rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole My Hubby Skipped My Son's Birth to Watch Football

Episode Date: October 10, 2021

r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP is so pregnant that she could go into labor at any moment. Despite this, her husband insists on hanging out with his buddies every night to watch sports games. O...P goes into labor, and her husband refuses to come take her to the hospital because the game isn't over yet. He even lies to her and tells her that he's on the way, when in reality he was just hanging with his friends, watching the game. OP eventually had to call another relative to take her to the hospital. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to R-Slashe, a podcast where I read the best post from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slashe Am I the Butthole, where R-Slashe gets angry. Am I the Butthole for telling my in-laws exactly where my husband was when I was in labor? I gave birth to my son 10 weeks ago. I went through a really exhausting period as I neared my due date. I was experiencing discomfort and I went in my husband by my side when I went into labor, but he would go out every night to hang out at his friends place and watch football games. I suggested that he watch the games at home just in case, but he was having none
Starting point is 00:00:35 of that and said that he had to attend game night at his brother and friends place along with his buddies. He said they had certain, how do I describe it? Rituals when watching a game, and he can't enjoy doing it at home or anywhere else. The night of our son's birth, my water broke while my husband was at his buddies place watching a game. I called him and told him to come home and take me to the hospital, and he said he was coming, but he didn't. I ended up calling my sister who lives nearby and she took me to the hospital. My husband showed up two hours later after he kept calling, asking if I was still in labor and that he was almost done watching the game.
Starting point is 00:01:13 He was able to make it on time for our son's birth. But I was furious with him, mad and disappointed. He apologized profusely and he's been working on regaining my trust and respect for him after what he's done. He's otherwise very supportive and involved in our son's care. Last night I was at my in-laws house for dinner and we were talking about my son's birth date. My husband suddenly started recalling what happened that night and basically started lying about driving me to the hospital, waiting around and feeling stressed out and standing on his feet for so long without food or even water. I was confused and I said no, none of this
Starting point is 00:01:51 was true, none of that happened. In fact, he was watching a game when I went into labor and I wanted him to drive me to the hospital, but he didn't show up until two hours later. My mother-in-law, who takes no garbage from anybody and to everyone fears, lost it on my husband. She was yelling at him asking if this was true, and he just kept quiet. She started berating him left and right, telling him to sit down and shut up when he tried to stand up to argue. Everyone was laughing at how she treated him like he was basically a little boy in trouble.
Starting point is 00:02:24 She kept saying, Shame, shame, shame on you! This is not how I raise my children to treat their wives. Jordan, you're a disgrace, and I'm disappointed because of what I've heard about you. He literally swallowed every bit of his mother's berating, and didn't say anything until he got home, where he went nuts saying that I made him look neglectful like a bad husband and father by telling the family about where he was. And he said that I shouldn't have said anything. I asked, oh, but it is okay for you to lie and play hero in front of your parents. He said that I just caused a rift between him and his family, and he asked if I was happy
Starting point is 00:03:01 now. Am I the butthole? Should I have not said anything? O.P. O.P. I, I, okay. I've been mad. I've been angry reading this entire post. The, just, ugh. This guy is such a f***ing asshole.
Starting point is 00:03:19 Oh my God. On top of just completely not being there in your time. Okay, I gotta break this down, you guys, I gotta break this down. Let's start with the really obvious one. To him, watching a football game is more important than watching the birth of his own son. On top of that, he refused to leave the football game while lying to his wife that he was on the way, such that she had to rely on her sister to
Starting point is 00:03:45 get her to the hospital. Then, oh, let's not forget, there's a pandemic going on. So even if everyone here is vaccinated, I mean maybe they are, maybe they're not. Getting COVID while you're vaccinated from what I understand is still an absolutely miserable experience. So, let's suppose this guy goes to his football game, his oh so important football game. Gets COVID, brings it back home, gives it to his wife, and then his wife has COVID during birth.
Starting point is 00:04:15 I mean, I've always heard that giving birth is a pretty miserable experience, but I would have to assume that one way to make it extra miserable is to have COVID while you're also giving birth. And the thing that pisses me off the most is his just completely ignorant, selfish, cruel hypocrisy. The line that OP wrote, she said, I made him look neglectful, and like a bad husband and father by telling the family, well yeah, you are neglectful, you literally
Starting point is 00:04:45 neglected your wife while she needed you the most in her life that she's probably ever needed you. And you are a bad husband and father because you almost missed the birth of your own son. And he's upset because you caused a rift between him and his family, but what about what he did causing a rift between him and his own son? I'm going to go back up and read a line in the first paragraph. He said they had certain, how do I describe it? Rituals when watching a game and he can't enjoy doing it at home or anywhere else.
Starting point is 00:05:14 Well, dude, women everywhere have had a certain, hmm, how do I describe it? Ritual, I guess you could say, where they served divorce papers to their husbands for being sh**t humans, awful parents, and did be dads. Man, geez, I'm like, I'm getting like, honestly a little bit teary and emotional reading this because the image, geez, okay, well this is hitting me hard, alright, the image of my daughter being bored is like, like, okay, the image of my daughter being born is seared into my brain. I will never forget the image. She was laying on like a table after the doctor, you know, pulled her out of my wife
Starting point is 00:06:00 and she was crying and she actually reached out towards me in my direction. I was her first act was reaching out towards me and my wife and like to miss that but to miss that so I can catch a football game. What are you out of your mind? Are you insane? In 20 years, is he going to remember that football game? Because in 20 years, I'm gonna remember the birth of my of my daughter. I'm gonna remember being there for my wife. Opie, honestly, honestly. This is one of the biggest red flags I've ever seen. This is disgusting behavior. It's selfish, cruel, utterly clueless, bad husband, bad father, bad human being. I can't believe this guy really honestly prioritized a football game over his own family,
Starting point is 00:06:51 his wife, his son, and the time they needed him more than any time they've ever needed you, more than any time that you've ever needed them in probably your entire lives, unless you save you from a burning building at some point in your life which I doubt. Opie, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes. This guy gets a rock solid 5 out of 5 buttholes. I am personally glad that his mom absolutely ripped him to shreds because he deserves it. I sincerely hope that a wedge has been driven in between him and his family and I hope they look down on him and they don't respect him anymore because what he did isn't worthy of respect. If my mom found out, if my mom found out that I missed the birth
Starting point is 00:07:32 of my own daughter because I was playing a video game. I mean, I don't watch sports, but I do play video games. So if she found out that I was playing some game, like, hey, the game's almost over, I can't take you to the hospital yet. So going without me, she would absolutely rip my ass to shreds no doubt about it She would weep in front of me. She would weep and to be honest
Starting point is 00:07:54 I would deserve it because it's it's a disgusting. It's disgusting behavior man. I am Okay, okay Let's calm down. This guy's a butthole. He's a major butthole. He's a 5 out of 5 butthole. But we're gonna move on past this story as a group. Ah, okay. We got through it guys. We got through this story.
Starting point is 00:08:15 OP, I sincerely hope you filed divorce papers because in my opinion, personally, I think this is unforgivable. This is just hugely red flag behavior and I wouldn't want that in my life. So I'm sorry to say this, but you got a really, really sh**t husband. You just do. Am I the butthole for telling my dad that he's an effing man child for refusing to deal with my sister's first period? I'm 20 years old and my parents are divorced.
Starting point is 00:08:42 My mom, who's 43, lives about 2 hours away from my dad, who's 46, his fiance, who's 26, and my sister, who's 11. This weekend, I visited home and stayed with my dad and sister. I got home at around 7 a.m. to see my dad off to work and my sister off to school. At around noon, I wake up to a phone call from my mom, telling me I need to go pick up my sister from school. I ask her what's going on, and she tells me that my sister started her period and left her go-bag at her place. I say sure, and I drive down to her school. On the way there, I get a call from my dad, and he tells me not to worry about it, just go home. He tells me that his fiance will take care of it after she gets off work. I tell my dad that I'm not busy right now, so I can go get her. He tells me that I'm a man, and I don't't need to handle it and I should let a woman handle a woman's
Starting point is 00:09:30 problem. I'm kinda dumbfounded, but hey, if his fiance is on her way over then I can get back to sleep for the rest of the day. I ask how long it'll be until his fiance gets there so I can keep my mom in the loop and he says these exact words. She gets off at 3. The school will give her some new pants for the time being. Which is crazy, right? I tell him that's ridiculous and I'm going to pick my sister up. My father literally tells me no and tells me to turn around. I say that I'm going to get my sister and I hang up before he argues. I go pick up my sister and I ask her if she has any feminine products at home and she says no. So I take her to the store to buy some products of different
Starting point is 00:10:11 flows and I got her some of the foods my girlfriend once when she's on the rack. We get home, I tell her to wake me up if she needs anything and I go back to sleep. A few hours later I wake up to bang on the door and it's my dad yelling at me for defying him and taking care of my sister. He then tells me that it's disgusting that I bought her stuff and that I'm her brother and I shouldn't be involved in her sexual health. I tell my father that he's being ridiculous. He told me that I need to never do stuff like this again.
Starting point is 00:10:40 I told my father that he's acting like an effing man child. My dad goes off and he kicks me out of the house. So I pack up my stuff and go to my mom's where she tells me that I shouldn't have said what I said even if it was true. Even my girlfriend told me that I overreacted and I shouldn't have soared at my dad. Am I the butthole? OP, your father went your sister to just sit around in school in her own blood, surrounded by her peers, her teachers for hours and hours and hours, just being embarrassed and uncomfortable
Starting point is 00:11:13 because what, your dad's just a sexist I guess? And like, he's acting like you are stripping her down and taking a shower with her, but all you did was drive to school, pick her up, go to the grocery store, buy some stuff, and then go home. How is any of that inappropriate? OP, your dad has this really like weird old school backward sexist mentality that just feels so out of place in 2021. He's like, when the moon blood comes, men and women must not touch. Cudies are attracted to the moon blood and they infest the woman. So if woman touched man, Cudies transfer to man and then man has Cudies.
Starting point is 00:11:54 Anyways, OPM, I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes. All you're doing was helping out your sister. I'm giving your dad two out of five buttholes for being a dumb sexist. Am I the butthole for how I responded after my husband asked why I'm being so unladylike in front of my whole family? To begin with, I'd like to mention that my husband, who's 39, is the breadwinner in our family, while I'm a stay-at-home mom taking care of our home in three kids, who are 5 years old, 3 years old, and 6 months old.
Starting point is 00:12:21 Lately, we've been having a few arguments with him complaining about me not taking care of myself or my looks and being always busy with chores and whatnot. We got invited to my parents' house last night. Once we sat down for dinner, my mom, sister, and I started talking about preparations for my sister's wedding. My sister talked about her hair, makeup, dress, etc. My husband kept giving me looks and raising his eyebrow whenever the words haircut or makeup or new dress got brought up.
Starting point is 00:12:48 He decided to join in the conversation and started openly criticizing my current look and how unlady like I've become recently, especially after our third child was born. He went on commenting on how much he liked me to change my hair color, get my nails done or buy new nice dresses to wear like other wives do for once. I was stunned with my mouth wide open and so were my parents. My brother-in-law was laughing secretly, and my sister looked me up and down in a poor sister type of way.
Starting point is 00:13:19 My husband didn't stop at that and ranted about how I should start taking care of us and being more energetic, positive, outgoing, sexy, and so on. Then he looked at me and asked me why I've become so unlady like all of a sudden. And he just kept looking at me in a whatever happened to you, what changed type of way? I was mad. I said, behind every unlady-like miserable woman, there's a trashy negative butthole man. And I pointed out that what changed is him not pulling his weight in child care, delaying and making excuses about household chores while he posts on Facebook about what an amazing job he does to provide for us. I cook, clean, wash, do laundry, get up to feed the baby, change the baby, give them
Starting point is 00:14:06 baths, and so on. He reminded me that I'm the stay-at-home parent, and he's the moneymaker. I've pointed out that there are lots of dads who are moneymakers, but they still do their parts as husbands and parents. He was stunned and dumbfounded, and everyone was looking at him in an awkward and embarrassing way. He got quiet the rest of the visit, just looking down and avoiding eye contact with everyone in the room. He blew up at me in the car, asking what the hell possessed me to go off on him
Starting point is 00:14:34 like that in front of his in-laws who now have a very false and misleading impression of him. He said that no matter what happens, I should never share our private issues with family. I reminded him of who brought it up first, and he called me petty for making a scene to get back at him, only for giving me some innocent advice. He's soaking right now. Did I go too far? Opie, I don't understand why your husband thinks that your parents and family have an incorrect view of him now, because based on what you're describing here, it sounds like a pretty accurate description, honestly. Your husband's a selfish, sexist douchebag,
Starting point is 00:15:09 who thinks that at your job as a woman, to take care of the kids, take care of the house, and look like a gorgeous supermodel while you're doing it. And then on top of the sexism and the lack of respect, he's just a total hypocrite. If it's so important not to share private, family details in public, then why is he criticizing you for your appearance and your unlady-like behavior? Okay, so I'm married
Starting point is 00:15:32 to my wife, and we have a new daughter that was born this year, and I'm in a really, really fortunate position where because of this YouTube channel and my podcast, I'm able to support both me and my wife, so she's able to stay home, take care of the kid and be a stay at home mom, which I'm really, really happy to provide for her because that's the life that she prefers. So while I'm down in the basement, recording this video that you're listening to right now, she's upstairs taking care of the baby, but at the end of the day, I don't go upstairs, prop my feet up, and then just act like my contribution to the family has ended. Because yeah, it is my job to make money,
Starting point is 00:16:10 and while I'm making money, my wife is doing her side of the work as well. She's taking care of the baby. But I still got to be a partner to my wife. I still have to be a father, and that doesn't mean I just do nothing from 5pm until I go to sleep every day. That's selfish, That's stupid. It doesn't even make any sense. If your husband comes home from work and then just post on Facebook about how awesome he is while you take care of the kids, then he's not being a good father. Point
Starting point is 00:16:35 blank. I mean sure he's providing for them, but so kids don't just need money. They also need love, guidance, attention, care. you need to show interest in them. And your husband seems to have the attitude that the second he gets off from work, his responsibility is completely over. But you, OP, because you're a woman, your responsibility apparently never ends. OP, I'm giving your husband three out of five buttholes for being a sexist, hypocritical douchebag. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes because all you did was defend yourself. That was our Sasha Mitha butthole, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put on your Reddit podcast
Starting point is 00:17:15 episodes every single day.

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