rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole For Telling My Girlfriend I Saw Her Daughter's Butthole?
Episode Date: March 20, 2021r/AmITheA**hole OP is an older gentleman who's dating the mother of an adult daughter. OP searches the daughter's username on Google hoping to find the daughter's Instagram. Instead, he finds her Redd...it account, which she uses to post ~adult~ pictures. He immediately exits out of the page, but it's too late: he saw pictures of body parts that he definitely shouldn't have seen. He told his girlfriend about it, and now his girlfriend and the daughter are upset at OP. Is the butthole for looking at a butthole? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best post
from our cross-reddit.
Today's subreddit is R-Slash and My The Butthole,
where OP accidentally sees his daughter-in-law's butthole.
Eh, what?
What? Am I the butthole for telling my girlfriend I saw her daughter's butt hole?
I'm a 44-year-old guy and I started dating a 45-year-old woman back in December.
Her daughter, who's 20, moved down in January from out of state and staying with my girlfriend
until she gets settled.
Her daughter's a good kid, we get along well and she even gets along with my son, who's
13.
A few weeks ago, the daughter asked if she could use Snapchat to send me videos of the
paintings they're doing in the house, videos of their dog, etc.
Later, my girlfriend mentioned a picture of one of the dogs that her daughter posted on
Instagram.
Knowing that many people use the same username across multiple platforms, I did a Google
search using her Snapchat username.
The second search result was a redder profile.
I think, oh cool, I love reddit, and I click the link to her profile.
It turns out she uses reddit to post pictures for her only fans page.
I see a thumbnail of what can only be described as a type of picture you might see at a
Proctology office.
I closed the page and went back to the Google search results and read the summaries on
the links instead of just looking at the domain like I was before.
All of the links were related to her only fans' content, mixed in with her personal info.
Anyone who's been on the internet for a while knows that this is a recipe for disaster.
Hell, I'm even using a throwaway for this post, and it doesn't have a pick of my butthole
in it.
I just don't want this story associated with my main account.
I talk to a few of my female friends who have daughters to see how bad it would be if I tell my girlfriend what happened. It's not like there's advice for this
topic over on our slash dating over 40. The general consensus was that I had to tell my
girlfriend due to the safety risk. Last week I told my girlfriend and I showed her how
to search her daughter's username because my girlfriend isn't tech savvy at all. I showed
her how it only took four steps to go from her daughter's only fans page to the location sharing of Snapchat and then see her house. I told her,
I'm not condoning what she's doing, but if she's gonna do it, she needs to be more careful.
My girlfriend told her daughter to go her only fans name, and it of course returned a lot of stuff,
and the daughter freaked out. The daughter put two and two together knowing that her mom isn't
savvy enough to figure this out on her own and texted me about finding it.
I admitted to her about how it all went down, minus the details about finding the picture.
The daughter accused me of stalking her and looking for her nudes because I must be a
pervert. I explained, I didn't go looking for them, it's not like I subscribed to our
only fans page. But I told her, if it was that easy for me to find her pictures, then it would be just as easy for a stranger to find her in real life
too.
Like I told my girlfriend, it's one thing to show your bits online for strangers.
It's another thing when they knock on your door.
So now my daughter thinks I'm a creep that went looking for her nudes.
My girlfriend isn't talking to me, and I need to know if I'm the butthole here for telling
my girlfriend. Opie, you I'm the butthole here for telling my girlfriend.
Opie, you're not the butthole here. When you do a Google search of someone's name,
the last thing you expect to see is that person's butthole. So, you searching the daughter's name
is perfectly innocent. It's not like you specifically went snooping to find her naughty photos.
They were just there out in the public for anyone to see. Honestly, I'm amazed
that someone in 2021 can be this oblivious when it comes to online privacy. Why on earth
would you use the same username for your only fans and your personal Snapchat? And then
post pictures of your house on that Snapchat? Oh my god. Oh, P, I think you did the right
thing here. That being said, no good
deed goes unpunished, and I think that's definitely the case here. I would be very surprised
if your relationship survives this. I can't blame the girlfriend for never wanting to be around
you again, and I can't blame the daughter for never wanting to see you again either.
So, unfortunately, OP, I think your relationship is probably dead after that one.
OP, you deserve 0 out of 5 buttholes on this story.
Am I the butthole for no longer allowing my sister to work in my daycare after what she
did?
Hi, I'm a 32 year old widow.
I've been a widow for 3 years.
I've struggled a lot financially.
I didn't get help from my family because they claimed they can't help me, so I decided
to start a home daycare.
It's been open for 7 months now. My friend was able to get me more clients
via Facebook. Thank goodness my business is growing and I've made quite a lot of
friends who are moms and I've also established a good reputation since my
daycare has been recommended. My sister, who's 26, is unemployed. She couldn't
find a job and she has to pay rent for her and her boyfriend. My parents
suggested that I let her come work with me in my daycare and I accept it since she has some experience.
She got along with the other workers and things were going fine.
Until she came to me asking about a specific child that comes to our daycare.
He's for and very well behaved for his age.
I was confused after she complained about him.
She said that she saw his dad come to pick up the child, and she didn't feel comfortable
because he's a cop, and my sister had an unpleasant incident with the police.
She's still in therapy because of that incident, and she struggles a lot with it.
She wanted me to let the child go for my daycare and tell the parent to look for another daycare.
The cop usually arrives at 3pm to pick up the kid.
From what I understand, the guy's wife is sick.
I turned my sister down.
I have no good reason to let the child go.
My sister refused to drop it and started being mean to the dad.
It was unprofessional, lover.
I told her she either has to be respectful or I won't have her work with me anymore.
Two days ago, my sister sent an email to the dad telling him that we won't be welcoming
as kid of the daycare anymore.
He came to talk to me and I was livid when I saw the email.
The cop asked why as kid was kicked out and he said that his kid went into state because
he's made friends with some other kids.
He talked about not being able to find a daycare closer than ours.
I lashed out at my sister and told her she's no longer able to work at my daycare because
of her behavior.
We got into an argument and she left after saying that I was being unsupportive and inconsiderate.
My parents called me saying that I shouldn't have kicked my sister out and now I'm causing
her to lose her apartment.
They argue that I have no regard for my sister's trauma and I should have let the child go
and support her because she's my sister.
Everyone shamed me and claimed that I have messed up priorities.
I do feel that I was in the wrong for letting her struggle without a job, but I have no
reason to let go of that child also.
OP, not the butthole here, I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes. Your sister can't
just come into your business and you'd laterally make decisions about who can and can't be
a client there. That's your decision, not hers.
You're doing your sister a favor
and she repays that favor by undermining you? Nah, she gets three out of five buttholes
on that one. Am I the butthole for making my sonny leftovers when everyone else had his
favorite meal? I'm a 34 year old male and my wife and I have two kids, Adam, who's 12
and Jasmine, who's 8. My wife and I both came from cultures where rich people wasted a ton of food while there
were people starving just around the corner.
So we're very conscious about food waste.
Also, I've seen relatives with kids who were extremely picky eaters and it wasn't something
I wanted to deal with.
So when Adam was old enough to start being fussy about his food, we introduced a new
rule.
If you don't finish your dinner, it's gonna be your breakfast the next day.
This was mainly to get him to finish his vegetables.
When he was old enough, he started picking his own serving sizes so we weren't forcing
him to eat extra.
My wife and I are both good cooks, so he enjoys and finishes most of his meals promptly.
We kinda forgot about the rule for a while until Jasmine started becoming fussy recently,
so we introduced it again.
To make it fair, Adam is also doing it.
Last night, he over served himself and couldn't finish a lot of his food.
This morning, my wife's family came over for breakfast.
My wife wanted to treat them, so she made her special French toast and homemade croissants.
This is Adam's favorite meal, what you got excited for.
But when we sat down for breakfast, he was shocked to find a plate full of leftovers
waiting for him.
His face caught gloomy and he ate in silence.
He was too full by the indeed any of the breakfast.
After breakfast, her parents berated us for being cruel and torturing him.
We defended ourselves by saying that it would be unfair on Jasmine if her brother gets to
avoid his leftovers, but she never does.
Now I think that I could have been the butthole because he's been really good about eating
his food recently.
Also, we could have just made him finish it for lunch, so read it, am I the butthole?
Yeah, OP, I'll definitely say that you're the butthole here.
In your defense though, you're not going to get like a major butthole rating. That being said, you're like a butthole in multiple
different categories. So first of all, it was unreasonable to make him stick by this rule
because this was a special occasion. This wasn't just some normal breakfast, this was a special
family get together, and you basically punished him in front of the whole family. That was really
excessive. Also, you're saying that Adam has to the whole family? That was really excessive.
Also, you're saying that Adam has to follow the rule
to be fair to Jasmine.
Well, the thing is, Adam is 12 and Jasmine is four.
So logically speaking, Adam's already had to endure
this rule for like four years now.
You said yourself that you stopped
from limiting the rule for Adam
because he'd been so much better by eating recently.
So basically, Adam has been showing good behavior, but he made one really silly mistake.
I mean, it's not even like he was being a picky eater, he accidentally over-served himself,
and then just couldn't finish everything on his plate. So, Adam's being a good kid,
and he makes a dumb mistake, and your response is to punish him? Why? It kind of sounds like
you're trying to be fair to Jasmine at the expense
of being unfair to Adam. On top of all that, there's the added embarrassment of you punishing
him in front of his grandparents. OP, you should have just given him the leftover's
eat during lunch. Poor Adam gets zero out of five buttholes. OP, I'm giving you, let's
say, 1.5 out of five buttholes. Also, OP, word of advice, try not to use food as a form of punishment because that's how
kids develop eating disorders.
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Am I the butthofer telling my wife
that she asked to be with my graduation an hour before
she needed to because she's always late for things?
I'm a 27-year-old guy, and I've been with my 27-year-old wife for 8 years.
For 5 of those years, I was in the military, and I developed the habit of being early for
everything.
It's a huge pet peeve of mine if people are late for things when they could have been
on time.
If something happens out of your control in your late, then I totally understand.
My wife is a type of person who's always late.
Throughout our relationship, she's made us late for events of person who's always late. Throughout our relationship,
she's made us late for events and it's been embarrassing. One of the worst incidents
was when I was home on leave. We were planning on meeting my mom for breakfast who I hadn't
seen in two years at 9 a.m. I told my wife the day before that I want to leave our place
at 8.30 so we could get there at 8.50. We both wake up at 7am and I'm ready at 8am.
At that point, she hasn't even started to get ready. I remind her multiple times that
we need to leave by 8.30 but she just kept saying, we have time and I'll be fast. She
didn't start getting ready until 8.30. Long story short, we were an hour late and we
lost our reservation because of it.
I was pissed, but I kept it to myself until we got home.
I told her that I hated that she always made us late and it could be embarrassing sometimes.
She apologized and said that she would work on it, but it never got any better.
If anything, she would get short with me if I mentioned the time.
Fast four or three years ago, I was graduating the police academy.
The graduation was set to begin at 10 a.m and people could start showing up at 9.15. short with me if I mentioned the time. Fast four or three years and I was graduating the police academy.
The graduation was set to begin at 10 a.m.
and people could start showing up at 9.15.
Well, knowing my wife and not wanting her to walk in late,
I told her the graduation started at 9.15
and she had to be there at 8.30 to find parking.
Well, sure enough, I see her driving in at 9.15.
Of course, I was a little pissed
but glad that my plan worked.
The rest of the graduation went as planned, and I was happy.
Afterwards, a group of us in our spouses went on to celebrate.
At one point, my wife mentions that she was lucky the ceremony got pushed back, or she
was going to be late.
My friends were confused, and told her that they saw her car, and that she showed up right
on time.
My wife then asked what time the ceremony was supposed to start.
They all said 10am. At that point, my wife just stared at me and I knew she was pissed.
When we got home, my wife blew up on me. She said that she was pissed that I lied to
her and didn't understand why I did what I did. I told her that I knew that she would
be late, so I told her a slightly earlier time to be safe. She said that she was hurt and felt that I manipulated her. This is where I might be the butthole. I said,
how do you think I feel? I told you that graduation started at 9.15 and you were still late.
You know how hard I worked to get through Academy and you couldn't even be on time for
this one occasion. She got quiet and just said that she's going to bed. She's barely spoken
to me over the last couple of days and I don't know if I was too harsh. So am I the
butthole?
OP, your wife is systematically rooting disrespectful to you and everyone else that she has appointments
with. If I had been deployed on military duty and I came back to America to my mom who
I hadn't seen in 2 years.
If my wife was running late, I'd just leave without her.
O.P., you get 0 out of 5 buttholes.
Your wife gets 2 out of 5 buttholes.
Am I the butthole for not wanting to leave my own apartment?
I'm a 28 year old guy and I've been friends with my roommate, a 25 year old female, ever
since we were babies.
Our families were
neighbors and we grew up together. She's like a little sister to me and she always has been.
After she graduated college, she moved to the same city I currently work in, and since she couldn't
find an apartment close enough to where she worked, I told her she could live with me. Weed
chair bills and become roommates. We've never really had problems or fights because we've known
each other for so long. However, recently,
things have taken a strange turn. She got involved with someone from her work. This guy seemed to be
a nice guy. I'd only ever spoken to him three times because they usually kept her room,
but he was really friendly and honestly, I was happy to found someone who seemed that nice.
After a few months into the relationship, she sent me a text saying that she had to talk
to me.
She told me that, while she enjoyed living with me, her boyfriend was starting to get jealous
of his woman living with another man.
At first I raised an eyebrow, but I thought our living situation wasn't that uncommon.
So I was like, oh, it's fine.
Just let me know when you plan on leaving.
Hope you find a good place. However, apparently I was wrong.
She told me that she wasn't leaving.
She said that it was impossible to find somewhere closer
to her work and that she was hoping that I would let her
take the apartment instead since my work
wasn't close and all that.
The thing is, I really love my apartment.
It's close to the gym, the grocery store,
to pretty much everything. I'm not gonna leave my apartment because It's close to the gym, the grocery store, to pretty much everything.
I'm not gonna leave my apartment because of something this stupid, and I told her flat out that
this wasn't gonna happen. She got visibly upset, and started to rant about me being an egotistical
butthole. That I didn't have empathy to put myself in her shoes. This happened a few days ago,
and she shed herself in her room only leaving to go to work
or to pick up her boyfriend who became really unfriendly to me after that.
Now a lot of times I can be a butthole, but I don't think this was one of those times.
So I thought I would ask for Reddit's verdict.
Am I really such a butthole?
Down in the comments, Meet Cube says what I was thinking.
Let me get this straight.
You've known her for over two decades.
You welcome her into your home, and now she expects you to leave so she can live with her jealous
boyfriend that she's just gotten on with. Not the butthole, bro. She is. Big time.
Look at how she treats someone who's like a sibling. Yeah, I agree, OP,
really weird position from this girl. When you get right down to it,
what she's really saying is that you need to move out because her commute is too important.
If she wants a new apartment, she can pack up her entitlement and leave.
I will say though that even though this is some pretty awful behavior from your friend,
you've known her for two decades, so I think you should probably give her the benefit of the doubt.
Maybe her jealous boyfriend is dripping poison in her ear and making her think this way.
Considering how close you two are, I think it's probably worth trying to work out instead
of letting a petty squalbo ruin your relationship.
Hopefully your friend can see the light, especially if you show her this red red with every
single person here backing you up and calling her the butthole. You get
0 out of 5 buttholes, she gets 2 out of 5 buttholes. That was our slash of my the butthole,
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