rSlash - r/AmITheA--Hole for Getting My Husband Arrested?

Episode Date: September 28, 2022

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Welcome to R-slash. Am I the butthole where OP calls the cops on her own husband? Today's episode is sponsored by Honey. I don't know about you, but I do literally 100% of my shopping online. Because of COVID, I pretty much have to shop online because yeah, I don't want to catch COVID and die. But on top of that, I read stories for a living, so I can't afford to sound like this for three weeks straight. Don't you hate it when you get to checkout and you don't have a code to put in that little promo code box? With honey, you never have to leave that box empty. Honey is a free shopping tool that scours the internet for promo codes and automatically

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That's joinhoney.com slash r slash that's join honey.com slash r slash. Am I the butthole for calling the cops on my husband after I found out that he was hiding my son's motorcycle? I got my son a $7,000 motorcycle for his 18th birthday this past June. My son is obsessed with automobiles and loves motorcycles. In his room, he has models and posters of motorcycles of all types. His biological dad passed away when he was just 12. Now, I'm married to my current husband who has kids of his own. My husband has always been against my son's interest in motorcycles. He thinks that I'm encouraging him to be reckless, distracting him from school, and by extension his future, and spoiling him and blowing money by spending $7,000 on a motorcycle. This has caused some tension between him and my son, so I told my husband to stop complaining

about it. Around two weeks ago, my son's motorcycle went missing. We opened a police report, but nothing came of it. It just disappeared. My husband had a smirk on his face the entire time just walking around saying, I told you so, you just wasted your money. To be quite honest, this was unbearable to hear. My mother-in-law visited a few days ago. She was talking about the other house that my husband owns, and she mentioned seeing a motorcycle in the garage while she was cleaning it.

One that was similar to the one that we lost. I was puzzled, and I asked if she was certain, but she showed me a photo that she took of it, which confirmed that, indeed, it was my son's motorcycle. I immediately rushed to call my husband and confront him about it. He admitted that he took and hid the motorcycle and his garage as a last resort after me and his stepson kept brushing him and his thoughts off about the $7,000 being spent on something unnecessary and that could cause issues. I blew up at him, demanding that he return it. He refused and told me that he had been considering selling it and giving the money back to me so you could use it wisely this time.

I told him that I was serious and that I'd call the cops. He literally said, this is a family matter and cops can't do anything about it. I'd had enough, so I called the cops as soon as I ended the call with him. The cops found the motorcycle and returned it, but my husband had to be taken in since there was an open file about the motorcycle going missing. He was let go eventually, but he was livid with me. He came home yelling about how awful what I did was and how crazy my behavior was. I refused to engage in the argument, but he told his entire family about it, and now they're

judging me for calling the cops on my own husband, even though I already asked him to return the motorcycle. He said that he was just looking out for my son, and that one day we'll realize that he was right, but only when it's too late. My son isn't speaking to me or my husband. I feel horrible about this whole situation, and I'm starting to think that I handled this the wrong way. Yo, what? This guy literally stole a $7,000 item from his family member and he's planning on selling it. All of this in the name of teaching a lesson,

teaching a lesson to an 18 year old by the way, a grown adult. Opie, honestly, you've got to be considering divorce at this point, right? This behavior is extremely toxic and controlling. He manipulated both you and your son and literally lied to your face. Then, when you called him out on his lie, he doubled down and refused to return the stolen property. It's not his, it's not even yours, it's your son's.

So yeah, OP, I think you're completely justified in calling the cops on this douchebag. After calling the cops, your second call should be to a divorce attorney. OP, you and your son get zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving your husband three out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for telling my sister-in-law that she upstaged me at my wedding?

I'm a 30-year-old woman, and I recently got married to Matt. Matt has a step-sister, Tiffany, who's 28. I've met her less than 10 times in the five years that I've dated Matt because she doesn't live nearby and she's not close to my husband. However, she was invited to our wedding. I should mention that Tiffany is very attractive. She's pretty with a currently fashionable body type. She also dresses well and spends money on her appearance. This is well known, and even though I've only met her a few times, whenever she's brought up by my in-laws, she's always mentioned as being very invested in her image. I don't begrudger this at all. The ceremony went fine, but afterwards while my in-laws were congratulating me, my father

and law commented that I looked beautiful, and in the next breath mentioned that Tiffany did too. His wife caught his eye and shook his head, but I ignored it. When Tiffany came over to say congratulations, she looked stunning. Her dress was beautiful and fitted her perfectly. Her hair and makeup looked like they'd been done professionally, and she was wearing a pair of obviously designer shoes. Her outfit was totally appropriate for the event, but I was still weirdly upset

by how she looked and immediately felt self-conscious next to her. Even Matt told her that she looked great and they rarely talk. For the rest of the night, every single male guest at the wedding asked about Tiffany, who she was, how I know her if she was single, etc. By the time we got to speeches, I was fed up and almost in tears, and even the best man mentioned her in his speech off the cuff. I let it go, went on my honeymoon, and tried to forget the whole thing. We came back about a week ago, and this past weekend we had dinner with my in-laws. Tiffany was visiting, and we

learned that she got engaged. She showed us her comically large ring and said that she was planning to have the wedding next year and that it would be a black tie event. Before I could stop myself, I jokingly said that I was pretty sure that I'd already been to her wedding. I was the one in the white dress. She asked what I meant, and I thought there was no point in lying, so I just admitted that I felt that she upstaged me at my wedding. She laughed and said that you can't upstage a bride. I asked if I could wear white to her wedding then, and she shrugged and said,

If you think it'll help, she then apologized if I felt that her outfit was inappropriate. My in-laws moved the conversation on and we went on with dinner. When we got home, my husband blew up on me, saying that I embarrassed him by being petty and jealous of Tiffany. He says he doesn't even like her, but even he knows that she can't do anything about what she looks like or the clothes she can afford, and that I made myself look bitter and childish and him by association. I admit that it wasn't my best moment, but I thought that he would at least understand how I felt given that he heard everyone's comments that night.

He's demanding that I apologize to Tiffany and his parents, but I don't think that I said anything that heinous. Am I the butthole? Opie, very early in the story, you said that Tiffany, where is it? You said Tiffany's very pretty and you don't begrudge her this at all. I don't believe you. To be honest, I don't believe you at all. It does honestly sound like you have a grudge against Tiffany and you're just jealous. I mean, you are. You're jealous and you're petty.

Your husband's right. And like the thing is, Tiffany didn't actually do anything to embarrass you at the wedding. She just showed up dressed in wedding attire. It's not really her fault that she's pretty and it's not her fault that she looks good in makeup. So I'm giving Tiffany zero out of five but holes and I'm giving you 1.5 out of five but holes. Am I the but hole for still going to my sister's wedding after my husband canceled my plane ticket? I'm a 30 year old wedding after my husband canceled my plane ticket? I'm a 30 year old woman and my husband is 36.

We have three kids, ages 2, 4, and 7. I'm a full time stay at home mom and I take care of my kids while my husband works full time. My sister's wedding was last week. We live hours away, which is an issue for my husband. When he first got the invite, he told me that he wasn't going, that he'll stay for the kids, and he suggested that I do the same. The reasons for this are because the wedding doesn't allow kids, and my husband doesn't want a babysitter because the last babysitter we had robbed us. We went back and forth over this a bit,

but I insisted on going since that's my only sister, and I want to attend what might be a once in aetime event for her. He chuckled at my statement and we stopped talking about it. As the wedding was approaching, he brought it up and told me to miss it and stay with the kids. I suggested that since no babysitters were allowed, I could get my friend to stay with the kids, but he refused. I ignored him, spoke to my friend who agreed to watch the kids and booked a ticket to travel to my sister's town. My husband found out and went on about how he had to work and that the most logical solution

is that I stay home with the kids and let him make his living. I told him that I already took care of the kids and they'll stay with my friends and honestly, I grew impatient. The day of my flight, I dropped the kids off of my friend's place and went to the airport. It was there that I found out that my husband had canceled my plane tickets. I was upset, but still insisted on going, so I went home, got my car, and drove four hours to get to my sister's town. At 5 p.m., my husband called me and was freaking out on me asking me where I was.

I told him that I drove to my sister's town and he blew up on me saying that I wasn't supposed to go. He even said that he canceled my ticket to get me to stay. He demanded I return, but I said that I wasn't until the wedding was over. He called me a horrible neglectful mom, then had his mom scold me and accuse me of abandoning my own kids. When I got home, a huge argument broke out, and my husband kept saying that I was horrible to leave the kids and to ignore them like that, and just go do what I wanted to do myself. He's giving me the silent treatment, and I can no longer take it.

I felt guilty, and I didn't enjoy the wedding at all. Was I wrong for still going? Yo OP, holy sh**. OP, what is going on with your husband? Down in the comments, Weiwei Jing says it best. Financial abuse? Yup. Isolating you from your loved ones?

Yup. Controlling behavior? Yup. And also, let's not forget the baseline disrespect of refusing to take off what, probably two or three days off work to watch your own kids. No, that's woman's work, so I can't do it as the father. My wife has to watch the kids for me. That way I can be a big strong man and go make money.

Look, it's great that this guy is providing for the family and all. I'm not trying to bash him for that. But like for real, this guy has so little respect for his wife's time that he can't take two whole days off of work to watch the kids. And then calling you neglectful, but... Ha! Your kids weren't neglected! Your friend was watching them.

And then when all is said and done, he tells his mommy on you. Opie, your husband is mechotoxic. Opie, you get zero out of five buttholes. You going to your only sister's wedding is completely reasonable. Your husband, on the other hand, gets four out of five buttholes. He's exhibiting some really worrying behavior.

Am I the butthole for eating my cupcake outside? I have a 10-year year old daughter who loves frosting. Every week I buy cupcakes for me, my wife and her, and she always eats my frosting. These past few weeks, I decided to eat my cupcakes before going inside. My daughter asked me where my cupcake was, and I told her that I don't like cupcakes anymore, so I only bought two. It worked for a while, but last night when I was enjoying my cupcakes before going inside, she caught me and ran to her mom to tell her how much of a terrible dad I am to steal

her frosting for weeks. She's soaking, and my wife thinks that I'm the butthole and I'm acting childish, and I should just let her have it. But it's easy for her to say when she's never given up her frosting. Am I the butthole? Opie, I think I'll say you are the butthole, but not because you won't share your frosting, but because you've raised a 10-year-old who can't handle the word no. It's your cupcake! It's your frosting. You shouldn't have to be like a cupcake ninja who sneaks around the house eating cupcakes hiding them from your daughter. You should just be able to say,

no sweetie, this is Daddy's cupcake, so Daddy's gonna eat it. This is your cupcake, you can eat this one. So I'll give your daughter zero out of five buttholes, and I'll give you one out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for telling my sister that she overreacted when she screamed at me for entering her and her husband's room? So I'm a 23 year old woman and I'm a full-time college student. Right now, I'm living with my sister Claire and her husband, Thomas, while I get through my current semester. I don't work, so I don't have everything that I need for my daily skin and hair routine, so I borrow stuff from Claire. Claire didn't have an issue in the beginning, but then she started complaining about me randomly walking into her room, but I'd go in there to look for the stuff that I asked for. She gave me a hard time just because I walked in on Thomas' half naked to get her eye shadow,

and then another time when I walked in late at night. She told me that I need to get her permission to enter the room before I take anything, but I figured this would make things more complicated. It's already enough that I have to ask to borrow an item, so last night around 10pm I went upstairs and into her bedroom to grab the hairdryer. I walked in and, whoops, I saw them in an intimate position together in bed. I had no idea they were doing that, especially since Claire told me that Thomas had been feeling sick for the past two days.

She lashed out at me and told me to get out. I quickly grabbed the hairdryer, then walked out and shut the door. Minutes later, she came downstairs in a robe and went off on me saying that she was done with me repeatedly disrespecting and violating her and her husband's privacy. I told her it was cool, no big deal, and that I needed the dryer, but I didn't have time to ask for permission. She got even louder, saying that I had no business barging into her marital space and embarrassing her in her husband like that. I told her that I was sorry, but she really overreacted to this whole thing. This made her even more pissed,

and she went on about how I'm living here rent-free, but I'm not being respectful. I stopped arguing and went to my room. This morning, Thomas left the house early and Claire ignored me during breakfast. She was still upset, saying that I don't get to say whether she overreacted or not, and then my behavior was inappropriate. She even wants me to apologize to her husband for making last night awkward. Man, every once in a while I'll get a post where OP is so obviously clearly wrong that I literally don't understand what would have to go through someone's brain to think, well I'm not the butthole, let me just go online and type out

this post and clearly everyone will agree with me because I did nothing wrong here. This is one of those posts. OP, I literally cannot comprehend how you don't, like, how do you not get this? She said a boundary, you repeatedly ignored the boundary, you walked in on them passionately hugging, and then you didn't immediately turn around. You walked, I'm guessing to the bathroom to grab the hair dryer and then walked out while they were, you know, half naked or whatever. Opie, I'm amazed that your sister hasn't kicked you out yet. Opie, I'm giving you 2.5 out of 5 buttholes. Everyone else gets 0 out of 5 buttholes.

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