rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole My Spouse Wants Me To Throw Away My Anime Pillow, But I REFUSE!

Episode Date: December 1, 2020

r/AmITheA**hole In today's story, OP and her husband use a body pillow named DMZ-chan to keep the peace in the bedroom at night when they sleep. When her mother-in-law sees the body pillow, OP's husband immediately starts pressuring OP to get rid of the body pillow, but OP refuses! The body pillow saved their marriage! How could she betray DMZ-chan like that? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Metrolinx and cross-links are reminding everyone to be careful as Eglinton Cross-town LRT train testing is in progress. Please be alert as trains can pass at any time on the tracks. Remember to follow all traffic signals. Be careful along our tracks and only make left turns where it's safe to do so. Be alert, be aware and stay safe. Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where we'd the best post from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash and My The Butthole, where OP's mother-in-law thinks that she's in a three-way relationship with an anime-bodied pillow. Am I the butthole for not wanting to help

my classmate after she outed my husband? My husband to Adam is transgender and takes testosterone. He orders it online to arrive at a pharmacy. Last year I decided to go back to school to get my degree. I'm a 28 year old female and there's a pharmacy on campus. So we agreed that he'd get his medship there and I'd pick them up from now on. Earlier this year I picked up Adam's gel. My classmate, Jess, saw me leave with a medication bag and asked if I was okay and I said the medicine was for Adam. She asked if he was okay, and I said that he was. She asked me what I got in him, and I found this to be more than a little invasive, so I said it was private. After a few seconds, she asked me why I was getting

him testosterone, which he'd manage to read off the label on the bag. I couldn't think of an excuse, so I just told her the truth. My husband is trans, he's trying to be discreet about it. Please don't tell anyone. She agreed and off she went. Within a few hours, everyone knew, and I was on the receiving end of questions from several classmates about how my husband and I passionately hug and various other disgusting advances. They all said that just told them. At the end of the day, Adam picked me up and people were ogling us, and he knew that they knew even before I said anything, and he was crushed. Skip a hit eight months to present day, Jess didn't caught the illness that I don't know if I'm allowed to name. She missed basically the whole first month of classes, and will

probably miss future ones too. I make recordings of the lectures that I'm willing to share with anyone who asks. Just once my recordings. She asked me for the recordings privately 6 separate times in the span of 3 days, and the first 5 times I said I'd let her know. The 6 was the final straw for me, and I told her to piss off. Last night she posted in the class chat saying, does anyone have their recordings? Oh, he told me to piss off when I asked for hers. There were a few more exchanges, and the conclusion is that I have the only recordings, and I'm

being a b-word for not sharing with Jess. I've muted the chat. My point of view is that she outed Adam, and I don't want to help her at all. Everyone else's point of view is that she needs my help. She's in extremely sucky circumstances, and this would be the right thing to do. Plus, her outing him had no repercussions beyond people in my class knowing. While me not helping her could lead to her failing the next round of assignments, am I the butthole for not helping her? So I think we can all agree that Jess is a major butthole here who gets 4 out of 5 buttholes. Who outs people in 2020? But I've got to say OP, you also deserve

a butthole rating here. OP, if your husband doesn't want to be outed, then why are you telling nosy, busy bodies his business? If some random acquaintance tried to pry into my wife's private medical history, I'd say it's none of your f***ing business. So for that OP, I have to give you 2 out of 5 buttholes for not respecting your husband's privacy. Your husband is clearly the victim here and gets 0 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for ruining my friend's birthday party by taking back the cake that I baked for her?

My friend is quirky. She was never diagnosed with anything, but she's very clueless sometimes. I've had to spell things out for her a lot. A few months back, she borrowed a dress of mine and I really love that dress. There isn't any sentimental value, but I got it when we were on vacation a few years ago. She also loved the dress, and one day just transferred the money to my account and told me that she was keeping the dress. I spoke to her, but she just told me that doesn't matter since she paid me. Her birthday was a week ago and her mom asked me to bake a big cake for her.

I usually sell cakes cheap, a little more than the ingredient costs. On her birthday, I went over to her house with the cake 15 minutes before the party was due to start and then decided to talk to her mother. Like I said, my friend is really clueless sometimes and I was hoping her mom would speak to her and get my dress back. I was very shocked when she also said that as long as I was paid it doesn't matter. She told me to just move on as it was just a dress and that my friend really liked it. She told me that as long as the dress was paid for what am I complaining about. I got really pissed off, pulled out the amount of cash that she paid me, put it on the table,

picked up my cake, and left. She got mad and started yelling at me that I was ruining the party. I kept walking back to my house. She kept telling me to give back the cake and that I couldn't take it back just because I wanted to be petty. I just asked what she was complaining about since I paid back the money. My friend ended up having a cakeless 16th birthday party because of this. Am I the butthole here?

Oh, Opie, you are definitely a petty butthole here, but it was also completely justified. I don't know why she was getting so upset. I mean, you paid for the cake, so according to her own rules, that makes it yours. Opie, I'm giving you, let's say, 0.5 out of 5 buttholes and I'm giving your friend 2 out of 5 buttholes. I'm also gonna give your friend's mom 3 out of 5 buttholes because she's literally raising her child wrong. Am I the butthole for not wanting to get rid of the enemy body pillow that saved my marriage? My husband and I are best friends during the day, the love of my life. It's at night when I have an issue. I'm a blanket

sealer. I want you ink them so hard that poor hubby flipped a full 180. Hubby, for his part, is a thrasher. Bruce Lee would be jealous of the moves that he pulls off while unconscious. It's a constant war between us when we fall asleep. And both of us wake up sore and exhausted. It was starting to affect our relationship. Neither of us wanted to move to a separate bid because we liked spending our nights together, but it seemed like an inevitability. We were both crabby every morning and we started fighting as soon as we got up. It sucked, but neither of us wanted to concede defeat and move to the other bid.

Quick background, I was a huge nerd as a teenager. Full on Otaku. Go ahead, cringe, I was a huge nerd as a teenager. Fulano Taco. Go ahead, cringe, I do. One night as a joke, I brought down an old anime body pillow from the attic, I know cringe, and plopped it down between my husband and I. Claim me it to be our demilitarized zone. Hubby also thought it was hilarious,

and we named her DMZ Chan. She stayed there the whole night. It was a game changer. DMZ Chan protected me from my husband's R.E.M. induced rampages, and she's just heavy enough that I can't yank the blankets at full speed. DMZ Chan is now a beloved part of our nightly routine. We both thought it was the funniest thing, but she legitimately helped us solve the only real issue in our marriage.

One day, my mother-in-law stopped by to pick something up. She got up to use the restroom and passed by our open bedroom door. You can guess what she saw. DMZ Chan, propped up in the middle of our bid, her giant, soulful anime eyes looking right back at my mother-in-law. When she got back, she quickly grabbed her stuff and left, and my hubby and I were both confused. She later mentioned DMZ-Chan to hubby while they were on the phone, and had absolutely mortified him. As far as I know, my mother-in-law now thinks that we're deviants in a three-way relationship with a body pillow. My hubby was too embarrassed to explain, and now he wants to put DMZ-Chan back in the attic. I was upset! I told him I didn't want to go back to

boxing each other at night and that DMZ Chan helped us so much in that. He agreed, but suggested that we get a normal, plain body pillowcase to replace her. I felt like there was no need to spend money on something that we already have. And if it really was that big of an issue, then we can put her in the closet when we have company over. My hubby is firm that she has to go. issue, then we can put her in the closet when we have company over. My hubby is firm that she has to go. Permanently. I know he's embarrassed, but I feel we shouldn't have to compromise our inside jokes to appease other people.

Am I the butthole? Opie, I think there comes a point in everyone's life when they have to sit down their significant other and say, no, I am NOT getting rid of my anime body pillow. Or in some cases, my anime body pillows. My wife and I have a fight every night about my life size of Chaco body pillow, but sometimes you just have to put your foot down. Now streaming on Paramount Plus.

Hey baby, I hear the blues and calling tall salads and scrambled eggs. Y'all know how this goes. And maybe I seem a bit confused. Yeah, maybe. But I got you picked. Ha, ha, ha. But I don't know what to do with those tall salads and scrambled eggs.

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I'm introverted, artistic, and would rather cosplay than play sports. When I was 14, my great grandmother moved in with us and she taught me how to crochet. I loved it, but my brother's gym and tim, a both 27 years old, used to tease me constantly for it when she wasn't around. And whenever I would complain, my dad told me that life's full of people who are going to call me names, and that I need to toughen up. I honestly think that he was just disappointed that I wasn't an extroverted jock like him and his other sons.

And he felt like he could just pressure me into becoming more like him. When my great-grandmother died, she didn't have much, but she specifically left me her crochet hooks and I was very touched. She also left my cousin unfinished baby socks that she was crocheting for my cousin's baby and I could tell my cousin was disappointed. We kind of had this tradition of our great-grandmother making thing for our coming babies. I offered to finish what our great-grandmother had started using her hooks and my cousin was thrilled at the gesture. After that,

I kinda inherited the position of crocheting things for any new babies in the family and I rather enjoyed it because it felt like I was carrying on a legacy. Although that didn't stop my immediate family from making jokes and calling me names. Despite the constant attacks against my sexuality, Jim, ironically, came out as gay, and has since apologized for his past treatment of me, so we're on good terms, but Tim is still a jerk to me. When I went to college, I went low contact with Tim and my father and would just tolerate them at family events. Last week, Tim announced that Hina's girlfriend Tina were engaged and expecting their first

child over social media, and everyone was thrilled. During a Zoom meeting with the family, Tina said that she would love a matching blanket, little hat, and shoes for the baby from me. And I asked her to send me a copy for a registry for baby clothes. Tim laughed and said that everyone knows it is tradition that I make the items. I told him flat out that he doesn't get to make fun of my skills as a crochet ear and then expect free labor from me. My dad said that I was being rude and needed to apologize. I counter that if Tim was hurt by my refusal to crochet for him, then he should just toughen up and get over it and then I left the call.

Since then, I've been getting text messages from my parents and Tim saying that I'm being petty and a jerk to teen in the baby. But I haven't responded. Am I the butthole for refusing to crochet something for my brother's baby after years of teasing? Yeah, I'm with you, OP. They can stop whining and toughen up. They can dish it out just fine, but when they're on the receiving end, oh, it's important that we all be polite to each other.

Give me a break. OP, you get zero out of five buttholes. Tim and your dad each get three out of five buttholes, and your other brother gets 2 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for taking back my nephew's Christmas present and giving it to my son? My sister and I have always had a strange relationship. I usually just let things go and try to keep the peace. We both have sons who are around the same age. My nephew is 13 and my son just turned 11.

For my son's birthday, I bought him a new gaming system that he's been wanting. He was absolutely thrilled and he plays non-stop. My sister is bad with money. I usually have to lend her money for bills and stuff for my nephew. I know my nephew doesn't always get the best Christmas gifts, so this year I went a little crazy and I purchased the same gaming system for him for Christmas. I already had it ready and wrapped under my tree. Yesterday my sister's family came to visit. My son asked me if they could go play video games. I said yes and reminded them to be careful. About 30 minutes

later, my son comes running to me crying. I asked him what was wrong and he led me down the front hall. When we got to the stairs, I see the new gaming system smashed on the floor. Someone had thrown it from the upstairs and it was now smashed to pieces. I asked my son what happened and he sobbed and pointed at his cousin. I asked my nephew if he did this and he started to laugh. He said that it was a stupid baby toy and that he saw people break them online. My sister came in and I told her what happened. I explained that this was an expensive system and there are some needs to be disciplined for

what he did. I told her I wanted her to pay for what her son broke. She laughed and said no. She says that I shouldn't have let them play unsupervised. That it was all my fault and that I'm a bad parent. She said that my son will get over and it wasn't important. Seeing my son sitting on the ground next to his broken system, trying to put the pieces back together tore my heart out.

I walked over to the Christmas tree and grabbed the system that was meant for my nephew. I pulled the get-wrap off and gave it to my son and told him to go upstairs and set it up. My sister asked me why I was making such a big deal when I had another one already. I then laughed and told her that was her son's Christmas gift. That since it wasn't important and it was a stupid baby toy, then they obviously wouldn't miss it. I then told them to leave. My nephew realized what happened and began to cry that my son had stole a system. I said, nope, your system was the one that you smashed. My sister was

livid and told me that I'll never see them again. I just said okay and slammed the door. Other family members have been calling me non-stop, saying that I'm a butthole and that I ruined my nephew's Christmas. I don't think so though. My nephew is 13, he's not a stupid kid and he knew what he was doing. I don't care that it was over jealousy, he's old enough to know better. My sister wasn't going to make the situation right, so I just did what I had to do. They all think that I should buy another system form, but I don't have that kind of money. I'm starting to feel bad about this, and I'm wondering, am I

the butthole? OP, you did absolutely nothing wrong here. You didn't ruin your nephews Christmas, your sister and your nephew ruined their own Christmas. Your nephews sounds like an entitled little jerk, and I hope he learns a lesson from this, but I'd be really surprised if he does. Opie, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes, I'm giving your nephew 3 out of 5 buttholes, and I'm giving your sister 4 out of 5 buttholes. I can't believe that she didn't offer to replace your son's system.

You break it, you buy it. Am I the butthole for not liking how my girlfriend dresses for work? So I'm a 43 year old male and I don't think I'm in the wrong here. But my mother is very angry at me and my best friend said that I was a horrible person for saying what I did. And I'd be lucky if my girlfriend didn't put me out with the garbage since I decided I wanted to act like trash. My 34 year old girlfriend is a preschool teacher, and for some reason

I can't explain, she dresses like Mrs. Frizzle, like a dress with a pattern of whatever they're studying. She makes a lot of them herself, now including matching masks. The kids love it, and the parents seem to think that it's great. I don't like the amount of attention she gets, honestly. I'd prefer if she came home and changed before running in the errands. On Friday, my girlfriend helped my mom with something after work, and she was still wearing her weird dress. I've told her before that I don't like it when she dresses that way, but she tells me that I don't have to like it.

But I have no right to tell her how to dress. I was upset that she went out like that with my mother, and told her that my mom said that she was embarrassed, and to ask that she please not dress like that again if they're going out. I wasn't expecting her to call my mom and apologize. When my mom asked what she meant, she told her what I said. My mom was furious. She explained that she doesn't have a problem with how my girlfriend dresses and thinks that it's great that she spends extra time doing things to engage your students. My mom then yelled at me for lying to my girlfriend and trying to throw her under the bus because

I was being an insecure jerk. My girlfriend and I also got into a huge fight. I said that she should be embarrassed to be seen in public like that. She said the only thing she was embarrassed by was me. She hasn't spoken to me or done anything for me since that. My friend said that I was horrible and called me trash. I shouldn't have lied, but I think my girlfriend should take what I think about her clothes into consideration, and I'm not sorry for expecting her to dress more appropriately in public. Am I really such a butthole here? OP, I think you're totally justified what your girlfriend

did is super rude and disrespectful to you. No, wait, hold on a second, is the year 2020 or 1940? Opie, there's been literal decades of feminist progress to get rid of this backward sexist attitude. I mean, it's not bad enough that you're trying to control your girlfriend's wardrobe. You also tried to emotionally manipulate your girlfriend by lying about what your mom said. Opie, I'm giving you 4 out of 5 buttholes here. This is super backwards and super sexist.

I would not be surprised at all if you got dumped over this. Also, can I just say that what your girlfriend does with her dresses is super cute. If I were a kid, I would love that. If I were a parent of a kid in school, I would love that. If I were the boyfriend of a preschool teacher who did that, I would also love that. If I were a parent of a kid in school, I would love that. If I were the boyfriend of a preschool teacher who did that, I would also love that because it's super awesome. Also, I'm gonna read this reply from Knights of the Applicants. Bro, what? You're the butthole. Mrs. Frizzle is a treasure and she is not to be disrespected.

That was our slash. Am I the butthole? And if you like this content, check out my Patreon where I publish extra videos. be disrespected.