Rooster Teeth Podcast - RT Podcast #238

Episode Date: October 1, 2013

RT Discusses Sex Ed Class Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's time to put your pedal to the metal. From the twisted minds behind Deadpool and Zombieland, an executive producers will learn that an Anthony Mackie comes a new Peacock original series, Twisted Metal, a high-octane action comedy based on the classic video game series. Anthony Mackie stars as John Doe, a motormouth outsider who must deliver a mysterious package across a post-apocalyptic wasteland. If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnett, and Thomas Hayden Church. Twisted metal, streaming now, only on peacock. This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. The internet's leading provider of audiobooks with more than 150,000 downloadable titles

across all types of literature, including fiction, nonfiction, and periodicals. For free audiobook of your choice, go to audiblepodcast.com slash RT. That's audiblepodcast.com slash RT. That's audiblepodcast.com slash RT. This episode of the Ristief Podcast is also brought to you by Shadow Warrior, a bold reimagining of the classic first person shooter from Flying Wild Hog and the Baldur Digital. We're going to cut on into a gunfight as low-wing clashes with the accuser that betrayed him and the demonic forces held it on destroying our. Available now on Steam, GOG, Get Games, and the Humble Store. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪

Hey everyone, welcome to the Root Steve Podcast. Hey! Alright, we got Gus, Gavin, Michael, Lindsay, and Gus. It's a combination of all two of us. Gus, why is he so surprised? It has never happened. Really? No, it's never happened.

It's been a long time since Lindsay's been on the podcast. True, true. I think the last time I was on it was before we did the video podcast, we were still in the conference room. Yeah, but when you yeah, before you started like helping read the podcast and I didn't even do it. I didn't know. I'm talking straight. Somehow she started going on anyway, Gus. You had a good streak going. Yeah. Yeah. There was also a debate beforehand where everyone would sit and specifically I knew Michael would want us to take Gavin and vice versa. And while we were setting up, they were

like, oh, Michael should have this to to take Gavin and vice versa. And while we were setting up, they were like, oh, Michael should have this chair. And I came over to the chief hunter office, I was like, okay, just let you know. They're trying to split you guys up. I'm not gonna see anything, but, no, no, no, that happened. Patrick's like, all right, if you wanna sit here,

I was like, that's like, that's like, I'm gonna catch. Right now, there's a pillow between you, see? We'll get closer as the night goes on. It's true. And you'll start shaking your legs at the same time. We'll all those pillows end up back on the couch every fucking year.

I don't know your charges Every decorations I'm not charged with the shit anymore You're charged with a podcast I literally sit down and they put an iPad in a beer in my hand So like, let's do this What does he say in a long came poll? Gavin the world's a purely decorative

Hang on no purpose We got one We got one Gavin my ideas fell out Michael got a new taste You got a taste? Oh. I'm my very first ever No, cuz I didn't set it up yet Everyone's here now assaulting me Jordan assault me the second Jordan's like do it give me give me give me give me give me

I'm like I didn't do it yet, and I've had like three people be like don't do it don't get sucked in JJ was asking me I don't know what to do yet. I guess after last week's podcast. I ran I was talking with JJ here a little while ago He's like is raise street walker just like little race still street like his what? Oh my god, he's thing on the 3ds. Yeah Like yes, I'm told he's gonna call it sounds like a personally played jiggle or something like you'll read you want to Put your street walker just like a little feet walker Yeah, cool cool just like his Like his beauty I'll show you the steps baby

You're cake. Yeah, do you the steps, baby. Beauty. Beauty. Yeah. Did everyone loves a good beauty? Oh, JJ. So he's like almost there. Who'll get there? It just, it just tells you everything. It's a little more clear.

It says Gavin free. So we'll get in one day. One day I'll understand. So you, so last night, I mean, no spoilers, real talk here. Last night was a Breaking Bad Finale. BB, they also had Gibrone. And you sent out a tweet that was just something super plain like Thanks to breaking bad for being an awesome. It was a nice tweet

It was like I got retweeted like 600 fucking times and I You didn't think it was like Gavin could tweet I breathe air and it would get retweeted a thousand times Yeah, I would Gavin could tweet, I breathe air. And it would get retweeted a thousand times. Yeah, it would. I'm gonna do it. It would. Do you know how many people that personally asked me or tweeted me for a picture of Gavin's nose? Just that.

Just like, hey, can you take a picture of him? Right now that has 1,040 retweets. That's a fucking awesome. I'm gonna tweet, I breathe air. Yeah, absolutely. I was sent you that text saying that you could do that. And Esther was watching me type it. And she looked on my phone,

you can't see it from here, but she's like, why do you have a picture of your own nose in your phone? Is that the one I sent you on the dollar? Gavin will always do that. He'll like take a picture of you or be like, this is what I do. If I'm bored, I will zoom in the camera because it looks really crap on my phone. I'll zoom it in all the way, take a picture of someone and then take that picture and zoom that in all the way and then take a screenshot and send it

to someone. So it's like double zoom of your nose. Yeah, so it's like a picture of this part of my face. Alright, right, right, we're gonna be next to you. There's some green, like amorphic blob in front of you. What? In the picture, there's something green in front of your lips. Like super zoomed in.

I'm gonna tweet this right now. So got this from Gavin. Same day. Same day. He did the exact same thing to me. It's a super zoomed in picture of my face. Like when was it? He's like like five minutes ago. It lost these lost the shit. That's where Gavin's got it. It does. It doesn't make him excited. What was it? Like photo bomb selfies where people don't expect that you took a selfie of them and they're like how did you get that photo? But it's like dead on in front of your face. Like you are taking the selfie of yourself. Oh yeah.

Yeah. I get it. She said you're the one who thought of it. Yeah. I just didn't understand what she was saying for like 10 seconds. But now you're agreeing. Oh yeah. Now I get it.

It's so good. It's kind of. I understand it completely. Look how weird we're to say it right? I get it. Yeah. The way it was presented I guess Gavin was totally blackout drunk or something when it happened, but I also tried to start anything that was going to do called my drink

your crotch.com where I would be drunk holding a drink and I would just take pictures of people's dicks and I said, what would I do with the drink? I just might drink will be in the picture with it. How would I drink that? I did once, but Joel. All right, how's that going? Did it get a good response? How many retweets did it get? I don't know. I didn't think I'd be able to do it. Do you put the dick in the drink?

I'm getting retweeted now. Oh. I like my followers. They're so good. Tweet like a period. That's it. Just like a one. I mean, like a full stop.

Yes. Yeah. I really liked our live Gavin or Google with the audience interaction last week at the speed. That's great. I had a lot of fun doing that live podcast. I guess we should clarify what happened because there were some technical issues with that podcast. At the beginning of the show, we started the, you know, before the podcast starts, we'll typically play some music or something. We'll show like a camera. If you watch the

livestream, you either the camera of us goofing around at a control room and whatnot We were doing that the theater, but we didn't realize that the theater was playing music in the venue Yeah, so that was going out over the stream So YouTube cut off the stream literally right as we went live and that's why I like the first 10 minutes of missing Right, so then Adam had to like because it crashed our streaming software Right then Adam had to like rewrite the website so people could watch it on you stream instead of YouTube He like got up out of the audience and then disappear That's why I don't know if you noticed during the livestream I keep looking over my shoulder so I'm looking to see these back in the seat yet to see you fix the problem

You mentioned you like you point at him and he's and then you like oh, I guess he's fixing something Yeah, so that that's what was going on Same thing happened to Michael when in his videos Didn't you take a video that was in Applebee's before you were to research on his own channel But you said there was music in the background so YouTube was like, oh, sorry. Can't do that. Well that's how you see work Seriously, I'm aware, but it's fairly good. I think it ruins the illusion It's a couple that is you don't raise points that you know everybody knows already. I'm trying to further along the story Dude, you guys are gonna be married. It's true. I picked out addresses. We can so weird not the dress thing

Just no, I mean I was a weird Have you have you said when when the wedding is yet. We're getting married May 9th of next year. Oh wow 2014 we hadn't said a specific date. There it is. Yeah, just said it. Yeah World exclusive it's true None of you are invited to everyone listening do not come Yeah, it is weird. It's weird every now and then, especially with planning. I mean, to be quite honest, a lot of planning is me, which is fine. And Michael throwing like, yeah, good job every now and then.

You come to me with decisions like this or this. I'll point at something. I do like the trifle, like the science project kids have from fourth grade. I'm like, if you'll see here, this color pattern is fantastic. So, Michael, do not answer Lindsey. How snap. What's that?

What are the colors for your wedding? Right now, I think we're on red and yellow. It's true. Wow. Poppy red and a nice gold. It's a summer time. Poppy red tea. Yeah.

I'm sorry. Sorry, sorry. And so yeah, that's a good look. That's what I did. No, I did say because there was a bunch of options on the table and I said to you before she even got to it I said no matter what and no matter what it looks like we're not doing red and blue We're not gonna do that and when he said that I crossed two combinations off the That's a good point like fuck that no, we're not gonna have like fucking green

What's that no, I think black and green? Yeah, you already got red and yellow just fucking throw a little bit of black Accent We have that or wedding. I do our yellow is way class here. Okay. This is more of a gold. Yeah, let's just get married on the set Gus didn't you hear it's poppy, okay poppy red poppy and poppy yellow something Yeah, so some colors some shit. I think guys okay if I get really drunk at you That's the point Gavin Gavin. And really silly. Yeah. We've specifically made sure that it's an open bar

at the wedding. Nice to meet you. Yeah, that's one of our higher priorities, really. We need people to be drunk and happy. True. Especially on both sides of our family. People are going to want to be drunk. Do I have to get you a gift?

Yes. You should. What do you want? Well, that's what you're probably going to do. That's actually the great thing about a wedding. The gift of friendship. There's a registry. You don't have to think about it. Yeah. You just go go to a website. You're like this. This is so easy

Yeah, three gifts or whatever Price ring your a bitch fucking getting through gifts Yeah, well not you know, you know, you know that well Gus he's gonna come to the wedding get him the gift He's in the wedding party. He's gonna be a gift He's only gonna writing party. He's only going to be a groom's man. Hey, that's important. Matt never bought me a wedding present.

Really? Mad. He went to the wedding. I'll call out right now. He went to the wedding, too. Yeah. I thought he might have watched him as a hard cast. Go. Pretty filthy. I remember seven years later, seven years later. And I remember every night. I don't forget a thing like that. It was a good breaking into his house and stewing the gift that you go to him. Yeah, I did that for I don't forget I think like that. Do you have a ticket breaking into his house and stealing the gift that you go hit?

Yeah, I did that for the fun then I did it so oh, yeah, there you go What did you get yourself? It was so confused when you got him as gift and he's like what you're like all exactly that I got him a pair of scissors That hold a slice of pizza so you know It comes out. I don't I guess it dude trust me. It's gonna be awesome That's what's another great thing about like making a registry when you're getting married is like you just pick all these ridiculous things You would never buy and be like someone someone a bad for me. Yeah, I put a fucking deep fryer I'm a

Someone bought it damn dang Goddard's like yeah, I think when he gave it to me It's like I just like the idea of you on your honeymoon like if you're bed naked make it fried chicken I think when he gave it to me, I just like the idea of you going on your honeymoon, like if you're bed naked, make it fried chicken. I think when he gave it to me, he's like, I just like the idea of you going on your honeymoon, like if you're bed naked, make it fried chicken.

I think when he gave it to me, he's like, I just like the idea of you going on your honeymoon, like if you're bed naked, make it fried chicken. I think when he gave it to me, he's like, I just like the idea of you going on your honeymoon, like if you're bed naked, make it fried chicken. I think when he gave it to me, he's like, I just like the idea of you going on your honeymoon,

like if you're bed naked, make it fried chicken. I think when he gave it to me, he's like, I just like the idea of you going on your honeymoon, like if you're bed naked, make it fried chicken. It now has over a thousand retweets fast. That's that's not as molded as I did last night. That's crazy So yeah, what did that take like less than 10 minutes? Yeah, no bad Have you ever done it? We're like you don't necessarily tell someone to get you a certain gift, but you kind of like Imply you'd like that or something or maybe they already got your gift and you change it somehow so that you get the gift You want no, I'm not that old. No, like what? Like, I don't know. Someone buys you a shirt and you're like, ah, that's really nice. It's cool, but it doesn't look good on my body or something.

Just because you really don't like the shirt and you pre-gift gift. Yeah, someone gives you a gift. If they're not like a piece of shit, they should give you a gift receipt. So if you don't like it, you can bring it back. Yeah, I've almost never gotten a receipt for any gift. That's crazy.

Because I'm just giving you give crazy place a hundred bucks You should give us more than that, but yeah, the comment you spend on a wedding. Uh-huh. It depends how nice it is It depends how close you are also with your friend traditionally You're supposed to give a hundred dollars to pay for your meal But that doesn't mean shit if it costs $200 a meal. You're supposed to cover your meal is what the tradition is What if I cover your own meal? cover your meal is what the tradition is. What if I cover your own meal? What if I just get a salad?

If I just get a salad, come into my life. You get one dollar timer. You're getting everything. Whether you eat it or not, okay? That's true. You can take it home and save it for later. We haven't discussing how weird it's gonna be to have his family, my family, and then rooster teeth.

It's like here, you can be free. It's gonna be like a third. You could see all the receipt people in the aisle it's like in the middle like not really for the any better reason I bet you never thought when you used to watch recities stuff I didn't that they don't be it your god damn way I didn't think about that when I first saw the red versus blue like boy I can't wait to see Simmons really drunk and falling down and having that view that sounds awesome oh Gavin oh Gavin hit the beer and he made a mess

I let you do that got his face and then you just kicked over your red bull. I don't know if it's empty or not Yeah, don't get on my hat and don't get on my desk. He dropped it drop the beer Because the condensation damn isn't that your first beer? Yeah, I think you're Gavin. We've had enough. Okay. He's bummed the beer? Yeah, I think you're Gavin. We've had enough. Okay, he's bumming. Oh my god. My crass. Just taking a nap on the couch. Calm down. He spilled on the couch. Gosh, just looks fucking annoyed. I can't believe you did that. How much beer has already been spilled on this couch? We've been doing the, I just thought about it. This might be like the one you're anniversary of the video podcast. It happened in September. Oh, it's September 1. It's September 1. Yeah, it's October 1.. That was a different one. Yeah, it's Amber's turn. Yeah, it's Amber's turn.

Yeah, it's Amber's turn. Yeah, it's Amber's turn. Hey, I think we win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it.

We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it.

We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. We win a year with that stone down on the couch and you fucking did it. Another person I want a new couch to Carol let's find one get a love seat We'll see like we're still kind of in flux. I don't know if we're gonna keep these microphones or if we're gonna go back to the Hydraulics Oh for the couch. Yeah You can't get hydraulics in GTA 5 you can only like get a lower suspension Did you get them in GTA 4? I don't know. Why can't you get hydraulics in GTA games?

Yeah, I would do it. I Would totally get like if you could like hit a button and then you can act your right stick then activates your hydraulics Yeah, that would be cool. I would totally do that. Oh, one so then you would never use it in online You would use that one time. Oh, I just a pick up women. Yeah, they're just me like in GTA online You're like, what's up guys? Joseph my bouncy car. I just need just to show off. It's there's no function at all. I thought I thought she's stuck in the up Subgraphics I'm guys and check out my car. I was the other day like I wish every special TV

It could do the thing that's supposed to do in GTA like I got inside the dump truck I'm like, oh can I dump it can I dump it? Oh, I can't dump it You know I got inside this and truck and like oh can I pour some in? Can I go to God? I don't know why the James Bond car can't do any of the stuff that it usually does Okay, well that's a bit of a shit. Oh, it doesn't have spikes or anything Yeah, you can actually do that in the game though. Can you add that? No, it happens in the in the mission where you have that go With that. Oh really? I think it's right.. You buy the collet or it doesn't have that. Oh okay. It has two things right? It has the spikes. It has machine guns.

Oh that's true. And it has an eject to see. Yeah. I bought the, like I finished the game and then after what I bought the attack helicopter, it's got like rockets and chain guns on it. Was it? Yeah. But I forgot that it had rockets and shit on it.

So I got delivered to the My HilliPad. I was like oh sweet, my tank chopper's there. I got in in and I started flying I hovered up and I heard like a BB BB BB and I was like oh shit what's going on and I hit a and then rockets started shooting out they found like home did on a police helicopter off in the distance or blew it up like boom is something like three stars like oh shit you imagine like being that guy in real life you just gun down a police I just like the guy I just like the guy I say the guy here's like Something's locked on fire fire

But I mean having the helicopters also because the police come after you and they don't have weapons They are like you're shooting it's like fuck you guys take off I'm in the process of making a video for achievement hunter dot com. It's a good website where Gavin you giving it away All right fine. No, he's it played up. Yeah, I make it like a trying to do like a 50 ways to die video Although I'm up to like 35 so much. You're gonna you're not might you are you already decided I can't say gonna make it sound like he's like well You know I might have he's done with he's done with it. He's around the weird ways to die that I might not have thought of weird ways to die In GTA, he's thought of a lot about 35 of them. Have you been parachuting then hit the side of a building so hard you die? No really, I mean I've put my parachute and then fall into my death. No, I mean like like a fall death, but

Horizontally, vertically. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, I'll do that. If you hit a building yet happens that happened in real life All right, well about that. I'm saying well, I mean, I'm sure it happened. Yes, obviously We can't film that yeah, I can show that they come down You did get hit by a fucking helicopter that was pretty fun Yeah, I was gonna say Michael almost while he was a helicopter. I got sucked up in the blades I got killed by my own buzzard earlier today. I landed and then I got out of the helicopter and it was like a sliding climb and that's why I'm gonna wear the helicopter tilted a little and the fucking rotor hit me. I was like what the fuck?

I was looking for a spaceship part and I landed like on a slide and put it on the hill and when I got out fucking been killed me. Today I was just doing a bunch of side missions and stuff. I'm not that far. I'm like 45% into it now and I finally just cleared the whole map because I was tired of like the fucking fog of worship So I flew around with a helicopter and clear all that shit But I started doing the off-road races were use the ATV a lot And I'd really never use the ATV yet and so like after I beat the missions I was like using the ATV just like drive around and I had no idea how fucking deadly those things are. Because like four times in like 15 minutes,

I'd be going up a hill and then like go too far up and I'd fall off and then like as I fell off, it would immediately topple over and crush me to death and I'd die. It happened over and over and over again. I'm like these things are fucking death trapped in Gavin's like oh yeah, you wanna stay away from those. They're great if you're like,

if you don't wanna follow the road, you also wanna go for like point eight or point eight or point those. They're great if you don't want to follow the road. You also want to go for like, point eight or point eight directly. Yeah, great until you roll it. Yeah, you kill yourself so easily with them. My leg, I got run over by one of those when I was a teenager. I was on a friend of mine who was driving a four wheeler

and I was like sitting behind him and we were off out of ranch in the middle of nowhere. And we were driving through this field and it was kind of moist. It was like damp, I don't know. There's water in the grass. Don't bump. We started hitting some bumps in the sun like bumping and then my right foot slips off of the foothold and it gets like chewed up by the rear right tire and the guys

are friendly. So he doesn't know. He's still going and the tires just like nodding at my legs. It's like pooled under and I'm like like oh Like I started like pounding on his back and he stops and he has to back up It was super fucked up and I still have like a pretty long scar on my ankle on that leg I've like I still like run over people's feet before when they're trying to get in my car But that's it. Yeah, I go back to you when I was trying to get someone's sorry about that You're seeing those videos like someone will be standing back to you twice actually You see when his videos were someone will be standing and they like there's someone to run over their foot

Yeah, and the person like turns the wheel of the car and then stop crushing their legs leg. She's I have not. What do you and as I'm getting in a cop comes from behind, runs over the dude, knocks the door off the car, stops, turns on his flashing lights and comes after me. I'm like, he killed someone! And he's coming after me! Where's the justice i i had something happen the other day where i was um... i was trying to

fuck around with a tow truck like to like pick up cars and like just like crash in the shit and stuff like that was just like recording stuff but i wanted to get franklin in the tow truck as he has the driving ability you can slow down and it really like increases the like the the whip of the car you're telling you use Franklin's so I had the tow truck with Trevor and I kept like switching back and forth between them and I was trying to get one to the other like I'm calling

him up but I don't remember if I was in the middle of something where like Franklin wouldn't meet me so I had to just keep switching and like driving them little by little towards each other so I finally fucking like I find I'm Trevor I pull up next to Franklin I find him on the highway and he's driving his stupid ass green motorcycle which looks like shit I hate that motor, it's so ugly. It's so hideous. It's like how do you're like a gangster? It looks like a piece of shit Like this is like this thing like this a mom would driver kids like soccer kids You know they're like hopping the friggin side cars. It looks so awful But anyway, we meet up and I'm like fucking finally

So I fucking get out of the car And then I'm like do check it out and raise like oh, it's weird to look at each other and I run around for like 20 seconds Like an idiot. I'm like oh, what's up? What's up? So I go to switch to Franklin and you know how like it zooms out on the map like up in the air comes back And I'm like hey right check this out like it'll be funny And he's like oh is he's gonna go right up and come back down and I'm like probably so it goes all the way up in the air Moves like a couple blocks and comes down like what the fuck Franklin's in the hospital he got one over in the road while I was switching to him I'm like god damn it I'm gonna find

a tow truck all over again I was like you gotta be kidding me in the five seconds I switched he must have got killed he got run over in it by car that's fucking funny so could you if you're in a car and then he switched to someone in a tow truck could you tow you're in carrots and yeah I imagine I love doing that when I'm driving the tow truck if people piss me off like oh fuck you I just get in front of them yeah if you do it fast enough you can keep them in the car stop you like just drive fast and stuck in there you like slamming reverse and then throw it forward they won't have time to get out then you can like throw them off cliffs and shit

Which what I was trying to do with the car, but they go that's where did I it's a fun game I'd quick save is the best thing ever. It's so useful. I didn't know it was there For the first like I was almost done with the game I think I was like 60% of the way done with the game before I found it I saw the tip but I just assumed it'd be like it wasn't all the other games where it would just it Just put you yeah near where you were without the vehicle you're in but it's like the vehicle you're in Where you are you can save yourself in the air yeah, yeah, it's good. Yeah, I think I think it's pretty handy Especially when you're filming. Can you say yourself mid fall from the air? No, because I don't think you can get your phone out You can even say that I don't know if it's like full blown alert like if you have stars or if it's only when they're flashing

But I know for a fact when they're flashing you can save it while you have a wanted level Hmm cuz like I did it by accident I was like screwing around and I forgot about it and I'm like playing the game a day later I'm like to do to do like I load the game up and like walk around the room and shit because you know Takes like you know 30 40 seconds to load the game and Also, I'm gonna get I get in I'm getting shot at like oh my god. What the fuck's happening? I like two stars. Yeah, but it's handy as hell. There are sometimes it is grayed out But for the most part you can use it just yeah, yeah, I don't think you can use it during missions

Okay, yeah, that's probably what it is. So what's the deal with? There's so there's two different stock markets and one of them is affected by what other people are buying and selling Yeah, either is anyone here use the stock market? Yeah, Michael started dabbling. I've dabbled in it. The one, the LCK. Yeah, the LCK is all your own. It's just like the game. And then Bossack is, I guess, online from what people are saying,

which is why it's such smaller percentages online. I guess it's every single user ever. And I guess that's like the average and since most people I'm sure don't use it like the transactions are so tiny. Like in the game you know you look at a stock and you'd be like up 30% you know we're down 40% like on boss act it's like plus point zero two percent. It's like so little like I don't know how you make my job. It's the any way you could manipulate it then since the volumes are so low like if everyone

here at Rooster Teeth do something together could we all manipulate I think if you had enough people I would think so like Ryan that was the first thing Ryan said he's like can we crash the stock market that's of course Ryan's like go to let's put it in the hole yeah I was like I don't know if the six of us could and Joel should ride on this I mean like staring the shit out of this cricket yeah was cricket just rolled up out of nowhere just off what you want to make well we can't get a close-up. It's off camera Here comes but yeah, if we got like 30 people. I'm sure you can make a dent in it or something

Hmm. I'm sure there's gonna be people doing that once online. Hopefully goes on tomorrow That's a flying cricket Is that such a thing everyone I said is horrified? Well, there's such a thing as a flying cricket? Yeah, or did we just like miss label it? No, you can fly oh, they always these always come around to during like Played-a-murderic plane got a stick watch out cricket It's like do it in fine. Yeah fly free cricket Now it was my apartment. I would have sick Lindsey on it by now get it kill it and I'd be in the other

I thought you were gonna say I would have killed it by now. I was like correction No, I was made a kill it. I wouldn't like take care of it when Gavin was over at our apartment last I think it was last time we went swimming and he went into the bathroom and there was a roach somewhere And you said you saw it on the wall or on the door on the door like right in my head and almost instantly he opened the door And he goes oh oh goodness. Oh, oh god. Oh god. Oh god. It was like a horror movie. Yeah, like Gavin was like he wasn't like oh shit. Oh my god There's a bug he was just like Oh Like slowly backed up like Gavin what about you? Gavin what he's like oh

There is a huge bug it was like you saw someone being murdered. I just can't do with cockroaches. I'm good as spiders Yeah, I hate spiders I can pick up a spider. Don't you have roaches where you live? No, yeah, you do in England. No, you live right now. Yeah And almost landed on you, but I didn't see it some fine No, I think you meant where you live right now. Oh, yeah, yeah You're you I Chips on the cups and then I gas them a dehydrant What are you doing? I just gave him some money.

I shot no undercups and then I gasped them a deodorant. It doesn't kill him. It doesn't kill him. It doesn't, but it makes him kind of heavy and drowsy because if I just put him under a cup, I'd never be drowsy. No, because if I put him under a cup, I'd just give him an inspection afterwards

or how are you feeling? Can you cough? Let me, on a scale of one to ten, how are you going to cough? One of those red cups on them. It would just run under the cup and move the cup around. So I have to kind of mess them up on the inside. Do you watch him like run around the mess

No, I just go to sleep when I wake up in the cup somewhere else like up pressed against the door or something you move five feet last night That's how you know they're drowsy they move less and less feet Zigzag I want to do a time lapse just looking down on my floor We should do it we should do roach time lapse. Oh, no, dude You can do like roach bingo, too Just draw like that drop letters on that floor. It's gonna be when we wake up. Yeah, yeah, you come over We'll do a sleepover all right in you want to come as well sure

As you can be sleeping together, you know, I woke up in the middle of the night last night and You guys are gonna be sleeping together, you know? I woke up in the middle of the night last night and I woke up and I did the thing where I was kind of drowsy like kind of trying to shake off a dream Did you pee? And I was laying on my left side like totally flat on my left side and I rolled forward to be like on my stomach

and I realized that I was lying right on the very edge of my bed and if I had chosen a roll on my back I would have just fallen right the fuck off like literally I was on the edge of the I could not have been more over That's probably why you woke up is because you were a Shaking your endangered. It's like how the fuck did I end up in that position? I always get the opposite or I'll wake up and I'm like, huh? Because I think I'm about to fall off the bed and then I'll look and I'm like dead center like I'm absolutely fine I just had a panic attack in sleep. That happens a lot. She does. She

except she'll go so far. We'll she'll go from her end all the to the middle to then I'm getting pushed off the bed. And I'm like get the fuck over there. Yeah. Stand your side. I also said no. I'm like sleep. It's called sleep paralysis, I guess, but like it feels like I can't move my body. I know I'm supposed to wake up and I'm shouting at my body to wake up robot. I can't move my body. I know I'm supposed to wake up and I'm shouting at my body to wake up robot. Get up for me please. Yeah, and so I'll like start yelling in my head,

like wake up, wake up, and then eventually I'll start screaming out loud and that's when Michael's like, whoa, wake up, cool. We'll see if you like to sleep on her limbs. And they fall asleep. We'll show like sleep on her arm and it'll fall asleep.

And then that'll cause some like crazy dream where she can't move her arms, which will result in her being like, ah, and I have to like shake her awake like stop sleeping on your fucking arm. Bernie gets sleep paralysis sometimes too. It's free. Do you ever have the kind some people have it where they have a kind where they wake up and they think they're someone standing in the corner of the room watching them. I've never had that. I get crazy. They call it I think they call it a heartbeat. Oh, that's weird, a heartbeat. Yeah, look, if you look up sweet paralysis, you'll see that's like one of it.

I just get where I know I'm supposed to be awake and I'm like, I know I'm still sleeping. Come on, body, get up. And because again, because I'm shouting at myself in my brain, it just starts to become outward. Becca recently posted a video. Did you see it? I didn't watch it, but I saw if she posted it.

It was just security camera footage from her house. And I guess she woke up was paralyzed and saw Like a face floating above her like looking right down there But she couldn't even look away because she was paralyzed and she posted this on Facebook It was just I guess some sort of home security footage you can't see her But you can just hear a scream and at the top of her lungs like ah And then she just like goes down, it's like, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, and then she just goes down and then it's like, no thank you.

I can't suppose it's true. I obviously don't know if it's true and you can debate it, but supposedly, Aduda went to college with, had that similar experience, and then he found out later that a woman had killed herself in his apartment and they were like, I think you saw the woman's ghost

and he was convinced that it was her ghost that it like visited him. Yeah. I hope not. To probably just sleep paralysis. To it. The standard process. The old scene faces while you spin in the eyeically.

The when I went to college the year before I moved into my room, the guy who lived in my room previously was an arsonist who had set fire to our pub on campus. Oh, she's I think he's still in prison. Oh, yeah, awesome. We'll put the blue light. Don't set pubs on fire. Yeah, I like what's one of the things I loved about school I went to is we had two pubs on campus. You could drink on campus like most schools don't allow that in the US. Yeah, why'd you go in the pub down? And the motherfucker went in and he burned one of them down. Did they rebuild it? Yeah, they rebuilt it. Okay.

It was better though. It was way bigger. Yeah, of course. So I mean, it worked out in the end. So when I was a freshman, it was fucking closed because it had been burned down. He paved the way for the future generation. Have you been to any pubs in America yet, Gavin? It's Irish pubs.

And compared like how they were at home. Right here. I mean, I love bars off pubs really. True. I'd say wood rice is a pub. Well, it wants a difference. One's in America and one's in England. But we have pubs here in America.

Who gives a shit? It's a place where you just find and understand what's up here. Okay, there's a bar and there's wood everywhere. Let's take the question a step further. So you obviously have pubs in England. Yeah. Are there bars in England? Holy shit. How early that air was that? Are you serious? This wasn't a question to stump you. I was just genuinely curious

So the difference between a bar and a pub in England This is the atmosphere and like how many old people are in there. That's like, you're doing old? Is that what it is by definition? How many old people? A pub must have at least 65% old people. See, Ben is probably, like, because I never did, I just went, I was in a small town. I'm not talking about like a club.

I don't know, but Ben would be the one to ask about that, because he drinks everywhere. I just drank and crappy pubs in my small tiny town. Okay. I don't know what the difference is. Yeah, if there's a difference in the UK. I'm curious to know what it is because it's a different here. Like, someone like Vogue to Rebs. I thought it was just like, okay, yeah, of course. Stereotypical, British or Irish things make it a pub. Yeah, I'm going to read this thing here. When I remind everyone that this podcast is brought to you by Audible.com, the internet's leading provider of audiobooks of more than 150,000 downloadable titles across all types

of literature and featuring audio versions of many New York Times bestsellers. For our listeners, Audible is offering a free audiobook to give you a chance to try out their service. One audiobook to consider is the Red Parabits, the King Chronicles book one. For a free audiobook of your choice, go to audiblepodcast.com slash RT. That's audiblepodcast.com slash RT. As in Rooster Teeth. Nice. I get it. I didn't explain it. I didn't know what those were.

Just to help you remember. Who cleans the president's toilet? The president's made? So the president's made. Is that like a trusted person who's? I assume. Yeah. No, no, they literally just picked up on a positive. You want to clean the president's toilet today it's really bad my job is that it's like such a low job in the chain of jobs you're cleaning a bug right it's an important job though it is but why would you be such a high

level it's such a low level job well I'm sure she's cleaning more than just the fog. Why don't you just progress? Yeah, I'm sure it's something that needs everything. Yeah, but why don't progress to, like, I don't know, receptionist. Well, I'm sure that whoever's, like, Obama's fry cook is still really excited to be Obama's fry cook, and he's, like, the best fry cook ever. Think about it. Maybe.

Also, being, like, someone cleaning the fog for the president. Probably, I mean, if you're already doing that i mean how much better can it get it i mean it's also like they're they're cleaning the toilet or the clean the white house they're like thank god i'm not clean the the bus station anymore you know yeah they're not cleaning public toilet i got the right i was pretty nice how did you get that job i know you so amazingly trusted to be allowed into the middle of the white

house you probably have to have crazy security that's right would you go through the president's shit if you were there made So amazingly trusted to be allowed into the middle of the White House. Yeah, you probably have to have Crazy security Would you go through the president's shit if you were there made and you were in charge of cleaning up the bathroom Like if you love the church the president doesn't flush the toilet. I don't know. He might be busy Sorry, I gotta go yeah hang on Gus is getting something Yeah, hang on Gus is getting something they keep what secret Oh, all right here goes making a face. I guess I can't believe someone just told me that there's they're insisting It's true. All right, it's probably not true, but let's hear it. They keep the president shit secret so that no one can steal the DNA That no way. I guess they don't let people know which bathrooms or toilets. He's actually used really

I mean what was it like a thousand toilets? Do you guys have a problem with that? There's probably a lot of toilets in the White House. Yeah, but I mean, in the span of a week, how many different things could he use? Well, so his D.A. is a live the calf. Yeah, it's probably, like, how easy would it be to get his hair? He's opening doors. He goes on Ellen. It's touching the couch, that is his D.A.

Yeah, but that's not common. Like, like, a place where he shits if he sh see we should at the same total time. It would be constant Do you think there's a guy like in toilet a and he's just waiting for the poop and he's like fuck he's in be Yeah, do you think there's a secret service man who always has to be ready to take a shit at the same time And they're like they both go in you know the president used your own secret service guy You know what you know like some villi's like foil about Secret Service guy you know what you know what? There's like some villies like boil about it. Secret Service guy. How did they not be in a scene at all?

He didn't say it would be the same bill because you can get the DNA sample. He's trying to make a clone of the president. They just get some due to the suit with some glasses. Damn it. We chose wrong again. I like the idea of a clone being born with sunglasses off. Yeah, it'd be like, you know, when you get like a jet is like targeted. They drop chaffs to like distract it.

It'd be like the chaff shit. There'd be like four shits to go along with the president's turn to like What are you doing? I'm the ghost shit Whenever the president needs to go I need to be ready something if the phone reads at four o'clock in the morning I'm there So like some like Dave England I'm a good job on the month President's job

It's my job to be ready so what's what's the worst job cleaning the president's shit or masking the president's shit probably still cleaning yeah again I feel like you'd find some crazy stuff in president's poo like John F. Kennedy probably had some crazy poo why would you mind why would John I probably like Chris is probably in probably like I'm in his poo Yeah, what the fuck does that mean? I don't think he was into Skeleton you can't help me myster. What do you think you ate? I'll be my doctor salad or something. I don't know. How would that be in his

Pooh? It's not so weird. It's not the presidential salad. No, he's he said he's He's a he tossed her salad. Yeah. It's a two-way Three wasn't doing his boo. Did anyone see anyone else's pony? Shut up. I'm really glad I don't have to do an ad read right now following this This fucking impossible. God. What are you talking about? I'm just saying you're twisted shit happens who's twisted me? Yeah, I wake up screaming. Of course. I was looking at the microphones like the wire It sounds like what was twisted the Mexilar cord is very Not her personality

It was a if it was a high-stellarie job what clean the person. It's toilet. Yeah sure. Why not? It's probably not bad It's probably not bad because you're not bad of the White House. I imagine the lowest I imagine the lowest paying jobs pretty good in the White House They're not gonna do it. I'm actually like out select perimeter God isn't that good? Cuz you're still a guard dude. Yeah, you're still Here's a gun, but you're on the outside You know, I'm pretty sure anyone in there That direction never point it in this direction The new guy we're paying him shit. It's got a gun of these on the outside you're talking about every one in america

not really now and anyone who woke up to the white house with a gun and point at i don't think so i don't know i don't know how to i think that i'm like with a gun in hand being outside period with a gun has a lot of strict regulations you have to have concealed weapon first of all i

can't wait around you can open carry oh yeah you can open carry to uh... in texas and there was that thing uh on congress a few weeks ago where asking the thing about me pay attention to politics come now there's like uh there people were uh exercising their right to open carry they were walking with like rifles up and down congress you know that that's that's scary this is scary place to live

yeah you've been fine since you've here? How many times you've been attacked or shot at? Yeah, exactly I have a job because you got stabbed at a burger king over by campus that was across from my old dorm, too Really? Yeah sucks. I just want a burger. Yeah, they went to Burger King Yeah, and he went to Burger King. Dude, it was like a slice of skill of that choice. Dude, you did, there was a thing like, it was like right around when I first moved here. So it was probably almost two years ago,

but maybe it was a few months after I moved here. We went to, how do you remember? It was like a bunch of people, I think I was like, Chris and Brandon and like a bunch of people, and we went to a restaurant somewhere, and it was like either downtown or close to downtown, and there was like eight cop cars across the street, and we're like, the fuck's going on over there. And it was like, apparently, we like read about it. We were trying to figure it out the street and we're like the fuck's going on over there and it was like apparently

We like read about it. We were trying to figure out the next day like what the fuck happened and first we thought it was one thing and another thing And we're pretty sure it was like this guy got in a fight with his mother. I was there with you Oh, were you there for that? Yeah, this guy got in this fight with his mother They had it out like he hit her or something like that or she had like a panic attack or something They had it out like he hit her or something like that or she had like a panic attack or something Cops came ambulance came the mother was in the in a stretcher and they were putting her in the ambulance The guy got away from the cops like he either walked off or whatever they noticed him God in his truck and ran her over while she was in the stretcher at the scene all the cops never do was there He ran over his mom in the stretcher and like one of the paramedics who was trying to put her in the ambulance, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then they just grabbed him out of his truck. But all that happened while we were eating dinner. That's what I thought. Yeah, we were at the mines over there in South La Mar right by the Alamo, where it happened. Yeah. You saw it. No, we didn't see it.

We were like, man, I wonder what's going on over there. It's like, man, there's like 10 cop cars here in an ambulance. It's like literally right across the street. That's crazy. That's insane. I, my, was with my family in England and we street. That's crazy. That's insane. I might was with my family in England and we did see we were at a restaurant actually. I told Gavin about this. I was like maybe 15, 14, but we were eating at a restaurant later in the evening.

And we looked towards this building that had a bunch of scaffolding. We saw a dude standing there. We're like, that's weird. He's on this construction site. And we saw him like tie a pant leg to his neck and then tie the other pant leg He jumped but his jeans broke so he fell and it wasn't very far It was like three stories, but he was still like oh Yeah, well, I mean you can't die, but he clearly hurt himself very much But my family was like oh my goodness what happened? I'm trying to talk to him finally the the Bobby showed up and a Yeah, so they tried to explain. And my family was like, oh, I saw him.

Ty's jeans, he jumped. I don't know what's happening. The dude was very, very drunk. And he was trying to explain to the cops that he was totally fine. He was just going on a walk. And they were like... He tripped?

I just tripped three stories up, three stories, and then down, and then he was like... He was like, I'm so ripped to death. But he was like, no, I'm just walking, man. I'm trying to get back to my apartment and they're like well why the hell are your pants up there and they're just like waving in the breeze like a flag I can't believe he survived that there's only three stories guys you you could die falling off a one-story yeah I'm well aware she's just like she didn't fall

that far it was like that's far I thought she was gonna be like, it was only like five feet. If you fell off that barrel wrong, you could die. Dude, my grandmother, like 10 years ago, my grandmother got out of bed in the middle of the night, getting out of bed and sitting down, she broke her friggin' legs. Grand, she's an old lady, but I mean, she should happen. She's in place of her legs. Yeah, she's getting out of bed, like, hopping down

from bed, hitting the floor. She like, hit her legs at like the exact like wrong angle. And she's not like, I'm not like, you know, confined to a wheelchair and like like, she was like, you know, she's up and active and you know, an active 80 year old woman. I never seen anyone try and do themselves in, but I was with, I think I might have been

with Bernie and Jeff in Lesser. Oh, maybe it was Jason or Bernie. That was just puddle of blood. It's like really massive puddle of blood out in front of a pub. It's like, did that guy live? Yeah. Just too much blood to have. Have you ever been to the bar downtown here in Austin, the library?

No. Yeah. You know how there's that staircase that goes up to the upstairs? It's got kind of a wide thing at the bottom. One time I was there was having some drinks and I went to the bathroom and I walked by the stairs and like you said, like at the bottom of the stairs, there was just like a giant I went to the bathroom and I walked by the stairs and like you said like at the bottom of the stairs There was just like a giant puddle of blood and no one was cleaning it. No, it wasn't marked off like Signore, we saw that this is heat. We saw that at a bar 2 and it may have been the library because I saw that too downtown at one point

Same thing. We were like holy shit There was a trail of blood like down the stairs and we were like, oh, what is that from the library? He's not the one that has it has like a certain ice that has like cheap ass long island iced tea, like picture long island iced tea or something. Yeah, we've been there before. She's saying it's over her head, but we've been there. Of course, that's why you forget.

Yeah, that's true. It's like $4 like picture glasses. You talk about the time you lost your car. That was amazing. I don't think we've ever mentioned that. That's pretty tough. What night was that? I don't know why we were downtown. I don't remember we were downtown for something. It was like a big powwow

A bunch of people are there Gavin scared the crickets flying by so we leave we leave the bar right Lindsay and I leave It's like 130 and We parked in a different location and then we normally park in this one That's what it was okay. It's Carrie's birthday. We normally park in this one garage. Car's birthday. That's what it was. Okay, it's Car's birthday. We normally park in this one garage and we go downtown, but it was closed that night. So we park somewhere else like on the street and use the meter. So the bar was like a few blocks away.

There's this whole ordeal going on with the cricket right now. So we park, we go there, we're there for like hours and hours all night. Lindsay and I leave. Gavin was there with us when we got there, but you were getting a ride home from somebody else. So the two of us leave, and we have no idea where the fuck the car is. So we're like, we're like, oh, it's right down here. And Lindsay's like, I wrote it down so we don't forget where it was. So she pulls out her

phone and she's like, oh, it's on this street. So we go to the street, we can't fucking find it. We're like, God damn it. We're looking all over the place. We're walking around downtown for like 45 minutes, looking for this fucking car. So I can't down whatever road it could now pass to am. And we're like you put like two blocks from where we were. Yeah we're far at all. Yeah. But we was in it was in on it was not a normal spot where we parked. So we were like fuck it, fuck it. Let's just get a cab. We'll fucking find it tomorrow. Let's go home. Probably shouldn't drive home anyway. So we call the cab we fucking we go home We drops us off at our apartment. I open the gate

We're walking up to the gate and we have we have an attached garage in our apartment So you can go into the garage and walk up a flight of stairs and we have a door a second door leading into our apartment As we're walking up the apartment. It's now like 2 30 in the morning. I'm like Motherfucker we came out of the garage and we have a dead bowl and then a keyless dead bowl on our front door. So if the keyless dead bowl is locked, you can't open it from the outside. We came out the garage, the fucking garage opener was in the car downtown. So I'm like, we can't get into the apartment. So the garage, we can't get in and the front door is dead bolted and keyless

locked shut. So we at like 2.30 almost 3 in the morning, we then't get in and the front doors dead bolted and keyless locked shut So we at like 2 30 almost 3 in the morning we then left came to the office and slept in the achievement Hunter office to like 6 30 in the morning then Monty drove us downtown in the morning We found our car an hour before it would have gotten a ticket for parking and then drove our car back went home took an hour Nap and then came to work. Oh, oh, I'm going to take a little bit more. Yeah So then so then I come in and everyone at the office is like, man, there's this whole mystery going on. A why the achievement of our office is blown the fuck apart. Cause we walked into like 4 a.m. I like threw everything on the floor and like,

we're already so angry. We just slept on the couch and I slept on the floor and then we just left in the morning. So in the morning, it looked like a break in. And he's like, what happened? So like, I sent the jack. I was like, oh, yeah, I slept here last night and he's like's like, what happened? So like, I sent the jack. I was like, oh, yeah, I slept here last night. And he's like, oh, what happened? I'm like, ah, it's a whole thing.

As I just said, and he's like, oh, I'm really sorry about that, man. And I realized that I was like, oh, no, no, no, Lindsey slept here too. And he was like, he thought I slept at the office. He's like, I think I got a department. But I was like, no, we slept our car downtown by accident. It's pretty funny to go out and get drunk.

Go home, go to sleep, wake up and go to work. Because that's instant. Yeah. And then to discover this whole adventure, while I was asleep, mind of my business. Right. Gavin came in and he was like, I wonder what happened? Didn't I text you?

And I was like, we have a tale of Epic Adventure that makes you look like a little bitch. Or just that. It just makes us look like idiots little bit. Not just that. It makes us like idiots. One time I was downtown and it was a Friday night. I was out drinking with friends. Parked my car, got really drunk. Went back to find my car and my car was gone.

And I was like, I know I parked right here. And my car is not here. I was like, sweet, my car got stolen. I was really happy for some reason. It was like a real shitty car. I was like, thank God I'm going to get a new car. So then I was really happy for some reason. I'm sure. It was like a real shitty car. I was like, thank God I'm gonna get a new car. So then I was like, all right, I gotta ride home with a friend, woke up Saturday morning.

My friend was like, you wanna go to Houston? I was like, fuck yeah, I wanna go to Houston. Went to Houston, spent all day there. Came back, my car's still missing out of my car. So then like Sunday morning, I'm like, all right, I gotta do some evolving, missing car. So I called the cops and I'm like, yeah, I think my car was stolen Friday night. What I need to do?

Like, what's your last split number? So I tell them, they're like, oh no, your car got towed. And I was like, what? I was like, I was parked in a place I could park. And they said, oh, well, your car got broken into. And the window was smashed out. And we tried calling you, but you didn't answer so we told your car

why what sense is that now is like why they're like we don't want to go to broke into again that was already told that they were gonna take your mastery so they were like yeah just come down pay the two hundred dollar in pound

feet and i was like mother what did that's a fact as i was a that i had to buy a new window. I Have to pay the impound fee my fucking car stairs been ripped out all of my CDs were stolen They pop my trunk took everything that was in my trunk

And then so then like I was like fine fuck. I got a deal with all this shit then on Monday The cops call me and they're like we think we recovered some of the stolen property from your car And I was like okay, that's weird. So I go down to the police station there like can you describe everything that was stolen? I was like, yeah, I don't know my stereo CD's I was like I had a duffle bag in I had the weekend before I'd got a paintball game So all my paintball gear was still in the trunk. I was like I had a duffle bag with some paintball stuff in the trunk They're like can you describe what was in the duffle bag? I was like, I don't know a paintball stuff in the trunk. They're like, can you describe who's in the double bag? I was like, I don't know, a paintball gun, some camo fatigues.

And they're like, was there a lanyard in there that's hit Area 51? Nice. There's like an Area 51 paintball game. Oh, yeah, that's mine. Yes. So like, who's your double bag? And I was like, oh shit.

That's awesome. It was like so fucking embarrassing. Do you still have your paintball gear? Because we won. And then the only thing that was in there, they took the paint, they stole a paintball gun. All of a sudden, there was like so fucking embarrassing. Do you still have your paintball gear? No, and then the the thing that was in there they took the paint they stole a paintball gun All of a sudden there was back back though the pants in my land your Do you mean they didn't steal your land your guys? Yeah, they my area for thank God for national security They came out to a president's poop with an area of 51 badge

Sip through this so I was and then anyway, but the next day when we found her car It was not a different fucking street than she wrote down Whoops like when we were sober and got there she wrote on her phone Where we parked so we wouldn't forget and it was the wrong street Which is why we couldn't find it four hours later when we were drunk off her ass It's like because we were convinced that's like no sober sober Lindsey was sure it was his block So we must be drunk and we just can't find it And the next day I'm like you fucking idiot. How did you figure out it was a different street then we found it the next morning Like when we found the part where we parked it money was driving

This is not the fucking street road down she's like oops it was like one block over he drove us around downtown And Michael just leaned his head and an arm out the window with my car alarm and made it go I was just clicking the alarm out the window and then we heard it like I hear it And then like we found it around the corner. It was like, oh, sweet. All right, I'm going to bed, bye. It was 7 a.m. and he was dropping us off and then going home and going to bed.

Yeah, Monty was pretty cool about it, which is nice. He's a killer right now, isn't he? Yeah, I think so. When I was in Florida a couple of weeks ago, I had a rental car and I did a thing where I went to University of New York as I was talking about it last podcast and I went and I saw all the shit there. Then when I came back to the parking lot to go

to my car, I wrote down where I parked. It was like King Kong 309 and then I'm walking down looking for my car and I realized I have no idea what car I rented. Nice! I was like I wrote down exactly where I parked. I would not know the car was in front of me. Such a the same thing where I was just walking like trying to tell the car. Did it all sound the key? not know the car was in front of you such as the same thing where I was just walking like Did I say on the key what make the call was no folks wagon? Oh did have a little picture of your car on the Eann Gishar forgot what it looks like great any one of these Volkswagen's in this giant row It's an amusement park it's a fucking giant lot. I do that to find my car all the time And it's okay because you're only for a few seconds

You're that asshole who's making the car alarm go off? But you find it in a second. Yeah, who cares in a parking lot? Yeah, but Michael was like baffled when I first told him, he's like, well, that's a really good idea. I never thought about that. Like, yeah, of course, make your car alarm go off. It'll find it in a second.

Go. I read, you know, like, there's always articles online, like home security tips or what to do if you have some broken into. I read an article once it said that, if you ever wake up in the middle of the night and you like you think you hear someone in your house That you should set off your car like if you keep your car keys next to your bed You should set off your car law good idea because ended like if it's late at night it attracts attention

You don't run out of your bedroom screaming no, okay? It's the idea and I was like well, that's a really good idea. I never would have thought of that Are you allowed to bludge in someone to death if they break in oh, yeah, especially in Texas self that. Are you allowed to bludge in someone's a death if they break in? Oh yeah, especially in Texas. Self-defense. Are you allowed to bludge in someone's a death? Well, there was that woman who shot the intruder in his legs. That's not bludgeoning. No, but kind of similar argument, I guess.

Like, a man broke into her house and instead of killing him or trying to like call the cops or just saying, uh, I'm sorry. She shot him in the... I'm so sorry, sir. Uh, she shot him in the legs twice so he couldn't leave her house. And then she decided to call the cops while she was like holding him at gunpoint. And I guess like, I think if you bludgeon someone to death, though, that's different because like, you can incapacitate them and it could be unconscious and you keep going.

Yeah. I'm like, you shoot someone in the face. It's like, I shot him and he's dead. And you'll like, especially in Texas, you'll be, they'll be like, at your find. But like, if they're like no longer a threat and then you inflict damage, I'm sure you could get. Oh, yeah, I think you're in trouble.

Because like, if you just shoot somebody, it's self-defense. If they break in, you're like, pop. It's just like, I shot you one time, you know what I mean? But if you were like, whacking on someone, I imagine there's a point where it's like illegal i guess so just shoot someone when they break it the moral of the story is but it's safe and there's just court cases you've heard about where like

the uh... family of the home that was broken into ends up having to pay the person who broke in because they hurt themselves while they're trying to break in or something i heard about that one time i can't remember what state it was in but a guy was going to break into a house and he was on the roof the roof was like shitty and it was like an old roof the roof cave didn't he fell through the roof landed like on their kitchen table and like broke his back sued the family like took a real story no it was real I don't know that he won look at all like actually tweet us no I'm serious oh serious. Oh, I should check Twitter. I should be checking Twitter

Let us know so it's been a while like actually took the case, you know I don't know where it ended up But like someone actually like took it a case where he could charge him with something Well, I guess like the thing is you can sue anyone. Yeah, especially in America They make that joke in Liar Liar too. Isn't that Jim Carrey's court case too? Yeah, yeah I've never seen Liar Liar Oh liar oh you're pretty good I'm an idiot you idiot Gus is it any good personal offense to that you're off the podcast get out me myself and I mean it's top you know we're fighting himself top cable guy was way better cable guy was not better than me myself

Irene. Yeah, cable guy was shit. It's 20 not loading cable guy. Yeah, get out of here That movie is universally awful. Everyone knows it's a bad movie. It's so good There's one or two like kind of funny moments in that movie, but that is not a good movie That is a shitty Jim Carrey movie. I think I wanted Jim Carrey's best, but maybe that's you don't know what you're saying right now What is the top movies the mask? No, I'm agreeing I'm listening to the classic I don't list the mask with cable guy. Oh, yeah, I know our sarcastic look like okay, did the mask that was great Ace Ventura was top especially the first one. Yeah, bloody senior ding things and Ace Ventura. Yeah he is. He's a Mr. Shikidens. I forgot about that. That got

familiar. 23. 23 was not a good movie. Everyone says sounds like the liar liar story. They're back in you up. Could be the liar liar story. Someone's back in you up. They said they've heard the same story about the guy falling. filtered with skylight and broke his back He won the case. I would like to see a link or some corroborating Picture what? You suck what is wrong with you tonight? You're a mile away from the mic. I know I can kill you. Yeah, I could lean in. You're gonna tilt it over to you

I know kill you. Yeah, I could lean in. You're gonna tilt it over to you My mic check from this far. Did you okay? It'd be clean. I was what we used to do the audio podcast. It should be this close right on it You're right. That's how they're designed. Well, I mean for last place the right on him, but Patrick's over didn't need to Make it face if I hear otherwise. I'm gonna slap you. I'm waiting. I'll slap you back I'm not gonna take that Oh shit look at you fucking standing up The thing is though it's all good the thing about it Gus is though He says he's gonna stand up for himself. He hasn't actually that day hasn't come yet No, I've been known to tackle Gus. He's thinking about it. That's not

He did that once in a row of guns. So we wrestled Gavin Gavin wrestled with John the other night in a drunken outburst. John rising her. Oh, really? Yeah. Remember that? We were a wooddrug.

Gavin gets physical when he gets drunk. We get so physical. He gets so grabby when he gets drunk. He took my phone. He kept putting it in the wrong password. I'd disable it my time. And then so yeah, John had his phone. He kept playing with it because Gavin was drunk off his ass.

He just let him take his phone. Take his phone. He got it wrong. And then Gavin laughed at him and basically told with it because Gavin was drunk off his ass and let him take it phone and let take his phone. Right. He got it wrong and then Gavin laughed at him and basically told him what his password was. So then when his phone reset, he did enter it and then Gavin proceeded to chase him around the backdoor area of Woodrow's, which is all just like dirt and sand. As we were watched by I just seen Adam Kovik, Game Over Gregie and Tim.

Yeah. And John's wife was there. And like, Austin, he runs off of the phone and then Gavin darts off chasing him. They like tackled each other and they're like rolling around in the dirt. And John's wife is like, Jesus Christ, that's my husband. You know, he's like, what the fuck is he doing?

I, and that was married to two kids. And he's rolling around in the dirt with Gavin at like one 30 in the morning fighting over his phone I went John was sober as shit He said at one point he just gave it back. He's like I didn't know when it was gonna end Yeah, John my fight. I started a Rooster teeth crew in GTA 5 John that email writing your joint. Yeah, you were the first person to respond you still haven't joined I don't know how to do

The link about that though. Can you join more than one crew? Oh, you can you be a multiple You were the first person to respond you still haven't joined I don't know how to do Can you join more than one crew? Oh, you can be a multiple okay, then I will join because we're gonna do our own Obviously like our own achievement hunter thing, but then I will join that's the only reason I haven't emailed you yet Because I just set that up today. I tried for like 10 minutes. I couldn't I Can't get out yelling out loud. How do I do it? And banging his mouth. I'll show you. So someone took the crew named Rooster Teeth. Yeah. So I couldn't name it that.

He said it's Rooster Teeth. Yeah. Would you want to go pay bowling, though, because we could call that our crew. Yeah, well, you guys are like approved people. Well, that same night, then John and Gavin had their tackle fest. We went to Blazer Tag, which is pretty awesome.

We all like soar for two days afterwards. My legs are running lightly sore. So I'm not running up and down slopes with a gun. Something about eating face. Like I, okay, at one point, especially in Blazartag, this one specific place we went to, they had two levels. So you, it was giant, like a giant maze of Blazartag. Blazartag is a three story.

It was in Blazartag. Yeah, it was a three story, I guess. I guess two. No, you go up and then super up. Yeah, it's all like stories No, you go up and then super up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, like all trop At one point though because it was so intense and we were the only ones who were really playing Because it's so intense. We were intense people we go all out when it comes to games, but We were going trying to be intense about it I guess and Adam was chilling in one corner and everyone's sliding and you're not supposed to run, but you might have broken a little bit of the rule. There's the, there's actually rules in the power of...

No running, no doing this. It was like 13 of us, like from Ruster Teeth and like, you know, gauntlet's stuff. Gauntlet people and stuff like that. And like three other people that just happen to be there. So it's like, I'd never been there before. And as soon soon as it started I'm like, oh, I guess nobody's gonna Everybody's running everybody's running. It's like oh Running and screaming diving in all over the place and shit. It's basically like 15 minutes of running up and down

45 degree angle slopes and like my legs were completely destroyed afterwards when we used to work at the call center That place opened up when Jeff and I used to work at the call center He mentioned this stuff that you guys tried to climb the leaderboards. Yeah, instead of eating lunch We would go to Blazer Tech every day and we were just fucking game it and try to go to the top Next cheap is fucking $8 a person instead of lunch Instead of lunch. Yeah, you pay for Blazer Tag $8 doesn't that expensive I thought I'd be sore to what was worse injury you guys sustained while we're playing laser tag I was I was in inches no, I have a few

I yeah, yeah, the only thing with me is I fell in my knees like a few days before and like I had like this big Scab on my knee that was like just starting to heal and because everything is 45 degree angles there's a lot of like little walls all over the place. So like a lot of times you were on your knees and going down the slopes it was perfect for you to just slide on your knees like woo and go down the slopes. And the first few times I'm like oh my knee but then after like five minutes is like eh whatever. And then like after laser tag like my entire scab was just completely ripped off. And I was like ah like it wasn't disconnected at one end,

but like the whole thing was attached and peeled from one end to the other, kind of like opening a can, like a camera to you. It was like peeled back, so I just had to rip the end of it all. That was the most painful part about it. It was your leg, just blood red. Yeah, it was, it was bleeding, when it lifted off.

I had, there was some surreal moments of that whole week. It was so stupid. Like we were doing laser tag, and I just, I just thought it was it was bleeding. Yeah, I had those some surreal moments of that whole week It was so stupid like we were doing ladies tag and I just I just thought it was gonna be an awesome start like running and diving and At one point I was like sliding down on my back while shooting behind me like an action movie and there was like another slope that met at the bottom of my one So I come sliding down and like my head lands right in the middle and I see justine the sliding down as well And our heads were like right together at the end. It's like, this is a really weird moment of my life. I just slid head first, it's I just teased. So I just teased.

I did this similar thing on one of those inclines. I was trying to slide down because Adam was looking at another corner. I was like, perfect, I'm gonna get Adam so badly. He won't even see it coming. I felt so cool. I went into the slide and I played softball so I felt like I could do it.

I caught an edge with my shoe, so I started to like roll and don't get tumble into him, but I was so committed, slash embarrassed. I started just shouting, I'm committed. I'm committed in shooting at him. I see somebody comes rolling down a hill towards them. I'm committed. Like the kid, what was that kid's name in hook

when he rolled up like a cannonball, make through, at the end of the movie? What was that kid's name? I never seen a hook. You never saw a cannonball, make thrum. Yeah, at the end of the movie. What was that kid's name? I never seen a hook. You never saw a hook. Oh, dude. Great movie. Real streeps in that.

She's a man in that. She's a man. Who's she in that? Who's she in that? She's one of the pirates. She's the guy who gets put in the boo box. Really? Yeah.

It's a real streep. I thought it was Glenn Close. Oh, maybe, yeah. Glenn Close. They're same. They're not the same. Yeah. Don't lose your type of spot.

It was a woman. It was very fun. All right. That was a total of women. It was very fun. So there was, there used to be a spot. Do they still have the gems on the wall? Yep. Yeah, there was a spot that Jeff and I would game where you could stand in a corner. No, so no one could sneak up on you

and you could shoot three of the gems as they came up. So we wouldn't even shoot people. We just stand there and be like, shoot the gems. Oh, because you get points. Yeah, you get way more points. And then you could. There was clearly like the person like Miles who had gone there before and played

Where like we're all running and screaming and shooting each other and he was like at the spot where he just like killed Everyone without moving so it was like the the points were like second place 1300 points third place 1200 points fourth place 1100 first place miles 2800 points And was like he was standing out of the spot the whole time like Like doctor. He got first both games. What are the sports though? I don't want to be good at because it's this nerdy. Yeah, except you bet me five dollars a second That you would be and you lost So the first game I got third and Gavin got six so the second game he bet me five dollars that he would be me

I did awful the second game. I'm like shit. I got eighth out of 16th and I'm like damn Gavin probably want to like Gavin. What'd you get? He's like, I don't want to talk about it I'm like Gavin. What'd you get? He got 13 Lindsey got 12 full baby and I was sick. I followed it after the first round. Wow. Yeah, she was She was sick before we got there so then she's I was like don't fucking play like I said before we left I'm like if you're sick, let's not go play fucking laser tag. She's like now. I'm fine So let me go play laser tag and we were on different teams both rounds We played two rounds and one round like 10 minutes in I turn the corner and I see someone on the floor And I shoot them and run past and I hear like like as I run by I'm like was that Lindsey and like I walk back around the corner

Just like I don't feel so good. I'm like, oh, you're right and like I start talking to whatever she's like Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, got started talking to whatever. She's like, yeah, no, no, no, no. And you know how it works like if you get shot, you're flashing for six seconds. And I'm like, all right, we'll just like sit in the corner and take it easy. You know, if you don't feel well, I'm doing it. She's like, all right, bye. She's like, I love you. I'm like, I love you too. And I shot her in the head the walk away. I was like, I need more points and I shot her and just walked away. Yeah. After the first round, we all finished. It was really hot in there too. It's just because we're running around. So I felt like crap. And then immediately after we finished, I was like, I have to go go everyone and I'm sure the manager heard me it was like there was violent gross vomiting and I was totally fine for round me though she takes laser text serious put this in the secret service agent in there with

her I like laser tag I think it's fun and intense but we want to step it up so we want to go paintballing it was like that's exactly what happened to me and Jeff was laser tagging it would be a gateway to paintball. Oh, here's the thing It's fun. It's fun, but I want to hurt people right and I want to get hurt while I'm doing it I remember the first time we got our paintball markers like you're kind of scared at first You're like I don't know if it's gonna hurt I remember we stood in a field by where we worked and we were like just shoot me Just shoot me I got to get this out of the way Just on bit flesh.

Did you ever freeze your paintballs? No. My friends older brother used to do that. We were like, we were 13, 14 year old. We were like, hey, we want to play paintball with you guys. They were cool. You can play with us and then they'd freeze their paintballs and shoot us. That can hurt you.

Here, let me read this thing. I want to remind everyone that this episode of the Ristief Podcast is also brought to you by Shadow Warrior. A bold reimagining of the classic first-person shooter from Flying Wild Hog into Valver Digital. We're going to cut out into a gunfight as low-wain clashes with the Yakuza that betrayed him and the demonic forces hellbent on destroying our world. Available now on Steam, GOG, Get Games, and the Humble Store. Um... GG!

Shadow Warrior. It's a remake of an old game from the late 90s. Michael, did a... Uh, Rachwood on it? Yeah, it's a fun game. I downloaded it today, and I've been playing a little bit. I'm only like... Got like two hours in, I think.

It's fun. It's glorious shit. Dude, you swice people's arms off and shit. Their heads come off. There's like naked anime chicks hide behind the waterfall. Yeah saw that GTA got way less gruesome than the over the is Yeah, until you place Trevor. No, I mean but I'm talking torture people Yeah, so in GTA 3 you could take people's arms and heads off Yeah, but it looked like crap. Yeah, it was a very realistic. Yeah, the So it's funny to me is I see a lot of people complaining in GTA V about the objectification

of women. Now you can tighten that silver one if you want to keep it up there. Yeah. The other way. Mike stands, 101. But I feel like the big thing that no one talks about in GTA V is that torture sequence. Wait, you have to walk hard. Yeah, that's rough. Michael was actually really getting unnerved.

I was watching. Not really. Let's not blow it out of portion. No, sorry. But here's the thing. If you go a lot of times in games, especially if you can be the good guy, the bad guy, you can do the good thing, the bad thing,

fable, not really Skyrim. But I don't know. Choice games, good or evil games. Mass effect. Mass effect, a little bit. You can do Renegade or a paragon or whatever But like in this when you're Trevor you're gonna do whatever Trevor is gonna do and you have no choice in it So it's just like yeah, you can't switch away from that character right so I was this was like when we're filming the gauntlet

And then we just like in between shots or whatever, you know Basically everybody there was playing GTA 5 and that's when I got to the Trevor Park in the torture scene and I'm just like Oh my god, and I was just like All right, what's the least I could do to this guy and like I just kept I just kept waterboarding him over and over And over because I felt like it was the least I could do it's like all right. Let's see. We got wrench All right, and I have pliers. You got like a jumper cables But it's a video game Yeah, but I don't know

But like I was in a bad guy. I didn't want to do it. I find myself I find myself actually adding to Trevor Like so some like You find that your playstyle changes. Yeah, I was thinking as though I was Trevor So there's one there's one heist where you have to prepare all this stuff You have to collect vehicles and then one part of it is you have to find any getaway vehicle and park it in a place Where you can drive to it later right and I was Trevor preparing a getaway vehicle for Michael later on So I found this getaway vehicle. I put it in a hidden place. I called him let him know where it was before I did that I was like what would Trevor do here? So I drove around and got a whore

before i did that was like what would Trevor do here so i drove around and got a whore drove to the same spot where i was going to leave the vehicle shagged the whore like over and over again in the car and then left because now i'm like i have to go in and drive the car that's been shagged in that's what i just be adding to the trevice really weird what's funny is i've played i finished the game i'm like 76% complete and collecting collectibles i've never seen a prostitute yet in that game i I saw them every time I saw what I was I was

Parking up the car. I was ready to text. I was like, is that hookah? God, I don't know that there were a lot more common than like GTA 3 Here's the thing I shagged her until there was nothing left like she was gone But you could only shagged a set amount of time so what happens? She's like I'm afraid I'm all shagged out. Oh, so that means there's nothing left What do you mean? That's just what you said? There's nothing left to shagger again. Oh, there's no option left. Okay. There's so there's a human still I just imagined like sticky seats I fucker in the best guys. She's gone. You didn't make her to

Centipede I fucked her away I'm gonna be in real life like you were making passion at love to someone and they just like disappeared in the middle of it. You're like, I'm done. I feel like the third or fourth time you were the only one that were like, you're making fun of me. You're my dick in right now.

They found traces of her and you'll poo. Yeah, yes. It's all connected. Okay, okay, Gavin. Gavin. Beat up up up up up. That's how Matthew McConaughey's father died during sex. He had a heart attack while he was banging.

I was good. When did that happen? I don't know. That's when his wife was talking about it on the interview. She was like, oh, and the way she was talking about it was weird too. She was talking about like, it was this really happy moment. And then he just went away. And I was like, I don't know. I guess maybe I'm not here. He was still there. He did. And I'm on top of you. So, the thing about like, your battery is about in your 3DS by the way. That's fine. Your flash can hang on. I got nothing. I just got it today.

I just think about it. The thing about Viagra is that it was initially developed as a medication to help blood flow for people with heart problems. This was a sin blood out. Right. So the side effect was that it helped people get erections who couldn't because of increased blood flow. So essentially what you're doing is you're giving a drug to someone who has a blood flow problem

and can't get an erection, you're fixing that so that they can have sex which then strains the heart. It's like a weird catch-22, it's like your body is telling you you're not healthy enough for sex, but here's like a little pinch to put over it so you can have sex and really overwork it. Yeah, hard listen, you can get some but you might die. Yeah, but it to be fair if you're like 80, that's the way to go, right? And you're like, my junk has worked in years. And then you take this and you're like, I'm going out on top and then you just keel over and die. That's the way to do it.

Right? You want to with that or Hector Salamonka style. Yeah, one of the other. If I'm an old guy, I want to go out either way to boom. All right, don't spoil it Yeah, it's not two years ago this boy. Well, you know, so I saw an interesting thing about the Breaking Bad Finale where They listed the amount of viewers that each season finale got. Yeah. Season one was like 1.3 million, season two was like 1.3 million, season three was like 1.5 million, season four was like 1.8 million, season five was like 2.5 million, and then season six was almost like 10.3. Yeah, it was pretty nuts.

10 million. It went like crazy. They got it sounds impressed, but he heard this before already You saw them in the alley. Yeah, you're in the room when we got told that I didn't hear that Oh, well you must have tuned it out you saw the Bernie came in and told us that like two hours ago So it's like they definitely went out on top. It's like the word about the hit critic Shit, it's like that's it. Just like you fucking drop the mic. You're like that's it done

That's could be that's more than every season combined Probably that's more than every finale combined for five years. They got born one year. Yeah, yeah, we we're catching up We haven't seen it yet. We're like three episodes in the season five. Okay, so we're like 13 episodes away Yeah, we want to finish it as fast as possible before we get spoiled Yeah, it's gonna happen dude Gavin saw me like I was avoiding spoilers left and right So we're like 13 episodes away. We had to finish it as fast as possible before we get spoiled. Yeah, it's gonna happen. Absolutely. Dude, Gavin saw me.

Like, I was avoiding spoilers left and right today. I was covering my ears. I put my headphones. I had to get up and run to the door and shut it at some point. Yeah, I was talking about the whole story. We loudly. I heard him ask all of his office whether they'd seen it. And I was like, yeah, so you just loudly start talking about it.

Mike was going to say anything. I just hear like, and it's just like hear least I talk about it. My friends got off and I just hear like, dude, and it's just like hear background noise. And it starts forming in the words. It's like, all right, I just shut the door. And then Gavin just started laughing his ass off. Michael and I are amazed that no one we follow has spoiled anything.

Well, now that you've just said that, you need to immediately stop looking at it. Literally, we cannot. I've already tweeted about watching Breaking Bad. And people have tweeted at me, spoilers. We cannot look at Twitter until we finish what are they spoilers before like they can't spoil the end before they could have spoiled everything before we saw stupid we just started watching the show like a month ago yeah we the whole season I guess

13 episodes left I mean I guess they could have spoiled any of the five seasons for it. Gavin does Walter White sell math? I so like 20 minutes before the finale Ray had a tweet saying that he had just cut up in the entire series with 20 minutes with 20 minutes before the the finale. Yeah, and I tweeted at him. Oh, chilly. Did they know? I definitely got some replies. I was like, dude, I don't watch that show, but that's fucked up.

You shouldn't have done that. How dare you now I can never enjoy it again. And I was like, that's like episode one, season one. Yeah, that was, that was some, I know, as Heisenberg didn't exist back then. It's like, that was some great fake spoilers last night on Twitter. It was good. I think it was John I was talking to you,

but someone tried to try to tweet him a game of throwing spoiler. And they were like, oh, hey, this is the ending of what happens because of the books. They'd read them. And he was like, actually, no. And he just came up with some crazy bullshit answer. But it was like, no, actually you're wrong. some crazy bullshit answer but was like no actually you're wrong This is what happens in the episode and then this happens and then this person dies and the person responded to him was like what the hell man

That's not cool. I was just joking. He's like are you serious? Yeah, my piece of shit Go fuck yourself. It's funny Oh man, no, I hate that shit though and now that we talked about it we're gonna cut this from the final podcast so that we don't Everything's boiled for us. Yeah, I don't know why people I guess it's that level of The bad news got okay, I will defend some spoils be shut the hell up I spoil a lot of stuff as you're an animal because I get excited and I want to share

You're incredibly dangerous. Yeah, I am amazed how well I've been lately. I guess it's like there with what you haven't been doing well All boiling anything but you've been watching the fucking five-year-old show that's why because it's old That's the only reason you haven't spoiled me something I've spoiled for you recently Yeah, because I'm saying you haven't seen anything new you just haven't had the opportunity to do it You can't spoil breaking bad. It's old everybody's seen it already It's actually the safest spot for her to be is watching old shows. She's at her most dangerous when she's watching things week to week. Watch out when walking dead is coming back because your ass is going to get spoiled. I just get so excited. So did anybody watch the talking bad thing that came on after breaking bad. It's like the Chris did not.

not. So he had like various, I think he had most of the members of the cast on and was talking to him interviewing them. But in addition to all of the cast for Breaking Bad, he also had, I can see how you do, you guys obviously didn't watch it because you didn't watch it. He also had Jimmy Kimmel. What? I don't know. I don't understand why it looks like all the cast is talking to them and Jimmy Kimmel sitting there too. That's with he does that and that happens a lot with talking dead. But nobody is huge is Jimmy Kimmel. That's just like a big celebrity to all like and also he also has his own talk show. Yeah, that's what you could talk to these people and do the same thing. It's like the night. I feel like the night. It's like after the series finale,

the night should be about the breaking bad actors. Like creators. Yeah. And Jimmy Kimmel. And the opinions of Jimmy Kimmel. It didn't even understand it at all. But like after the lost finale, he had a similar thing where he had like a special episode of Jimmy Kimmel, where he had the cast of Lost On and had like a Q&A with them and talked with them and stuff. Did you see Jimmy Kimmel?

And he cried. What? Who you see Jimmy Kimmel? and he cried what? who did? Jimmy Kimmel really? at the beginning of that episode he was like all choked up in theory at the end of last do you want to give him a big fan of the show? yeah you saw Jimmy Kimmel with that whole torquing video right?

that he was the one who moved the motion behind it? yeah I mean it was pretty obviously fake there were candles lit already on the table while she was twerking Or I guess maybe you guys haven't seen it either. I know she's talking about it Yeah, there's a video where the chicken falls over there's a girl is supposedly like making a home cam video of her twerking And she does a handstand on the door to her apartment her roommate opens it she falls onto a table where there's candles already Somehow lit like a leg can't just buy her on fire and it's like Oh, that cut off right after she got on fire so everyone was it was going viral people were like oh my god

How crazy how dumb this woman is don't ever fucking say that again viral it was going viral viral viral Went it was a virus video. You either went viral or didn't sunny kill all of you. Sorry People liked it. People got excited about it and thought it was real and then they released an extended cut on Jimmy Kimmel show and after she catches on fire He comes in with a fire extinguisher and puts her out and is like thanks. Just do a my job. It was all staged. Yeah, staged a fake internet video Yeah, specifically to make people go crazy about it. Uh, so now I don't that's lame. That's lame So now I don't that's lame that's lame You know, I don't understand like people weren't upset about it. It's Jimmy Kimmel pulling a fast one on the internet No, yeah, but yeah Happen more and more but it's not hard. It's like I'm not impressed by Jimmy Kimmel's ability to fake an internet video

Like the guys got like fucking millions of dollars Also, like now he's like shit. He's also like got this like Twitter feud or whatever with Kanye West now. I'm convinced it's fake really I'm convinced that it's another thing Is that what the fuck in what is it what the fuck are people tweeting like all disrespect? I saw right we that the other day I thought all disrespect to Kanye I saw that from right. Yeah, I was like oh well I don't know if that is the bait even about I think Jimmy came up had a skit where he had like little kids read Kanye West tweets and he got Kanye West got mad and had like a series of

ranting tweets against him Josh Groban do a series where he read Kanye's tweets and like a very fancy pronounced way I think so and then at the end Jimmy came old came in with the pink shirt on and he's like it was all stage we did it yeah the fire extinguisher he had a fire extinguishing he sprays it in Connie's face it's just traditional media grasping it's trying to hold on and trying to remain relevant I don't get the joke of it though like fool you it's like all right yeah cool I guess it like it makes you it makes people more jaded and cynical about videos. Like this already that level of cynicism and now anytime you see something and be like,

oh it's probably another big fucking ABC production putting money into it. Are you alright, Gavin? Are you okay? Yeah. Gavin's thinking about what I'm talking about. You're like, you're fucking wobbling your head around and just like let a heavy sigh in the mic. You look like you've been checked out. Yeah, I know, what are you doing? Take it out. You alright? Yeah, I'm just gonna go Yeah, I know. What are you doing? Take it out. You all right?

Yeah, I'm just going to go to sleep, Strafe. Gavin? Yeah. You tired? I'm so tired. I'm not trying very hard at all. Were you out last night? Did you drink?

No, I've just been, my body's just ruined. Why? He's getting a little bit ruined. What's up? I think I got Gavin said. Yeah, I'm going to ruin it some more for you. Oh. Yeah.

You guys are drinking a little more and then you can wrestle afterwards. You want another beer? Yeah. Yeah, here you go. I'll take another one too. Oh, it's a cute little bed. It's six pack and shit. We're out.

Can I get one? Do you have a stick? Do you have a stick? Do you have two sticks over there? We finished one. There should be another one. No, we only have one. It's one next to you, specifically.

Oh, what the fuck? Why don't you tell me that? I went to Costco over the weekend. Shut up. I went to Costco over the weekend. And they had, I'm one thing about this because Shut up, get in the fuck. I went to Costco over the weekend and they had, I'm gonna think about this because I see you guys drinking blue moon. They had a 24 pack of blue moon

that had like all these different, you wanna open her? I got it. I think it's just, varieties and flavors of blue moon that I'd never seen. And one of them was a spiced caramel apple. Interesting. Blue moon. That sounds really good.

Yeah, it's really good. The best one was, that one that was like a red ale. That wasn't very good. I didn't think, but they had a pumpkin ale. That was awesome. That sounds top. It's like the best thing about this time of year is pumpkin everything. It's true. Pumpkin spice lattes and Starbucks. Pumpkins and bread. Pumpkins. It's so popular that you walk into Starbucks now and their doors just say PSL. You know where it's like shit. Yeah, it just say PSL. You know it's like Shit, yeah, it's like it's like LL

You want it bitch? We got it for the next two months only pumpkin pie is one of my favorite foods ever It's so delicious. It's not a huge cake eater, but I love pumpkin pie My favorite is to bring over pumpkin pies for Thanksgiving and I would hoard one for myself I was like fuck you family. This is my pie and I'd hide it in the house Yeah, that's what I would eat. I'm a little fat. I hide it I would do that. I was a little fat, but I'd also get a tub of cool whip too So I just put the entire thing on top of the pie and just fucking eat it. Yeah, you know how you do it We were the ready-whip family. We use the cans

No, no fucking cool it man. I'm way better than ready-whip Well, because no cool it sucks. What is cool it cool it's whipped cream cool whip comes in a little tub and like you scoop it out with a spoon Oh, I already went in the aerosol exactly no ready. We have to hundred times better. It's way better Yeah, yeah, I think Team nice couch. We know what we're doing Compy couch team comfy couch come on Well, it's nice done on my Compressed air mixed in with your dessert shit Gus and I just take that spoon and go it tastes way better And you can like draw shit way easier. You can make smiley faces

Yeah, you just you just like push you put it in your mouth, but it's running out and it's push it up She's left spray cheese is free cheese is I've never heard of spray cheese Exactly cheese in a can imagine like that came yeah, imagine the exact thing but cheese comes out What can't you put into an aerosol nothing steak You haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't seen this before, you haven't open. So I made the mistake of trying to go to it yesterday. Man, I just wanted to fucking murder everyone in the world when I went there because it was so fucking crowded. It's like the aisles are narrow to begin with. They're like narrow enough for like two carts to pass each other. But there were so many people in there that the cart that the aisles were essentially two lines of carts. Jesus. Yeah, it was fucking like this. Trader Joe's. It is it? It's like, it's like, they're

popular in the West Coast and California. It's like a grocery store. Okay. Um, but it was worth it because I bought this, this, this brand of butter there called carry gold butter, which I had some friends of mine talk about forever. They went to Ireland. They're like, in Ireland, this butter called carry gold, they sell it at Trader Joe's you got to buy it So I went there to get this butter It is the best thing in the world. Yeah, like I bought some bread to and I just went home

I was like how good this butter be it was like oh my god. How is it better than normal butter? Yeah, how can you know no it's like soft? I believe you and More delicious like has a more creamy It's like a buttery biscuit base to it kind of yeah, I could see that I believe you People like to talk about a food right like this place is a me whether it's like Like a grocery store you can buy this thing or like a restaurant like it's most amazing together And you get it and like rarely is it as good as people hype it up to be there's a place Gavry you agree with me where Jeffff has been talking about from most of the

name of my crazy person there's a place just talking about for their terrible butter and i was like okay i'll go there i'll go there and to barbecue place nearby and there's another super super well known barbecue place franklin's barbecue fantastic barbecue but the line is like always four hour long time so jeff was like others is placed that you know know is basically like Franklin's this is where it is And this is what it's called and we're like hey, uh, but we never went there for the long time

We went there maybe like a month and a half ago. We've been there like six times since it is the best barbecue I've ever had in my life like lines usually not that bad. The lines amazing I won't tell people about it because it's so friggin good And I don't want people going there best brisket best food ever like like we'll tell you about it afterwards And open keg for you while you wait for you shut up that that that thought you're gonna Don't give details out. Okay shut the hell up. Oh wow Hey, it's a Cheg it's 50 bucks for the knowledge. Yeah

But it's like it's like I've never seen such a reaction out of person like you know a lot of times It's 50 bucks for the knowledge. Yeah, shut the hell up. But it's like, I've never seen such a reaction out of a person. You know, a lot of times you're like, oh, it's really good. And then they get it and like, oh, it's all right. I mention this place and Ryan just goes, oh, you're the best. Every time. It's a total brisket feed.

Yeah, it did every time. I'll be like, hey guys, I was thinking to go into so-and-so. Anybody want in? And like the last time, Ray was like, I'm good. And Jeff's like, I'm gonna go to lunch with Griffin today, but get a little bit extra and I'm sure I'll have some. I'm like Ryan and he was like, Ryan get him in the situation. I was like, Jesus! He was already digging a hole to put it in.

Dude, Ryan was like counting the seconds until he came back. You know certain people who they watch the Food Network and it's like they're watching porn and they get way to into it? That's Ryan. But only with this place. I've never seen a reaction out of a human like Ryan to this place. Yeah I don't like that though. I don't like when people are really into food. Why why would you not like it? I just don't see that I just see that fucking delicious. I know it's good, but I mean this food you never Yeah, it's cool. That's like what's the point of living? Why don't you decide about food? I need so I don't die that day We have you have you had something that tastes so good that it's like almost Metaphorically or gaz make you're like oh

If you could offer me this if you could say here we go you never have to eat again, but you'll never starve I would absolutely take that of course because you're lazy Gavin can't taste like different liquors. He doesn't know what the difference is to I have like four tastes Yeah, it's like what are your four tastes? Yucky yummy alcoholic Spicy Yucky yummy alcohol and so we make a chart of that a tongue in the regions so it can be in the yummy or the yucky Depending on what food is how much and how much there is salt on its own yucky

Jeff and Griffin are trying to explain this to like apparently they'll give Gavin stuff with like extra salt or spice and he can't tell He's just like oh, dude food is good if I like it I'm all I can taste for it spicy. I can taste where is alcoholic. I can taste where they're like Gavin claims He can't taste the difference between like eight different When someone like has a little sample of something so yeah, yeah, yeah, really bitter that isn't it's like What yeah, sure? Yeah, that's weird like we're broken my buds are broken I I actually don't I think my brain doesn't process that's not normal

Like you know how you go? Are you always going on and on about how like your your dick skin is like to protect your dick and how like you say other Dicks are broken. That's right. Because they've already broke that's like your tongue skin is like to protect your dick and how like you say other dicks are broken. That's right, cause they've been- Solidarity, bro. That's like your tongue, your tongue's like broken. You can't taste it. It's the worst.

It's the worst. You just get no pleasure out of eating food. I'm like, oh, I'm like, I'm like, what's that got to do with my food? I'm saying it's equivalent to like, you say other people's dicks can't feel shit. Like I have a working tongue and yours is broken and sucks. Yeah yeah, you should love food. I who does a fucking delicious? I went to a steakhouse in Orlando and

When I was there for vacation and they had a dessert like they had a dessert with like typical things like crème brûlée Tiramisu whatever like all this normal bullshit Gavin Spamman each dessert had like a detailed description under it and then there was one thing on the dessert menu that just said the lemon. And I was like, okay. Lemon party? Yeah, I was like, I want to have a lemon party. Yeah, where's the bed? So the waiter comes over, he's like, can I introduce you in dessert? And I was like, what's the lemon? He's like, oh, well, it's our signature dessert here. He said, we take a lemon, we scoop out all of the innards, here. He said, we take a lemon, we scoop out all of the innards and we boil the lemon rind in sugar water for four hours. Then using the inside of the lemon, we make a sort of lemon sorbet and a lemon cream. And then once we boil the the rind for four

hours, we take it out, cool it, stuff it with the sorbet and the cream, and we bring it out, we cut it, we serve it for you, you eat the entire lemon. So it's a lemon, but how big is it? It's like, it's a normal lemon. It's pretty small. You just described a lemon. I can't. Okay, I'll try.

Would you pick up a lemon and bite the rind? No. If I add a fucking lemon, they bring it out, they cut it, they serve it to you. It's like candy. It was the most delicious thing ever. It was like, we said, would you eat raw cow? Yeah. Probably not. You'd probably want it cooked, serve it to you. It's like candy. It was the most delicious thing ever. It was like me saying, would you eat raw cow? Yeah. Probably not.

You probably want it cooked, right? I would. Yeah, but how could you ever hear anyone cooking a lemon or having a procedure where you can cook? Lemon survey, yeah. Also, would you take a bite out of a cow, fur and all? Yes. That's what I'm asking.

No, you wouldn't, but this is like a lemon. This is like you prepare the entire thing. Nothing is wasted. I take it back. The little green leaf on the end is wasted They don't put it on Like he like dissect it like a fucking surgeon like for you at the tea was like cut how much did you pay for that lemon 10 bucks? Yeah How much did you pay for that lemon 10 bucks? Yeah, it was awesome. Oh, I got it

It's a dessert they can pay Who cares what it started as it matters what it's on it for four hours I would pay 250 an hour for someone to make me a dessert sure that sounds too tart for me But it does sound cool. It wasn't hard. No, not at all really. Well, they put it sugar What yeah, according to the guys yeah, have you seen people who have like actual Flakes of gold or sheets of gold put on their desserts so that they can eat said gold in their dessert Is that real is that like the crap they put in the booze? Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was in beer fest

Do gets wasted off of it and he has like gold all over his face Was it super bad as well? I think so. It smashes his life all over the floor What is up with you and slow mo? It's all you talk about all time. I can mention a lot So I finally got my five s. Oh, you did yeah, where is it? I saw Esther got a gold watch Yeah, yeah, she's really happy with it. Yeah, I got the great one like I don't care Well, you know the themo is is interesting on it So it can do like up to 120 frames a second If you take a video and nothing's moving it's like a normal 30 frame a second

But as soon as there's like a lot of action it like ramps it down you can move it though What do you mean you can move by the slowmo? Oh, yeah, I guess you can yeah There's like a slider and then like it but it automatically detects motion. We'll like slow it down there and then when like the motion stops it like goes back to normal again. I mean it's it's not like snowball guys quality only only 120 frames a second which isn't really that full. I had a I had a phone about four years ago that did 120 frames. I remember that it looked like a camera. Yeah there's a phone though. There's LG. It was that was the selling point It was I don't think I ever saw that phone for sale in the US. Yeah, the US was really behind on phones for a long time

Man, you know, we got the iPhone now. Yeah No, it's it's cool, but like with most slow mo you're never gonna use that so you need a lot of light Yeah, even for 120 frames a second. It's like man, it's really dark. Yeah, think about how I feel when I'm doing 10,000 Faves it was funny on the set of the gauntlet I just in first video with her phone and slumber was of Gavin Yeah, so it was pretty meta so she uploaded that video to her channel anyone's like man Gus looks annoyed He looks like he's not paying attention. It's because I had fart hoover on my 3ds Look at me in that video. I have my 3ds out I had fart hoofa on my 3ds

Look at me in that video. I have my 3ds out You You just scratch your head like You know, I'm like looking at him. They're like trying to figure it out and blame into a bean fart hooper But like I didn't realize she was recording a video at the time Otherwise, I would have acted like a very hard worker What do you mean a dick? I would have been more interested, but I was like I had fart hoover on my screen. I was like he's here He's somewhere near bomb like you mother fuckerer that's got this neutral phase anyways is annoyed

It was it was fun hanging out with those guys for a week though. I've met all those guys before I think Freddie and justine You fucked up. I just Jesus what she knows gone 200 bathroom. Yeah, I like I really like them I had a really good time with I just find they're really cool Yeah, dude. They're like real people guys No, it was it was a blast. I also liked having them on the podcast I wish we had brought them on earlier so we could have spent more time with them on last podcast I felt like I felt bad like I was trying to rush. It's like a little hot stuff. It's through all of them

When is a gauntlet episode? Read come and come about October 20th I think October 20th yeah I'm there you tell him you're right now okay that was really works out same same time she was saying I'm gonna go on a limb top top it was top it was fun it was fun it'll be fun I think I'll be funny the shoot was really organized yeah it was easy you go out you do your thing I was really hard we did a lot of work shut up like you play your game and they're like okay come here we're gonna film you wait relax for a few play your game and they're like, okay, come here. We're gonna film you.

Wait, relax for a few minutes. But yeah, and everyone had like games cases. Yeah. And everyone was playing the game. And there's any behind the scenes, it's all people playing GTA 5. Everyone was like, every room is no one wanted spoilers.

Yeah. Or actually, we were all in, so you all had your own, well, whatever. I don't want to give, I can't explain it without you. Everybody had different areas. Everybody had have different areas everyone was in their area We got games cases facing away from each other. Yeah, so that they wouldn't have spoilers and there was playing GTA 5 Oh right across the kind of cross the can come on Jesus and she's back

No, it's like I never well the funny thing is you just wrap up You just want to leave the room piss your pants and then come back I've stood outside and peed I power pushed cool. Oh shit. What's the last room, piss your pants, and then come back? I've just stood outside and peed. I power pushed. It's cool. Was the last time you pissed your pants? I don't know, last time I pissed my pants was long time. I've not even ashamed to say it.

It was like a couple years ago, because I had a really long road trip, and I was trying to make it home because I started running out of gas. And didn't quite make it to the bathroom. So you just pissed in your car? No, no. I was standing, but just a little bit came out and I was like, oh, oh no. How sad. So you started peeing a little bit and stopped?

Yeah, I like forced myself. I was like, no, bladder, not yet. And then I waited to go inside my apartment. You sprinkled. Yeah, you keep saying that can't be good. It's fine. It's not good to hold it a piss. Is that how you develop it?

There's holding in a piss and there's stopping a piss. Stop it a piss conversation. It's just stopping a piss is totally different though. Yeah, but it stinks. No, not if you stop it. What? If you, if you're peeing and you like grab your dick. If you're like,

if you're pissing, then stop. If you're pissing and you like grab your dick and pinch it, like stepping on the end of a hose, yes, that's what you're talking about. You can physically just like, clinch it also and stop peeing. And that doesn't seem. It feels like you're trying to fall off.

Can you stop peeing? You guys are crazy. No, I'm not crazy. No, not really. If I'm standing too. So you can happily, I can literally just go and stop peeing. And it's just like, you turn the fall off. Yeah, but then would you,

would you then be able to go about your day? For me it is. And with half a tank, and see, yeah, that is a meadow Me when I start I have to finish yeah, well I don't you stop What would you be is it's hard? It's really difficult I do it. It hurts thing though. It does no If you pinch it if there's like there's like ultimate situation where like I got a pee I got a pee and then like you start running for the bathroom

And then it's like all I'm gonna piss before I get there So you like grab your ween and like pinch it maybe before you get to the bathroom That's like you let go and it's a part of a loss That's like that but I agree with you that's like a fire hose like I'd hurts if I don't go If there's like I'm gonna going to stop being, that's totally different. You know, if you, if you have your finger over a balloon and it's full of water and you squeeze the balloon, it kind of like fills up the neck of the balloon. Yeah.

Yeah. I imagine that with like, like, you pinch the end of your knob and your knob in flames. That's what I'm imagining right now. Well, no, here's the thing is you pinch the base before the knob. Oh, you can't pinch the base of your knob. Well, you can. You can. Just pinch on, well, you don't know. Don't add in anything. I just pinch on well, you don't know don't add in it You don't know what you stay out of this you're not involved in this conversation

Have you ever heard of retrograde ejaculation? No, what is that? Gus immediately You were you were on your iPad and you're like what is happening? So apparently it gots is jar I heard ejaculation. I'm awake. That's a single retrograde It was a retrograde that really disturbed it There's a say you can do apparently some people find it quite pleasurable I've never done it because I'm weird about my knob and no I really have never done it sure He knows a guy but apparently if you do what you're talking about there and as you jizz you

Literally stop your cock from letting it out because the way the valve moves like the valve will go over the other way So you can't piss. Yeah. So like, cheers will do once. Cheers will come up into your cock, but then like build in your cock because it can't come out. It forces the valve back over and all the cheers, like shoots backwards

into your bladder. Why would you want to do that? And apparently some people do that. Why? I don't know, it sounds like a bloody lunatic would do. Are you trying to let us out? How do you bring that up? Because we're talking about like what's the

thing? That is just holding the bass of his dick. I didn't see anything. You got a retro. No, no, no. I'm going to bring this up. I'm going to bring this up. P and I'm going to start with a what is it going to be a better segue to retro

great ejaculation? I'm talking about holding a P story. That's your mind. That's your mind. Like with your mind, like you're in the middle of P and then you will yourself. I'm not talking about Jesus in your own fix. That's what I'm talking about. It would never be possible to talk about.

Do you have like will it in your bladder too? No, it just like it can't go anywhere. So it goes in your bladder. I literally thought you're going to say that you can start ejaculating and then stop yourself. Like in the midst of you coming, you're like, OK, that's enough. No, your boos will be pumping jizz and it will be going into your bladder

Whoa god damn Fucking Google retrograde You go retrograde. I'm going to show an extra of bloody jizz going back to the party. Yeah, I'm sure there's a little bit of a guy going up. Yeah, and they're going to worse. Gavin, when he comes out, come on. No real blood. Funny though.

Just English blood. Did you guys, I mean, I'm sure you guys have, I don't know what the policy is. There we go. UK, but sex education, how early you guys had it in school. Did you get that lesson? No, sex education. Did you get that lesson? Sex education and sex aren't the same thing, guys.

I think with me it was in ninth grade, so it was 14 or 15? I was sixth. No. I'm also much older than you, so I had it in year six. Yeah, I want to say six or seven. Which is the equivalent of the fifth grade. In fifth grade, where we separated the boys from the girls, so they could learn about their parts respectively. in high school I had a friend and they opened up the last segments of the whole sex ed to questions so you could submit an anonymous question so you wouldn't have to show that it was yourself and set it in and of course because I'm an asshole my friends are assholes

He goes is it normal to bleed when I masturbate and the woman read it and she goes is it normal to Okay, so Wow didn't answer it. Yeah, just blue right pass. You have another question Yeah, we like what if there was like a medical issue It's like all right next question and some kid in the back like seriously Do you want to answer that question? I mean just like everyone probably wants to know what, John, do you want to answer that question? Yeah. I mean, just like everyone probably wants to know.

What happens to the questions you don't answer? Yeah. He's raising his head, his coveted blood. She said. So, we had to get back. The sex that I had was in seventh grade, so I was either 12 or 13. But, I took health in ninth grade, which is what I was getting confused with. Yeah.

That's going to fall over. So, in our health class, they made during the reproduction portion of health, they had us read out loud from the book, like so they would go down the aisle and people had to read from the book to the class because it was a coach teaching healthy. They're not real teachers. And-

Don't have sex, if you have sex, you're gonna come with you and you'll die. This girl in my class started reading. She was the first one of the day actually, and it's like we're reading what the reproductive system, and she didn't know how to say penis. So every time it said penis in the book, she said penis. And I'll never forget that to this day.

Sitting there in my class and hearing this girl say, pen is so hard and over. How does she know how to let this guy, is no one gonna stop her? How do you ever, also, again, because my friends were assholes in high school and because I was one of them, we would put things, like, especially sexual things or things from our textbook

into the Mac processor, so whatever the speech would come back. And we'd say things like, I'd like a dildone, I would like a dildo, please. Yeah, I did that all the time. Yeah, that was the question that got asked when I did sex education, is, we didn't have an anonymous question, someone just raised their hat, raised their hat, and they were like, so what's a dildo then?

Because they're, I guess they're expecting that. Yeah, why not? But didn't come up. They were actually going to learn about dildos. They just knew the word dildo, but didn't really know it was. I assumed we'd be told about dilday. It was a nice solid last 15 minutes. It was a roller coaster. It was rock hard. I'm going to pass out. You know sometimes you want to go drinking after this? Let's go drink. Yeah. Come on. No way. We can pre-enact the wrestling.

Don't be a baby. I'll feed you three more drinks. You hear about people dying and it's like yeah, they were just feeling weird and then they just died. I it would happen tonight for me. Yeah. Yeah. Dude, he's been weird this whole podcast, right? Yeah. People have been commenting that you look like you're ready to pass out. Yeah, you're just weird. I feel good. Let's go drinking. So I want to thank everyone for joining us. We're back on Wednesday with an episode of the patch and next Monday with another RT podcast. Huddled. Bye. Bye. Cuz it's still the master walk I've been, hacks a fool like those who are tricked into jack's green pool Everything is cool, when Bernie hits the boss, like dropping LSD, then jerking dolphins off

Everybody's yelling, and he gets ridiculous, like moving furniture with brand-in and Chris The show was really funny, and it's never hit missed The funny is group in, all attacks is, hope you win, formed, honk, current, gaming events And show you how to tick people that touch an an electric fence Michael doesn't yell like it doesn't rage quit Everybody loves Rooster Teeth cause they are the shit Describe the show to a newcomer in a more familiar way. Do you like apples? Example.

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