rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole For Refusing To Be Friends With A N*zi?

Episode Date: November 17, 2020

r/AmITheA**hole OP practices Brazilia Jiu-Jitsu at a local gym. A new guy joins the gym, the the guy is absolutely covered with tattoos from a certain organization that I can't even say the name of on YouTube. Let's just say it starts with the letter "N." OP refuses to train with the guy, and other people in the gym say that OP is being a butthole by being disruptive. Is OP the butthole in this situation? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Conditions Apply. Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best posts from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash, am I the butthole where OP's mom gets exposed as a lying traitor? Am I the butthole for not taking my pregnant homophobic sister in? I'm a 27 year old woman. My 20 year old sister and I do not get along. I'm gay and when she was 14 she started being horrible to me. Calling me slurs and saying I was gonna burn and hell in other typical religious homophobic things. She's the golden child so obviously my parents sided with her. She would make me cry and they would tell me to deal with it an unexpected me to still be nice to her After a while I cut them all out of my life best decision ever

Three years ago. I married the love of my life My parents were invited but they didn't show no doubt because of my sister That still hurts my wife Ellen. I are very lucky and have amazing jobs in a big house About a week ago my parents and sister showed up at my house and wanted to talk to me. As a quick aside, I have no idea how they know where I live. It turns out that my sister is pregnant, and they essentially want me to let her move in for free and pay for everything for her and her baby. There was no apology for anything.

I was in shock, and my sister was going off about how we have so much space and we could afford to help her out. I said no. I told them we couldn't take her in, because we currently have L's too little half-sister saying with us because their mom is very high-risk, so we don't have any more space. They were pissed and were going off about how I was supposed to help my family, and that I was choosing L's family over my own. I told them that they were not my family and that I was choosing Elle's family over my own. I told them that they were not my family. I reminded them of everything they did and said to me and they said I

needed to let go and move on. I asked them to leave, even if we had this face I wouldn't want to hear. Since then, I've gotten so many messages from them and other family members saying I need to help them and take her in. I reminded them of what she was like to me and they said that I need to be the bigger person and that this will bring us together. The thing is, my parents are gonna have to take money out of their retirement fund if I don't help. They were good parents growing up. When my sister started her BS, I was already out of the house. So, people have said that I would really be helping them, not my sister. I also said that we could give her some money, but I don't want to do that either. Am I the butthole?

OP, your parents backed up your sister when she called you homophobic slurs and treated you like garbage and then they skipped your wedding. And you're saying that they're good parents? Listen OP, I don't want to be harsh here because you're definitely the victim in this story, but your parents are not good parents. I definitely think that you made the right decision to cut them in your sister out of your life. Also, it's funny how all of your family is saying that you need to be the bigger person, but meanwhile, it's soly okay if your parents insist to keep being small-minded people. OP, you get zero out of five buttholes, and your family gets four out of five buttholes. Please don't let your family emotionally manipulate

you. Am I the butthole for telling co-workers extremely bluntly why I'm not participating in the office weight loss bet? Someone got the brilliant idea to make an office diet bet due to COVID gains, with people pulling in their money to see you can lose the most weight by Thanksgiving. I'm one of 7 people not participating. Lots of pregnant ladies, some bodybuilders, and people who maintain their weight who aren't interested. Since I've visibly gained weight, they thought that I'd want to participate, but I didn't. Jin, who was in charge of everything, kept dropping by to remind me to turn in my form

and my money. I said no thanks, but Jin wouldn't drop it. Other people got involved asking me, why not? It'll be fun. Don't be scared, you'll look better and feel better. And it's a great way to bond, we're all in it together, it's like wait watchers. I started saying I'm not interested, and then eventually I said no, drop it. They decided that I wanted them to convince me. Two weeks into the bed, they tried to trick the scale to shock me. I contacted HR and people finally backed down. I'm eating my food one day, rice and beans, and people sitting with me start dropping hints

at how they feel so much better now that they aren't eating carby comfort food all the time. I said, I'm glad you feel better. They took this as encouragement and started saying that I could join up again. I finally effing snapped and said, You guys suck, I'm a recovering anorexic.

I get one whiff of competition and start starving myself for days and start puking up what I do eat until I have to get my third oral surgery to remove rotting teeth. Does that sound worth it to you? Cure the chorus of, wow, and we were just joking. I said no, you weren't just joking. Congratulations, by the way. After you all wouldn't stop, I weighed myself for the first time in seven years and didn't need for two days. Does that make you all feel good? None of them would look me in the eye, so I just went home for the day.

I got a call from the woman in HR who were shockingly supportive of me. One of the bodybuilder guys stepped up and said he's witnessed a lot of harassment, and he doesn't blame me for my outburst. A few others did too. However, they had to cancel the diet bet. I didn't ask them to, and people are blaming me. Saying that I can't take a joke, it wasn't that deep, and the girls' presence had no longer feel safe working with me because I obviously have mental issues. One of them made a big stink about politically correct BS and how I'm

the typical hypersensitive millennial. I go back and forth on this all day, thinking I should have just swallowed my anger and gone back to HR, or just stopped eating lunch in the office or whatever. I didn't mean to ruin everyone's fun, but I also feel justified in pushing back on their harassment. Am I the butthole? O.P., you're asking if you're the butthole for standing up against harassment in the workplace? No, you're not the butthole. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes and I'm giving your co-workers 2 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the buttole for telling my husband he's either married to me or as co-worker? I'm a 37 year old woman and my 40 year old husband has been working at the same company

for 10 years as a maintenance supervisor. About a year ago, they hired Tapeth at work at their accounting department. Since the day that she first started working there, she's had an infatuation with my husband that has now becoming unprofessional and inappropriate. This started when the heat went out in our office. My husband's job as a supervisor is to assign tasks to his employees, however, tapetha is never satisfied with the work they do. Even though he says that they do great work, so she demands that he work in our office.

She constantly calls him on his work phone for mundane things. The carpet is loose in a corner, a loose screw on our coat hook, and he goes and fixes them without issue. Last year when we went to the company Christmas party, she was very 40 with him and constantly grabbed his hand. When he introduced us, she just granted me and said, look there's Peter and grabbed his hand and walked away. When we sat at the table, she practically pushed me out of my seat to sit next to him, and my husband told her to get up that that was my seat. She walked

off in a huff, and when she saw me in the restroom, she shoved past me. I told my husband what happened, and he said it was fine, that she was harmless. I told him that she was not fine, and that she clearly had feelings for him, and she was actually like a jealous girlfriend. The past few weeks, this is ramped up to an astonishing level of inappropriate. Tabitha recently moved into a new house and my husband and some of the other guys from work helped her move and put things together. He gave her his personal cell phone number and she's been calling and texting nonstop about things she needs help with.

Multiple times a day at all hours of the day and night she'll call and text them for help. Last night at 2am, she called about her heat not working right. My husband said that he would go over and look at it after work. I broke down. I told him he wasn't going that she could call a technician like anyone else and that he's not her personal maintenance man. I told him very clearly that she has feelings for him and he's so dense that he can't see it. I told him that while it's nice to help on occasion, she calls him all the time asking for help with things that she can do on her own, like mood boxes or furniture. Or she can pay to have a repair person come and fix it. I told him that once he gave out his personal phone number that he

crossed a line and I'm not comfortable with it. He said that he would most likely be an easy fix and it won't take long. So I cried and told him that he can either be married to me or married to her, but I wasn't going to be the third wheel in my own marriage. He says that he doesn't have feelings for and that I'm overreacting to him just wanting to help a friend. I feel otherwise. Am I the butthole? Fandule Casinos' exclusive live dealer studio has your chance at the number one feeling. Winning, which beats even the 27th best feeling, saying I do. Who wants to slasperish you? I do. Enjoy the number one feeling. Winning, in an exciting live dealer studio, exclusively on Fandule Casinos, where winning

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Perfume from Mom? Points for me. Gaming Council for the Kids? Points for me? Chalkets for the Teachers? Oh yeah, points for me. Shoppers, you should totally go, exclusions apply. OP, you set clear, reasonable boundaries

and your husband is just outright ignoring them. I'm really only seeing three options here. Either your husband's an idiot, a jerk, or is already cheating on you. Either way, you get zero out of five buttholes and your husband gets anywhere between one to five buttholes depending on what's really going on here. Tabitha gets 4 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for hacking my mom's Instagram to see if she violated a non-disclosure agreement?

I'm a nanny for a high profile family. I signed a very extensive and strict NDA. Anyone directly involved in my life, my mom, dad, sister, and husband also signed an NDA. My nanny family recommended this so I could talk about the job without getting into any legal trouble or putting them at risk. Recently, I ran into one of my parents' neighbors, Amber, at the park. Amber asked how the new job was going, then proceeded to ask specific questions about

how it must be working for a family where the parents have such and such jobs. This was a direct violation of the NDA and something that I could be fired and sued for. My dad isn't the sharing type, like at all, so I figured that it was probably my mom. I asked her about it in a casual way, like, hey, how's Amber? I said that I ran into Amber at the park and that it was odd because she knew details about my job without me telling her. My mom simply shrugged and said, That's funny, maybe she googled or saw something on social media? My dad insists they're absolutely hate Amber. They essentially said hell would have to freeze over before they spoke to her willingly.

My dad ended our conversation where I asked him about it by saying, The only thing I know about her is that her son just made partner at a law firm in New York and is making bank and that's only because mom saw it on Instagram and told me about it. Right then, I knew my mom lied to me and it was her. She and Amber loved to one up each other with their kids success and I also landed a great new job. I asked my mom about it again and she told me that I was being dramatic, making stuff up, and that she would never do that to me. My mom doesn't text people, she only deems on Instagram. I know her passwords, so I logged in to check her messages. There was an extremely long DM to Amber where she shared their professions, kids names, ages, private school,

general locations of their homes, how they pay really well, etc. Everything that were legally not allowed to say, she said. I called her immediately and said that I logged into her DMs and saw the message she's in Amber which was a violation. She started screaming at me about how she's supposed to be able to trust her daughter. She can't believe that I hacked into her Instagram that mother should be allowed to brag about their children and then she hung up. It's been about a week without contact between the two of us. We used to speak every single day. I'm starting to believe that maybe I'm the butthole here for

violating her trust like that. My husband says that if anyone violated trust here, it's her. And that I gave her ample opportunity to tell the truth before I intervened and sought the truth myself. He constantly reminds me that they could sue us into the ground and fire me for endangering my nanny family's well-being. Because truthfully, Amber could easily be a psycho fan or sell the information to someone who is, so am I the butthole? Let's get this straight.

Your mom's upset at you because you didn't respect her privacy, but she didn't respect your privacy when she literally signed a contract saying that she would respect your privacy, or more specifically the privacy of the nanny family. So not only is your mom a complete hypocrite and disrespectful of your job, but she also literally endangered the life of the nanny family. I remember while I was watching a YouTube video of one of those family blogging channels, and I don't typically watch those channels so I can't remember what the specific channel was. But this family had one young girl who I want to say was like 8 or 10, and the family

was talking about how one of the unfortunate side effects of having a family vlog is that the daughter had crazy stalkers. These stalkers was in these little girls grossly inappropriate messages and whenever the family had some sort of public event, they would show up and try to speak to the little girl. They send her gifts, just all kinds of really creepy red flag behavior. So when OP says it is violation of the NDA puts the nanny family a danger, she's really not kidding. Opie, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your mom 3.5 out of 5 buttholes.

Am I the butthole for refusing to train with someone who's part of a group that's so evil that I can't even say the name of it on YouTube? So I've practiced Brazilian jujitsu for a couple of years, mostly attending classes that require a workout outfit. That means that our bodies are pretty much covered, this is important. A new dude joined our gym recently. I saw him in class, but I didn't roll with him. Last week, I attended a class where we don't wear outfits, and the coach pairs me up with the new guy. The new guy wears a sleeveless rash guard with lots of tattoos on both his arms and legs.

I look at his tattoos, and there's a big black tattoo on his arm of a symbol that I can't say the name of, but they were pretty common during World War II. As I take a closer look, there's also the SS symbol, the one that looks like Thunderbolts. There's some other symbols here and there as well like the Celtic Cross. I tell my coach that I want to be paired up with someone else. The coach finds me a new partner, but after the class, ask me what's wrong. I tell him that the guy has lots of tattoos from that organization that starts with the letter in, and I don't roll with those people.

Now the coach has mad at me for bringing politics into the gym. I told my coach that he's bringing politics into the gym by allowing a guy to walk around with those symbols on his arm. Some of the guys from the class are behind me, and something that I'm making a big deal out of nothing. Am I the butthole for refusing to roll with those people? Down in the comments, I'm going to read this reply from Oxbridge comma. Not the butthole. Not wanting to associate with those people isn't bringing in politics, since they represent a group that believes in the mass murder of minorities. And then Hangnell Polar says, Exactly.

Being against that organization isn't taking a political stance. It's human decency. Yeah, OP, I'm giving you zero out of five buttolls. It's not political or wrong to say that you disagree with a group that's so evil that I literally can't even say the name of this group on YouTube without getting my video demonetized. This group of people is literally like Voldemort level evil. They're like, he whose name shall not be spoken. You get zero out of five buttholes OP and I'm giving your coach four out of five buttholes.

He's trying to make it seem like you're the bad guy when in reality. He's just trying to suppress the issue so that he can take in more money from this dude. 5 buttholes. every single day.