Rooster Teeth Podcast - RT Podcast #315

Episode Date: March 18, 2015

RT Discusses Science from SXSW Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's time to put your pedal to the metal. From the twisted minds behind Deadpool and Zombieland, an executive producers will learn that an Anthony Mackie comes a new Peacock original series, Twisted Metal, a high-octane action comedy based on the classic video game series. Anthony Mackie stars as John Doe, a motormouth outsider who must deliver a mysterious package across a post-apocalyptic wasteland. If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnett, and Thomas Hayden Church. Twisted metal, streaming now now only on peacock Hey Welcome to the received podcast welcome to the college basketball playoffs

So what do you think the team looks like out there in the universe? I think the field looks great. You know, they have some new stuff. All teams are coming into this off big wins. You know, neither one of them was expected to beat the number one seat. They both did somehow. So today should be an exciting matchup. Both, you say. Listen, go fuck yourself with that. I've been saying both since I was like eight years old. So I ran away for a minute. Let's do quick intro. Like, do you know that joking red versus blue actually came from my buddy Jason Sagawa, who would make fun of me is for for saying both. Just do quick entrance. You know that joking red versus blue actually came from my buddy Jason's a gal Who would make fun of me is for saying both?

I'm surprised not meeting from me making fun of you for saying both I know this is Gus Gavin Bye, bruh and This is Bernie so I stepped away for a second to go work on an issue and I came back and all of a sudden my my laptop is covered in drinks now I put your margarilla on your trackpad I Have never cringed more in my life. She didn't want me to do it And she couldn't look at it once I done it because it was leaving a big ring Barbara's a good friend Because I was trying to fix something in my lap my fucking track

I also unerotic to what Just like get it off get it off get it off get it off get it off get it off get it off get it off get it off Why does war to affect the capacitive feedback? I think it was I think it was the cold believe it or not the cold I felt like it was sticking in it wasn't working right because it's too cold there was too cold usually the warmth of your fingers the thing that moves the track pad right yeah but it's not one of the temperature bases it do you even know that electricity

maybe the electricity wouldn't condense isn't isn't heat isn't electricity just heat well i was better i think you have here we go so isn't electricity just heat is the matter for a here we go. So, isn't electricity just heat? Let's think about that first time here. I mean, the stylist isn't heated.

Yes, you're good point. A stylist is not heat. No, you hold it. I'm gonna stay this, but just in the tip of it. What did you get me? I put that on the list to collect some water later. It's a margarita? Yeah, it's a margarita in a vodka soda.

You want to give it cheers? Gus? Cheers to South by Southwest and the Internet. And we should probably explain this to people who are not watching the video version of this podcast that we are We are broadcasting live from the punny acts Silverton Now we are at South by Southwest and we are at our venue where we've been for like the last week of South by Southwest seems like it Yeah, I have various parties and fun stuff like that

The audience here all the people in the bar. They can probably pick it up a little bit I can I can hear you can't really see them that well because they're actually down a level from us but there's a bunch of people like here just like mooching off of free drinks. They're also not paying attention to our podcast. No, I'd say. Look at that. You got a group right there. They're all paying attention to them taking pictures. They're looking at their phone. They're watching the stream on the phone. Oh really? Guys, we're right here. You don't need to look at your phone. You can live it. I'm sure they can't hear us, except through our headsets. Why not?

So, I'm right off the bat, fucking disgusting story I want to talk about. Did you read about the British Airways flight today? No. There was a British Airways flight that took off from Heathrow, bound for Dubai. That's disgusting. They get out, they take off about 30 minutes into the flight. They had to turn the plane. It was a 747.

It turned 747 around to go back to the landing Heathrow. Queue, guess why? Why do you name the how big the plane was? I mean, it's important to the story. Oh, yes, guess why? I'm going to guess that someone had explosive dire. Oh, my lord. That's my guess.

I'm going to guess that somebody in first class is my favorite airline range story of all time. Somebody recreated that guy who got so drunk that he dumped over the drink cart and then took a poop on it. Was that was that your art department? No he beat on a plane. No no no no no no no. That's our name and names. I can try to look it up if I get an internet connection here. So you were really close Barbara. Someone took a shit so nasty on the plane that it's stank up the entire plane. Really? They had to turn it around. The pilot had to come on the plane that it's stank up the entire plane. Really? They had to turn it around.

The pilot had to come on the intercom and tell people, don't worry about that smell. It's not a technical problem. It's just liquefied human excrement. Wow. We're liquefied. Wait, did they actually know the person who did it? No.

Because I would feel that that is an epic shit. Can you imagine a shit? Turn a plane around? If you took a poop and it was like delayed everyone's travel plans that spring break. One guy had to wait 15 hours for the next flight. Let's make a poop and it's like delayed everyone's travel plans that spring break One guy had to wait 15 hours for the next flight What's that one guy had to wait 15 hours for the next flight because it went back and they had to cancel the flight What would be the reason for that?

You had to put it like on the reason why your plane was delayed somebody had to poop somebody You got a nasty shit also that's really early in the flight like they're still climbing this dude's like I got it Go so many like I asked the question here, which is most obvious in my mind Was did he poop in the bathroom or did he just poop in the seat? I believe it was in the bathroom could they not just like pull What down there and like question like what was it doing? Was it I didn't go down? I don't know that's all I know is that someone took a shit so Dastien playing around with his eight is amazing. He was so bad that I remember a parliament had to make a public statement on television about can you imagine taking a shit so powerful

politician has to get on TV and talk about it What if it was just a really weird bet like a guy bet another guy is like turn a plane around using only Uranus This entire box of X-Lax What he came up with was that And what's going to happen? That's what he came up with, was that? I think it's so many better things. I assume he didn't use the courtesy flush or anything. You usually do when you shit in a public area. I don't think this shit would be contained by courtesy flush. You see like a courtesy nuke and on the other hand. You're like, well these public areas you've been taking dumps in.

No, I mean anytime you take a crap in a public area where there's a plane or a restaurant. I know, hold on. Let's address the issue that Gavin was bringing up here. Barbara Duncanman. Yes. Do you poop in public? Absolutely. Really out in the open one of my sidewalks? No, I'm just kidding. So you would like go to dinner and then just go and take a dump in the restaurant. If I have to, not just for fun. Gavin, what's wrong with that? No, no, I'm just asking some people. Some people don't do that. Like Gavin is the person. I can't control my shit times. Yeah, I'm with Barbara.

Yeah, like. If you gotta go, you gotta go. But you're acting like you've never heard of this before, like that people don't go the bathroom out. Right, but those people are psychotic. Right. So, I mean, there's no reason to encourage that kind of behavior.

No, I think people establish that in school, like they don't poop at school. And then they carry that through the rest of their life, like they don't poop at work. You just know you're gonna be away from poo, from pooing for a long time. and you do it before you go. Here's the thing, with me, I prefer shitting in public than shitting at my significant other's house. Oh, it's like, I'm down with you.

Because the significant other has one bathroom. Yeah. And, uh... You gotta keep the magic live, Barb. Yeah. You're doing the right thing. You gotta keep it mysterious. Barb's a hot chick.

You gotta keep up the, doesn't even poop, then go as long as you can. I don't fart either If I do it smells like popery or poopy Pupery when you do that do you like charge up? I go Teenage charge enough for the night. Yeah Just wrote it. I just have flowers that come out instead of smell what time my My wife went into a polar crust room and she came out

She goes man. I can't believe it. It smells like shit in there. I was like you know what? I'm glad it smells like shit in there That's the one place in this whole building that it should smell like shit. The smell should be contained in that room. Why was she so surprised? I didn't know that she was like, oh yeah, you're right. That's a really good point.

Somebody turned the mall around and fluid back to the UK because somebody pooped at the mall. But I know I totally feel you. Whenever, I think I've said this before, but whenever I go to a hotel with Ashley, I never, never, ever use the restroom in the room. You can't, right? I do.

I go down the lobby. I destroy it. You're married, you can, yeah, you don't care. To be fair, a hotel lobby toilet is a pretty nice tip. They are. Yeah, and they're usually like not occupied. Can I tell you a secret that I've learned? Don't go to the lobby, go to the second floor.

We're all like the conference rooms and stuff, aren't we? I've always done that. That's like super traveler pro tip. Yeah. If you need, if you find a bathroom, look for a hotel, go to the second floor. Yeah, go to like a or a few like at 1 a.m. wake up. Like where the little is and stuff or the conference rooms.

Conference rooms. You should write like a poo book. The travel. The travel is that would be a lot. That would probably be very well. It would be one sentence. People can read it while they go the bathroom in different places. Like, oh, that's where I screwed up.

Don't boot by the 747. How many bathroom? How many bathroom? I saw a 747 as the, it's got two stories up at the fructs. First classes up top. You say figures, they've got two labs up there, two in the front. How many so much thought this is? Four in the middle, maybe another four in the back.

It's got to be like 12 bathrooms on a 7.4. You think with 12 bathrooms, that'd be like an ab geneta. You think they were a plane that's flying to the sky, they could just hit a button and kind of flush all the air out of the plane. Some guy that just sits on the plane every flight, just planes to the bathroom. So I look at a bug cleaner and a fly that's not insane.

I guess if they're, yeah, they're stewardesses and stuff. You think they should suck all the air out of the plane. It seems like, listen, I know the air of the plane. It seems like I'd listen I know the cabin of a plane is pressurized But it does seem like there would be some way to vent the cabin in an emergency Like just I say everyone hold that breath for a second. We're just gonna You know you just do it. Oh, yeah, I said Let's do it a little bit

No, you think what they could have done is like it'd be the one time that you could deploy the oxygen masks. I mean, like, listen, we're fine. We have plenty of pressure. We're just gonna drop the oxygen mask so you can get some fresh air. Why did they do that for the plane that got turned around? Yeah, they should have done that.

I was gonna say, yeah. Well, I don't think that, eh, last, very long. It's been a long, a long time. Oh, is that true? Well, it lasts long enough for the plane to go into breathable. I mean, you just go like this,

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, I'm gonna stay it down, into breathable altitude or into the ocean, into the water. Yeah, then it lasted that long, right? Yeah, and then stay it down. Indebreedable altitude or into the ocean, into the one. Yeah, you know, then it lasted that long, exactly. Yeah, go for a little swim. I can imagine that that mask dropped. And the oxygen came on, that that would be like the

staleest, stinkiest air ever. Because airplane air is already like that. Yeah, but you can't smell oxygen. But it's not a tank of oxygen. What is it? It's an oxygen generator. So when it drops, the process of it falling and you pulling on the cord, it activates a canister

which creates a chemical reaction that generates oxygen. I thought you would say, you pull it down, had to let me coax this. No, no, no, no. When you pull it, it just pulls a little pin off the generator. Just open those and the plane then. And fill the plane with oxygen. It's like space balls. It's like a big one and just pull then. And fill the plane with oxygen. It's like space balls.

It's like a big one and just pull the cord. And you got oxygen. It's just like space balls. Did you guys ever have to use that thing in an airplane, an oxygen mask? No, but I know somebody who was on a plane that they had decompression of the cabin, and which means that it was a leak.

Yeah, or something, and all the breathable ash show out. They were flying along at like 35,000 feet. They was halfway between San Antonio and Denver, I believe. Flying along and all of a sudden the plane went like this. And just like, just dropped. And they had, what he said first, what the first indication was, his ears popped really hard.

And then he heard a noise, it sounded like 50 shotguns going off. And that was the mask dropping down. Cause they don't just like open. They get thrown down with an airbag It's amazing how many Explosives are in vehicles is like a safety measure like an airbag is an explosion that fills a bag And we recently filmed a video down an eye where there's these things called seat belt pretensioners

Which is when an airbag goes off to prevent your lower half from sliding away your seat belt gets yanked down And it uses explosives to like fire your seatbelt down. Really? And we filmed it in slow mode. It's fast, it's hell. Just like little explosive charge like this in the seatbelt. You know what I gotta say? We go out in my car sometimes and just see how fast we can make it go, because it's the electric car that goes like 0.163 seconds. That car, if you hit it will lock your seatbelt every single time, just the acceleration on it. It's still weird just feeling still. I still can go right. It's like when you take off in a roller coaster, one of those like short track roller coasters. It's the same

kind of feel like a rocket. It shoots you out. Yeah, you're not used to feeling in a car. So it's like very disorienting. So we went out to a lovely brunch the other day. I hesitate to bring up in front of Gus because he was not invited. What? Yeah, we went to a lovely brunch. I love brunch. Do you? No. hate brunch I can't even what a hate brunch is terrible I'm gonna be telling you what I'm telling you Gavin how dare you ask you that I invited you you bitched about going for two weeks why you on about I knew you were about this do you want to see the text just read them out like this is what I can't it It was like, it was like, we might get fined for this cursing on the internet.

I love that we always talk about. We always talk about text message conversations, but then when it comes to podcasts, we can never read any of them. I know. It's not so much. But you were like, you were like, brunch, brunch, and then like something came up to the point where we might not be able to do brunch. You were like, ah, shit, we can't do brunch.

And I was like, what's the big deal about this brunch? It's obsessed with this brunch. I was just questioning why this brunch was so important. Like, who is the brunch? When you have like a nice big group brunch plan, it's exciting. I get really excited about this. The one brunch has lost all meaning.

First of all, I didn't plan the brunch. I actually plan the brunch. And I got, so I wrote it, so we invited people to the brunch. Where'd you go? We went to St. Philip, which is... That sounds awful. It's gonna sound weird. Yeah. It's a pizza place. Oh, I've been there, yeah. But that's made by We went to St. Philip, which is... That sounds awful. It's gonna sound weird. Yeah. It's a pizza place. Oh, I've been there. Yeah.

But that's made by the people who do Uchi, which is like... There's a weird thing, I really think we've ever talked about Uchi on the podcast. It's like, we usually go to like Gordo's and home slice and stuff like that. Uchi is a sushi restaurant that's in the middle of Texas, in Austin, Texas. And it's probably the best sushi I've had anywhere ever. It's one of the best food periods. Yeah, one of the best food period. Yeah, and it's like we don't go there We often because it's pretty pricey, but it's it's weird because like everyone's first reaction when they hear that the sushi restaurant in Austin They can't possibly be any good and it's bar none the best one I've ever been to in my life It's it's probably the best restaurant in Austin when you sat the sushi bar? Yeah, I watched them make it.

That's really cool. How about doing it that way? I think they get overpaid for just cutting a fish. Am I looking at it wrong? It's just like a dude cutting a fish. But they're soy season fish. They have to have high quality fish. You're paying not only for the dude cutting the fish.

You're paying for all the work that goes into getting that particular fish there in that moment. Also, the fish is more expensive itself. You should try to make sushi. I think I went to Whole Foods in Mod. Sushi grade or sashimi You should try to make sushi. I have, I think I went to the Whole Foods in Mod, sushi grade or sashimi grade. Sushi grade sushi. Yeah, sashimi grades tuna and just cut it at home and ate it like that. That wasn't quite the same experience. Did you see, ever see, so just be standing on my sink eating fish. You know, you're like a cat.

There's that TV show that Gordon Ramsay has a kitchen nightmare, and he did an episode here in Austin It's like where he goes to a restaurant that's failing and tries to help them. And as part of that, when he was here in town filming, he had to do a promo thing, the local Fox affiliate to promote his TV episode and everything. And I remember watching it because I was getting ready for work or something. And he came on and he did not talk about the TV show at all. He just was like, hey have you guys heard about this restaurant Uchi? It's amazing right there the other day and all he did

for the whole segment was just talk about Uchi and they're like, what you want to talk about your TV show is oh yeah, Kitchen Nightmares. That's the best ad you can possibly love. Yeah seriously. That's really awesome. Yeah so this place is place we went from brunch is a pizza place made by the guys who made Uchi and it's really awesome like I got to see there was a brisket hash Yeah, I had that too. Oh, did you have that? It's fucking amazing. It's like brisket like it's like gourmet poutine It's like it's like Friday with brisket and cheese and slices of potato. Yeah, it was amazing or potato if you're like Gavin What did you have Gavin the lovely brunch? I'm a bull pizza He had pizza at the pizza place. Yeah, I felt it

I'm a meable pizza. He had pizza at the pizza place. Yeah, I felt it. That I would like. So my problem with brunch is it's neither breakfast nor lunch. That's the best part of it. No. No, you leave your blowing my mind right now. It's satisfying.

I think it's not there. I think it's both. No, it's like a pale version of breakfast. Look, a pale version of lunch. And what any one it to be is the beauty of the brunch. No, if you've got a pizza, guess what? You ate lunch, motherfucker. I'm okay with that.

Yeah, that's the brunch place. What if you got the brisket hash that had brisket and eggs? No. That's both breakfast and lunch. You know why? Because breakfast is bullshit. Well, I tried to find the conversation that I had with Gavin about brunch.

Yeah, so I looked up brunch in my messages. Yeah. Way too many conversations came up that include the word brunch. So I think I need to Reimani, 25 conversation down. I need to real, way, way, way, way. Well, I was excited to see Becca and her kid. She had a lovely little baby. I haven't seen her ages. It was nice to see her. Clementine. Clement. Have you ever met Clementine before? No, never. I've only seen the hundreds and hundreds of pictures and videos of so Becca is who played Sister in red versus blue she and she was actually one of our earliest teacher models as well and Yeah, so she had a kiddo about four months ago. Clemen time and we had a we had some first good staring contests Oh, that's a cute. I lost all of them. That's a cute baby. It's like the perfect baby. It's like a Gerber baby

Yeah, it has like a perfectly round face giant blue eyes, and it's just like happy as good Yeah, but then old babies have blue eyes look at Gus just checking out of this conversation. He's just like the Babies if I ride pretty cool Hey, I don't want babies, but I could still appreciate the cuteness. You don't want kids? No not really ever ever Yeah, I used to when I was younger, but let's make a bet you'll shit kid out one day You're You'll be on the 737 Let's make a bet you'll shit kid out one day you're You're You're gonna

We had a baby upside down in the bug Baby man, I like that we're gonna have a science expert on here so far. We compared electricity And Barbara's gonna shit What about you you gonna shut out baby? I think there should be vents on airplanes. You almost lost a baller. I'm not even sure anything's functional down there It works. I want to take a fatilist When you we should do one live on the podcast. I'll do it. Why not? We should like have like a curtain off area We go jerk it. I can preach it. I don't know. I'll live on the podcast

During our discussion. We to the microscope in the count I'm curious I have a question for Gavin which is after you had your accident which evolved your testicle left testicle right Testicle left as that so your left testicle. Yeah, I feel like I knew that you're not as an absurdly large scot Oh, no kidding because it's you would think it would be like this big But the testicle at the time was like this big. I really get in there. Could you walk like? I just look like a cowboy.

I look like a sound horse but that was no horse. The horse was your left nut. Oh my god. And around the last stretch is left nut. I wasn't winning anyway. So I'm curious. Did that when you had that problem with your testicle. Yeah, did that affect your output? Like you need a volume or Like your semen output.

I'm wondering if he was more productive as a person. Yeah, I could write really fast stuff that you're clarification for the audience. It could have been urine. I appreciate it. Why would it be urine? Why wouldn't it be semen? You're the perverted one here. You just said output. He's just mad about brunch.

He's just a skeptical. I was being dumb. You were right. I'm banjining Gus now. Don't let him out. Don't listen. Don't make me mad. I have to let him avoid a question.

Every time I ask a question, he makes me mad so he can avoid it. Did it affect your semen volume? Well, I told the story about how I couldn't, you know, monk my bean for a while. Oh, yeah. Monk your bean. Like three weeks went by. Three weeks.

And you know what happens, if you don't do anything for three weeks. It becomes serious. Yeah, you take a plane trip to Scotland. That's what happens. A baby comes out. No, but it was weird. I told the story because it was like, I felt like it had in the night and that but nothing was happening and that there was nothing happened. And then when I woke up the next morning, it all happened. So I was like, I don't

know whether I was dreaming. I love your use of it happens. It's happening. It happens. I just think we're on Paul. Yeah, it's bedroom. It happened. So we had a cool thing happen today. For example, we should talk about this. Um, we won South by Southwest's most valuable online channel. How do they determine value? Um, we vote people vote. It's like most valuable player kind of a thing. It's just like just the best is basically what that says. And so of course, I'm sure a lot of people at South by Southwest after we run that award tuned into this podcast for the first time when we talk about pooping on planes for 20 minutes straight. So it's got like a well deserved, but it has value. Yeah, but we should, we should thank the audience for that because it was, I think, purely votes.

I think they should thank us. No, I'm just kidding. Absolutely. Thank you guys. Absolutely. Yeah, you guys voted. That's the kind of thing where it's like, whenever there's an award where you have to like vote for it, I'm always very reluctant to go out to the audience and like say, hey, we're up for this award,

I just don't like doing that. Yeah, I feel like that. There's one going on right now and we're just not talking about it honestly. Yeah, it's like, it's cool if it happens, it happens. And I know the audience will say, you guys do that occasionally, you know, or all the time, you guys did it like six months ago or you guys did it a year ago. But there's like 40 other ones in between that we just don't even mention that I'll be selective yeah it's just it's just you know don't ask too much but we

do appreciate you guys vote for that and getting as most valuable online channel itself by Southwest it's great because it's it's a local award I can do it I think it's the only local award we've ever won oh no I should say that because the Austin American Statesman oh yeah for the social media company of the year and then the Chronicle gave us best video game studio. We're gonna make, we're gonna think about making a video game one day. You watch out.

We basically fall about the best game ever. Right, that was, that was a very weird distinction to get, especially because we know so many people who work hard in video games. Yeah, I mean, also the Ruby game is kind of like, in the works right now. Getting to the works. It's an, it's an alpha.

Yeah, be like when in best picture because we're working on laser to get a game in alpha. A game in alpha is every game these days. How many alpha? Is that alpha? I flip to three years. You know about my intrusive, you know all about it. I've lived to for three years.

Gavin, are you gonna get mad at me for correcting you when you're from mispronounce? It's a correction. You know corrections. I don't do like talk about your dumb accent and say how wrong it is. You know how I'm not playing. You're just, you're from mispronounced. It's a correction. You know, correction. I don't do like talk about your dumb accent and say how wrong it is. You know, I'm not playing in juice. You're outnumbered.

Our accent is right here. You just did like five minutes ago when I said, snooker. And you go, snooker. Snooker. You got so upset with me. What do you say? Snook and I go, yes, you go.

All right, fair play. Yeah. I mean, it's just a topic of this. We were all doing our sportscaster impressions before we went live with the podcast. and I was doing NCAA basketball and football and Gavin went to snooker. Why? Because I was doing it. I was going to the last step back. Now he went to snooker. I used to play it was a sketch show, right?

How's Tottenham doing? I've not been keeping up with him. They're playing Man You. Oh, I don't know. I saw... You know, he's doing great. Fucking Crystal Palace. Fucking...

Don't even talk to me about football. Don't even talk to me about football. You'll just ignore text We're supposed to make it up. You say we're gonna make it up when I'm waiting on you What was that plan? Oh my god, do you remember I'll show you the text message? Okay, I don't want to ruin it Okay, sorry. I'm gonna you guys were at our party. Oh, I remember it. Yes. Yeah, we should do that next week. Yes So I sent I it's rare Gavin and I Talk a lot like we see each other in the office But it's rare that Gavin and I text each other like it just doesn't happen that frequently Because of the hatred. Yeah, because of the hatred earlier today

I saw something online that I thought would be a really cool flow mo guys thing. So I Giff. Yeah, I sent it to Gavin. I was like this would be really cool to see in slow motion. And I like instantly he replied showing me a video he had already filmed the exact same thing. I just happen to film it two weeks before and I was like yes it does look cool. Can you tell you what it was? No, I'm coming video. Yeah, I'll put out soon. Okay, so soon. And it was like instantly I got to see like he sent me like he filmed with his phone like a quick little preview of the video. It's headed to me. I do that all the time.

If you look at the internet messaging history of you, me, Gavin, it's usually just me sending him a gift of something, like, just with a great song. We were, we were, we talked quite a lot about the stuff that I haven't filmed yet. There's a picture of me holding up the giant balloon before it was inflated. Yeah. It's like this big. And I'm holding it up, showing it to you. I sent a screenshot of me doing that. And your reply was, you're gonna break that camera and I was like Like 50 million views now. No, it's like 78 In that crazy that's impossible. That's that's more than number of people are in the world It's more than the amount of people in England

Is that true? There's more than 78 million people in the UK. I think UK is like 65 million. Wow That's morning That's like 12,000 people in Canada. I think Canada's like 35 million or so. 33 or 34. I'm always blown away by the stats of Canada and how pretty much everyone just lives right next to the border of the US. I think it's 90% of the people live within 100 miles

of the border. 90% are fucking insane. Yeah, the other don't leave their house ever. Because it's fucking cold. And there's a polar bear down the street waiting for them to come out. Even within 100 miles of the border, it's still like negative 25 in the winter. So your house, your Jewish house in Canada.

How far away is that from the pool? In my house? Just a regular house. Just a normal one every day. Well, my house is in Ottawa, Ontario. So that's probably within 100 miles. You don't know? I don't know.

No, I know Montreal. And no, I must be. How far are you to London? At your house and your place, you run to a mall and say about 48 miles? Oh really, you're only 48 miles from London. Yeah, it's not bad. It's not bad. It depends where in London.

It's about 100 kilometers. That's right. 40 miles from the mall. No. It's 1.6 miles to a kilometer. Oh, no. 1.6 kilometers to a mall one to oh no 1.6 kilometers Okay, yeah, I thought I had a totally backwards. I need another one You know someone is probably gonna call me out for not knowing how many miles Ottawa is from the American boys

I think it's really normal. That's why I said what the London is? You can just say it very old Well you would guys wouldn't drive down to the US for any reason In fact, we have somebody here who came down from Canada and wanted to come to the event Yeah, and she couldn't get in because she's 19 because it's 21 and up club. That's a boo It is a little it's and I was like I'm sorry and she's from Canada where it's like all the clubs are 18 and up You know what it means? So it's just like like Quebec and Quebec is 18 up and everywhere else it's 19 I was gonna French thing. I don't know actually there are some promises where it's 18 up I just don't know awesome off because when I'm as younger we would always drive out to Baton Rouge or go to New Orleans to go drink

Baton Rouge is in Louisiana at Mexico. We could drink when we were 13 I mean if you could order it you could drink it Yeah, and then when we were 18 we could go to Louisiana to drink Yeah, so we would go to Louisiana to drink and then if I recall correctly Gus there was some issue where the federal government said if they didn't change the 21 They were gonna take away their federal funds for interstate. Right. They're DOT funding. Yeah, the DOT funding, department transportation funding.

That was like a foreign language. Well, that stuff that you just said. Well, yeah, it's very specific to America. And the case is 18 across the world. And I think that happened, like that Louisiana thing was, I mean, relatively speaking, not that long ago like 95 96 something like that Yeah, I think that mid-90s. Yeah, cuz I mean I it was it didn't affect me cuz I was already 21 So it was like must have been like mid late 90s. Yeah, that's that's crazy to me to think that You know they were they held on to their own standard for so long they didn't give a shit Louisiana doesn't care

Man, they are totally different like everything when you go into Louisiana It's slightly different like there's no counties there. They have parishes. Oh, is that what a parishes? Yeah a parishes a county Oh, there's no counties in Louisiana don't call them that I'm a really annoying first-world problem Go ahead sometimes it's fun to talk about those bring them on the iPhone 6 plus. Yeah, right? The screen is is is it not white is it wider? It is wider. For some reason, instead of stretching the space bar to be longer to match the screen, the enter, the go button is longer. Could I see?

Which pushes the full stop over into the space bar. So whenever I search something on Safari, there's a dot between every word instead of a space. If I do, do you have that? When you Google something, you put it all in. I'm trying to write it. I heard that of a space. Like, do you have that when you Google something? You put it all in. I'm trying to write it. I heard that was a bug and that it's, they're gonna fix it in the next day.

Oh, is that why I keep typing dots instead of spaces? Yeah, I imagine, I can't imagine how many, like, if anyone at Google is monitoring searches, as soon as the iPhone 6 Plus went out, I reckon Google, like, why does every search have dots? The thing is, I did a couple days ago on Reddit, I saw saw a thread that was like you know the next software updates gonna fix this Promptory Google searches don't look like this and had dots in between the word I was like what the fuck do they mean my my searches don't look like that now I finally understand what they were talking about

Yeah, it's because I guess when I type I use my right thumb on the very edge of the space bar And when you're in safari doing it you always hit the period on the very edge of the space bar and when you're in Safari doing it you always hit a period every time. I don't see it, no one's showing me. Just try to talk to me in the sign language. Barbara's like, she's like getting tactical. Where are you just sitting here smiling at me? I'm like, show me.

You can look it up there. So I want to address something. Everyone is asked on Twitter. I'm like, this is right there. I'll come and be able to ask. Why is everyone's microphone on the left and mine is on the right? It's because I'm talking to the right. Barbers is actually on the wrong side.

Oh, well, I talk to you more than them. Okay, let's get to see. Now, we're gonna... We realize that sound does this from your mouth. I like, I could, I could look at Gavin, and still talk. On this side, because I'm talking in that direction. And my voice is going that away.

Do you think if you miked your eye, go ahead, would it pick up your mouth? Why not? try it? Let's talk like this for the rest of the pocket Hear me out. Yeah, it's very faint. Okay, you do look like a pirate though when you do that a pirate with a microphone over my eye Well, you know what a pirate is Do you know why the pirates were like where I patches? Yes, because they would switch it to the other eye when they would go underneath The deck so they could see better in the dark I never heard that fact until like two years ago. I think someone just made that. I'm convinced that's horse. I think so too.

Horse is shite. Like something. I think it's so bloody and a party. I have faith in humanity. Came up with that and it's brilliant but I get this feeling that that's not actually. It's like the whole you eat seven spiders in a year when you were asleep. Exactly right. And we all believe it. I mean regular jobs have people who go from bright environments to dark environments. Why doesn't everyone wear an eye patch? Yeah, but those people aren't like fighting with swords and like

Treasure I don't have a fight and the underneath of the ship I don't know or they might have to go down to come back up with a gun or something Being a pirate was hard. I don't want to discount like two seconds and then come out Yeah, but if you're in the middle of a fight, the same with your life. I like to think you're a pirate in your previous life, Gus. No. Being a pirate was hard.

No. You never go that booty. Pirates is like a really weird thing. I feel like we have this romanticized notion of them. But it's like in reality, like at the time, if you saw a pirate, you'd be like, ah, fuck, I'm about to die in a horrible way. Yeah, you're going to get a slip open.

Yeah. Unless it was Johnny Depp. Yeah, unless you were like, ah, fuck, I'm about to die in a horrible way. Yeah, you're going to get a slow open. Yeah. Unless it was Johnny Depp. Yeah, unless you're Captain Jack Sparrow. Or whatever is it most? There are some few moments in movies where you think that was badass. And one of those moments is in Pirates of the Caribbean for me when he just steps off the ship right before it sinks so casually. It's just like, that was really cool.

If I was a girl, I'd be like, shh. They did some really cool visual effects, things like the sword fight on the giant wheel. That's the only thing I remember from the entire series. What's the three people? Drink, spring them on, Mario. Hey, here we go. I'm gonna read this thing here.

Hold on one second. The good thing about being in a bar is there are drinks. Mario. Yeah, you go ahead and read that. Okay, I'm gonna read this. I want to remind everyone that this episode of the podcast is brought to you by me undies. 90% that's the percent of your life that you're in your underwear and underwear gets old fast.

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rooster teeth. I'm wearing them right now. They were a sponsor, I got, you know, they sent a box with like a couple free. I cannot wear normal underwear anymore. I bought all meandys on the one hand. What percentage of your life is in a life? They say 90%, I think it's higher than 90% mine's way higher

I'm minds like 99.9% in my underwear that you're wearing underwear. Yes I go for you have this discussion. Yeah, because you wear it when you sleep. I was trying to talk in my mind I'm a professional I we have a mute button on the side of our chair If we need to cough or or say something really offensive, I don't think it works to cough or say something really offensive. I don't think my words. That is awful. That is awful. That's sorry to everybody who had to hear that.

So I want to introduce someone. We have a special guest here. Yeah, Bernie. Nice to meet you. To your left, asshole, look at me. Hi, nice to meet you. Sally LaPage. We talked to her that we did an interview upstairs here at the same venue. And I found out during the interview that Sally's a PhD candidate at Oxford University. So I thought, I thought, anybody in like a five mile radius, I thought, I feel like we shouldn't be sitting here anymore.

What a great opportunity to have someone come and tell us how stupid we are. I would now be such a horrible thing. Bad science on this podcast. This is like a math equation here represented like if you add it up all our smartness this way would it equal her? Well, smartness Or would you think it would come close? Great, you hear that. So I made a journal on the original website.

I think we multiply ours. And I asked everyone to submit their greatest podcast stories about bad science. Oh god, I'm sure they can barely come up with anything. How hard is it to get into Oxford? Oh, you can't see it but this thing's slow. Well, obviously not that hard if I got it I don't know This is just come bring it on. Well, I mean it's tough. It's one. I mean, I would say it's the top university in the UK Yeah, because when I was applying for university, why didn't think about Oxford even though I lived there, but it was You know, it's like British people

You know, it's like British people Oh my goodness We're attacking from Obviously familiar with Oxford is being a very prestigious university, but I don't know if Oxford even has a mascot It doesn't know how to pronounce Oxford It's Oxford, not Oxford You have to say whatever you just said there So what do you think Oxford, mascot is?

But Oxford, a dictionary No, it would be It's an old university So what do you think Oxford's mascot is? That Oxford? Oxford, Mast, Duh. A dictionary. No, it would be... It's an old university. Is it the oldest university? Well, this is the oldest English-speaking university, as far as I know. I know. It's definitely the oldest in the UK.

Okay, it's a tree. The Oxford tree? Yes. I'm going to say it's like one of those things that they use to build stone heads. It's like what a big tablet. An alien? Oh, oh, oh, oh. Just sitting out in a field.

What is Oxford's mascot? It's really disappointing. We're too old to have a mascot. Is that true? We don't have a mascot at all. That's why I thought it was a dream. I thought, what would they have, like, a thousand years ago? Because it would bring in probably any organized sports.

The mascot should be a dude inventing mascots. I mean, we have a Latin motto, and we organized sports the mascot should be a dude inventing mascots I mean we have a Latin motto and we have a crest of like a shield about a crest thing logo is there is there anything on the crest that's yeah so it's a book and the book says the motto which is Domna Illuminati a mayo I think which is mayo in like me in lighten me don't be of me. Something like that, yeah. Okay. Fancy. Fair play.

Yeah. Their mascot is a Latin phrase. Is a book with a Latin phrase? Does Oxford at this point have any organized sports? Does it have organized sports? Yeah, like you have like a football team. Yes. We have every possible team.

You can rock me club it on it. So they're just the opposite of us. Yeah, Bernie does. Oxford is a very large university. What do you all chant? Like books. Books. That's the only way. So it's like, who do you play for? I play for the Oxford. Like guys like me. So it's the university. So there's the Oxford Cambridge

Roadways because I'm guessing even if you haven't really heard much of Oxford, you know the Oxford and Cambridge are big rivals. Right. And so we have the boat race. so rowing is the biggest sport, like far in a way. So you have basketball and ice hockey, I think, would be your equivalent here. And it's the only collegiate level sport that people watch is the Oxford Cambridge boat race. I remember getting drunk, a Henley Regretta, a few times. You should pronounce it right. I remember Jack, a Henley Regretta.

I remember. So, you know, the Ivy League school is an America basically all like to pretend that they're Oxford. So, that's actually rowing is huge and our Ivy League school is like, crew, right? I mean, is that they call it crew? Yeah, you can. You're in a great, right? And cocaine, right? It's big, Ivy League.

Is that big in Oxford? Sure, false. Let us know. So, what's the Coke levels like, Oxford? I don't know. You do learn to expect them to do this for me. I was, I didn't know what to say. But explain to me this one? I didn't know. I've never known for Coke at Oxford, although I have been told that because there are people

that study it. Study cocaine? Yes. And the chemical properties, depending on what source you get it from. Do they like test it themselves? Well, this is the thing. Well, they say that they say, say, a cowly road, which is kind of the more urban. Yeah, you know, you know, a cowly road.

No one else will, apologies. But yeah, so that's the place if you want to get your cocaine, that's the place. Wow, it's a great to know. So I want to comment on something real fast. Before we start, you're going to be a PhD candidate in Oxford. Now you know where to get your cocaine. You get a degree in cocaine. I could. I mean, I already did. Before we started the podcast, I was sitting down here talking with Sally, and I was like, you know, is there any like type of language restriction on the podcast? Is there any out-of-bound topics that said, listen, you can say whatever you want. It's like it's up to you. Whatever you feel comfortable saying,

you're more than welcome to say it. And here we are now talking about cocaine and oxygen. We actually do have a general rule at the company, which is you can say whatever you want to on camera, but everyone also has the right to kind of veto if they've said anything that's off-color or anything like that. Yeah, maybe that joke was not so good. This would be the one exception of that because it's just live streams. So anything you say is straight out to the internet. Oh, I'm wondering. There's a way to make me feel at home. I'm really like. Nice and easy. So PhD candidate in what field of study?

So I did evolutionary biology and I studied sex, which is why I needed to check what I could say. Why don't we talk about that instead of the cocaine stuff? My favorite topic. Yeah but like evolutionary sex is a good thing. So I study the evolution of sexual behaviors rather than sex itself. So I only in flies, I always forget that it's not in humans, it's in fruit flies. Just awful it. Just awful it. Yeah. It's in fruit flies The sufferlice sex in sex in sex in sex and I Watch flies having sex and I bring to get the two big areas of evolution of biology There's the social evolution which is how you're nice to your relatives So yeah, right. I have I have filmed the sufferlice shagging

Yeah, yeah, we're the macro lens. They're like this and like I watch one get born from a gross little egg thing Yeah, it's great. Yeah, well, so I do that in my head I'm not trying to quiz you here, but I'm actually genuinely curious. Yeah, how many species besides humans have sex for reasons other than appropriation Like recreational I don't know and but no bows for example there are closest cars and they're a type of chimpanzee Uh-huh, they're entire social structure is based on sex really and so they shag to say hello They shag to sort out the hierarchy. I just realized shag isn't a common US

We got it. We have a We have a They used to be used to it. Okay. He very rarely talk about shagging though. Don't but nob is also trade food Yes, so We have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Gavin, we have Get some on me in my diet. I'll give you the sandwich for a PJ What about oral sex that's a question oral sex. Oh, yeah, very specific to homo sapiens Homo sapiens. We're trying to class it up. Well, everyone's talking about species here Everyone's seen that video of the starter. It's gonna head this way soon. You'll see that's that video of the monkey You said monkey frog Yeah, the monkey who gops himself off of the frog Yeah, I don't think that counts as oral sex though.

What does it count as? It's certainly not consensual. Right, certainly not. Yeah, but what is consensual in the animal kingdom? What's it? Well, they're like really do. It's a really big question. Humans invented consensual, right?

That's true. I think animal... No, actually this is the point. So I give a talk on sex in the animal world. And this is the point that I make is that... I mean, so there are examples in the penguins. So, you know, the penguins in the John Lewis adverts. They actually are, especially as a penguin called the Daily penguins, that have been reported to have rape and necrophilia, and their sexual behavior has been studied loads about a hundred

years ago by this guy that was doing some expedition in the Antarctic. Has anybody like gone back and checked his work? This is the thing. His work was only published two years ago because it was too saucy to be published. And he thought it was so bad the things that he'd done that he'd written over some of his observations of these penguins and coded it into Greek alphabet just so that it couldn't fall into the wrong hand. Oh my god. It'd be a fence, a fence of money, that's what it was. and coded it into Greek alphabet just so that it couldn't fall into the wrong hand. Maybe a fence of money. Yes, so he had five papers on penguins, the last of which was like penguin sexual behaviors.

And that last one was the one that was not supposed to be. The penguins are at the table. That's the Benedict Cumberbatch for the two of you. Yeah, penguins. Penguins. But I mean, that's kind of screwed up that you observe something, you know, from a scientific perspective. And you think it's too risky for the time, and you can't report on it. Yeah, so I mean-

I immediately call his judgment into question though, if he's like writing down Penguin Necrophilia. Well, this is what happened, so this was happening in the 20s. But then if you take it back even further, so Charles Darwin also studied a lot of sex, because I mean, sex is really important in biology because you got the whole surviving and reproducing, but his daughter and his wife were the ones that were proofreading his manuscripts. And so we think that one of the reasons why he doesn't actually go too much into the knowledge of sex, he almost certainly would have had the amount he was studying in these

animals, for example barnacles and worms worms he famously studied for years and years I think Earthworms he studied for seven years and so he would have known about their sex habits but he didn't write about them and we think it was because that would have been there. Yeah, it's a bit too foolish. It's why it's like Charles come on earthworms are horneous fuck. Wait how does a barnacle show? Barnacles have the largest

penis right to the body size of any really was it like bigger than their body yeah many so if you think about it if you're stuck on a rock and there are no people around you go out there right you can get it out it's have a flipping long penis and so they have the longest penis relative to body size of any animal Well, that means the second to guess Yeah, yeah, yeah The second being like another barnacle in a rock and you just get tickled by this thing it's like Ah, it's just some other barnacles called They're like, oh, there's a fly on me. Oh, fuck

But I think I think I'm you know, I have to check this But I think if we scaled it up so that if you had a penis larger than a barnacle it would be about 24 foot long 24 foot long I'm like, I'm 25 Your cook could get booze Looks like it makes a lot of people you talk about like so, you know one of their barnacles hitting you with a penis But even more insulting with like I could have sex with Gus across you like that Okay guys

Overall our drinks People have sex across you. They're just like, you're not, I'm gonna go for this person over here. It's like the ultimate bad roommate. You say that doesn't happen that hasn't happened before. So your roommate's your neighbor. Yeah.

Like you think your neighbors are a lot of having sex, imagine if you're like your two neighbors on opposite sides of your apartment or having sex across your apartment. You just see the windows and there's like a dick going across the windows from the other side. The minute your Gus is apartment of like spot but it does make me wonder like you hear about stuff like ISIS They just went through and I'm not exactly sure what they destroyed But they destroyed like some kind of iconography or some religious artifact that was

You know thousands of year old years old but didn't agree with their current modern-day theology So they go through and destroy the stuff for all of time. They just like crush it, it's gone. And it makes you wonder too, like, you know, how many people throughout history, scientists, or whomever, made discoveries, then passed away, and the people who went through their archives, then for the benefit of that person just removed

what they considered to be sensitive material, and then we lost that research of a non-elective history. Yeah, I mean everything is edited essentially, you know, I mean we have an edited view of history but it makes me wonder if we've lost discoveries. Well I mean you've got the question of Fermat's last theorem which was a really famous mathematical proof. I can't remember what it was exactly, the he was- Next cube plus y cube equals z cube.

There we go. Um, no, see that? See that? You got that. Um, and, no, no. See that? See that? You got that. Um, and so... I went to Math Camp. For Matt, who was this mathematician, was reading and he wrote in the margin of his work, I said, oh yeah, I've sold this, but it's just a little bit too long to write in the margin, but I've done it.

I think what he wrote was, I've discovered an elegant proof to this equation. Uh, but it's like, which is too long for this margin. Right, but it's not as which is too long for this magic. Right, pretty much for this magic, yeah. And then dies. Wow, I'll get you it later. And nobody for a good 50, 60 years, everyone is trying. And I mean, they put money up for this.

I think you could win millions of pounds if you could prove what Firmat was trying to prove at the end. And only eventually have they proved it. And they think that Firmat didn't have the proof after all when he got the match wrong. That's fantastic. And I think the proof that even that they developed was not, you know, elegant. It was a multi-paid really long way. Which is why they think that he got the mat wrong.

Yeah. Okay, so maybe we should get to our list of questions that were provided by the audience of things that we've gotten horrifically wrong on the podcast. Have you been, have you been warned about how terrible we are at science? I, well I've been shown the list of things which gives me a little bit of an indication. I want to say they're really interesting questions actually and bringing it back to Oxford. They kind of remind me of Oxford interviews. Well here's what happens with our science. It's like four idiots. Well I'll be idiot prime.

And then it just bounces between two like four idiots and then into a snowball of idiocy. And that's how we can't get these questions out of it. I can't say out of it and just let it go between these three mostly Okay, but it all stems from this one Okay, well today you can take charge. Yes, we're gonna involve everybody Okay, science. All right, so I've got a list here like I said I'm in a journal on the RISP website I know I asked people to submit their Their favorite bad science moments from the podcast Give got a list and we're gonna talk about them here.

So the first one- Very sciencey. You look good, Barbara. I wanted to feel smarter for the section of the podcast. Don't worry about bringing it to us. The first one was my stupid. I feel like this is the stupidest I've ever been on the podcast. Cannon Airplane takeoff on a slippery runway.

A.K.A. could an airplane takeoff if it was on a treadmill and not actually moving forward. And what did you say at the time? At the time I said no. It would be impossible. He said that an airplane couldn't take off without wheels. Right. Because it needs the wheels spinning to take off.

Yeah, that's exactly what he said. Right. But really, right, it's just the thrust from the jets. It could slide along ice and take off, right? So, what is it? Could a jet take off on a treadmill? So, if you've got an airplane on a treadmill and this means that the airplane is being pushed backwards but it is rolling itself forward and is staying in the same place.

Basically, it's equivalent, I'm not a physicist by the way, but it's equivalent to just having the wheels moving and None of the air around the airplane moving having a massive airplane and just some tiny wheels moving Isn't gonna lift a massive air I have a question. Do you want to question if the we should forever something very important to Sally just said you're not a physicist A lot of these are physics I haven't even done a full physics GCSE. I did dual sciences.

We do more biology, very, very much biology, but I can give you a good stash. But you're probably way smarter than all four. Yes, yes, yes. It makes you feel any better. We're also really horrible at sex. So you can answer some of those questions. So does that count to any speed?

Like say the treadmill was 20,000 miles an hour. And somehow the plane is also going All that's happening is the lack of air If you change your perspective on it, if you look at the plane as stationary, there are no forces acting on it other than the wheel spinning around Because the air isn't moving around it And if the air doesn't move over the wings, there's no change in pressure The thing the way that an airplane lifts is that you have air flowing underneath the wings and the shape means that you get thrust.

So if there was a massive fan and the plane was still could then take off without going anywhere. If you had an absolutely massive fan that was angled in the right way then I suppose probably yes. Yes. But then you effectively just blow an object into the air. Right. It's like if I send a massive blast wave, an object will it move?

Yes. So you have to have like a 200 mile an hour blast. Blast of wind at this fan. Chars is our it might move. Yeah. The most important thing I got from that conversation is massive thrust. I was going to ask the dumbest question ever, which is if you took a, then took a massive

fan and attached it to the front of the plane and blew on the plane, could the plane take off and fly. But that's basically what it's supposed to be. It's basically what it's supposed to be. I don't think the fan would like that very much personally. What? Hey, it's being an enormous fan. Can I also say you keep on saying the dumbest questions?

Are these just questions? Like that's how science works. Don't try to make us feel better. This is not going to work. Really. OK, well, let me ask you a really dumb question. A really interesting question. This is a really, really, really nice

teacher in elementary school. So we had a conversation. Gavin here, who's our medical expert, said, if you were feeling sick or like, let's say you're feeling nauseous, that you could tell yourself in your mind, just stop. Just don't. Just don't. Yeah. Is that possible? Yes. It is. Is it really? Are you kidding? So, well this is a thing, so I was thinking about this. I'm no medical. I'm just gonna put a disclaimer.

I don't actually measure the odds of doing these questions. I can give it a good go. So, there are people that can self hypnotize. And these people can self hypnotize to the extent that they can have surgery. There are YouTube videos, I think if people have their wisdom teeth pulled out of having open chest surgery. I watched a video, stunned to hypnosis. Ever woman, she had to keep like a little ball of spit on her tongue and she just had to concentrate on that. And then we're like clacking the back of her leg open like moving veins around and stuff and she was just like completely conscious not and her leg was open and they were just hacking into it

not like in every way. Oh my god. Yeah. Coralary or a secondary follow up question of this. If you're dying of starvation. Let's say you're in the desert. Yeah. You're in the middle of the harrow desert. You're so specific. You're dying of starvation. Yeah, the outside desert won't do. It has to be so hard. 10 feet in front of you, you see a sandwich. Can you live long enough knowing that there's a sandwich just barely?

If you live just a little longer, you could grab the sandwich. This originated from like whenever someone stops the death in the desert. Yeah. They end up somewhere. Like the guy died here. But my thinking was, if he was here and saw a sandwich here, would he have kept on living just further enough to

get the sandwich or would he have still died right there? I think so. Yes and no. So there are things where it's amazing what the brain can do, and they do say that if you kind of give people incentives to live then you can kind of push that a little bit further and there are things where if you play music to people for example that really changes things so when people are in comas and they think oh no all is lost and they play the music and then suddenly you see brain waves and if you have people that have degenerate diseases so maybe Alzheimer's for example if you treat them as if they don't have it then to some extent the brain kind of compensates and they show fewer symptoms.

Really? It's things like brain training. This is starting to scare me. I'm starting to think I have something to do with this act of rhythm. So the brain is incredible. Whether it can go to the extent of salvation I don't know, but I mean the brain can do some really crazy things because you think of the placebo effect. Like the placebo effect is that people think the homie-opathy is amazing because it does

have an effect, it's just the effect is no better than a placebo, but the placebo is still your brain changing how you feel and that's pretty powerful thing so in a sense maybe I don't know so for homeopathic medicines a lot of times they are very clear to state that these things don't do anything like there's a study and the government will say I think the Australian board of medicine just recently said homeopathic remedies don't do anything but isn't almost it a way a little bit irresponsible to do that because you're robbing people of a very real potentially placebo effect I'm fairly certain that there are studies that show that even if you tell people

It's a placebo effect. They still feel the placebo effect. I think I don't know if it's the same strength But I'm fairly certain that you do still get it so I can take Procebo things and still get the same effect. I wonder if someone could could Could you know in a way instigate that like you're educated about the placebo effect if someone a doctor a trained professional You would trust said here's like a here's a sugar pill This has a placebo effect that will cure your indigestion and then you take it even if you just like made that up on the spot If you get it like induce a placebo effect for some This is a big so we got first in the lab coat effect

Which is that we're more likely to believe people in lab coats so that if a person in a lab coat gives it to you The placebo effect will be stronger. Really? Another thing about the placebo effect that's really cool is two pills work better than one, even if they're sugar pills. An injection, a saline injection works better than a pill. So, sham surgery works.

So, the more invasive and the more horrible you think it is, the more benefit you think you're gonna get. I'm gonna show you a lab coat. I never thought about this. So, then, when people do like placebo studies, it's not just a pill every time. There's also injections, they're like a whole wide array. There's a whole thing, yeah.

And you've got things like blue pills work better when you need to calm someone down and red pills work better when you need to through someone up. What about if the pills are given to you by Lawrence Fishberg? I was going to make that fucking joke. But the matrix.

Oh, yeah. Then through the entryality. I've got to say, I don't But the Matrix. Oh! Yeah. Uh, then... I'm going to say, I'm going to remember which one was which. As somebody who has a lab coat a lot, I feel happy with this. I don't think I even believe it. I was going to say, I need to start wearing a lab coat now from now on no matter what. Wear a lab coat on the pot. You know it's true though. When you wear the lab coat on slomo guys, people are always marveling about how intelligent

you are on slomomo guys versus every other moment of your life when they don't want to. Why are you saying this? While you were saying this, I was thinking I should also be wearing a monocle. Like, what the hell is that? Because then you have a lab coat and English accent and a monocle. It's the right vector. It's the right vector.

That's all you need. Okay, I'm going to work my way down the list. You got it. Next to you. Okay, so this going to work my way down the list. You got it. Next time. Okay, so this one requires a little bit of setup. The basic question is, what is the speed of push? Oh, this is a really interesting question.

So you actually know the answer. So the setup is, if you had a pole that was one light year long and you pushed it on one end, how long does it take to push travel down the entire length of the pole to get to the other end? Do you know why this is such an interesting question? Because I don't know the answer. There's nobody has a one-light year-long pole. Not even a barn, you don't know.

You don't need a wig. Well the thought is, is that nothing can travel fast on the speed of light. Okay? And that includes information. And it's really important that you know the universe has this speed limit on it which is the speed of light. And so the thought was, well if we have a pole that's one light year long and we pushed it and it instantaneously got pushed at the other end, that would mean the information was travelling instantaneously in the time it would take light in a space that would take light a year to do, which means the information would be travelling fast in the speed of light, which wouldn't be possible.

And so the reason that it's not is because actually what you're doing when you push is you're compressing the atoms in the material and sending a pressure wave all the way down the material. And pressure wave through a material is what sound is. So the pressure wave will only travel through the material at a speed of sound and that's why it will take you much much longer. Which compared to the speed of light is slow as hell. So does that mean, say I have this pole that's a light year long, right? I'm at one end like this, like ready to give it a right shove and you're the other end bent over and it's like right next to your anus. Let me hold the table so you don't drop that. Would you let me have my attention now? Would you let me shove it?

If I have a light ear to... You have more than a light ear because if it moves at the speed of sound. I mean, obviously it's not, nothing's gonna happen to you, but would you feel a light ear? Would you feel a light ear? Yeah, but get more than a year. Would you feel a light?

I'd probably have to speed a light. Oh yeah, I have more than a year. Yeah, you have like thousands of years. So my question is how, is there anywhere on earth where you could replicate that lag Like could you ever observe the lag on earth? Like if you had a pole that was like a thousand miles long Well, it seems to me that if I measured a pole right and then I pushed it into a picture of it The pole would be shorter in the photo

Because it's compressed it's some I Because it's compressed. It's compressed. I guess it's compressed on an atomic level. But it seems like that measurably, if that's true in a light year, then it's true. It's a constant. So it's true at this level as well. I think he has how this theory pulls apart. If you had a thousand mile long pole, you just couldn't push it. Could you?

Could just take so much effort. But not an Earth. Could you get a machine to push it? It would be a person. Yeah, you could like some science thing. You'd have to go to some science thing, guys. You'd have to go to space, because you couldn't, I mean, 1,000 miles would curve here.

Why me? Even in space, you would shove it, and you would end up like going that way, wouldn't you? Because you're going to be way heavier than you. But no, you just like put your back up against the moon. That's how you do it in space, dude. That's how you do it in space, dude. Just find a moon, put your back up against the moon. That's how you do it in space, dude. That's how you do it in space, dude. Just find a moon, put your back up against it.

I'm patient with you. You're like swimming thing. Like, we see you around in space. That works, right? Okay, I just have a couple more. So I'm going to get to it. By the way, of all of our death scenarios we've come up with, I would hate more. We talked about being stranded in the middle of the Pacific Ocean recently.

Being trapped in a space suit, flipping through space, that would be the worst way to die. And just waiting for your airwrestling. You're just shouting gravity, right? Well, if you're flipping too fast, the blood will drain from your face. Where we go. Up. If you flip them like this, right? Yeah.

It depends on your area of view. Yeah. But either way, you'll probably black out. Yeah, let's hope so, right? I mean, because then you're in a situation where you can't actually do anything you can't even kill yourself not to be more of it i want to see it's have some kind of like suicide they built into the

well i thought that was a was actually never seen the movie contact with jerry fosh can't pronounce anything foster uh... they have a great moment of the where she's gonna go into this like experimental like rift making machine that's it never say the movie but basically makes a wormhole. And at the last moment, they give her a pill. And they say something that's, like, so profound, but, like, so frightening at the same time.

They say, you know, you could get trapped, you could be without air. This will kill you instantly without pain. It's for a lot of reasons, but mainly it's for all the reasons that we can't think of. That's why you need to bring this pill with you. And it's, like like such a frightening thing. It's like when scientists are doing things and they're pushing the envelope, they're going into environments where they just don't know.

What is the state of push of an envelope? It's so good. But it's like so crazy to think about that. You have to acknowledge the limits of where we are in our knowledge and just realize that we just don't know. You know what I mean? We could, when they broke the sound barrier, they just, they didn't really know what would happen, you know what I mean?

And the fun was impossible. Right. And it was like, if it happens, we don't know what's gonna happen. Right, I mean, we deal with that with the, the, the, the hazard on collider, where it's like, there's a lot of people going, you don't, you just gonna make a micro black hole and like suck everything in, and, you know, and, but we don't know. Well, that's why we're doing it, just to figure out what it will do.

Well, we know that it won't close the black hole. What doesn't make micro ones and they just don't know. That's why we're doing it just to figure out what it will do Well, we know that it went close to black hole What doesn't make micro ones and they just don't have the Gravity no not at all So how did that start like how does that the daily male? Good answer for play. All right, so Question fundamental question How many senses do people have oh shit? I don't want to be involved in this conversation. I was in first of all, this conversation has been skewed as to what I was saying.

I said that there's five senses one time, I said well the five human senses. Okay. Gavin corrected me. Yeah. And he said, you're absolutely wrong, there's more than five senses. And I said how many are there? He goes, well there's way more than five. And I said, first of all, a sense is an arbitrary distinction calling something a sense. It's not like there's way more than five and I said first of all a sense is an arbitrary distinction calling something a sense it's not like there's a classification yeah but surely a sense is well I see information some way and you learn about

so how your surroundings we said there's a sense of gravity right that was one of your classifications well I you can sense which way up you are but nobody can say how many senses there are even though they tell me that I'm wrong And there's when I say there's five everyone else has no you're absolutely wrong And it's about how many other than go don't know but more than five. It's like if it's a solid answer and this distinction If something is applied or something then you would know when you've run out of Sentence like how many colors are there? No, no more than five. Well, how many other? I think I do No, no more than five. Well, how many are there? I'm not saying there's five of them. You make a valid point.

I think I do. Yeah, that was pretty good. No, but if like, listen, I mean, seriously, if you ask me, I'm trying to count my head here, but if I said there's seven colors, and you said, no, there's way more than that, you would essentially be right because you can have this refinement of colors, but guess what?

There's really only seven colors. Only three. There's only three. Right? Right. Even that you could even say there's just three. I have a question. I have a question. Go ahead. What are you on about? Do you want to give me context? That's like you can have everything. It's the real climate that's arbitrary. I'm sorry. I'm taking away from time. All right. I always get up and this comes up. So it's been a long time. I've been in debate. debate up. So, it's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate.

It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate.

It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate.

It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a very long time debate. It's been a big idiot. I didn't want to offend our guests. So for example, we got a text from a mad dog friend me. So we have proprioception, which is if you shut your eyes, you know where your arms are in relation to the rest of your body. And I was explaining stuff like this, like a like temperature and all of the stuff. He was just saying that's feel and it's the same thing.

It's a refinement of the sense of touch. Yeah, that was it. No. OK. So let me ask you this question. How many senses are there? More than five. All right.

There's a lot of good words. I'm with you. You and me. Right. But I mean, there's a thing. I mean, there are difficulties in how you classify things. And as humans, we do like to put things into little boxes. And as a biologist, you get into all kind of stuff with that.

So someone's so easy evolution. We were like, oh, what's a species? It's like, you're literally trying to take something that we have shown to be on a continuum and say, where does it start? Where does it stop? You're always going to have problems. And with senses, I mean, you could say that sound is a special type of touch because actually it's how the pressure interacts with the silly at your ears. And ears and so in that sense it's very difficult to make the distinction between what is this type of sense and what is this type of sense but by most people's

definition of interpreting the world and taking in stimuli we have more than five Fair enough well what you're saying I totally agree with the thing that I reject is the fact people tell me that I'm wrong about that because that's the refinement that I choose to use right I want you to be on every single podcast that we ever do from this point Only because she's proving you I want you to be yours at a hymn Okay, so let's say we're here on earth and let's say Let's say we're here on Earth and let's say

One light year away in space a mirror magically appeared. Oh, I love this question If we look at it how did you get on to this question if you're looking at please this mirror from a telescope on Earth Because we have to stop for an hour and a half one year in the past Do you see in the past what you see in the past at all? If you see in the past, do you see one year in the past? Or do you see two years in the past? Since it's one, two. I like this question. Could you look into the past?

Two. OK. It's like when you're looking at a mirror and you're doing your makeup, and you've got to sound really, really close. Because what you're seeing looks, what you're seeing looks to you twice as far away, because you've got you then the distance to the mirror and what you're focusing on is the distance again the other side,

which is why you have actually kind of stand much closer to get it, so you can actually see it and focus on it. I like that experience. Also, whenever you take a picture of yourself in the mirror, your phone is always the same size to you. Wait, what is it? What? No!

No. Okay, so if you wave your phone in front of the mirror, it magically changes size. If the mirror magically appeared in space, you would have to wait. We would have to wait a year before we could see it because of the gesture. Because imagine if you sent a laser, a laser beam or a photo on a particle of light, just like that. You can imagine it taking a year to get to the mirror. You're not going to see it then. It has to bounce back to the information to come back to you. So could you see in the past?

So why don't we do this? Why don't we use surveillance of the past? Why don't we have this in place? Ready to go. We're trying to called YouTube where you have cameras and then stick it on the internet and you can watch things back from the past. Yeah, the way nobody was filming it. It was really it. We'll just look in the mirror, I see what happened then. But then I'll look in the mirror in June and we'll see what happened like two years ago in June.

You will have to have an infinite series of mirrors, an infinite distance away to be able to, and you don't even have to start from now. But I mean we see in the past when we look at stars. We would have to have mirrors at each time point that we wanted to see. But we could set that up. The NSA could take their giant telescope and be like, we need to see what happened at this date and turn to a specific mirror. The NSA has a telescope? The NSA is fucking, I mean, the NSA is great. What if you don't have a mirror?

Because satellite, maybe. What if you just have like a mirrored sphere? Where I have tons of there. It's sponsored this podcast. Shout out to the NSA. But also you. I want to hear the mirrored sphere. I actually, I actually, she brought up a point that really kind of blew my mind there, which is,

if I take my camera and I turn on the front face and camera, that's a shorter distance. Like I'm looking at that flat on the front facing camera. That's a shorter distance. I'm looking at that flat on the screen, the image of myself. My girlfriend uses hers to look at her eyes and everything for I make up and stuff. That kind of blew my mind. I never thought of a mirror as being three-dimensional. This is not three-dimensional. There's depth to it. I never thought about that. There's a really interesting video on YouTube by Physics Girl, which is that

Miri's awesome. She's awesome. Flicked things as well. Well, like you've only ever seen yourself in a mirror, but other people see you different. A different side, yeah. Yeah, we, uh, I feel that Abraham Lincoln thing, right? I filmed a video with my wife the other day. We did a, like, a little gameplay video. So, like, gameplay.

Tell us about it. Where was I? I think it back in your field of study here. And, uh, we were, she was looking at the monitor of us as we were sitting there playing a video game and she said, you know, it looks weird, something's wrong and I said, well, this is, you know, a video image.

This is you. And what you actually look like. Yeah, it's like this is what you look like. You're not looking at yourself in a mirror and it was like that whole like, oh yeah, wow, that's really weird to see yourself that way. Especially someone who's got a side-french. Like, I only got that down recently.

It always surprises me that it goes the other way. Yeah. I feel yeah. It's so shocking. Then it's like, should I start piring at the other way? That's what I think it is. You guys start. What do you think about when your cop goes one way?

I don't think about it very often. In the mirror, I'm always shocked. I'm like, what? Hang in love? Where is it? How do they have it? I mean, man. All right like what hanging left? Where is it? How do that happen? All right, last one. All right, we got it. We're gonna end with a big one Which is better? Celsius or Fahrenheit?

A.K.A. is a metric or Imperial? No, no wait, let's all right. Go ahead. You can ask the question without any kind of eyes. Kelvin. As a Brit, Celsius as a scientist, Kelvin. Fahrenheit, no way to be seen. I've been talking about barbecues and robots and stuff and these videos I've been making in America G. And they've been talking me at things of me in Fahrenheit.

I don't even have a perception of what things are in it. Well, this is a big, god, here's a sense. I was a big, Celsius believer, until I heard Bernie's explanation why Bernie kind of pays for Fahrenheit. What was your case again? May I present my case for Fahrenheit? Keep asking.

I'm going to counter at yours immediately after you finish talking. Actually, before you say it, can I say what I think you're arguing with HiBee? What would it be? So the zero Fahrenheit is cold outside. 100 Fahrenheit is warm outside, and therefore, that's the most important temperatures for people.

No, more so. I mean, we agree that the scale of zero to 100 is something that we just lock onto as humans, right? That that's an important scale. So if you look at the Fahrenheit scale from zero to 100, it's these survivable temperatures of human beings. That if you get above 100 degrees, you're in trouble of dying. And if you're in an environment that's

below zero degrees Fahrenheit, you're in very great danger of dying. What happens if you go to Jumper? What's that? Well, how does if you go to Jumper or a swatter. Did you guys switch place? Yeah, I was like, what? And even like, you know, when I look at the useful scale of Celsius, it's very useful from zero degrees up to about like 45 and then there's pretty much nothing between 45 and 100. Yeah, but you could use these exact same argument for 212 is boiling in Fahrenheit, correct? Which I realized are between 100 and 212.

But we're focusing on the zero and 100. And so we don't use those very often. And there's more precision between zero and 100 than there is between 0 and 45. I'm just saying that for everyday people for using a temperature scale, they're going to use the degrees of Fahrenheit every day. I have a nest at home. Yeah, it's stuck in Fahrenheit because of mech. The difference between 74 degrees and 75 degrees. Ballots. Huge. huge huge huge difference You have a lot of

If you know it matters when you're Relationship my nest at home in the Summer of air connection set to 76 I'm so confused why do you have nest? A nest is a digital thermostat to brand We're not sure When I'm at the toilet, it could thermostat to brand. We're not doing that. We're not doing that. It can tell it to be your smartphone. It's our in the summer, our thermostat is set to 76.

If I move our thermostat to 77, my wife is interested in like, why is it so hot here? What happened? You know, she can tell that 76 to 77 difference. There is 76. That's my house. That's fucking hot. I'm so sorry. I don't want to spend money.

I can turn on my fucking electricity. Oh fucking hot. I'm so I don't want to spend any heat on my fucking electricity. Oh, well, I guess in the summertime maybe. Right, but in the in the in the winter I'll set it to like I don't know. I don't know. I said 70. Yeah, okay. And then if I set it to 69, I that's pretty cold. I had a saddest conversation the other day, which is Michael keeps Lindsey and Michael's apartment freezing cold. It is the coldest place in the universe. He's the sickest. He's the sickest. One time I had a bet with my wife.

One winter, we said, let's play Game of Chicken. Let's see how far in the winter we can get before one of us wants to turn the heater on. We got all the way to mid-January, freezing, multiple levels of like, push of, of, of comfortors. Why did you bet? Did you bet money? No, it was just like oh, I'm fine. Yes. Yeah, I don't I don't need the heater I like that it was a pretty really good fit environment But in the middle of winter. It's like 45 degrees in our house in the middle of that And I'm like, can we please just both your boat now? Well, all the houses here, man

I'm like losing by the way. Yeah, I lost I lost every house in Austin is made of like plywood you must see How's it actually made of wood? My house is made of wood So that's what you came at them like Like grass grass roofs Clouds that is very old. Do you lost teeth. Carve into the hills. Juke lost teeth.

Juke lost teeth. Juke lost hair. That's why it's going away. It's a great juke law movie though, I gotta say. Like we did a lot of stuff this week with Spy, the movie which is coming out and I got tickets to go see the premiere. Melissa McCarthy, maybe one of the funniest people on the planet. That movie was hilarious.

It's funny, it's nuts. Totally miss market. There's a Jason Statham movie there. It's totally Melissa McCarthy movie and it's it's fucking I watched fast and I watched Furious 7 and they would think I liked it. I mean it never dictates movie. How was the stuff like after Paul Walker died? Can you tell the difference? I could I saw it with Dan and Meg I Could definitely tell the shots that he was already dead for. Oh really? Yeah. Wow. Because they just shot the movie.

It's really interesting how the filmmaking was different. They had to keep shooting him from either really wide or he was in shadow. And there were a few shots where they had to CG his face. Because they used his brothers as doubles. They were CG pull-walkers face onto his brother. And to me it was way into the uncanny valley territory of just like it looks slightly off, but you don't know why. But it was impressive what they did. It's really like, it gets by. Paul Walker actually brings up a point that happened earlier this

shoot. Tell you have a YouTube channel as well. I do. You want to tell people what it is? Which counter do I look at so I can do the shameless plug. They go right there. Okay shameless plug. My YouTube channel is called Shad Science and you can find it at youtube.com for slash Shed Science and because I'm here with GE I should also say that I'm making videos on their channel Although I don't know the you are relevant It's serious. It's called fiction past all the we're gonna be several series on it though So if you like movies and robots and trains and stuff go to GE's channel Which they be the audience does well if you like sex and evolution and animals and behavior go to my channel so the shameless plug over

the first fiction fast forward I'm gonna continue okay first fiction fast forward episode is about robotic artificial intelligence yeah specifically with on the film chaffee yes and that comes out this week's okay it came out didn't it what days it today today is one day okay I've been doing so many interviews for this thing I've? What day is it today today is Monday? Okay, I've been doing so many interviews for this thing I've lost what day is it comes out tomorrow. Okay, I thought chap. You already came out the video the movie chap is already out But the video at the science behind chap is my what do you think is the biggest threat to humanity? other human wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait

Did Bernie's are giving about fair and high? Yeah, can I explain to you? Oh, yeah, sure. I'm sorry. We got to have it. That's a load of bulls. I mean, my mute button, young man.

I'm going to get my mute button ready to. Because saying that that's the survivable range for a human, well, humans can survive depending on what human you are, what mutations you have, effects, what temperatures you can survive at. And also, we're not exactly in the age when none of us have clothes or heating or air conditioning anymore. I think it takes time to remove that. But let me say, these temperature standards were not developed in the time when we had a lot of... I'm sorry, we didn't have the modern heating that we have now.

You do realize that clothing is the reason you can look at clothing to see when Sorry Gavin how cold is it rock? We can use when Pubic lights and head lights diverge to see when clothes You can man that is how old clothing is wow Because that's when we start to lose the hair on our bodies. So, we are head and our pubic. When it's hot in the summer, why don't we all get naked?

I mean, we can. It's legal here in Texas. Not all of us are barfers. Let's put that back. A woman could be toppled. Is any place a man could be toppled. As long as she's not quitting a disturbance. Really?

So, if she is going to hell with it. Yeah, as you can't have pasties on. I like how you, why would that be on like I like how you look in the morning Why would that be disturbance? I like how you immediately knew that like caveat because have you had this discussion before like Estors like look never anywhere and you're like nope don't create a disturb Did you have a week where you saw like two separate homeless tips? Oh, I saw a lot of homeless tits guys has a problem where a lot of most people will like either come on to him or accuse him Of attacking them.

Yeah, there was a woman who was regularly outside of our old office downtown and dust would walk out the door and she would scream, that's the guy that attacked me. No, no, no, no, no, no, what she said was she came up to me and was like, I remember you, you raped me once, violently. I was like, I don't know you woman, I've never seen you in my life. I can't see more of you. People on the street would stop and look and be like, what?

Guys, it's like this. Yeah. What's more worrying is that people saw that and didn't think to intervene. Well, I was dressed like an ordinary person and she was dressed like a crazy person. So that helped me out. Would anybody in the UK intervene in a situation like that? Oh no, got a mind. Don't make it fast.

So, honestly, yeah, can possibly. So, I've been making eye contact. Another time I was in the office, I was still sitting at my desk, and I picked up my phone, I called my wife. And I said, hey, I'm on my way home. I'm leaving the office. She said, oh, great conversation, that would be a wife. Yeah, and I want to talk to you about something.

So we started talking. I'm walking downstairs, I walk down stairs, walk out into the street, and another homeless woman gets right in front of me and it's like, she was really short. So she's like, kind of staring me in the face. And I put the phone to like, can I help you? And she said, you can't ignore me. Don't pretend like you're on the phone.

And I was like, I was on the phone before I walked out before I saw you. And she said, yeah, you can't ignore me. And she kicked me in the shins and took out running. I was like, what just happened? I just got assaulted. Nice. I never had to interrupt.

What is this happening? I don't know. And does he run out? I guess that's a very offensive face. Yeah, I can't imagine everyone in the UK ever like seeing a situation on the street in intervening to like stop that. I think I know what it is.

I think you have a look that says you may have been homeless once. At the time, that's when I had gone like a year and a half without a haircut. You're a contemporary. Like a colleague. Yeah. And I much the worst thing to homeless people is homeless people

who have become successful. Right? Right. They're sell outs. They're like, it's's like what happened to Billy? he got a home, he got a fucking sellout he's not less anymore he's staying on someone's couch, he wasn't committed

that is the closest I've come to spitting out a beer on the podcast I heard you giggle in my ears when Gavin came over from the UK one time we were in an elevator in a public parking garage and we went up five floors sorry let me translate that you're in a lift and a car for us exactly and we had to go up five floors six metric floors and we were in the elevator going up and there was somebody else in the elevator with us and Texas is it's a little different than the rest of America as well people you don't know will

just start talking to you so the person next to us I mean I did that in New York New York when I was back in there. I hate it. Yeah. It's not deal with it. It's really weird. Well, I quite like it. I just don't know whether I talk back or not. Like do they actually want to start a conversation? It was the worst experience of his life. They struck up a conversation and Gavin just scared straight ahead while I talked to them. And then the person got the other and Gameless, what was that? Yeah. Are you streaming? Are you used to it now? After living here for three years?

I mean, I'm used to it. I'm not comfortable with it. I know. Well, I mean, just yesterday. So I was coming back tonight with a friend. And this guy, I'm guessing homeless to follow on from the theme. Just started serenading me. It's so different.

There's a homeless guy who hangs out on Congress a lot and He's always had a bus stop, but he's not waiting for the bus. He just sits there and he's got giant headphones on Oh, that guy's going for the bus. No, and he's just like he just got this he just like But I don't want to have any homeless people there are that are just way happier than people in really high-paid jobs And I think it's a lot a homeless people don't care about about anything? Let me reach out as long as I can live. We'll pose these questions sometimes. Would you give up like your higher cognitive functions? No. If you could be happy, like blissfully happy every bliss.

No, I'm just talking like unbelievably blissfully happy. Would you remember your previous existence? What you were like before? Well, I see that you could give cognitive ability up, you don't. Like, you're higher stuff. Like, I'm saying, you know, you'd still be a functioning adult. I don't think I would.

You would just lose all your book. Oh, let's say, let's say, what if, like, all the horrible stuff's at least like depression and like, our ability to analyze or existance? Let's say this, what if I could clap my hands and you're a dog? What does that mean? You're super happy all the time.

Maybe he's going to look his own ass. Except if you need to go to the bathroom and know and sledding. But you don't remember anything else. Yeah, I would want to be at the level like a dog. I'm not talking that low of a level. Okay, okay. I'm talking just like, you know. Between a dog and a human.

Let's say like, wide range. What do you like? A-D-I-Q. Let's just say that for a range. Would you give that up if you could be blissfully happy all the time? You'll come down to Dany's IQ. IQ is an awful way of measuring. Alright, I'm just trying to come up with some kind of measurement here.

I don't think I would. I don't even know what I'm going to do. I'm going to read this other thing here. Let's pay the chips, they're not good for you. Do what I do, get delicious, hold some snacks, and naturopox.com. Naturopox gives me hundreds of snacks, I mean delicious snacks, and I don't feel guilty about eating them because they're better for me. They've got zero artificial flavors, colors of sweeteners, zero grams of trans fats,

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I don't have lenses, so they don't have reflections. But you still feel like you need the frames around you if I'm trying to seem I have I have I have I have I have I have I have I have the answer question. He's from Austin Everybody here is a hipster. I also had to shave because we did some reshoots for our movie laser team in theaters Hopefully you know trailer trailer out today trailer available. So I had to shave for it. I normally wear a beard. So without my glasses, or my beard. You wear a beard. I wear a beard, yeah. Without my glasses.

It's my shoes, my pants, and the small, and big ones. It usually matches like my pocket square, or something like that. But without my beard, or my glasses, I would be pretty much unrecognizable. You mean just a normal passing. So here's the problem that I have. I don't know if this is an evolutionary biology question.

I have a problem, and I don't know what this is an evolutionary biology question. I have a problem And I don't know what it is. I never look the same in two photos and even me as a person I recognize that and people always tell me that I don't look the same and I absolutely knowledge And this is the same as you're like infinite variables thing is like you can't physically look I don't actually there are only three looks that you have physically look identity actually there are only three looks that you have God, I'm everybody Perfect answer it's a joke no joke with the three colors of light keep up here bar

So okay, I'm my marino bonus question then I wasn't gonna ask this one people in the first laser team teaser People didn't know until today that I was in the movie what I had people tweeting at me saying oh, I didn't know that I was in the movie. What? I had people tweeting at me saying, oh, I didn't know that was you. In the film, it was me, Michael Cohen, and Seth Rogen Frank. But you're, I mean, your name was in every minute. No, but it's not everybody. But it's just a selection of people who are just like, oh, I didn't realize until the teaser today that you're the guy that was in the trailer. trailer.

That's the same. That's actually like a compliment, I think. No, I did a lot of work to not look like myself. Yeah. So follow up questions. But it's the same. That's actually like a compliment I think. No I did a lot of work to not look like myself. Yeah. So follow up questions. But it's question time. Wow. I wasn't going to ask this one.

Is this double or nothing? This is just all the marble. What do I win by the end? By the way, I'm going to get this. You win by the end. You win by the end. I'm going to win by the end. You win by the end.

I'm going to win by the end. I'm going to win by the end. I'm going to win by the end. I'm going to win by the end. I'm going to win by the end. I'm going to win by the end. I'm going to win by the end. I'm going to win by the end. I'm going to win by room with a tiger, he could beat the tiger up. Listen, you get it wrong again. All I'm saying is always something about self-suffering.

So this is bad size, just that you are woefully misunderstood. No, here's what I'm saying. I'm saying that if you put me, not I'm not saying animals are in the water, because I'm clearly out of the last thing. I'm saying that a tiger or a lion or something like that, that tiger or a lion would not kill me. Do you have anything like a knife or a hand? No, no, no, that's what I'm saying. I tiger or a lion or something like that, that tiger or lion would not kill me. Like, do you have anything like a knife or a hand? No, no, no, that's that what you said. I think it's bare hands.

You should not be able to find any animal in a lion in a way. A lion. Winning to me is not being eaten by the animal, killed or eaten by the animal. Do we agree with that? If I can get the... Okay. Also, I don't think you can do that.

Also, I never said locked in a room because I'm locked in a room. You did. You said lock me in a room. It locked me in this conference room right now with a tiger. Those were your words. Do you think you said lock me in a room it lock me in this Converture right now with a tiger those were your words You see that video the hippo chasing the boat you would be that's a mullish by the water animal I said no water. I said no water in it can war people was on land

No, I can get away from him online don't try. No. No. No, you could not get away from him on land do it all the time Have you seen that hip-hop video? Yeah, it is when it goes under the water it disappears. Yeah, that's Yeah, all these water animals I'm not I admit a shark would kill me a tiger tiger No I know We have a scientist telling us that you'd be dead You don't think you you as intelligent as you are that you would stand a chance of fighting a tiger Yeah, I caught him. Well, I his wife. I think we have a chance so but there are

Certain tribes is one tribe everything in Africa where they The way that they get their meat is they let the lions hunt the meat and then they go up towards the lions as a group of people and just kind of charge at it. The lions get scared, they steal some of the meat and run away, leaving some of it for the lions. But one of the things is there are lots of them and they're in a big open space. If you can imagine that you're locked in a room.

I'm not locking myself in a room for a small. You said that, it's in the animated adventure. If you are locked in a room with a big cat, even if you can scare it to begin with, it's gonna get hungrier. Right, it doesn't say locked in a room. It's a need to sleep. If I'm locked in a room, say I can get out of the room.

Have you seen Life of Pi? Yeah, I have seen Life of Pi. You are the Zebra in Life of Pi. Zebra, I've heard Zebra before are the zebra in life of pie. Even in Zebra before, I've never been zebra either. Yeah, I've never been Zed in life of Zebra. Do you feel better when you're Zebra? It's a joy to the ears. But even if it wasn't based on like endurance

and you're having to sleep, even if you just went like one V1 with a tiger right now, fight to the death, it would just go for your throat probably, right? And you would do this, it would rip your arms off and then eat your throat. Like what point you can do anything, you're gonna punch us. We even have examples of this.

The Romans fought lions. They had nets and spears and steal the lions at some point and kill the... Yeah, they could win. What was your strategy? Eyes in throat. I got it. It was just by real police. It was just by real police. I'm not sure what I'm gonna get hurt. What I said was a house cat will fuck you up to the point where you don't want to touch it anymore

House cat my fuck up a little bit, but it's not gonna get very far tiger is like a hundred times a house cat I get my kid in the bath it turned into the Tasmanian devil It came dust my toothbrush was flying around the room the club I'm not that the line tiger doesn't bother me a little bit. The thing that bothers me is like a silverback gorilla or a grizzly bear. Like the brand new. Those are both land animals. That's really tough.

That's really tough. Did you see that video a couple weeks ago on Reddit? Where these people are like in a Jeep driving, I think like a long a beach or a trailer or something? And there's this bear running alongside this giant bear. And it's hauling ass It must be doing like 35 miles an hour if I remember the video correctly It was stuck like they had carved a road through a mountain so there was like

Sheer rock wall on either side so the bear had to like run all the way down it Along the side of the road in order to get away. Yes, and they're matching pace with it in a vehicle Yeah, that bear is hauling ass down that trail. I never think the bear being a fast animal. Very fast. I never think about hauling ass. Yeah. The bear was hauling many asses.

It just has a bag of asses. It's hauling it. It's dragging it along. I don't know if it's because I'm sitting closer to her, but I feel like the purpose of this podcast was to prove me wrong the entire time. Why do I feel like that? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We're the most wrong.

We started with the airplane thing, which was my bad. Yeah, what we start with that. That was like Bernie, Bernie, Bernie. Did we prove me wrong at any point? Yeah, you're awful. No, no, no, no, we actually reinforced you. We talked about, if you're feeling sick, can you make yourself stop?

The mirrors. The sandwich, speed of push. You're gonna be able to make it in a very popular way. We're the audience, because they always get mad at this for a week when I get it It's gonna be three against two for Celsius versus fair. I saw many tweets that were like oh my god They actually have a scientist Talking about science on the podcast People have been begging us for a very long time to get someone who actually knows it

There should be an annual thing will come up with a bunch more in the next year do it South by Southwest So when do you finish your studies? To be an annual thing, we'll come up with a bunch more. Yeah. And the next year. Do it. South by Southwest. So when do you finish your studies? Or can you even predict that? Planning to be 2017. 2017. That's the future. And then what will take place after your studies?

Will you go into that field? Or do you think you'll stay in informational entertainment? So that's a very good question, if my supervisor's watching. No, it's fine. So I don't know yet whether I'll stay in academia but I'm definitely gonna do an awful lot more science communication Like the aim is kind of have a science communication career and whether I do academia on the side I haven't decided yet Alright, so the other PhD goes Yeah, well life is fluid, don't figure it out as you go

But the time you're interested in is who knows what the communication landscape is and what it looks like Exactly, I mean I've got another two and a half years in my PhD So yeah, I don't know maybe YouTube would have died Maybe we'll all be on Mars goodness knows Interior's into you Taking over Mars cheap. Yeah, and so you think the biggest strategy command these other humans Yes, a common either humans or Infectious disease which probably will be because of antibiotic resistance, which in itself is...

That's terrifying. That's terrifying to me. Antibiotic resistance. Do you think we're ever going to become zombies? Like, do you think that, like, the idea of zombies is possible at any point in time? So, there's the argument... Wait, there's the argument that you've we've got Cat ladies as a kind of zombie. Oh, oh

Toxoplasma Parasite inside your brain which changes your behavior There are lots of parasites that change Is it just decree be all living with a cat? I think it is between something like in the region of 2030 and 30% of people are infected with this top of class. Worldwide. Yeah.

Just women or everyone? No, they don't know how it breaks down. I know there's that thing with cat litter and pregnant women and it only affects women and stuff like that. That's toxic plasma, plasma, which is a thing that actually kills somebody. The infection caused by the top of the plasma. But this parasite will actually modify your behavior.

So it comes, so it's found in other animals and in other animals, it will change their behavior. And then people found it in humans. And it hasn't been studied that much, but they think it might change your behavior for their natural, but in other mammals that it in fact, it definitely changes that. What about it changes their reactions to cats

so that it actually makes them easier to be killed by cats? Yeah. How do you get it? It's a benefit to the cat. How do you get it out? I have it? Yeah, you probably do I rub my cat all over myself All over I always kiss his head who doesn't all over I'm always like oh what about like cordiceps What so cordiceps are the the fungus that sometimes? Take over ants. Oh, those ones, yeah. They've had some conceivably good Cordyceps ever mutate to the point where, you know, in the last of us video game where Cordyceps could infect humans and take over the video. I knew you were going to be a big one.

That would be a huge leap. Ants, brains, ants. Well, it's not just ants though. It's like one different species of quarter steps for every race. Yeah. But still in terms of being able to stay alive, because I mean, if you think they've got the exoskeleton, I mean, there are hundreds of parasites that do it.

The really creepy ones are the wasps, which lay their eggs inside of maggots or caterpillars. And then you get, there's a wonderful video where they might have to get a camera inside one of these maggots that hasillars and then you get, there's a wonderful video where they manage to get a camera inside one of these maggots that has these waslavi eating it out from the inside, eating the guts first and then eating just the bits of the brain that are left, oh I just, oh Jesus. So this um, then the caterpillar starts building this silk nest to protect the wasp larvae. And then when the wasp larvae burst through the sides of the caterpillar, the caterpillar

is still just alive enough to protect these wasp larvae from anything that wants to eat them, so it has their own zombie bodyguard. That's just scary. I actually- I don't know if you're asking this question. The mentor image I got at the beginning of that was someone like shoving a GoPro down the mic. Oh my god. I was just reminded my ex-girlfriend.

Oh my god. All right, are we out? Are we out then? We're out of time to wrap up. So, thank everyone for watching. Should we put up two things that came out today? Oh, go ahead. We got the laser team teaser trailer or no

Yeah, the first trailer the first trailer first trailer and then we have we nested RTX tickets We'll be going on sale on Wednesday. Oh, I totally missed the we know set. Yeah, we're selling RTX tickets for 2015 What is the date of our kids August 7th to 9th August 7th and 9th tickets go on sale Wednesday what time? 3 p.m. Central 3 p.m central. Is that we currently minus 6pm tea? Minus 5 I believe. We're kind of, yeah, do you like savings? You're minus 5 but by the end of this month you will be minus 6. Oh my gosh. I'm at that crazy period in time where my family honestly what I want to call them. Oh, okay, so we're minus 5 right now. The one hour. And it makes a difference. And of course, fiction fast forward which premieres tomorrow Yes, it's my first time I was supposed tomorrow and there'll be more stuff going up on the G.E. and Yeah, stuff going up on my channel eventually

So Ali, thank you for joining us. It was an absolute joy to have you on that channel. Yeah, it's lovely chatting And thanks everyone for watching. We're back on Wednesday with the patch Thursday with on the spot and again next Monday with another episode of Archie podcast So buy from South by Southwest. Bye everybody. Bye, thanks for watching. I love you. There you go. I like you a lot. Describe the show to a newcomer in a more familiar way.

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