Rooster Teeth Podcast - The Just Had Sex Look - #414

Episode Date: February 7, 2017

RT Discusses Flushing Condoms Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's time to put your pedal to the metal. From the twisted minds behind Deadpool and Zombieland, an executive producers, Will Arnett and Anthony Mackie comes the new Peacock original series, Twisted Metal, a high-oxane action comedy based on the classic video game series. Anthony Mackie stars as John Doe, a motor-mouthed outsider who must deliver a mysterious package across a post-apocalyptic wasteland.

If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnett, and Thomas Hayden Church, twisted metal, streaming now, only only on peacock. Oh, you're... Ah! Hello! What's up? Welcome to the Rooster Teeth podcast. I am Brandon. I'm Chris. I'm John. And I'm Todd. Who's up? Welcome to the Rooster Teeth podcast. I am Brandon. I'm Chris. I'm John and I'm Todd Who's Todd wait wait wait?

Let's want to say real quick this episode of the receipt podcast is brought to you by me undies Sherry's berries and pro flowers. Yeah, who the fuck is Todd? He's another bald white dude that we've made friends with too much testosterone boys Sorry about that. So which is every morning, is that mirror? Is that what makes you go, isn't that what? testosterone makes you go bald, is that it? Is that why I have so much hair? Too much. Too much testosterone.

Does it make your balls bigger or smaller? I'm bigger, right? You can't make your balls, because mine gets small when I don't take my medicine. Wait, really? Yeah. Yeah, there's a fluctuation in size when I don't take my medicine. Like, is? Yeah. Yeah, there's a fluctuation in size when I don't take my medicine.

Like, is it like a quick thing or like an extended? Like a testosterone injection. Sorry, I brought it up. No, it's fine. It's a normal thing to have brought it up on the podcast for, but yeah, there's fluctuation in size. Can you just do a fluctuation?

Like, could you set up like a GoPro in a time lapse? Just so you could watch it. Yeah, I'm just gonna sit. Yeah, and just go, bro. Put a little hand clock in the background, too. You can just have one place once a day where you take one picture. Like those, those photos that you will take.

Like, you know, like one picture every day and you see people age and stuff. And you see your balls shrinking. Yeah, I just hope you don't get. How big of a, I'm not giving you any sort of details on size, but I will say there is a noticeable difference Oh almost like okay, I will say I can I can put it into terms that would make sense to you What's the size difference between

jumping into a cold pool and Just after having sex 24 will that sense that's a big difference right? Wait a little Chris wait. What is what is this represent? Is this a literal measurement? To a metric, sure. And how do you measure it? Do you use a protractor or something? I mean, what's the...

Gotta go to the testicle store. Yeah, it's what's those things that people use to like, to like check how much fat content you have, it's those things. Oh yeah, that right in there. It's not a caliper, is it? Yeah, it's caliper. It's caliper.

It's caliper. Todd, Todd, with the testicle, speaking of which. Oh no, a mind y. Yeah, it's caliper. It's caliper. It's caliper. Todd, Todd, with the fantastical speaking of which. Oh no, Mindjole show. That's great. Pleasant naming show. Pleasant naming show. What do you know? What do you know?

What do you know? Well, the question mark. Possibly question mark. We're undecided. That's what you know. That's what you know. Mindjole edition. In the episode's in.

As the show's airing, we're still undecided about the question mark. Then that itself would dictate a question mark. No, it doesn't. No. No, it's a half question mark. It's like, wait, what? Maybe explain to me grammatically how a sentence that says what do you know make sense

without a question mark. Here's like, what do you know? Oh, but I still think that's a question. Yeah, I know, it's more of a statement. John would be right and that's too big for us. Thank you. I've always liked Todd. So Todd worked on barely pliical YouTube channel.

Yeah, I've been on YouTube before. I worked on at barely political, a very large YouTube channel. And then I bailed and I moved to Austin. Yeah, and then he sets up and then we set up and then we made a thing. Nine months later, we made a thing. One slater. Yeah, you got to work with Chris a lot, right? Demaris?

Who? Not sure, but I did. You were on the thing. I did actually. Because one of my roles on the show was, which is shows, there's some great episodes. You should really check it out. I don't know which camera switch but There's only 17 cameras. Yeah, I did actually we switched out my layoff for on the spot

And my my camera moved and then Friday when I did my intro and I I'm supposed to look right the camera and say I'm your host I'm rising or I was looking at the wrong cameras so like that's just, I was kind of like looking just a little bit to the right of the me camera. You're like, awkward, where there's people who like don't look you in the eye. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And nice to meet you. My name's like two lazy guys. I feel like I need to shake your hand.

You put your hand at me. I'm John Reisinger on the host of On the Spot. That's actually pretty accurate to me. Reach it out. Constantly like looking at the other camera when they got to you. Yeah. Can we talk about hand shakes? Yeah. They're the worst, right?

Oh yeah, my thing is, God, I would find it there. You can detect a hand shake, and I think Patrick, I believe Patrick noticed this when Gus and I first interviewed him. You can detect when the hand shake is gonna come up, right? I have a move. It's a stand up and a slow back away.

Cause I don't wanna touch your hands. What are you back away from a handshake? Yeah, no, it's not a like step, step, step thing. It's not like it's just like a handshake, and you're like, whoa. It's making the person feel uncomfortable by greeting them to initiate the handshake. Oh no, no, no, not a great, a great your stock.

You got no option. Are you guys all anti-handshake? No, no, no, I'll tell you, I'll tell you where, you have no problem with it? I have no problemhanshakes? No, no, I'll tell you where you have no problem with it. I have no problem with the handshakes. I have a problem with the variance of handshakes and also the opportunity for things like hugs and fist bumps and all that kind of stuff.

I hate that there's not a standard that when like, there's nothing like, there's so many, like, oh, going in for a handshake and someone's like, what, going in for a hug or going for a handshake and someone's got a fist bump? Just terrible. It's about power. What's the situation?

Like at the wedding reception, right? We had agreed everybody and a lot of these like big tough guys came in, that were friends with my big tough father-in-law. And then when they came in, I was like, I am gonna meet them and exceed this handshake. So I met it and I was like full firm and like I have dainty hands.

I have like p-hands. And then you not only do that, you do the, this, which I'm gonna be like, I could rip your arm off. Which I'm gonna install. Does it make sense though? Yeah, no, like, okay, I will say yes. Handshakes, everyone should learn how to give a good handshake.

That's a normal thing. That's something that I noticed. We shake hands with a lot of people. When we go to cons and stuff like that, we shake hands or we're at parties and that kind of thing with industry things. Everyone should learn to make a good firm handshake. Aim for the hand, get a good grip,

do a couple of shakes and be done with that. I'm talking about like when you're just in a social gathering and you don't know what, what's the deal for this one? Are we all gonna be just going in for those, like the handshake into the hug, or we can do a little side hug, or we can do a handshake that then turns into like a slide

or something like that. Well, it's like the handshake and then the slide and then the snap. But if the snap goes wrong, you got no way out. You just gotta slowly walk away. And I'm talking about. Everything out, all of your tactics involved, you got no way out. You just got to slowly walk away, and I'm talking about- Everything out, all of your tactics involved, you're just walking away.

No, no, no, it's, you know what I'm talking about, like here, Chris, do the thing. Well, it's like this and we're like, Oh yeah, where it's people do, I hate whenever I'm out. That's too many things. That's confusing to me. I have a question for you, John.

Yeah, what? In addition to the size of your balls changing, does the strength of your handshake? very Like is there oh like like when someone loses their vision all their other senses get stronger No, I think he means like when I if I don't take my medicine does my you saying the way I'm Testosterently levels of testosterone impact the level of your handshake that's what up because you were saying because you're saying under wedding you were trying to aggressively handshake, right? It's true.

And so I was wondering if you, because when you have less testosterone, you're less aggressive, right? Right. So with that, affect your handshake. I guess maybe in a microwave, I don't think it goes from like, hey, Chris, to like,

hey, Chris, it doesn't go to that, but it's probably like, oh, no, it doesn't at all. I would say no, you're an idiot. It doesn't change at all. testosterone can affect like how much muscle mass I can like create at a quick time. In fact, like the stuff I take,

I'm told by every doctor's ever prescribed it to me, like this is stuff that people would pay money to get. This is basically like legal steroids. It's just, it's just constant traded testosterone. How do I get human growth hormone? I don't know. All I have is synthetic testosterone. I don't know how you get HG.

I just don't know, do I go to a gym? Yeah. And like I just strike up a conversation like, I don't even know how to get drugs. I don't either. The dark web. Muscle, muscleheads use the dark web. You'd have to, you'd have to ask for like, juice.

But no, but how friendly do I have to be with this person? Is it like a work your way up? Like, you know, you have to hang out a little bit, go to a movie, like I don't know. No, it's pretty, it's like, hey, you're a professional wrestler. We're new friends. I need a source for you, juice. I don't know any pro wrestlers.

I think you have to be like, I wanna get my wrestling to the next level. And then you like wink. And then you go, I actually have a question for Chris. You guys write a script that people can download. None of you guys have issues though with germs and handshakes. No. I'm not a big fan of poop. And I feel like there's just, let's poop. Let's make the connection there, Brandon.

Let's make the connection. Handshake to poop. No, like, yeah, that's just, that's just, that's just, that's just, that's just, that's just, that's just, that's just, that's just, that's just, that's just, that's just, that's just, fan of poop. And I feel like there's just, okay, let's poop. That's make the connection there, Brandon. Let's make the connection. Handshakes to poop. No, like, yeah, that's just, that's a thing.

That's like, there's a ton. There's just so much like fecal matter on hands. That's why you get sick if you go to, you know, you eat food at a place where people don't wash their hands. You get like what, dysentery? I know that. That's not right.

In the restrooms here, they don't have the soap. And a lot of places they have the soap, and you're supposed to actually wash your hands. These are on the soap. I'm just kidding. Is that how like soap doesn't exist? Like, you're not supposed to wash your hands, I think you wipe your butt.

Those Austin hipsters in their lack of soap. I have no idea what they've been doing. God, worry about yourself. Hey Brandon, you're married. Yes. You gonna have a kid someday? Mm, I suppose. I'm not saying you have to.

The idea is nice, but then we think about how much money that costs. It does. And like, there's stuff now we wanna do that we can't, you know, so we just got another dog, which I think it kind of fills that natural instinct to wanna have a kid and he's fucking crazy. So, yeah, a little doggy, a little Vader?

Yeah, a little Vader? Yeah, a little Vader had to go to the emergency room with him. What now? Emergency room. I was in a car with Brandon, we were going to lunch and he actually took a call from his veterinarian. Yes. And you know, when you're in the car

and somebody else is talking, you like have to hear their conversation. And he talked about the dogs pooping problems for like 15 minutes. Yeah. And we're like driving to love some of them. It was the serious problem. It was the serious problem.

When you have like diarrhea on your carpet, it's a serious issue. But I'm not here to talk about that. I'm here to talk about this dog. He's crazy. And he somehow got his head and arm stuck through a loop, a metal loop that's supposed to hold his bowl

His like food bowl in his kennel and we took him to the vet and the vet's like, you know in 30 years I think I've seen something like this twice And it's like one of those special moments. It's like puppies first emergency room visit 300 dollar fine What and visit $300 fine. Oh my God. There it is. What? And Paul is talking about it. He's like, hey, babe. And I was like, she told me that I was like, you need to take him to the ER. She's like, no, no, no, my friend's coming with pliers.

And I'm like, no, no, do not take pliers to the dog. So Brandon, you've had a dog go to the merchant because of a frame sticker on their head. You've had a dog go to the merchant because they ate. Loop. Loop. Are they trying to Loub? Loub. Are they trying to kill themselves? Did you ever, did you guys ever think about that?

Well, the thing is, no, the pug loves Loub. How did you know about it? First, it's just like, found something, it's just like, this isn't bad. I mean, you think about it, like dogs just eat dry, the same dry dog food, you know, every day. Has a different... It's like dessert.

You ever had a dog get into the trash where there were tampons? Oh no. I've had that. I know. I don't think I've ever had a dog get into condoms. Yeah, that's gross. Oh yeah, I know been there. That's disgusting.

I've been more worried about that because that's like plastic. Or rubber I guess. Yeah. Well, you want want to if they do it You really want them to you know Really commit because if they just kind of fight through it. No, no, they don't realize they've like pierced it and you can't tell Wait, no, no, no, I'm talking about use condoms dude not like ew. How do you? Why would a dog have access to a use condom trash can the same way they would have access To a way you threw your condoms in trash cans and then you wash your hands

So what's yours? But this is like this is no you know You just spend like three days with like a like rotting condom like in your trash I like rotting condom, like in your trash. Why do you not supposed to do it? I condom's rot. I flushed in the toilet now. Is that a thing you're not supposed to do? I don't, I don't flush anything. You're not supposed to. Rubber or plastic into the toilet.

Yeah, I'm with Juan here. But no, no, no, no, no. But like the size of a cup, to me I always think of like when I flushed something, is it bigger than what a poop might be? Like, does that make sense? Like, if a turd, if a turd is this like, Chris though, I think the risk is, you remember your,

you're saying I should like wrap the cotton. It's the back. It's what he's talking about. Yeah, whenever you have a six pack, you know, and have like all of those like holes and you have to cut through them all. So what if you flush the condom and then all of a sudden, like, you know, it finds a fish and just like traps it,

like a net and you have like a little fish that's just like floundering in the water. And it will get impregnated by human semen and you start to see some more diversity in the fish. How mermaids are made. Yeah. Like, so are you really not supposed to flush? I don't know if it's for a fact.

I don't have any actual. Is it for the environment or for the environment? I would say environment also, I'd be worried about my plumbing. If I, what? Why I feel bad now? Oh, in an apartment. I don't care.

I think, come in, they can find like 40 condoms. Be like, what the hell is this? And be like, impressed. It's a weird thing too, because when you think about condoms, it's like, it's unborn babies that you're flushing and then also if you're killing this. But no, it's like, you're, it's unborn babies that you're fleshing in and then also if you're killing, but no, it's, that's not unborn babies.

It's probably not the best way to describe it. Okay, it's just seeming. It's just seeming. Fair enough, but it's like the potential to make babies. Plus, that's every time you jack off. Yeah, I don't know, I'm just like adding it up in my head when I'm also killing fish, John. Yeah, I know, so stop it.

Okay, well, I'm just saying it's like Throw the trash. Don't don't flush your condom down the toilet. Yeah, and if your dog gets into it And you put it in the trash do the thing when you like catch a like you have a kid who's smoking cigarettes You like make him smoke a ton And you just start if you want this schnappsy, huh? You want this most of condoms that you have. And you just start, you want this, Schnopsie, huh? You want this? You want this?

I have. I just spend your day getting like a good movie. And yeah. I have a funny story, but I won't name the name of the person that's funny stories about because I don't want to embarrass them, but you're looking at me. No, I'm not talking about you.

But he did have an instance recently where he thought he was gonna be in a position where he's gonna have a lot of sex coming up and bought a larger box of condoms that he normally would. And then that opportunity went out the window and he was not having sex so he was stuck with just a giant box of just condoms. Just turn by yourself, John. No. I always actually buy two little.

I don't ever commit on a big box. Yeah, I do want to get to a pocket. I always buy big box and just, you know, assume I'll get to a pocket. I guess I'm more of a pessimist. Is that how you can determine if your pessimists are optimists? Is the size of condo boxes? Yeah, Julian's for pessimists. Do you use Instacart? I used to, I don't know.

So Instacart is a food delivery service. It's great. I use it sometimes. Yeah. Your crowd up the grocery store. I had no issues. I don't have everyone else feels with just adding condoms on Instacart. You have an issue. You don't have an issue. Yeah, it seems perfectly fine. And I just have somebody like me for it. And then sometimes I'll be like, let's look for a look, get all this lube and stuff too. So you just have somebody like going and like

buying everything. It is. I'm in my 30s. And it still is. It's like, that sucks. Yeah, I know. But I'm, it's still like, it's still silly to me when I go buy cond sucks. Yeah, I know, but I'm it's still like, it's still silly to me when I go by condoms. Like I'm still like slightly embarrassed because it's almost like when you go and buy like just diarrhea medication, they know what this is for. And it's like you go to the store,

you know, Conor's like they know. You buy this for, when I'm talking about diarrhea, and I said you should also buy, what's that stuff to keep that keeps you from, that makes you poop fiber? Fiber, no, what's this stuff to keep, that keeps you from, that makes you poop fiber? Fiber? No, what's the sex? It's like you buy diarrhea medicine and x-lacks.

They don't know what's going on. I do like that though. If you have a cart, you're like Walgreens to get condoms and then have a box of pop tarps and new batteries. It's like, what kind of nut am I going to have? What's the opposite of a condom? Like, die of a condom? Like a diet for kid? What's the okay so a condom stops a girl from getting pregnant.

So something that facility I don't know like a funnel like a turkey baster. No, no super soaker because you keep pumping, but like and then you would have to be spray in there or the strong jet. It would have to be something that facilitated pregnancy just to like, so then I guess like prenatal like vitamins or something. No, because then they're like now then they should have bought these before. I guess that's for after you pregnant. Have you ever had a condom break?

No. During coitus. I don't. But did everybody else like afterward, you go to the sink and then you just like put it on the sink and then you fill up with water and then you inspect it and you do one like flick. No, I'm talking like a very clear break.

I know. Yeah, but I think it was just like once, I think. Did you do something about it or did you just roll the dice? No, no, it was before finish. So it was like, it was like, oh shit, let's get a new one. Do you have a child? Do you have a kid? Oh, God, can you imagine if Chris had a kid?

God, no. Oh, I want to have a kid. I feel better, I'm sure you take care of you, Chris. You have to be very responsible. Speaking of kids. I probably get him hung up on the bowl of his food thing. Yeah. There's a great picture that we used in the what do you know show where Chris was on the time travel episode where he's got a little Joel on the. Is it Joel?

No, no, it's yeah. I'm the adult. You're the dad and Joel is the kid. It's a great son and Joel's kid. I think Chris would make a really, really, really fun father. I'll be it maybe a little absent. I think I'd be a cooler uncle. Yeah. Yeah. It's like you'd be surprised. You'd be surprised how quickly the kid itself, for like a better word, matures you or, or, or inspires you to the position. So I think given a child, you'd be, you'd, you'd get right up there and be a good dad. Let's roll the position. So I think given a child, you'd get right up there and be a good dad. Let's roll the dice. Does anybody else, anybody out there have a kid to give? We should have four years after me to invite him.

And making one. Social experiments to perform here. Yeah, can we just, can we just, can we like have Chris foster a kid for like a few months? No episode of Social Disorder. Yeah. Can I ask you guys a very serious relationship question? Yeah, yeah, do you?

It's apparently like nobody, nobody sees the same way. You guys remember that song, 99 Problems? But a bitch ain't right. By Jay-Z. Right. He has like, he's saying he has 99 problems because he's in like a good relationship, right? And he doesn't he's in a good relationship, right?

And he doesn't have to worry about that relationship, right? Is that everyone else? I should have said that if it was that or if it was that he didn't have a girlfriend at the time. Yeah, but then you got, that's a, oh man. That's not fun. He's just saying broadly, I have many problems, but the dog investigating my car is not one

because I'm protected by civil rights. That's it, right? I don't know where that went. That's it, don't you guys know that? That's exactly what it means. I don't, why are you bringing up Jay Z. lyrics? Because I was talking to somebody last night about this and I mean, everybody had a completely different opinion

and it just like blew me because I thought. I think it generally is, I have nine-year problems but a unfortunate girl. No, it's not, it's about a dog. It's about a drug dog. I'm not even kidding. Back me up in these comments, folks, because these guys did not do their homework.

I did. Is it really? Is it really? Yeah. We heard it too, dad. Is it really? It's a drug dog? Man, don't you listen to the lyrics,

so you just dance in the club, bro. I know he's, I know he's- I don't dance in the club either. You guys will like co-ops him right. And you want to get in the club compartment in the trunk. And he says, you need a warrant for that. That's the only lyric I remember. Is the dog in the trunk? The dog I believe is outside the car in the interior.

But it says in the song, if you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you son. Yes, that is separate. That is like, you are having problems of any nature and I do sympathize, but it is not my particular. It's a little bit misleading to start the verse off with girl and end it with bit. Right, your congressman, man.

You're gonna get involved. Cruiser doesn't care. Oh no, the reason it came up, because like sometimes whenever I get out of a relationship and I'll be like, oh man, that kind of, it was kind of nice. Now it's like, I have a hundred problems, but that doesn't make sense.

So nobody agrees with me. That what? I don't know what you're answering the facts. That Jay-Z, the whole point is that he's in a very nice relationship. Like, I think I have a time. I think I have a time. I'm in.

I just don't care. All right, fair enough. Not big on Jay-Z. I have no idea what kind of music you listen to, Chris. Slipknot. Yeah. I just see it written. You just slipknot tattoo on his lower back. Tells you everything.

Chris, you didn't want to see that. I would have seen it. No, of course not. I don't know. It's like a scene you're going to watch it. All right, there are circumstances in which I will watch it, but I didn't. I watched.

I watched a pretty cool commercial. I watched the entire game from start to finish. Didn't it like get really close? Yeah, it did. Like it was a surprise close. It went over time for the first time in history. And it was like surprising only close. It was like, as in like the first half of the game,

Falcons were killing them. And then they in like the first half of the game, Falcons were killing them and then they scored nothing the second half and the Pats just kept scoring and scoring and bringing it back up to you. It wasn't necessarily close. It was one side and then one side and on the other, but there was a commercial, I think you would like. From Amazon, it was like 15 seconds and you think it's advertising their little,

what's it, the Echo device where you say, oh, buy me detergent or whatever. I'm like, let's do that. Yeah, so you're like, oh, I don't know detergent. And let me order something here. And you're like, okay, it's kind of lame. And then all of a sudden, the drone appears and it has it for you.

It's like a two second tease. Yeah. But they tease the drone like, I know, but this is, yeah, but before Black Friday or or digital Monday, what a fuck it's called. But I mean, this has to mean something a little bit more, right? Like drones, really getting closer. Drone teasing is becoming a real issue in this country.

Okay. I don't think we should support it anyway. Gaga, did you see the Gaga's half time show? Yeah. Did you see her drones? Kid drones. Her drone army? She had, it opens up and it's her, like on top of the state of the very top

and it's just this, it's frames. So she's in the bottom middle of the screen and just giant black sky behind her. And then stars start blinking and lighting up and I'm like, this is sort of LED net up there but then like perspective wise it was like that's too far away and then the fucking lights started to move in formation and change lights and form the American flag and everything turns out she had a bunch of drones just ordered a bunch of Doritos

like a look that's all drones wow and they were like moving and floating in in in sink you know, How freaky would it be like the guy controlling it? I was like all right, I got to turn these off and then all of a sudden they all fly away like you've created an entire Swarm like a drone army like the end of her Let me find if it was just always in an American flag formation like sorry pal You can buy the drone army, but she's always going to be in this year formation Like sorry pal, you can buy the drone army, but she's always going to be in this year for a major

Guys I cornered the market once it started drone teasing two years ago Now I sell I drone flags Get one for any country So at the end of the performance she just jumps off stage. No, she committed. Oh, yeah At the beginning she jumped off and at the end she jumped how cool she just jumps off stage, right? No, she committed suicide at the end. She did. At the beginning, she jumped off and at the end, she jumped off. How cool would it be if she just disappeared? That would be pretty impressive. She decided that she was gonna go away and then like, that would be the most amazing.

And she's very aimed to come to a chasm that opened up into the depths of the world. Yeah. She did it. She did a literal mic drop and then herself drop is what she did. Chris, did you just say chasm? She did say chasm? He did say chasm. Do we point that kind of thing out? No, no, we just keep moving.

We just keep moving. We just keep moving. We just keep moving. If we stopped every time Chris did these things. We wait for one person to point it out on the comments and then everybody's either. All right, great, great. And then we create a show around it.

But yeah, it's crazy the way that the drones and the way we're so willing to use robotics in the air, like how far it's advancing. Apparently Uber's robotics in the air. Why for instance, Uber is working with NASA to develop a self-driving flying car. And I told him, I was like, me that on Twitter today, we're not getting flying car. And I told him that I was like, me that on Twitter today.

We're not getting flying cars. We're not. Now that's we're good all year. It's just a bigger drone. Hey, look, it's just a bigger drone. We're not getting cars. The thing I trust is a company like Uber trying to get out of paying independent contractors

as shit ton of money. Like I can see the motivation there. That looks like concept art from some failed ride at Disneyland. Okay, that we're not gonna get those in our lifetime. It's just a big drone, dude. I mean, why don't the drone just like pick you up by the shoulders, like how big you look at the talent

and take you around? There is actually a drone robot that actually has two arms. That they like demonstrate that the lift capacity, it can go and pick up a chair and can lift, I think about 40 pounds and people are like making jokes. Like yeah, the drone eagle's gonna come and steal your children away. Because it's just literally these two paws

I can just go and grab your hands. 40 pounds. That is, you know, that's 80 pounds away from a small person. Wait, what? That is a small person. Well, what? That is a small person. Well, I get, okay, a child. Children don't technically count as people. It's Casey Neistat.

Came out of the video and over Christmas. He did the drone, pulled him while he snowboarded. And that point. It was a super drone or something, right? Yeah, it made a super drone that was able to pull him snowboarding and then even like was carrying him off the ground at points. Like he was flying via drone.

That is an insane video. That is just nober. It's not in the future. Like, they're absolutely motivated. Like they will save money. There it is. The fucker can lift up little children. You wouldn't even have to fly that high.

Just covering a few inches off the ground. You just need to get above cars and trees. How? How? Like, you think just like 10 feet off the ground? I think like 20. Do you think it's a height problem or a weight problem that's stopping us from using drones? But it's not the drone teasing. I mean, it's guess is a little both. Yeah.

But I'm just saying as like, it's not like you'd have to be flying up and you'd be like 100 feet up in the air for a drone to work. Yeah, but I mean, what about when they're going different directions, you got to have like differences. Maybe that's what it is. Maybe depending on what structure you're going, there's different heights. Would you be like they never bump into each other?

So you'd be excited about using this, right? Sure. What it's going on is that you're hanging upside down from Phantom Menace. What's that? All that's going through Chris's head is like, Corus Sontward is like a million lanes of like flying cars, going to different heights from each other. Or back to the future.

Yeah, or fifth element, any of those. There has to be some sort of logic to it, but I think it's doable. Well, when they needed, they'll come to you to figure it out, okay? Yeah. Department, as they needed, they'll come to you to figure it out, okay? Yeah. Department, as a secretary of transfer, transfer of transfer.

I have just department as much as that. It'll be just, yeah, it'll be just as good as anybody in there right now. The department of drone facilitation. That's gonna be a department subject. It has to be, yeah. Christa Maris is going to be so terrific. He had one idea about Southbound.

Drone's going at 10 feet while Northbound at 25 feet is brilliant. Give him the job. There's something different about your Trump. That's a little bit more like foreign or something. Like it's it's foreign. No, it's the SaaS. There's a little bit of SaaS to it. You see like it's like John Travolta doing a Trump impression. That's where it is. I love. Yeah, there's love

I love talking. I love you talking about me. I love drones. I love Chris This can you can you say what's an iconic John Travolta one? Oh? Look who's talking the baby is talking Yeah, wow. that's no that's like oh my god Trump's the president here you go. That's revolta. Oh my god. No higher form of comedy than impressions She's lost like everyone 140. That's okay on that note I just want to let everybody note that this Valentine's Day give a gift that they can unwrap again and again, matching underwear from me undies.

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I go to meundies.com slash rooster teeth right now for 20% off your first order. That's meundies.com slash rooster teeth. I gotta admit, the matching underwear part is what sells me. It's like the idea of like walking around. It's like a little bit romantic. And they may ask you about trying to wear brand new.

Like peeping Tom's will be like, oh my God, that's really cool. They both have the same. Actually I ask, all you guys, me and these high quality, the good kind of underwear, you're special underwear. Do you guys have in where you keep your underwear, like tears of underwear as far as like,

when you've gone past the good underwear and now you've like put off like laundry for two months. I keep having the one that's like the bottom, I definitely have a bottom tier. Yeah, that's like, I washed the one with the tunnel holes in it again. I guess I'll wear it once more hoping that I'll notice after I take it off. To throw it away. Yeah, to put a belt on to keep the elasticity.

I actually, this is too much information, but I actually do a thing where when I just I destroy, destroy underwear, I put them on. You flush it down the top. And then I rip them off like the whole thing. They've already got like seven holes in them. In front of a lady. I mean, I'm engaged, so yeah, probably. There's a danger in that,

because I used to do like keep the worst case scenario underwear with holes, but I did the same thing with jeans. And then there was one day in college where the doomsday scenario, I only had the holes with the jeans with the holes and the underwear with jeans. And then there was one day in college where the Doomsday scenario, I only had the holes with the jeans with the holes and the underwear with holes. And I remember just kind of like sitting there and I kind of like just happened to look down and I was like, are those my balls?

That I see right there? Are they? I can't, I think. So it's like two slices of Swiss cheese is going back and forth. It's like, oh, when's it going to show the balls? So I definitely recommend throwing the old ones out and getting new ones. If you ever board, look on Yahoo answers or whatever

for, are my farts shredding my underwear? Is that okay? I wonder what it is about underwear that you rode. I just like, there's certain types of questions I like to ask Yahoo. Well, I don't need to like Google it. I don't really want to know. I just want to know what the average person thinks.

It is. You mean like the complete auto complete or oh no Google answer. Yeah, I've never asked for Yahoo answers. Yeah, because it's done by like other people. Yeah, and Billy and I vote on the best one too. Yeah. But yeah, I think they think that it does shred your underwear.

Does it? I don't know what it is about underwear that gets eroded. I could see how over time with certain chemicals that could erode it. All right, what chemicals are being introduced down in your penis? Well, I'm just saying that. Out of, yeah, like where are chemicals coming from

downstairs, right? It's only your butt and maybe your penis, right? On a man, yes. Yeah, I'm man. The chemicals coming out of your penis. Well, I guess clarifying Todd, what chemicals come out of the penis that would erode underwear?

I know, this is what I'm talking about. You know, Yahoo! This is a good stuff. I mean, you're gonna get good stuff. I'm on, yeah, I'm on, like, what's in P? Yeah, but you would think that they would have to both be in the same area. Do you ever get P, like, through,

what are you talking about? Because like, you're gonna concentrate in one area. You're not gonna have the erosion. Brandon, Brandon, Brandon. Chris has a science show. So I'd like to hear. All right, fair enough. I'd like to hear from our resident scientists.

What, what can I- I'm just saying, I don't think the chemicals are tearing it apart, but they might contribute over time to the material breaking down, possibly. I'm not saying that's the only factor, what's the other factors? I think just friction and then what parts are art like get pulled on the most or like,

it's like Shawshank redemption, pressure and time, you have your roto man's on these. get pulled on the most or like, it's like, I'll show us a redemption, pressure and time. It will put a man on these. I'm just, I'm always happy to talk about science with you, Chris. I'm always so happy. I just, like, I love science and I love it like twice as much when I get to talk about with you.

What else can we learn about science today? Can I ask you an underwear etiquette question? More we want, wait, can we combine that? What's your etiquette question? So let's say you shower in the morning, right, full day, next day comes, you don't have time to shower. So you put on your clothes. Now you didn't shower, but do you still replace your underwear?

Well, when did I shower? You shower like Monday morning, and couldn't shower Monday night, couldn't shower Tuesday morning. So you put on clothes for two days. Yeah. Then I probably get me underwear. You got it? No, but I'm saying do actually do that. I've gone two days in a row. Same underwear. Yeah. Only if I'm like, oh, it's all the situation in which I was like, well, I'm not doing anything with my life today. Isn't that me?

I will say, I will say, it's, for me, it's when I know that there's not going to be an instance that anyone is going to be present when my pants are off. As in, I live alone, and there will be no sexual partner tonight. So if something comes up, what are you gonna do? Like something you didn't anticipate. I don't know, I'm just looking up now. I guess, I guess I have never been in a situation where I didn't anticipate there being a possibility of sex. I've never had spontaneous surprise sex. You never had surprises.

Just haven't gotten there yet, Brandon. Surprise sex. Like it's usually like a planned occurrence. Hold on, are you? 32. Interesting. I have a good you? 32. Interesting. I have a good feeling about it. I have a very sad history of...

Why is that? You seem perfectly normal. Yeah, but it's not been a very like, sexually affluent history. You know what? June is gonna be your month. I've got a good feeling about June for you. Now, I mean, now when I have sex in June,

I'm just gonna keep thinking of you. I'm just like, God damn it, Brandon was right. June is hot. So I don't know if you guys saw, but speaking of fucking disgusting body things, there was somebody who, I think a woman who like woke up and she had like some like a weird sensation like in her nose and she had no some like a weird sensation like in her nose and she had no idea what it was. I don't want to know the story.

She went to the doctor and they found a bug had crawled up her nose and was in her skull and stopped her close to her brain. Stop it. Done. What? Is that weird? That's gross. It just makes me icky.

Stop it. Oh, yeah. I showed a picture. A video. OK, come on. I don't want it. Stop. I think that's a monarch butterfly, guys. That's a caterpillar. Let it live.

How important was that, lady? That was the nasal cavity. I can't do that kind of stuff. It's a bit of a bop. It's really gross. Well, the cool thing about your sinuses are just a bunch of caves in your face. That people don't really realize you.

How are these caves in your face? Yeah, but I don't like. But it's like, how do you get it it out do they go through do you remember do you guys see was a total recall? Yeah, when he has to get that homing thing out of his head So they just like shove the metal claw and rip it out. You all right John. Yeah, I'm good. I'm good I can't do that kind of stuff. What stuff? Just that kind of like nasty body things like they put it up on them Like I'll take like people who go on, like, I can't do that, you can't unsee stuff. Like once you've seen, you can't unsee it,

it's stuck in your head and you're just plain, replaying this nasty image in your head, I can't do that stuff. What's the worst thing that you've had done to your body? Like medically, like any kind of like medical probe. I don't know, they shush. Chesco measurements, pretty rough. No, it was upper and oscopy.

I've had a doctor do the colon exam. I've had a, I've had a, they had to like, check out that uretha. And why are you making a shape of your fist? Cause that's what it fucking feels. How it makes your uretha? That's what it feels like. But I was, it was like, to a point where.

A little chasm. I had to shut my eyes. I had no, I had to shut my eyes because I would not want to see, I would not want to have that image of what it looked like to be probed like that, to have the thing and the thing of the thing, because that's something that you can never get out of your brain.

Hopefully they got it out. They got it. Is it still there? They got it. Is it still there? They got it. I don't know the things about that. But no, I saw I see what you're saying about like you can't ever on see things. And it's just gonna like, That's a bad stuff happening to me.

Like I've been poked and prod in my entire life because of medical problems. Like I like, oh man, one of the worst instance I went out before I had my testosterone injections. One of the things that was weird about me was that my veins were not very prominent at all. So giving blood was the most difficult fucking thing to do. And I had to give blood all the time because they wanted to check on me. And so I just had to do it constantly. Normally you go get, give blood, you know what?

They go for the arm and they just search, find the vein pretty quickly, get it in there and do it. I had instances when I was younger where they would, not only, have you ever had someone go in there, miss the vein, and then try to look around for it with the needle? That's bad. I've had it where they've done here, here, here,

other hand, had me do jumping jacks and push-ups to try to get blood to push these veins up, and then try again, I've had like five holes put into me. Do you ever think about sneaking in with somebody else's blood? You mean like, oh yeah, just give me a little help. Look here. Well, this is Yax blood. Why are you bringing this Yax blood?

Do you feel like that's made you less likely to like do heroin? Oh, I have a, this is also the saddest thing about my... I'm not saying you would do to her. I'm saying like, no. I am scared of needles and I have to give myself injections I have I have to get injections my entire life. I have to get injections for my entire life I make a recommendation. I learned a trick at the vet So

Basically what we'll do is next time you need some like you know to get a shot We're gonna put a string of cheese on the table And then you'll just keep licking the cheese and they'll give you all of the injections you need and you won't even notice. Trust me, it was amazing. Yeah, no, I actually, I like cheese. I do love cheese, we go.

Yeah. You like going on a ride? Do I go outside? Who goes outside? No, I just, I fear needles. I actually like have like a phobia of needles. I hate them with a passion, but they are part of my life forever.

And that's just a great tragedy in life. Yeah, I can get it. That's more ironic. It's ironic tragedy. It's ironic tragedy. You still live, that's. Yeah. And I'm a, I'm a, I'm a,

I look like an adult now, so that's good. Yeah, sort of. You're getting there. Yeah, it's weird. I used to be totally okay with it as a kid. I'd be like, oh, this is so cool. And now as an adult, I can't look, I just have to look away. I don't have a problem with it. I still look away just so that I'm not like,

10 stop, because I think it's harder to, you know, because if you see someone stabbing you, you're more likely to like, I hate how you're just part of somebody's day who does that all the time. And they're just like, yeah, let's go, how you doing today? Yeah, and you're like, oh, let's go. How you doing today? Yeah? Potention

Yeah, it's scary when someone's like working on you and just seems to be like completely oblivious like I had a other needle When you get your tassashan is it back a little bit? Sorry, sorry someone pointed out and I don I don't know if this is true, is pointing rude in other countries? Yeah. No. It's even rude in this country in some instances. Stop. You were interjecting though.

You weren't pointing, you were going, I'm a little bit more, yeah. It was very much an interjection like an interjection. Your testosterone injections. Where do they inject them? Like, you're, okay, now mine. The meat of that. No, actually, what do you think? I was just wondering, what, you know, okay, now mine. The meat of that. No, actually, what do you think?

I was just wondering, what were you wondering? If they injected them into your balls. And you are the reason why there is a warning on the medicine. Don't do that. There's literally like the day I got my injections, the first time they're like, do not put this into your penis. Do not put this into your balls. What would happen if you did?

I don't know, but bad things I assume. Would it fill it up when they get temporarily bigger? What if you don't know that? You don't know that. I'm not gonna try it. If a doctor tells me this medicine, don't put in your balls, I'm inclined to just go with them. Can you do me a favor?

No, I'm not gonna do that. No, no, no, I'm not asking you to inject them into your balls. No, no, no, no, no, I'm not asking you to do that. your book. No, no, no, no, I'm not asking you to do that. I'm asking, next time we go to the doctor, can you ask what would happen? I will ask. Thank you. Next time I go to my specialist. Yeah.

If it does make them bigger, would you want to come with me next time I go to my specialist? If you just want to ask any questions you might have about, I'll think on it. I'll come up with a list. I could listen to my friend Chris. He's going to be joining us for your consultation today. He'll be a conscientious observer. He might have a few questions. I'd appreciate if you answered all of them.

If it did make them bigger, would you be more willing to try it? Like, if you had a date that night? Wait, balls? No, it cares about big balls. Who cares about it? No one likes big balls. Really? I don't think so.

It makes me feel better. What, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, It's usually in pornography, but like I don't feel like those it's just the proportions. You don't know You kind of just implied that you're constantly looking at balls No, I'm not constantly. I'm just saying it happens And I quote you're constantly looking at other let's go back to the tank. Yes We did an episode of what do you know on pornography and April O'Neal was on it who's really really cool. I'm not getting any initials. Mm-hmm We did an episode of what do you know on pornography and April O'Neal was on it who's really really cool. I'm not you need any turtles No, the porn star April O'Neal. Oh, okay. She's super cool. She goes to like Comic-Con. She's like big nerd

But she was in a porn based on Star Trek and so for B-roll I asked the company to use a Star Trek porn No, it was gotta be a good name a lot. They've gotten in the habit where they just do Star Trek parody. Star Trek parody. That's so sad. I think for probably searchability purposes. So the company sent me a DVD to be able to get footage from. You know what you want, and check out two.

Yeah, taking parables too. No, no, no. Well, now I guess I should anyway So it was this sensation Edward the idea of like ripping all of those on a computer at work That's bullshit and you used to search the weirdest stuff at work. We all do No, no, no. No, not porn. No, yes porn. No, I remember.

We wouldn't like, we'll never pull up porn. Yes, you used to look up EFUCT at work. Well, no, if something came up and I was like, hey, look at this, this is funny. It's like porn bloopers. What? You never been to that website? No.

Oh, it's some of the stuff's funny. Some of the stuff is very not cool and appropriate. Some of the stuff's gonna funny. I gotta stay away in that website. Oh, oh, it's some of the stuff's funny some of the stuff is very not cool and appropriate some of the stuff's kind of funny I got to stay away from that then Oh, it was only like it was yeah, I was a poop blooper. Yeah, no, it can't do that. He can't on see it though He's got that super power. We can't see it and guys ever see Zach and Miri make a porno Kevin Smith. Oh, yeah, that's something you can't on see There's a off there's a scene where one of them,

there's like, there actually is a porn star in the cast. The rest are like all their friends and stuff. And she showed up to set and she's said she's constipated. I don't know if I should tell this story on here, but she says she's constipated and they're like, you okay, but she's like, oh yeah, anal really loosens things up. And there is a anal poop, visual gag that is terrible later on.

I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I feel bad for bringing that up. You didn't want to see the bug on screen. No, I didn't want to see the seed there. I was watching a comedy and then like that happened. You think in the script, they actually just put like an image in there, just see like you can get it. Like somebody's watching that like we changed the subject. I feel so bad.

I regret it. And what's next on the agenda? You should do the 5050 subreddit a lot. We should do that. Yeah, we did 5050. I guess what we did more, 5050. Yeah, yeah. I did.

That was only like late at night, like when we were like, it was like, right, because that makes it better. Yeah. I, I, I was on the subject of weird things on our computer. It's different if it's like super late at night and you're crazy as opposed to like 10 a.m. Let's, on the subject of weird things on our computer, you know, we're like, super late at night and you're crazy as opposed to like 10 a.m. let's get our coffee and go to 55. I don't think so.

What is on the 50, 50 subreddit? It's like, it's like, it'll, it'll say, it's got to tie like, like a cute little kitten falling into a basket of flowers or, or, or a bug being pulled out of someone's naval capital. And you click it and you don't know what it is. That does dance. Yeah, roll the dice.

You have no wins in situations. But it's never the cute one again. Because there are places on the internet that just have the good stuff. You can just go to the subredd. I have a good stuff. Yeah, but it's like, it's like, it's the real life's a risk. It's a terrible thrill. Did you guys ever do like chat roulette or anything like that?

Yeah. There were two at one time. Dick roulette? Yeah, that thing is amazing. How many, it just goes straight to genitals. One time, it was a Christmas get together at Zach Anner's house. And he was like, he thought it would be fun to seeing Christmas carols on chat roulette

And so we were everyone's kind of been drinking so we start doing chat roulette and of course It's mostly dead and we're just like a group of people singing and eventually but it's like it's quick Because it'll cut through it. Yeah eventually you settle and we're just singing and this we're just singing to a dude jerking it And then eventually like we like Hell salad night go for it. I know it's like and then we finish a Christmas song and he finishes and he finishes And it was like the whole room was like clapping. It's like You know wrong. What is wrong with everybody? What is wrong with everybody? What is wrong with everybody? Stop doing that stuff. We weren't doing anything weird jack off by yourself in your own room of shame, okay?

Don't do it on the internet. The guy can't ejaculate unless he hears the end of silent. Yeah. Talk about holy nights. Yeah. The holy sucks. It's kind of poetic when you think about it. Man, that's not okay.

Sorry, well, let's stop, stop. And then you just keep bringing it up more and more stuff. I was gonna say that I had to have that moment of we have weird things on our computer here at work where I just had up on my giant monitor, Pinterest is a really good place to go find like visual, like inspiration for like designs or aesthetic or style.

And I just had a Pinterest board that was just Nazi design. And it was just full of just cons of just tons of Nazi paraphernalia and clothing and design. It was for a project, but I was like, I'm at work. And I have Nazi stuff all over my computer. I had to avoid making a political joke.

I also abstained from the management. Yeah, I thought of that. That particular one. Speaking of which, anybody watch SNL? God, it. Yeah, I thought of it. Not a particular one. Yeah, yeah. Speaking of which, anybody watched SNL? God, it was good, man. Didn't watch SNL, but did watch that one skit. Yeah.

Melissa McCarthy is a great, fantastic job. And I don't really care for her as a comedian very much, but she was so good in that. I think she's good. Well, it just kind of like built on her, you know, the character she has in every movie, which is just super, super crazy, too much, and it's just, it fit in. So, well, I looked at it was in the middle of the show. Yeah. Wasn't it the, you know, cold open, and it just, just came out of nowhere.

And it was so perfect. It's like, the goal of that show should be to put funny sketches throughout, but somehow they just always trick you into not putting funny sketches throughout. Shots. Every once every seven years, we're going to give you the whole solid episode. I'm not the only guy to ever think this. No, every seven years, we're gonna give you the whole solid episode. I'm not the only guy to ever think this. No, but I mean, yeah, it's- You guys are backing away from this establishment. Well, pro nazi, I get it.

Antikid, pro, dog suicide. You were on different sides of the equation here, I get it. I mean, live show's hard. I, yeah, it is. It is. It is. That live show of comedy is hard. It's not that hard.

Look, we're crushing it. No, but we're actually like, we don't want to fuck we're talking about, but I mean like sketches that have to be written like mostly. By a professional team of writers who are arguably the best and most talented in the country, it shouldn't be that hard. I know guys who have written on that staff and they say like, just, it's all political and like the good stuff always gets killed. Like there's always enough for for two really solid shows.

Yeah, but I think that's a mindset for most of that entertainment environment where it's a lot easier for people to say, I'm not saying this not the case. I'm not saying the way it comes. Call me a liar? I'm saying that you're a fucking liar. I'm saying that that mindset is a very common mindset in the entertainment industry where, oh yeah,

the bad stuff doesn't get made. I don't know, that one I tend to think it's true. I think there's some political stuff. I don't doubt that- Oh, those has to be in this one and whatever I do want to do this one. But I mean, I don't know any writer from Hollywood that I've ever talked to or an article that doesn't complain

about their stuff getting altered or the good stuff not being used or just the trash they have to be. Yeah, but I think the point of us now is to call the best sharpest. You would think ideally, ideally. I wrote on the Chelsea Handler Netflix show and they didn't like my ideas. So it was a failure. Is that how I write? I write, that is how I write.

Is that how writers talk? Is that how you talk when you're writing? Yes, yes, that's a good hand right there. Yeah, I would say yeah, ideally, I mean SNL would have the best writers that are available because I mean, I don't know very many comedians and comedic writers who wouldn't want to work for SNL. And ideally ideally they would have the pick of the litter to have the best people on it, it could make the best sketches every single week to make them feel bad about themselves and then. But it's, you know, but also I think comedy, especially that quickly made can be such a subjective thing that you're not going to hit the mark every single time. You just can't. And there's so many different voices, like between like other writers, different levels

cast members, producers. I mean, it's a crazy that they even get it. I know, I know, I got a feeling an hour of some sketches. It ain't that hard. A lot of it's taped already. In a week with the best talent in the most budget? Yeah, but even the best talent in that given time

can make bad stuff. And honestly, I think they should. I'm saying that yeah, I expect the best stuff from the best writers out there, but there you go. I do. And then Greenlighter, Lord Michaels, Greenlighter, Greenlighter, we've demanded. Yeah, I'm just saying that it's such a subjective

and ethereal concept, making a funny sketch that you can't just for sure always have an hour of solid, great stuff. Yeah, you can. I mean, good comedy writers, good comedy, good comedy. What show did that? Did you ever have a plot?

A sketch? Yeah. Well, I mean, you know, I said I was like a different beast though. It is a weekly, you know, it is whatever 13. But even like Key and Peel, which was produced beforehand and written and high production value,

not every single sketch there's was gold. And that's a controlled environment too, because it's the same two people. And there, if you have like so many different random cast members and then the hosts, sometimes it's the same cast, but their writing staff was more than just them. And they had like really a talented writers on there. And they still like, you know,

wasn't like, there was a variance of good to bad. Did you ever hear this kind of change? So, but do you ever hear about the staff that was on Dana Carvey's sketch show like after he was on SNL? It was Steven Colbert, the guy who wrote the Orchid Kaufman, Charlie? Charlie Kaufman?

Charlie Kaufman, Dana Carvey Tim Meadows, and like three other people who are like insanely big. Yeah. And it was a total flop. Yeah, I mean that's you can't The every every comedic writer every writer has bad stuff in them that will come out and not be made well because there's also like There's steps beyond just the finger to you know, I know dude. I'm a comedy writer. I know I know it is

I don't know. I'm defending I don't know why I'm so so you're the guy who said you don't watch us now. I don't I don't know why I'm so so. You're the guy who said you don't watch us. I don't. I don't. Really? I actually don't watch any TV. I watch no TV. Everything I watch is movies or premium like you know.

I started to watch just dramas too. Like what dramas? Like taboo. Yes, watching that taboo. I haven't watched taboo. I don't know. Very good. Before we start talking about awesome shows.

Westworld. Is that drama? I do want to say something. All right. Aren't you tired of guessing what she wants for Valentine's Day? Wouldn't you love an easy, fail-proof way to look like a pro? This year, pro-flowers is making it easier than ever by taking all of the guest's workout.

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and then type in my code, Teeth. Don't wait, or today, the deal expires soon. Favorite thing about that is actually comes with a vase. That's the worst thing in the world. You show up or just deliver flowers and it's like, well, fuck with them. What am I supposed to do with this? I say, it's worse than having to find a vase

is never having a frame for your posters. Why do people say Voss? Why do people say Chasm? Cause they're German. No, but that's a thing though, right? Some people say Voss. No, who's I don't know? I thought some people yeah, certain people say Voss Yeah, that's the more I think that's over $10,000 a vase becomes a vase That's spent $10,000. Yeah. Have you ever had has anybody ever got new flowers Chris? Me yeah, no, why would I get flowers? I don't know. Why couldn't you get flowers? Does anyone ever got new flowers, Chris. Me? Yeah. No? Why would I get flowers?

I don't know. Why couldn't you get flowers? Has anyone ever got new flowers? No, they haven't. Let me get all your flowers. They'll put the pro flowers for the flowers. This is sad. Yeah.

Perk up this place. You're going to hold it to that. You can't tell them you're going to do it and then not do it. What's that discount code? T-T. T. It's my code. T.

But I upcharged the vase is going to be 10,000 hours. That's the way he says it. Um, someone on Twitter said, when you know, it's like about pointing. Yeah. They said it's way nicer. If you point with two fingers, that's not nicer. Is it because it looks, it's like, hey, hey, Chris, with two fingers, you feel, no, it looks like a, you see on an airplane and you're going like, that's why they're here.

They said, do's like a flight attendant Looks like we're trying to threaten somebody with a gun. Well, that's what the thumb no Yeah, or this yeah, what do you do this when you point? Do you go like this every time you're pointing? It's the same way politicians will point with with their thumbs like with their like this with their hand glass close This yeah, I got you clashed, close. This. Yeah, I got you. Yeah, yeah. It's just pointing at me.

It's just starting to be chained. Yeah. No, anyway. It's not the same thing at all. It's weird. So, did you see the trailer for, was it Stranger Things, too? Yeah, I did. Last night.

I wonder what? I wonder what? Even Stranger Things? It's amazing they come up with the trailer for that thing, and it is not coming out for forever. All they need is a couple shots. They have a lot of shots in there. You know, I mean, there's probably a lot of people

who haven't seen the first season. So it's probably not so much about waiting for everybody to see that people who haven't seen it go watch it. I mean, they're just tepples to the first. Yeah, but the majority of people who are going to see it have seen at this point. What does that mean?

I mean, there's people who just don't know about it. I don't know. Super Bowl is the thing that gets people talking, you know, like a Super Bowl ad, like, what the hell was that? Was that, and everyone's like, oh my God, you haven't seen Stranger Things? You know, it's like creates that.

I think Stranger Things is one that most people who are going to actually see it have seen it by now. Yeah, they should take it off Netflix. Everybody's already seen it, he's gonna see it. I agree with that. They just, you just, as a message on there, you should have seen this by now. So, did you need, I guess, no, I was like,

did you need me guys go to RTX and no one went to RTX? You know, Australia? No, that's why we're on the show. That's why we're on the show. That's why we're here because we're, this cast brought to you by RTX Sydney. That was, you guys, no, are you guys not there by now? That was my show on Friday, on the spot,

the cast that couldn't go to RTX. It was on it. It was a Stan Cole, Gray and Maggie. Hey, I'll do another one. Yeah. If you have me. Okay. Put some comments in there.

They were saying that I should have an episode of on the spot where we just have all the bald white guys that we know on the show. Shane and McCormick John are their Tom Booker and then Tom, different from a new friend Todd. Yeah, dude. That'd be fun. Tom Booker's awesome.

We worked with him like a ton. And then whenever the camera cuts to me, we could just swap you guys around. Like a little Benny Hill music? Yeah. And then cut to the team. It's like, oh, Tom's on the different side of the screen. Keep it in the same clothes too.

That'd be awesome. I would love to do that. It'd be really confusing. It would be awesome. Can't tell why people fart anyways. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, They are. Me and Aaron went to Pax South on our way back. That's right, you guys had a panel. Yeah, that's fun. What did you talk about on the panel?

Well, we showed some 11 little roosters. We showed some, what do you know? Question mark. And we also showed an RTA early, and then we just talked about, yeah, just a lot of everything. Was it just you and Aaron on panel? Just me and Aaron. What absurd R.T. panel.

Where was the panel? That's the representation of Bruce A. The representation of Bruce A. Was to do to look similar enough to each other. One's like probably a little bit muscle in the other one, but they're about the same person. About the same haircut. Uh-huh. Just generic white dudes.

That's pretty accurate. Yeah, if you stretch Chris wider, I can see that. But what, did you have like a question to answer time? Well, we did some stuff on Twitter and we did like, it was fun, it was a good panel. What questions did you get asked? What city and state was it in? It was in San Antonio, Texas.

Oh, right. And stop with this, this is really violent. I like it, I like bi- I like it. I actually like it really. It's like underlining. And as of being every once in a while, in real life. But no, no, so we were on our way back from San Antonio

and we went to this restaurant. And so we were looking for a place to get like breakfast, lunch, brunch. Food, food. And there was, I don't know if I should say the name of it. Anyway, I'll say the name of it. It was a place called capis capis which which the first warning should have been like it's a restaurant that's one letter away from crappies

so that's like number I'd actually go to a restaurant that was like that at the balls to name itself crappies. Yeah And so we go and it was weird because there were like two restaurants, and then like another warning sign was like, they're like, you're like, well, we need to go to the bathroom. And they're like, oh, well, there's a bathroom upstairs, but really, you're better off going to the restaurant next door to go.

What? I swear to God, like just being the fryer. Yeah, it's crappies, but it was a really nice place. Nope, well, no, it had good food eventually. I like when my meal gets good eventually. Don't start off with the good stuff. So we got to it. So we were looking, they brought the menu and they had a special, because it was like Chinese

New Year. They had a Chinese New Year special. And it was like Chinese New Year special and it was a Craype rap thing, but in it was a Craype with fried mussels and pork and chili and just like everything. Sounds good. No, with mussels from San Antonio. Oh, landlocks. Mussels. like chili and just like everything, right? No, with muscles from San Antonio. Oh, landlocks. Muscles, all right.

So then, so mean, it's from the same face. It's from the landlocks. We have the golf down, right? We had the same face where we were like, I don't know about this. And then the waitress came out, she's like, oh well. The muscles are, we're not feeling the muscles today,

so they're now shrimp. And we're like, okay. What does that mean? We're not feeling the muscles. She was they're now shrimp. And we're like, okay. What does that mean? We're not feeling the muscles. She was like, they're a little sandy feeling. I don't know, she didn't want, they didn't want to serve the muscles. They were a little salmonella feeling.

I don't know, let's have a look. They were a little black plagus. So, me and Aaron, we just go ahead and order it. Why? Because it was a curiosity thing. We wanted, curious to all survive this. I mean, it was like this big, and we're we're eating it and then we're like what are we it was a thing because we didn't know what we're eating And we opened it up and there there's and there was this log

Never a word. I want to use a log In the food that was like we know that's the thing is we couldn't figure out what it was Please tell me you didn't eat anymore. That's straight from capy himself the thing is we couldn't figure out what it was. Please tell me you didn't need anymore. That's straight from Kappy himself. Kappy, make sure to make all the logs each and every day. So, describe the- Let's go with a Chinese New Year's Christmas app.

It was a brown log, not a turt. Didn't look like a turt, I'm not saying it's a turt. It was like a bread, was it meat- It was a breaded log. And so, we go to the waitress and we were like, the waitress was like, how's everything looking? We were like, it's good. Do you know what this is?

You guys know you're under a bridge, right? You're like, what? It's not a restaurant. Like, it's for crazy people and capy over there. We're like, what is this? And she's like, well, that's the shrimp. And we're like, that's not shrimp. This is the shrimp. that's the shrimp. And we're like, that's not shrimp. This is the shrimp.

This is the shrimp. That's not shrimp. And she's like, that's the pork. That's the pork that I saw at her back there, it was definitely in my, no, no, no, no, no, that's not pork. This is the pork. We don't know what that is.

And she's like, well, jeez, I don't know what that is. Either how did this resolve. How did this resolve? So then she's like, well, let me take a piece of that back to the chef and find out what that, because I don't think that- She took a sample. She's got like a tube and a glove.

She just pulls out. God. And then she was like, because that's not on the menu. Oh my God, how, what happened? So she comes back out, she's like, well, that was a churro. That was a, what? That was an unflavored churro.

That's awesome. I'm trying to get these served churros there. No, I'm trying to get the hell out of that on the menu. I don't know. She was like, that's an unflavored churro. That was in, what did this place sell? I get everything, I guess, in a cramp. Was there a churro store like next door?

And, I'm afraid she's like, but if you guys aren't feeling the Chinese New Year thing, she brought us, she was like, let me get, let me go. She's like, hey, if you guys don't like Chinese people, that's fine, okay? It relax, right? They were really nice.

They brought us, they were like, let me get you some omelets and stuff and then they gave us a pre-desert. It was fine. That's what, right? They were really nice. They brought it, they were like, let me get you some omelets and stuff and then they gave us a pre-desert. It was fine. That's what I'm saying, good food eventually. Good food eventually. I never heard that term before. You just have to get through the first round gauntlet

and then you can get to the good food. Pass the test. Yeah, you can have an omelet. Congratulations. Cap is up there in the back just watching you of wall of monitors, like. Yes. That's why they hide the back.

Yeah. That's actually... Oh my gosh. It's so strange. Why would they serve it? I mean, if they just like recommend you not to have it, why even offer it? I think it was like, they're like,

it's trying to be festive. The thing I didn't understand is I was like, I don't know where the Chinese New Year part came in. It just seems like ears. What it is, what it is. It's pork. It's year, the rooster, I don't know where the Chinese New Year part came in. It just, it was just, what it is. It was just pork. It was year of the rooster, I guess. But it was like one of those things, I think they were just like, well, let's just put stuff in a crate.

These two idiots will never notice. Both looking at their phones. I think it's the same guy. One's like the stretched out version of the other one. Just giving the shit in a door to you. Oh, man. I want to go to Capys now. I want to see this log.

What's the special, I probably, I mean, you have to go wait for another Chinese New Year. You do, they do a mean U-logger in Christmas time, though. Yeah, I make that out. Oh, that's good though. That's good for... Did you guys hang out at Pax Out at all? I mean, we're there for like Friday and then um, beginning of Saturday.

Packed out is like cons light. Hey, no, it's fun. Con, we had a good panel. Shake a lot of hands. Shake a lot of hands. Do you wash? Do you have sanitizer there? Yes.

Yeah, wash your hands. See, shake hands. It's good. It's good. It's good. It's good panel. Oh my gosh. Brandon, what's going on with you?

Brandon, how are things going? I can't stop laughing. This is video that I found of this burglar in England, right? And it adds like one of my most favorite things in life. It's people getting hurt on the internet. He was trying to break into this house and he went through a window on the second floor, but then he got stuck and his ass was just like hanging in the air, also, when they called the authorities.

How did he get stuck? What is he got caught? Did he get like his fat, his fat, his fat, his fat, his fat. Yeah, he got a lot of jokes about location. And then like, yeah, they got a lot of good stuff. Definitely. location and then like yeah, they're they got a lot of good stuff Definitely, that is a flat rich with the jewels and Manchester United, dude, they had a big man is never dying No, she just got to her 65th year as queen. How old is she 422?

She's hard a lot of people don't know that she signed the man. She's never dying. She's gonna live forever. Prince Charles, he has the record for longest waiting to become king. She's got the record of longest monarch. They say he's gonna abdicate. You think so? Just go see. They need to make the brother, the little brother, Henry King. That guy is awesome. I like checking.

Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi?

Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi?

Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? is he the one that dressed up as a Nazi? Is he the one that? Is he the one that and see that. Well, he'll never be your king. It's okay, you have a king. Oh yeah, I forgot. Yeah, you should be a saddest guy with the king you have.

We finally got the monarch we've always wanted. We didn't have that monarchy, but we're finally back. The one that we deserve. Yeah, we got it. Whoa, we got poetic in here. Yeah. No, she's, I what, what is she holding on for at this point? Is all like an awesome and easy her life must be?

Yeah, but like what? You watch the crown? You to just go through a red box every day and be like, man, crap, crap, civil rights, who cares, who cares, who cares. And then going about your queenly day, she really doesn't do anything like she's like it's just a completely presentable. It's a it's a figurehead and that's it. Yeah. Yeah, but there's a lot of figure. I mean, like, it's one of those things that people acknowledge it, then it matters. Like, apparently you have to be president for like three years before you can hang out.

Why? What do you mean? Like, generally she does not see the president of the US for like a few years. Because she's gone through like 30 of them until his presidency. She goes through the West Presence. So you just be like hanging out in London,

like walking around or avoiding her. I'm avoiding the queen. Oh, sorry, this is awkward. I don't want to meet the queen. No, it's just like you're not good enough. Like you can't, like you got to give it time before you're invited. But it's just one of those things

that if people believe in it, then it has value. Yeah, but they don't believe in the Queen anymore. People believe in the Queen. I saw the King's speech, that Stuttering I made a good speech that fired up everybody. You literally just referenced like very old times in the monarchy.

Yeah, but you know, a lot that's old is also new. Yeah, but I'm talking present. Fuck that poetry. I'm talking about a present day. The Queen is basically a pointless position. Well, it's not true. No, it's not. It's been like that for a lot. No, talking about a present day. The Queen is basically a pointless position. Well, it's not true. No, it's not. It's been like that for a while. No, it's for a while. I want to hear a current history lesson of the Queen's duties by Chris Demaris. Well, the past month, she has to swing the whole place.

The whole place. The last time you saw the... She's like the... Like, we have flag. And then they have a, yeah. So when they, it's like, it's like, it's like a red, it's like a red, it's a good example. Right? What did she do for a break? She totally saved them from committing, like, basically country suicide by having them stay in the European, oh, yeah.

She did nothing. She did nothing. The more that is right. The more that is right. The more that is right. And goes around and takes pictures of people and stuff and ways her hand only wears dresses once because she can't wear dresses

when she's pictures to be fair. But the Monarch hasn't had like power for like a couple hundred years. It's power, it's influence. They have more cash in. How is it? It's relative. How is the queen influenced you, Chris?

Not me, I'm not British. But I'm just saying, it's like, I'm not British. But I'm just saying it's like, You, you, you, you, Do you think Gavin wakes up every morning and he's just like, what would the queen do right now? No, it's not that. It's like, if the queen was like, listen, I feel like our country is needs to do this.

Then people will listen. Have you seen British Parliament on TV? I'm not talking about British Parliament, dude. Who are they're the ones that make all the choices? You think like the ways we paint each other. Public opinion is influenced by royalty. By the queen. I think that it's like, it's a figure ahead.

It's, I wanna know where is this, where is this, where is this coming from? Where, where have you gleaned this insight into the British culture from? From what's in his right hand right there? Yeah. Or a little fire his right hand right there. A little fireman's floor there. Are you talking about Queen?

Have you spent a lot of time in England? No. Have you been to England? No. I spent some time. What is your experience with a British Queen country? I mean, I've been to Buckingham Palace. Who?

What's the queen's name. Yeah. Elizabeth. Correct. Good. Good job. Fifth. Elizabeth Fitt.

That's her last name. Is that right? I don't know. In fact, I'm not British. Okay, so I'm saying not. I'm not British. So, we, we a lot about of influence of the queen, Chris. Wait, are you British or not? I'm not clear on it.

I'm just saying, I don't want to disparage the queen. I want to shag. Like Chris just says, I'm not British. I'm just saying, what would I go? Everyone is talking a lot of shit about the queen and I'm just saying what's with it. No one's talking shag. Yes you are. You all are talking, I love the queen.

Who said anything bad about the queen got John the queen like shade Look this guy has not see stuff on his computer though. Did you can't trust him to like like the queen? I'm just saying you I just feel like you're disrespecting the queen and I mean How can I want to know okay Chris? I wonder how I can make amends I Like to put this discord between our two countries to rest and I want to know how I can make amends. I'd like to put this discord between our two countries to rest, and I want to know how I can make reparations to her majesty. Don't ask me as like Gavin or something.

But she have to. That's Gavin. You're the one who has all of the opinions about the queen. Hey, he's not British. I'm like a lawyer for the government. You mean a barrister? Sure. Is that what they're called?

I believe so. I've never seen a change in stuff. I'm saying, which everything that you know about British history culture comes from a movie or TV show That's not true. You've literally referenced everything So not true at all in fact you guys see King's been you guys the James Bond Kingsman You let's change a subject all right, Chris, I'll be right about. So another thing, help you guys out for Valentine's Day, because it's coming up very, very quickly.

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Grab those like CVS truffles. Romantic Christmas. Yeah. I like how the sponsors are all lining up to it's like underwear, flowers, berries. Valentine's Day's hard. It's so good, man. We're getting sexy up in here.

Just missing our Trojan sponsor. The R.T. podcast is just trying to get everyone laid. Yeah, well laid or not mad at. Valentine's Day's hard. It shouldn't be. It's hard. It shouldn't be. It's tough. It shouldn't be. For me, it's two days after my birthday too.

So it's like, you know, can't enjoy my birthday. I gotta be focused. I gotta plan ahead. Nah. Get all this to find out. I disagree with that. Why? Valentine's Day should not be something where a guy in a heterosexual

agent with a woman should be just completely pushed into having to do some sort of big hall of blue every single year. So what's the quality change? How do we change the sales for homosexuals? I'm saying that Valentine's Day is just like, it's another like, it's patriarchy. How do we change it? How do we change it? No, what?

All it is is just keeping the same thing where it's like the guy has to do something for the girl for this holiday and her to keep her happy and the girl has the way for the guy to do it. I'm like, well, why? Well, girls can do nice things. Yeah. Yeah. for the girl for this holiday and her to keep her happy and the girl has the way for the guy to do it. I'm like, well, why? Why? Well, girls can do nice things. Yeah. Yeah. But you just said that, you just said for you,

even it's two days after your birthday, a time of year that should be celebrated, you can't have fun for your birthday because you have to be set up to do something for Valentine's Day for your wife. I don't think it can have fun, but it's like you can't focus on you. You just like already have to be planning

because you don't want to disappoint somebody. Like, yeah, granted, it exists. You can't do anything about it, but it still creates expectations. And you don't want to disappoint somebody. Like yeah, granted, it exists. You can't do anything about it, but it still creates expectations, and you don't want to disappoint somebody. I call holidays where you have to be stressed out about bullshit. What, how do you fix it?

And what would you do? Guys, just get a card, you know? You don't have to kill yourselves, or get a card, ladies like that. Or Sherry's Barriers. Or Sherry's Barriers. Get the barrier, get the barrier. I was just talking to the flowers.

I will agree. Sherry's Barriers are a good solution for the Valentine situation, but I do not, I would I, what I'm commenting on is the whole like that it's the guys responsible. I'm Valentine's day. I do something for the girl. I think girls do a lot of stuff for that. That's the one that was invented by the greeting card industry, right?

No, pretty sure. Fountains day. I don't know. Who could? I can't remember. I get the two mixed up. I think Cinco de Mayo, the core beer company. I'm not invented, because it existed, but like made into like a holiday,

an American holiday, it's just like to sell beer. If Valentine's Cinco de Mayo, yeah, which is what, Brandon? It celebrates a victory of the Mexican army against the French. Ah boy, not even their independence, right? Not even their independence. That's why people in Mexico do not give a shit

about Cinco de Mayo. That's that's 17th of December that that is their independence Mexican. No idea. Is, right? Not even their independence. That's why people in Mexico do not give a shit about things of the time. That's 17th of December that is their independence. Mexican- No idea. Is that right? And it won't be a lot of independence day. What's that? Well, beer company?

I think it's course. And that's a weird beer. That's a nice notion. Oh. Well, you're saying course started, sinko to my own? Yeah. Or like made it a thing? Yeah, like the same way that you're saying

greeting companies Valentine's Day at Cores did. And I don't remember. I'm okay with corporations starting holidays. Yeah, I'm okay with that. What would you like to see Chris? What corporation would you like to see? What holiday could they create? I don't.

Hmm. Well, it's a good corporation that hasn't started a holiday. Oh, pick one. Office Trojan Depot. Office Depot, they could create like a pencil holiday. Oh, pick one. Uh, office Trojan depot. Um, office depot, they could create like a pencil holiday. Like out of everything, we got to push these pencils. I know, I will say this. Get the lead out. Admin's pencil day, everybody with advent of computers. A lot people, people are buying a lot less pencils. That was a, yeah, I would agree. And if there was some holiday,

you are sticking to this two finger thing to all the way through pencils. I'm following it with the two fingers. Chris is going for power. Like an art holiday. That's what it is. It's an art holiday. It's a draw, draw thing for your friend day.

For friend, not for a girlfriend, just like a buddy. Exactly, it's a buddy. In a show up one day, you're gonna be like, John, I drew this top. No, that's not that, it has to be best friend. Because there has to be a feeling of obligation. That puts a lot of pressure though, because you're like,

I don't know if we're best friends and he's kind of friends. Well, no, it's like, you're my best friend, but you don't know if it's true. And you draw something for your best friend. I have to say that I was wrong. Patrick says it was Aniser Bush and Miller developed a marketing team for Sink of the Mile and not course.

I actually heard that if you checked the tapes, I actually said that, sorry, if you checked the tapes but nobody was listening to me. But well, people don't use tapes anymore. So. They use pencils to write everything down. So pencil day, pencil day, I'll just call it pencil day. We sell them.

Well, no, you already said it. It's fine. That's the marketing idea behind it. It's to sell pencils. The day has to be something. No, which is coming up. It's like a lobby day. It's like a micro-end day.

Best friend day. There's not a best friend day. Pretty sure there is. That's probably one of those days. There's a holiday forever. Yeah, like the new holidays, you're gonna be like, hey, it's not a holiday. Well, they have marketed it properly.

But seriously though, how do you know, like how do you approach it with a friend? If you don't know that they think you're their best friend. Well, how do you approach a potential sexual partner as being like, are you having sex? No, that's wrong. I don't know what you're talking about. I just have sex with my friends if I want.

Okay, well then maybe you should get them something for Valentine's. Yeah, it might be nice. Or maybe get them some pencil drawings. At least some pencil shavings are nice. You can just bring them on the bed. I'm just saying, let me find my- I have a question.

I have a question. I have a question. Speaking of holidays and wastefulness, right? What's, do you, okay, pumpkins are edible food, right? Yeah, yeah. What do you think third world countries think about? No, they're not edible food. What do you think third world countries think

about pumpkins and Halloween? What do you think they think of smashing pumpkins? Is that a little more wasteful? It's, well, it's the same. We're carving pumpkin. We're essentially carving food as decoration. And we're letting it rot. It's number 30 on the list of the wasteful things

that Americans do all year long. You could scoop out that and make the pie or the dish from the dinner. No one does that. And even then, you could also eat the innards. The shit, like what do you do? So are you proposing? Well, not even not even the seeds of rain. The pumpkin, like the innards. The shit, like what do you mean? So are you proposing, donate? Well, not even not even the it with leaves while we're growing it to keep it white.

If it is not covered and turns yellow, changing its flavor or nutrition not at all, it cannot be sold in size. Why? Because no one will buy it. Because one thing said, cauliflower is supposed to be white. But why? Because that's what we've learned to do. I don't know. But who is the first person to the queen of England? Well, I wouldn't be surprised because she has influence. And she could get those things done.

She's an influencer for sure. Why didn't she tell the queen to tell people to eat your cauliflower? Why are we covering up her cauliflower? I don't know. It was that somewhere in the long line, someone figured out that white cauliflower sells better and so now you can only put a cauliflower. I don't know. It was that as somewhere in the long line, someone figured out that white cauliflower sells better and so now you can only sell white cauliflower.

Well, they just have bad marketing. Agreed. They could remarket as like a new type of phone. I'm not saying this is a good thing. I'm saying this is a good thing. I'm saying I think we could do this. All right, so what do you want to know? How are we going to fix this?

We just have to find a marketing, like, so we're going to launch a marketing campaign that what is spins a positive look? It has to seem like a special type of cauliflower. Ooh, like super food. Exactly, it's like healthier. Oh, we're gonna go all natural. It's all natural cauliflower. Oh, that connection.

The gluten free cauliflower. People are idiots when it comes to their food. And then also it's all natural. It's no longer, it's not bleached. It's not a die. You gotta add, so this is like, you gotta add a word to cauliflower. I got it.

You go, arsenic-free cauliflower. Right? And it happens to be yellow. People will be like, they'll be like, white has, or something like alpha cauliflower. A cauliflower prime is what we're eating now. No, because that's the, I'm saying like, you add a word to it.

You know, I like the arson one, that's great. Arsonic. Yeah, not, I was just in free call, but will not light your house on fire. Arsonic free, Arsonic and bleach free cauliflower. Yeah.

No, I'm actually with you now. You could easily, if you spun it in a way that totally played on people's ignorance with food, you could make it in a way that totally played on people's ignorance with food, you could make it into the new superfood. And then all of a sudden, you slowly phase out white cauliflower and all of a sudden, you have yellow cauliflower.

Because I like to think you're gonna sell like all your assets, put all your money in cauliflower. You can go all in. Put it in the cauliflower. This is it. It's hot. Patrick found the actual top five things that are wasted, top five foods in America.

Number five, apples. How are we wasting these? Are we giving them to three potatoes? Cheese is wasted. Milk. And the number one thing that we waste, bread, I understand that, because sometimes I look at my cabinet,

I have like two breads, two like giant loaves of bread, and they're mildew, mildewy. But so here's the deal, that's food waste. Is loves the bread, and they're mild though, mildly. But so here's the deal, that's food like is when you buy food and it just goes back to the kitchen. Those are just the things, that's the reason those are the most wasted are those are the things that people buy the most. You talk bread, cheese, milk, what was it?

Apples. Apples, like those are just things that people, yes, and people buy the most pumpkins on Halloween. I bet you the most wasted food in the month of October. Is the pumpkin one. I still have pumpkin. From a grocery store? From a grocery store.

Why? We all make mistakes when we were young. What was it like, were you stealing it to smash it or stealing it? I think I carved it. How? Wait, it was so was the big one. So we got like a really small ones.

I think a friend of mine The Halloween. Wait, it was so was the big one. So we got like a really small one. So we got like a really small one. I think a friend of mine and I got in my car at like two in the morning went to the local Albertans in California and stole like what city. What city. Just wondering. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, Didn Albertans go bankrupt? Did they?

Oh, I'm just like, I'm like, I'm stupid. I'm stupid. I'm stupid. I like Albertans. Uh, no, yeah, we stole probably like two or three pumpkins. uh... uh... uh... did an albarsons go bankrupt did they uh... a lot of and deep and that i liked albarsons uh... no yet we still probably like to work with the big where they got no because this is why there's our master high-span the guard was a scarecrow

they do that a lot they had a display of pumpkins like they do often in grocery stores which is outside and it's just a giant crate of pumpkins and they don't take it inside it when the nights over so they leave them outside. So it's literally just a pile of pumpkins outside and in a closed store. Huge waste of food. Chris, how many pumpkins do you think are wasted?

Like, and pounds, like how much? And pounds are 10. He's not English, dude. He doesn't know pounds. How many dollars worth? No, no, no, wait, like, or how many tons, if that helps you think of that? No, pounds, let me do pounds.

It's just 10 million pounds. Jesus, no. How many? It's 36,000 pounds. He's a little off. What? In what the nation? 18 tons of pounds, 18 tons of pumpkins.

In America. On Halloween probably in America. I that's wrong Million pounds those are alternative facts. I said 10 million Tell me you have any idea how much food that is that's a nap Chris thinks big y'all yeah, I disagree with that number You disagree with it like what were we're that's an option of people that's not where these facts coming That's an option these are alternative packages. You can just say these are all I disagree with it like who were we that's an option out people that's not where these facts coming that's not These are alternative packages. You can just say these are all I disagree with that answer do it right 18,000 tons That doesn't sound like a lot of ways to you 18,000 tons. Yeah, that's be 36,000 pounds right? No

1800 tons 18,000 is it 2000 pounds 18,000 10 2000 is not 36,000. That's 300 600 million. A lot of zeros add allow those zeros. Yeah, see I did I not disagree correctly? I don't know how to answer that. That's one of those yes you did not disagree incorrectly.

Yeah, I want why are we talking about questions? I'm confused. How did we get it? I Damn it. Yes, yes, that's right. You're um fuck. What is it? What is it? What I said that there's like I knew Yeah, I knew that was not enough. What is it close to 10 million? We'll see. I'm like, what's the no? There's a real thirst for this kind of stuff. We'll see.

God damn it. That's kind of a really sad time in your life when you get an argument with Christa Marius and he's right. That happens a lot. No, my fucking math was way point. It's 3.6 million pounds. And you were a second ago.

I know. You were like, two million pounds will feel better. I'm not gonna hear the end of it. You said 10 million. You were still off by 75%. All right, but I'm still like, I still was not as bad off as it is. Brandon was worse.

I don't care if I was wrong. Brandon was more wrong. I think you're both wrong for having this argument right now. And everyone listening right now is wrong. We're still tuning in for this. Yeah, I checked out. Brandon was super wrong. We're still tuning in for this. Yeah, I checked out. Right, it was super wrong.

Yes, yes, that was. 36,000 pounds. Yes, that's it. I, you're, yes. That's like embarrassing. Really, that's what I'm gonna go home tonight. I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like,

I'm gonna be up in a minute. How much is the pumpkin away? How much is the pumpkin away? Is that what it is? How much is the pumpkin away? How big is the pumpkin? Just average pumpkin. Do you guys think the headless horseman

gets pissed off and you hear about, oh, he's like, oh, they're wasting all these pumpkins, so many potential heads. No, if a pumpkin is eight pounds, how many pumpkins is 36,000? Well, I have to do the math portion. I have to do the math portion of the RT podcast.

Yeah, can we try the pumpkin? If there's some segue, all right, that will get us off of talking about pumpkins and wait. All right, fine. There's not much out there anymore to talk about. Now I know why people think I'm an angry person is because I yell out stuff like that. You're surrounded by. I'm trying to take a while.

Why is John? We need a new idiot. Come on. I'll see if I have any other thoughts. I would love it. When you you have a list of thoughts. Yeah, I covered one it come on. I'll see if I have any other thoughts. I would love it When you you have a list of thoughts One through ten pumpkins you've covered all your thoughts to a bicycle accident yesterday It had half time and the super ball that where the boo boo's came from yeah, I got him all over my body actually What'd you do? I was at a party? I rode my bike like 10 miles to it and then I was like oh the Falcons are clearly gonna win

I'm gonna go home. I had a couple drinks, it was in the dark, and it was on the path. We have good bike pass in the city. I just ate it on a bike path. And I almost broke things. My pants were shredded, and I got home, and I was like bleeding and dirty.

And my girlfriend was like, what kind of party was this? What are you doing? That's an opportunity to come up with a really good story though. No, I was just like, I fell. I fell. And then I like turn on the Super Bowl. And I'm a court-cutter, so I don't have a cable.

I watched it on Go 90, actually. In the bathtub, because they have good NFL stuff. In the bathtub? Yeah, in the bathtub. And they lost. The New England 1% or England one percenters won. Again. Yeah.

I just thought we were bringing out random stuff. I just knew that thing. Did you do that thing when you fell, when you immediately got up and looked around and saw it, see if anybody saw you? No, what I did is I screamed like a horrible, like I was getting stabbed, because it hurt so bad.

And then I got my bike light off my bike and had to look at all the injuries I had to make sure I wasn't like my bone anywhere or anything like I wiped out Do you is it a weird thing to ask someone there about the injuries? No, it's like it's someone has like a thing on their arm Well, the only good thing about getting injured But like could you have you know, I have a bruise this size on my leg, but it's in my mind.

Is that a Wendy's area? Yeah, a P Wendy's area. But like, is it a weird thing to be like, what's that bruise from? I don't think so. Is that a faux pas? Like a social faux pas? I think if, it depends on,

we gotta read the room, dude. Are they flaunting it? Well, I don't know if anyone's flaunting. Oh, yeah, no, you can flaunt it People like these scrapes. You just like Want people to ask you my skin tone? Yeah, I mean like a Todd was doing the podcast with this, you know, like some people like they want you to ask those questions I found I found a a lump the other day scared me

Was it in my groin area? Oh, I well, so you get sorted out? I apparently Chris doesn't carry about to go No, I thought of another I just Confessed I had a lump in a very scary Pumpkin get wasted during no members. No, but tell me about your lump. No, what do you hear your story Chris? No? I want to hear about your lump. Give me your lump. Did it turn out that the lump was just a bug who had burrowed in there and became a mom? Was it a mistestosterone injection? Yeah, I shoved my needle right into my groin and just shoved a bunch of testosterone in there. Tell me what your lump.

There's parts of the body and there's that are bad to discover stuff and there's certain shapes things that's bad to discover stuff and a lump is never really good. There's never a good lump. Did you check the other side? That's what it was. It was in a spot. It had one on the other side. I think I was like laying in bed,

and I think I went to scratch or something like right here in the groin area. And I was like, well, that feels different than this side. And it was like a raised lump right between the groin and the thigh. That's a lift node, right? That's what it turned out to be, but I didn't know that could be a thing.

I didn't know. Do you have the internet at home? Well, that's what, but. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, you're always gonna die. Yeah, so I, do you mean web MD? What did I say? Chasm MD. No, I did try to do that thing where you try to look up stuff and you don't look at the worst thing possibly. Like, well, what's a possibility down the line?

And like, I was looking at hernias, which was also terrible. It's terrible to try to diagnose something you have because you try to find a picture of something you have and you have to sift through other people who have posted other lumps that you don't want to see. And so I'm looking through them like finding like, is it a hernia? There's different kinds of hernias. Some hernias can be caused not even by lifting and so I was like, what is it?

And so I just like, it didn't hurt like at all, unless I really put a lot of pressure on it. I've actually had the exact same thing and I know that's why I knew it was a lymph node. Because if she went to a doctor, I was like, I've got the cancer. That please put me out of my misery. It did, it scared me to lose. I've been here in Austin for almost four years, and I don't have a general doctor. I just have my specialist that I go to for the testosterone thing. I don't have a general doctor.

I was like, I should probably get one to check this kind of stuff out. So I made an appointment and waited a week and just kept an eye on it. That's the worst part. Is they do a biopsy and they're like, no, I'm sorry. You're gonna have to like sweat this one out. There should be something that requires a kind of test that says if you're gonna, you can die. Yeah. They have to do it immediately.

It was what, by the time it was like- Go behind the curtain. The appointment wasn't for like a week, so I just kept an eye on it. It didn't grow. It didn't shift. And then it like like by the time I got to the doctor It was basically almost gone and she's like gabs like lymph node even one I think one of the guys here in broadcast when I brought it up was like gas a lymph node But I didn't know and I actually had like swollen glands appear at the time

But I didn't know you could like get a swollen gland and you're growing. That's not cool. Did you post a photo of it online? One of those not What is this? Well because it was even if I wanted to it wasn't even that visibly noticeable I love it online, I love one of those about that. I did not. I did not. What is this? Well, because it wasn't, even if I wanted to, it wasn't even that visibly noticeable. One of the things are only you knowing your body. You did one of those 50-50 deals.

Weird lump on my groin or potato that looks like Nixon. That was scary. It was scary to be sitting in my bed, you know, like just by myself one morning being like, on my head cancer. Yeah, the worst part of the day, like, oh, we'll call you Wednesday. myself one morning being like, I might head cancer. Yeah, the worst part of the like, oh, we'll call you Wednesday. And then you're like watching the clock and it's 459. And you're like, we can't go like they're like fretting over calling. You're like, we can't call them now. It's the end of the day.

It'll ruin his weekend. This way. I have a, I have a girl doctor. First of all, if I had a general practitioner, he's a girl doctor. Mm-hmm. You have a girl doctor, be your general doctor. I don't believe you. I hate what?

Yeah, it's nice to come to your fingers while you do that. It depends, it depends what, what, like general or... general, like, like, any time, anything I have a problem with my body, like if not for the fact that I had, this is another fun part of my condition, I get my growing checked all the time, it's fantastic. But if not for the fact that I just had, like, my general, This is another fun part of my condition. I get my growing checked all the time. It's fantastic. But if not for the fact that I just had,

like my general, my specialist doctor checked my growing, she was like, she wanted to do a full body check because I hadn't gotten a check up in like five years. She's like, have you had that area checked for us? I was like, yeah, I have, but I don't know. Like, I've never had a girl. Not my little daughter. Yeah.

I was saying, no, I haven't had a girl do it. What's that like? They're gonna start talking about you in like female doctors of Austin chat rooms. This guy wants me to feel his green hair. It's got a weird length. No, it seems weird. I did have to get it, what's the a tetanus shot?

Yeah, those were fun. That's good though. That was hurt. They do, but actually the funny thing is that those heard about as much as my testosterone shots. I might have talked about this on the podcast before, but as far as weird injuries, I once had... I can't believe you're still doing that two finger pointing thing. He's really consistent.

I've committed. He has kept up on that finger. I was eating a french fries and it was like on a date type thing. What's a date type thing? Oh, it was a date, not like a full date, but it was like hanging out with a girl, right? She was about to get abducted. Yeah. She did not know it was going to's a date type thing? Oh, I was a date, not like full date, but it really hanging out with a girl, right? She was about to get abducted. Yeah, she did not know it was going to be a date. Yeah.

Which is a full date means like, it's just a nice restaurant. It wasn't a one-on-one thing. It was like a more hangout thing, but it was like, yeah. Anyway, so I was eating French fries and the girl was like, oh, I want some fries. And then she like tried to bite the fries out of my mouth. What?

Lady in the tramp stop? Yeah, yeah. But she missed and then bit my lip. And I'm not talking about like, ow, I mean, ow. There's a lot of blood and there's a hole in my lip. How did she miss? Well, it's like, I mean, did you like jerk and move the brain?

How long do you have to chew to like get through a French fry too? Was she like, I'm not a French fry before. I mean, there's also like people been drinking and stuff, so it was kind of like a drunk and like, peep chomp. Oh, bad thing. I mean, once it's like, it had this like, huge gaping like thing in my lip.

And I was like, I had to like, it was one of those things where I'd meet someone and I'd be like, so this is my girlfriend, my friend, I can't stop looking at the lips. Let me go back two weeks here. Yeah, and I had to, I feel like I had to explain like why I had this like weird thing on my lip. I love to know her thought,

prox to have a scat. And she's just like, I'm gonna make a move on this guy. It's probably for a while, it did, I don't know. We come at him with my massive jaws and rip his fly out as mal. Did you, um, did you guys hit it off? And that was the start of a great relationship. Yeah, did you, I'm getting at it. And did you like end up making out with her?

You're like, you break it. Why could make out that day because I was like, you break it, you buy it. That's what you tell her. Did you eventually close the deal? I'm not gonna go in it. Did you make out? Just tell us to close the deal.

We don't know who it is. Keep it a mask in. Keep it light. Did you make out with Just tell us to close it in. We don't know who it is. He's a maskant. Keep it light. Did you make out with her? Yes, we made it. Eventually or that night? That means that they said had sex. That means they had sex.

This guy never has sex. No, look at his face. Look at him. He knows it. Look. Wait, wait, what? What? You're gonna.

You're here. That's good news for you. You're gonna wait to June. Wait to June. He's married, so you know he doesn't. it's like you push the lymphote in his dick It's hard. What was that word? So you made out to that night Yeah, we messed her I'm not gonna go to you had sex that night with a bloody lip

No, yep, yeah,. Look at that stupid smile. That's in like the pickup. Look at it. Look at this smile. This is the smile of someone who had sex that night. You got it. That's actually the appendix to like the pickup artist. He's like, try this.

Tell them they have a cool necklace and then get them to buy them French fraddy. Yeah. But then put your lip in the wire. Why are you so stupid? I'm so stupid right now, but having sex? I don't like, I don't like kitsing and biting and telling. So do you think that was part of why it worked?

Like in the future, were you like, purposely trying to get a girl to accidentally bite you? I've never had to. No, no, not like that kind of. What's your fetish, Chris? Hey, oops. Oh, he has a fetish. I wanna know what this is. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm going to do that. I don't know. I mean I don't really I just I like boobs a toast

I'll tie say you toes got in time Let's let's let's let's let's delve into this what what does Chris like? I mean, I just like girls and I just like girls and girls and boobs. Please try to tone down the steaminess of this. What's your fetish, Sean? I've been trying to figure that out. I feel like there's a fetish somewhere inside of me and I just haven't found it yet. So I feel like I'm gonna have an awakening at some point.

Every night you go home, you just try a different thing on your body. That's scary. You're like, no, this is scary. I mean, I guess there's stuff you try out. You get close, you're like crossing off stuff from a post list. I mean, just go down the holes and try try them all out you walk away and then all of a sudden a butt plug like falls out of your jeans You're like oh, this is I haven't had a butt plug yet

Where do you buy butt plugs you buy a butt plug anywhere? Could you buy it on Amazon right here? Yeah, but I got anything No, I see the video I don't know anything. Um, nope, nope. I've seen a video about that. I got asked that. I got asked that. And I actually like, let's show you that video.

I wish I had an answer. I don't really, I don't really, I can't, I can't, I haven't figured out what my, but I feel like everyone has a fetish and you just haven't figured out you just haven't like, just give it time guys. Yeah, I think so. It's like the more. It's like the more you figured out your fetish yet. Oh, yeah.

What's your fetish? I got to kill a mermaid before I. I have to deal with it. It's a lot of work up front. It's a mythical creature to leave. Yeah. You find it like the Harry Potter tears thing. I get the death, like the death rattle of a mermaid.

I'm like, ah, yes, finding. You find it in necessity. It's like the more desensitized you get to everything else, the more you just kinda like, oh man, I gotta find something in the way. Is public affection a fetish? Like, you or something? No.

Well, like, yeah, PDA, or getting a little bit of that. I think you have to, like, doing fun stuff out and if it's very specific. Like, if it's like, yeah, I like it. Here in Ocean, and jobs in Subway, that would be a fetish. If it's like, the more specific it is, the more likely. It's like, no, no. You're not saying you like that, kind of? Yeah, I'm thinking, that's exciting. Wow. It's like, it's like, the more likely it's it's like, John, I'm saying you like that kind of?

Yeah, I'm thinking that that's exciting. Wow. It's like, what's, what's like? What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex? That was a lot of weird places. I, again, I know we said I haven't been a very sexually active person my life. I think we talked about this on a barb show,

always open, but what's the weirdest place besides the bedroom? God, nothing really exciting. Nothing, I really think. Car or... You haven't had sex in a car? I've had sex in a car. I'm saying that like cars and... You can make it car can be exciting if it's parked in an interesting place. The idea of the car is way better than the practical application.

Cars never turn out to be that amazing. Does your roommates bed count? No, that's not interesting. That's just, haven't had sex in Bernie's house yet. Well, I haven't either. I mean, I don't think... I just say that because I'm watching his house right now. Yes, cameras all around here.

What a... Do you guys? Try and think the weirdest place for that stuff. Chuckie cheese. They still don't do that. But he's also not allowed back in them. Have you ever had sex in someone else's house? It's weird, though.

I'll tell you what, pretending to be one of the animatiles. Yeah, he actually really had sex in someone else's house. I don't think I don't know. I'm the fucka sir, his kids. Happy birthday. Birthday, birthday, birthday, birthday. That's gross. Because he's, it's a, I really, I really need to step up.

I'm engaged to be wet. I can't have these disgusting comments, talks. How do you like, how do you get along with your getting close to not having said it? He's truth, yeah. Fatherhood. Father-in-law. Uh, it's cool. It's very cool.

You don't want to, he listens to cool music. Wait, it's like, imagine, you hear this? It changes a little after you're married. My father-in-law lost on my son, my Christmas. We got a dog and he's kind of disappointed because he feels like that delay is when we get kids. And he's looking to me, he's like, no one's wrong. He's like, you got to get on that.

You got to have kids. He's like, he's dead man. I got to go in the other room and hit that right now. Like secretly impregnate her. Yeah, you got to get it. I forgot to con him. he's like you gotta it's like you gotta get on it like it feels strange It felt very strange. Well, is it do you think do you think since you got married that he's come to like accept you and embrace you more? I mean he's come to accept your penis. He has you know, he's dealt with it He's dealt with her. He tries man like I didn't know what to get him for Christmas.

So I'm like, you know what, would be cool, like a really awesome knife. Like an awesome, really cool knife, and you get a knife. So he like opened it. And this is a good knife. This is a brand. It's a weird gift.

Nice, I remember the office when you were kicking around ideas. Yeah, I was like, I don't know. I got him a knife. And then he like, he got off the list before a knife was landed on. He was like a knife was landed on and he like was trying to figure out a close it And then he like sliced his finger and started bleeding on the couch Damn it is like father-in-law's heart at least he didn't do that. That's not a knife. There's a knife This is a knife. I thought this is a knife. I cut myself with it

There's a knife. Yeah, this is a knife. I thought this is a knife. I cut myself with it. Oh, wow Maybe it's a power play. I mean like I'm giving you a knife. Nice a weird gift to give that is a weird gift Really? You want it to be blood brothers? Is that really nice? Yes, that's a super weird gift, dude I mean it's it's only not a weird gift a weapon, but it's not it's like you know It's like he serves the utility purpose to what kind of knife was it? It's a fancy one. It's father-naused all man all manly. I just wait. I don't just go like by like a machete We have pocket knives. We have butterfly knives. We have fancy knives. Okay, let me look it up You buy you buy you hear this knife and you're like that's a fancy knife for like a 12-year-old

No, it's a knife that you would wear with black tie is what you would do to You'd have for like a kid. It's like a cool thing. A Gerber. Apparently Gerber. Good knife. They got the best. They got the best. They do baby stuff in that. Same building. Same building. Yeah. They make bottles and it's just a weird. It is a really weird gift. The sharpest knives on the market. You have to wonder. That's a weird gift. I don't know, man. How much was it? I got him a syringe. Okay. I got him a syringe. Why is that? It was it was $90. So I figured you know what? It's like over $70. Let me see. Nice. But you know what? I don't think that looks like. Yeah. Spin it. That doesn't look like he's been a hundred. Let me get it. I can get

it on the Apple TV. Make sure you're going to get him a gun. It doesn't look like he spent a hundred dollars on that If he knows the Gerber Nating but he and the Gerber reputation Then I'll share he'll appreciate it Well, now he knows it sharp, but Yeah, it's just it's just Brandon. That's a whole man. Oh, okay. What what's the best? What do you get? Really nice whiskey alcohol is a a good, good direction. No, but I mean, I don't know if you could have taken that across the border. All right, maybe.

So holder for his night. Get him. Can I do you have it on Apple TV? Are you trying to show off the knife that you bought? Nope, don't have it. I can't. I'm not sure. Arrival, been meaning to see that.

It's a good one. I grew up on the border of Texas and Mexico. I grew up in El Paso. We used to go over to Juatas when we would want it And we would buy knives, but it would be like a switchblade and like things that are illegal. Yeah, so I have a couple of those You can get them real cheap across the border. Yeah, I just didn't do that. Yeah, he could he could he could get cheaper I'm gonna brownsville. I had a lot of thing. I just thought I was like let me just look for stuff that's over like 90 bucks And I was like knife, right just look for stuff that's over like 90 bucks. And I was like, knife. All right.

That's a really, I don't know, man. I don't think it was that bad. I got a knife for being in someone's wedding ones, but that everyone got, it was like a pocket knife. A watch that everyone had their name on a watch. Am I wedding? I'm just gonna give out like cyanide pills. Like if you want to opt out, then just,

it's on you before it. Well, I don't know. I don't know if I can get it on the screens to people to see it, but like that's it. I mean, it's a good looking knife. It's not a knife. It's not a knife. But it's a good thing.

It's not a knife. It's not a knife. But it's a good thing. But there are so many knives like that. What would you get your father-in-law? I took the bottle whiskey or like, let me think second. I mean, anything other than that.

It's actually a good idea. 90 dollar bottle of alcohol. That found his alcohol. Or like some really nice, like what is he like? Does he like to smoke cigars? Some really nice cigars. No, I don't think much of alcohol.

I got him other stuff. He likes to bike. I got him like, you know, restaurant gift card. And then like, I'm not that. He's like a named. Golden Coral gift card.

I like Golden Coral. Please tell us. Like for $90 you could have gotten like a fit bit or something that's like practical and like oh yeah that's too tech heavy. I like to give somebody like hey you figure this out. What message does a knife send as a gift though? It is. It's like it's like it's like it's like Brandon's trying too hard. Anyone else here who have father in law? Who, and anyone else have ever bought their father in law?

No, not you, because you already disagree. You ever bought him a gift? Gift ideas? Is anyone ever bought a knife for someone else? For a father in law? For a special someone in your law? Who, who are these? So we have some people in the control.

I'm gonna share his berries next time. I'm gonna look up gifts for father-in-laws, and you know what knives aren't gonna be there. How about your knives gonna be eight or above? Number eight or above? It was a weird game of family feud. Everybody just take a few minutes to zone out on your own phone or device.

I'm sending to the future. Whiskey was number one. A dartboard. Ooh, dartboard's not bad. Plura Form and a rag. A hat. Like what list is that? Jin. I mean, nowhere do I see your knife.

It wasn't number eight. No, it wasn't a list. It was just like, I'm just saying, it's a weird gift, dude. I'm sorry. Like it really is a weird one. Yeah, but Brandon, it's in character. What did you get in here? And you encourage this. Yeah. Like it really is a weird Brandon. It's in character And you encourage this yeah, you encourage I just trying to get him to go away

Just let it happen and I'm not responsible for what would you get your mother-in-law? nine we Thought I was gonna go weed nice We thought I was gonna go weed. Some, but I got plenty down there. Finging. Nice. And I don't, why did you say that in slow motion? Because I was hoping if I just took a while to say it, I would remember it by the time I got to the end of the sentence.

And she was probably like, Oh, me, oh, this is so wonderful. I love this. Thank you, but I guess. It was something nice. It wasn't a knife. That would be weird. Right, that's what I knife. That would be weird.

Right, the fun. It would be funny, whenever you got her, she did the same thing. Like if you got her like kitchen gloves, she was like, oh, I cut myself. We're the cut yourself on a gift family, you're welcome. Do we? All right.

I think we've run the course. Yeah, I've had a, I've had quite a podcast. The fucking ton thing, that's gonna, that's gonna hurt. All right, thank you so much for watching quite a podcast. The fucking ton thing, that's gonna hurt. All right, thank you so much for watching the RT Podcast this week. Stay tuned because the Tri-hard podcast is coming up next. You can also watch the post show. I think so.

I'm a first member of RootCy.com slash first. RootCy.com slash first. So thank you so much guys. Have a great day. Bye. Bye, Bye. Bye. Bye.

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