rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole For Marrying My Step-Brother?

Episode Date: April 28, 2021

r/AmITheA**hole OP is stuck in a real pickle... kind of like how girls get stuck in the washing machine, if you know what I mean. OP's mother secretly marries her fiancé's father, which means that her fiancé has suddenly become her step-brother! OP's mother is now telling OP that she can't marry her fiancé because they're step-siblings, and that would be wrong. OP wants to go along with it anyway, because their parents violated their trust by getting married in secret and sabotaging their wedding. Is OP the butthole for wanting to marry her step-bro, or are their parents the buttholes? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Welcome to R-slash, a podcast where I read the best post from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-slash and My The Butthole, where someone nearly kills a 10-month-old baby. Am I the butthole for kicking out my brother-in-law after he made my 10-month-old son spend the night in a stroller? I'm a 37-year-old guy.

I have a 10-month-old son with my wife, and recently our son has started sleeping in his own room. We live in a small apartment. My wife works for a marketing company, and it requires her to go on trips at least once a month. She invited her 27-year-old brother to stay with us for a few weeks since he lost his job and he's incapable of paying rent. I didn't think that it was a good idea since our place is small. She said that he was okay with spending time on the couch and since he loves to spend

time with his nephew then there shouldn't be any problems. I said okay and I helped him move his stuff in. My wife went on her business trip last week and it was just me, him, and my son in the apartment. My brother-in-law begged me to let his girlfriend come spend the night and I had reasons to decline, mainly because he talked so much about missing her and certainly he went into passionately hug. I said there would not be any passion hugging on the couch, period. When I went to sleep, he was still talking on his phone. At around 3.45am, I woke up to the sound of my son crying. The sound was closer than it should be, so I was confused. I walked out of my bedroom, and I saw my son in his stroller in the living room with his face covered in a blanket. I had no idea how long he was there for, so I yelled my brother-in-law's name and I was

very confused. I called my son down when I went to his room. That's when my brother-in-law stopped me from going into my son's room because he said his girlfriend was in there. I was livid. I asked what the hell is she doing in there, but I already knew. I started loudly yelling at my brother-in-law for taking my son out of his room and leaving him in the living room causing him to stress out. I told him to leave immediately. He asked me if I could take my

son into my room. I kept arguing with him. I kicked him and his girlfriend out of my son's room, and at 7 a.m. I kicked him out of the apartment. He then called my wife and said that I kicked him out just because he suggested that he bring his girlfriend over. My wife thought that I handled it wrong despite explaining myself, and that led to an argument with her as well. My wife's entire side of the family is calling me a jerk for kicking him out and treating him like that. They said it was no big deal and that I made a scene over nothing, but I couldn't help but feel mad at him and his girlfriend. All right, so first things first.

I don't know exactly when this is relevant in terms of a baby's growth, but I know for a fact that with some babies you can't put a blanket over their face because they don't have the knowledge or the strength to pull it off their face, so they could literally suffocate. I don't know if that's a problem with 10 month old babies, but I wouldn't be surprised if it still is. So just in that sense alone, your brother-in-law may have literally endangered your son's life. Also, he kicked out your son and made him sleep in a stroller so he could passionately

hug his girlfriend in a child's room. Opie, I will agree that kicking him out is a bit of a strong reaction. But that being said, I definitely agree with you on this. What I mean is, kicking your brother-in-law out of the house is a strong, but in this case warranted reaction. So, even though you're justified, I'm not surprised that your family got upset at you about that. Overall OP, your brother-in-law is pretty selfish. I'm giving your brother-in-law three out of five buttholes. If a 10-month-old baby is still in that range where a blanket over the face could literally kill him, then he gets the full 5 out of 5 buttholes,

but I don't actually know about that. OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. All right, so actually going down in the comments, it sounds like I was right. The user haymaker says, not the butthole, your brother-in-law almost killed your baby. This cannot be overstated. A baby cannot be left alone with a blanket over their head. Sleeping in the stroller on a tent is depends on the stroller on the baby, but the blanket is a huge hazard. If your wife doesn't recognize the issue, then parenting classes might be in order. Yeah, see, that's what I was afraid of. Babies have these little tiny T-Rex arms and they're very weak and they don't have great brains, so if you put a blanket over a baby's face or if you put a baby face down, then

they could put their mouths over top of the cloth and just literally suffocate themselves. It's awful. So yeah, OP, in this case your brother-in-law gets the full 5 out of 5 butthole score. Potentially killing a baby just so we can get laid? What a douchebag. Am I the butthole for not changing my baby's name again after I change it for my sister once already? I have a 9 year old daughter and another daughter on the way. I have two grandmothers, grandma Annabelle and grandma Rose. I named my oldest daughter Annabelle after my grandma Annabelle. I didn't name her after grandma Rose because at the time of my daughter's birth, grandma

Rose was still with us. When I found out that I was pregnant with my second daughter, I decided to name her after my grandma Rose who passed away in 2017. My sister, Lucy, got pregnant about five months before me. She said that she wants to name her baby Rose after grandma Rose. I said that our kids can just share the name. She says that I already have Annabelle and I could have named her Annabelle Rose or something, but I passed up the chance so I can't also have Rose. I figured this hill isn't worth dying on, so I say I look for something else, but I reserve the right to use Rose. I then crack open a baby book, and a few entries after Rose is Rosalie.

It's perfect. It honors grandma Rose, it doesn't piss off Lucy, and my boyfriend loves it. Lucy finds out the new name and says that it's lovely and she approves, which annoys me but I say nothing. This all takes place in the 8th month of her pregnancy in the 3rd month of mine. So I don't even know the gender yet, this is all hypothetical. A couple of weeks later Lucy gives birth. A few days ago, about a month after the birth, she announces that her daughter's name

is Rosalie. At this point I am really annoyed because I went to great lengths to leave the name Rose available and she stole in my choice. My mom calls me to say that she knew what Lucy was planning and she hopes that I'm not upset because this means that I can now name my incoming daughter Rose except that now I'm attached to the name Rosalie. I told my mom that I'm sticking with the name Rosalie. My mom said that Lucy has Rosalie. I say there's going to be two Rosalie. I told my mom that I'm sticking with the name Rosalie. My mom said that Lucy has Rosalie. I say there's gonna be two Rosalie's in the family. She says that's impractical because both Rosalie's will have the same last name, and they'll likely be in the same

school and year group, so this will cause all manner of issues. I say if it is going to be an issue, then I'll just deal with it when it comes up. Lucy then calls me and says that I'm an inconsiderate prick and that I'm being petty. That I don't have a monopoly on the name and that she can name her kid what she likes. I say that's all true so by the same logic I can use Rosalie. She says there can't be two Rosalie's because it'll cause problems and I say that she's the only one who has a problem with it. So she can change her kid's name or deal with it. She again called me an inconsiderate, spiteful butthole and hung up.

My mom, dad, and her brother Lucy are all taking Lucy's side. Am I the butthole? I would say in this story, everyone's a butthole. Basically, you and your sister are using your own kids to fight with each other. There are a billion, a million, trillion names out there, and both of you are gonna dig in your heels and say, no, you have to have that name. Yes, OP, you do have a point that you chose Rose first, and also you have a point that you chose Rosalie first. And yes, also your sister has a point that you got to name your kid after a grandma first, so theoretically it's her turn next. In any event, who cares? It's just a name. Please don't give your two cousins the same first and last

name just because you're both too petty to back down. OP, you get one out of five butthole. Your sister gets one point five out of five buttholes. Your family members get one out of five buttholes. Your sister gets 1.5 out of five buttholes. Your family members get one out of five buttholes for unfairly picking sides. Down in the comments because Sandra Knox has it best. Everyone sucks here, because this could cause issues for your daughter. Think of her in this. For example, what if cousin Rosalie post something inappropriate on social media while your Rosalie is looking for a job. Of course, this happens with unrelated people all the time, but these two Rosalie's may look alike and they'll be from the same area.

And both Rosalie's will have to deal with the irritating consequences of having the exact same name in the same school. I don't think that you're thinking about your daughter here, only how mad you are your butthole sister. I've watched my father and his cousin deal with the exact same thing and it ranges from an annoyance to an actual problem. The job example that I gave actually happened to them. Don't make your daughter the other rosalie to your sister's original rosalie. It's not fair to her. So you think you know sports? Point's bet is the sportsbook for you because we've got the features for true competitors like live same game parlays. Use your sportsmarts to make

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against 14 preventable diseases. Learn more at Canada.ca slash childhood vaccines. A message from the government of Canada. Am I the butthole for telling my brother-in-law that I am not his kid's mother? My brother-in-law's name is Connor. He's my husband's brother, and his wife passed away over a year ago. I had a good relationship with her and their two kids. This loss has affected everyone.

The family got together to help Connor with the kids. He used to have an apartment, but he hasn't worked in over a year, and my in-laws were unable to pay for his rent anymore. My husband asked if Connor and the kids could stay with us temporarily. I immediately agreed and found time to get everything ready. Once Connor arrived, he did little to nothing when it came to the kids. I started taking care of the kids' needs because he asked. I handled feeding, cleaning, and playing activities. But kids are in constant need of care and attention. Every time that is three-year-old would ask him to make a sandwich or help with the bathroom

or putting on clothes or anything, Connor would just point at me and say, oh, he will do it. So I end up taking care of it even though he has nothing to do. He's always either on his laptop or sleeping. One time his five year old was calling for him to help him with something in the shower. Connor asked me to go instead. I got annoyed. Then he shrugged his shoulders saying that he would just ignore his son then. Which again resulted in me handling it because I couldn't ignore it. My husband's a dentist and he's not often home. I work from home, but I'm not always available.

I made this clear to Connor and he said that it's no problem and that'll handle it. Yesterday, I had an important online meeting. I was at my desk and suddenly my three-year-old nephew was knocking on the door, winning me to help him because he wet himself. And his father told him to come to me. I cleaned my nephew up and took him to the bathroom.

As a result, I was kicked out of the online meeting. I was mad, so I went to see what Connor was busy with. He was playing an online game and talking to a lady. I asked him about it, and he brushed me off. I unplugged his device and told him that his neglect cost me a meeting, and that I already told him that my work can't be interrupted to take care of kids. And that I already told him that my work can't be interrupted to take care of his kids while he ignores him in a voice responsibility. He criticized me, saying

a few minutes won't hurt, and brought up how overwhelmed he was and that he needed help. I snapped. I yelled at him that I am not his kid's mother. He was staggered. Clearly, what I said made him too upset to react. He argued with me then left the house. My in-laws took issue with what I said. They called it awful treatment towards someone who lost their wife so recently.

They would offer to help and then make up some excuse. They said I need someone to give me a talking to so I could learn some empathy for those poor kids. My husband said that I was right to be upset, but I heard Connor by what I said, and I shouldn't have handled it like that, making him feel like he and his kids are a burden. They're expecting me to apologize to him. What really gets me is that Conor posts pictures of his kids on Facebook talking about how he's taking so much effort to keep these kids healthy and happy while I'm the one doing

all the work. He basically lies and pretends to be a caring parent on Facebook. That makes me so upset. I have no idea why he does this. My in-laws don't understand that working from home is also stressful. They claimed it's not real work and that I was just making excuses and causing arguments. Alright, so I get that Connor lost his wife so he's grieving, and even a year after her death, he can still be grieving pretty hard. But that being said, based on this story, it doesn't sound like he's grieving super hard. What it sounds like is he's taking advantage of his family's help so he can avoid being a father and instead spend all this time playing video games and getting

laid. As bad as it is to lose your spouse, that doesn't free you of your responsibility to raise your kids. OP, I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving Connor three out of five buttholes. Stop being lazy and be a father to your kids already! Am I the butthole for getting mad about my mom marrying my fiancee's dad? I'm a 24 year old woman and I've been together with my fiancee a 24 year old guy since my sophomore year of college, so around 5 years now. For context, my mom, who's 50, hadn't affair with a coworker when I was 16, which led

to my parents' divorce. She's been single ever since. She's been on dates, but she hasn't had a serious relationship. I have a good relationship with my dad and his new wife. Sadly, my fiance's mom passed away 2 years ago due to cancer and his dad, whose 53 has been single ever since. My fiance proposed to me last year, but our wedding was delayed due to COVID. Our families had never met because his family lives in South Carolina, whereas mine lives in North Carolina, which is about three hours away. Three months ago, in January 2021, we decided that it was time to have our families meet

for the first time to discuss our upcoming wedding in June. My dad and his wife, my fiance's dad, and my mom all met at our place to discuss the wedding. This one fine, but there was some tension between my mom and my dad. This morning, out of the blue, my mom called me and announced that she had aloved. I was shocked because she hadn't been dating anyone to my knowledge.

Upon questioning, it turns out that she and my fiance's dad had been dating in secret since that meeting in January. And they just got married in secret yesterday, which means my fiance is now my stepbrother. I want to throw up just thinking about this. She said that I should now cancel my wedding because it would be inappropriate to marry my step-brother. I'm absolutely horrified. I shouted at my mom, saying that she just loves ruining my life. And I called her selfish. First she cheated on my dad, and now she wouldn't marry my fiancée's dad, knowing full well that I was about to marry my fiancee.

My mom then said that I was still young, and I'd have the chance to meet someone new. But she's old, and I have to take every opportunity I can get. And she called me an ungrateful b-word for not approving of her marriage. She then accused me of winning her to die alone. I don't think that I'm the butthole, but I just wanted to make sure because ultimately I don't want her to have to be alone. Even though I think she did that to herself by hurting my dad. I think that I should be allowed to marry my fiance because we met first. I'm also 12 weeks pregnant

with my fiance's kids, so that complicates matters even more. We haven't told anybody yet. Am I the butthole for being mad about my mom marrying my fiance's dad, and because she said that I can't marry my fiance anymore? OP, your mom is categorically the butthole here. First of all, she dated the one person on earth that she shouldn't be allowed to date. Actually, the second person on Earth behind your fiance himself. She should have known not to date your fiance's father. And I mean, the same goes for him.

Your fiance's father should have known not to date your mom. Your two parents are both disgusting human beings. And the fact that they dated in secret and then got married in secret pretty much proves that they knew that they were doing something wrong. And then, after violating her responsibility as a parent, she tries to tell you that you're not allowed to marry your fiance.

Give me a break. OP, you should feel completely empowered to marry your fiance. Even though he's technically your step-brother, honestly, I don't see why that makes any difference. You're both adults, you're not related by blood, you just have sucky parents. Also, let's be honest, you live in the south, so no one will care if you marry a family member. Plus, you have the added bonus of every single time your fiance tries to get frisky, you can say, what are you doing, stepbrother? Anyways, OP, I give you and your fiance zero out of five buttholes. I give each of your parents four out of five buttholes That was our slash amide the butthole and this is our slash puppy bloopers

So I cleaned up my nephew and took him to the bathroom Hugo buddy, it's okay. It's okay, Pupper Dog Do you mind? I... You go. You go, boy. I clean my nephew up and tuck him to the bed.

You go. Can you stop whining, please? What do you got? Is that a toy? Is it play time? Is it play time? Is it play time? All right, let's go play. you