rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole For Making My Young Daughter Live On The Streets?

Episode Date: December 30, 2020

r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP discovers her young daughter being incredibly rude to a homeless man. OP decides to show her daughter some tough love by forcing her to live outside in their yard in a tent for a night. This proves to be a very eye-opening experience, and the daughter does a 180 in how she treats homeless people. However, OP's family members believe that OP crossed the line. So, is OP the butthole here? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

At Salesforce, we're all about asking more of AI. Questions like, where's the data going? Is it secure? Are you sure? Are you sure you're sure? Get answers you can trust from Salesforce at AskMoreVai.com. Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best post from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash and MyTheButhole, where OP forces her daughter to sleep in a tent like a homeless person. Am I the butthole for refusing to meet my sister on Christmas after she called Child Product

of Services? I'm a 37 year old male, and I lost my wife of 10 years, and it was devastating for me and my daughter. It's unfortunate, but life goes on no matter what happens. My family knows how much I struggle as a single dad, and my sister doesn't really get it. She had issues with my late wife in the past, but now she started helping with my daughter. She redecorated my daughter's room without my consent. She didn't sis I let my daughter go spend days

at her house, but my daughter is comfortable at her home. She then started calling my daughter by another name, and I'm still trying to understand her logic behind this. I told her to stop doing those things and be respectful and supportive, and she defended herself by saying that I'm lashing out due to grief. I recently started teaching my daughter to do stuff on her own, like brush her hair, clean her room, wash her cups, and make sandwiches while I take care of bigger stuff. My sister said that what I'm doing is wrong. That I'm giving her more than she can handle.

She's just a kid, and although I told my sister I'm teaching my daughter to be more independent, she said that I'm clearly doing this for my own benefits and avoiding responsibility. I got into a fight with her about this. I told her she has zero say in this, and the next day, a CPS officer came to my house and took a tour around my house. My first thought was, maybe he got the wrong house, until he started reading the report to me, saying that I'm never home and that I make my daughter do things that aren't her responsibility, neglecting her education, by the way she's homeschooled, and that I'm not taking care of basic hygiene and whatnot. I told my daughter my story and I explained that I'm adapting as a single parent and he proceeded to ask my daughter some questions.

It was clearly a false report. However, I was told that I'll have a permanent record with CPS, and I was shaken up by this. I told my family about it, and my other sister told me that my sister was the one who called CPS after we had that big argument. I was so mad that I confronted her. I called her immature and stupid to pull this stunt. She's in her 40s, and that she's no longer my sister. Then I cut contact. It's been months and now

my dad started bringing her up knowing how uncomfortable I was. He said that my sister feels sorry for what she did and wanted to talk things out on Christmas dinner, but I said no. He and the others insisted saying that I should be the bigger person. The family will be incomplete without me and my daughter on Christmas. They said that I refused to be a civil adult to solve the issue that's dividing the family. I yelled and said that my daughter and I don't have to go to dinner after what she did. It doesn't matter if she has issues on her own and didn't mean it and was just concerned. WTF was she so concerned about.

They demanded that I at least let my daughter go be with them and her auntie on Christmas. Look, alright, sometimes family members fight with each other, but calling CPS on a single father? Them's fightin' words. OP, your sister completely crossed the line, and I don't blame you at all for reacting the way you did. It's completely unfair of your family to put all the pressure on you to be the good guy. OP, you get zero out of five buttholes, your sister gets three out of five buttholes and your other family members get two out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for making my daughter sleep in a tent?

I'm a 34-year-old woman and I'm a single mother of two girls, Jasmine who's 16 and Jessica who's 14. Their dad died when I was pregnant with Jess and I had to work hard. We hit rock bottom and I was barely making a paycheck to paycheck, but I managed to get a degree become successful, and we live well.

The point is, I know how effing hearted is to be at the bottom of society, and my daughters know this. Which is why I was livid at my daughter's actions. Yesterday, Jasmine showed me a video of Jessica cussing a homeless man out and telling him, Stop asking me for money, you don't know yourself if you weren't so effing lazy and spending what you earned on substances. When the homeless man complained about the cold, we live in northeast England, Jessica responded. Yeah, people can't for fun, even in December, you can't complain, you're living someone's

holiday. Fury was an understatement for what I felt, as I thought that I'd raise an empathetic daughter. Along with finding the homeless man and making her apologize and help pay for a hotel room for the night for him, she paid him 20 pounds. As well as signing her up to volunteer at a food bank, I decided to take her up on her offer of sleeping outside. I locked her bedroom door so she couldn't go in, put a sign on it that said close for

the holidays, pitched a tent in the garden, and filled it with blankets in the sleeping bag I used when I was camping in Norway on a family holiday as a team. I slept in the room closest to the garden for that night so I was nearby if anything went wrong. She was reluctant to do it, but shows that over the option of not having access to her phone until the Christmas holidays were over. In the morning, she was crying about how horrible it was to wake up on a cold mat and get disrupted sleep due to birds.

After comforting her, I asked her if she would like to do that every day like the homeless man. It struck a chord with her and she was crying over her actions. Meanwhile, when she gave the guy the 20 pounds, she was rolling her eyes and her apology wasn't sincere. This afternoon, I came home from work to find Jessica making a big meal to donate to the homeless people who live on the road near my house. I was proud of how she turned over a new leave, and after taking the food to the people,

my sister came over. Apparently, my nephew and Jessica were talking at school and he asked her about her plans for the afternoon, and she said that she was going to cook for the homeless. My nephew asked what triggered that, and just told him everything which he related to his mom. My sister said that the punishment was too harsh harsh and just the 20 pounds in the food bank would have done the trick and I was acting irrationally due to my past. Now I'm second guessing myself, am I the butthole?

Nah OP, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes, you were just showing your daughter some tough love. I mean yeah it was pretty tough but emphasis on the word love. Clearly the lesson worked and your daughter is becoming a better person because of it. The best adventures are the ones we share. So explore together with the 2023 Defender 130 featuring increased cargo capacity and room for eight adults. With unstoppable off-road capability, excellent on-road dynamics, 21st century connectivity and luxury interiors, you'll be capable of great things. The 2023 Defender 130, Adventure, Share Widenly.

Contact your Land Rover Authorized dealer for details. You're flying to meet with a new supplier to keep your business growing. And with the business platinum card from American Express, you can earn $820 in new value and more, which includes a $200 travel credit toward your flight. Now boarding business class. American Express, don't do business without it. Terms and conditions apply as at amx.ca slash business platinum. In my the buttole for celebrating my anniversary despite what happened in my wedding, my husband

and I had our wedding last year. The venue was beautiful and bordered alike. Unfortunately, during the reception, one of the young children snuck away from their parents and decided to go for a swim, despite not knowing how to swim. This was tragic and devastating, and obviously cut the day short. We haven't really spoken to the parents since then as we weren't close to them aside from seeing them on holidays, which haven't happened this year. We're still Facebook friends though.

When our first anniversary came, I made a post celebrating our anniversary with a few wedding posts. I didn't think anything of it until the comments came flooding in. I woke up to 30 comments and 15 missed calls. The top comment was from the mother of the child who was outraged about it. She wrote a very long comment about how my post was disrespectful of the tragedy that happened that day and how dare I post that and not mention her child. And of course, talking to her first. Thirty comments later, and it was clear that the entire family had clearly started to take sides in this battle that I didn't realize that I created.

As of today, we're at 150 comments. My friends and my parents are involved too. Half of his family is screaming for me to take it down, apologize to the parents and show more respect. Possibly by even celebrating our anniversary on a different day. Some of the family think that we should still be able to celebrate our anniversary on the actual day, but just keep it offline to keep the peace. I don't think I did anything wrong with that post and I feel like we should be able to celebrate our anniversary just like anyone else. I'm not celebrating the tragedy, I'm celebrating my wedding, I'm hiding the butthole, and

then OP posted an edit. I've changed the post to only be visible to me and deleted all the comments to try to stop the arguing, but from the email that we just received, those comments were just a symptom of a larger problem. My mother-in-law sent us an email with from what I can tell roughly three quarters of my husband's family's CC'd on it. His parents, grandparents, and the parents of the child not only think that we should pick a different day to celebrate our wedding, but they're also demanding a second wedding. According to them, they've kept

their silence for so long due to shock and being distracted by everything else going on this year. But they feel that because of what happened, we aren't really married yet in the family. They understand that weddings are expensive, so my husband's parents offer to completely pay for the second wedding that will be the real wedding in the family's eyes. And because it may be a year or two before this can be done safely, they will tolerate us living in sin indefinitely due to the circumstances. My husband hates arguing with his family, and I'm not sure how I would even approach us with my family without being laughed out of the room.

So we need to talk about what to do with this. Down in the comments, I'm going to read this post from Superfast Mama, which I pretty much agree with. Everyone sucks here, but for crying out loud, take the post down. On the one hand is a family with a dead child facing the one year anniversary of their loss. It's unimaginable pain. On the other hand, is your need to have people comment on how pretty your wedding was until you happy anniversary.

Their pain far outweighs your need for likes. Why you didn't block the family of the dead child from your post is beyond my ability to comprehend. As soon as you saw it was causing pain, you delete the post. Of course, you can celebrate your anniversary all you want. Just not visible to these people who have a dead child. Show some compassion. Also, what's the deal with your in-laws? They've basically decided on their own that your wedding doesn't count and you're living in sin because they just don't like the way that you're married.

What a bunch of jerks! I think I would say they're just about the only people here who aren't the butthole is the parent of the dead kid. Am I the butthole for deciding that I won't give any Christmas gifts this year after my mom cancelled a transaction on my card? I'm a student. I have a student bank account where my college gives me money for transportation or scholarship. These kinds of bank accounts have no fees, but are age restricted. You can't have one if you're over 25 years old,

so it needs an overseer. When I asked the bank about it, they told me it's just a security thing, so I chose my mom because she's more tech savvy than my dad. Well, through some incredible luck, I managed to get top grades last year, so I was awarded a study scholarship. Great!

I've been saving up my money, looking forward to Black Friday, eyeing an amazing drawing tablet. I do digital art, and the tablet that I was eyeing is as big as my monitor and is all around amazing. Black Friday rolls in, and Amazon has it in stock at an amazing price. A price that I could afford. I was so freaking happy and I ordered it. Then I got a notice that the bank refused the card.

I emailed Amazon and we went over the card details and such making sure it was right. It was and they advised me to call my bank. It was odd. I had purchased things online in the past with this card and it went through. I had enough money for the tablet, even extra, so I thought maybe they had technical difficulties. But it was too late in the day to call and they don't work on weekends so I left an email. I found out today that for big transactions they asked for an agreement from the overseer and that my overseer cancelled the transaction. I was like WTF in front

of my mom about it, who throughout the weekend acted oblivious. And she told me that, of course, I couldn't let you throw away money on something that you don't need. And she also said, you wouldn't have money for Christmas presents if you bought that. Then she had the audacity to ask me what I was planning to get my family this year. I told her they won't get anything more than a shadow from me, and I went to my room and cried on the carpet. I missed out on the Black Friday deal. I can't afford that tablet anymore and it's all because my mom wanted Christmas gifts. And no, I'm not gonna get her anything. Last year she got me

a blouse that was too small for me and that she later took for herself. She can gift herself this year too. Not the butthole OP. Your mom sounds like a controlling douchebag. If I were you, I would remove your mom from your bank account immediately. Am I the Butthole for selling my family home because my pregnant sister-in-law ate my dinner? Before I start this story, I want to point out that me and my brother have two different fathers. I've been 19-year-old girl, and I lost my father last year due to cancer. He left me 90% of his

stuff, including his family home that was left to him by his dad. It's been in their family for over a hundred years. My older brother, who's 34, and my dad didn't have a relationship, but he did leave him $10,000. My mom was pissed at the well reading, but since she got $10,000, she couldn't do anything about it. For the past year, me and my mom have lived okay together. My mom went on acting like my house was hers, which I had no problem with, until and may my brother and his 30-year-old girlfriend

moved in without even asking me. They're messy, entitled, and rude, and I told him in July I want them out by September because they don't pay for anything or wash a dish. In August, they announced that they were pregnant and my sister-in-law smuggly said, guess we won't be moving out now. That didn't go down well, but when I told them I wanted them out, my mom and brother basically

laughed in my face. Well, the past few months have been hell. They've basically become worse than before, and my mom enables it, then demands me to treat my sister-in-law like a princess because she's pregnant. I once had to wait outside McDonald's till they opened to get her a muck muffin. Well, this is where I might be the butthole. Because my sister-in-law is pregnant, she eats everything she sees, like the cupcakes my friend made me for my birthday.

She ate all six, and I didn't even get to try them. I can't even make my lunch the night before, because I go to get it it'll be gone. And she'll have a smug look on her face while rubbing her belly then laugh and say, I couldn't help myself, blame the baby! If I put stuff in my room, my mom will open the door with a spare key so sister-in-law can go through my mini fridge. Well a week ago, I was running late to college and I didn't have time for my breakfast or to make lunch. And I had to go to work straight after, so all I had that day was a bar of chocolate. When I got home, I was starving. I made myself dinner and while it was cooling down, I went to use the bathroom. I must have been in there 10 minutes at most, and by the time I came

out, my sister-in-law had eaten 70% of my dinner. And I lost my cool, and of course my sister and law started crying. So my mom and brother started screaming at me for making her cry, making excuses like how she couldn't help it, and it was my fault for leaving food around her. Well, I had enough, but here's the thing. Back in October, my uncle offered me a live-changing amount of money for the house. So I called him up crying a few days ago explaining the situation, and he said that he'd buy the house and would have picked him up crying a few days ago explaining the situation and he said that he'd buy the house and would have vicked my mom and brother. They of course

didn't take it too well and had to stay with their friends. I've been receiving texts and I'm being tagged in multiple posts on social media. I'm starting to think that I'm the bad person now. So am I the butthole for making my mom and sister homeless? Okay, what on earth is wrong with your brother and your mother? They're not treating you like family, so why should you treat them like family? Your family sounds super toxic, and I wouldn't trust a word that comes out of their mouth. I have to wonder if there's an R-slash raised by Narcissus situation going on here, because

your mom is obviously toxic, and it seems like she might be treating your brother like the golden child. So while I would definitely recommend kicking them out of your house, I don't know if selling your home is really the right decision right now. Selling something that your father gave you this worth presumably over a hundred thousand dollars is really risky when emotions are high. I mean you'll be homeless too and you might regret letting go of something that your father gave you. So, a victor family? Yes, sell the house? Probably no. Are you the butthole? Definitely not. That was our slash of my The Butthole, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out a new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.