Rooster Teeth Podcast - The Crystal Pepsi Challenge - #345

Episode Date: October 13, 2015

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It's time to put your pedal to the metal. From the twisted minds behind Deadpool and Zombieland, an executive producers will learn that an Anthony Mackie comes a new Peacock original series, Twisted Metal, a high-octane action comedy based on the classic video game series. Anthony Mackie stars as John Doe, a motormouth outsider who must deliver a mysterious package across a post-apocalyptic wasteland. If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnett, and Thomas Hayden Church. Twisted metal, streaming now, only on peacock Hello everyone!

Hey! Welcome to the RESTYF Podcast! This week brought to you by SeatGeek, Squarespace and Warby Parker All our three great sponsors that we're going to talk about later. Seat Geek. But for now, I'm Gus. I'm Gavin. I'm Barbara.

I'm Michael. And this is a podcast. Welcome, Michael. Thanks. Yeah, thanks for sitting in. I, uh, I was, I saw the, uh, the Martian this past weekend, uh, in the theater, which is a big deal for me because I will. We can't wait until the second week.

But still you don't see movies until they're like way down. You watch four to six weeks, right? I look normally, yes, but I looked out, because they were playing it at the Violet Crown downtown. And it's a theater, if you don't live in Austin, you don't know this, but it's a tiny theater. It's like 30 seats. So even if it's sold out, it's not crowded.

Like it's not a big deal. And- So one that has like, they're reclining chairs, and everything like that too. No, it's normal chairs, but they have food, like the animals, you get food and beer and drinks and stuff. So I showed up a little early and I was eating lunch. And I've been to the crowd many times.

So for some reason, this time for the first time ever I noticed that they sell their cocktails in theater size. So I asked the waitress, I was like, what is that mean? It's that big of a small. I was like, what is theater size means? She was, oh, it's a convenient larger size. So you can take it into the theater.

Movie with you. I was like, yes. I was like theater size drinks now, please. Is it like a big goal for that? No, maybe he's like a good. Is it in the same giant plastic cup or? No, it's like a giant glass. It's huge.

It's fancy. I'm not sure. It's giant motiny glass. So is it essentially just a double? It's, I think it's more than a double, it's massive. Yeah, it's a big message. It was like 12 bucks. Did you like have six of them there

and then have one more and bring it into the movie? Well, I watched a movie, so yeah. How was the Martian? It was pretty good. I had really good things about it. Like, being comparing it to all the other really good stuff I'm gonna be doing. Yeah, I thought it was way better.

Like, I loved gravity. I thought it was way better than gravity. Having said, I still think that the book was better because like the book is cost at problem. That's not my drink, but okay, I guess that's it. That's acoclamps. That is acoclamps. You're not taking it at a beverage. You guys just move a cocktail and go to the screen. But yeah, there were just more problems in the book. And I guess for the movie, since they only have like two hours, it's like, all right, we're gonna cut out like half of the stuff that goes wrong. Oh, really?

Yeah. I want to listen to the book. I thought it was like 20 minutes, like 15 minutes too long. The movie? Yeah, it was like two hours and 20 minutes. Yeah, but he was there for ages. Yeah, but there's like repetitive shots where there's like, there's a couple shots where it's like, okay,

the next time to drive around in the Land Rover, like the 19th time I think they're trying to put across the Damnotty. No, I see what you're saying. I felt like they if they had been doing that the whole movie I would have agreed with you, but I felt like they never really expressed how fucking long he was there. It was like Did he never say how many years or no, I would have told you the day he's over it, but it's like in a flash You know, he drove from one place to another the drive took 70 days, but it's literally just like cut It's like that's my drive and then cut. Oh boy. That was a long drive

It's like he took see took like over two months on that drive It's just like cut how much of the like monotonous math parts do they leave in the movie not much? Not much. It's like movie math yeah I science the shit out of this I'm gonna make water buzzwords hey hydrogen and oxygen yeah I'm gonna science the shit out of those plants it was plants on Mars it was in the other night it's pretty funny yeah there's like this which is what he's all about you and Ridley Scott yeah yeah I saw it on Gavin's recommendation.

Mm-hmm. No. I only have read the book. And I'm waiting for Aaron to finish the book before we see the movie. Well, it's not that long ago, book. So hopefully he'll be done by end of year. It's a movie you should pay to see that movie.

You shouldn't watch on a plane. It should be big. So you mentioned that it's a Ridley Scott movie. And I thought there was something really interesting. Normally, movie starts, and there's all the production companies and everything and they have like their logos and whatnot on this movie It did not say Scott three productions They had the long animated thing like that leads to his logo, but it never says Scott three productions at the very beginning at the very end it does plus like that's a baller move

Yeah, it's like you just put like a little animation in your logo and like no text. It's like yeah, you had to know what that is You really you really turned it around after Prometheus No, I liked Prometheus. I did not like Yeah, Prometheus was fine nothing happened in that movie it was a two and a half hour just jerk off and look It wasn't like special effects. I look at you as overly bad. It was just like as as a Ridley Scott movie Yeah, you just think why did he make it? Yeah, like what was the point of that? The war okay, so there's one thing we didn't see like one of those Harry Potter books like the the lore books that she made Where's like look?

They mention the alien there is one thing I'll concede to you about Prometheus and this is a spoiler for the movie so if you haven't seen a years old movie fuck you At the very end when there's like that giant thing rolling and the woman's like running away from it, it's like, you're a scientist, just run to the side. Yeah, it's like, I did not even think about that. You could literally run 15 feet in the other direction. That's what they shot at the guy.

That's what they shot at. It looks like really dramatic how they shot it. But if they just cut to a really high up wide, it would look so stupid. It was like, eat any other way, really. This is just one direction you run in that's bad. And that's the direction you're running. I mean, other than running straight backwards into it.

Right. It's also, you know, again, spoiler, but this is also the woman who just performed a C-section on herself. No, no, no, that was the best part. And she doesn't know to run to the side. I'm serious. Like this woman, like she, she performed surgery on herself

Yeah, takes a bunch of drugs. It's all fucked up and is on an alien planet I was like, yes, I love this movie. She was like fucking cutting aliens out of her guts We're so weird though because she did that and you're like where the fuck is everybody else? And then she just like walks into the other room and there's other people in there and it's like did she just huh? Be up there's literally scenes after that where she's just like all right. What's the the situation it's like you're not gonna run in and tell people what just fucking happened like Yeah, okay, that the C section machine for a reason you mean to tell us every time you use it We get it. It's Monday Why the dad

Martian was really good. I liked it a lot more than Prometheus Yeah, I think it's one of my favorite movies I've seen this year. How is Matt Damon? I think it was really good Well cast for that character. Yeah, I thought he played the character really well I mean the one concern I had is what everyone said. He played, you know, just an interstellar what the other year he just played an astronaut who was stuck by himself. Yeah, do you see that graphic of like

saving private Ryan into Stella and this movie? Like, people spend a lot of money trying to find Matt Damon. Yeah. I thought he did a good job. I don't know that it'll be up for like any best picture or best acting. I know that it's one of the first sci-fi movies that they think might be up for best picture. I don't know if I go that far. Yeah, I don't know that it'll be up for like any best picture or best acting. It's one of the first sci-fi movies that they think might be up for best picture.

I don't know if I go that far. Yeah, it's a good movie. It's that good. It was a long sci-fi movie. Good picture. Yeah. Okay, picture. It'll get, instead of best picture, it'll get better picture.

It's like good, better best. Can I talk quickly about an item that I received in the mail this week? Why is it going to be quickly? Because I don't want to talk about it the mail this week? Why are you gonna be quickly? Because I don't wanna talk about it very long. Why do you wanna talk about it? I guess I pre-ordered the coin, like when everyone was like funding that thing. Which must have been, I don't know, like 18 months ago or something. It was like two years ago.

So one showed up and I was like, it looked like Apple packaging, so it was just a white thing. I was like, oh my god, I bought a coin. How much were they? I was like 50 bucks, I think. Yeah, I'm so annoyed. How much were they? I was like 50 bucks, I think. Yeah, I'm so annoyed. So I basically spent. I'm so annoyed for this item I got that I forgot that I bought.

Okay, I know why you're annoyed. I spent like all of Sunday trying to use it in one place. It didn't, I tried it five places, it didn't work once. Where did you try to use it? Walmart target some bath and body asshole thingy. I love it at the store. It would not be asshole thingy. One it store if we're not a asshole thingy One of them I swiped it and it said it's a chip card put it in the chip read out. I was like, huh?

No, just it sucks. It's the worst it said it doesn't work sorry down with it I mean is in my wallet currently, but I won't use it mine's in my wallet and I probably haven't used it in months I just But I won't use it mine's in my wallet and I probably haven't used it in months Exactly, is it you can switch to the list and you can load all of your credit cards and debit cards onto it So it's just one and you click a button. It's it rotates between them. So it's digital you digitally add them on work Yeah, you sync with your phone you scan them into your phone and your phone Put some on your hands. They've done the cards. I never come out. That's the best part And they're in here and just can't use it and then your phone puts them on here. And then the cards have never come out. That's the best part. And the cards are in here and just can't use it.

And then there's just a button, that I guess switches through the card. Yeah, I guess it's supposed to kill it. If you leave that, it can't be used if it's not running to your phone. Oh, really? So it's just like to anyone else who finds it, it's useless. Have you tried using it?

It doesn't work. It doesn't work to your phone too. Have you tried swiping it like with your phone next to it as you're swiping it? Maybe it just needs to be put in something. I've been trying swiping it while giving the cashier your it as you're swiping it Maybe it just needs to be swiping while giving the cashier your phone I've got this I've tried swiping it while giving them my real credit card so that I can actually pay for whatever it is I want it's just really

If what if you hit the pin the pad on your side and they hit the register at the same time and see which one works Yeah, like it's cool to be on the front technology. Like it's cool to have this like future device, but it's so embarrassing when it doesn't work. And I was just, it was like a day of embarrassing. The only way you bought it before it came out. Yeah, but it's so easy. I'm saying it's out now. We bought it two years ago. The only way you buy the pinnacle of technology, you bought an idea. The only way it could be worse is if you had that fucking thing on your forehead, trying to pay for you look the biggest douchebag in the world. All looking through Google Glass. Did you look like a bump on the side of your head or like a bruise after using it? Yeah, because I did. And I had really bad headaches for like the next two days. Oh my god. So don't get that thing until

it's been tested. Don't get that thing. Ay! I see what you've done there. Yeah, that hurt. Yeah. I had like a ball just like right here. I don't know if you go back and you watch that video. You can Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy Very clearly defined. Yeah, in person you can see it by the look at the monitor Boston Would you feel bad if you like ruin Gus's brain permanently? I think there's other forces that work there. Yeah, that's your flavor Can I have a beverage? Yeah, yeah, beverage So you just got back from New York Comic Con Barbara. I did how that go. It was amazing It was me Lindsey Gray miles and Carrie and then a bunch of people who were doing sales and stuff like that as well. But we showed a clip from Ruby Volume 3 and told people that it's gonna premiere October 24th.

I heard people went ape. They went crazy. I think it's weird. I think New York is just a really big anime city and New York Comic Con's like a really big anime show. So pretty much everyone waiting to see us was dressed in Ruby cosplay. And I think someone said that we had the longest line

at the con, which is bizarre to me, because it's just like, we're just reshewed to you. Well, who else was there? Yeah, it's true. Losers. Brian Cranston. Yeah, bring your bags off the air. Get a new job, Brian Cranston.

Cook some meds. I got a little bit of Brian Cranston. He. He. Cook some madzill too. Godzilla, you know, close to Brian Cranston. He died in the first one. Is another spoiler for you? They're like 20 minutes into that movie. Do you think that was in his contract?

He's like, Dude, that was some fucking shady shit, right? That movie, like, he's all over the trailer. Everyone's like, watch Godzilla starring Brian Cranston the whole time. And it was like the kick-ass kid was not mentioned at all really in any capacity and then I'm sitting there watching the movie and I'm like I just discovered this is the main character of the movie it's fooled me it's like middle gear solid too you get to make the whole

name fuck it's right in you get fucking 30 minutes of snake and then have fun with Jack the Ripper who is is in the latest Melvia? Who's the main character? Big boss. Big boss here. Who snakes daddy, basically? His DNA, daddy. Yeah. So that's a clone.

He's a clone of Big Boss. Well, I didn't come out of him, but he's got his DNA. Yes, he didn't fire him from his body. That's what you're asking. He was like a sea-setched machine from his DNA. That's you had fun with us in in New York. We went to your couple gay clubs one night. I think you would have enjoyed it. I started that comment. You would have had really fun with the gay clubs. I think I said about it. It seemed like a good time. Yeah, who went all of us?

Everyone's you just named? Yeah, everyone. I think even sales carry actually took off before we went to them because he didn't want to come with us Oh, yeah, he didn't feel comfortable I guess he feels comfortable when feel comfortable here. There are always carry you just be getting numbers all night People come coming up to you dudes sitting on you left and right you saying carries Carey's got to go on. I'm saying like carry would would have gotten snatched up Right, so there was a there was one place we went to which we just looked up places to go. I don't think it was a gay club. I think it was a mix between a strip club and an escort service because it was this tiny little room that had all these curtains and benches and it was

very small. There was more. No way. So you described the curtains in the benches to me earlier. I did. You need to go into a little more detail about this configuration of the curtains in the benches So imagine a room about the size of the podcast set This is the bar right there and this is the whole room. There was probably about I want to say 20 or so male strippers and like three people in there. We're just like bumping in to each other Yeah, they're just like talking to each other, like hanging out somewhere on the bar, dancing. Literally hanging out? No, they were wearing some pretty like secure thongs.

Okay. Yeah, any cheetah prints? Anything fancy? No, no. What she said, what I found was interesting was that there were benches and then there were curtains immediately in front of the bench. Yeah, like you could see people's legs hanging off the benches.

You could see people's legs hanging off the benches. Like imagine us on the podcast set but we had like a curtain right here. Oh, so they're being jacked off on a curtain. It's like if you want to take a quick ski trip. Did you want me to explain it just so you can be benches? Just waiting, you had to do it. I was waiting, I got my skin joke Explain it myself

That was such a long set up for a 6 out of 10 joke It was a 7.5 You moved your mic What do you mean? It was that funny It was funny that you set it up Like like the actual process was funny than the joke. The bit was funnier than the joke, I'll give you that. Alright. That's comedy. That's a RISG podcast. Almost 350 episodes. Why? What was this one? 345? This is 345, 345, right?

Oh wow, 3. That's so weird. That's so weird. I'm excited for 350. yeah. Yeah, it's, huh? I'm excited for 350. Yeah, you got to be cool, milestone, yeah. Okay, I'd be on it. Yeah, why not? Okay, thanks. I want to be on it too.

I don't think I'll be here. Not you, Barbara. God, we should plan something for that. I think about it. Normally we're bad about planning stuff. I know Halloween's a couple of years ago. Just be bad about that too and do nothing. Yeah.

It's easy. There's a room full of people over there, do something. There. Oh, for the, are they nodding? Or for Halloween. No, Maryl said no. Do you know what you're going as? Uh, I normally don't get dressed up.

I assume there's some sort of potty happening somewhere. Yeah, there's, it's on a Saturday this year. So I never make like, so it's always a problem. I don't want to go to the effort of finding a Halloween costume because invariably I'm not gonna do anything. I'm probably be at home But then at the last minute if you find out if I find out like oh, there's something I really want to go do Then it's like oh fuck well. I don't have a costume We can just get one and just if you have them as it is like some shitty thing

I'm gonna go like to target and like get one now and just who cares? Just use your Until 20 weeks ago. You cost you again. That's a prime example. I got invited to a party I want to last minute. I literally went to target and the only costume that was left in all of Target was like a child's Luigi costume. It's where could you have it? So you look a crotchless louis See that that's a that's a scenario you hang it out. It worked out perfect

Yeah, and so that in that case that did work if you can find it I don't know I posted a picture of it. I hope so Well, you're gonna be Michael. I don't know probably nothing what we lost laughing together last second I don't even do it. I probably didn't do anything. I don't remember. I usually do shit We did he talks about Halloween every single year especially right around September like and September should go on and on about Halloween and That looks pretty good for Child would fit into that One What child would fit into that? The legs are six one the legs that's all play up your shins. Look at that

It was really stretched. No, it's super short on him. That's just a long sleeve. That looks amazing I would I think that's your size somehow the biceps was still baggy though Sure, what are you gonna be Gavin your dick costumes retired, isn't it? I said I would have tied the penis off to three and I did three is actually funny cuz Meg really wants you to retire The testicles fell off. Oh, she's Well, he's retired one of them already Yes, I'm not I'm not sure I'm gonna be that is of a giant costume But it's don't be obscene. What's how's it?

What's the other piece? No, that's obscene Gavin. You don't you don't have the right Okay, to be a vagina Yeah, I don't know if I can nose you could just wear like do I do like a body suit You know like a green man suit but cut out your nose So just you should get all black and then just have the nose and then at night you'll just look like a nose. So I'm literally dressed up as my nose to scale. Yes. That's stupid.

Yeah. It's not a bad idea, honestly. I'm sorry, your nose is stupid. I'm showing it to the last three years. What we should have to ridiculous. What would be really interesting is if we 3D scan your nose and then we print it on the 3D printer. And then you and I can dress up as his nose to scale.

What like legs coming out of each nostril? No, no, no, like just like that. I can't get back. What do you mean? What do we do that to scale? I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I

said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I say, I said, I said, I said, I said Yeah, yeah, the legs come out of my nose right to scale I got excited by the big nose idea we made up to yeah, that would bet a big nose is your normal To scale 30-printer might be a bit smaller for a large wearable version I'd wear gowns nose as a giant costume. I'd wear that with your lace coming out my leg Where Gavin's nose is a giant costume I'd wear that your lace coming out my leg

Coming out his nostrils and then my face coming out somewhere the top of his nose the bookies Let's know all of that that be stupid. Well, there'd have to be I'm not gonna go blind Gavin. We had some Should we I Think I wanted should we talk about some of the crazy ideas for RTX like I scrapped What's the last year? Oh scrapped for this year. I was going to say that I want you Harley Quinn for Halloween potentially. Oh, that'd be good for you.

Yeah. It's a good one. I'll try that. Here, let me read this one. I'm going to think about whether or not I want to tell this story. She is a woman. Blah.

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and enter promo code teeth in the app. SeatGeek will send you $20 once you've made your first SeatGeek purchase. Every ticket purchased on SeatGeek is backed by 100% guarantee, downloaded for free today, and used promo code teeth for $20 back after your first purchase. If you're going to go watch sports event, why not? It's $20, $23. Who doesn't want? It's like if you went to the game and you found $20 on the ground, you pick it up. Do it. That's my sales pitch it's I agree that's $20 you would

because you're not stupid um anyone who wouldn't like who wouldn't see if I say I would you would probably make a Jewish comment no I wouldn't I feel like even a billionaire would pick up a 20 would the billionaire yeah fuck no really no billionaire of a C 20 dollars but I'd make a point not to pick it up. I'd like I'd like I'll be like jeez burn that 20 when I just keep walking Is there some such as I tell beaves behind him to film jeez burning Beaves and you have jeez and then beaves it gets worse that the newer you are The biggest guys name shithead. Shmeaves. God is that work does that wait for the person to run you to die

guys name shithead. Shmeaves. How does that work? Does it have to wait for the person to run you to die? Now you could sit on jeeps and beefs. I'd watch it. Do you want to be beefs? No, why don't you be beefs? Because I'm not going to be beefs. What's beyond? Well, you'll be the billionaire. Yeah, oh, I'm not. I mean, it's about beefs and jeeps. I want to be jeeps. All right, I mean, I think I'm more qualified being English. He does have the accent. Oh, hello, sir I mean You're English You already have an English accent. Why did you have to I was doing posh? I was doing like upper class I'm not upper class. You heard me sound of the exact same no sound a little bit about him

Well when he pretends to be British, he's a man. So he puts on, oh, okay, I'm talking like this now when I'm British. So you're, you're giant nose comment. I'm gonna tell story. Your giant nose comment reminded me about something that we wanted to do, but that we ended up scrapping. Yeah. Uh, this is our TX. And uh, so every, we go to this process where I think up really stupid, crazy off-the-wall ideas. And it's just like fun. And this year, one of the ideas that we have.

Did you just describe fun? Yes, that we scrapped was, I wanted to have these giant bobble heads constructed for every on-screen cast member. But it would be like, imagine if you had a bobble heads constructed for every like on screen cast member but it would be like imagine if you had a bobble head or like but it was just the head and the head was like six feet tall like a mascot and someone could get inside of it and walk around as your giant head sounds terrifying that sounds pretty awesome but the thing is is that you wanted to wear your own head and like hide in plain

sight as like a giant six foot version of your own head and like hide in plain sight as like a giant six-foot version of your own head There's a time you were seriously considering that we had we had to spec out like how to build suspenders into it and How the working would work like we had we had All of it whatever one line would have the shit kicked out You could have made a little race Yeah, that's like you see that that at baseball games and stuff like that. I'm sad that you didn't do it. Maybe next year, but I've said it now, so we're probably never do it.

Yeah, but just like- Yeah, I mean, for a person, all you used to be could have them. Yeah, for a person. You've already got the specs. Oh, my. You're going to throw that away. I had the most amazing, maybe the most amazing coincidence that's ever happened to me in my entire life.

Wow, that's a bold thing. So I was on a Facebook, and some, Facebook and some people post just shite on Facebook. Like, oh, do this thing. It's not interesting. There was a thing where you just put in your date of birth and it tells you how many days you've been alive and I was kind of curious. I was like, yeah, I'll put in my date of birth. Probably so they can just take my date of birth and then they have that information,

but I don't care, it's already on my Facebook. I put it in and I press submit and it said 10,000. I was like, seriously, the only day I've ever checked to see how many days old I am, I'm exactly 10,000 days old. Like what the chants is of that? That's ridiculous. I saw you tweet about it and I figured you had planned this

along coming in the bats and it's set like a reminder for yourself about it. I was exactly 10,000 days old and that was on Friday or something. That's that is crazy It blew my mind. I was like did I do it wrong like am I did I mess it up? It was weird. I guess it takes into account all the leap days. You're 27. Yeah You made it longer than I thought you would Me too like congrats. I figure now so congrats Well, you know got about 400 days on you. Little bro.

No, that's a, that is a crazy coincidence. You did not oversell the scale of that coincidence. Yeah, I felt really jealous after you, you made that comment. I was like, oh, how many days have I been alive? That's not a cool number. And I was like, what's it going to take for me to get there? No.

Well, what was your life? You should date 20,000? Oh, yeah, for 20,000, you have to be like 54 or something. Oh, I didn't think you'll make that. Yeah, I was like, about 15,000. I probably won't I don't know how you love having Laughing because you won't but then I think 15,000 was like 41 or something You could do that. I might be able to make it. We'll see. Hang in there man. Hang in there kitty Show I can say I don't know you said some of our Gavin's nose again something about Gavin's nose and its legs Um, let's fix it right fixes nose. Yeah, we should like film that fixing your nose. It's been broken for so long

I'm part of his look. Yeah, I'm like I think I'm gonna use that one get smashing my nose. Come put down Lines in place. It's still the blood would be tremendous. We get it rag Like you just get something to punch you. We can edit. Well, I don't why everyone goes right to punching But I mean if that's what it comes to we'll have to do that But why didn't always probably fix his nose Yeah, it became his look every didn't fix it my first instinct would be fix it Right

You get your nose broken? It's such like a middle feature of your face. It's exactly a middle feature of your face. I'm just not went wrong. It's in the middle of it. Or it has gone wrong. People are comfortable with it. No, I understand. Shake it up. You don't want to mess with that. It could be so much better.

I am so... Don't you want it to be better if his nose was like fixed and correct, we would not at all talk about like scanning it and 3D printing it. Yeah, everyone's got to have their own. We might, we might right now. Gavin's nose is like, look at that thing. It's fucking huge and ugly, you know? I don't say it, but some people do.

But what it became. Look at Gavin's nose. It's amazing. I want to know is like that. That's what it could be. You see that close. No one's ever been in fix it. It's not only broken, it's just big anyway.

So even if it was fixed it's just big and beautiful baby. Just get some of it. Fix it. I'm okay with having a thing. It could be my nose like Gus has got his absurd eyebrows. Hey. What? Look at it. Like eyebrows are absurd. Gus also has his absurd eyebrows. Hey! What? He's coming about me! Look at it!

My eyebrows are absurd. Gus also has a really very... They're very distinguishing. I do have a big nose. If the head rest of stars... How come you never talk about that? Gus is sitting next to him. Gus also has a really big nose.

It's just wider than Gavin's. It's also... It's pretty normal next to Gavin. That's why I sit next to him. Yeah, we find this. That's smart move. Yeah, that's true. I'm trying to... I'm trying to help you out

I can't connect to the Wi-Fi so I can't stream this to the TV bus I like that they went with the green legs. Yeah, you want to key it out. God's is a Color of bookers some sort of nose costume. Oh, yeah, they like bogey Yeah, Cody Smith CMS Burke on bogies coming out. Yeah, it's Cody Smith CMS Burke on Twitter for that. It's good. I don't know why your nose has like a switch on the side. Here's the idea for the next RTX. Everyone has their own nose and then we do nose jousting and if I don't win I'll be annoyed. If I can like split another nose and half with mine, I'll be amazing. If I could like split another nose and half with mine, it'll be amazing

It's all the graphic. How would you how would you joust that like your nose is on the end of a pole? I mean the legs they'd actually smash you to the Perfect. I'm saying I'll be unstoppable. We run him with what with your legs inside No, I got you. Okay, okay, confusing. You're talking about wearing noses. I'm like, then you're just smashing your faces together. What drives the nose? Don't let you. Don't let you. Don't we keep it and confuse them?

The exact same subject. No idea. It's just crazy. No idea. That's a mix of entertaining content. So we got way off track. Did we? Where are we on track? It's a lot.

I wanted to talk more about New York Comic Con. Oh, yeah. Like we started and then we ended up talking about skiing and all the other stuff. I got. The long set up to your own show. Talking about noses. So I'm always really curious because I feel like most events

don't understand what Rupert he does. So they try to organize these events like, oh, this type of product goes here, all of this type of content creators go here. And then wherever they think we fit. Yeah, we're usually in the vendor hall. Right. So like at San Diego Comic Con, we're in the webcomics area. Webcomics don't even exist anymore, I don't think, but we're under a banner that says

that. Maybe is that because of Penny Arcade, maybe? Who fucking knows? Peter K's not even there anymore. But they do a webcomic still. Yeah, but they don't do Sandi O' Coma-Con. Maybe they want them to come back. But they used to be, I think, across the aisle. They used to be.

Yeah. So what were the booths around you at New York Comic Con? It was a lot of comic books, a lot of t-shirt vendors. I didn't see any games around us or anything like that. So pretty much just people doing sales. But we were the only people who were doing autographs and stuff like that as usual. And we had other exhibitors come up to us, like as we were signing one time with me and Lindsay and they're just like, you got to move your line. It's in front of our booth. And I'm like, what the fuck do you want me to do? Like

get con staff to have it manage or something. It's just like, Also, you're welcome for all the traffic. Right. If it was me, I would be super grateful. Because I would have people I'm constantly trying to sell to in front of my booth. That's what Megaston C. Forced is all the time at San Diego Comic Con.

They're just like, we love it. It's a captive audience that we could just sell things to all they're waiting in line. You get three hours to look at shit around you. It's like, yeah. I'm looking at that for three hours. Maybe I'll buy it. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I could see why they're upset. But that's like the whole like, it's weird for me to say it. Like they should be optimistic about it. Look at

it. It's like the glass is half full. There is there are people there you could take money from. Also, like I don't want to compare us to an actual celebrity, but like if a lighter wood or someone was signing out of it, would would yeah we work with them so yeah true we're on the same level would you go up to him and be like hey your lines too long manage it no of course not you'd get consicurity or something like that yeah it's just like what do you want us to do I'm sorry we're in the middle of doing this shit so it's very hard to move a line once it's formed. Yeah. Yeah.

It takes a lot of people to shift everyone back and make gaps and stuff. I don't know what it is, but the New York Comic Con stuff. I don't know if you remember this from 2011, but they're just like nowhere to be seen. Yeah. I don't think I saw a single volunteer all weekend. I'm just like, I don't know where they are. Well, it's the same thing like at in San Diego. It's like, you don't see them unless they're there to tell you you're doing something wrong. Yeah. Yeah, what's the same thing like it in San Diego. It's like you don't see them unless they're there to tell you're doing something wrong

Yeah, yeah, exactly like there. There's no or unless someone passes out In your booth on your I don't think we've even saw them then the only people we saw were the fucking paramedics I shouldn't be laughing. It was funny. She's okay. I saw a lot of stuff. I have a head boy She lived. You me and Michael and Chris were there in 2011 at New York County. That was a time ago. That was a good time. Yeah. The only place we went to on that trip was that Irish bar I think. Yeah, I was like across the street from the hotel. I went

there several times. God, I got so drunk. That's where you arm wrestled each other. Yeah, I didn't remember a lot of stuff. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that Yeah, I forgot we arm wrestle. I have that video I don't think so I was rocking an LG chocolate at the time So I don't know my phone I see my I have a photo that photo where I'm like getting rid of arm wrestle bar I think yeah, the arm wrestle bar I was like

It was like when we were in London that time and I found all these videos on my phone of me like tackling you over Of your bed and us arguing about Stylons Yeah, we like to get ice running in your underwear Yeah, remember that and then we ran into each other Yeah, I think it was Gus Gus arm wrestling barbra. I can't remember who orchestrated that I think it was me because after you had kicked my ass I know because I've almost do after oh was it I think so was that after maybe it was after I just remember that I

remember I'm a crystal Chris and then Gus and Gus on wrestled me and Barbara Remember from that and Gus Gus when I beat him he said something along the lines of beforehand like I have no Dish something about not having a dick and when when I won he yelled I have no dick in the bar Because we were on the second floor It was empty on the second floor if you on wrestled every single person at this company Would you win 50% or don't do a... I'd say he'd win 30% Do we have Apple TV by his side? There's a lot of people on this company though.

I bet there's tons of people you could be... I'm trying to figure out if he could be over 50% Sorry, I'm trying to see if I can get this photo. Do you see it? Is it not there? No? No, all right. Hey, come back to it. Just let it sit. So, we'll cut it in.

Oh, that's cool. And then it's like you'd be like, zoom in. I'm just like You weren't there could I beat 30% of the people in this company? Absolutely not you think you failed to let more than 50% Absolutely, well, I'm sure there's a lot of people who are just like Athletic in this company Compared to you So here's the the photo and then if you like So here's the photo and then if you like zoom in That is one of the worst photos of me

I'm pretty sure you or Esther at least for the next like two days one of you had that as your lock screen too I had it for years Here is the one guy Zoom didn't picture the picture for years. I remember that. I remember that from that weekend. You showing your phone. You got in. That was also that was when I met Kevin. The drug dealer. All right. New York. Come with Contribute in 2001. That guy is fucking famous now. Do you think he knows? I hope not. We should do a documentary. Finding Kevin. No, I'm good.

Why? Because he'll like kill me. Do you remember when he went to jail? I don't remember what he looks like now. I was like, I remember right after the podcast, he talked about it. I'm like, yeah, the guy was standing right here. This is exactly where he was. And he was two months after, but probably not even two months after it happened, ever

since then. Because the next week. I wonder if he ever got picked up. I hope he doesn't kill me. I hope he never finds out. Yeah, there's this drug dealer right outside this hotel. I'll tell you exactly where he is. I think like a month after we went to that New York Comic Con, that was back in 2011, like a month or two after that.

There was something, you know, there's always like, there's those shitty stupid ass websites like Pop Rots you photos of celebrities that all they do is post photos of celebrities walking in and out of buildings. There was one of, I forget, I even don't remember what it was, some celebrity like walking into like a sex shop in New York.

And I was like, I remember that shop, that's like a block away from where Kevin was. It was like just down the street. Yeah, for where we were staying. I remember, I had people up until like last year, like in 2014, I got a tweet that was like just down the street yeah I remember we were staying I remember I had people up until like last year like in 2014 I got a tweet that was like found cabin store and it was the fucking place like across the street like I've described where it is and this the store is still open people are like I can't believe I made it he ruined his spot did they buy drugs from him that's a real question I

don't I mean they left that part out if they did they probably just went in and had what was his stod sex? What do you have he didn't really tell me? Yeah, you have to go into the alley to find out you have like a Coat with like all the difference like a watch salesman. He didn't he didn't whip it out He his thing was more like monetarily. How much do you have you'll get depending on like your book? Which is like my backer level is like what's your fucked up budget? Yeah, we got drugs for every level Yeah, and then it's like drugs. What is that, how's the sex across the street? Where's the cap end?

Yeah, like if you said, yeah, I got 20 grand on me. Is he like, have this massive brick of cocaine? Okay, okay. I don't think Kevin had 20 grand. I did, he's carrying that. Yeah, because then somebody else would just, just saying, I don't think he had, somebody else would mug him and take that.

Like a five to ten thousand dollar drug dealer really trust on maybe that's pretty well yeah maybe a couple of them maybe like you know five yeah have three eight have you ever seen the people in uh... new york who sell stuff like that

like not necessarily just drugs like watches or whatever was like they've got like a briefcase like you are a lot worse my watchers I've seen a million of them Kevin was a lady who's like dude I got drugs you know my drugs those people are terrible like like the watches and the this and that and the knock off shit it's a real gold watch like why do you have 50 real gold watches in a three-kiss? already this doesn't make sense uh...

uh... in real Rolex New York what? New York? What? New York's especially bad too with the panhandlers like giving out shit and then trying to charge you for it. I'll give you the CD man. It's free. It's free. Hey can you donate to my rap career?

It's like all right. You son of a bitch. Or if there's ever like a couple, they'll do the like give, you know, whoever, you know the female or what have you the rose or whatever like It's free that'll be $10 just to the other person fuck off Like a piece of shit then by turning down a rose for you bud. No, I Fuck you if you're if your bird is like I can't believe you didn't let that guy scam you out of $10 Then she's needy when time

I'm gonna go buy you something. It's not like, this man's accosted me on the street. I got it for you. How sentimental. I had almost like the next level up from that here in Austin. One time I was driving out of the HUB over there, like the Hancock Center HUB, and I was driving to the parking lot, and I was getting ready to pull out on a 41st street,

and this car's pulling like right where the freebirds is. So I'm like in the parking lot, and this car pulls in, and he's like, he turned in front of me, and then like, kind of stop right next to me. And I still like our drivers windows are right by each other. And he rolls his window down. He's like, something must be wrong in my car, right? Like this guy's trying to flag me down. So I roll my window down and the guy like, he leans out the window and he goes, he goes, hey, you look like a guy who enjoys rap music. You want to buy CDs? Why are you driving?

Well, I'm driving. We stopped cars in the parking lot. who enjoys rap music, you wanna buy CD? What? What? What? Why are you driving? Well, I'm driving. We stopped cars in the parking lot. What? Did you just do the window up in his face? I had the most confused look on my face. I was like, what?

I just drove off. It's fine. But that's captivating. Because if someone tries to give me something or something, that's straight, I don't stop. I don't listen. Yeah. You don't expect it when you're in a car. I was on the that's true I was on the New York subway this trip because I got lost downtown and I couldn't I didn't I didn't want to take a Uber back because I would have taken an hour in rain you went alone into the subway in New York. Yeah

Jesus. I used to live in Montreal so I'm used to sub anyways. Let's ignore the fact and she went on this whole rant and everyone was just ignoring her of course. But then she went out to each person with her cup and every single person she would talk to them trying to get the money for herself. And at one point, someone was just like, no thanks man. And she was like, all right, well, God bless you. And then she started coughing into my fucking face.

Oh my god. Oh my god. And I was like, I probably have some she started coughing into my fucking face. Oh my god. Oh my god. And I was like, I probably have some type of STD at this point. I'm gonna get off and wait for her to leave and then get back on. You actually got off the train. I got caught, I got coughed on by a homeless lady on a New York subway.

Was your mouth open? No. It's a valid question. Is it? I feel like she would have mentioned that though. You're like, right? I ate this woman's cough. Tasted awful.

Tastes like crystal meth. Oh, have you seen the mugshot of that woman who got arrested in Florida? No. And her name's crystal methany. Oh, God. No, what? Look at her.

I'm seeing we can find it. Why? That has to be a joke. I've seen it, like I've seen several different versions of it. I cannot find any article disproving it Oh my god, I've got a fucked up parents would name their daughter crystal Maybe it was just like I love my hobby. I'll change my name. It's like Jeff changing his name to laser Yeah, same thing he did it. He's like he went she went to the core hash. You had to change your name to crystal

They're like middle names for you to methanie. Why not? Oh, not her last name. It says Crystal Methany. That's all I remember. Oh, okay. There it is, they found it. Oh, God. Wow. Arrested. For what?

I wonder. The opposite. She wanted to change it into Crystal. Like last name is free too. Sweet. Methany. Methany. It's all included.

Where did your family from? Florida. There's no way that was a real name right? It could have been. No, there's no. Methany. Maybe her parents are just really, really dense. Methany. But that's our last name. Methany. No one. It's not a real last name. How do you know it could be bullshit? Where is that come from? Your family were proud mess farmers in the middle ages Us and the millers I can buy the crystal part. I don't know if I can buy the methanie part methanie Oh, does anyone have a cough in your face? Do you want them to it can can happen live. No. Uh, I, I, it must have happened. I can't think of a time.

I was trying to think of like the grossest thing that ever went in my mouth. Probably a farm from the public. Do you remember when we were a con in Dallas? The grossest thing that ever went in my mouth. We got, we got a really crowded is what he said. We got a really crowded crowded lift yeah, and this guy like smushed against me He had these like massive sweaty dreadlocks and one of the one in my mouth. I remember that oh my god And I was just like Guess was just like oh I saw I saw it happen Yeah, they were like thick too. They were huge

They were moist. There's some stuff living in dry looks like that. That was like nine years ago. That was my first time doing anything with Rucity. Really? Is it your first time? Get some dry looks in your mouth. Oh.

That's my only memory of Dallas. Is that sweaty, dreadlock mouth? The thing I can think of is when I was growing up I had a bunk bed at one point in my room and my oldest brother was on the top of the bunk eating Taco Bell. And he was chewing it and I found him I was over and he was talking and he looked up and he's still out of his mouth and he's in his mouth. And he's a Taco Bell in his mouth while he was talking It was amazing

He's fucking lost it It's so awful It was fucking gross It's like food isn't bad enough. It's gotta be taco bell It wasn't chewed up taco bell It was just like a kiss No it was chewed up It was a chewed up taco

It fell out of his mouth I feel like I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up.

I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up.

I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chewed up. I always chew like oh Michael does that all the time. I've seen you like foam at the mouth almost at some point So when you get really excited about something I'm like before like where I'll like I'll be standing we're talking to someone and be like a Nothing you could do but in the middle of talking, say I'm drooling on myself.

Yeah. Because everyone's just like, I, did you just have a fucking stroke? Why knowledge it? You just went up in front of it. What's the name of that little bakery that's by the Driscoll or attached to Driscoll? Oh, Cafe 1886? Yeah, we were there once and you've like, the glass of orange juice and you put it all in your mouth and then like half of it just fell out of your mouth. Like all over the place.

Yeah. It was just like, God's. What? It's like, if they were the seals at the corners of my mouth, it's like that doesn't close right or something. Because that's what happens. Do you have a weird bite? No, my bites.

It was enough to like make an audible splash on the table. It's like, and we were just like, oh, and again, you have to own it cuz we were like are you okay like is something I like no I just drop Yeah, do you guys ever gleeke? I don't gleeke. I can't gleeke on demand, but it has happened and happens to me at the dentist all the time Did I tell you about the time where I was stacking veg at waitrose and I almost killed the baby? Yeah, it was different to the baby incident, but I gleeped and it got stuck on It was different to the baby incident, but I glied and it got stuck on. It stuck on what? It got stuck and it was just like, it kept coming?

Yeah, it was like contractions. I was like, I was like stacking oranges, something. I was like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, into the fruit. Not weird. Yeah. And the only time I've got stuck in gleeke mode, but it was like five or six contractions and I just couldn't stop it. Supas are. Yeah. It doesn't happen if your mouth is open and you try to swallow at the same time.

Isn't that how you do it? I think you have to just piss off one of the glands and it is jizzes. Yeah, I think it's like a salivary gland that just sucks. Some people can do it on the run. Yeah? I just like your description of it

I like someone reporting to a manager like excuse me your employee is streaming small jets of saliva all over the fruit All of it. Are you really need to do something about that? Oranges Yeah, they got skin. Yeah, they have a cover. Tell you what fighting in orange with a skin on not good And if you don't have that I've done that Why? Very recently. We were filming something

I'm just I was coming video for you. It was a drink something really old. Hmm Okay, have you seen those? The acoustic portion of the podcast. Yeah, I never heard of them, but that was a thing called Pepsi crystal or something. Yeah, crystal crystal Pepsi.

Crystal Pepsi. I remember that. I don't think we had them in England, but there's like a craze going around the internet now where people are getting hold of them And a drinking them now. Oh God and nobody can keep them down Yeah, they're really small and everyone just like downs them and immediately throws up. Oh Try can we get me one? Yeah Because it won't yeah, so they've gone bad. They go they go slightly yellow What and everyone vomits within like three minutes? So, you know, if they go down or won't. Yeah, they're gone bad. They go slightly yellow. Wow.

And everyone vomits within like three minutes. Why would you try it? Dude, send me crystal Pepsi. I love when crystal Pepsi probably came up in 1991. I think they said just continue Pepsi in 93. Okay, so I remember I love crystal Pepsi because at the time I was like a broke teenager. And in order to promote crystal Pepsi,

they had that promotion where it's like, if you unscrew the cap, you might win something. If you just wanted to fund a commuter, you could look through the bottom of the bottle and look for the one that said you win a free drink. So it's like, I paid for one Crystal Pepsi ever. And then it's like, I would just look through the bottom and I could find another one that's a free drink

and it's just like, free drinks all the time. There's no way they could have made money off of that. I guarantee you that's one of the reasons they had to have discontinued that. Remember the good old days? Like that would never happen now. Like the equivalent now is some fucking smart nerd is like, they're left those fucking sequence open and I hacked right in. You know, and I'm just like, ah, that'll never be me. Because the internet exists now. So back in the day, it's like, no one thought I'm doing this is looking through a fucking bottle. Oh, they're oh god. There is old stuff

That's even in a glass bottle. It's like piss. Is that glass? No, yeah, it goes slightly to me now It goes slightly yellow. Oh my god. Who would even like a try? Okay, okay, that bottle's from 1990. Yeah, I'll drink it. Wow. I'll totally it. I'll totally drink it It looks like that after 20 years 25 years I just want to know what a quarter century what in there is going. Yeah, I guess that's very long That is going so reactive with the stomach like what's happening in that drink? What has happened in 20 years? I'll beat it. It turned to get down. I'm Turned to crystal pepsin. All right. Let's see. Then we stop

I was no that was bad no, that was bad. Barbara said it was bad. Wow. What? It's rare that I get met with that level of silence. So I'm going to say it again. Crystal pepsony. Is it called back to Crystal Methony?

Is it earlier, joke? Should we get on the screen right? Maybe my mic's not working. It reminds the broadcast of the joke he's telling. If anyone has one uh send it in I'll drink it I'll dress it on and make sure make sure it's sealed otherwise it won't drink he and it oh wait someone someone just tweeted that or do oh no he totally blew up I thought they said that someone had actually managed to keep it down but the thumbnail is him vomiting. Yeah, yeah,

it's just as I I've watched a few videos of it and I it's around three minutes. I can't believe you never told me about this. So it's like keeping things for me at that point is it like epica maybe that's what's become maybe that's what they go epica they take a crystal pepsy did you see that they're gonna... That Pepsi is gonna make a limited edition of Pepsi Perfect to commemorate the back to the future to anniversary?

Oh, I guess in the future they had Pepsi Perfect. They were giving away a whole bunch at New York Comic Con and they said they would give one to anyone dressed as a morning McFly. Oh really? And so I think it was Sunday morning. There was just a sea of probably four or five hundred people dresses in my name. That explains that because I saw that photo with no context and I was just like, all right. Yeah.

So I'm kind of back to the future thing going on. I don't know how that many people found. That's a box. And people were for a free fucking Pepsi. I think they're selling that Pepsi perfect for like 20 bucks. I think 20 bucks a bottle maybe Shit, maybe 23 is from now. Don't make you fall in there. It is Okay, okay, okay, it's pretty cool. So here's what I'll do. I'll buy two I'll drink one now. I'm really one 20 years 25 25 years, okay, I'm sure I'm alive almost 26 If you're alive then by the time you hit your 20,000th day On my 20,000th day sure drink that Pepsi and sit down a 54 year old Michael

For sure, oh that's really depressing when he's 54. Yeah, if I may get to 54 How is your 30-year-old Yeah, you're the young in two I am the young You're only nine years older. Yeah, but the same as you the same age as your brother brother with the Taco Bell same age as you. You have a thing the one day when we're a lot older. It would be cool to listen to all these podcasts now as we progress. It's already

weird to me to listen because we've been doing them for you know since 2008. Yeah, well, I'm already worried that I won't have enough time to listen to the whole right before I die It's like when you start doing that when you're gonna die You should ask someone and like so many hours of content so many hours of dribble. It's weird to think I don't want to listen to it I like Listen to this drill. It'll be like oh, I was an idiot when I was 20. Oh, I was an idiot. I was like, I can't raise a listen to this drill. It'll be like, oh, I was an idiot when I was 20. Oh, I was an idiot when I was 27.

It'll be funny. It's basically a great thing to be an audio diary of your life. Like, I've been on almost every episode since, you know, for seven years now. So to think back and listen to things that were happening to me then, like, listen, how excited I'm about lost. So you know, seven years ago, or... I just wanna hear myself complain about stuff

and be like, you idiot, that's not real. It's funny because I even think about that now. We talked fairly often about game of thrones. Breaking bad was even a year and two years ago now, I guess. But yet to me, lost is like the oldest podcast discussion. That's like the OG TV show going on during the podcast. And I was just thinking about the other day, I was like, man, it's going to be fucking weird when game of thrones is like seven years old, you know, like holy shit.

Yeah, but not the air. Here, I'm going to read this other thing. When I remind everyone, this episode of the podcast is also brought to you by Squarespace. Start building your website today at squarespace.com. For free trial and 10% off your first purchase, go to squarespace.com slash rooster teeth. With Squarespace, your site will look professionally designed, regardless of skill level, no coding required.

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And if you decide you like it, you can sign up. And then get 10% off your purchase right there. You can buy going to squarespace.com slash research. Love it. Everyone should have their own website. Go do it. I didn't own my own, I didn't own my last, look I own big domain solo.com.

I don't do anything with it. But my last name is kind of unusual so I never bought it. And then like one year some fucking asshole bought it. I think it was like an insurance salesman bought it and like put his like in his name's roll. Yes, and he put like his insurance company website on it. I was like, mother fucker. What do you think methanie.com is?

Can we find out? Let's find out. Hey, so then that's what convinced me finally I was like, I got I got a fucking buy it. So now I just have it like on the long history and you're a female. Do you have like go set. Surolla. No, I don't I don't have such cool email address. I don't use it for anything. I just just parked. I don't want anyone else using it. Do you think Methany.com. Do you think Jones is taken? Find yourself in the building. Do you think Jones is taken? Probably. I don't think so.

The website? What is the site? Do you think Michael Jones is taken? The state Jones.com. I get it. Yeah. It's Jones. The Jones International Corporate website.

What? I don't know them. Michael. I was born. You were related to them? I was born. They were like, listen. No one will ever be talking about you ever when they say you name just say you know

There's always someone Michael or Jones it will never be you. It'll always be someone else Michael Jones calm is not loading that doesn't necessarily mean it's not available, but If you could change your last name what would it be? I? Don't know Methody. Oh, I would change it to anything. I've never thought about changing it to anything You just redo my whole name, that'd be great. What? No offense, mom and dad. You don't like your name?

I've hated my name since. You don't like Barbara? Barbara's so cool because nobody is cool, Barbara of your age. I guess I've grown to appreciate over times because it's unique. I don't not name like no offense to people named this, but like Jessica. Oh man. Oh, Ashley. Oh my god.

Or Meg. Let's not add not down the list aren't you what's wrong with Jessica yeah I nothing's wrong with Jessica rabbit it's just a common name so it's like you know you say oh what's Jessica doing it's like which Jessica whenever says Barbara There. Arrested, Crystal Pepsi-nee? That was fast. Thank you, Jason Rugby for saving my stupid joke. I don't know if save is the right word. He made it funnier.

You had that for a stupid joke, maybe. I'm gonna say my name is really unusual, but I really like it. The biggest problem I have with my name is when I order takeout, like people say, you know, you go through your order and they're like, and what's your name? Because they want to know what name to put it under. I feel like people don't expect a one syllable name. Like, what's your name?

Gus. What? Gus, Justin? No. My name is Gus. Just. No. It's impossible. Why don't you say Gustavo? Because that's even worse.

Is it? I feel like in Texas that would be pretty common. How many other fucking Gustavo's do you know? None. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know very many people outside this company though. There is a Gus who... There is. Yeah. He does some stuff here every now and then. Volunteer. But there's no other Barbara. Yeah. And they probably won't be unless we hire one and like accounting or someone or something. 50 something. I would say it

could be worse. It could be like mildred. It's true. But then people call me Millie. And Millie made that cool. So I'd be okay. That play. Why don't you make Barbara cool? I'm sorry. I'm okay. I forgot. Oh, that's why I'm not. I'm okay with it. You know, because as it lacks the originality, no one ever fucks up my name. You know, I call it Jones. Okay. No one ever was harder to spell that. It's like, if you ask me, how do you spell that, you're saying, how do I spell? Yeah, because you really, this is the one way to spell Jones.

I have to spell free all the time, and it's because people expect it to be spelled with. Oh, with like an eye or something stupid shit. I'd say F-O-E and they're like, oh, yeah, I guess that makes sense. Yeah. So when they ask how to spell it, do you just say like free, like the word free? I'd just say F-O-I-W.

That's more work to explain it than you just say for letters. Yeah, I have to spell my name every single time. Well, you have the whole ELLE debate, too. Yeah, it's true. No one ever gets right. It's EL. The common. Brian Duckelman fucked it up for us because his is LE.

Duckelman. Also, the way it sounds, it should be LE, but somewhere down the line. Yeah, you really kicked the English language in the dick with that one. Yeah, and Barbara too. English language in the dick with that one. And Barbara too, people always do a Barbara. Barbara. Well, Barbara Streisen ruined that for you as well. Yeah.

Because she spells it in her BR-A. She's the only one that she does. She spells it. She spells it. She spells it. Barbara, like a fucking asshole. I didn't. Barbara.

Shut up. What? What? What's that? That's spelled. I'm with you. Yeah, but it's Barbara. That's the name. It's Barbara. It's Barbara.

It is if you're a performer. Full name. Barbara. Barbara. Keep saying my name. It's a word nice. Barbara. Do you like what people say on a name?

Yeah. Everyone does. I've seen it. I have no connection to it. That's like that. It's probably the guy over there. It's probably the guy over there. I literally, this is actually really funny, being a research teeth.

Like I grew up learning if someone's yelling the name Michael in public nine and a ten times, it's not me, you know. So they go into the mall, people are yelling at their kids and shit all the time. So I'd be a teenager and someone's like Michael and I would never turn around ever. Now like rooster teeth, you know, people see us out at Walmart or whatever, you know, I getting food somewhere. It's pretty common people that, you know, yell our names and we're like, oh, can I get a picture or whatever. So now more than ever, people yell Michael and I always look around like, it's a damn it. Because I think maybe it's a fucking fan

or something. And I'm just always caught looking around and I see some three year old running around with his mom chasing. I'm like, no, no, yeah, oh, no, it wasn't me. It looks about right. Or vice versa. I will ignore it, but no, totally is some random person yelling my name out. And they're like, it's just chasing me across the parking lot. Because before it was, I don't know anybody here, but now it's like anyone could do me. So now I'm just on alert at all times.

Yeah. At all times. But you don't like Mike. No one calls him Mike. No, I don't know I just never went by that Mike do all that Mickey No or Micah's

Micu is Mickey a nickname for Michael. Yeah, hey, maybe I never heard that Michael mouse Yeah What was this for the people I'm a dad? They don't last bad my crystal It wasn't funny People have been asked by my crystal pebbles in the middle. I'm not going to do that. I know. So it wasn't funny. It was not funny. Well, to my everyday guests. Gavin, I'm happy with him.

I had to apologize to Lindsay Gray Miles and Carrie this weekend, because almost every single person that would come up to the booth if I was there, they would make a pun. Or ask for a pun. Or mention pun. Did you have puns on standby? Like a list? I did. I always bring a few with me to have in the back of my mind, in case anyone asked me to write one or say something. I like the extra research that you put into attending events. It's no one else has to do. Well, it's not, I don't take no one, but it's like per character, right? We're like like how for Barbara. She has to keep puns on hand Just to draw a lot of dicks on things right for me. It's usually like an on-the-fun message or if it'll either be a message or like for something The sign that'll just be like oh just right whatever and for me is like or you know last me sign it for my friend Chris

But like to go fuck himself or whatever you want like in place of Barbara's puns I have creative ways to tell people's friends that they're losers because they're not here and their friends are here. But it's usually, you know, like, you can tell them to go fuck himself or something like that's fine. He loved that. If you write that on there. It's like the kid we saw at New York Comic Con 2011 again, the little French kid with

his dad who's just like, you do rage quit. He's like, you're gonna yell at my son? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, more, more, more. He's just like, all right, guy. I was like, the seven year old boy. He was like, he's like, he's like, he's doing it. He's like, he's like, a little flaggy with a little wave

and he was like, I can imagine him as like the little team America puppet within the puppet show. It's kind of thing like a tiny little like that. That's how I remember it. It gets more like that every time. Did you look at any French into your yelling or do you not know any French?

No, I did not. I did not work any French into it. What's your thing? Like when people ask you to do something at a con or a event. I get the video message thing a lot, but it's just like me being nice and not yelling on the phone. Do you mean it? No, I'm not boring.

I don't know why, but the thing sometimes people will say like oh my friend couldn't be here can you tell him he's a piece of shit? Yeah, I don't know why you want me to tell me all get that sometimes people ask me to do the the ring the message noise The text is yeah, oh the burden on this is definitely a lot of people asked us to say hello to their friends like in our characters voices And I'm just like I'm just guess I'm just gonna talk just says normal You're full, but usually it was for Ruby. We had a big Ruby Fanfall you should start shutting people down be like fuck you watch x-ray and bath Fuck your Ruby cosplay. No offense. There was a cost there. There was a cost customer who had made her own orp and had like a bluetooth speaker in it And she recorded me saying like one of the orp lines and then she played it back in the bluetooth speaker coming out of orp

Like I was just like that is so cool. That's like You steal it. I want it. I would just take it and be like Legally, this is mine like really you have my soul in it. You're at our booth This like our own country. You usually take propery. In national waters. Right. Yeah, she was pretty tell.

She came as a velvet from Ruby, Hilda, and Orr one day, and then I forget what the last one was. She was really good. That's always the craziest too. Like our fans are so nuts, They don't just show up in cosplay They have a different cosplay for every day and from all of our show time. It's fucking nuts Like from all the animated shows you're like people came as you guys you're looking at dressed and go to the convention Like I'm there in clothes. I think so. I'd be okay every time like I remember RTX. I don't know how many people were telling me like

Oh, just wait till I see what I what I. And I was like, I'm gonna change my t-shirt. You know, I mean the undies are from today so they're good. It's really impressive. Like one of my favorite pictures ever is all of the, I think it might have been MCM in London or something. They were like 10 different X-ray and Vavs like all in the line, X-ray, Vav, X-ray, Vav. Yeah. It was wicked. It was like, oh my God. There's even more now, especially now that the animated shows out.

Yeah. Well, dude, it was like, I mean, as far as people making cosplays and with our fan base, I don't know her full name, but I've seen her on Twitter, like a million times, but Naomi, she makes all those cosplays. And I think, like, one of the first ones she did was X-ray and Vav, but she, there was the whole thing

with Alan Richardson in the Mac and Cheese. She made a fucking Mac and cheese cosplay and like 24 hours from the extreme. Like it was maybe maybe a day later. It's like I have to say it's a toe of mac and cheese out thing. I have to believe she just has like an her own craft store or something where she gets that Do you think she's got like two sewing machines and can she like use them both at the same time like each hand sewing different things maybe she just hired some some children There's going to be someone who can do that. Like so two different things. Well, that was like a guy who could write two different,

he could write in two different languages at the same time. With each hand. Does he have two brains? How do you do that? That's crazy. I think it may have been a side effect of a different illness, but it was like one of those awesome side effects. Holy shit.

Yeah, it must be the kind of thing where it's like the two hemispheres of his brain don't communicate. Yeah. It's like they can each operate independently. I can't even play the piano with two hands. Like I can't do something different with one hand and the other, you know, like, rub and pat. Yeah, try it.

Rub and pat? Yeah, pat your head and rub your stomach. And I'm leaving my hand on my head. There was a stomach padding at the beginning. I did it. Or like it wasn't the thing where it's like you have to put your foot in a counter-clockwise and try to draw six and you can't do it. Oh yeah.

Then your foot starts moving in like a six. Yeah. It's kind of interesting when your brain makes decisions. That. No, I mean finish. I can finish to laugh at him. He'll get nervous. Like say to something there, and I reach for it,

sometimes I reach with one hand, sometimes I'll go for both. I don't ever decide. I'll take it with two hands today. But like it always happens in a different way, you know? Nope. I was like almost with you at the beginning. Like then you went off. Like sometimes you pick up some with your hands.

Yeah. If it's heavy maybe? Yeah. I don't know where you're going for here. I don't even. You started with the brain and I was gonna apply it to you. Ryan's been playing with the Vive for like the last two months. Time thing is incredible.

Maybe month. It is incredible. Like the Oculus is cool. The Vive is like. Next level. is cool. The vibe is like, next level. I'm here. That is the first time I've done VR stuff where I know for a fucking fact

I'm standing in a cheaman hunter. And my body's like, whoa, careful, you're gonna fall down a hole. Yeah, we have a- I'm like stupid body. I'm like, this is one way where you shrink into the room, you're in and then you're in a shelf and you're just looking around.

It's like, whoa, I almost fell off the shelf. Yeah. Oh no, I didn't. It's amazing how quickly your brain ignores the truth and it just gets. It's like your mind wants you to believe. We had David over there tried out earlier today and he did the portal one where like you expand the robot. Yeah, open you up to repair it and he would not walk through it. It's like the time when you walk around to go to this, I was like, you know, you can just

walk right through it. It's totally the future of gaming. We, uh, we had Fruit Ninja on it. We're trying that out. Yeah. Uh, uh, frigging awesome. Jeff, Jeff was playing it within like 10 seconds, you know, because it was only, you only used one sword in the game and some, some of the five stuff to use to, there's like little

nunchuck type things. Um, but for Fruit Ninja, you only use one within like 10 seconds because there's fruit flying everywhere, Jeff's chopping and he kept trying to hit the fruit with his left hand. Your brain is just like oh shit, shit, you're really doing it. It's really cool. You can like chop through it and then at some point I was trying to mess with it, like try and do different stuff. So I was like, what if I can skew at one of these pieces of fruit? So I just went like, and I got stuck on the end of my sword. I was like, this is like, how is this? I was like, I'm like, the flat of the blade.

Yeah, and then I started to make a cabab that was like skewering all this stuff. I got like three on it. Yeah, do it again. And then when I was done with that, I started ignoring the fruit and I was like, I'm gonna commit Sepulchoo. So I like twisted the knife friend.

I was like, I really don't want to do this. I was like, I don't like it. I was like, I like it. I had to convince myself that it was okay because I was like, oh, it's getting really cool. And I just did it. I just went, and I kind of like, I felt something. That feels weird to shove a sword into my stomach.

Even so weird. Even in the sense I was already fascinated by it. In the way we make videos videos already like things to do And stuff like that because to start the game There's a floating watermelon in front of you and you have to slice it and the game starts But like I was saying you can hit it with the blunt end and if you hit it with the blunt end The watermelon will just fall and the game won't start so Right after I played it once the the first thing I started doing was you can whack the watermelon from underneath and it'll fly over your head.

There's like 30 feet of a dojo behind you. It doesn't exist in real life. It just goes. It doesn't lead at all. Everything's in front and it's just all that. It happens to look at it. I literally, probably for three minutes, was hitting this watermelon and then turning my head around just to see how far it went. I'm like, this is fun. Trying to hit it in an imaginary space.

So he told me that. And then of course, I was like, oh, yeah, fuck yeah, I gotta do that. So that's all I did. It was like, it's fucking fun, right? I didn't get to try that one yet. So the future of gaming is that, with also feet, like you should be able to kick shit. You should just have a glove for picking up stuff.

But how will your brain know whether to use one glove or two gloves? Shut up. And also, there should be like a body suit that has little force feedback So if you get hit by something, we like or you put a sword in it like if you have that if you have like glove legs Feedback and the ability for other people to appear in your virtual world where they are based on how it Is the future of gaming. Yeah, if you get a laser and a shield laser beam future of gaming yeah if you get a laser and a shield although I am I am worried that the whole argument about how video games make people do mental stuff it's only going to get worse

when video games are that realistic because people gonna have dreams or they they won't know what's real or the thing that scares me was like a imagine like a natively developed PT or like a horror game I would not play it terrifying just don't believe it. I mean terrifying. Just in the in the portal thing when I think it's atlas, it's Atlas, you people, I remember one of them busted comes in. It's fucking huge, right? Like Atlas is probably and he's like the short one. Yeah. He's probably six foot at least. That's the thing is that you know that scale when you're just looking at TV. Right, and then fucking glados comes up at the end, and it's just like the head part,

like that, you know, part that's on the arm and it zooms in. It's gotta be 10 feet tall. Like standing in the room, you're looking up. Every time I watch someone play it, you know, I know glados comes in because Gavin's like this, like at the fucking scene. And they take a step back. Yeah, it's like holy shit, thank you.

I watched the floor drops out in that, and I watched Gavin jump, because at the fucking scene. And they take a step back. Yeah. It's like, holy shit. I watched the floor drops out in that, and I watched Gavin Jump, because the floor started dropping. Oh. P.T. Absolutely would shit my pants. I don't know how to say that. I honestly would play it.

I would play it in filmin' and I'd probably wet myself. I just, I just need a way. I would just need a way to get me to like walk down that corridor. You, I absolutely believe people with like, heart conditions and shit would drop dead, like if seeing that stuff in real life like for sure And it's so annoying to try and explain like you really have to try it like it's it when you never gonna do it Just this by talking about it. It's so easy. I like real life

It's like I instantly forget that there's actual physical stuff around me I would constantly walk into a box or something. Oh, yeah, I'm in a cheap amount damn it I'm starting playing the first time he used it, and I slowly started moving things closer and closer to him, and then Jeff started doing it. So by the end, he walked forward and was like, what? What?

Yeah, I, what have you done? I was even a fool. I was literally in a, in a circle, probably about the size of his feet. But he could stand there. Do you guys have the underwater one, too, with the sunken shape of the whale? We do.

I'm gonna try that one. It's good. Ryan's got him all, he's like a good drug deal. He's like, what do you need? I got it. Pulse it out. I really want to try surgery. Yeah?

Get it or performing. Both. No, I want to, okay, imagine if you could, you could wear the thing, it takes your height into consideration and it just projects a naked body. Maybe get rid of the penis just for PG. And then you could just get a scalp one, you could just like,

no that's the first step. You're not the penis. Actually, I'm gonna take that a step in a different slightly different direction. You're gonna make fun of me at the same time. No, no, no, it's good. You had your wisdom teeth out. Imagine if when they gas you,

they put a VR headset on. And then you're just like, fucked up out of your mind. Just like not know what's going on It's like oh my god. That should actually be like a flight to my inner world. Like just flying like Or just swimming underwater. There's a whale we can eat. I want that now. I would go to the dentist. I can't go into the dentist. I would go to the dentist if they get you fucked up and then put a VR headset on you Yeah It's like you're a giant tooth You're being removed by your brain mouth. Yeah

It's like rainbows If you guys did searching simulator with VR that would be really entertaining That would be entertaining you should make it so educational Like if they don't do learning with this thing, it's a massive waste of up. This reminds this whole discussion reminds me, I'm just getting into Ready Player One, the book. And this whole discussion reminds me of Oasis. I have not ready yet. I'm probably going to start tomorrow on that book. Okay. I just finished rereading class or re-listening to Clasher Kings today, so before I move on to Feast for Crows, I'll probably stick Ready Player One in there.

I think I made a movie out of that. Yes, I think Spielberg's attached to that. Okay, that makes sense. So here I got one more thing to read. I want to thank our friends over at WarbyParker.com. WarbyParker makes high quality stylish frames for prescription glasses. Awesome glasses start at $95 Compared to similar similar

Let's take that over compared to similar quality boutique brand frames itself for $300 or more Warby Parker also has a free home trion program. That's really cool You get to go to their website choose five pairs of frames and they send in to you so you can try them on and decide which ones You like best. I've got them right here So they sent you the box and you've got five pairs of glasses. I'll show them to you a little more in depth right now. So for every pair of glasses you purchase, Warri Parker sends a pair to someone in need. So make sure to tweet and comment on which pair you like the most.

So try Warri Parker out for yourself. See how good you look into frames. Go to WarriParker.com slash roeth, and get free three day shipping on your final frame selection. It's Warbeaparker.com slash Rooster Teeth. So when we did, so I've got the five-dream frame chair that I wanted to try on, and when we did the sponsor supplementary podcast last week, I was showing some photos from my phone, and people saw in the roll me with these glasses on and I saw people posting on the website like, what the fuck are these photos? and it was like me wearing the glasses like that, I got some funny ones and then like a dweeb. A smart dweeb. By other dweeb glasses it will be pocket at call see someone whistle those are nice

I have no idea who so they are not since they're just a trial once they're not prescription so I can't see anything No, I just can't affect them wearing glasses. Okay, where what? Uh sure, we'll try that on a pet. I want those ones. That's much more glasses for those I guess Michael throw me something. Yeah, there you go Oh, I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm you go Oh, I'm so when I was when I was distinguished here when I was younger I used to want to wear cool Gavin. Yep You do look good in those actually Michael Think you have a small head width You think my head got smaller. No, I'm saying it's more than that. Oh, so I don't have any this much dross over here probably. Oh, those look good on your barber. Thank you. I used to watch glasses when I was a kid. I think because I thought they looked

good. The ones I'm going to end up getting I think I think that would be the ones that you've got on gave. I think with some more sunglasses. Those look good. But even the ones I'm wearing right now actually not to think about it. The prescription glasses I have on these are also war be Parker. So you could get these if you wanted. You can look like that. That's a gas model. This is the gas. Cosplay gas No, don't cut to me. I mean that's cool. Cut to the white You're my gossip. You're good in old glasses or is that just a fluke? Why you think I look good in these? Shut up. Are you looking at me or Michael Gavin put these on? Okay, give me this Okay, thanks. Oh

My god, that was so loud It was knocked to truth though. That has it is You look like Harry Potter. You look like deal like a deal with it gif You want me to look like a deal with it? These are not or be practical competitor Actually look fake it's with I know Someone sent these like a year ago. You look a lot smarter Gavin.

It's not true. But I can see. Oh, well according to my calculations. You look like a British nerd. You look like a Harry Potter. Right? He does. They're not even the same glasses, but somehow the glasses pull out the Harry Potter

ness of your face. Abracadabra. That's not what he says. What does he say? Kinda linga. Excessive things. Excessive things. Yeah, give me those glasses back.

I'm gonna trade these on. I gotta return them so I can get the glasses. These are the most personal books. Yes, my personal books. You get in trouble if we trash these. Yes, I will get in trouble if I trash those. Do it. Trash them.

Break his glasses. Don't break my glasses. It's like, how those words have to come out of your mouth. Do not break my glasses. Don't break my glasses. Don't do it. My mom's going to be so mad. My glasses. Thanks for pointing at how I'm telling my son.

I like these. Just look good. If you get glasses, do you have pervison? I do. Oh my God. No, I'm so you get glasses, do you have perfect vision? I do. Oh my god, no I have. Oh, I'm so sorry. No, because I want glasses.

You can win glasses. You'd have to have bad eyes. It's so good. But we're in fucking glasses for like four years. I know that you can't win glasses if you don't need them. That's and you're called a ballette. It's their poster. Again, the guy he's been doing it.

He's a hipster. Well, Bernie used to need glasses, so it became part of his look. So he's allowed to do that. That's bullshit. It's been doing it. He's a hipster. Well, Bernie used to need glasses. So it became part of his look So he's allowed to do that bullshit. He's been for no Could not be part of his look if he had stopped wearing it Do you have contacts now? Yeah, okay back and forth. Yeah, so I remember you know one of those people you can do both like Like you do you do both you don't look weird with that glasses. Let's cuz I wear them both enough, but you look weird Let's cuz Gus never ever ever ever takes his glasses off. Yeah, that's crazy when he does with him off. No

It's like a shirt to him do it. I'll take him off absolutely. Don't cut to me It is part of your look, but it's a permanent It is part of your look, but it's a permanent. You gotta get as much between the face and other people as possible. It's like glasses, masks, whatever, makeup, everything. Yeah, I gotta hide as much of this as I can. Just like one of those big covers at Subway. One of the ones? Those like spit guards, if they have it Subway or in a tank shop.

Does it drive anyone else crazy when you're like at a salad bar or a subway or whatever. And people reach over the fucking glass. Till I point at that. How far do I want that? Like, you could just say what it is. You know what? What you don't know the name. It's labeled.

It's all in here. You're in America. Here's the thing. I'll even combat that. So there's a doughnut shop near where I just moved. I just moved in the house. And there's a doughnut shop near that passing the way to moved. I just moved into the house. And there's a donut shop near that pass on the way to work.

So I go there fairly often. They have delicious collaches and donuts and such. There are many, many donuts in which names I don't know. Like twit, there's like twisty not donuts. And there's some that have a bunch of shit on it. I literally, every day literally go. Give me that one that's like doing that. She knows what it is, okay.

I don't get up like go back and point at it. There's like 800 donuts there, and I go, give me the curly one. She's like, yeah, okay, four rows over, got it. I gotta say that when I'm there, you should know. I'm agreeing with you. You shouldn't have to like touch it, okay? No, like Ariana Grande fucking lickin' it.

What? You should not see the video of her licking donuts. No. I guess it was like surveillance video. Like she went to some donut shop and there were donuts out on the display. And I guess they she ordered donuts and when like the person working there turned around to bag up their order. She like started looking the donuts that were out there. Like did she pick it up and like no, just like it was on the tray and I yeah like that.

That she just started like looking the donuts that were out there. Do you think like if you're a big celebrity, would you do that kind of shit just for fun? And then she also said, I hate America. I hate Americans. You didn't hear this. No. What's she from? I just go America.

Oh. I have one. Did you hear about this? No, I had no idea. I think you're the only one. I have a, I have a donut like you said. I'm so gay. Told me fan. I'm told me now. I want to see it.

It's on donutlickers.com. Don't go there. I have no idea what that is. Oh god. I'm guaranteed that's not good. That's got to be a way to say it. Oh, that's not donutlickers.com that you're showing. Yeah, she just licked it.

But she was just kind of like tasting some of the sugar. No, they're licking donuts. She hates America. Yeah. What a weirdo. And Americans. And you. So you're fine. Sorry. Yeah, I get by. That was a lot of crap in those. Like if you ever get a free bird's or

Chipotle. It's a crap that's like you can put on your food that I don't know what it's called. Yeah, same with the pico. I didn't know how that was. I'm just like, give me the colorful. Pico's awesome. What is it? What is it? What is it? It's like rooster something. Some do the rooster. It's like, it's awesome. Give me the colorful. Peacock is awesome. What is it? It's like rooster something. Something with the rooster. It's Diced Tomatoes, Spaniards. What is that in English? It's like the rooster's beak.

Rooster's beak. Yeah, but it's like, yeah, Diced Tomatoes, Diced Onions, cilantro, jalapeno. Yeah. Load me up with Peacock. It's really good. I thought you just said you didn't like it. What?

Did I? No, I did. He may have agreed or not. I don't like tomatoes and I don't like cilantro so that makes sense and cilantro is More goop I don't like coriander is that what you're calling yeah, it's a stuff that some people have there it is Some weird like genetic thing that makes it taste like soap. Yeah, I've heard of that. Yeah, maybe I have that Yeah, I've heard of that. Yeah, maybe I have that. What's the thing with?

What do you like to do? What do you like to do? What do you like to do? What's up? Arugula. Arugula. The only time I can eat pico is when it's in queso and it's like eating queso. Pico to queso.

Yeah. Great. Was that roostis cheese? Was that, was that, was that, was that, it's the bico cheese pie? You just made that up. Bico cheese. Yeah. No, I know, I was just trying to try this. But like, the case was fine,

but it's gotten a little like, like aftertaste. That's what I like from Pepeo. It's like a strong bitter taste. Yeah, it's like I just had some delicious cheese and chips and then ate a piece of grass. Mm, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

So good. You guys have a different way to make this grass. You don't like grass? People off camera don't like grasp apparently It's weird to me like stuff like that that You know we don't know but that some people taste cilantro differently than other people It's makes you wonder about like all the experiences everything that you feel and you see and you experience in your life That you think is normal might not be normal like you might be the only person experiencing that like I mean call

It's the same way. There's just no way of knowing. Like, this guy could be green to everyone else. I recently watched a whole bunch of videos of people trying these glasses that correct color blindness and then seeing like real colors for the first time. How do they know it worked? Because everything's really vibrant all of a sudden.

And they could distinguish like, this flower, this color is in this his flowers before it looked the same. I was so much for being a photo of Barack Obama pointing over the scar that your poll is true. He is allowed. He could do whatever the fuck he wants. Yeah, it looks like it's your poll. If I ate something that Obama touched,

I would be pretty happy about it. Like, he put his finger in this. I think he's pointing at it. He put his finger in this. He's pointing it right rice Give me that substance. Oh Would you let Obama do a lot more to you than a regular? What does that mean? Like sexually like what do you mean do more to me like what if he like you want to hug me? Sure What if he like hugged me licked his finger and then like put it on your mouth. Why would he do that? That's incredible. Someone else.

You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera.

You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. You can't see it on camera. Thanks to detainant 100 if he wanted to lick his finger and go in my mouth maybe but I'd ask him why

Like you know, Jason probably he's probably pretty clean Like I'm sure he has people take care of him like he has to be clean, you know, probably wash his hands for him Do you do you think we've ever had a president? Oh there it is Do you think we've ever had a president? Oh, there it is It's like do you think we've ever had a president with like bad personal hygiene and like no one can tell him that like he smells bad Probably I mean it's like Washington probably smell like shit Right, I'm sure everyone else at the time so bad. I'm probably like comparatively okay comparatively I'm probably right. There's probably some stinking ones in there. I think about that sometimes like I'll see like a painting Yeah, like the signing of the declaration of independence like

July and Philadelphia the founders of a nation signing this historic document and I think How bad that that room smell yeah, it's like all these No AC but wearing those goddamn wigs and that powder probably like 10 years Deodorant doesn't exist Stinkiest painting in the world do you think anyone fight as they signed it? yeah for sure

it's probably good even to suffer with it probably did on purpose it's just to just to tell the story I've already when I signed it new country no big deal why is the

why is the worst time that someone fired in history? Well, do you think anyone ever met the queen and fired just by a shot? Oh, it has to happen, right? Just from being nervous, maybe. Do you think you shake the keys in? I don't know. How do you greet the queen? I know. You were the one that said that like, you know, there's like a whole you have to be far away and you have to be far away. Yeah, if you like approach the queen Like if she nights you you don't like shaker fucking hand, right? Probably break it. Oh, you're not if you're being knight You're usually knelt down might be ahead till it. I'm just saying who meets the queen

It just goes oh, oh, and shakes her hand. I think a lot of people who shake the head of the queen It will be the thing that happens that often where people fart while she's doing it I'm just saying it's probably only shakes the hand of like really important people right? Well people get nervous Really important people fart too Especially everyone fart, but that will be like the queen thinks she gets nervous meeting other people She's like I don't give a shit. I don't care She probably if anything because she gets get she probably shits herself while she shakes someone's hands. She's like Like I did it on purpose

Like I did on purpose Kevin Kevin brought us here I brought you near there You pulled up to the front door Because I got out Do you think anyone will tell the queen what you just said? Hopefully You won't believe this

Michael Johnson America said the most inappropriate thing about it Don't ruin my chances of getting knighted, alright? It could happen one day It won't for what? I don't know. I might go on to do great things. You might go on. I don't know that you go on from here to do great things

that gets you knighted, but then she goes, well, wait a minute, you were on a podcast or someone said, I shit my pants. You're out of here. I don't really know. That's gonna give you trouble. I have a day, I think you have a shot. I'll be like, my bad. Sorry you didn't get knighted because I said the queen might shit herself.

She's old. They probably happens anyway. Probably fucking sneaks out. Do you ever think she's on the toilet taking a dump? Oh no. And she's just like, I'm mad. I'm the queen taking a shit right now. I would. But I'm not the queen, so I don't know.

It'd be cool if she was. It'd be cool if she was like tweeting all the time. Do you think it's an actual throne? An actual porcelain throne. But the president must do it too. This is my first shit as the president is definitely done. We actually, I don't remember. We talked about presidential shits once on the podcast. It rings a bell. We talked about whether or not the the secrets like to hide his DNA, the secret service had to shit at the same time. And like I'll flush the toilet simultaneously.

Yeah, a second shitter. Yeah, terrorists could not intercept the presidents. They've intercepted the package. We had someone. We don't know what to do with this. They're just on the podcast. That'd be like a sweet Jason Boren scene, like five special agents chasing someone down, who's running away with a turd and a paper bag.

You're gonna be a briefcase. It wouldn't be a bag. Yeah, they'd probably have a deal. They'd come up with shit. It would be one of those cryogenic briefcases. And the other guy would be down at Battery Park in New York like, hey, you want to buy some presents for shit? Yeah.

No, the guys, he's like, I got a bunch. It's all from the president. like, I got a bunch. She hits all from the president. Everyone, I got 50 shits on me. Or just past president shits, he's just frozen. Yeah, which president you want? The older ones are green and they're red. Boba, mama.

I can knock off that. This is totally knock off shit. All right, well, what's about time to wrap up? You got to wrap it up? Get a wrap of your podcast? We did not talk about the Red vs Blue DVD. Talk about the DVD. I got something to throw out, too.

That comes out on Tuesday, right? Tomorrow. What's shut is this? If you're watching this live, it comes out tomorrow. Otherwise, it's out already. Neptune shirt from Ruby. That's, I think, in our store already. Or just a ton.

Neptune, that's, I know him. that's I know him carry you got the blu-ray I've got the sun shirt on look zoom in on my sun shirt by that one too Neptune and son BFF BFC's of 13 tomorrow and the soundtrack soundtrack is music by trucker and David Levy and there's another shirt coming out this week that I don't think we talk about yet that I'm excited there's 42 tracks on this soundtrack. You were shocked at the value there. That is crazy value. If you found 42 tracks on the floor, you'd pick it up.

But it bill gates. There you go. Yeah, so all that stuff is out now. Check it out. Can I have this one? T store. Can you have that? I think so. He's taking it.

Sure. Take it. Dude, get this. So I'm going to throw it out here right before the this one? Can you have that? I think so. He's taking it. Dude, get this. I'm going to throw it out here right before the podcast is over. Gus. Hit me. I'm going to do a podcast. You're going to do a podcast. She might 100 podcasts. She might 100 podcasts. Gavin will be there sometimes. Right? Oh, yeah. I'll be somewhere here on a different set. That's right on a different set. Yeah. Well, I don't want this old thing What is that for me? I have brand new soon Barbara okay soon like a couple weeks I took it I took a cheeky peek at the set. Oh, did you I haven't looked at it looks cheeky. It looks pretty cool

I Looked up some pictures, and I said hey make it look like this. So you know I'm jealous. Yeah, it's cool It should be fun. It should be a fun set Yeah, so yeah, look for you got that to look for too. Yeah, look forward to Wasting your time with that. What are you talking about video games? We'll talk about video games. We'll talk about beer How many people know is is how many people are gonna have on at a time? Probably three to four with a spot for a fifth in case we need a guest

Thank people will enjoy it. So look out for that. If you like this podcast and podcasts, like it, when's it out? I barber just asked and I said I didn't know. What's it going to be called? Next few weeks. This is my hair podcast. To be determined, but you'll find out when it comes out, but probably not the achievement

of your podcast. Ah, podcast. That's an idea that I'll listen to you right now crystal pepsiny Crystal pepsiny turn off Gus's mic. I totally blew out the mic there. All right. Well, thanks for watching everyone We'll see you guys next week. Bye. I love you. Hey, that's my leg 1 tbc 1 tbc 1 tbc 1 tbc 1 tbc 1 tbc

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