Rooster Teeth Podcast - RT Podcast #298

Episode Date: November 19, 2014

RT Discusses Dating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's time to put your pedal to the metal. From the twisted minds behind Deadpool and Zombieland, an executive producers will learn that an Anthony Mackie comes a new Peacock original series, Twisted Metal, a high-octane action comedy based on the classic video game series. Anthony Mackie stars as John Doe, a motormouth outsider who must deliver a mysterious package across a post-apocalyptic wasteland. If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnett, and Thomas Hayden Church. Twisted metal, streaming now only on Peacock. This podcast is brought to you by Blue Apron. Blue Apron sends gourmet recipes

and all the fresh ingredients you need to make them right to your door. To see what's on the menu this week, visit blueaprin.com. Our listeners get their first two meals free. Just go to blueaprin.com slash rooster teeth. Blueaprin.com slash roostert. Blueaprin.com slash roostert. This is episode of the Roostertique podcast sponsored by Finders Keepers Creations. Test and ParaCord bracelets and more.

With literally tens of thousands of combinations, you can make something really special for yourself or it's a gift. Support this podcast and get 10% off in first order. Use the code podcast2 at finderskeeperscreations.com. What's up? Listen, the other room that's like five seconds! How you guys doing?

Four seconds! Welcome to another episode of the RESTYTHCAT. Three seconds! I'm Brandon. I'm Blaine, we went out of work. This is weird. I'm also Brandon. I'm Adam.

I wanted to introduce you guys, but apparently that's not how you do it. Gus yelled at me the last time. I had no idea. Nobody, nobody. I mean, is there anybody? I wonder if there's anyone out there in the audience who doesn't know who we all are. Please tweet me. Okay, I know that you too. I can just hear them rejoicing me and Brandon are back on pocket. But if they don't know who I am, how can they tweet me? Oh my god, oh Fuckin main system. So we got here 30 minutes early and it was the biggest mistake ever because we kept talking about stuff And I felt like gossos like stop talking Stopping and you would stop us. We had the best podcast But before we I want to get to the bottom of something because it was sort of like, we had this deal

where Jack held this thing. And he made lots of money for charity. And that was great. It was a great thing. And then, so Adam got pit, Jack got pit, Adam got pissed. There's a kitty. So many, once a kitty, Adam got pissed. There's a kitty. Oh, yeah, so many once a kitty

Adam got a kitty from a fan who's gonna send you a free kitty now everyone hates each other's guts No, well that doesn't tell you everything Apparently there's a free bangle kitty at which a bangle kitty is a very expensive kitty and Now like there's text messages everyone's pissed everyone wants the kitty apparently Adam gets the kitty and and and people Jack or was upset about Adam getting the kitty. Yeah, and Adam came to my office like Joel. We need just like we need to like get we need to raise money around the office So Jackie came like we can't fucking we're not raising money for Jackie. I felt bad So you try to compete with goodwill It was it was like like listen

The cat was donated by a fan who wanted to donate it on the live stream to one of the people at whose chief Mm-hmm generate donations Basically like Jack was like it was for you. I'm just like I'm just a kid. He's so much of it And I was like what and he's like like, there's a kidy that's almost in it. And I was like, what? And he's like, so much to do in a bangle cat. And I was like, really? I, I want a bangle cat. And I was just quiet. And Jack's like, oh, no, no, I'm gonna take, I'm gonna take the bangle cat. You, uh, you should have helped Jack move. Apparently, uh, that is a lot of pull with his drop it, right? And I apologize. Uh, and, and then basically me and Jack argued, I was pretty drunk. And we argued over who would make the better cat dad and

That's how you have the fans by I thought you had a pole and then we opened it up And you just have the picture of the pole and it's like who should get the cat Jack Adam and you just see my bar filling up and Jackson My so I won by a landslide because the because of the graph Because the graphic that they made in that room over there No, no, No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no cat jack, I would like a cap, you can have it. No, man, you should take a hook-up with Kim later. I'm like, all right, I'm going to go to Australia. I talked to you. And I found out later that he was pretty upset about it.

And are you getting any text messages? No, it was basically just fine. Hasn't you, we have those text messages? We have a pick-up. No, I'm kidding. No, I can't choose. No. And basically, I felt really bad, because I didn't realize how much you wanted the cat, but

I also wanted the cat. And I sort of felt like maybe I took it away from him. So I wanted to figure out a way to like buy him another cat. Obviously, the lady didn't want to give us another free cat. I kind of felt that one. Well, she just gave her one free cat. She wasn't into it. Into it.

And so now today, you were very pissed because now, now, he is also getting a kitty. Yes. And you don because now now is also getting a kitty. Yes. And you don't like that he's getting a kitty and he wants you to wait. That is totally not the story. He wants you to wait a week so that they can ship both kitties together at the same time. Basically Kim. Kim, you're not having a cat.

Kim email Jack and she's like, hey, I have a cat and had a birth defect and basically it's like a scarred and because it's a bangle cat, I can't sell it as a show kitten so if you want I can give you this cap of free and all you do is pay shipping and shipping is like $300 this is this is why cute animals will be the end of a zole and and my cat is coming on November 29th at 8 15 pm I have my time you took time off time off from work time off and I'm ready to get my goddamn cat I have I have a fucking cat in my car. I was going to play a practical joke on you where I was going to get to the airport before you

and I was going to get like a, I was like, I was asking the question, what can I use as a prop as a dead cat? Oh my God, that would be so fun. It's my foot in there. Hey, that's my kitty. That is my kitten at a very young age. This is like a proud mom.

He's like, you're like my sister. You were showing everybody pictures of that. Dude kitten at a very young age. This is like a proud mom He's like you're like my sister you were showing everybody pictures of that dude. I could like animal Excited fucking ugly. What would you do? You got it. That is fucking horribly ugly What would you do if you got that cat and he was just a huge asshole? He's not gonna be I'm pretty good with animals with you share with you Adam said today Adam said today no Joel I can't wait a week Because I Adam said today, no, Joel, I can't wait a week because I have to bond with the kitty before it's too late. If there is a budget button, yeah.

That's, that's, she knows, like basically for some reason, Kim was very much like, you have to get within, like just after eight weeks, you're gonna, you gotta take it. So between these three days, you must take it. I feel like to me, you need to spend a week with Jackson. And then I figured, and I figured like that was like an important time for the cat I guess it's not but basically it boils down to Jack wants me to put postpone my date for my kitty a week So he can just get free shipping and it's like the lady's giving us $24 worth of cats You can get a little bit of goddamn money like I just want my goddamn cat, but I'm probably gonna do it anyway I can't you did not say no listen to this podcast. I don't know

I cannot say no. What's what's its name? I have an idiot. I want to meet it. I have some preliminary names. Tony man What if it's an asshole? That's right. I mean, and lately that answers your own question. Yeah, but there's different like levels of asshole cat There are different levels of asshole cat. It's true I mean, it's amazing to me that cats only have one asshole I mean in nature they should just like have them all over their bodies Just like picking up things from every port. That's that's that's a horrible thing You said you wanted a monkey, right? Yeah, you're asking me you're asking me if there was a pet that I could have that's like not a

Nornary pet like a squirrel monkey top of the not a ordinary pet. I was like like a squirrel monkey top of the Head I thought my head was like a monkey dude. Do you do not want a monkey? That's why you're right now Didn't cook me a fucking joke about it. You you told me you have like a fear of monkeys Yeah, dude are you fucking kidding me? Supposedable thumbs and teeth and anger. Are you seeing like a sutura dude? There was a guy and I don't even want to get into this Get into it man. There was a guy in Los Angeles oh fuck it's so horrible don't they go right for the genitals he was attacked yeah by a chimpanzee and it's just sort of like

every horrible thing that your brain can conceive about how that would go down went down bad I hear they go for the generals they everything just just ever just what would you do the month eyes and I'd apparently like uh hit like there was a girl that was in the cage with them at the same time and that's also the chip protective of the girl that's the point who the fuck knows right I mean it's so I mean the chip could have just been like I'm just gonna go fuck that guy I was like no fucking stop me and that's what happened. And I feel bad for that guy, you know. I actually want to seeing him like a year later. Was he a friend? Yeah, he was a friend. I didn't know him, but like you heard the story in the news and then I went to like a convention in Vegas like a

car convention like a monkey survival convention and a monkey survival convention. monkey survival convention and I Based on the new story I knew who it was him or whatever You have to be careful what you talk about like you mentioned Lord monkey is gonna be like if he was back I would be like I'm just gonna fucking bomb every be like I'm just gonna fucking bomb every vizu. Fuck all, fuck all, fuck all, fuck all, fuck all, monkey. You fucking damn 38. I couldn't, I don't know. I mean again, it's like if you wanted to get like what an, if you had an animal attack

you and, and kill you, what animal would it be? A tiger. A bear. Not a chimpanzee. No chimpanzees are fucking scared, but the thing about monkeys is like even in a good case scenario, they're throwing their poop at you. That's true, right? There's no winning.

Yeah, there's no winning. You get bit and you get an infection. You get a bit and a STD. You have to try to monkey though. Don't they have monkeys that help people who are blind or are deaf or they do. I'm monkeys. Yeah. I do.

They have like helper monkeys. Is that true? I think. I mean I think I would like one of them I mean I think that was like one in a sign fell episode, but it wasn't Champions League right it was like the cute furry monkey like I'll all deal with the spider monkey I mean yeah, I know it was probably a spider monkeys. I'll deal with the spider monkey spider monkey cute Probably gonna get a bolo That's fine. I'd rather get a bola than be like physically attacked by chimpanzee, right?

Spider-Man gays are kind of cute. They're almost like fluffy like cats that aren't assholes. You want to like a red ass baboon? I will joy if you had to have an animal that wasn't like a traditional pet would be. I'm so actually so glad you asked me this question. I saw a documentary last night on beavers. I saw an hour long documentary on beavers and I still don't know what the fuck they eat. Like I don't know do they eat wood? No they don't. They don't eat wood. They're doing something with something with wood right bevers are doing something with wood like they I think they eat the wood like they I think they they're not on the wood. It doesn't matter man. Beaters are the fucking they are the shit

Yeah, they're like new collar workers They're cute of the animal there. They're fluffy. They like they like build little thing They build they build the building games like you know know they're like I'm gonna go build a house Giant rodent teeth that bite through trees will fuck you up. Yeah, but no I mean have you ever heard of a story of a beaver attacking anyone ever I guarantee that There's shit fucked up. I be even That is I'm looking at this wait wait

No, don't wait If I look at beaver attacks it's something else What else are we talking about before we were talking about that sports games and Halloween parties and I can oh Let's talk about it real quick the River tax pulls man off of kayak Skins him alive no, no, really they human flesh. I didn't know that The rooster cheetah video game the first video game we made came out last week. Are there any beavers in it? No back at least I was I was I was on a DLC I was on a date Joel Joel left

You guys miss half naked Joel Our idea if you make hoodies design an engineer a hoodie that when you take it off I just pull your shirt off with yeah, no, no, no, exactly right. I mean we put a man on the fucking moon Can we do that? Yeah, they have zipper on them. Fucking different zippers in the front. Oh my god Just hook it off. I was I was on a date in the girls asking like, oh, where do you work? You know like what's your office like? And I was like well, I thought at my phone and I showed her live-action offices Was this was it the live-tweeted date that you told us about was this the first date that you went out

This was a girl to see interstellar on the first date Not allowed to talk about her stellar oh It's not allowed to talk about it. Oh, yeah, it's a No movie it's a three hour fucking movie. I didn't I don't want to do three hours It was like an impulsive thing I thought it'd be cool. It was like, you know, we were gonna meet up later that week anyways It's like long gonna movies and I want you to meet up, you know, we can go movies man, so yeah, sure and then as soon as I told Brandon like yeah, I'm gonna head out tonight and I you know going movies and music

There's still are some worse. Yeah, Jason Yeah, Jason, they were like what the worst date movie that's the way it's really Blaine proceeded to text the girl man my friends say this is like the worst date movie that's the one because it's really Blaine proceeded to text the girl man my friends say this is like the worst date movie ever This is gonna be so awkward. I didn't say Zacher is just being transparent. It wouldn't great She she caught things in that movie that I didn't she was she was smart Matthew McConaughey's in it and girls Matthew McConaughey Right he is very dreaming. He pilot he is a good movie wait he's a pilot in that let's not talk about it

I don't want to know see now it's three hours long bad date movie has Matthew McConaughey in it he's a good pilot great date movie because you can assess great date movie he assess how like you know how they retain information how quick they are you started live tweeting the date right well I didn't know how well the one thing that girls love on a date is when you're on your phone I don't know I was not my phone at all most of them there they're there do you just take a lot of bathroom breaks? No, no, no so most of them were when she wasn't all the all of them were when she wasn't around So like she was either I was waiting for her and you were like you were assessing her like based on her

Interpretation of the movie., here we go sort of like Oh, they're done, but no You don't have been a great cover just say oh, it's my mom No, cuz you don't get on your phone during a date. I'm not that much an asshole But yeah, like if she went to the bathroom I'd be like oh gonna make a quick thing or we were driving to meet up at a coffee shop and I made another Tweet and we went on a second date and I was like I'm gonna hold off I'm doing live tweeting And stuff and I'm sure she won't like you know

I'll tell her later down the road if we if we were continuing to talk that I made all those tweets and she texted me last night She's on our deathbed as it's me last night. She said like hashtag first dates with Blaine, huh? And I was like oh fuck like she found him. She's cool about it Are you still gonna see her again? Yeah, we're gonna be on Tuesday Jesus can we pull up her Twitter profile? No Well, it's cool. What's the smart handle? I'm not how did she how did you find your own Twitter? Hmm She doesn't know a lot about Rupertie so she's doing some research

So if we look through your most recent followers, we look for a girl that's not on Twitter She said if you google Rupertie then blame my Twitter's the first thing that pops up. So she found out through that and she I took a picture on her second date. We went to Elfin, Elfin Room, like the Jazz Place. I was gonna post that but I didn't and she wanted to see that photo and she ended up seeing everything. So yeah. How do you feel about that? I was really embarrassed and I felt like I'm like an asshole because Because it seemed like oh, I'm caught red handed and I was like well, I was gonna tell you but like you know No, he's gonna believe that but I was gonna tell her

So yeah, I mean Adam you made a thing earlier where you were like I don't even know how much I can get into this Well, Adam may or may not I don't even know how much I can get into this. Well, Adam may or may not, I can't even get into this. Well, you can get into this context clues. What's what's going on? I can't get into this back myself into a corner. Yeah. All right. So you're getting a kitty.

So, um, so we made a video game. We released it and it's really cool, but it's crazy because of how accurate it is for our office Like it's you're going around you like that's exactly what that hallway looks that's exactly what the office looks like Except there's one thing that they didn't take note of So we have like AC ducks that aren't exactly Attached to our office. It's funny because when I saw it, that was, I was acutely like that was like a, that's like a cute pain like knowing we all know were the vent ducts. Yeah. Go in the every, every person who works in this building knows exactly where every

air conditioning duct goes, originates from where it is. It's, I've worked in three offices with now, and we finally moved over to soundcheck and we have our own AC It's the best fucking thing ever. It's the first time. You guys have such a nice office We went to the annex in the old office. We went to like a warehouse that was like 40 degrees in the winter and 120 degrees in the summer and you guys left and you guys upgraded Yeah, it's pretty good except for Jeremy and Matt are there And you guys left and you guys upgraded. Yeah, it's pretty good except for Jeremy and Matt are there. Which makes it horrible.

We were going to install the vents inside the offices, but Aaron couldn't wait. So he sliced a hole through the roof. That's what happened to everyone. With the thought of like, well, if I slice a hole through the roof, they're obviously going to put it on the front burner and fix it. And we did it. And finally, we got around to fixing all the roofs.

But since he tore a whole hole through his all we could do is basically like drop the entire vent into the ceiling of the office so it just looks like this giant alien that's like peeking through the roof and like that the pounds that's what we've been that was me and I had the curve me and Nams office is the same way they just dropped it through and we just have this big tube sticking down. It's so creepy. But we didn't know that we've been using that giant industrial fan.

No complaints about the two. Our office gets fucking hot. And now that they've cut the hole and you have direct airflow, you can feel why. Because it's like someone blowing lightly on your face. Yeah, it's karma though, because he cut that hole and it's both his desk and now that they dropped it in, it's pointing directly on top of him

and it's been really cold in the office lately. So today he was just like blasted with air. I would love that. Like in one of the original offices, we had the situation where it was like a AC unit from like 1962 and during the summer, it would blow warm air on you. And then basically that old air conditioning unit

was a mechanism that turned air into water. And then the water would just go straight down onto our server room. Do you remember that? It was just literally just, and it had leaked through the roof, through the board, through the ceiling, and it was just like a controlled shower. Like if you're ever in the apocalypse,

and you're like, I just need a mechanism for a shower, just like find all the AC units, it just turn, because they just turn air into water. Is this rock oven, you know, or is this Conor Sons? The downtown, yeah. In Ralph, I'm in Aido, right under our network closet, I'm right above our network closet,

was the upstairs bathroom, brilliant, does it? Wow. Am I way loud on the mic? wow yeah and my way loud on the mic intelligent my way loud on the mic system system's out there yeah so I think the solution was like we'll just put like a little shower tray and if it leaks and it wouldn't be leaking water it would be leaking sewage poop poop all over the secretary I woke up yesterday and my toilet was I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water,

I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking at the water, I was looking, yeah, in a few hours the downstairs neighbors are gonna get wet and they had to come to my office or my apartment And they were like we got a shut off the building. They shot the entire building's water to fix my problem Wow, so that happened to me, but I was the downstairs neighbor and they didn't call in. Oh you serious? So I literally had brown Just drain through I even went into my a breaker box and it was like leaking and I was like that can't be good They cleaned it, but I'm probably have cancer now, so Yeah, it sucked. Yeah, we discovered that leaking air conditioner unit downtown

the same time to remember the story about the lady who broke into One of the offices downtown and then it got stuck in the vent Yeah, and Ducks disappeared for a few days and don't know where you get like that story stuck with me And like I would see like the brown stuff coming through the thing like well, that's a that's a person That's someone trying to break into office who died a month ago and that's their best pieces of them how do they know bad work is you know in the movies and works out in the movies you just go through the events all the time yeah it's just like no problem it's no big

deal uh how did they end up finding like was it smell how did they find her I I think it was that's always how it starts right odd smell Patrick, I sent a picture of the vent. You get it. This can get kind of morbid, but I used to, there it is. It's like a giant alien weiner. Oh, I just, it is not in the video game, unfortunately. I used to live in co-ops. I don't know if you guys know what those are.

It's like little greenery's, yeah. Sure. College UT. Anyways, always fun stories that come out of co-ops. Great stories, like this one So we used to do hustling over summer because a lot of the rooms would be empty So yeah, so we let people come in for like a really cheap price and they can say Like it's in the title of what you're doing

Hostel okay, well anyway, so we would typically do background checks But we would do you know We would like friends laughing how do you that's from achievement honor?, you know, what do I do? Why do I do that? What are you laughing at? How do you get from achieving honor? Are they on right now? I guess. But we would let friends come in and we would just kind of take that money and put it into

slush, who wouldn't like go through our official means. So anyway, apparently these people let these crazy people in to hostel, just three of them, and they just kind of disappeared, and the door was locked to that room, and nobody really checked on it because it wasn't being like you know checked on and then eventually they started smelling something a couple weeks later. They'd all died. They'd OD'd in the car. Yeah.

This is why you can write a script about co-ops and hostels and everything's movable. Anything can happen. Cause you're nasty and nasty places. Well Blaine's co-op had a party like Andy, they and this was while Blaine was an intern he invited Chris and I And we went and it was like the lamest party I'd have her been to and the crystal I was like we should stay for at least like 30 minutes and then we'll find a reason to leave We felt so bad because we didn't want to say anything But it was just like horribly boring and I was was like, this is West Campus. I don't

understand how you make a party. I had like the the nice co-op. It was like the brand new one. So it wasn't really like there was that amazing, amazing party that like Josh's roommate through Josh's girlfriend. Yeah. Just go for that. That party was unbelievable. Yeah. Yeah. This is Halloween night. Yeah was a part of things happen. Yeah, things happen for Adam. No, no. And for Daniel. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no me so anytime anyone addresses me about my story I'm just gonna just Daniel we text we text Daniel make sure he's all right with that right yeah he's not let's go tell anyone you're kidding right if he's cool he's cool he's right there you said the cock black black black

whoa what happened that night there was a a very fun party. Yeah, and at this party, we're all having a good time. There's like an upstairs patio with a spiral table that goes up, or a spiral staircase with upstairs to about getting it over with the skyline. And downstairs is a beer pong table. And I don't know who was playing who. But Daniel comes over and is very attractive girl. It was me and Chris Martin versus me.

And then somehow they're teammates. And I'm like, wow, good for Daniel. He's talking to a very attractive girl. It was me and Chris Martin versus me. And then somehow their teammates. And I'm like, wow, good for Daniel. He's talking to a really hot girl. And then after the beer pong ends, I see Daniel come downstairs and he's like, mother fucker. I was like, what happened? He's like, he fucking cock blocked me.

And I don't know if I'm supposed to say he was, I probably won't. Was he sober? Was he like, you know, based on what said initially that's you probably rather have that happen I'm just saying probably And less and less that's what you're into you know, I guess who might he just you know, I'm just saying stop talking From that point forward Daniel's like I'm gonna get fucking drunk and I look over at the person who had cock block Daniel And I don't know if it was kind of cock blocking

No, not from what I understand that was not cock blocking explain it was competing Cox. Yeah, not cock blocking if you Is this a guy or girl because I think it's the Sound if it's if there's another person that's completing my the same person's affection that's not common my whole life any time I've ever come into a scenario that I can perceive that in any way whatsoever I think if it's one of my buddies and there's up anything I will always just be like back to have it yeah I'll just be like backing off yeah right but I don't really know what the rules are so just like oh I'm just second like backing off, right? But I don't really know what the rules are. So it's just like, oh, I'm just starting to,

I don't know what the rules are. It might be something here, back in a way. Back in a way, so the way. Every time. But the thing is, is it, like, I mean, does the girl have any say? Obviously she does. Yes, obviously.

I think that was the thing is, I mean, she was responding to Chris's affection. Daniel's like, well, I don't, I don't, I don't, we know. I mean, I don't know christ's affection and daniel's like well i don't know how do we know we know it would be i mean i don't know how to express the christian dynamic so christmau christian it's yet some game not christ so christ is talking to her and you know things are going well but daniel was progressively more and more drunk and i actually talked to daniel about this next day and he was like i have no recollection of that so there were

yet a different than was pissed the whole night at the one point we do kickstand let me forget about all those problems I forgot about that kickstand until you just mentioned it like a half hour ago but yeah so by the end of the night I'm getting a cab back with Chris we live near each other apartments and I'm walking out to meet up with Chris and he's on his cell phone waiting for the cabbie and Daniel'sing on the ground It's like blade Why are you going home with a cock block? Just screaming at the top this looks from the front lawn

It's just I mean it does it's so pointed like the onus comes on I mean the person who I I mean I never wanted you don't want to be that guy What guy what are you saying? I'm gonna be a guy involved in any of this. Oh is there any girls here at all very else there was not one Is there I can't see like if you would have locked Daniel out Of the house when he was like trying to like talk to a girl that that'd be like an extreme form of cock blocking But if you were both going out the same girl totally different who's there? Is there a girl there? Who would be the nice thing to do? Who? Merrial. Merrial.

Merrial. All right now they say they say typically for a guy they say a guy knows Whether he likes a girl or not within the first five seconds of whether he likes a girl or not within the first five seconds of meeting her. Maybe not right. I thought they said girls. But that's just, that's it. Now for a girl, it's different, right? Are you with somebody? Am I allowed to ask that? You have been, like you've been in a relationship with somebody at some point. At some point in your life, you were with someone who you loved, right? How long did it take for you as a girl to come to the conclusion that you love this person? She says months.

She says months. How long did it take for you to know that you liked them? Ten minutes. Ten minutes? You get out of some conversation. Why is it so crazy? Ten minutes, really? I thought it would be longer than that. Yeah

10 minutes. It's all it's all first impressions Five. Oh, God. That's a true. It's a typical. Huh? Girls watching this It seems like a first impression. We did art. I used to press and thing. Yeah. That, right? Well, I don't know, regardless, it was a funny night. It was a funny night. And yeah, I remember I got home and you ended up calling me and I'm not the only one that experiences, but apparently, Ellis was so drunk.

You kept on speaking in group X. I don't get drunk a lot. Okay, you know what, mainly because of my size, but when I do get drunk, I get locked in locked in I am I get locked into an accent and like it used to be Russian and Recently, I guess I adopted the group X accent and I could not stop talking in the group X accent I called you no I yeah, yeah, and I was like Adam. Did you make it home and you were like blind? I met for the girl You let a bunch of messages in that voice

He was just talking. I think it's funny because you don't have to live with it It was hilarious. You know I called I called Josh Flanagan. I'm like just flanagan I am lost Where am I? And He fucking got three thirty in the morning that dude got up out of bed got on Google Maps and Navigated my drunk at home. We just me telling him street signs and I found the party again I get to miss you from you all the time you called me at four in the morning. I was the same night. I was lost I mean I'm not I'm I'm gonna answer it. I mean I didn't know that

What the fuck is a jail Joe? I know it's a part of me. He serves me blind What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck his dad as we know it but Josh Josh Flanagan is a true American hero. Josh is a hero. Yeah, I mean that dude he got me home. But that's like in accent though. Like there was a certain point where like even just like in in person that's the only way you were talking. No, I know man. It's a it's a problem. That's why I don't drink. So we have a beer until you do it again. We have a Twitter user who likes beavers. Keve Rob Daniel. It is not cock blocking in that scenario is it is a cock petition. Oh You know I mean Oh No, I don't know how to call in Chris Martin. I don't know who's true or not, but apparently women have told me it doesn't matter how you look

It's just if we like your personality within the first 10 minutes and confidence. I could be paraphrasing some some girls Chris and I both came to the same realization It's like at some point and it was I think college for both of us you realize it just yeah, the christomers if you just have confidence It makes like a complete difference and you can just fake you fake confidence long enough It'll work I agree yeah if you're a guy and you can and you can do the confidence thing. Yeah long enough and strong enough It will work. Yeah, and if they're a girl It's a different metric. Like confidence is less,

because this is the way that it would be. It's just different. There, I swear to God, there's a game in the game. Have you heard of the ladder theory? What's a ladder theory? The ladder theory is. The top theory is. There's ladders when it comes to a relationship

between a girl and a guy. There are shoots. There's a fur. With a girl. With a girl. With a girl between a girl and a guy. There's shoots. There's a fur. With a real girl. First girl, there are two ladders. There's the friendship ladder and then there's the guy. I know.

I'm always trying to hear about this because once you know about it, then you know about it. Okay, so there's one ladder. There's just one ladder. There's just one ladder for the guy and it's like the more you hang out with a girl, even if you're like friends, but if you really do hang out with the might you you like her right there's one ladder that's the only metric you use for a girl there's the friendship ladder and then the boy boy I like ladder and the higher you get on the friendship ladder the harder

it is to leap onto the other ladder the guy I want to day ladder and if you don't make it you will fall and you will fall drastically. I think there's some logic to that. Yeah. I mean, that's what if you're like become the best friend and you're like, no, I like you. And just like, you're just friend. And then you have to talk in that voice.

Yeah. How are you? How good. Thanks, ladder. Cool. That will never work. That was, um, it makes sense. It does me. I think there's some logic to that now

You know what I'm getting tired of is running into you guys at the fucking HB. Oh like every single fucking time Every time I go to lunch I went I was it was like six o'clock at night and I went to HB to go buy some beer And I'm walking back there and I go oh there's there's JJ and he hasn't seen me yet. So I'm gonna play a funny little joke where he's like sort of his head's like halfway into the the counter or the slam. So what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna walk up directly behind him and I'm gonna put my head and inch away from his head and then when turns around, I'll just be right there in his face, so it would really be funny.

So I walked up to him and I put my head just like right directly behind his head, just stood there for a minute, and he really did kind of take a long time in there. And I was like, no, I'm standing there, like I'm committed to this, and like people are watching me now.

And then all of a sudden it occurred to me, what if this isn't jailed? people are watching me now. And then, all of a sudden, it occurred to me, what if this isn't J.L.A.D.? And then I was like, wasn't sure. I was like, this may not be J.J. And it's like, well, I just, I just got to reject. I just gave you out of here. So I was like, I immediately just rejected

and just pulled away. Did you find the last J.J.? I'm no idea. Oh my God. I'm no idea what it was. But all the people were just like sitting watching me walk up see a guy the refrigerator walk up directly behind him Put my head directly behind his head Did he have green head just like I might be able to tell you to use JJ when was this? Oh

Well, I like it. Okay. I've been holding this story for like a moment Okay, I'm living with this guilt for like a mom. He does shop at that at that HB So you should have gone a you should have gone through the back, you know, because they have that, you know, like, the work is... When you say by the back, what do you say? When you say no. I was only willing to commit to the joke so far, Brandon. Go to like, you know, the back of the back of outside H.E.B.

and then go up to where like the fridge that he was in and then just put your head behind the milk carton that he's grabbing. And he like grabs it. It's just your face staring at him. Like, hello. Well, I wasn't, I didn't, I wasn't that comment. That ain't way cold. There's like that thing at the grocery store

when your friend sees you. And I, it always fucking happens where like the person's like, I'm gonna ram you with my cart every fucking time. I'm gonna watch you have a blame. Hey, that's, yeah, that, that, that, that, does it? Like, Adlincey did it? You get a cart?

Yeah. Fucking cart. I got a bunch shit Who fucking gets a car? I am in and fucking out. I'm like a man That's the thing like I normally don't have time for jokes at the grocery store Like if it's like if somebody kind of sees me and like that's what I'm saying I don't want to see you guys at the grocery store like I go to lunch everybody this fucking company is that that grocery store I don't want to see you the grocery store because then you get that weird thing where it's like oh he sees me I see him do talk I can't talk damn I got my basket. I'm on a mission in out. Yeah I'm a basket guy too, but it was one time I was like I'll fuck I don't need a basket and then I was walking around

I was like shit. I need this I need this and I need this so eventually like I'm walking through the store Yeah, like way too much shit and I'm too proud to go get a basket And then I'm walking and I'm like clapping stuff and I have to do that awkward thing where I'm holding stuff and I'm kneeling down and someone's like Oh, can I help you look no and then you go to check out and then They go oh you need to buy a bag Yeah, which is like that's a new thing fucking constant man. Yeah the bag man. I never bring my bags. I buy them every time I bring mine And they're sending my car it's like 25 cents of things that don't need to do. Joel, next time I see you at the Gurgestore,

I'm the longest conversation with you. I just see me going away. I can't do a red ad. Let me read the chat about. What's it about? I'll tell you. Cooking and eating should be enjoyable, Joel. But if you're busy or health conscious or just don't know your way around a kitchen, it can be pretty stressful. Ordering out is expensive and gets unhealthy fast. Cooking to pain too. Finding, coming up with recipes, shopping for ingredients, dealing with leftover produce that goes to waste, forget it.

You need blue apron and take the stress out of cooking. Here's how it works. For 999 per meal, they'll send the right ingredients and the exact right proportions with simple recipe instructions right to your door. Meals are 500 to 700 calories per serving, way too low for how delicious they are. Blue apron includes a step-by-step instructions with pictures, it's idiot proof. They work around your schedule and your dietary preferences. Cooking takes about half an hour and shipping is always free. You'll make meals like turkey meatballs with fresh tomato sauce and Parmesan crusted chicken with kale Caesar salad and more delicious meals

You'll cook incredible meals and be blown away by the quality and freshness blue apron fast fresh and affordable And the stress of cooking right now go to blue apron dot com slash research and get your first two meals free That's right two free meals just by going to blue apron dot com slash research teeth. That's a cool voice You do that. I feel like I got to do the readjust this I Like it I thought it was I love it. I love it. It was a stony an accent Apron wait, what was that? No, no, that was close. Okay. I thought that was I don't I don't know He's a no the thick stress out of cooking you know

He's a no or anything. Geography is black. At least you I love services like this because it keeps eliminating times Or I have to go out to places interact with people like Emily who hands are so perfectly was saying Oh, if you got out to stores now, there's Christmas stuff everywhere and I was like shit I haven't been in a store in like six months. And you're like, it's like, fuck Christmas. Yeah, fuck Christmas. Between like Amazon and like services like this, it's like, I never go out anywhere and like interact with people in retail.

And it's tremendous. But is there something wrong? Is there something wrong with that? Like, is it? No, I'm with you. I mean, I know that I don't like interacting with personalities, but it's like interactive personalities. Before I was like, I'm scared you. I mean, I know that I don't like interacting with personalities, because I've interacted with personalities.

Mm-hmm. Before I was like, I don't, I'm scared to death. I'm going to run into people I know. Mm-hmm. People who are with us all of this. They're cursing, they're like, you're like, awkward. Well, Apple has this great thing where you can go to the store and you have your phone and you just scan a barcode on an item and you pay for it and leave. You don't have to interact with anyone I was doing that one day and then like I mean person came up to me like you know who works there was like sir Can I help you miss if they think you're ruining this you're ruining this for me. Go away. Thank you very much. I appreciate it, but

That's wow. That's really crazy. Yeah, how does you just walk out? How does like I'm gonna just take a picture of like Do you see on a MacBook and just I paid for it leave No, it's like my headphones and stuff Okay, it's like Where's the Walked out what's up to your counters how does it work? Yeah, yeah, if you have an Apple ID account I'll charge it to your credit card, but it's it's tremendous like I can't wait to You really dive into that stuff, and don't I like I always wait like anytime

a lot of times anytime anything sort of comes out I'm like well I'm gonna wait till the first patch you know I'm dating immediately I can't wait I'm to get that first eye watch when it comes out are you oh yeah what are you gonna do with it why are you gonna get an eye watch well I like those things like I had the Fitbit Force. Force? Yeah, before it tried to kill me. Uh, and... Uh, it was great because it like actually made me active.

I was like, crap, I've hit 5,000 steps like for the last four days. I'm gonna hit it again today. And it worked, but then there was some chemical reaction that it had with my skin. And it eventually gave me this like horrible chemical burn. It was like yellow and pussy and it was like you should get that checked and I was like really? And then it turned out it was it wasn't just me they recalled the product. What in the fuck? What material are they using?

I don't know. Using rare earth materials on the outside of like is it uranium 238? I mean what's the official word from them was that some people have a reaction to some nickel people like they have bad reactions to nickel So I don't know how big that group was but they did issue a recall so since then That's really strange and now we know if we want to play jokes on you. We know exactly Exactly what to do that. I've never heard of that. Yeah, it was bad. I was like, this is like an STD on my arm. What's going on?

Risk on area. No. Risk on area. Um, Jack, I got a weird thing. We went tubing. What happened? I can't even know like a leg infection. It was just, I don't know exactly what it was,

but he had this thing where he could like push down his leg and left his state. It was the most disgusting thing ever. I never want to go tubing because of it. I where he could like push down his leg. Oh yeah, it's an interesting. It was the most disgusting thing ever. I never want to go to him because of it. I've never been. He had a big, swollen leg.

Like a gross, post leg. Like it would stay. Like if you went, it would stay. So it was like Play-Doh. Yeah, I was like Play-Doh, which is like, that was like a stretch arm strung. It just swelled up and... Yeah, I mean, either he got something that wasn't good or he was turning to some weird superhero. No, his body is super sensitive.

Do you remember when we shot the first immersion? I love that you knew that. No, we shot the first immersion like for you. How is he emotionally? I don't, just across the street. We were all outside and he put any sunscreen on and I think like you know a few of us were kind of burnt. He looked like a lobster.

I felt so bad for it. That was, that was, God, he had, that's what you got robbed and all that stuff that's a different shoot yeah and he got rock he got robbed while we were on it was at the first time you got robbed of the second he got robbed twice as terrible is pretty bad it's terrible but I don't know how much of the story I don't know if we can talk about it it's not the cult the guy or a family he's allergic to nickel so I so that worked out good it was saying like I love the transaction stuff and before you talk about it. It's not. They call it the guy. All right. Apparently he's allergic to nickel. So that worked out good.

It goes to you, Mike. I love the transaction stuff and digital stuff, but I think sometimes it goes too far. Apparently Snapchat is now going to allow you to send cash transfers through their service by using like square, which is a very popular retail. So if you're on Snapchat, you can be like, oh, I'm going to send I'm the Zettish ton of like, he bucks and it's like, and just be clear. Snapchat is a very popular retail. So if you're on Snapchat, you can be like, oh, I'm going to send I'm the Zett is trying to like the bucks and it's like and just be clear Snapchat is a program basically where it's a temporary

Messaging yeah, right wherever you need you for white. No, you're gonna be paying for that. Not officially But that's not safe, but like you could take a picture like so Come on And then I could send that to Blaine and Blaine could look at it for five seconds and then the picture disappears. Right. Which makes a lot of sense to me actually. Yeah.

I think it's actually really. It's a genius thing. And I think it solves a lot of people's problems. But now you can have money. Facilitate. Well, this also makes sense to me if you think about it, right? Because there's like a whole secondary business that from what I'm told of naked women dancing around on the internet what apparently there are naked women dancing around on the internet

and people pay to see this if that's true then why is anybody watching these are like basically I don't know why you will be watching this We are naked lady coming late, but it's like it makes sense right now You can have like a minute you have a whole and a whole business model Rapt up in a snapchat where you can just you can dance around naked on your phone Yeah, no, it's gonna get wiped and charge people No one ever has to work They have to have in the boardroom the snapchat boardroom

They have to have an explicit conversation about this right like some guys like why are we gonna do this? It's gonna cost money to set it up another guy's like well people will pay other people to see naked picture No, like sex about right sex and porn has been at the forefront of Technology for yeah, that's true. I mean, it's like and it's just I'm sure it's like a stop now The number one reason you wanted faster internet was because it took 20 minutes to load like, you know, one image back in like 1995, born. You're like, I need porn faster. Right.

And it all makes a little sense. Yeah, so, but it's still though, I'm still wary of a lot of that stuff. Like, I don't know if I would use it in any other way. It seems sketchy, right? But I guess that's the whole thing. Yeah. I mean mean they had a Snapchat didn't have a leak But there was a service that people were using that basically Took pictures that you you used in Snapchat and stored it on your phone that service was hacked

And so a lot of people got those pictures and spread them out everywhere So it's not it wasn't an issue of somebody I don't know to say like all the people But if you were sending it to an asshole, there's a, by the way, there's an artist who did something incredibly genius. They took all those naked pictures that were leaked and took all the naked pictures and then painted clothes over the actresses who really posted the pictures. I was like, well, that guy's a fucking genius. Like, that's, yeah, that's right. And actually, I never actually, I'm the one guy in America. I actually have not seen any naked pictures of any of those people.

I only saw the ones with like, painted clothing on them. Which is like, pretty awesome. Well, did you see what Chelsea Handler did? No, what did you do? Yeah, weird. The horse. What? The horse thing?

What we think about, oh, we think about Chelsea lately. I don't know what the last name is. The girl. Chelsea lately or hand lately. It's not probably.. It's easy. Lately a horse, huh? Lately is the show hand-led Thing. She got the horse naked Okay, got into a horse naked Kim correct Kim. I get eaten by the snake Kim Kardashian released these absolutely ridiculous photos of her Showing off her butt like they were just oh this is a break the internet thing? Yeah, break the internet. And so Chelsea responded an Instagram photo

of just her butt and it was just like, just it like tan lines and no sauciness, no photoshopping. And it was really funny. It was like a really fun and clever critique. And she was like, I don't give a shit. That's how she's doing that. I think she posted the topless photo of her on a horse because Putin was riding a horse topless

and she was spoofing that. Oh, is that one? Yeah, yeah, it's really weird. I generally think she's funny, although I don't really watch TV. She's really clever and really takes a lot of guts. Just like fuck it, I don't care. Should we do that as everything?

Yeah, I can post a series. I guess somebody took a close-up picture of like their scrotum Well, I just put that on there like that's balsy Way to go but I made it oh Jesus So like a guy part in the bottom. What's that? Let's go to them. It's a part in the bottom. What is that just like a balls? It's wait wait wait wait wait wait not knowing wait me of a man. Just time out. What's that? Let's go to them to the part in the bottom or is that just like a balls? It's wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait I'm even man. Just time out. What do you think it's gonna be? Well, let's either like the junk or the thing in between the bottom with the seam. Oh

So should we tell them or should we just like not tell them? Oh My god What's the difference? Let's move on! Not now! The education system has failed. Pointed it out. You know what's fun?

I know what a scrotum is. But I'm not judging anyone. I mean, we all know what a scrotum is most of us three out of four 70s, 70s, 70s, 80s, 80s, 80s. But apparently the still the stuff I'm at a well just there's some stuff I'm at a girl who at a goddamn I cannot remember the name of this either. Oh, I got a Google it Where is the one girl still here? Google scrotums. I knew a girl who was like naming off parts I knew a girl who was like naming off parts That were even more you know that thing. All right. I don't even know if I want to go either there's like there's like a thing

I don't know how to talk about this All right, there's a for okay, so use your words women have vaginas All right men Don't have a giant. Yeah, that's what I said. All right, it's like no no no no no no no no don't don't have a giant. Yeah, that's what I said. The stratum. No, no, don't derail me. Alright, so, we all know what a scrotum is.

But there's a thing on a guy, like underneath, like if you had a vagina, that's where it would be, but there's like a line. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. That was the other thing, the scene. That's, you know, there's like a line. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. That was the other thing, the seam. That's, you know, there's like a, there's like a, there's like a, there's like a, there's like a thing there, right? Yeah. There's a name for that.

And I don't remember the fucking name for that thing, but God, it's not screw, it's not screw, that's not the screw. Tains like that. No, that's the gooch. It's the, yeah. Like that's the area, the, the, the chain is like the area between the balls and the ball.

It was like, you know, that body part. It was like a sw is like the area between the balls and It was like a You know that body part It was like a falloffal RC pod can I think it's a falloffal I think I know what you're saying I think it was a falloffal The falloffal is the line That little lion hangs down

There's like a name for the hangy part And it's the thing I'm not hungry Do you like hang out? Right, I haven't figured out what a scrotum is yet Yeah, I was right It was just a stuff What's stuff?

What? You know, it's what, should I tell him? I don't know how to tell. I mean, I don't know how to have this. So you know when you like have like like laundry and you know, like all the laundry and then you put into a bag, think of the scrotum as like the bags. Wow, you will make a great dad. Son, let me tell you about the screw

on him. But no, this is the main reason why I don't want to have kids just so I don't have to have this conversation. I have to sit there right now. But Braden's like four years older than me. No, so, you know, I didn't know the name of the falafel. And so the girl was like that's a falafel. And I thought it was so funny about the falafel that every single time I saw that girl at a party I'm like ah floppel And like after wall she was like starting avoiding Stop talking to her like every time that guy runs into me. He's just like ah Someone know the piece what it's called

Perineum perineum perineum, but like a cute name. That's not true right like a pussy name So there's a will be not a pair of floppel that every time you see her you just start listing off like Genitalia names. I was like I was Like somebody knew something that I didn't know that I was like, ah there she is a girl I knew something I'm gonna bring it up to her. I'm so proud of her. Screw them Scrooom I think you start avoiding me. And then head to that, head to head to that, like self-conversation.

Why does he keep avoiding me every time? That's mean the shout out. I don't know what that was. I thought she was walking around. Where's the fluffle again? Why does that have a name? Do you shave your chest, Blaine? Oh, we have a chest hair I got. I did recently because after the live stream, when they waxed my chest, there's a giant

bald spot, so it just grows in the shape of a penis now, so I had to shave around it. Are you going to keep up with it? I mean, until it all grows back, I like having a hairy chest, but still the hairy penis on your chest? No, I have a hairless penis on my chest. But not right now because I shaved it. Sure, it's kind of clean, I guess. But yeah.

Speaking of Tesco's, remember when we went to Disney? And we were on Pirates of the Caribbean. We both, like, I did like, I was like, Brandon passed through the talcum powder. Contact, explain. Pass through the talcum powder because I was chafing it. Where's our girl? Talk to my balls.

Girl on Pir pyres the Caribbean Girl there we go girl sir you jump to the A4 Playing he's you did not joke out distracted Story was your balls were chafing girl and it's like a man with hair or not hair See I have a no hair or no shaving I like that she's walking away. She's like orange. We know what Meg likes like I like that I have a theory I have a theory and I'm a theory and I don't think it matters

I don't think it fucking matters. Oh, I think that they're just gonna kind of tell you What you want to hear? I think that's the kind of they do that With a lot of things. I've met some pretty like open Have you ever have you met a girl who was like Told me I just hair. Yeah, have you yes? That was the one that I mean it's good That was the one that had the the boyfriend with the penis reduction scars did she did she get a boyfriend here no no actually did she get a lot of hair it was not a fan no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, You know what's stopping you Adam is that you're just silly gonna turn into like a G

I Like if you just let it go you turn in Like a perfect circle I'm just here to go we can like hang you from a Christmas tree. I do it's bad No, you stand it out one time I just borrowed borrow someone's thinning shares Let me borrow your I went all hair No, you don't shit like no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no So it's a, women have to like shave their legs. And I guess that's like a weekly thing.

I don't know. Girl, where's girl? Girl. Girl. Maryl, don't answer. Girl. Is it a week? Is it like a week?

I would say daily, depending on the day. You don't have to answer any of these questions. Some girls girl hair faster. I want a girl. I shape my legs like... What? A pain in the ass. Right. Right, that's a lot of surface area.

Hi. He needs... Why don't you just wax it? Why don't you get laser? Laser. Laser doesn't work? It's really expensive. It takes forever and it comes back.

Yeah, even that comes back to it. It's like a couple of months though, right? Like six months or something? That's worth it. Adam. Adam, do you shave your ass? Like the cheeks Like the hairy ass. I have to really hate. I really hate to say this. Let's talk about but this is a conversation we've already had

Oh, we're not mean him, but we've had this conversation on the podcast. Oh really? We had this conversation like and it was a horrible conversation. It was like somebody on the internet this conversation like and it was a horrible conversation. It was like somebody on the internet talked about this and they're like, I'm going to have an experiment where I'm going to like shave my ass and they'll end up but all the fun whole. Yeah. And everything. And apparently the his conclusion was God put hair there for a reason because apparently like when you take all the hair out of there like the liquids like it gets liquidy and it builds up and he had this image of like talking about like the at one point having to separate it what

did you send it to you snapchat oh my god 20 about having to separate it at one point and the imagery was like talking about like an octopus or something just like trying to like Yeah, and if we just um oh You read that story and then you won't it's got to be between the two otherwise you know, but I Do I trim? Yes, right. I just man's gaping. You got it man's gaping. I'll So it's called I can't tell that story. No, yeah, you do I can't tell that story But there's gotta be I'm on my I'm on my board with

Man's gaping are you particular with the kind of razor you do like you get to the quad trailer like no fucking way Whoa, it's too many use tremors. You use tremors, right? You don't use a straight rate like a razor razor Well, I just I use a knife I just tell my man. I have like I get you like the sharpest butcher knife that I can just fine It's fire fire or knife I would cry. It's Jack speaking of hair Right on time, so we understand you're getting more hair in your family You're getting more hair delivered to your family. You're getting a cat, dude.

Maybe. You're getting a more hair. You have the most hair-filled household of anyone. You got you and two cats and another cat and a dog. Perhaps. You can all just collecting all the different hair families. Yeah, we're working on it now because Adam stole my cat So I had to get another oh

I was talking about it because I defended you relentlessly Did he from Adam? I was like you're a good guy Jack. I know being Adam trying to steal Jack's cat What an asshole. I was gonna play a joke on you guys I've been talking this whole like we talked about it for a half hour I was gonna get like I was gonna get like two rump roasts and a bunch of like fur and a bunch of fake blood and just load them into a box. I take one. It's a nice watch right there. Should I take it?

Are you plugging watches? Yeah. It's not that time yet. Oh, sorry. Are we plugging watches officially? No, I'm sure the us is the sponsor. Let's talk about hairy assholes and now to the sponsor. So Jack, we were supposed to have another round of

Smite Termins today and you see not an email last night and I was like okay well my team needs to practice so I came here last night at 11 and I played until what time we played until 1.30. I was playing with Brandon so yeah like 1.32 I slept here overnight so that I could wake up at like six or seven a.m. And then you cancel it this morning. So I slept up. You didn't really sleep here overnight. I slept here overnight. No way. There's no way you slept here overnight for a slight tournament. Yeah, I did.

Josh was sleeping here a lot. I don't know what it is. I know the bonks are the big bean bag. Are you sleeping in the oh Jesus Christ. Who's bunked you sleeping? I sleep in the middle one because it's between the two desks that are in you. What the fuck you think I've been doing? I'm'm funding my shirt. I don't like you that much There you are. I like I like when we break the plan. It is a good time. It is good

We broke it already on breaking friction life But we we use the hell out of it for actual life. You did use the fucking off wrap out of it I use the hell out of the graphics All right Three this read it and it will all be around the people. Alright, let me uh... Let me uh... Read it. You have to do it in an instant. You have to do it in Eastern Ukrainian accent.

I'm gonna help you read it. I just want to remind everyone that this episode of Roots Your Teeth Podcast is brought to you by Finders Keepers Creations. Finders Keepers Creations makes custom, paracord, bracelets, keychains, watches, and more. I can do it. Everything is custom made to your colors, charms, sizes and styles. These are perfect to express yourself in a unique way and they make great gifts. With literally tens of thousands of combinations you can make a bracelet that is really special for yourself or a loved one. Flat rate shipping throughout the US is only $3 and they do ship

internationally. Like them on Facebook for exclusive giveaway sales or and new products. Support this podcast and get 10% off your first order. Go to finderskeeperscreations.com and use the code podcast2atcheckout. If you're shopping for the holidays, order sooner rather than later because everything is custom, made to order. So the thing that I love particularly about those is they have a US or some of them have a USB built into it and I've always wanted to build have a USB built into it and I've always wanted to build like a USB connection into my body. Like I would absolutely if I can go to a doctor and they implant that inside me.

What if you could take off a pinky and just like, there's a guy who got a finger and knuckle amputated or I mean I think it was an accident and he got a fake tip and put a USB port on the Internet. Oh yeah, because how often? Oh, I'm just like what if they change so it's like USB it jumps to you. I'm sure you can pull it out. I put a new one in I mean can we get a close-up of these guys? Joe was reading a Craigslist ad. Joe.

Because it's like how many times you've been like, ah I need a transfer this thing and I can someone has my god damn. It's good close-up. USB stick. What was that? What happened to you? Oh God it happens all the time. Oh, I So you want a USB stick you should have multiple you I have them, but they disappear People are in our office are just like evil bastards. Yeah, they're evil bastards I just take shit and they'll put about somebody so you send me My favorite out of the bunch. What if what if you needed to like upgrade the space and it's like on my arm

Yeah, it's like I only have 32 and you get to 64. Oh, I'm sure 32 gigabytes is always gonna be enough clearly You never can in need more okay, Bill Gates or the Steve Jobs said that did he say that? Yeah, he said something like who would need more than 16 megs of data or something like that right back like floppy This is yeah, yeah, I mean every every iteration of data It's like you'll never need more than 40 something like that. Right, back in like a floppy distance. Yeah, yeah, back in a, every, every iteration of data, it's like, you'll never need more than 40 gigs like that. I just have to have an every, every time like, now we have a six-terabyte hard drive, you'll never need more than six.

It's gonna keep happening. Well, you slept here overnight. Yeah. Why would you sleep here overnight? Because I thought the smudge room was this morning already. You probably have a very comfortable couch or something at home to sleep on, right? Yeah, I got like an $1,100 apartment a month that I don't use. Cool, you should use it.

Yeah, I know that's like a super apartment if you don should use it. Yeah, I know that's super apartment. If you don't use it. Yeah, Britain is like a nomad. Do like sleep. Adam was in the Gale. Sleep, yeah. You can share an apartment with Adam. He has a shitty apartment.

No, it's a nice apartment. It's gonna be perfect for a cat. No, it's a shitty apartment. It's gonna be a great father. It's gonna be miserable in it. But that would be good. I like how Jack is all rich. You know, the nice beautiful housing.

It likes the calm rich. No, I'm not rich. What are you doing Joel? I hope to do you have a nice house. Don't judge each one casual and casual. All right. So you're gonna be my article Yeah, that's right. You did remember in the you were awesome. I owe you I owe you a favor I'm no you're already apparently already repay the favor with the smite tournament brackets Oh, yeah, that's right. He paid me to do that. Did you tell you that? Yeah? I did not who one is it over? No, it's not we filmed one today that we won't we don't say who put well about obviously me and I win play

We had a team Dark Souls play today versus cranberries and so that was a fun match to watch and we've got two more left We're actually three more left because we'll do a third place match and then you guys rainbow tiger versus Leftovers and then whoever wins that will go into win whoever won this morning and then and then we'll have the yeah that will have the final and then we have a third place match and it's gonna be a lot of fun. What a surprise. So Joel was looking at porn. He knows reading the butthole story. What a butthole story. What did I walk in on? I love to see Joel him in search history.

I can't read this whole thing because it's just too long I didn't read any of it and brutal this is fascinating podcast morning. Don't shave that hair I recently made the mistake of my life Oh, I've heard and I offer my story to you that you learn from my error. It's totally fake, but it's funny. Is it fake? Absolutely, I don't know it sounds there's no way that's real. Unfortunately, it did dry. Wait, they're going. Unfortunately again, this exertion caused me to sweat. And when I finally reach my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other,

like a pair of horny cane toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and it's just to dry my ass off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart And horrific stench burst free and filled the room Every dog within a four block radius started to how My god, this is horrible you have to I can't I can't we've this My god, this is horrible you have to I can't I can't tweet this Yeah, of course you can't wait so you have to do some of the mind and now talk about this and god what did he use use the

Pulling apart like a starfish So what else have you guys been talking about for the past hour? I can't believe I was working about I was working to come in and say hi and the thing that hangs down Between your asshole and your scrotum. Oh the Gucci as I was going to come in and say hi and the thing that hangs down Between your asshole and your scrotum. Oh the Gucci as I was or the grondole The grondole. Yeah, there's a couple different terms for it. That's what it fucking was or dink fucking grondole There's a couple different terms for it. I fucking screamed. Hey, it's the grondole at that girl for like weeks It's the grondole. It's the grondole. I don't know why she didn't like that. You were calling some girl a grundle Well, she told me about the name of it and so it's like every time I equated the name of that with her

Why would you so closely because I was proud of her because she told me something that I didn't know what was this? Where was this do do you do you have windows pending do animals have grundles? I don't know I'm really cat professional who knows that cats can enjoy Like four grundles in your don't know, I'm a yearly cat professional who knows that the cats can enjoy a cat far away. You're gonna have four grundles in your household. Jack, why? You are getting cat! Now I am. You're trying to make me post-pone my cat.

I think we should get your cats together and make them fight. They're gonna be their almost brother and sister. They're their sisters. Yeah, I think they share a father. Wasn't they talk to somebody lost a bet to somebody else earlier before the podcast did somebody lose a bet to somebody else Yeah, we're eating some of football is that that was the thing right what yeah, I don't know I thought you said the jack lost a bet to you or something. I don't think so. I mean that's I mean that's just every day Hey Jeremy was it town a town in England?

Who's a town, a town in England? Second way. Yeah, all right. Great job, boy. Tell us, Brandon, how about the town in England? Who's this kid that walked in on a public bathroom and found a guy in a tigger costume having sex with some woman? Well, at this point, if you say public restroom and man and woman, you're ahead of the game.

Because normally, if you say public restroom, it's gonna be different. A couple of people. The kid freaked out and like the people freaked out and they like you know through the door clothes, smashed the kids hand. And he feels so bad for this kid but like have the and how they're gonna be scarred for the rest of the life. Did you have a moment like that when you were? Wait, wait, how do I say?

Um, it doesn't say. I'm sure. Did you have a moment like that when you were a kid? That doesn't saymmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Fuck me up for life, but it's like walking on somebody having sex or something like that or something just like scar Did you know I think I think you did because he's Printed I think everyone's had this one. I don't know what ever I don't know what was the moment. Oh no, I'm not gonna. It's in my it's I can't even remember it's all the way back That's like it's so horrible and it gets blocked and you don't remember it, right? Yeah, I don't know you suppress it right. I guess,, right? I guess, but it's like, it's like,

it's like, I mean, have you ever tried to like, you know, oh my God, am I, do I suppressing something for my childhood? It's blah, blah, blah. I don't know. I can't, that's the thing, I can't picture it. I forgot, not necessarily to suppress, but it's like, I would go somewhere and be like,

oh shit, I remember this place. Like, remember when we were in San Francisco, we were at one time. Oh, yeah, that's right. And like, we went to go, we were going to the 2K, on 2K Marin, on like were in San Francisco. We were that one. Oh, yeah It's right Yeah, like we went to go we were going to the 2k on 2k Marin on like north of San Francisco Yeah, or drive these dislocation all of a sudden jolt like I've been here Yeah, it's like I had this feeling where it's like I've been here before I've been there before and I had been there before My house was when I grew up I was like yeah five or six, five or six of me, I was like, that's my house, five or six. We drove to Joel's house.

Yeah, and it's like, when you're five or six, you're entire, you equate the entire world to like, because you're close to the ground, like puddles and like, things like to the ground and like, you vision your house being so big and you're like, your house is like, everything's smaller. This is really weird. This is so weird.

Stuff like that's happened before, like, like, members were a little triggered that I haven't thought about in like decades. But as far as repressing stuff, I don't think so. I constantly get that with dreams. I don't remember things that I have repressed. Shh. Okay, you ever?

I know a lot of people are repressing this podcast. That's true. Was there a podcast? I remember that. Blaine, did you ever have like a scarring moment when you were going up? What's the most emotionally scarring things ever happened? Emotionally scarring things.

I don't know. I don't know. You had to come back to that. Bling, talk to the council. Tell us your dark time. Who laid down the couch. No, I don't know. Was it the hair thing? Is it the hair thing?

You were so excited to eat your chest wax. Where did that come from? We mean. We've already talked to the council. We've already talked to the council. We've already figured it out. You were up for it, man. They came out of nowhere. You had a bad experience't know what my chest is do that experience with a girl

And so evil world told him that they didn't like just here Oh, he looks for any excuse and I'm sure you'd agree with this to take a shirt off He's got like four buttons on one. I can't look at that. He's looking because the shirt's fucking tight Kkibir muscles inside of it. All right, and every string you take off your shirt at least three or four times. YouTube already thinks I'm a douchebag. You're just helping their case. No, clear away. No, you're not.

You're a good dude. I like your way. It's a good, we did the stupid honed house thing. And Blaine kicked a lot of ass. That was not an easy shoot. Did you punch a ghost? No, I just helped out. We just did stuff. I think you literally kicked the ghost ass. blank kicked a lot of ass that was that was not a good the punch a ghost not self-doubt of the case that's a little early kick goes that uh... the most i don't know

traumatizing thing i was at night with the hundred house now i went to a party uninvited and that is just like scarred me like ever since i've never been able to party like unless i have like two invites because like it was right marina back up it was fucking awkward was like eyes wide shut was like people like banging with mask on or something,

and you stumbled into something you weren't supposed to do. No, it was just weird. It was just like it was a popular chick and we had been friends in during grade school and then she ended up having a party in like middle school. We were on the wrong ladder. By then that's when all the,

that's like when all the, you know, sectioning happens and all the clicks and stuff. And I ended up going because a lot of my friends were going and Man, I got called out for my shit and it was just awkward So do you do you in if the losers why do I want to be like we're not picking a blame are we? If you know that like I'm really good like I'm really good friends with jack We go that far theoretically, okay, and so the Jack advice me to a party and I know it's cool

If I bring another friend like Joel you say they weren't friends and actual Joel you want to come to jack's party with that be your huge one of the party didn't invite you to write me out but have to have the host by me that's how I feel this motherfucker invited me to a party a couple weeks ago is like it's totally cool it's not cool no it's not no it is totally cool what party talking about uh the Halloween party the first first Halloween party. It's, it's, it's cool.

Like I mean, it's cool. I mean, if we know somebody that wins a party, I mean, it's, I don't get, I don't get structured, I don't get structured parties. Like that doesn't make sense to me. I mean, it's like a wedding thing or whatever. It's so fun. It's so fun. It doubles advocate like they bought a specific amount of food in beverages for the

amount of people that they invited. Who buys food for parties and expects, like, okay, this person, everyone's gonna eat X amount. Now, let's just like a dinner party. I'm just saying, like, if everybody brings an extra somebody that wasn't invited, I mean, let's face it. I mean, all the people I know, and all the parties I've gone through the years, I mean, every single one of them, like, hey, we're gonna have a party. We'd like you a lot. We'd love you bring her on beer

You know, it's like okay, I'm which it was totally fine with but if it's like a bring your own beer situation I don't know. I mean listen I don't want to like save it like I want to invite strangers or so Who's got a lot of house on that? I would say every party blains come to mind. He's always brought his own beer You always bring your own Guinness you bring Guinness because you're the only person I know who drinks Guinness and then there's Guinness in my fridge like until the next party and I'm like don't bring me see that you bring more that's a side better than that that was actually a joke at the time okay so you don't bring Guinness anymore no because she she was the Guinness chick oh she's engaged

now which is really fucking weird I think I'm scarred and that's the one who's like hair no different, different chick. Different chick. I was gonna put it all together. Look for it. You see us side that thing, man. Uh, yeah. Let's have a party.

Let's have a party. I've never actually, I mean, I should say this. I'm actually hosted a party. Maybe I'm speaking out of turn that's not shocking because I don't like people at all, but you host parties I don't know it's a lot of beer. Yeah, I mean you have a whole fridge will be here from I mean all these party I mean that's a total benefit for the husband Well, I mean if you drink a lot of beer. Yeah, I mean I've got I've got tons of liquor and beer from other party I had spent some money at your parties. Yeah, I spent $200 on fireworks. We're doing your party.

Doing bigger fireworks this year. You're gonna spend like $500 on fireworks. I thought we were going to Vegas. Yeah, we're going to Vegas. No, no, no, we're going to Vegas in like a couple of weeks. We're going to go for a ride. December 5th through 7th. Okay, I thought you were going to Vegas. Wait, your cat is coming. Yeah, the week, the one I come back.

What's hair bellow? I think they can't come back on the server the reason I'm prepping you the seventh is your biggest is a Sunday I'm asking the like watcher cat for him actually is getting another cat just to give the Adam so he has two cats great great great there's gonna right you know though because it's a bangle cat this cat really could be a big pain yes yeah and I was telling him I don't want to tell you this I was telling him he's like I want the cat. I want the cat. I'm like Adam You're gonna get that fucking cat and within a month you're gonna be like I don't want this fucking cat Contest on the podcast right now to the fan who wants Jack and Adam cat the most

And Adam's gonna pay for the shipping ship of the cats Adam, what are you gonna do if the cat hates you? Win the cat. He won't he won't you know, no I'm on a cat version Maybe he's not maybe he's not an Adam person. Apparently is pretty pretty friendly and pretty rainbunxes Yeah, yeah, I the cat the the bre carrier has sent a lot of photos and videos. He's adorable. And make sure of the grumble. That's really cool.

Man. It says, hey, it's the grumble. Nice. I want to talk about something while I'm here. Talk about something. I'll get the hell out of here. Because this feels really awkward. It's like sitting in the middle seat of a plane where I have nothing to put my arms on.

Like, I hate sitting in the middle seat. Oh, it's when you were in a like a school bus and you had a fit three to a seat. When did you do that? Our seats are tiny. You only fit two. Yeah unless you school's broke and you only have like three buses. What school did you go to? Backwater. Let's know when you want to talk about your emotional situation. We're here for you. Uh, anyway, God, these memories are just bad. Get our press school bus memories. That's a whole other thing.

I'm going to talk about Let's Play Live. That's the available. Oh, yeah. December is the summer 17th. We mentioned it on the extra life podcast or extra life stream. Excuse me. And yeah, it's coming up in just

a Jesus Christ like a month from now, literally a month from today. And it's going to be super kick ass and tickets will be going on sale very, very soon, like immin. Like, we just have to get a couple things lined up and then tickets will go on sale. We'll have a website up if you go to Rishi.com. We'll have it there, information for it. But it's going to be super awesome. It's going to be three hours of achievement hundreds up on stage, playing video games. We might have some surprise guests. We've had IAID, who's an awesome, awesome chiptunes artist. He's going to open for

us. So he's going to play for some time before we go up on stage It's at the Austin City limits theater downtown Austin and I'm very very excited for it And that's that's where you're giving the cat away. That's where you're giving the cat away Maybe bring the cat to it actually just have it up on stage You know you should do you should bring oh fucking bring the cat to it and just like Crowd surf Like cat And just like the cat crowdsur you are a terrible like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I mean, let's have some fun. Let's go. It's the ASP. Yeah. So anyway, Tickets Beyond Sale is going to be very recent.

We have some cool stuff. There's going to be some tiered tickets. There's a VIP ticket. That's going to be a little bit more expensive. But with that, we're going to have a party afterwards with a bunch of restri-teeth people. And so you'll be welcome to come to that as well. So don't be surprised when that pops up.

Those are limited number of seats. Yeah. It's already in both seats. It's going to be a lot of fun. It's one of those things where some people are kind of like, well, I want to stay home and watch it stream. It's not that lot of fun. It's one of those things where like some people are kind of like Well, I want to stay home and watch it stream. It's like that's it's not that kind of thing I think you have to treat this think of it like a concert or like a play like a theater thing like a book of Mormon Like Shakespeare. Yeah, like book of Mormon

And you guys are only gonna see and I'm not gonna see in my house and stream that you want to be there in the audience Right, and because of that we get to do stuff that you can't normally do on streams or broadcasts. We get to play music, which is going to be a lot of fun. We have some really, really cool things. Joel, can I go to the show? You're going to want to be there. Can I go to the show? He's not invited.

You're invited. You can bring him. Can I bring him as a date? Yes. Sweet. Blaine, you're invited. I got it. Inbite from the primary source.

You need to back up. You need to second down. We're actually going to shave you you on stage like from head to toe That's part that's actually intermission so in between sets you're gonna bring you out and shave you Let's do that. All right cool. There we go. And they're gonna you're gonna take his hair just put at it to your So again the only time you'll ever be able to see all the rest of the are all the achievement hundred people up on stage is of RTX So this is like a super like condensed version of RTX at the ACL theater, the Moody Theater.

Now that's a huge landscape. Uh, no. So it's just all not different. What? No, it's not like this. It's not not. So you never like, not the chest. No, that's right.

What are you talking about? I mean, you know, I'm not only, it's just, I mean, if you think about it, Joel and I, I mean, I'm I mean, if you think about it, Joel and I man's cave, I mean, I'm just saying if you think about it, if there's something growing, and it's just never, I mean, it's never been, is it like, he's not on your penis? I mean, it could be like, I mean, if it's like four feet or something,

you don't want that. It's not like that. It's something that's you don't want that work like that. It's not like you know where armpit hair has like it doesn't grow past it. It's a cat. Is that how does it grow? Does that happen with with I've never experienced that but does that happen?

Does arm armpit hair does not grow past a certain point? Is that true? Do you shave your armpits like it's like I can't easily do. I'm a super Adam. I had a move to the wall. I can't admit you shape it. I move to the water Jack really I should have moved that would feel so really weird. I don't know.

No, no. I'm shaking my head. We already have to. No, I believe that one person talking at a time. I ran into the time. I ran into talking. All right. What did you have to? Would you have to? Do you have a question? No, it's just Gus is on my shoulder right now being like, nobody can understand anything. Is Gus here? Is he here?

I don't like it. How is, what? No, it's like, where is Gus? Gus is on my shoulder. Oh, I get it. Okay. That's freaking me out, man. Why is, why is Gus your angel on your shoulder?

Yes, he's always, no, he's like, that's a lot for your podcast. But people like hearing the conflict and like, can't hear anything, it's not, well, they think it's funny. Gus is already like turning and is not grave. Gus is on whatever. podcast but people like hearing the conflict and like turning in is not grave because we had like Maryl and people talking off camera. Oh, all right.

The conversation going on. That's what I wanted to say was it was let's play live. Simmer 17 tickets are going out sale very very soon. So as soon as they go on sale, I'm information for that up at Ruchie.com or Twitter, Ruchie Teeth and my Twitter and everything else So there you go. All right. I'm gonna get the hell out of your hair. I think you should hang out. I gotta go feed an EP So I'll be back. What's an EP? An executive producer. We have an EP on set tonight over at Leisure Team Yeah, so I'm gonna go ahead and have a look at them. I don't know cats. I took one to Kirby Lane. Where should I take this guy?

Kirby Lane is awesome. We argue about this concept It's a restaurant open all time. It's open 24 7 and for those of us who did not have a chance to have breakfast in our Why do you think like special people they have breakfast? They have everything on 24 to always talk to me really every time you're there. It's just It's all right. It's all right. It's good that you Diner thing no way no no Every time I talk to you and correct sir. I'm sure you're a diner food. No way no no Incorrect. I'm like a chocolate chip pancake in correct. You're a member of ISIS

Okay, where should I take this guy? So I've done I mean we've done curbillian before 24 diner 24 down on on seventh or on sixth whatever that is yeah Chewies Chewie still open this I don't know Kate wears k-so we can get get K so pretty much anywhere often Austin Texas in yeah, you can get out of your sink Cold and then That would be good to all of you some chips Although they're leadings break into the places through pipes and vents and stuff that would be you don't want to pick the wrong Right, that would be all of them. Maybe that is the way to go right all right 24-9. That's a good idea

All right, we had an animal if you had to pick an animal big will cat there was gonna kill you What animal would it be? Bingo cat. I know that was gonna kill me Yeah, you had to be something quick like it have to be like a like I mean would I help it kill me or would it be like I'm fighting it And then I die You're fighting it and then you die. Oh God. I'm trying to think won't be the quickest big you want to know I don't want to be in pain. I'd rather if I know I was gonna die. I'd rather just I have a dancer

I have a good answer like I'll put my head under like an elephant foot or something like that or like Like a hippo's mouth, but like if I'm hippos or the true king of the jungle. So that's the most dangerous thing. There's like no one like a shark thinks that shark on a bite you, but it's not going to kill you immediately. There's a game. There's a game that's going to drown you. I thought it would be a shark until we play depth.

And if you play depth and you get attacked by a shark, they did such a great job of getting attacked in that game Yeah, like not only get shark You know what I would pick I would pick like a highly poisonous spider That's not a bad idea because it bites you in your sleep No, no Like the blood blood Read up about read up about that shit you get well. Yeah, but're a banana spider, just look up banana spiders and like the venom all

You'll fuck you up a lot. Yeah, but I mean I would rather go the way of a subtle venom Versus like oh my face is being oh that What if you could have a weapon like you knew that you still weren't gonna survive But you can at least like... They can get a gun, shoot yourself. No, you're not going to survive. My animal is an AK-47. Like if you had like a samurai sword and you were fighting a bear. Like so you knew...

What the fuck? No, I think you're just like Calvin and Hobbesing it. Yeah. You're just adding stuff. You're mudding. You're mudding. An animal is going to kill you. What would you pick?

And that's the whole different question. If you're going to fight fight an animal what animal do you fight that's totally different question? Well, it's gonna kill you My thing is like I would want to survive as long as I possibly can I want it and I would try to like I would try to like I would try to not Not only that's the whole that's the whole thing the you're gonna die just one of us want to live as long as I can So you'd rather live like an extra five minutes of pure agony at pain before dying? We need to snap into the air. Brandon's in most.

Because at least you feel, it's better than not feel, but at least you feel like the worst pain you've ever felt and then you're dead. That's better than not feeling anything, man. You see what I'm gonna go out like a chump, I guess. Is that what I'm hearing, Brynn? It's like Harry Potter, when they come back from the dead, you know what's like the last thing they felt,

that's what they experienced. You don't want it to be an excruciating pain. You're gonna be like oh I know I know it would be aware of it right? I just would be like sitting there and just like starfish Was that a star on bed? Yeah, then you get to slowly revolve on your torsion Flying starfishes that just kind of you've heard about them. Not pitting those good. I heard that. He's a bad authority. Sorry, whoever has headphones on the air.

That was one of the starfishes. All right, I'm going to tell you how I hear it. Can I have my phone back? I'm like, how did you pick up on that? Huh? How did you know? Because I saw him take it out. It was right here and he grabbed it.

He was so proud, too. Oh, is he? He was like, little. Jack has a message from his dad. Papetilla. I don't know why. Oh, like Jack has a message from his dad Pat until I don't know why I do have a message my dad. What do you have to say he's piss at you about the cat? Oh no, oh my water got fucked up in my house, so I had to get that I had to go home like I'm gonna feed the cat with no water Oh no, it's already fixed. I took care of it. I got to repair this what I did. I really do hope that lady is listening Like I cast is like you know He's about that so I listening to the podcast, is like, you know, he's gonna be a shit about that. So what kind of load?

I got to repair to make it work, you better. I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be so happy. You're so happy, leaking, and then to shut down water for the whole apartment. For about five minutes, because I can't do it for a long period of time. All right. So it got like, express fixed.

It was awesome. It was a press fix. Do the deal where if you're sort of like, a bigger dude, then you're sort of toilet challenged. But you're so great. Bye everybody, you wanna kill this mic for I rip it off my chest? a bigger dude than your sort of toilet challenge. And that's what we've created. Hi everybody, you want to kill this mic for I rip it off my chest.

Like you think it's worth it to be shack? You know, because like, I get fucking all the money in the world, but yet every time you have to like do, you like cause like problem. Yeah, you want to do a special clog of toilet. You can't fit in cars. You know, you can't take your crap. I can't sit in back seat.

I bet you clogged toilets constantly. I bet bet he does there was stories about Andre the giant Oh man, I think he was just like fuck I'm just going to the bathtub I don't know I don't know how that works you know Turn and you just turn on the I don't know I don't know I mean I'm glad I'm not I have to deal with that this was a very but centric podcast it was very but centric what's up with that Joel you like but I'm not I'm not the leader of this group you brought up the ass I like girl butts go butts are nice yeah yeah

that's all under a good thing yeah how long is this is this when do we stop uh we have five minutes we're all right so can we not talk about assholes for five minutes? It's gonna be like five minutes of silence any other RT employees um jokes oh Can somebody go get the trophy the new trophy we have? I think it's on raised desk so On the spot just premiered a couple weeks ago, I think it's a really fun show. And it's just like an improv competition show and they got this trophy for it. And it's the most amazing thing, I feel like I've ever seen in the world.

It would be a little more amazing if it was made of chocolate. It was made of chocolate. You're a fucking probable. And then at the end of each episode, the winners had to eat it. I can't like put it in gold foil. You know, and you just open it up chocolate. Or if that's the last challenge, what would you do the next week? Well, but, well, then you gotta get another one.

You think, you know, you have to have a constant supply of chocolate. You have a real problem with chocolate. I really do. I have a like a chemical dish. We went to a restaurant in LA and there was a chocolate dessert that broke you of chocolate. We went to Los Angeles to work like a chemical. We went to a restaurant in LA and there was a chocolate dessert that broke you of chocolate

We went to Los Angeles to work on a commercial and Adam goes like we're we're talking about restaurants. Ha ha ha Let's go to the search for out. Let's go to that restaurant and Adam goes hey Let's uh Gordon Ramsay has a restaurant like actual Gordon Ramsay. Yeah, and we were like Fuck it. Let's go to the Gordon Ramsay restaurant and we went to the Gordon Ramsay yeah and we were like fuck it let's go to the Gordon Ramsay restaurant and we went to the Gordon Ramsay restaurant and at the Gatt Gordon Ramsay restaurant they had the seven-course meal which by the way at the Gordon Ramsay restaurant the seven-course meal consists of eight dishes it does it works awesome. And boy, the raging diarrhea you get after that place, classy. It is a black sea.

You just go back to the buttholes, Joel. That is an indoor. That is a byproduct diarrhea. You said asshole first. You can see that. I was waiting to get a close-up. It's raining. It's raining.

It's raining. It's raining. It's raining. It's raining. It's raining. It's raining. It's raining. It's raining. It's go. And asshole cut. It's funny. This is just, I don't know if you can see the details,

but it's a statue of Gus, and he's just, it's amazing. He really, we're in for him. We're in for him. Well, that's how he's, I mean, they captured his posture perfectly. How did they do that? Do you like 3D?

No, they did a three-dimensional scan. It was done by a company called Capture Dimensions. This is pretty fucking amazing, actually. Heavy. The colds. So the winner of on the spot every week gets that trophy. I think last week's champions were Ray and Ryan and this week they're going against Megan Lindsay I believe. So that's a good episode.

The girl team will be much classier. Don't know about grumbles. They'll know about grumbles and smurfs and I thought I grunt the grunt was the thing chasing down the smurfs right It's grunt a male everyone runs right? No, it's just murder like a giant daint chasing after it That would be wow, you know you would be funny is to make a kids cartoon where all of the characters are suddenly just like All right, I'm gonna stop now. I'm so at least Suddenly sexual organs. I'm sure that cartoon exists somewhere in the world. It probably does all the ideas are taken It's really sad. I know that is sad

When do you think that happened? What year was it like all right all the ideas have been used? We'll wind it the internet catch on was really what we're asking right. So I mean, I don't know probably in the OTS. It really was like 1904. Like everything in a hearty pit down. Well maybe, maybe. Well I mean that's, that's, I mean yeah I don't know. I mean if it's 1904, there's shit you can't touch.

Like I can't think of a single thing that we can't talk about now. If you think of a single issue. Yeah. That we can't talk about now. Do you think of a single issue that we can't talk about? No, I mean, it's like you've seen everything that exists in the world, anything that happens anywhere you instantly know about it, everybody's already thought about it. No, but even from a hands-off, you can't really talk. Oh, like things are taboo. Yeah, like 9-11 or whatever, right? You couldn't have a show about buttholes in 1904 yeah what was a lot of that yeah like

in 1904 you can have a show about anything yeah I mean it's just sort of like you know show there are taboo topics now what like what oh I don't bring them up the taboo well I'm believe you bring them up counterpoint yeah I mean South Park can bring anything up it's amazing how we've just the way with it. Accepted South Park can do anything you know what that is. But they handle it in a good, they always handle it in a measured way where and so everyone accepts that right where it's just sort of like they take they do a good job of sort of offering the middle ground. I think I think, I totally agree with you, but I feel like if someone else did the same thing in the same way and treated it the right way

They would still get so much more shit But there's something about South Park where we're just like yeah, I mean if you did it like how they're doing it In that exacting way, they just be copying almost right. Yeah, so I mean Yeah, but I don't know what we're talking about anymore I'm not are we allowed see we're not allowed to talk about this, because it's on another podcast probably. Oh, is that a taboo if we get it, other podcasts? What's going to happen when we're at podcast 1000?

Like, how many, like, there's going to be nothing? Like, what will we do? When we get the podcast 1000, we're just going to add fake moustaches and just replay the same one, just fake moustaches. All right, so we just added them. 1000 1000 well, it's roughly 700 away so 700 We're gonna be a podcast that's gonna be 13 and a half years from now I'm not we probably won't be around here. We're gonna hit podcast 100 I think in four weeks or so

103 100 100 sorry 300 podcasts 100 podcasts. I'm joking Yeah, 300 and 300 podcasts. 100 podcasts. I'm joking. 300. And how many weeks? Two weeks we're going to be at the 300th podcast. That is bananas. What are you guys planning? Yeah, what are we doing? Strap.

Bring in second girl. I think there's a certain idea that's been floated around that I think we all think is pretty cool, but we definitely want to keep it as a surprise we dress as Leonidas What it was not about but holes because we kind of yeah, and it's not about blains abs either shot that no but holes Hey, how many how much how much can best been press bench press? Yeah, oh like are you talking about which are max a max It's been about years since they did like a like a set of like eight reps. Oh, I don't know which one what Last I did it was a year ago like to 90. Did you guys go workout before this podcast? I prefer on the podcast. I would have worked out regardless

I wanted to get a workout in that I can really I really only get motivated to work out with other people and Blaine's a sort of a hard guy to get a workout with nowadays. He's so cool and Finally, I got a convenient. I got to convince him to go workout with me today. There's no convincing. I was good at gym with you. Hey, we ran into a fan. It was cool. You were in your Ruchty shirt. We ran to a guy named Adam. He's like, hey, you guys from Ruchty's running. Yeah, it's like I'm listening to the podcast right now. I was like, well, we're about to be on the podcast. Yeah, so it's pretty cool.

Well, why don't we just have a podcast where it's just you're on a stair step or the entire fucking time That who no, that's horrible. I would I would be I would feel like I'm getting more out of my time if I were on a step Stairsteper during the entire thing for the whole or something because I need I got to figure out a way to fit in a workout I used to listen to podcasts when I went to the gym Those were the worst workouts I ever had because I kept up in the stop because I was laughing so fucking hard Well, that's the additional abdominal workout All right um Shrapa

We got how does the rabble work do we say our names? Yeah Take it about Joel Heyman Adam Ellis No no no no How does the rabble work? Do we say our names? Yeah, I'm sure. Everybody, take a bow. Joel Heyman, Adam Ellis. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, play on Tuesday and on the spot on Thursday. So a bunch of cool stuff. Try to check it out. Is this where we end it? I guess. We should just, or we're just going to sit here till how long can we sit here before you you roll the credits? Girl. Girl. Does girl get credit? 1 tbh 1 tbh 1 tbh 1 tbh 1 tbh

1 tbh 1 tbh 1 tbh 1 tbh 1 tbh 1 tbh 1 tbh 1 tbh 1 tbh Do you like apples?

Example. Together in trumpet hosts, German columns, German columns are free of ideas of nothing to do with this podcast. Analyze various unsolved and rooster teats cryptic podcasts F**k face. Call to action. Feel free to add something show premise specific but short. Listen to show name on Apple Spotify or wherever you get podcasts. It's f**k face a podcast. Subscribe or know. You do yes? Whatever you get podcasts, it's f*** face, a podcast.

Subscribe or no, you do yes?