rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole for Choosing My Horse over My Boyfriend?

Episode Date: March 5, 2022

r/AmITheA**hole We've all heard the story before: "It's either me or the pet!" Normally, you expect that argument to be about a cat or a dog, but this time it's about a horse. OP is a horse girl who loves spending time at the farm with her horse. Her new boyfriend absolute hates her horse and demands that she sells it. He even refuses to allow her to spend time at the farm, insisting that she should want to spend every waking second with him instead. Who's the butthole here? Get $10 in free Bitcoin at Coinbase.com/rslash Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to R-slash. Am I the butthole where OP names her dog an offensive name? Okay, so before this next post starts, I've got to ask you guys a question, because this is going to become very important later. If I were to ask you, what do you think about banning the Y word from the English language? What would you think that word is? Are you like me and you have literally no idea? Well then, if so, you should find this upcoming post amusing. Am I the butthole for giving my dog an offensive name and then refusing to change it? I have several dogs, one of which is an American Akita, his name is Yankee.

I thought it was funny and he seems to like his name. My sister was in the States the past two years, and recently flew home with her boyfriend in tow. It was the first time that we met him. I guess she never mentioned me or my dogs, but he was pretty surprised when I told him my dog's name. I didn't think much of it. Most of my pets have peculiar names, so I assumed that it was just an overall reaction.

They left and my partner and I had dinner. Partway through our food, my sister called and asked if I would consider changing my dog's name. I kind of thought that she was kidding, but she reiterated that she was serious. The name Yankee had upset her boyfriend, quite badly, and he found it offensive. I basically told her to f off and tell him to grow up before going back to my food. The following day, they literally going back to my food. The following day, they literally show up at my door. I was kind of taken aback.

Apparently, they came to tell me why the name Yankee was so awful. During this discussion, he told me that it was essentially a slur used against Americans. And he asked me if I would ever name a dog the Inward. I just kind of left, and told him he was off as nut. It's not that serious. You can't equate the word Yankee to something like the Inward. I told him I was not going to change my dog's name. He knows his name, and it would be a ton of work to change it. The dog works in personal protection, so it could even damage his work. Thankfully, they left, but he still seemed pretty upset. Thinking back now, I'm pretty sure there's a company with Yankee in the name.

I wonder how many letters of complaint he sent to that company. Anyway, I did message my American friends just to make sure that I wasn't being a prick. They all agree that he was being stupid, but I know that the US is huge and it might be more of a regional thing, so I'm still not sure. I'm starting to feel like kind of a butthole for not taking him seriously when it may have been a genuine issue for him. So I come to Reddit, two birds, one stone. I know a large number of Americans frequent the subreddits. Am I the butthole and is this an issue in the states that I should apologize for?

Opie, not only have I never in my entire life heard someone use the word Yankee in a derogatory way, but I've also never heard someone even discuss the word Yankee being used in a derogatory way. This story is the first time in my entire life I've ever heard of anyone like talking about this. Well, no, I guess technically that's not true. I do remember learning in school that the South came up with a term Yankee to like make fun of Northern Americans. When did that stop being like a slur against Northerners? Like the 1800s? In America, being called a Yankee is roughly synonymous with just being from the Northeast of America. And yeah, there's a lot of companies that are called Yankee.

Yankee Candle, the New York Yankees, have they ever, has there ever been Yankee's protest over name? Has this ever happened? Okay, there is one article that was published in 2013. The headline is, very sensitive man, thanks that, very sensitive man, thanks that Yankees is quote, the most offensive name in American sports. Really? That's the most offensive name in American sports. Not the redskins. The team that literally had to change its name because

it was so offensive. Who is this dude? Jason Fornwaltt wrote a letter to the Washington Post, calling for people to stop using the Y word? He says the term Yankee was created by the British to mock the American colonists during the Revolutionary War. It was an insult and the history of its use unlike Redskins is not in dispute. Did the British create the word? I thought the South created the word. Okay, yes, I've gone to Wikipedia and apparently Britz did come up with the word Yankee and it wasn't Southern Americans from the South of the United States.

Look, I'm getting a sidetracked here. The point is, if you came up to someone like man on the street interview and you said, how do you feel about banning the Y word? Most Americans, I'd say probably 9 out of 10 Americans would literally have no clue what you're talking about. The Y word? So no OP, your sister's boyfriend is being a sensitive little wimp. Yankee is not a slur. It's just a word that means New Englander, Northerner. That's pretty much it. I guess I've heard like people in the UK use it in kind of like a playful ribbing thing? Oh, you're a Yanke, aren't you? Or something like that, but it's not a slur.

Opie, you get zero out of five buttholes. Your dog Yankee also gets zero out of five buttholes. Your sister's boyfriend, I don't know if I want to give him a butthole score because if he does find the word offensive, I think the way he handled it is kind of like acceptable and normal, like he just asked you politely, then he tried to explain his case, and then when you disagreed, he just left, which is not really butthole behavior, he's just dumb, he's just wrong and dumb. So I'm gonna give him zero out of five buttholes, but I'll give him 85 out of a hundred IQ. Am I the butthole for insisting that my boyfriend pay me for breaking my $3,500 model ship? I'm a 33 year old woman and when my dad passed away

he left me one of his last and favorite model ships. I've had it on display in my living room, but for some reason, I never actually mentioned it to my boyfriend of six months who's 37 years old. Maybe because we don't live together and he doesn't visit often. The other day, he and his friends came over to my place to celebrate his birthday. They got drunk and started throwing the sofa pillows at each other. I told them to stop and then went to the kitchen to clean up. I then heard a loud noise. I walked out the kitchen and saw my father's model ship in my boyfriend's hands. I rushed to go get it, but then he passed it on to his friend and then his friend passed

it on to the other friends. I started running around trying to catch it while yelling at them to stop and then my boyfriend grabbed it again. I was so angry. I told him to hand it over, but he said I had to kiss him first. I yelled at him and he tried to throw it to his friend who tried to catch it, but he missed so it hit the wall and broke. I lost it.

I kicked all of his friends out, then had a fight with my boyfriend telling him that was a sentimental item from my dad. And I demanded that he pay me $3,500 because that's how much the model costs. He left, then called me in the morning asking if I was serious about wanting him to pay $3,500 and I said that I was dead serious. He started making excuses saying that he was drunk, and also how important it was for me, both monetarily and sentimentally, so that's on me. We had another fight, and then I hung up on him telling him that I'm expecting $3,500, and that I was not afraid

to take the legal rat if I had to. He kept texting me, asking me to let it go, and saying that it was cruel of me to threaten him with the law. He and his friends apologized, thinking this would be it, but I insisted that he pay me. I get that I might have gotten worked up over a stupid item and treated my boyfriend badly, but to me it seemed reckless on his part. Am I the butthole? Okay, so first of all, a bunch of 37-year-old men getting drunk, throwing pillows at each other, and then playing keep away with someone else's item, like an adult's item, an adult's possession. That's just stupid. This is not the behavior of a 37-year-old. This is the behavior of a 7-year-old. Opie, in my opinion, this seems pretty straightforward. Either he ponies up the $3,500 and grows up, or you make him walk the plank.

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My older brother is a bit of a bum. It's mean to say, but it's true. He can never hang on to a job for longer than a couple of years max. When he inevitably loses whatever job he had and starts mooching off family and friends until he can find another job months later. This entails him freeloading at their place, eating their food, using their stuff, etc. He's lost friends because of how long he bummed off them, and I don't blame them for cutting him off. Well, the last time he lost his job, he went to stay at our parents. But they didn't have room for him because they were letting our other brothers' families

stay with them after he and his wife lost both their jobs out of nowhere within the same month. Our oldest brother and his family just couldn't afford another home. So my lazy older brother was out of luck. After that, my parents, aunt and uncle all started calling me asking if I would take him in just long enough for him to get back on his feet. I stupidly let myself feel bad for him and said okay. But I only gave him a few months to get another job or he was out on the street.

They all agreed, so of course he came to stay with me. And it's been a nightmare. He's a slob! He never washes dishes, never washes clothes, and eats pretty much whatever he wants. I guess that since I'm his little sister, he figured that he could ignore me when I told him to get his act together. Well, after six months, I told him that he had to go. I gave him a couple of weeks to find somewhere else to live. Well, it seems that my brother called our parents and cried about me kicking him out, and they told him that he knew that he couldn't stay forever, but they of course called my aunts and uncle and told them all about it.

Then my busy buddy Aunt called me and scolded me for being cruel to my brother and abandoning family when they need help. I let her talk and I finally said that she was right, helping family is important and I'm glad that she showed me that. She seemed glad that I understood the right thing to do before hanging up. So I followed her advice, packed my brother up and drove him to her house. I couldn't handle him running up my bills anymore, but my aunt made a good point. Family should help each other out.

So I dropped him off there and left. I wasn't even halfway home before I was getting multiple calls from my parents and aunt. My parents were demanding to know why her aunt was blowing up their phones and my aunt was leaving voicemail shouting at me to come back and get my brother. I explained to my parents and they said that it was a good, and my aunt was leaving voicemail shouting at me to come back and get my brother.

I explained to my parents and they said that it was a good idea since my aunt sounded like she wanted to help. But my aunt called me a butthole and said that she didn't want my brother there. And when I told her that family helps each other out, she called me a grunt. Last time I checked, my brother is still living with her. Am I the butthole? You know, actually OP, that exact line is something I've said in many, many R-slash-am-I the butthole stories. If they care so much about taking care of family, then they can watch after them.

It seems like such an obvious easy compromise. But you OP, you actually did it. So no, you don't get any buttholes here. This is almost like our slash malicious compliance. She says family should help out family, so okay, she can help out her family. O.P. you get zero out of five buttholes. Your brother gets three out of five buttholes and your aunt gets two out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for bringing up my brother's four kids to his fiance and potentially ruining an engagement?

Okay, so I'm a 22 year old woman and I have an older brother, Jamie, who's 28. We've been roommates since I was about 17. And this time, I've seen a lot of girls come and go. Even when he was in a relationship with different girls. I'm not a huge fan of his actions or how he treats women in general, but it's his life and he's free to mess it up as much as he wants, so I turn a blind eye to it. I'm not a huge fan of his actions or how he treats women in general, but it's his life and he's free to mess it up as much as he wants, so I turn a blind eye to it. He has four kids.

His oldest daughter is 10 and she's the only one that he actually pays any child support on, but even then, he rarely sees her. The other two are four-year-old twin boys that he has with one of my close friends. She never took him to court, so I do my best to provide for them if she needs help. His other son, I don't really know much about. I think he's like eight? Jamie doesn't want kids, and he doesn't see them but maybe a handful of times around the year, and he doesn't see his eight-year-old son at all. He calls the kids he has, accidents, and he said before that he wishes he hadn't had

them because he gets irritated when their mother's call them. So essentially, 3 years ago, Jamie met a girl named Natalie and they immediately hit it off. She moved into our apartment, and I like her well enough. With Jamie's habits, I didn't expect her to last very long. But she surprised us both. Since I planned on moving out in a few months, she'd been talking about renovating my room and all sorts of stuff they could do with the space.

She even jokingly said, maybe you could be a nursery. I thought it was a joke and I brushed it off. Well a couple of weeks ago, while I was at a dinner with my friends, Jamie had decorated the apartment and proposed to Natalie. I congratulated them, and I didn't have any problems with this until a few nights ago when we were all drinking and talking. Natalie was gushing about her plans for the wedding and her bridesmaids and her new

ring, but here's where things went wrong. She mentioned how she wanted kids as soon as she could, and how she could see my brother being the best dad. I started laughing. Basically what I said was, he hasn't been the best dad to the four kids he has now. Natalie asked what I meant, and my brother started to freak out. I realized that Natalie didn't know about the four kids, and I explained how he wasn't raising his kids, and how he didn't even want to see them, and didn't want about the four kids, and I explained how he wasn't raising his kids,

and how he didn't even want to see them, and didn't want kids at all. Apparently, Jamie never told her about any of this. My brother was drunk and started yelling, so I called a friend and left. I stayed away for a day or two, and he blew up my phone. I guess that he and Natalie are fighting horribly and he blames me for it. I ruined his engagement, so am I the butthole for telling Natalie when it should have been his choice to tell her about the kids? Our parents agree with him and they haven't been talking to me. Honestly, I feel like I warned her before things got too serious, even if it wasn't deliberate.

He should have told her about them before, so am I the butthole here? Okay OP, so whether you should or shouldn't have told her is kind of like up for debate, some people would say no it's not your business. Other people would say yes she had a right to know. But regardless the fallout is 100% not your burden to bear. This guy literally lied, kept his secret from her for 3 years. This is huge, important information, and what? He planned to just keep her in the dark for the rest of her life? That is not the behavior of a man, that is not the behavior of a husband, that's the behavior of a loser.

Down in the comments, I have to read this post from Fickle Willow. I find it funny how he claims that it's his choice to tell her if he has children, but he sees nothing wrong with taking away Natalie's choice of deciding whether or not she wants to be in a relationship with a man who is chosen not to take care of his four children. Why does he get to have a choice, but she doesn't get the choice to make an informed decision? Yeah, I agree 100%. Regardless of whether or not it was your business, he was a completely douchebag here. I'm giving him 4 out of 5 buttholes, one for each child he's neglecting. UOP get 0 out of 5 buttholes. That was our slash of my the butthole, and if you like this

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