rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole For Calling My White Girlfriend "Mayo Momma?"

Episode Date: November 22, 2020

r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP is a black man in a relationship with a white woman. As a joke, he calls his girlfriend his "mayo momma" because she's white. He accidentally calls her this in front of her parents, and they completely flip out on him. They say that he's being racist and insensitive, but he thinks that it's perfectly fine because his girlfriend thinks its funny. What do you think? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Shut up, Amazon, for last minute it's great deals for everyone on your list Gifts for moment, gifts for dad, even for your sister and your brother chat Ah shoot, we didn't realize you were supposed to get a gift for a dog, what a guy We almost forgot about it, then to start to curve, we didn't expect to get a gift from her Or our cousin might forget his name, he got something nice, better reciprocate Flasmin' it deals on gifts of people you forgot Get past the pre-shipping at Amazon Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best poster McCross Reddit.

Today's subreddit is R-Slash and My The Butthole where OP calls his girlfriend his Mayo Mama. Am I the butthole for telling my brother that he got exactly what he deserved when he pushed his girlfriend away for being a gold digger? My brother is a very hardworking man and at 27 he's now very wealthy and doing well for himself. He's been with his girlfriend for six months now and throughout this time we've gotten close because we both like hair, makeup, and shopping.

I never knew there was anything wrong with the relationship except when she texted me last week saying that she would love to hang out, but she thinks that it would be inappropriate because she and my brother broke up. I asked her why, and she said she was sick and tired of auditioning to prove that she was with him for the right reasons. She went on to say that my brother is paranoid that she's after his money so he would test her, like leaving out his bank statements on their bed and getting upset when she picked it up. Or going out to eat at high-end restaurants that he requested and leaving his wallet at home on purpose to make

her pay the bill to prove that she's not going out with them for money, or never buying her gifts and questioning her when she asked why he doesn't. I was shocked, so I had to hear my brother's perspective. We spoke, and he told me everything she said was true and that there was nothing wrong with making sure his girlfriend is with him for the right reasons. He said that he left his bank statements on the bid and was peaking through the door to see if she would be curious. And when he saw her pick up the papers, he knew in his gut that she was using him for money.

So he set up the restaurant idea to see if she would get upset at paying a $500 bill which he was. I asked him if he thinks that her being an elementary school teacher could have contributed to her being upset at a $500 bill at a restaurant that he wanted to go to, and he said no. He said the straw that broke was when she asked him why he hasn't bought her a single gift since they've started dating. When she bought him a gaming console and new rooms for his car, and he knew she was just discreetly asking him to buy an expensive gift. He confronted her and said he thinks she's with him for his money so she said let me do us both a favor and dumped him and blocked him. He's upset about the gold digging

b-word and when I laughed he called me a butthole. He said I would never understand what it's like being a rich man and being used and I get that concern. But I told him that if he thinks that any woman would be okay with his tests and auditions, and he's delusional as hell. If he doesn't want to be used for his money, then he should start dating people as wealthy as him, or leave lower income people alone if he's not going to be genuine in his relationships unless they pass his test. Opie, you get zero out of five buttholes. Your brother's problem has nothing to do with money. Your brother's problem has to do with him being a terrible boyfriend and just an all-around butthole.

Like he left a bank statement on the bed and then gets upset at her when she looks at it. Who isn't going to look at a bank statement on a bed? I mean, typically you can't tell what a document is until you pick it up and read it. So if someone walks into the room and there's a letter on the bid, then the next logical response is to pick it up, look at it and figure out what on earth it's doing on the bid. And then taking her to a restaurant and leaving her with a $500 bill? I don't care if you make $500,000 a year or $50,000 a year. If you did that to me, I'd be pissed at you. And then not buying his girlfriend gifts after his girlfriend

spent hundreds of dollars on her? Yeah, your brother is a major douchebag. I'm giving him three out of five buttholes. He doesn't deserve that girlfriend. If anything, it sounds like he's the gold digger because he's the only one bringing money into the relationship. Am I the butthole for calling my grandma by the wrong name until she gets my name right?

This has been going on since forever, so I decided to do something. I'm a 16 year old boy in half Mexican for my dad's side and my mom's side is Scottish. Not gonna lie, most of my mom's family is high-key racist and it's led to problems sometimes growing up. My grandma and my mom's side never liked my dad and was happy after they divorced when I was seven. My name is Emiliano and my grandma always complained about how hard she tried to change my parents' minds about my name and it's a shame that I got stuck with it.

I'm actually proud of it. My dad told me about the revolutionary I was named after in their history. But literally my entire life, my grandma refuses to say it. She says it's too many syllables, but I've got a cousin named Alexandria and they say the whole name. And she always comes up with her own nicknames. She calls me Leo, or one, she tried to get everyone to call me Elliot as a nickname for a while. Obviously my mom's family was forward, but my dad refused because that's not my name. It's always the same thing when I see them. She'll call me Leo, or whatever. Even when

I correct her, she says it's not a big deal and keeps calling me the wrong name. I told my mom I don't like it, but she always says that I'm not going to change her mind and there's no point in fighting it. So I decided that if she's not going to call me by my actual name, then I'm not going to call my grandma by her right name. It's stupid I know, but it bothers me that she doesn't care and she says all my cousin's name is just fine, no nicknames. Her name is Susan, so I decided to call her Sandy. To be honest, I was scared to say it, but that look on her face was worth it, LMAO. It wasn't surprise Pikachu face, but it was close. She said that's not how I address her and that it's grandma. I told her, now, I'm gonna call you Sandy from now on unless you use my actual name.

It got awkward. My mom got serious and my grandma got super red in the face. She started ranting about me being an effing disrespectful child and this is my dad influencing me again. My mom told me that I need to apologize immediately, but I don't know what gave me the balls to not do it. We ended up leaving the house early and my mom didn't talk to me until we got home. She says that what I did was out of line and that I don't disrespect my elders ever.

She wants me to apologize and I'm grounded until I do. I haven't talked to my dad yet about this since it just happened, but I wanted to ask if I was being the butthole or was it okay in the situation to insult my grandmother? Now OP, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes. There's nothing wrong with expecting other people to show you the basic respect of using your real name. You were just giving your grandma a dose of her own medicine. And down in the comments, JD British has the perfect response.

Why not call her a bella or abuelita, sort of malicious compliance like? Am I the butthole for not telling a vegan mom that the candy she stole from my kids and was eating wasn't vegan? This happened on Halloween in the following day. My neighbors are 38 year old woman, a super vegan with two kids. I'm a 26 year old woman and I also have two kids.

My apartment complex didn't do traditional trick or treating-treating on Halloween. Residents were advised to set out pre-packaged individual candy bags on their patios in front door areas if they wanted to participate. But the traditional knock-on door physically hand-stranged host Candy was not permitted. So, Halloween comes and the kids are all dressed up and each building has a schedule time where the kids go door-to- door. I ended up having to work late, so my neighbor offered to walk my kids around with hers at our building schedule time. About 45 minutes later, my kids came home with a small bucket of candy. Six little goody bags each from individual apartments that participated, and everything was fine. My kids didn't say anything weird had happened.

They were just excited to eat candy once they got home, low. The next day, I took my kids to the park directly across from our apartment complex. My neighbor was there with their kids as well. The kids were playing, and my neighbor took out one of those individual goody-bags with candy in it from her purse and started to loudly rummage in it. She ate several pieces of candy and my daughter eventually noticed, ran up, and asked if she could have a piece of candy, and my neighbor responded. Nope, this is my tax candy. Remember that this was my reward for taking you trick or treating last night. I was a little weirded up by that statement and asked what she meant.

She said that since she's the one who had to take the kids out, she took 5 bags of candy from each of my kids as a tax. Her son then chimes in and said, You only took two bags of candy from us?" She responded with, But I'm your mom. I was doing O'Pia Fabers so they get a higher candy tax. I was thinking about how to respond when I noticed that she was holding a Starburst candy and decided to just smile and nod and go back to watching my kids. I watched her eat the bag of candy and then I said,

Hey, aren't you vegan? You know a lot of those candies are made with animal products, right? I then explained what Gelden was and how a lot of those candies are made with it. She was horrified, Googled it, and then told her kids that they were leaving. She said something about how she was going to be sick and stormed off. Now she's giving me dirty looks every time she sees me, and she won't let her kids play with mine at the park whenever we're both there. My husband thinks that I'm the butthole because I should have either not said anything about the gelatin or said something right away when I noticed.

I don't think it's my job to tell a vegan what isn't isn't vegan though, and she deserved it for stealing candy from little kids. Whenever people come up with examples of pointlessly evil deeds, stealing candy from kids is usually at the top of the list. And that's actually what this lady did. She's literally Disney Super villain levels of evil. And can we talk about the candy tax? Because four bags of candy for a candy tax when they only had 10 bags total, that's a 40% tax rate.

You think this lady is paying 40% taxes on her paycheck? Yeah, give me a break. OP, you get zero out of five buttholes and your neighbor gets three out of five buttholes. These side marios all you can eat? Is all you can munch a soup? Salad. And garlic home, though.

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choose his cake flavor not buying a second cake? My son's 13th birthday is coming up soon, and I promised him years ago that on his 13th birthday, he could pick out whatever flavor cake he wanted, no matter what. The reason for this is one of my sisters, that on his 13th birthday, he could pick out whatever Flavor cake he wanted, no matter what. The reason for this is one of my sisters, a very selfish sister, throws a fit whenever there's not a cake of her Flavor choice available.

Both of my kids adore chocolate and hate vanilla cake, and we're getting tired of having to buy a birthday cake that either our kids won't eat or she won't eat. And having to endure a 26 year old woman throwing a temper tantrum. For the last 12 years, we've provided a second cake. Yes, an entire cake, specifically for her. However, now that our kids are older, they require bigger cakes, and it's just not feasible to buy two cakes. Since our son is 13, I want this birthday to be super special to celebrate him becoming a teenager. So, will I be the butthole for letting my son choose his cake flavor and not buying

a second cake for my sister? And before anyone asks, yes, I've tried cupcakes. Down in the comments, Blueberry Pie asks, are you serious? How very backwards this sounds. The child should have been able to choose the flavor of his own birthday cake every single year. It's his birthday, not your sisters. Let her throw a tantrum and grow the hell up or don't come. Why is everyone catering to her immaturity?

They should be there to celebrate your son's birthday. O.P. is not the butthole, obviously. Then O.P. replies, she's very entitled. She once got mad that the cake wasn't vanilla and threw the entire cake on the ground. I think everyone makes excuses for her to avoid the meltdowns that come from her not getting her way. Wait, OP, this lady threw a child's birthday cake on the ground because it wasn't the flavor that she wanted. That's so like

laughably evil, it sounds like a Disney villain. This is really simple. If someone ever showed up to my kid's birthday party and threw the kid's cake on the ground, then that would be the last birthday party they ever got invited to. The last anything they ever got invited to for that matter. Am I the blood hole for pressing charges? My cousin turned 18 recently, she's in high school. She doesn't have a car, and during her birthday weekend, she thought her parents were going to buy her one. They didn't get her one, and she was pretty upset. I should note that I'm not very close with my cousin, or the rest of my extended family

for that matter. I only heard about this for the grapevine from my dad. Anyway, my cousin texted me on Friday before a birthday asking if she could take my card of the mall and then for an out of town road trip with her friends over the weekend. I told her no. She begs and pleads with me. I tell her no again. My car is for me to drive and for me only.

If she wants her own car then she can save up and buy one. She calls me a B-word and says that I ruined her birthday and that she's embarrassed because her friends think that she got a car for her birthday and she doesn't have one. I don't respond to her and think nothing of it. The weekend comes and I sleep in very late on Saturday waking up at 1 p.m. Don't judge, lol. Even though my car is parked in my driveway and my gate is closed, I come to realize that someone egged and toilet papered my car. With many, many eggs, and five or six rolls of toilet paper. And since the weather was warm outside, the raw egg baked into my car, along with the dried up toilet paper, destroying the paint.

Since I have security cameras around my house, I decided to go back and watch. At around 930 that morning, I see my cousin in a bunch of our stupid friends vandalizing my car. I'm surprised she didn't smash the windows and poke holes in the tires too. I obviously press charges, and my cousin isn't legal trouble. Her and her parents are pissed off at me for pressing charges, and her parents are telling me that she's just a kid. And that she's been through a lot of emotional stress doing the virtual schooling for this past year, and that I should take that into consideration. And that I should be ashamed of myself repressing legal charges against my baby cousin. That I'm almost 30, and don't I remember what it was like at that age? I do remember, and I wasn't stupid enough to egg someone's car. And can't she

work something out with me like doing chores around my house for money if I drop the charges? That she's young, that she doesn't need a felony on her record, etc. and that it was just a prank. Right after I pressed charges, my cousin was calling and texting me over and over saying that this could have been avoided how to let her take my car. Am I the butthole in this situation? I need to add that my cousin already has a felony on her record, a DUI. She's not remorseful or anything.

Also, my aunt and uncle won't pay me for the damages. They want me to drop the charges and pay for everything myself like nothing happened. They are cheap. So if another kid from the neighborhood destroyed their property, I'm sure they just brush it off. After all, kids will be kids, right? No harm, no foul. So what if they smashed your windows or destroyed your garden or spray painted your car or whatever?

It's all just harmless kid fun, right? Of course not. They'd be up in arm just like anyone else would. OP, you're not the butthole here. Your cousin's family is super entitled. I mean, if they'd offered to pay for the damages, then I could maybe see you being slightly buttholes here because you're being a little bit harsh to your own family, but they're not paying for the damages so they can go screw themselves. OP, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes, your cousin's family gets 4 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for calling my white girlfriend a meyo mama? Okay, so this sounds ridiculous but bear with me. I'm a 28-year-old African

American man and my girlfriend will call her Susie as a 26-year-old white woman, and obviously, so was her family. They're pretty chill and we've never had our problem and we live in a fairly liberal part of the country. Now, a while back we were fooling around making fun of each other and I called her a meyo mama. It was kind of an instant regret thing, but she found it hilarious and that was my pet name for her. Anyway, we had to drop some stuff off for her mom the other day because she doesn't like leaving the house too much at the moment because of you know what. So we were all chatting for a little while and the pet name slipped out. I never said it in front of anyone before because I understand people might find it

odd and boy her parents did not like it. They started saying I was being racist and clearly have double standards. Susie tried to tell them to be quiet and said that she liked the nickname and if she doesn't feel offended by it, then they shouldn't speak for her. But they persisted and her dad came out with one of the funniest things I've ever heard someone say to me in the most sincere way possible. How would you feel if she called you her chocolate daddy? I started laughing, and Susie tried to hide her face, but she looked like she was about to cry from hysterics. I told him I wouldn't really care if it wasn't coming from a place of malice, and we decided

to GTFO as soon as possible. Anyways, now Susie's been receiving messages from her parents saying that they still think it's racist and disrespectful. And I should apologize and drop the nickname, but she's sticking to her guns that it's no one's business. And she's even started calling me chocolate daddy, and honestly, I can't stop myself from laughing whenever she says it. But still, I feel a bit bad for causing an argument with her parents and causing her to be getting hounded by angry messages. Am I the butthole? That was our slash of my the butthole, and if you like this content then check out my Patreon where I published videos that were banned from YouTube. Also, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes

every single day.