rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole She Thought I Was A Maid Because I'm Dark-Skinned

Episode Date: May 24, 2021

r/AmITheA**hole OP is a teenage girl who's attending an event with her parent's friends. She also has much darker skin than her siblings. When she goes to clean the dishes, one of the party guests starts talking to OP and just assumes that OP is the maid, apparently because of her dark skin. OP, being a teenager, pranks the guest by going along with their assumption and calling her siblings "young master." When the truth gets revealed, the guest is so embarrassed she has to leave. Who's the butthole here: OP or the guest? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Make every moment a little more magical this season with a Starbucks red cup in your hands. Wrap yourself in the warmth of one of our familiar faves, like a peppermint mocha or a caramel brule latte. Find your festive with the Starbucks app. Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best post from a cross-reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash Amid the Butthole, where a father spends all of his money on drugs instead of his daughter's life-saving heart medication? Am I the butthole for leaving my stepmother out of a mother's day tradition and telling her to get over herself when she confessed to feeling hurt? I'm a 29-year-old woman, and I lost my mom in an accident when I was seven.

My dad met my stepmother a year later. I met her about six months before they got married. I think I was like nine. I was 10 when they got married just for clarity. We have an okay relationship. She never pushed to be my mom, but I always got the sense that she was hurt that I didn't see her as a maternal figure.

I consider her more like an aunt. Also, I'm not super close to any of my aunts or uncles, so it's not the same closest that I have with my dad or that I had with my mom. When I became pregnant with my son six years ago, I came up with this idea to make a little children's book for my kid about my mom. So I made up a story about a brave mother who helped and was there for her daughter, even in death.

And how much she loved and looked out for her and her grandkids. I guess you could think of her as like a guardian angel. My son loves that story. My daughter is still a little bit too young for books, but I read it to her too. Every mother's day since my son was born, I take the book out and read it to my kids, and we keep it in a special place. This year my dad and stepmother decided to stop by for mother's day, and my son was telling her about the book and he showed it to her and she got all quiet. A while later, she pulled me aside and she told me that she felt like she was being left out. Like how it would have been nice to say the mom sent another lady or mother figure or grandma figure to be there.

To offer what she couldn't to make everyone happier and how it hurt her feelings that she's not included in the only Mother's Day tradition that I have with my kids. She said that she wished that she could be something more to me, that she could be something that I would want to celebrate with my kids on Mother's Day. I told her to get over herself. The fact that she gets to be present and my mom doesn't, and that she gets to be regarded more of like an aunt figure is more than most people ever get, she told me that she was just trying to have a conversation, and I was acting like a dick who couldn't respect other people's feelings, or even try to empathize

with her. She told me that I should have tried to make her feel more included instead of feeling more shut out. Am I the butthole? Honestly, OP, yeah, you are the butthole. Like, what did your stepmom do wrong here exactly? She wants to be a mother figure, she cares about you and wants to be involved in your life, she cares about her grandkids and wants to be involved in their life too, and you're angry at her for some reason? I mean, you're not really the butto for leaving her out of the book, I think that's fine, but when she took you aside and had a very normal adult conversation with you, you insulted her for really no reason.

She came to you saying that she was hurt, and your response was to basically say, you should feel lucky that I even tolerate you. OP, that's just plain mean. I'm giving you two out of five buttholes. I'm giving your stepmom zero out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for calling a woman crazy and threatening to kidnap her son? I'm a 40 year old man, and in 2019, my 18 year old son went on a trip with some of his friends.

One of the kid's parents owned a large cabin, and all of them went there for a weekend. It was about 10 boys in total. At that time, my son had already come out to his friends, and he came out to me a few months later. Yesterday, one of the boys from that trip, Frank, made a post about that trip. The post was a video of him and my son kissing and making out. It had the caption, hey, remember this? Apparently on the trip, a game of truth or dare got a little intense, and this friend was

dare to kiss my son. Normally, what the boys post on their social media stays between them, but one of the parents saw the video, recorded it, and started sending it to all the parents. It eventually made its way to me, and then Frank's mom, and Frank's mom freaked out. She immediately called me and asked to speak to me parent to parent. Frank is by, and after he came out, she basically begged him not to tell anyone. All of Frank's friends already knew. And after seeing this video, she's convinced that my son made him gay. She wanted to know what I was going to do about it.

I was genuinely confused and asked her what she meant, and she asked how me and my son intend to help FIX Frank. I called her crazy and told her there was nothing to fix. I then told her that if she didn't love Frank for who he is, I would always make a space for him at my house. Frank is a close friend of my son and he's around often. She then started screaming at me, accusing me of trying to kidnap Frank, and that I was going to make him fully gay while he's still fixable. She's now been telling people that I verbally abused her, called her crazy and insane, and threatened to come and take away Frank.

I've had a lot of people, mostly parents, tell me that I'm the butthole for how I treated her, and that I shouldn't interfere with things that don't involve me. Now, I know 100% that she's the butthole for the thing she said about my son in Frank, but I'm starting to think that I might also be the butthole for the way that I handled it. I probably shouldn't have yelled, and I may have just made it worse for Frank, so am I the butthole? OP, how can you possibly be the butthole for sticking your nose in someone else's business when she called you to complain about your son's relationship with her son?

If anything, she's the one who was sticking her nose in other people's business. And on top of that, she was implying that being gay is wrong when you have a gay son. So she wasn't just insulting her own son, she was insulting your son too. You had every right to shut down that homophobia. Also, kudos to you for offering Frank a place to stay if she ever kicks him out. Opie, I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving her three out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for asking my dad why he thinks his drugs are more important than mine? I'm a 17 year old girl and I have a heart condition that requires medication that isn't cheap. It's just me and my dad at home. My dad earns well, the bills are always paid,

and I have what I need, but he's got an expensive drug habit. Usually he makes sure that he buys my medication first, but I guess this month he forgot. Yesterday, I asked him how he was going to get my medication after realizing how overboard he went, and he said he didn't know, and that it was time that I figured it out. I reminded him that I'm 17 with no job, and this could turn into a life or death thing fast. He repeated that it's time for me to find a way. This went back and forth for a while and eventually I could see the guilt in his face so I snapped.

So why in God's name do you think that your drugs are more important than mine? Do you just not give an F whether I live or die at this point? I felt really bad about this, so I left to stay with a friend. My dad texted me this morning and apologized for the way he acted and the problem he caused, but he said that I'm the butthole for the things that I said to him last night. He thinks I should have been more considerate towards his issues and not think so selfishly.

Am I the butthole? Alright OP, oh my god. So I don't know what drugs you're talking about with your dad. I assume pot, I hope it's pot, because at least pot is legal in a lot of places and pot's not too bad. If it's not pot, then this post is absolutely horrifying. This means that your dad literally risking his daughter's life so he can shoot up or whatever, it literally doesn't matter.

There's not a thing on earth that this guy could spend money on that would justify the purpose because if he doesn't spend his money on your heart medication, his own flesh and blood daughter could die of what a heart attack, heart failure. I don't know, this is making me flustered and angry because I have a daughter and I can't even imagine what I would want to buy instead of saving my daughter's life. What the fuck am I reading? OP, you get zero out of five buttholes. I'm very, very deeply sorry that this happened to you. You absolutely don't deserve it, but I want to be clear to you, OP. This story very, very clearly shows that your father is not a fit parent. You're 17 and you don't have a job. I hate to say this,

but the reality is that you have to go find a job immediately, because you clearly can't rely on your father anymore. You just can't. Oh, I feel bad saying this because it seems from the post that you still love your father, so I don't want to turn you away from this advice. OP, you have a medical condition. You need this medication. You've relied on your father to get this medication for you and your father has dropped the ball.

Hopefully, that's a one-time event, but are you willing to bet your life that it's only a one time mistake? If you are, then hopefully your dad fixes this mistake. If you aren't, then please go get a job. Because if your dad can't afford this medication, then you have to, unfortunately. OP, you get zero out of five buttholes. Your dad gets five out of five buttholes. Now streaming on Paramount Plus. Hey, baby, I hear the blues It's calling tall salads and scrambled eggs. Y'all know how this goes and maybe I seem a bit confused. Yeah, maybe, but I got you picked.

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Discover Gifts of Luxury at eveta.com Discover Gives of Luxury at eveta.com In my the butthole for abandoning a grieving friend after she tried to charge me rent My friend is a recent widow. It's been a long time coming but that hardly makes it easier Her husband passed away at the end of February and she's been understandably distraught since I've tried my best to support her through this, even though I can't possibly understand what she's going through. At the beginning of March, she asked me if I'd stay over during the night because she couldn't stay in sleeping alone in an empty house. I obliged, and temporarily moved in once I was sure that my husband was okay with it.

She hasn't been taking care of herself, so I've been doing 100% of the household chores and taking care of her, as well as working full-time Well last week she's praying on me how much she'll be expecting and rent from here on out She heavily implied that I was trying to take advantage of her in her grief by trying to live in our house for free And that she expects me to back pay her rent for the two months that I'd already been there I told her I was extremely insulted by this, and I told her that I'd transfer her the money that she wanted, but I was going to be moving back to my own house, where I am also paying rent. I got my stuff and I was gone

within a couple of hours. She's since asked me to come back, but I've refused. I told her that I'd still do her shopping and I'd come over to help her with a few bits, but I am not spending another night in that house. Am I the butthole? Not OP. Based on this story, you've been acting like a model friend. You basically put your whole life on hold so you can care for your friend. And then she thinks that you're trying to take advantage of her by living there rent-free?

I mean, sure, you are living there rent-free, but you have another place where you can live with your husband. Also, the fact that she asked you to stay there and then demanded rent is extremely exploitative. OP, I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving your friend two out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for telling a parent that it's their kid's own fault for being mistreated? I'm a 27-year-old woman who's a preschool teacher. I have this one student, Connor. If someone sits three inches from where they're supposed to sit, Connor, who's six years old, runs up to me to report it. If someone spells a drop of milk on the table, he tells on them. If someone happens to brush past him, he says,

That other student just pushed me and threw me to the ground. When someone almost ran into him on a bike, he says that they rode over his toes on purpose and he's an incredible pain. When a girl was painting next to Connor and picked up a pen, Connor started crying and said, she took a pen that I was thinking of using soon. If someone was playing with a toy that he wanted, he would throw a tantrum until they got fed up and gave it to him. Connor's behavior has led to the other kids keeping their distance from him. They've even stopped playing with him outside of school.

We've tried to get him to be included during school hours and we've had multiple talks with them but to no avail. The other kids tell us that they feel like they have to walk on eggshells around him and it's tiring. We've had countless meetings with his parents as well who just dismiss our concerns. He's been evaluated and he doesn't have any diagnoses, disabilities or anything.

The main issue arose when another student, Sarah, had a birthday party and everyone in the class was invited except for Connor. He was understandably upset and crying. As expected, Connor's mom was there the next day, fuming. She told us we had to force Sarah to invite her son by any means possible. When we said that we have no control over what happens after school, and that no, we can't call a meeting with all the parents and tell them that they have to make their kids spend time with Connor. She was furious. She even

tried to approach Sarah, but we blocked her and said that she is not allowed to talk to her. The poor girl was really scared. The next day, Sarah's mom, who's a wonderful woman, told us that Connor's mom had called her and shouted at her for not inviting him. She didn't know if she should just invite Connor, but Sarah and a few of her friends had specifically asked for him to not be there. I told Sarah's mom that we would support and respect her wishes. Well, the party was last night, and Connor was not invited. Connor's mom showed up the next day, and we stepped away to talk. Well, I talked. She shouted. I was pretty fed up, and I was wondering if I should call security. She kept screaming and blaming everything and everyone, but when she called us useless and competent teachers who

do nothing while her completely innocent kid was being emotionally abused, I had enough. I told her that Connor wasn't completely innocent though because we had many talks, and he was excluded because of his own behavior towards others, and based on what we'd seen in her, it was pretty understandable. Well, she started shouting and shrieking, and told me that I was going to lose my job. I decided to call security after all. So, I want to know, did I go too far by saying that it was Connor's own fault for not being invited? What? You can't force kids to be friends. If Sarah doesn't want to be friends with Connor,

what are you supposed to do about it? Also, like you said, OP, you have no control over Connor's birthday party. That's a private, completely separate affair from your daycare. OP, you get zero out of five buttholes. If anything, Connor and his mother could really use a dose of reality. Connor gets one out of five buttholes. If anything, Connor and his mother could really use a dose of reality.

Connor gets 1 out of 5 buttholes, and Connor's mom gets 2.5 out of 5 buttholes. I think I'm starting to see where Connor gets his behavior from. Am I the butthole from embarrassing my brother's friend's parent when she thought that I was the house made? I'm a 16 year old girl, and I have no idea how genetics work, but my maternal grandmother had dark skin while my grandfather had fair skin. My mother was born relatively fair, and so was my father, but I ended up the same dark skin as my grandmother. My two brothers are fair skin too, which makes me stand out a little.

So what happened was, my little brother had just turned five, and my parents invited four of his friends and their parents to our house for a small party. I was cleaning things in the kitchen while my mother went upstairs. That's when I was approached by one of the parents who passed me some plates to wash and asked if I could speak English, to which I replied yes as a second language. That's not a lie because it's true for me and my whole family. She didn't proceed to ask me about how long I've been staying there, how's my family, etc. By that time, it was clear to me that she thought that I was the house made. Instead of correcting her, I decided to entertain myself by playing along.

I started to refer to my parents as Sir and Madam, and I cooked up a whole load of BS to answer questions about my life. When I was done cleaning, I went back to the hall with my parents and mischievously called my brother, Young Master, which confused him. And then my mother came downstairs and I called her Madame, twitchy immediately realized what had happened and told me to stop it. Then my mom told the parent that I'm her daughter, the sister of the birthday boy. I have to admit, everyone laughed at the misunderstanding. But the parent who made the assumption, instead of laughing it off, they became very red in the face. She apologized, then she took her

kid and left the party just like that. It was kind of awkward for a while, but the party went on without them since there are still three more kids with my brother. My parents told me after the party that I had taken it too far by embarrassing the parents and they wanted me to apologize to her the next time we meet, if there is the next time. I refused to, because I think she kind of asked for it. I couldn't stop myself from having a little fun. And who the heck just assumed someone to be the housemate and get all nosy about their life?

Am I the butthole for embarrassing her? No OP, that parent's reaction was strange. Why did she automatically assume that you were a maid instead of, you know, something like an adopted kid or something? The fact that she just assumed that you're the house made because you had dark skin? Oh my god. It's no wonder she left the party after that. I would have done the exact same thing. Let me clarify. I would have done the exact same thing as in I would have left the party. I would not have done the exact same thing as in I would not have assumed that the 16-year-old

dark-skinned girl is the house maid. That's very racist, very ignorant, and very disrespectful. A couple of people are trying to say that OP is the butthole because she could have just corrected the mistake instead of lying, but yeah, it seemed kind of weak to me. A teenager playing a slightly embarrassing prank on a parent is not the same thing as a stranger walking into your home and assuming that you're the help because of your dark skin color. OP, I'm giving the parent 3 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving you 0.5 out of 5 buttholes. That was our slash in my The Butthole, and if you like this content, check out my Patreon

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