize that why his visa process was so difficult all of a sudden makes sense. When I was flying back from San Francisco the other day, I encountered one of the strangest TSA agents I've ever seen in my life. So I checked in for the flight at San Francisco and the gate agent says, you know, normally this security line is over here, but that line's about a close.

So go over here to your right. And there's another line down there. That's fine. Okay. I walked down there and I get to the line. And this only like five groups of people in front of me, you know, maybe some of them were couples, some of them were people by themselves. I was like, oh, sweet. I'm going to get to this in no time. The agent, like the first person walked up to the agent, the agent grabbed their ID and their boarding pass,

began looking at the ID and repeatedly looking at the ID and looking at the person, like making sure it's them. Then they pulled out like a jeweler's loop and started examining every square inch of the ID on the front. Yeah. I thought, okay, we'll do this. Nope, flipped it over, did the back, every square inch. It's like, what the hell?

Like, the final that person was cleared. Then the next person was a couple, a married couple. They both walk up to the agent and he freaks out. He's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Are you two? You can only come together for your family. And the guy was like, we're married. We have where our family. He's like, no, no, no, if you don't have a kid, you can't come together. You need to go back, sir. He's like, what? I always, he's like, sir, you need to go back, quit being combative. You guys are okay? Okay. You walk back to the front of the line and you go see this whole thing,

and he looks at the idea real close, looks at the woman, looks at the idea, the woman's wearing glasses. They look at her and goes, can you take your glasses off, man? Oh my God. And I was like, what the fuck, really? So she takes her glasses off,

and he's like, and he's still like back and forth, looking at the idea, looking at her, then pulls out the jeweler's loop, looks over every square inch. He's like, okay, you can go ahead. Then the guy comes up, and he needs the guys, like, like the guy you can tell is like obviously kind of upset yeah but trying not to piss this guy off yeah goes the same deal examining every square inch and I thought what the fuck on my license like I don't have facial hairs you gonna make me shave when I get a fucking up and so he went through

like black your face going through like like I said like four people proudly took him about 15 minutes and then after the fourth person another T.S.A. came up and was like hey um you can go Going through like like I said like four people probably took him about 15 minutes And then after the fourth person another TSH came up and was like hey, you can go work the extra machine I got this checkpoint and the guys like no, no, no, I got this I got this and the guys like no, no, no really really Go work the machine. I got I got the checkpoint here and you can see like everyone in the line was like Oh, thank God. We were all dreading getting up. I've never seen anyone like that I hate that It's like the process where you're standing there and they're like look at you and they look at the picture

It's like okay Now we all have to play this game and pretend like you're even actually looking at me. I mean it's just like yeah Also, he made everyone say their name say their name and he repeated it as well like to make sure he could pronounce it So like one person had like The the TSA agent was Asian and this one woman who was Mexican walked up, and her name had like a weird accent to it, and he was like repeating it over and over, like trying to get the pronunciation correct,

and I was like, just move on, dude. Just move on. So that is the guy who's got the dead body stacked up at home. Oh, he's let trust me. And he's let trust me. He's completely crazy and is now incredibly paranoid about it. And I thought maybe that they had like a specific threat that they were guarding against or like

It's like maybe there's like some kind of forged ID thing that they're not telling about the next dude was like any other T.S. Agent. He's like MCID. Yeah, I don't know. Do you ask him? I don't know. No, no, no. I don't want to piss anyone off in that situation. I just want to get through there I just want to get on my plane. Yeah, I just want to do whatever spoken like a good sheep yeah I told you put me on the machine torture me I will believe I will adhere to your beliefs put me in a line and make me wait I whatever you say sir to my shoes off all right you have that you take you take a picture to me sure thing to me put my hands up for you this is where my pockets are empty this is this is what you're describing pretty much is our shorts process. Yeah, no kidding, right? I told you're the only person here that might understand this as well.

I would like to own a pair of shoes for more than a month before they get covered in fake blood. Every pair of shoes I have has fake blood. That's always an amazing thing too, because we always reminisce about this every time we're in line at the TSA agent and we're like, oh, hey, my shoes are covered in fake blood. I'm covered in blood from the ankles down. Yeah, I wouldn't got a shoe shine to the airport. It looked like we've run out of our heads to the body. It looked like a crime scene.

You think the shoe shine guy got in trouble? Like, quite as if somebody bloody rats. I mean, yes, how much you're looking to fix this. And then I truly specifically buying a new pair of sneakers. And then like with and then like a week later blood all over them Yeah blood all over all of our clothes all the time all the time. Why do you and I get covered in blood every show? I don't know you play those fucking agents whatever they are No, but it's across different roles. I mean like we're gonna you're gonna play a teacher and you're gonna teach students And we're gonna be fighting a little scene then I need to get covered

But yeah, no that's pretty much every scene. This scene is you guys holding hands of the field where butterflies fly around and there's bambi at the deer and then you're all like I'm in the elevator from the shining opens up in front of you. In the deer explodes and then your head gets impacted. Then the guy from National Rail gets paid. How much could that guy get paid though? I didn't know. God, you're really, you're really obsessing over that.

Like what, what is the point because like in every job It reaches the point we just get over it. Yeah, some people is some more bothered Yeah, but it's like if you do care at what point are you just like is it the ninth eyeball is it the tenth eyeball? You just anything you can just say anything You can and even if you just even if you adjust anything I mean at what point I mean are there different like body parts who like Are there a different scenario maybe that you're not ready for? I don't know. I don't want to see like some other dudes junk, you know?

It's like what now you get to see some other dudes junk potentially thrown out across Wait a minute. I mean, is he really are you at that level where I want to see a Disjointed human body and you're more worried about seen a dude genitals That's the thing he's been over backwards and they found it in his bum. I don't want to see either Anything the older I get and the more I learn I'm like would I want unlearned I'm going to that immediately like he's scared of seeing another man's genitals That like that's the worst thing that this is for human being and like I saw his generals That's what his brains telling you I don't want to see if you look at the junk you become

If you look at the junk we become gage all You're in your gay neck I don't see any part of it. I don't see anything. There are some things that Co-human bodies such sort of a shock that people vomit instantly. I can't imagine I just smell I can imagine that happening from somebody's season of the guy's junk I don't know how women function That's a completely different conversation now. I don't know how they deal with our crap So I had a really

Pointing with my pen so I know what I'm talking about so I there's something I didn't mean to talk about in the podcast And now that we're talking about gross biological stuff. I want to bring it up. I Experience one of Gus's stinky sneezes. Oh, I don't remember when we talked about the fact that Gus has stinky sneezes It's been a while it's been a long time and I was I don't forget where we were but we were somewhere in close proximity I think we were in Seattle and Gus needs and I'm like, what is that? I go that is a Gus and I'm afraid I have it now You know if he was in England that there would be a guy hired to walk around and pick up everything that well Oh, this never he touches so you experienced it. What is it? I don't know you're gonna die. I don't know

He sees his ever experiences this never he touches so you experienced it what is it I don't know you're gonna die. I don't know he sees is Have you ever experienced this? It's not every sneeze and I have everything I've had one in a couple weeks. We want to get it to a below-take that animal Yes, are you concerned about that? Maybe there's something dying on your and inside your head Can we get some paper trying to leave your signuses? I'm gonna look at see the internet we talked about You know your podcast is a medical term people like I think most doctors don't acknowledge that it's possible But there are some people who say that's possible to have like bacteria in your sinus

We should swap your nasal path Make stinky sneezes, but I never smell it is the thing like if when I'm breathing I don't smell a bad smell But when I sneeze I know it's a stinky sneeze Well, let's go to the best source of knowledge on the internet, Joel. Let's go to Yahoo answers for this. Okay. We talked about this earlier. Yahoo answers has Yahoo answers actually answered anything ever about anything ever in the

history of the world. Yahoo answers should give up and they should just put a button like you know you can share on Twitter and stuff on other sites and like share on Reddit or whatever. Yahoo answer should have a button, share on 4chan. I mean, they should have a button that's like take screenshot of this. Exactly, every subject, every subject on Yahoo answers is exactly the same thing.

You've got one naive idiot who's like posting a legitimate question, and then you have a dude under it going, oh, cookies smell like bubbles. What's the Yahoo answer you see there? Barely Joel's brain has the ability to answer the answer. Open the door. That's right.

Hey, what's where pants? I don't know how you get rid of stinky sneezes and what is it? First answer with the most upvotes is, huh? and what is it? First answer with the most upvotes is, huh? Then Carolyn, who is her credentials or listed here, she's been a nurse for over 24 years. She's never heard of such a thing. And that's it. And then sneezing, that's under wrong diagnosis. Yeah, for some reason lots of people don't believe it exists, but you believe now. Dude, I'm Jeff Belief. I believe. I have experienced the stinky

sneeze and it's weird. It's weird. I think Kerry smelled it once also and he had the same reaction you did where he was afraid that if he smelled it that he was going to have it as well. So he started like covering up his nose and his mouth and running away. Well, because you said your wife called them. You said your wife called them. Yep.

Dude, the next time you have one, yeah really loud. I'll come. I'm going to try and get him. Well, you're here. I'll try to sneeze in my Jacket no go to you know Like look smell in my jacket take take your stuff elsewhere take take the group Over and away gussies got his own sort of biological warfare. Yeah, but it hasn't been in a while now that you mentioned it I maybe a couple months

Well, I'll look forward to the next one. You know, I gotta say, whenever you try to find out information about something on the internet, especially as the internet now, internet's gonna kind of old. Like, yeah, I find this all the time, yeah. It's gonna kind of old. You sort of dismiss stuff, like, if I'm looking for like a technical thing,

and it says like, people are, say, a thousand ten, it's like, oh, that's old as hell. People are, say, a million like, to realize that the internet is no longer, has any answers for them. Yeah, that'll be a time 30 years from now And you'll be pulling up results from like 30 years ago. You're like, whoa, this is really old. They're not like two years old

Yeah, it's like to it's like I love when you see the technical thing. It's like hey my CD drive is not recognized by my Whatever laptop and it says this specific error, which is how you found it right and then you're like yes I mean she told her flies and somebody says you should call support is always the second one And then the third one is the guy who had the original problem going never mind. I fixed it. You're like you mother I Did I tell you what I did recently when I found a post that I posted on a text report from it was about Microsoft word I posted it in 2003 and I said I've got this problem and a guy responded to it like Microsoft Word. I posted it in 2003 and I said, I've got this problem and a guy responded to it like the day after I did it

in 2003, say, why don't you try this? And I just by fluke found this post I made. So I just logged back in and I was like, thanks, I'll try that literally eight years after I just bumped the thread back to the top. And I met, you can imagine people like looking at the thread going, huh? Like an eight year gap between posts and the same Fred is like you had not needed to use the word

I'm saying like oh wait that's probably oh yeah, they have the same word. I'm gonna like words like 2000 I'll try that thanks Did you actually did you apply his knowledge the first time you said it? No, I don't think I even checked I can't remember the issue was oh man. I actually man. I gotta I just fix a problem on my TV issue was oh man I actually man I gotta I just fix a problem on my TV that I have I bought a 3d television Gavin why I had to buy a new TV about a year ago and 3d was just kind of coming around and it was like a hundred extra bucks to get the 3d version and so I thought I wouldn't know I might need it you know so I got it and it's like it's just one of these TVs are so thin now. They're so thin and It's awesome. You get like hanging on the wall and like arm arm on the TV. It's great. I love it

But it did this thing the thing I think I hated about it was not the 3d It's this new mode that TVs have whether 240 hertz That is ridiculous and it makes everything look like a Spanish soap opera but what it is yours doing what some do where it will create it will it will leave the display the same frame twice or it will create one in between no I don't know about that but I can take a plate halo on it and you pan the left and interpolate frames in between yeah exactly like what am I what is this you end up with like movies looking like video like really like high-frame rate videos like this is I just want to throw up I don't know who likes it. I think James Cameron. He loves that stuff

I had a 1080p projector and there's like two different levels of because sometimes on a slow pan He get kind of stuttering in effect with like you know blu-ray and stuff, I guess yeah, huh? But uh when it's Stereo-droid It looks even worse. It looks it looks bizarre So does it do 240 Hertz when you're watching or is it 120 like when you do 3D Is it 220 fields or I haven't watched shit in 3d 1 240? I played Call of Duty black ops in 3d. That was pretty cool I did I got a 3d TV recently also

I tried that out. It makes sense the gaming to me. I don't want you to play a little bit of I played a little bit of Uncharted 3 in 3d Wasn't Halo in a grocery store to be in 3d? Yeah, it was yeah. Wasd yeah was it 3d yeah yeah I saw the tech demo at packs prime Yeah, I should tell you to go back and go Halo 3d and people I've heard a lot of great things about it Jesus last weekend on the podcast that I said I couldn't finish the library in 20 minutes or finish the library without dying Like I can tell you know a real hero but Halo player you suck. I'm like yeah, fuck the news flash. I suck at Halo I thought I already knew that who listens to this guy. You are not a real Halo player Missile I'm not apparently not a real Halo player. You should bring in your 3d TV and play Halo on a best free with me on it Okay, okay, you can watch the Marines dying in 3d and how fucking lanes you how about you come over to my house and play there

Instead of me fucking dragging a TV in so you can play Halo 3d Get off your fucking bum and come over. No, no, he's being careful about that because he knows if he tries to come over to your house This flight's gonna get canceled. He's gonna have to get LAX On that point. There is something depressing about flying over the place you just left six hours ago Yeah, yeah, told me I've done that right where it's like I'm moving like on the first flight It's like well. I'm moving further away. Yeah from my goal right now all this time What are the guys I work with is a wildlife cameraman and he once had to fly to Alice Springs in Australia I think.

But just to save a little bit of money, the production company booked him a connecting flight through somewhere like right on the edge. So he looked out the plane and saw Alice Springs and he was like, it's going to be like nine hours till I get there. Just because someone was too cheap to get a flight straight. So he went over the plane two hours ago, about four hours, waited and came back because there's someone who's too cheap to get a flight straight so he went over the plane to go around about like four hours waited and came back it's just horrible just when you know it's just like I just jump out the plane right now jump let me take my

Harry I did I did so my dog Lincoln passed away I've sucks it was very sad he was a good dog he was a great dog I had a golden retriever named Lincoln and He was a rescue dog and about about eight months ago We found out he started limping one day and we found out that he had can't like bone cancer in his leg It was just awful and so he went down to a three-legged dog See I was trying to get to a happy conversing. We're making it to a happy place We're gonna tip like shows a big decision whether or not to take like Lincoln's leg off his front left leg And it was it always a front leg. Yeah, that's what you think it's worse. Yeah, I think they'd be good power from the back legs

I've seen I know there's a lady somewhere around an Austin that has a three-legged dog And it's I'd sing it. It's just like I don't know if I have heartstrings, but that's the only time of our fellow Joel don't say that you have heartstrings. I think I know So so that's pretty sad, but he lived eight more months after that. So that was great. I mean, that was, it was so good call. It was totally good call, but it may not. Those first couple days were hard.

Yeah, it was really hard. So Lincoln had a passing away. And because we have young kiddos, we decided to get another dog right away, because it was like too hard to like not have a dog around. And you kind of, when the doorbell were no ring, we had this annoying habit that you then missed where he would just bark like an insane maniac every time the doorbell rang. But then the first time doorbell rang was like oh we're all sad because yeah it's weird what you're not missing. Yeah it's weird. Um I wonder what I would miss if I gave it that much. Um I miss Joe the cat. I miss Joe the cat.

I miss the scripts don't get torn to shreds when you like the Joe has gotten more violent I'm telling you I mean Especially we oh Why are you gonna throw the eye? All right, that's Like a dog that walked out of time like that How does it get down with that bangin' it's chin? You think he's been standing up with two legs?

Yeah, for a few years. What up? What's like, when I'm not gonna get that cup again? Man, that's totally amazing. Um, oh, pretty good. That, you know, a three-legged dog is depressing. A two-legged dog is awesome. Something else. That's triumph. That's, that's awesome. A different emotion. I don't know what's happening. All right, well, we need a wrap up Well, so we have a new dog her name is rookie and she is a she's like a really interesting size lab

She's a smaller lab. She's like a medium sized dog. It's funny when I saw her I didn't think of her as being a lab because she's kind of smaller. Mm-hmm. I'm gonna get a dog She's not a small shitty dog like your small shitty dog that you have my 12 dogs awesome. I hate small shitty dogs I'm gonna get a dog. I'm gonna get two dogs. Yes. And then they're gonna come to the office. I'm bringing the office over there.

I'm all for pets in the office. I love that. I really do have a hypocrite. Because I've asked people not to bring their pets to the office. And I brought this dog to the office. Why? Because some people really like their pets. More than other people like their pets.

You know, it's a bad. Also pets are bad for me because I get, you know, as soon as soon as I see it's like you'll turn up with a snake or something. No, no, that's Ruiz a great name for a dog. That's the kids name. You're rookie. I of course wanted to name her What's my dog name that I always try to do? Zazu I've been trying to name a dog Zazu for 20 years now. I'm glad you've been why I don't think I've ever heard of a dog named Rudy. Why would you why would that's a terrible name? What's that name for a bud? I just like it Zazu. I just like the name. What's wrong with it? What the fuck wrong? You guys species terrible terrible terrible name for a bird. What was the name of the bud in line get a ferriter?

You're really terrible naming animals. We didn't work. Yeah. Well Lincoln You know the funny thing is when we got Lincoln He was a rescue dog and he came from another family He was Lincoln like Lincoln Park But he knew the name Lincoln so he changed the Lincoln like So he changed the Lincoln, like the president, like Abraham Lincoln or like the logs or like the logs. Lincoln. Yeah, we changed it to that so that it was seemed to less because I'm just collar actually like L.I. K.I.

And I know that was embarrassing that one day he got away from the office and our neighbors found him. They're like, you looking for Lincoln? Yeah. It's like L.I. and K.I. And it was like, oh, yeah, that's it's actually L.I.N. K.I.N. it was like oh yeah that's it's actually Lincoln yeah we were gonna change it we're gonna change him to LinkedIn but he was actually a useful dog so the bird from liking is does he well done get out of here throw an at Kingston now I can't use the name well I don't know why you'd name a dog I can't use any many we can let me. We do the name from anyway. I don't know. Just made it up.

Maybe just like she based on stealing from Disney. A dog's con get cancer. Wait. God, we got it wrap up. Why you got to throw something like that out? You know sharks don't have bones either. They are all cartilage. They also don't ever fully fall asleep, right?

Some sharks. They found me. They thought that for a long time. And they found these sharks in the Caribbean that are literally laying on the bottom of the ocean So we've established thought that our sharks have to stay in motion those are time but that's not the shark sharks are I'm here, I'm not asleep and they don't sleep That's terrible. That's life's sleep. I wonder how long a shark can live in the wild like what's the lifespan for a great white?

I think they can live thousands of years. No, no, no, no, all the ones I've met. No, thousands of years. It's hard to date after 800 though. That's what I've heard. Like 50 years. We should have 40 years. It's gotta be. Right. So Gavin and I did something really fun. We Gavin, I went out to Eric's birthday party. And yeah, and we saw an original. I'm gonna try to name the year here 1977 print of jaws maybe 76 Where ever you're the joss game? It's funny because what you know original print we're talking about before about the 240 megahertz and seeing additional frames and the more frames you see The worst it looks yes, that must have looked great

Oh shitty so scratching the whole the film with yellow Right, it's like it's like shark's reach Reached maturity at 15 years of age and can have a lifespan of over 30 30 for great white. Okay, so I have another question to ask you so we have a Fosset in the kitchen. Okay, it's a kitchen faucet Which describes what it is and where it is and Okay, it's a kitchen faucet Which describes what it is and where it is and It has two modes on it. It has the regular faucet mode where the water comes out like you would expect like a stream

Then it has the sprayer mode where it comes out out of like 80 different little holes Right like if sometimes you have like a little gun on the side of your sink You pull on the hose and you pull the gun out and you will just watch dishes I can't drink water in the one mode, the spray mode. I can only drink water in the faucet mode. It happens. You spill it all over your cell. Don't you think it, no, don't you think it would have the opinion that if you get the

water out of the faucet in the spray mode, that it would taste different than, yeah, I can see that. I can go like white and bubbly in this. No, I wouldn't drink that. No, it would taste different. It would, yeah, it would taste different. Like if you were getting drunk, you'd sink an old school sink,

and you had the faucet or you had the gun, you wouldn't fill your glass up with the gun. Well, you'd be taking up crap from the bottom of the glass. If it wasn't there, it's there anyway, you're fucking idiot. But you know what I mean? It's different, it feels like it's different water to me, even though it's all the same pipe.

It's like, if I put it out of the gun, that water would taste different than water on the faucet. It's in there. Yeah, but what's the still what wouldn't like just you know disrupt it. You're looking at me like I've got something to kick it up. I'm looking at you like you're crazy. Have you ever in your life gone to the sink and gotten a glass of water from and use the

gun to fill it up? No, but I have used the spray version and I also like that and I didn't bother you. No, but I have used the spray version, and I also like that. And I didn't bother you at all. No, aren't you the kind of person who has to like turn up your TV and volume to five? No, it has to be even. Why? I don't know. I posted that on Twitter once, and everyone said

they did the same thing or they did it in fives. Yes. No one said that they had to have it on odd numbers unless it was a five. Have you ever thought about it ever? I've never done it. But when do you ever adjust the volume by one? Ever.

I don't know. That should be like 10 volume. And then I hate the ones where it's like they have the half. Like if you receiver, it's like 28.5, 29.5, 30. All my receivers are weird. They're all negative. Oh yeah, because it's zero. Because it's indesibles, right?

That's great. But that's the, you can can have negative decibels though. I don't know. Like it starts at negative 40 and you turn it up to zero. Yeah. I don't know what that is. Mine is like that too. I think.

What the fuck is that? I don't know what that is. I don't know what that is. I don't know what that is. I don't know what that is. I don't know what that is. I don't know what that is. Is there like a standard decibel level that you're trying to hit?

I don't know. Yeah, you're like two below that. You can't go above zero. Yeah, I gotta stay between 30 and 16 for most things right I know and 30's quieter all I know is that I know that I really like a video game when I have a certain set level volume for that game Like I know certain games. It's like halo is I'm on 15 if I'm on halo 15 Yeah, I'm called duty that it's 13 if I'm playing again on my Xbox. It's always negative 26. I have to play negative 26 Yeah, why is it negative? Why do they do that? I don't know. It seemed like a weird conspiracy What if I'm watching Netflix like Netflix stuff can very wildly and volume on my Xbox?

I gotta get it. So if you go above one and yeah, I've gotten a positive You can deposit yeah, I got a positive 30 I think I've never listened to anything on positive, but I know it's there What no, I must have a shitty receipt. Bake out. We don't have a Canadian in the mind goes zero zero and stops like Like 30 and then it hits like max max See that's really that's stupid because it's like it's telling you how much higher you go So you should go all of the 30 but you live in the negative 16 range? Yeah negative 16 and negative 30 the fuck are you doing? Wow, you can really blow the shit out of me.

You are a rock star. You're clearly. Okay, we got to end this. See, I have this thing on my speakers. I have these independent theater movie speakers. And if you lift the TV, sit for a while, like somebody calls you or whatever, then the receiver clicks off on the speakers.

So then it's like you got to jab the thing back to life and then wait the three seconds for the receiver to click back on Yeah, you should be able to disable that. That sounds fucking annoying. It's really fucking annoying He's talking about that. I got the full package from time-work and they made him take this phone thing. God damn dude time-warners My I don't have a home phone. No, I mean either. No. Yeah, I don't I don't have it either except for I was forced to do it Because I got the package so I had a weird thing. No, I don't wear thing wear. Hey Joel get a phone Hey, Joel, let's call somebody. You don't think I told a phone.

So I had to do some kind of douchey. It feels douchey at least because we don't have a phone. A home phone. I got my nine year old cell phone. You have a thing man. Yes, it is a love of the heaven thing. Hey Joel, kill me. So I got my nine-year-old a cell phone that seems like too young but Gavin saying it's not no

You get what is he use the cell phone for? You can get like a kid's phone that only accepts calls from like certain allowed numbers It can only make calls to certain numbers, right? You didn't get in one of those did you know we did we restrict it down, but not I mean you know my kid He's like not gonna break the rules. Yeah, I don't worry about him using it for anything He's well not now, but No one is a teenage when they start turn they go I hear they can once he discovers the oh one one international prefix. Oh wow So um, okay, that's it. That's it. No one talking about swear to I swear to God. We're done. We're so thank you for listening.

So I did mention about the beta on Twitter. What are the point of our tx? You're talking about our tx? And now for a bonus interview. Okay, so Jack, we have a special guest with us here today. We do. We have Mr. Paul Moreno, who is the lead cinematics designer over at Bioware, specifically on the older Republic game. That is correct. Which we talk about, I think, about 10 times a week on podcasts these days. Jack, you're playing all the time, right?

Dude, I love Star Wars The Old Republic. I run a guild of about 350 people. Actually, about 375 at this point, and we're doing operations, we're doing in-game stuff. We've got small groups running flashpoints, like non-stop. You've canceled, like, real- life plans to go play that game. What do you mean by real life?

I take offense at that. No, I'm okay. Actually, no, yeah, that's true. I, when Gav got to town, I skipped out ongoing to dinner with Gav because I was running an operation that night. Actually, I joined our main operation group. He's like, that's real. He has dozens of people.

How many people can go into an operation? Operation is 16. 16 people. So we have 16 other people waiting on him. Yeah, I guess nowadays that's more of a better excuse than it used to be Yeah, and also and also the first night that I was like I like I was a backup because I knew I'd be busy every now and then So I this was like the first night. I was officially in the in the in the rating group or the operations group and so Yeah, so I couldn't I couldn't miss out on my first day. So it was a you enjoyed it. I love it man. It's awesome. I mean we've seen I mean we've seen all the in-game stuff like we've run 16 man hard modes up to

Sowa on eternity vault and I think they they ran it up to Karaga and Karaga's palace but both times they couldn't down them in 16 so they split up in eight man and down them in hard-out eight man. So, it's funny, because you can get so advanced in the game, I played this game, and I was just telling these guys earlier on a different podcast that this is a huge milestone for me as a gamer. This is the first MMO I've ever played where now I have a character at the current level cap.

I've never like stuck with one long enough. Thank you, congratulations. Yeah, thanks. It's about four weeks of my life that I think you owe me back in some way. Good to know my wife. That's how you come to say. I'm sorry to your family. What do you guys have in the mail? How long was the development for the game? The element entirely was about six years from from first, you know, the first kind of route of the Genesis of the project and then to release, I believe it was.

I've been on the project about two and a half years, almost three, so. Well, and so just to be clear, what Paul does, old Republic, unlike other MMOs, all the mission quests that you get, they're all in cinematics, they're all full speech, fully animated cinematics, and in other games, it's just sometimes just text, you know.

And so that's, we were talking about this earlier, how much cinematics do you think it is in total? Yeah, it's hard to say. I mean, there's about 250,000 lines of dialogue in the game itself. And if I recall correctly, Mass Effect 2 is probably about an order of like 35,000 lines. And then that came out to about 24 hours of cinematic content.

Right, yeah. I should make a calculation from that. And you guys have made like new technologies to actually pull in audio and animate mouse and stuff, right? Or is that all hand done? That's all, I mean, lip sync technology is there. I mean, Mass Effect has that, you know, just over public has that.

So thankfully we're not, you know, hand-editing that stuff. That lot of fun been working on it. Yeah, we've been working with Paul for years, or if not working directly, at least working in the same area as Paul, because I think I told the story before where we started making red versus blue back in 2002, 2003, and we were like, hey, this is great. We're being able to use video games to make movies, how super efficient. And then we got a phone call one day where somebody said, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, 2003. And we were like, hey, this is great. We were able to use video games to make movies, how super efficient. And then we got a phone call one day where somebody said, what you're doing has a name called machinima. That's a little bit of a simplification of actually what we were doing.

They actually were the way that story worked. But that phone call was essentially Paul Marino where Paul was the head of the Academy of Machinima Arts and Sciences. And he called us one day to tell us that there was this awards ceremony coming up and we were being nominated for it, or if we wanted to submit for nomination. Right, right, exactly. Yeah, so it's been that long, it's been nine years. Nine years. You'll be our ninth anniversary on April 1st. That's crazy. Yeah, it's been crazy. That's crazy. That's crazy. That's the anniversary ever April 1st. Yeah, oh yeah, yeah.

Because no one ever believes that every time we do anything for anniversary or now something they're like yeah. Yeah. Sure. Yeah. Look at the calendar, dude. Rich. Yo. Man. You know what? These we love on the podcast is we love everyone's has an internet voice that they you know, it always your internet voice. Everyone's got one. It's always lower. Jaded and sarcastic. Oh,, good job. Yeah, nice job, man. And it comes with a furious tapping of keys, along with it. So you've seen this game pretty much not a star. Can we get back into Star Wars? Do you want to keep talking machine-a-must-up?

Well, as you say, we come a long way with this. I mean, like, so a lot of the technologies that Paul is using, we've talked about theoretically for years and years. Like, we have real-time sirens that go by. We'll catch that. I mean, we first started like lip syncing was a huge deal. Paul was one of the first people to use valves source engine and use the lip sync and was it hammer? A face poser. Face poser.

Face poser inside of hammer. And he is a really popular YouTube video which is G-man singing. It's a two, still seen brine as, is what it is. Yeah, that was named in the piece. It was through a Breaking Benjamin song. And it was just me playing around with it. Like they had just released the tools and I was like, hey, what can I do with this? And and that pretty much was the genesis for that, you know, that little music video. So yeah, it's basically one dude in a living room in New York producing three minutes of facial animation. That's right.

Yeah, they had like a, it was really down pat too. Like, it was very similar to a lot of technologies that are like this now where it's just, you know, you feed it the way file and you feed it, the textual information as well. And it'll do an analysis of how the lipstick actually works. And I basically just sang the song, much to the chagrin of, of course I was living

with at the time. And they, and then based on that, I obviously got the lip sync information together based on my singing the song, and then replaced it with the actual song itself. That's awesome. Yeah. It's amazing the kind of stuff that comes out of someone's

like house. I mean, Monty, he's the same sort of deal where he just made, he made Haloid in his living room, right? Right. And it's just like, man, screw it around. I think it worked like John, but you saw something you need to go home afterwards. But yeah, Paul's worked in design for long time.

I think Paul was instrumental in getting Gavin here because we had to, for Gavin's visa, we had to get testimonials. That's right. And Paul was one of our heavy hitters. Paul is, you know, Paul's an Emmy award winner. Did you know that? Really? Yes.

I did not know that. Congratulations. Thank you very much. And your Emmy's for broadcast design work that I did for Turner broadcasting years and years. So all you need now is a Grammy Oscar in Tony. That's right. I'm still on deck. You're on your way. You can E.Gott.

Well, what's the big video game award? I don't think the Spike Video Games award qualify in that what it would be a quenfecta. I think honestly, I think the Spike TV awards are probably the biggest gaming award. I mean, GDC Awards might be a little more prestigious. Well, there's that and there's also the, which will be called the Academy of Interactive Arts and are probably the biggest gaming award. I mean, GDC awards might be a little more prestigious. Oh, there's that. And there's also the, uh, the, which called the Academy of Interactive

Arts and Sciences, uh, the awards at DICE that take place every day. Oh, right. There's one that comes, it just came up recently too. The BASTA. The BASTA. Oh, right. The BASTA awards as well. Yeah. That's the British one, right? That's correct. Not to take anything away from the VGA's. Or the, or the, no, no, no, nothing. Or the Ristartee's podcast. Exactly. right and so it's how did so you guys came out at the end of 2011 you guys launched a little republic then do you ever consider that for awards because I know it's a huge deal in movies in Hollywood when you're releasing but you guys are more geared on the sales and Hollywood or excuse me the

holiday season right I mean you know obviously, the getting the awards is always kind of a nice cherry on top of the cake kind of thing. But we're not, you know, we're not trying to, you know, it's not positioning about that. It's more about making sure that we have a service that's going live that's solid and making sure that the players have something that they're going to be able to play, you know, for days on end. And so it's really driven by that more than anything that's like trying to get accolades or any of that nature. So yeah, and it's a lot different too, as far as the timing goes. I mean, we were playing Star Wars six months before release

in beta, you know, just through friends and stuff. And it's really neat to see sort of steps of progression, how things would get better slowly over time, even now with the game being out, it's a kind of game where you can keep tweaking it and keep refining it, and there's patches pretty much every week that kind of refine stuff.

And I love that about MMOs. I love that they're always changing. They're like this living digital documents that can always be moved and added on to. Like you guys already added on a brand new flashpoint, the Kion flashpoint, which is awesome. Have you played that one, Bernie? No, just make me a little bit,

look at your Paul, he's like, yeah, I'm still working. That's the case, that's the thing. Working on new content all the time. So there's this new flashpoint called Kion under siege, and it's basically, it's pretty much like left for dead in Star Wars. It's the Rackles, right? Yeah, it's Rackles, like infested Rackles,

and it's awesome. Did you guys create that? That's the Rackles? I mean, that's a new thing you added to the cannon. Well no that made that one came with that was in the Knights of the Old Republic so okay that just carries over from our original original stories. I played the first Knights of the Old Republic and then I said it has played so long ago I I was gonna go back and play them both before and actually I have a 10-year-old that plays with me and so I sat there and watched him playing

Night's the old public the first one. So it was actually kind of hard to go out and find it, you know To get on Mac is where he played it. Yeah, cool. Yeah So night's the old Republic one and two take place like what 300 years before old Republic I think something like that I forget the actual timeline. Yeah, that's that kicks off beforehand But yeah, no no four old Republic before, no, no, no spoilers. But there are stuff that there's stuff that carries over from Knights, the Old Republic that you will see in the Old Republic, MMO, some flash points specifically and some characters that's, it's pretty cool. Like there's some really, really fun characters that made it make appearances that, you know, I was very excited when I saw some certain characters. Old Republic, the Knights of the Old Republic,

the original game, that series has one of the quintessential story moments in it that if you're a gamer at that time, you had to play and everybody knows that one. And it's one of the things it's hard to, it's not like, necessarily old movies, it's like, you know, go back and watch a classic film invest an hour and a half and doing it.

To tell someone, hey, go back and invest 60 hours, you're really gonna like this one part of the story. You know hey, go back and invest 60 hours, you're really going to like this one part of the story. Right. It's hard, but it really is worth it if you can go back and find the game and play it. Well, that's always great. I mean, even like, like, red dead redemption, there are certain scenes in there that I'm like, oh my god, like, you know, simple stuff, but it's like, that's really, really cool.

Even like, like, Call of Duty Modern Warfare, like, when the nuke goes off, that was something that I've never experienced before. And if you get a video game, you can pull that off. Spoiler. Yeah, seriously. It's like four years old at this point. But I mean, if a video game can pull that sort of epic story moment off, that's incredible. And everything I've done in old republics is great too.

All of the animations and stuff are really, really cool. Certain moments, they really key you in on things and it's pretty badass. I'm so glad I chose Smuggler. I've had so much fun with that story line. That's one of my favorite classes. I'm a big gun class. Republic scum. But I'll play Smuggler and Trooper and Agent and Bounty Hunter. Yeah, I roll the Bounty Hunter.

That's my favorite character. That's my other class. But that's a level 10 versus a level 50. So I'm probably going to go back and figure something else. I probably might play Imperial Agent. Yeah. That, that's one of my favorites for the lines really agent Yeah, okay be a sniper or something. I don't know. Yeah, is that the Class of sniper and what else like I should be writing this down? I forget what the is a lot. Yeah

Sniper and not operative. Yeah, that's right operative. Yeah, so It's I mean I love so, I love that. I mean, you know, people, like the people are like sort of really refined what kind of character you want, because each character class has two advanced classes, and then there's three skill trees on top of that. So really, there's like six different characters you can make out of one starting point. And damn it, you know, I mean, it's like every time you assign a point to the skill tree, it's such a huge decision.

Oh, yeah. It's a fearful thing about me in there It's like I'm doing the wrong thing. I know I'm doing the wrong thing and then you church you actually made the button called commit It's literally isn't just okay or except it's commit You know emotional engaging is just the story it's also in the interface It's like my hands Final answer I know you can pay to have it I was like, my hands are like, oh, do I really like it? Can I commit to this? No, no. You are a final answer.

I know you can pay to have it. I don't even know where you go to pay to get your skill tree wipes because I've seen it someplace. You capital city. So I think course on through Drom and Coss. Rubble, republic fleet for me? No, no, actually it'd be course on it. Yeah, that course.

Oh, course on, does it? Okay. And then Drom and Coss are like the marketing area, or the market area. There's a guy you can reset all your skills for. Hey, baby, why are you skill tree wiped? That's right. Yeah. It goes up to you, it's a little more time. The person's free. Hey, baby, why are you skilled? Are you right? That's right. It goes up to you.

It's a little more time. First, I'm free. And then it's like, I'm from there. So you guys are working on the animation. I mean, I'm assuming you're working on stuff that's not out yet, right? And we won't get into specifics, but you are working on future content. That's correct.

I cannot get into specifics. We are working on future content. That's all set. Very well set. All right. Well, let me go to the rest of my questions. All right, I'll be over here if you need me for anything. It's funny when you were talking about the beta earlier. So I was, I initially started playing with my 10 year old son, JD.

And we actually got to be in a testimonial video, which may I think might be yours isn't up yet. Actually, I got to be in that one too. There's two that have gone up so far. One's about story, and then there's another one I think about. Characters or something or guilds. And so I'm in those two, but yours is coming I think maybe there's a question too is like because it's teen rated game and so JD's time But I play it with them, you know, you know with him and those two it's like you have to be careful about what they

Supposed to but better than team speak. Yeah, you know something like that. I can't read mom. You got a high general chat Don't let them look at that stuff, but the uh, so he was part of the beta because it was like a big deal Hey, you want to see this early? And he's like, wow, he's still fascinated by all that stuff. And so we played for a while. And then I had to inform him what a character wipe is when they had to wipe all the characters. Oh, my God. So he was like, oh boy.

He was like, level 11. He's like, they're doing what? I go, yeah, they're just going to have to wipe all the characters when we set it. He goes, why? And I said, well, the game's about to come out. And if they let everyone who played the beta just have the same characters, it won't be fair because they all started

level 11 he's like yeah it wouldn't be fair but I don't really care about fairness when you're on the unfair side it's like it's actually kind of cool you know not being fair were you there for the the final wipe all yeah yeah like were you dancing in court I wasn't dancing I take that back I wasn't actually in the server Okay, the white but I did see the dance videos people are gone together and yeah, so jump off the Yeah, so the republics went also a side all and then the Empire guys all we all got naked and dancing like it's you know Yeah, it's pretty funny. Is there any footage of this on YouTube? Oh, yeah, it exists It's funny like so I always roll female characters whenever I play video games

So of course, I've got this one girl, you know dancing and it brought underwear on this counter top whatever and so like photos came out It turns out it happened to be our server we were on and like people are like highlighting my character dancing around That's pretty cool. So you always roll female character always roll females. You want to talk about it? No I enjoy watching a female running around as opposed to watching a dude running around. I see Okay, that's just me though. Fair, fair, not actually. I will say whoever did the voice of the female bounty hunter is awesome. Like they nailed that character. That's one thing too.

It's like, I mean, like Lacey Shabair is as Meko who's the, who's one of your companions and for the, is the, is the, is that totally makes sense? Yeah. And like in a stuff like that, it's like you don't even think about who it is, but it's like, man, this is a really cool person. You look at him. Oh my god. This Lacey Shabair. She was a mean girl. And a party of five, I think. Yeah, it's like you don't even think about who it is, but it's like, man, this is a really cool person. You look at it, it's like, oh my god, this is Lacey Shabair, she was in Mean Girls and I partied five, I think. Yeah, she's a great boy.

And we have Jennifer Hell as our trooper, so that's another thing that's just, I mean, she's just a tremendous voice actress. Yeah, but I mean, it's like, you know, you'd think after some time, you kind of tired of like, you kind of want to space bar through some stuff and skip it, but it's like, you never, I never hit that point. I always wanted to, you know, watch these things even just like picking up a collection quest. I'm like, I still want to hear this character talk and like the little, you know, nuances of my character. And that's something you don't really experience in other MMOs.

Well, the Star Wars franchise in general, just for franchises and entertainment, it has a high degree of ownership by the audience. Like, it's very personal to them, you know, and BioWare already does that, like you look at Mass Effect, you guys made a big commitment that Shepherd was going to be whatever. The person decided Shepherd was going to look like, female male and then customize. So that kind of makes your boxes and your branding a little bit more difficult. And when I see videos that other people post on YouTube or like when I watch you play, I have a female bounty hunter as well. So here, my bounty hunter's

voice coming out of your character, I'm like, that's not right. Yeah. You know, it's like, you have a very star wars reaction to it. I'm like, I don't approve of that. So even when you grew up up like flashpoints and you run into someone else who has the same, you know, character type, it's like, it's so weird, you know, yeah. So just getting my social points. Somebody please explain to me how I'm supposed to get to social level four.

Because I'm level 50. I'm at social level two. Run flashpoints like crazy. If you're running with JD, I'm at social level two. Run flashpoints like crazy. If you're running with JD, anyway, you guys should be playing like crazy. Yeah, we tend not to group up with other people. We tend to like, you know, father and son just going to play together. But even then, we don't do a lot of heroic fours and we don't do a lot of flashpoints. But even if you're just running like Quest together, I mean, you should be getting,

you should be getting social points. I think I just hit social two. And so. Yeah, it's me too. Yeah, I'm like a social two and midway through. But I'm 100% light almost. Oh, yeah. I got to find some places to get some more light points. Yeah, I'm like a social to and midway through but I'm a hundred percent light almost Oh, yeah, I gotta run to find some places to get some more light points. Yeah, I'm almost dark almost full dark Light side smuggler, huh? Yeah, well I'm playing with kids

And he it's great because it's fun to watch a kid play and He's like whenever he watches me play and it's like the smuggler there's all those flirt options and he's like I see that He's like forget that and then also He's exactly so that stage and when a moral choice comes up he can always uses the good thing He won't like do anything mean or cruel. There's some people who play like that like when I play a character in any game I can't be evil. I can't pick pocket. I can't steal, I just can't do it. It's like a moral issue that I have. I'm gonna say more. Yeah?

So when I was in general chat when I was playing in the beta, I was in the, what's the hut, we're the first thing for the bounty hunter, we're in a hut on, is it New York? Yeah. And so many general chaters goes, dude, I just shot our guy in front of his kids. I don't know how I feel about that.

And I was like, I remember that choice, and I didn't choose to do that. You know, the guy went to me, but he was having a moral dilemma, like a moment of clarity there on general chat. You'll find the most interesting stuff on the, you know, the polar opposite. So you play Jedi and Dark Side Jedi,

or you play a Jedi at Leans towards the Dark Side. Or you play a smuggle that Leans towards the Dark Side, or conversely an agent that leads towards the dark side. Oh, you play a smuggle that lean towards the dark side or a conversely an agent that leads towards the light side. And there's a lot of interesting stuff that goes on there. I tend to play my agent towards the light side. And it's really interesting to see the dynamic of like, you're playing this really dark character and all of a sudden they're doing something that really kind of goes against the grain of the story itself,

but it's a lot of interesting stuff comes out of that. So I was giving away too much. There's also gear that requires you to be light-side or far-side. Right, right, right. You know, if you're in a guild of nothing but Sith, you know, jerks, and you roll light-side, it's like, oh, you know, no one else is going to be going for that gear. Oh, that's even more like the relics if they show up or something like that. That's really interesting.

I never thought about that. Yeah, you can suddenly qualify for a guild, nobody else. I would say there's nothing better than going to a flashpoint And when it pops up like a choice like you know kill the captain or let him survive or whatever and everyone else rolls The opposite of you and you win. That's the best Nice. I would murder the guy and everyone else like no Because in a party what happens is you all choose something and then it does a role It's a random role on each character. And then whoever gets the role, that's what it shows to everybody.

Yeah, that's right. In some cases, choose the paths you're going to take from that point on. Oh, the subsequent choices. I see what you're saying. Yeah. Like Black Talent, which is the Empire's first flashpoint. There's literally a split where it's like you kill this guy or you let him live. And depending on what you do, things are different. Oh, that's true. So you find a different boss base. Well, that's kind of cool in the sense that you still get your dark side points But then you get to see the other storyline too

If you don't you don't win the role. Yeah, you still get your dark side points if you selected that right? That's correct. Yeah Well Paul, we have had a ton of fun with the game And we appreciate your long hour Time away from your family and Anyway, thanks for stopping my coming to see us. Sure. And hopefully, hopefully, when you stuff comes out,

you can combine in. Yeah, I'd love to. So older publics out now will go pick it up and buy it. If you want to join the drug tanks, which is the Sith Guild of the, I guess, the official restricting Sith Guild, you can join us. We're on the Shadowlands server. OK.

Drop in Shalong. Yes, you can help me get my money under best. You're the 10. Absolutely. I would appreciate it. Cool. Nice. Thank you. All right. Thank you. Thanks for having me. Yes, you can help me get my money under pressure. I would appreciate it. Thanks Paul. Thanks for having me. Describe the show to a newcomer in a more familiar way. Do you like apples?

Example. Together in Trempit hosts Characombs. Characombs are free of ideas of nothing to do with this podcast. Analyze various unsolved and rooster teeth cryptic podcasts. F**k face. Call to action. Feel free to add something show premise specific, but short. Listen to show name on Apple Spotify or wherever you get podcasts.

It's f**k face, a podcast. Subscribe or no. You do yes? Subscribe or no, you do yes?