rSlash - r/Choosingbeggars Do You Have Any More Drugs I Can Steal?

Episode Date: November 3, 2020

r/Choosingbeggars In today's episode, OP attends a wedding and leaves her prescription drugs in her purse in a private room. That was apparently a stupid a mistake, because one of the wedding guests breaks into her room, steals her prescription drugs, and then approaches OP to ask if she has any other drugs that he can steal. Normally I'd think someone like this is a moron, but in this case he's probably just high as a kite. If you like this content, follow for more daily Reddit content! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

To support sustainable food production, BHP is building one of the world's most sustainable pot-ash mines in Canada. Essential resources responsibly produced. It's happening now at BHP, a future resources company. Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best posts from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash using beggars where a woman tries to hire a lawyer with cookies. I did a free drawing for this girl in exchange for a shout-out and she just emailed me back.

It looks nothing like me. Then proceeded to post my art on her instead, talking trash about me. In the email that choosing beggar wrote, I'm sorry, hun, but that looks nothing like me. And on the Instagram post where she posted the picture she wrote, please don't draw me emoji laughing while crying emoji, like ever, especially if it looks like this. And what makes this post so good

is that her Instagram account is a positivity Instagram. You can do it a push through life, health and beauty, free space, open space. Let's talk POP, positive on purpose. Look at you, you're tired, but you ain't giving up. Be stronger than yesterday. A great life requires a great commitment, a commitment called everyday, daily work on yourself. So, I think that when the choosing beggar is feeling really down from a long day of just trashing on innocent people non-stop, she looks at all of her motivational posts and thinks

to herself, no, choosing beggar, you're better than this. I know that you're tired, but get out there and keep harassing people for no reason. You can do it." On this next post, OP is unemployed and married to an attorney, and she wants to get a divorce. So to find a divorce lawyer, she turns to her church, and when it doesn't go our way, she posted this online. The following examples, I think, may be more of a difference in our culture. In my church community, this kind of bartering is commonplace and accepted.

This lawyer is not religious, so I think she's in familiar or comfortable with this idea. I asked her if she could do my divorce for free since she's a lawyer. She said she doesn't do family law, but gave me the name of a friend of hers who does do family law for me to call. I didn't want to pay for a lawyer because they're super expensive. So I called his assistant and asked if he could do my divorce and in exchange I would bake him some freshly baked cookies. My baking is out of this world, seriously. I left several messages and he never got back to me. So I asked my lawyer friend if she could call him and find out why he hadn't replied.

She sort of put me off and never really responded, so I kept asking her, but gave up after she wouldn't commit to calling him. I guess she told our friend that she thought it was entitled to expect this lawyer who didn't know me to do my divorce for free. Even though it wouldn't have been free, I was offering him baked goods. Again, this kind of bartering, I'll paint your deck and you give me a casserole. Or I'll look after your cat while you're on vacation and you bring me back some spices from Mexico. It's very common in my community. So I didn't see anything wrong with it.

I would love to see how this lady responded if someone tried this exact same logic on her. Lady, you give me your car and in exchange I'll mow your lawn. Deal? On this next post, OP is a sex worker. Are you blank from Seattle? Yes, this is her. Are you available for this Friday for 30 minutes? I charge by the hour at $190 and I always round up the time.

So you'd be paying $190 if that's okay, let me know. Can you pay me for travel? I'm a very important banker. Excuse me? No, you have to pay out a pocket for your own travel. That's what I expect my clients to do. Listen here, you black slut. I know how you work. Then this guy sends a dick pick and says, worship my white, and pay for my travel.

Be a little good cotton-picking girl. Oh my God, what did I just read? Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho Open checking account. Your account is very important to us here at Bank of America. Ah, yes, I'm a very important banker. Giving away a free futon. Can you please deliver? No, sorry. Okay, the reason I was asking is because I don't drive. The reason I'm giving it away for free is because I don't have a vehicle big enough to move it. Oh, you said it comes apart, right?

The frame comes apart, not the mattress. Okay, I wish I could get there, but I don't have a car. What about taking it apart and strapping it to the top of your car? Here's an idea, buddy. What about you just walk here? We strap it to your back and you walk home with it. Selling 34-inch curved monitor for $350. It's just a small TV, I can do like $50, but that's generous.

Lol, really? First off, it's not a TV, it's a monitor. Second, the model only slightly newer than this goes for $700. This is in perfect condition and $350 is a fair price. I would suggest doing a little research or even reading the description before making such a laughably low offer. Listen, here a good kid. Handsome too. I know you've got a lot of growing up to do. Would it make you feel better if I offer, say, $75? F off. Does your mother know that's how you speak? I'm disappointed in you. And you, Fob. Don't ever speak to me like that again. Hello. Exactly. Keep your mouth shut and move on.

Good luck. Shut your mouth. Golly G. Willikers lady, you think that I'm a good kid and handsome too? In that case, please take this $300 discount. Costco Return Policy Sucks Now? Costco wouldn't accept my return. I bought a VIO IP router that allows free calls to the US and Canada about 7 years ago. There was a rumor about the VIO IP company going bankrupt at the time of my purchase. So I bought it from Costco in case I needed to return in because I've heard people raving about Costco's return policy. I bought it from Costco even though it was more expensive to buy from Costco than online stores because of Costco's return policy. Well, the router broke after seven years and I went to my local

Costco to return it. The employee at the return counter called the store manager to process my return. And the manager said the store manager to process my return, and the manager said that she couldn't accept my return because it was too old. I went to another store and the manager at the other location told me the same thing. So how long is considered to be too old to return a product? I've bought many electronics that aren't bound by the six month return policies such as computers from Costco, even though they were more expensive, because I thought Costco would cover returns like this. Now, I don't see myself buying anything other than groceries at Costco unless there's some crazy sale going on. How long before this idiot

starts trying to return his groceries, too? Hello, I bought groceries from you and I ate them all, and now, two days later, they're all brown and stinky. I'd like a full refund, please. On this next post, BBC News covers a cake maker with the headline, I'm sick of influencers asking for free cake. And then someone down in the comments replies, so it's all about money for this woman? Whatever happened to passion and pride. She just sits there counting her pennies, demanding more and more money for her unhealthy creations. Yeah, the audacity of this woman to expect money for her time and materials. And this guy's profile is submissive senior information technology business something,

I would guess consultant. Do you think this guy consults on IT for the sheer joy of IT and does it completely free of charge? Or does this entitled douchebag bring in a six-figure salary because, yeah, that's how jobs work. As the world's population grows, so does the need for resources like Potash to support sustainable food production. This is why BHP is building one of the world's most sustainable Potash mines in Canada. Essential resources responsibly produced. This is what BHP has committed to Canada.

The future is clear. It's happening now at BHP, a future resources company. To discover how, visit bhp.com slash better future. Childhood vaccines have been around for decades and are safe and proven to help protect children against 14 preventable diseases. Learn more at Canada.ca slash childhood vaccines. A message from the government of Canada.

How much will you charge me? Uh, full price. What do you mean? I was hoping that since we're cool, you would hook me up with a discount low. Why is it that in order for us to be cool, I got to be the one hooking you up. Why don't you hook me up with my full price plus a tip since we're so cool? Do you have any old cell phones? Why? For your uncle until his new phone arrives. Oh, hmm. I'm not sure I have a working phone, Mom.

I have some very old phones that work, but only to Sim card adapter. He doesn't need a very old phone, has to be iPhone 6 or above. Um, hello? Excuse me. When did I become a phone store? Hey, is your sofa set still available? Hi, yes, it's available. How is the condition?

How firm are the seats? It's an excellent condition, and the seats are more on the soft side but very comfortable. Okay, how negotiable is the price, and can you deliver? I'm willing to negotiate, but we'll only accept a reasonable offer. Also, it's only for pickup, as I mentioned in the ad. How much were you asking? $450? Will you take $180? up as I mentioned in the ad. How much were you asking? $450.

Will you take $180? I can do $190 if you deliver. Are you serious? I said I'll accept a reasonable offer and you're offering $180. And only $10 for delivery when running a U-Haul truck will be at least $60 to $70. The lowest I'll go is $400. I can do $200, but only if you deliver. I have a bad back and can't live to anything heavy.

Let's say I agree to deliver it. Who will unload it and take it inside if you have a bad back? You can bring someone to help you to bring it inside my apartment. You've got to be kidding me. $400 and you pick it up, plus bring someone to help you. Did anyone else notice that she asked if the price was negotiable before OP even told her the price? Meaning it doesn't matter what OP was selling the sofa for, she was still gonna try

to hackle him down. Hey, are you still selling the iPad? Yeah. Will you sell for $100? Sell a brand new, never open $400 iPad for $100? No. Come on, if you're selling it, it must be broke, so it can't be worth more than a hundred. I already told my kid he could have it.

Well go ahead and untill you're kid because he ain't getting it. You missed a video call chat with Choosing Beggar. Why are you video calling me? I want you to tell my kid to his face and he won't be getting any presents this year because of you. OP, you should have accepted that call and been like, sorry kid, you've got to choosing Beger for a parent who's too cheap to get you real presents. Tough luck kid.

Our next reddit posted from Cupcake Commercial. My sister smokes. On top of this, she smokes very expensive cigarettes where we live. Each pack is almost $10. That's pricey here. She packs her like $4. Which I didn't really care about before she had a job because how she spends her paycheck, the part's not being used to care for her kids anyway, isn't really my business. But she quit her job. LMAO, yeah, during the pandemic. A month or so ago, because she, and I quote, don't wanna deal with that B word, both of mine anymore.

And what's coasting on the money she'd saved. Well, now she's run out of money. Shocker, and instead of looking for another job, she's instead going to try selling her car. But in the meantime, she's broke with no way to buy cigarettes. I don't smoke, so she can't bump anything off of me, but our mom smokes, so my sister could technically bump a couple off of her, but she doesn't because mom smokes, those

sucky cheap cigarettes. No, she wants her brand of cigarettes. She's never heard the term beggars can't be choosers, it seems. So she's been in a pissy mood for a full week because she can't afford her expensive cigarettes, won't accept the cheap ones, and none of us are coughing up $10 to buy her a pack that she'll blow through and maybe a week. But today, I had had enough of her sucky attitude and decided to do her a favor. I said that if she would drive me to a fast food restaurant so I could get us all some

food, her kids included, then I'd help her get some gas and pack a cigarette. She eagerly agreed, but rejected my offer to get her any food. And the place I wanted to eat wasn't open yet, so she'd have to wait until they opened. Then she sort of paused and asked if I really wanted food from the place that I wanted and not the place that she wanted, which is closer. I say no, I've been craving something specific from the place that I want to go to, so she relends and says okay, and that she's gonna be sitting outside drinking coffee until then. So maybe 20 minutes go by, and I go outside to get my sister a written list of what to get. And as I get close to the side porch door, which is open, I hear her complaining about having to go

through the drive-through for me to our mom. Just how I'm so rude for asking her to drive so far, and how the food from the place where I want to go to is just sooo epic gross. And how she didn't even want to do this anyways. Well, I heard our mom tell her to be grateful because nobody else was offering to buy her food, gas, and her fancy cigarettes. Well, my sister scoffed and started saying something else, but I walked outside and she shut up. Mom and her had wide eyed looks, but I reached out and plucked my credit card,

which she was gonna use to get everything from her hand and just said, never mind, I don't want to burden you, I'll just order through door dash instead. Then walked back inside. She tried to call me back and say that she was just messing around, but I ignored her. And when I made it clear that I wasn't buying her stuff or coming back, I heard her pitching a huge baby fit. And our mom laughing and telling her she did this to herself by being ungrateful. So yeah, my sister threw a fit and wore a self-out

before going and sitting in her car for a few hours to pout. I really had no issue helping her if she did a little favor for me in return. But I'm not gonna help anyone who complains about my help behind my back. OP, your sister has a kid and she quit her job and is about to sell her car. And she got more excited about her cigarettes than food for her child.

Her being a choosing beggar is pretty bad, but her being a reckless mother is way worse. Our next reddit post is from Caw 3098. So I was a bride's maid in a wedding and the menu was two stories. The bride and bride's maid got dressed in her private suite upstairs and we were able to leave our belongings in there once we went downstairs for the ceremony. About 20 minutes into the reception, this obnoxious douchebag that had been insufferable all through the wedding. By doing back flips and stuff for attention and yelling out during the ceremony to participate, comes confidently strolling

up to me and shows me my own bottle of Adderall and says, So you have these, so I'm guessing you have something better, right? Excuse me? I snatched the bottle out of his hand. Where did you get these? From your purse, obviously. But where'd you keep the better stuff? Xanax, Oxy? Why didn't you have those in there?

Well I'm just so sorry that when you snuck upstairs and went through my purse, my prescription medications didn't satisfy you. Get the F away from me immediately. Wow, what a beward. He then proceeded to jog off to tell the other guests what a jerk I was. The guy then asked me to give him a ride home that night. A FOR OUR DRIVE. Opie, I know that it seemed ridiculous that he would ask you to give him a ride, but if you think about it, it actually makes perfect sense. After all, you could have just popped a couple of batter all and made that 8 hour round trip drive no problem.

I'm finding lately with age, my feet are getting soar after a day's work, and I was wondering if anyone would like to visit me in my home to massage my feet for free. I can offer a tea, biscuits, and witty banter, but unfortunately no money. You know, at first glance, it seems like a choosing beggar, but I bet if they posted on some sort of foot fetish website, they might actually get a few hits. That was our slash-truising beggarist, and if you like this content, then check out my Patreon where I published episodes that were banned from YouTube. Also, be sure to follow me because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day. Also, be sure to follow me because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.