rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole for Getting My Kid's Teacher Fired?

Episode Date: November 11, 2021

r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP has a young daughter who is diabetic, so she needs to eat snacks at regular intervals to keep her blood sugar levels up. One of her teacher banned snacks in the class room, despite the fact that this violates federal law. OP warned the teacher about the snack policy, but when the teacher refused to comply OP has to escalate by reporting her to the principal. The teacher got fired as a result, leaving OP to wonder if she took it too far. Is OP the butthole here? Get 10% off your first month at Betterhelp.com/rslash Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to R-slash, a podcast where I read the best post from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-slash Am I the Butthole, where OP gets her teacher fired. Am I the Butthole forgetting a teacher fired when she wouldn't let my daughter eat in class? I'm a 47 year old woman, and my 13 year old daughter is a type 1 diabetic, and sometimes hypochlycemic. Alright, hold on OP. When I read that post, when I read the title I was thinking, geez O.P, that's a little bit extreme, but like once in and sin, I already know that you're not the butthole. If a diabetic doesn't eat when they're supposed to, don't they go into a coma? Am I right about that?

What happens if a diabetic doesn't eat? If you don't eat, your blood sugar levels are lower and medication may drop them even more, which can lead to hypoglycemia. Hypoglycemia can cause you to feel shaky, pass out, or even go into a coma. Yes, okay. I think we can all agree that 13-year-old girls don't need to fall into a coma in the middle of class, but hey, we'll read the rest of the post anyways just to see what happens, but OP, I'm already on your side. Once in its in, I already know that you're not the butthole. Due to this, we set up a 504 that says that she can eat a snack in class whenever needed, along with other accommodations.

For those who don't know, a 504 plan is a formal plan that schools develop to give kids with disabilities the support they need. Anyways, at one point, one of her teachers who is apparently a new teacher denied my daughter a snack while she was hypoglycemic. My daughter nearly passed out, but in her next class, the teacher had enough common sense to let her eat a snack before passing out at school. When my daughter told me about this, I immediately called the teacher. When the teacher called back, I lectured her and told her that she has to let my daughter eat a snack when needed.

She said that snacks aren't allowed in class, but I told her that due to my daughter's 504, she is legally required to give my daughter an exception to that rule. And I recommended that she give the 504 plan another read. Before hanging up, I told her that if she does this again, I will contact the principal and let him know. I recorded this call on she does this again, I will contact the principal and let him know. I recorded this call on my husband's phone, by the way. A month goes by, and the same thing happens again. I requested a meeting with the principal, and my husband played back the call between me

and the teacher. I told the principal the teacher has done this twice, and he needs to have a talk with her. As it turns out, he actually fired her for violating the Americans with Disabilities Act. How do I know? I ran into her at Publix. She told me that it's my fault that I got her fired over some stupid snacks, and I need to stop raising an entitled brat.

Instead of arguing back, I just walked away. Was I really the butthole? Did I actually go too far? Okay, so in a moment, we can talk about just how much of a butthole this teacher is. But before I get into that, down in the comments, Ford beyond points out, not the butthole. A 504 is a legally binding agreement that the school must follow. The teacher was actually probably fired because she didn't follow the 504, and the school could get into a lot of trouble for that.

Yeah, so turns out violating federal law is a really, really big deal. And this is a public school, which I'm just going to guess that it is because most schools are public. Then a publicly funded school absolutely must follow federal guidelines. Period. And then like putting aside the fact that the school is legally required to follow the 504, there's the ethical consideration. Like, okay, so a teacher's job is to teach kids stuff. Okay, fine. But really, number one on the list of teacher responsibilities

is keep the kids safe. Like, I don't care what your job responsibility is. If you have a minor under your care, then rule number one has to always be keep the kids safe. Then you can worry about teaching the kid or whatever. But instead of upholding her ethical and professional responsibility, she risked your daughter passing out into a coma because because what she didn't want to have a snack in the class like what's the big deal? Oh, P that teacher 100% should have been fired.

Because if she refuses to accommodate disabled children, then she has no business working as a teacher. Point blank. Opie, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving the teacher 5 out of 5 buttholes. She literally endangered the life of a child twice. Am I the butthole for kicking my pregnant sister and her husband out of the house eight months earlier than we'd planned?

I'm a 40-year-old female. My sister Sophie, who's 26, and her husband Ben, who's 28, have been trying to have a kid recently, and about three months ago, my sister confirmed to the family that she was pregnant. I also have two kids. My son, Max, who's 17, and my daughter Amelia, who's 11. Max is gay, which I have to point out because it's pertinent to the incident, and he's currently dating another boy named Charlie. If I'm being honest, I don't completely understand everything about his sexuality,

but I support him unconditionally, and I try my best to keep an open mind and listen to his problems. I can tell that he's happy with Charlie, and they often hang out at the house together watching movies or playing games. As long tell that he's happy with Charlie, and they often hang out at the house together watching movies or playing games. As long as they're being safe and responsible, I frankly don't mind what they do, and really, I've gotten to know Charlie pretty well with how often he's over here.

I don't think that he's out to his parents yet, so the boys will usually come here after school. Okay, now onto the problem. So my sister and her husband recently got evicted from their apartment, and they didn't have a place to stay. My sister and I have never been close, so I suggested she try our parents first, but she was adamant that you stay at my house since we have a guest room, and that if they stayed

at our parents, they would have to sleep on the couch. I gave in of course, because I would feel terrible if I didn't, and we agreed that she and her husband could live with us for a year to find a house and get their life together. About two months in, and I'm honestly surprised that she didn't find out earlier since they were not being subtle about it, but Sophie saw Charlie and Max Kiss and immediately gave me this disapproving glare. She had never acted overtly homophobic to anyone, so I was surprised when she

went full-on freakouts. She said something along the lines of, why are you letting them do that? That is a normal! And she went on that stereotypical rant, a poison for girls, a boy shouldn't be together, blah, blah, blah. And basically just being super hateful and mean. My son really liked Sophie, and I could tell that what she was saying really hurt him. Here's where I might be the butthole. I got pissed, and I told her she had the rest of the day to pack her stuff and get out of my house. They left to stay with Sophie's friend, but now I'm getting phone calls and text telling me that I'm heartless, that she's pregnant, how could I, etc. Should I have just let her stay? I honestly don't know what to do, but Max looks absolutely heartbroken right now.

I don't think that he was expecting her to act like that. Am I the butthole? OP, you're a parent, you're a parent to two children. Yeah, it's commendable that you're trying to maintain a relationship with your sister that you're not super close to, but as a parent, your number one responsibility is making sure that your kids are safe. Your son, Max, is still a minor. He lives with you and he's under your care. If you bring someone into your house to live with you, and that person starts trashing

on your son, criticizing his lifestyle and calling him disgusting, then that person needs to leave immediately. You can't accommodate your homophobic sister at the expense of your gay son. So no OP, you're completely justified. And what's more, it's not like you were literally throwing her out into the street because she had other options. She moved into her friends place, and also she could just go stay at your mom's place. It's like really, what did this woman expect?

That she was going to move into someone else's house, rent free, criticize their children and they're just like, what? Get away with it, I guess? I will say though, and I'm not going to give you a butthole score at all for this, but I think it probably would have been better if you had given more than a 24 hour notice because that is not a lot of time to pack up your stuff and leave. I think if I were in your shoes OP, what I would have done was given them a one week notice and been very clear and said, listen, if you criticize my child one more time, then you are

instantly out of the house. The second you criticize them again, you're gone. A 24 hour notice is really short to find new housing. But that being said, you really do have to put your kids first, so I don't blame me for making that decision. OP, I'm giving you zero out of five buttolls. I'm giving your sister three out of five buttolls. Man, you know, actually thinking about it, would I really give someone who criticized

my kid a week's notice? I'm not sure if I would. I know that I probably should. Like, it would be the morally superior thing to do. But would I do that? I'm actually not so sure. Now that I think about it, I'd probably just kick them out to be honest with you. I'd be mad.

I'd be angry. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I'm on your side, Opie. I'm on your side. Today's podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp. My podcast platform has this neat little graph that shows me my listener demographics, so I can see that most of my viewers are male. That's why I'm thrilled that BetterHelp is sponsoring today's episode,

because mental health among men is honestly a real problem. This statistic is crazy to me. Men make up 38% of talking therapy referrals, yet 78% of suicides are males. That means that the people who need the help the most are getting the least amount of help. Also 6 million men per year suffer from depression, and most of these cases are undiagnosed. That's why I recommend BetterHelp. That's BetterHELP.

BetterHelp will match you to a licensed professional therapist who can help you address your mental health needs. Better help is not a crisis line or self-help. It's professional therapy done securely online. I've got a special offer for our slash listeners. Get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com slash r slash. That's the symbol slash, then the word r slash. Am I the butthole for telling my neighbor that her husband isn't the catchy thing she is? I'm a 28 year old woman, and I recently attended a neighborhood barbecue where this mommy influencer started asking me about my love life in front of the other neighbors. Now this woman is 35 and she's a decade younger than her husband.

When I told her that I wasn't interested in getting married or into a committed relationship, she made comments saying that she was worried I would end up as some bitter old cat lady. She insinuated that me being easy is what's keeping me from finding a life partner, and that if I saw a therapist and sorted out my issues, I would also end up with a catch like her husband. I got really angry and pretty much humiliated her and her husband and friend of the other neighbors saying that her husband isn't that much of a catch because he pretty much cheated on his first wife and abandoned his kids from his first marriage and that their picture perfect Instagram family isn't going to fool me into idealizing them.

I said that ending up with a guy like her husband was my worst nightmare and that her choice in men is unfortunate. She left the barbecue crying and now wants me to apologize to her. Am I the butthole? So I think some people listening to this story might be inclined to say that everyone sucks here, but I disagree. Based on what I'm reading on this story, OP was pretty much mining her own business when this other woman sticks her nose in her business and then judges her for her life choices.

She basically called OP a slut and implied that she would end up lonely and miserable, but maybe that's what OP wants. And then, after OP was criticized for no reason, she tries to give that same energy back to this influencer, and suddenly she's breaking down in tears. Nah, I'm not buying it. OP, the only thing you did was match this girl's energy and send it back to her, and she couldn't handle it. OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes, and I'm giving her 1.5 out of 5 buttholes.

Am I the butthole for locking myself in my newborn in the guest bedroom so that I could finally spend some time with her away from my wife? Hello Reddit, my daughter is 2 weeks old. I've barely held her since she was born. My wife constantly has her. When I do get to hold her, my wife just starts crying hysterically until I give her back. I asked her why, and she said that she was anxious that something would happen to our daughter, and that's why she felt the need to hold her so close. No matter how much I tried to reassure her, she just wouldn't let up. I practically begged her to just let me hold her so that my wife could shower, eat, and

care for herself, but nothing worked. I felt like I was losing precious bonding time with my daughter, so I did what I thought I had to do. My wife fell asleep on the sofa with our child. I took my daughter, went to the guest bedroom, and locked the door. My wife woke up shortly after, very upset of course that our daughter wasn't with her. She soon realized that I was in the guest room and begged me to open the door. She was crying, kicking, and screaming.

I didn't open the door, though, and I spent a good couple of hours with our daughter in there. Apparently, my wife called her mom because I got a call from my mother-in-law cussing me out, saying how I shouldn't be taking a newborn from her postpartum mother and other things like that. My wife has been furious with me and won't speak to me, and I'm just so frustrated because I really just want to spend quality time with my child, but maybe that wasn't the way to do it. Am I the butthole? Oh, P. oh my god. So, I can't really say what's wrong with your wife. I'm not a doctor, I'm not a psychologist. It sounds like there's some really major,

like serious medical issues going on. Maybe it's anxiety, postpartum depression, maybe her meds are off, I don't know, but her behavior is really bizarre. I can definitely sympathize with you, OP, because if I were in your shoes I would definitely want to spend time with my daughter too, but like, can you not see the warning flags in front of you? Like, something's wrong here. Your wife needs help, she needs medical attention,

and the way that you respond to that very obvious red flag is to take the baby from her without letting her know, sneaking off into a room, and then locking the door while she weeps and pounds on the door for literally hours and you just ignore her? Like, whoa, OP, whoa. I'm not gonna give your wife a butthole score. I think it's not applicable out of five buttholes because I think she's having some kind of like

genuine medical problem, but as for you OP, yeah, I'm giving you four out of five buttles. You should be able to hold and play with your daughter. Of course, you should be able to. But the way that you got that at the expense of your wife's mental health is really alarming. And what's more than that? How have you not taken your wife to see a medical professional by now? OP, please seek professional help. Also, one thing I want to point out because I'm a new father, some kind of aware of these things is he said that his wife fell asleep with a daughter on the sofa. And it's not clear if he meant that she was actually holding the baby.

I'm guessing that she was because she flips out whenever she's not holding the baby. And falling asleep with your baby in your arms is extremely dangerous. Because obviously if you're asleep then you lose like your grip on things and like it'll just fall down. So if you fall asleep with your baby in your arms, your baby will literally just roll off your arms and land on the floor. And that's how a baby can get seriously injured. So if your wife is doing this, if she's so exhausted and so attached to the baby that she literally won't put the baby down where the baby needs to sleep and instead she falls asleep with the baby in her arms, this is just, this is red flag city OP. This is red flag city. Am I the butthole for not wanting my disabled sister at my wedding?

The title sounds awful, but please read all the way to the end. I'm a 22-year-old woman and my sister, Anna, who's 21, is special needs. She has severe autism, and while she is verbal, most of her communication is physical like sign language due to her social discomfort. She does speak around family, though, and she has pretty bad cognitive skills. She can't comprehend boundaries and she lives with our parents who can best watch her. I'm getting married in three months. We planned a simple wedding and reception at my fiance, Michael's parents' farm. Since it's all gonna be DIY and we aren't planning anything too expensive, we can do

things pretty quickly since flowers, food, and decor will be provided by his family. I sent out invites last week and I asked that Anna not come. I told my parents that I understood that would mean that they may not show up, but this was just a heads up. So why no Anna? My sister Anna has an issue with touching Michael and trying to kiss him. At times when we were at my parents house, Anna would try to grab Michael's hand, try to lean into Kism, or would have a really bad shutdown if she wasn't allowed to be directly next to Michael. We've tried speaking to her, but there's only so much you can do when she doesn't fully understand.

I told my parents that I just want one day for Michael to be my partner and not Anna's comfort person. They called me selfish and asked how I expected them to agree to something like this. They told me Anna's disabled and may expected them to agree to something like this. They told me Anna's disabled and may never experience a wedding of her own. And while I have Michael for probably the rest of our lives, she'll have no one. And that Michael and I should be a little more understanding of the reality of her life. I feel like a total butthole. And what they're saying has really gotten to me.

And I'm starting to question my decision. Am I the butthole? And then Opie posted an update. My parents called me letting me know that they won't be coming and that it's best that I don't bring Michael around anymore because I've chosen some man over my sister. They told me that Anna wanting to kiss Michael and hug him is normal for a woman her age and that she doesn't understand what her feelings mean. I suggested they try to redirect her during the wedding, but they said Michael is gonna be family to her, and he needs to get over it. I suggested they watch a live stream of the wedding, and they said that's not fair, and they deserve to see things in person. I even offered to pay for someone with

proper credentials to watch her for that day while my parents attend my wedding. My parents asked me what I would do when they died, and they asked if I would just ponder off at every opportunity. I dropped the unfortunate truth bomb that I don't want to put any more of my life aside for Anna anymore. I did that up until I turned 18. I said that Anna is not my responsibility, and I won't be her keeper. I assured them that I would pay for her care, but if she's

okay doing this to Michael, then I worry if I ever do choose to have kids, what she'll do to them. They said that I was sick for suggesting she would do anything to my future kids and hung up on me. They sent a lengthy text telling me not to contact them until I could do the right thing, so that's where we are right now. Opie, I think that you're pretty safely not the butthole here. I think of all days, it's perfectly reasonable to expect that no one else tried

to kiss and hug your husband on your wedding day. And like, I get that your parents are trying to be considerate of your sister, but what about Michael? This guy said boundaries and those boundaries aren't being respected. Doesn't he have a right to not be sexually harassed every single day, especially on his wedding day?

Like, it's not just OP's wedding day, it's also Michael's wedding day too. He has just as much of a right as OP does to feel safe and comfortable at his own wedding. Honestly, I feel like your parents are being hypocritical and really selfish here OP. They just keep excusing Anna's behavior instead of trying to correct it or deal with it in a healthy way, and that just doesn't seem like the right course of action. If a 21-year-old male with mental disabilities was trying to hug and kiss one of their daughters, would they think the same way about it because I seriously doubt it? I mean, as far as I'm concerned, sexual assault is sexual assault, even if it's

coming from a disabled person. OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes as I'm concerned, sexual assault is sexual assault, even if it's coming from a disabled person. O.P. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your parents 3 out of 5 buttholes. That was our Sasha Mitha Butthole, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast, because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.